Duncan Trussell Family Hour - 641: Ari Matti

Episode Date: October 4, 2024

Ari Matti Mustonen, hilarious comedian currently evading Estonian authorities, joins the DTFH! You can learn more about Ari on his website, AriMatti.com! Original music by Aaron Michael Goldberg and Duncan Trussell. This episode is brought to you by: Squarespace - Use offer code: DUNCAN to save 10% on your first site. This episode is brought to you by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/duncan and get on your way to being your best self. True Classic - Visit TrueClassicTees.com/Duncan and SAVE up to 25% when you buy bundled packs!

In Estonian, would you mind saying today's guest on the DTFH is Ari Mati? He is currently hiding out in the United States because he got in lots of trouble in Estonia. That was perfect! Today's guest on the DTFH is Ari Mati. What could have been the biggest problem for you? But he has been doing stand-up much longer than Kill Tony. Ari Mati is essentially a celebrity in Estonia, and he should be. He is so fucking funny. But even better, what a fantastic podcast guest. The conversation you're going to hear is a true emotional roller coaster.

We've got kidnapping. We've got hand jobs and bogs. Anything anyone would want from a great podcast. And plus, you're going to get to know one of the stars of Kill Tony, Ari Matty. So everybody, please welcome, for the first time on the DTFH, Ari Matty. Hell yeah. Ari. Let's get it. Thank you for doing this. on the DTFH, Ari Matty. Hell yeah.

Ari. Let's get it. Thank you for doing this. Of course, my friend Duncan. Man, I gotta tell you, you know like, you've got a buzz, man. Like, so, no you do, and it's so cool. Like, you know, you know a comic's getting a buzz

when you're out on the road, and people come up to you, and they mention you. They've been to Austin, they saw you and like, he is so funny. So I've been thinking about our conversation today and I've just been thinking how absolutely weird it is that a comedian from Estonia makes his way from Estonia to Thailand? Is this the route? Was it Estonia, Canada, Thailand, or Estonia? No, it was Estonia.

Well, first of all, when I tried stand-up, I didn't even know. I didn't know stand-up the way it was. I don't know how you, like what was your first exposure to stand-up? I needed a job. Oh, it was a kid, Bill Cosby, Bill Cosby, record. My dad had Bill Cosby.

Yeah, record. For me, it was, I wanted to download Eddie Murphy's Beverly Hills Cop on peer to peer service, LimeWire. Oh yes. Remember LimeWire? Yes, of course. And then sometimes, you know, there's peer to peer, they would just put a fucking fake audio file, you know?

And I would be like, oh, 17 megabytes. Oh, that's gonna fit on my computer. Of course, that's not enough for a movie. And it was like Eddie Murphy's Delirious, and only the audio. And it was the fucking Gooney Goo Goo or whatever. And I remember even as a kid, like laughing, but not knowing why is there an audience? How is it even done? Like, not even knowing that it's a theater stage or a gig or a comedy.

And all the references. And then I remember, even from, did you guys have Kazaa? It was like a peer to peer. I kind of recall Kazaa as some kind of secondary thing, but we were all using limewire over here. And then I remember I downloaded Dave Chappelle's, with the crack baby. How old are you? This is like fucking 14, 13 maybe.

The crack baby, you know, hey baby, you know the baby on the corner selling crack. And I mean, I'm a suburban Estonian kid. What do I know about the projects? Also this is in English that I don't even speak. But the talent exceeds the connection that we have to have. Like I don't know the references he's giving, but the way he's delivering it is already funny. Yeah, right. You're getting that... like you see this in a lot of art too.

A lot of art. Which is something comes through the medium that transcends the medium and you connect to it. Like when I was 18, I used to work at a jazz club. I was a bouncer. No, nothing about jazz, literally. I'm mentally, no, I don't know how to draw. I don't know how to play any instrument.

It's magic. When I see somebody playing an instrument, you might as well, I've tried and I just don't have it. I just can't, you know, some guys can just do the guitar and you're like, did you go to school? They're like, no, I just fiddled. Fiddled, you know. Yeah.

Bastard. And I remember I worked at this jazz club, also knowing nothing about music. And we had like some Estonian celebrity, he's like a white guy, there was Blues Mondays and he would do the unplugged verse, he was a rock star, really talented guy, classically trained, really classically trained, great concerts, packed, people rock and you know, but then once a month we would get a visitor

and like one Monday I remember I saw some guy from, he was from New Orleans, 70 years old, missing an eye, smoked his whole life, three teeth left. And maybe 40 people in the crowd, about 20 of them were crying. And I remember like watching him perform and the connection, because he's putting his whole soul into that. That's where blues comes from. He's from the, he's from where it actually is. Whereas the white guy, Tunnel, he would lala, he sang blues like, like, aha, you know. Still, I couldn't differentiate technically. A musician friend of mine who I got to hang out there, he of course told me, no, no, no, what Tunnel is doing is the basic one, two ABCs. Somebody explaining stand up like, oh, this is what he's doing. He's doing the hack fucking ta-ka-ta-ta-ta. But then the other guy, he's fucking blending art forms.

But I didn't know that technically, but my soul picked up on it. You know? Right. Same thing with that Eddie Murphy and fucking Dave Chappelle thing. And then I was like 20 years old. I moved to Melbourne, Australia.

Okay, why? For a girl. Oh, okay, wait. Now, before we get into the Melbourne, the Melbourne move, okay. So, I realized that I knew nothing about Estonia today. Of course, nobody knows. So, I started looking into it.

Holy shit! Holy shit. Nothing like what I thought it was. Holy shit. So Estonia has the fastest internet, like on the planet, right? It has incredibly fast internet. You can vote online in local elections, which is insane, in this insane, in the sense it's obvious we should be doing that. And God knows what this country would be like if we found a way to vote online versus like the way we do it here. They don't have to get a bank account here

and they're like, come into the office. I'm like, the office? You have offices? Yeah. I made the login. Yeah, so you can, everything can be done online everything and also Estonia produces the most supermodels of any other country in the world per capita so you have this like brah beautiful, yeah, beautiful population and

Way more women way more women than men you have this like beautiful, beautiful population and way more women than men. Something like 85 women per 50 men or something. Oh, there it is. Oh yeah, 73.88 models per million inhabitants. Most people do not know that models from Estonia are one of the most valued models in the fashion world. It's just crazy. So-

Because we got raped by everybody, the genetic pool. That's the dark side. You guys- My baby blue eyes come from Viking raping. Yeah. So. Yeah. You were, so, and that is another question I have for you

before you get to, like, have you done genealogy on yourself? Do you know where it goes back to? We can't even do that, you know, because, yeah, I know Americans can, because you all have your records. We got bombed by every country. Every country? Yeah, yeah. Germany, Russia.

