Dumb People Town - Mike Glazer - Real Open Concept

Episode Date: August 27, 2024

Comedian Mike Glazer (Life Rules!) stops by Jason describes a Florida man that was arrested for hurling fried chicken at his sister during an argument, Daniel explains how a Florida man disowned the drugs that were wrapped around his penis when caught by police, and Randy warns against burning down the house you're about to show as a realtor, and so much more!

Hey townies welcome to another episode of Dumb People Town Population you I'm in the shade Glaser Mike Glaser What's happening? I'm pretty dumb I've done many dumb things Welcome to Dumb People Town

You're Missouri right? Yeah we can talk about it if we want We can talk about it It'll probably take over the episode What part? Parkway North baby Yeeeeeeees I was just there in St. Louis

Were you in St. Louis? Jay went to a place in his head Wait we've had this conversation before. We met maybe eight years ago at this point. Where? This is like officially the first, like at the improv lab. Yes.

Something like that. And did we talk Parkway North? We did. I brought it up and I was like, just so you all know, and we were gonna talk about it, but then you had to hit the stage and do your thing. Okay, so I'm not losing my mind. Not at all.

That we started this conversation. Okay. We're gonna end it now. Now, it ends here. So I was just back in St. Louis. My daughter was looking at WashU. I'm not losing my mind that we started this conversation. We're gonna end it now. It ends here. So I was just back in St. Louis. My daughter was looking at Wash U. What's Parkway North in relation to Creve Cours?

It's in Creve Cours. I know. Don't you dare pronounce it the proper way. I got this from you guys. Correct French pronunciation. What's going on here, man? It's De Pere. Is it called the Ladies Cliff or something?

No. All right, but where is Parkway North in relation to? Close, it's in the same, it's in there. It's the, what high school did you go to area? Yeah, oh yeah. So Parkway has North, Central, South and West. South and West. Well, Parkway North is the high school?

It's the high school. Oh, I didn't know if that was the name of the town or something. Parkway is the school district, North, South, Central and West. And then we went to Parkway East, middle, junior high school, which is now Parkway Northeast. It is?

Yeah, it's called Northeast. And it's into the middle. Even though our public system is failing us, I'm just glad we're getting our cardinal directions correct. Oh yeah. Thank goodness, Central couldn't have been anything else. Central was not Central, and they had great, Central had some good athletes and stuff

that came through there. Cute girls always. Yeah, oh my God. God bless us. Anyway. And North was on like the dumbest street ever, Fifi Road. Fifi.

And our school colors were acid and wash. That's right. That's not good at all. And we had a smoking lounge. Not for the teachers. For the students. Yeah, Marlboro Reds, let's go. And I'll be honest, Glitcher,

we both have big comedy dreams, but in 2010 when we were in the back bar at Second City, I didn't know we'd be doing this someday. Look how far we've come, man. Damn. Still dumb, but we picked our way up. Yeah, we figured out how to market it. I'd be like, that woman shouldn't be smoking,

she's pregnant, she's a senior. Yeah, yeah. Shout out to Julie Trout. Oh, and he's still talking about this senior. Shout out to Julie Trowell. Friend of the show, Brad Morris, would just bring us food from restaurants. Love that guy. Remember when he bought the Cubanos?

He would like go, there was like this great Cuban place over by Smoke. You gotta ask him where to go. He just gave me a great rec in Chicago. He is, he's the connecting guy. He's the secret mayor. I'm like, where do I go? He's like Dove's Luncheonette.

I'm like, boom, all right, there you go. Why do I look like I work at the Guitar Center or a DJ on a 1980s radio? You're like the guy who sets the speakers up for the Bar Mitzvah DJ. Okay. All right, take us. First story.

Florida Man sent in by Derek the Legendary Daddy at Game Design Dude, who is not Derek Lipkin. Not Derek Lipkin, it's a different guy. Game Design Dude, been around for a while. All right. Florida Man arrested for hurling fried chicken at his sister during argument. Why waste it?

Hurling. Hurling. You have to be so mad. Hurling makes it more aggressive, right? 100%. Tossing? Could have said tossing. Could have said hurdling.

Cops don't get involved in a toss. We're hurdling towards like a climate disaster. Hurling, hurling. Hurling? So Ran, remember one of the sports we covered on Cheap Seats was hurling? That's with like Irish stick. They're throwing a ball and they're hitting each other. It's like field hockey.

Hurling. Field hockey with hitting. Oh, okay. A Florida man was arrested after an argument between him and his sister. Is that good English? Between argument between him and his sister. Should be between his sister and him. Yeah.

