Fake Doctors, Real Friends with Zach and Donald - 423: My Faith in Humanity
Episode Date: June 8, 2021On this week's episode, Turk and Carla struggle in couples therapy. In the real world, we're getting ready for pride and Donald kids are excelling. Learn more about your ad-choices at https://www.ihe...artpodcastnetwork.comSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
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We're sorry.
This episode has a high-pitched buzz noise that Daniel was unable to figure out.
So rude.
I love it.
Thanks.
Great.
Swell.
I have so much funny shit to talk to you about, I don't even know where to begin. I got a lot of shit to talk to you about I don't even know where to begin.
I got a lot of shit to talk to you guys about too.
I'm built up.
I'm built up.
I'm going to start then and then you can get into it.
How come you get to start?
Because I always start it all the way.
That's rock, paper, scissors.
Rock, paper, scissors, shoot.
Rock, paper, scissors, shoot.
I covered that shit in my paper.
Get the fuck out of here. I covered that shit. Go ahead. Oh, no, no. Get the fuck out of here.
Oh, shit.
I covered that shit.
Go ahead.
You go first because mine's probably going to be a downer.
Go ahead.
Why are you going to be a downer?
I'm in such a good mood.
I don't got...
You go first.
Look outside.
It's so beautiful out.
Look at this day.
Look at the sun, man.
This is why you live in LA.
Look at that sun on the orange tree.
I am excited for what this afternoon has in store for my family yes
this um this um this is um listen this is a very funny episode let me just say that right off the
bat and i usually don't watch these scrubs is a good thing to watch first thing in the morning
i gotta tell you because i woke up i'm a little grumpy i had my coffee and then and but normally
we you know others think i usually watch right before we record but today i was busy so i had a little grumpy. I had my coffee. And then, but normally we,
you know,
others think,
I usually watch right before we record,
but today I was busy.
So I had to make sure I watched first thing in the morning.
I'm sitting there cracking up.
It is funny this episode, dude.
This was a very funny episode.
I mean, joke, joke, joke, joke.
It's like a barrage of jokes.
A lot of,
a lot of,
a lot of jokes that if you missed it,
guess what?
You missed it.
And you have to kind of go back and listen again.
This is a very jokey.
Some episodes are more jokey than others.
And this one's like, and I was cracking up at every single one.
I wanted to tell you that I posted, Disney made me take down this picture I posted of
Cheaper by the Dozen because I guess I wasn't supposed to post it.
It's such a cute picture.
I know.
And it's such a cute picture.
You got freaking,
oh shit,
they hit you with the dude.
Now you know you sound
designed a confidentiality.
Well, I didn't think they'd care
because we wrap tomorrow.
It's exciting.
We wrap tomorrow
after two months
and I took a selfie
of all of us
and I understand
they don't want pictures out yet
but I did it.
Anyway, the funny thing
is all my DMs,
every single person
thinks they have an original joke.
They all have the exact same joke.
Why are you with all of Donald's kids?
Boom.
God damn.
The internet never fails.
And then your wife hit me up.
She's like, why are you hanging out
with other biracial children?
Oh my God. up she's like why are you hanging out with other biracial children oh my god um and that was one funny thing i wanted to tell you and then um the other thing is i want i can't tell you enough
everyone listener you have to watch this special bo burnham's special inside you watch it i have
not watched it yet another thing i'm slow Listen, if you like my recommendations, I assume some of you do,
this is one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
This man is so talented, and I think I mentioned it before,
but over the course of the pandemic, he shot himself doing his material,
which is mostly comedic songs.
Donald, you would love it, in one room.
And he shot it himself.
He lit it himself. He edited it.
He wrote all the music.
At some points, it's funny, and at other points,
it's heartbreaking. And it's just a
beautiful piece of art. And I wish
I was as talented as he is.
It's on Netflix.
Please check it out. Danil, you will
absolutely love it.
What does Josh always say? No envy, no fear.
Don't be envious.
I have envy.
You have a completely different set of tools that you use.
I know, but let me put it this way.
Let me put it this way.
I'm sure there are guys who are riding the bench,
and they're watching LeBron play.
Right.
And they go, okay, I'm in the NBA.
I'm decent.
I made it to the NBA.
I'm on the team.
And then they watch LeBron.
They're like, fuck.
That's sometimes how I feel when I see great artists who do a similar thing to me do what they do.
I go, fuck.
I think I'm decent.
I don't know if I'm that good.
Well, dude, just think about me, man.
Just think about me.
My whole life, all I've ever wanted to be was in a Star Wars or a fucking Marvel movie.
And look at all of these African-American actors that are crushing it in Star Wars and in Marvel movies.
And you know whose name never comes up?
And I know this because I always ask my agent, well, what did they say about me?
And he's always like, they didn't.
What a dick.
Damn.
What a dick.
He keeps it real with me.
But I mean, even John Boyega might be like, oh my God, Donald Faison's been in like multiple
fucking things.
And John Boyega's like, but I am in Star Wars.
And he's always wanted that.
Right, I'm just saying, okay, when you use that analogy, I go, the grass is always greener.
I mean, you've been in-
The grass, you can't get any greener than Star Wars, bro.
It can't get any greener.
Well, you still have time, right?
You got, what, 45 years left?
You're fine.
That being said, that being said, I have some news.
Go ahead.
You're pregnant.
I tried.
I wish.
I tried.
It would be an ass baby, too.
I tried.
I would cuddle your ass, baby.
Oh, my goodness.
Oh, Daniel, that's something I need on this soundboard by the way joelle going oh my goodness i got it right there got it right there so look i tried really really really hard
to stick to this plant-based diet oh you, you've already given up? I haven't necessarily given up, but it's not doing well on my gut like it does for everybody
else.
So much so that I went to a doctor and complained and had to get an ultrasound on my stomach
because I was having issues with digesting some of this food.
Turns out everything's fine, so people don't worry.
But let's also just, we need to tell the audience
that Donald is a bit of a hypochondriac in that,
and your wife told me this the other day,
and you acknowledged it when you were over at my house,
that Donald can have a mosquito bite and be like,
I have cancer.
Yes, that is me.
We need to rush to the emergency room
because I have an itchy cancer spot.
I like to stay on top of things, you know what I mean? Or at least I like to try. But you to rush to the emergency room because I have an itchy cancer spot. I like to stay on top of things.
You know what I mean?
Or at least I like to try.
But you always go to the extreme.
Absolutely.
Okay.
Can I gift you a month of food that's prepared for you from a brand like, let's say, Cushi?
Absolutely.
And what they do is they deliver a little cooler outside your door, and there's a fresh lunch and dinner in the cooler every morning.
Yes.
And before you run to the emergency room, it might be that you just aren't having the – it's hard to prepare stuff like that without any knowledge.
And if I gift you this, let's say I'll give you a month of it, and you can see if you like the food.
Okay, I'm down to try anything.
That's your Hanukkah present early.
Thank you, Uncle Zach.
That being said, last night, the wife and I and a few of our friends went to Salt Bay.
Oh, that's the story.
That was all a lead-up to say that you went to a steak restaurant.
Let me tell you something right now.
I forgot how good steak tastes.
It's good.
It's pretty tasty.
Yeah.
We didn't get the gold meat.
I would hope not.
No, we didn't get that.
And also, Salt Bae wasn't there.
So it was like, okay.
Did someone still come do his signature move?
Somebody came and did the Salt Bae move
and then even did the
noise to the camera
that we all had out.
It was like, hold up, I'm getting the...
It's so cheesy though. I mean, when you zoom out, it's so cheesy.
You all had your cameras
out while he did Salt Bae. I didn't have my camera.
Are you kidding me? I didn't have my camera. You all had your cameras out while Salt Bae
is fucking understudied to do Salt Bae. I didn't have my camera. Are you kidding me? I didn't have my camera. You had your cameras out while salt bae's fucking understudy did his salt bae.
It's so embarrassing.
