Dumb People Town - Sam Jay - Peacock Joy Ride

Episode Date: August 11, 2020

This week Sam Jay comes to town and to hear about a woman who came home from her holiday with a permanent reminder of the trip. In story two, a man takes an unauthorized ride in an ambulance. In the final story a team of doctors make an unusual discovery while checking a woman's sore throat. 

Skypains Avenue Hey, townies, welcome to another episode of Dumb People Town. Population you. Population Jay. Sam Jay. welcome to the show what's up guys oh man this is so nice to have you here on the week this is when we're recording this but it'll drop next tuesday but the week that your amazing netflix special came out and we're going to talk about that later on in the show yeah i know you're feeling good about that you should be because it's brilliant um and this is the joy of doing the show via on this is obviously the unfortunate thing of with the

pandemic is that we can't be in person but it means we can get east coast people yes it's so good i don't know what the next time you're going to be out in la so this is even better we get a chance to do this and it's so weird that, we didn't just think about this before the pandemic, like, Oh, we can have people from across the country because it's just a podcast. It's a little bit because we want to feel important. We're like, no, we need to set a date. People need to come to us. It's so true. You know what the thing was for me? And I guess like a zoom invite is important. Like if someone sends you an invitation to do something, you're like, I better be there, you know? So it is important in that way. But to me, the thing was like, we needed to see people and we can see each

other right now. So like, as long as we're making eye contact and we can, you know what I mean? Like, so when you're sitting in studio with someone and someone's across from you, you can read their body language, you can toss them into the discussion, you know, because like we described this show to people. And I know you who have done some unbelievable writing in your career and have been in incredible writers rooms. This feels like a writer's room before you get to work. And so we thought. You gotta need that vibe. Yeah, for sure.

So who more better, who more perfect to join us today? So let me start by asking you this, because we ask all of our guests this, and I'm just curious to hear your thoughts on this. Do you feel like the world is getting dumber? Like since we were kids to now, or what? Or is dumb getting louder? Because you kind of deal with it a little bit in the special, that like there's some things that are happening that are just so stupid in this world right now. Do you feel like we're heading towards that direction or has it just been dumb all along? I think it might be that the dumb is getting louder.

Yeah, I always say it's never been more okay to be uninformed. Yes. People just let it slide. You'd be like, oh, I had no idea. And you're like, okay. You should know. People just let it slide. You'd be like, oh, I had no idea. And you're like, okay. It's like the people who like to like the old Chris Rock joke,

the people who love to not know shit, they're like the people now. They do the whole talking. The people who love to not have information, which is wild. It's an interesting time. It's like with drinking, I feel like interesting time there at that, but that's what I,

it's like, it's like with drinking. I feel like there, cause there used to be like the town drunk one guy I know on the corner. It's like, now everybody's drunk and there's like one sober person. And you're like, why are you not drinking? Like that's what we're asking now.

Cause I'm driving Uber. Yeah. Um, all right. So we get stories sent to us, Sam, by our awesome fans. Let's jump into one.

We have not heard it. You have not heard it. Dan has barely sort of by our awesome fans. Let's jump into one. We have not heard it. You have not heard it. Dan has barely sort of gone through it. Let's jump into one. This was sent in by Carleen McDermott at she be Carleen. Thank you so much, Carleen, for sending this in. I appreciate it. If you want to send a story in just a quick refresher for everybody at Daniel Van Kirk,

hashtag dumb people town. Facebook DMs are not the way to go. All right. DMs are usually the never the way to go. No. Just unsolicited DM is usually not. Sliding into someone's DMs. Right.

Does that ever really? So she slid into my DMs and now we're married. You never hear that phrase. I bet it's happened. Maybe. Okay. They say what happens on a girl's holiday stays on a girl's holiday i don't know if they say that is that true has anyone ever said that i don't know but i didn't know these were gonna

have like titles this is well this is the preamble yeah especially when it's an article from the sun they they they're good there's a lot of like uh british paper right yeah yeah they they so this is what what happens on a girl's holiday stays on a girls' holiday. But can we keep designating everything stays everywhere? You need a few places. If you want to like... Vegas. What happens in Vegas stays.

Sure. I've heard that. I've heard that. But we just can't keep saying it. Like everywhere can't be a place where it just happens there and stays there. I mean, it'd be nice. I mean, I guess that's how people would like it though, right? Right.

