Fake Doctors, Real Friends with Zach and Donald - 710: My Waste of Time

Episode Date: January 31, 2023

On this week's episode, Dr. Cox becomes interim Chief of Medicine, Turk and Carla consider having another child, and JD and Elliot rekindle their friendship. In the real world, Donald is rapping again, thanks to AI. Plus, we do some dramatic script readings on Guy Love. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Hi, I'm Martha Stewart, and we're back with a new season of my podcast. This season will be even more revealing and more personal with more entrepreneurs, more live events, and more questions from you. I'm talking to my cosmetic dermatologist, Dr. Dan Belkin, about the secrets behind my skincare. Encore Jane about creating a billion-dollar startup. Walter Isaacson about the geniuses who changed the world.

Listen and subscribe to the Martha Stewart Podcast on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Okay, I am now recording in the new studio. It's going to be a little loud. It's going to be a little echoey, yeah. Is this going to be your permanent residence? I don't think so because it's going to be a little loud. It's going to be a little echoey, yeah. Is this going to be your permanent residence? I don't think so, because it's in the middle of the home. Yeah, no, it won't be.

Tell us about your new home. Congratulations. Mazel tov, as my people say. Thank you very, very, very, very much. It's under construction still. Yeah. DWP just came through. So you have gas? Not a lot of stuff is to code. Yeah. DWP just came through. So you have gas?

Not a lot of stuff is to code. Oh. I see. I got some fixings to do. Yeah. But it's exciting. That room you're in is really cool. It's got one of those library ladders, listeners.

I love a library ladder. I'm a sucker for a library ladder. You could be like Belle and swing. What is she saying? That's her opening song. What's her opening song? Come on, Donald. This is your business. Do you want to know it for real?

Do you want me to sing it? I just want you to sing one line. There goes the baker with his tray like always. Yes. The same old bread and rose to sell. You can sing that. You can sing that on your, on your library ladder. No,

I don't want to do that. Oh, isn't this amazing? It's my favorite part. Because you see, you make a lovely bell, Donald audience. He has gotten up on the ladder.

I saw this. Yeah, audience, he's sliding on the ladder. I saw this meme that was like, if she's the only one that reads in this town and he loans her the books for free, this is obviously a front. I posted that. And yes, 200%. You're saying it's a weed store? I don't know what's going on. Something's going down. How is that guy making money?

I mean, no one. I made the mistake of walking. Well, it wasn't a mistake, but I was just really young. But I walked into a record store to try and buy like Belle Biv DeVos Poison or something like that. And it was a record store front. Really, they were selling weed in there. But they fronted like it was a record store. So they had all the posters up and shit like that, but

no inventory. No inventory. They had like one record in each slot. And I was like, yeah, you got that new Belle Biv DeVoe? And he looked at me and he was like, nah. Nah. I got that poison, though. You want that poison? That new Belle Biv DeVoe.

That's funny. Good to see you. I was just in New York doing a Paley Center panel. How did that go? For Bill's new show. It was very funny. Lots of laughs. Can you see those online, Joelle?

Is that something people can watch? I don't know. I don't know. We'll Google it. But we did a panel. Everyone but Mr. Ford was there, and it was a blast. We laughed our butts off. Show was really good.

I know I'm, I can say that because I only directed one episode. It's not like it's my baby or anything. So I can tell you objectively, it's very, very funny and very heartfelt. And I think you're going to love it. And everybody check it out. It's on Apple TV+. The first three drop, not the whole thing. The first three.

Everybody check it out. It's on Apple TV+. The first three drop, not the whole thing. The first three. You know, I prefer it when streaming services just let you watch the whole thing straight up. I don't. But that's just me. I like looking forward, like with White Lotus Season 2 as an example, I loved the old school feeling of being like, oh my God, we have to wait until next week.

I like that. It makes you talk about it all week. I hate that. You do? I hate that. I don't like it. I like watching the movie. I don't like watching the all right but as a producer of content don't you find that oh no i talk about it talk about it more if you string it out if you just binge it you if you just binge the

whole thing you might like the next day be like oh i've been such and such it was good meanwhile stringing it out for weeks you're like oh my god are you watching white lotus season two it's so good i don't know stranger things everybody binged stranger things and that wasn't a you know what i mean or i don't know i just feel like i feel like i like the movie better you know what i mean than the show that's just me though okay i hear you um did you watch uh my nephew got me all excited to watch this video game show that everyone's very into. I did not watch it. Oh, my God.

Zach. Did you watch it? Yes. Oh, yes. Listen, I knew nothing about it. And I was excited because it got, you know, everyone loves it. It's my nephew's favorite video game. I got all stoked.

I'm watching it. I'm proud, happy for everyone involved. And I'm like, oh, zombies. Come on. proud of happy for everyone involved then i'm like oh zombies come on but they're like the most inventive zombies i've ever seen they're really cool like that opening scene in the first movie where it's like a talk show back in the 60s and they're explaining what would happen if fungus could live inside of humans like immediately i was like i am so freaked out horrified it could actually does exist it it actually does exist is what we found out in the news if you read uh i know but it it infects ants yeah all right listen i like a zombie ant you like zombie movies donald you

watch a zombie show i fucking hate zombie movies yeah i'm not a zombie guy oh why do you guys hate zombies you just lost me in zombies you lost me it's boring it's the same shit over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and yo i can tell you this look check this out dawn of the dead and what's the name of that show? Resident Evil. Sure. The video game. And what's the name of that? Walking Dead. Yeah. And World War Z. And guess what they all have in common?

