Fake Doctors, Real Friends with Zach and Donald - 601: My Mirror Image
Episode Date: February 8, 2022On this week's episode, JD tries to process his new reality as a father. In the real world, we're joined by writer Tim Hobert! He's an old friend of Bill's and he wrote this episode. Learn more about... your ad-choices at https://www.iheartpodcastnetwork.comSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
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There he is.
Wow.
Oh, my goodness.
Today, audience, we have a very, very, very fancy guest.
Dude, how are you still so thin?
How is this possible?
How is this possible that you are still a svelte, young-looking man?
I have an IV in my arm right now.
I don't know if you guys can see that.
What happened?
Oh, no.
I was a bit dehydrated and so needed to get an IV in order to get back to one.
Water doesn't always work.
Water doesn't always work.
I love those.
Tim, you know about those?
You can go to a place or you can even pay more and have them come to your home.
I'm sure if you don't live in L.A., they probably have this in a city near you.
But you can go get fluids.
You can go get hydrated.
You can get vitamins.
If you're super hungover, you can go get a hangover concoction.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Yeah, there's one of those right up near my house.
Yeah.
Do you ever use it?
I do it all the time. Yeah, yeah, yeah. There's one of those right up near my house. Do you ever use it? I do it all the time.
I don't. I do it when I feel
a cold coming on and I go,
oh no, oh no, not now, not
now. I go and they give you like,
they just blast you with vitamins.
It feels nice. Right. So Zach and I have something
coming up that we have to take care of
and I'm trying to get
like,
I'm going to tell you something.
Tim, I don't know about you, but I don't work out like I used to.
You look good.
No, not like you do.
Pause one second.
This is Tim Hobert, everybody.
We're on season six.
Now we're really up in the game with Fancy Guess.
Tim was one of the best writers on Scrubs,
and he is one of Bill's best friends, and he's just an all-around great guy.
And I didn't want to even bother Tim to come on the show until I heard through the grapevine that Tim actually is a fan of the podcast.
I am a big fan of the show.
Tim, tell us how great we are.
Well, let me tell you, and I wrote some stuff down.
I learned about this.
I'm not very technological, so I don't do a lot of things on my phone.
But I learned about this during the pandemic, and I started listening to it.
And it brought me unbridled joy.
Oh, good.
You guys, I can't wait to see what the next... I know you're talking about
what the next podcast is going to be.
We don't know.
I'm enjoying the shit talk
with the New Girl podcast as well.
Yeah, well, I also follow
our... Oh, sorry, Daniel,
did you meet Tim? That's Daniel.
Indeed, we had a nice conversation
before everybody got in. We wanted to make sure that
Tim was set up to record.
Pleasure to meet you again, Tim.
Tim, very few of our guests, and I would introduce Joelle, but I don't see her.
She may have checked out for a second.
I'm sorry, I'm here.
Just doing a quick message.
That's Joelle.
Tim, you're one of the first guests.
I just want to give you a compliment.
Who's ever figured out sounding good right off the bat?
You don't seem to be having
any you know from the show that sarah is the worst culprit you are you are really uh and getting an
a plus so far also gabby fucked it up eight ways to sunday oh gabby didn't gabby gabby lied that
she'd ever even she didn't watch the show she never watched it she didn't even know what she
was coming on to do i mean no clue what she wrote the episode and she
didn't watch it and zach you said something very funny which i was listening to you had the british
people on they were telling a story about how one of them loved scrubs and she had never seen the
show and you said that's okay neither has gabby you guys mercilessly just killed her. Well, it was very uncomfortable.
It's hard to do the show.
And I assume that not only since you're a fan of the podcast and you wrote the fucking episode,
that you might take the time to review it.
And it's known as the Gabby example now.
Yes, Gabby sets the example.
By the way, I think Gabby may have indirectly made Donald and I
not want to have writers on anymore.
Well, also at the end of the show, you were talking to that couple from England that were both doctors, and you were talking about how medical marijuana is legal in England.
And Gabby just screams out, and abortion.
You can get an abortion.
And Zach, you go, I'd personally personally rather smoke weed but you do your thing
i'm telling you guys that guy's funny tim i have we have so much to talk about um
donald i don't even know where to begin with tim it's so i'm so excited you're here
okay so i i have a bunch of questions I have to ask him.
One,
what year did you join? Season
two? Season three?
Here's my thing. I only joined season
two of Neil Flynn shows. So
I got on season two of Scrubs and season
two of The Middle. Wow.
That's your specialty. That's why I haven't worked in a while.
I'm waiting.
Because Neil Flynn's not on a show. Yes. He has to get a show and have to wait a year wait weren't you working on psych a little bit also
no that's callahan callahan that you're mixing up your white writers
your white non-jewish uh comedy writers there's only drink and we fight and we fight
and then we fight and we drink and then we fight some more.
You running around in that leprechaun outfit singing that was one of my favorite memories of Scrubs.
That was, I mean...
You were running around in a leprechaun outfit
going, we drink and we fight and we fight and we drink.
Then we fight some more.
We joined season two
and we should mention very importantly
that Mike Hobert, Tim's little brother,
is Lonnie.
Lonnie, yes.
The pizza delivery guy.
And the pizza delivery guy.
One of the very few human beings to play two different characters on Scrubs.
Unless, you know, you heard this, Tim.
We debated whether Lonnie had then gone on to medical school.
Oh, yeah.
From his pizza delivery pilot experience.
That's got to be on Scr scrub's wiki that he was in
the pilot as a pizza delivery guy no it is it is we discussed it and donald and i said is he one of
the only people in scrub's history to play two different characters or did lani the pizza sorry
did the pizza delivery guy from the pilot go off and go to med school and become lani yeah i mean
they're both possible i mean i love listening to you guys deconstruct the way this shit happens.
Well,
we're about to do it with your episode,
but wait,
I wanted to ask you,
um,
when,
when did you leave us to do the middle?
Uh,
so I wrote the first episode of season six and then I went off to develop.
Um,
and then I ran that Brad Garrett show for a year and then I went to Brad
Garrett.
Oh,
it was like, it was called till death to Brad Garrett. Oh, it was like,
it was called till death,
which was a good,
it was,
it was very apropos because he only went one year.
No,
it went a hundred episodes,
but he,
he tortured me.
Oh,
you didn't have a good experience.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Freaking that,
that commercial with him and Tommy John.
What the hell?
I mean, he, he was super nice.
He gave me like a Brett Favre football,
but then he would just torture me.
That's not a good working environment.
No one wants to be in a place with that.
So you regretted leaving.
I like that.
You know what happens, for those of you not in the business,
is a writer will get hot, and they're on on a hot show and then their contract is up.
And it's like it's like a sports analogy, Donald.
Their contract is up and they can and they're in demand for other teams.
Yes.
I've noticed that some writers don't even finish the gig.
They'll get like halfway through.
don't even finish the gig.
They'll get like halfway through.
And if it looks like the show's either on,
on the bubble and they don't know what it's going to do,
they bounce really fast to the next gig.
they want to make that money,
Donald.
I understand that,
but there's no loyalty in this business.
By the way,
I want to,
I want to tell you,
I have two things I did this week that are,
that are so not me.
They're so Donald.
I, I, and they're so Donald.
And they were both wonderful.
I watched a sports documentary.
Which one?
Netflix has a series called Bad Sports.
You guys would love this.
Tim, you love the sports.
I love sports.
I love, yeah.
Well, Bad Sports is about- And I love your sports analogies.
Bad Sports is about controversies in sports,
and this one was about point shaving, the ASU point shaving scandal.
Do you remember that?
Yeah, sure, sure.
I never knew what point shaving was.
I'm fascinated by it.
It was a player that was actually doing it.
Two.
Yeah, but they were so good at it because they would have phenomenal games,
like score 30 points, 40.
Yes.
Did you watch it?
No, I remember when it happened. You've got to watch this
doc, dude. This guy
is so sad. It's tragic.
They were broke, and they were young,
and they did it, and they did
their time, and they suffered the
consequences. But when you watch the man cry
as he tells his story, because he was headed to the NBA.
Was it Charles Shackelford?
No, his nickname was
he had a funny
nickname.
Headache. His nickname was Headache.
That is funny. Anyway, he
was so fucking good
that the bookie
would say,
you can win,
but it's got to be
no more than six points.
Right.
And he would hit it.
The game would end with six points.
He was the point guard, which I learned Tim Holbert really is the sort of quarterback in basketball.
He's in control of the whole game.
I didn't know that.
I learned it from watching that.
Also in jazz music, there's a point guard.
So the guy that the people that everyone follow in the improvisation.
So is Michael Jordan the point guard?
No, he's a two guard.
Yeah.
But you might as well consider him a point guard because he had the ball in his hand most of the time.
Let me ask you, and I'm sorry, again, everyone listening knows that I know very little.
So your best player, your mega player, isn't always the point guard?
No.
Not always.
Most likely your best player isn't the point guard.
Zach, I watched The Rescue.
Yes, I recommended The Rescue.
And Donald, you need to watch this.
It's fascinating.
Shit, Tim.
And also, I learned something very interesting from a guy
who I play tennis with he said
you would assume in the rescue that all the
don't give away any spoilers Tim because our
audience doesn't want spoilers
for those of you who may have missed an episode the rescue is a
documentary on Disney
about the
young boys who were trapped in a cave
anyway it's amazing
the doc.
And now Ron Howard is making, well, has made, and the buzz around town is that it's amazing, the narrative version of it.
Anyway, people should watch that.
Now, Tim, I was just reminding the audience.
What were you about to say about it without giving spoilers?
Well, you can edit it out, but my friend told me – I assume that all the footage that they had of the going back and forth underwater, they must have rigged cameras up for safety or something, but that was all recreated.
It blew my mind.
Oh, I don't like that.
I know, but it blew my mind.
The second thing I did, Donald, is I said I'm going to try, I'm sick and tired of not,
of this global phenomenon of Marvel.
I'm,
I'm dating a Marvel superhero.
I said,
I'm going to give some of these movies a chance.
The last one,
I really,
I really don't watch them.
Of course I watched one.
I watched black widow and I watched,
I've seen an Avengers movie,
but I'm like,
I'm going to give the phase one a chance.
And, uh, I had seen Iron Man and I always loved Iron Man.