Yeah, exactly. But we all have phones. That was a pre-cell phone we all have phones we all have instagram shit's gonna get out okay well here we go they say what happens on a girl's holiday stays on a girl's holiday except of course when you end up when you somehow end up with a tattoo you have zero recollection of oh yeah that's a level of drunk i don't think i've ever been do you have zero recollection of oh yeah that's a level of drunk i don't think i've ever been do you have any tattoos i have a few but i remember all of them yeah you were present i was there yeah yeah that's not something that just you do in like 30 seconds i don't yeah i don't get like when people say certain types of things happen to them that they don't it's like you think she's lying. Exactly.

Well, that's the weird thing in this article. This person does remember. So I don't know why they even said that initially. Yeah. Anyway, here's how it goes. Maybe she doesn't remember how she got there or what were the events that led. Or why she made that choice. Well, one person who apparently knows a little something about this is Megan Garrard.

In July 2018, Megan went to, it's M-A-g-a-l-u-f mcgallif yeah yes probably uh went to mcgallif uh with six friends while there they made friends with guys from newcastle she said we got close with these boys and went out with them every night naturally when the last night rolled around the group wanted to do something to commemorate the holiday which is when the boys take a picture megan take a picture to get a tattoo of their initials now these people they just met you just met these people right they've been hanging out maybe two three night like a little spring break romance maybe yeah just having fun right vacation boyfriend vacation girl why does that need

to be permanently commemorated on your body because you're drunk that's right exactly so when the group the group decided that the they want to do something to commemorate the holiday the boys dared megan to get a tattoo of their initials. Quote, on our way to the strip, we passed a tattoo shop. And as a joke, I said, so she remembers. She remembers. I said, I will get everyone's initials tattooed on me. And then the boys dared me to do it.

First of all, is that a dare? Yeah. If you say I'm going to do it, then they. That's not a dare yeah if you say i'm gonna do it then they that's not a that's not a dare yeah she just she said that she was gonna do it and they just said okay right if you say if you say watch me it doesn't count as a dare no no it was already your idea right if you're like if you're a top she's already trying to shift responsibility and And I don't like that. I don't like it either. Own up to it. Let's have a fun little game here.

How many guys' initials do you think she got tattooed on her body? Five. Five. Okay. Jay, what do you think? She went with six friends. She went with six friends. So there's seven of them.

Okay. I'm going to say eight. Eight guys' initial them. Okay. I'm going to say eight. Eight guys. Eight initials. Okay. I'm going to say 10 guys because there's always like three extra dudes just laying around. You know what I mean? You're like, what are these guys doing?

So 10. Okay. So that's 20 initials. Maybe. Unless they use middle names. That's 30 initials. You know, maybe everybody was RGB-ing it on some level. For sure.

She said, I will get everyone's initials tattooed to me. And the seven boys dared her to do it. Nice. Very close, Jay. Seven brides for seven brothers. This is what it looked like, the tattoo that she got that night. Wow.

Jesus. I mean, that's a... It's not... It could have been smaller. Like, they gave their own space to all of these initials. So she did all of her girlfriends, the six of her girlfriends and these seven dudes. Yeah, I guess it's everybody. And these seven dudes that she had never met before. I mean, here's the thing.

Let's say if we don't throw any shade her way, maybe she is commemorating the greatest vacation of her life. That's what I was about to say. Maybe she just really wants to remember the trip every time she looks at it. She cries a little. You know what I mean? Yes.

Sometimes when she's super low, she just touches it. And she's back there. She she touches it and she's back there she's back there and she's immediately back in Mugulza. She can smell the rum the Malibu. I don't think you can put all those initials on unless all those people die. I think

Josh Adam Myers got a drunken Cabo tattoo. Did he really? I mean sounds like sounds like him. But guys I want you to see it. No Josh. Guys, I want you to see it. No, Josh. Like Josh. I want you to see my tattoo.

It's good. Come on, man. Look at this dude. Okay. Like the good friends they are, Megan's pals begged her not to go through with the dare. But she says she went ahead with it anyway. We know, Megan. She's telling this to the reporter, but guess what? I still got it anyway we know Megan she's like she's telling this to

report but guess what I still got it oh I know that's spoiler alert we're looking at it someone's so drunk that they're like I can't stop this and they're like no you can stop it you can walk out right now I can't don't you think you could though guys if the okay if all four of us were like just having the greatest Montreal like JFL of our lives, and I was like, I'm going to get it. Well, a comic might endorse you doing it. I'm just saying. But I was going to say, wouldn't you guys, you would be able to talk me out of it.