I'm half Finnish, half Ukrainian. You've been invaded by? Everybody. How many times you were invaded by Germany? Three times? Twice? Yeah, and then Middle Ages. Maybe somebody came through. Many times. Russia. And then, and I'm sorry to mansplain to you about your own country,

but I know a lot of people probably watch and might not know much about Estonia. The most insane thing that I stumbled upon was that you pulled off a nonviolent singing revolution. Yeah, singing revolution, yeah. Can you tell me about that? So there's the Baltic chain from... So the Baltics are Estonia, Latvia, Lithuania. So we all held hands from Lithuania to Estonia, and we just sang the Russian Army. Well, to be fair, let's just say, the Soviet Union was collapsing anyway, and we just kicked the guy while he's down

and sang a little nice song, you know? It wasn't exactly like they were at the prime, you know? Okay, so yeah, okay, well, that was still though. Like, I have never heard. Also, when a regime collapses, I've always wondered this, you know, it's like, because there's a Russian, there were tanks everywhere, you know? Yeah. you know. And, you know, when you're under a regime, you're on a tank, you're a soldier, you have your superiors. But when a regime collapses,

it's like when a business shuts down, they never tell you, oh, next week we're gonna shut it down. You know, so for all these soldiers to imagine you're in a fucking country that you've invaded you're on you're doing the Lord's work as you think yeah, and then one point you call nobody picks up and now you're just a guy on a tank You know What do you do? Well? What do you do is you sell you know all these American businessmen came over by the helicopters the submarines the fuck and thanks Yeah, fire sale just all over over and just scoop it up. Because you have a tank now.

Holy shit. So, okay. So, your population is just a crazy genetic amalgam of so many different. And culturally, you know, because we have our own language, we have our own history, but we got oppressed. So culturally also, okay,

maybe the only upside of the Soviet Union, at least what happened in Estonia was we have so many fucking theaters. Beautiful. A town of 1000 people has an 800-seater. Beautiful. Because that's what the Soviet, if you're a fucking dictatorship, what the Soviets did really correctly was, you need to control culture, right? You need to control, you need to entertain people, you need to get them out into a theater. Because you need to give them culture.

Because people will be, that's how you really control people. It's not with the money and the guns, you have to control their mind. That's why I went like, I read a really interesting article about a teacher in America who went to North Korea. She thought that she's going to plant the seed of doubt into the students, but she goes over there and she writes this article about how she goes over there and she understands

that holy shit, she can't even plant the seed if there's no even model of behavior in the children where they're like, why is that? They've never even asked that question. So she had to start from the ABCs. So the same thing with Russia is you have to control subculture too. Because if you lose control of culture, people are going to make some witty songs, people are going to make songs like, fight the power, the riffs are going to be fire. You need to keep people from riffing.

Yeah, that's the scary thing about what's happening right now. You've got like in the United States, you've got like Hillary Clinton talking about like shutting Kamala Harris, talking about like shutting down Twitter. You have like all the stuff that you need to do. Because it all starts from the open mics. That's right. Some guy goes, hey, why do we gotta go and fucking fuck the coupons of bread, you know?

And then some people are like, yeah, I mean, yeah. Yeah, man. So what Russia did, they hold, they control everything, every theater play, so you control the subculture, the subconscious, you need to keep the subconscious under control, that's how you control a fucking person. Okay, so I interviewed Yakov Smirnov, and he was- My OG, I love this guy, he's texted me.

Of course, I mean, I'm the new, this is passing over the course. Yeah, I guess it is. He's the OG. He's the OG, and he told me that he would have to go into like a ministry of comedy or entertainment and give them his set list. Of course. And they would read his jokes and stamp it

and say, you could do these jokes for a year. Of course. And then you've got to come back and present your new joke. Of course. That level of control, it's terrifying. So when you have a small country that's been invaded and you have all these theaters, so the theater culture exists,

so people still go out by the Soviet influence, of course. So we have this theater, we have this beautiful. But then, of course, the resentment starts seeding into the people. And then in 1991, the Union collapses. Now, all this explosion of oppression from music, comedy, sketches, because... This episode of the DTFH has been brought to you by the HTML Angels over at Squarespace. Squarespace is an ever-evolving hyperdimensional technological Swiss army knife slash toolbox that gives you everything you need to make incredible websites.

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of a website or a domain. Again, it's squarespace.com forward slash Duncan, offer code Duncan to get 10% off your first order of a website or a domain. Thank you, Squarespace. ["Square Space"] In order to have a big release of culture, you need to have a lot of tension. Right. You know, that's why comedy is killing, you need to have a lot of tension.

That's why comedy is killing in America right now. A lot of tension. Same thing. And imagine that release of culture. We have amazing music. When Stand Up started, me and another guy who I'm recording the podcast later, Sander, we were the first Estonians, were part of the first. There were five, six guys about.

But that need of like, because the remnants of the Soviet occupation and the old regime still stayed. It's not like a regime collapses and we're all new people now. Takes 10, 15 years for the palette to clear out. And really, because even now, people are still like, oh, you're cursing on television. That's not the older generation. But it just needs to clear out. And when I would watch television as a kid,

I would see all these sketches, the husband comes home, hello, my dear. Who says hello, my dear, to their wife? You hate her. You've been married for 30 years, you have a cunt of a kid. If you're married for 30 years, you don't even talk to your wife. This is a roommate that's annoying. So we would watch this and all the young people, my generation, we would all be like, we're

not getting entertained by this. So then when YouTube comes around, stand-up comedy comes around, now we have this platform to be like, fuck everything. So there's really a surge. comedy comes around. Now we have this platform to be like, fuck everything. Yeah. You know, so. Wow. So there's really a surge. I mean, I went from our open mics.

I mean, I've done open mics in front of a thousand people when we started doing open mic. That is crazy. Open mic, 1,000 people. Well, that's interesting because, you know, that's Kill Tony has become the open mic for millions of people. Absolutely. The most insane form of open mic ever.

So that was almost familiar terrain for you. Yeah, kind of, yeah. And I remember I went into the theater, cause I started anyway, went from Melbourne for a girl, started there, learned about the actual comedy because before I just taught the Eddie Murphy, Dave Chappelle. In my head, I thought I'll do, I'll get UFC middleweight title,

might pick up the light heavyweight, might fuck John Jones on the way. That was in my head. I was like, I'll do that. And then on the side, maybe an HBO, a little special. I'm funny, I kill at the Jiu-Jitsu gym. So you had, and I think that's an important thing, by the way, to have that kind of delusion.

