Ear Biscuits with Rhett & Link - What Will Our Last Words Be? | Ear Biscuits Ep. 418

Episode Date: March 18, 2024

Ever thought about what your last words might be? In this episode, Rhett and Link explore the last words of some very famous people, to get some inspiration for their own last words. Plus, why they wouldn’t want to make their dogs Insta-famous, while still trying to figure out who’s got the best pet for one. Get $20 off your first order. Sign up today at butcherbox.com/EAR and use code EAR and get 1 year free of your choice of 3 lbs of chicken thighs, 2 lbs of ground beef, or 1 lb of premium steak tips! Get $75 credit when you go to indeed.com/EARS . To learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices

This, this, this, this is Mythical. to reward Slayer. Rise to it with the BMO Eclipse Rise Visa Card and get rewarded for paying your credit card bill in full and on time each month. Terms and conditions apply. Click the banner or visit bmo.com slash rise to learn more. Welcome to Ear Biscuits, the podcast where two lifelong friends talk about life for a long time. I'm Rhett. And I'm Link. This week at the roundtable of dim lighting, we're going to have a really fun and upbeat conversation about famous last words. Words that famous people uttered right before they died.

Or the last words heard before they died. But it's going to be fun. In the process, we can prepare. Oh, yeah. In case we ever... Prepare our remarks. In case we can anticipate it, we can anticipate our own deaths,

we'll know what to say. So that we can be on internet lists someday, which is really the goal. Leave a legacy. That type of legacy. Be in a Mental Floss article after you die. A list legacy. You know, the first thing I thought when you said we should prepare right now was, okay,

well, I know what my last words are going to be. It's going to be, I can't remember what I was going to say. That's real. Please don't let that happen. Yeah. Because I'll prepare it And then I just I won't be able to remember Maybe you should script it

Maybe I should tattoo it On my On like my palm So I can read it Or just write it Every time I get out of the shower Yeah It might be overkill

It's really It's a good reminder Today could be the day Write what your last words are on your hand. You know, speaking of today could be the day, we were, before we talk about that morbid subject, let's talk about another morbid subject. But can we keep it upbeat?

Oh, it's good. The whole thing's gonna be upbeat. Okay, good. We have a friend who has a very, very cute dog. I mean, such a tiny little chihuahua that's so tiny that it's like, how does this thing, like, how does its heart beat? You know what I'm saying?

It's like it's so small, I'm always afraid to touch it, that I'm gonna step on it. It's a chihuahua that has the patterns of a cow. And it's smaller than your foot. Yes. Wonderful dog. So if you stepped on it, you would lose it under your foot. And we love this dog. So if you stepped on it, you would lose it under your foot. And we love this dog.

The thing is, is we, you know... You can carry it around in your pocket. It's so cute. When we were hanging out with our friend, we were like, you know, you really have like the perfect candidate for a TikTok dog. But then I immediately said, I shouldn't have said that, and you do not want to be someone who owns a TikTok dog. But I said, I know you got all this cute footage of your dog. It doesn't work that way.

You can't just take old footage. Goge. His name is Goge. You have to take. Here's what I said. I said, send me all the footage, and I'll just create the account. No, you won't. You don't even check your email.

That's true. And then I'll slowly disseminate this footage. It's not won't. You don't even check your email. That's true. And then I'll slowly disseminate this footage. It's not timestamped. You don't even have your own. So I was like, you know what, Rhett, you're right, but what I'm saying is a good way to get around that. Just give your footage to somebody else, and then you don't have to be the one to do it.

But the main problem you were pointing out was... There is a very high chance that you are going to outlive your famous TikTok dog, and then you're going to come on there and show your human face crying about your famous dog that died. Because it's on the account, everybody follows, they want to see another picture of the dog, and then you got to come on and say guys it's over and here's the thing just like yelp reviews i am a taker a receiver not a giver whatever the you know i i use them but i don't give them yeah you're i enjoy pet tiktok accounts you're a bottom i think is what it's the more

creative the better but the issue is is that I don't want to put first of all I don't have time. But if I did have time and I had a dog that I thought was a candidate for a TikTok account which I'm not sure I do. I would not

I wouldn't do it. I wouldn't do it. I want to enjoy these but I don't want to sign up for it because you know they're going to die. They're going to die before you man. it because you know they're gonna die. They're gonna die before you, man. And then you have to make that video.

As a side note, before I talk about the video, I will say that out of all of our dogs, all four of them, I think Barbara is the only one that's like feed material. It all depends on what you... All of our dogs are postable, but to have a following and a consistent performance mentality,

Jade doesn't have patience for that. Jasper only wants to go on a walk and Sean will bite you. So, I mean, then you're left with Barbara. Maybe you're not as... Who likes to perform. As thorough of a student as I am of these accounts because there's several ways you can take it. Yes, if it is about the dog doing cool stuff,

Barbara is the only candidate. No, I'm thinking just like cute posed photos. Can you get those out of Sean? Yeah, listen, when we go on a walk, everyone stops us and talks about Sean. He has the whole side of his face is black, and then the other side is white. So many people look at it, and he's got this derpy look that people just love in pets.

