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Skypains Avenue Hey townies, welcome to a Friday episode of Dumb People Town!
Population U!
Population J.
Morgan J.
Welcome to the show, buddy.
What's going on?
Oh, I love it.
That energy.
So here's what I love about you, bro.
Man, so Jay and I did that really cool show on the west side.
It was for Amazon.
Amazon, yeah.
So it was a film show and we were hanging outside and immediately drawn to you because of your jackets.
It was the best thing I've ever seen.
Amazing.
But then you went in and did your thing and I'm like, God, I love watching this guy.
I love watching you talk to the crowd, sing to the crowd.
Your improvisational skill as far as just being able
to take something that happens in the crowd
and make it fun.
I was like, Jay and I were both,
because we had to get ready for our set.
We had to get ready for what we were doing.
We stopped and were just mesmerized.
I just stopped and watched you, man.
Talent.
Isn't that so great to hear?
No, that's so cool because I've watched,
you know, it's, not to say you guys are old, but.
We are.
We know we are.
We know we are.
No, when I was starting, you know, I'm 35 now, but I was in high school.
I was watching all the presents and like taking notes like a nerd and stuff.
Of course.
Hey, man, it's so great.
So I love that we, here, we're going to pull that up right there.
Thank you, Aristotle.
The third Aristotle.
So here's the thing. Really? Yeah. It's amazing. Oh, I love it. Well, here, we're gonna pull that up right there. Thank you, Aristotle. Third Aristotle. So here's the thing.
Really?
It's amazing.
Oh, I love it.
Well, here's the thing.
The world's getting dumber.
I know you go down on the road, you see it.
It's just, it's dumb, and it only is getting dumber.
It's the only way we fight back is through comedy.
So our friends, our dumb boots on the ground,
send us stories.
So we have one right here.
Okay, great.
We'll get into, we'll take a break in the middle,
and then we'll get into what you're doing
and how people can support you.
You can have the guitar if you want.
In case you feel it and you're inspired
and you want to bring it into a song.
Yeah, I'm going to have it right there.
That was your call.
All right, so here we go.
I'm going to jump into this.
Who's it sent in by?
This story was sent in by Polite Menace
at Mongoose29.
That's new.
That's a new contributor. That's new. This is a new contributor.
It's a new Mongoose 29.
Just letting you know.
That's a new boot on the ground.
Mongoose 29 sounds like a dirt bike
you would have when you were 13.
What does it say again?
So Polite Menace at Mongoose 29.
I like a polite menace.
Yeah.
Death metal band, but he's nice.
Or a hip hop band that's acoustic.
That's right.
Come on, the Polite Menace?
Here we go. All right. So here is the, this is insane. old band but he's nice or a hip-hop band that's acoustic that's come on the polite menace here we
go all right so here is the this is insane this this story i love it so much here's the headline
okay parents sued daughter they abandoned as toddler for not buying her brother an apartment
hold on okay the parents Hold on. Can you read that one more time? The parents sue a daughter. This feels like an ACT question.
If a parent is coming from Jingpao.
Anyway, so parents sue a daughter that they abandoned as a toddler.
They sue this person for not buying her brother an apartment now that the kid is older.
Open and shut case, right?
Open and shut case.
They kept the son.
Kept the son.
Kept the son.
Abandoned the daughter.
You know it happened in China.
Yeah, it feels very China.
Right.
And so-
Is that-
I'm not super familiar with China.
It is China.
I'm not super familiar with other cultures, but it's on the responsibility of siblings
to buy each other-
Well, I think it's just this family.
Yeah, I think it's like a family.
Right?
Buy your brother an apartment
now like if my we could probably sue our own siblings for something sure I wanted
to sue him new if I didn't buy Jason like my parents our parents wouldn't you
know when they were when our dad was around like they wouldn't have legal
ground and they kept both of us one of us was abandoned and raised by wolves. Wolves.
Sorry, wolves.
The family is the wolves.
They live in the wolf family.
All right, here we go.
