Ear Biscuits with Rhett & Link - 91: Let's Get Personal ft. Rhett & Link | Ear Biscuits Ep. 91

Episode Date: April 24, 2017

Rhett and Link talk about spreading their cheeks with proctologists and open their hearts about their growing children and the unforeseen life-changing circumstances that go along with it on this week...'s Ear Biscuits. SUBSCRIBE to This Is Mythical: https://goo.gl/UMXvuW Credits: Hosted By: Rhett & Link Executive Producer: Stevie Wynne Levine Managing Producer: Cody D'Ambrosio Editor: Meggie Malloy Graphics: Matthew Dwyer Set Design/Construction: Cassie Cobb Content Manager: Becca Canote Logo Design: Carra Sykes To learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Transcript
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Starting point is 00:00:00 This, this, this, this is Mythical. Welcome to Ear Biscuits, I'm Link. And I'm Rhett. This week at the round table of dim lighting, we have a very, very, very special episode. It's an episode that we thought you would never hear or more specifically see. Right, it is the lost episode of Ear Biscuits.
Starting point is 00:00:28 It actually was intended to be the first episode of season three of Ear Biscuits, but we had some technical difficulties because we were doing this video thing for the first time. It's important for us to set things off on the right track from the beginning. We didn't want a compromised episode to be the first episode of the video version of Ear Biscuits.
Starting point is 00:00:49 Ear Biscuits is back, you gotta make a big deal of it. So we shelved it. But it was a good conversation. Yeah, it was the very first one. There was a certain energy to the unknown of feeling our way through bringing the round table into the video format. We took, I mean we ended up burying our souls
Starting point is 00:01:12 or other body parts. Yeah. Not, I mean not physically. It gets very personal. But it gets very personal and then you know, from there we talked about, you know, I talked about some personal stuff that is happening in my family's life that ultimately,
Starting point is 00:01:30 having made the decision for us to talk about it, it was we wanted you to be able to hear it and experience it and share it with us. And we wanted to put this little intro on the beginning. I mean, obviously, there were no technical difficulties on the audio side, but we wanted to put this on intro on the beginning. I mean obviously there were no technical difficulties on the audio side but we wanted to put this on both the video and the audio version because we repeatedly refer to this episode being the first episode
Starting point is 00:01:54 of Ear Biscuits and you would be very, very confused if we didn't just put this little intro on orienting you to what's about to happen. So you'll just see the wide shot with one minor exception but other than that, it should feel like a normal ear biscuit experience. Yes, don't be alarmed, just accept it. With no, Open your ears.
Starting point is 00:02:15 Close up shots of us. If that's your thing, this isn't gonna be the one you wanna watch. Well you can maybe do your own Zooms and crops. Oh okay, that could be fun. Feel free to do your own Zooms and crops. I, okay. Feel free to do your own Zooms and crops. I don't think it's worth it. Just listen and enjoy.
Starting point is 00:02:29 This lost episode of Ear Biscuits. It's found, here it is. You already know how often we touch our hair. I mean, on Good Mythical Morning, but now it's gonna, I'm just really resisting the urge to touch my hair. Currently? Yeah, well I mean, I'm always, I wanna touch it all the time.
Starting point is 00:02:50 Yeah, you constantly wanna touch it. The hair. Yeah, okay. Your hair. So, a lot has happened since the end of season two of Ear Biscuits, and one of those things that has happened is a lot of people have asked, the end of season two of Ear Biscuits and one of those things that has happened is a lot of people have asked, when is Ear Biscuits coming back?
Starting point is 00:03:10 And we've been like, not anytime soon. That was sort of the standard line. Yeah. So we've been doing a lot of other things. Of course, Good Mythical Morning, going strong as always. Been working on our book. We did Buddy System this year,
Starting point is 00:03:26 last year, and there wasn't a place. But we still, I'm trying to figure out what it is that made us want to do it and I think it's, we still find ourselves having conversations between the two of us that no one else hears and I think in the back of our minds, we are just thinking, why am I just talking to this guy? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:03:47 I mean, we should probably monetize this. That is the thinking, right? Well, no, we should probably share this. Yeah, that's a, that's a, We should probably share this. That's a probably more palatable way to put it. And we save stuff to talk about on Good Mythical More, but we still end up talking.
Starting point is 00:04:06 We spend so much time together and every time we just talk to each other, is it pointless? No. It seems like you're questioning the foundations of our friendship now. I mean, are you saying that our friendship has become Seems like you're baiting me.
Starting point is 00:04:24 So outwardly focused that it is no longer for each, it's no longer for us and now it's just for the mythical beasts? I don't think that's the case. Then why do you wanna do this? To monetize it. No, no, so, well, you know. I'm gonna sit on my foot now.
Starting point is 00:04:42 Do whatever you want, you don't have to justify every physical action. And I'm gonna take my sweater halfway off. Do whatever you want. You don't have to justify every physical action. And I'm gonna take my sweater halfway off. You're gonna have to get to a place where you can just do the physical things without openly acknowledging them. Like you thinking about your hair and touching it? I'm helping you, you help me.
Starting point is 00:04:57 Leave it up. No, but I think the reason we wanna do this is because podcasting, I mean, really, when you talk about the things that we've done that are the favorite of the things that we have done, we enjoy a lot of different things for a lot of different reasons, but the times that we've had at this round table of Den Lighting, it's a totally different thing.
Starting point is 00:05:23 It's different than GMM, I mean, we're not gonna put any weird stuff on our head or eat something that makes us vomit, play a weird game, that's not what this is about. And of course it's not something that's been planned for months on end that is meticulously presented in the way that we want it to be presented, like Buddy System.
Starting point is 00:05:47 Okay, yeah, so this is. Or the book. But this scratches a niche, this is something. It's just a totally different thing. Well, it's totally unplanned. I think we've demonstrated we don't have a clue what we know we're gonna talk about. We haven't even talked about what today's show
Starting point is 00:05:59 is going to be about. Yeah, we've just, and so far. It is becoming that right now. So far it's just been us talking about doing it. Let's just keep that, how long can we stretch that out? This is too meta. We don't need to stretch anything out. You may appreciate this conversation
Starting point is 00:06:16 if you already are a fan of Ear Biscuits, but over six minutes in, at this point, if this is your first Ear Biscuit, you're like, is Ear Biscuits just a podcast about a podcast? No it's not. We're just kinda getting back in the swing of things. Oh yeah, we're getting loose.
Starting point is 00:06:31 We're getting into the groove, man. I might take my jacket off. Take your jacket off. I don't want to, it's such a plain t-shirt. It's take a shoulder off, but then put it back, that's what I did, I mean I've gone through so many iterations already. All right, there's a shoulder, I got a V-neck.
Starting point is 00:06:44 I recently heard, I mean I've gone through so many iterations already. All right there's a shoulder. I got a V-neck. I recently heard, okay, I wear a lot of V-necks. I'll just be honest with you. And I wear a lot of plain V-necks. You know Link's kind of the funky t-shirt guy and I'm the plain t-shirt guy. I might wear some patterns of colors that shouldn't go together on like a collared shirt,
Starting point is 00:07:05 that's kinda what I do. Oh yeah. But I'm not really a graphic tee kinda guy, you've sorta got that on lockdown. Do you feel like you can't purchase a tee with something on it? No no no no no. Because of me? No, I mean I don't like it when my t-shirt
Starting point is 00:07:19 says too many things, too too much. I like to keep people guessing like a ninja. Okay. So but I wear a V-neck and I wore one to a party recently and a friend of mine who is sort of equally a friend of my wife's as well, we were, he was talking to, he's a very fashionable person. You also know this person but I'm not gonna disclose
Starting point is 00:07:40 his name right now. Can I guess? No you can't guess. We're not gonna play a game. We don't play games. We don't play games. Was I at the party? No. You were not at this one.
