Ear Biscuits with Rhett & Link - Neighbor and Roommate Horror Stories | Ear Biscuits Ep. 344

Episode Date: August 8, 2022

We’ve all had that neighbor who’s just way too loud or that roommate with strange tendencies. In this episode, Rhett and Link are going through voicemails and listening to your Bad Neighbor/Roommate horror stories. What happens when you confront the drunk guy peeing or your hallway? Or when you finally get tired of that dog pooping on your lawn? And how do you know for sure that your place isn’t haunted? Shop sike.la, drop in “EBMADEYOULOOK” at checkout, and enjoy 10% off your whole purchase! Want to hear your voice on Ear Biscuits? Call 1-888-EAR-POD1 and we might just play your call on an upcoming episode! Pre-order We’re Still Good, our new party game that laughs in the face of disaster here!: https://a.co/d/301Bd6C Go to casetify.com and use our code “15ear” to get 15% off your CASETiFY order! To learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices

This, this, this, this is Mythical. Your teen requested a ride, but this time, not from you. It's through their Uber Teen account. It's an Uber account that allows your teen to request a ride under your supervision with live trip tracking and highly rated drivers. Add your teen to your Uber account today. account today. Welcome to Ear Biscuits, the podcast where two lifelong friends talk about life for a long time.

I'm Link. And I'm Rhett. This week at the round table of dim lighting, we are hearing your voice is because you called and you answered the question, we want to hear your bad neighbor slash roommate horror stories. Give us a call and share your story at 1-888- EarPod One.

Yeah. You know, I've had some neighbors. I have neighbors. In the past, on this show, you have discussed some, you got into some thickness with your neighbors. You got into the deep end of strife. We will not recount that in detail, but yes, when I moved into my current home,

my neighbor that was really my only neighbor that we had contact with, like physical contact, we shared a fence with them. Your lands had contact. The way that my house is situated, they're really the only neighbor that you can really have a fence with and stuff. But anyway, yeah, we had a tree dispute, a bush dispute. There was a bunch of arguing that went back and forth.

Because you basically planted a palm tree on their land, but right next to your driveway. Yeah, after we talked about cutting down a bush that was theirs. Anyway, we had coffee and we straightened it out and now we give each other Christmas gifts. But what, so what was the, what is the long-term takeaway?

It's been so long since that. Well, what is it that, what I tell people- You buy them a bottle of wine. Well, what I tell people on the reg when they begin telling me their neighbor stories, is I say, you gotta nip that neighbor situation in the bud. Yep. Because you cannot abide in this way where you've got some ongoing dispute.

It's not, life is too short to be in an ongoing dispute with your neighbor. Even if what they are saying and doing, in my case, I thought that, is unreasonable. I was like, I don't care how unreasonable this is. I don't care who's right and who's wrong. In my mind, you were wrong, but keep going. Oh, you love to throw me under the bus.

I was not wrong by a long shot. But that was my takeaway. It was pretty simple. But the point being that it doesn't matter who's right or who's wrong. It really doesn't matter. I hear that. Reconciliation is the most important thing.

That's the right that you're looking for when you're in a neighbor situation. Now, somebody might be unwilling to compromise, but as I told you in the previous story, which has been years now, when I sat down at a coffee shop with my neighbor, he immediately began to weep. That's right.

Because he knew that he was in the wrong. Okay, yeah, I've forgotten that part. Yeah, so thanks a lot, Link. When the person's crying, that's, wow, you broke them. You didn't cry. No, I didn't. Ha! I had nothing to cry about.

Yeah, well, you talk about nipping in the bud, but to me, just to skip to like the final analysis here, if you have any opportunity to like build some positive rapport with a neighbor, do it. That's why when people move in next to you, you give them cookies, you welcome to the neighborhood, you give them a little welcome package or something, you introduce yourself.

Then you don't have to worry about when are we gonna meet? What circumstances are we gonna meet under? And is it gonna be when I have to confront them about something like these voicemails we got? Yeah, or like you're, oh, I'm doing some work on my house and they're a nosy neighbor and they're gonna come over to see if I've got the, I pulled the right permits and stuff. You know, that happens all the time in California.

Yeah, it happened with us. We never knew which neighbor it was. Yeah, you gotta have a good situation. But we ended up having to like, spend thousands of dollars doing stuff we didn't plan on doing. But you have a good situation in your neighborhood. I do.

My cul-de-sac, right there all around the end, we all know each other and party together a couple of times a year and we've got- That's sometimes a little too hard, is what I heard. Yep, Christy's on a text thread with some of those people. I'm not on that text thread.

That's where I draw the line. You can get hammered in a cul-de-sac though. Oh man, you know what I'm saying? Cause it's like- It's only one way out. Yeah, right. It's like, it's really hard to get hurt. Like it's really hard to get run over in a cul-de-sac though. Oh man, yeah. You know what I'm saying? It's only one way out. Yeah, right. It's like, it's really hard to get hurt. Like it's really hard to get run over in a cul-de-sac. Yeah, that's right.

You know, cause it's just like, it's just, well, it's just the end of the road. So you don't get hammered by a car. I'm just saying. You can get hammered. A cul-de-sac, a place where a road terminates surrounded by homes, it just feels like a place that you can just lose yourself. You know? Oh, yeah.

Let it all hang out. We did, man. Yeah, it's like- You can't do that on a thoroughfare, you know what I'm saying? Nope. You gotta do that in a place where, listen, you saw this, and if you're gonna tell somebody about it, we're not gonna let you leave,

and we can all keep you here because it's just one way out. Yeah. It's about barricading. If you live on a highway, you can't get away with anything. And then the cul-de-sac, then it extends, it curves around and then extends to the main road. So like one of the things we discussed at our last party was how this was not me talking either.

Seems like something I would say in a group to see how everybody reacted. But one of my neighbors said, "'Yeah, we're in the balls of the street.' "'And then you kind of drive down the shaft of the street "'to get out to the main thoroughfare.'" Those are pretty little balls if you go those proportions.

Well, it's just the cul-de-sac is a nut sack. I understand the analogy. I'm just saying that if I were to take an overhead view of your street, knowing about how long it is. The balls are proportionately small. It's very cold in that cul-de-sac, if you know what I'm saying. Cold sack. It's very cold.

That's why it's called that! A cold sack. Oh! It's very shriveled at the end. Figured it out. Yeah, I got a good relationship. You live at the sh it's called that! A cold sack. Oh! It's very shriveled at the end. Figured it out, yeah I got a good relationship. You live at the shriveled small end of the sack. With my neighbors. There was this whole thing about my window from my shower

giving me a vantage point to my neighbors, which then I talked to them about it, and it's like, I wanna make a video about this. They were super cool about it, you know? They've since put up a fence that then kind of makes it a little more difficult for me to see them drive to work while I'm showering. They're super cool about it,

and since then they have put up a barricade. Yeah. On the other side, we got new neighbors, and they're below me, and there's that wall. This is the guy who threw you something off his grill. No, no, no. That's the guy, that's my backside neighbor. I'm talking about my other side neighbor.

My backside neighbor, I saw him on a walk with the dogs a week ago and I was like, hey, I'm Link. I'm your neighbor up there. And he was like, oh yeah. And he made the motion. He's like, I threw it. Of throwing the meat. What did he throw, what kind of meat?

Like a hero meat on a shish kebab. He took it off the- A morsel. A morsel, he took like a handful- I threw the morsel! Yeah, so he made the throwing motion. This is the morsel motion. He was like, oh yeah! He was like, next time, come on down.

