Duncan Trussell Family Hour - 338: Tait Fletcher

Episode Date: May 28, 2019

Tait Fletcher, actor, nascent action star, Caveman Coffee creator, and uplifting, inspiring sweetheart joins the DTFH! This episode is brought to you by Audible (visit audible.com/DTFH or text DTFH ...to 500-500 to get a 30 day trial/free audiobook & two FREE Audible Originals).

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Starting point is 00:00:00 Ghost Towns, Dirty Angel, out now. You can get Dirty Angel anywhere you get your music. Ghost Towns, Dirty Angel, out now. New album and tour date coming this summer. Hey! It's the Duncan Trussell Family Hour podcast. It's time to surrender your own fallibilities admit that you like all beans and come before you
Starting point is 00:00:28 are fragile bubbles of synthians temporarily foaming on the surface of time. Tear off that stinky, malarial blindfold you call your personality and join the DTFH crew for their commute salute. It's time to die to everything you think you are so that you can smell, feel, and see color again. It's the Duncan Trussell Family Hour podcast! Where the fuck am I? Where the fuck am I? What are those?
Starting point is 00:00:55 Those fucking weasels? What the fuck? Help! Today we're giving a free coffin to our most cynical caller. Hi, hi, hello to all the new listeners listening to this episode of the DTFH. Wherever you may be, if you're deep in the thick of the thickest thicket if you're lost in the rotating gears of a massive cuckoo clock stuck in a maze inside a maze
Starting point is 00:01:24 in a box inside a wizard's laboratory or if you're somewhere back in time picking this up on a cut that fucking music. Tesla Coil, you are welcome here. This is your home. Unfold your seven layers and pull your soul out of that beautiful copper edged ornate orb you've been storing it in and allow yourself a few moments of sweet relief
Starting point is 00:01:48 the terrible burdensomeness of being a cork shoved into the pleasure node of time. And now to the traffic report with Jerry, the existentialist. First I just want to say that this traffic is a catastrophe today and every day it will not get better even if there are not back to back traffic in the city people will still be in the pursuit of a life of happiness which has been given to them implanted into dream
Starting point is 00:02:23 by the media which they now worship because of the death of God and religion itself. Only 101 we have a traffic jam of the divers who are apparently unaware of their own mortality and so feel perfectly fine riding in their symbols of death in a bumper to bumper traffic to get to a place they don't want to be in some pursuit of a dream implanted into them. On year 134 traffic is backed up due to a hell on collision
Starting point is 00:03:01 between an Uber driver and the realization that he is not an eternal being and thus completely meaningless and only five of the police are pursuing an outsider who has rejected the morality of society and is now on the run. Thank you so much for the weather report. Damn, sounds like you got some allergies or something. Spring allergies? Right, yes I got you.
Starting point is 00:03:33 Wow, today's podcast is insanely inspirational. Tate Fletcher is here with us and we're going to jump right into that. But first some quick business. I fucking love Audible and I love them even more because now they are sponsoring the DTFH. I literally could rave about Audible for the entire podcast. It's like, I don't know how to put it, it's like one of the luxuries
Starting point is 00:04:03 in my life because I can listen to books while I'm riding in an Uber, for example, or doing anything that normally couldn't read books doing. Also, if you sign up, Audible members get free access to the New York Times, Wall Street Journal, and Washington Post deliver daily to the Audible app. I just found that out. I had no idea.
Starting point is 00:04:25 I've been a member of Audible for years. With a convenient app, members can access Audible anytime at the gym while commuting on the go and on any device. It always picks up right where they left off. Audible also offers free and easy audiobook exchanges. Didn't know that. That's cool. Credits you can roll over for a year.
Starting point is 00:04:44 Didn't know that. In a library, you keep forever even if you cancel. Didn't know that. This is great. I had no idea. I've been a member for Audible for years and I had no idea that I could exchange audiobooks. That is badass.
Starting point is 00:04:58 Explore all the ways listening to Audible can help improve mind, body, and soul with entertainment, information, and inspiration. You can start listening with a 30-day Audible trial and your first audiobook plus two Audible originals are free. Visit audible.com slash DTFH or text DTFH to 500-500. Yeah, this is, I love Audible. I'll tell you what I'm listening to you right now.
Starting point is 00:05:32 Let me pull up Audible right now. This is what I've been, this book I'm so into and it is truly blowing my mind. Maybe I'll start posting what I'm listening to on Audible, but I don't want to do that because then you'll be like, he just regurgitates whatever he's listening to on Audible. He has no original thoughts, which is sadly somewhat true. I like to think I have an original thought here and there,
Starting point is 00:05:56 but a lot of stuff right now is just coming from things I read. I'm sorry. Yeah, I'm listening right now to, hold on, let me pause that. Chogyam Trumpa's wonderful audio book, which is called Shambhala, The Sacred Path of the Warrior. And the narrator is awesome. And it's just an incredible book. And it's not just about meditation.
Starting point is 00:06:21 It's about magic. And because Tibetan Buddhism is connected to shamanism. So there's a lot of like magical stuff in there. It's amazing. Pick this book out when you use our URL and definitely sign up for Audible if for some crazy reason you haven't yet, especially if you're someone who's getting that weird feeling that your soul is decaying like some rotting,
Starting point is 00:06:46 browning, yellowing tooth in the mouth of a sugar addict. I don't know if you've ever seen somebody you like eat sugar and then caught a glimpse of their just fragile, decaying, crypt-like teeth that are just crumbling in front of your very eyes. This is how I sometimes feel my soul must look when I haven't been reading a lot. And a lot of us, we're super busy. We've got our hands full and we don't have time to read.
Starting point is 00:07:11 So Audible is the ultimate solution because you can clean your house while listening to amazing books. So give them a shot. Please try Audible. Audible.com-DTFH or text DTFH to 500-500. That's Audible.com-DTFH or text DTFH to 500-500 and you will get a 30-day Audible trial and your first audiobook plus two Audible originals for free.
Starting point is 00:07:46 That's cool. That's cool. Some of these audiobooks are like 50 bucks if you want to buy them. So I highly recommend Shogun Trump. But very quickly, I'm sorry, this is a law commercial, but I love Audible. I'm going to list a few others that you should download. The fucking Dark Tower series is read by, I think, Frank Mueller. Or am I getting confused with the guy doing the investigation?
Starting point is 00:08:09 Regardless, the Dark Tower series, particularly the first three are incredible. Moby Dick. Holy shit. Amazing. They have this old Bhagavad Gita on there. I'm not sure I would necessarily recommend it as the first one you get. That's like a few credits down the line, but it's an incredible Bhagavad Gita. And of course, path to God's living the Bhagavad Gita by Ram Dass
Starting point is 00:08:37 and also experiments and truth by Ram Dass on Audible is fucking incredible. PS, they also have, I'm just going to give you a list. People are always like, what? What? Give us a book list. So here we go. I'm sorry. I know this is long, but I really do love Audible.
Starting point is 00:08:54 And you get a free book. This gets you actually gets you one of these books for free. So here's a few others that are glorious. Usually when I'm picking an Audible book out, I look at how long it is because the shorter ones not to ruin that you guys Audible, but the shorter ones are usually like three bucks. So there's no point if you're using your credit. Use it on something that's like super long and it's going to keep you busy for a while. The new American standard Bible.
Starting point is 00:09:19 I got the whole Bible on here. Dune. Yes. 21 hours of pure ecstasy, my friends. Definitely download that. I love that one. I'm scrolling through here for some other ones that I've really supremely enjoyed. Super intelligence.
Starting point is 00:09:36 Paths, dangerous strategies by Nick Bostrom. Narrated by Napoleon Ryan is really good. If it's kind of dry, but if you want to get into how, how crazy, uh, what's coming is really specifically AI. Try that. Holy shit. A short history of nearly everything by Bill Bryson. Narrated by Richard Matthews is amazing.
Starting point is 00:09:57 And this one has stuck with me for years. Genghis Khan and the making of the modern world is so fucking good. If you want to find out about the insanity of the Mongol horde, try them. And then, uh, cutting through spiritual materialism by Chogyeum Trumpa is there. I could go on and on. If you're looking for likes, I'm sorry, this is like a seven minute commercial. I just love audible. It's like a big part of my life.
Starting point is 00:10:23 I listen to audiobooks a lot. Living from the overflow by Michael Beckwith is really great. If you're looking for like a nice inspirational, um, visual, I don't want to call it visualization, but it's a really great book. If you're a little on the stuck side and okay, this is the last one. Uh, I'm just scanning through to find, I don't want to keep reading. I don't want to read every single one of my library here. Um, okay.
Starting point is 00:10:49 Here is, sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry. If audible folks are listening to this and you're like, oh, here it is. I was looking for in cold blood by Truman Capote, narrated by Scott Brick. That is another great fucking audiobook. It's amazing. It's dark because it's about murder and it gets in your head and it might darken you up a little bit. So I don't know if I, if you're looking for something, a beat that's definitely not the one shit. One last one, food of the gods, the search for the original, um, I don't know something.
Starting point is 00:11:26 I've always just called it food of the gods. It's fantastic. These are all in my audible library along with a shit ton of other books. So definitely, definitely give this sponsor a shot because they are worth every penny. Yeah. My darlings, we have, uh, a shop located at dugoutrustle.com. PS, if you are sick of these freaking commercials, man, sign up at patreon.com. Ford slash D T F H.
Starting point is 00:11:59 You will have instant access to hour long rambles that I put up there that are very embarrassing. And I'm sure in just a few months or even now, if I go back and listen to them, I might be mortified because I don't really spend a lot of time thinking about what I'm going to say, but they're all there for you. If you want to listen to me, go on and on about this and that. Also, you'll get early access to the podcast with no commercials and there is a discord server, which I have not visited in some time because I am slammed on a thing that I might not be able to talk about for years and years and fucking years. But I love you guys and man, today's guest. I don't, I mean, this is a cheesy thing to say and I don't even know what it means.
Starting point is 00:12:42 But I think this pot like he's, this guy's changed my life. He is such a sweetheart. And he always has this like up. He's got this vibe that like, it reminds me of Ram Dass or like, he's just like, he's really sweet and you get around him. You feel inspired and it's like, sometimes, you know, you get around people who are like super athletic and you feel, I don't know what the word like, like accidentally shamed or something. But this guy, man, he really makes you feel like you could do it, whatever it is you want to do. And I've known him for so long and I've watched his evolution over these years and it's just a beautiful thing to be friends with Tate.
Starting point is 00:13:25 Not, not just a spiritual evolution or whatever that means, but it's like evolution is an actor. I had one of the coolest moments watching Westworld and Tate appears. He's been on zillions, millions. It's been a millions, I don't know millions, but he's been in a shit ton of action movies. And I will bet that if there is a, like if they were to remake the old predator, maybe they're already doing that. I just know we're going to start seeing him as like the next big action star and he deserves it because he is an awesome human who also is an entrepreneur who runs an incredible coffee company called Caveman Coffee that makes delicious cold brew and a lot of other stuff too. So I don't know.