If you have that nice, healthy delusion, it can get you further than not. Like you don't want to go into it fully understanding the probability of anything happening at all. That's a good and also probably martial arts helps to wait. Okay, Melbourne, this girl, you met her in Estonia. I met her backpacking to Southeast. I used to be a big backpacker. Okay. And okay, another thing I read about Estonia, like it's all bogs and forests. A lot of bogs. Massive forests and bogs. So probably since you were...

Quiet. And you went out there with your folks? Yeah, of course. Quiet. So then, okay. Nothing like the ocean air, the breeze, the bog, the silence. The ocean air, the breeze, the bog, the silence. Why, wait, bogs, you know, when I hear bog, I don't think beauty, like I think quicksand pits. It's amazing.

I don't know, I've been in marshes. Think of a bog during winter when it freezes and a coat of snow, you know, and snow is sound isolating. You can hear your heartbeat when you're sitting alone in a forest in Estonia, you know? That's how quiet it gets. Can you pull up an Estonian bog, please? I'd love to see that.

And I, gee, and you're alone there. See. Look at us. Yes. In your thoughts. That's beautiful. When I think bog, I think like Lord of the Rings, Mordor, it's more like a marsh.

I've fingered a girl. Yep. All right, can you zoom in on that? Can you zoom in? Is there a wayered a girl. Can you zoom in on that? Is there a way to zoom it? Can you zoom in on that Josh? Make that bigger. Let's see where he fingered the girl. Okay, there we go. Ten reasons to visit a fog. Ari Matty fingers girls in this fog. Where?

At this part, there's a place where you can go for a swim. I fingered her. You go in that little pool there, and there's not place where you can go for a swim. You go in that little pool there and there's not a lot of people walking around, right? No, no, no, no. You have a view of the path in case someone's coming. Oh, yeah, it's beautiful. So you're just in this bog fingering some Estonian model. Exactly.

What a life in silence. You can hear everything. Exactly. What a life. In silence. You can hear everything. Oh, the sound of fingering. So when you walk through a bog in Estonia, you probably, you can hear other people being fingered, like in the distance. In the distance, maybe. The moaning, the squirting. Well, it wasn't a lot of moaning.

A lot of the bogs in Estonia are squirt. I read that. It's like not even natural water. That's how we got them. Our models just are squirt. I read that. It's like not even natural water. That's how we got them, yeah. Our models just keep squirting. God, that's amazing. Yeah. Okay, so you've, now you're backpacking and you meet your, is this your first true love?

She, see, this is the thing. I was maybe 20, but she was 25. And you know, women mature much quicker. Yes. And she's also American, but she was 25. And you know, women mature much quicker. And she's also American, but she's like, she's got a Mexican mother. She's like insane. And she's artistic. And she was the first person when,

I still was doing my MMA thing, you know. But let's just say the first year, you know, I had all that delusion. The first year I went 0-3 in MMA and started bombing at open mic. So reality came calling. But she really opened me up just creatively. She was like, you're not a fighter. You're the funniest guy I've met. You're a funny guy. Why don't you do this shit? And then randomly we just move across the street from a comedy club

in Melbourne. I got my like a temporary one year work visa. I went to an open mic, a workshop, you know, just to find out what this art form is. We fell in love. My visa ran out. Our pass went in different directions because I really found out I want to do comedy. I would say within two months, there's a good friend of mine that I still talk to who I started with like in Melbourne. He still says that, holy shit,

I saw you do your first open mic ever in your life. And you came off stage, I don't remember this, but he keeps telling me the story. He goes, I go, so what do you want to do in comedy? And I went, I want to go all the way. And he was like, well, okay, that's weird thing to say after your first balmy, and I was balmy. Yeah.

But you found your calling. Yeah, I just felt, I just felt like I want to do something. And it was powerful enough. Just powerful enough. You left your love for comedy. Exactly. And that was the first sacrifice in the altar of comedy. That was the first one you had to,

and it is such a demanding God, isn't it? It wants everything. This guy wants my mind and my body, huh? Everything. Yeah, I know, yeah. Everything. That must've been brutal though, because she kind of like was the one who inspired you.

She was sort of your muse. 100%. And then because of that. 100%. You still talk to her? Absolutely. We still talk. She's still backpacking somewhere and fucking scamming people in Bali or something. I don't know. She's insane. Wish I love her. Scamming? You know, she's got like government benefits from Australia and Mexico. Well, the whole backpacking culture,

when you run into it, you have to come up with tricks. I'm like a pretty conservative, suburban kid from Estonia and she would teach me how to steal. She would be like, we steal from the corporates. I'm like, what do you mean? She's like, if you go to self checkout at a Whole Foods, fuck them. Don't pay.

Take all the cash. So she's like kind of a communist. Kind of. Yeah, she's like that new, I don't know if it's a new form of hippie communist. Rationalizes theft because the corporations are stealing from the employees anyway. Exactly.

So why not get free food? Exactly, I remember we need speakers for my birthday party. We need speakers for the party and we put them through as carrots on the self checkout. Put the carrots. Brilliant. Yeah.

I mean, I imagine that they are losing so much money, but they're still breaking even by not having to pay people. Not even breaking even, they're still making so much money, but they're still breaking even by not having to pay people. Not even breaking even, they're still making so much money. They know, they know they're being ripped off. Because even the, because the thing is, if you hire a security guard, this guy has to now fight a homeless lady.

That's gonna be a lawsuit, that's gonna be a thing. Fuck the security, take what you want, we're making so much money. We're fucking privatizing water in Sierra Leone. Go take that fucking speaker. Yeah, go ahead. I don't give a fuck, dude. Who fucking cares?

These children built this speaker. We have kids building the speaker and we're privatizing water. Oh, wow. So, yeah man, you, so you, okay, so now it's starting to make sense. So that was it. You got bitten by the comedy vampire.

And you are now transforming a comedian. And so you went back to Estonia? Yeah, I did every, so I went to Thailand to also, I did some kickboxing there and I started featuring for a couple of guys who did the Southeast circuit. There was the Bangkok comedy club. That was very nice to me. I did some gig in Malaysia, Kuala Lumpur. I did Myanmar, Cambodia What language were you doing? English English English? Yeah. Okay, so, you know, I started in English

This is insane because like if you were to make a list of the most improbable Careers, no, this is all insanity probable careers. No, this is all insanity. MMA is crazy. And also, I started learning from comedy from my friend who's like, hey, do you know, because we watch UFC and Pride, Pride, you know, the organization, not the gay stuff.