So I started with Iron Man 2 and I really enjoyed it.
Oh, shit.
And then I went on to Thor 1, which I didn't enjoy as much.
But I didn't.
Although, you know, I love me some Natalie Portman.
I just I thought the movie wasn't as good.
But then, per Donald's recommendation, I watched the first Captain America, which was great.
Fucking amazing movie.
It's well done.
Well done.
Wait till you see the second one.
It's better.
I'm done, babe.
It's done.
I'm sorry, guys.
I just got to get this IV out.
We could do it.
Let's talk about something.
So there's a nurse.
I just want the audience to know there's now a nurse
that's come in. Wait, Donald,
did you call the nurse baby?
No, my wife. Why did you call the nurse baby?
My wife. Babe!
You can't do that anymore.
That's not appropriate, Donald.
You can't look off to the nurse and say baby.
I called the nurse baby. Can you please make an entrance
real quick and say hi?
Please?
It appears I'm done.
Play the theme song.
Casey, come down here.
I don't know nothing about raising these fools.
So tell me what to do.
I don't know nothing about raising these kids.
And that's what it is.
Come on, guys.
It appeared that he called the nurse baby, Casey.
You know what?
He's trained.
That's all he knows what to say.
Tim Holbert here was, you know, have you guys met?
Hi.
No, I feel like I know you, though, because of the podcast.
Okay, well, Tim was just saying that we're not back in a year where you call nurses babe.
So remind your husband.
Yeah.
Yeah. We're working on that. He doesn't get nurses babe. So remind your husband. Yeah. Yeah.
We're working on that.
He doesn't get out much.
I don't let him go anywhere.
So, you know, he's not used to being around people.
Donald and I have a very big surprise that we can't talk about.
But maybe we can bleep out.
But I want Tim to hear it and the audience can hear Tim's reaction to it.
I can't wait.
And maybe Joelle and Danilk's reaction to it.
But we'll just have to bleep
out what it is, I think. Do I know?
Yeah, you know. It's the thing that
we're doing. Oh, the thing.
Are you guys making it official? Yes, the thing.
Hey, Donald, I thought we could
tell Joelle, Danilk,
and Tim our thing, and
they'll bleep it out, but the audience
can at least hear their reaction to it.
Our exciting thing.
Wait. Okay. I was gonna do it.
You said you wanted to do it. I was gonna do it.
But how come you get to steal doing the thing?
You do it. You know what? I was late. You do it.
Go ahead. Yeah, you were late. Timpani,
Daniel. Timpani.
Okay. Donald and I
uh...
Shut up.
What?
That's amazing.
Oh, my heart is so full for you guys.
That's amazing.
That is awesome.
I'm going to say something right now.
When it came across the wire, Zach hit me up at like 10 o'clock at night after dinner with Flo.
And he hits me up and he's had a couple.
And he's like, dude, it fucking happened.
I'm like, what happened?
He's like, ****.
And I'm like, dude, you're so fucking drunk.
You're so drunk.
How drunk are you right now that you fucking have to feel right now I was calling you from bed
and I had had a few
and I was so excited
and Don was like
oh cool cool cool whatever
and then when we hung up
Flo was like how come he wasn't more excited
and I was like I think he's doing the whole
I'll believe it when I see it vibe
it was 10 o'clock at night
dude who calls you at 10 o'clock at night, dude. Who calls you at 10 o'clock
at night with news like that? No one.
You did,
obviously. Fans, you will know
soon enough what
that is. It's very cool. It's a
very exciting thing for, I would
say, a bucket list item for Donald and I.
It is definitely a bucket list. Now, Donald, something
we are allowed to talk about is your
exciting DC news. That's on the interwebs allowed to talk about is your exciting D.C. news.
Can you?
That's on the internet.
I don't know how I got this lucky.
I think, you know what?
The whiteboard thing is real, dude.
I really believe it.
I told you the whiteboard thing is real.
I know you told me, but I didn't believe.
It's magical.
It is magical.
And, you know, I wrote a bunch of things on my whiteboard.
One of them was being in DC, in the DC universe,
and it has officially happened, dude.
It has officially happened.
Not only will I be in the DC universe.
Tell everyone and keep in mind that a lot of listeners
don't know the intricacies of the DC universe.
Go ahead.
Okay, so I'm going to be on a show called Legends of Tomorrow.
It airs on the DC universe. Go ahead. Okay, so I'm going to be on a show called Legends of Tomorrow. It airs on the CW.
Yeah, I'm used to calling it the WB from back in the day.
That's how old I am.
That's how old I am.
Remember the frog?
Remember the frog?
That was the WB frog.
Yeah, the WB frog.
Anyway, so it's on the CW.
It's in the Arrowverse, which is Berlanti.
We've had a couple of people from the Berlanti-verse on the show.
Tom Cavanaugh plays the reverse Flash.
And Berlanti keeps hiring us.
So thank you, Greg Berlanti, for continuing to hire me and Donald.
Thank you.
Yeah, thank you, Berlanti.
Thank you, Sarah Schechter also.
Yeah, she's cool.
Shout out.
She's amazing.
Anyway, so I will be –
You can't –
Nope, you got to beep that.
But I will be –
on Legends of Tomorrow.
Now, I learned just because they, of course, then wrote me things like, are you, is Zach going to be ****?
That's who I think he should play, too.
Is it just a voice?
No, it would be a character.
We'd dress up like **** superheroes, put on superhero outfits.
Well, you tell Berlani that I'll ****.
****, yeah.
It's on the podcast.
It's on the podcast. It's on the podcast!
It's on the podcast!
Drop it! You're gonna have to believe who he says
he's gonna be. Vancouver? Yeah, dude.
Vancouver's dope. No, I don't fuck with Vancouver.
What? Oh, shit! What?
No, I love Vancouver, but
is there still... Wait, sorry. Let me ask.
Let me start this over. Does Canada still
have a two-week...
No, no, no. You don't have to quarantine.
Oh, because we talked about this on the podcast, butada still have a two-week uh no no no you don't have to quarantine oh because he you know we talked about this on the podcast but they were having a two-week
sit in a hotel room no fucking around quarantine daddy don't do that don't daddy don't do that no
no no they've my friend my good friend did it for to do a show and she sat in a hotel room
for two weeks and I would go shining.
Yeah.
Think of the masturbation
that goes on in those hotel rooms.
Everyone's there for two weeks.
It could clog the city's sewer system.
I'm there for an hour
and I've already fucking shot five times.
Donald masturbates on the plane. No, no, no no you're not allowed to do that you're not allowed
to do that you're not allowed to say they never say in the rules you can't there's an old there's
an old uh there's an old stand-up joke this there's one of my favorite stand-up jokes from
way back when the guy goes um i uh found a penthouse magazine in the seat back cover of my airplane seat.
I have one word for you.
Acupado.
You know, my whole life, I always thought it was bizarre that in the magazine shop,
they put the black cover things over the porn.
Still.
Still.
Who's buying Penthouse and Hustlerler at the airport and what are you doing
with said magazine it's crazy does that do they still have i remember playboy used to be at the
airport but that was like no you know how in the magazine shop there'd be like four four magazines
that had black covers on them right which is obviously porn i must i don't know in 2022 but
i remember looking a few years ago and they
still had them and I was thinking like
who are these people
who is sitting
down holding magazines
but then it's not even like Playboy which is like
especially now is just like light
it's like Maxim it's like Hustler
and Panhandle
who's like licking their finger
and turning the page perusing Hustler and Penhounds. Yeah, with jokes. Who's like licking their finger and turning the page,
like perusing Hustler on a pun.
This is so great.
I can't believe I'm hanging out with you guys.
We love you, Tim Hober.
Good to see you, man.
Tim, as I recall, you had about seven children.
Did that increase?
I have four children.
I had four children in four years, yes.
Four children in four years?
Yes.
We're not messing
around yeah it's crazy now what is crazy that brings that's like the irish irish twins like
you guys yeah but yeah we had we had a daughter too right yeah i am wow dude we drink and refight
and then we had a so we had a daughter a son and then we had twins so, a son, and then we had twins. So it was crazy. Oh, okay.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Wow.
Now, also for fans, Jill, Tim's wife, played the patient that sang the Colin Hayes song.
On a Clear Day.
On a clear day, I can see the very long way.
That was a great episode.
Jill did a fantastic job.
Her acting in that was phenomenal.
Yeah, you had some good scenes with her in that.
She was so good, and her voice is ridiculous.
Yeah, that was one of my favorite weeks because all of our friends were on the show.
Yeah.
I mean, everyone in that – I think everyone in that show was a friend of a writer or an actor.
It was crazy.
Yeah, amazing.
Which is also what's so great about Bill.
Does that happen a lot?
Well, does that happen a lot?
No, that's bill all the way right
because you would think that would happen like you know zach just directed zach's directed
several movies now i've only been in one of them that's so sad well the one you were in didn't do
well so i'm automatically there it is well i just thought you might have been my curse so there it
is no more so it's method there's method i gotta put method man in everyone
now it's either method man or freaking got it got it method man listen i have very good luck
when my african-american star is a method man or morgan freeman so i'm sticking with them
i put you in one movie and no one goes to see now i'll tell you guys the one thing that i can bring
to this podcast that's unique is that I have all the dirt on Bill.
You know, I mean, Bill is my first friend in L.A.
Let's go.
And then I worked with him on Spin City, you know, until he left Spin City.
And then right when Spin City ended.
Did you work on him with – sorry.
Oh, that was the first show you worked with him on.
Yeah.
Did you work on him with, sorry, oh, that was the first show you worked with him on?
Yeah, so Bill hired me on Spin City, and I just got to L.A., and he was my first friend, and then he did everything for me. I mean, he saw me do stand-up.
He got me a job doing warm-up for a show he was on.
Then he introduced me to my wife.
Then he hired me on Spin City.
Did this come from basketball?
Were you guys playing basketball together?
Yeah.
I met,
I met him at the Hollywood Y with,
uh,
you guys were talking about Hollywood shuffle.
Robert Townsend used to play.
Right.
Oh,
really?
Yeah.
And,
and,
and Rondell Sheridan.
Do you remember him?
Yeah.
Rondell.
Yeah.
So,
so Rondell Sheridan had a,
a sitcom when everyone had a sitcom called minor adjustments.