All three of you. I'm going to paint the scene for you, Sam. I wouldn't talk. You wouldn't talk about it. That's the comic part that I started to realize halfway through this. Comics would be like, get it bigger. That's too small. Didn't you say you liked frogs and mushrooms too put some guns on that shit meanwhile so i'm gonna pay the scene for you six girls are telling one lady to not do it

and she keeps saying but they dared me to which i would go no you volunteered the seven boys and dudes are saying do it you think and the people who work at the tattoo parlor are like this is money do it so she's up against the lot right right there yeah there's more people encouraging there's more people encouraging her to do it okay so like the good friends who are megan's pals begged her not to go through with the dare but she went ahead with it anyway jesus as if that wasn't bad enough, Megan realized that some of the boys had given her fake initials after she found their real names on social media,

which is how the group also discovered that they all had girlfriends too. Special weekend. Wow. Special weekend. This plot thickens. This is like the beginning of Magnolia where you start being like,

surely this can't be one of those things. This is like a fucked up drunken memento. You know what I mean? And a very real memento. That is trash. It's a trash thing to do. But these guys were like giving the fake initials and they knew it was fake.

But here's the thing. That's why something really bad's gonna happen to those dudes, because they were like giving the fake initials and they knew it was fake. But here's the thing. That's why I like something really bad is going to happen to those dudes because they were like doing too many bad things. Like they had girlfriends. You like got the slated to fake stuff on our body. Like here's playing too many games. Yeah, it's true. You're going to get caught. Here's the deal, though. You're on a trip.

You meet a group of girls you guys have a have a good time they definitely hooked up with these girls like definitely everybody got down whether you do or don't you have to put fake initials on i guess they've been giving them fake names the whole time so they have to create yeah initials then oh they don't want their girlfriends to right because k Right, because Kyle was already committed to being Neil. Yeah, they were already in too deep. They were in too deep. In too deep and the deep fake.

So they should have talked her out of this. Yes, they're bad guys. They're terrible dudes. I mean, for their own self-interest, they should have been like, no, don't, because then she's going to get fake. I know, man. should have been like no don't because then we're gonna get she's gonna get i know man and now that she knows who they are by their real names you don't think she's gonna find out just from their thing who all their girlfriends are and start messaging all of them i would i definitely would whoa wouldn't you just kind of lay it out wouldn't you be like weirded out if she was like let's take a picture and and they're all like no no no no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, These are terrible people. You think there's healthy relationships flourishing on Snapchat?

Snapchat is as disposable as you can get. There's so many reasons it's not. It's paper thin in terms of its substance anyway. But at this point. Yeah, you can't really get to know someone through a Snapchat. Also, everything on Snapchat is being done on Instagram. And it disappears in 24 hours, right? Right. So, like, who's initiating a new friendship on,

if you're still on Snapchat, it's like, did you watch tiger King? Did you watch the tiger? Yeah. Okay. It's like when Carol Baskins met the first guy and she was walking on the side,

Carol, she's walking on the side of the road and he pulls up and it's like, here, you can hold this gun on me while you're driving around just to make sure I don't do anything to you. If that's how your relationship starts, you are going to get killed by this woman. You started on the first night you met there. Okay. Vanya's gun.

If you meet someone on Snapchat, that relationship will disappear. Yes. It's like the nude that you sent. It'll disappear. Like the dick pic you said i feel like this was an old sword nick swartzen's nick swartzen bit but i think there is something about like you're not gonna see 40 years from now like to tell us how you met grandma and then it's like well she sent me her you know naked broadie on snapchat and then we but maybe but maybe i don't

know as long as i got the right name. She gave me a fake name. I tattooed it on my balls. Felt really bad. Felt bad about it. And then, you know, in the remorse, she nursed me back to health. Megan has since covered up the drunken tattoo with an intricate floral design. I'm going to show you that right now, Sam. I would say, yeah.

Can we see the new one? It looks very good. Here it Sam. I would say, yeah, can we see the new one? It looks very good. Here it is. Boom. Oh, yeah. That actually looks pretty good. It looks really good. I'm not mad at that. No, me either. She should be very happy. But that's a lot of work. That's a lot of work.

That is a lot of lines. That's a lot of work. That's a lot of lines and a lot of shading. That's an expensive triple tattoo. That's why I say it's expensive and also a lot of pain. That's a lot of work. a lot of shading that's an expensive triple tattoo that's why i say it's expensive and also like a lot of pain that's a lot of work a lot of pain that is where is it on it's on her leg it's on her right hip that could be her abdomen that could be a sublime album cover for all we know it is a lot of work and that shit is big it had to be big

because the way and you know what? Not for nothing, the tattoo artist is kind of a piece of shit too. Oh, for sure. The way it's all spread out, he could have just did some little thing. He didn't have to do it like that. He could have done like a grape vine, like grapes on a vine.

