Fake Doctors, Real Friends with Zach and Donald - 518: My New Suit

Episode Date: November 2, 2021

On this week's episode, JD's underachieving brother Dan returns for a surprise visit. In the real world, we're talking pearl necklaces and Superman's orgasm. Learn more about your ad-choices at https://www.iheartpodcastnetwork.comSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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They're very nice. I thought they were, I thought it was a pearl necklace. I'm not gonna lie. You thought someone gave me a pearl necklace? Yeah. Do you mean the literal pearl necklace or the sexual pearl necklace? No, obviously a literal pearl necklace or the sexual pearl necklace? No, obviously a literal pearl necklace.

It doesn't look like the sexual pearl necklace. The sexual pearl necklace looks more like ropes. Have you ever given a pearl necklace? Have you ever given either kind of pearl necklace? Sorry, Joelle. I think we should go around the room. Let's go around the room. Has anyone here ever received or given? Let's go around the room. Let's go around the room. Has anyone here ever received or given?

Let's go around the room. I don't think you can ask. These two are quote unquote workplace friends. Indeed. But we can ask each other. I know how HR works. It goes like this.

You and I can ask each other. But the minute it goes into the other people that are on our podcast I feel like iHeartHR I feel like iHeartHR and be like you can't ask Daniel and Joel if they've given or received Joel can't give if they've received products.

Can you imagine that call? Hey guys, it's iHeartHR. Show's great by the way. One note. One tiny note. You can't ask Dan and Joelle if they've received Pearl Necklace. Oh, boy. Dan, this show just started.

It just started. Did you have fun doing our live show? I had a great time doing a live show. I'm not going to lie to you. I was nervous. I was like, how are we going to top the last one? Zach's talking about all of these freaking secret guests. I know one of them is going to be Bill.

I'm hoping, like, I was thinking it was gonna be like bill krista and uh sarah but rob and aloma that's a great role that's such a great we would have had sarah too uh listeners just so you know uh and those of you who watched it but she was shooting her new fancy show and my fly lane and michael spiller was directing her. So there you go. Oh. So Mike Spiller wouldn't let her out. He actually texted me. He's like, sorry, I can't get you Sarah. I'm like, you dick.

Wow. That's a dickhead move, Mike Spiller. But anyway, listen, until Bill fucking ruined it, were you surprised about Aloma? So funny. I was so surprised about Aloma. And even when Bill ruined it, that shit was funny, man. She was so funny. I didn't realize she was going to be so sassy. She was sassy. I know the character is sassy, but Aloma. And even when Bill ruined it, that shit was funny, man. She was so funny. I didn't realize she was going to be so sassy. She was sassy.

I know the character is sassy, but Aloma was sassy. She was sassy. I think there was a little bit of pent-up anger for the, you know, she was like, I bought an Escalade. I was thinking about her Escalade. I assumed she leased it, and then she just had to turn in the lease or something. That sucks.

I felt bad about that. I wouldn't tell that story, but Bill made me tell that story. Bill was like, tell the story. For you guys who are wondering, you'll have to watch the live show and listen. Well, they can listen. By the time this airs, they won't be able to watch anymore. That's right. You can listen. Indeed.

Wait a second. Aloma, yeah, she did have some pent-up hostility about being killed. Yeah. There was a little bit of, y'all killed me. But then she did say, Bill, thanks for my retirement. That was nice. Well, yeah, it was a great, I mean, she was on for, did she do nine seasons or did she just do the eight? Like, who went on to do the ninth?

I don't know. Did Rob go? I wasn't there. Was Rob on that season? I don't know, dude. I don't remember the ninth season go? I wasn't there. Was Rob on that season? I don't know, dude. I don't remember the ninth season. I really don't. Joel, can you look that up?

Did Aloma and Rob did season nine? I don't remember. Yeah. No problem. I'm sure Rob was there. Rob wasn't going to fucking be like, sorry, I'm moving on. No, didn't Rob go on to do, he was doing soaps at that time, wasn't he? Wasn't he doing soaps at the same time as season nine?

No. Yeah, he was. Yeah. Ask Bill. This is an ask Bill 9? No. Yeah, he was. Yeah. Ask Bill. This is an ask Bill question. We could ask Joelle to Google, but okay. Bill and... How about we ask Bill...

Bill takes forever and then never fucking replies. This is so long in the future. Daniel has to track him down for months. Often I do. Yeah. Hey, Daniel, can we hook up a thing where we can call Rob live during the show? I feel like he would answer the phone and we could ask him questions. Yes, we could if somebody wants to hook their phone up to their Zoom.

So we can certainly sort you out some equipment to do that. Can you send me the gear that would enable me to do that? Yes. Because I think it would be funny to, like, let's just randomly call Rob and see what he's doing. Or we could randomly call Bill or randomly call Johnny. Yeah, we could randomly call people. That's a nice new feature.

That's a great new feature. Hey, Fake Doctors Real Friends fans, we've got a new feature coming. It's called the random call. What you trying to get into? What they assume? You know. What you trying to do. What you trying to get into? What you trying to do? The random call. Anyway, my friend has a crystal company that I'm going to shout out solely because she sent me lots of free crystals.

Vibes.store. I just spelled vibes. Just like vibes, the word? V-I-B-E-S.store. If you're into crystals and crystal stuff. So I don't know anything about the power of crystals, but she said if I wear this long, what Donald called pearl necklace, they're clear.

They're not pearl colored. And she would tell you exactly what it is. Maybe it didn't have enough protein in it. Maybe it didn't have enough. Oh, my God, Donald. And she also sent me these to wear. I've had them all on all day. How do you feel?

I felt good. And then Florence FaceTimed me, and she's like, why are you wearing all of those beads? And then I felt less good. I felt like a topless girl at Mardi Gras. But you know what? I was feeling a little, I was feeling stressed. And I was like, you know what? I don't even know if any of this shit works, but I'm going to just put them all on and see what happens.

Joelle, do you believe in crystals don't even know if any of this shit works but i'm gonna just put them all on and see what happens joelle do you believe in crystals uh yeah i have many of them they're all over the place in my room i like holding them weird story my grandpa died holding like he had this worry stone he called it he's constantly like if he was set or whatever he would just rub it uh he died in a plane crash he was holding it so i have that and that sort of started my love of like different rocks and crystals and gems and stuff wow well i'm open to it especially when my friend sent me a box full of different stuff there is even a straw right a metal straw with a crystal on around the bottom of it and you put in your drinks and your whatever you're drinking gets the magic from the crystal. Whoa. Cool.

I'm down. You know what it sounds like to me? What? A little. Da, da. Da, da, da. I thought you were going to go different. I thought you were going to go to when Superman goes to his weird.

To the Fortress of Solitude. That's another one. What an uncomfortable place. By the way, here to his weird to the Fortress of Solitude what an uncomfortable place here's my memory of the Fortress of Solitude not if you don't feel cold here's the thing now do you know what a Papa San chair is? no alright well if you're listening and you're curious Google a Papa San chair

they were very popular they sold them at like you know, those stores that sell international, like world market kind of thing. It's like a big bowl, wooden bowl, with a cushion in the wooden bowl, and you could move it around different shapes. Oh, yeah.

Can you picture what I'm talking about? Yes. Okay. We had one as a child, and as a little kid, I thought it was the coolest thing. We'd play it and pretend it was a spaceship, the whole thing. So I see Fortress of Solitude, and I'm like, I remember thinking as a child and as a little kid I thought it was the coolest thing. We'd play it and pretend it was a spaceship, the whole thing. So I see

Fortress of Solitude and I'm like I remember thinking as a kid like this looks cold and not cozy and then he's hooking up with what's her name and he's in basically a papasan chair with satin sheets.

He bangs Lois in a satin sheet covered papasan chair. But after he lost his powers. Really? He doesn't have his powers then? There's no way he could have sex with her with his powers. Why? He'd shoot her across the room? He'd kill her.

Wait, is that a thing? Really? Come on, man. He's a superhuman alien. So I don't watch any of these. Henry Cavill doesn't ever have sex? Not yet. They've had sex, from what I understand. But I imagine he has to take it really, really easy.

Yeah. It wouldn't be like having sex with another Kryptonian. I imagine with another Kryptonian, it's like thunder clapping. Boom! Every time. Boom! Boom! Right? But with Lois, he has to be real gentle. This is Superman coming. And then Lois...

Lois, fly by. Fly by. And then Lois' vagina is like you honor me you honor me you honor me oh my goodness on that note five six seven eight about a show we made about a bunch of doctors and nurses and a janitor who loved to hate. I said here's a story that we all

should know. So gather round to hear our, gather round to hear our Scrubs Rewatch show with Zach and Donald. Mm-hmm. Oh man, I always know I'm going to laugh with you guys. Even when I'm racing to get here on time know I'm going to laugh with you guys.