Chinese couple who abandoned their daughter when she was only a toddler suddenly reappeared in her life decades later when they learned she was well off.
How did they learn she was well off?
Are you following her?
Maybe she sought them out.
Maybe.
I don't know.
It's like when you dump a stock early
and then it starts doing well later and you're like,
ah. That old trophy.
What did I do? So to ask her.
Who knew Google would be big?
That's what we all hope for our exes.
We just want them to see us do it.
So they abandoned her.
They got rid of her.
Haven't talked to her in a while.
First thing you're going to come back and ask, home for her brother.
Get a home for your brother.
Wouldn't you, as the person who was abandoned, of the people in the family,
that is the one I would most like if I was going to take care of anybody.
It wouldn't be the parents.
Right.
Parents drop my ass.
It would maybe be.
You start with the relationship.
I'm not saying that she should or that I would.
Dan, you're saying sue her for not buying a house
for her son. He'd have the best
shot at getting it by generosity.
Who's older?
We'll get into all this in a little bit.
Buy your 12-year-old brother a home.
He doesn't need a home. Buy it for him.
We're looking to abandon him now.
We need to get a house for me.
Do you have siblings?
I have two older brothers.
Two older brothers.
So you would buy the house.
You're the baby.
Yeah, I'm the youngest.
What's the age spread?
What do they do?
The oldest brother is 45, 46.
So 10, 11 years.
It's weird.
You know when you're a kid, you're like five or six,
and then your uncles are like, God, how old are you now?
And it's like, how do you know how to count to seven?
Right, right.
As you get older, you're like, I don't know how old anybody is.
I don't know.
I think he's 46.
Yeah, he's 46.
Mid-40s.
All right.
And what do they do?
Are they funny?
Are they normos?
They're normal people.
My middle brother, he's 39, and he works for L'Oreal.
That's amazing.
He's still doing logistics.
That's cool.
I think he's in charge of like deciding how big the bottles are
to buy them from.
It's like very normal.
Yeah, totally.
You can curse.
Yeah, absolutely.
And then my oldest brother lives in Orlando and, you know.
Disney.
He's doing this and that.
I don't really know.
He's surviving Orlando.
He's doing stuff in Orlando.
Do they dig what you're doing?
Are they like supportive of you?
They're very proud.
They're very supportive.
Of course.
Like, you know, it's weird because my parents are immigrants they're also very supportive it's great and uh
there's no way they could have seen this as like a viable you know my my dad uh was actually a pop
star in argentina what no way he's like my dad is diego maridona So he passed away when I was a kid, and then my stepdad's a lawyer.
He's a retired lawyer.
So, you know, very normal job.
He was a pop star.
Did he have a hit?
He was singing, like, that surf rock music, but in Spanish.
Oh, my God.
So, like, you know how they had, like, you know the music where people were, like, dancing?
Yeah.
That's still me.
Yeah, yeah.
We're still doing it.
I don't have that mobility in my back anymore.
First of all, I love that he gifted you the voice because you have this beautiful, silky, smooth voice.
I'll say this.
I think anybody can sing.
Do you really believe that?
I do, and it's proven.
They did like a thing where you just did like some vocal work.
Look, not everybody can sing amazing, but everybody can sing.
So, Lissa, who is my partner in my production company company and she's not here today but her and i've
had this conversation all the time that there are some amazing singers that are amazing singers for
the music they make yeah and if you tired them to be to like play a wedding you and they were
doing covers you would go we want our money back totally but but for what they for their sound and
how they sing it is absolutely tom worth it. Tom Waits?
Nick Cave?
No, truly.
I went to theater school.
Sure.
But we had a class called Acting a Song.
And she was like, you don't have to sing the song.
Sell it.
You just got to sell it.
You just got to sell the song. I mean, that's what musicals are.
You got musicians who are great singers but not good performers.
Right?
And you're like, I'm bored watching this.
Right.
