Duncan Trussell Family Hour - 591: Conner Habib
Episode Date: November 17, 2023Conner Habib, it is fire, it is beauty, it is brilliance, re-joins the DTFH! DUBLIN and EVERYWHERE ELSE! Be sure to join Conner for his LIVE and ONLINE workshop on Saturday, December 2! It's called ...Occult Philosophies: An Introduction to Rudolf Stener & the Western Esoteric Tradition. Tickets available right here. Conner is also an author and has his own podcast! Read his book, Hawk Mountain, available everywhere you get your books, and check out his podcast, Against Everyone with Conner Habib! Original music by Aaron Michael Goldberg. This episode is brought to you by: Uncommon Goods - Visit UncommonGoods.com/Duncan for 15% Off your first order! Lumi Labs - Visit MicroDose.com and use code DUNCAN at checkout for 30% Off and FREE Shipping on your first order! Squarespace - Use offer code: DUNCAN to save 10% on your first site.
Transcript
Discussion (0)
T.S. Eliot was a poet, essayist, publisher, playwright, literary critic, and editor.
He is considered to be one of the 20th century's greatest poets, as well as a central figure
in English-language modernist poetry.
His trials in language, writing style, and structure, reinvigorated English poetry.
He is also noted for his critical essays, which often re-evaluated long-held cultural
beliefs.
But last week, after opening a trunk purchased at an estate sale, Shanda Claren, a London
retiree, made a discovery that changes everything we know about Elliott.
At first I thought the trunk was just filled with ladies slippers, but then I realized that
inside each slipper was a handwritten poem.
Each signed by TS Elliott.
The poems were sent to Dr Amanda Humphrey of the Royal Literary Society for Analysis and
Verification.
When I saw these poems for the first time, I nearly wept. It was as though I were alone in the room with Elliot.
There on the paper, dotted by dried yellow dots of Elliot's tea,
were undiscovered writings by one of the greatest poets in modern history.
These poems are classic Elliot.
Bundled within them are all of Elliot's desires and longings.
Take panty line, for example.
A line that stretches across a yard
thin, tenuous fibril yet firm,
a silken tendon of drying.
And like flags, the panties dangle their free-flying,
drying but still moist in the morning air
and like spider-blown for a moment,
from his shimmering web left to float
in that place between earth and sky.
I crawl quietly through the yard, returning to the panty line.
Here Elliot captures the poignant, transient beauty of a clothes line, a symbol of life itself
upon which we tread like a tight rope walker, and then we have coming stone, where Elliot writes
about a visit to a cemetery. The light that shines upon the stone is not enough to make me come,
and so my legs they carry me softly through the morning breeze. At last I find a
coming stone that marks the home of ancient bones and draw forth spray and decorate the grave they
say I desecrate. But my favourite of all of them is yellow. You can almost hear Elliot crying out
for his mother. Man I may be with chest of hair and bearded chin firm and square, but in moonlight
with no one there it's yellow diaper that I wear.
And who shall hear my rattle,
who shall fill my bottle as I lay alone upon the floor,
gazing sadly at the door,
I come till I can come no more."
The handwritten poems now verified
by the London Literary Verification Society
are valued at over 7,000 pounds
and will go on auction next week. I'm a part of history
For the all hard with joy
For worlds to stay in a dwelling
And the all dancing in the blind
I hope you love truth
I hope you feel a truth I hope you never the truth, I hope you're not too scared of seeking
Unless you're carrying a sleepy guy
They'll always be in the least eye
I hope they die
I hope they have all the good memories erased
and all we remember the worst days.
I hope they can last in some horrible haze
pure confusion.
I hope most of it
while I watch in some cursed forest in the night, I'll make use of every fight."
Greetings friends, it is I, D. True Cell, and what you just heard was the singing of the
Garbott Chaos Warbler.
I'm sad to say that these birds were hunted to extinction by idiots who didn't understand how beautiful
their song truly was.
Oh, how lucky you were if you heard the song of a chaos warbler outside your window.
And it fills me with such grim rage to picture the final moments of the final chaos warbler who landed in front of the window of a New Yorker who decided to smash it to death with a Bible.
I'm so fucking pissed off all I've been doing is smoking weed and snorting rails of Xanx.
Anything to help me not feel the trembling anger that has caused my remaining ball to
suction up deep into my tank. I'm not gonna keep raging and rant in here but I
just want you to know I'm really upset right now and I hope whoever killed the
last chaos warbler is real happy. I hope they're out there in New York City
having some pizza pie and feeling real good about what they did because the world is
Watching you or someone probably is watching you or should be I hope someone watches you for a long time
We got a great podcast for you today
Conner Habib has returned and you know whenever
Connor Habib comes back, it is fire, it is beauty, it is brilliance, and this I
think is the best podcast we ever did together. Before we jump into that though,
I would love to invite you to come to some of my shows. If you happen to be
listening to this the week of November 14th, I'm going to be in Salt Lake City.
If you try to get tickets and realize, holy shit, it's sold out. We added not just one extra show,
which also sold out, but another extra show on Sunday. So if you go to the Wiseguys website or go to my
website or go to my Instagram, you can find ticket links to the remaining show
that we just added.
I hope that you will come out.
I'm taking two weeks off.
There won't be any DTFHs for two weeks or any stand up, but I'm coming back to December
14th.
I'm going to be at the Comedy Zone in Charlotte, NC December 14th through the 16th.
Don't sleep on getting those tickets.
You can find them at DunkinTrustle.com. I'm praying that it's not an anomalous phenomena that I sold out wise guys in Salt Lake City
and that all my shows are going to start selling out so that my ego will get a massive
boner. You can find the Comedy Zone tickets at DunkinTrustle.com. And then after that, I'm going to be at the comedy works January 11th,
helium comedy club, and Indianapolis January 25th, the comedy works is in Denver. Then
you can find me at Hyenas in April. And there's a lot of dates in between that I have yet to put
up on my website. So I should probably get on that. All right, oh, and subscribe to the Patreon.
It's patreon.com for us, DTFH,
you'll get commercial free episodes of this podcast,
and eventually I'm gonna upload an entire hour of me
just plugging random shit with no podcast attached.
So you just get a whole hour of me going on
and on and on plugging things,
but first I have to finish designing
my signature set of DTFH, Nipple Extenders and Clamps. They're coming. Don't worry.
Today's guest, Connor Habib, has a wonderful podcast that I hope you all will definitely check out. It's called Against Everyone with Connor Habib. He also wrote an amazing book called Huck Mountain.
And this is very important. He has an upcoming event that I hope you all will sign up for.
It's called a cult philosophies, an intro to Rudolph Steiner and the Western Esoteric tradition with Conor Habib, that Saturday, December
2nd.
I'm telling you, this man that you're about to listen to is a genius.
I love chatting with him, and if you are interested in having your mind blown, smattered
all about, exploded, then recombinated. Is that a word? Rearranged. It's not that bad. It's not that bad. It's not that bad. It's not that bad. It's not that bad.
It's not that bad.
It's not that bad.
It's not that bad.
It's not that bad.
It's not that bad.
It's not that bad.
It's not that bad.
It's not that bad.
It's not that bad.
It's not that bad.
It's not that bad.
It's not that bad.
It's not that bad.
It's not that bad.
It's not that bad.
It's not that bad.
It's not that bad.
It's not that bad.
It's not that bad.
It's not that bad. It's not that bad. It's not that bad. It's not that bad. It's not that bad. If you want to sign up, go to ConorHabeeb.com.
Click on events.
You can find all the upcoming events there and you can sign up.
But now, won't you listen to this wonderful conversation with my dear friend, ConorHabeeb. I'm gonna sing it. I'm gonna sing it. I'm gonna sing it.
I'm gonna sing it.
I'm gonna sing it.
I'm gonna sing it.
I'm gonna sing it.
I'm gonna sing it.
I'm gonna sing it.
I'm gonna sing it.
I'm gonna sing it.
I'm gonna sing it.
I'm gonna sing it. I'm gonna sing it. You're a beautiful person. Connor, welcome back to the DTFH, my friend.
It's so good to see you.
Here we go again.