Even when I'm racing to get here on time and I'm so stressed about, like, oh, do I take enough notes? I always know I'm going to giggle with you fools. Where were you today? I am, was, am, was location scouting in New Jersey for my new film. Cool. Can I ask you? Okay, so here's a question I have.

Go ahead, Donald Faison. I call on you. cool can i ask you okay so here's a question all right go ahead donald faze and i call on you so i start doing this this uh show and i'm writing it i'm pretty much show running it and everything like that but now these auditions are coming up yeah but i'm doing so much i'm focused so hard on the show that it's like wait hold up i don't necessarily have time to focus on these lines like i wanted to that's ridiculous you think that's ridiculous you think of course it is your show is is well it will be success i'm sure because you're so talented but you you've got

little mouths to feed and acting is your specialty and you gotta you can't be phoning in these auditions right it's hard to find when you're show running it's hard to find time to do it all at you know what i mean is what i'm finding and it's it's it's it's it's very very difficult to juggle the schedule i know man i know but that's what that's what happens when you hustle at a high level yeah bill lawrence is like is literally running four shows. Right. It's insane. And he's got three kids and a wife.

Yeah. That's tough. That's the thing. Now it's like, all right, I definitely want to still be a successful actor. I definitely still want to put the work in that's needed to do that. But I really want this show to be successful and good. I really want people to enjoy it. You know what I mean?

Well, you got to practice your time management because I'm telling you, I'm looking at a lot of auditions right now for my film. And if the person is not off book and not memorized and not prepared, they can't possibly, and this is a lesson to you actors out there I've said it before can't possibly compete with someone who's clearly worked on it and clearly like we saw but Johnny sees the extreme like hiring people to come in and fucking play all the other parts and putting on a metronome and that's like the most mega version I ever heard

but like you see people that come in and you're just like drop jawed at how much work they put in how much thought they put into it how fucking off-book they are that they're feeling comfortable riffing and then there's other people holding lines like this and you're like, dude, you can't possibly

compete with the dude who just came before you. No, there's no way. There's no way. Sorry, and the last thing I'll say is especially in this whole audition move to Zoom world because it used to be back in the day, you went in the room, you made them laugh, you bonded, you had the chit-chat

that if you're charming like you, can buy you a lot of mileage. Maybe. Now it's just Zoom. It's like, hey, how are you? All right, here we go. Right. That shit's so weird. It's my first time doing as a director, obviously,

because the only other thing I made during the pandemic was solos and Anne Hathaway didn't exactly audition. And she didn't have to know she was attached. Okay. And so, you know, I've never done this auditioning people over zoom before, which is very odd.

Of course, the actors are used to the whole rigmarole, but me as a as a filmmaker it's such an odd experience it's an odd way to do it right yeah so that's the that's the thing it's like all right how do i find time to focus on the show to where i feel comfortable you know i want to be like george lucas to this, but still holding myself accountable enough to, before I go to bed, making sure I know my lines for the audition I have in the upcoming days.

Yeah. Well, I would say don't do it right when you're tired because no one wants to do shit when they're tired. I would say you've got to look at your week. I think paper calendars are really helpful for some people. They certainly are for me. I like to look at a big-ass i think paper calendars um are really helpful for some people they certainly are for me i like to look at a big ass calendar of the week or the month and you can say like okay i got this audition on that day if i'm gonna get those lines down i at least have to do two hours on this day okay so i block those hours out okay now you know and

just schedule the shit out of it right if you can't just do it on a whim because you're gonna be like oh fuck i'm just gonna play this video game for a second. All right, I'm just going to watch a second of that game. All right, I'm going to fuck around and hang out with my kids for like three seconds. And then you're tired. Then you're done, yeah. Just, you know, food for thought for all of you out there who have busy schedules. I'm wondering how you make it through.

What's your thing? Zach says keep hustling. Zach says hustle harder. Well, listen, this is an expression that I've heard before that I really truly believe. Are you ready for it? I'm listening. Some of you have heard it before, but maybe some of you haven't. If you want to get something done, give it to a busy person.

Because they're in the fucking space of i got this to do then i gotta do that i got this someone who's not busy is like later i should probably memorize the lines you know but when you're in like fucking hustle mode and you're like okay i gotta do this i gotta do that i gotta do this i gotta do that you're fucking you schedule your shit and you get it down that's but you should definitely not be slacking on your auditions, man. You're too talented to be phoning anything in. That's the last thing I want to do right now is to phone in anything. I'd rather not do the audition than phone it in.

All right, should we talk about the show Scrubs? We should. It's called My New Suit, and it was written by Tim Hobart, very funny man, and directed by Victor Nelly Jr., very talented director. Yes. And I laughed a lot in this episode, Donald. Did you?

You didn't. I had to watch it. I did not. I had to watch it twice. And the second time I laughed, I laughed more. I didn't think at first. I was like, this isn't that funny. You know what I mean?

It's a contained episode. There's not a lot that happens. It was probably one of those, hey, we spent a lot of money on last week's episode. We need one that's a little cheaper. Yeah, well, but they brought in Tom Cavanaugh, you know what I mean? And it's like, I don't know. I didn't get Tom's role in the show until the very end.

It's about tough love. Yeah. I think the episode is about tough love. Right, but I didn't get that until the end. A lot of the stuff I understood with Elliot and her telling the kid, you know, dude, you lost that weight. If you lost that weight, it would be easy for you to get in here. But because you didn't, you got to go to the zoo. That must be a real thing.

I mean, that maybe wouldn't have made that up. That is so fucked up. Yeah. Hey, you know, that's how it goes thing. I mean, they wouldn't have made that up. That is so fucked up. Yeah. Hey, you know, that's how it goes sometimes. I know. I'm not saying that it isn't what they need to do, but I never heard that. And I'm sure they didn't make that up, that if someone is as big as that young man is, they have to take them to the zoo for an MRI.

For an MRI, yeah. Yeah. Anyway, so I got that, and I was like, wow, that's a hard pill to swallow for anyone to have to hear something like that. Are you able to do that in your life? Are you able to say the shit that someone really needs to hear, even though it's going to be so uncomfortable and you don't want to hurt their feelings? Sometimes. Sometimes. Sometimes it's, well, this is a lesson that you have to learn on your own.

I think I hide from hurting anyone's feelings probably too much. I live with Casey Cobb, and you know she don't play that shit. She's a straight shooter. We don't play that shit at all. Casey always says, what is Lizard's expression? She goes, what's the phrase she says, Donald? Which one? When she's about to drop a truth bomb on your ass.

No judgments. No judgments. No judgments, y'all. Oh, that's sometimes when she's talking about herself. She'll be like, all right, no judgments, y'all. But da-ba-da-ba-dee-ba-da-ba-da-ba-da. And yeah, she's a straight shooter. So you have your wife you can lean on.

You can be like, we got to tell this person that this. Well, she's the one that's like, nah, you should mind your business. Or she'll be like, yeah, you should tell that person that. I feel like I'm so worried about hurting anyone's feelings to mine in their detriment that I don't say things sometimes that need to be said. that I don't say things sometimes that need to be said. You know? Because if everyone's tiptoeing, if everyone's friends are tiptoeing around saying something,

then they might not know. They really truly might not know. But the worst part is when it goes down, like let's say it's a girl or it's about somebody that you're dating and, you know, everybody's like, you should break up with that person secretly behind your back. And then when you guys find when the person breaks your heart or something like that, everybody's like, you know, we were thinking this shit for a really long time. And your response is, well, why didn't you tell me? You know what I mean?

Oh, well, we didn't want to hurt your feelings fuck that shit but then you still got to tread carefully because you know what happens they get right back together with the person and you unloaded right and then right and then you told them everything that's the most fucked up shit i learned at a very young age oh man do not pillow talk do not pillow talk no matter who you're with. Don't do it. Wait, I thought pillow talk is when you're lying around in bed with your partner and talking at night. Yeah, but you could talk shit with people. Like you talk shit to a girl like, oh, this person's horrible or such and such. Because next thing you know, that shit's all around.

Somebody else heard that shit from somebody else. Oh, yeah. Because you broke up oh the worst part is like someone someone breaks up someone breaks up and you're like okay look i didn't want to hurt your feelings it was none of my business and then you just unload all this shit right and then they're like yeah yeah and they're like swiping away their tears and then the next day they're like we got back together you're like it all sucks dude all right so what's going on in here we got a hamster um now we got a hamster doug found the hamster in a dead guy's colon which means the man was

doing that thing that some men do i guess or do. What's that called, Joelle? Hamstering? That is, I do not know. This is what I don't understand. How does a rodent. I think you put a tube in your ass. Doesn't a colon have, well, I'm not necessarily, okay. Before we even get to how you get the rodent up in there.