And,
uh,
was he a chiropractor?
And when he,
we would play against him at the Y I'd go, Oh, Rondell Sheridan makes some minor adjustments and uh was he a chiropractor and when he we would play against
him at the Y I'd go oh Rondell Sheridan makes some minor adjustments and he hated it
but he was yeah I met Bill at the and then I worked on Spin City with him which was insane
and then I came to the first uh right with Spin City and he brought me on Scrubs and all the
writers on Scrubs were like how can this guy talk to Bill this way?
Because everyone was afraid of him.
And I would just call him on all his shit,
and it was hilarious.
Well, you guys, it was clear that you and he
had known each other for a really, really long time.
Well, it was also clear, you know,
Bill has also clear that Bill had a lot of respect for Tim. I mean, Bill would give Tim so much more responsibility than Tim.
Out the gate, too, though, if I'm correct.
You came in.
But I mean, there were certain – Bill had his – it goes without saying, any leader knows who he can delegate to and delegate leadership to. And Tim, you know, you and Matt Tarsus are two examples that come to mind of writers
in the room that he would say, OK, I got to go do X, Y, Z.
You run the room.
You're in charge.
So you did.
How about you?
You were kind of like a vice president at times.
Well, he called me and he was like, you know, come on the second season of Scrubs.
And so I really did a ton of homework on that show.
Like I watched like every episode of the first season wrote down everything.
And I was like blown away how good the show was.
And so when I came in,
you know,
all like a lot of writers are just like,
Oh,
you're on hiatus after a long year.
They don't want to watch the show.
So when I came in,
I just watched like all 24 of them and like studied them.
And so I was just like,
I couldn't wait to start working
on that show it was so good that's the thing prepared you came in prepared i mean and it was
just such a good show and uh the guy who writes the essays and you guys have on as a guest what's
his name oh scrubs wiki trevor yeah oh no no no you're talking about oh shea shea serrano like i
loved when he said that he liked seasons two and five
because those are like my favorite seasons.
I think five is my favorite.
Listen, this is what we are doing.
We're going to five, six, seven, eight soon
into season six, episode one, everybody.
Yes, crazy.
But I have to say thus far, five is by far my favorite.
I loved, I thought there's so many laughs in one through four but i like it
one step trippier and and season five definitely delivered so trippy and it's fun listening to you
guys deconstruct that shit and just be like what the fuck happened i love it and bill's come on
and said he bill has come on and sorry no i just wanted to finish that and said bill has come on
and said you know it was season five he's getting little bored. You had to shake it up and shake it up.
I mean, there's ostriches wearing tangos.
Oh, my God.
And you guys were just like gelling.
Well, this episode, I'm going to say, I mean, I don't know what happened in between, but I mean, I feel like this episode is chock full of stoner humor throughout. Also, I feel for coming back into it,
we seem like all very,
very, very game and very,
very confident in this episode.
100%. 100%.
I was really blown
away by usually
performances get bigger and stuff.
You guys were right in the pocket on this one.
Thank you.
Would you like to do the honors and count us in, tim hobert oh my god for real yeah okay let me let
me let me get my special guest to do it with us all right ready peppa oh wow cute dog we're gonna
do it together ready yes yeah can i can i kind of do a don impression? Yes, sure. Go for it. Five, six, seven, eight! Stories about a show we made
About a bunch of docs and nurses
And a janitor who loved to hate
I said here's the stories
That we all should know
So gather round to hear our
Gather round to hear our
Scrubs Rewatch Show with Zach and Donald.
Mm-hmm.
That was good.
I got to run to the restaurant.
I'll be right back.
Do it.
That was flawless.
While Donald's peeing, I think we can still talk, Tim, about another thing I like about you is that you are capable of beating the very, very cocky Bill Lawrence in sports.
Yes, we have.
You guys are both very good tennis players.
And Bill, I mean, I've seen Bill beat like pros.
Yeah, Bill is the most competitive man I've ever met.
I used to say that Bill would come in first and third in a jack-off contest.
That's how competitive he is.
Because you're saying during the second, he would reboot.
Yes.
Oh, wow.
That's a good joke.
And then come in third as well.
It's a thinker.
It's a thinker, that joke.
Now you guys have been playing pickleball,
but you're on the same team when you play pickleball, right?
No, no, no.
It's me and JD, the real JD, versus Matt, Tarsus, and Bill.
Oh, my God.
It's the most scrubs pickleball game ever.
It's the funniest thing ever.
Donald, Tim Hobert plays pickleball, him and real JD,
versus Matt, Tarsarsus and Bill.
It's hilarious.
It's two very unathletic players.
No, they're all great, right?
Well, Matt's really athletic.
Matt's a great tennis player.
JD you wouldn't think is athletic.
I'm just going by basketball.
I'm just going by basketball.
Yeah, Matt's not a great basketball player.
You just look at Matt Tarsus and think he was probably good at tennis.
Yeah, he is.
He was a squash player, too, in college.
There you go.
I'm shocking.
Anything with short shorts.
Anything with short shorts.
No, he just looks like you remember in training places when they're like,
and he steps on the ball.
Matt Tarsus.
Matt Tarsus.
Matt Tarsus.
Matt Tarsus, when he plays basketball,
sometimes we'll be in the fifth game of the night
and Bill Callahan will say,
Matt, when did you get here?
Oh, that's horrible.
So we, that's fucked up.
But Tim, you're equally as entranced by pickleball
as Bill, right?
Yeah, Bill gets like, whenever he,
whenever there's something new,
Bill loves to promote it and watch all the,
yeah, he's obsessed.
Yeah, the new thing is the suit.
Do you know about the suit?
What's the suit?
Oh, Tim, we were talking about this at dinner.
Donald, do you know about this?
You can't get them now.
There's this electrode suit that all the cool kids are getting now.
I think it's like $3,000.
And it comes with a workout that you do for 20 minutes with an iPad workout and it gets you repped like fast. Where can I find said suit? Daniel, can you Google that for me? I think
it's called The Suit. I have a confession. I don't know why I'm giving them a free ad,
but I want one. Do you guys have Hypervolts?
You know, like the Theragun?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Yeah, Theragun.
We love Theragun.
Well, okay, because I'm friends with the lady that does Hypervolts.
I'll get you guys Hypervolts. You probably don't need them.
Joelle, isn't Theragun one of our advertisers?
Or they were?
Yeah.
They were at one point.
We only use Theragun.
Okay.
One thing, quick, Zach.
Can I say before we get off the bill of sports thing,
Bill and I started playing a lot of tennis in the pandemic.
We played 70 sets of tennis and the score,
the score is 35 all.
No.
Wow.
Oh,
no kidding.
I think it's safe to say that you're well matched,
but then I just want to put this on the air that I've beat him soundly.
The last four times we've played and he's very upset.
No. Okay. Less the last six times we've played. He hasn't this on the air that i've beat him soundly the last four times we've played and he's very upset no okay less the last six times we've played he hasn't been on the show uh that much this year he's such a busy man so i've got a few like little scrubs nuggets that i wrote down
that i just can't wait to tell you guys about give us a nugget in my 20 plus years of writing comedy zach my favorite ad lib was when when donald and judy
were in that bathtub and you were taking a shit that's my improv and you said sorry about the
tuesday guys that's to this day that's my favorite thing and that's and i've worked with neil flynn
now you know eight more years on the middle that's the funniest thing i've ever heard um uh then here's a good one um uh
one time matt tarsus i was being tortured by bill it was like seven in the morning
and we kept bringing him this one scene in editing and bill would just keep telling us
it wasn't good enough and uh like the third time we brought in the editing bay he's like guys it's
just not good enough and we walked out the door shut and then they hit play on the edit.
And the joke was Dr.
Kelso's face had been burning with coffee and,
and you go, whatever you do, don't say splotchy.
And then you go good splotchy, Dr.
Splotchy.
And we're outside the door having been told our scene isn't good enough for like the fifth time.
And that's the fucking joke we hear come through the door.
We're like, where's the bar?
We got to get into this.
We got to get into this episode.
It was written by Tim Hobart.
The beginning.
Hey, happy season.
Happy season six, everybody.
Again, not to be neurotic, but Donald and I have no plan for when we run out of episodes.
Maybe we should just watch things that we've been in next and go through that.
That just seems weird, though.
I don't know.
I don't know.
I don't know.
You guys should do a Broadway-themed podcast.
No, the listeners will all go away.
We have so many listeners worldwide um you have
to and we don't want any of them to leave so you want to bring you either have to do something that
that that would dovetail with their the love of scrubs right or you have to pivot to interviewing
interesting people um which everybody seems to be doing now which everyone is doing and it's
sort of played out
And then it's like
How am I going to compete with Mark Maron
I'm going to noodle on this one for you guys
I'm going to come up with something
Oh Catalyst
Okay guys sorry
I'm just going to circle back
Google Catalyst suit
Tim weren't you with me
When we were talking about this
Oh you guys hang out
Oh word y'all hang. Oh, you guys hang out? Oh, word?
Y'all hang out?
Y'all hang out, huh?
Oh, y'all hang out?
The reason I found out Tim was a fan of the podcast was he—
Bill brought me to dinner.
Bill brought him to dinner.
Oh, yeah, so y'all hang out.
All right, so you guys, this Catalyst suit, and I don't—
This is apparently people are saying,
and if Catalyst wants to send me and Donald a suit, we would be very happy to advertise the fuck out of it because they're expensive.
But apparently this thing actually works.
You work out in it for 20 minutes and you get ripped.
It's like the Iron Man suit.
It looks like the Flash suit from the movie.
Bill told me he was going to leave me that suit when he goes to Miami.
Oh, really?
Yeah. But not after I probably said I beat him in tennis so i think bill and krista got one but there there's a way
there's a wait list yeah come on catalyst hook us up catalyst suit catalyst up catalyst come on
catalyst catalyst someone here who knows uh the ceo ofalyst, please send us all the suit. All right.
Okay, so here we are.
It's a wacky episode, okay?
I've got new long hair.
This episode has one of my favorite jokes in the whole show.
She liked it.
The whole season.
And we'll get to that, but I don't remember.
I think I improvised some of it.
I don't want to insult your writing, Tim.