That was Sinatra's thing. He said, nobody's funnier than joey bishop we talked about the rap pack yeah uh dean
has the best voice right nobody has more talent all around than anyone in the world than sam
davis jr he goes but he goes but when i sing you believe it happened to me right and i do that
better than anybody's ever kindle wait kindler's obviously he had a great he had a great voice as well Sinatra but his you
literally did believe it was the wee small hours of the morning when he's
saying that Dan Kindler's joke Kindler's joke about I don't have to sing so well
I don't have to sing that well cuz I'm the neighbor's wife
Broadway but it's crazy because I don't even
think
I never thought I sang well
for a long time
when I started
because I was doing stand-up
for about six years
no guitar
no riffing
no that
yeah it was going pretty well
I started in New York
and then you know
I had a couple auditions
for JFL
and nothing like
and I was working so hard
on these six minutes
and I wasn't having fun
and then I was like
let me do the thing
that I do in life
that makes people laugh.
Let me have fun.
Yeah, I just do this for my friends,
and if I'm really going to do this,
I got to make sure I like doing this.
So if someone in your show said,
my parents abandoned my sister,
and they want me to buy them a house,
you would look directly at them and be like,
I'd be like, suspicious as fuck.
And that's what I say.
I have a whole system.
That's like my, I got to trademark that, but that's my whole thing.
That's it.
I sell t-shirts that say that.
That's great.
It's just like, I started doing that and then it just came out.
S-A-F, baby.
S-A-F.
Yeah, it could just be like a through line to the whole show.
Of course.
Oh my God, that's so great.
No matter what they say.
How old do you think she was when they abandoned her?
Said toddler.
Toddler, what do you think? Yeah, what do you think when they abandoned her? You said toddler. Toddler, what do you think?
Yeah, what do you think when they abandoned her?
Well, was this two?
You say two?
Two years old.
I'll say three.
What do you think?
I'm going to say right out of the womb.
Ooh.
Newborn.
One of you is exactly right.
I mean, there aren't a lot of areas you can go with a toddler,
but two years old when her parents decided that they couldn't raise her anymore.
Placed her in the care of her brother's
sister. They had little
to no interaction with her ever since
and the now...
They placed her in the care of their other daughter.
They placed her in the care of
her brother's sister.
Maybe the mom's brother's.
The mom's brother's sister.
It sounds suspicious.
It's a bug!
So we'll get back to how old she is now
her aunt's family
her biological
her mom's
brother's sister
is her
remember that old
like thing
that's why guys
my brother's father's son
and I can't decide
if everybody else
is super smart
and I'm super dumb
it's like an old
Chinese proverb
I'm very confused too
I'm very confused
placed in the care of her mom's sister's brother.
So basically, she believed that her aunt's family was her biological one as she was growing up.
She was raised by her aunt and uncle.
Right, and she didn't know.
Oh, so she wasn't like a bandit somewhere.
Left on a roadside.
They were like, we're not raising this.
So it was for this.
They were like a boss.
Remember we were saying, how did they know that she was well off?
So it was for this reason that she recently used part of her savings to help her cousin,
who she considers her brother, to buy an apartment.
So she helped her cousin, who she thought was her brother, to help buy an apartment.
However, she never anticipated that her generosity would suddenly make her biological parents come knocking.
These guys asking her to buy an apartment for her biological brother as well.
The Shandong Business Daily, which I read on the red.
Shandong Business Daily.
I have it bookmarked.
You're always going up and down.
Reported that Zhang's biological parents, who also live in Guangzhou,
demanded that she take care of their son.
That's my favorite Chinese province.
It is.
Guangzhou.
It's in my top five.
Yeah, they had kept, despite their financial difficulties,
when the young woman refused,
they filed a lawsuit with the local court asking for how much money.
How much money did they ask? U.S. dollars were gone?
And we'll take a break on this,
and we'll take a break on this,
and we'll come back.
Gosh.
How much money did they ask for in a lawsuit
because she refused to buy her brother,
actual biological brother,
who she thought was her cousin, but right.
I'm going to say,
because space, time, and money operate different,
and I'm going to say $50,000.
$50,000?
Jay, what do you think?