I think there's a tube. I want to know, okay, right. you get the rodent up in there, I want to know. Okay, right. How does the rodent live in the anus? You know those hamster things, habitats? It's like a yellow tube that the hamster would normally go to its bedroom in. Like, I'm off to bed. But instead it enters the anus cavity. Yes. It's called gerbling.

Gerbling. Gerbling. Gerbling. How do you gerble, Joelle? Can you tell our audience if they want to try this? Whoa! Actually, don't try this. Don't try this at home, please. It's on Wikipedia.

Dear fake doctors, real friends, listeners, this is an alert that this is not something you should try at home. Yes, don't do this at home. Don't do this at home. Seriously. No joke kidding. People go to the hospital for this. Joelle's face is horrified.

Joelle, give us the cliff notes. How did you do it? On the Wikipedia page, it says often the rodents are given a psychoactive substance such as cocaine prior to being inserted. You give the gerbil coke. Okay, step one. Step one. Go on. I never heard anything in my life that was

step one, give the gerbil cocaine. Okay. Oh my god. That's not even step one. It's step one. Buy cocaine. Not for you, but the gerbil. Step two, buy gerbil.

Step three, give gerbil cocaine. Something comforting to listeners. Dan Savage, who is a sex advice columnist who frequently discusses unusual sexual practices, stated in 2013 that he's never received a first-hand or even a second-hand account of the practice. So maybe no one's done it and it just lives in fantasy land. People do it. I've heard stories of people. Well, you've heard stories. You don't have first.

That's true. No one was like, bro, you're not going to believe what happened to me last night. But what they got to understand is, and I'm going to say this in a non-graphic way, audience, you're not going to believe what happened to me last night. But what they got to understand is, and I'm going to say this in a non-graphic way, audience, don't worry. Once the gerbil on Coke is inside your rectum. Yeah, what's supposed to happen then? What then happens? I guess him or her running around on Coke feels nice to some people.

In your gut? In your gut? In your intestines? In your an in your in your intestines in your anus in your butt yeah i mean think about it a lot of people like a lot of people like scratchy it feels like well maybe you declaw is declaw the fourth step oh man jesus we're just piling on the layers of animal cruelty on this no we're not saying you should do this. Hold on. Don't do this.

Disclaimer. Don't do this at home. Yeah, no one's going to do this. No, no. Don't do this. But if you do. You honor me. No, listen, don't do it.

Oh, no. Okay, so anyway, moving on, since it's the first moment of the show. Right. And then they find Doug in the fetal position. He goes, why would he live in there? Right. Why? Elliot likes to role play that she's trying to get pregnant.

This is her new role play. Yeah, it's her new role play. Keith is so understanding. Keith is having fun. What about when fucking Tom Cavanaugh tries to have a threesome and they cut to Keith stretching. And he's stretching, getting ready to go in there to make it happen. Folding his shirt.

Yeah. He's like, I want shit. That was the funniest moment of the show. Tom Cavanaugh shows up at their house. Elliot's in very sexy lingerie. And Keith standing there. And Tom Cavanaugh misreads the situation. Like, all right, I'm in.

I'm like, he's down to have a threesome. He walks to the bedroom, starts jumping on their bed. And Keith is like, Elliot, you have to warn me about these things. But he doesn't get mad. He enters and starts stretching. Then she closes the door and heads that way. She heads that way, closes the door. At first, that was my question at first was, did they have the threesome?

But then later on, they say it almost happened. I think that they added that for protection of Elliot's character or something. Right. Okay. Well, I mean, because it's way funnier if they had a threesome. If they did have the threesome. I guess it doesn't work story-wise because Tom Cavanaugh needs to be rejected. Right.

So I never got this story about breaking the fourth wall. Yeah, spiking the lens. I get the joke. I get what it is that it's trying to do. But then even at the end of it where he's like, we'll be right back. And the patient goes, was he talking to us? Yes. It is pushing. If you think of the red line where Scrubs pushes reality, it's definitely sticking your toe over the reality line in a way that we don't normally do. Because in the world of cinema and television, when someone's looking directly into the lens not always but let's say

for the most part you are looking at the audience and that's what the joke is obviously but it's not something we normally do very often on scrubs it's rare if but i laughed i laughed i mean the first of all the whole americo thing was funny was funny. I want to know what America thinks. It's AmeriCo. And of course I like it. I made it. Yeah, and then someone goes, why is he here? Is that me?

I forgot. But like, why is my tailor? No, you go, he's a dynamite tailor. That's your next line. Why is he in the ICU? Who lets the tailor into the ICU? I don't know This place must have so many germs

Well, it did It did Yes, but then I like We'll be right back Right Is he talking to us? No, no, don't care Yeah

Okay, now We already discussed that Tom Cavanaugh is back Yes, and Herbert Who is is the obese patient, who's very charming. Also from the wonderful movie Old School. He was in that. Oh, was he the guy in Old School? Yes. I think he might have also been.

It's not him. It's his brother played Hercules from The Nutty Professor. Hercules, Hercules. Oh, really? It might be his brother played Hercules From The Nutty Professor Hercules I think it's his brother though Hercules Now there's a new beautiful Nurse or intern I think she's

I think she's a nurse She might be an intern I don't know what she does But she's a new character Right and she has crossed Ted She might be an intern. I don't know what she does, but she's a new character. Right, and she has crossed Ted. She crossed Ted back in the day. And Ted says, you turned me down 14 times for drinks. Well, who's the creeper loser now?

He is still. Yeah, it's still you. I mean, this is a straight-up HR episode. You can't ask somebody out 14 times at the workplace. That's just. I mean, you might get one. What about all the conversations Ted has with his mom in this episode? It's so weird.

Yeah. Right, Joelle? You're making that face. Yeah, I know. It's horrifying. He's talking about rubbing lotion in dry places. They share a bed. It's not good.

Yeah. Let's get back to him asking her out 14 times. Yeah, you can't do that. You can't do that, can you? Just like we can't ask these guys about pearl necklaces. Joelle, how many times can you ask somebody out before it's sexual harassment

at the workplace? Once? That's it? Unless you Unless the person asks me later like, oh, I'm not sure right now. You should probably just stick to one time. You know what I mean? Yeah, I think once is a good rule, everybody. Although I did ask my wife out several times before she said yes.

Yeah, but you know why that's an exception? First of all, there's two exceptions. You didn't work together. Second of all, you were definitely getting flirty vibes back. And if you can read the vibes that's like correctly and you're not misreading them, you might go, okay, I'm going to try again in a month. I feel like that's gotten a lot of people in trouble though where they've been like, you know, I thought I was reading the flirty vibes correctly. You know what the problem is? This is why we can't endorse this too many people can't read the vibes right there you go yeah thanks again dan i'll speak to that i i agree with

everybody's point here is that like i think casey and donald's scenario is certainly unique and that there was a friendship there there was certainly something going but well but also this was like night sorry before you continue this is like nightclubs and parties and like you know this isn't like a fucking cubicle job right right sorry dan i'll continue no no totally fine but too often people hear no and they hear and people get a no but what they hear is okay i'm gonna try again in like a week and see what happens it's like no you gotta know that means no you move on you say okay thank you for your time sorry to bother you see you next tuesday see you next tuesday wow you call it that's not sorry that wow okay i apologize wow that is literally okay you know what's really funny about that that is not what i meant by that what i meant by that was

literally like okay i was i should have said see you on monday should we take a break on mond? See you on Monday. Yes. We'll be right back. And when we come back, I want to talk about Tom Cavanaugh's piercing blue eyes. They were really bright. His skin was really white and his eyes were really blue. He has the most beautiful eyes. We'll be right back.

When you find that bright spot to help you get through your day, it's powerful. That's where The Bright Side comes in. To help you get through your day, it's powerful. That's where The Bright Side comes in. A new daily podcast from Hello Sunshine that's bringing you a daily dose of joy. I'm Danielle Robay. And I'm Simone Boyce. Listen, both Danielle and I are reporters.