Okay, there you go. Maybe it's Sean then. If we were to put Sean in outfits and just pose him in different places. Will he wear an outfit? Like Sean in Paris.

Yeah. He will wear an outfit. What's he gonna, yeah, I mean, I mean, I don't ask him. We just put it on him. And he doesn't start acting like,

oh my gosh, what's wrong? No, he acts as, he acts as if there's nothing that has happened to him. I mean, we did that thing where we put the flannel shirts on, me and Jesse and Barbara and Sean, and they were all fine. And we got by far the best pictures of Sean.

Okay, well, Sean's your one. But I don't want to do that. But that raises the slightly related question, which is just because we don't have TikTok accounts dedicated to our animals doesn't mean that we're not gonna have to make that video, that inevitable video, when they die. We're talking about our dogs right now.

I think we are gonna have to let people know. Well, of course we're gonna let them know, but are you gonna devote a whole episode of this podcast to it? Are you gonna talk about it on Good Mythical Morning? Or is it just make a more? You know, like,

how do you, what do you do? What do you do with these dogs that are going to die and leave a hole in our hearts? I mean, just this morning, I was watching Jon Stewart talk about his

three-legged pit bull that died, and he was a crying mess, as you would expect. I watched the beginning of that video, and then I kept going because I didn't actually see the dog. I just saw him, and he wasn't crying at the beginning. Oh, yeah, he tried to get, he tried. He was at the desk, right? Yeah, he thought he was going to,

and like literally when he said, Brindle Pitbull, he just, like, he was like, he brought out the tissues and then he just couldn't do it. I mean, that's what will happen. I know. And yes, we're going to mention it. Yes, we're going to talk about it. Yes, I'm sure inevitably we will cry.

I'm sure inevitably we will cry. But my question is, you know, I think we probably did a whole episode on Jade, right? Because she was the first dog. We did a whole more on Jade, that's for sure. I'm sure. I mean, listen, man. We're about to just read the last words of famous people. We'll do anything for an episode.

That's true. And there'll be so much bereavement, and it'll be such a grieving process that I think is something that we'll probably want to process here. So I think it will happen, even though my initial answer I thought was going to be, I'm just going to put up, like like text, make a text post that says, please respect the family in this time of grief. And, you know, just like stay out of it. Just not get into it.

I don't think it definitely can't be fresh. Well, it does raise this question about what is fodder for content, right? I mean, I hate to say this, and I don't know. Maybe this is why these last words were on my mind. I mean, Jamie put this in the document, but maybe the reason my mind was drawn to it is because of this Jon Stewart video, but also the first TikTok I saw this morning was a man just losing his shit over the fact that his daughter had just died. Oh, gosh, Rhett, why?

That just came up on your feed? This stuff happens, man. It happens. And what I'm saying is that I was like, I can't watch this. And, like, I think it literally just happened and the first thing that he did was make a tiktok that's that's and and and i don't quite get it and and you know i mean obviously he's not thinking straight you know it's like you're in the middle of this grieving process but it just made me think, like, wow, what an interesting world we live in that,

and it was literally like, I don't know what to do. I don't know what to do with this grief, so I'm gonna make a TikTok. Well, maybe he got some help as a result of it. Maybe he did, and I'm sure it's like, okay, you end up, when you put something out in the world. It wasn't a money grab. It was a legitimate, okay, you end up, when you put something out in the world. It wasn't a money grab. It was a legitimate processing of emotion,

maybe a cry for help here. Well, and the thing is that lots of people ask us, why do you guys talk about, fill in the blank, why do you guys talk so much about your deconstruction? Why do you talk about your sex lives every September? Isn't anything sacred or whatever? Is everything just content? Are you just trying to stir the pot and get views?

That's a good question. And the honest answer to that is, well, once you create an outlet, once you create an outlet whereby which you are sharing your thoughts on things, the things that rise to the surface are going to be the things that are the most significant, the most impactful, and you just end up talking about them. But it just creates this weird thing because you're making content that is part of a business model. Yeah.

And so now, and I always say that it's actually one of the things that has, you know, I'm still working on my anti-anxiety mantra, but one of the elements of it at this point, it's less, as you said, it's a mantra that has multiple pieces that I could say any one piece at any time, depending on the situation. So I guess it's multiple mantras. Maybe sometimes I will say the whole thing. But one part of it is what will be, will be, and will be a good story. Yeah, it seems like there could be a dark side to that. Because I get a little anxious about the future from time to time. And when I find myself entering into a situation where things could go sideways, I think to myself, like even...

Having a podcast feels like it redeems it. There's a silver lining to like, man, this is crappy. But I can talk about it on the podcast. Right. The content catch 22. I don't think that that has the ring of health to it that like, this is really crappy, but it's an opportunity for me to grow.