Not an understudy.
It was his understudy.
Joel, call it what it is.
It was his understudy was there.
You had fucking salt bae's understudy
and you're all like, let me get my camera.
Anyway, that being
said, you know,
my stomach was fine after I ate the meat and that's when
i was conspiracy to no see you're fucking trying it out i'm not going to go down i'm just asking
you to watch cowspiracy now you've watched now you've had some meat i'm not going down that
rabbit hole all right let's get into it let's but hold on before we before we go before we go any further i just want to say uh i am still sticking to my plan in uh
in eating healthier and eating a lot less meat but that is probably one time in a few months
that i'm going to eat oh i know what i want to tell you the other thing that my dms blew up with
i posted that picture of you you know uh grilling at my house on memorial day and i thought you looked great
obviously but all the dms were like damn donald oh junk donald looks great donald cut weight
swole all this stuff okay well i'll say this it looks like it but i've only lost about 10
to maybe 12 pounds of weight well that's noticeable's noticeable, especially in your head. Yeah, that's where you're seeing most of it.
The weight's gone there.
Because you went full, like, you know.
You went full rerun for a second.
I was bloated.
Yo, dude, I was eating very unhealthy.
Very, very, very unhealthy.
Well, you look good.
I'm just telling you that the random assortment of lovely people
that slid into my DMs only wanted to talk about that you looked like a dilf.
And I love them for that. I love them them i love being a dad somebody wants to fuck five six seven eight stories about a show we made about a bunch of docs and nurses
and a janitor who loved me i said he's got stories that we all should know
I said he's got stories that we all should know.
So gather round to hear our, gather round to hear our Scrubs Rewatch Show with Zach and Dano.
Dano has something he wants to add in to the food conversation.
That's what I'm talking about.
That is what I'm talking about.
Wu-Tang forever.
Or do not.
There is no try try
go ahead daniel all i wanted to add was that you know since i moved in with my wonderful
girlfriend stephanie who i love very much um we have you know i have changed my diet significantly
i can tell you're skinnier i appreciate that but you know i think about the three r's reduce
reuse recycle and the main one i want to talk about is reduce i'm just saying it briefly is But I think about the three R's, reduce, reuse, recycle.
And the main one I want to talk about is reduce.
I'm just saying it briefly, is that sometimes it feels like it's an all or nothing when it comes to treating your body healthier.
It's like you have to cut this entirely.
You have to cut that entirely.
And I have found that just reducing by going out to once a week or once every two weeks,
cooking at home more, and reducing amount of like prepackaged foods and
just like eating whole foods that has made a significant,
significant like improvement to my diet and my overall health.
And so while,
you know,
I'm just saying when it comes to these things,
like I don't want to eat meat anymore.
I totally get that.
And I totally get that the entire like,
you know,
meat industry is like on the whole really fucking evil.
That said, that the entire like you know meat industry is like on the whole really fucking evil that said if you want to have a steak every once in a while taking your time down from like four times a month
to once a month that's a huge reduction for you on its own and i just and i think of course and i
think that's important i'm just saying you're not you're not i totally agree with you sure but i think when you go down the rabbit hole of of of factory farming yeah um it's hard to it's hard for me to to ever go back i i totally
get it and you know i'm not saying if you want to go kill a deer in the woods and eat venison
that's not what i'm talking about i'm talking about the whole factory you know big agriculture
farming business and i know that this is a privilege in its own way,
but every Sunday, me and Stephanie, we go to the Hollywood Farmer's Market over on Ivar,
right next to where Amoeba Music used to be, RIP.
And we only buy meat from this sustainable farm,
where sometimes we'll go and they're like,
we don't have any pork products this week
because we're reducing how many, you know,
pigs we're slaughtering.
It's like they deliver food in a way
that is still sustainable to their farm.
And I know, again, it's like,
this is such a small drop in the bucket
of the entire world of factory farming.
But there was something about hearing these people be like,
we don't have that this week,
not because we're sold out,
but because we are actively reducing the amount
that we offer this product to keep our farm sustainable.
Like that to me is a practice
that is a lot more helpful to the earth in general. So I just think, you know, being,
thinking about it sustainably rather than a one or zero binary about how you eat food,
I think will help your mindset when it comes to being healthier in general. It doesn't need to
be all or nothing. It's if you just change your perspective to it, that's all I'm saying.
Sure. Sure. Yeah. I totally, I totally hear you That's all I'm saying. Sure. That's all.
Zach, I love you.
Zach, Zach, Zach, I love you.
Okay, Casey, calm down.
We're trying to do a show.
It's all I had to say.
Hey, hey.
It was lovely to have you over my home
for Memorial Day.
I love your family.
That was such a great,
it was a treat to see
Carey Brothers
and his wife.
And your kids are adorable.
Your little girl jumping rope.
Wilder was showing off for Amanda Kloots.
What a good jump roper she's become.
And she's really good, dude.
She's gotten really good.
She was doing tricks.
Yeah, you know, she's like, she's like, my daughter's one of those girls that, I should say one of those humans.
I don't want to put a, I don't want to put anything on it,
but she's one of those humans that goes out there,
and if she really wants to do something,
she's not going to quit until she gets it done.
And that's a quality that when I watch it,
I'm like, where did she get that from?
You know what I mean?
Like, sometimes I think she must have got this
from her mother,
because I'm not this hardcore into it and then i think about
my animation and stuff like that and how i started from you know not knowing how to do it and how i'm
i'm getting all right i'm getting better now and like this girl when it comes to anything hula hoop
jumping rope swimming basketball base whatever whatever it is if she really wants to do it she's gonna put a hundred
percent into it uh and it's really refreshing to see Rocco has just started um you know we talked
about this whole leadership thing and everything I'm thank you for giving me the opportunity to
brag about my kids we talked about this whole leadership thing and it really is starting to
come through with you know what I mean just with that little pep talk, I'm noticing it in everything now and how he talks to his friends and how he, you know what I mean?
Like they were doing a scrimmage the other day and they were losing and, you know, they scored and then they scored again.
They scored and then they scored again.
And without the coach saying anything, the coach said two minutes left.
Rocco goes, guys, we don't have to score anymore.
We just have to stop them from scoring.
Wow.
And he said this like a bunch of times. He was like, everybody play defense.
And it just blew me away that this kid had to know it all to freaking be like,
all right, I understand the situation.
I'm going to lead us to victory.
Instead of them not scoring again, Rocco kicks another goal.
He gets an opportunity and he kicks another goal to win the game.
And it was like, wow, dude.
Can I come to a game?
I want to come to a game.
He has a game on Saturday.
If you want to come to a game and you're not working.
If it's not too far, I'll come.
It's never too far.
It's always in the Los Angeles area.
Is there any sort of, what do you call it, halftime show?
Yeah, I do a show where I put on a bikini.
I don't know much about non-professional sports.
Dude, happy pride, first of all, guys.
Happy motherfucking pride.
Amen.
Pride to all those who celebrate pride.
I bust out my pride Nikes.
Love them.
Nice.
They're beautiful.
They have not only a rainbow, but also sparkle.
All right.
They're fire.
Beautiful.
Hooch is back.
Not only is Hooch back, but Turner has arrived.
Now, Turner is Tom Hanks' actual brother.
Yes.
You can tell even more so than how he looks, but in his voice, he has the exact same voice.
They kind of sound alike, yes.
And I think, didn't we learn that there's certain things that Tom Hanks doesn't have time to do that he does?
Oh, he does the, that's cool.
No, I think for certain, Tom Hanks might do,
obviously he's going to do Toy Story movies,
but if it's Toy Story or the audio book,
he hands it off to his brother.
Oh, I did not know that.
Yeah, I remember hearing that at the time.
I did not know that.
I don't know if that's 100% true.
That's what I remember hearing back in the day.
And I wouldn't be surprised because he sounds, Joel can Google it. I don't know if that's 100% true. That's what I remember hearing back in the day. And I wouldn't be surprised because he sounds...
