Erin is the Funny One - AnimeNIACS

Episode Date: November 1, 2021

After taking sips of a delicious, mustardy, 14.5% Sauvignon Blanc, Jack and Erin kick off episode 19 with the Anime quiz! Will Erin be able to spot the fake Anime titles? Listen to find out! Also, stay-tuned for some listener-submitted Horoscopes! Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

Welcome back listeners to the 19th episode of Aaron is the funny one I am Jack and you're Aaron. Hi. Thanks for letting me say my own voice So kind of you cool our 19th episode. What can you do when you're 19 years old? Oh, so much less than when you're 21 or 35. I don't think there's anything that you could do at 19 You know what it is honey. It's your last year as a teenager. Oh, that's true. That is true Also, you are one year older to looking Like you could pass for 21 and sure your fake ID may actually be legit Okay, but yeah, but you can't say things like that. Jack. Why would you say that? Wow? Stop being a bad influence

God we're bad Aunt and uncle right, but every family should have a night. I'd rather you do it in the house Every family needs a naughty aunt slash uncle That's what makes them fun. Nobody wants a boring aunt and uncle. Well, yeah, it's our 19th episode We got some fun stuff planned and once again, the hotline did save the day speaking of if you ever want to call in on our hotline We do have a hotline for the podcast call in on your phone like literally dial the number dad hug me 10 That's dad hug me 10. We're always looking for your quiz suggestions We're always looking for just fun little insights from you guys just stories whatever and also don't forget guest channeling

We have three guest channelers later on. Yes, we do. I nearly forgot about our guest channelers How could you forget? I don't know. I found a way though Honestly though, we are shells of what we once were because of how much channeling takes out of us guys You have no idea and so, you know, we're passing the torch in Summer specs and and just you know lightening the load you do it lightening the load So, yes, if you're ever feeling the inkling if you're like, oh, I know what a capricorn should do this week Etc. Etc. You let us know it dad hug me 10 or if you also have like a Libra in your life That is named Ben or you know, anybody that's ruined your life that you very much you went right to Ben

Very much You know, you got a death grip on that and you've talked to the gods and you know what their future looks like Please channel away send it our way. Did you know that anyone can channel, honey? I did and for the first episode of November the first episode of this Christmas season I would like to kick things off with wine of the week, but we do that every every week Shut up Aaron. We do that every week. All right, Jack. What have you picked for us this week, honey for this week's wine of the week I did my research and picked out what should be a fantastic sauvignon blanc 2018. No less. It's from Napa County It's a Marie Howard wine and it's a sauv blanc

And it's also 14 and a half percent and it's a Monday and you're trying to kill all of us Okay, I did neglect to mention that it's 14 and a half percent. I did not see this when I picked it out tonight It's the blindness. So don't shoot the messenger. I will also say if this wine doesn't even Register in the Vivino app like just isn't there has never been registered. However, I looked on their website It retails for $15, but the fact that it's 14 and a half percent Just like we talked about last episode Jack. This could turn out ugly for all of us Well in case it does give me a cheers and let's taste this 14 and a half percent sauvignon blanc from Marie Howard wines 2018 Napa County

As far as solve blonks go. It's fine. It's fine. Hey That's pretty good. I'm gonna this is gonna sound weird the aftertaste. It's a little Mustard-y, but I don't hate it because I like mustard, but there's a little bit of mustard. No, there's something there Listeners this one lingers if you're looking for a wine that lingers you could do much worse than Marie Howard wine sauvignon blanc It's fine 15 bucks. I'm gonna get you hella fucked up Yeah, and it sneaks up on you because I mean, I don't know first off This is a very good urine color. Like if you peed this you're a well hydrated. You got healthy urine Yeah, you got healthy stuff going in your guts. It's just so the lighter the lighter the wine

You'd think the lighter the alcohol content. We literally give a p-test to the wines. We're like, all right How healthy is this pee which is weird? I feel like we're the worst judges because yours is just like bright orange, you know I pee. Oh, yeah. Yeah, I drink about six ounces Legitimately drank less than 20 ounces of water close. It is not good every day I wake up and I say we're gonna do better today and every day. We don't do any Hydrating it's like the rabbit rabbit of hydration, but you know what? Oh my gosh get this I was listening to a podcast no less, but uh-huh most mornings. I listened to Preston and Steve

Which is a radio show a morning radio show in Philadelphia, but they record every daily episode and they upload it and Fortunately, I can pretend like I'm waking up with them every morning It's nice. It is nice and they were talking about an incident that happened with Howie Mandel where he had gotten a colonoscopy And then went to Starbucks after I don't know why but passed out at Starbucks Oh, God, but he was ordering like I don't remember but it was like a frappuccino or something Okay, and they were like what the hell why would you get a colonoscopy and then like you get a frappuccino What are you doing? Yeah, that sounds like a bad idea But it turns out that Howie Mandel or at least this is what they said on the podcast

They were like he doesn't really drink a whole lot of water and I was like, oh my god, that's me We're the same Howie Mandel isn't he kind of like a germaphobe kind of I think he totally is a germaphobe like notoriously So I would think like someone who's that germaphobe. It would be a bit of a health freak. I don't know like I do so you are assuming quite a bit. I am about Howie Mandel right now If you're gonna be a germaphobe drink a lot of water, I don't know flesh out those dangerous toxins Maybe he thinks the water is filled with toxins. He probably Right he probably lives in LA so he's like fuck. I don't even drink the tap water in LA

That should taste. Yeah, like it's got stuff. You don't do it's a well-known thing. You don't do that I won't even drink the water from the fridge. You won't the fridge filter. I'm like, nope. Nope. I can still taste it It's horrible. Even though I change it out every two years. Yeah, but Even when it's fresh, it's disgusting. You know in Philly We used to call that there's a river that runs through Philadelphia called the Schuylkill River And so we used to call the Philly tap water Schuylkill stew. That's I didn't know that that's disgusting Yet another reason why I'm never going back to Philly except for my tour coming up. I'll be in Philly December early December first get your tickets date is December 1st

Get your tickets at jacksfilmslive.com if you want to see me and Aaron you'll be at that show I will be there. I think my friends are gonna be there my college friends. Maybe even some high school friends Oh boy, I think my family Yeah, my family would probably be there And then my jacksfilms friends. I have a few jacksfilms friends that are gonna be there. We sure do so yeah It should be a good time. That's gonna be a lot of fun rip Roaring good time Oh, and then the following day is Silver Spring, Maryland. That's right. So all of my folks and family will be there And then the day after that is New York New York shows New York, New York