It's just poorly written. I'd rather not chime in. I don't know. argument between him and his sister. Should be between his sister and him. Yeah, it's just poorly written. I'd rather not chime in. I don't know those words. Don't be smart. I'd throw a chicken at the guy who wrote that. You'd get arrested. A Florida man was arrested after arguing between him and his sister, escalated to the point he started to hurl fried chicken at his sibling during their spat in their home. This is really the worst- I agree with Mike, waste of chicken. related to the point, he started to hurl fried chicken at his sibling during their spat in their home. This is literally the worst-

I agree with Mike, waste of chicken. You said that. Again, waste. And also the worst written sentence I've ever heard. At one point calls it his sister, then calls it sibling, one long sentence. Okay. Fried chicken. I'm gonna pronounce the name-

And we're gonna love this person like nobody's business? No. You're gonna understand why they're crazy. Kanye. K-H-A-N-Y-E. Kanye. Oh my gosh. Yay for short.

Sure, ha. Edra Yeezy. Yeezy? This is a chosen name. Medley. I'm not gonna tell you how old. Was taken into custody on Monday. What'd you say? 24. 24, what'd you say? Oh, I'm gonna gonna tell you how old. It was taken into custody on Monday. What'd you say?

24. 24, what'd you say? Oh, I'm gonna go 31. 63. That's great. I don't know. 20 years old, Danny. Wow, nice.

One year off. It was taken into custody on Monday by Clearwater police on a domestic battery charge jail record show. After you went- Oh wait, can we do the battery joke? Just cause it was fried chicken. Sure. Yeah, it was battered, Just cause it was fried. Sure. Chicken. Yeah, it was battered, battered, battered.

Lightly battered. Lightly battered. Lightly battered. It was light battery. Jail record show after he allegedly launched a piece of chicken at his sister's back the previous afternoon. She's walking away.

You can't, I mean that's like shooting someone in the back. You can't throw, you can't launch. No honor. Launch a piece of chicken at the back. Mr. Medley who lives with his sister, not for long, at their Clearwater residence is claimed to have gotten into a verbal altercation with his sibling and arrest affidavit obtained by the smoking gun stated and she walked away While the siblings were, she walked away. She had. Power move would be turn around, pick that chicken up. Eat it.

Eat it. And throw it back at him. The bones. While the siblings were exchanging words, Mr. Medley allegedly grabbed a bag of chicken from the victim and began hurling chicken at her. I used to know a guy. You want this?

You like this? You like this? You like this? Who would eat the bones? No. What? Bones and all. What? Bones and all?

Yeah. Jay Lorette. Oh. Jay Lorette? He ran the mobile church out of the truck stop. And he would eat, he would, yes. That's a serial killer, dude. Jay, you done?

That's a really nice guy. Dan, Dan, hang out. Check his crawl space. Dan, check his crawl space, sir. No need. This is my impression of Dan trying to be nice to him and get him to not eat the bones. You done with that, Jay?

I'll throw it for ya. Oh, you don't have it. No, I got it. I remember watching him eat the bone from a drum. Was he making eye contact with you the entire time? No, he was in the zone. If he's looking at you, oh, he's like kind of glazed and no offense, glazed.

He's glazed and he's looking off in the distance. The chicken was from a place called churches in quotations, as if they've never heard of churches. Is it from churches or is it not from churches? Might be slang. Then it said possibly meaning churches, Texas chicken, which has a location down the road from their residence, the affidavit. He's got doubts, his own reporting. I know, also this is an ad, which has a location down the road from their residence, the affidavit.

He's got doubts his own reporting. I know. Also, this is an ad? Is this an ad? Please. Come on down to Church's. Chicken's so good you can throw it at your sister. Location down the road from their residence, the affidavit hastened to add.

Hastened to add? Why are you suddenly becoming literary and then you aren't half the time? One piece of the fried chicken struck the victim in the back and left debris of food on her shoulders the affidavit Debris debris Detritus little crispies you know who'd eat that bone Jail a trail never right liver at the rat the right you call him the Trump While officers were interviewing mr. Medley He admitted to throwing two pieces of fried chicken at his sister one of which hit her so he missed I've been denying it

You know what? I bet he missed with a wing something lighter Yeah, we probably sailed on him then he wanted that heftiness of like a thigh Give me a too big give me a thigh and a leg and I'll throw the whole thing at her. I want that debris going on her shoulders. When asked as to what, when asked at what motivated him, I'm hastening to say, when asked at what motivated him to start throwing the chicken at her, this is the worst written thing ever. Like a five-year-old wrote this. Maybe. I'm incensed

at the right. Little reporter day at the newspaper. Mr. Medley claimed he did it because quote, he had not eaten and did not want the piece of chicken the victim offered him. So he became upset. That feels like a good reason. I'm sorry. 100%. Should not be going to jail. He had not eaten and he did not like the piece that he was given.