We've covered the news and we know the world can feel heavy. But The Bright Side podcast is a space to have a little fun, to learn something new and get into some friendly debates. That's right. Join us five days a week to see how life can look from the bright side. We'll hear from celebrities, authors, experts and listeners like you. Whether it's relationships, friend advice or figuring out how to navigate life's transitions. We'll talk through it all together. Life's transitions. We'll talk through it all together. Listen to The Bright Side from Hello Sunshine every weekday on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

All that sitting and swiping, our backs hurt, our eyeballs sting. That's our bodies adapting to our technology. But we can do something about it. We saw amazing effects. I really felt like the cloud in my brain kind of dissipated. There's no turning back for me. Make 2024 the year you put your health before your inbox and take the Body Electric Challenge. Listen to Body Electric from NPR on the iHeartRadio app or wherever you get your podcasts. Parents, if you've ever experienced bedtime battles with the kids, I'm going to let you into a little secret. I'm Abby, a mother of two, and I had these battles myself.

Endless excuses, delay tactics, and many tears and tantrums. But I've created a solution. The perfect kids podcast that makes bedtime a dream. It's called Koala Moon, and it's hosted by me, Abby. With over 300 episodes packed with original stories and sleep meditations, Koala Moon makes bedtimes easy and enjoyable. Episodes start out engaging and really rather magical, but as they progress, they gently slow to a calm and relaxing pace to have your little ones out like a light.

Since launching in 2022, Koala Moon has helped with over 20 million night's sleep and received over 6,000 five-star reviews. Win back your evenings. Listen to Koala Moon now on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. If you've been following the news, you know that from health care access to safe schools, LGBTQ plus rights are under attack. And it's about time queer and trans youth get the microphone and tell their stories in their own words. I'm Raquel Willis. Join me on my new podcast, Queer Chronicles, a show where LGBTQ plus folks tell their own stories in their own words.

This season, teens will share all about growing up in political battleground states. I wish I could feel more comfortable in my own body here, teens will share all about growing up in political battleground states. I wish I could feel more comfortable in my own body here, but that's just not the case. And follow along as they discover what queer and trans liberation means to them. This isn't running away from yourself. It's running into who you want to grow into. Listen to Queer Chronicles on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your most fabulous shows.

We watch your wisdom and don't know. And we're back! And we're back! Daniel, did you intend to say see you next Tuesday? No, I did not, but it does remind me, my professor in psychology in college, our classes were on Thursday and Tuesday.

At the end of every Thursday class, he would say, all right, see you next Tuesday. And that was always something funny. And you guys would always laugh? Did everyone giggle or just you? I would say by 50-50. I bet 50% of the people listening don't even know what we're talking about. But Google it, because we're not going to get in trouble here

so Turk can't contain himself he has to tell JD about Angie so Carla and Turk have decided that they're now going to name this baby in her belly they don't know if it's a boy or a girl

but Carla has already decided on the girl's name and it's going to be angie and she asked turk asks turk if he wants to name the if it's a boy if he wants to give the baby a name and he's like yeah absolutely say hello to fuquan fuquan yeah and she's like no no no no no i meant like i was thinking more like george and he's like yeah sure george is fine he's like because i was thinking for a girl she's like no no no no no angie we already came like George. And he's like, yeah, sure, George is fine. And he's like, because I was thinking for a girl. And she's like, no, no, no, no, no. Angie, we already came up with the name.

He's like, we're fine. We've already came up with the name. She tells him, don't tell no one, because if you do it, they're going to fuck it up for us. And I don't want that. I want this baby's name to be ours, and that's it. And he's like, absolutely, I will not tell anyone. And you know exactly who he's going to tell the the minute he says instantly you can't hold it in

for two seconds not even a second he runs to jd who is in room in a room with a patient and interrupts uh the patient and uh doctor time to tell jd if we have a girl we're gonna name it angie now this is a question i have for you as a parent of so many children. Aren't you supposed to keep the name quiet? Because otherwise everybody weighs in and says, oh, I knew a guy. Don't do that. Oh, this creepy guy's name that. Oh, I hate that girl.

Name that. Everyone's got an opinion. Yes. You are to keep it to yourself. Yes. You are to keep it to yourself. And usually from what I've like, we didn't know Rocco's name until a few weeks out, you know, and we didn't know Wilder's name until a few days out, you know. And some people don't know until the baby's born. And so, you know, but I would keep it to I would keep it to myself because everybody has a story about someone you know what i mean right you'd be like

i have a friend i have a you know it it just it never goes well when you're like well we were thinking about this name somebody's always going to be like well you know i didn't know that one person named it's funny amanda was broadcasting that she loved elvis for so long and we were all cringing. I was like, Amanda, no, no. Unless you're obsessed with Elvis. She's like, I like Elvis, the musical legend, but I don't. It's not like I'm a mega fan.

I just love the name Elvis. And she did it the opposite way. She was trying to run a campaign, clearly on Nick as well well but also the friend group and uh and now i love it but at the time i remember being like amanda no so that's what you don't want you don't want the friend being like no dude not fu kwan well yeah i mean not just or or you know naming a hamster after the baby either you know what i mean? Well, that's what's so funny. By the way, it's very rare that anyone outside the main cast

gets a fantasy. It isn't a fantasy. It's a flashback. And this little girl playing with the hamster gets a flashback. And it gets to me playing with the kids and the hamster that we should name the hamster Angie. Yeah. They're asking, what should we name it?

And you're like, oh, I got a perfect name. We should name it Angie. Now, why do you think JD did that? I don't think he did it consciously. I think it was subconsciously. Like, the first new thing in his brain was Angie. He's like, how about Angie? All the kids go insane.

That shit was hilarious where they're walking by and they're like, who wants to hold her next? Me. I get to hold her next? Me, I get to hold Angie next and turn and Carla stop and backtrack into the room. What's it called? The ass gerbil? The ass gerbil Angie. Angie the ass

gerbil. How about when I go, but what about Tiger? So you apparently are telling everyone you're related to Tiger Woods? Right. This goes on for a while, though. I think they're like three quarters related. Like there's a, he's a quarter. I don't know what it is, but. Oh, you mean it comes back in another episode?

Yeah, this comes back a couple of times. How about the gay test where you play Macho Man? Right. I wonder how much money they spent on that graphic to have that baby dancing in that freaking uterus a lot because you know we're not known for our visual effects and that was pretty good right but that was okay so that was pretty funny this might be the funniest thing in the show you said you thought it was the threesome thing i want to talk about the janitor's adopted brother named Cleet. Yes.

Boy, you're cutting ahead a lot, but okay. Okay. The janitor's parents, they adopted a 46-year-old. Yes. He was older than they were. He was older than they were. And his name was Cleet, and he did odd jobs around the house. Right.

Talked like this. All the time. Talked like this. All the time. Everything was great until the janitor's mom slept with Cleet. Yeah, because when they got, because Cleet, when he got older, him and the janitor's dad

just used to fight all the time. Yeah. They just started fighting all the time. I don't know if you can legally adopt. No. No. it's called. No, it's called letting somebody live with you. That's right. No, there's no, no.

I just want to know, can you legally adopt someone who's over 18? No. Yes. What? I can adopt a grown, a grown man. I want to adopt you, Donald. It's an acknowledgement of parenthood. And fun fact, queer couples way back in the day used to do it

in order to get rights to visit people in the hospital and stuff. It's not done frequently, but it has been. So it's done as a loophole type thing. It's a loophole type of situation. I love

my parents and I acknowledge the fact that I am I know but what if I what if I adopted you and you had to call me dad daddy oh boy I would I would

I would I have some say in the adoption I'm sure of it Keith wears two condoms because he's so worried about getting Elliot pregnant now

puts on a third one now one thing I do know those of you listening is that wearing two condoms is actually not good. Dangerous. It's not good.

It's not advised. It's dangerous. It doesn't make you double protected. Right, Joelle? No, the friction between the two condoms is more likely to cause a rupture. There you go. Use one condom. It's enough.

One condom. But do wear a condom, everybody, okay? one condom. It's enough. One condom. But do wear a condom, everybody, okay? Unless you both have gone and got tested and you're willing to have a baby. Yeah, and you're okay with having a baby.

How about when Elliot and Keith are having sex, Elliot says, promise me you'll hold me like this when I'm pushing our baby out of my pajinga. She's so twisted, Elliot. By the way, Keith, this woman was a completely different character sexually before Keith.

What is it about Keith? I mean, I know Travis is very handsome, but what is it about Keith that has brought out the freak? He's down for whatever. He's down for whatever. I have a theory that Elliot hit her dirty 30s and just took off. So wait, okay. Well, clearly, because every other season,

every other season, she was like prudish, she claims. Okay, we're going to do a little bit of a reveal here. Go ahead. As of recently, my wife has gone over the top when it comes to sexual relations. Zach, I love

you. Why? How so? Let's just say she's gone over the top. It's been good before and we've been... Listen, we got two kids, so you know the sex is good. We're putting it in. You know what I'm saying?