Zombies. The same plot. Zombies. But that's like, oh, it's a theme. That's it. That's a theme. That's my thing. I know.

I agree. I feel like a zombie movie. You might every now and then create some unique way of how they're created or something like that, but for the most part, it's the same shit. I agree. You know what the plot of a zombie movie is?

What? Zombies. Oh my gosh. Do you guys like the trope of like Lone Wolf and Little Cub? I know you do, Donald, because you're in Tomato. Listen, we're in the minority. This is a hugely popular show, and I'm happy for everyone involved. I'm just, zombies are not my jam.

That's fair. My nephew's like swiping away tears. But Daniel, you must have played the game. He obviously has a connection to the game. He loves the music. He loves the characters. Yeah, and how faithful it is to the game is what's really what people are really happy about especially after uncharted which is also the based on a game made by the same company

people were like well that you know no hate sucked but last of us is extremely faithful and pedro pascal bella ramsey are knocking in out of the park. In my humble opinion. He's going to host SNL with Coldplay. I'll be tuning in. I went to SNL too, which was so fun. Bill and I went on a man date. Bill and I had the best man date. Fuck you!

Why? You weren't in town, baby girl. We don't go on man dates anymore. You don't like to be up past 8.30 I don't, you're right, I don't Bill and I went to a really nice dinner And then we went to see comedy At the Comedy Cellar in Manhattan on McDougal Which is the best comedy place in Manhattan

And my stepsister was on, Jessica Curson Who's a hilarious comedian And then we went to SNL And Aubrey Plaza and Sam Smith were on the show, and that was so fun. Did he do? Yes. Did he do? Mommy don't know.

I didn't know that was him, by the way. Did she come out, too? Mm-hmm. Oh, shit. Ooh, daddy, daddy. She was under his dress. He was wearing this big dress, and then he was in this giant dress and then he lifted up the dress and she came out right joelle you see that yes yeah she crawled right out from under it

and it was adorable she crushes the whole verse man so good speaking of which uh we're gonna get to it later in the show we have something special for you today um we've i did some experimenting with chat gpt is that how you say it? Like everyone else is. And we have some AI-created Scrubs content. Oh, gosh. And some of it's beautiful. Some of it's beautiful.

There's a scene about JD and Turk riding an eagle. This is just to tee it up so you don't miss the end of the show. There's a scene about JD and Turk discussing guy love, which is very beautiful. Then I asked it to write a rap about J.D. and Turk in the style of Meg the Stallion. And to write a rap in the style of Busta Rhymes. The Busta Rhymes one is funny. It's like J.D. and Turk now. Busta Rhymes now. I love Busta. rhymes when it's funny it's like jd and turt now buster rhymes now i love buster often mentioned himself in his raps i don't remember that from the but who doesn't from the dungeon dragon change your shitty drawers because your pants are sagging chicken ch, the chocolate chicken, the real cock diesel.

Come on, man. Busta Rhymes. The rhythm is in sync. My rhymes is on time. Come on, man. Yeah. I was peeing on music videos at the height of the Busta Rhymes sensation. Yo, look.

One of the best MCs to ever do it, Busta Rhymes. That's for real, for real. No bull. Well, certainly. Yeah. Well, I'm saying yeah bull. Well, certainly. Yeah. Well, I'm saying yeah like I know. Yeah? Yeah.

No, but like if you would ever do, if you would ever do like a top 75, like you know how they have the top 75 NBA players of all time? Yeah. Busta Rhymes is definitely in the top 75 NBA players of all time. They would do it that way. NBA players of all time. Do you it that way NBA players of all time do you have a favorite Busta song Donald?

I have so many favorite Busta the stuff that he did with Baby Sham and Flip Mode Squad Flip Mode is the squad that record's fire look that was the introduction of Rod Digger introduction of so many people

one of my favorite some of the best lines I love Busta Rod Digger, introduction of so many people. One of my favorite, got on a move. Pardon me, Duke. Some of the best lines. I love Busta, but my favorite Busta Rhymes song ever is Scenario. That's a good one. But that's only because of all the other people that are on it and how when he, it was like the introduction to Busta Rhymes, right? So you knew him if you were a fan of Leaders of the New School.

That's one of the best songs ever made. I like the one he did with Janet. That one was... Wu-Tang Forever. All right. I can't contribute to this conversation at all. I liked it. I liked listening to it.

Let's get into the show. Donald Faze on Countess Inn. Five, six, seven, eight. Some stories about a show we made About a bunch of doctors and nurses show donald faze on count us in what a wacky episode this is i mean To hear our Scrubs Rewatch Show with Zach and Donald. What a wacky episode this is. I mean, here's the thing. This is the last episode, I believe, before the writer's strike began. That's what Scrubs Wiki said.

