Duncan Trussell Family Hour - Dr. Drew And Fred Stoller
Episode Date: August 18, 2015Dr. Drew (Loveline, The Dr. Drew Show) and Comedian Fred Stoller (Everybody Loves Raymond, Maybe We'll have You Back) join the DTFH to talk about the deep existential questions that inevitable all hum...ans must face!! Â This episode brought to you by SQUARESPACE.COM Â use offer code DUNCAN to receive 10% off of your first order.
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Hello my sweet, delectable, delicious, sentient toes protruding from the perfumed foot of
an unknown nameless goddess.
It is I, Duncan Trussell and you are listening to the Duncan Trussell Family Hour Podcast.
Do you hear in the background a annoying drone, which you probably do?
That's my air conditioner.
It's a frigid air and I really appreciate the input I got from the last podcast.
A lot of you guys had some ideas for ways that I could cool the room down quietly.
One of them, something called a swamp fan or something like that, a swamp gasser, which
I'm not going to use just because of the name.
I don't even know what it does.
A lot of interesting inventions, strange assemblages of vacuum cleaners and dry ice.
A lot of advice that I should have someone fan us as we do the podcast.
I'd love to do that, but the scheduling to get a professional fanner and the cost of
it, it seems like it would be such a pain in the ass that it would make more sense to
just go to an office or install central air than to recruit someone to fan my guests.
And honestly, I don't know how much fanning is going to cut through the oily, thick heat
that is generated from a 100 year old house in a city going through a four year drought.
This is a preternatural heat.
This is the kind of heat that you might feel being emitted from a obsidian demon horn found
beneath some forbidden Mayan pyramid.
This is the heat that rises from the flesh of a desert madman who just read it.
The necronomicon is now running gibbering through the dunes about some ancient thing
that lies at the edge of time and waits to devour humanity.
This is the kind of heat that comes out of the many moldering dried up coyote carcasses
that lie at the base of Griffith Park.
This is a sick heat.
This is the heat of the madman's diaper.
This is the heat of the spoon used to scoop the awful remnants from said diaper into the
mouth of some evil fly goddess.
This is the heat of the fly goddess's vagina as it explodes great pestulent blasts of egg
larvae into some interdimensional battlefield where the larva explodes into thousands of
tiny spiders that climb into the nose and ears of all those who stand in their way slowly
and painfully dissolving their brain into a liquefied mush which they vomit into the
air and great geysers of green.
It's an evil heat, so I hope you'll forgive me if I've got the AC running, I just don't
know what else to do.
If I don't keep this thing running in the podcast studio then I've got to go and find
a studio to record at that isn't in my house or I have to move, which by the way, if you
want to create, if you live in Los Angeles and you want to create some extreme cognitive
dissonance for yourself, I highly recommend going to Padmapper which is a great apartment
finding application and put in a zip code like North Carolina and then put in whatever
the rent is that you're paying for a house here and look at what kind of homes you can
get in other parts of the country.
And you very well might want to run into your kitchen, open up a drawer, pull out your favorite
pair of chopsticks and drive them into your ear piercing the membrane that separates your
ear canal from your brain and just lobotomize yourself as you realize that for the rent
that you're paying in Los Angeles you could be renting a multi-storied Victorian mansion
in the midst of some beautiful verdant grove populated by pan-like creatures who on nights
of the full moon will bring you wine skin filled with some sacred magical psilocybin-infused
wine which will allow you to temporarily dance with all the sweet goddesses that have ever
wandered through the emerald green of primordial earth, mother fucker it's expensive here in
LA and when you consider the fact that you're paying this massive amount for rent in a place
that is essentially just a dry it's like living inside the fur of a sunblasted dog.
Anywho we're going to dive right into this podcast with us today are two awesome human
beings comedian Fred Stoller and Dr. Drew.
We shall leap right into that but first some quick business.
This episode is brought to you by the pixel lords over at Squarespace.com.
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to make sure it's right for you go to squarespace.com today and use offer code Duncan and you will
get 10% off your first purchase we're also brought to you by Amazon.com if you go to
DuncanTrussell.com and any of the comment sections there you will find a portal and
if you click through that anything that you buy on Amazon they will give us a very small
percentage of it so for all of you who continue to use that portal I thank you it's an excellent
way for you to support this podcast while buying all that beautiful plastic stuff that
makes your life so very happy and I know this is a hacky premise and has been said a million
times but don't go on Amazon stone late at night or you will end up with things like
what I'm staring at right now which is a blackhead remover and this is a direct result of being
super high watching videos of people removing blackheads from the nose this terrible grizzled
nose of an Indian gentleman that has mysteriously become populated with a field of the most
foul blackheads that you've ever seen in your life and it's just a 30 minute video of this
doctor removing them as he comments on it now it's super high and went on Amazon and ordered
one of these blackhead removers I guess thinking that I would remove blackheads from my own face
and I don't really have any but this thing arrived and it's just a mark of exactly why you shouldn't
get high and go on Amazon because you'll end up like that weird doctor in Dune trying to remove
boils from your face they also have bidets drones toilet paper anything you might need just go
through the portal first at Duncan trustle.com I've got some upcoming tour dates I'm going to
be in Australia in November and I'm going to be the laughing skull in Atlanta starting on October
15th all of those tickets are available at Duncan trustle.com we also have a beautiful shop
located at Duncan trustle.com with a lot of great t-shirts posters and we just added festival
banners so you could display your alliance with the overmind that is the Duncan trustle
family hour podcast at the next music festival you go to go check them out all right let's get on
with the show with us here today are two wonderful humans one of them is a returning guest who you
know from everything Dr. Drew and we have a first time guest on the show who has been
a guest star on so many tv shows that he wrote a book about it called maybe we'll have you back
the life of a personal tv guest star everybody please welcome to the Duncan trustle family
hour podcast Fred Stoller and Dr. Drew
it's the Duncan trustle family hour podcast is an unexpected pleasure thanks you for putting
this together you guys oh thank you usually I like to go on these to like you know I don't know but