Yeah, logical last step. He had not eaten and he did not like the piece that he was given. Maybe he was just giving a tiny wing. That's a bad piece if you're just giving a tiny wing. I ordered drums only. Drums only on the wing order is such a call. I like them all. The 20 year old was released at B-Dubz. Pinellas. Jay and I went to B-Dubz and, and I know Shane Gillis talks about it,

it makes me laugh so hard. Your B-Dub's crew, but we went to B-Dub's in Cleveland across from, those are some of the best wings I've ever had. Ever. And we ordered, my mouth is watering right now. We ordered boneless. Boneless, and we were.

Garlic and lemon or whatever it is. And then like a buffalo and then Garlic farm! And then we watched, I'll eat a turnip like a NCAA tournament games How many could you eat right now? I'm not shitting you, I could eat 40 If you said you have to eat 40 to save your kids lives, I'd be like you picked the wrong man I could do 20 right now

How many could you do right now? Boneless B-Dubs Oh boneless 40 Yeah I could do a 40 record easy Absolutely, I have the app. I have the Bdubs app. I'm serious You have the Bdubs app? When are we going to Bdubs? We have a good 36 more minutes should we place an order to the studio? Okay, this is not the first time this week that food has been used in a battery case, Mike. Probably a funnel cake assault.

In Pinellas County. As another man was arrested Thursday after he flung pasta with sauce at another driver during a road rage incident. I think we did that one. We did. I've covered that, yes. Sophie Buttle.

And who, was that Nolan Goines? Yes, that was the Nolan Goines. There you go, we know that whole story about that. We did it with Sophie Buttle. He was taking the, that's the Nolan Goines. There you go, we know that whole story about that. We did it with Sophie Buddle. He was taking the, that's the same county. Canadian Sopranos. Same county, same county.

I wanna know who wrote this. So this is a county where, just in Clearwater, where it's like people are like, when I'm done with my food, my food is for two things. One, eatin' and two, throwin'. Yeah. Yeah. You gotta be happy, from law enforcement. I came here to do two things.

Eat this chicken and throw this chicken. like I'm done eating from a law enforcement standpoint in Florida. You're so happy. It's not swords You are but like if you're the cop and you get like this is like as a parent When your kid calls you in to do something, right? when your kid calls you in to do something that you do not need to have got, get up from the thing you're doing to go all the way in to do that thing, that's the way these cops feel. They have to be like, let me see the scars.

It hit the back of your clothes. Or to the other person, they go, what are you doing throwing chicken? Yeah. Come on. You don't think it'd be fun to wear rubber gloves and put a Ziploc bag for evidence and put chicken in a bag and mark it for the courts?

I think that sounds CSI. This is allegedly churches. Birds of a feather. Ah! Yeah! The just a little tape. Are you doing the beginning of CSI? Of course.

Yeah! I'm trying to think of some sort of. Tape around a drumstick, like on the floor. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Real fun, real fun. I got a lot of ideas, but it looks like this one's bone dry. Yeah! You can be my wingman anytime.

Yeah! He got stabbed all the way to the dark meat. Oh, that was good too. I just appreciate that. Just keep going. All right, story number- He got stabbed all the way to the dark meat I just appreciate they All right story number story number one down in the books we come back We'll find out what we have going on find out what Mike's got going on You can check that out all of that Hey gang welcome back to the show. Before Daniel jumps into a hilarious story, no doubt, we should tell you, number one,

if this drops before August 9th, which it may or may not, if it does, we're doing a live Dumb People Town at the Bell House in Brooklyn. We've got Chloe Trost on the show as of right now. We've got Ted Leo playing music on the show. We love doing that venue and doing live down in People Towns. Let's sell it out. It's gonna be a blast.

And let's just do that. Let's sell it out and add another show. God damn it. That'd be fun. That'd be a blast. Also, for people who are gonna be in Michigan, we are going to be in Ann Arbor doing a show at the Michigan Theater

on the Friday night, the September 27th. Who are they playing? That weekend's Minnesota, it's Parents Weekend, so all the alumni will be there. Let's sell that out, I'd love to sell it. 1,400 seats, can we do it? I think we can. Let's do it.

Let's go to supersclives.com, all the tickets, links and all that other stuff is there. Mike, where can people catch you, check you out, shows you got going on. Did you show at the store monthly? Yeah. They messed up the schedule, that's why I wasn't there last week. I was really excited to perform with you, man. So was you, check you out, shows you got going on. Did you show up to the store monthly? Yeah. They messed up the schedule, that's why I wasn't there last week.