Now, just to remind you what was going on, this is 2008, and the Writers Guild of America was about to go on strike. But what was interesting is that this is a very short season, season seven, because the writers' strike, Bill was pretty sure the show was ending, I think. He thought the writers' strike would ultimately, I don't think our ratings were as high as they used to be, and he thought the writers' strike might kill it. And so this is episode 10 of 11 in this season. It's called My Waste of Time. And then the 11th one was one which was an homage to Princess Bride, and it's called My Princess. And I'm really proud of that episode. And you've heard me say this before. It's really cool. But I think it was unfairly judged because Bill was sort of scrambling. And some people thought like it was meant to be a, uh,

you know, uh, a season, a series finale, but no, it was meant to be just a special episode, but it got kind of treated like, Oh,

we're going out like this. And everyone was like, that's how you're ending the show. Um, so rewatch it. If you're a person who rewatches the show, because I think it's a pretty awesome episode of, of TV. And we're going to discuss it next week too.

Of course we will. I'm just saying it's, there's just a little trivia about why this season only has, uh, 11 episodes. I thought this was a very wacky episode. I thought it had a lot of funny moments in it though. I laughed a lot. I laughed a lot. It's got some wacky ass shit in it though. They were throwing a lot of, a lot, the kitchen sink was getting thrown. Yeah. I'm just going to put it, though. They were throwing a lot of shit. The kitchen sink was getting thrown.

Yeah, I'm just going to put it like this. This is Robert Macchio's episode for some of the most Oh, my God. I can't believe they put that. We'll get to it, but I can't believe they put that on NBC. I remember this whole ball thing being very

tricky. I remember shooting this. Because you notice they never cut to any of the stuff we talk about in Walmart. And they shot footage of it, but they weren't allowed to use any of the pictures of the fake nuts. Yeah. I remember us doing that scene where we're looking at the balls. Yeah, in Walmart.

And we were cracking up. And I remember us doing the scene in the ice house. Yeah, we'll get there. We'll get there. But do you remember, like, there's this thing called truck nuts that guys and gals who have truck hitches on their pickup trucks or whatever can put these fake balls that hang down. Sagging balls, yes. Yeah, and they're called truck nuts, right? Is that what they're called?

I don't know what they're called, but that sounds right. I just remember in the display cases, there were all sorts of testicle things, and some of them just to fill the cases were truck nuts. This is a real thing, actually, for those of you who think it might be false. No. Really? Absolutely, as you can get a prosthetic testicle if you are self-conscious because you've had one or two removed absolutely i did not know that well you can double check that but

i'm not that's true i don't need to look at it but you can't get like a heated one is my point no no no and i don't think you're allowed to get a third one added if you've got two real ones i think i think well i don't know you know in this day and age it'd be kind of cool it would be kind of cool if that was like a secret weapon that you had attached to your body. Yeah. Like a nut laser. Eww! No, what about if you had like just a unique thing to hit on women?

Like, hey, I've got three balls. I've got a C. Yeah. And she or he is like, show me. Show me. Show me. As important as choosing the right destination when traveling is choosing the right travel partner. Gene!

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Listen to Fodor's Guide to Espionage on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. I used to have so many men. How this beguiling woman in her 50s. She looked like a million bucks. With zero qualifications. She had a Harvard plaque. Tricks her way past a wall of lawyers and agents.

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Directed by Chris Koch. I hang out with Andy Schwartz. And Andy Schwartz, as we've told you, is the grandson of the legendary Sherman Schwartz who created many TV shows, including The Brady Bunch and Gilligan's Island, right? Yes, Gilligan's Island. Which I grew up on. I think I've told you that my mom would judge time for me as a child.

I'd say, how much longer? And she'd say, two Gilligan's Islands. And Chris Koch, who was one of our favorite directors of the show Scrubs. So Dr. Cox has become the intern chief of medicine because Kelso has retired. He's the new chief of medicine, yes. Yes, and he wants to be called chief by everybody. I understand that. Yes, he would like anyone to refer to him as the chief.

I like his and Jordan's little storyline where they sit on the couch and do all of the work while the brain trust has now taken over Kelso's office as the new clubhouse. Yes, the brain trust has planted themselves. They're, what do you call it, squatting. They're squatting in Kelso's office. Ted and Todd and Doug and the janitor have taken it over, and that's where they plan to hold all their tri-daily. Now, keep in mind, they have tri-daily brain trust meetings.

Meetings, yes. How long is each meeting, though? I don't know, but also, like, you know, the janitor clearly isn't cleaning anything. Well, not on Tuesdays, we learn. We also learn he doesn't clean anything on Tuesdays. The brain trust does. Yes, he makes the brain trust clean. Now, Ted is the lawyer for the hospital.

Todd is the top surgeon at the hospital. Yes. Doug is the... The mortician? Yes. That's not what you call it. What do you call it when you're a morgue doctor? It's not mortician? Yes. That's not what you call it. What do you call it when you're a morgue doctor? It's not mortician.