Starting point is 00:14:07 He's like, you can't really put him in any one box. He's just going for it, I guess is what you would say. So now please everybody rip your chest cavities open, pull your heart out behind your heart. You'll find a folded up little packet with some love dust in it. Pick that up in your bloody hands dripping with the last bits of life blood gushing from your open chest cavity and blow that splattering mess into the etheric plane. So it drifts up into the air becomes clouds of blood and rains upon Tate wherever he may be. Welcome to the DTFH, the mythical Tate Fletcher. I like that because when they're in their sense of discovery, you know.
Starting point is 00:15:16 Yes, man. That's it. And that thing, you know, the weird system that's in place where every single one of us has somebody that took us under their wing and helped us. And like when you get to a certain age, you have to become that person or you're a selfish person. Or it's and it's also chaos. I think about it in a weird way. I think about that like as far as helping later on in life. And I think about older, like I kind of gauge my life in a lot of ways off of what I see people 10 years down the road doing as an example.
Starting point is 00:15:49 Like if you're bouncing and you're 25, what's a 35 year old bouncer look like? Is that a life that you'd like to adopt when you see it, right? Because if you're moving your feet in those steps, you're going to end up at a similar spot, probably not dissimilar. And just looking at my life in that way, it became a really interesting tool to kind of guide and grow my life and go, oh shit, you better start moving your feet in a different way or else you're going to get this result. And I started to really look at cause and effect like that. But it's like having the right leader would be invaluable, like to have somebody be like, hey man, here's a space, create this thing. And like, I mean, with guys at the gym, we've done that as far as, you know, you go, okay, let's create a little coffee shop and then somebody can run the coffee shop and then they can learn new skills. And it's like this whole thing of life as skills acquisition, I've been kind of digging on and going, yeah, the more I can have a problem today, surmount that problem tomorrow or figure out how to wear it better.
Starting point is 00:16:46 I'm a stronger person on that third day. And how do I become more and more resilient for this life or more and more useful for the community, you know? I have a theory about that that is completely probable. It's, you know, I like to add woo-woo stuff to like sweeten up reality. Do you do stars? Not stars. Like the cosmos or no? I like the Ichin better than astrology.
Starting point is 00:17:10 Only because it's like in the moment, like in the now, it's showing some kind of readout. But not that the stars aren't doing that, but they're sort of, it's like the Ichin is like this based on kind of what I've been thinking about relating to what you're talking about, which is goal setting, achievement. And the, so the idea is because we can only see time as past, present, future, because the way we're set up. What would be other ways we could see time? Some kind of totality or some kind of alternate timelines. So like, you can kind of look at somebody and think, oh, okay, that every single one of us is pretty much the same. We have varying genetics and a lot of memories. We have different code or operating systems based on culture, experience, epigenetics.
Starting point is 00:18:06 But the computer itself is very, very similar, which is why we have brain surgery. That is universal in the sense that if someone's going to do an operation on your brain, they don't have to say, well, what kind of brain does he have? It's a human brain. We basically know how it works. So you can look at somebody like, all right, look at all the bouncers I've seen in their 40s or whatever the thing is in their 40s. Sometimes you'll see, oh, shit, it seems like that is a tough job and it has affected them in a negative way. So I've been thinking about this idea of like, what if goal setting is actually navigation and that when you set a goal and solve a problem, you literally move into like a different onion skin universe that is similar, almost identical to the one you're in,
Starting point is 00:19:00 but now is a little different. And the more you keep doing that, you begin doing a weird way ascend. And because I've noticed that the more I study one thing, music, for example, and the more I get really good, not good in the sense of like concert pianist proficient, it seems like other stuff starts changing. Everything around me kind of starts changing. The more I meditate, it seems like the more the universe itself is shifting into like a better kind of place to the point where I start thinking like, wait, is this some kind of like weird navigation?
Starting point is 00:19:39 Are we like literally jumping? It's like that idea that your whole navigation in that way, like you dispel chaos completely from your world. It's a personal responsibility. It's not like the state's job. We push a lot on the state or on government or on parents or on whatever your control system is to make life better. God damn it. This is untenable or whatever the thing is instead of going, no, I need ultimate responsibility and I can dispel my own cast. Like that's a huge superpower.
Starting point is 00:20:06 Yeah. I feel like it's almost one that like people, you got to you got to hear it from the underbelly of the world because those people on the top positions, they don't want people thinking in those, because you're not useful if you're thinking in those ways to corporate endeavors really because you're not a useful cog in that way. Right. If you're self-directed in that way where it's like, no, I can, you know, find my autonomy right here. Yeah. If you're, yeah, there is a, what's it called? I heard this anarchist term called being de-skilled.
Starting point is 00:20:36 So it's, you know, most people have this sense of like, you know, there's certain things where you think about it and you're like, I can't do that. And I can't so, I can't so much. Isn't that the danger of like welfare state kind of thinking in that way? I feel like that's the way like we've done a lot in reservations. We rob people of their ability for pride in a way by giving them such sustenance level. It's like, don't reach any higher than that. And then folks don't. And it's easy not to.
Starting point is 00:21:02 And it's easy to succumb to that almost. Is that? It's not just what it's like every level of one certain reality tunnel that a lot of people are hanging out in from welfare state to the super wealthy. There's this idea that luxury is synonymous with having other people do your shit for you. So, you know, like I was just at the last Ram Dass retreat and Bob Thurman was talking about how delightful it is to wash dishes. How it's so cool. Like you're, you're getting the experience of like hot water on your hands. The soap smells good.
Starting point is 00:21:33 You're cleaning the plates. You get this weird satisfaction from it, depending on where you're at. It's a great way to show someone you love them because you're like, no, I'll do the dishes. Also, depending on where you're at, it's a good way to get the fuck away from whatever's happening and be by yourself. But, but he was saying, you know, people take their dishes, shove them in the dishwasher, throw chemicals in there, turn the noisy thing on and completely lose the experience of washing dishes. But that's considered to be luxurious or that's like, I remember in my younger days, I'd go to someone's house and I'm like, fuck, they've got a. If you're in a wealthier person's house, they'd had different appliances than you got. That's right.
Starting point is 00:22:09 Yeah. And so, so like similarly, there's like all kinds of things that people imagine. Well, I, there's just no way I could do that. Like some people don't even know about turning their fuses back on. Some people don't know. Like if they're toilet. You set your garbage disposal or something like that, right? That exact exact, I had that exact experience and where the garbage disposal clogged, my wife and I were like, well, we're going to call.
Starting point is 00:22:36 Let's call the landlord and get a plumber or something. I'm like, wait, hold on, maybe. I didn't mean it in a condescending way. It just dawned on me like, wait, hold on, wait, there's maybe. And then Google found the thing about resetting your garbage disposal, went under it, garbage disposal reset. And it was like, whoa, I'm like Tim, I'm a hero for like six minutes, you know, it's cool. But these, but our go to is as someone else to do it. Right.
Starting point is 00:23:04 And that is robbing you of these wonderful dopamine hits, serotonin hits, right? Like you're, if you get someone else to do the job for you that you could do. You've also become more able. Yeah. Like I was just having, before I came here, I met with one of my guys that we meet once a week and and he was, you know, he was going over all the stuff that he wants to do for himself. It's like, I want to, you know, I want to be bigger. A lot of these guys are like, I want to be bigger. I want bigger arms or whatever you can relate.
Starting point is 00:23:36 Sure. And, and, and I go, well, do you want to be, how big is big enough? Like that's a huge, if that's a real thing and I'm to take this seriously, then let's be able to measure this. And, and I said, and what end is in that? Are we more useful for that? Or are we just assuaging our ego, which is okay. That's, but like it's important to know what we're doing and what the cost is. And if the cost is, is some years in time, if I could do something functional, like I could learn to wrestle or I could learn how to build houses and create my fitness that way.
Starting point is 00:24:09 Or I could learn how to rock climb or something else. You'd also have this, you know, you put four years of intention into that, man, you'd be a motherfucker with a skill set at the end of it. Or you're just another dude with pretty moose and the right outfit on doing arm curls at the gym with these, this arm number that you're chasing. Right. So I'm looking, I always look at like that kind of thing. And I go, how do I get most the most juice for the action that I'm doing? Cause I'm generally lazy. I don't want to.
Starting point is 00:24:35 I'd rather not is my, is the voice and my critic, you know. And so then I'm always like, well, like, I'm going to do this. Let's layer upon it so many things so that I have much more aptitude and usefulness in the coming selves that I'm going to manifest. Like, and I started thinking because I was thinking in my past, I was like, why do I eat? I'm not doing my future self any favors by behaving this way in this moment, whether it's eating something bad or, you know, hooking up with an ex-girlfriend or whatever the thing is. And then I started thinking really proactively about it. It's like, how do I make myself more suitable for the community by doing actions today that are going to layer on good experience so that I'm useful later? And that, and that's my highest place where I try to be.
Starting point is 00:25:18 That is a struggle to stay there all the, but it's like, that's what I try to look towards, you know, like a white house. Because that's the, you can, it's weird how lifting weights can transform and denialism in this weird way where you're like, what, you're in some sort of weird, like existentialist predicament, like Sisyphus, where, you know, you're doing this absurd, repetitive task. And you do start thinking like, wait, what, what is this here? And within that, you can hit this very strange, absurdist place. I imagine, I mean, I've, the one time I did go to a trainer and started getting in shape. I didn't feel, I hadn't gotten to the absurdist point yet, just because I was like, holy shit, my body can get in shape. And there was this rush and realizing, oh shit, my body's changing. But I love what you're saying because it's moving it to a level beyond that of selfishness, which is the moment you have a reason to do something that isn't based on you.
Starting point is 00:26:20 And is connected to everyone else, your community, your family. Then there's this, I don't know how to put it, but this fire, there's a fire in that that just doesn't exist. And like, I'm going to get muscles because I'm horny. Right. And I think girls like muscles. That's a very low level yet. It gets you in the game. It's like, I get it, but yeah.
Starting point is 00:26:47 But maybe there's better uses of utility that we could get towards, right? Like that's, I think the thing is like every kid wants to have money and everything or a title or whatever. You know, working with like a lot of 20 year olds, it's like, it's like that. But, but you don't merit the position and you couldn't shoulder the burden. It's like a lot of that time is spent, you've got to sharpen your sword and you've got to go ahead and build yourself. This whole thing of self development, you know, and it's really interesting because right now people, people without the consequences, people without the consequence of like horrific drug addiction or cancer or something like that are now going, no, I'm interested in self development just cause I'd like to get.
Starting point is 00:27:24 I'm not running from some horrific, you know, monster that's coming to get me, but I would just like to be better and more developed. And it's like, that's, I think the Ram Dassas that we get. It's like people are looking into that more and going, I'd like to get higher than this low vibration that we're all kind of living at too. Right. And that, and what's cool though is that in the Bhagavad Gita, when like Krishna is talking about the different type of people who end up like being drawn to God, whatever you want to call the transcendent. He says, the seekers of gold. And I remember a long time I read them and I'm like, what the fuck that's that doesn't seem like sacred or, but I think what that means is, everyone comes in to this specific temple of whatever you want to call it,
Starting point is 00:28:17 awakening, self improvement, becoming a kinder person for different reasons. And because we are monkeys to some degree, most of the time those reasons are self interested. You know, it's like you get in there and you're like, but you don't come to the temple already. You don't come to the gym in shape. Right. People don't come to the gym ripped. You know, they come to the, at some point you don't come to the guitar to learn to play. Yet we want to pay off for having endeavored.