Oh, he was baiting you. Yeah, and I remember his name now. That's the other thing. Write down your neighbor's names. Like I put in my phone person's name and then I put neighbor. So then when I can't remember my neighbor's name, I just searched my address book for neighbor.

And it's like all my neighbors from all the years come up. You gotta make a good, you gotta start on a positive foot because inevitably there will be conflict as we see. And with my new side neighbor, there's that center block wall. Walls are trouble, who owns them? I own the wall.

But how do you really know? Because I do. And then I look over the wall. But they probably think the same thing. And they've done all types of landscaping once they moved in, including planting trees that line the wall on their side so they don't have to look at the backside of my wall.

They can look at the trees they planted. It's a center block. Christy wasn't happy with what they planted. She said, I wish they would have asked me what type of thing to plant. I could have helped them come up with something better. And I'm like, well, the only thing I'm worried about is the fact that these trees that they planted

are gonna keep going up and up and up. And when I sit at my dining room table and I look out that side window, I can see a little bit of the mountains. And I don't wanna see a point blank range tree. Is it like those very typical, like California, like they're gonna get really tall and they look like they might be evergreen,

bushes that just keep going straight up. It's a smaller, I would call it, it's a tree, but it kinda has a- A bush-like quality? A bush-like quality. But I could already tell when they first planted it. I was like, there's a few that are higher and I'm sitting there looking out my window and my vantage point of the mountain is being threatened

from a seated height by these freshly planted tree things. So I say- If you need somebody to come over and accidentally be like wielding, what is it, a scythe? A scythe, yeah. Oh, the tall guy came over. The Sith. The Sith Lord.

I could come over, this is it, this is the plan. Halloween night, I make a great grim reaper, I bring my scythe, or scythe? Scythe. You know what I'm talking about. And I'm just having a grand old time. It's a cul-de-sac, so I get a little hammered and I start swinging that thing around

and I just cut the tops of their bushes off. And I do it every Halloween. Oh, uh- It's a way to keep it controlled. I appreciate the offer, but I've already taken care of it. Oh, snap! Yeah, it was under the cover of darkness. Because it's on my side, there's the wall, which is like four and a half feet tall,

maybe even five feet tall. And then there's like another foot of tree that's now on top of that. And it's right there at my eye level, my hand level. When I'm like, if I say, if I had clippers in my hand, like some sort of landscaping shears, let's just say I did, let's just say it was dark. Oh gosh. And let's just say from my side,

it's just right there conveniently, snip, snip, snip, snip, snip. From their side, the top of those trees is probably seven or eight feet. Oh really? Because their plot is lower than mine. So I tried to snip off every single one in a very-

Natural. Uneven natural pattern. This is just nature taking its course. So it doesn't just look like I just went across the top, like epic rap battle of manliness opening scene. So I got it, but I did that like six weeks ago. I already have to do it again. Under the cover of darkness.

You wanna come over? We could get in ninja suits. You are trimming your neighbor's bushes at night. Just to keep them at the right level. I mean, they can't get any taller. Well, you might be, in some way, you might be creating bonsai. You know what I'm saying?

Like if you keep a tree from growing, I think other things start happening. No, that's not gonna happen. Well, I thought you were gonna say, maybe you're creating, maybe you're doing your neighbor a favor, which is how I am looking at it. I can conveniently trim their tree

without them even having to pay some money. Do you hold, do you grasp the bush and trim it so you keep the trimmings on your side? Hell yeah. Who do you think I am? So all the evidence is on your side. Oh yeah. Yeah, yeah. And I have, and you know what?

If they happen to get curious and notice, and like maybe I see them in passing, and they're asking about like, do you- These trees are supposed to be 16 feet tall now. If they ask me about it, I'm gonna say, I don't know. That would be a lie, but I will say that. I'm going to lie. And I'm gonna say, I don't know, but I haven't noticed.

Maybe my landscapers are trimming that just as a courtesy to you. You could say I'm a sleep trimmer. So I don't remember doing it, but I might do it. But I only trim bushes while sleepwalking. Including my own. I'm not, what I'm doing isn't right and I'm not proud of it.

I don't know. But I'm not. It is against the law probably, technically. I'm not. I don't think you can touch your neighbor's bush without consent. Prepared to do anything else. Like I'm not prepared to do anything else. Like I'm not prepared to do the right thing,

which I don't even wanna know what that is, unless you wanna tell me. I mean, what's the right thing to do here? Talk to my neighbor, Mr. F? I mean, we do know each other, we're on a first name basis. We met at a cul-de-sac party right when they moved in. But they really keep to themselves.

Okay, have you looked at the bushes from their perspective? No, you want me to sneak into their backyard and look back up? So it's the backyard? It's the backyard. Okay, okay, okay. I don't think they would mind,

but I don't wanna take the risk to ask. Okay, this is what I would do if I were you. I would get a selfie stick, okay? Approximately 10 feet long. You got to do this when they're at daytime, when they're not there, and you put your phone on wide angle and you stick it phone on wide angle

and you stick it into their backyard and get a look at what their perspective of their bushes would be. If you're not gonna be helpful. Oh, I'm not kidding. You're wasting my time. I'm not kidding, that's step one. So you actually can appreciate like, oh, yeah, totally fine.

If you get down there and you're like, oh no, I'm ruining this from their perspective, which I don't think is the case. I just think you gotta confirm because then I do think you go to them. And the fact that you've been trimming already, I'm just saying, if you wanna do the right thing, I'm not saying this is what you should do.

I'm saying if you wanna do the right thing, I think the thing that I would do is I would keep trimming the bushes at night and just, it would probably never become a thing. Yeah. Which is probably what you're gonna do. But if you wanna do the right thing. I'm a night bush boy.

I would go and I would say, hey, I wanted to talk about your bushes. You know, I feel like if we just let them keep growing, it's really gonna obstruct our view. But my assumption is that you guys don't really care that they need to get taller than the seven or eight feet that they are and kind of covering. I'm sure that's just kind of beautifying your experience

in the back and you're not looking at a cinder block wall. I didn't wanna come over without asking, so I did stick a selfie stick over the fence and I know what it looks like from your perspective. In my mind, it looks great. Here's the video. I think the chances, the only risk is that they want it to grow taller

because from their vantage point, they want to block something that is currently being seen. You won't know what that is unless you do the selfie stick method. You need to, the key to winning an argument is knowing everything that the opponent is thinking. Everything about their perspective. You basically need to steel man their argument,

not straw man. I know what I'm gonna do. Bush man. I know what I'm gonna do. I'm gonna pick a time when they're not there. I'm going to throw a ball into their pool. Oh. In the backyard.

I'm gonna go, I'm gonna knock on the door. When nobody comes to the door, I'm gonna go into the backyard of their house and I'm gonna retrieve my ball. Okay. And while I do, I will have the perfect vantage point,

even if they have cameras. I was just getting my ball. I was just getting my ball and looking at your head. Yeah, we saw you on camera aiming for our pool. Because the bushes are too short and looking at your head. Yeah, we saw you on camera aiming for our bull. Because the bushes are too short and they didn't block. Right. Didn't block it.

They're gonna get you on camera. That's the weakness in this plan. Now I'm gonna get Lando to do it. Ah, yes. I'm gonna bring a child into this. Yeah, our child is strange. He just, he loves to throw balls out of boundaries. Do you wanna come over and do it?

No, you're too tall. And then I'm gonna look and I'll know. I'll dress as the grim reaper. If there's something to block. And then if there's nothing to block vertically, then I'm just gonna keep night trimming. What about your pool equipment? Do you think that they're blocking your pool equipment?

Yeah, but that's not an issue. It's lower. Because that's below the wall. It's lower. But yeah, so I'm just gonna do them what I think is a favor. And if I get back into a corner and I have to admit to it, I'm just gonna, you know, I'm gonna work my link charm. You know, I've never been punched in the face.