How much of that? Who knows who wrote what in this thing? I know, but do you recall? I don't want. I think I improvised some of it. I don't want to insult your writing, Tim. How much of that?
Who knows who wrote what in this thing?
I know, but do you recall?
I don't want to take credit.
Let's just say it was a team effort.
Yeah, okay.
But the bit that we'll get to of me describing to my friends that I impregnated Elizabeth Banks without penetration.
Okay, I have a question to ask.
Yes.
We literally went to Vegas just to do a cold open.
Yeah, how did that happen?
How did that happen?
Tell us about the Blue Man Group.
Bill loves the big season opening episodes,
and he always wants to do big stuff in those.
Right.
Where did the Blue Man Group come from?
I understood it as, like, Bill wants to go to Vegas
with the whole cast and crew.
That's how I looked at it too.
Can we find a reason to make that happen?
But also Bill was obsessed with Blue Man Group.
He loved Blue Man Group.
Oh, he did?
Yeah.
Now, did Blue Man Group, we must have worked out a deal.
I don't know if we paid them or they paid us because it was sort of an ad for them.
I think it probably helped them more than it helped us.
Well, we went to the club with
the blue man group dude afterwards too we did that night we did we partied with the blue man
group that night not only did we party with the blue man group i remember uh the people that were
in the club that night were kim kardashian uh we went to town that night kim kardashian and but
she wasn't famous kim kardashian yet she wasn't famous kim kardashian yet i remember them being
like and kim kardashian in the house! And I'd be like,
and I was like, who is that? And someone
said it's Paris Hilton's sidekick.
It's Paris Hilton's closet
organizer or some shit
like that. That's what it was back in the day. I remember
somebody introducing Kim
to me. Hey, Donald, have you ever met Kim before?
And I was like, oh, hey, how's it going?
Right, but I didn't know she hadn't become
the most famous person in the world yet. She was like, oh, hey, how's it going? Right, but I didn't know she hadn't become the most famous person in the world yet.
She was like Paris Hilton's sidekick.
Yeah, sidekick at the time.
And now, forget about it.
All right.
So Jordan's pregnant.
Jordan's pregnant.
Jack's talking a lot.
Right.
Now, Jordan's pregnant.
Tim, you would know.
Who is she pregnant with in real life?
That would probably have been Will, I imagine.
Okay. Okay.
Yeah.
And Cox gets mad and throws food at Jack's face.
Yes.
You guys have lots of children.
It must be frustrating sometimes when they throw food.
Do you want to throw food back at them ever?
Yeah.
You do, but you don't.
There was one line in this thing right before they threw the TV out the window.
I was jumping ahead a little bit, but like when I got back from,
we had all four kids on vacation and we got in our minivan.
My brother Mike picked us up and I was just so devastatingly tired.
And Mike, one of the kids dropped his pacifier one of the twins
and i was trying to pick it up and my back hurt and my my my sternum was in the uh the the stroller
wheel and i'm trying to get this pacifier and i arch up because my back hurts and i go in front
of the the tv and the minivan this is finding nemo and my little guy charlie goes i can't see
nemo and I go
how would you like my fucking fist in your face
that's what I said to my kid
and so I remembered when I was watching
this the
guy goes I can't see the TV and then Dr. Cox
threw it out of the window and I'm like
oh my god that was like PTSD of having
that's where it came from oh my god anyways
I'm probably going to get like social services calling me.
But no, it's okay.
Tim doesn't harm his children.
He just sometimes threatens to.
Yeah, to put your fist in her.
Let's take a break.
We'll be right back after these fine words.
When you find that bright spot to help you get through your day, it's powerful.
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Hi, I'm Martha Stewart, and we're back with a new season of my podcast.
Hi, I'm Martha Stewart, and we're back with a new season of my podcast.
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So there's a great moment in this where we're talking about ringtones.
And Turk's talking about how he's going to put instincts by,
by,
by into his phone for the ringtone.
And Elliot says,
I'm putting,
uh,
Jesus take the wheel,
uh,
by Carrie Underwood into mine.
Right.
And Rob Mascio's character,
the Todd walks by and says,
I'm carrying Underwood now.
That was the
second greatest thing he had, other
than in your endo.
In your endo.
Todd starts off
the episode saying that he has
Underwood, which is a
good joke. Now, Pop Rocks and Coke,
if you don't know, if you're too young
to know, it was always an old wives' tale
when we were growing up. This is a deep cut, but there used to be an ad for Life Cereal.
Life Cereal was a very popular cereal.
I don't know if it's still popular or not, but I loved it as a kid.
And in the ads, the commercials had a little boy and he was named Mikey.
Yes.
And he was adorable, cute commercial kid. And they'd be like, give it to Mikey. He loves it, right? No, give it named Mikey. Yes. And he was adorable, cute, commercial kid.
And they'd be like, give it to Mikey.
He loves it, right?
No, give it to Mikey.
He'll eat anything.
He'll eat anything.
And then Mikey would eat Life cereal.
And it was adorable.
And they would say, Mikey likes it.
He likes it.
He likes it.
Hey, Mikey, he likes it.
OK, go look this up on YouTube if you're curious.
Hey, Mikey, he likes it.
Okay, go look this up on YouTube if you're curious.
Well, a rampant rumor spread that Mikey, the adorable kid from the Life commercials, had died.
Yes.
Had exploded.
Had exploded.
He exploded because he ate Pop Rocks and Coke together.
Yes.
Like Pop Rocks.
If you don't know what Pop Rocks are, it's a candy that goes in your mouth And it fizzes, we show it in this episode
And apparently
So as children
We were terrified
That we would explode like poor Mikey
If we ever had Pop Rocks and Coke together
But there's something to all of that
Because have you ever seen Mentos and Coke
When they are mixed
And you see what they can do
So imagine if you had Mentos and Coke when they are mixed and you see what they can do? Right.
So imagine if you had Mentos in your mouth and that happened. So the fact that you could see
it happen with Mentos only makes the urban legend even more of a possibility because
it happens with Mentos. Mentos explodes if you put it in a bottle.
I must admit, I don't know if Mikey died from Pop Rocks.
Mikey, if you're still alive.
Mikey, are you alive?
Can you please Google what happened to Mikey from the Life Zero commercial?
And is it in fact false that it was Pop Rocks?
That's got to be an urban myth.
That's got to be an urban myth.
I haven't thought about that in years.
No, but do you remember that?
I remember being a child
being afraid that somehow I would
forget and have Pop Rocks and Coke
and explode like Mikey.
Accidentally.
So Kim tells me she's pregnant
and I go, I have to ask you,
have there been other penises?
Great line.
Was that ad-libbed?
I don't remember writing that, but that's a great line.
Since we have the writer on the show, I'm going to take –
You should take that one.
I'm going to say anything particularly funny.
And I also loved your delivery on, well, thanks a lot.
That's hilarious.
Yeah.
That's hilarious.
That's different.
That's hilarious.
That's hilarious.
I remember loving that joke in the room. So the Backstreet Boys – sorry, NSYNC dancing, that's hilarious. That's different. That's hilarious. That's hilarious. I remember loving that joke in the room.
So the Backstreet Boys, sorry, NSYNC dancing, that was very funny.
I'm trying to get Turk, call Turk, call Turk, call Turk,
and I can't get him because the entire lobby of the hospital is dancing.
And Rob, of course, has his shirt off.
Did we ask you, do you remember, Donald,
if we asked you what song we should use for that
no you guys came in and were like
we're going to use Bye Bye Bye and I was like that's fine
that's perfect it works
I do remember
I do remember this
and I thought it was
really weird but I remembered it
and then it happened in the show
but when you're in front of the deck still,
and I knew that something like this had happened.
I just couldn't remember it.
And you say something to the effect of, you know, I should.
And my bad.
There's a party on the deck.
Yes.
The gay seniors, you got to set up right.
The gay seniors are having a party on my deck, and I'm hammered.
Right.
And you say, and JD says something to the likings of,
I should be with one of you guys.
I should marry one of you guys.
It would be a lot easier.
My life would be easier if I married one of you guys.
And then he passes out.
And they freaking form a freaking,
like a funeral.
Is that a procession when they're in line like that?
It's a procession.
Let's roll, boys.
It's a procession of Volkswagen bugs.
All the way to Vegas.
I remember shooting that, and I remember you just being obsessed with that Les Mis stuff.
Les Mis is in town.
It was all you.
Yeah.
I assumed I could get them off.
I kept J.D.
It's the second time trying to get the gay seniors off his deck using Les Mis as a lure.
Les Mis is in town.
And they didn't fall for it.
Instead, they pretty much take advantage of my incapacitation
and try and gay marry me.
You heard him, girls.
Let's roll.
But I think that's consent.
What you said is consent.
I don't think it's consent.
You said it.
My life would be easier if I would just marry one of you guys.
You heard him, girls.
Yeah, well, all I know is I wake up and I'm about to be married in Vegas to a man.
Oh, my God.
That's funny.
And then Donald gets to Vegas way too fast.
Yes.
It's four hours.
What is it?
Four and a half hours if you're driving fast?
Yeah.
But where did we say the show was at?
Well, we always – that's true.
It was never specific.
In five seasons, we've sort of deduced that it's Los Angeles.
Los Angeles, yeah.
You know why, Tim?
We had a fake name in the writer's room of the place.
I can't remember it, though.
The real kicker was Sarah takes a train to AC World.
I know, I know.
By the way, just hearing you say kicker, I can't wait to get to AC world. I know. I know. By the way, I can't just see you here and you say kicker.
I can't wait to get to my favorite scene.
Okay.
Oh my God.
Let's keep moving.
So you're all dancing.
Uh,
Kelso gets into it for some reason.
He spikes the lens when he says this is.
Yeah,
he did.
I noticed that.
I didn't know what that was about.
It was sort of a weird choice.
John Inwood.
John Inwood,
our cinematographer directed this.
So,
um,
I don't know why our wonderful DP made it such an odd choice.
But for no reason, Kelso spikes the lens when he says that line.
Yeah.
Inwood's a good guy.
So we're in Vegas.
Sorry.
We're in Vegas.
And we do the whole Blue Man Group thing.
I remember it being a lot of fun because all we had to do
was shoot that quick
walk and talk with Donald and the Blue Man
Group thing, which we
didn't take long. We did it all in a day.