I know what you mean. I was watching the organization and he goes, hey, on Ustream, there's this guy. He goes, there's this guy, you know, the commentator, Joe. And I go, oh, you mean the Rogan guy, the commentator? He goes, yeah, on Ustream, he has a show that he just talks. And I'm like, what the fuck is this shit? Tune into episode six. It's like Tom Segura, Joe Rogan, Brian Redban on the couch. I know Redban and Joe are my friends. That's like insane.

Is that weird? That must be so strange. And I'm on a beach in Thailand listening and that's how I'm finding out about comedy about writing bits. You got to... I'm like, huh, okay, I see. You know, my wife told me that when she was in high school, she would listen to Rogan with her boyfriend. And it's just a strange thing to think she probably heard me yapping. 100 percent. And it's so bizarre. I remember hearing, did you do, this was like in the news, did you do a podcast with your mother? Yeah. Yeah,

that was a big one. Yeah. That was a big, I remember, listen to that one. That was powerful. Yeah, man. I mean, it's such a, I mean, this thing where we're all connecting in a new way, I mean, based on like the evolution of our species, this strange ability to have these connections with people. And you've never had a conversation with them, but you know them. And then you meet them sometimes, and then you have to overcome the vertigo or something

of like actually like becoming friends with him because you already kind of felt like you were friends with him, but now you are. It must, and you opened up for his Netflix special, right? I mean, so that's fucking nuts. Like that storyline of. Yeah, your storyline is so wild to me because like, I guess you must have amazing parents

because I'm trying to imagine. Horrible. Really? Ask me about my parents. How are your parents? Everyone's dead. They're dead? No, my mom was actually a sweetheart, but she died, yeah.

Like three or four years ago. I'm sorry. No, that's fine. Sorry. That is still, like most parents are not gonna be, like if you come to your parents like, well, you know, I think I'm gonna start pursuing professional fighting.

Most parents aren't going to support that. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. See, that- Did yours support that? I just had a stepdad, drunk, kind of violent, not too bad. Nothing like fuck me under the bridge or something. Nothing real bad, but just unstable. And I think that's how my backpacking got started too, maybe just, you know. Get out of there.

Just change your environment. I love changing my environment. I'm almost addicted to it. You're a traveler. You're the like prototypical European traveler that anytime like I've gone out, like to India or whatever, we run into you guys. But we're always going home.

You guys aren't going home. You're just, you're timing your travels by the monsoons. You know those intersections in India where everybody's going, yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm the guy having the coffee with my legs crossed. Just enjoying the chaos. Yes, it's so cool.

That's been my life. And that is an outsider life. That is the extreme outsider life because you're watching tourists like me with our dumb backpacks, confused, having fun. You know, we're not the real thing. We're just there to get a little taste of something different.

And then you all kind of flock together too. Generally you'll run into like groups of Australian backpackers, you know what I mean? Israeli backpackers. And they're just, they're not tied down the way most people are to the world. And it seems like this has been your story. It must be because you're an Estonian in Texas.

You're an Estonian. No fucking, it's a weird stop on whatever your trip is. But that was my first girlfriend really because before I was kind of a suburban kid that still had this obsession of control and fucking I had my stuff. This is my stuff, this is my stuff. I don't fucking I have my stuff. This is my stuff. This is my stuff. You know, I don't want nobody touching my stuff. And I remember we got robbed in

a hostel with that girl. We got robbed. And immediately in my controlling, also young man, so you kind of have to protect your girl. You have all these structures in your head that you're trying to, you know, I'm supposed to be the guy. Somebody took my stuff. So immediately I'm almost having a meltdown when we walk into the room. Her first time that she looks at me goes, oh, all her shit is gone. I guess less responsibilities. Yeah, wow. And it really took me a year with her to really learn about,

yeah, dude, the less stuff, the better. All I need is my mind. All I need is just to be me. Yeah, everything else is just like a stage, background, nothing, you don't care. But it is, you know, it's so easy to get attached to stuff, your house, the sentimental feelings around stuff that if you didn't have it for a week,

you'd never think about it again. Oh, yeah, absolutely. It's so... But what a trap. I mean, talk about an actual bog. How many of us are just glued to this bog of matter? And the idea of setting out into the world the way that you have, it sounds like a movie or something. It doesn't sound like- Because a lot of guys my age, when I started back, I can remember talking to my friends back home,

I would visit them and be like, why don't you come to Thailand with me? They're like, it's fucking $5,000. I could have a new fucking BMW for that. And I was like, BMW? Or you could have the experience of crossing a river in India. That experience is gonna stay with me my whole life.

I don't wanna sit in this BMW. I know, you're not gonna think, like, yeah, I don't spend a lot of time thinking about cars that I have leased, but boy, I think about Varanasi all the time. I think about that girl, Shanae, once a week, just of the experience we shared. I think of Varanasi all the time. I think about that girl, Sinead, once a week. Just of the experience we shared. I think of Varanasi, of course, I think about Bali.

I think about fucking almost getting kidnapped in Myanmar. Of course, those experiences. You almost got kidnapped? How close? I sat in a car. I needed to get across from Thailand to Cambodia. There's an area there that's, they have tons of casinos. Nobody owns, it's like no man's land, you know?

So it's terrible. Everybody's trying to scam each other off. The last bus left, so I'm alone, white kid, and I'm the only white kid. And it's one of those times in the night where it's about 2 a.m. and everybody's turn, I can hear conversations about me being there. So you know something's gonna happen.

Really nice guy with like an old Mercedes stops by. He goes, you wanna ride to Siem Reap, which is where I was going in Cambodia. It's a fucking six hour drive, but I'm European. So I'm like, you know, people are nice. So I sit down in his back seat and then he stops, maybe 20 yards away he stops. Some other guy gets in the front seat next to him. He has a gun and immediately my head I go oh, it's gonna be rape city. I'm gonna get raped but everything everything is gonna happen

Yeah, but the weird thing is you will think That you having immediate panic, but there's something I remember I was really calm for some reason because you have to make rational decisions, you have to be very careful what you say, you know. And the driver turns back, he goes, we're not going to see anybody, you know, starts off that and in my head I'm like, okay, cool. The doors lock, click, takes, goes into an alley, and then they both turn around and start talking to me and I'm I can't even remember the conversation because I'm literally having a meltdown but at the same time

totally calm. Okay can I stop you there because I think you just came up with the best idea for a podcast which is you kidnap Europeans and you just pull off you have the gun doors like listen we just want to interview you for an hour That would be incredible man. So yeah, I guess you're just like thinking okay I'm I'm you only think they wanted to rape you no, but just all the thoughts are going right I'm like, oh, they're gonna cut my limbs sell my dick more like we're gonna sell your dick Yeah, they're gonna sell my dick on the black market keep some for later, you know, keep my balls boil my balls for grandmother Yep, they're gonna sell my dick on the black market, keep some for later, you know, keep my balls, boil my balls for grandmother. Yep.