It's great to see you too.
Here we go again.
Now, I'm looking at the background of your beautiful Irish home.
I got some, seeing some books there on the shelf,
you got candles burning.
What part of the house is that?
You have like a study or what am I looking at?
It's just the front room.
I've turned the front room into like, yeah, where we sit and watch TV,
but there's also like my little work desk and everything, which I think like anybody
wants to be a writer or do any kind of creative thing, they have to have their own space.
Like they read that out their own space. It makes such a difference to clear it out and then
reopen it with the intention. So rather than using a whole room in the house, I do have a room
upstairs that's just like a reading room. But rather than like that, I have just a desk gets a wall,
I'll have like a painting above me that you can't see and like a tree and everything. And that feels like I'm in a different room when I do this.
Like you know what it's like when you set up a base, it actually, it does transport you.
And like I tell every writer that I work with or whatever I'm like, make a space.
Yeah. And you know, I feel like one of the many linguistic to services of the post industrial revolution society
that we're existing in is the word office.
So like we are limited, just shoved into the stupid word
for our creative spaces.
So you call it a fucking office.
It's not an office.
It's a laboratory, you know, an occult chamber.
And you know, whatever you want to call it an
alchemical laboratory, whatever you want to call it, but office. I mean, truly, if you want to
defing linguistically, what is you do in a space where you're creating, call it a fucking office?
It's an office. It's like I do my filing here.
Even, I mean, then I say this word sometimes, but even workspace, like, I just, I don't like that.
Oh, yeah.
Wow.
I'm workspace. It's a shared workspace.
These mother fuckers, man, they just, they're so good. Like, you want to talk about this,
the, the, the sorcerers that live on this fucking planet. They are so good at making
everything about work, mundanity. You know what I mean? Like just just turning
everything, what's it called? Sad beige mom? You ever heard of this? No, but I
get it already. Yeah.
You get it, right? It's like this impulse that happens where they
just want everything to be beige. It's something like happens in
their brain. It's postpartum. I'm sorry.
Bage moms. But like, yeah, they just bage it down, man,
bage it down. And like similarly, these sorcerers, man,
they just want to like yank the fucking teeth.
They want to declaw the cat.
Basically, you know the whole state of that is, dude?
It's like, remember, like you would get this like sticky pillow attachment thing to put
on the phone.
So you could like lean your head over and like hold the corded phone up against, like
we had one of those in my house when I was a kid,
and it was beige.
And it was that weird kind of like, you know,
like squished pupa shape,
that like you'd leave an over and hold it,
and it also had the weirdest like texture.
It was like kind of plastic, but kind of soft.
And all it was was so you could tilt,
and like just fucking ruin your neck and spine and vertebra,
so you could like talk on the corded phone and it was beige and that's the shape of their
spell like it's the shape of that gross phone pillow. Yeah, pupa, pupa.
And again, like I'll tell you man, if I was like a demon or if I was running some organized
demonic experiment, number one would not keep hell the same.
Like I would do various experiments and how be like, okay,
this millennia, let's do beige.
We're gonna do like phones and like, it will be a pupa.
Like they won't see that they're cradling a pulsating demonic larva.
Under there.
And, but it shall be a larva and that'll be funny because they won't know this lately.
A demonic impregnated demonic catapult.
Yeah.
That's where it holds and pulls from.
Yeah.
You know, the last time we try to do how they we let them have their alchemical laboratories and they almost defeated us with their metaphysical power.
So let's call them offices this time.
Make sure we limit the scope of what they do this time to filing.
Right. Like if we find Atlantis, like we find, you know, like all the
sun and city of Atlantis, the reason why it fell is you just find those
beige filing cabinets and like,
just like the state, the Claude stable removers
and stuff like that.
Nothing to advance, you know.
That was paper clips.
Yeah, everywhere.
Yeah, paper clips, malfunctioning printers.
Well, Connor, so, you know,
we decided to do this podcast
because you have a class coming about the occult
and Rudolph Steiner.
And so, I mean, that's a pretty broad topic.
What, how do you, like, when you start a class
like that in the occult, like what's day one look like?
Well, this is, it's only one day.
So day one and day.
Oh day one is your own.
It's all the same.
Yeah.
Day time's just an illusion, maybe.
So this is one to quote dangles.
This is one day.
The one main the last day is near.
Yeah.
So what does it look like?
How do we, how do you, how do you teach about this?
Is this for advanced students?
No, no.
Yeah, I mean, it could be like,
it could be for people that are interested in it,
you know, already and have some,
so it's called the cult philosophies
and intro to Rudolph Steiner in the Western
as the terror tradition.
And basically, you know, and this is,
I hope we just talk about this this episode
because I've just been noticing world events
I mean, you can't help but notice them, you know, they seize hold of you and I was like, okay, so what's actually
Needed right now and I know that some of what's needed is for people to connect with you know spirit to connect with their spirituality
There are other people that are you know working on that but for me
I look at my spirituality
is coming from the Westernist or Tarrac tradition.
With Rudolf Steiner is a singular figure, but I particularly mean like esoteric Christianity
and Rudolf Steiner is the big figurehead of that.
So I'm not like a Steinerite or, you know, even maybe his system is called Anthroposophy,
even anthropocifist, exactly,
but I find a lot to drawn from there.
And so I decided to just offer this kind of basic
introductory course.
The guy has 6,000 lectures,
his dozens of books,
and he's really kind of in some ways difficult to grasp. And so I'm just
going to leave people through some of the basic concepts, but also offer some experiential exercises
that we can do, you know, like you and I did like on one of the episodes we did together, I kind of
led you through like a bit of a... I think about it once a week. I'm not joking.
I think about it once a fucking week. I let you into my head. I'm not done. I do. I really do, man.
You're so my mind. It was thanks. Thanks. Yeah. You're so funny. You called me. I think on that
episode, you were like, you're a living psychedelic substance. And I just had a guest on the show.
I think on that episode, you're like, you're living psychedelic substance,
and I just had a guest on the show,
Polar Lesco, she's just this incredible,
like, money, esoteric worker person, she's so cool.
And she said the same thing to me.
She was like, you're like living LSD,
and I was like, thank you.
The only other person that said that to me
was Dunkin' Trust, was like, I love Dunkin' too.
I like the, you know,
activating substance for people in that way. Um, and I hope this, this course will be that too,
because there's some, I'm not doing it to like give people sensationalistic experiences or anything.
It's to leave them through so they can understand. There's like, uh, there's a quote from Rudolf Steinner
where he kind of said, exasperated to all the people that are coming to visit him. And listen to him, he was like,
I don't want you to believe me.
I want you to understand me.
And so that's what I'm trying to do
is offer some understanding to something
that seems otherwise really dense.
Even though it's been picked up and influenced so many people,
like it's influenced Rachel Carson,
who wrote Silent Spring me and started the
environmental movement, Fondana Shiva, the seed activist. I mean some people
that you would know like John Qsac and you know, Tilda Switten helps start a
small Rudashjara school. It's behind Waldorf education, biodynamic farming,
community shared agriculture, camp hill communities, and then like lots of
experimental artists that people know, Hillmouth communities, and then lots of experimental artists
that people know, Helmouth, Clint,
and Vosly Kandinsky, Joseph Burr.
I know, I Kandinsky, okay, I love Kandinsky.
Well, you might know the filmmaker,
Andrej Tarkowski, who did stalker,
and Solaris, he was basically an anthroposophist.
So people are deeply influenced by this,
and nobody really in the US knows that much about it. And for me,
whenever there are, I think you do this too. It's something that's really like cool about your show,
is whenever there are times where everything feels really condensed and heavy, like
things are just like a almost like a hardened collapse star, you know, and you
feel like there's nowhere to go and there's nowhere to breathe.
It's so important to turn to the things that seem wild and impossible and almost like just
nuts because then suddenly everything starts opening up and all these new possibilities
become available in your imagination and therefore your ability to act and direct things. So that's why
this is so important to me now and why I'm offering it. Okay, this reminds me, and I'm sure he's
influenced by Jotorowski. One of my favorite Jotorowski quotes is sometimes you got to kick over the
Ants Nest and watch him build it back up. And you know, it's like that, right? I mean, it's like, we're talking, this, you know,
the tendency in the universe, things coalesce,
densify, and then there's this form that happens.