I was really excited to perform with you, man. So was I, and then I found out that they were like, oh, we gave you the wrong time. And I was like, oh, it's okay. What's the show, tell people the show. It's called Glazer's After Party, the last Thursday of every month, 8 p.m. It's an after party, even though it's before the second show.

And we hand out micro surprises, I would say. Oh, nice. You surprises, I would say. Things like that. It's a real fun time we turn up. How does the audience, at what point in the show does the show get really good? Great, like 40 minutes in. 40 minutes in?

That's when you're like, okay, everybody's on a nice little playing journey. You can feel the shift. Everyone's real excited, then everyone settles in, watches great comedy, and then around 40 minutes, it's a community, and we're all together. I love that. So truthfully, I know you bring that up in a fun way,

but that's what I love partially about going out and doing comedy on the road, and doing comedy out there is that there's a room full of people, we're all focusing and coalescing on one idea and thought when everyone laughs, you're like, we can all be one, you guys. So this takes that community level to a higher plane.

Okay, now. And we'll be right back. I know, but you know what I mean? So it's every month at the store? 100%, every month at the store. 100 months. 100 months. And then I'm gonna drop my Netflix is a joke festival

presents Mike Laser on my YouTube sometime soon. We'll see when it's done being edited. And that's at Mike Glazer. That's my name, it's my YouTube. Great. G-L-A-Z-E-R. Yeah, hit him with a Z. Did he be glazing fools?

Yeah, why you glazing on him? Or do glaze on him. You gotta be glazing him. Gotta riz him up. Every person I've known named Glazer, spelled it a different way. To some people, either spelling or not spelling, to like some people just goes by Glazer.

Yeah. Right. Glazer. Oh, I'll shout out Josh Sandoval at the Ice House. Yeah? Because he wasn't sure which one, so he put an S and a Z. Yeah, double dip. G-L-A-S-C-E-R.

I do G-L- I E R why not? Glacier. All right you want to do a story? Yeah. Send it by Kyle Andrews at late night nachos. We're going back to Clearwater. Oh take me back. Florida man disowns drugs found wrapped around his own penis. Wait a minute, those aren't mine. New penis, who dis? Yeah. Yeah, I have no idea how they got there. Yep. Clear water for you. As long as drug users have been wearing jeans.

Wrong dong, who dis? Cops have been hearing, these pants aren't mine. And finding narcotics, when finding narcotics in their pockets. These pants aren't mine Yeah, I haven't been below my waist all day They are my pants now a Florida man had to alter the time-honored lame excuse as authorities discovered meth and cocaine Packaged around the man's package my dick got hacked so rather than disowning his penis right?

Wah-wah, I love somebody who wants another job still having to do theirs, the suspect simply said the drugs did not belong to him. They're not mine. They're not mine. He could have gotten rid of the evidence, just like bend down over there, you know what I mean? Yes! Deputies of the Pinellas County Sheriff's Office stopped a vehicle that was operating

without its lights on around what time, or at what time, not even around. If you have drugs around your penis. Turn your lights on. There was something, a documentary or something much earlier. Right, like you should be doing all speed limit. Well no, they said this, this is what I said. If you're going to break the law,

don't get arrested for anything else. Make sure your taillights are working. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Make sure you're going. You use your blinker. Blinker. Full stop at a stop Oh, don't run the yellow hoping you make it before the red

42 and you're gonna break one law don't break any others those weren't his drugs though. Yes, that's not annual They weren't his drugs. What time do you think he was driving with his lights off? Come on friends 3 a.m.. 1 in the morning 1 Wow Now I'm gonna go 1030 4. 4am. Yeah baby. There's not enough other people out to distract from whatever law you're breaking. Where do you have to go at 4am? Right. Go another time. Right. There's more traffic. And she said baby. It's like when Brennan Walsh would pull the, remember he did the prank of Whole Foods coming to Silver Lake? And he also pulled the pranks across from the Virgil where he put the text messages up on the billboard.

They were like holding a phone and they wrote like, Dad's dad come home. And somebody asked him, when do you do that? And he said, middle of the day. Because people think you're supposed to be there. If you're there at a bad hour. Hey, what are you doing up there? Nobody's working at 4 a.m. You do it during the day.

I mean people are, but in that capacity. And if someone asks you what are you doing, you say I got the work order in my truck, do you want me to go sift through all my stuff to get it for you? Boom, boom. I got the work order is enough for most people to be like, all right.