Starting point is 00:07:49 Okay, that's fine. You weren't invited, I didn't tell you. Actually you were and you left early. I was there earlier. Yeah and he began to talk to my wife. At Sanchez's party? About my shirt. Let's call him Sanchez.
Starting point is 00:08:01 And Sanchez was like, you know, V-necks. He's very direct, he has a good relationship with my wife. He's like, you know, he really shouldn't, you know, V-necks are like five years ago. It's out. Five years ago, like a half decade. Ouch. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:08:20 How did I miss a half decade? V-necks are not working? Well look, well, Kacen, how long have you had that V-neck? Five months. Really? Yeah, I mean. Well, I've constantly, I mean first of all. I've never worn a V-neck because I knew they were going out.
Starting point is 00:08:33 No, the reason that you don't wear V-necks is because Don't bring me into this. You've told me this. I'm not making anything up that you haven't told me. You told me you don't wear V-necks because of the patch of hair that pops up. Too much hair, too much hair. And I don't have a whole lot, you know,
Starting point is 00:08:48 I gotta go a little bit lower than a deep V to get there, but I just can't believe that something that is as subtle as the shape of the collar is something that can go out of style. So I refute Sanchez. I don't believe that V-necks are out of style. I don't think that they actually can go out of style. I'm gonna keep wearing them unless the people
Starting point is 00:09:09 in the comments on one of the platforms where Ear Biscuits is enjoyed prove me wrong. I am all, yeah. So you're inviting you. Rhett is inviting you to let him know if V-necks are out. And don't just take his side because you like him. Be honest, I think this is a moment, an opportunity where you can help the guy.
Starting point is 00:09:34 I mean Sanchez took a risk and Rhett threw it in his face. I don't need a Sanchez. Later on a podcast that he's not listening to. Yeah I don't need a Sanchez. What'd you say to him at the time? I need a, well. Did you get defensive? I had walked out of the room. What'd you say to him at the time? I need a, well. Did you get defensive? I had walked out of the room.
Starting point is 00:09:46 Oh, he said it to her and you weren't even there. It was one of those things like when you gotta break up with a girl and you tell her friend. Ooh. Yeah, you gotta tell a man his v-neck's out of style, you tell his wife. Oh gosh. You go through the wife.
Starting point is 00:09:58 Five years ago, and how fashionable is Sanchez? Because I still don't know who you're talking about. He's pretty fashionable. I mean, I've taken some cues from him. Really? Yeah. Does he wear like the big round collars? No, no, no, he's not super neck.
Starting point is 00:10:12 Super neck? He doesn't wear super necks. Is that what they're called? I just made that up. He's fashionable though. I respect his fashion choices. But you know what? You're getting old, brother.
Starting point is 00:10:24 That's what it is, man. Well that is something that I was. Wear it proudly. You're old and I'm right behind you. Okay. I think that's what you've missed. I mean if that's what this podcast is about. We have aged.
Starting point is 00:10:36 But there's only certain things we can talk to you about and one of those is just that we're getting older. Well let's be more specific about that. Of course we're getting older. Everyone let's be more specific about that. Of course we're getting older. Everyone is getting older right now. Well. Except anyone who's beating the aging process. I'm glad you said that.
Starting point is 00:10:52 But. Because that makes me feel better. And we're not getting any older faster than anyone else is technically. However, I do feel, and I don't know how long it's been, it's been over a year since the end of season two of Ear Biscuits, well over a year. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:11:10 And I feel like in my life and in my body, more than a year has passed. That's how I feel. And when I think about life stage, when I think about. Like because we're working too hard? No, I'm just saying, when I think about life stage, when I think about. Like because we're working too hard? No, I'm just saying when I think about the things that have happened, when I think about the fact that both of us independently have scheduled trips
Starting point is 00:11:38 to see a proctologist. We're gonna talk about that. Within a week of one another. I'm fresh. That's a sign that something has changed. In the anus. Particularly yes, specifically. Like when you get old you get hemorrhoids?
Starting point is 00:11:57 Young people can get hemorrhoids. Oh so now you're gonna tell them why we went. Yeah, for hemorrhoids. I mean, I've had the condition. I'm not gonna say the H word anymore. I'm just gonna say the condition. So I mean it's official. We're talking about hemorrhoids now?
Starting point is 00:12:16 But the condition. You didn't wanna talk about them in general or specifically as it relates to us. I'll talk about the experience. I'll talk about going to a proctologist. Okay, do that. By the way, they're called. I'll listen.
Starting point is 00:12:32 They're called colorectal surgeons now. Which is scary right from the beginning. Right, it's like I'm just coming in to get surgery. When I was in the waiting room. On my butthole. And I saw the certificate of the doctor and it said colorectal surgeon. I was like whoa, I. On my butthole. And I saw the certificate of the doctor and it said colorectal surgery. I was like whoa, I didn't sign up for that.
Starting point is 00:12:50 I don't need rectal surgery. That's not what I'm here for. I just got a little discomfort. Well the guy that I went to because I went to a different guy because I just didn't want to, I just didn't, I felt like that would be too intimate between the two of us if I went to the same guy that,
Starting point is 00:13:07 if he did that to you and then he did it to me, what if we showed up at the same time? What if he put us in the same room because we're friends? It's like going on a date with the same girl within a week of each other. It's a sloppy second situation. It's like, it's like.
Starting point is 00:13:22 Except it's the reverse because he's sticking his finger in our butts. Oh gosh like, it's like. Except it's the reverse because he's sticking his finger in our butts. Oh gosh. Well it's like. I'm just being honest, that's what happens. When you go to a proctologist, that's what happens. That is what happens. It's just standard fare.
Starting point is 00:13:35 Well, I went in. We're talking about this though. Just letting it register. Okay, here it is. I'm not gonna let it register, that way I'll just keep talking about it. You'll keep talking about it. Yeah, you'll keep talking about it. Well this goes back, man.
Starting point is 00:13:47 I mean, this is not like within the last year, my aging is accelerating in like the anal region. Exactly, well let me explain. Because it's not the condition that is a sign of aging, it's the willingness to see someone about it that is a result of aging. Because hemorrhoids are very common. Like I do a lot of Google searches for medical conditions
Starting point is 00:14:11 because I'm a little bit of a hypochondriac. I haven't really disclosed that before but I have now. And so if I see something. I thought it was hypochondriac. I think that's someone who doesn't worry. That's me. I don't know, is it hypochondriac or hypochondriac? Because we gotta be right about this because I am that.
Starting point is 00:14:30 Link, you're right, it's hypochondriac. A person who is abnormally anxious about their health. Yes. As opposed to a hypochondriac, someone who is Search that. Really fast and concerned about their health. Hypochondriac is a common mispronunciation. Mispronunciation.
Starting point is 00:14:51 Someone who when they believe they have something, they search it really fast. Uh-oh, a hypochondriac is one who thinks there is nothing wrong with them despite medical evidence that they got symptoms of a disease. Are you kidding me? So that's what I am. So I was exactly wrong, they're both words?