We literally did it in the...
Maybe a half a day. It was easy.
Because then we had the rest of the night.
And then we partied. The whole crew
and cast was there.
I remember having an amazing time and we
took over we took over blackjack tables together and we played poker you guys were living the life
of riley we were you know what was crazy huge hands because i remember i remember watching
bill bet huge hands because he was much richer than we were. And I was
way more inebriated than we were.
And it was a lot of fun to watch him bet
really stupidly giant hands of blackjack.
I'd never seen someone do that before.
I do remember you guys being hung over
the rest of the week.
Whenever we were shooting.
Oh man, there are so many hungover stories
from...
I wonder how that works.
We were shooting two episodes. So at some point Oh, man, there are so many hungover stories from, I mean. I wonder how that works. Like, we didn't, like.
We were shooting two episodes.
This is, so at some point, we were shooting two episodes at a time, weren't we?
Weren't we doing something where we were doing, at some point, it seemed like we were shooting,
we weren't shooting, like, this season alone.
I don't think we shot in order.
Like, I think there was that.
Randall got inventive right
probably right i think there was some times where we were doing other shows that were gonna be
before and then i don't know i don't know but the show is always there was the show was always shot
on a monday through friday schedule i don't know how we would have gone to vegas partied huge and
like been back in la they had to.A. They had to be shooting
something at the hospital. There had to be two units.
Okay, so
is this the first? It's Beard Fosse,
damn it? Second.
Second, okay. So Beard Fosse
has a catchphrase.
Yeah, and
Elliot was going to mount him. I don't know why
he didn't take her up on that.
Why was Beard Fosse so against being mounted by elliot because he was upset about the name i guess she could call him anything i mean what was he thinking yeah well he may not be into
women um he certainly didn't take the lure of being mounted by elliot who's very attractive
i mean i don't know i don't know what happened there.
Yeah.
This made me laugh.
Coincidentally, I have a cousin named Shadazy.
That was hilarious.
That was so funny.
Now, Tim, where did this convention come from,
if you recall even,
of having the three of us
confront mere sort of different images of ourselves.
I think it was like just one of those.
Again, it was like the first one of the season,
Bill always wanted to do really cool stuff.
And I think having you guys play different versions of yourself
felt really cool at the time.
Well, Mrs. ZB is not a name.
By the way, you're a handsome, handsome woman.
I did an after-school special way, you're a handsome, handsome woman.
I did an after-school special called My Summer as a Girl,
which I encourage you all to Google image. You talked about it with Gabby as well.
Yes.
So I did an after-school special when I was at Northwestern
during a summer break called My Summer as a Girl.
It's a masterpiece.
Let me ask you a question.
Please look for clips on YouTube and enjoy.
When you were at Northwestern
and you were filming the movie,
were you like big man on campus?
Like, I fucking got a job.
Some of y'all don't even have jobs yet.
Well, it was during a summer break and I remember
I came back. Well, when I went to
Northwestern, I had just done a small part in Manhattan Murder Mystery,
and that I was very proud of because that was a huge deal,
and I remember feeling cool kid about that.
Right.
This after-school special was pretty darn cheesy, and I knew it.
And I think I was a little embarrassed.
It wasn't like I was coming back like, oh, I was in something dope,
but the check was very meaningful to me as a college kid.
And I remember being thrilled about that.
But I remember feeling like I was in a fraternity.
I remember everyone gathering around to watch it.
This is awesome.
Dr. Cox would have loved to have known that you shot a student film called My Sire as a Girl.
Yeah.
And the afternoon special just pretty much stole the plot of Tootsie.
I couldn't get a job, and I needed a job, and I dressed up like a woman.
Well, good ones borrow.
But anyway, and now when I looked, I've been told I looked like the actress Heather Monterazzo,
which makes sense because we once played brother and we once played brother and
heather is way prettier than i looked but but but we once played brother and sister together so it
so it made sense this one i don't know i don't think i look like i'm gonna say but no disrespect
to the actress who then we morphed into you but i think you were prettier than the actress are you
saying that that's not nice oh well i'm sorry it's just uh the actress. Are you saying that? That's not nice, Tim.
Well, I'm sorry.
It's just a...
Well, you're saying that if you had to choose,
if you were at a bar and you were going to take one of us home,
you would have selected Mrs. ZB.
Yes, 100%.
I would have gone home with you that night.
For those of you as high as Donald,
you might not know...
You might not know that Mrs. ZB has my initials.
Wait, what?
Yes.
Oh, shit.
Yeah.
I just caught that.
No, come on, guys.
Come on, Jesus.
When you find that bright spot to help you get through your day, it's powerful.
That's where The Bright Side comes in.
A new daily podcast from Hello Sunshine that's bringing you a daily dose of joy.
I'm Danielle Robay.
And I'm Simone Boyce.
Listen, both Danielle and I are reporters.
We've covered the news and we know the world can feel heavy.
But the Bright Side podcast is a space to have a little fun, to learn something new and get into some friendly debates.
That's right. Join us five days a week
to see how life can look from the bright side. We'll hear from celebrities, authors, experts,
and listeners like you. Whether it's relationships, friend advice, or figuring out how to navigate
life's transitions, we'll talk through it all together. Listen to The Bright Side from Hello
Sunshine every weekday on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
All that sitting and swiping, our backs hurt, our eyeballs sting.
That's our bodies adapting to our technology.
But we can do something about it.
We saw amazing effects.
I really felt like the cloud in my brain kind of dissipated.
There's no turning back for me. Make 2024 the year you put your health before your inbox and take the Body Electric Challenge.
Listen to Body Electric from NPR on the iHeartRadio app or wherever you get your podcasts.
Hi, I'm Martha Stewart, and we're back with a new season of my podcast.
And we're back with a new season of my podcast.
This season will be even more revealing and more personal with more entrepreneurs, more trailblazers, more live events, more Martha, and more questions from you. I'm talking to my cosmetic dermatologist, Dr. Dan Belkin, about the secrets behind my skincare.
Walter Isaacson, about the geniuses who change the world.
Encore Jane, about creating a billion-dollar startup.
Dr. Elisa Pressman, about the five basic strategies
to help parents raise good humans.
Florence Fabrikant, about the authenticity
in the world of food writing.
Be sure to tune in to season two
of the Martha Stewart podcast.
Listen and subscribe to the Martha Stewart podcast
on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts,
or wherever you get your podcasts.
iHeart Podcast update this week
on your free iHeartRadio app.
In retrospect, revisit pop culture moments
from the 80s and 90s and try to
understand what it taught us about the world and a woman's place in it. Crying in Public. Two
20-something college women living in NYC dive into growing up at a time when there was no
distinction between what's public and what's private. Best of Both Worlds, a discussion on
work-life balance, career development, parenting, time management, productivity, and making time for
fun. Hear these podcasts and more on your free iHeartRadio app or wherever you get your podcasts.
Scrubs Rewatch Show with Zach and Donald.
I have another question now.
Go ahead.
And I'm from the African-American community.
Really?
Really.
But what the fuck is a funky cold medina?
Oh, there was a song Funky cold medina
I know and Tone Loke wrote the song
I know the song
But what is a funky cold medina
No no no
What's the premise of the song
It was aphrodisiac
Joelle you're the pop culture expert
Joelle I don't know
I said funky cold medina
Joelle was like I don't know what that shit is
Joel, you never heard of Funky Comedina?
I know the song, but
what does it mean?
I believe, as I recall, there was a video
and I think Funky Comedina was an
aphrodisiac drink that would make
the ladies all want
who sang that song?
Tone Loco
Funky Comedina is a date rape drug?
No, it was consensual.
No, it was consensual.
It was, I believe it was, it just...
Okay, here we go.
The women, I believe, knew they were drinking an aphrodisiac drink.
Am I totally off base here?
So, no, no, no.
The Urban Dictionary is agreeing with you.
Generally anything to help you get loose or let loose.
And Medina was a common surname for black families in Spanish.
So I don't think it's like it's just it helps you get loose.
Have fun.
Joelle, can you scroll through the video on YouTube and see if I'm correct in that women would drink it and then want to bang Tone Loke?
It comes full circle to me going home with you
if you were a woman in a bar, though.
If I had some funky cold medina and I saw you,
then it's a layup for you.
It wasn't like a roofie thing.
It was like you drink it and all of a sudden you're like,
give me that.
Oh, we found a recipe.
It's one ounce of absolute vodka Vodka, Southern Comfort,
and
Curacao?
I don't know how you say it.
Thank you. Over ice
with cranberry juice.
Please just answer my query
about whether in the video
the storyline...
I don't have the best memory, and I just want to know if I'm correct that in the storyline i just want i don't have the best memory and i just want to know if if i'm
correct that in the storyline of the video was that women changed their attitude towards tone
low once they'd had funky colmadina i think that's uh you could connect those dots right
i don't know i don't know all right donald your uh joke exactly man if i say this no i don't know. I don't know. All right. Donald, your joke. Jack, do you mind if I say this?
No, go ahead.
I don't know if you're driving this thing, but...
I do tend to drive the thing, Tim, but you're much like Bill, entrusting the writer's room to you.
Well, I did.
I loved when you were with the motorcycle accident guy, and you said, he said, what's up?
He said, what's up?
That made me laugh so hard.
We were off the rails this season man like there's so many
things that happen in this season where I'm like
not just this episode alone
like we came off of
five and I was like this is kind of crazy but
dude you hide in between my legs
where the pedal
and the freaking brakes should be
love it
this is on the verge of the backpack thing, how I fit there.
But I did fit there, I guess.
But why doesn't she see me?
Because you're hiding under the freaking, you're where the pedal and the brake are.
I know.
The reason people loved you guys together so much is like encapsulated in that charades thing.
Right.
I really got that.
That was funny.
I mean, that was so great.
That was funny.
The baby CPR class.
We are so going to kill the charades tournament this weekend.
I mean, people just love you guys.
Where did they join?
When did they get in a charade?
First of all, how did they get into the charades tournament?
Second, his wife is pregnant.
Where the fuck does he think he's going this weekend?
Get out of here.
We've been practicing for charades tournament.
I feel like we've given up on the Mighty Kites Club.
That hasn't gotten attention in years.
We haven't started the Mighty Kites Club yet, have we?