Joe, will you look that up for us? We fake doctors don't know that word. There's a term for it. But anyway, he's so fucked up, he brings a brain to the brain trust meeting. But that's such a great idea. As a mascot? As a mascot, he brings a brain in a jar yeah yeah but i don't think it's a very responsible of him as a as a doctor no but it's not responsible for them

to have tried daily meetings either that's true i don't think anybody no matter what your job is should have tried daily meetings uh i don't think that's right yes jo, Joelle. Coroner. Oh, he's a coroner. Coroner? No, coroner is related to crime. I've seen a pathologist. Pathologist. That's the term I was looking for. Forensic pathologist? Medical examiner. A pathologist is what he is.

Okay. I don't know. If you're out there and you work in a hospital and you work in a morgue. You can yell the right answer at your phone or your device. I'm pretty sure it's a pathologist because a coroner, I think, is crime related. Oh, there's also a diner. A diner. D-I-E-N-E-R.

A diner is a morgue worker responsible for handling, moving, and cleaning the corpse. No, but that's at the morgue when you're getting ready for a funeral. I think when it comes into the hospital, it's a pathologist. Pathologist probably. Isn't it a morgue in the hospital, though? Yes, but I don't think, if I'm not mistaken, you can be a mortician and not a doctor, right? Yeah. Pathologists perform the autopsies to determine the cause of death.

So that's probably what we're talking about here. There's so many doctors and nurses screaming at their devices right now. I think Doug is a pathologist. Yes, well, I'm the one who decided that, so thank you. There's an issue with Plomox. It wasn't official until I said it. Oh, okay.

You made it official. I'm going to just say, you decided it, but I made it official. I got it. Thank you for that. Hey, Danil. No, not Danil. Well, Danil.

You can listen too, but I meant Donald. There's an issue with Plomox. Now, Plomox we established way many seasons ago with Heather Locklear. Heather Locklear, yes. Which is a commentary on how these drugs are pushed to doctors by their sales reps. And now we've learned this many years later that Plomox could be killing people who take it if they have diabetes. years later that plomox could be killing people who take it if they have diabetes they ask uh call kelso to see if he'll help with this new issue and he starts cackling

he's like that ain't my problem anymore i don't work there right i'm over it now elliot becomes obsessed with if um if she is is guilty of of me, responsible for losing a patient because of this new Plomox problem, and she's going to go seek him out. And that is sort of the main storyline for JD and Elliot, that he's going to go with her and help find a patient that she's concerned she may have caused harm to. She wants to make sure he's alive. Meanwhile. concerned she may have caused harm to. She wants to make sure he's alive. Meanwhile, yeah, and we think it's for certain reasons, and it turns out to be for another. Yes, and Turk's storyline really focuses around Carla wants another baby.

Yes, and I don't understand what Turk's, I know Turk is like like, yo dude, I don't know if we can afford, or even if we can't afford, you know, the way that you jumped into it, isn't necessarily, you know, you're just springing it on me, and I have to agree with it,

like, but Turk, get over it dude, that's sex, that's so much sex man, and that, you know, Turk is based off of Donald Faison,

and I don't mean to speak to myself in faze on and i don't mean to speak to myself in the third person i don't mean to speak to myself in a third person but if it were me right i would shut the up and start right well at the end of the episode turk pulls a full donald phase on and acquiesces when he learns that he can have sex anytime he wants for a month he can tap her shoulder yes and she got to give it up yeah so that was very donald faze on ask of turk that sounds like the best deal ever and after yeah but all right but now like you don't want another kid now do you but i got the shit i got the shit snipped oh well so so no but i'm saying in the spirit for those people who can relate,

you finally get the baby handled. He or she is sleeping through the night. They got rid of their nanny, who they realized was stealing Turk's rice puddings. They've got it dialed. And I'm sure so many parents can relate. You finally got it dialed. And she's like i want another baby i want to talk to i'm gonna bring casey up in here because this is very similar

to what happened with us so daniel play that motherfucking music and that's what it is I don't know none by raising these fools. So tell me what to do. I don't know none by raising these kids. And that's what it is. Okay, so we're talking about how. Tom Cruise. No, we're not talking about Tom Cruise. We should be talking about Tom Cruise. I'm going to say something right now.

Go ahead. I love how Casey really wanted. The only thing she wanted to talk about was Tom Cruise. Tom Cruise. I'm going to digress, but I'm going to say something right now. The fact that he didn't get nominated for Best Actor is a freaking, it's blasphemy for everyone out there who is like, but it's, look, let's put it this way.

He saved cinema. He brought everybody back to the movie theaters. My ass wasn't going to a movie theater, but I went for Top Gun. Right. Right. Not only is it a great movie, he carries it. He carries the biggest movie of the year. The biggest movie of the year, he carries it.

And he saved cinema and brought everybody back to the movie theaters. If that's not enough to at least get a nomination, you can't add one more or at least a lifetime achievement. Like y'all got to give him something, man, because this is some bullshit now, man. And I never thought I'd ever jump up and stand on a Tom Cruise soapbox in my life. Me neither. Me neither. This is passionate.

But you got to keep it 100, man. That dude saved movie theaters. You know what i mean the the few that are still left everybody went and sat in to see that movie more than thor more than black panther more than all these marvel movies and everything more than the more than the what's been rocking the box office for the last 10 15. He stepped in and did something. He did a military movie. And people went and saw that shit during the pandemic.