I'm going to say $110,000. Daniel? I'm going to say $50,000. $50,000? Jay, what do you think? I'm going to say $110,000.
Daniel?
I'd say $111,000.
But it might be under.
You said what, brother?
I said $50,000.
I said $110,000.
I'll split it.
I'll go $75,000.
$75,000.
Get your answers in.
We're going to take a break.
When we come back,
we'll find out how you can
just support Morgan Jay,
check him out,
and all that stuff.
Text 88174
to cast your vote cast your vote no we'll do that standard messaging rates apply all after the
break this is dumb people town don't buy it stick around make a sound there's more dumb people town
hey guys welcome back to dpt uh before we get into get into all things Morgan Jay, we are – Daniel, what wonderful things.
When is this dropping, Aristotle?
This is dropping –
I can never remember anything.
Probably soon, right?
Middle of December, right?
Oh, okay.
There we go.
December 16th is my guess.
Whoa.
Am I right, Aristotle?
I think I'm right.
December 16th.
That feels right.
It's coming up at the end of this week.
Yes.
There we go.
That means tonight, if you're in and around the Houston area, I'm going to make 16th. That feels right. It's coming up at the end of this week. Yes. There we go. That means tonight,
if you're in and around the Houston area,
I'm going to make it
worth your time.
I'm going to give you
an opportunity to make
somebody's night even better
or day in a few days.
I'm doing the
Daniel and Andrew's
Comedy Spectacular
Holiday Variety Show
and charity event
for the kids,
but only adults can come.
Santa's going to be there
and Alpha's going to be there.
Cam Franklin from the band The Suffers is going to be singing some holiday music. Santa's going to be there, and Alpha's going to be there. Cam Franklin from the band The Suffers
is going to be singing some holiday music.
I'm going to be dressed very dapperly.
Is that a word?
I'm going to be very dapper.
If you bring a new toy for a child,
your first drink is on me.
That is going to be for any single person who brings a toy.
Go to thesecretgroup.com to get your tickets for that show.
This will sell out.
The Houston area will be.
It's going to be secretgroup.com.
You know what it's going to cost for a whole big fun holiday show with all this stuff?
How much does it cost?
$10.
Dude.
$10.
And if you bring a toy, you get a free drink.
So literally-
We got you covered, Houston, tonight.
Bring a toy, pay $ bucks, you got a drink.
It costs you like $3 to get in.
I mean, this is the reason I love you, Dan.
You do stuff like this all the time and it's just good.
You're just a good person and we need that around this time of year.
Well, yeah, I just, I don't know.
I love it, Dan.
If we all did a little bit.
Also, you got a new regular show.
Can I just get a super off topic question?
Yeah, sure.
They do toy drives for Christmas.
Do they do toy drives for Hanukkah?
No.
No.
But they should, right?
They should, right?
They probably should.
They 100% should.
They should.
They should do it eight times as much.
That's right.
I'm going to look into that.
If there's a way to do that in Houston, we're going to get those there.
And then, obviously, in January, every Wednesday at the Lyric.
And then we're going to talk about it together.
But the night before the thing we're about to say together, I'm going to be on the 4th
at Sketch Fest doing the Risk podcast and stand-up.
And then the next night...
San Francisco, we're going to be at Dumb People Town.
Live Dumb People Town, Sunday, February 5th.
Jay and I will be in San Diego that weekend
before leaving up to it at the American Comedy Company.
And then two weeks before that,
we'll be in Denver at Comedy Works in Landmark.
You can go to superschoolhours.com.
Get all your tickets there.
Morgan J.
Get the tickets, get the tickets.
So people should follow you on Instagram.
That's absolutely... Instagram, TikTok there. Morgan J. Get the tickets. Get the tickets. So people should follow you on Instagram. That's absolutely.
Instagram, TikTok.
At Morgan J.
Yeah.
So Instagram, it's Morgan J.
And then TikTok, it's Morgan J Official.
And as much as I have a love-hate relationship with social media, it's honestly changed my career.
Well, it has because a lot of what you do is, I think, hilarious and postable.