You know, I don't think it's quite as healthy as that. I wasn't really thinking about our podcast when I said it will be a good story, but I think about how much of my life is based in story. You know, in one sense, my career is based around telling stories, and I love telling stories. And you spend a lot more time processing the story of the event than you do the event itself. And these stories connect people. They give you something to talk with about other people it is a way to like process and explore so when i find myself heading into a potentially

dangerous situation uncertain situation the what will be will be and will be or could be really a good story it's not really a good story. It's not always a good story. Does give me this thing that like I could go through something really, really crazy. But on the other end of it, I've got an experience that shapes me, but also I can share as part of the process. As long as your dog doesn't die in the process. Well, then you've got two stories. process as long as your dog doesn't die in the process well then you've got two stories i yeah i mean the the the guy who told me it's better to have a good story than a good time

was not a podcaster is that abraham lincoln it was just a guy who he was an older guy that like i respected and it was like he was i remember him this, like, on the precipice of me moving out to L.A. for everything that we were going after. Okay. We didn't start a podcast for, you know, years after that. So it was something that he had adopted as kind of like a mindset of, well, I would say it's a growth mindset. It's a way to turn something negative into something positive because it's gonna happen. You know, sometimes things are gonna go sideways.

This is a way to make the best of it. You know, I'll have a good story, you know. I like it. As long as I survive what I'm in, then I'll have a good story. It has a good ring to it. It has a good ring to it. The thing I don't like about that specific quote is it really only works when you're having a bad time.

Right? Better to have a good story than a good time. Because I actually, in the moment, if things aren't going bad, I do want to be having a good time. And I want to be able to stop and be like going bad, I do want to be having a good time. And I want to be able to stop and be like, oh, I do want to have a good time. This isn't just about preparing for something. You know, we've been talking about this quite a bit, about this idea of we've been really results-oriented for our entire lives and our careers.

And, you know, we talked about it in the Book of Mythicality a little bit. for our entire lives and our careers. And, you know, we talked about it in the Book of Mythicality a little bit. There was things like pick a direction and go, and there was stop and celebrate. And we kind of touched at this. Different ways to tease out the idea of it's not just about the destination, it's also about the journey.

And we're trying to figure that out, like, with the show that we're working on right now which is the thing that we are most passionate about creatively the amount of time that we're going to spend making it right is going to be so much larger than the amount of time that it ends up being, you know, than the runtime of the thing. Right. And then also whatever the feeling that we get from, like, once it's given to the world, first of all, if we're waiting to see how people respond to it and we're relying on there being a net positive response to it

in order to fill some sort of satisfaction. Then we're just setting ourselves up for disappointment because what if everybody hates it? But what if everybody hates it, but we loved everything about the process and everything that we put into it, and we loved the process and we loved the product, and then nobody else liked it? It still should be, it's still a beautiful thing, right? Yes. You know, I think we can have our cake and eat it too, because I believe the way that we're crafting this series is that we are, we are crafting rewarding experiences for us to have.

We're crafting legitimate questions for us to explore that, I will say in the loosest sense of the verb, we're documenting that process, right? And so it's kind of a, the product is going to be a memorial and a representation of the experience we've had, the things that we actually learned and the way that we reflected or grew or I don't know, fill in the blank, enriched our friendship. So I think I will enjoy watching it back because for those reasons.

It's a way to also remember, it's just like a wedding video. Like you don't get married for the wedding video. Right. I mean, you shouldn't. I mean, I think some people might actually the more I think about it, but don't get married for the wedding video. However, you really should have the best possible wedding video that you can because you will go back to it and you will watch it. Will you though?

If it's good. Will you though? Have you done that? Yeah, I mean, not recently, but Jessie and I have gone back and watched elements of our wedding video. Now- I have not done that because the guy who was filming our wedding...

You had a little trouble. There was no... You missed a lot of it. Well, the battery ran out before the ceremony started, and somehow he didn't know this. I'm sorry to bring up a sore subject. If I had to remember that, I wouldn't have brought this example up. Yeah.

You don't graduate for the graduation video. I think weddings are actually better. But anyway. By the way, my mom reminded me that you were the videographer for her wedding to Louis. Oh. You don't remember this either? You know my memory is pretty bad. Unless I take a video that I watch again. I haven't remember this either? You know my memory is pretty bad Unless I take a video Then I watch again

I haven't watched this I'm sure I did some awesome slow zooms Well I'm looking for it Because she wants it And she was thinking Maybe I have a copy of it You know I do not remember doing this

I didn't remember you doing it either, but Christy remembered, and Mom definitely remembered. Well, I'm sure they're right. Christy was pregnant with Lily. We sung a song in her wedding ceremony. You and Christy. Yeah. And apparently you were there being all tall,

operating a camera in the back. The human tripod. But, you know, Mom was talking to me. And apparently you were there being all tall, operating a camera in the back. The human tripod. But, you know, mom was talking to me. You know, she was like, oh, here we are talking about, I mean, it's another element of loss. Hey, it's part of life, man. It's part of this episode, too. She was like, you know, I just want to hear Lewis's voice.

And I realized that I had one video and I wanted to see if I had, I wanted to get the wedding video. Just so I could hear his voice again, which is, you know, a moving request. She didn't have, like, videos on her phone of him talking? She didn't take many videos, but, like, last night I went through, like, all the videos on my phone. Okay. You know, for the past decade or so. And a little over a decade. And, you know, now you're able to search by somebody's, like, name and face. And then you can just, there's all the images.