this I'm really you're gonna help me learn things you're so smart and Dr. Drew was saying Duncan
well this is what happened this is what happened Fred was on my podcast and somewhere in the middle
podcast he started waxing poetic about edibles and how they changed things for him and all his
late discovery late discovery in life all these misconceptions he had about pot and its clinical
utility and then he started talking about alternative realities and I went okay we got to go talk to
Duncan because I don't think it's an alternative I think it is right now wait sum it up sum up the
idea here what's the tell your story tell your story and then the idea well long story short that
we talked before I didn't really do pot because in the 80s I got a bad sore throat and the stigma
was Cheech and Chong hey dude hey seven years what there was actually a commercial where
pot does nothing really does nothing because you they see them hey I thought it was seven years ago
so I thought it was just idiots so but then um I did uh I forgot whose podcast and speed weed was
promoting it and they give you free samples at the end hey the Gino gives you the stuff
and I and I speed pot or whatever they call it yeah it's a little sample bag he gives you a sample bag
a little wonderful white bag yes gummy bears oh joints and I was thinking I don't do my and someone
said oh no it opens up your mind and and so I am a late convert to it and what I was telling Drew
is that well first of all when I get stoned like I lie in my bed and go why would someone need to go
to Hawaii this you close your eyes and and when it feels right and then on edibles he was in
Hawaii in his own mind yeah when it's working you're everywhere I'm George Clooney I'm the guy who
got paralyzed shot by the cops every good thing bad thing everything this no one has a nicer house
that's my house it's all anything you've thought of all that generic and I was telling Drew that
starting to tell you I was trying to thank Joe Rogan for taking the stigma away and there's a
big thing at the comedy store and all these stragglers were hanging out there I never thought
I'd be the guy trying to take free joints that were in the middle like oh he's a free and I put them
in my pockets I became that guy and and and Joe's going whatever he didn't know who I was he thought
it was well I'm not saying anyone's better or worse but one of these guys who just hangs out and puts
the joints in which I was and and and Morgan Murphy was saying all this hippy stuff this like hacky
like you're one with everything okay so basically I try not to do pot or whatever when I have to
memorize stuff and I have to do real world stuff but then I thought when this booze I was saying
you're drunk but you're drunk in the real world and and and so when it's really working when the
door shut I'm thinking why is that reality not the real world why is this world I and people can't
see but I'm pitching me my finger like a little piece of sand that's the world we know where this
traffic lights where less moon is is a gatekeeper where you know Barack Obama is the president
where you know and I'm saying which one's less moon he like runs CBS and everything yeah that's
funny before we get into that see that's and what you're talking about the old world man those guys
are gatekeepers to it's really funny because there were all these gatekeepers right to this castle
right suddenly technology creates a billion more gates which is why it's really funny because the
gates that everybody used to go into are still clotted with people trying to go through those
gates it's hilarious it's like if you ever noticed at the grocery store a new line will open yeah
and there'll be this huge line and no one will move to the new because they're sheep and they feel
like oh I just got to stay in the line that everybody else is right another example is traffic
GPS is creating all this like if people use like ways ways or certain GPS programs their apps they
end up all following the GPS exactly and so they end up with like in these huge clusters traffic
so if you just dodge around the traffic and ignore the voice of the GPS for a few minutes you will
zoom around all these poor people who are just being controlled by the machine a great metaphor
for a lot of things when you say the old world I think maybe what I'm gathering is what I used
to think is the real world like for example when I'm judging myself I'm a guy that's closer to 60
than 50 in a bunch of years hasn't had pilot auditions in years it was always lived alone
or what I'm trying to say is when I judge myself well I'm trying to say these these are things
but that is just a sliver sliver sliver when when when the edibles working right what I used to think
was who I was was a guy that's you know but but but wait don't finish the sentence who were you
I used to think I was these things in the real world a guy that's whatever never been married
a woman nervous about that always been alone you know closer to 60 than 50 not my imbd whatever
the you know the credits all those things that are made up that's wise at the real world they
used to think that's the real world those judgments so let's talk about that let's talk about those
judgments cognitions let's talk about those cognitions they don't they don't read they're
not real when I'm when the edibles working right do you know about CBT yes I'm listening to this
audiobook on CBT and it's exploding my brain how much do you know about CBT I know about the
application I've never I don't I'm not trained to do it it's it's it's very useful yeah CBT
cognitive behavior therapy oh I come up with that on my own I think but go ahead what have you
learned so the idea is there's a triangle and cognitive behavior therapy and at the very top
of the triangle you have your thoughts and the bottom two points of the triangle you have behaviors
and emotions and the concept is very simple it's thoughts influence behaviors and emotions every
point the triangle influences the other points right if you change it's a it's a wholism it's a
holistic right yeah change your behaviors your thoughts are going to change yeah change your
I thought the thoughts change the behaviors everything changes everything else so the idea is
you use a kind of empiricism to explore the cognitions you're having to determine whether
or not these cognitions are right because a lot of people they have transylvania in their heads
populated by superstitious gypsies that parade around as the form of all these ridiculous thoughts
that you tell yourself exactly and what you just listed is cognitions you just listed a
series of self-defining thought patterns which the invitation from CBT is why don't we begin to
explore these thoughts scientifically so the question is you know these judgments that are not
reality right well I was gonna I was telling you guys before that I realized almost every
in this chronicle real world I'm more rational in that other world of the altered state but
almost every thought I have is irrational in the real world like this asshole in front of me oh
he's got I'll get upset that someone had a shoe horse tattoo on their neck this asshole you know
to me and and I get livid and things get upset yeah and and and well yeah that's real so let me
backtrack um you know when people give unsolicited advice see my shrink when someone seems calm you