Come on, bro. You're killing me. Hold on. OK, so, babe, what we're talking about. And we're back. So what we're talking about is we're talking about, remember when we were pregnant? Try and share your phone.

Remember when we had just had Rock on? He was so cute. And he was in the bed and everything like that. And he was lying down. And you were like, I want to have another one. I mean. And then what changed our minds in the middle of. Well.

What he's talking about, just so you get what's happening in the episode, is they've just finally got the baby dialed in, the baby sleeping through the night. And they're popping champagne because they're like yeah it's a whole new chapter and then turk is so happy that they finally got it dialed and then carla says to him i want another baby and donald said i gotta bring casey down here yeah because you honestly you think oh my god this is so awesome this is so easy we made it through we're there and then so we start fucking and trying to get pregnant and you fucking around you're gonna find out that's what that's because i'm like let's do it why wouldn't we have five this is so awesome it's not near as hard as we thought it would be

he's sleeping 12 hours he's this he's that so then we we were doing it for like a month not really focused on it but just casually like not being safe right no we were focused so wait hold on he was focused i wasn't like taking i wasn't like let's put it this way i wasn't trying to put the baby in her yet i was still trying to have foreplay for a couple of months yeah right you were trying to but you were trying to um draw it out because you've been giving permission for lots of sex. Yeah, you were worried, like, what if I get her pregnant too quick? Then I'm not going to get my month of fun. Right.

Yeah. So I'm going to be honest. This fucker started walking at 10 months. And we were like, whoa. This fucker, she means Rocco. She means Rocco. By this fucker, she means her son. She means our son when she says this fucker she means Rocco she means Rocco she means her son she means our son when she says

this fucker and for anybody nobody obviously listening knows my son but Rocco was born with the most insane amount of energy of any child I've ever seen till this day and when he started walking I was like oh fuck that I don't want another kid right now and then I was like, oh, fuck that. I don't want another kid right now. And then I was like, oh, fuck, I'm pregnant. It took so long to get pregnant the first time that you don't think, oh, in four weeks, I'm going to be pregnant. That was the best part. She said, I want to get pregnant. And then we started having sex. And all right.

So part of it's sad because it wasn't working at first. But the other part was, is that she was resilient and was like, well, it it didn't work that time let's get back up in there and do it some more if he if he could get me pregnant now he would yeah wait i don't mean it like that if we could have sex right now yes i would yes pretend to impregnate me every day he would yes yeah he does he does pretend to impregnate me every day he would. Yes. He does. You guys are so cute. Okay, that's enough. Take the headphones. Bye, Casey.

Bye, Casey. Listen, couple goals, guys, right? Couple goals. So cute. They're so cute. They're so in love. We're making it through, yo. This is really difficult. Moving into a new place with your spouse is really hard yeah they say moving is one of the most uh stressful things for people that and public speaking are two of the things that hold on she wants to talk some more hold on i've now sparked another yeah you create a monster oh no i have to tell you this

because i'm gonna put this fucker on blast. Oh, here we go. I got new floors for this house. This is all I've wanted for 10 years. Shout out. This is my Christmas, birthday, anniversary, Valentine every day for the next 10 years, okay? No, it's not. Anyway, I get these floors. This fucker also, I packed

and I packed the entire family. Donald packed his animation. I go, me and I'm the seventh mover. Me and six guys move our entire house. While I'm working, though. While Donald's working in his defense. But I'm also doing manual labor with these guys. Right.

You know, they even made me go get coffee at one point because they were like you're in our way so i'm stressed out i'm just you did the hand gesture you know it's a problem when she does even the hands go like this so anyway anyway we this this man we get in here we get into the house and he's trying to test the key. This is after he's been at work for two days getting, you know, glamorized and all this shit. Right. He wants to test the keys. I walk off to go in the backyard to deal with the kids. And here comes my kid. Rocco's like, Dad needs you.

He needs you. And I come back and I'm like, what's wrong? And I open the door. He's like, I said I was checking the keys. Why would you walk away? I'm locked out of the house and i was like oh my god we're all here like it's not that big of a deal and he had just and i'll be honest he hadn't smoked all day oh he was grumpy he didn't have his medicine he laid into me and i'm like you haven't done shit what the fuck and i'm going off on him like are you kidding me because you couldn't hold you couldn't get in the house

walk to the driveway like the garage is open and he's yelling at me so then he's like i'm badass i'm gonna go upstairs in his mind he's like i'm gonna start moving shit he goes upstairs and starts throwing boxes and moving shit and scratches. No. Oh, no. My floor. I swear it was like, I was like a meth head that just dropped the last fix. No. I fell on the ground crying.

I was like, my floor, why would you do this? You haven't lifted a thing in fucking two weeks and you're going to do this and like my floor why would you do this you haven't you haven't lifted a thing in fucking two weeks and you're gonna do this and scratch my floor he's like this is the other thing because he just came off a job i will in his defense he's never been like this so i don't want people to think he's that guy he's never been like this he's like i paid for this shit i'll scratch i'll scratch this shit if i want this and my kids are standing there i was like you don't do shit this is this is the first time ever our kids have never seen us have an argument your kids have never seen you fight the whole time you've been together because we. The only thing we fight about

really is sex. That's a whole other episode. Anyway. So then you guys fucked on the floor. No. My kids start crying. They're like, what's happening? Don't yell. This new house is cursed.