Starting point is 00:28:51 Like I've tried and I want, it's like, you're going to have to stick with it and you're going to have to sit in pain and frustration for a while before you get the pay off. And then in that sitting in pain and frustration, something else starts happening. And that's what to me is so cool of having known you for so long is every time I run into you, you have become more in shape, but kinder. You know, every time I run into you seem a little sweeter. And it's like, and so to see those two things happening and then to hear your explanation for it, that you're, you know, it's, it all makes sense. Cause the moment you do shift over from like, all right, I'm going to get in shape for me. I'm going to get in shape to get the job, get the girl, get the respect. The moment it kind of shifts over to like shit.
Starting point is 00:29:38 If I get in shape, then people who are out of shape, who knew me when I was out of shape are going to see that as possible. And then also, you know, other things for me, like, you know, I had a, I had to quit drinking. I had a baby. I had to quit drinking. Congratulations. Thank you. But quitting drinking before never worked, I couldn't attach myself to it because I really didn't give a fuck. I was like, what are you doing this for kind of?
Starting point is 00:30:06 Yeah, what's, you know, are you just, you're like, there's what's what the dog's going to like, the dog's going to look at me weird or something. Cause the dog knows I've been drinking three beers every night. What have you been gaining from it? What have you been noticing that like, has there been a heightened clarity or what, what are the biggest differences that you're noticing? I wake up and feel normal. You know, and I, when, and it's, you know, my friend, Karen Kilgariff was saying on my podcast, she said, she's a murder girl. Yeah. Dude.
Starting point is 00:30:41 She's the coolest ever. Dude, that pot. My favorite murder is amazing. Oh, I know. Like they're, they're like, they're goddesses. I've never heard their names before. And then I'm like, and now in two years, these girls, I mean, I am so impressed. They deserve every little bit of it too, man.
Starting point is 00:30:56 They're so talented and the show is so good. Everyone loves it. So good. But she was saying, you know, when you don't drink, you know what's going to happen that night. You know what I mean? There's not some weird mystery about like, oh, am I going to like, am I going to be a dick or like it's something. It used to be. I love that too.
Starting point is 00:31:15 It's like, I used to love that chaos that it bring. I'm like, I'm in chaos. Anyway, fuck it. Let's spin the bottle. Let's take some acid, get a fifth of Jack Daniels and fucking load up the pistols. You know, and it becomes like, yeah. And if they come home empty and we don't remember why it doesn't matter, it was exciting. We're going to go to jail or we're going to become gods.
Starting point is 00:31:31 Let's do this. Yeah, that's right. And that's not healthy for a whole society. That's why we have armies. Those people at that age, they need to be somewhere. Well, yeah, man. Yeah. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:31:43 And but it's, you know, it's all, it's alcohol is just such a nightmare for society itself. But like, yeah, so you, what happens at some point is you begin to realize that your selfishness is beginning to manifest shit beyond just a weird morning where you're like, oh man, that was dumb. Not have just been drinking. You're more aware of the cost. Yeah. And when you have a family, you can see the impact, you know?
Starting point is 00:32:16 Like my dad struggled with alcoholism and, you know, just something clicked. I'm like, I'm not going to, my son is going to have to deal with the neurotic dad because I am, but he's not going to deal with, oh, how many beers did dad have tonight? Oh, is dad hungover? Or is dad making excuses due to his drink or tiptoe around dad because he's got a headache. He's been, or there's all of that stuff. I have to deal with a grown-ass adult that's supposed to take care of me that's denying the responsibilities to the truth of the world.
Starting point is 00:32:46 That is it. Annie Lamont says something beautiful about growing up in those families. Did you go up in that kind of family? You are taught to not see the truth because if you see the truth, then, and speak it, then the person who's denying what's happening to their lives will get so mad at you because they do not want to deal with the fact that they're the ones who are throwing the Molotov cocktails into every corner of their family. And also, they can't understand.
Starting point is 00:33:15 The alcoholic cannot see that their life is different than another life. The true and the false become interchangeable. They can't tell the difference of where the one begins and the other ends. And so it's almost like you're talking to a crazy person because they won't accept the truth as you're seeing it because they just can't comprehend it that way. I think about it often like when you're talking about crawling to the temple too for the seekers of gold. And I look at that and like what that could mean, you know? And because for a lot of people, they'll settle it silver also, you know?
Starting point is 00:33:48 And there's those things, those offerings, right? That we get along the road. Would a little bit of copper take you off the road while you're seeking truth? Oh, how about some ladies? Would they take you off while you're seeking truth? Is your attraction really to the truth or the trappings of truth? What is it that you're after? And that's a really interesting conversation, you know?
Starting point is 00:34:08 Am I after a result or am I after experience? Do I want to lay your experience upon myself or do I need a result? This is one of the people I study meditation with, he calls it sand traps. And it's like there's so many of them out there and everyone gets in them. Like there's no way to not get in them because you're like you're going to... If you start improving yourself. The obstacles will start to shoot up from everywhere. Inside yourself and your family everywhere.
Starting point is 00:34:34 Everywhere. And then when you get over the obstacles, so to speak, or the first level of them, then all of a sudden you do have to deal with the fact that like now you have... You have to deal with the fact that now you're beginning to realize like, shit, I didn't have more clarity than I've ever had in my life. And then because you have a little more clarity, when you see earlier versions of you and other people who are still kind of like, you know, whatever the thing is, fuzzy or whatever,
Starting point is 00:35:00 now there's an unfortunate power dynamic that emerges, which is if you're unscrupulous and you realize like, oh shit, this is a fuzzy person, you can like, this is... Somewhere in here, you start entering into like potential disaster, which is that you can become a guru, God forbid. And then, you know, and then that happens prematurely. So suddenly this is where we start running into people who begin to like, because they're magnetic, because what is more magnetic than a disciplined person?
Starting point is 00:35:36 A baby and a disciplined person. You're not going to run into anything more magnetic than that. It's just something in people's DNA. It draws people. It's like, holy shit. Oh my God. And then, so that's a sand trap. And then of course all the other stuff that goes along with it too,
Starting point is 00:35:51 which is probably somehow coinciding with your discipline, you start making a little bit more money, you start getting a little more success, and then it's like, oh shit, now I have access to that room, that room, that room, that room that I never had access to. You get, it's like someone starts giving you different passes to the incarnational festival of your life. And it's like, you are just a regular pass.
Starting point is 00:36:16 Oh shit, here's another pass. Now you can kind of get into like the VIP sections. And then the next thing, you know, oh, here's the artist pass. We're going to get you backstage. And then it's like, wait, there's another pass. What? Oh yeah, there's a backstage to the backstage. Right.
Starting point is 00:36:30 And every single one of those places has within it the ability to get completely. And the producer's pass. And all, and so there's all these different games in life, right? Like there's, I'm going to play the fatherhood game right now. And then I'm going to play the work game sometimes. And I'm going to play the sobriety game. And I'm going to play the hockey game.
Starting point is 00:36:47 And there's all these, you know, different kinds of things that we can endeavor. And I think in the searching, like in all those different rooms, you know, so you talked about my discipline, my discipline, my practice brought me to the party. And now the party's unfolding. And say, I could never get into the fucking party because I didn't have any discipline.
Starting point is 00:37:06 I'm just sloppy. Nobody's inviting me to the party. I get this discipline and practice. Now I'm being taken into these places. And so that very discipline and practice erodes, right? So the thing that took me to the party, I turned my back on because I'm like, now I'm at the party. And all I ever thought while I was in the grind
Starting point is 00:37:25 was that all we need to do is get to the party and then things are going to be OK at the party. And then you find out, you're like, I hope I didn't degrade my practice too much because I fucking need that to breathe. And the party is superfluous. This is just lights. This is a distraction.
Starting point is 00:37:40 And so it's like that thing about like my sobriety gets so good that it takes me away from the things that I need to do to maintain my sobriety, right? And so that therein is another trick. All of that stuff, you just got to, I think that practice is you just keep digging. You just have to keep digging and know that there's not an end.
Starting point is 00:37:58 Well, that's so funny you said that. So that's on the wall there. That was one of the Dalai Lama's teachers. And I was watching, I got obsessed with him for a little bit, but somebody asked him, what's the difference between enlightenment and money? And he said, money ends. Enlightenment, it never ends.
Starting point is 00:38:20 And what he meant is, you know, like money, you can run out of money, but enlightenment or awakening, it's not like suddenly you're like, oh, I'm there. It's like, it keeps... It's a resonance. You can maybe carry a resonance that you hope that you don't distort
Starting point is 00:38:36 and fall out of enlightenment, right? Which is the threat all the time. The thing is, you can't fall out of enlightenment because every single person has, within them, this is like one of the things Bob Thurman said that blew my fucking mind. Joy, happiness, pleasure. These are considered mini-enlightenment.
Starting point is 00:38:56 So like, whatever you're in a moment of like, whoa, that little thing, that's it. It's already in you. So you can't get away from it. So you parse up enlightenment into the specificity that comprises and that's beautiful. It's pretty cool, right? So then you realize you can't really escape from it.
Starting point is 00:39:14 So that moment, basically the way it works is there's inevitably that moment where you're like, oh, shit. Oh, shit. I got so distracted by that thing that I forgot about the main practice. I forgot about my practice. That moment when you're like, oh, wait. Oh, shit.
Starting point is 00:39:36 I was meditating. I was working out. I was eating, right? I was sober. So you first get interested in like self-reflection and awareness because you started this and when we're talking, you're like, you know, we all have basically the same operating system.
Starting point is 00:39:51 When we come out and we have these brains and they get overlaid with information and all that. And as if it's a, you know, not software, but like this is the hard complex that we're born from that we have as an operating system, right? Yes. However, you can control how aware you'd like to be, right? By putting your interest and curiosity towards things.
Starting point is 00:40:12 And not everybody does that. Right. And so in that way, we're very disadvantaged if we don't. And what was it that prompted you? I mean, so my thing is, are we all different people in a way? Why are some people so interested in looking at themselves and overcoming themselves and like, God damn it, please. I'm dying to get myself out of my own way type of thing.
Starting point is 00:40:35 And I'll take all the responsibility. I'll do all the things. I'll do what? Yeah. That want to raise their awareness versus people are like, things are pretty good, man. And I just went to Chipotle and just played baseball and I'm going home to watch a family guy.
Starting point is 00:40:48 Everything's great. Yeah. You know, I'm interested in what pushes people into seeking more or satiation. It's the biggest question. Because I've never had satiation ever. It's like if you were a cell, we could reframe your question to, hey, why does it seem like some cells are dividing in weird ways
Starting point is 00:41:12 that is causing like some pretty severe malignancies all over the organism. And some cells just want to divide in a way that allows the organism to be the most healthy. And it's this like ignorance is what it is. Because if the idea is that everybody just wants to be happy, everybody wants to connect with their highest self. Everybody wants to feel love and everybody wants to just feel at peace. And I think that's mostly true outside of like some people who are, I think, sick.