Straight down. Two rows. He decided to make it spider out all over her back. He or she made it really big that is yeah could have been just a weird rosary yeah uh that said megan claims she doesn't have any regrets about her tattoo no regrets which she said she covered up with the new design earlier this week megan posted a throwback photo of her tattoo which went viral and even allowed her this is another turn in this story so she's covered it up she's covered it recently posted this let's check out

what i did on vacation once which is how this went viral became in the sun and how we found out about it she says he added doing that even allowed her to reconnect with one of the guys in the group i know it you knew it you knew that was gonna happen she added we weren't in contact but i put up that tweet yesterday and one of the boys had seen it and replied to it as a joke i don't regret anything about it it was funny i'm gonna ask you now as of now how old how old is megan gerrard okay now you saw a hand and nails if you remember in the picture you also got to see a hip sam what do you think i think she is 36 36 years old yeah she's ready yeah that was a 36 year old hip but i don't know i'm gonna say she's 32 32 years 32 this happened like maybe two years i think she was 28 she's 28 28 yep okay we'll get out of our we're saying how old she is

now right now 36 32 28 yeah uh megan gerrard with the the girl with the flowered initials tattoo i love that i love that book. I love that book. We'll get out of this. Story one on this. She is 22 years old. She was 20! Damn. That's crazy. That's youth.

She did call them boys. Maybe they literally were boys. You never know. Maybe that speaks to how trash comics are that we would fuck up like that, that later in our lives. Exactly. Cause we were all like, way.

We're like, she's 50. Yeah, exactly. We're all emotionally 22. We're in arrested development. We don't have to grow up. That's how it goes.

All right. That's first story down in the books. We're going to take a break. We're going to come back and we're going to talk about Sam J's new special three in the morning. God damn. It's good. It is so good.

We'll be back right after this. Hey guys, welcome back to the show. Before we talk about Sam's new special, which is great. We want to remind people we are basically sold out for our live Dumb People Town on August 15th. Jim Gaffigan, Nowhere Comedy Club.

But if you have tickets and you want to come to the meet and greet ahead of time... Yeah, maybe you missed out on that post-show meet and greet. There's still about 30 tickets to do the meet and greet. And there's like seven group tickets. And we created that just for those people who missed out on it. So get on to it. Do it. And hang out with us pretty soon.

And we're going to hopefully announce the next one that we're going to do at that one. All right. Let's talk about Sam Jay's special, which I loved so much. There's so many highlights in this thing. I'm so proud of you. It is so good. Did you feel great? First of all, how so good did you feel great first of all how many times you shoot it when you were there do you do it twice or twice twice what let me ask

you this because having shot specials ourselves was there one where you did it and you're like oh that's the one and then you do it the next time and you're or you did the first time you're like it was pretty good and the second time you did you're like oh that's the one and then you go back in the editing room and you're like no no it was the first one all the way you know what i mean um yeah yeah yeah i feel like i felt like the first one was the one the first one was the one yeah the second one was like a lot looser because i was like feeling real good about what the first one was yeah so i was like oh i can kind of play around now you know what i mean see what comes up um yeah just see what happens you know what i'm saying yeah so we it's mostly the first we're in atlanta did you do it uh at the masquerade which is like right in the in the

underground so kind of right downtown yeah so cool yeah so cool i love the way this was shot who directed again you told us who directed it uh chris mercado just great and the decisions to edit it at the beginning with the music first of all you getting a haircut you looking up at the camera that was so good i loved it but as far as the comedy goes there were so many great bits i'm not i don't want to give anything away because i want everyone to watch it but i will say this and you'll be like, Oh yeah, I know what he's talking about.

The mummy bit just made me laugh so hard. The mummy observation about culture in the United States versus culture in Europe is that joke is one of my favorite jokes that I've heard in a long time. And I know you know what I'm talking about. Oh, thank you so much. Yeah.

I really think it's one of my favorite jokes, but it's like one of those jokes that you put in and you're like, no one likes this but me. And that's fine. Oh, no. Those are my favorite jokes in my hour, too. I think I'm the only person that likes this and I'm not going to stop saying it.

It is such... Here's why I love it. So here's why I love it is that so much of this special was your perspective on a lot of stuff that like it's your perspective on how you travel. You know what I mean?