go why why you how do I not hate myself I once said to my friend I know they say don't hate yourself
easier said than done and he told me you hate yourself I've gotten better I'll tell you what
happened I used to beat myself up and and he told me about affirmations how I've just been grown up
with you know my mother saying if I lost something you know you'd lose your head if it wasn't attached
to you and I go I'm a piece of shit if I came from my glasses you fucking asshole I hate my you
know I used to play tennis with Norma down throw the rack it's like if I miss you asshole so then
he told me about norm told you no no no he doesn't know affirmations but that you have the little I
used to say I love myself I accept myself I'd have to have those guys fight out the years of piece
of shit you know those guys so then what happened was that when I did the affirmations and meditation
then I'd hear you piece of shit like there were so many of those guys in my head saying you're a
piece of shit loser Fred I couldn't discern them I did they were almost like you know those things
and then when I started getting helping myself with cognition and and affirmations it was a
step to hear discern those things you piece of shit because then I could at least like and and
try to shout it out here's my question for you so what you're doing in CBT and God forgive me
I read is it CBT sort of what I'm doing but go ahead so CBT there's a concept called diffusion is
what they call it and the idea is it's a process where you do you you the fusion between you and
your thoughts is dissolved through a very variety of processes all of them seem like mindfulness
and Buddhism so it's sort of like these these concepts all overlap tremendously all amazing
yeah right it's crazy the way that they just completely but now when I do that I say it's
fun it's like they're like we're rediscovering it it's just 2000 years ago but it's 2000 years ago
and it would but it was it the way that they described it back then is maybe using language
it's outdated that's right it's hard to hard to understand like I say what I do now is if my
farmer's market it's crab you fucking I go Fred you're being irrational you'll be so I tell myself
I'm being irrational and it helps I recognize I'm being irrational trying to get out here
though sure so there's when you say I tell myself it's a really interesting thing to say isn't it
because you've bifurcated yourself there's the you that's being told and the you that's doing the
telling yes so in Buddhism and a lot of other philosophies and in CBT they invite you to begin
to explore what are you really if you're aware in other words like I'm sitting here I can see you
guys you're sitting in front of me I see this desk yes the microphone and I'm aware of it but
I don't think to myself generally I am this microphone thoughts I'm aware of them they're
some kind of ephemeral structure in my mind that I'm aware of and yet the difference between thoughts
and the microphone is when I have thoughts I think that's me I'm thinking this yet it seems
that just because because I'm aware of it they're very you're not your thoughts I'm not my thoughts
so then the question is well what are you and that's where you get into some really interesting
terrain and that's where the stuff really starts merging into Buddhism because the question is
what who is one of the thoughts that hit me on an edible is don't define me by my past and I do that
and people do that and you know but when I'm talking about the real world Jim Jeffries had a great
bit well with the gun control when he said maybe I'm not even in front of a crowd maybe I'm in a
sane asylum just talking to the wall and I'm imagining I'm in front of 1200 people and a lot
of like like right now maybe I'm like okay I'll give you an example I don't read Amazon reviews
you know I learned that they did the audible of my Kindle single my Seinfeld here I finally did
and I you know I looked at this who wants to hear this nasally loser guy talk don't spend the $1.99
so then I got upset that I thought maybe I just I probably just imagined I read that because
that negative conception of reading a bad amazon review was not that this guy did it but that was
my interpretation it's almost like I imagine that does that make any sense absolutely there's a there's
a term in yoga called the Vreeti's and I'm primus pronouncing it VR TTIS it's a term related to
thought forms and it kind of roughly translates into cyclones in your head so so when something bad
happens is I imagined that bad what what I think is bad okay so let's just think about and maybe
maybe uh Dr. Drew can help us with the neurology behind it because I really don't understand what
exactly happens but when you're taking in reality right what's happening is that you are creating
a neurological corollary for reality yes yes your brain is is creating a representation
of the experience through your sensory mechanisms it's like a chemical reflection
of stuff it's a way to think about it it's so much more bizarre and holistic than that
it's almost defies description it's crazy to think about right but what's happening is there's
all this phenomena happening out here I think I think discussing phenomena per se as a way to
conceptualize so phenomenology is a great way to approach this okay so so this stuff is flowing
there's things out there and it impinges on our sensory organs and it's converted into signals
and those signals are converted into something in our head yes but like if I have a good experience
it's almost like I created that if I have something quote unquote bad it's almost let's say a guy came
up to my car and threw coffee in it it's almost like I not that I created that because I manifested
it but because my interpretation it's like can I give you an example please please okay I like to
use this cake example so I give you a slice of cake it's not good cake not bad cake just a normal
slice of cake right right I bring it in I give you the slice of cake and I say to you Fred
guess what man I just found out that there's five million dollars you weren't aware of and a trust
that you're gonna get when you eat that cake how delicious is that cake gonna be that's called
priming that's priming your brain that's a great piece of cake right that's maybe the best piece
of cake you've ever had in your life you're gonna remember by the way you could have handed him
dog shit it would have been the best piece of dog shit you've ever had either right the cake
that I hand to you and then I tell you about your cancer diagnosis and that you have one
month to live yes not a good cake that cake ain't gonna taste very good yes that's gonna be a good
cake so so so in that way it's like what what you you begin to realize is that you have all this
stuff coming into your experience but really what's happening is your your apprehension
of what's happening is transforming whatever it is so another way to put it a much more concise
way to put it is an asshole gets on the plane in Los Angeles an asshole gets out of the plane in
New York it doesn't matter where you're at it's the interior universe that's affecting everything
around you another way to put it is uh a Buddhist quote which is some people will say to you this
city is better than that city or these people are better than that people then there's no