Starting point is 00:15:12 No, maybe that's the Urban, is that the Urban Dictionary? But hypochondriac.org. Oh this is fake news guys. But you're right. Let's go back. But let me finish the point. I'm a hypochondriac, just like my mom, just like my brother. My dad does not have this gene.
Starting point is 00:15:32 He's a hypochondriac. We worry about ourselves and when we see things. And when I, you can Google a condition, and because so many people Google conditions, Google has figured out that it would be most beneficial and efficient if they put up the nature of the problem and how common it is so you don't have to go into WebMD or the like in order to just make yourself silly.
Starting point is 00:16:02 So when you look up hemorrhoids, which incidentally, Say the condition. Impossible to spell without spell correction. There's more M's than you think. I can spell it now because it's been corrected so many times, but no person, I believe this strongly, no person has ever just correctly spelled the condition, and of course I'm talking about hemorrhoids
Starting point is 00:16:25 when I say the condition for the last time. When just on a whim, just tried to spell it. But it's very common, so it's not, I think up to like 30 to 40% of the population will report having the condition in their lifetime. So like it's. Well if that many people report it, how many people don't report it?
Starting point is 00:16:43 70 to 80. Right, so then 100% of people have it. We've all got hemorrhoids from time to time. The condition. Sorry, the condition. I remember when mine popped up or literally popped out. I mean it was. Oh come on.
Starting point is 00:16:58 We were in New York City at the jail conference and you know, I don't live in New York and when I visit, there's this expectation and the whole city's set up so that you can walk around everywhere and we were supposed to write and perform a song at the same time on stage at a conference called the Jell Conference.
Starting point is 00:17:19 I remember this. And I was really, I was anxious about that and I think, you know, my sphincter gets tight when I get anxious. I just like. Can you use code words? My condition place gets tight. Yeah, there we go.
Starting point is 00:17:35 That's where I hold, some people hold the stress in their shoulders. Let me just butt in a second. Okay. And say that, again. This is the first one. This is the death knell. This is so bad. This is the first one. This is the death knell. This is so bad.
Starting point is 00:17:46 This is season three, episode one. We've decided to film it and we're talking about the condition. I just, I wanna. You're probably thinking, are they gonna show the condition spot? I want, no, no, no. We're not.
Starting point is 00:17:59 You don't need, yeah. We're not gonna be that stupid. You need to just chill. I'm so chill right now. This isn't what the podcast is going to be. Ear Biscuits is not going to be us talking about this stuff. The condition or our conditions.
Starting point is 00:18:13 Again. But we have to get it out of our system. We don't know what it's gonna be about and somehow this early it has become about us talking about our condition. But what I'm saying is I just apologize and you can stop listening now. I'm sorry. Or watching.
Starting point is 00:18:29 It's gonna keep happening. No one would blame you. So I'm walking around the NYC. Yeah, New York City. With my W-I-P-E. Yeah, that's a wife. And you and your wife. Yeah, it's me and my wife. And at one point I just remembered feeling. Oh gosh.
Starting point is 00:18:48 It's like, it's just like, it's like now. It didn't feel right, man. And it scared the po-bonkey out of me. Okay. Po-bonkey, I had to make up a word. I mean, upon further inspection, a little bit later, I was like, oh, that. I mean upon further inspection a little bit later I was like oh that, I mean it's like, I didn't immediately know it was the condition.
Starting point is 00:19:11 I thought it was like, I didn't know what it was. You thought you were dying. But it was very scary. Most people think they're dying. I asked my wife to look at it. Oh gosh, that's intimacy. Yeah, I mean, it scared her. And then, I mean, it scared her. And then, I mean,
Starting point is 00:19:28 I didn't do anything about it, and it kinda went away for the most part, but I've lived with it for eight years. Yeah, and you've complained about it quite a bit. But at a certain point, you get of a certain age, and you reach a certain level of discomfort, and a couple other symptoms start to make an appearance. And then you're like, man, I gotta get in there.
Starting point is 00:19:51 I no longer care if this means I have to let someone who I meet within seconds put their finger in my rectum. It just, I don't care anymore. And you know what? I'm that uncomfortable. Okay and you will tell us about your trip to the proctologist because that's so intriguing and I will tell them about my trip to the proctologist.
Starting point is 00:20:13 Yes you will. But first, Lincoln I'll tell you what it was like in my bed last night. Yes please don't, don't do it, okay. Only if this is for a product. It is, it's for a product. It's for the parachute sheets that we were given to try out.
Starting point is 00:20:31 Right. I put them, along with my wife, put them on the bed last night. Okay, team building exercise? Oh yeah, we didn't fight at all when we put them on because we were just talking about the finish. She was like, yes, I went with the sateen finish. We'd never done that before.
Starting point is 00:20:46 A little bit of a sheen there. I got in, it was smooth as silk. I had an incredible night's sleep. Wow. I'm not making this up, man. And you haven't put yours on your bed yet, but you have yours, they're in the back of your car. I put the box in the back of your car.
Starting point is 00:21:01 Really? You have the opportunity to sleep on them tonight and then you can tell me what you think. Did you experience the premium quality that only gets softer with time? Yeah, I think it got softer throughout the night. Okay, well did you experience the way they were made responsibly?
Starting point is 00:21:16 100% natural with no harmful chemicals or synthetic softeners? Yeah, I felt no harmful chemicals, no softeners, no synthetic softeners. Did you experience that they were giving back by partnering with the United Nations Foundation's Nothing But Nets campaign to donate life-saving malaria prevention bed nets?
Starting point is 00:21:33 Yeah, I thought I felt that. Yeah, I thought I felt that. That is sweet. Right around the leg area. Okay, I am sold, what do I do? You visit Parachute. I put them on the bed because I've got mine. You've got them. But our listeners. I'm getting some more for my because I've got mine. You've got them. But our listeners.
Starting point is 00:21:45 I'm getting some more for my loved ones. Our listeners have a special offer here. They can visit parachutehome.com slash ear for free shipping and returns. And they get a 60-night trial. If they don't love it, they just send it back, no questions asked. That is parachutehome.com slash ear
Starting point is 00:22:01 for free shipping and returns. Nice. Tell us about the proctologist. You went before me. So why don't you? I think I may have told this story at some point. Maybe I didn't. Yeah, I went five years ago for the first time.
Starting point is 00:22:18 That's right. Five years ago when I was having my own issues with the condition while we were traveling around making. I was talking about two weeks ago. Commercial Kings. You went two weeks ago, right? I went five years ago. That was the first time the guy said that's my finger.
Starting point is 00:22:32 Well tell me that story. As he. Proper. Yeah. Tell me the proper story. Well I mean it was very, the only thing I remember is the thing I'm trying to forget. You know what I'm saying?
Starting point is 00:22:42 That's the situation that I'm in right now. Yeah but tell me. I mean not that I'm into it but. I just remember he'm saying? That's the situation that I'm in right now. Yeah but tell me. I mean not that I'm into it but. I just remember he said. I just wanna know if my experience was the same. Well, from the first time? From the first time. Well the first time he said,
Starting point is 00:22:55 he came in there and he was like, I'm gonna have you drop your drawers, you can leave your shirt on. He said drawers? Which makes, well I'm paraphrasing. Five years ago he said take your pants off, leave your shirt on, which made me feel like a cartoon character.
Starting point is 00:23:10 And, because personally, if I'm taking my pants off, I feel like I should take my shirt off too. There's no, you feel so much more vulnerable when you're just bottom half naked than when you're just completely naked. Completely naked is like warrior. Bottom half naked is, I should be violated. You know what I'm saying?