Joel can Google it.
I don't even know.
It might be top secret.
Maybe I just spilled the beans.
But he does sound exactly like him.
They do.
I have never seen Turner and Hooch.
Neither have I.
I know it's about a dog and Tom Hanks.
Tom Hanks and a big dog.
Yeah, that's all I know.
I've never been a fan of movies about a guy and a dog.
Me either.
I just never tuned into any of them.
You name a movie about a guy and a dog, I've never seen it.
Yeah, same here.
James Matthew Hanks Wikipedia page says that he does do voiceover work for his older brother, Tom Hanks, most notably for Sheriff Woody on Talking Toys and Video Games.
There you go, video games games that's pretty cool so if you're listening to those video games going oh my god
it's tom hanks it's not i'm literally trying to think of a movie about a guy and a dog that i
watched and i was i've never seen a movie about a guy and a dog i've also never i've never saw
any of any person any movie that's like a guy and an animal like like the bj and the bear or
some dog sledding movie with what's his name
i've never saw that what was the clint eastwood and the monkey one i never saw that bj and you
never saw marley in me i saw i saw marley and i couldn't understand why everybody was crying i was
like okay man there it is it's the whole life of the dog and his whole life
transforms with the life of the dog.
It's beautiful. I take it back.
When I was a kid, I did see Sounder,
the black Oyella.
A black
Oyella. What's the name of
the movie with the orangutan
and Clint Eastwood? BJ and a bear.
No. It would be a bear, not a
monkey. No, the bear
is Clint Eastwood and BJ is the monkey or some shit like that.
I thought it had a better title than that.
When they're in a truck or something like that, right?
Yeah, they're truckers.
Yeah.
What?
Is the orangutan a trucker?
I don't know.
I don't understand.
Is every which way but loose?
No.
Which way but loose?
Every which way but loose, yeah.
Those are the images I'm seeing here.
They're in a truck with an orangutan. What isj and the bear then i want to type that in i'm trying to think i've
ever seen a movie with a person yeah the star i didn't see the most recent harrison ford one
yeah bj and the bear is the same type of thing it's with uh somebody else and a monkey. What the hell is that?
And it's got all of the same things.
It's got, you know, like... Is it Clint Eastwood?
No way Clint Eastwood did two monkey movies.
Greg Avigian?
It was a television show.
BJ and the Bear was a television show.
And it had all of the fixings like, you know,
the cop that looks like Jackie Gleason,
the hot blonde girl,
and then the dude in the truck with the monkey.
Okay.
It aired on NBC from February 10th, 1979 to May 9th, 1981.
BJ and the Bear, created by somebody.
We should talk about Scrooge because we don't have that much time.
Maybe that's what we should do, a rewatch of BJ and the Bear.
because we don't have that much time.
Maybe that's what we should do,
a rewatch of BJ and the Bear.
I just think it's funny that I found a genre that none of us have ever seen,
person and animal.
Person and animal.
And also, the CGI animals that are starting to take over,
I think they're so weird.
They don't look right.
Big thumbs down from me.
You know, I saw Cruella,
and I thought the CGI animals looked weird.
What did you think of Cruella?
I don't want to talk about it on the air.
We'll talk about it privately.
I did not see Cruella.
But all I can say is they did not need to remake Lion King like that.
Despite the soundtrack being incredible,
all of those emotionless CGI animals to try and recreate
the emotion you got from the original Disney movie was
a waste of VFX money, in my personal opinion.
I gotta say that when I was on set the other day
with my friend the Rottweiler, I said
when he wasn't doing
what he was supposed to, I was like, you know, nowadays
these are starting to become CGI
dogs. And the trainer
was like, and I was like, sorry. Oh no. And the trainer was like,
and I was like, sorry.
Oh, no.
And that was when the dog bit your ass, too.
The dog was not doing what it was supposed to,
and I was like,
haven't we learned a lesson about this?
All right, so this was very funny.
I didn't understand why everybody hates Turk and JD
in the beginning.
Like, we're walking down the hall trying to give high fives to people, and they're getting dissed.
Well, because we think we are king shit at the hospital, right?
We are so feeling ourselves at this point, and we have all these jokes, and we think we're the cool kids.
And we have done so much.
I mean, we put so much effort into just getting Turner and Hooch on the same surgical procedure.
We've really gone out of our way just to be able to say Turner and Hooch and
then fold our arms and put our backs.
Back to back.
Like we,
we planned.
I,
I,
I don't get these two.
They plan so well.
They're so strategic and just getting,
just to have that one moment where they can go Turner Turner and Hooch, and go back to back.
And so Hooch is already sick of this shit.
And he's like, everybody hates you guys.
Which is a really harsh thing to say, Hooch.
But he knows how to cut us where it hurts because we really want to be liked.
But then we're like, Hooch is crazy.
Yeah.
And then, all right, so then we cut to you and Carla in therapy.
Now, this shit was hilarious.
Carla reveals that you cry after you orgasm.
Yeah.
And right away we answer that.
Right away we freaking call that joke back.
I know.
It's so funny.
But I have to say that I remember a line.
I guess it's in a different episode where I go, there's no shame in climaxing.
I go, there's no shame in crime axing.
Now, I don't know how that line is not in this episode,
but I guess you're crying after orgasming comes back up because I do at one point say there's no shame in crime axing.
Right.
But it happens right away, dude.
It's like we come out of the on-call room, and you go, why are you crying?
I go, no reason.
Yeah, that is so funny.
It's just so that joke pays off that I cry after I bust.
That Turk cries after he busts.
Oh, my God.
After he busts.
After he busts.
That's what I'm talking about.
Listen, how about when I've announced that I'm going to move out, and I'm consoling a couple.
I'm consoling a couple who's just lost their father.
And I say, was he lucky enough to enjoy a washer and dryer while he was alive in his unit?
Yeah.
And then any mention of any hot neighbors?
Neighbors, yeah.
JD is such a dick sometimes.
Well, this is why they're not liked in the hospital, I'm guessing.
Okay, now how about Sam hitting his fucking bike on the entryway door?
That was so funny.
And then he got tangled up in the frame.
Yeah.
Sam had a lot of funny physical comedy in this one, but that one was amazing.
physical comedy in this one,
but that one was amazing.
He just fucking nails the door and then falls
back, I guess, onto a mat that you can't
see because he gets tangled in the frame.
That shit was so funny.
Elliot's getting anxious.
I didn't realize that
she was...
She's horny. She's not anxious. She's horny.
But she could fuck JD,
can't she?
No.
They're done.
They're friends.
They're finally back to copacetic.
Okay.
And she wants the D.
I'm just saying they're both single.
If she wants the D, she knows where to look.
Dude, she's on the hunt for D. Do you see what she does to the hot blonde chick that tries to meet the guest star?
Yeah, she tells her that her mom died.
Yeah.
She says, oh, it's Jake.
It's played by Josh Randall, who was very good, by the way.
Josh Randall did a very
funny job.
Josh Randall
walks in, and then right before Sarah
can even talk to him,
the other woman comes in, and she's like, I got this.
And the woman's like, I'm good. And she goes,
your mom's dead. Yeah.
Yeah. The woman runs off
crying. Yes.
That's how much Elliot is
ready for some D. Elliot wants that
D. Elliot wants that Randall D.
My kids are on their
way home right now and they're crying
because it was the last day of school.
Oh, Casey just told you that?
Oh, that's good. That means they love school,
which is a good sign. They do love school.
Crying. Anyway.
What about when Todd goes,
Nurse, suction! And she goes,
Patient's not even here yet.
And he goes, I know.
How is he not fired?
How does he not get fired?
How does he not get fired? How does he not get fired?
I don't know, and I guess you can't do that joke anymore,
but it is funny.
Come on.
It's fucking funny.
I thought it was funny, too.
Hey, speaking of funny, Scott Harris wants to come on the show
after he heard about, he said he needs to defend himself.