And some of them, and it even searches the videos. Like, it scrubs the videos now. Right. So it pulled those up. So I had a few that I'm going to be able to send her that i think will be nice um what were you talking about we were talking about you don't get married for the way oh you don't get but you should make a great wedding video but you get married you also don't get married for the wedding you get married to begin the the relationship but i do think that

when we watch the videos that we're making, much more so than when you think about an episode of Good Mythical Morning, which literally like kind of what you're seeing is what happened. Right.

Everything that goes, I mean, there's behind the scenes stuff, but like you're kind of seeing this real time unfolding of the things that we were doing or eating or whatever.

And I don't go back and watch those for that reason. I was there and watching it back is like just being there again. But these videos are like, each one is days of our time of actually doing the stuff, but months of our time of planning and all this stuff that, all the things that we're thinking about

and all the conversations that we're having together and with the team. And then you see this final product and it just represents so much time. It's so personal to us. It's funny because it reminds me of a video I watched recently and it was a guy and he was sitting there with a piece of art and it just kind of looked like a piece of junk. But as

he kind of brought it close to the camera, he was like, I've been working on this for years. And it was like these like metal pieces and wires and spirals. And then there was like all these interesting like stones and jewels kind of put into it then there was all these interesting stones and jewels kind of put into it. It was almost just like, just a intricate piece of metal art that had jewels all over it. Okay.

And he was like, I have spent years on this, and I'm putting it on TikTok shop, and I'm listing it for $150,000. What? And all the comments were like, and I'm putting it on TikTok shop, and I'm listing it for $150,000. And all the comments were like, yeah, you're going to enjoy this for a long time. Like, you're not going to sell this for $150,000.

But it was interesting because what was happening in his mind, and I don't know what the status of it at this point, but what was happening in his mind is he was like, when I look at this thing, I think about all the time that I put into it. I think about all the care that I put into it. And one of the ways that I've captured up all the time and the care and the talent, I mean, he's got a talent to do this thing, is in this object.

But when you look at it. When I look at it, I'm like, I don't care. I don't care about the time and the talent. Is that what's going to happen with our show? No, but it matters to him. That's what I'm saying. Is that good enough for us? I think it should be.

If you're healthy, it should be, right? The healthier you are, the more that simply the value that you place into the thing that you've created is where it is the true value of it now if that guy's business in livelihood depended on him selling that thing for something that made sense of the hours that he put into it yeah that is the complicating factor that we're doing this creative exercise in the context of a business model that needs to pay people's salaries. So we hope that it works. But it should be more so that we could do more of it, not so that we will feel some sort of validation because people like it. Right.

Speaking of which, you should sell that shirt. Oh yeah. Many, many hours went into the creation of this shirt that we are selling at mythical.com for $150,000. Now the beauty of this shirt is that there's more than one. Now there are limited quantity in a variety of sizes. It's called the Gentle Giant's shirt

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how are we going to do this? You're going to, I'm just going to read some of them. You're going to read some famous last words. And let's see what it, let's see how we take it. Now, when you get information off of the internet,

sometimes it's made up. A lot of times it's made up. But mental floss tends to be a pretty reliable source in my experience. So I think there is like a 84% confidence that these are all true. Okay. Starting with Joseph Wright.

I don't even know who this is. Well, when you find out who he is and what he did, this becomes fitting. He was a linguist who edited the English dialect dictionary and his last words were dictionary. His last word was dictionary? Dictionary. That's one word.

Yeah, it was really- What were the words that led up to dictionary? We don't know. Dictionary. I can't remember what I was gonna say. Dictionary. But just think about it. If you have one thing, one indelible mark

that you want to leave on the world and you believe that it is the fact that you edited the English dialect dictionary, we're talking about him right now. And the only reason we're talking about him is because his last word was dictionary. It worked. I think this may be my word too.

One. Like, I want, yeah. It worked. I think this may be my word too. Like, yeah, this is what I want people to say about me. Was he a linguist? Not really. Did somebody else have that as their last word? Yeah, he was a linguist. And he did a podcast once about it. So he stole somebody else's last word. Yeah, but it was dictionary.

I mean, if it ain't broke, don't fix it. Dictionary. Yeah. All right, that's mine right now. Well, I think Raphael, you know, Italian artist. Nadal? Not Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle. Oh. His last word was happy.

The first two just start as one word. Yeah, I want some sentences. Well, we'll get, there's 65 of them. Happy. Happy. Like. Actually, also get to people that I actually know. You know Raphael.

Okay, yeah, I guess. Ninja Turtle? That's a good word. I think that might be my last word. Because you want to leave those that you're leaving behind with a positive sentiment. Like, happy. That's good. That's a good one. Well, okay. Interesting that that's how you interpreted it. You interpreted it as him saying happy for the sake of the people around him, or do you think he saw something?

Maybe he was, it made... Happy. I like to think he was like the veil was being lifted, and he was merging with the greater consciousness, and he was happy. I think yours is going to be what, when you went under the anesthesia for the colonoscopy. No, no, I'm not talking about bowels.

No, you were like, it was like you were going down a hole. I also said, oh shit, at one point. I'm sure oh shit has been a lot of people's last words. Right, right. Okay. You don't know this guy, but because it's one word, I want to wrap up with the one word.