Starting point is 00:23:28 And I think they do that. I think he tells you, keep your top on because they're trying to humiliate you. Humiliate you. Yeah, yeah, exactly. You're like Snoopy or Mickey, man, you're right. Yogi. Yogi.
Starting point is 00:23:40 Yogi wore a tie, actually. I had on a shirt, not just a tie. Take off everything but put on this tie. But then he says, me and Marissa, I don't remember her name, me and Marissa will be in in a second, I'm like, well who's Marissa? You know, and all of a sudden there's the doctor who's a man. You remember her name.
Starting point is 00:23:58 And Marissa, no I'm making it up, but again paraphrasing, who's a woman, and not just a woman, like straight out of school, like too young for my comfort level. This is not about your comfort level, it's about the lack of it. Well, that's all I was thinking about, and he's like, okay, bend over,
Starting point is 00:24:19 and then the next thing he said was, that's my finger, and of course what he meant by that is, that's my finger inside of you right now. Already. That was my finger. Because it could be anything. He was confirming that it was the finger and he investigated, did the doctor thing
Starting point is 00:24:37 that he needed to do and I put my pants back on and he was like, well yeah, you've got the condition but it's not too serious and here's some something and going about your business. And I've had a good five year stretch, well that's probably a bad word. I've had a good five years where things have been okay. But then recently when you started talking about
Starting point is 00:25:02 how you needed to see a doctor again, I was like, you know. That gave you the itch. To tell you the truth, my condition has never resolved itself and I think I need to go back again, getting closer to 40, should probably go. And this time it was basically the same exact situation
Starting point is 00:25:18 but the doctor was much more personable. Was Marissa, did Marissa say anything? You left that out. She gave me no compliments, if that's what you're asking. She said nothing. I think they. Second time around, no Marissa? I think no, there was no Marissa for stage one
Starting point is 00:25:35 this time around and first of all, I don't know how your doctor had you do it but my doctor had me get on my side like a baby. Fetal position. In the fetal position and that was his angle of approach. Whereas the first guy, it was bending over a table. Oh wow. So I definitely preferred the,
Starting point is 00:25:52 it's more comfortable to be in the fetal position because you already feel like a baby. You know, it's like having your temperature taken. So. Yeah, when you bend over, it's like you're being punished. Yeah, and so I was more comfortable, we had quite a conversation while I was in this position. And then Marissa came in, again, another lady.
Starting point is 00:26:12 I will just always call anyone who was assisting a colorectal surgeon, Marissa. But it was another woman. Yeah, and that was when he went, he did it like a, They don't care. He did a, he put a camera in there. And I'm not talking like a DSLR. I mean, it's just a camera that was.
Starting point is 00:26:30 Oh, that's a DSLR going in there? I gotta get my Instagram updated. After he updated his Instagram. Marissa. You don't update it. What do you mean update an Instagram? You know, keep it up to date. Man, you wearing your V-neck shirt,
Starting point is 00:26:48 it's talking about, I don't even use Instagram and I know the verb is not update it. Post, okay. I don't know what it is but it's not. Posted to Instagram? Oh he just updated his Instagram, is that it? What I was trying to do was make a joke about how, you know, that's what the doctor does,
Starting point is 00:27:02 he takes a picture of your butthole for his Instagram. But actually it was a camera that's just designed for the butt. Do you have it, can I see it? No, it's not disposable and you don't get to keep it. They take it out. And he said, Do you have the picture?
Starting point is 00:27:21 He said come back in three weeks, which that's another week for me. Oh nice. Which incidentally. Which we'll make another podcast. He's monitoring something, in case you're wondering. I'm gonna be okay. Is he monitoring it right now?
Starting point is 00:27:34 Is there a camera constantly? He removed it. But you also have a come back in three weeks situation from what I heard, what you told me, but you didn't give me the details because you said you would give me the details here on the show. Well the doctor, the nurse asked me questions.
Starting point is 00:27:50 We're halfway through this by the way, we're still talking about it. But you know. Well it's important. Yeah. To get it out. And she was asking me all this history questions while I'm fully clothed.
Starting point is 00:28:03 Marissa? Yeah, Marissa. She's everywhere. She, then as she's leaving the room, she's like, take off your pants and your underwear and put on this gown. You got a gown? I got a gown.
Starting point is 00:28:14 Shh, I didn't get it. But I did leave my shirt on and I put my gown over that. But it was open in the back and I sat back down and then he comes in and he talks to me a little bit and the whole time he's talking to me, I'm like looking at his hand. Yeah. I'm like.
Starting point is 00:28:32 Does he have tiny hands? No. And I think he could tell I was looking at his hand because he kept moving it up by his face to like try to make eye contact with me. Follow the hand, Mr. Neal. See, a visual joke. Yeah, right, I could do that.
Starting point is 00:28:54 You got him. Yeah, if you're listening to the audio version of your biscuits, when Link said move the hand, I took my hand and put it into the Spock symbol and put it over my right eye. It was very funny in the video version. It worked. Not to make you feel left out.
Starting point is 00:29:14 I think most people could enjoy both. Do not enjoy the video version of Ear Biscuits while driving down the lanes. Unless you're in the backseat watching on a screen. So I didn't hear anything he said. I was just waiting for him to say bend over or roll over or whatever. Like a dog.
Starting point is 00:29:33 And he said, I want you to lay on your right side. Your right side, huh? The first thing he said was. I was on my left side. It's like he was talking and I was answering very specific questions about the condition and the sensations and the history of it and he's like,
Starting point is 00:29:49 well let's take a look. And that's when I'm like, you know. You gotta keep breathing, that's the key. Gotta keep breathing. He's like lay on your right side. So I got in the fetal position and I'm facing the wall, much better than the bent over position. I think that, I mean I just can't imagine having to do,
Starting point is 00:30:05 you've done it both ways. But I agree with your preference. And he did not give me any warning. He was just poked right in there. Did it make that noise? So I think I could diagnose that, you have a problem. It's not supposed to make a cartoon noise. He had to pop a bubble.
Starting point is 00:30:25 Oh gosh. No, he didn't. And it didn't feel great and then it was like, I'm gonna go four quadrants. Oh really? And I want you to tell me how that feels. So it's like, who knew it had four quadrants? It's like, is it a good thing that I got four quadrants?
Starting point is 00:30:41 I think everything has four quadrants. Well he divided it into four but it's a circle. I think that's the definition of a quadrant is just dividing something into four. He did, he did. He was like this quadrant, how does it, you know he's like rate the pain here, here, here and here. And I let him know that at certain points,
Starting point is 00:31:00 there was a quadrant hot spot. No need to get more. You've already gotten pretty specific. But I mean it was like, please let this be over quickly, man. And then it was and I sit back up and I talk to him and he had on a glove at that point. I was like, oh I didn't see him put on a glove.
Starting point is 00:31:25 I guess he had on the glove the whole time. That would be proper. Well yeah. Yeah, but I didn't remember him putting on a glove. You thought he was going bare-handed? Yeah, at one point I felt like I needed to stop and ask him, but he didn't, and the glove was coming off at that point.
Starting point is 00:31:43 But then he's like talking, talking, talking, and I'm like just trying to recover from the moment. And the whole time I'm thinking, when this is over, am I gonna shake his hand? Mm-mm. So my hands were back, I was like propped up. I was propped back on the bench, the seat, the table thingy. And then he tells me everything, on the bench, the seat, the table thingy.