And you're talking about being on a plane, which everyone's like, don't do plane material. That's not what it was. This is about you and your own neuroses and how you fly. you and your own neuroses and how you fly. You and your own, your, your shit when you go to a museum or when you travel with your partner and all that stuff is in so many ways relatable. And then at the same time, it could only come from you. That's what I loved.

loved i just it was one of those i just wanted it to feel like fluid you know i i was like really trying to figure that piece out like how do i make it feel like one thing it did and not like choppy like sometimes i feel like you watch a first special and it's just like here's my here's my best jokes these are all my material up to this point it is my best right but there's no like cohesiveness to it you know this there was and i was definitely trying to achieve that feeling of like let's have a cohesive yeah one conversation kind of um well i would in the trip just seems so right for that because so much happened and like you know it was it was the first time my girl had traveled that long together you know so just so much came out of it that it was, it was the first time my girl had traveled that long together, you know?

So just so much came out of it that it was like this, this jumping point that seemed to make these bridges to all these other things. And like in a real organic way that I liked how it felt. What I loved is, and again, we love doing this too. So you have a little bit of a spine of what the show is and then you go off and you, you know what I mean? You go off on your tangent, you're down in this little tribut over here yeah and then you just turn to the audience and you're like so we landed in london and they're like oh yeah shit we're talking about that and they all love

they got such a laugh out of you just coming back to the story which was great yeah i would that's a fun part for me because like that's when you're just in the groove of it you know what I mean when you're like okay I'm in it I'm fully in it you know what I mean and like you guys even forgot what we were doing but I didn't forget what we were doing at all you get a laugh on the construction just on the way you said it there were so many times throughout it I'm just going to tell everyone go go on Netflix, watch the special. If you're listening to this podcast, you love comedy. I'm telling you, the special was such a joy to watch.

I always look at things and I don't know if you feel this way. It's hard for me to watch a whole bunch of specials. It's just hard for me to do it. I can't do it. A hundred percent. But if it's people I love and it's friends of ours, I'm always like, I got to give this a look. And I really wanted to watch this one. I always look at the special and I say, did something special happen here?

It's called a special. You know what I mean? Like did- It just can't be a presentation of the material. Exactly. It can't just be, like you said, your jokes in order and whatever. I'm like, did something special happen? Was I taken away somewhere as this person is telling his or her stuff? And I really felt that. And that is hard to achieve. So I'm giving you all the props. And I really want everyone to check this out.

Check it out on Netflix. Give it five stars just so it stays up there and people can see it. I'm sure it's already going to do wonderful things for you. But I'm so happy for you. Oh, thank you. So good. That was sweet. Should we do a second story? let's do a second story you ready here we go all right this is sent by liz hagerty at liz hagerty thank you liz always appreciate you sending stories in here we go yeah uh flagler county florida that's in yeah i know where that is okay sadly flagler. A Florida man is behind bars after the Flagler County Sheriff's Office said he stole an ambulance that was idling outside of a hospital.

Like a Flagler is someone who like finds out if you've disrespected the flag and they show up at your house. You can't do that. Oh, he kneeled during the national anthem. Let's get the other Flaglers out here and let's knock him down. Stole it after it was idling outside of a hospital and led law enforcement and a multi-county chase.

An ambulance. I mean, that's opportunity right there, right? That's like a line that we shouldn't cross, right? Well, yeah, of course. First of all, it's already after the hospital.

I mean, I don't know. Do you blame the guy for leaving the keys in it and the ambulance on? I just think it depends on the situation, you know? Like maybe you need an ambulance. But also depends on the town. Maybe this is a quiet town.

Not a lot happens. You know what I mean? You take an ambulance. You're not really causing much trouble. And you're giving the cops something to do that day. Okay. The whole town gets a good laugh. You know what I mean?

Whereas like if you move into New York City, like someone might die because you did it. You know what I mean? And then it's like, right. They own it in New York city. Like you might, someone might die because you did it. You know what I mean? If you did it in New York city, someone's going to be in the back of the ambulance. Someone's going to be back in the ambulance. You gotta deliver them.

You have a passenger. In a small town, maybe they turn it into like a little festival ambulance day. Sirens. They commemorate it. Everybody gets it every year. There's a new person picked to steal the ambulance. Yeah.