And which is great if you wanna like live on a planet,
have a house, you need coalesce matter.
But when it happens to you, and you coalesce, you know,
what I mean, too much. And then you start resisting the very thing that got you there in
the first place. That's where that's to me. That's in any time that happens. This is
where I start getting depressed, start getting grumpy, shitty. So that's what you're talking about. Like this is a sort of methodology of deconstructing
whatever kind of condensed,
eagotic form you happen to be stuck in.
Yeah, I mean, I think, you know, for me,
it's definitely in my own personal life
and then just in the life of the world and
obviously there's a lot of
Shall we say painful exchange between those two that's going on in people's lives right now
They see the world and they feel there are no options people are really right feel as if we have lost the power to direct things. But in fact, we are a part of it, and we do have the power to direct things.
But before we can actually access that, we have to feel like, oh, I can direct things.
So before we access actually directing things, we have to get in touch with the thinking
and the feelings and the ability to act,
that is like, I actually can change things.
And usually the contraction of that,
the inaccessibility of that is due to people
not feeling like there are any options to them
because they're only looking at what's in front of them.
And usually when the world has gone so crazy,
it's because the options that they
think they have choice A or choice B are bound together. I mean, the easiest way for Americans,
I think, to understand that is like Democrat Republican, two-party, politic, whatever.
Right.
And then, you know, they desperately scramble like, well, what if we had a third-party candidate?
But what I'm saying is like, let's, you know, first we can go beyond that totally and say,
why do we have political parties?
But then we go beyond that and say, like, why this structure at all, why these economic,
cultural, and political structures at all, when there could be something completely different
available to us.
And all it takes is us to sort of move into a different way of approaching that unfurls into action and connectivity with others.
Oh my god, you gave me a gift card. After I hummed you, that makes me feel like a prostitute.
I wish you'd gone to uncommon good, good, good, good.
If you want to hear where'd you get that?
This holiday season, uncommon goods is your secret weapon.
Uncommon goods is here to make your holiday
shopping stress-free by scouring the globe
for the most remarkable and truly unique gifts
for everyone on your list,
whether you're shopping for your secret Santa
or your entire family.
Uncommon goods knows exactly what they want.
Here's a few of my favorite gifts that I found on their site.
They got so much cool stuff,
but why don't you check out their personal planetarium?
This is an amazing viewfinder.
You pop your smartphone in there.
It uses augmented reality,
look up at the night sky,
and you will see the cosmos. This is wonderful
for your kids. If they have any interest in what's going on above the lights of
the city they live in, they deserve to see the raw, unfiltered beauty of the
glorious sky and you can get it for them at uncommon goods.com.
When you shop at uncommon goods, you're supporting artists and small independent businesses.
These fine products are often made in small batches, so shop now before they sell out this
holiday season.
Uncommon goods looks for products that are high quality, unique and often handmade are made
in the U.S.
They have the most meaningful out of the ordinary gifts anywhere.
And with every purchase you make it on common goods, they give back $1 to a nonprofit partner
of your choice.
They donated more than $2.5 million to get 15% off your next gift.
Go to uncommongoods.com slash Duncan.
That's uncommongoods.com slash Duncan for 15% off. Don't miss out on this limited time offer on Common Goods!
We're all out of the ordinary. Coming I'm not sure if you're going to be able to do that. I'm not sure if you're going to be able to do that. I'm not sure if you're going to be able to do that.
I'm not sure if you're going to be able to do that.
I'm not sure if you're going to be able to do that.
I'm not sure if you're going to be able to do that.
I'm not sure if you're going to be able to do that.
I'm not sure if you're going to be able to do that.
I'm not sure if you're going to be able to do that.
I'm not sure if you're going to be able to do that.
I'm not sure if you're going to be able to do that.
I'm not sure if you're going to be able to do that.
I'm not sure if you're going to be able to do that. I'm not sure if you're going to be able to do that. Are we talking about like some kind of initial faith or some kind of a set, like a faith that,
like there is the probability, possibility of change
that doesn't look like the change you're used to?
Is that what it, like it does it start with that kind of like,
you know, that's something that excites me.
Is there every once in a while?
I remember, wait, it can be totally,
profoundly different than the way it is right now.
What that difference looks like, I don't know,
but you know what I mean, I plug into that
imminent possibility.
Is that what you're talking about?
Yeah, I mean, I think that the faith part
I
Would maybe say it a little differently. It's just observation of how the world is worked
I mean if you look at your own life and see how much you've changed
I mean just you and I have known each other for really long time and we've seen each other change quite radically
I think over the years
change quite radically I think over the years. Well, yeah, I became straight and you turned gay.
Yeah, as a result of having sex.
I know.
Ah!
I thought we were never going to go to fight.
Okay, no, but I just one brush of that dude against my balls and suddenly I, I, I, I,
we were roommates.
So I, yeah, but I just, just to say like, you know, you can observe in your own life how radically you've changed. You can also observe how radically nature, which we consider to be permanent has changed. You can examine how things like, you know, social moors have changed in your just in your own lifetime up till now. And we're even dead yet, right? And so much has changed.
And so just to remember that that change is available to us all at all times, but even more radical
than that. So that maybe there's a little bit of faith there, but I would just start with the
observation that so much is available. And if you start in your imagination, I mean, this isn't
something that I'm going to go over in the course. But if you start in your imagination, I mean, this isn't something
that I'm going to go over in the course. But if you just close your eyes, and I tell you
to imagine one thing, like a chair, and then I tell you to imagine a dragon, you can do it
just like that, right? So it's as profound as that. It's as profound as that. That's what's
available to us because it's happening in our thought world. And I'm not talking about manifesting stuff.
It takes more than just manifestation and wanting and desire and all that.
I mean, maybe that can be a part of it, but it takes a guiding through in a certain way.
So, you know, I mean, just, I think, I can't remember if I've said this on the show before,
but I remember Grant Morrison, the comic writer, you know, talking about how he grew up with, you know,
parents who were against nuclear weapons and I think nuclear power plants as well, but like nuclear
bombs. And he said they were fighting against it all the time. And he's like, and I came to
realize at a certain point that nuclear weapons were an idea
before they became these material things.
And Superman was also an idea.
So I figured I would work on, I would work on bringing Superman
into the real.
And so everything's an idea.
Everything has this spiritual form before it descends
into my grandchildren.
And solidifies.
So that's what I'm talking about. That is cool. It's
maybe you could talk a little bit about the unnerving aspect
to that because there's something unnerving about that. You
know, there's something like death wrapped up in it, not like
physical death, but there's something in there
where it's like, hey, wait a minute. I don't want to let go of my security blanket here. You're asking me to put down
literally everything and it's scary as fuck because what it's not a blanket, it's
the entire way that you're interpreting reality and also the
the entire way that you're interpreting reality and also within the possibility that within that reinterpretation reality itself will alter. Does Steiner talk about that?
Wuzi kind of feeling you get when you brush up against that possibility?
Level after level after level of it in fact, at every unfolding or opening of spiritual development,
a new terror, a new woozy, no, so do you call it, occurs, and in some ways, getting through
one level of spiritual development does not prepare you for the next, which is even more
frightening.
It can strengthen you, but it doesn't necessarily
prepare you to see or to overcome or even see the challenge. And so, yeah, I think one
of those earlier levels is like, well, what do I, what do I do if I let go of the idea
that the world is made of objects and motion and instead see the truth, which is that the world is composed of evolving
states of consciousness.
So now that that falls away, I'm going to have to do something else here.
I'm going to have to see things in a different way.
And then when you start doing that, all, I mean, again, would just want to be careful to not say this to just create
the lore of novel exciting weird experiences those all do happen but weird shit starts
to happen weird things start to unfold once you start engaging in that way and it can be
quite frightening for instance what happens when you take your thoughts as seriously as objects,
then you become responsible for them. And that's very, that's something to deal with.