Starting point is 00:41:56 I mean, when I say like people are like, no, no, no, not everyone wants that. You can't apply some universal to humans. Everyone's different. There's like teen angst. There's stuff that you go, yeah, there's stages you go through and you get out of it though. And at the core, everybody would like to be useful and loved and what etc. I think you could sum it up like if you're looking at like in general, there's always outliers.
Starting point is 00:42:17 If I had a bowl of diarrhea, fresh, hot diarrhea. I'm not talking about you. You're an outlier. No, okay. You can see the weary. But if I took this diarrhea and I went to 100 people and said, Hey, would you like a spoonful of this diarrhea or would you like some ice cream? I'm going to.
Starting point is 00:42:37 My hypothesis is that 100% ice cream over diarrhea, 100%. And so this is because no one wants to eat shit. And a lot of people, they don't realize that they're eating shit. It's the good thing. It's because it's all they've ever, they were born and into a bowl of diarrhea. It's like if everybody beats you up in your house, you think that Johnny's getting beaten up to next door. You're like, this is how houses are.
Starting point is 00:43:03 That's it. And it's like, it's like that Monty Python, the Holy Grail, that sketch where the got the prisoners in the dungeon. I don't know if you remember this. And he spits in the other guy's face. He's like, Oh, spit in your face. He must really like you. You know how lucky you are to get spit.
Starting point is 00:43:19 It's like that where it's like people, the thing they're doing that to others might seem deplorable or so obviously. A microaggression. Yeah. Micro, all of it. It's just they, they're like, that's literally the best they could do. Right. Because they haven't seen that like, look, time is bigger than the five minutes surrounding
Starting point is 00:43:44 you. And the events aren't that big a deal. Yes. And also all my heartbreaks, all my failures, all that stuff. It's like, none of that shit was real. That was all, that was all a manifestation of my mind. I would be the architect of a disaster in the future that would never occur. Right.
Starting point is 00:44:01 This is going to be the end of it. And it's like, that was one of the big things is like, none of that stuff is true. Keep walking forward. Don't lose your fucking goal. You know, I mean, I just, those are the things that were distractions. I remember throwing a guy and fucking twisting and my knee went bam and the whole gym stopped. And I just, by the time we hit the ground, we're in motion. I thought everything is over.
Starting point is 00:44:21 This fight's over. Everything is over right now. And like that, that shit wasn't true or, oh, this business deal is going to happen with caveman or something like that. And this is, this is going to be easy street. And it's like, no, man, it's the same as all my spiritual practices. Duncan, as it comes down to like, what, just keep turning the knob to the, and you can only turn the knob so far every day.
Starting point is 00:44:41 There's only, there's a limit in what you can do. So you just go turn the knob every day. Don't leave a day without the knob not being turned, but go in there and just turn the knobs every day and fucking, and stay true to the thing that you're doing. And that's been the biggest lesson for me. A guy asked me last weekend and he goes, what do you do? What would be advice you would give your younger self, right? And I just thought, I thought about it for a while.
Starting point is 00:45:06 I thought, well, here's some cheat codes, right? I'll know the Lotto ticket by the time you're 19 or whatever. But I just thought, what would I say? I would say something to lessen the hardship of my life. That wouldn't be doing me any favors right now because those hardships are what grew character. They were, they're what grew resiliency. Like and perspective, right? Like through that, like through me being abused ever or oppressed ever or lifted up ever,
Starting point is 00:45:30 I know about those experiences. And then I can relate to, and I can go, ooh, they have it worse. And I have this nuance of discernment, which most people don't have. They look at judgment. They say, don't judge. And they go from there. They don't look any deeper into how useful judgment is, how we need that. We need this heightened sense of discernment.
Starting point is 00:45:47 And so I look at that and I think, what would I tell a younger self? And I think I would just say to try harder and to don't be scared to start sooner. Like I used to think, well, at a certain place you're not an adult until a certain thing or you wouldn't be available to do. It's like, no, do all the fucking things and jump in, man. Cover yourself in experience, you know, drowning in experience, man. Because you can't, you like, yeah, I love what you're saying, man. Like my son, it's like, well, this boy is so beautiful and I love him so much
Starting point is 00:46:18 that now when I think about the time machine idea, it's like, fuck that. I'm not doing anything. I wouldn't alter this. I'm not going back. I'm not going back to tell myself when I'm playing World of Warcraft not to put the fucking computer on my fucking lap that you're going to maybe get testicular cancer. Because anything that I change at all could potentially make it. So this being didn't come into the universe.
Starting point is 00:46:46 That is the most amazing being I ever saw in my life. And so this is the, when, but when you're in, but now that doesn't have to be a baby. Right. It could be a, it's your business. It's your friendship. It's your community. It's where you're at. But when you're in the turbulent area before you get some manifestation of good karma,
Starting point is 00:47:07 then it can seem as though everything's falling apart because you don't realize, oh no, you're getting sculpted right now. You're not getting destroyed. Something's breaking and chipping and like you're, you're the one who's like having to deal with the fact that as long as you've got that particular chip in your rudder, so to speak, your fucking boat's going to go in circles. And until you just admit it's not the ocean. It's not anybody else in any other boat.
Starting point is 00:47:37 It's not the wind. Even though maybe that's part of it. First change the fucking rudder. You have a chip in your rudder. You have your rudders warped. So your boat is like always going to like to the 180 degrees is turning. It's, you're going in circles, 360 degrees. So that, that like first that, and then that starts.
Starting point is 00:47:57 And then, but it's just by shifting over from victim to sculpture, you know, realizing, you know, you're not a victim. You're being sculpted. You're being taught. You signed up for this. Is this thing taking from me or is it making me stronger? That's a good question to ask. It's important to know that.
Starting point is 00:48:15 Yeah. Am I becoming anti-fragile as like Nasim talks about, like, whereas like when I, when I take the tumble down the steps, am I not only unbroken, that wouldn't be anti-fragile, but am I stronger for the experience? Yeah, man. Right. And that's what life is built to make us. That's the right way.
Starting point is 00:48:32 Yeah. But we shrink from that because that's the opposite of comfort, which we're kind of pushed in, I think through advertisements and corporatocracy really to seek comfort everywhere. And that is the same as seeking disaster for a life. Dude, you will never hear coming out of the TV on some public station. You're never going to hear like Sean Hannity or you're never going to hear like a reporter or the commercial say, you need water. You need a lot of water and outside the sun.
Starting point is 00:49:08 And, and, and, you know, just try to try not to eat so much sugar. Right. And, you know, you're, if you do that long enough, you're going to feel so good. Bye. Nobody wants to hear that. Or like, go break yourself. Yeah. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:49:24 You know, I mean, I'm, I'm walking with Harrison, right? Harrison's my friend. He just died, I don't know, a couple of months ago, 94 years old, beautiful dude. But I would go and I would take him out and I was like, well, fuck, we can be fitter than we are. And so we would go and we would squat and we'd move. I'd make him start on the floor and I would make him, I would go, okay. And I taught him a six simple step movement of how to roll to your side, draw your knees
Starting point is 00:49:47 up, roll over onto all fours, get elevated. You grab a chair stand. I'm like, yeah. And we would go through a thing. Cause I go, you're going to fall down and nobody's going to be there, bro. And then we would go for walks with the dog park and there'd be little hill upright. And he would start, I mean, and he's here, 130 pound, 94 year old man start to like, this could be it right now.
Starting point is 00:50:07 I could be carrying back a corpse and we pushed into that like that, but he, he would push into his own death that way and he would walk back after we would do whatever activity and he would be upright and he would be more alive. He would be more a man as opposed to this withering decay. And it just fortified him. And I thought, yeah, you push into your fucking death a little bit every day so you can push death off and say, maybe tomorrow, you know, and he did that for all those years until he's 94, like a G man.
Starting point is 00:50:35 I didn't meet him until he was like 91. So I don't know him for a long time, but I know the kind of heart that that guy, I mean, coming out of World War II, coming out of Detroit in the twenties, like the whole, I mean, it's an amazing, amazing story, but it just shows me more and more throughout time. It's like, you build resiliency, man. You go in and take in the horrific thing, learn to get comfortable where other people say no, then you're useful, man, because other people won't, they won't work that hard.
Starting point is 00:51:01 But that's also, you know, that's freedom. And that's freedom. Exactly. That's true freedom. Right. Because it's like, you know, people, people could have, we all, most of us, many of us have so much autonomy in the sense that you can like get up, you can leave where you're at, you can walk through the streets, I count on opening the faucet and the water comes
Starting point is 00:51:20 out. I count, I count on the waters provided to me. All that. Autonom. That's, but, but a lot of people don't realize that they're not free at all. And the reason is, is because they have so many conditions that have to be met before they allow themselves to be happy. They need hot water in the shower.
Starting point is 00:51:39 That's one man. They've got to have instantaneous access to water that's been heated before they're like happy. And by them, I mean, me, I've been like in a hotel where the, where I had a show and the like water wasn't getting hot. And I'm like, what the fuck, what the fuck, this is bullshit. What kind of. I've got a lot riding on this.
Starting point is 00:52:01 Yeah. The history of the world up until I don't know when hot water became instantaneously accessible to most, to at least people in the West, but the history of the world is you had to find a river or a well. And it wasn't going to be warm. And if you wanted to heat it up, it's going to take a little bit of time and fire. You got to start a fire. There's all this shit.
Starting point is 00:52:19 And so it's like, I'll just take a cold shower and you just did it. So, so that one, the moment you get to that point where you can look at the shower faucet and you could, you could, well, you could look and you turn the shower to ice cold, which I do. And I watch myself go from, okay, this is going to be it till like, you know what, maybe not today. You know what I mean? I'm like, okay.
Starting point is 00:52:45 And you look at your hand and you've pushed through and then you're like, fuck it. Oh, it's so great. So great. And you know what else is great? You go deeper and you go, you know what, I'm just here facing this goddamn cold water torrent. I'm going to lift my arms up over my head and I'm going to get under my armpits and all that skin and your ribca, and it's like, that's colder than cold.
Starting point is 00:53:05 And just to really give yourself to that, your asshole, I've been doing heat and cold therapy with this girl, Kimmy Moss, who works, she worked out a Laird's place and Laird Hamilton and they do a lot of that kind of stuff, but like 220 degrees sauna for 20 minutes and then like a 34 degree ice bath for three minutes. And then back and forth and woo, you got to come with me someday. I would love to. It's so fantastic. Let's do that.
Starting point is 00:53:30 Okay. My experiments in just cold water and a lot of breath work. She'll teach us a lot of breath work on the beginning too. But can it kill you? Like cold water is there's no, everything life is going to kill us, but out of, but is there we're going to go there to live Duncan, I know to live, but this is my question for you because this really has crossed my mind. And I know it's bullshit, but I just want my mom's 72.
Starting point is 00:53:56 She did it with me last week. I don't mean you're sought your hell sauna that I'm going to go to. I'm talking about, or heaven's sauna, I'm talking about my, this is how neurotic I am. My mind will tell me prior to turning the water all the way to ice cold. Yes. You could have a heart attack from this. You could. No.
Starting point is 00:54:14 100%. From cold water. I think when I go for a dog, I'm getting a cancer tumor in my back. I mean, the pussy inside of you is so strong, it will scream all kinds of lies to you about how this is going to be. No one's died from a cold shower. I don't know. I'm sure you can find a metric, right?