Starting point is 00:32:08 And then he tells me everything, he's like, well I want you to try this shrinking suppository. So I'm doing that for a couple weeks and then come back. And I'm like okay, and I'm not extending my hands or anything and then he's like, any questions? I'm like nope, I look at the hand and then he's like, it's like, any questions? I'm like, nope, I look at the hand and then he's like, well let me summarize and he summarizes everything and then it's like, I keep thinking it's gonna be over and then he's like, here comes the hand
Starting point is 00:32:33 and then I of course shook his hand, I'm not gonna deny it. He took the glove off though. The glove was off at this point and I shook the hand but it did feel weird, I mean, he didn't shake my hand when he first met me. And he had just, I mean while I was waiting, I heard like uncomfortable sounds from the room next door. Oh really?
Starting point is 00:32:54 Yeah I could hear through the wall, he was in there with another person and it was not going well. At one point I heard someone say, are you gonna be able to drive home? Oh gosh. This is right before he comes in. You had a bad experience.
Starting point is 00:33:10 This is right before he comes in. Are you gonna be able to drive home? Yeah, my guy, there was nobody, I was the first one there, no one else was in the waiting room, there was nobody else having to question whether or not they were gonna drive home. Wow, what was he doing to that guy?
Starting point is 00:33:24 I don't wanna know. Me neither, man. I think we can move on now. What did we learn here though? I mean, I think it's gonna happen multiple times over the next couple of months. I mean, they want us both back. Yeah, I just think that.
Starting point is 00:33:39 It's gonna be more probing. I think that part of getting older. And I went to the dentist this morning. I mean I got it going in both orifices. But that's pretty, I mean the dentist is kind of a normal thing. It's kind of a normal thing. Every six months.
Starting point is 00:33:53 But I'm seeing a pattern here. I'm just, I'm getting comfortable with just getting in a chair or on a table and people are just inserting stuff. Well, professionals are. Professionals, yes. Let's be very specific. That's important.
Starting point is 00:34:10 I'm getting comfortable with that. I think that's part of getting older is understanding that, yeah, you're moving into this stage. You're moving into the stage where you have to be evaluated by professionals physically in order to make sure that you make it through the next half of your life, man. We're havers, man. That's what's happening.
Starting point is 00:34:30 I don't know what the current life expectancy for an American male is, but I gotta assume we're like halfway there. I mean that's literally what is happening to us right now. You don't think it's in the mid 80s? What is the life expectancy for an adult male American? And I'm gonna guess that the answer is. 84.
Starting point is 00:34:56 You think it's 84? I would say it's 81 for a male. And then for a female, 85. I would say it's 85 for a female. I'm saying 84 and 86. And then Rhett is saying 81 and 85. Okay, so it was 78. Oh, 78.
Starting point is 00:35:14 What did I say? Man, you said 81. No, for a man I said 81? I don't remember what you said. Link, either way you look at it, we're more than halfway there, man. You're at, I'm exactly halfway there. And here's the problem.
Starting point is 00:35:31 I'm exactly halfway there and you're almost halfway there. The problem is people have just started putting their finger in our butts. Yeah and that's all we've got to look forward to for the next 40 years. We should have been spreading it out. Use a better analogy, man. We should have been spreading it out. Use a better analogy, man. We should have been allowing that to happen much earlier.
Starting point is 00:35:49 If there's a certain amount of finger pokes that you get. The finger pokes don't have any impact or effect in the first 40 years. I felt an impact. Most people don't need them. But another thing that has happened, because I think we should stop talking about the condition. Yeah let's move, let's move away from it.
Starting point is 00:36:11 Another thing that has happened is since the last time we made an Ear Biscuit, we both have teenager children now. Yeah Lily turned 13 a year ago and Locke just turned 13. Just turned 13. Now. So we both have 13 year olds.
Starting point is 00:36:35 And I mean my son wasn't even with me when he turned 13. He was in Africa. It's funny because Lily was in China. Well look at us. We sent him away to become teenagers. Like go to the other side of the Earth if you're gonna become a teenager. She had, I mean.
Starting point is 00:36:53 Don't be with me. Lily had a friend who's, one of her best friend's dad was working for Disney, building the park over there. Yeah. Building the Shanghai Disney. Right. So they lived over there for,
Starting point is 00:37:12 I can't remember how many months, four months, six months maybe? I think they were over there almost a year, is what I remember. Maybe, but um. But Lily went over for a couple weeks. She went over for a couple of weeks with friends of the, with family members,
Starting point is 00:37:24 so she flew over there with them and she turned 13 and we didn't, you know, we didn't. Didn't even send her a card. It turned out, you know, she made it. Turned out we didn't need to be there for her to become a teenager. Right, it still happens whether you're there or not. It's not like quantum mechanics.
Starting point is 00:37:43 And then Locke turned 13 in Africa because he went there with my wife, one of his friends, again, it's a friend connection, one of his friends has started a charity over there helping to build schools and giving kids resources and access to health services and that kind of thing and he went over there giving kids resources and access to health services and that kind of thing. And he went over there with some of his friends and he was in a hut.
Starting point is 00:38:11 I mean so they did a lot of things. They were in Uganda but there was one night, the day of his birthday, where they went to like a remote village. So I mean they stayed in like a relatively nice hotel and they stayed in some different places but there was the time that they went to the remote village and it was like we're going to let you guys see
Starting point is 00:38:28 what it's like to stay in a hut, literally a hut, like is somebody's house. It's not like, hey, let's bring the western tourists in and have them stay in a museum piece. No, it's like this is someone's home that you stay in. So Jesse and Locke stayed in this person's home and inside of a mosquito net. You know you had to have a mosquito net. Yeah sure.
Starting point is 00:38:50 Even though they had all their like malaria stuff before they went, they had to be in the mosquito net and he turned 13. In a mosquito net, that's cool. In this mosquito net. And what did he say about it? I mean, was it, they sleep in the mosquito net or was it just for them?
Starting point is 00:39:07 No, yeah. They all sleep in the mosquito net, right? If you have access to a mosquito net, you use it. Yeah, yeah. In fact, that's one of the easiest ways to help people in Africa is with mosquito nets. It actually is the most effective way that you can give, that you can donate in terms of how your dollar impacts saving a human life
Starting point is 00:39:27 is through a mosquito net. Anyway, so they had a birthday party for him in this little village and they made a cake for him and they thought his name was Rocky. How did that happen? Because his name is Locke and they brought him up front and they were like, Rocky? And he was like, yeah, he didn't want to,
Starting point is 00:39:47 so they sang happy birthday to Rocky. So not only did he become 13, now we call him Rocky. He's got a new name. Yeah, he got a whole new name. He came back from Africa with a new name, a new identity. Rocky, he's gonna be a boxer. But I wrote this, I wrote in his card, and I try to, I always write a rather.
Starting point is 00:40:13 Legibly, you try to write legibly. Well and I try to write a rather lengthy, meaty, somewhat substantial thing in their birthday cards or whatever. Yeah, yeah. My wife got me into that because that's kind of, her family always, my family on the other hand was always like the way that my mom has always written
Starting point is 00:40:36 in birthday cards has been like she'll take what the card says inside and she'll like underline three words. Yeah, yeah. So she'll like take what was written inside the card, which is the perfect thing that she selected and bought and then she'll add her own emphasis. Emphasis added by Diane. And then she'll be like what he said.