differentiations I say to you the whole world is on fire and the idea is that what's up the fire is
the fire right your interpretation let me though let me though cloud this picture a little bit please
and because there's a lot to be discussed in what you've just pointed out and we need to get back
to that because that's what fred wants to alter right and then he's questioning what's real when
that altered state when I'm in that altered state I'm going why is that not real okay but hold on
I'm going to throw out another phenomena that affects all this and that is the shared phenomena
that humans have the interpersonal intersubjective phenomena consensus reality well yes that that
is a cognitive flare to it but I'm of the opinion I can't believe I've not brought I must have brought
this up to you before but that I'm of the opinion that that consciousness is a shared experience
I don't I don't yes I don't think consciousness happens when I'm when it's working I'm in tune
to every experience but hold on here no I understand but but to some extent higher planes of consciousness
that we sustain are things we have to kind of either let go of how we allow other people to
impinge on our conscious phenomenology or allow people to help us get to another plane it's other
it's shared in some extent consciousness is disembodied like it it functions outside of the human
organism no I don't but I don't believe it exists in a single scope I think it's something we co-create
together okay and I'm suspicious that consciousness as we experience it probably a little different
quality 10 000 years ago so it's changing and and I do believe that if you raised in the woods as
a feral child you would not have consciousness you'd have feelings and you'd have personal
experiences but you wouldn't have something I would call conscious awareness interesting so you
think consciousness is kind of like a circuit that gets activated I think it's shared yes and
particularly two people two skulls so your theory is an individual alone if you never having had
social but what about the concept that we're all connected very limited indifferent yes very well
limited do you think yeah limited or just well who knows maybe it's more expanded you know this would
go into solitary confinement and yeah but that's why it's so horrible that's why it's so it's torture
cutting your sir it's it's like so cut it's like amputating true are you trying to say
that when when I'm in these zones yeah that when I think those bad racial shootings in the south
in the movie the church that's something Fred Stoller imagined no no that's because I feel that
sometimes so maybe I'm not being yes no no I'm not being selfish I just mean it's sort of like
when you call like that guy you said that in the cave that has no consciousness but I'm part of him
when I feel this is connected I'm part of this brilliant people here I'm part of the truck driver
there's no but you're but I think you're right see this is why I want to bring this up I think
when he's solipsistic Fred he's limiting some of that a little bit right and I think maybe the
cannabis is giving him access some way what I find is when I have a breakthrough same with
meditation and I don't want him to get lost in a solipsistic sense of what's real so you know
saying but the cannabis is amplifying some kind of magical thinking some some he's freeing him a
little sorry to talk about no no no I'm I'm trying to figure this all out glass window so taking
notes well let me let me ask you something in one way we're not wired to bear the the trauma of the
world like tribes don't know what's happening the tribe next to them so I'm too over-sensitive I
when that shooting happened I can't watch the news I can't put on links you want to do something
I'll give you a really cool exercise to do that this guy this actually I learned when I was a kid
I stumbled upon this book my mom had called Roger Yoga by Yogi Ramachiraka I have no name
about your parents what your mom do well my mom was a psychologist and your dad my dad was like a
real estate agent so yeah well yeah where would you go well all over the place where you start we
started in not real estate agent but he worked in real estate shopping center so we started in
developer yes developer that's the word we start rampager yes we started in Georgia and ended up a
lot of other places so I always just say North Carolina is home okay but this book Roger Yoga
Yogi Ramachiraka first time I came in contact with like Eastern thinking that I remember and I
remember I was as a kid reading this and just being like holy shit as it turned out Yogi Ramachiraka
it's just some English guy his name was like James Thompson I found out later each he made it all up
it was like a big his identity as some Yogi was a fraud but at the time I was pictured in robes
and the Amalia's anyway there's an exercise in there which is you begin as a net you can begin
to practice instead of referring yourself as me or I you start referring to yourself as he
so when you're describing yourself to yourself you don't think I am scared you think he is scared
he is neurotic he is worried he is freaking out he is this he is that because you're it's an exercise
that's trying to push you back into the place called the witness or the ottman or the observer
so that you begin to realize that in the same way that all this other shit this phenomena
out here is like dust in the lens of the eye of the universe so are all your cognitions
so are is is literally everything and so then you begin this practice of not just diffusing from your
thoughts but diffusing from the very limited identity of yourself that you've decided is you
because it really isn't you right you're right you're right sometimes when I'm tripping on this
stuff well I see myself from an out-of-body experience and let me ask you is this selfish
thinking or uh selfistic I'm sitting here and maybe I'm a little hungover which I like to
hungover I tried to do in edibles last night so I did well so I'd have stuff to talk about but I
I slept through it and right now I'm sitting here and I'm thinking I could be hallucinating
Duncan Trussell and Dr. Drew Dr. Drew could be almost like in a movie like a fictional guy like
we're making up the guru celebrity that's how you're feeling that's how you're feeling now
no I'm saying it could be no and why not let's say let's say okay well not just you let's say
what sometimes they think what if this is a movie like someone wrote there's a black guy
Barack Obama is the president um but I would argue there's a guy made up Dr. Drew you know what I'm
saying do you ever get that kind of thinking like what we I'll give you or something a million times
tripier if you want man and Fred Stolt is a neurotic killer like we're all we're all just a
movie and someone else's you know we're fiction does that make any sense okay Robert Anton Wilson
this is a good one he says that actually we're not on earth we're in the star I think he says
that we are in the uh what's the name of the dog star that that star system it's called Alpha Centauri
uh I can't remember the star system he says we're in but he says that we're actually in a different
star system yes the pyramids are placed there as clues no no that are somehow lining up with
this star system that actually we are in a kind of simulation where we are being trained uh and