Starting point is 00:54:27 There's outliers everywhere. Who knows? I'm going to get in there like a G and I'm going to come out stronger on the other side of it. And if it kills me, God bless them. God bless them for being able to kill me for all the efforts I put to that end. Or you're going to die. I guess the way to look at it is this.
Starting point is 00:54:43 Okay, sure. You look into it and you go, I hope I die and then fucking dig in Duncan. God damn it. I mean, I don't want my son to grow up with his mom being like your father was so weak. If you rather think that my son, my, my father, he, he's so shrunk from life when it, when it encountered him that he's still safe and here with us. Or my father went out and fucking raged against life and he showed me how to stand up straight until the very day he died.
Starting point is 00:55:09 I love that. Except he's four months. Maybe there's more. And honestly, like if so, like, I want, when someone's like, Hey, how did your dad pass? Yes. If you have to pick, I want to be like, Oh yeah, he was hiking, a bear came out and he basically like gotten this fucking. He killed the first bear.
Starting point is 00:55:25 The second one he couldn't handle though, he's just diminished by that point. The secondary managed to gouge his eyes out, but he wasn't able to, he couldn't, he, he died in the, in the hospital. You mean the bear killed him. He's like, no, he died from over fucking because he fucked that bear so long. But what I'm saying is the thing I don't want my son to say is like, Oh yeah, my dad, he took a cold shower and it stopped his heart. We got to get you more resilient.
Starting point is 00:55:59 If we're in danger of that right now, we're going to, we got to turn up the volume a little bit because I don't want that to happen either. But how interesting is it take that all of these things for, for example, we, this is nothing to be proud of, but we only have one car and I'm not getting my own car because I ride my bike to work and I love riding my bike to work. And when I ride my bike. What about in the wintertime though, Duncan? In LA.
Starting point is 00:56:25 Oh, you're joking. Cold, kill me, one drop of cold water and I'm down. I understand. But isn't it interesting that all of the things that are not comfortable at first, not only do they help you physically, like if you start climbing, you're going to get in shape. If you start riding your bike to work, you're going to lose weight. If you stop drinking, you're going to lose weight. If you started taking cold showers, you're going to feel your immune system is going
Starting point is 00:56:55 to get better. But also all these activities simultaneously help the planet. Right. If you stop driving, isn't that, there's a seems to be the way it happens, our biosphere on the inner, the outer biosphere is encouraged also. Yes. Isn't that weird? Like comfort is not only potentially like this.
Starting point is 00:57:13 We're adaptable. Right. We're the most, I mean, maybe such rats or roaches or something where we're the biology with the most adaptation or to any organism alive. Yeah. Like we, we are, we are that walking evolution, living transformative evolution. So in that, I'm so arrogant also and self centered that I think that on a planet that varies a hundred degrees on any given day, anywhere geographically that I should be comfortable
Starting point is 00:57:42 all the time. Right. Yes. We put, we put golf courses in the desert. Yeah. And then we cry about that. There's a drought there. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:57:51 But what the fuck's going on Arizona? Yeah. Like what, why you got all the golf courses then? Cause I'm confused now. And so when, when, when looking at like all those kinds of things about like, here's what it is, my, my idea in my life and what I see to be helpful is that the more I push adaptation in my life, uh, whether it's muscle growth, spiritual growth, intellectual growth, like whatever, the more I push into adaptation of into unknown from what is known, the better
Starting point is 00:58:15 off I am as an organism. Yes. And that's the same. You're talking about with cold water. The more I become accustomed to these things that are outside of my, I can adapt and I can overcome and achieve. And in that I get resilient and strength. We're all looking for like, I heard if you drink a gallon of water, it'll kill you.
Starting point is 00:58:31 Well, like let's guzzle a gallon of water and let's see. I mean, because that sounds ridiculous, you know, and so like to push into those hard edges and, and to find that adaptation, it just makes me, you know, less fragile, which makes me more useful and more available for my people around me and less distracted about shit that doesn't matter. It's like, no, a bug bite is not going to kill you. Let's keep going. We got to get to water or whatever.
Starting point is 00:58:53 More free. It's more free. It's real free. You are the happier you become. That's the other thing, Duncan, is the happiness I used to think all the time was a fucking thing. They're just happy. I had no idea how hard people worked for happiness. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:59:07 I just had no idea. I was just so, I just thought less about it. Yeah. People fight for happiness. When you're, it's hard. It's like, if you take someone, I mean, just think how miserable, how easy it is to be miserable when you're sitting in the middle seat in the back of a plane and, you know, someone's shoulders are your.
Starting point is 00:59:26 From New York to California. Yeah. You're getting blown with farts. 250 pounds. And two inches. You don't have farts in you to battle back. That's the worst. You can't do that.
Starting point is 00:59:35 I don't mind if somebody farts, but if I got no farts in me. So you're compressed in this situation, but if you suddenly, all you need to do, it's so, you add six inches of leg room, two inches on the side, and suddenly it's the best flight of your life. So every time you, you realize like, wait, I don't need hot water to enjoy a shower. That's a permanent shift in your life. You are no longer compressed by that need because the need is painful. That's the main thing is like, for me, anytime I've.
Starting point is 01:00:11 The need takes me out of the experience is what I heard is that it takes me out and I have pain because I'm looking to seek my comfort. When I take the conversation out about seeking comfort, like, cause it can change five degrees and I'm seeking a new comfort. If I take that chasing the comfort out of the conversation, now I'm here for the experience. It doesn't matter if the temperature varies a few degrees or if it drizzles. I'm here in the experience. I'm not trying to run from the, from, from my lack of comfort.
Starting point is 01:00:41 My idea of comfort has changed. I, you're at this point, you're like, if you can get in an, in, in your Uber or you can get in your friend's car and they start playing some kind of music that drives you fucking up the wall and instead of being driven up the wall, you could just enjoy that music too. Free. That's freedom. Freedom is not being like, can you change that?
Starting point is 01:01:04 Dude, I can't believe you're not paying back in black, dude. What the fuck's wrong with ACDC, bro? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. When you're hanging out with your, with your girl, we're hanging out with your boyfriend and they want to watch something and you don't want to watch it, but. It's so nice cause right now I literally don't care.
Starting point is 01:01:20 I don't care where we eat or what we watch. If I'm with you, my goal is being with you. You know, it's like that. Yes. I get that from you, man. That to me is like the, what's one of the things that's so magnetic about you is like, you are such a yes person. It is amazing.
Starting point is 01:01:36 It's amazing. And, and, and like, you don't just get to be a, you don't get to be that and I don't mean yes person is, and you just, I mean, yes, in the sense of like, you are not in a constant struggle trying to arrange the phenomena around you to suit what you think you need because you seem to have figured out a way to, to, to enjoy yourself most of the time. Now I don't know what you're like when you get home. I don't know what you, like what we all have the shadowy glitches for a while. I thought, well, if the external is not right, then I'm not right.
Starting point is 01:02:09 And I thought, what a slave and a prisoner I am in that out, in that outlook. Right. And so then I thought, well, okay, so Tate, like the first time a guy told me, hey, look up the word serenity, you know, and, and, and I'm reading this book, search for serenity. I carry a 45 everywhere I go. And he's like, do you see that the, the problem here, Tate, you're looking for serenity and you're scared of everything so that you're armed. Like this is an insanity that you live in, right?
Starting point is 01:02:37 And at that point I started looking at it and I go, just because there's chaos amongst, amidst my life, all, all, does that change the internal balance? And so how do I get my internal balance right so that I'm not, you know, tipped this way or that way by external pressures? And like that, that was one of the things that I, because I, because it is, it's like being a prisoner. And I just like, I just, it was the same with cigarettes for me. I'm like, I just don't want to be a slave to this thing.
Starting point is 01:03:01 I don't want to be a prisoner. I'm not available when I'm a prisoner. And if I'm to fucking live, which I didn't want to live in, sometimes I still don't fucking I, sir, if I'm to live, I don't want to live as a fucking prisoner, man. I want to live as a free, expressed human because to not be expressed gives me cancer. And so like, what, what can I do to make sure that I hold the standard for myself like that? Because nobody else will. People will look to give you, to seek comfort everywhere.
Starting point is 01:03:27 You have to kind of, you're in a war against society. And maybe even those parts don't, they're just in a natural, they're just sale. They're in a salesman's shit position. Yeah. Just trying to sell you comfort, bro. I don't mean nothing bad by it. But to me, it's almost like the Nazis are coming over the hill and I got to gun them down.
Starting point is 01:03:43 It's like when I see salesmen like that, because I'm like, I don't want your comfort. Your comfort is fucking cancerous for me. And so I want to be very careful. Like, you know, it's like this dude told me a long time ago, he says, you can do whatever you want in life, Tate, as long as you pay the price. You got to be willing to pay the price and you better know what the fucking cost is. Because even if it looks awesome, there's a cost to that. Oh, did you fall in love and it's great?
Starting point is 01:04:03 Good. The cost could be all your friends. The cost could be you going after your dream job and going, well, no, this is nice too like this. And I'll start. And so it becomes a real question like that. You know, I mean, in my partners in caveman, Lacey and Keith is the same that like we go through those questions.
Starting point is 01:04:20 It's like, we've all chosen to lead our lives in certain ways and it's like, it changes relationships and the ideas of when you're going to start a family or any of those things because it's like, we have bigger fish to fry right now that we need to get after. And that could cost the whole thing that we've been trying to build right now. And so like, even though it's a beautiful thing, like, and not that that's a thing that's in the works or something. You're telling me that caveman coffee employees are not allowed to fall in love. Right.
Starting point is 01:04:48 You can't fall in love. You can't have goodness in your life. How do you measure that? What do you have? Like, you have some kind of satanic meter when they come in. It's just a crystal on a string and you just, and the way it moves, you got to, you'd have to be trained. Guilty of love, guilty of love.
Starting point is 01:05:02 Too many good times. No, but you know, it's like, to what I, what I allowed to distract me, I can't have everything. I can't be a greedy kid that's just like, I want that, I want that, I want that. Some of those things that I want cost the other thing. Now fucking tell me which one's more important. Which one do you have to take? Which one must you take care of? Because the other thing is, is I didn't want to create noise in the system and I see people
Starting point is 01:05:24 do that with, I mean, fuck, they do it with kids for God's sakes, let alone whatever else they make. And it's like, What do you mean noise in the system? In the system, like, ah, did you, you created a coffee company or you created something and then it just went into dust and nothing ever came of it or you create, you created a podcast that you just say and it doesn't really go anywhere and you don't really care if it affects people in a positive way or, you know, it's like, did you write a beautiful piece of graffiti
Starting point is 01:05:49 on the wall that like is real art that people can go fucking, they're kind of transformed by seeing that or did you just scribble your name and fucking cross out somebody else's like a dickhead? It's like, that's noise, that's art. It looks like writing on the wall, but it's different, right? I got you. And I think that it's like, you know, are you just here to create noise in the system? Because what is that?