We only know you had, that only proves you had sex twice. Everybody's going to be like, he's twerking. But, no, but, you know, it's recently, like, she's having way more fun than I can remember in the last. And she's not 30. Oh, thank you very much. And she's not 30. So you say it's the dirty 30s. I think it comes when.

The shorty 40s. Whatever it is. I don't know when it happened. I don't know what you call it. Everybody was like, you know, I don't know when it happened I don't know what you call it You know, everybody was like You know, I have a very I have a very I have a very high

Sex drive, we know Everyone in America knows But you're saying she's meeting you She's meeting you where you are Well, she doesn't necessarily meet me where I am Otherwise no one would have a job in your house But When it happens When it happens She doesn't have to necessarily meet me where I am. Otherwise, no one would have a job in your house. But when it happens, it's fucking, it's a party, dude.

That's amazing. Have you tried the Whirlybird? I want to try the Whirlybird. I'll spot you guys. I'll wear a blindfold and spot you guys. Will you? Yes. I'm coming to LA, by the way, for the Emmys.

Do you want to do it this weekend? This weekend might work. All right. Ask Casey because I'm coming to town for the Emmys. Ask her if she wants me to spot you guys for the Whirlybird. I'm definitely willing to put on Bose noise-canceling headphones and goggles, blinding goggles. I can't wait. So my point is...

I can't wait. My point is Elliot has reached this level, and she just reached it at an early age. You know what I mean? She is freaking out. But sometimes it's the partner. Well, yeah. Well, definitely.

Look at him. He's a fucking Ken doll, man. And he's bendy, and he's... And he's got dynamite areolas. We know that. You know what I mean? I mean, she's human. It's not like, you know what I mean?

I'm sure she has fantasy. Just because she's a woman doesn't mean it can't be fulfilled. Right. I'm just saying sometimes when you get with a specific partner, like you can have great sex with somebody else and you would call it great sex, but then there's something about the chemistry between you and a specific partner

where you both are just like... Fuck it, I'll eat the ass. I'll do it, right? Oh my God. Is that too much? Did I go too far? You honor me. Did I go too far?

Wait, say it again. Fuck it, I'll eat the ass. That's what. Did I go too far? Say it again. Fuck it, I'll eat the ass. What? Mm-hmm. Did I go too far? No. Am I going too far? No, no, no. I don't think that's going to bring in iHeartHR.

It was just the pearl necklace. No, that's good. Now, Harrison and Winston, we learn, wear Tonto and Lone Ranger jammies to bed. Harrison and Winston. Harrison? First of all, here's the funny thing, right? Harrison's new boyfriend is named Winston. Winston.

And they dress up. They dress up. They sound like the two people in the freaking balcony for the Muppets. Harrison and Winston. They dress up as Tonto and Lone Ranger not to go to a costume party, but also reports that's their jammies. At the end of the episode, the picture is Randall Winston and his husband, Michael. Now, if you pause, you'll see that they're dressed up like the Lone Ranger and Toto. They're dressed up like the Lone Ranger!

But also that it's getting complicated because if you're really staying in the Scrubs universe, Winston must be the twin brother of Leonard, the security guard with the hook. The security guard, yes. Yes. yes so maybe harrison met him when visiting his dad at the hospital yes on the same day that that leonard the security guards brought twin brother winston this is some deep this is the kind of shit you fools do with star wars and marvel like okay so leonard's twin brother must have met Harrison at the hospital. The timeline does fit. The timeline does fit. What do you call it?

It's not a multiverse. It's not a multiverse situation. The timeline fits the occasion. Okay, so here it is. JD names dead guy's butt hamster Angie. I couldn't find it. They say that Turk is the greatest pink bellier in all the land. Yes.

I remember shooting this. Do you remember shooting this? You really did it, didn't you? No, I didn't. We faked it. But I remember shooting it. I remember having to do it. I remember Victor being like, keep going, keep going. I was like, really? How long do I got to do this for? Oh, because you're going to do it i remember victor being like keep going keep going i was like really how long do i got to do this oh because you're gonna speed it up

right i think you did it really did it like once or twice and i was like no you're not doing that it really fucking hurt that would really sound like i don't mean to sound like a wimp but it hurt that would really hurt how about that door hit did you that was a fucking major door hit and that was me when you guys wonder why you guys wonder why I'm going to the chiropractor at 46. It's to make you all laugh. That was a fucking hit. No, it was a hard one, too. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Don't say I didn't give you my all, everybody. I was going to say, you know, naming kids is fun, but that shit's hard, dude. All honesty, you know, the dynamic of pissing your partner off because you like a name like i i at one point did bring up luke and leia to my ex-wife and i remember her face looking at me like you gotta be fucking kidding me like i did you like rocco right away yeah well casey came up with the name casey was like what about rock no no we were talking we were watching rocky that's what happened and i was like what do you think of rocco and she's like i

like rocco oh and she was like and then she talked to her grandmother about it and casey's italian and sicilian and her grandmother was like that's a very nice italian name sweetie oh that's good all right so the baby names made it real for uh for carla and turk all of a sudden they start panicking the second they had names they switched from being panicky to oh shit this is real yeah you know the closer you get to the end of the pregnancy the more realistic it starts to become. At first, it's like, yeah, okay, sure, there's a baby in there. But then you start feeling kicks. You've come up with names. You're starting to pick out all of these clothes. The freaking furniture starting to arrive. All of these things, you're starting to change your house around or your apartment around to make space for the child and everything. get real really really really fast and you start

panicking i've been panicking for a really long time about my kids you know what i mean and it doesn't go away i have adults and it still doesn't go away i still am nervous you know you still feel panicky about your older children yeah i worry I worry about the choices they make, you know? I guess all parents would probably feel that way, maybe. Yeah, man. It's like it doesn't take much to make one mistake that could be fatal. You know what I mean? To make a fatal mistake.

It doesn't take that much. It's so hard because you can't control their choices. You can't control what they do out in the world. I can imagine that would be so stressful. It's so stressful. Especially when you have a teenager because it's like oh how are you gonna like think of you think about what you did as a teen and you're like oh my god i did some stupid shit imagine they're doing that well just all of the you know just all of the ways i would you know you know i a daughter. I have two daughters. And I'm lucky. My older daughter has a boyfriend

who seems to really, you know, worship her. And I'm very, very lucky for that. But I worry about this dude doing some dumb shit and me having to fucking run up on him. You know what I mean? I'll pull up. You know what I mean? I have no problem doing that.

I'll pull up on a little kid, too. I'll pull up on parents. I don't give a fuck, man. Like, you know, my daughter comes home and says, you know, such and such was mean to me today. Immediately, I'm like, who's mom is that? Whose dad is that? Who's the dad? What's the dad's name?

To my wife. And she's like, baby, you can't. And I'll be like, I will pull up on these motherfuckers. I have no problem. And I'll be like, I will pull up on these motherfuckers. I have no problem. Like, you just can't. You can't. The thing that Turk and Carla are going through, you go through for the rest of your life.

Like, I saw a meme. It wasn't a meme. It was a TikTok where this girl gets in the car and her mom's sitting there waiting for her. And the girl gets in crying. Her mom's like, what happened? What's the matter? And she's like, I got jumped. Oh, she said, oh, yeah?

By who? She said some girl. She said, how old were they she's about 12 her mama said okay bet i'm 12 now too let's go oh no you know what i mean that's real talk man you just have that i'm afraid to have kids i don't i don't i can't handle this pressure it's it's you it's it's real, man. Daniel, you're next. He is. I'm next. Congratulations. Do you have any names in mind? Daniel's kids will probably be named like Zelda.

Zelda's a beautiful name. Oh my gosh. Or Link. Link and Zelda. Zelda and Link. Oh have twins. Link and Zelda. And Link. There you go. Oh, that's me. All right.

Do we have a guest caller today, Joelle? Or are you not going to record their sound? Wow! Turn it off! Sorry, shots fired. We're recording right now. All right, let's take a break. And then we'll talk to someone who will be very interesting.

We'll be right back. When you find that bright spot to help you get through your day, it's powerful. That's where The Bright Side comes in. A new daily podcast from Hello Sunshine that's bringing you a daily dose of joy. I'm Danielle Robay. And I'm Simone Boyce. Listen, both Danielle and I are reporters. We've covered the news and we know the world can feel heavy.