That's coming up.
No, I think Mighty Kites was while I was still there.
That was definitely while I was still there.
Because I wasn't here for season six.
There's a lot of hardcore fans.
What about Shower Shorts?
Shower Shorts, yeah.
Oh my God, I love Shower Shorts so much.
For the man who has nothing to hide, but still wants to.
One of my favorite things ever.
Yeah, me too.
But still wants to.
Wait, Tim, but you wrote the first episode for season six.
But then I left.
I didn't stay for season six.
Got it.
Okay, let me get this straight, Tim,
because I want to get into one of my favorite jokes
in all of this whole run of Scrubs,
which is J.D. explaining how he got Kim pregnant.
Oh, my God.
It seems to me that J that jd ejaculated to his own
dirty talk is that what happened it's amazing yes you got sucked up in your own dirty right so
what really happened was that they did they weren't just we'll go into what he says but he what seems to have happened in the macro is that jd started using
dirty talks and turned himself on so much with his own dirty talk right that he prematurely
ejaculated near near airborne near yes vulva yes and some seeped in and some seeped in i mean i
just want you like as a fan i just want
you to just read that monologue it was just so i wrote down some oh my god i wrote down some key
points there was some unexpected it's very tricky to describe um ejaculating prematurely on a woman's
vagina on on nbc in 2000 whatever it was in a disney show in a disney it starts with you getting
turned down by your own dirty talk yeah thanks thanks disney um all right so i say that there
was some i say can i confide in you guys and they're like sure yeah and say, we never, we got naked.
We neutered up and there was some unexpected friendly fire.
Wait a second.
You're telling me that you.
Yeah.
And I go, and I never, I never got a chance to enter the village.
Wait, wait, hold on.
You're saying that you didn't.
And there was an airstrike
on an outlying region.
Oh my god, you should have won an Emmy
for this speech.
And what's funny to me is that
how it starts off too, it's like, and I confide in you
guys. Yeah, and Turk trying
not to laugh is the funniest damn thing.
Can I just tell you guys something real quick because i don't i mean it's it's great to have
friends that you can be like that i'm sure we all like tim i'm sure you have stories like this
oh yeah yeah yeah where it's like my wife doesn't have those twins came about well i'm just saying
my wife doesn't have to do much anymore like when we're out and about she'll i'm sure bill told me a story
similar to this once too but my wife will talk the dirtiest to me in the car ride home like it's
going down oh shit we gonna do oh and then we gonna do this and i'm like oh yeah i can't wait
to get home and i'm all excited and everything and we get home and within seconds like that all
because of the dirty talk in the car.
The dirty talk.
Do you think that's by design?
That Casey's like, I don't want this shit to go on
forever, so I'm going to get you all worked up.
Absolutely, yes.
It's like the joystick.
She goes, she'll go
into, oh, you want to do that? I'm going to let
you do this and then we're going to do that.
And then, oh, I'm going to do this.
But JD did that to himself.
Yeah.
It doesn't even sound like Kim was participating in the Dirty Talk.
No, no, no.
He was doing it all along.
Well, Turk goes, Turk does say, oh, she like the Dirty Talk.
Yeah.
No, and I believe I say, no, I do.
I find it.
Yeah.
You say something like, I find it.
What do you say i see something like i think the ladies ladies like it and then and then i forgot what i said
yeah but you but you basically bring it around to like it's your dirty talk that turns you on
yes and then i'd love to see what that dirty the way you said penetration was so funny too
as kind of the woody allen kind of i have to tell you sorry i forgot to tell you i i i went to the I'd love to see what that dirty talk was. The way you said penetration was so funny too.
As kind of the Woody Allen kind of. I have to tell you, sorry, I forgot to tell you.
I went to the orthopedist because I'm having some back issues.
And they have a TV.
They're always playing random nature shows or whatever.
They play random TV in the waiting room.
And I walk in and psych
is playing huge with subtitles you know because it's off the volume's off on the tv and i got a
mask i mean i know they know my name from the from the monitors their computers and everything i got
an appointment but i i don't it doesn't it doesn't really cross my mind that they recognize me because
i've got a mask on and everything and they and they go uh one of them
goes does that bother you we're playing psych the fuck it's like curbing enthusiasm and i'm like
and i'm like well i will say of all the infinite television shows you guys could be playing
you happen to be playing the one that that does seem to come closest to to ours yeah
and you this is a doctor's office why not just put on ours
so sorry i know that was a non-sequitur but i have a i have a question to okay so there's two things
that happen in this season that i thought were, that happens from here on out.
But I think this is the year that Ken all of a sudden starts to get the monologues with the zinger at the end.
And then he walks out.
You know what I mean?
Ken does?
Yeah.
Ken gets the, this is when, I feel like this is when it started where, because he has the whole thing in this scene where he gives a story.
But at the end of the story, I forget what it a story but at the end of the story i forget
what it was but at the end of the story there's a zinger for whoever he's telling the story to
like you know your life is this with the zinger at the end i believe this is when it starts
happening he has it with the janitor at one point and i wish i would have wrote it down i did write
down i did write down the example of it but i didn't write down what exactly what he said and
so well they're talking about things on their bucket list and oh no sorry that's the janitor I did write down the example of it, but I didn't write down what exactly what he said. And so.
Well, they're talking about things on their bucket list.
And oh, no, sorry.
That's the janitor with the old man version of the janitor. And he says, do things on your bucket list.
And the janitor suggests punching a whale.
And the old man says, oh, I punched a whale.
I laughed at that.
Went down like Liston.
Went down like Liston.
That's right.
Went down like Liston. What's Liston?, that's right. Went down like Liston.
What's Liston?
Boxer?
Sonny Liston.
Sonny Liston was a boxer.
He was the, if I'm correct, the champ before Muhammad Ali.
Muhammad Ali took the title from him.
Nice.
Ken is funny in this episode.
But that's what I'm saying.
This was when the assassin became the assassin.
He was always funny, but now he has a specific role in the show.
His job is to come in, say an important sentence,
but at the end give a zinger.
Yeah, that's true.
Well, he comes over to me and he says, it's come to my attention that you're having a relationship with a colleague,
and I need to know about that.
Was she naughty?
Was she naughty?
I bet she was a hell of a cat.
I bet she was a hell of a cat.
You know what?
Never mind.
Never mind.
All right.
We're going to take a quick break, everybody, as we do, and we're going to bring in a guest and talk to them.
Hopefully, they'll be delightful.
We'll be right back.
When you find that bright spot to help you get through your day, it's powerful. That's where
The Bright Side comes in. A new daily podcast from Hello Sunshine that's bringing you a daily dose of
joy. I'm Danielle Robay. And I'm Simone Boyce. Listen, both Danielle and I are reporters. We've
covered the news and we know the world can feel heavy.
But the Bright Side podcast is a space to have a little fun,
to learn something new and get into some friendly debates.
That's right.
Join us five days a week to see how life can look from the bright side. We'll hear from celebrities, authors, experts and listeners like you.
Whether it's relationships, friend advice or figuring out how to navigate life's transitions,
we'll talk through it all together.
Listen to The Bright Side from Hello Sunshine
every weekday on the iHeartRadio app,
Apple Podcasts,
or wherever you get your podcasts.
All that sitting and swiping,
our backs hurt,
our eyeballs sting,
that's our bodies adapting to our technology.
But we can do something about it. We saw amazing effects. I really felt like the cloud in my brain kind of dissipated. There's
no turning back for me. Make 2024 the year you put your health before your inbox and take the
Body Electric Challenge. Listen to Body Electric from NPR on the iHeartRadio app or wherever you get your podcasts.
Hi, I'm Martha Stewart, and we're back with a new season of my podcast.
This season will be even more revealing and more personal, with more entrepreneurs,
more trailblazers, more live events, more Martha, and more questions from you.
more live events, more Martha, and more questions from you. I'm talking to my cosmetic dermatologist, Dr. Dan Belkin, about the secrets behind my skincare. Walter Isaacson, about the geniuses
who change the world. Encore Jane, about creating a billion-dollar startup. Dr. Elisa Pressman,
about the five basic strategies to help parents raise good humans.
Florence Fabrikant about the authenticity in the world of food writing. Be sure to tune in to
season two of the Martha Stewart podcast. Listen and subscribe to the Martha Stewart podcast on
the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
I used to have so many men.
How this beguiling woman in her 50s...
She looked like a million bucks.
...with zero qualifications...
She had a Harvard plaque.
...tricks her way past a wall of lawyers and agents...
She's got all of these Maseratis and Bentleys all in the driveway.
Is it like a mansion?
Yes, it's a mansion.
That this queen of the con uses to scam some of the biggest names in professional sports out of untold fortunes.
About six million.
Approximately 11 million dollars.
Nearly 10 million dollars was all gone.
Nearly $10 million was all gone.
Employing whatever means necessary to bleed her victims dry.
She would probably have sex with one of her clients.
Hide your money in your old rich man because she is on the prowl.
Listen to Queen of the Con, Season 5, The Athlete Whisperer on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. We can talk Star Wars or sing show tunes, you know, like a baller.
Smoke some jazz cabbage.
Maybe talk about the episode.
So come on, Joelle, let's get the show on the road.
Ladies and gentlemen, give it up for Matthew Tockelfeld!
Hi, guys.
Tell us, one of you is Matthew.
Who's the other?
We're both Matthew.
Oh, that makes it very easy.
Yes.
And I can just solely tell by your very young faces that you win youngest guest we've ever had on the show.
Ever.
How old are you guys?
19.
I'm 20.
19 and 20.
Oh, well, you both look a bit younger um you're gonna your fake
ids are not gonna work when you get um you're wearing uh a merch from the podcast which we
appreciate yes and on the wall behind you is that a is that what is that behind you is that a bojack
thing yeah okay we like bojack so do we, yeah Welcome to the program, guys
We're so happy when young folks find the show
Because, you know, we were never friends-level successful
The show
So when younger generations find it
We're always so happy
How did you guys find it?
Discover it?
Your parents or something?
I had a friend
One of my best friends back home uh told
me you have to watch scrubs it's so funny and so i watched it and then i watched it again and then i
watched it again oh thanks man thank you matt you know what you should do you should tell all your
friends the same thing because your generation is obsessed with friends. And Donald and I would really – and the office.