Starting point is 01:06:11 That's attention seeking. And that's really what, you know, I mean, you hear guys like Gary Vee who's got a lot of great things to say and he's like, content, content, content, push it out there, get it out there. If you're fucking 19, please don't do that. If you're 26, don't do that. Get some experiences before you push the content content out because you'll be embarrassed about what you did and who you're making yourself to be by pretending that these things are
Starting point is 01:06:35 important. Yeah. You're going to go ahead and alter your character in a way that could disease your future self. It's fucking dangerous to have all this voice and not merit the fucking opinion. It's dangerous. My Freddie teaches me how to teach and says it's like, you don't want to start taking withdrawals. You don't want to start taking loans from your future self.
Starting point is 01:06:55 Don't start borrowing from your future self. It's a bad practice to get it to, and that's how karma, you know, that's basically what happens when shitty things are happening to you that are definitely your fault. And you really look at like when karma is reaching its fruition. So suddenly you're like dealing with the fact that whatever, you know, you're like the doctor and I'm not, you know, I don't want to. Is karma not the end state of cause and effect? Is it not the effect part or in that system or is it outside of that system?
Starting point is 01:07:26 It gets broken down to the most mind. It's gets broken down in the most like, um, what's the granular way? So it's like, there's different sorts of karma, right? So there's karma. Yeah. First of all, the number one thing is like, you cannot stop generating karma. Number one. So it's like in the same way that if you're, there's no retirement, there's no way to stop
Starting point is 01:07:48 ripples in the water. If you're swimming, you can't swim without ripples. You might be able to like make it so that there's a way you swim where you're barely affected, but you, no matter what, you're going to make some kind of ripples. You any, any movement you make, anything you do, you're impacting the universe around you, no matter how little that move, even if you stop moving, you're going to impact the universe probably more than if you do move it because people are like, he's catatonic. What the fuck?
Starting point is 01:08:13 Now we've got to like get him in a hospital. You're like, so basically karma is, works like there's the shit happening in the present moment to you right now. Like so because, um, uh, because I must have done something right in my interactions with you. I get to have you in my life and I get to have you sitting in front of me inspiring me and having this great conversation. So here is karma happening, which is like, I have a person I look up to who's my friend
Starting point is 01:08:43 that I can like model things that I want to improve in my own self. I can model that by looking at you in the same way you looked at the bouncer. So that's karma happening. And then the place we're in that we can't talk about, unfortunately, because of NDAs. Similarly, I get to be here because, because of karma and also, you know, similarly, uh, my feet hurt because I didn't get orthopedics over the course of a long time. You know, I should, I have like flat feet or like, I got, I'm overweight, you know, I'm always at like six to eight pounds over.
Starting point is 01:09:18 Thank you brother. And ride my bike with you. But still I'm always, I'm not, you know, I'm not, I'm not being myself, of course, but this is the effect of what your previous life has done. It brought me with this present just, you can look down at your body and like, you know, that's caught, you know, you know, I know what I was doing. I know I went through a period when my wife was pregnant, where I was buying these fucking ice cream sandwiches.
Starting point is 01:09:39 That's what you should do. That's the right move. Drinking booze, you know, and like, it's not a myth. So that's, that's, that's, but also there's others, there's other karmas. So there's this like the things that are kind of like the meteorite that's far away from the subjective planet you are that's on a direct collision course with you. That's karma that's coming. So that's rising karma, right?
Starting point is 01:10:05 And everyone, unfortunately, has that too. Is it soon? Well, it varies. It could be like that. Well that, so at that point, you become the alchemist, because the moment you start turning your meteorites into pull-up bars, so to speak, the moment your apocalypse has become gyms. Ooh, that's a great way to say that. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:10:28 Yeah. Then, then now you've like become like something else than a, you're not a victim anymore because now it's more like. Now you're a god, you're in creation. Your universe has gone from being a minefield to being the most sophisticated advanced training facility in the known universe. You could almost say that you've been invited into a kind of. That's fucking beautiful.
Starting point is 01:10:48 God training simulator and you're getting a chance to like. That's what it is. Is it not that? Is that not what we're doing? It's, yeah. I mean, this is one of the descriptions is it's a university. God, it's beautiful. That's neat, man.
Starting point is 01:11:01 Thank you. Well, thank you. Well, because you think it's like we have the term universe. Yeah. And then you have university. We're in it. We're in it. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:11:09 Earth school. Earth school. Yeah. And then in the moment that shift happens, I think you enter into a different dimension because for me, one thought experiment I like to do because when it rains, I take an Uber when I'm being fucking lazy, I take an Uber instead of riding my bike. But I liked when I take the Uber to do a thought experiment where I think the Uber driver is the Buddha.
Starting point is 01:11:30 And I'm lucky enough that on this day, the Uber driver is coming to teach me as the Buddha pretending to be an Uber driver and sure as shit, man, when I just by that switch, man, I've had Uber drivers teach me like show me like music I've never heard of before. Talk to me about like Buddhism in a way I've never heard about it talked all this stuff gives me scope of the world. I can't not talk to cabbies and Uber drivers to the point where if Dardin gets in a cat, I didn't know what he was doing at first, but we spent like a few weeks in New York together and he'd start, he'd start his camera, he's fiddling and he's not a camera guy.
Starting point is 01:12:07 He's not a phone guy. He starts fiddling with his phone every time we get in the cab and like second or third trip. I'm like, what are you doing? He goes, I'm just recording all these conversations you have with the cabbies because I'm just fucking I get so curious and interested and then I get to get a whole view of what Uganda is like, which I don't have any idea of, you know, and it's like these guys, they're the when you start out with where are you from, the kind of beautiful ideas when you're curious
Starting point is 01:12:33 about somebody's life and those guys teach. I mean, it is like, I don't, it's not unlike the Buddha, every car I get in, it's beautiful like that. That's nice. I'm glad I'm not the only one having conversations like that. I think that is, that is the truth is they are the Buddha and then so this is when you start playing with that concept of like going from is that in how you're honoring them. So you're, you're allowing that because you're, you're, it's like when we treat people like
Starting point is 01:12:58 they're highest selves, we don't allow them to act beneath themselves, right? And so in this way, we do a huge honoring when we honor somebody else's hires. It's really something I really try to be good at because I'm so shitty at like looking at somebody and going, they're doing it dog shit and that and to get that voice out of my, you know, is that this is such a nice alternative, which I need in order to supplant the more negative side. Well, and then when you add to it, that just doing that mind shift is a form of like hyper dimensional travel.
Starting point is 01:13:30 I love that idea. You do that and you can say shit like hyper dimensional and I even knowing what it means just cause it sounds cool. But the moment you start like, okay, I'm literally going to enter into the Buddha field today and every single person I encounter is the Buddha and they're being so merciful to me because they have all agreed to act in these like to do the most incredible character acting of all time, which is some of them are going to act like my enemy. Some of them are going to act completely ambivalent and some of them are going to act like they
Starting point is 01:14:01 love me. Some of them are going to act like my son. Some of them are going to act like my wife and they're all doing this to help raise me into awareness. And the moment you do that and you allow yourself the acting exercise of really living in that world, then suddenly magic starts happening. It's not like I'm going to pretend you're the Buddha, it's not I'm going to pretend you're awakened.
Starting point is 01:14:28 I'm going to pretend you're advanced because I'm going to behave into this. It's like I'm seeing this, I know who you are. You are the Buddha, you're the Christ, you have come and you've incarnated around me in the form of a society and I'm sorry I'm a slow learner. Teach me please, please allow me to bow to you even though the bowing or my show of respect to you is going to be convoluted by my own neurosis and ego shit and I'm not able to fully bow to you because I still feel like I have a little superior in this way or that way.
Starting point is 01:15:03 Once you start doing that, whoa man, the world, it's almost like for a second you will be in Shambhala. Well, it's like you ask people to step out of the material world. I've been pression enough to do something like that. It's an invitation into a spiritual realm where there's higher stakes that feel like ease and comfort in the way that we can express them and these ways that we wouldn't express them otherwise because we're like they'll think I'm weird or whatever we put on that. I think it's a fascinating, I like those kinds of things, it's like this thing of leave everybody
Starting point is 01:15:43 with a gift that I like doing, this idea about leaving them with a thank you or with the actual gift or even if it's just walking by somebody like that was a nice hat he had on. Leaving something with a positive gift even if it's just echoed inside my own chest because a lot of times the voice is that fucking guy, I wonder what he's doing and I'll have that thing where I'm suspicious or where I'm trying to think of some, what could the threat be that this person might pose to try to be devoid of all that stuff and that's one of the beautiful things.
Starting point is 01:16:14 I once spoke at this thing called Summer Strong last week and it's this thing this group Sornex puts on and it's fucking like 700 invited only people that come to this thing. It's like a big barbecue, weightlifting, this and that and I was like it's such a gift to be around super strong and able people in a way. It's the same way Jiu Jitsu gives me in that way is that when you are afforded strength, when you've built strength in a mass resiliency, there's no kinder people because there's no axe to grind. There's no, I'm not trying to posture or position or this or that.
Starting point is 01:16:46 We're all here in the try and we've all found it better if we're loving and kind with one another. What a fucking great way to be and there's those societies that are right here, right next to the society when you're working at wherever that is like, no, the system managers are dickhead to me and the fucking, when you're working at Best Buy or whatever the thing is, there's that reality but there's a whole nother reality in your same city that's also operating by these different rules, by this different ethos kind of right and you can walk into cultures that have been built like that and that's one of the beautiful things about
Starting point is 01:17:20 strength, about gyms, about meditation areas and all of these things, all of those places where we come to get beyond ourselves, we're looking for something, let us touch the gods in some kind of way, we're not looking for dissimilar things. That's right, yeah, that's right and those places, when you start looking at those places as outflow ducts for paradise that are like, people go into those places as one thing and they come out with a little bit of perfume on them from something that people are like, what's that smell? What's going on there?
Starting point is 01:18:00 And the person is maybe unaware that they've transcended it a little bit. Well yeah, usually because it doesn't happen all at once, it can happen all at once, nothing happens all at once. And God, we have this wonderful experience of time right now which is limited unfortunately or fortunately, I don't know, but we get to experience time right now so things don't happen all at once, but when I had to reschedule the podcast with you a few times and this podcast because of this thing I'm doing and every time I did it, you're so open and so cool with it, right?
Starting point is 01:18:34 And kind of just that really inspired me because I started taking that attitude and thinking like, what is that? This thing he's doing which is so sweet and so authentically giving and compassionate to my situation and I'm thinking, man, this makes me feel so good and it makes me love and more. And that's just a reflection of you, man. Well, but that's the impact that you start having on people where you like suddenly But I couldn't be that without you also.
Starting point is 01:19:12 That's the impact you have on me. I mean, there's this synergy of that in that way because I couldn't like, yeah, but I also know you, your attention to discipline and all these things and like your hierarchy and what they are like, I respect you and your process to such a great degree and I've known you now, you know, for deck, you know, over decades, like we're looking at like time and and I see you, you know, so how else could I be but that in that way? That's cool, man. I mean, and this is where you end up.