But that's something to contend with. It's not always easy for sure. And you know that they can
affect people. You know actually your thoughts have an effect in the world. And that is true
of everybody already, but once you wake up to it, it becomes even more true and more challenging.
So, okay, help me understand that. So in my Buddhist training or whatever you want to call it,
you know, you in Buddhism you'll hear a thing like the mind creates thoughts the way the tongue
salivates. There, or, you know. There's this noting is what it's called.
So when my mind produces what these days,
people call intrusive thoughts.
What I do is I go thinking so that I don't get
grabbed by the intrusive thoughts sucked in,
lost in a universe of horror from that intrusive thought.
Just let it go.
But it seems like what you're saying is there's
some possibility of shaping the thought prior to its emergence.
I think most people think of thinking as a spontaneous
emergence of some form, some daydream, whatever it may be.
But you're saying that we can sort of incubate thoughts or
intentional eyes are thinking. How does that work? Yeah, intentional eyes are thinking is probably
is probably the closer way for me of identifying with what you've said. So I think you're
what something you're getting to
there is that our thoughts and our thinking are not the same thing. The thoughts
are the cast off objects of the activity of thinking and the activity of
thinking is what we strive for in spiritual development. The working with the
thoughts is something that people work with in self-development and in new age
Self-help-econ of stuff. I don't just credit any of that. I think it all has its value up to a certain point
Everything has its value, but to the extent that it starts setting you back and
Concealing the fact that it's set you back is where I start to worry
So just whenever I make any if I make any sort of seemingly judgemental
things as we talk about this, about psychedelics,
the way, let me pause you just for real quick.
My best friends, and I think of you as one of them,
even though we never fucking talk,
they brutalize my spiritual stuff. And I love it.
Like it never offends me.
And it usually helps me.
Like usually it, so please don't nerf whatever you're going to say.
Yeah, yeah.
And I don't think any of, and if you offend a few people,
so what?
Like go for it, man.
Like cut our throat.
Cut our throat on top of your stinary and cigarette.
Yeah. Yeah. OK. Good. I mean, good. I will.
I but it more it's just to say like listen, don't turn away from what's being said because you think I mean look I was I've done all kinds of fucking crazy shit that spiritual people condemn quite clearly in my life. If you just want to look me up on the internet, you'll find like 200 instances of it easily.
So like, I'm not condemning anybody from doing anything.
So, okay, but I will be a little more assertive.
So what are you talking about your tweets?
No, I'm talking about my dick.
So what's it so used to be in my tweets, but isn't so much these days.
So I would just say like when we engage with our thinking, we're engaging with something different than our thoughts. There's an active process of thinking. Can we get engaged with that in an intentional way? So I like you said intentional as
our thinking. So I say, you know, thinking intentionally, feeling with purity
and acting with purpose. That's where I would go with all three of these things
and just sort of layman's terms. It's how we say that again? Yeah, um, thinking with intention act the feeling with purity and acting with purposefulness
I want to eat THC but I don't want to think about it eating by crabs.
Thanks to Lumi Labs I can do that now.
With microdose gummies.
I want to thank Lumi Labs not just for supporting the DTFH for so long, but for creating the delicious, wonderful, microdose gummies.
Friends, there is no reason for you to overdose yourself on edible weed anymore.
There's no reason for you to pick up a suspicious-looking candy and eat it, and send your brain straight to the depths of hell.
Lumi Labs has taken care of all of the problems
that used to torture us when we would eat edibles.
My friends, this is my favorite edible.
It is legal.
Nation wide. That means you can fly with it.
They can mail it to you.
It's available in every state.
These darling things help me fall asleep on time.
I wake up rested and I love working out on them.
I'm telling you, I would not lead you astray.
I just take half of one of these sweeties and I am doing great.
Microdose. They are available nationwide. You can learn more about microdose and THC by going
to microdose.com use code Duncan to get free shipping in 30% off your first order. Links can be found in the show description, but again, it's microdose.com code Duncan.
Thinking with intention, feeling with purity and acting with purposefulness. How many times do we do any of those things?
Really, it's very, very, very rare.
So this is something that, you know, Rudolf Steiner, and I was just a Christian
esotericism in general has general has brought to me, is
being able to try to access all of that and sometimes exceeding mostly failing whatever.
But when you talk about thoughts, and you're asking me about this, thought to be in
Israel's object, again, thoughts are sort of cast off.
But we, and I think Buddhist would agree in, well, some in, in this sense, we latch on to some of them, right?
We get distracted from that process, that activity of thinking and we end up latching on discern thoughts.
Right.
The thoughts in our heads are mostly the voices of a congregation of beings that meet in our address.
So they come to speak, they come to appear, they come to do things, the voices of a congregation of beings that meet in our address.
So they come to speak, they come to appear, they come to do things, to juggle, to make weird sounds, to make shapes, to whatever.
And to the extent that our thinking activity is not alive, it just ends up becoming a stagnant pool that one of these voices these entities can drink from
and drink from and drink from and it's become bigger and bigger and stronger until they become
you know something that is interfering with our feelings and therefore
unfurling itself into our actions. Gotcha. Gotcha. Yeah okay so we're we're it's some kind of like
Gotcha. Yeah. Okay. So we're it's some kind of like
energy or like it's a
It's like a pool of mana or something and you're saying that these entities one of them if you're if you're not careful
Takes over the other ones are still there, right? Like yeah, and from this perspective
They're still there, but they're being drowned out by whichever one has,
like, become the loudest.
And let me add to the question,
is this to be taken literally?
Like that.
Sharner would say, there's entities inside of you.
OK.
Yeah, definitely, literally.
And this is something that I try to work with when I talk with people about this kind of stuff is that I don't want them again. I don't want them to believe me like, I want them to maybe have a little bit of an experience for this of themselves, but it takes it takes a while to begin to understand that it's actually literal. So I always give a kind of double vision of it. It's like, what's the value,
even if you can't go there with me? So that's something I always try to do. So I just want to
preface it with that, like in the class, I do that, but elsewhere, I do. I'm like, well, like,
for instance, if you don't believe in reincarnation, which is something that I'll probably bring up
in this course, like, what would be the value of believing in it, even if you didn't believe in it?
What could bring to you in your life if you accept it?
So that to me is important.
But when we talk about those beings, just I think the easiest way to visualize it is to
think, you know, well, I mean, there's a midnight gospelsy thing, but like, it's just
just to imagine a fairy tale, like someone walking through the fairy market as soon as they
stop at one stall and take that apple
from that little goblin, like they're there for a hundred years, you know, like everything else
is worrying and buzzing around them, but they're just that's that's a great image of it.
Right, that's so cool. Yeah, I mean, I wonder if you could immediately what comes to mind is one of my favorite stories from the New Testament.
Jesus and the disciples go to this island.
There's this lunatic living in a graveyard.
Everyone's afraid of him. They try to chain him down, but he breaks the chains.
And this is God knows this has been like putting a million exorcism movies but Jesus goes to talk to this poor human and he says we are Legion, we are
Legion. Like you know in in applying it's not just one demon in there. It's a hive of demons. Jesus then does some form of exorcism, sends the demons into the pigs, into some
poor farmers freaking pigs. Not cool. Pigs run off the cliff. All of them die. And leaving
the pig farmer fucked. And so then I think they kind of have to like flee the island. Because
like people, though they're glad the lunatic has been exercise.
They're like, Hey, what about our pigs?
And he was like, See, yeah, I'm not getting you more pigs.
So is that from the Christian mysticism perspective is that in other words, whenever I've heard
that, I've always thought, Oh, those are demons.
But it feels like what you're saying is no,
we all have spirits in us.
Every one of us is possessed by not one,
but many, a plethora of entities.
Yeah, I mean, let me just,
let me see what I can do with that.
Like, in that case, there was a demon thing happening.
Demons aren't singular.
They're, yes, they are congregants that become so overwhelming
for one reason or another.
And it's different whenever that they speak collectively.
The eye, the ego is something that is singularly human.
So for a demon can't even really access that too much.
It can by sort of directing or coercing the person that it's inhabiting.
But if a demon is going to speak through someone and its voice, it's going to be a week,
because it's a congregation that's to come together to overwhelm.
But for us, creepy.