Well, I just- And I've deserved it a lot. One small thing, a way I kind of relate to this is- Let me know. Hashtag Ear Biscuits, by the way. Is I, you know, we've kind of like- Or 188 EarPod 1. Yes, we know. Please let me know.

I've kind of landscaped a little area there next to my home. Yes, you have. And I have entered, I have crossed the boundary. It's not your land. I'm 10 feet into the next yard, but it's an empty lot and we're just like, nobody lives there. That's fine. You did the right thing. But one of the things, but it's an empty lot. And we're just like, eh, nobody lives there. That's fine.

You did the right thing. But one of the things, and there's also like, after a while it becomes my land. I don't know how many years it is in California, but after a while I get it, because I've staked my claim. Eminent domain, that's not- But we have a little bench that we've set up there

to kind of like, I'll go out there and, have you sat on my bench? I haven't. Yeah, we have a little bench over there now that you can watch the sunset, you can look over the whole neighborhood, it's wonderful. I have a glass of wine, haven't done that yet, but I've definitely thought about it.

But there- Keep a box of wine underneath the bench? There's one tree. Oh, yep. About two, like two roads away. That's a pretty large tree, it's pretty tall. You know what, say no more. Yes, I will help you chop down this tree.

No, no, this is my plan. So I think that it may be maxed out. I have no morality when it comes to landscaping other people's homes. Well, trees don't have souls. I think that this tree might be done growing, but I'm keeping a really close eye on it. And if it isn't done growing, but I'm keeping a really close eye on it.

And if it isn't done growing, it could obstruct my view of the sunset. Here's my plan, because I'm sure these people are proud of this tree. I'm gonna get into archery, okay? And I'm going to poison the tip of a arrow with some sort of like a beetle colony. Oh no, Rhett, that's horrible.

I'm gonna put like a egg sack of a tree killing beetle. And I'm gonna aim at the trunk from a distance, in the cover of night. Think about all the damage you're gonna do when you miss. No, no, first of all, Again and again, you're gonna be a beetle infestation. I'm gonna train for months. I get one shot at this.

At the cover of night, I will be dressed as the Grim Reaper and I will have on night vision goggles and I'll be sitting on my bench and I will aim at the trunk of that tree. It'll be probably a crossbow because you can aim a little bit better at a crossbow with a beetle colony on the tip. Goes right into, they'll never know what hit the tree

because it'll also be a- A disintegrating arrow? A disintegrating arrow. Right, don't forget that. An arrow that biodegrades. Quickly, very quickly. No, it's- On impact. It's a wooden arrow that the beetles eat once they're,

it's the first thing the larva eat when they come to life. Just make the arrow look like a tree limb. Even better idea. Right. It'll be so high up, it's gonna be like 60 feet in the air. Not a good idea. We don't know what happened to that tree,

but when it finally fell, there was an arrow in it. What's the problem part of the tree though? The top. Well, here's what I think you should do. It's not a problem yet, but it might be one day. Yeah. What I think you should do is you should approach those people and say,

I would like, you explain your situation and you say, I would like to pay for your trees to be trimmed. That's something that we all have to do. I would like to cover the cost of that whenever you do it next time. And all I'm asking is that they also top off the tree, which is something that they do. It helps them keep the trees healthy. A lot of trees in our area, if you'll notice,

especially like those pines. They got bad tops. They top them off. So they have a blunt top because when you're there, when it's in your yard, you never, that has no impact on you. Right, you can't see the top. But I think it helps the health of the tree.

I'm no arborist, but it really helps your view. And there's places like that that I've thought of. I thought about going all the way through, like miles from my house, and like tracking down the owners of these trees and just like, just throwing money at them so I can top their trees. Well, just cut the tops right off.

We did cut down a few trees in that lot that we don't own. Not because of the view. That's called brush clearance. That's a favor. You get a favor. It was because we had been told by somebody who knew what they were talking about. It wasn't like an arborist,

but he was like someone who had a good friend who was one. Okay. And he was like, those trees are- Friend of the trees. Those trees are about to fall into the neighbor's yard. And also it's a fire hazard. And so we were like, yeah. And we paid for it out of our pocket.

And we tried to contact the owner of the lot and he didn't get back to us. And so we just cut him down. All right. Yeah, that's another dilemma. Let us know. I like the fact that we have this voicemail. And of course, now, that's another dilemma. Let us know. I like the fact that we have this voicemail. And of course, now we're gonna listen to your voicemails

after we talk about our new freaking party game. Yeah. We're Still Good is available at Walmarts near you and at walmart.com. You know the phrase, we're still good from our show, Good Mythical Morning. Now, you know, we're really into games, especially me. I have a game night that, I actually haven't reinstituted it yet, but-

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It's a party game that's based on cards and tokens. And it's also just based on taking a horrible scenario, which is actually just ridiculously hilarious, but a negative scenario and putting a positive spin on it, and then picking the best positive spin, there's some cards, and it's not completely just a creative exercise. You get to fill in the blank.

It's incredibly fun. We've played it a couple of times. There's two stages to each round, which makes it more fun and, I think, original. You can play in teams, you can play as an individual. You take a scenario that has a blank and then everybody submits one of the cards that they have acquired randomly

and then the judge in each round decides to fill in the blank and make like this crazy negative situation. Right. And then everybody for the second phase of this round then has to put a positive spin on this crazy scenario once the blank has been filled in. And the judge picks the person that, picks the one they like the best.

It could be like- It's fine. The card could be, you just found out that in the middle of the night, your neighbor is blank. And you might get a card that says, shooting a beetle infested arrow at your biggest tree. You're like, we're still good because I hated that tree. Because I love beetles, my favorite band. You see, the beetles are my favorite band.

That would be a funny, that's an example of one that might be chosen. So we're still good. Just holding the box, I wish I had it right now, is just satisfying. You can imagine what it feels like. It's just satisfying to say there's a physical game that we have developed that you can own

and increase your mythicality. And if you get drunk in a cul-de-sac on a regular basis, it'd be real fun in a cul-de-sac while hammered. drunk in a cul-de-sac on a regular basis. It'd be real fun in a cul-de-sac while hammered. Shop Best Buy's Ultimate Smartphone Sale today. Get a Best Buy gift card

of up to $200 on select phone activations with major carriers. Visit your nearest Best Buy store today. Terms and conditions apply. Let's listen to a voicemail. Yes. Hi there, guys. I have a very interesting, not roommate, but a neighbor story. So I live in an apartment, college apartment. I'll try to make this pretty quick. Heard a loud noise outside. Looked outside.

Someone smashed one of our lights. The girl across from me was confused. We were both confused to go back inside. My roommates then come home, and they're like, hey, someone's peeing in the goddamn hallway. So they're taking a piss in the hallway. I finally am like, okay, this is enough. I come out there, and I'm like, hey, man, what are you doing? Immediately whips around at me.

Lacey pulls his pants up beforehand, throws his shirt off as quick as he can, and pretty dang quickly is in my face ready to fight me. Definitely much taller than me, much more built than me. And I'm like, oh, man, I didn't want to fight you. I just don't want you taking a pee in the hallway that I live in for obvious reasons. So and so it happened. A bunch of people come out and dissolve the issue. And, you know, it ended up working out in the end. I didn't. Reasonable. For obvious reasons. So and so it happened. A bunch of people come out and dissolve the issue. And, you know, it ended up working out in the end.