Starting point is 01:19:47 I think fine, you know, you end up experiencing a continuum with your friends or your life. And when you realize that that continuum is one where you look around, your friends are successful and are healthier. You realize like, oh, cool. There's some kind of ascent happening here and there's and there's something really beautiful in that. And then when you see that maybe one of your friends is something's there amiss, then there's a way to to like maybe help that help pull them into the dimension that you you're you're
Starting point is 01:20:23 currently in. And that by that, I mean like the part of the multiverse where you're beginning to wake up a little bit, which you everyone is to some degree. So this is the spiritual community. This is the whatever it is that you're doing, you know, what's interesting to that I noticed and if somebody is listening like what I find, because a lot of people are looking for things, you know, we you and I are fortunate men in a thousand ways and we we don't have enough time to enumerate those things and I know you like I know that's true and that you feel
Starting point is 01:20:53 that way. But in this too, I think I think about our group of of of friends in common that we have. And it's the same in groups in Jiu Jitsu or in MMA world to me or in CrossFit or in all these in different endeavors, whatever it is, writing. If you got a group of core people, you know, it's self selecting guys. And so the thing is, is to the degree that you're in the game of life, you're in the flow, well, then you're in that group. And the minute that I step out of that flow, and I go, you know what, I'd like to, I'd
Starting point is 01:21:28 like to rest on my laurels, which I'd like to do a lot of the time, I'd like to sit idle. Yeah. I'm no longer in the conversation with with with with you or Rogan or Ari or Brian or anybody because I've chosen to be out of the flow. Yeah. And then I go, oh, and I'm lonely and I'm alone. And I'm the, I chose that. And so this ultimate responsibility of really fucking taking full accountability for my
Starting point is 01:21:53 life is like, I choose my misery or my happiness by the kind of work in action that I'm willing to put out. And I love this phrase. This guy always would remind me, he says, you can't think your way into right action, but you can act your way into right thinking. And that kind of thing. It's like, you know, I, this is self selecting based upon my behaviors, you know, and, and so I think you can get in the stream anywhere.
Starting point is 01:22:17 And if there doesn't seem to be a stream where you're at, fucking make a stream, you know, build one. Cause I, the one thing that really bums me out when I hear on the internet and I see a thing and like, I've got some friends that are the tempest free runners and these guys at tempest are the best free runners. They're the best parkour guys and trickers in the world. They're fantastic. And I posted a video of them once and somebody from my hometown is like, dude, where the
Starting point is 01:22:38 fuck were guys like that when we were kids? How awesome would that have been? And instantly I'm fucking, where the fuck are you right now for the kids around you? You cocksucker. If you see this to be a valuable thing that was lacking for you and you don't try to create that for others, you're a certain type of motherfucker. You know? And so in this thing, it's like, you know, as we grow, right?
Starting point is 01:23:00 I, I age out of youth, it just happens, you know, all these motherfuckers going, when are you going to grow up? Well, unfortunately it just occurs, uh, unfortunately, but then, then here you are, but like, how have you developed yourself up until that growth? And now, you know, what, what is it that people want? They, you know, connection and love and like, and, and, and it starts out as like, I want pussy or I want dick or I want, I want this sexual euphoria. I want bliss and you get all that stuff and then you're like, okay, where did, where does
Starting point is 01:23:33 it all go? Or what is, what do I do with it? And, and to get more of that stuff, I want to be a better baseball player. I want to do the shop put better or be a good violinist and, and then I'll get more of the good stuff that you brings me bliss and all that kind of thing. And then as, as you get older and you're like, okay, I don't need to come 14 times a day in order to stay sane or whatever now and, and all my, my biology is, is getting calmer. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:23:56 What choice is it to, to go out and drive? What is it then? If it's not this heightened, like conquering kind of energy, right? That's out there. Oh shit. I got to get my show to Netflix before this next guy does. Cause if he drops his first baby, they're not going to want one or whatever the scarcity comes in.
Starting point is 01:24:12 All the evils come to the devil. The hell, hell starts to come into our lives unless what? Unless I become helpful. That's it. And so either I can become dominating and shitty to people around me and be like, yeah, you can't do it that way cause of whatever, or I can be a dude that's like, oh man, here's a way that I shave some time off of that. Or here's, I become helpful as a guidepost to somebody coming behind me because they're
Starting point is 01:24:34 going to be better than me. That's how evolution works. But I can help them meet their goals in a better way and we can have synergy of time and distance and bring that temporal plane to a useful, uh, interaction between new and old. Right. And, and I, and I think maybe, maybe there's something in that that's like, maybe that's where our place is in life now a little bit.
Starting point is 01:24:53 And that's why I've been more paying attention to the podcast and going, no, this is something that this is a discipline that you need to keep and that this is going to continue on because if, if nothing else, it's telling a story of hope to somebody else. And if you've fucking gone and you stood in the darkness, you got a responsibility to show people that it's way lighter on the other side, no matter how dark it is right now where you're at, that there's fucking light that's going to crack open any fucking moment and it's going to bring you an awareness that's way bigger and richer than you had previous to the darkness.
Starting point is 01:25:23 And that's, and we need those stories to come back. That's it. And that, what you just said is actually how it gets described. Like, oh, one of the ways I've heard enlightenment described is like, it's literally like turning on a light, like turning on a light, you just turn on a light. There's no, it's not like the darkness is, is it, is like it as a fog or whatever. But when you turn on the light, it's like, oh, oh, this, oh shit, I could see for a second. Oh my God.
Starting point is 01:25:49 Whoa. Oh, that's what that was. That thing I kept bumping into. Oh, I thought that was, oh, shit. That, that was a structure inside of me that I wasn't able to see. I thought that was in somebody else. And then you start realizing all the edges you've been banging your shins on that you thought were in something, it was you.
Starting point is 01:26:08 And then somewhere in there, there's freedom. But the, what I want to go back to what you said, which is a binary. And it's is, I hate putting out like, when here's an easy solution, because there isn't an easy solution. You do have to unfortunately do repetitive things over time to experience change. Simple, but not easy. Simple, but not easy. But the simple binary is the moment you flip the switch from serving yourself to
Starting point is 01:26:38 trying to help as clumsy and like unsuccessful as that attempt to help other people may be, the light turns on. That seems to be the light switch. When it's off, you're being selfish. When it's on, you're helping. It's as simple as that. And I, it seems like if this is some kind of trans dimensional university for fledgling gods, that the lesson that we're being taught or goddesses,
Starting point is 01:27:06 the lesson we're being taught is don't be selfish. And the way we're being taught the lesson is the same way you teach any baby, the same way as you've got to let the baby figure out a role on their own. You can't push the, I like our son is learning how to roll and watching him. He hasn't figured out. He's got to get both his arms up and to roll. Cause otherwise the other arm, it sticks him. So it's like, you watch him and you watch how hard he's trying to be
Starting point is 01:27:34 frustrating for you as a father to watch and not help. And like, you can't, you can't help. You know, and, and, and, you should have just named him struggle. Sorry, struggle, struggle, good luck, bud. But you know what I'm saying? That is pretty much a very simple predicament he's in, but one that he's got to figure out on his own or he's never going to be able to roll. And I think that as above so below, if that's the way it happens with a baby,
Starting point is 01:28:01 it, that still continues now, which is that we are clearly being taught something here. And what we're being taught is if you're selfish, you're going to be in hell. And if you're selfless in the sense that you're getting out, you're, you're, you're letting yourself, a former idea of who you are, go bye-bye. It's like a blindfold comes off. It's almost like we are a freedom. Yeah, like what you've been saying, a freedom.
Starting point is 01:28:27 And you, and, and, and that's, and so then now suddenly it's like you book. Yeah, you, it's your job. Then if you get your torch lit in the fucking dark cave of life, right? Cause you're born into fucking pain. I mean, we have a lot of platitudes about a universal spirit and soul. And that's a God shield around the world. And all of us are connected in that way and infinity. And for sure, that's all true.
Starting point is 01:28:49 For sure, that's true, but also it's a war. And those same souls are trying to eat and leech you and because they're at a different place in earth school and at the beginning grades, man, shit's fucking rough and it's ugly. And that's one reason you got to become resilient and strong because there's a lot of fucking wolves out there that'll rip you apart. And, and as we're torn asunder, we're screaming, God, just take me. I'd rather be dead.
Starting point is 01:29:13 And then we don't fucking die and we learn to be strong. And this is our life. You don't die. And so then we're in this cave and we've got this torch. And fucking the thing is, is like, now, how do I let other people light off of my torch and your torch has to be there and it has to be non-judgmental and allow anybody to light off of it? Yeah.
Starting point is 01:29:34 Because the things I hate about you or about whomever isn't you. It's the things that you're hiding from me. You act in ways that are funny, that are on you, not you. And then I see that as bullshit. And like, why is he acting shady? And we get all these differences when really the truth is that we are as we started similar, similar to a degree that it's hard to comprehend even, you know, I mean, I've done things with, with groups of people before that are
Starting point is 01:30:05 these submersive kind of experiences where you become telepathic almost. I mean, you can, and people talk about that. And I mean, I've heard of guys in wingsuits doing that, becoming telepathic. Like we're flying in wingsuits one behind one behind the third, behind the fourth. And as the first is making the turn, if you started turning, when you saw him turn, you're turning too late and you're going to be into the building, you know. And, and so there's this, this unified thought that has to happen for this synergy of four different people to work as they're turning the corner on a building,
Starting point is 01:30:38 you know, and, and in that same way, I believe that we have that capacity. But it's kind of like, when I think about God, I think about like electricity. And I think a hundred years ago, I shine a flashlight at you. You burned me at the stake. Like that seems crazy, right? You know, but maybe God's like that. Now, when we understand God more, we'll get a clearer picture of that. When we understand telepathy more in our own souls and how we are connected
Starting point is 01:30:59 and so dissimilar, maybe we get to communicate in a more loving, useful way. If we get to higher realms, if you will, or something, people think that, you know, everyone's like, well, you know, when the monkeys came out of the trees and started evolving and it's like, yeah, you know, it had to happen. An alien came and fucked a monkey. Well, before the alien came, the monkey had to get out of the fucking tree. Yeah, it's like the monkey had to do. There were monkeys who had to go to get out of the tree
Starting point is 01:31:25 and some of the monkeys died because the snakes are down there. And that's what they had to do it for us to be these kinds of monkeys. And it's like people think you think we were with this. This process has stopped. You know what I love what you watch the sea turtles and they hatch on the beach, right? Yeah, you want to see a fucking rugged thing. I mean, you watch the Battle of the Bulge.
Starting point is 01:31:47 You watch a lot of these battles, whatever that shit's horrible. D-Day fucking awful. My friend Harrison, I spoke of earlier, blown up on the shores of Italy and fucking left for dead by the fucking Nazis. Yes, like, I mean, tens of thousands of men died on storming shorefronts, right? And you look at these little turtles that get born in the birds that pick them off and they have to race to the water.
Starting point is 01:32:09 And 60 percent of them, 70 percent of them are going to die. They're food and the fuck. And they still have to go, though. You have to go. You might be you, but you have to go. Your brother might win. You got to go. And then like this idea of like it's not different than that.
Starting point is 01:32:24 Like you got to go and get to the water. Now, I don't know what the water is for a human. It's probably different for all of us, but the sense of like safety. But that's just getting in the game. It doesn't mean you're safe yet. That's just the place where, OK, I'm accessible. My fins work in this shit where they don't work on the sand. It's like now I'm in the game.