Starting point is 00:40:55 And then of course she says. Just above here. And she will write a couple of sentences and that's how I always was. I was like listen, these people know that I love them and I can communicate that in other ways than sitting down and writing a card. But then when I met Jessie, it was like,
Starting point is 00:41:10 oh no, her family does things different. So they would write very long, in fact, you had to write a well thought out, long, different thing. It couldn't be the same thing that you said last year. Because they keep it. Right. And they'll compare. And so now, I'm writing things
Starting point is 00:41:26 for Valentine's Day and for birthday for my wife, and of course I'm writing something thoughtful, but I think this is, it's a better tradition. I think this is a good adaptation that our family has made. This is a good thing that you're being forced to do. Because I think that the kids will look back and think like, okay, this is what, this is where I was in my life,
Starting point is 00:41:44 and this is what my dad was communicating to me, and also, hopefully, this is what, this is where I was in my life and this is what my dad was communicating to me and also hopefully something that I say now will have some sort of impact. But I just start thinking, I'm just like, man, he's 13. He is who he's going to be. Like that's what, I'm just like, I mean, I should write something thoughtful and I'm not saying, I'm not saying I'm no longer parenting
Starting point is 00:42:05 but you just start thinking it's just like, in a lot of ways, it's over. With our teenagers, we can guide and we can help direct and we can be there and we can answer questions and we can help them make good decisions and we're gonna continue to do all those things but when it comes to the core of who they are as a person, the kind of person that they're gonna be, it is largely determined.
Starting point is 00:42:31 It has largely been determined. Well, that's not gonna keep us from continuing to try. Oh, you keep trying, but I'm just. So you wrote, I mean, is that what you wrote? I wrote. You wrote something in there. I said you are who you are. No, you didn't. Hasta la vista, no. No, I said you are who you are. No you didn't. Hasta la vista.
Starting point is 00:42:45 No, I, no, I, I. And he opened it in the mosquito net? Well I don't know, I haven't talked to him about the opening of the card. You should ask him about it. What I'm trying to say is that I wanted it to be impactful and I wanted it to be substantial and I wanted it to be like this is from my dad and I'm turning 13, this is a big deal
Starting point is 00:43:06 and I said all those things. And I think it was meaningful. I haven't talked to him about it but I'm sure it was meaningful. He hasn't brought it up but I'm sure it impacted him. But what I was thinking as I was writing it is like man, 13 years have passed. It's like if this was 100 years ago,
Starting point is 00:43:23 I'd be like son, good luck with your farm, you know what I mean? Yeah, and your wife and three kids or whatever. I'd be sending him off, I'd be like, he'd have a woman and they'd be going off and they'd have a family. Yes. You know, like a year from now.
Starting point is 00:43:36 And you'd be dying. Yeah, and I would've died already, life expectancy being what it was. For Lily, we gave her a journal and then I wrote. So she does the writing. Yeah, it's like write me something. No, I wrote a big thing at the front of the journal that was basically a very similar thing like,
Starting point is 00:43:57 hey, this is my fatherly perspective on where you are and this is a big trip for you. And then there was inspirational assignments. Like I want you to write in this journal to remember the things that are happening. I want you to write something every day. You know, I probably got a little overbearing. It was like write something in a journal every day
Starting point is 00:44:19 and here's a list of questions that will fill a half a page of me just writing those out of questions that you can ask yourself and reflect on. Like about the culture and how things are different. I just, you know, I wanted to empower her to reflect and remember stuff. You gave like thought starters. Thought starters.
Starting point is 00:44:39 You created like a journal that you could have sold to any child who was going to China. A workbook, yeah. That's a business idea. You know, you find out where the kid's going and you give them a series of questions. And then when she came back, she was like, look at all the pictures I took.
Starting point is 00:44:55 Ooh, she didn't answer your questions. Well, I mean, it was, Does she still have the journal? It's her prerogative, you know? I think that, I don't know if she wrote in the journal every day. I didn't feel like it was my business to police the journal.
Starting point is 00:45:07 It was like, hey, this is, maybe I'm actually being a little overbearing and giving specific assignments. But you know. That's how I would interpret it, but it's okay. Right, I know I have a tendency to do that. So that's why on the back end, I'm like, I'm not gonna demand that I read the journal. I mean, it is her journal.
Starting point is 00:45:23 It was her prerogative to write stuff in it or not. And again, that's the best I can do. I can give journals, I can give cards at Valentine's Day that say how amazing she is and things like that. I think the best we can do is when, you know, it's whatever life throws at you and our kids that they're able to respond and life doesn't crush them but they own it, you know?
Starting point is 00:45:54 It's like I'm grabbing life by the horns. I wanna be a proctologist, I'm gonna do it. Well that's not the horns. I understand what that means but that's what I wanna do with my life. I've told her that she probably shouldn't do it but she's do it. Well that's not the horse. I understand what that means, but that's what I wanna do with my life. I've told her that she probably shouldn't do it, but she's into it. I was trying to bring it back to the proctology.
Starting point is 00:46:11 You're not biting, that's okay. No. But I can talk about this. We, you know, I'll tell you guys, I took, speaking of Lily, we took her in for just an annual checkup and the doctor diagnosed, well the doctor said, you know they always check for scoliosis. I think it's just something you do every year.
Starting point is 00:46:37 They did it for us in school. She, they had concerns, sent her to a specialist and then to make a very long story short, she was diagnosed with severe scoliosis. Yeah. We get the x-ray, the specialist looks at it, and we look at this thing and her back is like an S. I mean it just, it floored us.
Starting point is 00:47:01 And you know, when weored us and you know, when we were driving to the specialist, we knew that she had curves. We had done research about, well given certain measurements, does that mean that there's gonna be bracing, that she has to wear a brace as she goes through puberty, as she goes through a growth spurt, to not correct it but just to stop the curve
Starting point is 00:47:29 from getting worse so that after she's through a growth spurt, it's something that many people are just live with and have a normal life even though their spine is curved. Or does this mean something more? Does this mean surgery? Or some other course of action that the internet and the first doctor hadn't told us yet.
Starting point is 00:47:53 So on the way to the specialist, I'm riding, Lily's riding with me and then Christy's driving separately so that I can leave and come to, I have to come into work. We had to shoot something that day. And so I was gonna take her, have some time with her, and then she was gonna ride back with Christy. And I just remember telling her on the way there, based on the measurements of your curves
Starting point is 00:48:18 and the research that I've done on the internet, which is all the information I can find so far, I just feel like whatever it is, we're gonna figure this out, we're gonna get through this, but I'm confident that it's not gonna be surgery. The doctor's not gonna tell us surgery. Like I actually told her that. I just felt, I felt confident based on how the curves were measured.
Starting point is 00:48:45 But then when we get in with the specialist, his measurements were A, more accurate, you know, that's why you go to a specialist for the specialization, and they were worse. And I think in retrospect, he's dealt with this so much, he knew that it takes a while to sink in. He gave us all the information and it was in a masterful way but it's almost impossible for it all to sink in.
Starting point is 00:49:16 But basically the first thing he told us was these are where her curves are, this is what this means, these are the facts, this is what research has taught us, this is what experience has taught us, therefore we're recommending spinal fusion surgery for Lily, of course it's me, Christy, and Lily in the room. And he's explaining a lot of it. And I just didn't think he was gonna say that, you know?