I didn't have to fight Jay Buckley. But pretty dang interesting story. And, yeah, they were very interesting to live with for the rest of that time. Thank you, guys. Yeah, because after that, that big guy with his shirt on or off, you never know what you're going to get,

he's still around. Obviously he was under the influence of something. If you're gonna pee in a hallway, it can't be your own. It can't be your own. I mean, so just to get that out of the way, there are circumstances in which pissing in a hallway is probably permitted. You know what I'm saying?

I don't know. I'm just saying, let's just say- Yeah, tell me one. This scenario- I'm waiting. Okay, might be that you're being held up. Maybe you're being held up at gunpoint. Okay, you're being held hostage in a hallway and you have to pee after a while.

You never know how, no, I'm saying that like a lot of people, if you point a gun at them, they pee. You know what I'm saying? I've never had that happen to me. I don't know what I would do. Being stuck in an elevator, you're gonna pee in the corner, even though you know you gotta stay there.

And if you can get your tally-whacker out, the split of the elevator, it'd be better to pee into the hall. This is a perfect situation. Then it starts going and that thing clamps down. No, you get everyone else in the elevator, because assuming you're not alone, to hold it open just big enough for your tallywhacker

to go out into the hall and pee, because that's what they want. They don't want you peeing inside the elevator that we're all stuck in. No, pee out into the hallway. That would be acceptable. Who first, who transferred the terminology of tallywhacker to you?

Because that, I got it from you when we were like kids. That's what my parents called it when they were growing up. Tallywhacker. Yeah, tallywhacker. I'm saying, when they were growing up. Tallywhacker. Yeah, tallywhacker. I'm saying, when they were growing up, they didn't call it a tallywhacker for me. We called it ding dong. Okay, yeah.

It was always very confusing because I always thought somebody was at the door. But tallywhacker is what they called it in South Georgia way back in the day. And you know what I called it from when I stayed at preschool, pre-preschool, as early as I can remember. When you say it, I'm gonna remember it.

A pitot. Yeah, that, okay, why? Somebody referred to it as that and it kind of makes sense, you know? You're a preschooler. You don't have a third leg. You just have a 11th toe. That you pee out of.

That you pee out of. But it sounds so much like something else. Pee toe. I mean, it's so close to. I didn't know that. I mean, P-E-E-E-T-O-E. I mean, it's like, if you know, you know, but if you don't, yeah, you might think it's pedo.

I understand that now, but I didn't then. Thank God I didn't know what that was. But back to the situation, and this is ridiculous. First of all, when you approach somebody doing this, that's a delicate situation, because it's always like, hey, buddy. Like, hey. It's like you gotta say something.

Approach with a bucket and just start catching it. Because I think there's some people are like, but what the hell dude? He took his shirt off immediately. I mean, that is what you're afraid is gonna happen. He was an angry drunk. And why is he taking it? You don't wanna get blood on his shirt?

An angry sloppy drunk. That's an intimidation move there. It's like, not only am I gonna bow up and fight you, I'm gonna take my shirt off first because all of the blood spatter from me just whooping you is not gonna get on my shirt, Jack. Yeah, I mean, that was rough. I'm glad it was diffused.

But yeah, you never know what people are gonna do and you never know how they're gonna respond if they're peeing in their own hallway. Just chalk it up to having to clean it up later. I peed in a trash can one time. Sleepwalking. I was barely awake, yeah. Okay.

And I was also a child. So I had some roommates in my first apartment ever that I had known from my previous year of college. I met them on campus and we were good buddies we had hung out outside of class plenty of times these seemed like normal well adjusted people okay they ended up believing that our first floor apartment was haunted because they heard footsteps. Okay, it's a college apartment complex, and there were plenty of people up walking around.

They might have been ghosted. During the middle of the night. They sound different, right? Partying or otherwise. And this escalated to a point where I came home after a weekend away with my now husband and they had drawn charcoal pentagrams on the walls and the doors. Um,

because they quote felt a presence unquote. Well, so that was, yeah, that was my first roommate experience and my last. No more roommates after that. See, you kinda gotta approach this

with a little bit of sensitivity because this is, I mean, this could be a religious slash spiritual exercise. This could be a personal belief set. And I'm not ready to say that ghosts don't exist and I'm not ready to say what pentagrams will do to them. But I do understand that if it was me, I would be like, I don't consider pentagrams to be like a part of my feng shui, you know what I'm saying?

You could go like the decorative route. Yeah, it's like, let's go, we need to go in a different non pentagram direction with the motif here. How about let's just not do charcoal on the walls. Charcoal is semi-permanent or is totally washable. If it was Sharpie. I think it depends on if we're talking about an eggshell or a flat paint.

Well, I got another podcast for that. Which I listen to your dad talk all... My wife and I were listening to Dispatches from Myrtle Beach and he was talking about eggshell and satin, you know, and gloss. Yeah. I was completely on Charles' side about this, about how you want to use an eggshell in a bathroom

and not a gloss and Jessie, she's a designer, she has these opinions and she was like, oh, I like to do, I like a gloss in the bathroom. I was like, ah, too shiny. Shows too many imperfections. And that eggshell, you gotta- You're not gonna be happy with it. Yeah, so anyway, I do defer to your dad on that.

She's got beef with my dad? They're gonna have to face off. No, she didn't completely disagree with him, but she's just done, in a well-constructed bathroom where the sheetrock work was high quality, sometimes that extra sheen gives a, you know, makes you feel a little more alive. Well, my dad has gotten good over the years

of navigating women in his life who disagree with him. Yeah, yeah, that's his job. He learns to be quiet. And I'm not talking about clients, I'm just talking about just relationships. That's what he told me. Learn to keep his mouth shut. So he'd probably just let her win.

Most things resolve themselves without saying anything. That's what he's telling me. Yeah, this is a tough one because, yeah, I mean, first of all, depending on your religious disposition, it seems like a pentagram might invite, if you're already believing in the supernatural of some sort- Not ghosts, but demons. Yeah, with the pentagram,

you may be inviting something more sinister into the situation. I don't know enough about it to tell you one way or another, but it seems like that's maybe, it's like, hey, you know, how about just do the cross on the, let's do a cross on the door. Right, if there's a clash of personal beliefs here, then you gotta figure out a way to work it through.

Yeah, you gotta figure out like, what is the overall religious disposition of the house? We gotta be on the same team here in order to deal with these spirits in the way that we think is gonna be effective. I don't know, that kind of reminds me of the, I don't remember many of the details, but Kiko told us about the story of the haunted.

Yeah, but they were, everyone in the house was kind of undeniably on the same page. I mean, they- Kind of in denial about it. No, they all were like, yes, something's going on here. There was agreement actually, is what I remember.

Yeah. I think you have to join, if you want everyone to be dealing with these spirits in the same way, you have to join a coven where you all think the same thing. Or a Bible study. I think that's- You know, like, you gotta pick your side and then you-

When you're talking about a roommate that's like, how do you, like, she was trying to ascertain like, is this person, do I vibe with this person? I mean, the way she put it was like, is this person like normal? She didn't say the word normal. I can't remember what she said, but you know what I'm saying.

So if you wanna like get at somebody's like spiritual beliefs, I mean, you can clash about anything in a roommate situation, but how do you ask that? Because that's not a fair question when you're trying to find a roommate, or is it? Well, I think- Isn't that illegal? To me, it probably is,

but to me, the specific situation is, we believe there are spirits in this home and we are taking the following actions, which it's not like, hey, inside my room, I've got some sage and some other stuff that I'm doing. Or even going around the- Communal areas. Well, even taking sage around the perimeter of your home,

that's not necessarily offensive, but the pentagram, it's a decorative, like you said, it's a decorative decision that says something about this house. And if that's not something that everybody agrees with, ah, we have a problem. Yeah. And maybe you gotta consult the spirits too.