Starting point is 01:32:40 There's still death all around me. But now at least I can take care of myself in a way that's better than I could before. And it's like there's that like that's not unlike all of us. You know, that struggle to live fucking powerful. And it ain't it ain't something that you're just owed. Think how good it feels to be a little sea turtle made for the ocean. Who's just come out of a weird shell.
Starting point is 01:33:05 You're on sand. It's great, but it's not what you're made for. And the moment you hit the water, that sense of like, oh, right. Before the thing eats you. And you're in a new universe. Yeah, that's right. And this pattern is the pattern of awakening, which is that every single one of us is a baby sea turtle.
Starting point is 01:33:27 And many of us have gotten frozen on the beach. And in that frozen state, we don't get picked off by seagulls. We're picking ourselves off. You're indecisive. You die. Yeah, yeah. And then there's that moment where suddenly like, whoa. Everything is different and everything feels so much better now.
Starting point is 01:33:48 And the reason that is, is because now you're getting into the element that you're made for. And I love the analogy because in that, it still doesn't mean you're done. No, you're just starting. It's like that thing when guys told me, oh, you got into a black belt. Now the learning can begin. Now you know enough at black belt level to do base learning. Now you can start to learn.
Starting point is 01:34:10 Right. That's a crazy thing to tell somebody. I interviewed Damien Eccles. He's this brilliant author. He was unfortunately like falsely confined to prison for a long time. But during that time, he got all this dis was brilliant. But one of the things he said that popped my brain was, oh, enlightenment in a lot of traditions is actually just the very first step.
Starting point is 01:34:31 And then there's other stuff. So it's like, what are you what? I believe that it's crazy. But the and also when you add to it, that the idea that we were all sea turtles, that we've been incarnating here so much. Well, it's crazy. You think we're amphibious. Your son was breathing amniatic fluid that months ago.
Starting point is 01:34:52 And then come out, boom, into a different universe. Yeah. And now also learn to breathe different now. Yeah, yeah, heavy. And if you add to that the concept of reincarnation, right, which is the idea of like, oh, man, you've been doing this so long. And and it's not like you were reincarnation has nothing to do with like, oh, you're going to be born in the future.
Starting point is 01:35:15 You could be born in the past. You could be born in an alternate universe completely. You could be born on another planet. We don't know enough about time really to understand that. Yeah, you incarnate as a microbe. You might as well be on another planet because that place is completely different than this place. But the stories of the Buddha are so cool because they talk about the various
Starting point is 01:35:34 incarnations leading up to the moment of realization. And at some point he's, he just started giving himself to the world. So there's this, did I tell you the story of him as the prince and the tigers? One of the stories is like he was on a hunting trip and he looked over and he saw a mother, a, a Tigris and she didn't have milk cause she was starving to feed her cubs. So he told like his services, like, go, go, I'll catch up. And then he go, he let the Tigris eat him so that she could give milk to her
Starting point is 01:36:04 cubs, like she let himself be eaten by a tiger. And there's story after story after story where he began to realize that kind of what you're saying is like, fuck it. I'll just die. Yeah. And so he just started doing that in the most selfless way, which is like, oh, I'll just, you know, I'll, here I'll die. I'll just give myself.
Starting point is 01:36:19 Here I'll die. Yeah, I'm, I'm more important. You're more important than your, your cubs are more important than me. I'm just a prince. You go ahead and eat me. And, and so that is when you start, you know, if this is a simulation, then that's when you start like hitting some kind of new pitch because you figured out, oh, I don't have to be afraid of death anymore.
Starting point is 01:36:42 I keep doing this over and over, but every time I do it this time, I'm just going to give away everything. See what happens. This guy that helped me infinitely. I could never repay. Um, and I hadn't spoken to him before he died, but he'd been, he had Hep C and, and he was given a liver by the time he was like 70. I know when he's like 50, you know?
Starting point is 01:37:03 And, uh, and he said, he thought about it. And he says, you know, I've had a great life. I'm 70 years old. You give that liver to somebody, the younger that can use it. And it's like, it's that reminds me of that kind of story. It's like, there's, there's those heroes all around us, man. You know, that's the Buddha. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:37:19 Because if we change the idea of like we reincarnate only in the future, the Buddha could have reincarnated in 2040 in one of his incarnations. That was the Buddha. You were in the presence of that being and you witnessed one of the great miracles, which is the moment someone puts their entire existence behind someone else's and doesn't do, because you know what you have to gain from that in this world? Nothing there. You're not going to get any money for that.
Starting point is 01:37:50 You're not going to get fame for that because you're going to die. And so, you know, that, that is the most that those are considered the highest incarnations. I know someone who died helping a dog get off a train track. These things, that's what we're, you know, hopefully you aren't going to die. You don't have to do these extreme things, by the way. But goddamn, if I do, let it be for something like that. Yeah, man.
Starting point is 01:38:15 And PS, every time you do a thing that isn't selfish, that is for someone else, you do die in that moment because the self is gone. That's the one thing I, yeah. I think, I hashtag seek death on a lot of things. And I think that that's the idea of it is that, you know, you get, why would I undertake this if I'm not going to put my all into that, you know? And I think of that in retrospect. Now it puts a whole different, a whole different filter on my relationship with
Starting point is 01:38:45 John, when you say that, like that he was the boot and he put his whole self because he did nothing short of that. He gave me his time. He gave me the most precious thing he had and he gave me his moments and his time and his consideration, you know? And that's an acknowledgement that I hadn't had in a long time, you know? Yeah. And goddamn, man, it makes a difference.
Starting point is 01:39:03 And look at the ripples from, because we're all doing, we're all doing like the dive into the oblivion, so to speak. It's not oblivion actually. It's a never ending series of incarnations. But in, I feel like it's diving into the hand of God. It feels like you're diving into an abyss. Yeah, but you really ripples in the time, space continuum. And in this sense, the ripples from your friends, uh, diving into the hands
Starting point is 01:39:25 of God, the abyss, the ripples, are you telling the story? And his, his particular, uh, moment of, uh, selflessness now ripples. As long as there are podcasts and they build, yeah, these are his ripples from the way he was swimming. These are the ripples from his boat that has temporarily gone beyond the veil, but still the ripples happen here. And that's the idea is like, we're just trying to make these ripples not be the kind of ripples that cause tsunamis and destruction.
Starting point is 01:40:00 That's what Don used to say that he used to say, take every man, he's standing on the edge of the universe and he's thrown pebbles in and it causes ripples and that's our job. We just stand on the banks and we throw pebbles in and he says, and now the thing is that we don't know is that every time we throw, we're infusing each pebble with either destruction or growth. And so we're either upsetting other people's boats and waves and this and that, or we're looking for unisly unity and to be, to be deft and, and seamless
Starting point is 01:40:30 in our integration into the universe so that we're not upsetting other people's and, uh, and that our impact would be only good. Make those be your ripples, Tate. He would be very proud of you because those are the ripples that you're making. Well, thanks man. How can people find you, sir? Just my name, Tate Fletcher. You can, uh, my company's caveman coffee.
Starting point is 01:40:49 You can find me. I'm almost every action, uh, bad guy. Wait, man, I'll stop you for a moment. I just have to say this, man. When you were asking for my address, I didn't know it was four. I was excited though. I knew it'd be something cool, but I did not know that I was going to get a massive box of my favorite thing in the world.
Starting point is 01:41:07 I love your, what would you call it? Cold brew. It's a nitro cold brew, the cans. I have been slurping that back nonstop. It is so good. Thank you so much, man. Do I have a fridge for what I wanted a hot one? And so I popped it, I shook it up, popped it, put it in a cup, threw it in the
Starting point is 01:41:25 microwave because we've been messing with a hot tap. So we do cold brewed coffee, cold brewed over like 16 hours or whatever. And so the extraction is slow. So there's no bitterness. The taste is different, whatever, but then throw it on a, on a hot tap. So we'll tap it, tap a keg of cold brew, run it over a heat plate and heat it up. A nitrogenated cold brew and, uh, it's fucking fantastic. New, a whole new flavor.
Starting point is 01:41:48 That works. Anyway, I can do it with the cans that I have. I just poured it in a cup and threw it in the microwave and heated it up. Anyway, all of it's awesome. I'm glad you, I'm glad you're enjoying it. Yeah, that's been a whole new, I mean, you know, and that's the, the coffee game. The, you know, we're going to play this game for a little while. And, and that's like being in a university, you know, the whole thing.
Starting point is 01:42:06 You're doing a good job, man. It's still, and I'm not just saying this just because you just did my podcast or you gave me a box of, if I didn't like it, I would just want to mention it. But damn, thank you so much. Congrats for figuring out a way to make such a delicious. Thanks, man. Yeah, it's been years in the making and people are like, well, what'd you do? Like as an entrepreneur, whatever I go, I don't even know really, I guess
Starting point is 01:42:26 that's what it is. I feel sheepish when I hear people say, oh, you're an entrepreneur. I'm like, I don't really think of it like that, you know, but like, uh, how do you stay, you know, cause we've been around for like five years or whatever. And, uh, we've been around so long and, and, uh, because we didn't know any better. We would have been bigger than we were, but, but so all you do is you pick something that you like and then you stay alive is what I found about a business. Right.
Starting point is 01:42:48 It's like, you don't, you don't let it kill you and then you're still alive. And then you keep throwing yourself into the market and then the market keeps reflecting back like, no, you need your labels to be like this. No, this bag would need to be like this to be on the shelf. No, this would need to be, have this kind of stability. No, this would, and so then all the time you go in, you hear the no and the why. And that's a great, you know, obstacle. It's not a stopping point.
Starting point is 01:43:10 It's great information for how do I now amend myself so that I can now be in the party that I want to be at. And that's kind of what we've done with the, with the whole thing. And, and we haven't sacrificed our sustainability or our approach with our farmers or any of that stuff. And, and it's been a real neat experience. I don't mean to prolong this and do some kind of weird, like old school telemark, like, you know, in the TV, telethon or whatever, but I do love
Starting point is 01:43:32 Colbru and Jerry Lewis and Jerry Lewis. And I'm only, I'm not sponsored by you. I'm just saying this purely out of love for the, for it. But like the other thing you pulled off, which is really fascinating to me is, it looks cool, but then also it's got like this weird, perfect weight to it, which is weird. Do you know what I'm talking about? Where you want to hold?
Starting point is 01:43:51 I'm a texture. What is the tech? Yeah. What is that? We're careful. That's so cool, man. Yeah. Cause I was noticing, like, how is this like ASMR?
Starting point is 01:43:59 It's crazy. It's like, it's like, not, it's not, it is crazy. It's crazy. It's like, you're hitting, like when you, when you open it, it's an experience tactily. And then the first thing you notice when you bring it up is the odor of it. And you're like, there's chocolate. It smells different.
Starting point is 01:44:14 And then the flavor in your mouth is first a nasal thing. And then the tech, I mean, it's like on a lot of different levels. We've bucked, we've been around for a minute. Yeah. Congratulations. Thanks brother. And Tay, I love you. I love you too.
Starting point is 01:44:25 Thanks for having me, man. Hare Krishna. Cool. That was great. Thank you, man. Yeah, brother. Very inspiring. You bet you're very inspiring.
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