And they hide it. Dave turned it into a taco truck. Find the ambulance. Yeah. The Daytona beach police department. I mean, I know that hopefully not not enough in florida but like things have changed but i forever whenever i hear daytona beach and police department i'm

thinking like constant issues with florida people yeah well it's like spring break right did you ever go to spring break down in florida ever no no i didn't did you i never even did a spring break thing ever black people go to atlanta yeah yeah i never did a single did a spring break thing black people go to Atlanta yeah I never did a single like fun spring break no we didn't really either the type where you get tattoos on your hip I used to watch it though like when I was a kid I would watch it on MTV

and I'd be like this looks like the life your MTV rap spring break was always the best one I was like this looks like the life like these kids are living. And when I'm old enough, I'm going to live just like that. You know, like, I was like,

yeah. Go to a beach party. Did our friend Dave Holmes ever do any MTV spring breaks? I'm sure he had to, right? Because he won that, or he got second place, but he ended up getting hired in 99. They were still doing MTV spring breaks. We had a on mtv in 97 and then we went you didn't get to go to a spring break we went out to the beach house that they were doing like palace

that was cool sam and i are lighting up i know we did that the beach house that was that was cool that's crazy so you got to go to the beach house yes to the beach house that counts in my book and we made them do a bit about how we showed up at the beach. This was the bit we wanted to do. And they reluctantly did it. But I thought this was super funny. We showed up for the interview and we did like about a 20 second interview. And then we said,

sorry, but we got to go. Thank you so much. I, you know, this is great, but thank you so much. And before we go,

here's a montage of all of our memories of being here. And then we did a huge like montage of us doing all these things. Of the first 20 seconds. First 20 seconds

and then we branched off and started doing all these other things. We were doing CPR on people. It was just a stupid sketch idea that we had and none of them thought it was funny.

Of course. And we thought it was hilarious. And they're always like, what are you doing? Wait, take your shirt off. Do you guys have that footage? No. Put that on Instagram.

You have the Sklars at MTV Beach House? Man, we are in 1997. 97, man. It's like a lifetime. Two lifetimes ago. I know. All right, so what happened here? Yeah, Daytona Beach received a call

just after 2.30 a.m. So bars are closed. Just closed. So what happened here? Yeah. Daytona Beach received a call just after 2.30 a.m. So bars are closed. Just closed. Yep. It shouldn't even be open. Tuesday in reference to a stolen vehicle at Advent Health located at 301 Memorial Medical Parkway. An EMT at the hospital told police she and her other crew members were inside the hospital working on a patient when a man entered the ambulance that was sitting empty outside this is where you're mad that it's a woman it's like i'm angry that this is a woman who was driving the ambulance because some dude who's like an emt is like way to go cheryl right oh yeah you know what i mean blame her i told you not to leave it running she told officers that the

front doors of the ambulance were locked but the back doors were left unlocked as they wheeled a patient into the hospital yeah because it's an emergency yeah they're pulling a person in they don't have they don't you don't think that i'm gonna need to secure this ambulance at the hospital right yeah no for sure you think people get that like if it's at the hospital it's for sure like needed yes or it's like home base of like a game they're coming right back another crew member so this is not're coming right back. Another crew member. So this is not the woman who was driving. Another crew member told police that prior to the theft, a man later identified.

And I, if we were an improv group and I told you this was my name for stealing ambulances, all three of you would say to me too much, too much. All right. What's the guy's name? A man later identified as

keith peacock no whoa keith peacock showing out i love his new streaming service keith peacock asked uh we'll see so how it goes asked uh him for a ride dan i know at daniel van kirk for that another crew member told the police that keithacock asked him for a ride in the ambulance, but he told him no, because they were in the middle of treating a patient, which means Peacock scoped it out. Right. And he was like, I asked. I said, yeah, they said, they didn't say I couldn't take it.

They just said they didn't have time to give me a ride. They knew I wanted to go in there. If you are the type of person who is asking an ambulance driver for just a ride you do not have a partner if you are look to me asking someone if you can ride an ambulance is what a four-year-old kid does for sure but also like if the person asked to ride in the ambulance then they'll for sure steal it yes that's the precursor right that's the half step they'll definitely steal it so you actually it is this precursor to take. That's the half step. They'll definitely steal it. So you actually,

it is this lady's fault because at that point you need to be on guard. That is very suspect. Yeah. At that point you're like, wait a minute. What? Let me take my keys. Let me put the club on it.

No. Right. Let me put the boot on it. It's like, Hey, Keith Peacock here. Can I get a ride in that? Lock it up. Let me put the club on it. No. Let me put the boot on it. Hey, Keith Peacock here. Can I get a ride in that? Lock it up. Lock it up. Roll them and lock them.

Lock them. Lock them. You guys are just going to leave it running? Roll them up. Lock them up, man. I don't give a shit. Lock them up. We're going to back over you first.

We're kind of in the middle of an emergency here, Keith Peacock. All right. Well, I'll watch it for you. You guys go in. Leave it running. It's like, you guys going up 12th Street? Like, nah, bro, that's not how it works this way. How many stops you making?