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express visit amex.ca slash ymx benefits vary by card terms apply i live on a ground floor apartment and above me there is a family with two very, very rowdy children. I work from home, which is great. I love it. But it is extremely hard when there are two three- to five-year-olds running back and forth legitimately all day from about 5 a.m. to 11 to 12 at night. What? They are running back and forth all the time. And it is distracting. I've gotten used to it.

But when guests come over, they're like, how do you sleep? How do you exist in this? And it's capitalism, baby. But I was playing video games one night on the switch. I was up. I was moving. And they were playing outside the apartment. And again, I live on the ground floor.

And they started banging on the window going, are you dancing? And it ruined my life. So I now hate children and I never want to live in a ground floor apartment again. Are you dancing? Are you dancing? Because that's what we do from 5 a.m. until 11 p.m. Yeah, give these kids a better bedtime. That's tough, man, when you've got people above you.

I mean, when we had our apartment in college, that was the last time I lived with people above me. And it's, boy, that, you really gotta navigate that. You had somebody above you in the apartment that we moved into when we first moved to California. You weren't on the top floor. That's true. I was on the top floor. That's right, out here.

I didn't have anybody above me. I don't recall it being a problem. That was- I think it was a thicker- It all depends on the nature of the- In LA, a lot of the apartment complexes have concrete floors in between. Yeah, they do. I don't know, maybe just because of like earthquakes

and stuff, but it really doesn't end up being a big deal. Don't say the E word. Oh, you think I'm gonna incite one? Yeah. But- We're gonna have to put up, what's the pentagram equivalent for keeping earthquakes away? I don't believe there is one.

If there was, Christy would have found it. They can shoot some like foam into the ground or something. Shock absorbers. Yeah, this is so tough because I think- People are protective of their kids. You know if you're trying to talk to them about their kids, it's like, well, they're just a bundle of joy. Well, it's very difficult because in certain situations,

it doesn't necessarily mean that they're doing anything that is abnormally loud if the ceilings, if the floors are really thin. Kids being kids, man. But now, if these kids- The core problem is just, it's just kids. If the kids are, maybe they're training for something. I don't know, maybe they're gonna be in like the Junior Olympics.

There's nothing you can do. And like, if a kid asked me if I'm dancing, you can't let that ruin your life. You just can't. You can't let anything a kid does, oh man. I don't, I honestly don't know what the solution is. Yeah, we feel your pain. Maybe we just need to acknowledge how difficult this is.

It's like, I hear that this is tough for you. Thank you for sharing. I'm sorry that you have to put up with this. I think I have a solution. And I'm not saying this is a foolproof solution. But I honestly believe- Which basically means it's not. No, well, foolproof means that they would be quiet

all of a sudden. Foolproof would be, we gotta get rid of these kids. And that's not what I'm advocating. If you have not yet had a conversation with the people above you about the nature of the noise, you need to have a conversation. I'm not gonna dictate what you should say, but simply having a conversation adds a new factor

into the situation from the parent's perspective, which then is translated to the children's perspective. And that is, oh, when you guys run around, the woman who lives below us hears it. And I can imagine that that's annoying. So now I'm thinking about that. But if this family is up there just operating in complete ignorance about the amount of noise

they're making, there's no buffer at all. But if you know there's somebody below you, you'd be like, oh, okay, you guys are running around at 5 a.m., hey guys, remember, there's people below us. It's not gonna change everything, but it's gonna take the edge off. Yeah, and I- You gotta have that conversation. I think if there's

some sort of, well, you take a gift basket up there, and it's got a toy for each kid. And a big pair of really padded slippers for everyone. Yeah. Can you wear these big feet foot, big feet shoes? Definitely a very quiet toys for the kids cause you don't want to shoot yourself in the foot

by giving them something loud. But then you're like, it's a gesture of positivity. It's, what's it called? When you give something nice to somebody. I would have known before I got COVID brain. This is the kind of thing I can't remember anymore. When somebody, a peace offering. You can't hide, yes. You can't hide behind that the kind of thing I can't remember anymore. Peace offering. You can't hide, yes.

You can't hide behind that the rest of your life, man. You're just getting stupid. And that never happened to me before. I'm telling you. Okay. Peace offering. It's there, it just takes longer to get to. I'm rebuilding neural networks.

And then you just give them a, you just have a little conversation. It's like, but you have to say, you're not asking for them to be quiet at all times. You're just asking for like, I don't know, is it like, what's the, you work at home, it's really difficult. If you figure out something that you feel like

is a reasonable yet open-ended request for an awareness and a little sensitivity. Yeah. It's tough, tough man it is tough hi my name is tanisha i live in atlanta um i've been listening to ear biscuits and watching gmm since you guys first started i have followed you guys across the u.S. I love you guys. I love everybody. You guys are awesome. But responding to the bad neighbor thing, my bad neighbor experience, I live in some apartments, and I had a neighbor who insisted on having adult fun times very loudly in their living room.

That's fine, except our front doors are French doors, and they didn't have curtains. So when I would walk to my apartment, and I had to pass their apartment to get to my apartment, I would get a show every evening. Even though I didn't want that show, I still got that show. So one day I happened to mention to them. Every evening, still got that show so one day i happened to mention every evening they got the show every freaking evening well like and not just through a window but through like two french

doors full of glass man to them hey i got these really awesome curtains on my front door, and they were very offended that I mentioned that to them and told them, kind of hinted at, we don't want to see your show every night. And it was like for two hours, which is amazing, but it's an absolute no. So anyway, that's my story. They eventually moved out after a month. A lot of people complained. But that's my story. They eventually moved out after a month of a lot of people complaining. But that's my story. Love you guys. Okay, before we get into the solution

of what you do about this, I just gotta figure this situation out. We got a couple, essentially they're exhibitionists, right? Because you know that somebody's watching you. You know that you can be seen. This isn't something that you accident, oh, we didn't realize that we were in the living room.

Every night for two hours. So we're doing this on purpose. Two hours. Now, first of all, two hours every night? You know what, they need to get a television. What kind of medication is this guy on? They need to get like a laptop or something. You need to start streaming things.

It's like- Well, that's my theory is that they were. So I think- Oh, oh, they were streaming things. I think this may have been a cam couple. And I think that the living room provided the best lighting and scenery, which is an important choice when you're making independent porn.

But curtains, she mentioned curtains. But when you are making porn and you're good at it and you know it, and any dude who can go for two hours. Not considerate. I'm just saying. You're not getting paid by your neighbors. I know, but I'm just saying it's part of the spirit of it. If you're broadcasting it to thousands of people at once,

well, what does a couple more neighbors matter? I'm not saying I agree with it. I'm just trying to get inside the head space. Yeah. I'm just saying there's something, these are professional sex havers. Especially because multiple people complained to the point

where they moved out. It wasn't just her. If you're having sex for two hours every single night, this is your job. You know what I'm saying? I don't think that- It definitely makes me feel better to come to that conclusion. I don't think that you can have a job

and then have sex for two hours every night. You'd be too bowlegged. I mean, you could be a cowboy. Depends on which one you are, I guess. So first of all, I do think that's my assessment of the situation is that there was a webcam that you couldn't see. So really the thing that you could have gotten them on

is the technicality about operating a business in the apartment complex. That would have been the proper way to account for that. Man. Now, I gotta say, I've stayed in a couple of apartments or a couple of hotels in Manhattan where you get that situation where you are now looking into like an apartment complex or a hotel across the way.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. And you get stark and some people close the curtains and some people don't. And there's been a number of times when not out of intention, but just out of happenstance, oh, there's a couple that looks like they might be about to make love. And I've never seen anybody make love.