this is the what this is what school looks like for an alien species is that it places you it's
here so yes go into your that what you're talking about because I it's a you get what I'm saying
of us have come to you through psychedelics so here's the idea you Fred have been placed
in this simulator right super advanced civilization we've placed you here because you're god you're
essentially a very very super powerful god you're a god you're everything and so what we're doing here
is we're giving you a lesson in limitation this is how you're teaching yourself is by allowing
yourself to experience you're getting this to experience limitation and so every single thing
that you're seeing me dr drew and come on it's in my imagination lots of winks we gave you a lot
of winks didn't we a lot of winks like that time the guy was sending uh uh dick pics his name was
weiner come on come on really you believe that right right you know what I mean but this is all
stuff we created so it's selfish but well it's not that we but then there's other winks too that you
get every time just probability generally is a wink yeah any kind of synchronicity is a wink
from the I love synchronicity that's my favorite thing that's the it's the relief you get when you're
in a simulation and the people who are projecting the simulation into your consciousness sends you
signs like hey calm down for a second man this is not what you think it is it's that great bill
hicks joke it's just a ride you're in a ride you're being given this beautiful experience of human
life this beautiful experience of limitation and because you've gotten so absorbed into the character
you've been playing wow red you're experiencing all this anxiety in the same way when you were a kid
and you watched a horror movie you would freak out I remember watching horror movies as a kid
fear paralysis I would literally go into a fear paralysis because I was so identified with the
character in the movie that I was freaking the fuck out so this same thing has happened to most
human beings on this planet we're in a kind of existential fear paralysis so so so drew is taking
the character of the celebrity guru health guy spokesperson yeah yeah so everyone's the same
but they just put different things you're the guy in Africa you're the guy you know the uh rug we
play the the vet yeah yeah so people like for example what I'm trying to say also is like
what if someone wrote a movie like I said where there's a you know those movies is a black president
but it's Dorian Hayward there's a a doctor drew type in a movie what why is this not the same thing
as someone else's movie you know what I mean I mean that's where we get into this is so this is
where you get into the really interesting concept which is it is it you have your any I'm imagining
this you're literally imagining it in the sense that what you're witnessing right now is not the
external universe you're witnessing the neurological corollary that's a perfectly harmonized synthesis
of uh wow brain chemistry and that's why I say why is this not the real world this is so legit
this is more rational and than anything in the world okay I define the world as a place where
Fred is judged by his acting parts he's not acting he's always alone you know whatever the guy that
walks around the grove aimlessly that's not me but I've developed but I've made myself think that's
the guy well because it's fun I mean when you really get into it like anytime like I've experienced
like some some of the most intense drama which the highest level of catastrophe quite often
if you give yourself a couple of seconds to witness what's going on you will notice that you're
enjoying it and then you begin to that's that's alcoholic stuff I'm sure not alcoholics don't
enjoy it what what's that not alcoholics don't enjoy it typically well I've noticed alcoholics tend
to enjoy you mean the uh trauma and the much more of a death impulse than they have the average
person yeah it's the well it's the um yeah it's so it's the they get high from the import and
endorphins and stuff that are flying around I don't know if it's I think that alcoholism
result is a word is one thing that results from but I don't think it's just alcohol no no that's
a result from it it's just it's just a future of many non-alcoholic people that like that get off on
drama I don't mean using alcoholics necessarily I'm amazing people get high from the cortisol and
endorphins that fly around people like me find that like if I take a painkiller I feel horrible
I feel terrible I I hate them and I have the same experience from
in drama experiences too like a versiveness like whoa I think you guys are lucky because what if
but no I think I I think you guys are anybody is lucky that likes opiates because what if you
ever need them for cancer or something you know you're gonna be feel good I know I'm gonna feel
like shit oh yeah my mom was like that she didn't like opiates and I remember like what she would
be like I can't I can't take me confused like what are you talking about right and I'm that way
with pot too and you said which is because the endorphin system in my brain or something is somehow
not good it's just not good you're just balanced I mean you know what I think it's evolutionary
thing I've noticed if there's a curious thing in our culture where people have to feel mildly
apologetic for being balanced you know what I mean yes you know it's funny when I'm sorry yes I'm
boring when I first healthy when I friend I don't do this anymore when I first would walk around
like stoned or you know an inedible I'd go I don't deserve this I remember sitting there
drinking lemonade you just think about that yeah that's an I go I felt so good I don't deserve this
I drink lemonade you don't deserve to feel good for that that's a terrible but that would be my
thought terrible thought so good do I deserve this but you know this is the so basically what
you're the thing you're just you said the same thing about this girl that you're about to date
I don't know if I deserve that either no no no that may not work out anyway we'll see well I mean
you so you're what you're doing is you have there's you you've put I but no I'm saying the thoughts
go there but now I could discern them go that's a bad thought get out of here I could at least
pop them shoot them I couldn't see all the monsters the bad thoughts they were so clunky
it was there were so many I couldn't discern all the negatives I hate myself you were just trapped
in of yeah yes in in my head I have a fucking fucking you're a loser Fred you're a loser I didn't
even know they were there now because I've done the affirmations I can hear I don't deserve this I'm
a piece of shit I go and shoot them I could see them and now shoot them away there's a lot of ways
that you know what you're talking about is a great technique there's a lot of other techniques
people say bow to them they say bow to it they say treat it like a guest coming over for tea
they say look at it as weather patterns that's another common description is so so
they're you know they're clouds they're they're you know it's another thing when I'm when I'm
tripping from an edible I'll be feeling good you know and then there'll be a a flash image of like
walking around the Beverly Center the press I'm lonely these things from years ago I don't do