And I think a lot of people would be turned on to it quickly because you see a lot of comics posting like I took down this
heckler yours is sort of like the reverse of that which is nice and I
built up this thing and you know I think the the energy I get when people literally
people tell me after shows like hey you know you poke fun at us but it feels
nice I don't feel like you know I don't feel like you know what I mean like well
when you do it in a beautiful song,
it's almost like you're serenading them with their own stuff.
It's like there's a beauty to it.
Well, with the crowd work stuff,
so I'm recording my special on Saturday.
Great.
Yeah, we're doing it.
Congrats.
I told you we're doing it here.
This is dropping on Friday, the 16th.
On Saturday.
Where can people get tickets here in L.A.?
The show's sold out
Damn it
It's sold out
But there's always a standby line
You never know
Well you know
We had like
Because it's in LA
There's like a guest list
Also the space is unconventional
I told you guys
We're doing it
The Village Studio
Oh yeah
Which is a legendary recording studio
Yeah
So the Village Studio
Run by
Jeff
Jeff Greenberg
Who is my
Step My stepmother-in-law.
Can I say that?
My wife's stepmom's brother, who I just saw on Thanksgiving.
Wait, so you're doing that this Saturday?
This Saturday, two shows, and it's about 60 people a show.
The room we're doing it in was built specifically for Fleetwood Macs to do Cocaine In.
Oh, hey, that's fantastic.
That's wonderful.
That's not too difficult.
Please make that joke.
I thought you were going to go
from Fleabag to Breakup with each other.
This was their breakup room?
And this was their music meeting.
This is where Chrissy McVie
and Lindsey Buckingham fought.
No, honestly, if you go to that,
so it really was built for them
to record the album Tusk.
Nice.
Unreal.
And so if you go to the space,
there's like little rooms
and it's super cool,
like all these platinum records.
What part of town is that in?
It's in West LA.
Oh, right off Sautel?
Or right off of Santa Monica?
Yes, it's right near Sautel, Santa Monica, right near the courthouse.
That's exactly where you're talking about.
It's a Masonic temple.
Yes.
Our friend Eva Kim used to work there.
Really?
Yeah.
I mean, Elton John has recorded there.
Everybody.
John Mayer has recorded there.
Snoop Dogg, the Beatles.
Snoop Dogg, the Beatles.
They started meditating in there.
Oh, my God.
John, I mean, everybody.
That's such a cool spot. I mean, they've all performed there and recorded there. It's a very my God. John, I mean, everybody. John Legend.
I mean, they've all performed there and recorded there.
It's a very legendary L.A. spot.
Dude, I'm psyched for this.
And so you're recording it, putting it together,
and then you'll just sort of see where it's going to go.
Yeah, I mean, you know, my manager will send it to all the streamers,
but I think nowadays, I mean, you guys know.
You might put it out.
I put my stuff out, and it's just like,
and I just wanted something really different and special.
I love this concept because it hasn't been seen.
Yeah, exactly.
So that's why I did this space.
So you'll tag us where it lands.
Absolutely.
We'll be able to let all these people love you.
I mean, I'm seeing for you a very, I mean, obviously you can do what you do in comedy clubs, of course.
But I would love to see you just out in rock clubs doing what you do all the way across.
And then just have that continue to grow.
Sometimes I book music venues.
Yeah, that makes sense.
So I was in New York.
I did this room called the Sultan Room,
which it was like in Bushwick.
It was honestly one of the coolest venues.
Amazing.
But also it was interesting because it was like,
because it's a music venue, half the crowd was sitting
and half the crowd was standing.
Right.
Because when we sold tickets,
I thought everybody would be sitting
when she was like actually.
Some of the people stand.