He says him getting hurt on set, I guess, is defensible.
And I'm not sure that-
I'm not sure Scott Harris just wants to come on the podcast, because a lot of people want
to come on the podcast.
Someone told me that they walk- someone wrote in my DMs that they walk around the house
singing Charles Papert, all balls and no shaft.
I think it's so funny that they don't know Charles Papert.
Oh, boy.
They've never met Charles Papert, and they're walking around singing that in their house.
He's so proud of that song, dude.
I told you what he did.
Yeah, he's so proud of it.
I went to work.
Well, he's proud to have a song, you know?
We have no idea if he's all balls and no shots.
Dude, I went to work, and he was there, and he was like, there he is, guys.
Donald, do it.
And I was like, what?
He's like, sing them the song.
I was like, get the fuck out of here.
He's proud to have a song.
Sing them the song, bud.
And I was like, Charles Papert, all balls and no shaft.
And he's like, see, I told you there was a song.
He was so happy about it.
Well, there you go.
There you go.
By the way, how about our caller last week?
That was insane.
I can't get them out of my mind.
Dude, I loved it.
It was such funny, cringy radio,
but I just can't stop thinking about that
poor guy and how...
I don't know. I came away thinking
bad for him.
Feeling bad for him.
Well, you know, he seemed to be
very happy in his relationship. He didn't seem to mind
it. But you know what?
What I didn't ask is...
Or didn't get into. The next time they're on, I want i want to get into like maybe you're turned on by this maybe you know some people are
turned on by by this and maybe he's one of them maybe because he it just seems like there's a
missing piece no yeah i mean it seemed like it seemed like the fact that he was all right with
it and that the dude still comes over, you know.
Yeah, but there are dudes and gals
who get turned on by seeing their partner
have sex with a friend.
Totally.
Can I ask you a question?
Why are you changing the subject?
I'm not going to pitch this to you and Casey.
Oh, my.
That's what I'm talking about.
No.
Jesus Christ.
I just didn't understand
why JD is such
a moron. JD's a moron, dude.
In this entire
episode, JD's
a moron. You can dance your way from old zealand to new
zealand it was funny but he doesn't know geography but by the way i don't know geography either i
gotta say the the american public school system in at least in the state of new jersey uh i think
we spent two weeks on geography i don't know geography at all dude you went to northwestern
harvard you don't take geography at northwestern i mean i suppose you could but i don't know geography at all dude you went to northwestern harvard you don't take
geography at northwestern i mean i suppose you could but i didn't it never comes up i really
if you gave me an empty map of the united states could you draw would you legit know
where every state goes no not every state but daniel would you if you all right are the state lines drawn
out yeah like just yeah yeah yeah i think i could get over 40 for sure yeah over 40 oh i could
probably get 40 i don't know if i'd get 50 well yeah but i'm just saying that's you know where
it gets 80 isn't that horrible i mean how is that possible that's our public school system have you
been to every yeah have you been to every state in america no but i feel like at 46 i should daniel has i feel like daniel you've been
to every state in america i dj'd for 10 years donald i've been to i've been to every state
in the united states yeah he's like i've done mdma in every state okay let's not let's we'll We'll knock that down a few states, but sure.
No, I know where New Zealand is.
I certainly am not good with my European, South American, Central American geography.
I know Italy.
Italy's the boot.
I know Asia.
I sometimes get Asia and the USSR kind of confused because they're connected. There's not even a USSR anymore.
One's a continent.
Oh, my goodness.
I guarantee you all four of us would be humbled and embarrassed if we were given a world map with empty countries.
Oh, my God.
A world map?
Oh, Jesus.
Yeah.
There's no way.
Now, meanwhile, in other countries, they're like speaking four languages.
They, you know, we suck.
But anyway.
Todd did amateur porn.
Oh, my God.
That was so funny.
I wrote that down.
Hold on.
Let me write the words.
He goes, you're in therapy.
And he goes, I don't know how.
I don't know.
Todd says, I don't know how you do it.
Make love with your lady while some old dude is filming you?
And you go, Todd, that's not couples therapy.
And he goes, then what did I do?
And you go, you did amateur porn.
And he goes, sweet.
Sweet, yeah.
You're jumping all around.
You got to go back a little bit.
Sorry, bud.
Sorry.
The thing is, I laughed so much, I wrote so much shit down.
It's like two shows worth of laughter.
We'll be right back after these words.
When you find that bright spot to help you get through your day, it's powerful.
That's where The Bright Side comes in.
A new daily podcast from Hello Sunshine that's bringing you a daily dose of joy.
I'm Danielle Robay.
And I'm Simone Boyce.
Listen, both Danielle and I are reporters.
We've covered the news and we know the world can feel heavy.
But the Bright Side podcast is a space to have a little fun,
to learn something new and get into some friendly debates.
That's right.
Join us five days a week to see how life can look from the bright side.
We'll hear from celebrities, authors, experts, and listeners like you.
Whether it's relationships, friend advice, or figuring out how to navigate life's transitions,
we'll talk through it all together.
Listen to The Bright Side from Hello Sunshine every weekday on the iHeartRadio app,
Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
Parents, if you've ever experienced bedtime battles with the kids, I'm going to let you
into a little secret. I'm Abby, a mother of two, and I had these battles myself. Endless excuses,
delay tactics, and many tears and tantrums, but I've created a solution.
The perfect kids podcast that makes bedtime a dream. It's called Koala Moon and it's
hosted by me, Abby. With over 300 episodes packed with original stories and sleep meditations,
Koala Moon makes bedtimes easy and enjoyable. Episodes start out engaging and really rather
magical, but as they progress, they gently slow to a calm and relaxing pace
to have your little ones out like a light.
Since launching in 2022,
Koala Moon has helped with over 20 million nights sleep
and received over 6,000 five-star reviews.
Win back your evenings.
Listen to Koala Moon now on the iHeartRadio app,
Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your evenings. Listen to Koala Moon now on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Hi, this is Shannon Doherty, host of the new podcast, Let's Be Clear
with Shannon Doherty. You may know me from, let's see, 90210, Charmed, Mallrats, Heathers.
Probably also know me from my stage four cancer diagnosis and sharing that
journey with so many of you. There's something so authentic about a podcast. It's me connecting,
me talking raw in the moment. That's what my goal is to give you, to talk about why I feel that
cancer to a certain extent is a gift, what my responsibilities are as a person with cancer,
because I think that there's something so much bigger than me.
And to be honest, I'm still trying to find out what that is.
And maybe together, we'll find it.
It's going to be a wild ride, so I hope that you all tune in.
Listen to Let's Be Clear with Shannon Doherty
on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts,
or wherever you listen to podcasts.
Hey, my name's Jay Shetty,
and I'm the host of On Purpose.
I just had a great conversation with Michael B. Jordan,
and you can listen to it right now.
Michael is known for his performances
in both film and television.
His breakout role was in Fruitvale Station, playing Oscar Grant,
which earned him widespread praise and numerous award nominations.
His portrayal of Killmonger in Marvel's Black Panther, one of my favorites,
further solidified his status as one of Hollywood's leading actors,
earning him widespread acclaim for his complex and compelling performance.
In our conversation, Michael really opens up.
You're going to love listening to it.
And I can't wait for you to check it out.
The closest to getting what you want is always the hardest.
It's always the feeling when you're getting ready.
People give up right before they get what they always wanted to get.
People quit.
Listen to On Purpose with Jay Shetty on the iHeartRadio app,
Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
Scrubs Rewatch Show
with Zach and Donald.
And we're back.
We're back, we're back, we're back.
You know, we should translate this show,
Joelle, into Russian.
Um,
okay. Here's why.
Why? Scrubs is huge in Russiaussia i don't know if you knew that
is i heart huge in russia no but maybe they have an affiliate and here's the thing
the percentage that are fluent in english i think is i i infer is lower than other countries where
we are popular like germ Germany or Australia or Italy.