anymore and sometimes I'll go hey you could come in too I'll take care of all of you there you go
pardon me come here you lonely Fred walking around so you're all this the enlightened master
yeah and I'm like hugging them you and I'm feeling good then is that thing Fred walking around on
his birthday alone and the promenade and and and I go you come here don't be afraid like how do we
get how do we get for you mentioned the story the analogy or the image to me of the of hallucinogens
or substances taking you up in the elevator opening the door showing you and then the doors go and
then go back down how do we get Fred into that mode when he's not high or should just be high
oh no no no I think drew um a lot of things uh that have first of all you are fucking brilliant
and I could never read books but when I would meditation I've learned is whenever breakthrough
and and with the edibles I I have something I learned you I can't articulate what just clicked
I can't articulate some conceptual thing but I get it I get it in images so I feel I'm getting
stuff so some of these translate to the non-stone world to like some of the breakthroughs I made
they're there what when meditation when you have a breakthrough you can't go back you know I'm saying
yes that's right well I mean I don't again it's like the ego is so tricky that the the whole time
it's gonna the ego is very tricky when you're getting stoned what's getting stoned that's the
same question you know it goes back the same thing like I when we say I am stoned yeah what do you
mean like what's really stoned and really if you look at it well you've just created a shift
in your consciousness that has taken you out of your day-to-day reality that you were used to
and has given you this wonderful little other reality going up into the park and finding a
nice view and looking down on the city of the self and seeing it and be like okay there I am
there's this thing that I call myself so but in the same way it's like well that thing is now
stoned you know it's like the there's a that's what I'm saying it's just as legit a reality and I'm
trying to incorporate when I'm not stoned you know what I mean there's a in the verse in the
Bhagavad Gita chapter 2 there's a great verse where God is describing the soul and it's all these
great descriptions but it's like it was never born it will never die it never came into being it will
not cease to be it cannot be burnt by fire withered by the wind wet by water it is undying
everlasting unchanging inconceivable and transcendent and so all these descriptions
are human attempts to articulate this great observer of two things and that thing doesn't
get touched by this reality this reality plays out in front of it in this but this is almost a
made-up reality like I said judging myself by show biz by women by money in the bank by how long
I've been mad and it's all made up it's not real you yes it is real in the sense that in this moment
if you're playing this game that you made the rules to yes there's a list on this side where here's
where is this success there's on list on this side where he's where he's a failure but it's really
curious if you like if we look at the human population on earth and look at the number of
people who are in the most dire levels of poverty and the number of people who don't have enough to
eat and the number of people who don't have access to the internet and the number of people who don't
have medical care sure and you go to any of them and you say hey check it out there's this life that
oh at me they they it's michael jordan yes i know that i know that so we so you do see it so
yes no no i'm not i'm not impressed the negatives people so what i mean is like so many other people
yeah i'm not saying they would want to like be you but your life situation no and again people
misinterpret me as negative and hating myself i'm fighting it but you you've you've you go to
somewhere you go to the you know the outback somewhere you say what would you say what makes
life meaningful are you happy well yeah you go to somebody and what would they say water and eating
that's a great question a lot of people out there are going to be super happy but with nothing with
most of them are going to talk about the people they love right and who love them thank you doctor
drew you're right because i was about to go on this materialistic thing like yeah you're totally
right he's right that's it it's like you're right that's it but the the um the the but but i think
fred's limiting the the way he loves and is being loved it sounds it sounds like a platitude but
doctor but but because he's he's not open but then the pot opens him all right yes it opens you up
to see that you're not loving yourself and that this is the world and these judgments are inaccurate
my my it's interesting to hear fred talk because for me i like going deeper into reality i like being
more present more in more competitive but that keeps like why is that not present that state
why is that not real i'm not i'm not judging on it i'm just saying my instinct is to go
more into you see what i'm saying duncan why is why is he saying that's more real why i didn't
say okay more more into the thing you might all of the wise call real well i mean it's a i you know
i i had this conversation where uh you know if you have an epiphany while you're high people will
degrade that epiphany because exactly so and i don't think you're doing that necessarily but people
do do that uh i think that that we getting caught up in is this experience real versus some other
experience that isn't real every experience is real is real okay okay okay i think we all agree on
that yeah that's safe to say i think that's a way to sort of approach your question sure it's all
real yes it cannot be an experience that isn't real right because anything that is is exactly
there's no way around something cannot both be and not be that's it yeah that's it and it's
very strange to think about that too because that means that if you exist you've always existed
have you ever thought about this yeah i do and i and i and i start immediately going to the concept
not just of time but temporality what is temporality right you know where is does it is it is the
temporality of this moment simply a holistic forever or is it something biologically linear
that just all that all the time is in the sense that we think about it as humans is just a marking
of change that's based in our biology that's it otherwise it's just temporality it's just this
one moment yeah it does all just one moment i don't know what the fuck right it's all yeah it's a
moment or it's not or it's infinity and a moment or whatever so maybe we do always and have always
will always or maybe one moment well let's go to the temporality okay okay so let's imagine timeline
it's just a timeline timeline is time is different than temporality okay timeline is superimposed
within temporality let's say that your life or is a timeline is existing in time and it starts
biological time biological time yeah i love that you use that term it's so cool man it starts when
you're born ends when you die yeah okay but even if that's the case yeah because you've existed once
that means that before you existed since the beginning of anything your potential to exist