But I'm not going on that bus with you hell. No, no, that's fine I will need to figure out. Well, you'll swim down the Schuylkill, right? Yes I will need to figure out my transportation situation. Oh, you'll figure it out You got options and options, but yeah, hope to see you guys in one of a 25 cities I'll be at in the coming months Jack Do you feel bad for abandoning me for as long as you are I do and it bites at me. Do you actually I feel a little bad Yeah, of course I do. No, you don't I do because I know that you don't like being alone. I hate being alone I'm the worst at being alone, but that's a nice thing. You're never alone. You have three screaming barking dogs

They literally just we just had to pause the podcast because they had to make Sunday stop screaming at nothing But they don't talk they don't use their words They scream there. I've been asking for years now to use their words and they won't do it baby But yeah, so I am I had actually originally planned to join Jack on quite a bit of the tour. That's right and then my big girl corporate job I Love working for the man it became so much of an administrative burden and just like overall burden Yeah, that I just said never mind. Yeah, forget it. You will be there for at least four of the shows Yes, and that's just

2021 right. Oh, yeah, that's not included because in January we'll be back in the West Coast, you know I got an LA show. So yeah, yeah working for the man is fun. It is, you know, what else is fun There's 14 and a half percent savin y'all blah my goodness guys after we've recorded last week's episode and we had we had discussed How I think it was what 14.1% After we had done that This is what Jack. So Jack. No, you're gonna say whenever he gets drunk He is a motor mouth Talking talking talking talking talking and I think he had two glasses of wine. Yeah, that was it of the 14.1%

That's all it took and I Lord you would not stop talking. I was like, wow, I'm a talkative drunk You are at least I'm not like, you know an angry drunk. Well every now and then that rears its old head too Oh, wow, but put me on the shopping block But not last night last night was talking of Jack Was I even talking about just real quick? You were talking about Stefan's birthday. Oh hell. Yeah, sure. Sure Stefan the sushi dragon. Yes sushi dragon on Twitch Jack and Stefan used to live together and when Jack and I first started dating when I first moved to LA

Stefan was Jack's roommate. Stefan is the best. He is so sweet He is just awesome and just stupidly smart and talented. Yeah. Oh my I don't even watch this It's like third level fifth dimension. I can't even describe what he does on Twitch Everyone else is like playing video games and shit. No, no, no, this dude makes live music videos on Twitch But it's all done live. He has like 15 cameras. I'm probably like, you know low-balling it But he's got like 15 cameras just like set up in this warehouse He has all these buttons that he wears like on gloves and on his chest

He's got like a million like switch ups and just it's a show I can't even remember like what triangle does on the ps4 controller like no, you can't Meanwhile, this guy is just like he's making little mini electronic miracles every time he streams It's the coolest thing. It really is really fun and cool to watch. He's like found his fucking groove, man But so Jack was talking about Stefan's like making a post for Stefan's birthday Yeah, but the way you were talking about it like you were going on and on about it I was like, have you has Stefan never had a birthday before like what what why are we still talking about Stefan's birthday? It's been like stop. Wow, you sound like a real hater. Stop. Well, I love Stefan, but like it was like, bro

What's there to talk about? Look long story short. I get a little talky when I I drink heavy wines So there you go. Well, I can't wait for this 14 and a half percent to start doing its job then me neither Let's go. All right. So Jack film I heard a rumor yeah that you may have a test of sorts for me a squid game no less Who told some matter of fact? I do have a squid game for you and anyone else listening and playing along Please feel free to chime in jump in this quiz is for all of you and before I talk about my quiz It's a bit of an alteration

This quiz idea did come from one of you wonderful listeners who called in on our hotline at dad hug me 10 Let me play the message right now Hey, Aaron if you're listening to this give the phone to jack or give whatever advice you're listening to this to jack All right jack if you're listening now, it's not Aaron. It's actually jack I got your buddy quiz idea for you. So I came up with this after watching the latest gi I think it'd be fun for you to read these synopsis for different anime on netflix And also make some up and try to see if Aaron can guess whether they're real or fake Because you know the premises of some anime can be absolutely outrageous

So I think it'd be hilarious if you just like took say, I don't know 10 Real anime and grabbed their synopsis from netflix and then also made up 10 of your own to quiz Aaron on them And she would just have to guess if they were real or fake and uh, yeah, that's an idea for the quiz I hope you find it to be neat. Oh, by the way, it's called from maryland. So, yeah So caller from maryland I love that idea a lot and I did set out to do exactly what you suggested I looked up strange sounding anime series and their Descriptions and I jotted a whole bunch down

But then I kind of thought well gosh a lot of these anime shows just the titles alone are so strange Some of them are so wordy so specific and they sound like they went through google translate 20 times So I thought Screw the synopsis for this quiz Aaron. I got like 40 titles for you. I have a lot I'm gonna read the title of an anime show And you have to tell me if it's real or not Okay, this is such bullshit just the title Okay, so I will say that when I was preparing for last week's quiz

Coming up with real or fake titles or sequels or whatever one of my Methods was I would go through Like the hbo max all movies like I wanted to see everything they had right and then I thought like one of these movies Would seemingly have a sequel even if they didn't There's quite a bit of what And I know that my definition and my like characterization of anime might not actually fit the real definition of anime But there were a lot of like movies that I would think would fall into the category of anime that I was like I'm actually interested in watching that like what was the one that

Will remember the one that I watched and then I fell asleep during as I do Gonna have to be a bit more specific But it was like a little girl and there was a big giant bunny rabbit type my neighbor tutorial Yeah, I got like 20 minutes in and I fell asleep. Oh, I honey. I got like three minutes into that. Yeah I'm not done with it, but it looked adorable. Sure. Sure. So anyway guys I may be I may be turning a new leaf on the anime thing. We will see I don't know That would be incredible if you were if they say every seven years your bodies like cells like all change Like that. Uh-huh. Is this your metamorphosis?

Okay, wait, am I on a seventh year? I'm at I'm a 34. So no, but I'm in the middle of it It's happening in the middle of it. Maybe maybe all my body cells are changing. Wait. No, you're like, yeah Next year you're gonna be a new woman. Oh, yeah Guys, there you go. She got it Sorry, my math was off. I'm not gonna recognize you a year. I was thinking it was Oh, man, I'm so stupid. You're gonna like anime in a year. What is happening? You're gonna be a real weeb. I can't wait I have never once in my life looked at like anything anime and been even the slightest bit interested No, no, you did well randomly

I'm just looking at the titles of movies that hbo max has and I was like, oh that looks fun But didn't you say that it was like a ghibli thing studio ghibli? Yeah, which is like the disney of anime So maybe I you know what? Maybe I'm just a disney anime person. You probably are. Yeah The titles I will give to you today. Yeah, did you go to crunchy roll? I did go to crunchy roll. I thought you might Okay, we're going obscure. I I assume because I wanted weird fucking titles that just sounded Questionable. Okay, and boy did I find them. Okay, so it's not gonna be my neighbor to Toro that you know That sounds fine. I will say I would almost rather you give me the synopsis Not the titles, but maybe we can do that on another day at another time. No synopsis. Just titles boring

I had well, that's I really do these are like actually things that people watched. Yeah, sure I think some of them are more popular. Well, some of them, of course are more popular than others And I really did I have to say I did start this quiz jotting down a whole bunch of synopsis But then I kind of struggled like how could I write believable synopsis that were equally ridiculous? And so then I just went with the titles. I think it's gonna work. I think this quiz will work. All right. All right Okay, so erin. Yeah, is this title for an anime series real? Or did I make it up? It's bleach. It's bleach. Shit next question How did she know?