But my point is I know we have so many
Russian fans that would love to listen
to this, but they don't speak English.
Anyway, just an idea, Joelle.
I will
investigate. I know we can do a transcription
of it.
I just wonder, I don't know how you'd do it.
I guess you'd have to hire
Russians, but that's what they do with Scrubs, obviously. In any show, they... No, I just wonder. I don't know how you do it. I guess you'd have to hire Russians.
But that's what they do with Scrubs, obviously.
In any show, they...
Well, I hope they get the same guy that does my voice on the show to do my voice.
They do.
You know that in every country.
I don't know if we've mentioned this.
In every country, once you're assigned...
Once you become a known actor, you're sort of assigned a voice that's always you.
Well, I truly hope that I'm getting that guy some work.
Yeah.
Word up.
Why did I laugh so hard at the brown Hulk?
That was hilarious.
I know, but why did I laugh so hard?
That shit had me rolling for some reason.
Like I was rolling.
You don't realize that you're punching me
because you're still mad about the kiss.
So you're just destroying my arm.
And I'm like, wow, you're like Brown Hulk.
That's funny.
Now, listen, I get every cotton ball in the entire hospital in this fantasy to make this woman comfortable.
I thought this was a funny plot line.
She's nearing the end of her life and trying to make this woman comfortable. I thought this was a funny plot line. She's, she's,
she's,
she's nearing the end of her life and trying to decide what to do.
But she,
she can't remember that JD is her doctor and she just wants her handsome
neighbor to decide.
And,
and it's got to the point of like,
we're going to make you comfortable.
What does that even mean?
And then they cut to her in a room full of cotton balls.
I imagine that would be comfortable.
It would be nice.
Probably not as nice as morphine.
Right.
Morphine's probably better.
Morphine would be better than cotton balls.
I worked with the young lady that played Betty.
She was in a lot of things, actually.
But we did Clueless together back in the day, and she played a nurse.
Really?
Yeah.
It was just really interesting that Ellen Albertini
is her name
wasn't she also in
an Adam Sandler movie
I don't know
but David Feinberg
David Feinberg wrote this
it's another example
like the episode before,
of it not being one of the regular writers in the writer's room.
And they farmed this one out to a man named David Feinberg,
who neither of us have ever met.
And it was directed by the legendary TV comedy director Ken Winningham.
I love it.
I love when Ken directs.
So, yeah, I say the four-hour trip to New Zealand,
and you don't even know where new zealand is
and i say you can dance your way there from old zealand which is the dumbest fucking joke but i
love me dude but after the dude decides you know for the lady her brother comes and sues him did
you notice at the act break he's walking back into frame who accidentally the dude who
played the brother if you look at if you look at it he walks out and then with your ad lib when
your ad lib is going he's well i guess maybe they said cut and you still probably thought the scene
was over and i was riffing and he came back. And he's walking back into frame. Well, maybe the character had more to say.
How about, oh my God, this was so funny.
When the janitor comes in holding an old woman to try and get Elliot's attention.
And he goes, Elliot, my neighbor fainted too.
And she's like, hey man, I thought we were over this.
And he goes, yeah, sorry, it's worth a try.
And he goes, well, put her back in her room.
He goes, she's not a patient.
I got her at the mall.
And he goes, I better get you back to the food court.
Your husband's probably about to come to by now, which means he knocked out her husband.
Yeah.
With a bat.
Because he's walking around.
With a bat the whole episode.
The chatter's insane this episode.
He's collected rats from the roof and he puts a dead one in the bag amongst all the living ones.
So that all the living ones know that they should toe the line or they're going to get killed by him.
And they all escape the bag and run rampant through the hospital.
Yes.
And he starts chasing them all around.
With a pink metal bat.
An aluminum bat.
Yeah.
Elliot has a VO in the middle of nowhere in this episode.
I forgot that sometimes Bill just gives the VO to someone who's not voiceovering that episode.
She even did the look away.
Yeah.
Like JD.
To remember what Cox told her about ignoring boys.
Yeah.
By the way, it works instantly.
The second Cox is like, you're playing it wrong.
Just ignore him and he'll like you.
She ignores him for two seconds and then he's like, she's cute.
I've laughed so hard at freaking the janitor.
They're smart.
They're organized.
And they've got my keys.
That shit made me laugh so hard.
They're smart. They're smart.
They're organized and they've got my keys.
Oh my God.
That's so hard.
I thought,
yeah,
I'm going to get,
what is this?
Here's my,
Oh,
so this was so funny.
So then Sam comes to be,
to be the Josh Randall's characters lawyer.
Here's my card. And he he goes this is a post-it
and he goes i don't get real cards until i win a case and then he reads the post-it it says buy
groceries kill self yeah oh yeah another dark joke dark joke sorry guys it was a long time ago
i laughed at mustache Sunday.
And then you,
me walking up,
I thought mustache Sunday was on.
I thought it was,
it was on,
it was next week.
And you go,
I did.
I didn't do this.
Freaking Kelso did it.
Wait a second.
You invited Kelso to mustache Sunday.
We have so many games.
Yeah.
So many. What do you think mustache Sunday is?
We draw mustaches on each other.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
Yeah.
And we think really, really hard all week of what type of stash the other person should have for mustache Sunday.
And then we probably go to restaurants and order fancy drinks and shit like that.
Yes, with our fancy mustaches.
Yes.
They're smart.
They're organized.
And they've got my keys.
That made me laugh so hard.
The rat stole his keys, Joel.
Is the caller here, Joel?
Yeah, we should probably go to break and bring the caller in.
All right, we're going to go to break and be right back with a really fun caller.
We promise you it's not about wife swapping.
When you find that bright spot to help you get through your day, it's powerful.
That's where The Bright Side comes in.
A new daily podcast from Hello Sunshine that's bringing you a daily dose of joy.
I'm Danielle Robay.
And I'm Simone Boyce.
Listen, both Danielle and I are reporters.
We've covered the news and we know the world can feel heavy.
But The Bright Side podcast is a space to have a little fun,
to learn something new,
and get into some friendly debates. That's right. Join us five days a week to see how life can look
from the bright side. We'll hear from celebrities, authors, experts, and listeners like you. Whether
it's relationships, friend advice, or figuring out how to navigate life's transitions, we'll talk
through it all together. Listen to The Bright Side from Hello Sunshine
every weekday on the iHeartRadio app,
Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
Parents, if you've ever experienced bedtime battles with the kids,
I'm going to let you into a little secret.
I'm Abby, a mother of two, and I had these battles myself.
Endless excuses, delay tactics, and many tears and tantrums.
But I've created a solution.
The perfect kids podcast that makes bedtime a dream.
It's called Koala Moon and it's hosted by me, Abby.
With over 300 episodes packed with original stories and sleep meditations,
Koala Moon makes bedtimes easy and
enjoyable. Episodes start out engaging and really rather magical, but as they progress, they gently
slow to a calm and relaxing pace to have your little ones out like a light. Since launching
in 2022, Koala Moon has helped with over 20 million nights sleep and received over 6,000 five-star reviews.
Win back your evenings.
Listen to Koala Moon now on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
Hi, this is Shannon Doherty, host of the new podcast, Let's Be Clear with Shannon Doherty.
and Doherty, host of the new podcast, Let's Be Clear with Shannon Doherty. You may know me from,
let's see, 90210, Charmed, Mallrats, Heathers. You probably also know me from my stage four cancer diagnosis and sharing that journey with so many of you. There's something so authentic
about a podcast. It's me connecting, me talking raw in the moment. That's what my goal is
to give you, to talk about why I feel that cancer to a certain extent is a gift, what my responsibilities
are as a person with cancer, because I think that there's something so much bigger than me.
And to be honest, I'm still trying to find out what that is. And maybe together, we'll find it.
It's going to be a wild ride.
So I hope that you all tune in.