Composer Gustav Mahler, he died in bed conducting an imaginary orchestra, and his last word was Mozart! Why do you yell Mozart when you're conducting an orchestra? I don't know. That was his idol, that's who he wanted to be. Maybe he always felt like he was always just chasing after, you know, to be as good as Mozart. Or maybe they were moving from one song to another. It was like, now we're gonna do Mozart!

Okay, I'm gonna find somebody. Or is it Mozart? moving from one song to another. It was like, now we're going to do Mozart. Okay. Or is it Mozart? I always say Mozart. Now, you know Old Blue Eyes? Sinatra. Sinatra. What's his last word?

I'm losing. I'm losing, baby. It was just, I'm losing I'm losing baby It was just I'm losing I think that That was half of a sentence I'm losing life I'm losing consciousness I'm losing period

Quote I'm losing this battle He ultimately lost And what did he die of? Don't we all? Because that's a good question. If he was dying of, you know... A sword fight?

Maybe. Maybe it was a duel of some sort. It was a heart attack. Oh, it was a heart attack. Okay. Okay, but apparently it was a... Maybe it was a competition to live. You know what I'm saying?

It was 1998. So maybe he had the heart attack and then didn't, you know, didn't immediately die and basically was able to process the fact that I'm losing. Like, this is all the, like, that's one way of seeing it. That just goes to show you that

if he was truly talking about I'm losing, like I've lost the ultimate battle, he wasn't happy. Well, you could lose and be happy. I do it all the time on our show. All right, next. George Orwell. Okay. Who wrote 1984, famously.

These are his last written words, which kind of feels like a cop-out. Well, you gotta tell us now. I didn't see that until I got here. At 50, everyone has the face he deserves. Okay. Wow. His real name was Eric Arthur Blair,

and he died at the age of 46, which is... Oh, that's ironic. That's how old I am at the moment. So he didn't have the face he deserved. He never got it. At 50, everyone has the face he deserves. Huh. Do you understand that?

Does that just mean that, like... I guess you're aging and, like, this is what you've earned. I don't know. He didn't make it, though. He lost. I'm skipping over. He didn't make it, though. He lost. I'm skipping over people that you're going to be like, who's that? Good.

Nostradamus. I know who that is. He can tell the future. Which? Philosopher. This seems, now this might be in the estimated 16% of last words that are not true. Be caution, Ari, about AI.

How about that? He said. Don't, well, okay, go ahead. Tomorrow at sunrise, I shall no longer be here. And then he died. He's got a sense of humor. So you think that he knew that he was a man of predictions, and so... I think he did know that.

He was like, I'm gonna die. Now, a lot of people... He planned this. A lot of people know that, though. He wrote this on his palm. A lot of people seem to know when they are on the way out. Yeah. Right, exactly.

The writing's on the wall, dude. And also, he's reading his hand. Tomorrow at dawn I will no longer be here. Yep. Yep. Now this one's interesting. Doctors say that about people all the time. And raises a question. He's not gonna make it through the night. This raises a question

about what our state of mind might be. And I'll explain in a second. So Herman Melville, writer of Moby Dick, died saying, God bless Captain Veer, referencing his then unpublished novel, Billy Budd, which was found in a bread box after he died. So this man died with the story that he was immersed in on his mind.

Yeah. Like that was the thing he was thinking about. He died working. He died working. Mm-hmm. Now, there's a not insignificant chance that we will die working. Yeah. If you could call it that. I mean, we had to take out new insurance policies just because of some of the decisions that we're making about this new show we're doing.

Oh, gosh. That's true. You know what I'm saying? Ain't that right, Jenna? We did it. It was complicated. We didn't have to get a blood sample, though. No, but, you know, taking out an insurance.

You just had to give them money. We didn't have to get a blood sample, though. No, but, you know, taking out an insurance. We just had to give them money. Yeah, taking out an insurance policy for the two founders of a company who are going to do something risky was a thing we did. What was the price tag on that? A lot. I don't know. It was, it was,

um, it, tens of thousands of dollars? It was, it was, or a hundred, it wasn't a hundred grand. no,

no, no. I don't remember the, cause we, we talked it down a little bit. So it was, um, it's around,

it's around five, five digits. Yeah. I'll say it's, it's a five digit. Lower on the fives. That's for each or both? Both.

Okay, good. Lower on the fives. I looked up. And that's just for the duration of this excursion? Just that day. That is just for the, yeah. The one day. We are insured for that one day.

Doing that one activity. Well, we are insured in general. Yeah. Right. You are insured for that one activity additionally. Right, because your typical life insurance doesn't cover you doing the type of thing in general. Yeah. Right. But you were insured for that one activity additionally. Right. Because your typical life insurance

doesn't cover you doing the type of thing that we're going to be doing. I think. I don't think it is. Well, yes, but not when it's being filmed

for something. Okay. So. Well, I looked up the odds on this. And also, one of the crew members is,

they're not doing the same thing you're doing, but because they're going to be in the area, we also had to get for one of the crew members. I can't say further without giving it all away. I don't want to do that. Now cancel that. Cancel the crew members insurance? Yeah, we don't care about that. Oh, okay. Surprise, it's mine.