But the Bright Side podcast is a space to have a little fun, to learn something new and get into some friendly debates. That's right. Join us five days a week to see how life can look from the bright side. We'll hear from celebrities, authors, experts and listeners like you. Whether it's relationships, friend advice or figuring out how to navigate life's transitions, we'll talk through it all together. Listen to The Bright Side from Hello Sunshine every weekday on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. All that sitting and swiping, our backs hurt, our eyeballs sting,

that's our bodies adapting to our technology. But we can do something about it. We saw amazing effects. I really felt like the cloud in my brain kind of dissipated. There's no turning back for me. Make 2024 the year you put your health before your inbox. And take the Body Electric Challenge. health before your inbox and take the Body Electric Challenge. Listen to Body Electric from NPR on the iHeartRadio app or wherever you get your podcasts.

Parents, if you've ever experienced bedtime battles with the kids, I'm going to let you into a little secret. I'm Abby, a mother of two, and I had these battles myself. Endless excuses, delay tactics, and many tears and tantrums, but I've created a solution. The perfect kids podcast that makes bedtime a dream. It's called Koala Moon and it's hosted by me, Abby. With over 300 episodes packed with original stories and sleep meditations, Koala Moon makes bedtimes easy and enjoyable. Episodes start out engaging and really rather magical, but as they progress, they gently slow to a calm and relaxing pace to have your little ones out like a light. Since launching in 2022, Koala Moon has helped

with over 20 million night's sleep and received over 6,000 five-star reviews. Win back your evenings. Listen to Koala Moon now on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. If you've been following the news, you know that from health care access to safe schools, LGBTQ plus rights are under attack. And it's about time queer and trans youth get the microphone and tell their stories in their own words. I'm Raquel Willis. Join me on my new podcast, Queer Chronicles, a show where LGBTQ plus folks tell their own stories in their own words. This season, teens will share all about growing up in political battleground states. I wish I could feel more comfortable in my own body here, but that's just not the case.

And follow along as they discover what queer and trans liberation means to them. This isn't running away from yourself. It's running into who you want to grow into. Listen to Queer Chronicles on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your most fabulous shows. And we're back! All right, Jo joelle bring us a guest we got a caller who gave us a holler we can talk star wars or sing show tunes you know like a baller smoke some jazz cabbage maybe talk about the episode so come on, Joelle, let's get the show on the road

Ladies and gentlemen, give it up for Carolyn Odom! Hey, hey, everybody. Good afternoon. How are you? Hi, Carolyn. How are you? Aloha. Hello, hello. Welcome to the program. This is Fake Doctors, Real Friends. That's the Donald Faison.

And of course, you know, the legendary Danalyn Joel. And that is Zach Braff right there. Zach Braff wearing a crystal necklace that supposedly is going to give me energy and powers. How's that working out for you? I don't know. I need to take it off and see if I feel any change. But I kind of feel like it looks like Mardi Gras beads, but with a little tassel. I like it.

But I like it. I think it's giving me power. You know what it kind of looks like to me? It looks like the Kung Fu beads from like the Saturday morning Kung Fu television shows that I used to watch. With a feather at the end. You wrap that around a freaking like a spear or a sword or a sword yeah sword and it's freaking uh freaking it sounds like a wu-tang clan album wu-tang forever wu-tang forever wu-tang forever carolyn

welcome to the program um Where are you calling from? I am calling from just outside of Columbus, Ohio. Okay. Yes, not super exciting. I moved here about a year ago for work during quarantine. What do you do for work? Where did you move from? I asked the questions, Donald. Calm down.

All right, we'll start off. Release the fight the question is where did you move from and what are you doing in Columbus beautiful I moved from Cleveland so not a very big move you know I love Cleveland Carolyn you know because you've talked about Mabel's before he only knows the two

restaurants that's not all I know I've been to the casino. I've done it all. All right, Carolyn. What do you do for a living? I'm wicked. So I am in clinical research. So I'm a senior director

of clinical development at a biotech. We develop and research gene therapies for rare pediatric diseases. Wow. So rare pediatric diseases. Wow. So rare pediatric diseases, you're working on discovering medicines for them? Yeah, exactly.

So the primary disease that we're studying right now is called Krabbe disease. It's a globoid cell leukodystrophy. It's a very rare and catastrophic pediatric leukodystrophy. What is that? I'm sorry. In layman's terms, what is that? What does that happen? What happens to the child? What does that mean?

Yeah. So loosely with these children, unless they are caught with through newborn screening programs and crabby is actually only part of newborn screening in nine states at the moment. These children will be born typically developing, you know, 10 fingers, 10 toes, hitting everywhere they should on their outbar, et cetera. And then as they grow older, the disease is very rapidly progressing. So the parents will notice that they are starting to fall behind on milestones, et cetera, and

we'll start taking them into the doctor to get their diagnosis. My previous company up in Cleveland, I studied a couple of different mucopolysaccharidoses and those ones have a much later onset. They're lysosomal storage disorders. And so basically your body is constantly producing cellular waste. And so your lysosomes are in there kind of recycling, right? But with these lysosomal storage disorders, your body, you're missing the enzymes or the proteins or the genes that should be doing that recycling. And so that cellular waste just builds up. Yeah, I'm sorry, but just because we don't know anything,

even though we're pretend doctors. What is that? How does that manifest? What happens to the child? Yeah, so with Crab A disease, a lot of the early symptoms are the children will have difficulty eating, swallowing, breathing, moving with some of the other leucodystrophy, excuse me, other lysosomal storage disorders. It's a much later onset with

Crab A. The onset is very young and very rapid. And so, you know, roughly 90% of these children will pass away by age two. Oh my gosh. Oh my God. And it's not something that anyone, you said only six states are screening for this. Nine states right now. So if anyone's listening and can they ask, I mean, cause I'm sure there's people that are pregnant or listening to you. They're like, oh my God, what do I do? What do you ask your pediatrician or gynecologist about? Yeah, so with these, different states have different options that you can add to your standard newborn screening panels. There's something called the RUSP. It's the Recommended Uniform Screening Panel.

And that's kind of oversight from the federal government that mandates what should be included in each state. kind of oversight from the federal government that mandates what should be included in each state. And then each state has their own kind of flexibility in what additional tests they screen for there. And I don't want to scare your listeners. I mean, Krabbe is an ultra rare disease. It's rare, but I'm saying if they happen to be listening to this, they could say, hey, if you're doing the RUSP, can you add a test for what is it called? Krabbe? Krabbe? Krabbe. K-R-A-B-B-E. I would. And so there's nine active right now, you know, but then it's really challenging. There are some petitions up right now to get Krabbe added to the rusk, but there are petitions for a lot of rare diseases at the moment, trying to get them

included. Really? I wonder why, this is probably a stupid question if you're in the medical business, but why not add them all? Why does the RUSP have to be limited? So kind of two main reasons. One, depending on how frequent the disease is or how well it's been studied, there might be a high rate of false positives or the diagnostic screening criteria might not be well enough defined. And so you don't want to give somebody bad news if it's not really true. And then, you know, and they, they really tend to shy away from diseases that don't have cures. So if there is no cure for this disease, there's some ethical considerations about whether or not the families would want to know there's a standard of care for um crab a

disease it's not a cure but it is a oh but you just released or you just said something that's sort of a a darker side of this is the ethical concerns of telling someone that their child will only live to two right correct like a vault i don't know if we can go down that road carolyn i'm gonna start crying it's supposed to be a comedy podcast here you know stuff can you tell them very quickly why you wrote in and what you're hoping to do yes go ahead yeah so i actually have cool stuff um that i wrote in about um this actually worked out really perfectly that i'm able to be on the show today because i'm celebrating an anniversary. Happy anniversary. What is it? Thank you. One month

ago today, I donated my right kidney to a stranger. Holy cow! Let me see the scar! Just kidding. No, no, no, no, no, no, no. He's always asking inappropriate things. I have been flashing everyone.

No. I had to talk to him earlier about speaking to I have been flashing everyone. No, Carolyn. You're so cool. I had to talk to him earlier about speaking to our coworkers in an inappropriate way. No, no, no. I was talking to you. You can't ask a woman you just met to show a scar. Sorry, my dog is. Aw, sweet.

She heard exciting voices and had to look up and say hi. That is a very cute dog you have there. Very cute. So wait. Okay. Oh, my goodness, Carolyn, how did this come about? It actually came about through my dog, actually, which is very good timing. She just didn't even know it. So one of my hobbies is I'm a puppy raiser for a group called

Canine Companions for Independence. And what I do in my volunteer role is I take in puppies when they're about eight weeks old. I raise them until they're about a year and a half to two years old. And then I do all their basic socialization training. They go as age appropriate. They go to work with me. They go to the grocery store with me. They go on airplanes with me. They go, you know, anywhere I go, I've always, always for the last six or so years, I always have a dog at my side. And so then at the end of the time that I have them, I take them into one of our local training centers. They do six or so months of actual professional training, and then they go off and become service dogs.