Okay, ready Why are you laughing stop laughing Rascal does not dream of bunny girl senpai. What is senpai? You will get no clarification from me. I also don't know Rascal, I think I think senpai is like a term of respect Okay, like almost like a mister. I'm not sure like mogwai Please mogwai a term of respect to gremlin. I know but was that a term of respect? I mean, we all love gizmo So yes, okay, um interesting workaround. I'm gonna say that is a real title Final answer. Yes. That is correct. Good job. Rascal does not dream of bunny girl senpai is real next time

I ask you what senpai means and you say you don't know I mean like then you can't use that in a title. Yeah, I can It's my quiz and I did for the record quick synopsis. I believe it's about a boy a high school boy Who who can who all of a sudden? He's the only one who can see this girl dressed in like a playboy bunny outfit and only he can see her That is a wet dream That is a wet dream as you'll find out. That's a lot of anime That that is nothing but a wet dream. That's all right. Oh my god ready for some more wet dreams, honey

This is horrible. Okay, honey. Is this real to make it up that time? I got reincarnated as a slime I am going to say that is real correct. That's also a real show the only reason why I guessed was because In stardew valley, they have slimes I've never understood in stardew valley like what the fuck the slimes actually do I believe the slimes are a uh reference to the popular gaming franchise dragon quest Which is a very like anime Style video game series. It is. Yeah, and they look like little droplets and they they smile. That's a slime Those slimes are bad. Oh in stardew valley. I think they're bad in dragon quest too. I think you fight them

I think I don't know in stardew valley The best way I could describe them is maybe like the little creatures in pac-man got you. Okay The ghosts or the pac-man themselves the ghosts. Okay mixed with the pac-man. So like if they were to have a baby That's what would you know happened. Oh, yeah next up. Is this real or they make it up? Listen to me girls I am your father Is that a real title or a fake title Listen to me girls. I am your father. That would be that's like In the 60s. They had this show like my mother the car. Oh, yeah, I know you right

And it was like an actual I think their mom like had passed away and then she came back as a car And she makes all these fucking like jokes and car puns. Yeah, she lives in the garage. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah Why do I feel like this show would be equally as boring as that? I'm gonna say that's not a real show Okay, final answer final answer. No, it's real. It's a real show. Listen to me girls. I am your father. What is oh my god I did not write a synopsis for that Dad knows best. That's what I don't think the dad's a car Maybe that's what like the translation was is that like father knows best father knows best

Because that's a no, that's a really you got to remember that too for the rest of this quiz because some of these sentences Sound crazy. Okay. Next up. Is this real or did I make it up after being rejected? I shaved and took in a high school runaway. Is that a real title for an anime series? Or did I just make that up? I'll repeat after being rejected I shaved and took in a high school runaway. That is not a real title final answer final answer. It's real What What could that possibly I did some deep digging How does crunchy roll work? Is there okay? I'll tell you are there ratings

Do people like get to rate like like the way netflix used to be like 4.8 out of 5 stars Ever like do people get to rate these shows like is that an actually good show crunchy roll is an enigma And I'll tell like as I'm speaking it from I'm speaking as someone who has done Many many crunchy roll sponsors on my youtube channel over the years It is an enigma in that I went to crunchyroll.com went to the anime tab or series slash show tab Whatever and they're not in any order. You just see a grid You just see a big grid of anime You can just keep scrolling down like just like tiles of posters and stuff for anime shows

you hover over it you get the full title and text of course one of those and It's just it's one of those like, you know show more click it a bunch more up here scroll down show more boom I did this for like hours and I never ran out of anime Eren and they're not alphabetically listed There's no ranking system that I could see maybe it's like popularity Maybe they start with like, you know the 20 most popular at the time anime series I feel like they probably do that like you got your fucking, you know a dragon ball Super uh blah blah blah super. Thank you. I knew you'd do that. Uh, et cetera Uh, yeah your top, you know 10 20 30 anime at the top. But then like you just keep going you'll keep finding anime and there's no rhyme or reason

It's not chronologically listed like it's it's an enigma and I just kept going and drawed it down names that were like, huh That's funny. That shouldn't be a show. Let's write it down. Well, it's not that it should be a show It is probably better Titled it would be no it should some of these I will read out and you will be like that shouldn't be a show You mean like the guy that can see the girl in the playboy bunny No, that should be a show And I I want to binge that one. All right, so I believe you're two for four so far. Let's keep going Okay, next up. Is this real? Are we actually keeping track? Not really. Okay. I'm keeping track for the first like as long as my you know

14 and a half percent, uh, you know alcohol brain can here's question five I want to eat your pancreas. Is that real didn't make it up? You made it up. That's real It's a real show called I want to eat your pancreas guys the pancreas is a very important organ You can't just eat it. Okay. Can't believe you thought I made that up. You can't you can't live without the pancreas You need the pancreas. You need it. I'm honored that you think I'm that clever to think of such an obscure title All right, next up two for five. All right. Here's question number six listeners How are you doing call us on the hotline at dad hug me 10? Let us know no don't I don't want to know I do just because I showed you my panties

Doesn't mean I love you. Ew. No off. No. No. No not real not real and even if it is it's not In my universe in my mind that show does not exist Regardless of the actual answer. No Are you sure? Yes sure. Yes. I'm sure you don't want to change your answer. No Is that your final answer? It's my final answer just because I showed you my panties doesn't mean I love you I'd prefer if you didn't repeat it. Thank you. You're correct. I made that up first off The fact that that was the one that you came up with as you like you're disgusting. What the fuck is going on in your brain You're disgusting. Here's the thing. I'm not disgusting. You're disgusting. It's anime. That's disgusting. No, you're disgusting

All right, congrats. Thank you. You got my first fake title. Yay after many tries next up Is this a real show or is it a false show false show the legend of the legendary heroes? Yeah, that's real final answer final answer. Good job. It is. Thank you. It's a real show great show Yeah, you love that. I love the legend of the legendary heroes. Aaron. Yes real me this Okay, the way of the house husband Oh my goodness, that's a dream come true. I Aspire to be a house husband. Don't we all what was it again the way of the way of the house husband? Um No, I'm gonna say no