I think there was one time I did see somebody making love through one of those like sheer curtains where you could sort of see bodies moving, but it couldn't make out any details. Are you getting it confused with the time that you and I both are like, what are they doing over there? And then we figured out they were playing cornhole

inside their apartment. Well, that was one of them, but that was just one instance, which I'm just raising a question. Which that was wild. I'm raising a question right now. And I have a feeling that we probably have a difference of opinion on this.

No, I would look. You would? But I wouldn't talk about it on this podcast. But like, is it- I don't wanna be judged for that. I'm just asking the question. If a couple is making love and you can see it through a window

and it's obvious that they, it's not like, oh, we forgot to close the window, you know? Well, I don't know how it would be obvious, but I don't, I'm just being honest. It's never happened, but maybe I would look a little bit. Well, there was one time that Jessie and I were staying in a hotel and my wife, my wife likes to draw the curtains.

Yeah, okay. I don't. And we were in New York, I think, at some place where there was another building across the way and I was like, let's just leave them open and give people a show. I legitimately said that. You said give them a show? Give them a show.

You saw them? No, I was like, if you start screwing in a window, not in the window, but like, you start screwing in a bedroom that has a window and- Don't do it up against the window because you don't want that thing to fall out. I'm just saying there was a part of me that I was like, I feel like maybe- A hell of a way to go though saying there was a part of me that I was like, I feel like maybe-

A hell of a way to go though. There's a part of me that's a little exhibitionist because I thought to myself, it would be fun to, it's fun to watch people have sex. There's a reason that people watch porn. It's fun to watch people having sex. And if you can be a part of that in a non-professional way, but just sort of like, oh, we forgot to close the window, just every once in a while, I think that's a beautiful part of that in a non-professional way, but just sort of like, oh, we forgot to close the window.

Just every once in a while. I think that's a beautiful part of humanity. But this situation that this woman was dealing with is different. But you can't force it on people. Like to me, it comes down to like, this window needs to stay open because I paid for this room with a view.

And I like to look at views while I'm sorting the mail. I do, it's part of it. Like I don't look away from Christy the whole time, but I might glance away and say, wow. I mean, I like making love in places where I can- A city that never sleeps. I can see a view while it's happening. Like there's, you know, it's like, it's fun.

That's fun. Understood. That's part of it. Understood. I've never, and so that's my main motivation. And it's so far away from other people that like- They can't tell who you are. You're not imposing. They can look away. They can draw their curtains.

They can- What are the legal ramifications though? But it's so far away that you're small. Are there legal ramifications? I mean, could you, what about children watching? Well, that's what I'm asking. Is that, again. I don't want no children watching.

Is there a law. For the record. Is there a law against open window screwing? That's a good question. Like, is it okay? Like what if you did it right up against the window screwing? That's a good question. Like, is it okay? Like what if you did it right up against the window? What if you had your butt cheeks spread right up against the window? Is that wrong?

I mean, I'm not asking if it's wrong. Is it illegal? Is there a point in which it becomes illegal? Because if you go to a park and pull your tally wacker out, you'll get arrested for indecent exposure. But if you're in the privacy of your own home and you pull your tally whacker out and people can see you across the way.

Is it a crime to have sex with the windows open? Hey, I love the fact that we've got this. Public sex laws in California. Okay, that's where we're at. We're in the liberalist of states. Penal code 647A makes it a crime, quote, No. To engage in or to solicit anyone to engage in.

Jenna's over here nodding her head like, you already knew this or you were just looking it up? I just looked it up too, I was like, hmm? Engage in lewd or dissolute conduct in any public place or in any place open to the public or exposed to public view. You can't, well, okay. I just said I was all about committing a crime.

Cause you didn't think it was public sex when it was in your private place. But when the windows are open, it is. Wow, what about New York though? Cause that's where I do my public sex. I do it only in Manhattan. I don't do it in Los Angeles. So I'm just gonna-

And for the record, I have not done it. I've only had discussions. If the FBI is listening to this, because I know it would immediately be a federal case if I was caught having sex in a window. Is it a crime to have sex in a car in New York? Oh, is it? You are charged with a misdemeanor.

Oh, okay. You're not going to go to jail, but you- I can handle a misdemeanor. But you don't wanna end up with a criminal record for life. But yeah, but in the job interview, it's like, have you ever been arrested? Well, I don't know why they're asking about car sex.

Let me tell you, I had sex in a car. Are you not gonna hire me because of that? I had sex, I put my butt cheeks right up against a window in Manhattan. That sounds different. What do I search? Law sex with curtains open NYC. Sex in your own home laws.

Yeah, I feel like, man, you should be able to do it. Because it's not like people are like up against the window with their eyes taped open. You know what I'm saying? They've got the ability. I think we should advocate for this law to be changed. If it is indeed illegal to have sex with the windows open in Manhattan,

I believe that we should advocate against this law. I don't think this is the hill I'm going to die on. No, I'm moving to Manhattan. I'm going to be there long enough to become a city council member, and this is my campaign. Jenna, what'd you find?

I think there's a case to argue in California, because there's also the peeping Tom law that it's illegal to peep in a door or window on a private property without consent of the owner. Peeping Tom law, it's illegal to peep in a what? In a door or window. In a door or window on private property

without the consent. So if they step onto your property and are looking in while you're doing it, they are in trouble. Yeah, yeah, if they're on your property. The pe illegal to. And they're looking in. Yeah. While you're doing it, they are in trouble. Yeah, yeah, if they're on your property. The peeping Tom thing is, again, the peeping Tom thing obviously is a different thing in my mind because that's clearly just like an invasion

of someone's privacy. I'm talking about somebody. If you get a good lawyer, and we have them, we can get off. I'm just talking, get off? I mean. I think if you get off on someone's watching, then that's breaking the law.

I'm talking about maybe just foreplay and then you close the curtain. I need to be prepared for this conversation. The fact that we're having it unprepared to me makes me a little uncomfortable. Yeah. But I will say, someone asked on Avvo, which is a lawyer directory. I don't know how legit this is, so that's my disclaimer.

I walk around my home nude sometimes. I usually keep shades closed, but I did not close them and neighbor saw me naked. I was not having sex or touching myself. Nothing sexual. It just was cooking breakfast. And that's not a euphemism for anything. I looked out my window and there she was.

Just feel like I'm in my own home. I did not intend for her to see. And one attorney answered, a prosecutor could charge you with indecent exposure if someone is able to see you nude while they are in a public place. Don't do it. Yeah, there's a bit of courtesy here.

Maybe I'm a live free kind of guy. Yeah, don't do it in a way that people can see you. That's not, if you're doing it to exhibit, then you're being, then that's, I think that crosses a line. We recently had a friend tell us that the idea of being comfortable with nakedness, and I mean non-sexual nakedness, I mean like roommates who may walk around naked.

Yeah. Was a Southern thing. Do you remember this? Yeah. Did you agree with this assessment? I didn't agree, but I didn't wanna argue it, because I think he might have a point. You think it's a Southern thing to be naked?

I know of multiple people, and this is gonna sound nuts, literally. I know of multiple people who say that growing up, their dad would just be naked in the house. All right. And I don't mean this like, oh, going from the shower to get dressed. I mean, dad is in the living room watching sports.

That's weird. Naked. That's odd. I'm not saying I advocate for it. No, you don't. I wouldn't be afraid. The only thing I'm advocating for, just to go on the record, is that it should be okay to have sex in Manhattan

while you're in a hotel with your partner on vacation, or multiple partners, I'm not, whatever you wanna do, because people have the ability to close the curtains on the other side. That's the only thing I'm advocating for. I think I wanna table this as potentially- A whole episode? A whole episode. Just a minute ago, you were uncomfortable with it,

now you wanna do a whole episode about it? Cause then I can be prepared and we can get emails from people- Lawyers. Well, we can get voicemails from people all over the place. It's like, are you in the South? And did your, somebody in your family, were they like naked all the time?