Yeah, you just hold up any paper. He's got a work order. I got the work order up here. I'll bring it down in about an hour. Can you wait? Patrick Florence was riding in the passenger seat of the vehicle. Deputies searched the automobile

and discovered a gun beneath Florence's seat. Florence and the machine. As a result, they proceeded to search him. Upon searching. Florence and the machine gun would be a great. That's cool. That's a great all-male cover band of Florence and the Machine upon searching Florence They found the narcotics wrapped around his penis in two plastic baggies according to police work

I'll be wrapped around your penis As a person who takes people to another level yeah sure and as a we were recently on, we talked about drugs being a part of life. Yeah, during my opium selling days. Did you sell opium? I did. How difficult was that? Easy and a college town, the easiest. Southeast Missouri State, shout out to Cape Gerardo.

Easiest job you ever did? CMO. Probably. Southeast Missouri State, CMO. Cape Gerardo. We know it, the boot heel. But never, you're not hiding it, the boot heel. Yup. But never, you're not hiding it.

This isn't the option. Also, that sounds so hot on your penis. Right. That's so hot. Your little penis scarf? Yeah. Oof. I don't know, you trying to cut weight from that?

I don't think so. It's like a vision question. Also like heavy. Anyway. Florence stated the package wrapped around his penis was not his. Not mine. Deputy Blake wrote in the report, the suspect with the wrapped package is now facing four felony charges including possession of cocaine, meth, ammunition, and a firearm.

He's the passenger. Yeah. Wouldn't, is it, I feel like the gun very easily is like. That's not mine. Not mine. I'm just in this car. The dick is mine. Gun not mine. Love that song by Brandy. Yeah, thank you.

Oh, sorry. I went further back to Paul McCartney. Oh, the girl is mine. The gosh darn dick is mine. Mine, mine. The dick is mine. Mine, mine. Here's my thing. If you're going to say one of two things is not yours, say the gun, don't say your own penis. Or the drugs that are wrapped around your penis. How did they get there, sir? Now we're into that. Like the cop literally had to say how did they get there

if they're not yours. If it's not yours, how? Whose are they? According to a news outlet, the driver also was in legal trouble. He was arrested for DUI and possession of marijuana. I'm okay with one of those things. I could add if of here on this.

Yeah, well, wait, you had a question. Hold on, I'll do. What do you think if you had a couple wires in the glove box so that if you do get pulled over, you could throw a couple wires on your chest and be like, we're actually undercover, we're on our way to the end. There you go.

Do you know what you're breaking up right now? Yeah, right? You're in the wrong. Officer, can I talk to you for a second? Shh. It's on my chest. Yeah, yeah. You're in the wrong. Officer can I talk to you for a second? Or I'm so far undercover I'm never coming back right yeah, those guys McNeil then I gotta read that book. Okay, books amazing. How old is Patrick friends for ends up the guy with the thing we get inches to even though there might not be the answer I mean, yeah, 16

Inches to even though there might not be the answer. I mean, yeah 16 Three or four probably huge huge long huge long. It's not like it's with you know, that's this thing that he's that's all I know It's not mine. So short there for I would say plenty. How old is he? 23 23 38 25 that's a young man's game. That's a southeast Missouri State Cape Gerrard Albany 25 25 38 Yes, yes, you went Michael Jordan 23 Patrick Florence to end story number two is I gave you a hint 34 years old

He should know better I mean should know better Put it in you know what put it in he wouldn't be dealing with any of this if he hadn't gotten in a car with a drunk driver Huh good idiot idiot love the conversation brands got story three leading up to that give us a tease as to what is happening in story three if you can't I can't I You give it away. I don't want to give it away, but it's two people that Do something with a third person that is insane. Okay. Sex, dude.

Can't wait. There you go, that's how. Stick around! They wrap it around, there's stick around, we'll find out what Daniel's got going on, how you can follow him. This is just a, we're in this lickety split episode. We'll just stick around and see where it comes from.

All right, it's done, people come. Mike Laser with a Z is with us. I'm gonna do that. Stick around, make a sound, there's Dumb People Town. Mike Lazer with a Z is with us. We like that. Stick around, make a sound, there's more Dumb People Town. Hey guys, welcome back to the show. I am very excited to do this last story.

Get us going. Let's get it going. This is good. Do we have to do our promote our stuff? Let's plug our stuff that we have coming up on September 27th, huge show in Ann Arbor, Michigan at the Michigan Theater. It's like 1400 seats, it's huge.

We'll be there for alumni and family weekend. It's the Michigan-Minnesota football game on Saturday, Friday night, we got your plan! Come see us, 8 p.m. It's gonna be a great show at the Michigan Theater. Right downtown Ann Arbor, grab some dinner beforehand, come see us afterwards, it's going to be a blast! So we got that, and then we're going to Vegas

for the first time, we've never performed in Vegas before. I mean we did a corporate thing that Dan saw us struggle through. But we've never performed in Vegas, but we're gonna be in Vegas, I believe it's October 18th and 19th at Wise Guys Comedy Club in Vegas. Have you been there?