For us with all the sort of beings that are mean, no, those aren't demonic and that's not
possession. In fact, everything is made out of these beings. Our bodies, our organs,
everything is this interlocking, because this is what I said, evolving states of consciousness.
This inner working, inner weaving spiritual world
that composes and maintains all of us all the time,
happening even now as we speak,
and we're creating more as we speak.
Like, if you could just see the room filling up with them,
you know, we'd have no room in like two seconds
because our concepts, our words, our interactions,
the letters that make up the words of the concepts
that we're saying, the gestures, the feelings,
it's all just like a constant adding machine, you know?
So it's like when you shake up carbonated soda,
all the bubbles, it's like those freaking things. I know,
I know the ones are, I mean, I've seen them on mushrooms, like all
the centers, like, what the fuck? They're everywhere. There's so
many. It's like, it's amazing. Like, it's, there's, I know, you mean
no room, like, it's more than like New York, it's just
everywhere. So keep going. Sorry.
Do you know, that's, that's it. So just to say like, we shouldn't mistake the,
like just the beans for demonic just because they're being.
I mean, our bodies are made out of that.
Right.
There's an aspect of us that is not that.
And that is the true self.
That is the true being.
Now, that's, I think where Buddhism and, you know,
Western esoteric Christianity would part ways because
there are some Buddhism that don't, but there is no self-ultimate.
But I say there is a self, and that self is eternal, and everything else dies, everything
else goes away. But that self is
absolutely eternal and it is never suffering and it is always with us and time itself is not
able to contact or touch that. Well, okay, let's talk about that self. Sorry. That self is that
an individualized self or a sort of super self that everyone is
sharing it. In the same way that Christ was the son of God and God, that's what we're talking
about. That makes I don't think that that actually, I don't think that veers too far away from
my understanding. I mean, it's just, it's not like, you know,
especially in the world,
and you know, if you're raised in capitalism,
not knocking capitalism,
everyone gets in and not capitalism,
like a knocking, but if you're conditioned
to believe in like boundaries and fences and walls
and mine and yours, then the moment you contact that thing that you're telling you matter
Have any sense of it you want to you want to put a nice
Border wall around and say myself yourself whereas it's not really
It doesn't really belong to anybody
If that's what you're talking about then I think it does align with Buddhism.
Yeah, I mean, we are in some ways, we are in some ways completely
individuated. And in other ways, we are all united in spirit. The economy actually,
it's interesting to bring up capitalism because the economy's an outpicturing of what I'm talking about. The economy is the all.
So the culture is the individual.
It's just one person.
That's sexuality, art,
just your imagination, even science,
to some extent, is really an individualized.
I'm gonna try this and feel this
and observe an experiment.
Politics is two or more people. When you're trying the political rights realm, it's how do we
negotiate an equality when two people come together? And then the economy is the all. The economy is
everybody, the fraternity. So it's all the breaks and flows, all the resources, all the commons we draw from. And so the economy in some ways is an outpicturing of
the reality of the spiritual world where we are all actually interconnected. We
are all, but we are individuated as well. So yeah, you know, just to say one of the things that I want people to contact through esoteric Christianity is
that truth of the interconnectedness, but it does bring pain and suffering to be able to touch that.
And that's hard like who wants to be like I'm going to do spiritual development so I can hurt.
That's hard, like who wants to be like, I'm gonna do spiritual development so I can hurt.
But it's also hurting to move beyond
the kinds of hurt that we normally feel.
I want a website for my podcast that looks like it was made by God. Squarespace, gives me that power to make a website that looks like God made it. This episode of the DTFH was brought to you by the web wizards over at Squarespace.
My darlings, if you are interested in making a beautiful website connecting with your
audience and showing them that you care about them enough to make a website as beautiful
as the one you will find at DuncanTrustle.com.
That is a Squarespace website.
You want all your socials to show up on your website.
You could do that with Squarespace.
You want to sell stuff.
Obviously, you can do that.
You want to send out beautiful emails to your clients or fans that don't make them think
they're about to fall prey to a ransomware attack.
Squarespace will let you do that.
And best of all, it's really simple to use and they have wonderful customers. Support.
Head to squarespace.com for a free trial. When you're ready to launch, go to squarespace.com
4th slash Duncan to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or a domain. Again, it's Squarespace.com, Ford Slash, Duncan, you'll get 10% off your first purchase
of a website or a domain, but you can try them out for free to make sure they work for
you.
And I know they will, because they're incredible.
Thank you, Squarespace. So, you know, I'm thinking about Rudolf Sainer giving what we would call first responders, emergency aid people, a meditation
to work with when they went to meet other people.
Because if you're surrounded by bodies, people that have been massacred, blown up, mutilated,
if you're surrounded by people who are in extreme harm and you have to help them, you start to absorb and feel that.
Like you have to be able to mediate all that.
So here's the meditative verse he gave.
As long as you feel pain that I avoid, Christ remains unrecognized. At work in cosmic being, for weak is the spirit that
can feel suffering only in its own body. So as soon as I start to access the
truth, I begin to also access the pain of the other. Now that is hard to mediate,
but I also think that we're experiencing that now.
Anyway, we're getting a teeny, teeny tiny out of it.
Not the real thing, which is even worse.
I've actually experienced someone else's pain.
I began to experience and be able to see, you and I actually talked about this on my
show, I was able to see someone else's day through their own eyes.
I was experiencing the pain that they were going through, not just my own pain, but theirs.
And when that happened, it is, that was just one person and it was screamingly, absolutely
unbearable.
If you think about all the pain and suffering you've gone through in your life.
Now imagine also feeling someone else's
from start to finish in their life to wherever they are now.
Now imagine feeling everybody's.
So that's actually coming for us.
That's opening up in the world.
That's going to be an experience that we all have
and nobody's really prepared to mediate that.
I keep hearing that.
Wait, let's talk about that.
What is the, this is the second time
and actually in two podcasts,
where I've heard a version of this imminent sort of lifting
of the boundaries separating us from like true experience.
What is that?
Where does that come from?
Yeah.
So think about the interconnectedness
that's been opening and opening
since I'll take an arbitrary point
because we can go back more than this.
But since we went to the moon,
so since someone was on the moon,
if you believe people went to the moon, since someone was to the moon. So since someone was on the moon, if you believe people went to the moon,
since someone was on the moon,
and could see the entirety of our existence.
So even if no one was on the moon,
we'll just say that picture of the earth is real.
Okay, I'll accept that, brother, not you.
I mean, I don't know about that.
I don't even think about that.
It's fucking real.
Okay, okay, we got a tab dance around these mother-file. Yes, It's real. I actually don't know. It's one of those things I don't
really think about that much. But then I think about it's weird. It's weird that
that happened. But yeah, it's real. So. Same, honestly, same. I don't know. I just
wanted to see him a little more. I just keep the heart feel. The cross ties it. I
don't know. Sometimes I'm like, I don't think that's real.
Okay.
So saying the things that no one else will say,
the moon landing which we have.
Yeah.
So since we saw the entirety of existence,
that has a spatial existence for human beings,
that's been growing and growing as a phenomenon in our lives. That has a spatial existence for human beings.
That's been growing and growing as a phenomenon in our lives. I mean, you could see that just in the expansion
of how many people are we connected to.
Then definitely during COVID and lockdowns,
it was like, I'm sitting alone in my house in one room
and I'm thinking about the entirety of experience
of everybody else on the planet
and what they're going through and how we might affect each other.
That's growing and growing and growing and the internalization of the awareness of the other has been growing in us like a new form of consciousness.
And it's not stopping.
It's not stopping. It's not stopping. And so now we're beginning at, you know, certainly social media is also
an expression of that, the news, the non-stop news cycle is an expression of that, but no one can
escape anymore. I mean, if anybody has paid any attention to anything, but it's like, where do I go
to like get away? And let me just bring that back to the economy picture I was saying
before. People, even people who are completely so wealthy that they could kind of
extract themselves from all the news and all the things that were happening.