Or was it just part of it? Like how do you deal with nakedness? It's just the weather. You know, back in the day, I said the moment of nakedness should be minimized. I don't know where I stand. I got to figure this out. What was the last thing that filled you with wonder that took you away from your desk or your car in traffic?

Well, for us, and I'm going to guess for some of you, that thing is... Anime! Hi, I'm Nick Friedman. I'm Lee Alec Murray. And I'm Leah President. And welcome to Crunchyroll Presents The Anime Effect. It's a weekly news show. With the best celebrity guests.

And hot takes galore. So join us every Friday wherever you get your podcasts and watch full video episodes on Crunchyroll or on the Crunchyroll YouTube channel. But let's hear a few more voicemails on this subject matter. Warning, we're getting into the poop zone. Good. Hi, guys. I saw your tweet about bad neighbor horror stories, so I wanted to tell you about my old neighbors.

We'll call them Jim and Joette. Joette. Jim and Joette had 250-pound Newfoundlands that used to do shits on our lawn pretty constantly. And we would ask them to stop or pick up their dog's shit and they never would. So one day on a particularly cold night after all of their dog's shit had frozen in our yard, my dad picked up every single Newfoundland shit that was in our yard and put it in a grocery bag on their porch. Their dogs never shit in our yard again. Wow.

Did he light it? I love your dad. And knock on the door? That's great. Common. This is classic. This person sounds like they come from a place where shit is not a curse word. Or is at least their favorite word.

You know, I just love the way they say shit. Yeah, it's very percussive. This is great. Do you know about these dogs? Newfoundland dogs? 250 pounds, that's a bunch of shit. Yeah, that's a big old shit. Again and again and again.

But hey, I think you have a conversation. Yeah, they didn't respond. You gotta take it up a level. It's like, hey, look at the volume of this. Here it is. Do with it what you want. But the thing that I don't like is having to put signs in your yard.

Don't poop here. Like as cute as they get all throughout our neighborhood where I walk my dogs, you know, I will clean up my dog's dookies. Yes. If it's in- And you won't do it because of a sign. If it's in a prominent part of the yard.

You're not doing it because of a sign, you're doing it because you're a responsible, courteous person. But I don't like using the bags, so what I'll do is I'll usually take it and I'll find some natural stuff like leaves and rocks and I'll pick up the poop using these natural elements and then I'll throw all of that into like

a more unlandscaped area. Whoa, whoa, whoa, okay. No, no, no, no, man. And then I did it this morning. No, no, you're part of the problem. And then. You're this, you're on the wrong end of this. You're the guy with the big dogs.

I don't leave a shit in someone's. You throw it into a more landscaped area? Not landscaped, a more, a less landscaped area, like a rustic area, like a more wooded, unkempt, unlandscaped area. You don't know what's going on in the area. I mean, and sometimes I'll bury it. What's the problem with the bags?

I don't like carrying a bag around on my dog's walk. It's like, and this is what I- No, there's a solution here. If the problem, I thought you had some environmental issue. Like you were like, I don't like plastic bags. And I was gonna say, A, you can get the compostable, like biodegradable bags. I have those. Second thing is- And I was carrying them.

Second thing is- I just didn't wanna use it. You can choose to do, there's three things that you can do. Option number one is what you don't wanna do, which I don't disagree, which is carry a warm poop bag all the way back to your house, okay? Then you're the bitch. Okay. Option number two, which I believe is much less offensive

than what you've chosen as option number three, is just put it in somebody's trash can. There were no trash cans out. Oh, you can always find somebody's trash can. No, uh-uh. You can always find somebody's trash can. And that might lead to an uncomfortable conversation. I'm walking around just looking for a trash can now.

You can't put some dog shit in a rustic area. You can't do that. Some people, their rustic areas are their favorite parts of the yard. Some people's children play hide and seek and they go in the bushes. That's the best place to hide when you're doing a good hide and seek game.

You got these kids that you want to be outside getting fresh air and they're in their favorite hiding spot and all of a sudden there's some shit that's got some bark, leaves, and rocks mixed in because you tried to hide it. Yeah. This is the situation that you're creating. I hid Jade's shit and then I run around the corner

and here's Jasper shitting like in the street. Yeah, that sounds like something Jasper would do. Everything around me was too landscaped. I think if the dog shits in the middle of the street, you can leave it. No, that's where people walk, that's where people drive. And so I had to resort to using the bag. And then I got to a certain point and I said,

you know what? I'm gonna leave this bag here because I know I'm coming back. And then, but I'm not gonna forget this bag. You left the bag in the street? I left the bag in a certain spot where I knew I was gonna turn the corner and come back home. You did temporary litter?

Yeah, temporarily I littered. This is so wrong. But I did remember it. How about tying the bag around your dog's collar so they have to deal with it? So they'll think twice about it next time. And it was because the trash cans weren't out that day. Okay.

Listen, I'm putting myself out there. At least you don't have a Newfoundland. Okay, so I... This roommate is way worse than the story is, but this is the, this is like funny bad as opposed to just like, holy crap bad. Okay. was not good at taking care of him and she tried to convince us that it was normal that he would like to poop in the shower and there was nothing we could do to stop that other than leave two inches of water in our bathtub at all times a poop pool we did that for a year it sucked and it didn't stop him from pooping outside the litter box.

And she did nothing about it. Ooh, that's bad. Oh, so they put the water in there so he would stop doing it. Yeah, and then he just started pooping other places. I think it's cool that the cat takes a shower though. Don't necessarily know if that's what was happening. I'm crapping in the shower.

Yeah, there's not a positive spin to this. I mean, if that were in our game, we're still good. No, no, you can always find out. This would actually be a good thing. Yeah, yeah, yeah. My cat poops in the shower, but we're still good because. I take, I don't shower. It's not my bathroom.

Yeah, right, yeah. Wow, this is interesting. You got to have responsibility for your pets and you have to find a solution. I mean, I'm not, I don't have to know the solution to know that it's your responsibility to find the solution. Period. This is definitely a roommate relationship ending scenario.

Yeah, if you don't, yeah. If you're not solving the problem. I think there's just something about, one of the things that a lot of these things have in common is an inability to put yourself in your roommate's shoes and just think like, the other person's shoes in general. Right. What would it be like if I was them and their cat-

I wouldn't care about it, you know. Was pooping everywhere. I mean, it is a shower. All you gotta do is take the nozzle down and just like blast it down the drain. Yeah, sure. And if there are people like that, who that's the way they think,

then you just don't be their roommate. Let them live with other people who have shitty cats. I haven't listened to this one yet, but based on just like the header above it, I think this one gets worse than the last one. Hey, hello there, Rhett and Link. This is the subject. My roommate crapped in the middle of

the room. I was using the restroom. We have a one restroom apartment kind of complex. And as I was using it, I walked back out and I smelled a smelly smell that smells smelly.

And it smelled like a fresh deuce, to put it lightly. And I'm like, what's that smell? And he just kind of looked at me and was like, oh, I had to use the restroom. And I'm like, you had to use the restroom? Like, where at? And he's like, oh, I just did it in here. And this is just a one-room only room, you know, other than the bathroom that I was in. And I like had a horrified look on my face.