I have not yet. I heard it's beautiful. I heard it's amazing and I love Keith's stuff. So we'll be there and then fly over to Festival and Comedy4, supersclerers.com for all that stuff. And then if you're in LA, Largo, on the 9th of September, we're doing another Tag It, so there you go. Oh yeah.

You ready? Can I say two quick things? Yeah, sure. Also, our Patreon is so much fun. It is so much fun. You can send in a voicemail, you can send an email, you can tell your own dumb stories, you can send us stories that you just.

I'm gonna give you both. From pre-like 2010. So pre like 2010. So email is dptpod at gmail.com. Phone number is 213. 25 books a month. 213-839-8322. Leave them. Last question really quick.

Sure. Expectations for Michigan season? None, I've got none. I mean, I think they're gonna be good. I think. It's so unbelievable to be on the other side. I, in our lifetime they're gonna be good. I think so unbelievable to be on the other side. In our lifetime.

I want for nothing. We've never been on the other side of a national championship with Michigan. Oh yeah, it's awesome. So I think nine and three. Nine and three, 10 and two would be amazing. Would be incredible. Okay, fun.

Nine and three, 10 and two. Are you ready? This is sent in by Mike Moriarty. Moriarty at Tom Dinkin. Sure. It's really bad at aliases. Maybe that's like Tim Duncan. Maybe it's the reverse of Tim.

Tom Dinkin? Tom Dinkin is like a reverse Tim Duncan. Maybe he lives like outside of San Antonio. That would be Tim Donkin. Okay. That would be Tom. Tim Donkin is also funny. Tim Donkin is really funny. And why Tim Donkin is also funny. Tim Donkin is really funny. Sure.

And why Tim Donkin. Donk-on. Tim Duncan should be like. Tim Duncan donuts. And it's like a mix of Tim Hortons and Dunkin' Donuts. And it's really. Wow, great coffee, good donuts. Great coffee, good donuts, ready to go.

Here's the headline, you ready? Okay. Real estate agent accidentally burned down house ahead of open house. Oh. It was, did you guys guess what? It was a two bedroom. Ah!

Hey, what is it now, one big hole? It's a very open concept now. That is a bit of a fixer-up. Open plan. It's a project, Howie. A real estate. Really, you make it your own. Oh my God, a real estate actually burned down,

I'm not gonna tell you how much the property is, to the ground while preparing for an open house with their employer ordered to pay, and we'll get into it. How much I am. Where should I put the tiki torches? Michael? Okay. I pray to god this is not near the house. Brand new development or a model home. So what do you it's like somebody's you're showing someone else's house. Let's hope it was not that at all. So we'll get into the details of it. But just as I

read you that this I love to play this game. I love it. They're barbecuing. They're making some meal inside and they like they're cooking and they left the oven on or something. I know, Dan, this is very close to you too. So yeah, but but like fires happen and it's not good. But what do you think happened?

I think she was baking cooking or he was baking cookies. Okay. It's a common. Because you do bake cookies for people come in and look at the open house. Yes. What do you think happened? I think she was baking cookies, or he was baking cookies. It's a common. Because you do bake cookies for people who come in and look at the open house. What do you think happened? I, real quick, burned down my family's kitchen. What?

I didn't know that you couldn't make latkes and just leave the oil, and then it smoked, and then the pan caught fire, and then I grabbed the pan and then the drapes caught fire. No! Why are there drapes in your kitchen? Very question it is my mom's fault? Thank you Let's put the blame where blame is I think he will wood chips in the kitchen. Yeah, I think he 37

37 years old With a lock is good. Do you make good latkes solid pretty solid? I will say I think he set the mood with a fire and didn't open the chute. Oh, flume. Yeah, flume. Flume. But it could be a flume. It's like a log fire flume.

All right, you ready for this? Sydney real estate agent Julie Bundock Oh boy. was preparing for an open house in a four bed home on Sydney's northern beaches. So on the beach. This is in Australia? Yeah. When on the beach, you know, this is in Australia. Yeah. When she noticed bondi beach, maybe when she noticed the current renters of the house had left

some bedding on the deck to dry. You know how you just leave bedding out on the deck to dry. I mean, I guess you watched it, but why leave it on the let's light this small bonfire to dry this bedding out on this wooden deck. She removed the sheets and threw them in a downstairs room onto a shelf below a light, which she then switched on. Why? Oh, god. This is a science experiment. Why switch the light on down there?