They're gonna sell all my organs. Estonian balls. Then get all of my money from my mother, you know, get your son back, then I can send my year to my mother as a warning. They're gonna do the whole package, you know. Yes. Yeah. So, and they're talking, they're asking, what are you doing when you're going?

And I'm just telling them I missed the bus, you know, I was fucking in between the dead zone there. I missed the bus, you know, I was fucking in between the dead zone there. I missed the bus, whatever. And then they both look at each other and they go, they literally audibly go, they talk whatever, whatever the fuck they talk. And they go, ah, and the door's unlocked. And they go, get the fuck out.

Just cause I, what they were doing is how much money, how much trouble this is. Oh yeah, you were just some broke backpacker. They were hoping that you were like. My baby blue eyes say I'm gonna call dad and he's gonna come in a private jet. There's no money, your stepdad isn't getting shit. But my accent says clearly, there ain't no dad.

Oh, that groan of disappointment when you realize you've kidnapped somebody who has no money, that's gotta suck, man. You're getting so excited. And that groan tells you a lot, because it's like, that's probably like, this is the second time tonight we've picked up someone who's like- Exactly, asshole.

Then I go to a hotel. ["Sweet Home Alone"] This show is sponsored by BetterHelp. Friends, Halloween's coming up. I know you're already picking out your mask. I know I'm picking out mine. I'm going to go as an old school executioner and I'm getting a prosthetic Spider-Man head that I'm going to carry around. Guess what my kid's going as?

Headless Spider-Man! How cool is that? It's going to be great. I'm sure the neighbors are going to love it. But you know, you put a mask on and it's weird. Honestly, sometimes you become that character. I don't know if you ever noticed that. I'm a neurotic never-nude, so anytime I have a mask on, I just feel better. But the more you wear the mask, it's weird how easy it is to just turn into an executioner

who decapitated Spider-man or whatever your particular mask is what I'm getting at here is a lot of us don't realize we put a mask on a Long time ago. We were getting bullied our parents were We're freaked out. So we had to put on some mask so that would so that we were safe and and and it's the saddest thing It's like I don't know, it was a terrible, it's my least favorite Halloween, but the one where the masks melt in their face. This can happen to you! Suddenly you're wearing the mask of some cool kid

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not for our emotions. I've benefited so much from therapy. I know that's a cheesy thing to say, but truly, there's a lot of things that have helped me not be a raging, selfish monster. Psychedelics, meditation, but of all of them. Therapy really like grounded me. You know, it's easy to go flying off in the astral realm on mushrooms or whatever. My god, I'm sorry. I hope that's okay to say. Better help. I'm not advising, better help is not advising that you use psychedelics. This is just me for a second. And it's fun.

Meditation not so much. But my point is you need to ground yourself too. And that's what therapy will do. We are in the world, friends. We have to deal with our relationships, our jobs, all the real Earth realm stuff. You find a wonderful therapist and I'm telling you, you will enter into a new life. If you're a hardcore cynical neurotic like I used to be, I know you're rolling your eyes right now, but I'm telling you, it's worth a shot. So if you're thinking of starting therapy, give BetterHelp a try.

It's entirely online, designed to be convenient, flexible, and suited to your schedule. You just fill out a brief questionnaire to get matched with a licensed therapist, and you can switch therapists anytime for no additional charge. Take off the mask. With BetterHelp, visit betterhelp.com slash duncan today to get 10% off your first month. That's BetterHelp. Thank you, BetterHelp. Again, BetterHelp is nowhere in the copy. Is there anything about mushrooms or meditation? But they do say improvise. But I feel like they would want me to say that's coming from your old friend Duncan, not BetterHelp. But they are great. I mean, you know, set and setting.

It'll be a day. I'll forget it. Just forget the mushroom part. BetterHelp, thank you. Where they administrate, and I'm, at this moment I'm like I gotta get out of here but there's nothing I just have to get off that street everybody's looking at me I saw like I saw a lady take a shit in her hand throw it at some old American man. Why did you get a sense of what drove her to that moment? Was he being a dick or why did, or she's just bored? I don't know what the fuck was happening.

I go into this hotel, the administrators are already like, cause it's like, yeah, so apparently there's casinos, hookers, everything, and there's all these, the only white people I would see would be old American men that are just, it's just a creepy place. And a lot of dirt, the cars, everything. So going to this hotel, immediately the administrator, and I find out at the hotel, I crossed the border illegally. I was looking for the toll booth. But it's crossed. She's like, oh, you didn't do the thing. And she's like, we're not really a hotel.

We're basically, you bang hookers here and you go home. And she goes, sure. I'll give you a room in the communal. I had such little money, of course. So I get a room in the communal hostel before I go to bed. She goes, Hey, just put your passport in your pants and tie your backpack to your leg so if they try to steal it, you can at least fight them. This is before I could try to take us. Before I tried to go to sleep.

So of course I'm just with my backpack, in my like sitting there like this. I'm in a hostel, in the bottom bunk, on the top bunk, some dude is going to town on a whore and I'm along for the ride. Cause it's a bunk bed, you know, you're like, it's like somebody's driving a motorcycle but you're in the sidecar.

Was it hot? Did you get kind of turned on? No, no, no. Old 45 year old man with missing teeth. Okay. And now probably a 10 year old girl. Oh, fuck, okay, right. So that's a sad ride.

You're at the ride to hell. That's a sad ride. I don't wanna take this ride. It's a terrible ride. I don't need a nap, dude. It's been a day. So with my backpack tied to my leg, I'm like, oh my God, and I can feel it. I can feel him coming.

And then the morning I go to the administration, I'm like, I'm gonna, you know, I've been fucking witnessing rape and prostitution. I haven't slept. So I go to the administration, I go like, I gotta get to Siem Reap and I gotta get out of here. Because the reason I took it with the famous train route from Bangkok to Siem Reap, it takes three days. You take a cargo train and it's like an amazing journey.

It pays $5. You're on a cargo train where people sell you a shower. You know how they sell you a shower? They have the little backpack with all the drapes. No! What? And you stand on the car because with all the drapes. No! Yeah. What? And you stand on the car, because the cargo train never stops.