Remember that? How many stops you making? One. We're going to the hospital. Right. Remember that's the way you used to share cabs with people in New York City? Are you going up to the Upper West? I'm going here and you go there.

That to me was like, that was how good a friend you were with someone was how far the distance was that you were willing to go in one direction before you got home. And then you'd be the one who paid for the cab. Okay, so you're on the Upper West Side. I got to go to Greenpoint. Come on, just take me up there. And then you're like, Greenpoint, they just take me up there and then you're like green

point they should probably drop me first and you're like no no that's you trying to get out of paying for this cap and then it's um i'm super uh drop me off first you drop me off first that's a great way to be because i'm i'm always like tired yeah and i'm always like trying to get back to my bed so i'm like very selfish when it comes to that i'm like no no no you gotta get me first i'll actually pay to be dropped off first that's right i'll pay for the luxury of not having so I'm like very selfish when it comes to that. I'm like, no, no, no. You got to get me first. I'll actually pay to be dropped off first. That's right. I'll pay for the luxury of not having to be in the cab longer. Yeah.

But I love the people who are always trying to be like, no, man, you just go on the Upper West Side, then you cut across Central Park, then you drive down Fifth, and then you go over to the West Side, to the East Side. We know how to get to Greenpoint. All you're doing is making it sound worse

in terms of how we're gonna do this i wouldn't take it if you just gave me a right both the volusia and flagler county sheriff's officers were notified of the theft as peacock headed westbound on state right where are you going i love this too they go he headed anywhere he wants it's true with all the lights with all the. The doors are probably open. Shit's just flying out the back. IVs, gauze pads, needles. He's the only person who loved Scorsese's bringing out the dead.

He headed westbound on State Road 40 just past Hunter's Ridge. Who knows? I have no idea. That's whoever wrote this article being like, I'll start working you into the article. They got a friend that owns Hunter's Ridge. Here's 50 bucks. Just mention me.

Right. There's a brand new development called Caspian Court. There's a lot of reasonable homes out there. Anyway, he kept driving. This thing took place seven miles from Hunter's Ridge. What does that have to do with anything? Flagler deputies were eventually able to catch up with the ambulance, which was traveling at a high rate of speed along state road 11 no relation to how far that is no idea thanks funnel where they pulled peacock over as a felony traffic stop

the deputies were also involved in the pursuit which they captured on video with dashboard cameras the video can be viewed below i guess there's video in this article if you want to find it but they say watch out it has strong language but i'm sure it's like what the fuck are you doing get the fuck out that's right we're gonna put you in the back okay well but watch what would have you like saved three people's lives i mean they're like look we get it you are very good emt it's like an incredible first day for you, my friend. He's just yelling clear. Overnight, deputies responded to this. Oh, it's just wrapping it up here.

So, yeah, they eventually caught the guy and no clue as to why he did it or where he wanted to go, other than, like Sam said, just making a memory in a town. That's right. Yeah. He didn't get a tattoo of an ambulance on his leg. Jesus. That was a better tattoo than the initials.

Would have been even better. That's story number two. Can you give us a tease of what we're going to have here? I'm telling everybody who's listening, it gets a little gross. Okay. Gets a little gross. Sam Jay is with us. She's got a brand new Netflix special, Three in the Morning.

You have to watch it. It is so good. We've got one more segment. We'll be back right after this break. Stick around. Make a sound. There's more Dumb People Town. stick around make a sound there's more don't people town hey guys welcome back to the show uh dan take us home buddy okay this was sent in by liz hagerty

as well double dipping with the lh thank you so much okay everybody uh finish this episode after you're done with your lunch or save it for later a team of japanese doctors shared details of the case of a woman suffering throat irritation oh god who actually had a live worm inside of her tonsil oh good god yeah no thank you how does that get in there how does it get in there right well i don't even like those type of stories because it's like now I have to know that that can happen. Now you'll be scared. So now it's something I got to think about and it's wild. Because now you see.

Inside the Thompson. Inside the Thompson. So now you say to yourself. Like Nemo. My first thought along with what Sam was just saying is do I sleep with my mouth open? That's my first thought. Close it up. Some people have been taping their mouth shut when they sleep. By the way, your mouth should that's my first thought close it up some people have been taping

their mouth shut when they say by the way your mouth your mouth should be like an ambulance lock it up lock it up and lock it up turn it off and lock it up yeah cut to all the people who have sleep apnea with the mask being like hey i'm good yeah nobody's nobody's getting in when i sleep they were like bane um the doctor said in a study published in the july issue of the american society of tropical medicine i bet that has a lot of fun i mean you're just talking tropical medicine just people getting kicked in the face by horses and stuff by tiny umbrellas and every other page is like an ad for cocoa butter why not uh tropical medicine and hygiene that the 25 year old woman came into

st luke's International Hospital in Tokyo complaining of throat irritation. How many days do you think she waited with throat irritation before coming in to find out there was a worm in her tonsil? At least you can take your tonsils. I'll say a week. Week seven from Sam. I'm going to say two weeks.