But it was fine. It's great, man. I think Bell House Brooklyn would be a good spot was like actually some of the people stand but it was fine
I think Bell House Brooklyn
would be a good spot for you
yeah
and I didn't
it's a great spot
this year has been weird
because I don't know
how many tickets
I can sell
and like for example
New York
I almost sold about 300
and I was like
we had to break it up
into two shows
that's great
so I was like
well we could have
just done this
at like the Bell House
well see you live
and now you learn
now you know
every city's different
we were in Austin
last week
sold 270 tickets
on Wednesday
Cap City Comedy
love it
love that club
new room
the new room
it was wonderful
was it awesome
the new room's amazing
the room is great
and the crowd was like
one of the best crowds
I've ever been to
I've never been to Austin
it's the coolest
we're in new territory now
because like you know
people are buying tickets
and are showing up.
And you probably made fans on our show, too.
You made fans on our show.
All right.
So here's what I'm going to say.
When we left off, we were trying to figure out how much.
How much did they sue this woman for?
Because she didn't buy house for a bonus.
$50,000 and $110,000.
$110,000.
One of you is $3,000 off.
Wow.
Do you want to house up or down?
No, I'll stay.
Okay, fine.
Here we go
they sued their daughter their biological daughter that they gave up that they think that owes their for one hundred and seven twenty thousand yen aka seventy five thousand dollars
seventy two thousand oh that is impressive the chinese court recently issued a controversial
verdict that sparked outrage in the Chinese social media.
It ruled that while Zhang had no obligation to give property to her adult biological daughter or otherwise, she was legally required to support her parents.
Why?
They didn't support her.
They gave her up.
I'd be like, which ones?
Exactly.
By the way, because you answered correctly, you get my guitar.
Yes.
Play it. God, I wish. So the verdict is quite average. I have something for you guys. Is it money? the ones you raised me because you answered correctly you get my guitar yes oh play it
god I wish
so the verdict
I have something for you guys
is it money
no it's a knuckle sandwich
pop pop
I'd be like
your honor
I have abandoned those parents
right so the
I've abandoned them now
right
with vast majority of comments
being critical to Zhang's parents
are they vampires
the father sucked up
the blood of his sister
and now he and his wife
want to drain the blood from their daughter.
All right, enough of the blood.
That's intense.
It's tremendous.
It's lucky that Chang didn't grow up in her family of origin.
Horrible, someone else commented.
Thank you for that comment right there.
Yeah.
But it is.
These guys do need.
So I don't love when the internet hates on people and crushes people.
This family deserves a little internet hate.
So let me, last question.
This is us.
Here's my question.
Is this just craziness in China, or can we just isolate?
That could happen in Florida.
It could happen.
Yeah, these people.
I think it's these people.
These people are like, when you're desperate and someone you know close to you has something,
you try and reach on.
I mean, we've all seen it and heard about it in our careers, where somebody goes, well,
so-and-so showed up.
I haven't seen them in 40 years.
Here they come.
They saw your new special on da-da-da.
No, really.
No, for real.
I'm sure you have a role to play.
It's funny.
The minute you start getting a little bit of money, all of a sudden the universe finds a way to take it away from you.
This poor girl, she's like a woman now.
She fought her way through this life.
Made something of her life
probably due to the rearing
and stewardship
helped out the brother
she was raised with
that's right
so in the end
she kind of
the abandonment
was maybe a blessing
in disguise
a little bit
in that
she probably had
a better upbringing
hopefully
well they wanted her
well this brother
who was brought up
by the other family
needs a freaking house
he can't do it by himself
he can't do it by himself
she's doing it for him. She like
got out of a bad situation. So she left a burning
building and went to a nicer place. She got
out of the frying pan and now they
want her to jump back into the fire.
Yeah, I was going to. Yeah, see? Out of the frying pan.
Into the fire. There you go. Into the flame.
Alright, there you go. That's it. That's the story
you guys. There you go. That's the show.
Morgan J. Support him. Keep an eye out.
Just follow him on social media so you know when the special's going to come out.
And we'll let you know, too.
And we're going to do a little Patreon with him as well.
But, oh, shit, we're getting back to work.
Dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb.
Dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb.
Dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb.
Dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb.
Dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb.
Dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb.
Stick around. Make a sound. Don't get down. It's Dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb. Stick around.
Make a sound.
Calm your down.
It's Dumb People Town.