If you're throwing stuff down. What's the matter? Leave the light off. About how many minutes later a major fire broke out in the four bedroom house? How many minutes later after she did this? 10. 10, what do you think, Dan?

That's a pretty good guess. Yeah. I'm gonna go 20. 20, what do you think? Wow, I'm gonna go low six. Low six, okay. One of you is exactly right. Me, it's 10 minutes.

You think it's 10? I think it's 20. You gonna stay where you are? I have to, but I think it's you. You have to. I mean, there's a guy who started to fire his own kid. He said he thinks it's me. Oh, he thinks it's you. You gonna stay where you are? I have to, but I think it's here. You have to. I mean, there's a guy who started a fire and said he thinks it's me. Oh, he thinks it's you.

I really do. Okay, fine. Get your answers in, Townies, because after about 20 minutes, Daniel. Oh, Daniel. The major fire broke out in the four bedroom house on Riverview Road on Avalon Beach, believed to be caused by the shelf and bedding keyed up

and catching fire due to the wall-mounted light. Understand what you're turning on. Understand what's near it. The house estimated to be worth how much money? In dollars. I mean, what I assume it's beach property. Beach property, four bedrooms, what do you think? 1.6 million, what do you think?

You go. Okay, I'm gonna go two, one. 2.1. Yeah. Daniel, what do you think? I'm gonna go two one. Two point one. Yeah. Daniel, what do you think? I'm gonna go four million. Whoa! Get your answers in, townies.

Four bedrooms on the beach? You guys circled it. You guys circled it. Three million dollars. Okay. Along with all of its contents destroyed. Which sucks, but no one got hurt. Sure.

That's how it goes. During high tide, it probably went out, right? Right, exactly. Yeah. The owner of the property. I think nature will take care of this. I've got the bet. This guy. Did you see that home? The owner of the property. Did you see that take care of this. I've got the best, this guy. Did you see that home?

The owner of the property. Did you see that home in North Carolina that got swept off the seat? No. No. Yeah. Just this past weekend. That's all gonna start happening. The owner of the property, Peter Allen Bush.

Is that just the greatest name ever? Peter Allen B-U-S-H. Sounds like all three partners of a law firm. Peter Allen, you just gotta put an and between. No, it's Al, Peter Allen Bush. Peter, Al, and Bush. You just gotta put an and between the. It goes Al, Peter, Al, and Bush. Peter, Al, and Bush. Who was preparing to sell the property, took the matter to court,

as did the four renters of the property. Of course. Who had their belongings in the set and the fire. So he owns it, and was renting it, and was going to try some. They all have damages. Oh yeah.

But they're probably like a little bit like, they have damages and they're upset, but they're probably like, screw this guy, Peter Allen Bush. It's his fault for putting a light on the wall. Also, why is he trying to sell the place? We're renting here. They're probably mad at him because they have a front.

How low is the light? I don't know. Or how high is the shelf? Or how high is the shelf are these sheets? The bedding. Oh yeah, the bedding. Also, don't you have a linen closet, bro? Yeah.

Right? That should be like a phrase. Don't you have a linen closet, bro? Yeah. Right? That should be like a phrase. Don't you have a linen closet? Yeah, she literally tried to. Just stuff it in this closet and we'll be fine. Mr. Bush told the court that after the fire, Ms. Bundock said, words to the effect, oh my God, Pete, I think I've burnt down your house.

Oh, well, Donna said that. He claimed she said in the presence of others, including his de facto partner, Lynn Emanuel. Is that what you're calling your girlfriend? Your de facto partner? Also, you know this old ball and chain over here, my de facto partner, Emanuel, who wrote Hamilton. Yeah, the Teemu version.

His name was Peter Allen Bush. His name was Peter Allen Bush. And there's another house he wished didn't burn down. Okay, so I've been doing some tidying up. I collected some sheets, drying on the veranda, and I threw them on top of a free standing metal shelf in the bedroom onto the stairs. Don't throw it on a free standing shelf.

Fold that shit up and put it downstairs. God, put it on a bed. I just threw them there, Pete, right up against the light on the wall, and I think that's what just threw them there, Pete, right up against the light on the wall and I think that's what started the fire. Why did you throw it against the light on the wall? The thing is, even if he's like, accidents happen, I totally understand.

I mean, he has to sue her. Yeah, she's incriminating herself over and over. And it's her company. You know what I'm saying? It has to be, they have to, like, it has to be made sure that he can't just go forget. Like, insurance is gonna sue her and the company judge

This is the best name for a judge to judge judge to Judy. That would be great judge Mike judge Why doesn't Mike judge have a judge? Oh called judge judge judge Hammerschlag It's getting better gonna bring the hammer not down drop the hammer Hammerschlag also ordered the agency to pay interest on the combined how much in terms of damage? Oh, because you have the renters and then you have loss of three mil.