For us? It's something like, or the equipment. We also had to insure all the equipment as well. It wasn't just you all. We had to insure a crew member. We had to insure a crew member. Crew members, like, for the benefit of their beneficiaries or for our benefit? Well, I'll say it, and we can bleep it out if you want.

Because it's because he's... Oh, I know that. So if the... I know that part. If something were to happen to the... And he's under contract with us, so it's also to help us because we are paying that crew member for that time. So we need to make sure that our insurance, because we have insurance for all crew, but we need to make sure that this is outside of the crew member's normal scope of activities. The fatality rate is very, very low. based on my calculations, it is more likely that we are seriously injured

or die while driving to go do the thing. I'm sure that's what they say. Well, that's what the studies show. Yes, that is true. Let's move on. I don't want to, the way that I deal with this is by not thinking about it, not by getting more information about it.

Marie Antoinette, who you know was famously executed via guillotine. All right, so right before the blade comes down. Well, you're making it a little, it wasn't quite that dramatic because she stepped on her executioner's foot on her way to the guillotine, and her last words were, Pardonnez-moi, monsieur. How polite. Excuse me, sir. Yeah.

Wow. So she maintained her composure to the very end. Hmm. All right. Give me another. Okay, here we go. Isaac Newton, man of science, man of faith. All right. Okay.

Man of gravitas. Your desire for there to be a longer... He made a speech. More than one word. Here we go. I don't know what I may seem to the world, but as to myself, I seem to have been only like a boy playing on the seashore and diverting myself now and then and finding a smoother pebble or a prettier shell than the ordinary, whilst the great ocean of truth lay all undiscovered before me.

Wow. I can get behind that kind of thing. So he knew that people thought highly of him and his discoveries, and he had a very humble ending. Like, hey, I'm just over here scratching for rocks. That's nice. That's nice. He had like a nice perspective.

And he seemed to recognize. And he was ready to give a speech on his way out. Well, one of the things I've observed about people who live back in the day, at least as you see them, you hear the writings, but also anytime they're portrayed in any kind of movie, you're like, do these people really talk this way? The eloquence was off the charts,

and the vocabulary was off the charts. Obviously not for everybody, but people of a certain status just didn't say things that sounded informal. Communication was an art form. Right. And so... Certainly written, but also spoken. I like to think this was off the cuff is what I'm saying.

I don't think he was like, I've got this thing ready to go in my back pocket that I'm going to whip out right before I die. I like to think that this is just how this man spoke. You don't think it was a statement disseminated through PR? I mean, maybe it was. To TMZ?

Somebody you can really relate to here, Link, Leonardo da Vinci. You once played him in a rap song. Okay. He said, I have offended God and mankind because my work did not reach the quality it should have. Ha ha! Wow! A true artist!

I'm well a perfectionist. Poor guy. I mean, yeah, tortured! Offended God? He has offended God and mankind. Cause he did not get to where he wanted to get. That's... the tenor of that is sad versus what Newton had to say, you know? Right, but don't you have to be a little bit,

I mean, this is the constant question, right? Doesn't this level of unhealthiness, doesn't it lead to people doing things like Da Vinci did? Because if he was healthier, he would've been like, why am I doing this? I'm going to have a coffee. You know what I'm saying? I'm going to take a nap. For real.

Poor guy. I feel for him. Mom, Dad, you should shop Amazon for back to school and save some money. See, I'm currently obsessed with superheroes and need all the superhero stuff. Superhero lunchbox, superhero backpack. But next year, it'll be something else.

Maybe dinosaurs? I don't know. I'm not a fortune teller. But I can tell you not to spend a fortune and shop low prices for school on Amazon. Okay, good chat. Amazon, spend less, smile more. Okay, let's see here. Lots of people I don't recognize. Okay, Benjamin Franklin, I recognize him. Okay. And were all these people writing down what these famous people said when they were dying?

I mean, I guess. Specifically, that question is answered about Benjamin Franklin. As Benjamin Franklin lay dying at the age of 84, his daughter told him to change position in bed so he could breathe more easily. Franklin's last words

were, a dying man can do nothing easy. A dying man can do nothing easy. Yeah, that's very practical. It's very in the moment. I didn't think he knew he was going. He knew he was dying at some point.

He caught himself a dying man, of course. W.C. Field. The one with the cigar. Yeah. Actor and comedian. His last words. God damn the whole frigging world and everyone in it but you, Carlotta. Carlotta.

Speaking to Carlotta Monti, his longtime mistress. Okay. Wow. So I guess she was there. Going out with a bang. Goddamn, the whole frigging world and everyone in it but you. That doesn't sound like a pleasant man to be around. Those old school comedians and actors, man, they were...

Those old school comedians and actors, man, they were, I was listening to Judd Apatow talk about Jerry Lewis. Apparently there's a book about Jerry Lewis. It was designed to be a biography, and the guy showed up to begin interviewing Jerry Lewis like late in his life, and he was just famously difficult. Okay. And he ended up being so difficult that the guy just wrote the biography

about how difficult he was. And it's like this, apparently a really entertaining book because he was just such a egomaniac. Well, you don't wanna, I don't wanna be that way. I don't wanna be grumpy at the end. You know, I wanna be peaceful, you know? I wanna be chill. I don't wanna be grumps, you know?