I don't think house husband is like a common place enough like phrasing house husband Sure, sure because like I feel that we usually use the term stay at home Yeah, okay for house husband or house wife. We now use stay at home. We do don't we person like that's my That's my actual goals to be a stay at home person. Yeah, I don't want to be a stay at home wife Because fuck you I don't want to be a stay at home mom because also fuck kids I don't want to be a stay at home husband because again, fuck you I aspire to be a stay at home person Where I just be a person and stay at home

So this might sound good. It sounds amazing. Um, so anyway back to the question at hand I'm going to say nay. Okay. That is a false false show. Is that your final answer final answer? No, it's real I did not make that up Check out the way of the house husband I think I would like vibe with that show the way of the house husband I'm like, I think we might be on the same page here. This is one of the few synopsis that I do recall Yeah, it's about a former yakuza member. Do you know that? No? Yeah, uh the yakuza yakuza It's the japanese mafia. Oh, yeah, we've got a lot in common. Okay

And but he has since abandoned his uh mafia like ways and is um devoted to being a YouTuber fiercely loving your husband to his wife. Oh, yeah. Oh that too. Okay the way of the house husband I think it's been a company loving youtuber and husband. It's like the sopranos. I don't know. I haven't seen it Next up I still think I'd vibe with that show. Yeah, we should give it a shot. Okay, right after we watch Just because I showed you my panties doesn't mean I Stop it. Don't ever say the p word to me ever again. Okay And next up honey, is this real or am I making it up my mother the forever raging demon door?

My mom's highway to hell or something my mom is like the gateway to hell like the talking car Yeah, my mother the gateway to hell Gateway like what is that like what could that have been translated from right my mother is the gateway to hell My mother the devil my mother the river sticks. Oh, listen to you river sticks I'm going to say no, that's not a real show final answer final answer. Correct. I made it up donna would never How dare you think that your mother Is the what highway to hell gateway to hell or some shit doorway to hell No, it's just so many of these titles sound like that my mother the forever raging demon door

It's like but it's like ever raging demon, but it's like literal It's like, oh no, my mom turned into a door possessed by demons, you know, like that's literally like that's not Apologize to donna right now. No, because I have nothing to apologize for this isn't an attack on my mother Even though that's what came into your mind when you stop calling her donna her name to you is mrs. Douglas Next up bo bo bo bo bo bo bo not bo bo. No, I'll repeat bo bo bo bo bo bo Is that a real show? Did I make it up? It's a real show. It is a real show. Good job And it's funny because there I would show you but it would give away like what future answers are Okay, they're like dashes. So it's like somewhere. It's literally bo bo bo

But like some some of them have dashes some have spaces hilarious Morse code. Yeah, it's supposed to be a very absurdist Anime cute. Yeah next up. Is this real or am I making it up? And you thought there is never a girl online That's a real show final answer final answer. How are you so certain? Um, and you thought there is never a girl online. I don't know. I feel it in my fingers I feel it in my toes Christmas is all around you. Christmas is all around me. So the feeling grows So final answer real show. I hate to say it, but you're right. Yeah, that's a real show It was in my fingers in my toes. Look at that. It was in my fingers in my toes. Good job, baby. Thank you Next up my creepy uncle

Let me finish My creepy uncle is taking pictures of me in the shower Oh No, no, it better not be better not be it better not be I don't even want to know about it. If it is I I don't I know no no Is that your final answer final answer? Correct. I did make that one up What is wrong with your brain because anime is hella pervy sometimes is wrong with your brain sometimes I mean like 95% of the time you take it to that

If you know you know fifth gear the fifth gear that like it doesn't need to go to don't fucking shame me Don't creepy uncle. Shame. Oh my god. I know I'm right next up honey. Yeah, is this real? Or did I make it up handsome the prince king prince king? Prince king Handsome the prince king. Okay. I'm going to say yes Because why if it's not I want it to be a real show Because that sounds like a show I could get into That is the beauty and the beast meets lifetime movie anime that this girl needs in her life

Is that your final answer final answer? No, I made it up. No, I was really looking forward to handsome prince king There is no such show as handsome the prince king, but the prince king is Now I have a hole in my heart that can't be filled I was really looking forward to handsome the prince king. Oh, I'm sorry, babe. No, I made it up. No such thing Next up redeem yourself. Here we go. I have a few more and by a few more. I mean a few dozen more tokyo revengers Tokyo revengers. Yes, it's real. It's real. It sounds like avengers, but it's revengers and I'm here for it Girl you right Do you know like what characters star in tokyo revengers? No, is it mario and luigi?

No, but I think I remember the if I recall correctly the synopsis of this particular show that is real Is that uh, this guy an ex-girlfriend of his gets murdered by uh, some um, gang members or the Japanese mafia What is with the mafia? And so then he somehow magically uh, transports himself back 12 years ago and he gets to like Relive everything so he gets he like he builds a little team and His mission is to get revenge on the people that killed his ex-girlfriend. So it's john wick with a team and time travel Oh, yeah, it's john wick four. Don't leak john wick four. Honestly if john wick four is time travel I'll see that shit in theaters never seen a john wick in theaters always saw it like well after the hype I think I always saw the first john wick. Um, it's fun. I know second one's good too. I know I saw it third one's me

When did you see the third one on a plane somewhere? Oh, you know what? I saw the third one on a plane and it like censored one of the best kills You know how planes do that? No, I remember watching the kingsmen and they censored they heavily censored like the greatest Gunfight in the kingsmen. No because I saw kingsmen in theaters. I never watched it on an airplane. Okay. You know the linard skinner Church kill scene in the kingsmen. Yeah, I did not know that it was that ridiculous and epic and crazy And the plane version of that church Fight scene in the kingsmen the first one was heavily heavily heavily truncated edited and censored

Well, you could have been sitting next to a child jack I could have I could have then I rewatched it on like youtube years and years later and my my jaw fell to the floor It was one of the most impressive scenes i've ever seen in cinema And it was robbed of me because I saw the safe for plane flights version of it And I'll never forgive southwest air. I don't know what I was on. Hey guys guys. Don't say it. I would like to don't say it welcome you To since we just talked about it Hi the doorway to hell

Which is jack film has officially crossed over it me And he is now drunk and he can't stop talking It's because someone had to get 14 and a half percent I didn't pick it you picked it honey Is this anime Real or not real dear lord Problem children are coming from another world aren't they? It's real

Are you sure the only thing that makes me think it's not real is the aren't they at the end? Uh-huh, so if it's not real it's because of that But i'm gonna say it's real because problem children are coming from another world Mars attacks, bitch. You're right. It's real it is. Yeah, that's a real show aren't they That's the surprising part aren't they like as if asking for validation Because I don't know where that would have been translated from like what like we agree like almost like we agree Right, right. I don't know where that would have come from But I don't know i'm not an expert