Wilder's hitting Donald. She goes, don't talk to my mom like that. He's like, this is my house. I'll pay for this. So I was like, I quit. I'm out. And I went and packed a bag, fucking threw it in the car. This is what moving does.

Oh, my God. Shit got dramatic. My kids are bawling. They're like, don't leave us. Where were you going with your bag? Well, I got in my car and I was like, I'm going to a hotel and I get all the massages I can get. And I drove around. I drove around.

And then my kids start FaceTiming me. They're like, don't leave us. So then I drove around and I almost went to a bar because I was like, I need a drink. And then I almost like, whatever. I just was so pissed. I was like, I need to get away. Told the kids. I was like, this is a grown up thing.

We love you. I just need some space because I don't want to use my body. I want to use my words and I need to come up with my words because all I want to do is use my body right now. So I drove around and then I finally came home and had to stay upstairs because I refused to come downstairs because we weren't talking. So he and I'd been crazy craving pizza for two weeks. This fucker ordered all this pizza and was like, come on, kids, let's eat. I just sit up in my room. how did you finally how did you finally make up what happened oh i apologize the next morning i came downstairs he was like sorry i

scratched your floor i was like sorry i didn't help you get in the house oh oh see my kids my kids are like we fucked we had dapsack oh my god okay bye bye bye wow what a story legendary I have so many I have so many questions this is what happens though man

when you move into a new house it's funny because before she came back I was going like couple goals you guys are so you guys have it so dialed

I know I know and then she told a story about packing up and leaving and the kids are crying in the driveway yeah I know I know man but that's And then she told a story about packing up and leaving and the kids are crying in the driveway. Yeah, I know.

I know, man. But that's what this does, man. It takes you to another level and you wind up saying things that you didn't think you'd say. You know, and parenting and familying is hard, man. I don't give a fuck what anybody says. It's hard enough to take care of yourself. Imagine having to take care of other people and feeling the pressure and the responsibility of having to do that shit you know i'm so i am one of the luckiest people on the planet that my

wife doesn't take shit personally you know what i mean like or personal you know when it comes from me and she understands that i'm venting and that i'm and and and that maybe i'm tired or whatever it is well the good news is that you can apologize and make up and that's the important part and take responsibility and not just and that was smart of you. It sounds like you both kind of hit a breaking point

and had to have it out and then it sounds like you had some nice makeup sex and you apologized and it was all good. On that note, everybody, let's take a quick break and we will come back and actually talk about the TV show Scrubs. I used to have so many men. How this beguiling woman in her 50s. She looked like a million bucks.

With zero qualifications. She had a Harvard plaque. Tricks her way past a wall of lawyers and agents. She's got all of these Maseratis and Bentleys all in the driveway. Is it like a mansion? Yes, it's a mansion. That this queen of the con uses to scam

some of the biggest names in professional sports out of untold fortunes. About six million. Approximately eleven million dollars. Nearly ten million dollars was all gone employing whatever means necessary to bleed her victims dry she would probably have sex with one of her clients hide your money in your old rich man because she is on the prowl listen to queen of the con

season five the athlete whisperer on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. If you've been following the news, you know that from health care access to safe schools, LGBTQ plus rights are under attack. And it's about time queer and trans youth get the microphone and tell their stories in their own words. I'm Raquel Willis. Join me on my new podcast, Queer Chronicles, a show where LGBTQ plus folks tell their own stories in their own words.

This season, teens will share all about growing up in political battleground states. I wish I could feel more comfortable in my own body here, but that's just not the case. And follow along as they discover what queer and trans liberation means to them. This isn't running away from yourself. It's running into who you want to grow into. from yourself. It's running into who you want to grow into. Listen to Queer Chronicles on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your most fabulous shows. As important as choosing the right destination when traveling is choosing the right travel partner. Much of the joy you will find on the road comes from the person you share it with. But be careful and choose your travel partner well, because the worst trips result when two

partners have two different agendas. Get down! I'm not stupid, Gene. Something is going on in its high time you tell me the truth. Freeze, Americano! Gene, run! So travel before it's too late. Your money will return, your time won't, and we're all too quickly approaching that final destination.

Listen to Fodor's Guide to Espionage on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Everybody likes a little ass play, dude. And we're back. Everybody likes a little ass play, dude. They do. Now, Donald, talking about scrubs, okay, let's talk about... Speaking of ass play, Donald. Speaking of ass play, Donald. Alright, so we're in Walmart, and

we're talking about all the different prosthetic testicles Turk can get. One says, I'm stupid, and has an arrow pointing to the real testicle. And then we go into the very rare fantasy within a fantasy and

Turk has selected a testicle that also has a hand warmer in it and we're on an ice fishing trip with Dr. Cox and Todd and somehow all four of us fell through the ice is that what happened?

because they're wet I think the implication was that all four of us fell through the ice? Is that what happened? It looks like. Because they're wet. They're wet. I think the implication was that all four of us fell through the ice, but your ball testicle warmer has magically dried you. Yes. And we're shivering in the cold. And Cox notices and says, is it Cox or the Todd? But they noticed that. Yeah, it notices. Well, why aren't you cold?