Oh gosh. I'm gonna go back to four million dollars. Okay. 3.5 million. This is just the interest. This is just the interest. Oh, the interest. Oh, the interest.

Oh, which is the interest on top of whatever they had to pay. Half a million? Ooh. Yeah, the interest? Oh, which is the interest on top of whatever they had to pay. Whew. Half a million? Ooh. Yeah, I'll go 200k. Yeah, I'm going to say 350k. How about $862,315? Yo, that is so much money. From the time of the fire.

All right, the fire might be caused by pulling or throwing a bedding up against a burning light. It's obvious the risk was plainly foreseeable. This is what, hammerschlag, dropping the hammerschlag. And Boondock, she's out in the Boondocks, oughta have known this, he stated in a decision. You guys wanna see a picture of Boondock? Yes, I do.

Yeah, of course. Here she is. Oh, wow. Why would you do that? You're somebody's mom. I don't think she factored that in. I don't think she was like, fuck them't think she was like fuck them like it's Dan She threw it down if you said

Show me in the dictionary a picture of an ant someone's on Jessica like an ant. So you're right everyone's on She said she much like it ordered miss boondocks employer domain residential northern beaches. That's the real money laundering scheme Mr.. Bush seven hundred forty thousand six hundred forty two and the renters a hundred and twenty one thousand So if you're the renter and you're getting this stuff, I'm paying it off. Mr. Bush, $740,642, and the renter's $121,000. So if you're the renter and you're getting this stuff, I'm assuming if you're renting, you don't have great stuff. So, you know what I mean? No, I mean, come on.

Elise. You're renting a beach house. Yeah, that's true. Elise. True that. Elise Coulter, the Ann Coulter of Australia. Reggie Songella. Lauren Coulter,

no relation, just kidding, stop, and Ella Eagle, who I think should be Ella the Eagle. Judge Hammerstein ordered the agency to pay 862 at the time, and the thing, that fireman, because that's right, we did the whole thing, her evidence was clearly colored by a heightened awareness that she caused a catastrophe. She did?

Domain residents Northern Beaches attempted to argue that Mr. Bush and the renters also played a part in the damage that they did not inform the agency. The shelf would heat up as a result of the height of the light. So she's now saying that it's the renter's fault because they put a metal shelf where they shouldn't have.

You didn't tell me that the shelf was gonna heat up. It's like she's going against her common sense. That's what her lawyers, I'm sure, told her to do. Oh, they're gonna fight it. And Judge Hammerschlag rejected this suggestion. The submission is made in a context where none of the plaintiffs could have possibly or remotely conceived that Boondock might do what she did.

Yeah, you just, you were stupid. Fold it up and put it on a bed. Oh man. Good lord. There was no, throw it in. It's a dumb move. Throw it in and put it on a bed. Oh man. Good lord. There was no, throw it in. Dumb move. Throw it in the dryer. There you go.

Throw it in the dryer. Look, this thing is already working. There was no occasion. An LED bulb would also solve this whole thing. Thank you. 100%. That's so true. Thank you.

Her actions were the sole cause of the harm. They were told the news, toldnews.com. They did not wish to comment on the judgment. Ms. Boondock was commented for a contact of her comment and she did not. No, she didn't wanna say anything else. She's like, I already screwed myself once. I mean. What am I gonna do it again?

It is a hard thing business to be in. Sure. Selling houses and whatnot. You have a lot to worry about. She literally opened the house. When you say that I wanna have an open house. She opened it up. She opened open house. She opened it up. She opened the top, she opened it out, it all opened.

But what if they get to, and I'm gonna do this shining, what if everybody gets better stuff. Sure, sure. High thread count. High thread count stuff. This house is fire. LED light bulbs. This house is on fire!

And then the house gets rebuilt the way that they wanted to. Sure. I want this to have a happy ending With a happy ending massage parlor in the basement. Oh, how nice is that? Oh nice? Yeah, and she runs it There you go It's like it's like this thing took on a life of its own It's like you were here weeks pass by and then the third segment happened. That's what I love about this show.

Real quick, one last time, your show at the Comedy Store. Last Thursday of every month, Glazer's after party, Belly Room at the Comedy Store. So fun. Great time. Great time. Come see us do it, we'll do it. We're all gonna do it.

We're always gonna do it. And then watch DannyVeinCurt.com, SuperSuperHouse.com. We love you. And oh snap, we gotta get back to it. Stick around, make a sound, there's more to people's town.