So for the blind or for other things? Yeah. So the group that I'm with, we do primarily, we do mobility dogs. So for people who have, you know, amputations, wheelchair users, et cetera. We do hearing dogs for people who are hearing impaired, but we do not do any seeing eye or guide dogs because there's so many groups out there that do such a great job with all of that. And so, so you guys filled a, uh, filled a spot that was necessary, uh, training service animals that weren't for the blind. Yeah. And so since I don't do any work with, um, visually impaired, uh, service animals, I follow a bunch of different groups on Facebook, right? Cause like I was going to learn about stuff that I'm not actively. You seem like a

pretty angelic human being and we already know how how this is going to end but go ahead my ex-husband would have something other otherwise he better not need a kidney because you got none left to give no i'm down to so my left kidney side note i have named it jeffrey bean morgan jeffrey bean nice jeffrey bean okay so go on that's funny jb morgan i got it Jeffrey Bean Morgan. Jeffrey Bean. Nice. Jeffrey Bean. Okay, so go on. That's funny. J.B. Morgan. I got it.

Get to the point where you gave a kidney to a stranger. Yeah. So for a few years now, I've followed this one group, this one Facebook page about this woman living in D.C. who's got a seeing eye dog. And it's really cool to read about her adventures and see kind of what, you know, get a glimpse into how somebody else lives. And then in March, she posted a personal plea from her personal

Facebook page onto the dog's Facebook page saying that she needed a kidney. And, you know, it's been a really shitty couple of years. Right. And I don't know, just something about her post just kind of struck a chord with me. And it was a couple of days after my 39th birthday. So I was already in that like, oh, my God, I'm about to turn 40. What am I doing with my life? What have I done? Right. What have I done with my life?

Who am I supporting? I haven't made a difference. What's the quickest way I can make a difference? How can I a difference? How can I fix 2021? Yeah. And so there was just a little link in her post to an online questionnaire. And I'm like, well, you know, it's like a Tuesday afternoon or something and I'm procrastinating from work. And I'm like, I wonder what kind of questions they can ask you on an online survey that'll tell you about, I don't know if you can donate a kidney. I'd never thought about this before.

So I click on the link. I fill that out. I end up passing through the first few online stages. They sent me mouth swabs. I did a bunch of mouth swabs, sent those back in. And about a month later, I got a call saying, hey, so you're a match. Can you come in and do all these crazy medical tests with us? Wow.

Yeah. Okay. So how is your relationship with this lady now, with this seeing eye dog? Oh, my gosh. So that was really crazy because, I mean, I didn't even know her real name. I'm sorry.

I lost one thing. Is she a trainer of seeing eye dogs or she uses a seeing eye dog? She uses a seeing eye dog, yes. Oh, so she's a blind woman she's a blind woman okay so that woman is not only blind but is in dire need of a kidney that's incredible i have questions um you they must have told you what could go wrong we've did we did this on scrubs it can things can go awry for the donor um were you nervous about that you must have been what was your thinking about that? Do you know what? That's so crazy is that not once, like there was no fear. Like this was just a really empowering and really exciting process. I think, you know, cause I, cause I work in the

medical field and part of my job is designing the informed consent documents for our clinical trials. Right. So like, I, I know all of these. I actually also last year I got COVID. And so I joined a clinical trial for people who had COVID because obviously I want to help with that research. So I'm actually still in a clinical trial for something else right now. And they let you and they let you do the surgery, even though even. Wow, that's amazing. And so how does this how does this affect your clinical trial? Even, wow, that's amazing. And so how does this, how does this affect your clinical trial then? Now, does this move you into a different level in the clinical trial? Because now you only have one kidney, like, you know what I mean? Like, I don't know. I guess the clinical trial didn't have anything so that was, yeah, it's completely separate. I'm just in long-term follow-up. I got the monoclonal

antibody back in January. How is your life in any way different with one kidney? Is there anything you have to do differently or feel differently? In the initial post-transplant, I mean, I'm at one month today and I'm obviously... You look amazing. You look happy. Are you single? You mentioned your ex-husband. Are you single? I am single. Oh my goodness. You guys got to date this woman. She's beautiful. She's pretty much a saint. She might give you a kidney. Well, she can't give you

a kidney, but maybe a liver. Maybe a liver. I can tell you where to find one if you do need one because now I've been learning so much about this community and the donor world. It's been really sobering joining a lot of these support groups and seeing how many people do not have happy endings like this. It's really rare that you meet somebody who's not only in the medical field, but also has donated part of their body to save another person's life. I could give a kidney to a, I mean, I'm sorry, Carolyn,

I could give a kidney to a loved one or a family member if they needed it. I don't know that I could do a stranger. I mean, you're a saint. No, but no, because that was a question that a lot of people had for me, you know, too is, well,

why would you give a kidney to a stranger? Why don't you save it for a, save it. That's kind of funny. You might need it for a loved one. I never heard anyone say it like that. That's their own rationalization though. That's their own rationalization.

I would do it, but I'm hanging on to it just in case. Don't get me wrong. I personally would, but my mother's not looking great lately. Yeah, but it's great because with this, and it's a little different for me because this was considered a directed donation because it was specifically for this one woman. But if I had done it altruistically by just joining the National Kidney Transplant Registry and signing up through there, they have a voucher program. So Zach, let's say that tomorrow you decide to donate a kidney, get on the register. Yeah. What do I get? How much do I get?

If you match anybody, you get a, you get actually a lot of really interesting stuff, but you also get a voucher that can be used for your family. So that if down the line, you have- Well, what about me? What if I need a kidney all of a sudden you'll be fine no i mean i wonder if it's happened that someone's given a kidney like you and then they then their kidneys fucked it absolutely doesn't you end up getting moved to the top of the register i would hope so that's like the fast pass you get a fast pass you're a-okay um if something like that happens wait do you get don't people um sell their kidneys not legally in the u.s oh um and that's actually part of like they are the tests that you go through to do this are bonkers i mean like i'm healthy i don't really go to the doctor beyond, you know,

occasional like annual whatever. But oh my God, this is like the first time I did CT scans and all these crazy testing that you have to go through psychological counseling. You have to go through like, yeah, like different financial counseling so that you're fully aware of any potential. Who pays for, sorry, sorry to interrupt you because I'm just fascinated, Sorry to interrupt you because I'm just fascinated, but who pays for all of this? Are you out of pocket? No, the recipient's insurance covers everything. I think in total, I was out of pocket for maybe $100 worth of stuff.

And the only reason for that was there was some, I mean, the testing process was long, long, long. And I was overdue for a pap smear and my PCP was super backed up because everybody's overdue or everybody's backed up with everything for COVID right now. And so mad props to Planned Parenthood because I reached out to them and explained that this was the last thing I needed before I could do this surgery. And they fit me in within a couple of days. Wow. That's up there. All I'm getting out of this is that Donald and I aren't good enough people.

No, you aren't a good enough person. I'm fine. Why don't you put your ass on the registrar then? You want me to put my ass on? You want me to donate my butt? Yeah. Actually, someone would probably take your ass. Can you donate ass cheeks?

Postmortem, you can absolutely donate skin that can be used for skin grafts or similar. No, we said ass cheeks. Cheek itself. I am unaware of any Bible.

That's like a scrubs fantasy, actually like someone someone says you can have all my organs and my ass and my ass cheeks kind of like front butt front butt front butt when you find that bright spot to help you get through your day it's powerful that's where the bright side comes in a new daily podcast from Hello Sunshine that's bringing you a daily dose of joy. I'm Danielle Robay. And I'm Simone Boyce. Listen, both Danielle and I are reporters. We've covered the news and we know the world can feel heavy. But The Bright Side podcast is a space to have a little fun, to learn something new and get into some friendly debates. That's right. Join us five days a week to see a little fun, to learn something new, and get into some friendly debates.

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you get your most fabulous shows. All right, well, you're incredible. I think we should, for the interest of time, skip questions, but we could do Fix Your Life if you want. Do you need your life fixed? Or do you have questions? Or do you have questions? You can pick. All right. All right. All right. You know, I did have some questions, but again, in the interest of time, so my recipient was supposed to join today and last minute, she wasn't able to, which was super disappointing. We met for the first time less than 12 hours before surgery. I mean, it was. Joelle, you almost programmed the best show ever. You got like 80% of the way there.