But problem children do come from you know other worlds and stuff that they do so, you know, I understand it Well, do you understand is it a documentary? I think it's a lot like march of the penguins. It's a documentary. It's a documentary Yeah, is it also narrated by morgan freeman? Yes, huh, but he speaks fluent japanese Huh a man of many talents. He really is he's a treasure. Yeah protect him at all costs honey real or not real All right death march to the parallel world rhapsody rhapsody is a word I can be confident I have never used outside of bohemian rhapsody same rhapsody. I don't even know what rhapsody is It's a type of like music composition, right? Like the song of sorts like a sonata. What is it? Sonata, is that what you're trying to say? Sonata, and I thought I was drunk. Oh come on. I just don't know music

Okay, let me think death march to the parallel world rhapsody real real. It's real. It's real final answer final answer You are correct Good job, baby the word rhapsody. I don't know. I don't know rhapsody is a very random I don't have anything to add to that one, but I do have one after that don't trust the pillows They talk too much. Oh, they do talk too much. I know my pillows for sure talk too much They all night long all day all day and all night No during the day, that's why it's annoying because during the day they're like I am I'm tired

But at night time they're like, oh my god. Did you hear it? Did you hear it? Did you hear it? No, honey, you're getting yourself mixed up with the pillows. That's what you fucking do at night at 1 a.m. You light up I do. It's something listeners. It's the fucking worst. It's hormonal. I don't know how to explain it I just come alive. You get your second wind at 1 a.m. And and this boy is just trying to sleep I don't know. I can't explain it. It just it just it just happens. I could be tired literally all day And a 1 a.m. hits and I'm just like bam. I could like run a marathon right now Pillows don't trust the pillows. They talk too much. They share your secrets I'm gonna say yeah, I'm gonna say yes. Yes. That's a real one. That's a real one. Yeah, yeah

Final answer because I could see the show being about like dreams Coming to life and then the pillows absorb it and they tell all your secrets Yeah, uh, yes final answer. No, I made that one up doesn't exist Oh, I actually why do you keep making up ones that I played I wanted to watch that though Because it I put a lot of thought into making these up and trying to make them sound believable But also a little crazy. It's a delicate balance. For example, this next one My roommate is a cat. Did I make that up? Or is it a real show? My roommate is a car No, my mom

Um My roommate is a cat I like to put him in my trunk It's almost it's almost so simple that I think you've made it up But it's just simple enough that I'm like, yeah, I could see a show being about a roommate being a cat Uh, this is very Salem in Sabrina the teenage witch. This is very John Kerry of you a.k.a You're really flip-flopping. We need a solid answer. What did you just say? John Kerry? Yeah, you realize that like most of the people listening like have no idea who that is. That's why I threw him in Wow way to date yourself. I know I love doing that 2004 presidential election. I love dating myself. I'm wonderful

Um, I'm gonna say yes, it's a real show. It is real. Good job. Good for you. Can we watch that one? Yeah, let's watch my room. Is it like Salem where like the cat is spicy and has a talking Salem There's no there are no witches. It's just Salem And it just makes cracks and puns of the camera for 30 minutes come for viewing that is come for viewing While I go to sleep at night is Sabrina the teenage witch. I've been doing it since college. It's amazing She'll just put on Sabrina the teenage witch reruns not the netflix Sabrina No, the hulu Sabrina the teenage witch with Melissa jones heart. Yeah, that's the Melissa jones heart Sabrina It's kind of infuriating honestly if you like listen for it and pay attention to it

It's infuriating in that the laugh track plays every 15. No five seconds It's it's obscene, but it's so innocent and adorable It's such comfort viewing like love love Sabrina the teenage witch I'm hungry It's it's like oh my god. Don't be a hater incessant next up honey. Is this real or am I making it up the slime diaries? The slime diaries Uh, uh, uh, hurry hurry. It's real. It's real. It's real final answer final answer. It's real. Let's watch that show You're killing it. It's like it started valley

I have a slime pot where I'm like growing slimes and one of them has figured out how to grow hands And write in a diary and like I would love love to watch that How about this next one? Is this real or is it fake the smartest baker gets no treats today? Um, that's real final answer. Yes, but if I were a smart baker, I would well Well, I'd probably alternate days on days. I get treats because you can't treat yourself every day. You can't that's otherwise It's not a treat. So that's a real show. It's not you're wrong. I made it up wait But now I feel bad. No, sorry. There's no smartest baker like why do I attach myself to the one like Why do I attach myself to these where I'm like now? I'm envisioning the baker all because that's how I have to play my game

I'm envisioning, you know, I only have a few dozen more Okay, ready. We're not gonna do a few dozen more by the way my teen romantic comedy snafu No, and the reason I say that is because snafu is actually an acronym for Um, something like fucked up beyond it's like scuba. It's it's like spoo bar. Yeah, it's like fucked up beyond all recognition Oh, it is. Okay. Snafu is like I don't know what it stands for but I can imagine it being similar to I think the fu in snafu stands for fucked up So so I do not believe that a translation Would translate to snafu. I think it's like a military word or something. That's actually really good to doctor reasoning sweetheart

But you're wrong. It's actually, uh, um, it's a real show. Maybe I'm mixing it up with foobar How about this one? My closet goblin has a face. No, not a real show. You're right. I made that one up Goblin is my favorite word. It's fun. It's such a fun word. Right. It's such a fun word. It's a fun word There you go. No, I don't think so if you hear goblin, you know, I made it up. Yeah, yuri on ice Yes, that's real it is real. Yeah Next up the quintessential quintuplets. Yes, that's real. Yes, it is. Good job. We have got to spend more time on crunchy Oh Oh, yeah, I would like to spend more time on crunchy roll

Erin I'll do that the only bad part about it is that if I fall asleep Which is often unless it's dubbed like I won't know what's actually going on. They probably have dubs I think they have dubs. Okay. Oh my god. Did this podcast just turn into an ad for crunchy roll? I did not sponsor new title for you every time I sneeze. I turn into a haunted fox. That's real. No, I made it up. You're wrong Oh Once again, I was really looking forward to that fox ghost, but it's it's it's you know, it's a trope Is it wrong to try to pick up girls in a dungeon? Yes

Not what I asked though That's rhetorical sweetheart Is is it wrong to try to pick up girls in the dungeon a real show or did I make it up? That's real. It is real. Good job Wow, what the fuck is that show I'm telling you animes fucked up next up. What the fuck is that show about you think that's messed up? Wait, you'll hear the next 40. Here you go. You can't we mustn't oh well. Wait. No, that sounds familiar No, you know what? I think I'm confusing that with um insects in the city when carry is dumped by a post-it note and He leaves a post it that's yeah, what does it say? What is it? I can't I'm sorry. Don't hate me