When there were lockdowns, they still experienced limitation and a brushing up against the other. Now, there are probably a few
people in the universe in the world whose money is not, whose wealth is not
measured by money, who probably weren't affected at all. But even the ultra
wealthy had to go through all kinds of hoops that they never had to go through
before. They saw what was happening. They probably knew some people who died. I'm not equating their suffering with the people
who, you know, had 10 family members living in one house and like nine of them died or something
like that. I'm just saying that altering of how we're all connected that happened then
was massive. It also affected because it was massive, it affected the economic realm,
which is why money in some ways is all fucked up right now as well, because the idea that
money was your ticket out of being connected to the all, connected to everybody has been
cancelled.
That doesn't work anymore.
So now that faith in the economic realm has been shaken and is trying to find its new form right now.
Okay, this is, I think another way to put it would be,
I don't care how, like if you're in a swimming pool
and there's an area of the swimming pool reserved
for the elites, if I shit and shallow in,
they're still shit in the pool, baby.
That's right.
That's bad.
You gotta get out.
It's the way it is.
That's what you're talking about.
We're all in the swimming pool.
It doesn't matter if you have some fancies out of the pool.
We are all connected.
I feel like what you're saying is there was a time, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, this is a, this is an Olympus, a planet-sized swimming pool.
And I guess what you're saying is, yeah, pretty soon we're going to start realizing it's a
universe, it's a universe-sized swimming pool, maybe like that.
Right.
And that is going to, if that's going to hurt, if you, if you have the impression that
you're going to be okay, yeah, that you have some parts of the clean in the water, you
know, like, yeah, and there's a sewer,
you know, sewer pipe, like leaking into it.
You know, yeah, there are some people who have,
I suppose there are a few people here and there whose wealth is not just a version of being,
you know, farther down on the deep or shallow end, but it there.
Yeah, but yeah, yeah.
But most people I got you, man.
Yeah.
So, okay, so this isn't evolving.
What we're looking at here,
this is sort of like something,
a process that is unfolding right now
and becoming impossible to ignore.
Yeah, I mean, it's what we should go through. I'm glad we're going through it.
You know, there's a lot that's happening. I mean, this connection to each other through
spirit is, I mean, it's quite incredible. And it can and will be beautiful, but we have to figure out
how much suffering we want to deal with before we access that aspect of it
And I think most people right one of the reasons why I'm teaching the course why I talk about any of the things I talk about
Because I think most people aren't
remotely ready so things end up being
extremely like
traumatizing shock to them after shock after shock after shock and
And then what a lot of spiritual people do to deal with that is just pretend it's not real and do like a what is that a bite of Vidanta is that what you call that like stream of everything's perfect everything's energy everything's energy
I don't call it like that. You don't get that. I know. I mean, you can say everything's perfect.
If you're some enlightened super being in,
but when they're saying everything's perfect,
they don't mean like there's fucking unicorns
bringing cool-aid babies that heal them.
They're saying even within what you're talking about,
there's a form of perfect,
people equate perfection
with pleasure or perfection with no pain,
perfection with no death, perfect, but no.
So no, I know you mean, like that spiritual bypass, right?
You like, you say, essentially everything per,
everything's perfect is either holy fuck fuck you're enlightened and you've absorbed
some total of all suffering and you are then spontaneously declaring that or you're saying
that the way people pull a blanket over their head.
Everything's perfect while someone like a murderer comes into your house with a butcher knife.
Everything's perfect.
Everything's perfect.
So there's two different versions of what you're talking about.
Yeah. And then there are people who can be completely calm through anything because they're psychopaths
You know, so like they've actually like detached themselves from you know a sense of being
Or maybe not detached the mayor. They're born into the same carnation like that and they're on phase because they have no feeling
But those people will just easily, you know come and slit your throat and you know kill you shoot you in the face
Whatever so yeah, and that's that's actually part of I think what's feeling, but those people will just easily come and slit your throat and kill you, shoot you in the face whatever.
That's actually part of what's happening is people are finding some sort of a lure either
to shutting down as much as they can, which won't work, eventually it won't work, or training
themselves into psychopathy.
Yeah.
Whoa, now that, by the way, now that you mentioned that,
guys, I'm giving a class, it's called training yourself
in a psychopathy.
If you don't want to take my old roommates
and feel every fucking thing,
why would you want to do that?
I will numb you down.
So you know what?
So it's like, I think, you know, Christianity,
everybody thinks the crucifixion is over.
And it feels like what you're saying is this,
the crucifixion didn't end.
We're talking about an ongoing crucifixion of Christ
showing up in all of the horror that is manifesting in the world.
But everyone thinks, you know, oh my God, we know it's done, resurrected.
But in this process, since it's like, shit, man, still up there.
And we're all standing around.
Some of us are like laughing our asses off, some of us are
crying, some of us are rolling dice, but it's, we're right, is that, is that the idea? We're, we are
at the base of the cross. We are looking at this being and also to make matters worse, we are
So to make matters worse, we are that being. Yeah.
I think that that's, I think it's important to balance all of that
because, yeah, the crucifixion is done in a sense.
It's done because it was done for us.
That transformative experience happened to the entire earth.
It was an event that happened to and for everybody
on the planet.
So you don't have to be Christian to experience
the benefits of the resurrection and the crucifixion.
and the crucifixion. This episode of the DTFH has been supported by better help. The holidays are about to sledge hammer many of us into a dark smush of sadness.
You know, I actually used to be like that.
The holidays would come around and a skeleton-like invisible hand would
clinch itself around my neocortex and proclaim my amygdala like a satanic piano.
But then I got into therapy and it changed my life. It really did. This was one of
the best things that I ever did outside of having kids, psychedelics,
and of course, finding out about meditation.
It's incredible, it's powerful, and it's nice to balance out your spiritual practice
with some authentic therapy.
If you think of starting therapy, give better help a try.
It's entirely online designed to be convenient, flexible, and suited to your schedule.
Just fill out a brief questionnaire to get matched with a licensed therapist and switch
therapist any time for no additional charge.
Find your bright spot this season with better help.
Visit betterhelp.com slash Duncan to Day to get 10% of your first month.
That's better help H E L P dot com slash Duncan.
So you don't have to be Christian to experience the benefits of the resurrection and the the crucifixion, but that didn't happen just so we could do nothing. You know what I'm like?
That happened because it gave us capacities
to meet challenges that face us.
It's like every time, every time consciousness starts to shift,
it's like the video game where the level boss
just keeps getting harder and harder,
almost seemingly impossible.
Like, I don't know how long I do it
until my muscle memory and like understanding
of the level I'm on, like allows me to overcome it.
And then guess what, there's one after that.
And I have to learn like a completely new technique.
But every time, you know, like the way my friend,
Patrick Kennedy, he's a priest in a Christian community,
but he said like, you know, I know we were just talking about my life.
I was going through some hardship and he said, you know, I know that God
never gives me something that I can handle.
Not that I can't handle, which is what?
What like, you know, right?
It's like, I love it, right?
Right.
Because what's the point? Why would God give you something that you can handle?
Actually God delivers unto you something that you absolutely can't handle. So you have to turn to him.
So that this is by the way you just described hell. Hell is where God only gives you things you can handle.
Right. Exactly.
Totally. That's it.
Yeah.
It's going.
I'm sorry to call you out.
No, no, I mean, that's it.
It's just like we receive things that are absolutely insurmountable.
So the way that we contend with them is actually by turning to our spiritual life.
And when we turn to the spiritual life and our spiritual landscape, but people also just
don't know how to turn there anymore, which is really unfortunate. I'm not... On the one hand, everybody knows how to
turn there, because everybody in their hearts knows the answer. They just do, and the answer is different
for everybody, but on the other hand, we don't really know how to get there in the same way that
other hand, we don't really know how to get there in the same way that we don't know how to read until we know how to read.
I mean, we have a lot to do.
And also, a lot of people see spiritual stuff, but they don't know how to read it.
And those are two very different skills.