But we'd like someone I'd love to.
Friends has to be included.
Yeah.
Guys, this is Tim Holbert, who's one of the writers of the show.
And he wrote this particular episode we're talking about.
Tim, say hi to the young men.
Matthew and Matthew.
Hi, Tim.
Tim has kids your age, so he knows what joelle
tim's uh tim's son is actually our really good and close friend charlie really wait a second
joelle hooked me up oh joelle what the hell's going on here what is going on here here and
there you know what is going on here i'm trying? Here I am bragging about how a new generation is finding Scrubs.
It's the fucking writer's son's friend.
But wait a minute, Zach.
Zach, these guys are giant Scrubs fans and both theater nerds,
and one of them is also a sports freak.
So it's like it's all what you and Donald are about.
I know.
You guys are the eye of
the me and donald storm if you like especially which which one of you likes sports and musicals
well the one that has a boston celtics hat on zach oh sorry well i i love that because that's
a rare donald and bill are both rare examples of the of the of of men who love both musicals and sports.
Very small circle.
There's not a lot of us.
In the Venn diagram, there's not a whole lot.
No.
There's probably seven of you on earth.
Boys, gentlemen, sorry, young men, did you have a question for us?
Yes.
We each had a question. I guess i'll go first yeah okay um my question is about uh the guest stars that you guys had it
relates to the guest stars that you guys had on scrubs because obviously you had an incredible
cast there every week but you also got to work with like some really cool people that just came in for an episode or two.
But I have a question for you guys.
If you guys could guest star
on a show...
Oh, good question.
What would you choose?
You already know,
Matthew! I do know.
I had a feeling that your answer might be...
His answer's going to come in the form of
singing an orchestral
theme song.
Dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun- Mandalorian. Thank you for the beautiful segue, Matthew. Did you watch this weekend? Did you watch Wednesday? You have not watched Wednesday.
I haven't watched the newest one.
Joelle, have you watched The Book of Boba Fett?
I texted you right after, so you know
I did.
It was insane.
Oh my god.
Don't feel bad for the actor playing Boba Fett
because people are most excited
about episodes he's not in.
Yeah, that kind of sucks.
That does kind of suck.
That does kind of suck.
But something got
in the episodes he wasn't in.
Thank you, right. But
I will say this. Thank you for not
putting them in those episodes and putting out
what you put out because those have been
two of the best Star Wars period period, in a long time.
In a long, long time.
And it's so good that I would even say I could watch that show even if there's no action in it.
I could watch that.
You know, there's something that for some reason is not in a lot of Star Wars movies, and it's always a small part of it, and it should be way more.
But the training is so fucking fire.
Why do we keep going away from this?
Why do we keep doing other things?
My point is, fucking Boba Fett, episode six, best Star Wars I've seen in a long time.
Anyway, let's move on.
Dave Looney's ready for a feature.
All right.
I'm going to go for it.
There's a comedy I love called The Other Two.
I love that.
Great show.
Yeah.
I think you guys should watch it because it's got,
it definitely is a scrubzy-esque tone and humor.
It's about, it's on, what is it on uh these days i think it's on hbo max
hbo max check it out it's about uh it's about a family molly shannon plays the mom and uh and
and there's three siblings and one becomes a huge like justin bieber level pop star and the other
two are kind of fuck-ups and it's about the other two trying to live with like
a new mega famous justin bieber uh brother and it's brilliant hilarious there's two seasons
i would love to be be on that show that's the one that first came to my mind
on the other side of the spectrum i would say uh succession because that's such a good show
dude you know what you know what just the soundtrack alone for succession is fucking fire the other side of the spectrum i would say uh succession because that's such a good show dude
you know what you know what just the soundtrack alone for succession is fucking fire dude
yeah the theme song is my alarm it's his alarm really comes on and i'm like yo that song comes
on and i'm like i spit game five like playing five like out of nowhere to start rapping. I know. Some rappers should sample that theme song.
For sure.
I love a good theme song.
Yeah, so anything in the Star Wars universe.
Lawrence and I have a specific dance we do to the British Bake Off theme song.
Love it.
That is very brave of you to admit.
It's amazing.
It's a great theme.
Okay, next question.
Yes.
Matthew number two.
Revivals.
They're a really big thing in theater right now.
I know we've just got Music Man revival with Hugh Jackman and Sutton Foster.
Wait, Hugh Jackman is going back.
Hugh Jackman and Sutton Foster are going back to Broadway to do the Music Man.
It's in previews about to open.
It's going to be the show of the year.
It's huge.
Can he win again?
Can he get nominated again for that, though?
Is that possible?
It never opened, my bro.
Oh, wait a second.
Didn't Hugh Jackman do The Music Man on Broadway like five years ago?
No.
Hugh Jackman and Sutton Foster were going to open the show last year.
It got COVIDified. Got it it and so everything got pushed and now it's about to open and for those
of you who don't know Sutton Foster is like one of the biggest Broadway stars there is she's
incredible she can dance she can sing a lot of people just know her from that show Younger oh
yeah you might know her from Younger if you she's she's awesome she's a friend of mine she's so fucking cool and she can she's like one of the best tap dancers on
broadway and and and hugh is a really good tap dancer so you know they're gonna do a big ass
tap dance number in music man anyway yes yes you got me all we got me all riled up we can geek out
about this is like this is like you talking mandorian. I got all titillated about the music man.
By the way, the music man, just so you know,
the music man was my, I think I probably said this before
because we've done a lot of these,
but the music man was my very first audition
for the community theater production.
I auditioned for Winthrop, the little boy,
and then got a chorus part and did it.
But there you go.
It was my very first audition.
That was me with Oliver.
Oliver was my-
Oh, really?
What did you get?
I just did Artful Dodger, and I was also in the chorus.
So I got to pick pockets and stuff.
Oh, I love the Artful Dodger.
I played the Artful Dodger at theater camp.
Not to brag or anything.
So anyway, producers are looking to modernize those stories
and reinvent important moments.
If you guys could revive any musical, what musical would you choose to revive and how would you modernize?
Great question.
Great question.
These guys are on fire.
I bet you they go to a posh L.A. private school before they graduate.
They go to Wisconsin.
What?
They go from Milwaukee.
Oh, I thought because they were your son's friends that they...
No, they're all at college.
Oh, are you at Madison?
Marquette.
Oh, okay.
That's where...
D. Wade.
D. Wade went to Marquette, yo.
We also have Chris Farley.
And your boy...
Not only did D. Wade go to Marquette,
but didn't your boy Jimmy Buckets go to Marquette too?
Jimmy Butler?
Yeah.
I'm not wearing my Dwayne Wade jersey right now.
Yep, yep, yep.
Both played for Miami.
It's a great question.
Donald, do you have an answer?
If I could model.
The trend on Broadway, again, for those of you who have no interest or care, is often to take these musicals.
Some people do a traditional version.
I think Music Man is a pretty traditional version of it.
And some people deconstruct it.
Like there there's a touring version of Oklahoma.
I recommend if it comes to your city,
you see where they really deconstructed Oklahoma and did a really kind of
out of the box,
darker version of the story.
And they're doing the,
someone did one with West side story.
So that's the sort of trend.
But they're taking the same music and the same dialogue
and just putting it in a different setting?
Yeah, but it's like saying like,
this isn't your grandmother's Oklahoma.
This is going to like,
Oklahoma has some dark shit that happens in it
and we're going to tease all that out.
And gosh, the first thing that came to my mind
was either Pippin or godspell those are
favorites of mine um that could be that could be that could be cool to deconstruct donald don't
say the whiz go well the whiz was deconstructed actually that was the deconstruction yes the Wizard of Oz. Oh, checkmate. I would, I would, if I could change, if I could.
If he says The Mandalorian, I'm signing off.
I wouldn't turn any show into The Mandalorian,
but I would definitely, I would find,
I would want to redo Chorus Line because I think all the music
and all of that stuff is great and the dancing is great
and it takes place on a stage,
but theater is a lot different than it was back then you know what i mean it's way different and so maybe spice up the maybe
spice up the music a little bit change the dance numbers a little bit to something more modern and
everything like that so if i could do anything maybe chorus line would be the one because you
can't go wrong with that music that was my father's favorite show he He saw it nine times. You can't go wrong with that music, though. That's why, Zach.
I really need this job.
Great fucking number.
I've got to get this job.
Who am I anyway?
I know.
I'll find a way.
This is the best line.
This was the commercial for the damn show.
Who am I anyway?
Go ahead.
Am I my resume?
I don't know
what the rest of the question is.
That was beautiful.
Did you guys see the new
West Side Story, by the way? The Spielberg West Side Story?
That's another version. Did you watch it, by the way, Dom?
You just got it to me. Me and my wife
have a date night tonight. Oh, good.
Watch it, please, because I thought it was, granted, I don't know who the audience is
other than me and people who love musicals, but it's beautiful.
The cinematography, Janusz Kaminski, the costumes, the sets, and a young gal named Rachel Zelger,
who is a Jersey native, that's why I root for her.
Won the cattle casting
and is incredible.
And I highly recommend
you check it out. We're going to watch it tonight.
Go ahead. I loved it.
It was beautiful. One of the prettiest movies
I've ever seen. The cinematography, if he doesn't
win, I mean, there was a lot of great cinematography
this year. In fact, Tick, Tick, Boom,
which was the other musical, which I
loved even more.
We both.
I loved it.
I have such a man crush on Andrew Garfield
now.
I have a very serious question to ask
the two of you.
Did you like
La La Land?
Oh, boy.
This interview is over.
Good night, guys.
I don't like that pause.
Thank you for coming on.
We're done.
We're done.
We're done.
We're done.
Just lie to him.
We're done.
He used to drunk tweet.
I loved it, Donald.
I loved it.
Thank you.
You guys, he used to, if you recall,
he used to drunk tweet about it on the airplanes.
He would get hammered, put it on, and drunk tweet about it.
I would get pissed off about how Emma freaking leaves Ryan for freaking the dude from that thing you do.
No, I'd be like checking.
This is back when I was really reading Twitter.
And I'd be like, oh, no, he's drunk tweeting about all of that.
And he'd be like, he invested in her career.
Why couldn't he play jazz in Paris?
Oh, shit.
Yeah, it's real talk.