If I'm fortunate enough to live into my old age, I have the right to be grumpy, but I don't want to be. That sounds like you might have to be actively thinking about that. You wanna be placid, yeah. Speaking of not grumpy, Michael Landon. Okay. Little House on Prairie. Touched by an angel.

Highway to Heaven. Oh, Highway to Heaven, yeah. He was the angel. He famously died of cancer in 1991. Everybody was sad, because everybody loved him. His family had gathered around his bed, and his son said it was time to move on And Landon said, you're right, it's time, I love you all

And that was it You're right, it's time, I love you all That's nice That's a good way to go out That's a good way to go out To basically be released Is there anybody like more modern and cool that died? How about John Wayne?

All right, pilgrim. I mean, yes, this article is from this year, but, you know. What did he say? He said, of course I know who you are. You're my girl. I love you. To his wife. I think he didn't say it to his mistress.

He said it to his wife. Of course I know who you are. So apparently he was answering the question, do you know who I am? Yeah. Yeah, we're like Sherlock Holmes over here. Ernest Hemingway. Cory, I know he wrote stuff that I haven't read.

He unalived himself. He told his wife, Mary, good night, my kitten. My kitten. See, that's, talk about language. You know, I think I'm gonna start calling my wife my kitten. Yeah, because you were talking about how you didn't have a... Pet name.

A pet name for her. I'm gonna try it on for size this afternoon when I see her. Kitten? Hello, my kitten. My kitten. How do you think she'll respond to that? With a crinkled brow and a chuckle. And then she'll ascend up the chimney

to deliver presents elsewhere. Not ultimately positive is how she would respond. Okay, what if you tried something else that was a little bit more... No, that's what I... Come, my kitten, let's dine together. If you know she's not going to like kitten, then why are you going to go for it?

Yeah, I need something. My boo-boo? Oh, no. Do you have a way... Like, is there another... I mean, Christy is already... It already has a why at the end of it like Jessie has at the end of it. Sometimes you'll add an E sound at the end of

somebody's name to make it sound more endearing, but when they already have that name, like Linky. Well, you can't say Christy, you know, it doesn't make any ready. Christigator. Christigator? My short neck giraffe. How about that? She likes giraffes.

Yeah, I feel like you need to spend some time working on that along with your last words. My kitten. This is a great one. It's Groucho Marx. Sense of humor. Bring it. Whose last words were, this is no way to live.

You know he was saving that one up. He was saving that up. Now, his brother, Chico Marx, not quite as popular, you know, the Marx brothers. I didn't know his name was Chico. They started communism. Them and their other brother, Carl. He said, remember, honey, don't forget what I told you.

Put in my coffin a deck of cards, a mashy niblick, and a pretty blonde. It's not a sarcophagus, man. This isn't like a Egyptian tomb. You don't get to fill it full of stuff for the afterlife. A mashy niblick is a... You could. Golf club.

I guess you could. I mean, I wouldn't put a person in there. A blonde? Yeah. What is a flashy niblick? A golf club He wanted to, you know Play golf with a blonde

Alfred Hitchcock One never knows the ending One has to die To know exactly what happens after death Although Catholics have their hopes He shouldn't have added that He shouldn't have added that. He shouldn't have added the Catholic part. It would have been better without it.

You know? He should have edited himself, like his films. Pete Maravich, famous basketball player who's... To some people. Who's, well, to people who know basketball. His dad, Press Maravich, started Campbell Basketball Camp in Buies Creek, North Carolina, where yours truly and you grew up. Did you know that his dad started that?

It's a very successful basketball. It was like one of the first ones in the nation or something? They would say things like that, yeah. I met Vinnie Del Negro there. Okay. J.R. Reid. I also got into another fight. I got into another fight there.

I forget about the fight that I got into there. What happened? Just a couple of punches to the body. You know, like body punches. It didn't really resolve. Against a guy named Brett McLaughlin. Really? Yeah.

I met my mirror image. You were threatened by his name being so close to yours? He was an asshole. Hey, man, change your name! Did he punch you, too? Mm-hmm. Where? Body.

We weren't fighters, you know. Did it hurt? It was one of those things, no. And I didn't hurt him, either. It was one of those things that you're kind of fighting a little bit, but you don't really want to do damage to yourself or your hands. So that's why I forget about it because it wasn't much of a fight.

Meanwhile, Zach and I were not attendees at the basketball camp and we were rummaging through the unlocked dorm rooms that all of the campers stayed in. Just like, we didn't steal stuff. We just messed with people's stuff. Give me an example of messing. Shaving cream in shoes.

Oh, that's pretty bad. Oh, that's horrible, huh? What else? Finding some dirty mags. Found a couple of those. And left them? Put some shaving cream in them. Found a couple of those. And left them? Put some shaving cream in them. Well, so to speak.

Never got caught. Pete Maravich, which there's a really entertaining YouTube video of him. If you just type in Pete Maravich horse. What? Horse, as in the basketball game,

not like a lot of horse. And, which is spelled the same way. But there was a televised game, like one-on-one game of horse that they would use. These were different times. They would use professional basketball players playing horse against each other and broadcast it.