So again, it's something that I am trying to offer out of my own kind of meager failed experience
with this kind of stuff, which is nevertheless at least most of a lifetime of trying to contend with
that. Yeah, right. Yeah, like the situation of like wandering being lost, the situation of like
being so lost, you don't even know you're lost anymore. I mean, that's the saddest thing. Like, at least if you know you're lost,
there's like some hope, and I feel what you're saying. It's like, I think some people have
become so transfixed by this, by default reality, which is just the temporary, you know, shared
assessment of phenomena that they think this is it. This is all there is. This is
it. It's such a powerless feeling. It's such a miserable feeling. It's a really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really the thing that comes to like shoving me or wake me up or get me untransfixed, I get mad.
Like that's my first response.
It's like, fuck you, don't you get it?
I'm fucking hanging out with this goblin.
I like the goblin.
The goblin, you don't like the goblin.
Look at his postures.
Look at his oozing postures.
I love popping that goblin zits.
You know, pop my zits.
Don't look at that stupid asshole.
Come here.
Well, there's another one right here. Yeah, so I like so to me like I think what you what you do
Is actually has an element of danger to it in the sense that you you kind of and you mentioned it earlier
You kind of have to like make people uncomfortable at first. You kind of have to like, no one likes to be woken up.
You know what I mean?
Like in what you're talking about
is a methodology of waking people up
from this rotten goblin train or whatever you want to put it.
Yeah, I mean, like no one wants to discover
that the goblin has a hand up their ass
that's like moving their mouth like a puppet. You know what I mean mean it's like, like you just think you're like dilated,
you know, but then you have to like, then you have to pull it out, you know, it's like
and like, I feel that I feel that.
Got to hurt.
Especially if you don't know how to pull out of let a hand slide out of your ass man
That can be very good
A lot of damage our way out. Yeah exactly. Yeah, but that is and also like
In in yourself you have to be
willing to understand that you might miss things and make mistakes
sometimes for a lifetime
might miss things and make mistakes. Sometimes for a lifetime, sometimes for an incarnation, you're gonna fuck that. And you have to be willing to see that and
also not willing to give into it. I mean, it's really not easy. Being human is
the hardest thing for, and it's the hardest thing to do in like the universe really, it's really, really hard.
So first of all, that also can bring a lot of forgiveness and compassion to others when I
realize that. Nobody comes here with an easy ticket ever. So I think, I think when you're
telling people things that are uncomfortable, like you said, when
you're confronting them with, you know, I'm going to maybe, I don't want to see remove
your illusions because I think that that's like the way that very materialistically oriented
and conspiracy theorists people talk like, like, she blew it.
Red poo baby.
Yeah, and I don't, first of all, I don't, I'm not like in
any of those people because they're so, they're materialists.
So it's like, to me, I'm just like, you're just rearranging
the pieces like that's of no interest to me.
What's the truth?
Which is something much different.
But yeah, it becomes extremely uncomfortable. Like, like right now, I'm trying to mostly talk
with people about peace. That is not easy. Right now, I'm trying to talk with people about accessing like real love and peace and compassion, that's not an easy thing to do
because you're confronting and being confronted with all kinds of information and anger and
you know social constructs. The other thing I'll say is also when people try to
think their way out of a situation as I, with the options that are available to them,
they often also think that they're doing something very radical just by choosing the other side.
So, like, capitalism, capitalism, capitalism.
Now the capitalism has entered the lexicon of like a popular way of talking about economy,
actually talking about politics, but thinking they're talking about economy,
it's like, then they're like, well, socialism, socialism's it.
And that is way more radical because they've moved a centimeter
and the moving is very hard, but the distance isn't far.
So, they're actually just a set.
Capitalism and socialism are a set.
And if you move from one to the other,
it is actually a radical move
because you've completely shifted your perspective, but that doesn't mean that they're radical
alternatives. And I know that people, now everybody hates me for saying that. Oh, you did.
I know, but I will. There's a there's a esoteric version of socialism, which I do think is important.
And I do think everybody needs to go through.
And we all need to encounter that.
And that is a real radical shift, which is I'm going to look around like the simplest
way of saying it is I look around the room.
I look at the floor, the books, the door, the wall, the ceiling, and all of those came from someone's
labor and materials that were brought from the earth, and effort, and pain, and strength.
And as soon as I start to actually encounter that in my heart, that actually is, I think,
a real, that's a real basis for understanding a true living socialism that we can help
each other with. But that's not the same thing. It's just turning the dial on how we handle things
economically, you know. Well, you're okay. It's like capitalism is one pillow.
Socialism is the other pillow. It's like in the middle of the night when your pillow gets too high.
You switch pillows. Now I'm dead. You're still asleep.
You just got a new pillow.
And it's going to be cool for a little bit, but then it heats up.
And then not don't, I'm going to do a whole podcast on this.
Like, we'll destroy our lives.
But, you know, what, what, in the conversation of socialism, I like to think about the meta-capitalism
that shows up in the announcement of being a socialist, that in the announcement of being a
socialist, there's all this currency that you accrue from the announcement. So
weirdly capitalism shows up in the conversation about socialism as a meta
level of the whatever the particular alignment that you're doing. There's an
actual value that shows up in a different form
of currency, but currency, that's another podcast.
So, but wait, this is super cool because to me,
what's very exciting about what we always talk about,
and what you remind me of, which I inevitably forget,
is that you don't know all the options
and the more you think you know the options,
the more it's like you're shutting yourself down,
you're closing yourself off,
and you're constricting yourself
into a kind of nightmare situation.
That, that, that, that,
and I love that, just like that moment of like,
oh my God, I'm free. Because that, that it feels, that's and I love that. Just like that moment of like, oh my God, I'm free.
Because that, that it feels, that's what it feels like
you're saying is like, you're free as a bird.
You are so free.
You don't have to, you don't have to be in the,
in the world that you're in.
As you understand it, whoa, man,
that is so, that makes my heart flutter.
But it still scares me for some reason.
It scares?
Yeah.
Well, the, I mean, the, the reflexive response to that,
especially now that I've said something about socialism,
which, let me just also say that I definitely feel
much more affinity with the politics
and economy and socialism and capitalism.
Hold on, let me stop you there. I can see what's on your bookshelf, guys. I definitely feel much more affinity with the politics and economy and socialism and capitalism.
Hold on, let me stop you there.
I can see what's on your bookshelf, guys.
It's all iron, man.
It's like 17 copies of the fountain head.
Yeah, okay, right.
Yeah, exactly.
What the fuck?
Yeah, exactly. What the fuck?
Um, I just think it have like a fountain made out of like copies of the fountain head.
I think that would be really fucking beautiful.
I mean, it's blood.
Yeah, exactly.
Exactly.
Blood fountain.
I look, I, I think like, we have to be careful when we have that freeing feeling that we don't stop there.
Now, that's the accusation that socialists and other leftists generally make against spirituality, and they're right.
They're right about that. They're right about,
oh, you know, people just want to feel free. They want to feel, they want to feel liberated,
but not actually be liberated. Now, I think that that might be a little short-sighted,
because sometimes feeling liberated is enough to actually liberate you. But I do think that that's a real concern.
And I think, I mean, I think I'm fortunate that you can level that against anything,
and you probably should level it against most things, where it's like, you know,
if you want something like universal basic income, you have to want it for like a second
so you can get rid of it and move to the next thing. Like you always want to be trying to do something better instead
of keeping things in stasis. So what does that look like? So that's why, that's why in my course,
but no, it really is why anthroposophy is so interesting to me as a spiritual path or as a spiritual
approach because it's had all these initiatives that have come out of it. So it's not just
that people are doing spiritual development, although that is where the real side of action is,
but it's also that Waldorf schools have come out of it. It's also that biodynamic agriculture
has come out of it and camp hill communities. It's that someone had decided, you know,
Rudolph Steinr basically, because people asked him,
was like, I'm going to try to bring forward
these initiatives into the world.
I'm gonna try to create a different world
with my understanding of spirituality.
And there are lots of people who are geniuses
and one way or another who have tried to do these sorts of things,
whether it's Leonardo da Vinci or Phil Hamreich or, you know,
who tried to bring forward into different realms
of the social organism, what they saw
in a concrete kind of working form.
So that's why I think that all that's very important.
Like I've said, the course is introduction Rudolfstner
and the Western esoteric tradition.