Starting point is 00:49:47 So it absolutely floored me, like Christy and I were just speechless and the doctor, he was very understanding and he allowed us to ask questions but there was that moment where it was like, I don't know what to say, we're gonna have to regroup on this, but then you catch your breath and you ask questions, and we asked some clarifying questions
Starting point is 00:50:12 about what that meant, what all the alternatives were. Well, and to clarify, because it's such a major surgery, I mean, because a lot of people will be like, don't get surgery, so I mean, you've gotten a second opinion. You've talked to multiple people. Yeah, we've gotten, I mean, since then, yeah, we've gotten a second opinion and a third opinion and we've explored many other options,
Starting point is 00:50:40 many different types of procedures and come to the conclusion that yes, this is the right decision for Lily. But it's not the, and so surgery is scheduled for not too far down the road, but. And it's like, you know, it's pretty much the whole middle of her back, you know, it's like. It's major. It's major.
Starting point is 00:51:05 It's major. But in that moment, when we're sitting there, I look at Lily and like we're floored and I mean she was surprised but I was just, I was surprised that her reaction was, well, I know what I wanna do but I wanna hear what you guys think. It's like that's what she said.
Starting point is 00:51:25 So then we were like, well, this is not an easy decision. It's probably not, we're not gonna make it right here in the doctor's office. We're gonna have to think about this and look at all of our options. Right. And she was like, you know, if this is what needs to happen, I'm ready to do it, you know.
Starting point is 00:51:43 If the surgery's the right thing, I wanna do it. And it wasn't, her first reaction wasn't fear, it was okay, if this is how we have to move forward, then let's do it. I reflected on that a lot and I was, what we left, I mean, we left the doctor's office, we went out, we got in the van and it was like the three of us and we talked about it some more and we cried.
Starting point is 00:52:09 You know, all three of us cried because it was, of course it was and it is very scary. But the fact that, you know, as a 13 year old to be struck with such scary news that she wasn't dominated by fear. She wasn't debilitated by it. She was able to have, I don't know if, I don't wanna say it was a mature response.
Starting point is 00:52:43 For her, her honest response was okay, let's engage. Let's figure it was a mature response. For her, her honest response was, okay, let's engage, let's figure this out. She handled it better than you. She handled it better than I did, yeah. Than Christy did. Yeah, than I did, certainly. And we've had more conversations, there's been more tears, there's been a lot of,
Starting point is 00:52:59 I mean, a lot of just being honest and staying on the same page and trying to figure it out. But I mean, my point is, it's times like that that you figure out who your kid is as a person. And you start to look at your kid not as a kid anymore but as another human. You know, it's like it could be, yeah, it could be you, it could be me,
Starting point is 00:53:25 it could be, you know, stuff's gonna hit all of us. And what you realize is that, you know, we like to take a lot of credit for things, you know? Right, right. But the fact is is that her response to that situation is not something that you taught her or your wife taught her because I know you and your wife and know that if you were personally impacted by that,
Starting point is 00:53:47 you would, and if I was personally impacted by that, like we've already established I'm a hypochondriac. It's in my genes to just worry about that. Like if I was facing that, you know, I've told the story before when I found out that I had herniated discs which can in some cases, some extreme cases result in a spinal fusion surgery of just a couple of vertebrae.
Starting point is 00:54:12 Yeah. I fainted when the doctor told me that I had herniated discs. In the room by yourself and then when he came. He told me and he left the room and then I fainted because I was freaking out. And you came to before he came back in and then you acted like nothing happened.
Starting point is 00:54:27 But I think we should take some comfort in that. Yeah. All of us as individuals and as parents because the fact is is that you do what you can. This is not advocating for not parenting. This is advocating definitely for parenting and supporting and being there. But it's also kind of taking the pressure off yourself
Starting point is 00:54:47 because you could not have done anything to prepare Lily for that situation because you personally as a mature adult were not prepared for it, but it was in her disposition to be prepared for that moment. I mean, and it certainly. It's not like it's easy for her, I'm not saying that.
Starting point is 00:55:06 Well it's a little bit, it's both factors. I mean you do everything you can to raise your kid and I mean it's not the first hard time we've been through and you figure that out as a family, everything you go through and you learn from all that stuff. I mean we are having an impact on who our kids are. Well yes, but I'm saying that side of it is the side that you always hear, right?
Starting point is 00:55:34 That's the side that you hear in all the parenting books. I mean parenting books, the whole parenting book market is completely based on the presumption that you can have a drastic impact on the lives of your children. And you can. But that sells books and it gives people jobs and nobody wants to hear, well, your kid is also, for a lot of other reasons, both nature and nurture
Starting point is 00:56:00 and things that are outside of your control, going to be a certain way. Nobody wants to hear that because it makes you feel powerless and it makes you feel like you don't have a lot of control. But it doesn't mean that it's not largely true. In fact, I was listening to a podcast, I can't remember which one it was, but one of the foremost child psychologists
Starting point is 00:56:23 was the guest on the show. And he was basically saying exactly what I'm saying right now. I'm no expert, he is actually an expert. He's like, there's a lot of people out there who claim to know a whole lot about psychology of children and what we have found through, every study has been very inconclusive
Starting point is 00:56:46 and actually what our research tells us when you look at all the research is that in a large measure, kids are gonna be who they're going to be. Doesn't mean that parenting is not very important and that you put kids in one situation on one side of the earth and another kid in another situation,
Starting point is 00:57:05 that their circumstances are definitely gonna determine many things about their future and their outcome. But personality makeup and disposition is a big part of that is gonna be determined by genetics. And then there'll be some very formative events that can kind of send things in different ways. But as a parent, I mean first of all, I think there's a balance here because our wives
Starting point is 00:57:32 have been the ones who've read all the parenting books and have like obsessed about, you know, they've homeschooled the kids. Yeah, to their credit. They've invested all this time into, and I think there's been immeasurable impact. So I don't wanna diminish that. At the same time, we can take comfort in the fact
Starting point is 00:57:52 that it's like, okay, we do what we can, but in the midst of a real trying moment like this, like her finding out that she's gotta have this surgery, it's like that response that she's gonna have, that's kinda largely determined by who she just is. And I wanna make sure that in sharing the story that, and I'm just concerned that I don't wanna make sure I'm not leaving a lot of unanswered questions
Starting point is 00:58:18 that people would be concerned about. Yeah, right. Having not like calculated exactly how I wanted to talk about it or anything in terms of like when is this thing, we're talking like early May. So I mean it's, I guess I owe you an update after that point but yeah we feel very, I don't know, is there any unanswered, any?
Starting point is 00:58:47 No, I mean, I think you covered it, that she's, you know, the surgery is definitely the best option given her circumstances and it's gonna be a serious spinal fusion surgery with a pretty long recovery time. But there's lots of people who've had the surgery, lots of, you can go, there's lots of people with a pretty long recovery time but the, there's lots of people who've had the surgery, lots of, you can go, there's lots of people on YouTube,
Starting point is 00:59:10 lots of kids who've made YouTube videos about their journey through this kind of surgery. I came back, we were in the van, when I said that we were crying together and then we, I still had to come in. You know, it's like, I was, I think because of some sort of circumstance with us going to Sundance,
Starting point is 00:59:34 which then I wasn't gonna go to Sundance, and then Lily and Christy both told me to keep our plans to go to Sundance, even though it was, I didn't wanna go and I didn't wanna leave them at that point. They wanted me to go and that turned out to be a good situation for all of us for that to happen. Yeah, we had to come in and shoot Good Mythical Morning.