Listen to Let's Be Clear with Shannon Doherty on the iHeartRadio app,
Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to podcasts.
Hey, my name is Jay Shetty, and I'm the host of On Purpose.
I just had a great conversation with Michael B. Jordan
and you can listen to it right now. Michael is known for his performances in both film and
television. His breakout role was in Fruitvale Station playing Oscar Grant which earned him
widespread praise and numerous award nominations. His portrayal of Killmonger in Marvel's Black
Panther, one of my favorites,
further solidified his status as one of Hollywood's leading actors, earning him widespread acclaim for
his complex and compelling performance. In our conversation, Michael really opens up. You're
going to love listening to it, and I can't wait for you to check it out. The closest to getting
what you want is always the hardest. It's always the feeling when you're getting ready.
People give up right before they get what they've always wanted to get.
People quit.
Listen to On Purpose with Jay Shetty on the iHeartRadio app,
Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
Scrubs Rewatch Show with Zach and Donald.
And we're back.
We're back.
And so is the high-pitched thing that Daniel is worried about.
High-pitched noise that Daniel can't get rid of.
I'm worried about it.
High-pitched noise that Daniel can't get rid of.
All right, let's play the song, Daniel.
We got a caller who gave us a holler.
We can talk, start wars, or sing show tunes, you know, like a baller.
Smoke some jazz cabbage.
Maybe talk about the episode.
So come on, Joelle, let's get the show on the road.
I love that song, dude.
I love it. Great song.
It's not as good as high-pitched noise that Daniel can't get rid of.
Let's bring him in.
Say hi to Salvador Cruz.
Salvador Cruz!
Hi, Salvador.
Hi.
Oh, my God.
I'm very nervous.
Don't be nervous.
It's just Joel and Daniel.
It's right.
It's just Joel and Daniel.
That's all.
And the biggest sitcom ever.
Yes, that's true.
It is the biggest sitcom ever.
Yes.
Bigger than Friends, Cheers, The Cosby Show.
Yes, in our minds, Donald.
Bigger than all of those.
At least in the 2000s, you're the biggest.
And I agree with you 100%.
Salvador, where are you calling us from?
I'm from Mexico.
Mexico in the hood!
Welcome, sir.
We're very glad you're here, and we're honored you joined us.
Do you have a question for us?
Anything we can answer?
I do.
First, I want to say a little about me.
I'm an English teacher.
I was an ESL teacher, English as a second language teacher.
So when I was studying university, I decided to become a teacher because I said, like,
I really want to help people.
Back in 2005, 2006, I was in high school and scrubs was the biggest thing on television in the United States, not in Mexico.
So I had to use Internet to watch YouTube, sorry, to watch scrubs illegally.
watch YouTube, sorry, to watch Scrubs illegally. And the dynamic between JD and Dr. Cox, teacher,
student, father, son, friend, friend, it's like an amazing thing. And I want to say like,
thank you so much for that relationship. That helped me being a teacher and being like, I want to be like Zach caring so much. And I want to be like Cox caring so much too. Like when you have to cry, you cry. When you have
to be harsh, you have to be harsh and all that. So Salvador, did you ever yell at your students
like Cox yelled at me? I haven't, but I haven't only been a teacher for 12 years. I don't know what's going,
what happened. And you're a young man. So you, you, uh, are you still teaching, um, English now?
Yes. Yeah. Uh, now we're like, we're having these zoom meetings that like with my students too. And
I'm working on my own project. That is my own English school english school uh and i'm working with all the material
and all that and i'm trying and i hope to use this as a uh like an activity that i can work
with my students oh that's amazing well you should that's a great idea by the way it must
have eventually come to mexico because donald and i did a trip to mexico that was season two
guadalajara so it must have
actually been translated and come right yeah but you wanted to watch it in english that's what
you're saying exactly and like to and to be like caught up like in the united states because you
watch the videos like next week in the united states and it's like oh i want to be like cut
up like now netflix hbo and etc that is like every day, every week is like worldwide.
Like you have to be like that, like on the internet.
You must have noticed because you're fluent in both languages,
you must have noticed some funny places where the things didn't translate perfectly
and they had to adapt it, right?
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, totally.
I really, really, really like I've been bilingual like probably all my life like since i
was like eight or nine years old so uh like that helped me a lot like getting the puns like the
jokes like on scrubs like that's like very very very like it makes it funnier actually yeah right
on yeah right on um well that's awesome man we're very glad to have you and um and and we love hearing that it was popular in in uh in other countries and um and donald and
i have had a lot of fun in mexico multiple times multiple times he gets boozy there because he
drinks too much and he gets i got so drunk in mexico he doesn't know how to pace him one thing
about donald he doesn't pace well in mexico he goes hard, and he's done by 1 p.m.
Oh, my gosh.
Like several times.
Mexico City, Cabo San Lucas.
No, it doesn't matter.
Guadalajara.
Yeah, I got hooked up.
Excuse my language, teacher.
Don't curse in front of the teacher, ass face.
No, no, no.
It's okay.
Yeah, he said it's okay, dick lick.
Listen, vagina nose. Hold on a okay. He said it's okay, dick lick. Listen, vagina
nose. Hold on a second.
You called me a vagina nose?
Shut up, twat ears.
Whoa, wow.
I want to take your ears and call you like a twat.
I have never been called twat ears.
What is that? He's a jerk.
I'm so sorry, Salvador,
that you had to hear me call
twat ears.
You know why I call you twat ears?
because I want to take your ears and just fuck them oh my god
oh my god
I gotta tell you something, remember I mentioned the 8 year old
on 2 by the dozen
that loves, well he came up to me
and he goes, thank you so much for mentioning me on the podcast.
And it was last week's episode.
I was like, you're listening to the podcast?
And he's like, yeah, I love it so much.
It's so funny.
And I'm like, I should have a little chat with your mom about this.
I'm so sorry, children.
All right, Salvador, what's your question, please?
For Donald or for me, Mr. Twatiers?
Actually, it's for, like, both of you.
Like, there was a Friends reunion, right?
And it was, like, super big, broke the internet, and obviously, and all that.
Like, is there going to be a Scrubs reunion like that?
And if so, what are, are like some of the guest people?
Like there have to be like,
there are must.
It's a problem with the problem with the scrubs reunion is that the
hospital doesn't exist anymore.
Like the main cat,
one of the main characters of the show is completely gone.
And so it would be really hard to recreate,
you know,
the nurses station,
the,
you know,
the, but I mean mean they could build a set
that's not that's not what's stopping us from doing no but i'm saying that was a big thing like
the big thing about the from what i understand from because you know i never i'm not a huge fan
of friends but my wife loved the show and uh she said it was really emotional for her to watch them walk into the apartment and walk into
the boys apartment and into the you know and she said that was a big you know those sets were huge
for that show and you know I just feel like we'd be doing a disservice if we just sat in a room
a black room or whatever color room and talk about the show and we're not in the hospital anymore
it's grubs the black room reunion i um yeah we can do a trip to mexico i i think uh salvador
what's more likely what i'm actively working on is uh is me and donald and bill doing a project
together yeah um uh i i i'd love to do is i i we get asked this question I, I'd love to do is I, I, I, we get asked this question a lot. I'd
love to do something with the whole gang from scrubs. If we can, if someone can line it up,
I think probably the biggest thing that impedes it is that Bill Lawrence, who would have to
do the whole thing is so busy with Sarah. No, I'm saying that we could all as actors,
we could schedule two months, whatever, to be in a Scrubs thing, of course.
But Bill, who would have to create it, is so swamped that I just don't, to be frank, I don't see it happening anytime soon.
But I'm really working on this top secret project for me, Donald, and Bill that I'm really excited about.
I think that's, to me, that's more realistic to happening anytime soon.
Right, Donald?
I agree with you.
I think that's probably the way you would see a reunion,
whether it be, you know, Zach and I putting together a show
and then bringing everybody from Scrubs at one point onto the show.