Why aren't you shivering? Yeah. And Turk says, all right, fine. Come on, guys. Yeah. And then there's a smash cut. Yes. To probably one of the best shots I've ever seen in school history.

I think we should post it to advertise this episode. I think I might. It's the most homoerotic thing that's probably ever been on NBC. Yeah. Well, there's three naked men gathered around. Will and Grace was on NBC, so I don't know. Did Will and Grace ever have three shirtless men gathered around another man's naked balls? Not that I can recall.

No. Not that I can remember. No. No. not that i can remember no no i sent the picture audience to the group and said can you believe this was on nbc it's very funny but anyway we're all gathered and donald excuse me turk says careful y'all that bad boy runs hot yes and then i say you're telling me, and I turn, and I've got a ball burn mark on my cheek. This is how familiar J.D. feels with turn. I rested that nut on my face. Yes, because it's your best friend and you're allowed.

And I was cold. I was that cold. Oh, my God. I was that cold. And then we also, then we cut to the end of the cold open where Todd comes into the hospital's waiting room and says, best trip ever ice fishing five. And he's got ball burns all over his face, body and hand from, from clutching and cuddling Turk's ball.

Warm, warm. What the hell happened in that ice fishing tent? I feel like it was a broke back mountain trip yeah i think i implied shit went down because listen um we've seen brokeback mountain we know what can happen in a tent and um i think you took your balls out and we were cold and everybody everybody and you know And you know what? Everybody likes a little ass plate. No doubt. Everybody got a little warm.

All right. That's the end of the cold open, which is just a cold open. It's pretty epic. OK. So Ted, we just learned how to open up his briefcase. Right. And it's taken years for him to do it also. Yes.

And he says to Dr. Cox, I'm now your number two. So anything you need, I got you. And Cox says, okay, that's great. Can you do me a favor and file this and go get me a coffee? Right. And Ted, in that moment, tries to open his briefcase again. And he's forgotten how now and he's forgotten how he's like i just had it so there you go in all the seasons of scrubs you've watched up to now

that briefcase he just holds to look like a lawyer he does not know how to open it he's never put anything inside or taken anything out now the janitor decides to give him a pep talk and says you know and he reminds him about his first day of work and we flash back to young ted meeting cox for the first time he has hair he's in a very dapper 70s outfit and kelso says would you mind doing me one tiny little favor and he goes. And we cut to him. And the favor is that he cleans Kelso's car with a toothbrush to get the dead cat guts off of it that he hit. And that's how their relationship began. Yes. And Kelso reveals that he says the cat was a fast little guy.

He had to cross over two lanes of the highway to get him. It was to reveal how evil Kelso is. He shot a cat and was like, so it wasn't the cat jumped out in front of him. No, he went for him. He crossed two lanes. Oh, look at the cat. Yeah, that's Kelso. Wow.

So anyway, the point is that the janitor is giving Ted a pep talk. You have the chance to start anew. Be a confident man. Put your shoulders back. You're not going to be a gopher anymore. And so Ted goes back to Dr. Cox and says, you know, my job is not to get you coffee. I am not going to do that. I am not your gopher.

Yes. And Cox says, okay, fine fine you don't have to do that that's fair enough what's up that's what's up and ted celebrates like he's just won the lottery yeah he's never he's like he's never been so happy in his whole life he can't believe it he's having like an orgasm. He's never won before. He's never had a win this big before. Yes. The ability to stop getting his boss coffee for years and years and years has ended. And he has so much confidence that the janitor says, why don't you ask a girl out? And we see the beautiful Shalina, who is Sarah's stand-in, plays a nurse. And he comes up to her and he says, okay, go on, go ask her out.

And he goes, Cindy, I want to make you pregnant. And he's like, okay. And she runs off, of course. And he's like, okay, well, let's walk before we run, in so many words. But he's created a monster because Ted has found himself. Not only has Ted found himself, but Ted realizes, listen, I have a voice and it needs to be heard. Right. And he really, really wants to play cards on Tuesday nights.

He informs the brain trust that that's what he wants to do. Yes. And the janitor is like, no, you're not a decider. You don't decide what happens with the brain trust activities. I'm the decider in this situation. Right. The janitor says that it's not a democracy. It's a dictatorship disguised as a democracy and that he, the janitor, is in charge.

But it's too late because he's created a monster. And Ted is so mad that he splits up into the brain bunch. He splits off the brain trust. Yeah, he splits the brain trust in half and forms his own group called the brain bunch. Right. And that shit was hilarious. Why is Todd, when he's flexing, making that noise?

He's making like a what is that noise when when people do that to breasts motorboat motorboat why is he making a water motorboating noise when he's flexing he's really excited to be a part of the brain trust and doug is really excited to be a part of the brain bunch that shit was hilarious oh wow the brain bunch and then Todd goes over to the janitor. Brain trust, I'm staying. And then he makes some muscles. And the janitor goes, yeah.