So you stand there, a guy puts like a drapes around you, and then he just pours water and you pay him one American dollar. That's a shower you take on that train. Oh, I bet it feels good though. Oh, hell yeah, it feels good. Because the cargo train is, all the dust has come out, all the windows are open, there's no air conditioning. Okay, here's my train story in India.

I thought I was being fucking clever. Because in India, I don't know what it's like on those trains. In India, they don't have the same sense of personal space that we have here. So they'll sleep on you. They'll just like, you're like a recliner to them or something. So you're just crammed into this car because I don't know, like I think we'd read somewhere, if you want the real Indian train experience,

don't do the first class cars, like go in the back. And like, you know, it's still incredible. Like my friend had hash that he had gotten in New Delhi, or Dharamsala, and like you'd sit and smoke hash and look out the train and But you know, I was just like I saw this empty place to sit Yeah, and i'm like i'm gonna sit there, you know, and i'm sitting there for a little bit and then Oh shit, what I guess I spilled my water And you know my pants are starting to get wet. It's piss

Just flowing out of the bathroom and that's why nobody was sitting there because it's like piss roll flowing out of the bathroom. And that's why nobody was sitting there because it's like piss, roll. So now I've got like Indian train piss soaked into my fucking pants. And there is no shower person there. You're just gonna have piss, like Indian train piss on your pants

for the remainder of the trip, which is a long fucking trip to smell like other people's piss. But that's what backpacking teaches you you have to just accept the loss of control. Absolutely. Yeah, what are you gonna do? What are you gonna do?

Get off the train? Yeah, you can't. You're in the middle of nowhere. It's done. The decision is done. It's done. The path is chosen. Surrender.

Yeah. Wow, man. And then I leave them. So in the morning, I go see him, the lady goes, the first train leaves Monday, and it's like Saturday. And I'm like, I can't. And she's literally like, oh, I might have somebody.

A car pulls up. It's a family of Mongolians. How many Mongolians are in the car, tell me? It's a five seater. I'm gonna go eight? Six. So I'm the seventh person in the car. I have a Mongolian child on my lap.

Wow. And we go for a six hour drive to Siem Reap with these Mongolians. And they don't have passports, they're just going there for work or something. Only one of them, like a kid. This is the young kids on my lap. I have to... No, no, no, no, no, no, him. And the other kid, the other kid is here.

And she's the only person speaking a little English. And I start drinking their vodka made of fucking corn, like corn vodka or some shit that the Mongolians do. And they're all bloated and red because they drink this vodka. And we just drive and I'm just laughing. We take stops and I just get hammered. And then at some point at night,

we just get to see Amrith, they say bye. No phone, no, what's your IG? Just never see you again and bye. You know what we should do? You know, man, this life here, why don't we just go? Yeah. I've got some money in the bank,

let's just get some backpacks and get the fuck out of this country. What do you say? We'll disappear. I can't shave my head anymore. I'll shave my beard. No one will know. No one will know shit, though.

And we'll get the fuck out of here, get back on the road again. You become travelers again. Don't you feel that? Just that story. Of course. The pendulum from what sounds like a level of hell. Like it sounds like a level of hell.

Like it sounds like if you were describing a hell realm, that's what you were in, to suddenly you're in paradise. It's some kind of like incredible heavenly experience. Wow, man. And then I go to see him reap, and I'm having a cocktail at the hostel that has a small pool. Then a German girl blows me the night that arrived

I'm gonna cry. What do we do? Almost got kidnapped raped butt fucked organ donor. I just watched molestation. You had great crazy hot golly vodka And then and then like just like a kiss from God at the end. Hey, how about this? How about a German blowjob? Just to wrap it up for the last couple of days. And you know what, maybe a fucking, during that same trip, I did a gig in Siem Reap, because this was when I was already doing comedy

a little bit, a little bit, a little bit. I was like featuring for an American guy. You know who was in the audience? Who? Ari Shaffir. Of course. Because he was backpacking during that time. Of course he was!

Of course it's Ari Shaffir! Had to be! Of course it's Ari Shaffir. Of course. Because he was backpacking during that time. Of course it was! Of course it's Ari Shaffir! Had to be! Of course it's Ari Shaffir! And I'm doing my set bombing by it on his hack. And I look, it's Ari Shaffir. And I remember thinking, I think that's Ari Shaffir. And then meeting him, and we just smoked a joint. And he went to his hostel, I went to my hostel. Because you know, like, what you just described, sounds like a dream. Yeah, yeah, for sure. I mean, that's the kind of dream I'd wake up from

and just, ahree in the audience while I'm bombing and the blow job was cool and I almost died. And you know, to me, that, what you just described is probably more what life is supposed to be like than the way it is if you just described, is probably more what life is supposed to be like than the way it is if you have locked yourself into some pattern. And right now I have to lock myself in, I got kids. Me too.

I don't have kids, but I'm in a pattern, of course. You have to. Of course. You have to go through- I'm trying to achieve something. Yeah, you have to. Sacrifice. You have to sacrifice that, but wow, man.

That is, that's Jack Kerouac. You have to there's a sacrifice you have to sacrifice that but wow man that is That that's this that's Jack Kerouac. That's him in way. Yeah, that's all the great literature came from people throwing themselves out of their orbit putting themselves in potentially deadly Situations a hundred percent I think it to come back and tell the stories. Yeah. Which is perfect for a comedian, by the way. Yeah, yeah. What's it like doing standup out there? How are you, what are the audiences like?

Who are they? It's expat. It's all perverts with a creepy Thai wife that doesn't speak English. Expats are wild, some of them are wild, man. Real interesting people. I did a bit and then I went to Pattaya. You know what Pattaya is?

Yeah, I've heard of it. It's called the Devil's Asshole. Cause everything you've ever wanted. Like if you're a pedophile Nazi rapist, this is home. Cause I'm thinking of everything I ever wanted. Like it's not in the Devil's Asshole. Oh, I see. Yeah.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay. Yeah. But you know what? Don't in Dante's Inferno, don't you have to like climb down? Yeah. Like on the way out of hell, you are under the devil's asshole. You're going to catch a glimpse of his weird puckered evil taint. And I did the gig there. And I'm like, bomb, come and sing.

I'm bombing, because it's old British men, 55 years old, and they're raping this young child, basically. So fucked up. That's who's in the crowd. I don't think people understand, like you're not being hyperbolic here. I don't think people understand. It's like that culture is so real out there.

And like completely, no one's stopping it. No one there seems to care because of the money, I guess the expats are bringing in or something. Like, why don't they stop it? No, because also in Thai culture and in like a culture of like, I mean, imagine you're a Thai girl that your prospects of life are, you either do the path your mom and whatever they're doing, or you find this guy and might have a ticket.