And I keep saying, you know, esoteric Christianity,
because some of the other esoteric Christian thinkers
are just as important to me as Rudolfstiner,
Dos Gloss, and Peter Dunov, in particular,
are quite important to me.
But the initiatives, I think, are something
that shows us some direction and gives us some hope. Like, we could actually do everything
completely differently. And, you know, Rudolph Schneiner is like Alistair Crowley, good people
of the anthropologists would lose their mind to me, even say in the same rep. But like these are two people whose influence has so permeated the world
that we don't actually even think of how profound and curly was one path. And it
mostly permeated Hollywood and entertainment actually through
Scientology and Elrond Hubbard and the Beaterife and so on and so forth. And the
sort of magical world of commanding
the spiritual world. We're a Steiner's contribution, moved into trying to renew all kinds of aspects
of our lives, education and agriculture and religion and even dance and all these other aspects.
It shows up again and again and again.
And people just don't know that that's what it is.
I mean, I named all those people,
but then it's like, you even have things like,
Jarr are token and CS Lewis were really influenced
by this guy at Womens Bar field to work with them.
So Russ Snyder's like, getting into all of that.
Like Jennifer Aniston and Steve John Stevens
went to Waldorf schools.
I mean, I don't know how they think about that experience, right?
But it's gotten in, you know, and so this
primation through, yeah, through the initiatives is really important. And that's
part of why I'm just bringing that caveat against, well, we don't just stop there when we think
of the options. We begin to develop them. And you can't develop it on your own. You have to
meet with other people and begin to develop them. And you can't develop it on your own. You have to meet with other people
and try to develop them together.
Well, let's imagine you're in prison.
I show up to your prison, I say,
Connor, even though you talk shit about socialism,
you're letting me, and that's why you're here.
And that's why you're here for 20 years.
We've actually commuted your sentence,
you're gonna be let out of prison.
Now, I tell you that that's the for that's the liberate.
That's the feeling of liberation.
Holy shit. I'm going to be out of prison.
But then you still have to walk out of prison or you're still in prison.
You can't just stay in prison pretending you're not there because you feel you know that you're there's a possibility of getting out and and that that is
You know, I think the sand trap of a lot of new age self-help
Self-development stuff is that the sand trap is you do realize oh my god
I'm free. There is the possibility for me to be anything I want
Untether myself from all the conditioning live in a
Unimaginable world because the world I live in an unimaginable world, because the
world I'm in is one that I've imagined based on past habits and indoctrination.
And that's where you stop.
You're like, great, cool.
I'm going to stay in my current imagined world.
It sounds like the radical thing about what you're talking about.
And I think you could argue for Crowley too,
is both of them have within them,
and but you do, you gotta do it.
It's not enough to know where the subway is.
You gotta get on the subway.
And in this case, it sounds like what you're saying is,
Steiner was intentionally trying to transform
was intentionally trying to transform the world for the better. And there's proof in what has come out of his teachings.
The world has transformed.
Things are different.
He created earth-shaking change, which means that if you're one of his students, that means that it's not
enough to just feel good, right? There's an action here. It's a verb. Totally. Yeah, I love that way
of putting it. And I think it's, you know, we'll just turn that critique back on anybody in the
political realm as such, like people voted for Joe Biden. And we're like dancing in the streets
when he, are they dancing now? You know, like they were dancing in the streets when he won the
election. Are they dancing now? Like people, you know, try to institute all kinds of social change,
whether it's like I said, universal basic income or gay marriage or things that people believe will be these like completely changing
Initiatives and then they and they stop
As soon as they get them and that's also not good enough. So
That's actually one of the problems with a
Lot of people who are working in Anthroposophy and we've been around China
They are like they want to refer everything back to the time
when he existed and everything that he said and all the
niches without changing them.
So there are people bringing that work forward and that's what's the most
important to me.
And that's why way back in the beginning when we started talking, I kind of
resisted.
I was like, well, I don't even know if I would say I'm an anthroposophist or
a dinerian or something like that because I want to bring it forward. I want to keep working with it and bring it into the
world today. Actually, now I'm going to refer to him. He has this like lecture where he says something like,
kind of messed up the quilt, but it was something like if the Sistine Chapel were you know painted today, we should rightfully laugh at it for being inadequate.
It's like, it's not meeting the time.
Like, even the most beautiful thing
has to meet the time spirit has to meet, you know,
where we are now and the beings that are present with us
and their aims as well.
So, you know, I think this also
has resolved a lot of the critiques of Anthroposophy,
which are, say, it's outdated or a product of its time or confused or, you know what I think this also resolved a lot of the critiques of Anthroposophy, which are say it's outdated or a product of its time or
Confused or you know, I mean, it's like I don't
It's not that's not interesting to me. I want to bring forward what's valuable from it and keep moving and there are lots of people doing that
but unfortunately
One not enough people know about what
Anthroposophy and the Western esoteric tradition embody and it is and two, the people that really do know, a lot of them are
actually holding it back from growth. So it's not, you know, some people have to take up this mantle
and try to work with what's there and bring it forward. You know, so I'm trying to do that.
It sounds very egotistical, but...
No, it doesn't.
Yeah.
It doesn't sound egotistical to me at all.
At all.
It sounds really exciting and authentically liberating
and disturbing in the best way possible.
You know, good disturbing.
Get that goblins hand out of your ass.
That's how you play.
See what other kind of fisting is happening
at this market that we're at.
Connor, I'm so happy to have you as my friend.
I love chatting with you.
Yet again, you have freaked me out, blow my mind.
And I hope that I hope that people
listening who feel the call will take your class because it sounds like a nice
diving board into something that I I think would benefit a lot of people. So how
do they sign up for this thing? Yeah it's pretty easy so I just have a like a
square site where they can sign up.
So my podcast is against everyone with Connor Abbey,
so you can remember it's AEWCH against everyone with Connor Abbey,
which I'll also spend a witch,
AEWCH.square.site.
And the tickets are there.
There's tier.
There's one for 25, one for 40, one for 75.
That's really mostly just a sliding scale. You get a little extra stuff here and there, but I want
people to pay what they feel they can pay. And it's on December, it's on December 2nd, Saturday,
December 2nd at nine o'clock AMPST, noon EST, and then five o'clock, double in time, where I live.
And it's just on line. I'm just going to lead you through some stuff.
There's an extra Q&A that you can sign up for if you want as well, where you can,
well, there'll be lots of discussion because I'm going to run people through some exercises
and we'll talk about it if you want to, you don't have to.
But then there'll be a Q&A for questions that are completely unrelated, like when people want to ask,
like, what did Steiner think about honeybees or you know
Like that kind of stuff we can we can talk about that sort of stuff
afterward if people want
Guys, just you know, I'm gonna do this as a little like
I feel like it's like I have friends
Where if they offer me weed to eat I cut it into fourths
That's when he says he's when I say when his
friends is this is living LSD. I'm telling you. I don't even know what's gonna
happen during the class. But like I'm not being hyperbolic when I say think
about that exercise that one exercise you did with me. Once a week, it just comes back into my mind.
So I don't know what a day is a mega dose.
So great.
And all the links you need to connect
to sign up for this are gonna be at drattrustle.com
if you can't remember that website, Connor.
What a joy.
I can't wait to come out to Ireland with a fam.
Hang out.
I know, man.
I know.
And every time we talk, I just,
I'm glad we have podcasts because it means we can talk.
Because we should talk more.
But I always know that this will come around if we wait long enough.
Because I love you.
And it's great to see you.
Love you.
How do you appreciate it?
Thank you, Connor. Bye, everyone. Howdy Christian, thank you Connor. Bye everyone.
That was Connor a Beef Everybody.
Again, it's Connor a Beef.com.
If you wanna sign up for a cult philosophies
and intro to Rudolph Steiner
in the Western Esoteric tradition,
I hope you will.
Subscribe to my Patreon.
It's patreon.com.
For it's like DTFH and bless you, my dear sponsors for supporting this podcast and my family
and come see me on my dates are at DuncanTrustle.com. There's going to be one more podcast this week
and then I'm going to be out for two weeks to spend some much needed time with my family and my mistress.
I'll see you later on in the week.
Until then, I love you.
Goodbye.
you