And I think at least you can take your tonsils out. I'm going to say 42 weeks. At least you can take your tonsils out. I'm going to say 42 days. What if they were like, we got the worm. We don't need to take the tonsils. I'd be like, take it all. I don't want to give any housing. No more hiding places. I'm going to say 42.

I got to go. I would think babies. I would say left something behind. Stop it. 42 in honor of Jackie Robinson. 42 a week. I say two weeks. She came in complaining of a throat irritation five days.

Way to go, Sam. Sam, nice. After eating sashimi. And I love sashimi. No. The medical team discovered a one and a half inch black worm. That's not long when you're talking about your throat. I don't care.

I mean, I'm saying that's not short. That is legitimate. Living inside the woman's tonsil and the creature was removed using tweezers. Creature also makes it creature is like creature. It seems like it had met aliens. Aliens.

Don't worry, Sam. We're almost done. All I'm saying is watch Sam Jay's last bit in her special. I'm saying aliens. Aliens. Watch it. The worm, which was alive, so anybody who loves worms, don't worry, was identified as a four-stage larva of a word I can't pronounce,

which is a parasitic roundworm. The worms sometimes are found infecting the stomachs of patients who have consumed raw or uncooked marine fish that contains the creature's larva. Stop. So no sushi ever again. No, you can't do it. You can do it.

Just make sure you get it from a good place. Yeah. No street sushi. No street sushi. We're done with that. Here, I'll give you something better. No gas station sushi. No bodega sushi.

You can't do that shit. Cases involving the worms have come from Japan, the Netherlands, South America, and North Pacific countries. So I think we're good. Yes, unless they get their fish from there. Jesus. Yeah, but at least it hasn't happened here. Don't get sushi in Brazil. Don't get sushi in Paraguay.

The team said the woman's symptoms quickly improved after the worm was removed and her blood test came back normal. So also, if they got to go with tweezers, guys, you're going to be okay. But what if she's got, like, superpowers? I'm saying this... But you can never swallow the same again

because, you know, something was living in your throat. That's why you get the tonsils out. It's over. It's over for you. You remove the house from the plot of land by getting those tonsils out. It's over. It's over for you. You remove the house from the plot of land by getting those tonsils out. Dude, no, dude.

I think this could be an origin story. She becomes the superhero, the worm. The worm, worm lady. That's Dennis Rodman.

Oh, sorry. We already have the worm. It's Rodman. Yeah, we're good. One worm's enough. Okay, I'll ask you guys this. Of the cases that I listed to you,

how many cases do you think that this has happened? What is the total number of cases of someone having a worm in them from eating? In the world? It just says... In the year? Infections involving the worms have been documented in those following countries. With more than blank amount of cases, we're going to go with that least

number that they have there. What do you think, Sam? 100. 100. I'm going to say 1,000. 1,000. I'm going to say 1,000. 1,000. I'm going to say 250. Randy Sklar says 250. Jason says 1,000. Sam J, whose special is out right now, you better go on Netflix and watch it. 3 in the morning. 100. 700

cases in Florida. Oh, I was close. Also, you guys, you think percentage-wise that's also incredibly low. That is low. In countries we don't live in. Still. Still. it's 700 times that shit happened they flattened the world yeah they did all right that's our story sam jay sam jay i'm just gonna say go watch this special you will love it it is i'm so happy that we got you on this week the week that it dropped i can't wait till we see you and hang out with you, be it in Austin, Texas or New York City

or wherever it is. I can't wait to see people again. I know. Seriously. I look forward to that time. It's so, that's why the festivals are so fun for the comedians

because we don't ever get to be on the road with our friends because you're usually on the road and someone else is in another city. So when the festival happens,

it's like, oh wait, that means we get to perform and then we get to hang with our friends all night. All night long. Yeah, long yeah that's all especially people from other cities when you get to see like a new bit of theirs that they haven't done that's what i love too i love it i love it well hey so proud about the special thank you for doing this show and thank you guys every time oh shit we gotta get back to work.

Stick around. Make a sound. Hunker down. It's Dumb People Town.