Right.
Or, you know, me maybe or us maybe guest starring on one of their shows.
I don't see-
We're going to do another live show, though.
And we could have,
we were thinking about having one of our co-stars on.
Who should we have on?
Should it be Johnny C or Sarah?
Who should we have, Donald?
I mean, if we could have them both on, that'd be great.
Hold on.
Daniel?
Yes.
Timpani, please.
Timpani. All right., please. Timpani.
All right.
Thank you, Timpani.
August 6th, we're going to do another live show.
Yay!
Thunderous applause, Daniel.
Thunderous applause.
I got it.
I got it, Daniel.
There you go.
So we should let us know.
I know what your answer is if you're listening.
You want both.
So we'll try for both. Let's see how many we can. know. I know what your answer is. If you're listening, you want both. So we'll try for both.
Let's see how many we can.
Well, you know.
No, I think I really feel like when you get too many people on, you know, a call, it gets a little crazy.
It gets a little complicated.
I think two of them would be great.
If not, if one of them is not available, maybe one of them.
Yeah.
So that's the answer, Salvador.
That's the best answer we have for you.
That's an amazing answer.
What's your next question?
Or do you have another question?
Well, I do.
It's like a little improvised.
And I'm sorry for my English.
I'm really nervous.
Your English is perfect.
Your English is perfect.
We were just talking before you got on about how we're jealous of bilingual and trilingual people.
And your English is flawless. So you should feel confident about it thank you thank
you thank you very much uh now that everyone is working like in individual individual things
already and all that how difficult is like to find the same relationship that you have like
that you had on scrubs like like obviously Zach and Donna, like your
best friends, like from the show that you met there, like now that you're working, like, how
do you find how difficult it is? Like, oh, maybe now, now in this technology era that everyone's
on Twitter, on Instagram, like when they have free time, how difficult it is like to, to get to know
people like more naturally than when you were.
I get what you're saying.
I don't.
Tell me what he's saying.
He's saying when you go and do other shows and other projects,
is it easy for you to make friends and are making,
when you do make those friends, is it lasting like you and I's relationship?
That's a good question.
You want to answer first?
Sure.
You know, I've made quite a few friends through work. Nothing is strong as Zach and my bond. Like we have something special. But, you know, you don't expect that when you work with people. Justin Long is somebody whom I truly, truly enjoy talking to. And when we're in the same city i want to hang out with him
um there are a few other people that are like that you know um none so none like zach though
zach that's a that's a special situation like our parents have met you know we're kind of married
in a way you know what i mean it's it's very much like Turk and JD in real life.
But as far as making friends, it's easy to make friends as long as you guys, you know,
especially when you're all in it to win it.
You know, like I love Dove Cameron.
I think she's a great young actress.
And, you know, I love Chloe Bennett.
I think she's a great young actress. And, you know, I love Chloe Bennett. I think she's a great young actress.
And Yana, the girls that I did the Powerpuff Girls pilot with.
And I hope we get an opportunity to do that
just so I can get to know them better.
Because, you know, when you meet special people,
you want to cultivate the relationship.
I will say to that, Salvador, this was such a rare experience
because we spent
nine years together. And it just doesn't happen that many times in an actor's life that you spend
that much time with the same people. Usually, if you do a movie, maybe it's two months.
If you do a show, it might be a couple seasons or something. But it's a very rare experience
to be on a show this
long and get to know people this well. And now what's bizarre in COVID is the crew is all covered
not only in masks, but in face shields. So you don't even see people's faces. It's very hard to
get to know and get close to the crew. I'm hoping that will end this year, but, you know, where
Donald and I talk about
how close we got to the crew
and how much we loved our crew
and we were all friends
and we'd go to bars together
and we would be so social and love them.
It's a bizarre experience
as I'm doing Cheaper by the Dozen
where you don't even really know
what people's faces look like.
Yep.
Like they're behind a mask
and then a facial.
You see their eyes.
Our A camera operator pulled off his mask the other day outside.
And I was like, you have a mustache?
Like, I just, I've never seen his face.
And I spent all day long with the guy.
You would think you know what they look like.
That's the thing that I, that's real talk right there, Zach.
Like, you see all of these cartoons where the ladies are covered from, or, you know, movies where the ladies,
All of these cartoons where the ladies are covered from, or, you know, movies where the ladies, or maybe even your real life, where the ladies cover their whole face and all you could see is their eyes and everything like that.
You don't know what's under that.
You fall in love with the eyes and all of a sudden she takes it down.
And you could be like, that is not what I thought you looked like.
I'm going to be honest with you.
Sometimes the eyes don't match with the mouth.
Not at all.
Or your brain made up what the rest of the face looks like yeah and and and it could be like sometimes you're like okay i didn't know you look
like that right absolutely when i was doing i was i did the l word uh this year comes out in august
for everybody who are l word fans um and we did uh on, everybody except for the actors had to wear a face mask and shield or face
mask and goggles. And I saw one of the people that I talked to every day eating lunch without her
face mask on. And the reason why I was able to recognize her was because I pretended I couldn't see the mouth and nose.
And I just stared at her eyes for a really hard second.
And I was like, oh, shit, what's up?
The crazy thing is when crew members come up to you, they're like, hey, man, remember me from that other project?
And you're like, bro, I'm sorry.
I don't recognize your eyes.
And you feel like a jerk.
You don't want to hurt anyone's feelings.
But you're like, I don't know who you are from your eyes. And you feel like a jerk. You don't want to hurt anyone's feelings, but you're like,
I can't,
I don't know who you are from your eyes.
Like when I have like a,
like a friend request on Instagram or Facebook or whatever, I have like to put up like my finger,
like in the bottom part of the picture.
So like,
Oh,
of course it's that this,
this guy that I met the other day.
God is so crazy.
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your podcasts.
All right, Donald, I think it's time for Mexico's favorite segment.
It's time to arreglar tu vida.
All right, Salvador, go ahead.
How can we fix your life today, sir?
Okay, so both of you, like through the podcast,
I know that you're very nice people.
Like, because I like actors, you're like,
no, I mean, because you have like fans like all over the world
and you're like very nice, very supportive.
Well, we love our fans.
So I would like, and I know that you're very nice people.
And I think of myself as a nice person.
You are.
I can tell.
Thank you very much.
And also, you dedicated your life to being a teacher, which says a lot about you.
Thank you.
And that's the thing.
When I try to meet a girl, I end up being like a...
I give a friend vibe.
And I always end up in the friend zone.
Oh, you get friend zoned.
Yeah.
It's the classic friend zone problem.
Yeah. So I was like friend zone problem. Yeah.
So I was like, how can I come across like, I'm not a douchebag,
but at the same time, I don't want to be like, oh, but I'm always a friend.
Right.
I hear you.
Oh, man.
Well, this is the perfect episode for that.
Yeah, you picked a good episode because this is about.
Dr. Cox gives great advice to Elliot on how to do that.
You know, maybe maybe don't be so accessible.
OK, you know, you're giving him the same advice.
Dr. Cox gives Elliot. I agree.
There's there's just something about mystery that makes you more intriguing and the more access you know the more you're accessible the
more the person has the opportunity to get to know you on your on their terms
and you want them to get to know you on your terms I want you to know me as we
go along I don't want to give too much away at least Salvador there's a
classic Groucho marx quote
i would never want to be a part of any club that would have me as a member
and i think that that's a lot like dating is that we humans uh we we when someone likes us
we're like what's wrong with them it's a matter with them that they're into me? You know what I mean?
Yep, completely.
That's why I have to say, like,
I just broke up with a
girlfriend. Oh, dude, you had
you done. That's what this
really is. You just broke up with
somebody and now you got desperate all on
you when you meet all these other girls.