That's what I think I'm confusing it with right now. What is it? We can't it's um, you can't you can't we mustn't we mustn't Oh, well. Oh well. I can't I'm sorry. Don't hate me. Um, I'm gonna say Yes, that's a real anime and also if you haven't watched sex in the city great show holds up Definitely holds up love sex in the city also would come for a few pre reboot before they kick off, you know the good one She was great. Uh, no, I made that up. It's not real. No such thing Were you thinking of sex in the city to post it? No, I think it was more like you're perfect I love you now change or something like that. I feel like that's the thing. I don't know. Okay. Next up I feel like that's what you tell me all the time

High school prodigies have it easy even in another world. Yes, that's real. It is real. Good job. That's the point My first girlfriend is a gal Did I make that up? Is it real? It's fake. No, that's real What that doesn't even make sense. It doesn't but it's real if it's for my daughter I'd even defeat a demon lord. Is that real to make it up? No, that's made up. No, that's real It's a real show. I was surprised by the the usage of defeat that I was like, okay I don't I don't think that that's how that would be worded like I think it'd be like I'd even fight Yeah, sure. How do you know if you defeat them? Right? You haven't done it yet

So you can't say you would defeat them. You don't know you don't know you don't know that demon lord You don't know the demon lord don't act like you know the demon lord. I love the term demon lord It's so very precise. It's like it's not a demon, but a demon lord No daily mail always makes up like stupid like phrases for certain things like they have a They have an obsession with the word or I guess words but word phrasing of love rival love rival Love love love rival and it's like that's not a thing. It's not a thing. Demon lord love rival tomato tomato You know, it's all the same. It's all daily mail. So they they do like that's the thing anime does have like a weird Not weird, but they do have kind of like an obsession with not just like demons, but like hierarchies of demons

It's actually kind of fun. I quite like it's not the pink dragon from shrek It's a series of pink to red to black They're classes to gold. There's not like gold is the worst. They're a lot of like in anime There's a lot of like tournaments and a lot of rankings. They're like like you may have defeated me Like mario, but can you defeat general me like you know? Yeah, like mario. Yeah, sure. Yeah, I'm not getting through to you Why the hell are you here teacher? Is that real or did I make it up? You made it up? No, it's real Wait, but they can't say the word hell, but they did it's in the title h e double hockey sticks in the title erin Oh my gosh, here redeem yourself. Here's a new one for you. Okay. Did I make it up? Is it real?

I can't understand what my husband is saying That's real. It is real But is this one real it's a documentary actually Yeah, I'll bet yeah, I was waiting for you to make some snarky comment Like but I can't understand where my hands meet me next title I'd rather die than date you But I'll take my chances chances of dying or chances of dating It's not explained. It's real. It's fake. I made it up. What the heck

Well, so you tell me because I'm that good. Tell me chances of dying or chances of dating We actually are we do only have like about 11 more. So here we go only 11 more. Wow. Okay, don't worry, honey Is this real or is this not real? You never answered the question by the way No, I thought it was rhetorical not world end. What do you do at the end of the world? Are you busy? Will you save us? It's real. It is real. Good job But is this one real I'm being harassed by the sexiest man of the year. No, not real What? We put that on the list. Yeah, oh my gosh

Do you love your mom and her two hit multi target attacks? That's real because it's way too fucking random and you're correct. It is real. I had to include it I knew you get it target attacks. I don't even know what that means It's about I think a mother and her son get transported to a video game world And the son is uh flummoxed and flabbergasted at the fact that his own mother is better at video games than he is Oh That's as far as I got in the synopsis. How about this one? Okay. Is that a wand in your pocket? Or are you just happy to see me wizard king that better not be fucking real

It better not be real. So even if it is once again, it better not be are you saying it's real or not real? It's not real. It's not real. I made it up. What is wrong with your like honestly We need to like therapy like what and there's a dash between wizard and king I just so listeners can like envision how I phrase that one What possibly could we do to help the wizard king at this point next up honey fake or not fake takashi? Are you sure you're a clock real? Real times the thousand I'm very happy with that because it was super absurdist next up help my mistress is a satanic volleyball fake fake

Good job. I made that one up next up only five left My mental choices are completely interfering with my school romantic comedy real real next up We have honest. I mean it. We have got to spend more time on crunchy roll You know what we should play crunchy roll roulette where we just we close our eyes We scroll down the web page remove the cursor around and we go that one. Yes. I'm in I'm in Yeah, it's gonna be a lot of it. Oh, don't do that. That's what anime. It doesn't no no No, that's what your gross perverted. No, no, no, that's the thing virtually every anime. No has someone going no No, I don't remember that from spirited away. That was a fucking studio ghibli movie

Anyway, next up sword chasers bashings of the summer shield real nope made it up Bastion's a good word. Thank you. That's what it's going for like super random. Shit that doesn't mean what's a summer shield Yeah, thank you next up. I'm standing on a million lives Real good job real two more final two miss vampire who lives in my neighborhood real real Yeah, I want to watch that one. Let's go and here's the last one My love life is a wreck and I'm never not naked not real Is that your final answer for the final question final question? My reasoning is is that you are a pervert

Right and naturally you come up with these fake titles with perverted titles Somebody being naked in the neighborhood all the time. That's not real. You're disgusting fake Congratulations, you're correct. It's fake. I made it up. We need to get you some therapy Perhaps better help Like a sap. All right Congratulations, honey. You you passed my merry little uh, well, I don't know if you passed actually I've not I've not been keeping track But thank you for taking my merry little quiz. Yeah, it was awesome. I did amazing

I won and by the way, I can't wait to like hang out on crunchy roll. Honestly. It's a date Let's go to crunchy roll and just like just we'll play crunchy roll roulette. We'll shuffle around the cursor. No, you know We'll reload the uh load more button about 18 times so that we have a nice breathy collection of anime new and old known and unknown obscure and relevant Jack you're drunk. Stop talking. Good and bad I've had enough of this quiz honey. It's time for something. Do you know what time it is? It's time to get you a glass of water No, because you can't stop speaking because you're so drunk. That's not it. What else could it be? Why it's

horoscope season Okay, it's not horoscope time. It's horoscope season Right. There's a whole season for horoscope. Even though the whole year is horoscope season Are you just going to surgically pick at all of my words and sentences? I mean it you said it's horoscope season as though it's a season But the horoscopes last all year long jack. But right now it's horoscopes. Horoscope season Hi, cup of tea. It's horcrux season I need you to like start actually looking at labels when you buy the wine. Oh, that's no fun

Otherwise, I'm not gonna let you go in there alone anymore. I just pick him if the label's pretty. Yeah, I know I know that's the problem. I'm gonna need you to get it together. Okay. This labels look pretty All right guys. Well starting us off with again scorpio season our second episode of scorpio season We have a guest channeler. Is that right? That's right. That's right This scorpio horoscope is going to be read to us by laura. Thank you, laura Scorpio, hello, because it's finally here. It's our time to shine as the designated spooky zodiac leaders wish they could be us as they are the back to school season Sodiak