was always there correct yeah your potential is infinite and when you die the potential for you
to be because you have the same is the same which means that really we're just the shadow of our
potential reflecting into time and there's really no way to not exist once you exist because you've
always been when you said time i thought of this image as analogy um do you know what what's that
what's that thing uh with mp3's what's that uh apple thing where oh i'm at that age maybe it's
the pod where i can't think of words anymore i've got that that's software that's linear time not
movie magic for talking into it uh garage band yeah and you know you when you do garage band
you know sometimes you're talking and it's the dots of the conversation but sometimes you
can squeeze it together oh yeah so that's what i feel like sometimes life is like why not just
condense what time isn't this like a line it's like maybe all together you know i'm saying well if
you guys ever had a near-death experience i know i am as drowned twice and doesn't time go in that
moment yeah this this sound this is a it sounds like a bit but it's true that the when we went to
this cheap hotel in florida was no lifeguard hell were you i was i think seven or eight and the
undertow i didn't know what it was but the harder you try the more it brings you out so and that
thing about going down three times drowning that's true what is that i don't know you kind of can
make it about one you can make it up like three times that's about it and and and i was drowning i
was gonna die i was the undertow the more all the sudden i was all the way out there and and went
down three times and then my father ran into the ocean and pulled me out and this sounds like a
comedy but it's true my mother was freddy was so glad you're alive we'll take you to the toy store
you could get anything you want you know so then i saw the stuffed animal it's monkey was like 35
bucks she goes anything but that meaning we're glad you're alive not that glad you know but i
once did a joke this is too this was too subtle like because i almost drowned another time they say
when you're drowning you see important parts your life flesh before you the only parts i saw what
all the other times i was drowning but uh it's uh too subtle for stand-up but yeah oh it's
stop working yeah clubs now please but but i i was uh lost in the mountains out here i was 14
and and with a big pack on my back and we tried to climb our way out and when i was like hundreds
of feet in the air i was in a chimney of that started collapsing on me and i was sliding down
and i literally had a moment where i went i have one chance to heave myself up this thing onto the
platform or or i'm going down i'm going off and in that moment and i get a little ptsc just
thinking about it in that moment time just goes like you can tell you it's it's not that your
whole life passes before you it's that your whole life becomes a dot it's the craziest but isn't that
what it is anyway it's the well yes but it feels like a dot you can see the whole thing like right
there it just all is in front of you that yeah it was a weird experience you see your life and the
astronaut sees the earth yes it becomes a dot it just becomes but it becomes a temporal dot
it's like it all compresses it and in all all moments are equal and they're all right in front
of you when i'm stoned but now all that yeah yeah yeah that's what it is when i'm stoned and what
should be let me ask you another i gotta get some edible stuff this is this is a stupid question
but this is a stupid question but when i'm when i'm doing when it's working
yeah sometimes you like i said you can't finish your thought it's almost like schizophrenia
and we're it's almost with recreating mental illness what we think is a deficiency either pot
or i mean or edibles or mushrooms you know what when you need to know if you can have that happen
history of uh psychedelics right one there's a few great moments in history but it's like
schizophrenia they think when when tim leary goes down to mexico eats mushrooms and apparently
like as a psychologist psychiatrist someone studying the mind has this revelation where he
thinks i now understand schizophrenia because i have temporarily become schizophrenic the way
the way we can use this for treatment because now i've been into that space where maybe a lot of
other people but we strive for that so we're saying mental illness is a fun thing and i don't
mean to be a silly joke so the first reaction was this is mental illness but then you read huxley
talking about mescaline and he says this isn't mental illness this is the state of an artist
yes the genius this is the state of uh being caught up in the you know he described this guy
shouldn't be a comedian he's too smart to be a comedian but i'm saying i'm saying you're you're
eons above what i think a comedian is i'm sorry there's no first of all the whole
label thing yeah i know i'm doing it but but anyway the whole point is it's not i don't
think it's mental illness you're experiencing and this is what huxley says he says what you're
experiencing is the filtration system of the human mind is suddenly stopped so you're taking it all
more holistically although all the human mind is interestingly enough spending a great deal of energy
tuning shit out way more energy tuning stuff out than taking stuff in because like right now like
listen there's a cricket in here there's humming buzzing listen just listen
there's all that you feel your ass in the chair i can feel my shoe there's a splinter in my hand
i can feel my breath crickets driving me crazy now crickets driving you crazy now right
but so all all that stuff the lights i must be schizophrenic you're not just you just you
widened out a little bit of what your experience so so your mind is always filtering the shit out
so when you get when you take a psychedelic who's controlling it who's controlling the filter
well that's a great question who do you think is controlling the filter
that that is also the question of you know free will and everything else is wrapped right into
that it's you know what moment does something start and who's who is there to start it yeah
the moving mover right right that is the question or yes exactly where are you in where
where are you in your body who's making these choices why are you filtering this stuff out
you know is it good to filter stuff out absolutely sometimes you need to filter stuff out i think
autism when i see someone who has it was autistic i think this is like me if i have gotten eaten way
too much weed there every every but it's almost a positive use we're saying autism and mental illness
because the enlightenments well it's it's it's it's it can be really brutal if you're resisting it
and it can be really brutal if you you need to be able to enter into consensus reality and or what
they call the marketplace and spiritual ramdas calls it the marketplace this is them you need
to be able to go into the marketplace wow do your work haggle if you need to haggle be tough if you
need to be tough be nice if you need to be nice but that doesn't just have to be how you live that's
not the totality of reality with a capital R or who or who you are right and the other thing i mean
to say to you and sure that you're very hard on yourself and i'm much better than i used to be