He's holding up the
Garden State DVD,vd don't interrupt
him go ahead the thing that happened just put on the soundtrack dude and then slowly do the
yawn move with your arm i that has helped me i re-watched it like two months ago and i was like
oh my god that really really really like except the happy ending part but the rest of the movie
is like really what happened uh but she had like the the losing a member of the family part
and i was like emotionally available but a little damage in some other way like but and that like
that's the thing like uh took us apart but so how long have you been single
uh seven months okay well first of all it's been covid and it's been seven months so you got to
give yourself some excuses it's been very hard for any single person to get out there and meet people
but um you know i my first advice is just give yourself lots of opportunities because
you can't just like have one opportunity to to flirt with a a woman and
then a week or something and then and then it works or it doesn't work and then you're kind of
you know you need lots of chances so you have to have to put yourself out there are you on
dating apps and stuff like that uh not at the moment because i'm an english teacher so
there's like some students in the apps too so i I don't want like, well, that's not fair though.
That's I don't,
I don't think you should block yourself from the opportunity to meet
someone because I'm sure there's plenty of teachers on the American apps.
I'm not saying step to your students.
I'm just saying,
you know,
of course don't hit on your students.
I,
you sound like you're smart enough to not to know that,
but I'm saying like,
you know,
I don't think that should preclude you from allowing to participate in the way that most young people are dating these days.
That's not fair to yourself.
Okay.
Yeah.
And I think when you do meet someone, Donald's right.
I think you want to, I think people like mystery.
They don't want to like, I think you might be getting friend zoned if you're just like always available and always accessible and always texting right back and always like the buddy who's available.
You know, even if you have to play a little bit of a game,'s a gentle game in that people like like there to be a game they like
there to be a little bit of a challenge they like there to be mystery and and um and and i do think
you do it's it's like it's like fishing a bit you gotta like throw it out and then reel it in a
little bit and then let it go and then reel it in a little bit right tom is that a good analogy i
love that i love that you that that you agreed with me because I think, you know, my wife played
that game to a T.
Yeah, she worked you so well.
She worked me like, you know, she played me like a fiddle and made it so, it was like,
I would be like, I like you. And she'd be like, I like you too, but not right now.
We can't do this right now.
Maybe next time.
And that made him want her more.
And it was like, okay, well, I know she likes me.
Next time I see her, I'm going to go harder.
And she'd be like, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
Calm down, calm down.
But maybe next time I see you, it's going to work.
You know?
see you okay it's gonna work you know um and you know and that went on for about a year where every time i saw her i pushed up and she told me no no no no no now's not the right time i'm i'm i'm
working but next time i see you i'm sure it'll be the right time and it just worked and now you kept him thinking about her all the
time now she calls me daddy the thing is wow we went there hey another thing salvador is use your
strengths you are are your english is incredible you're bilingual. You have a great job. I mean, I think you can, you can find a
way to, to accentuate things that are special and unique about you. You know, not a lot of, I mean,
not a lot of people are, are, are fully bilingual like you are. I think that's a really cool thing.
I don't know exactly how you use it for your best advantage, but, but, you know, take what,
what's good about what, what you feel confident about in yourself, your interests, things that you're good at, things you love doing, and use those.
So for me, I love the theater.
So when I was dating, and in fact, in my first dates with Florence, too, I would take her to the theater because it was my happy place.
It's what I loved so much.
I wanted to share something I loved so much with someone I really was crazy about. And then we connected over that.
And then you go out for a drink after and you have so much to talk about. So find what that
kind of thing is for you, where you feel you're most confident and your most ability to talk
about it and be passionate about it. And I think passion in that way really lights people up.
passionate about it.
And I think passion in that way really lights people up.
It's attractive to watch someone so excitedly talk about something that they're interested in.
Also at the end of the day, dude, you're a handsome guy.
You got a full head of hair.
You know, you got a great smile.
Go for yours, man.
Be confident.
It's seven months in COVID.
Just remember that.
Be easy on yourself.
And just put on Garden State.
When all else fails, Netflix and chill, buddy.
I do have the DVD also of Remember the Titans.
But that's not a good courtship movie.
No, no, no.
What are you talking about?
It's a good gay courtship movie if you're a gay guy.
Wait a second.
Do you want to snuggle and watch Ryan Gosling's abs?
Ryan Gosling doesn't show his abs.
Isn't there a locker room scene where he's shirtless?
No.
What did I masturbate to?
Oh, you.
Yes.
There you go.
Now you remember.
I want you all to know Ryan Gosling
was a liability for the team.
Let's just put that out there.
He was a liability for the team.
He couldn't guard a snail.
And I stepped in and saved the day.
I love that you're still harping on this.
There's a tradition in Mexico
that every Super Bowl Sunday,
two or three
networks TV,
like they put Remember the Titans
before the game.
See, that's what that's
that's awesome.
That I watch it,
even though I know the dialogues,
I know like all of that is like
it's amazing.
It's like Donald's.
There's Donald,
the guy who dubs Donald.
Does he sound anything like Donald?
I don't watch movies in Spanish.
Oh, of course you don't.
Of course you don't.
I would be so pissed off if the dude was like,
¿Cómo se llama?
Peter Jones,
¿Cómo se llama?
By the way, there is definitely, it's a funny thing because I've traveled, especially when
Scrubs was on all the time, and when I traveled
and would see it dubbed, and I would laugh so much
at how different the voices were from us. Yeah yeah it's like and sometimes like they adapt the jokes
to spanish latin american spanish that is not the same as spain spanish it's not like and it's like
ah they try so hard to make the joke and then when you listen in english like even with spanish subtitles like oh
yeah it's better yeah i'm sure but only a few people like with your um with your ability skill
it at your skillet and languages can have that luxury um all right i think we did it you're
welcome salvador um please let joelle know how it goes send send joelle a picture of you and your
gorgeous new girlfriend when you find her, and
we'll be happy to
give you some pats on the back.
You kind of look like Bruno Mars, bro.
Does anybody ever tell you that?
No, never.
Yeah, I think you should feel confident. You're going to do very well
with the ladies, and the world's opening,
so you'll be able to get back
out there. All right, you can stay on
to the end, because I think we did it Donald
we did the show yeah absolutely
Joel do you feel like we did it?
Daniel anything to say?
it was great
sounds good to me
I apologize for the high-pitched whine if it's there
yeah if you hear the high-pitched whine
blame Daniel
he couldn't figure it out
you can slide into it
blame me
he had an hour and 11 minutes to figure it out
and he could not figure it out
he pushed every little button
hey at least I watched Solos.
Yes! Oh, let's end on that note.
Oh, boy.
Did you like it?
Your directing was excellent.
I thought it was an excellent episode.
It's an anthology, so I have to watch the rest
of them. But I thought
what you put together with
what was a lot of emotional range
to go through in 30 minutes.
I thought it was great.
Thank you.
And so he had the great Anne Hathaway.
I mean, it's pretty easy when you got the great Anne Hathaway doing your stuff.
Listen, she is one very talented actress.
And dude, are you kidding me?
Yes.
Yes.
She won an Oscar from she won an Oscar from a trailer.
The trailer won her the Oscar for Les Mis, man.
The fucking trailer.
Also the fact that he never cuts off of her face
as she sings that solo.
I'm getting goosebumps on my legs
thinking about it.
That was the trailer.
She won an Oscar.
You saw that shit and you were like,
well, she's going to win that shit this year for sure.
She's extraordinary.
If and when you ever do watch solos uh it's sort of a master class um because
she's playing well i don't want to give spoilers but you'll see she does a lot she's fucking
amazing um salvador thank you so much uh we will be back um next time with more fun and laughter
we care about you we love you stay safe be safe. Be kind. A-4-6-7-8.
We've got stories about a show we made
About a bunch of doctors and nurses
And a janitor who loved to hate
I said, here's our stories
That we all should know
So gather round to hear our
Gather round to hear our
Scrubs Rewatch Show with Zach and Donald.
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And I'm Simone Boyce.
And we're here to introduce you to The Bright Side, a new kind of daily podcast that's guaranteed to light up your day.
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