I mean, you might actually raise your kids. Right. So it's some kind of like awful way out. Yeah, I guess it's all a matter of perspective. Awful to who? Awful to us maybe, because we come from the land of fucking, you know, cookies and cream. Of course, for us, it seems awful. But for them, it might

be literally the best choice they have, you know? And some of them don't know that they have more choices. But when I've been in those hotels, like when I've gone to Thailand, there's been some moments where you see some, you know, fat lard of an American. It's always a fat lard with crocs on, who's the guy. You see him by the pool and then you see the beautiful angel that he has, you know. Right. Beautiful. I mean, literally an angel. Yeah. And they have kids, the beautiful kids, you know, the blue eyes, tight, the dark complexion, but the blue eyes is beautiful, you know. And you look, oh, it's actually not that, you know, it's a life.

But then sometimes by the pool, you'll see the mother by herself staring at her own reflection in the water. Oh, Jesus. And you can see it for a second, which is like, fuck. Jesus Christ, I'm gonna fucking kill me. This is a roller coaster, man. You're, I might not survive this podcast!

Ah, so... Fuck! So, as in Pattaya, I'm seeing bombing, because I'm trying to be nice. I'm like, global warming, what is it? You know, I'm trying to... Avocado, when is it ready? You know? Almond, milk, how could it be milk?

They don't have nipples, you know, the usual whatever... Whatever, shit. I'm bombing, and there's a headlineliner, Jonathan Atherton. This is the first time I work with him. He's dead now, rest in peace. He was like a legend to the Southeast community. He got banned in Australia because he fought the way, fought the stewardess high on PCP. Well, he says that he did some painkillers and saw the literal devil on the flight. That's his story. But so he's like a crazy guy. He has a white suit on, white suit. He's side stage.

And this is the first time I met Jonathan. When I meet him, he shakes my hand, he goes, hey, I'm like, hey, I might have a beer before the gig. I'm like, do you want a beer? Jonathan, he goes, I've changed my life. I'm never drinking again. And I'm like, wow, what a guy. When I'm on stage, I see him drinking a bottle of whiskey like this.

And he's looking at me like this. Oh fuck. And the audience is also, oh the avocado. And they look at him then like, is that the hand? How'd he do? He goes on stage, he drops the n-bomb immediately off the top. Just to let him know. Standing go off the top just to let him know standing go off the top he goes what's up you fucking racist rapist you know just goes what's his name Jonathan Arthur the legend will you pull up a picture of Jonathan Atherton please yeah I mean he spoke like eight languages lived in Myanmar did heroin in Cambodia he fucking started the scene in Malaysia. What was his last name? Atherton. Atherton. Yeah, yeah, that's how we go. That's my buddy. I can't believe I'm bringing out a telephone.

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you, this is a happy accident. I have discovered the ultimate source of perfect, simple t-shirts. So try them out. If you don't like them, send them back. You'll like them. Thank you, True Classic. ["Sky", by True Classic playing in the background.] Wow. This guy. Oh yeah, he's a maniac. He's a maniac. I love the guy. That is a maniac. Awesome, dude.

Wow. You could just tell. Love the guy. It's cool seeing... He actually settled down a bit later in his life. He had a very nice fiancé and I went to his house for dinner years, years later. He actually settled down later and I in his life. He had a very nice fiance, and I went to his house for dinner years, years later.

He actually settled down later, and he was awesome. See, there's Tom Rhodes, another international comic. Yeah, I know Tom. So of course he's with that guy. Wow. So this subculture, this sect of comics, this is like the traveling comedians. These are the international comedians who are just like,

who found a tour schedule that routes through ex-pack communities. Yeah. Wow. And he was murdering on stage, Shane. Yeah. Ah, ah, ah, ah. And then at one point when he's murdering,

cause I was bombing and I'm side-staged now with my little beer, all fucking white-faced, he like turns to me and goes, see, that's why the jokes are landing Ari they're a bunch of racist all the guys and he goes they want to hear the real shit how about these sand nahas you know fuck these areats. Wow. At one point he's murdering a lady, a lady with short hair. She's like a nicer lady who probably was on vacation. Well, she shouldn't be on vacation, but she thought, let's go and see some comedy. She stands up and she's crying when she's standing up.

She's like, you can't say these things, you know, because Jonathan's going off about Aboriginals, right? And she's like, we won! You know, fucking.'s going off about Aboriginals. All right. It's easy. It's about, we won! You know, whatever. She stands up, you know, and you're a horrible person. You're a fire. Jonathan goes, fuck you, you fucking cunt. You know, it's just, she storms out.

Uh, this is my first time meeting Jonathan. The gig ends, he keeps drinking. Of course we play some pool. Um, I go out with a couple of the waitresses there. Do some, we go to of course, we play some pool. I go out with a couple of the waitresses there, we go to some bars, we play some pool, and the hotel was above the gig, the Lion's Pub, this is above the gig, right, so there's a hotel. And I go back to the hotel, to my room,

I walk past Jonathan's room, and I'm hearing some sounds that are like insane coming from that room. But the door is cracked a little open. Kick it with my foot a little, just to see what's happening in that room. Jonathan, white suit, the top bar sill on, bottom missing, top bar sill on. And it's all, cause he started drinking red wine. His white suit is all covered in red wine. And he's banging a broad. And I look who the broad is, the lady stormed out.

Jonathan's holding her hair, fucking the shit out of her. And she's like, fuck me. Ultimate victory. Bah, bah, and I just go to bed in my... And then- Wow, inspirational. And then in the morning, I see Jonathan, the a suit on a white suit all clean. She goes hey

How was your night just like totally fine? And he goes yeah, I go and I'm like having a mimosa do for my hangover ago I go you want to be mostly like I don't drink Wow, how did you get booked on that show? I knew a guy Andrew who's I'm never drinking again. Wow, how did you get booked on that show? I knew a guy, Andrew, he was a Malaysian promoter. I got booked on some tours and gigs. That's how you just found gigs there. Cause my visa ran out in Australia,

so I needed to find a place. And at that time, Estonia didn't quite have a scene. When I came back, it just started bubbling. And I was really, within a year, I was able to start doing theaters in Estonia and change my act from English to Estonian, adapted a little bit. But at the time, I was just finding some gigs. I lived in Kuala Lumpur for six months at a hostel, just hosting gigs. What do you get paid for a gig out there?