Okay. And he was known for all these crazy moves and so some of the stuff they're doing is just, okay. Like what kids would do where it's like, I'm gonna bounce this one off the ceiling after going around my legs. His were more like, you gotta go under the basket while putting the ball around your waist

and then throw it over your head and go in. They would be like, he could kind of talk it out and do it. Why isn't this part of the All-Star game? It should be. It would be way better than the Skills Challenge. I watched a little bit of the All-Star festivities this year. Yeah? Yeah, the Skills Challenge. I watched a little bit of the All-Star festivities this year. Yeah. Yeah, the Skills Challenge.

Even the game isn't that entertaining anymore. The dunk contest is okay, but there's that guy, Mac McClung, who's the guy that's in the G League that is actually not even in the NBA. He comes over and gets to be a part of it. But he's so much more creative in the way that he approaches his dunks. But then you've got these old heads who are judging it, and their judging is so completely bonkers. I don't think they can actually see what's happening

or know what's significant about the dunks. You really need to watch a dunk in slow motion and be like, oh, that's what he did, and that's why this is significant. But anyway. They need to watch a dunk in slow motion and be like, oh, that's what he did and that's why this is significant. But anyway. They need to play horse. I digress. Pete Maravich collapsed during a pickup game. He had that thing where you've got a hole in your heart

and you don't know about it. Oh. And so he's in great shape and had never experienced any problems. his last words were I feel great You laugh It's ironic. It's a joke. Well, I guess it wasn't a joke. It could have been a joke All right getting bored I'm getting no I just want you to pick some good ones Winston Churchill said I'm bored with it all No, I just want you to pick some good ones. Well, okay, okay.

Winston Churchill said, I'm bored with it all. Me too. I mean, these last words. Emily Dickinson. She had a lot of good words. Mm-hmm. She said, I must- A lot of pressure for a writer. I must go in for the fog is rising.

But she was already in. Wow. This is happening in a break. I must go in for the fog is rising. She's a somber lady. Yeah. James Brown. Here we go.

Now, he could say, I feel good. She's a somber lady. Yeah. James Brown. Here we go. Now he could say, I feel good. And that would have been better than Pistol Pete saying it. He said, I'm going away tonight. Oh, he's like Nostradamus. Hey! You got two more. Hey, I'm going away tonight! I got two more for you, Link. You know this one. Hey Hey I'm going away tonight

I got two more for you Link You know this one Steve Jobs Yep His last words were Oh wow Oh wow Oh wow

That's cool See I think he was On something I think he was On something I think he was seeing something I think he was seeing something And finally That's nice It's kind of like

Propelling you into the next phase Elvis Presley You heard of him? A little bit yeah Died on the toilet Which Is fitting Because his last words were, I'm going to the bathroom to read.

That's funny. Was he joking? No. And by read, he meant... He went to the bathroom to read and... Never came out. How's that make you feel? Do you feel like you have something to work with now?

I don't think anybody's gonna be quoting me. Well, with that attitude, of course not. You'll be gone. I didn't remember what I was gonna say. I mean, I forgot what I was gonna say is actually it would be pretty memorable and very much something the kind of thing you would say. Right.

I should've planned something for this moment. It was also good. Yeah. What are you gonna say? Oh, I haven't thought of it. I think I'm gonna wing it. No, you're not a winger. You're gonna plan it.

Come on. Oh, I'm not gonna plan it yet. I can't even come up with my mantra yet. I know you can't. All right, it's my rec, baby rec, baby one, two, three, four. I'm going to give you some music. When I was in New Zealand, I was like, you know, I'm going to listen to some Kiwi artists.

And I found a band. I don't know if it's just this vocalist, but she's got a very soothing voice. The band is called Tiny Ruins. And it's not that she has like a Kiwi accent or anything, but I just recommend it. It's really good, man. It's a good vibe. How would you describe it? Singer-songwriter, indie.

It was perfect for driving around the beautiful landscapes of the North Island, the pastoral nature of it all. So, yeah. Check out Tiny Ruins. It's a band. There's four of them. Me at the Museum, You in the Winter Garden is the most popular song of theirs. And I think you'll like it. A number of albums. Yeah, I think you'll

be into it. So check it out. Tiny Ruins. You'll like them. There you go. Thank you for spending some time with us. Hopefully we didn't depress you too much. Maybe you developed a plan for what you're going to say as your last words. In the meantime, remember that we want to hear from you via voicemail. Call our number. Let us know anything at all that you want to let us know. Any question that you have. Any comment that you have.

1-888-EARPOD-1. We'll speak at you next week. Hi, Brett and Link. I've been listening to you guys for a long time. Hi, Rhett and Link. I've been listening to you guys for a long time. And I was just listening to your most recent Ear Biscuits episode about where Rhett talks about how his anxiety is. And I just want to say I really appreciate how you guys talk so openly

about your mental health journey, especially when it comes to anxiety. And it means a lot to see two grown adult men somewhat successful that are still struggling with these issues is encouraging. So keep up the good work.