Inches. It was so well. Well, I give you 80 percent props. Thank you. I was super, super, super disappointed. She wasn't able to make this, but she did ask me to share one thing. Go ahead. I'll use my remaining time for this, which is that she was really fortunate in that she had this social media

network where she was able to put out a call for a kidney and a stranger saw it. Right. Cause she's got a pretty decent social media presence, but there's so many people out there who, who don't. Right. And the, there is such just drastic, drastic inequality against with transplant, transplant in general, with the differences between deceased donor donations against like what I did, which is obviously living organ donation. And so her big call is just for people to think about ways to make the transplant process more inclusive and equitable for both recipients and donors and thinking that, I mean, the numbers are staggering. 14 people join the National Transplant Registry every day. 20 Americans die from kidney disease waiting for a transplant every day. The average wait for

transplant is three to eight years. And during that three to eight years, you are on dialysis day in, day out. I mean, it is- Okay. So how can people who are as saintly as you, who want to do this, where do they go to register? Yeah. You can go to kidney.org. That's the National Kidney Foundation website, or you can go to just kidneyregistry.org. You can learn loads more about the process and I totally get it. I'm so fortunate that I was able to do this because I don't have any kids. Right. I just I have two dogs and a cat. Right. So I didn't have to worry about caring for somebody during my recovery. I have an amazing employer. Shout out to Tim Miller, who gave me all the time off that I needed.

I was actually back at work within a week because I was feeling really good. within a week because I was feeling really good. But somebody who gave me paid time off and all the space I needed also for all of my appointments, et cetera, everything leading up to this, like this stars just aligned perfectly that I'm in a place where I was not negatively impacted financially, physically, emotionally, psychologically, whatever, that I had such an amazing support system across the board. Yeah. And most people. You're amazing. I have to keep mine in case something happens to Donald, but I, I do think that a lot of people should sign up for this at kidney.org or kidney registry.org.

Absolutely. Carolyn. I, you know, you do so much for so many people. I hope you have, I hope you have a lot of someone out there that's doing something as wonderful. Yes, Carolyn, are you on one of the dating apps?

Maybe we can set you up. We had a love connection. I'm not doing this to get her a date, dude. I'm just saying, man. No, but maybe we can help her find love. But maybe that's not what she's looking for, bro. I'm just saying. Everybody wants love.

I just hope you have somebody in your life or a group of people or friends in your life that are as supportive as you are for complete strangers. You are an amazing person. I think you are awesome, Carolyn, for real. I have an amazing support group. And also, the puppy raising community is really, really tight. And so all of the other puppy raisers in town have been bringing me food and taking my dogs. It's like a Hallmark movie, Donald.

I was going to say. Donald and I are going to sell this to Hallmark, Connor. We'll cut you in. It's like a Christmas movie. Seriously. How my dog saved. It's got everything you need. It's got a beautiful woman giving her kidney to a blind stranger and puppies.

Yeah, and a comical moment with a dog. Yeah. Lots of comical moments with the dog. I'm just waiting. We're hoping to go visit the recipient this week. It'll be the first time we've seen each other since the transplant. I can't wait till you guys are friends and you can stop calling her the recipient. You know what?

I'm honestly just doing that because we're on here and she's not here. So I wasn't comfortable using her name. No, totally understand. She's not here, but well, if she hears this, if she hears this,

um, uh, we are so happy that you're doing well and so happy that there are people like Carolyn out there who, uh, who are saints on earth. I think one thing you can do is make sure that you're on the organ donor list. Unless that's against your religious beliefs, of course.

But I really, you can make sure, it's usually on your driver's license, if you were to die, and they can harvest and save lots of lives with your organs. And unlike scrubs, they most likely won't have rabies in them. Right, they'll test them first before they just don't amount. Absolutely. Postmortem organ donation there. Everybody can have my

kidney when I die. Both of your kidneys, not just the one. Yeah, everything. You can take everything. Just leave my hair. I want my hair. It's going to fall out anyway. I know, dude. I'm not an idiot. Come on. It's going to fall out anyway. I know, dude. I'm not an idiot. Come on. It's going to fall out anyway. Didn't you see Goonies?

Sloth! Hate! Zack! Chester Copperpot had no hair left. All right. I wish that octopus would have killed you, Zack. Carolyn, thank you so much for coming on the show. We have killed you. I love it. Oh my God. All right,

Carolyn, thank you so much for coming on the show. We really appreciate you. Absolutely. Thanks for, thanks for letting me on and letting me share this story about living organ donation. It's been a true life changer for me.

And hopefully this will inspire some of your listeners. I bet it will. I bet, I bet you just made a big difference in a lot of people's lives because this show gets heard all around the world. And I bet you inspired other people to do the same. I don't know if you know this Carolyn, but we're a really popular pod. Yeah, we're very huge. That was a humble brag.

I only missed one podcast. I missed the live episode last week, but I watched how dare you, but that is literally the only episode I have missed since March of last year. Yay. Wow. Awesome. We appreciate that. All right. Thank you so much for coming on. Be healthy. last year. Yay. Wow. Awesome. We appreciate that. Alright, thank you so much for coming on. Be healthy. Take care. Bye.

Wow, dude. We're not good enough people. Alright. I gotta get my shit together, dude. With the amount of doctors that you guys have inspired over the years with the show and the amount of lives that those people have inevitably saved with your influence. And maybe Carolyn just inspired people who do have

the courage to do something like that yes yeah holy cow she's that is an amazing amazing and she saves children right like it's like but that's that's the that's the thing that's the thing that's it's like you're already doing good work. You had to step it up another notch, huh? Listen, everything she does is amazing. Yeah. Everything. When she's not working on helping to find cures for rare pediatric diseases, she's training puppies for handicapped people.

Yeah. Truly. And when she's not doing that, she's donating organs. This Hallmark movie is going to be fire. Dude. Oh, my God. It's got three things. It's got puppies. She's donating organs. This Hallmark movie is going to be fire. Dude. It's so much fun. Dude. Oh, my God. It's got three things. It's got puppies.

It's got babies. And it's got kidneys. I think Amanda Kloots could play her. I agree. Yes. Perfect. It's an Amanda Kloots Hallmark movie. Bam.

Let's do it. Done and done. Who doesn't want to see that? Wow, you guys. Joelle, we mentioned that you're good at pitching. Can you go pitch that to Hallmark? Let's go. I got this.

I got this. We just did. We just did. Hallmark, we got the movie for you. We need to Hallmark? I got this. I got this. We just did. We just did. Hallmark, we got the movie for you. We need a Hallmark. We often have Hallmark movie ideas. We need a Hallmark executive to be listening to the show. Yes.

Because we're just pitching them free shit. Email us at scrubsihart at gmail.com, Hallmark. Yeah. Listen, I don't want you stealing our ideas. If I see this story on Hallmark, I'm going to see your ass. You're dead to me, Hallmark. You're dead to me. Love it.

We're going straight to Lifetime. Casey Cobb will watch the shit out of this movie on Hallmark, especially if it stars Amanda Clutes. Love it. All right, guys. That's our very wacky show. We love you very much. Donald.

Five, six, 7, 8! Hi friends, I'm Danielle Robay. And I'm Simone Boyce. And we're here to introduce you to The Bright Side, a new kind of daily podcast that's guaranteed to light up your day. Every weekday, we're bringing you conversations about culture, the latest trends, inspiration, and so much more. We'll hear from celebrities, authors, experts, and listeners like you.

Whether it's relationships, friend advice, or figuring out how to navigate life's transitions, big and small, we'll talk through it together. Listen to The Bright Side from Hello Sunshine every weekday on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. All that sitting and swiping, our backs hurt, our eyeballs sting. That's our bodies adapting to our technology. But we can do something about it. We saw amazing effects. I really felt like the cloud in my brain kind of dissipated. There's no turning back for me. Make 2024 the year you put your health before your

inbox and take the Body Electric Challenge. Listen to Body Electric from NPR on the iHeartRadio app or wherever you get your podcasts. Parents, if you've ever experienced bedtime battles with the kids, I'm going to let you into a little secret. The Koala Moon podcast has revolutionized over 20 million bedtimes, with parents like you calling it life-changing and the perfect nighttime routine. With original kids' bedtime stories and cozy sleep meditations, every episode has been specially designed to make bedtimes a dream. Listen to Koala Moon on the iHeartRadio app, on Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. I'm Raquel Willis. Join me on my new podcast, Queer Chronicles, a show where LGBTQ plus folks tell their own stories in their own words.

This season, teens will share all about growing up in political battleground states. We will always exist and we will definitely not let them take away our joy, no matter how hard they try. Listen to Queer Chronicles on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your most fabulous shows.