Tim, you don't know this.
What's up, man?
We know your opinion, but Zach, what do you think of La La Land?
I think it's amazing.
I love it.
I thought the music was beautiful.
I thought the way it was shot was beautiful.
I love both those actors.
I think Emma Stone can do no wrong.
And I really like Ryan Gosling.
And people said, oh, anyone's critique of it, I, I really like Ryan Gosling. I thought it was, and people said,
Oh,
anyone's critique of it.
Like,
I don't agree with,
I love the ending,
the way they,
the way they handled like the,
the other dimension where they had,
where things had worked out.
And I just thought it was so beautiful.
And I'm the biggest sucker in the world for a love that cannot be in love.
That doesn't work out.
And directors who have the balls to make movies without the happy ending. And that's the and love that doesn't work out and directors who have the
balls to make movies without the happy ending and that's the best part about it man yeah i you know
i love a i i i love uh if you want to make me cry i i the story is going to be uh love that
cannot be either romantic love or familial love i'm'm just, that's, I'm a sucker for that.
All right, boys, it's time for Wisconsin's favorite segment.
It's time to fix your life!
We're fixing that shit!
It's going to be a mutual fix.
I hope we can help.
Okay.
Oh, yeah.
So, as I said before, I'm a huge, huge sports fan.
Yeah.
Like, it's...
More than musicals, or is it equal?
It's equal. Like, I'm a theater major, so, like, that's what I want to do with my life.
Right.
But it's almost unhealthy how much my emotional status is connected to whether my team wins or loses.
What are your teams other than the boston celtics um so it's weird because they're all over the
place we don't care so the new orleans saints is my football team okay celtics is my basketball
team and the san francisco giants is my baseball team now what's your hockey team? The Boston Bruins. Okay. Really? Yeah.
Also, Seattle Kraken
because that's near where I'm from. And your cricket
team?
I can give you my favorite tennis
player. Who's your favorite tennis player?
Who's your favorite tennis player? Rafael Nadal, hands down.
Nadal, wow. Is he the one that keeps
trying to sneak into Australia? No, that's
Djokovic. Yeah, Djokovic. Stop trying to sneak into Australia? No, that's Djokovic.
Yeah, Djokovic. Stop trying to get into Australia, bro.
He probably would have won that Open if he would have got in, though.
He keeps trying to sneak in, being like,
I took the horse thing.
I took the horse thing.
Oh, shit.
Bro, we have the tournament. All right, so go ahead.
So anyway, the question is, I guess,
well, he lets sports teams command his mood.
I wake up in the morning and I check the news
and I see another big-name celebrity has passed on.
And my emotional tether is a little too close
to whether celebrities live or die.
His emotional tether is determined on too close to whether celebrities live or die his emotional tether is
determined on whether his team wins or loses so i don't really talk to people after the celtics
lose okay that's that's the question is it just the celtics losing or is it it's mostly like if
the saints lose and their season ends then i'll be like really upset about it but it's really when
james winston went out this year,
you were like,
you were pissed off for the rest of the season,
pretty much.
Yeah, but I wasn't like super invested
after Drew Brees left.
Jameis Winston's going to freaking be great for you guys.
Is Larry Bird still on the team?
No, not anymore.
Come on.
I know about point.
I learned about point shaving.
Is Larry Bird still point shaving on the team?
Larry Bird has never point shaved in his life.
That's blasphemy.
Okay.
And we see that.
What's the position I learned?
He was a small forward.
Larry Bird was a small.
No, what was the position I learned?
Point guard.
You learned point guard.
Was he the point guard?
No, he was a small forward.
Okay.
Stop yelling at me.
Go ahead.
Anyway, so I allow that like kind of ruin my day and he was a wreck after betty white died
even though it was she was 100 years old almost she had an amazing life go ahead what's the
question i guess is fix your life i mean the the fix your life i guess is uh how do how do we not
let that ruin our entire days well i don't know about ruining come on now you can not let that ruin our entire days? Well, I don't know about ruining.
Come on now.
You can't let that shit ruin you.
In all honesty, come on, bro.
That shit's ruining their day, man.
No, I have a question.
When the Celtics lose, and I understand you're a tired fan,
I understand being upset,
but you're talking about for more than 20 minutes,
your whole day is ruined?
No.
Or are you exaggerating?
I'm exaggerating but it it
also depends on the on like the nature of the loss yeah the bigger the bigger the loss the the the
more it hurts i totally get it um i'm gonna tell you something right now yeah donald has to answer
that part of the question because this is the honest to goodness truth i got into fantasy football
and it made it so football wasn't that serious anymore
because I went crazy for like a year and a half during football season,
trying to get my lineup in,
trying to figure out who was the best fucking running back to get me to most
points and all of that stuff.
And at the end of the day, when I won that,
when I won my fantasy football league, I got nothing.
Like I got a couple of hundred bucks and that was it.
And I realized my fandom has gone so far that I'm fucking stressing the little things.
So when the Knicks, they've never won in my lifetime.
They've never won a thing in my lifetime.
I've let it go.
I'm on the path of a Jedi now.
The job for you, Matthew,
is to figure out a way
to understand that it's just sports.
And that's all it is, man. At the end of the day,
what the Boston Celtics
eat does not
make you shit.
That's beautiful, Donald. And tell my
son, Charlie, that about the Brewers, too.
And I want you to think about
those players going home. They're pissed Brewers too. And I want you to think about those players going home.
They're pissed off too.
But then they drive home in a Lamborghini to their mansions.
And they're not that upset.
So we need to calm down.
They don't give two.
You know what I mean?
I'm going to give you a cognitive behavioral tool.
What's a favorite food you love?
Like a milkshake or a cheeseburger or something?
What's your favorite thing to eat?
Something vegan?
We don't know.
No, no.
Something.
Is there something?
Not the vegan shit.
Something you both love.
Can I go with milkshake?
Everybody loves a milkshake.
Yeah, yeah.
So what you're going to do is when the team loses or the famous treasured celebrity dies,
you are going to say, I go get a giant milkshake.
Because you at least are going to give yourself, your brain,
a consolation prize.
And you'll get to the point where you'll be rooting
for that famous celebrity to die.
Because you'll want a milkshake.
That is fire. you'll be like come on ed asner you're holding on he passed he just passed he just passed that's not a milkshake
yeah well you guys who do a milkshake for Ed Asner. Rest in peace.
That was genius.
Fucking genius.
All right, let's go out.
You always go out on a laugh, Tim.
That's a comedy-ready thing.
Always go out on a laugh, but who was the guy who played the vet at the end that salutes you?
And why the fuck was he sitting behind the guy?
His name was Buddy, and he was the generator operator.
Yes, he was!
I was wondering if you knew that.
Wait, was he in transportation?
Yes, he was.
In the transportation department,
there's someone who monitors the power generator.
He's called the Jenny Op, we call him.
And Buddy was our Jenny Op for many years.
He had a great face.
Yeah, well, at the end of the day... So now, instead of going on that laugh, we're going out and Buddy was our genny op for many years. He had a great face. Yeah, well, at the end of the...
So now instead of going on that laugh, we're going
out on Buddy's face. Yes.
Buddy's face. Oh, and we should mention
the whole flag thing. That was
very, very stonerific. Now, that
is very stonerific because they took cardboard
cutouts. It didn't look
horrible, by the way. My girlfriend
watched it and she was just in
Black Widow and she was like, how'd you do that and i said i don't really remember for you know for whatever year it was it
didn't look horrible for for i mean there was that was you were you holding on to the flag
that was green screen that part yeah no it wasn't i couldn't tell if it was green screen or not you
were up there i think you were up on that flagpole, if I remember correctly.
You were.
I was up on the pole, but I don't think... Oh, yeah, I was up on the pole,
and there was a crane involved holding my legs.
Something had to pull your legs up, yeah.
And, Donald, I love how those other janitors
just accepted you into their clique.
Yeah, I'm part of the team, too.
We all go do this.
As long as we're AJD.
Oh, because I embarrassed you with Carla's wrong name.
Yeah, you said it was something
else. And I go and I say Juanita.
And I go and say that to her.
And she goes, you think my middle name's Juanita?
And the fucked up shit is that he goes...
And you say she's Puerto Rican.
Yeah, you say her middle name is Juanita.
And I say, I knew it was something Puerto Rican.
And by the way,
Bill does that at parties.
I'll be like,
hey, Bill,
who's that guy again?
And Bill just tell me
the wrong name
and I'll go over
and fucking say it.
Oh, it's so mean.
Hey, Jim, how's it going?
Yeah.
I've done that to people,
but it's really mean to do that.
It's so embarrassing.
All right, that's the show.
You guys have been great guests.
Tim, I hope you'll come back.
I swear to God,
I had more fun
than I've had in so long.
You're a great guest
and you guys were great guests.
And thank you, Joelle, for doing that.
And thanks, Joelle.
Oh, pleasure.
And guys, you're a delight.
You are a nice young man, and I hope that you enjoy it.
Who have our interests.
Yes, who have our same interests.
And let's just hope Jiminsky, let's just hope, let's just.
Mike Jiminsky?
You're going to do a Mike Jiminsky joke?
They don't know who Jiminsky is.
Oh, I love Jeminski.
I just hope that Larry Bird kills it this season and stops poaching.
It'd be good.
If Larry Bird's not on the team, we get a milkshake.
Could we?
Yes.
Yeah, take that picture.
This is my...
I'm going to screenshot.
Okay, ready?
Did you do it?
There it is.
Thank you so much.
You know, it's interesting about having, you know, most guests ask for a picture.
The young men were able to do it in under 45 seconds.
So impressive.
So impressive.
There's your big laugh, Zach.
There you go.
Always got a big laugh, everybody.
Five, six, seven, eight. I said he's got stories about a show we made
About a bunch of doctors and nurses
And a janitor who loved to hate
I said he's got stories that we all should know
So gather round to hear our
Gather round to hear our
Scrubs Rewatch Show with Zach and Donald
Hi, friends. I'm Danielle Robay. Here on Scrubs, we watch a show with Zach and Donald. Mm-hmm.
Hi, friends. I'm Danielle Robay.
And I'm Simone Boyce.
And we're here to introduce you to The Bright Side,
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I used to have so many men.
How this beguiling woman in her 50s.
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