Starting point is 00:59:55 So we had to come in and we had to shoot Good Mythical Morning before we left for that. So then I'm driving in alone and I'm just thinking, I can't, I knew that we had to shoot and I was like, I can't talk about this because then we wouldn't be able to shoot the episode. Can't remember what the episode was at this point. And then it's like in the drive in,
Starting point is 01:00:22 that was kind of the conclusion, it's like I'm not gonna talk about this because I'm gonna get upset, we won't be able to shoot. We could talk about it later. Well which is an interesting, I think a lot of people, you know, we're not vloggers, right? I mean, we do unscripted video when we do Good Mythical Morning and I guess it can technically
Starting point is 01:00:43 be classified as a vlog, right, but we're not like family vloggers who are like, hey, we're letting you into our family and giving you this insight. We make a show, we make a show that has a very specific purpose and the primary purpose of Good Mythical Morning is to entertain the audience and to give people a break from the bull crap.
Starting point is 01:01:03 Yeah, I mean, everybody's got stuff. Everyone's learning the same type of information that Lily learned that morning. And watching our show is a reprieve. I want people when they get that bad news, they can count on our show to be a reprieve in those 15 minutes or whatever. And people may say, listen, no, but if you guys
Starting point is 01:01:26 are going through something super serious like that, just stop and tell us or make the show about that. It's like, no, we're not gonna do that. We're talking about it on Ear Biscuits. Yeah. That's another reason to do Ear Biscuits. We're gonna talk about things like this that we're not gonna bring into Good Mythical Morning
Starting point is 01:01:44 because that's not the purpose of that show. It's not designed to be this open book into our lives. It's designed to be, it's a particular type of entertainment. But ironically, I was trying to remember where I was going with that. But okay, so when I came in, I had enough breathing time on my drive in
Starting point is 01:02:08 that when I, I didn't make an accurate decision, but I walked into our office before we had a shoot and you were like, tell me about it. And then I'm not gonna be like, I can't talk about it right now. I just told you about it. And it was like, it actually made me feel better to just be able to talk through it.
Starting point is 01:02:24 Cause it's like okay, I'm such a verbal processor that I can, if I stay inside of my own head, it would just be like a fear cycle of this is horrible. So it was helpful for me to field your questions and then it's like you started looking on the internet immediately. But we pulled up YouTube videos,
Starting point is 01:02:48 the irony is we said we didn't talk about this stuff on YouTube but then we ended up finding a lot of people, mostly girls, I mean so many girls. Well it's actually much more common in females. Yeah who are like beginning to go through puberty at that age or whatever, who the type of scoliosis, I can't remember the name right now, but basically the name says they don't know what causes it.
Starting point is 01:03:12 That's in the name of it. But a lot of these girls have put their my scoliosis story and a lot of them had had the spinal fusion surgery and it kind of vlogged through the process or put their before and after pictures and just kinda talked about the process. I think when you go through it, it's the type of thing. And we've met other kids who are going through
Starting point is 01:03:36 and have gone through the surgery in person and Lily has talked to them, become friends with some of them. But the first exposure was YouTube videos that you and I watched that then I shared with Christy and Lily and that, it gave us a lot of comfort and confidence that there was a path. You know, we didn't know if it was our path yet
Starting point is 01:04:00 but we know that it was a valuable path that these people went on YouTube, shared their stories and we immediately benefited from it. I think that was my point, yeah. It all comes back to YouTube. It's all about YouTube. Yeah that's really the message here. They monetized their surgery just like
Starting point is 01:04:21 we're monetizing this. Without YouTube we wouldn't be here. Link would have no hope. That's not true. Not true, but to bring it back to, again, we didn't know what this show was gonna be about. This is what it has become. Man, we took a turn here.
Starting point is 01:04:42 We opened, we spread the cheeks. Spread the cheeks. For the proctologist for a good half hour. And then we opened our hearts, man. I mean this is an ear biscuit, this is what makes a complete ear biscuit. It's not always gonna be this, but to round out the whole point of the show,
Starting point is 01:04:58 I guess which became about us getting older, I think there's a few markers, right? There's a few markers. One is the being probed personally, but then there's this thing that I think I've experienced, I know you've experienced ever since I held my first child, Locke, in my hands. You mean Rocky?
Starting point is 01:05:20 Rocky. You're talking about Rocky. Yeah, I was like, oh crap. Oh no, I'm gonna worry a lot about this. You know what I'm saying? Like now, oh, I have to worry about this child because I'm so concerned about them and this is going to be difficult for me. You know, this, I might, like you kinda like feel your heart
Starting point is 01:05:39 like kinda change a little bit, grow a little bit and become a little bit more vulnerable. And I don't want to be one of those guys that's like you don't understand life if you don't have children. No, you have a lot more free time and can see a lot more movies if you don't have children. So there are a lot of reasons not to have children.
Starting point is 01:06:00 But movies and free time, just hobbies. That's what you mean? The good life. Okay. But when you do have a kid, it brings this sense of responsibility and this constant worrying about their welfare. So with something like Lily's going through,
Starting point is 01:06:21 it's just these kinds of things are gonna happen. These are the kind of things that you dread. These are the kind of things that you dread but they're the kind of things that you happen. And it's out of your control. Even though our first thing was how did we not notice this? Is it our fault that it got to this point? Right. And you know that's not the case
Starting point is 01:06:38 but that's still the first thing you think because you wanna think that you can have control over something, especially if you really love it. Yeah. You were trying to summarize. Well, you know, that is, that's where we're at right now. We're in a place where we're going to the doctor
Starting point is 01:07:02 for ourselves and for our children. That's where we're at. And we're gonna keep doing Ear Biscuits. We're gonna bring you a biscuit every week. And to give you a little preview of what season three might hold. Okay. It's gonna be a lot, I would say it's gonna be a lot looser and a lot different and may go a lot more places
Starting point is 01:07:25 and different places than previous seasons have gone. Yeah because we haven't planned it. I mean, I'm, I've, we haven't even, we've discussed, we haven't discussed what it will be, we've discussed what we don't want it to be. The same philosophy that I've been taking with my hair in 2017 and just letting it do what it wants to do is the same philosophy that we're taking with Ear Biscuits.
Starting point is 01:07:47 We're gonna let it be what it wants to be. Sometimes it's gonna be the two of us. Sometimes we're gonna bring somebody else. The previous two seasons, the majority of the episodes were us just sitting down and doing like a very deep interview with most often a YouTube personality. Right.
Starting point is 01:08:07 Not saying that's not gonna happen, but that's not gonna be the main thrust of the show. We're gonna talk to each other a lot, we're gonna talk to other people. We may be talking to you guys at some point, taking your questions. We don't know. We're gonna keep it open, we're going to keep it loose,
Starting point is 01:08:21 but keep it tight. And the one thing we're gonna do is we're gonna keep doing it. Not the sphincter. Like a sphincter. Yeah. We're gonna keep it loose and keep it tight. That's what we almost called this podcast, sphincter. But we didn't.
Starting point is 01:08:36 Yeah. And we don't. Thankfully we didn't but that might be the name of the first episode. But if we take this podcast to a Ugandan tent, it may be called Sphincter. Yeah. It may get a new name.
Starting point is 01:08:50 Who knows, I don't know how it translates to Ugandan. Thank you guys. Leave a review on iTunes, SoundCloud, or you don't leave YouTube reviews. You're gonna leave a comment or a like if you're watching this on YouTube. Also subscribe to the This is Mythical channel for more Ear Biscuits and other content throughout the week.
Starting point is 01:09:13 Thank you for being your mythical best. Yes.

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