I got maybe, some gigs were good, $250 a gig, which can last you a month in Asia. That's incredible. Yeah. In Southeast Asia. So that sort of group of like international traveling gonzo miscreant comics, what do they think of the sort miscreant comics. What do they think of the sort of more traditional,

like, American comedian path? Like, do they look down on it, or is there a sense of like, ugh? There's another guy I know, Jim. He's from Florida, black guy. He moved to Macau, China. You know Macau? It's the fake Vegas. I didn't know. I heard the name, but I didn't know it was fake Vegas. It's fake Vegas. They have the fake Luxor, they have the fake Vegas. I heard the name, but I didn't know it was fake Vegas. It's fake Vegas.

They have the fake Luxor, they have the fake MGM Grand, they have everything the fake. Oh, that's so weird. And he does a 600 seater theater there for the past 20 years, maybe. And I did a gig with him maybe six, seven years ago. He's like a Florida black guy. And he's a superhero there.

He walks around, Asian people clap, they take pictures, hang off his arms, arms you know he does his act in English yeah but it's all the tourists and whatever but he also speaks Chinese he also he dips into the you know the the traditional version how to do comedy there is you do the setup in English and then the punchline back now you know you go and then the people lose their mind yeah so crazy so that's what he would do I mean a black guy speaking Chinese. I'm gonna jump off the balcony if I hear that.

Of course it's funny. And I remember like five, six years ago, and I was already, you know, this was my like first trip back since I started there. And I'm talking to him, like happy to see you. We go to the restaurant and I go like, I talk about a little bit of the Rogan experience. I talk about the podcast world.

And he's like, you know, he's like yeah, how's Jeff Dunham doing? You know that's right. So he's not even right and I know and I need those cruise ships and stuff you know and I know I know I know I know I know the American he's not after the grind the bits are hack I know I I know. But isn't it wonderful that this art form, you can find a place in life through this art form anywhere. Jim is somewhere in Macau right now drinking a margarita and crushing it in front of 600 people every night. It's incredible. What's weird about the Macau Vegas, which I didn't even know existed there, I've seen pictures of it, but I didn't know that's where it was.

Is Vegas is a replica of a bunch of different places. Yes. So now you have a replica of a replica. That is so trippy. And then to be some dude from Florida. Famous in synthetic made up Vegas. Yeah. What a mind fuck. What a mind fuck what a mind fuck what's his name I don't want to say his name just because I don't know no problem but can you pull up Macau Vegas I just want to see pictures of it let's take a look at this

Wow man yeah I agree with you though it's such a it's such an incredible thing. Macau, C-A-U, Macau. Go China, if you go Macau, Vegas, it's gonna show. There you go. Oh yeah, here we go. Las Vegas of the East. Oh, it's beautiful. I mean, it looks nicer than Vegas. Look at that.

Holy shit, man. Yeah, this is where this gym guy lives. He does the local casino. He walks down the Venetian, the fake Venetian. Oh my God, that's so weird. So funny. No, that's Vegas. They don't have a fabulous.

This isn't the Wynn Hotel, that's in Macau. No, what? But it's the fake Wynn. But they just do the everyday replica. Look, the Paris thing you fucking... What the fuck? That dude, I would lose my like if I got on drug, I guess you're not going to do drugs in China. It's really dangerous. But if I was tripping in Macau, I think I'd go crazy. I know. Yeah. Because I'd start thinking, no, I am in Vegas, but no, I'm in China. In China. With Ari, how did I end up here? What's happening to me?

Yeah, to me, I just think the whole, like what happens is whatever cultural bubble you live in, it crystallizes into this is reality, this is the truth. Like, and then when you're a traveler like you are, that bubble gets popped because suddenly you realize, no, that's just one tiny little reality tunnel compared to the whole world. And all these other reality tunnels exist simultaneously.

It's basically parallel universes. Like, if you really wanna like, it's a multiverse. The multiverse isn't, I mean, maybe there is a multiverse and you can like jump from one timeline to the next, but if you want the real multiverse, just travel. And you go into, when I went to India, that was what I thought is like,

this is an alternate reality. For sure. This is not the reality I was in. This is an alien, completely different reality. And no one gives a shit about whatever the fuck was going on where I'm from. Yeah, exactly. And the way it works there is totally different.

The way traffic works there shouldn't work. There should be horrible accidents every few minutes there. Well, there is. Oh yeah, I guess you're right. I literally remember having this thought in Thailand. Being high on my... I bought a little motorbike in Thailand, I was riding my little motorbike. This was my first month there when I moved there for a bit.

And I was riding around high and literally I watched the traffic come like... The human experience is an organism. And the traffic lights are a scam to control us. And then within a minute I drive past like... It's like a scooter accident that hit a truck, but it's a Thai scooter, so it's a family of seven. And the baby shoes, the bloody baby shoes are all over the road, a little small little bag for the small little baby that's dead.

And I go, maybe we do need a light. And then I go home and it's the number one traffic, like an accident, everybody dies there in traffic. I love you. Ari Mati, thank you so much for coming on the show, man. and it's the number one traffic, like an accident, everybody dies there in traffic. I love you. Ari Mati, thank you so much for coming to the show, man. I'm a big fan, Duncan, you're so funny. Oh, dude, I am a big fan.

You just blew everyone's mind. And I don't know how we're gonna end it on anything more poignant and terrible and awesome than that. And wow, I know you're doing shows in Austin right now, so I hope folks, if you're out here, come and see him at the mothership. And wow, man, I hope you'll come back on the show. Fuck yeah, I'd love to, yeah.

I had so much fun here. And you're a great guy. You have your podcast with Jamar. Did you do a podcast with Jamar? Yeah. Yeah, amazing. Thank you, he's awesome. He's awesome. You know, Jamar's a guy, when I see him at the mothership, I go,

he's the only comedian who I see there, and I'm like, you have other shit going on other than comedy. Oh my God. He, like- Like, you don't need even this. He's a boxer, did you know that about him? Boxer, artist, he goes to like the private part,

he paints- He's a clown? He's a clown, he's every- Yeah, he's got a lot going on, probably more than we'll ever know. I wouldn't be surprised if he does like, covert shit for like, porn identity stuff.

100%. I would not be shocked. 100%. Awesome, man. Thank you. Thank you so much. Thank you for having me. Thanks for being on.

Thank you. Dude, you are real good at podcasting. Thanks. That was Ari Matty, everybody. Go check him out at AriMatty.com or you can watch him on Kill Tony Or hopefully you can see him do some stand-up because he's so funny And thank you to my sponsors and thank you to you my sweet friends for listening subscribe Let us defeat Mr. Beast

Until next time I bid you you, Hunantayla! That means goodbye and finish. Hunantana. Hunantana.