Okay, so your horoscope see that's ludo is our ruling planet this week. You will experience wait. What what's that? Uh, I'm getting word that ludo is no longer a planet. When did that happen? 2006 Who decided ludo wasn't a planet nasa? What did they know? Well, if nasa told you to jump off a cliff, would you do that? No, you wouldn't, you know This is actually conspiracy because scorpio was such a strong zodiac and our power was so great that science decided to take our power away That's right. They took it away. So now our planet is mars. Okay, whatever. I'm not bitter

Scorpios can't forgive Anyway, going back to your horoscope your horoscope with mars It is that your girl boss side business will have its most profitable year Yes, provided that any time as someone asked you a question this week your response will be pluto is a planet Pluto is a planet Say it even if it isn't the question. All right. Take care. This is I have to say laura you did an eerily good job mimicking erin's like cadence

Delivery my cadence what you would like right? Yeah, I feel like that's yeah, it's there's an equal. I'm here You don't think that we read them the same just the whole what's that pluto hasn't been to planet since 2006 That's only because that's you. That's you. That's only because 95 percent of the day. I go. What was that? You do james you reference this tick talk like it's the funniest thing in the world It's a wendy williams clip and it's like that's what she said. What was that she's obsessed with this clip Yeah, I said, you know because I I'm I'm it's funny every time. I'm stuck talking to myself all day So this is just a phrase that I repeat to myself all day long. Well good on laura. That was a solid laura You know what really appreciate you supporting the scorpios because they need your support because nobody else gives a shit about them

Wow Didn't have to go that hard, but okay such Now this is exciting. Oh, we have a special guest In the studio today here and it's none other than can I get a drum roll? incel andi

I think it would be a real treat if this infamous tweeter. Yeah read this next horoscope incel andi The floor is yours. Let's go. No No I'm not reading this Everyone knows horoscopes are just racism for women. That's right. And by the way The title erin is the funny one. Yeah, that's what I incel andi call

anoxymoron The only time I ever found A woman funny. Yeah was when my mother suggested I move out of her basement Sorry, I'm in a foul mood. Oh, what's up? I held a door open for a grill today. Uh-huh And she didn't even sleep with me. What? What a bitch Girls only want chads Never andi's

Screw this I'm going back to 410 and treating sob stories With all my best friends. We can't have women, but we fellow incels do have each other. That's right Get red peeled And be lonely with us There it goes. Wow What a Gem that incel andi. I'm he's a charmer. I gotta tell you

I was pleasantly surprised at how charming and just charismatic he was very very for an incel very ted bundy Any ladies out there want to turn incel andi into just Andi That's by the way, that's slurp you keep doing. That's my panties. That's like my that's my that's my creep crypt tonight Good. It's my creep tonight That's a good pun though. No, it's not. No, it's not Capricorn guys, it's hard for me to be channeling at a time like this I'm I'm very distracted at the moment because in just a few days

I will be abandoning my insecure attachment style life to go on tour How dare you? I know while i'm so excited to see all of you guys that are coming to my shows I can't help but feel guilty for leaving my poor Insecure wife alone at home to take care of our three dogs all on our own That's quite the outnumbering. So I understand why you might feel that guilt We've been going to the gym together because she doesn't like to go alone And now she's going to have to go alone Huh?

The whole point of the class is that you wear a heart rate monitor And so she won't even be able to hide the fact that she's super nervous being there by herself because her heart rate Monitor is going to knock her out so hard. Yeah, I know. Why are you telling me this? I don't know She's already had a number of awkward conversations Hand encounters with the trainers there when they try to talk to her But she's like out of breath or like her mouth is dry So when she opens up her mouth to talk it creates like a little spit bubble thing

Which is so embarrassing What if that happens again and she doesn't have a buddy to rely on? Oh, man. Just thinking about this makes me so nervous for her. Yeah, me too Your horoscope for this week is to go to the gym with my wife because she needs a gym buddy While i'm gone guys, if you want to come to the gym with me, I would very much appreciate it because I need a buddy This next horoscope is being channeled by our friend Gabe. Hi Gabe for aquarius Aquarius all right, aquarius today's your big day. You finally got a guest on the podcast now Unfortunately, they can't be in the podcast. So we've got them over at a zoom call. Let's give it up to the very famous mr.

Peter Griffin Hey, hey aquarius. I've got your horoscope for you now You know, it's in the basement, right? You you've got the money Listen, you've got the code for the safe. Yes Yes, you don't have the code. What what do you mean? But listen, I'll give it to you really quick The code is Oh my god, holy crap. That's the lowest Listen, you know what to do. Uh, I gotta go. Oh wow, honest, which is he can't uh

Well, it looks like he had some sort of instructions for you. Uh, you look great today. Nice job aquarius Keep on keeping on. Uh, sorry about that. I'm sorry. Did peter griffin say louis? No, peter would never say I heard louis Hey, louis you're drunk jack shut up. I heard louis jack. You're drunk Holy crap louis Pisces, did you see the trailer for that new batman video that came out recently? That robert patinson he is one very spicy I mean my personal preference is that he glitter shirtless in the sun

But i'll watch any movie with him shirtless Anyway, the reason I bring this up is because one I can't stop thinking about robert patinson shirtless Two I think we all know i'm a team advert type of fella And three because you're going to have a very spicy mi tibana of a week pisces Wait, did I say of a week? Sorry. I meant this week. You're going to have a very spicy meatball This week. It's gonna be okay. Maybe you'll spring for two. Who knows the world's your oyster Also, I can't get enough of that glittery shirtless robert patinson batman. Hey real man. We're body glitter. Agreed. Agreed I unironically I saw the trailer. Yeah, I'm amped. I'd see that movie. Look good. Look good

It was okay as soon as I know it didn't look okay to you as soon as I played it for you and as soon as it ended You said that looks stupid. It looks like it was like, yeah I'm very neutral to every batman that isn't christian bail. So what you didn't even like those movies though No, but I thought he did really good. I know I thought he did a really good job I thought he played a good batman everybody else. I'm like, I feel like they're playing batman if that makes sense Sure, I get that so christian bail was the one that i'm like, no, that's batman everybody else is playing batman I like robber patinson's though in the trailer because he looks very unhinged and crazy and uh, I welcome that I feel like uh, batman would be unhinged and crazy and angry just always angry but enough about batman

Your next job interview will not go well You will be asked what your greatest weakness is And you will answer far too quickly and loudly And you don't just say one weakness you list at least 20 Oh, no in alphabetical order. Thanks. One of them is hate's work Another is wine's often yet another is I don't do emails Another weakness is rejects the idea of hygiene Another is day long morning breath