I'm like, where did you use it? And all I had to do was just look down and I saw a towel he used and I just, I was in discomfort. Okay, this one isn't over, but I've heard enough. You know, I've heard enough. I was on the edge of my, but I've heard enough. You know, I've heard enough. I was on the edge of my seat. I don't wanna hear. There was a towel involved.

I don't wanna hear anymore. There's no way out of this. Break up now. Eviction. Grounds for eviction. Well, but. Can we just go back to the cat? I have another cat one.

Let's just forget that even happened. No, because this is a situation, okay? This is a situation. You think this gets better? I'll keep playing it. No, no, you don't have to keep, I'm saying. I'll keep playing it. If you've gotta take, if you're in a place

that's got one bathroom and two people got shit at the same time, what do you do? Because I haven't had this situation personally, but I have good friends who have had this situation multiple times. You don't go on the floor. Right. You go in something, on something. I have good friends who have had this situation multiple times. You don't go on the floor. Right. Go in something. Well, I have- On something.

I have one friend- In a grocery bag. Who was with his father and they were in a motel situation. They got back. You know when you've been out and you're like with your dad or with, you're just with one other person,

you get back to the hotel room and you both gotta take a shit. Yeah. The older you get, the more often this happens. And then you got to say, well, who's got to take a shit more? Cause that person wins. And sometimes it's like, well, I got to go more,

but you're typically a quick shitter. My wife shits faster than I do. Let's just be, let's just put it out there. So she usually gets to go first if we run into this situation. Okay. I'm just a tall man. I think my intestines are long or something.

But this guy got into a situation where he won the battle, so he's on the toilet and his dad's like, I gotta do this. And so he went and he leaned over into the bathtub and shit into the bathtub. Like a cat. Just like a cat would do. This to me is acceptable. Trash can.

Because you got porcelain, you know, you're shitting into a porcelain container that's got water, it's easily washable. Yeah. Now you're related and so it's, you're seeing your dad leaning his ass over edge of a bathtub is different than your just roommate that,

I don't know how close these people were. But you. And if these people were. But you- And if they're Southern. But you got like, you got trash cans, you've got sinks. I feel like I can pretty quickly go through the hierarchy of where you go after you can't get to the toilet. And the first place is not a towel in the living room. Okay?

Yeah. That's disqualifying. I think you just, you take their name off the lease if they do that. All right. Let's wrap it up with just, let's go back to cats. Let's just. Hey boys. Hey. I'm calling with my bad roommate horror story. I lived for a short period of time with an older lady and her two cats, who were also older. One of them unfortunately passed away from old age. She was well into her 20s.

Wow. And my roommate wasn't quite sure what to do. So she cleared all of my food out of the refrigerator, put her dead cat in a shoebox, and kept it in the refrigerator until she could figure it out. I didn't live there for long after that. Refrigerator or freezer? Because there is a difference. She said fridge, man. Hey, she cleaned the food out first.

Did it fit in a drawer? Would you put it in the fruit drawer or the? The fresh drawer. You gotta keep that thing fresh. I think you put it in the meat drawer. You gotta put it in the fresh drawer until we figure it out. You put it where the bacon goes.

Figure what out? Am I gonna get it stuffed? Yeah, I mean, you should have put it in the freezer. I just need some time to figure it out. You put it where the bacon goes. Figure what out? Am I gonna get it stuffed? Yeah, I mean, you should have put it in the freezer. I just need some time to figure this out. Oh gosh. This is so disturbing. Oh, poor, this is just a sad, sad story. I mean, did you, how do you, what's the,

I mean, it was in a box, but still. But not a bag? I know. I mean, I feel like I could be like, I feel like if you really are gonna, if you need to put your cat in a fridge, first of all, put it in the freezer. Second of all, put it in a bag.

Third of all, lie about what it is. You know what I'm saying? Put a label on it. What'd you put in there? Oh, my cousin went halibut fishing in Canada. You know what I'm saying? And so, yeah, I don't know when I'm gonna get to that halibut.

You just, there's just so many other ways around this. I wonder how she found out. Did she like, where's my food? It's boxed. And then she's peeking in the box, you know? That is a shocking moment. Oh, gosh. But, you know, if the cat's 20 and like,

it's an elderly roommate, it's like, I mean, you... The older you get, the more leeway you get with like refrigerating your cats. Yeah, I mean, I don't know how it was rectified, but... Oh my goodness. Is that what you want to end on? I guess we're ending on that one, dude. That's it.

Man, I'm glad that the people I live with, I can say anything I need to say to them, they can say anything they need to say to me. And we're pretty much, we don't align and agree on everything, but we can work through it. That is the common thread. That is the common thread in all these situations. We stress on a regular basis, communication is key.

You gotta keep those communication lines open, especially if somebody's got an elderly cat and a propensity to place it in the fridge after it dies. If you're talking on a regular basis before that happens, then maybe it won't happen. You know, just keep talking to your roommates. And if your roommates won't talk to you and they're doing weird stuff, you know what?

Just keep an eye on that lease end date and figure out a new situation if you can. All right, I got a rec for you. You can end with something to listen to on your own time. A while back, I tweeted, how did I get here? And I put a screenshot of my Spotify where I was, it was just the lyrics were all Icelandic. And I was listening to this Icelandic folk pop

that I didn't know how I got to it. But then I realized there was some English and there's this, it's the same artist that I tweeted called Asgeir, Asgeir. It's A with some sort of symbol over it. S-G-E-I-R. And the song that you gotta listen to, I'm obsessed with this song, King and Cross.

It's just like the way that it transitions. Sounds like a 90s Christian song, just so you know. It's from 2013, his album In the Silence. So yeah, I've been sleeping on this Icelandic folk guy. Those Icelanders, they'll do some stuff. King and Cross is an amazing song. It like has this unexpected, like, it goes into a different gear and the way that it does

is just, it's just very interesting. We got a tempo change? It's, yeah, it's a tempo change, but it's like, I just love the transition from the verse to the bridge of this thing. You have to listen to it to know what I'm talking about. King and Cross, Ask Gear. It's the song that I'm obsessed with right now.

I'll have to check it out and you will too. Thank you for all these voicemails. That was fun. We're gonna keep asking you to send us messages and stories and you know what you can always do? You don't have to wait for us to do a specific prompt. If you've got a question, an observation, something that you want to say about Ear Biscuits

or something you'd like to hear us talk about, just leave a message. We listen to them all. 1-888-EAR-POD-1. Hashtag Ear Biscuits too. See you next week. Hi, Ear Biscuits. I'm staying anonymous here,

but I want to preface this by saying, I know that this is not her fault in any way. She couldn't control this. But my freshman year of college, I got assigned randomly to a dorm with a girl who had frequent night terrors. And so she would wake up around 3 in the morning almost every night screaming bloody murder and would get up and run across the room. She would go jiggle the door handle and scream, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.

And then she would just walk back to bed and keep sleeping. And I had to deal with that for an entire school year. And I know it's not her fault, but it was a horror for me to witness. Hello, Rhett and Link. This is David, long-time listener, first-time caller. So I have a quick horror story about my former roommate. I lived with them for about seven months, and during that entire seven months, they never once ever washed their towel that they used for showers. I would see them frequently using it as a hand towel and blowing their nose and after a shower. So after

like seven months of just months and months of just grime and mildew and filth, he finally, finally, finally decided to just throw it away instead of washing it. Hey, Brett and Link. My name is Ashley from Oregon, and my bad neighbor story is that years ago, I slipped on the sidewalk outside of my apartment and injured my foot. As I was lying there crying in pain, my neighbor came running out. I thought he was going to help me, but instead he hovered his hands over my foot and insisted that he was healing me. Needless to say,

it didn't work and I actually had broken my foot in multiple places. Love all that you guys do. Bye!