you could say that you're you have been and i've been terrible all those cliches relationship with
your so the worst worst enemy even the guy who sued me for seven months uh made my life miserable
things like that i i've done worse to myself so but i'm better but i'm good i'm i'm i'm showing
i'm able to talk like i'm being repetitious discern these things and go not good but they
still pop up there go you piece of shit go get out or or go oh or i must it's almost like i look at
it like a crying baby like the little thing i'm a loser i'm a piece of shit all my little boy is
upset it's okay i learned to tell myself it'll be okay i never heard the words it's okay from pearl
i heard you'll come i'm in a box we're gonna die you know they mean the you know the people will come
and kill you you'll get raped in coney island so i never heard the words it's gonna be okay so i'd
learn to do that so when i'm doing when i'm going to the inner child i i i say you know it's yeah i
actually the inner child thing long before i came up with that you know and on my own sort of
because i i work with this comedian when cable remember cable was not cable but public accents
access so there was this comedian his son dad you could be on that cable show and then i realized
if i have a son so then i had imaginary son for many years that i can't come home i'm a loser i'm
a piece of shit you have to be strong for your son go yeah you know that i think of the young
comedian special oh but we're gonna be in red i just have one line on amen oh dad's gonna be on
a show i'm so proud of my dad he's a one line on that thing so i started having an imaginary son
and who's excited for me because my mother never had the concept of being strong for your children
she falls apart so as as much as i say i'm sounds like i'm beating myself up i learned
like i said when the guy you're a loser fred you're always alone oh rather than
even shoot the better i thought go come here baby it'll be okay you know i mean he's a little boy in
me that's crying right and i and i and i never learned to who never's done so you're okay now
let's jump take that sure idea that concept now move into that here's the really intense
concept sure so the concept is the universe is composed of ultimate hippie stuff here for
you that's why i'm saying when i was with Morgan Murphy when when when you get first discover pot
i sound like dude we're all one and i sound so hacky but it's true like they say a cliche is
a cliche because it's true the universe is love right everything's love everything is so there's
already been a kind of weird love apocalypse love is swept through all things all things are love
right there is literally there's a tsunami of love that is pouring into you right now
and as it turns out if you can't love yourself then you are the last part of the universe but
you see what i'm saying even you're the last part of the universe the one little piece of the
universe the one if especially if we get into the idea of solipsism or everything's a projection of
you if you're surrounded by love and it's all rushing into you then the final step in this
universe waking up and entering into this nirvanic bliss state for the rest of infinity
is for you to stop blocking the love the moment that you allow but in a way it almost sounds like
what i'm saying is negative thoughts isn't if it's like it's just the baby and me crying and i go come
here you're passing you i'm taking your passing judgment on the thoughts yeah what is it with
convergence what do you call it it's convergence that's a great word for no way when you talked
about it on the drunk history i did oh i did yes you said the whole world's gonna
where it's gonna be we're all gonna be machines that we're all gonna be thoughts and we're all
gonna be the the uh the oneness the singularity singularity there's a personal singularity you
know that your person can have and that's the moment that you really start loving yourself
and that's what you're doing there's no rush by the way there's no hurry to do this but
what i think about man if i'm being really hard on myself and really calling myself a piece of
shit or looking at decisions i made in the past i'm like you fucking idiot why would you ever do
that i i think to myself man is the same thing you're saying about a little kid i just think
what if you're treating your dog yeah so so wait i want to get one last question to sort of
explore here real quick which is fred the opening question fred asked i don't think we've answered
yet which is why is his reality that he's in when he's high and feels good and can take little trips
and can assess the world differently why is not what i don't want to call it reality why is not
that experience let's say more real than the experience or equally as important as the experience
he's having say right now is that wasn't that your question yeah well again maybe it's my judgment
so i define the real world as a guy who's 57 who's always alone who is not working as an actor
that's not the real world the real world of him feeling shitty as opposed to the real world
that's altered by a chemical where he feels good why is one but sometimes it's not altered it it
helps you get to something you need to get to my answer to that is it's all the same world you're
just yeah you're shifting the it's like if i have a glass of tea and i add sugar to it it's still tea
but now it's sweet tea if i add poison to it this is poison tea and and so it's very much like what
fred you were just saying which is it's all good yes it's all real it's all fine and it's all and
ultimately when you're in the more negative thing your self caretaking becomes more important and i
say it's good i learned to tell myself it's going to be okay i'll tell you what i do is like i learned
to do little things like uh you know when i can't find i'm late i can't find my glasses and my keys
on my wallet rather than i try to go i love myself i can't find my wallet i love myself i can't find
my keys rather than you piece of shit loser again right i'm literally a loser i can't you know so i
learned to just say i love weather it's weather i like i like the weather analogy it's those are
those those dark clouds that come in let them blow in let them blow through it's all good it's all
real it's cool it's just weather and also meant it's just weather another thing you can do when
you're talking about the 50 thing and the actor thing and all that stuff is imagine those are
pieces of a prison cell you're living in so when you when and you've outgrown it i have yes those
are not real let me tell me if there's the same thing i don't know um maybe it's i gotta go you
guys okay yeah you have a you have a meeting you have got good stuff yeah this is amazing you're
so cool friend no you are you i knew it's be good i knew it'd be good yeah you uh i need you to um
you gotta go but email me some books if we ever have time the denial of death the whole philosophy
is that about i'm obsessed with delusional people i wish i could be more delusional because
because i get scared because unless you have kids to live for we need delusions to stay alive
like oh this one man's show or i don't buy that cognition man that's not true i don't next pod
okay i gotta go to this meeting i'll give you i'll get me some books and the delusion of death
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