Another is meat sweats another is Perpetually horny. Oh no, what is wrong with you? Honestly, what is wrong with your brain? Let's take them to the script. Oh my god always something Oh, is that how I ended it? You need to like go to church or something jack. Oh my gosh. Yeah, one of these days Taurus whoa, this has never happened before. What is this feeling so sudden and new? Instead of a horoscope for you, I'm getting a prediction for the future world. Oh my I'm a regular Notre Dame person But not the hunchback the other one. No, no, not the maiden lady the Notre Dame guy

You know the one. Holy crap. I see I see Oh, I don't know if the world is ready for this prediction This will change the shape of our futures forever from she laid china from bolivia to belgravia The christmas baking contest capital of the world from sea to shining sea. This will Change everything if a movie were ever made about my prediction It would need to start dwayne the rock johnson because this would be such an epic tale Is the world ready for this? I'm conflicted. I'm between a I'm between a dwayne the rock johnson and a hard place on this one nice

But I can't keep it to myself It would be a disgrace to humanity to rob you of the answers to our collective futures Okay, I'll share it but beware. We mustn't treat this information lightly. Are you ready? Okay, my prediction is The chocho sema will win dancing with the stars Oh Sweetheart, I don't know if the world's ready for that. Shit. I don't think they are I feel really like tingly and shit like in my as you should throughout throughout as you should every nerve

And like all 60,000 miles of like nerves and blood vessels in my body are on fire Yeah, I feel that I feel like I just said like a truth a real like like a forbidden truth That shouldn't be shared with the world. You know what I'm talking about. I do I do I do like the meaning of life kind of shit All right mark our words if she wins guys you come back to this podcast We called it and it's gonna be the tale of jojo siwa winning dancing with the stars Starring dwayne the rock johnson. I love being in between a dwayne the rock johnson and a hard play you would Chip and I you will get in a twitter fight with a popular tiktoker named randy roblox Over whether or not the new batman looks good

And we all know jack film thinks it looks good Obviously randy roblox and his millions of followers will overpower you on social media Flooding your mentions and dms You'll actually trend for an hour under the hashtag Batman cuck as your haters will learn to call you. It's a terrible hashtag. You always wanted fame But at what cost the monkey's paw curls an uncaring finger wants more batman cuck If i'm being honest, I never care for randy roblox. That might be a hot take I know a lot of people follow randy roblox on twitch and oh my god tiktok tiktok cancer

So halloween is over and the big boy holidays haven't begun yet We're in that weird in-betweeny period the doldrums of the year It's easy to feel lost and insecure during these trying times But fret not I have the perfect cure. What's that to your november blues starting november 8th My I hate you my hubby jack film is going on tour across 19 states and 25 cities Oh, yeah, don't worry. He's not doing stand-up or anything like that It's a live interactive game show where anyone with a phone can compete to see who is the funniest It's the best kind of cringe

Come play with us. Yes, I'll be there for some of the east coast shows and get your tickets today At jacksfilmslive.com charge your phones. Wow, that is the worst kind of cringe jack film I know I know all of that self promotion. There's a lot of self promotion, but yeah charge your phones leo Choose your own adventure You're eight years old and you're at the mall with your mom. Oh Look a cute doggy in the pet store You let go of your mom's hand and waddle toward the store window

Not caring about anything else in the world, but getting a better look at the dog a minute later You turn around but mom's not there. You look around Peering into the busy crowds, but you don't see your mom anywhere. Great job. You're a helpless Worthless kid who's lost in the mall. Okay harsh and it's all your fault But this is no time to panic using all eight years of your earthly wisdom You look left to see a seers, which by the way is no longer in business dumb dumb to your right You see a spencer's to waddle over to seers turn to page 172 To waddle over to spencer's turn to page 4 39. All right mom is definitely in seers

Even though it doesn't exist anymore. You think well seers is much more of a mom store than spencers is okay That's a cool horoscope regardless Not a horoscope at all is the best kind of horoscope. You're welcome. I wonder which route the gods will choose We have another guest channeler. Oh, I love those four Virgo Virgo wait jack. I'm getting a live channeling It's from a famous Virgo. I think it's It's it's a me

Mario That's all right. You've all been saying my name wrong. It's the whole time It's a me Mario Like a the girl horse a mare. It's a very frustrating having your name spunking wrong by everyone Even the man who plays me in the video games. It's really makes me feel marginalized Like i'm a max man

I need to fill up a hole in my house with some the mash mellows If you think a mass kitty you're maybe a macarita Can I get better than the mushroom kingdom supermarkets the one with the shiny marble floors? But I will not give up. I will mash on my brothers including luayaki And that's picnic mammoth looking thing monty. I will be a master for this cause We will be like the avengers from the marrable lube Marry us of the world you nice Mark my words

Oh, you need the horoscope. Uh, the scorpios are crazy I've never heard of someone force a meme so hard. I don't know what what do you mean disgusting I don't know what you mean. I don't know what mario that person channeled. It's not my mario. All right, not my mario I don't know. I'm I'm fully in support of that voice It's not marvell. God damn it That's why that's where I drew the line Libra you waddle over to spencers. Let's go Ah the store is dimly lit and smells like the inside of a halloween mask

We all know that smell you hear boulevard of broken dreams playing over the speakers Mom You meekly call out mommy Everyone else there is twice your size and height A life-size sally mannequin from the nightmare before christmas stares blankly at you Modeling a tim Burton themed christmas sweater. That's half off. Oh good deal on your left There's a wall of t-shirts with various cartoon characters like goku and pickle rick and fender Pickle rick didn't exist at this time. I I'm mashing my timelines

Mommy You say a little louder You waddle like a toddler towards the back of the store. Wow. There sure are a lot of handcuffs Oh, cool. They have underwear made of candy They have lollipops there, but they're in the shape of something you can't quite make out There you are your mother screams from outside the store. She rushes over to you. I'm so sorry, honey I was at sears For the last hour thinking you were right behind me. Oh, I'm never letting go of your hand again

She takes your hand a comforting warmth fills your soul She grabs a few of those neat lollipops Before leaving you out of the magical store. Wow, you'll remember this forever and remember it for your therapist in 20 years Also, I told you mom was at sears mom is always at sears. You never said that I said that Mom is always at sears. No, I don't think so. Thank you so much for joining us again this week This is a lot of fun. Please follow me on twitter and instagram Perhaps I may be documenting my very lonesome journey and perhaps it includes crunchy roll Is there crunchy roll in my lonesome single girl journey? I think I think that's you'll have to follow

Fair prediction. You will have to follow to find out. Thank you so much for joining I can't wait to see and hear from you all again next week. Please join us and who knows? Perhaps we have another quiz or life stories or dogs talking Oh, we haven't done that in a while. Have we? They haven't been using their words. They haven't been using their words Also, like if you have like ideas that you want us to do for our podcast, please let us know at dad hug me 10 dad hug me 10 Simple dad hug me 10. Thank you guys again. It was great hanging out with you guys. Join us for the party next week

Until next time haters. Bye