He goes, hey, do you think we could switch? Because I'd rather have Doug instead. And then they switch, and Todd's still excited about being in the brain, but he's just as excited. So he makes the motorboat sound again. Yeah, and then he flexes again. Brain bunch. It just makes no sense.

I understand why he was motorboating while flexing. It's the Todd. He's hilarious, though. Yeah. I mean, this was his episode. He had so many great moments in it. So then we cut to... We can go back, though, when he's like... He's like... when he calls the,

he called the brain trust meeting into order. And Todd goes, I'd like to make a, may I make a motion? He goes, if you mean by standing up and pumping the air, if that was making, making some sexual gesture, then no.

Then no. And he goes, I'd like to strike that then. And he goes, withdrawn. Withdrawn, yeah, withdrawn. That's funny. All right, so JD and Elliot are on this very, this kind of went nowhere. I thought when the lights changed that y'all were gonna kiss man when it got all sunny i know before you get to that yes of course the uh john

inwood has such a tell with his cinematography that when it gets when it gets all warm lighting and uh and and the lens is like has filters soft filters in front of it it's like oh it's gonna be a romantic scene. Because they're clearly – They don't have to fake out. Well, they're clearly beginning – we'll get there. But they're clearly starting it back up again. But anyway, this whole JD and Elliot at the fast food chain thing, I didn't think was – I thought it was sort of random.

But the point is that he wishes Turk was there because he and Turk would have some adventure and goof around somehow. And she's like, that's so rude. Why are you wishing somebody else was some some Adventure and goof around somehow and she's like that's so rude why are you wishing somebody else was here I can goof around they put up a sign that requires people to yell at the at the drive-in which causes the man to be pulled into a car and driven off the cops come I didn't think it was all that funny um and you didn't go to jail for any of it either. It didn't make much sense. I think they just needed a reason

for... Although that is the funniest jackass, and this could be because of jackass being out at the time when they kidnapped Brad Pitt in front of Pink's hot dog, and the people are like, no, they called the cops. The people called the cops and they're like, no, listen, no, yes,'m at pink's brad pitt has just been kidnapped i was there that was a that was

a jackass thing they did that was a jackass thing so i think maybe in some way they were trying to i don't know i don't know what was this if you analyze what was the story beat point, it was that Jade, that JD and Elliot are kind of starting to hang out again and flirting a little bit, but she's jealous that he'd rather hang out with Turk, I guess is what the beat is. Yeah. I mean, or that she wants to hang out with him and do,

she wants to, she wants to take their relationship to a different level now is really what the beat is. The beat is, I can do all of those things that you do with Turk. If you want to hang out with somebody, you should hang out with me. It's not that she's, it's not that she's jealous. She's pretty much putting herself out there. And JD, I don't know, man, when the light, when the, when the shit changed, I thought, oh, JD knows that she's putting herself out there. But then he didn't do nothing about it at the end.

I was like, I don't understand this shit. But then we'll get to the ending, but it's clear that dun-dun-dun, they're going to fucking start hooking up again. All right, so they do this legal custodian's spoof of a sitcom, which with... What is it? I'm a lawyer.

I'm a janitoritor together we adopted a kid we're legal custodians get it get it we're legal custodians now the funniest thing funnier than the sitcom uh spoof was that that we call it back with that chiron on the graphic on the bottom of the screen now nbc i don't know if nbc still does this i don't really watch nbc anymore but um well you will be this fall or this fall when the show that i'm doing with mike o'malley the lovely lovely abigail spencer and john cryer the handsome john cryer comes out yeah what's it called we don't have a name yet okay well i'll definitely be watching it. But NBC, at the time, was doing this thing where they would put giant graphic ads, like

a football game kind of shit, at the bottom of your show that you worked so hard on, promoting the next show that was coming up. And you'd be like, you know, we worked so hard on this. Can you not put your ads like over the fucking show? Didn't sometimes the ads have sound too and would take away from, I don't know. They don't have sound, but they were so distracting. And I remember just being like, I mean. Didn't it start off with a boom, boom, boom?

And then it would. I don't know if during the shows there was sound, but I remember they were big. So anyway, this was Bill making fun of that by having, calling back the joke and having the graphic come that big across the screen, which I thought was funny. And then, by the way, when you cut back to baby Sam, who's so adorable, sitting on the cafeteria table, you can see that he's looking at the boom mic. Because this happens a lot with children. You know, you'll see it a lot in movies now that i pointed out but you have a baby particularly or a small child they're often looking up because what's dangling right above their head is the boom mic and a kid has

no idea why that's there it just looks like something to play with or touch so the crazy the crazy thing is that kids have mobiles when they're growing up. Right. And that's made for them to reach at and be curious about and stuff like that. So you throw a boom mic at a kid. Look, just because they're on TV and are professional actors and shit don't mean that they're not children, that they're not babies. I know. So they see the boom mic and they're like, a mobile. I know. So now you audience members will notice that.

How many times you see babies and little kids looking straight up because they're looking at the boom mic that's dangling over their head. In fact, in my new movie, A Good Person, coming out March 24th. Can't wait. Please go see it. You can watch the trailer on YouTube. We had this adorable toddler, and he was very talkative in the scene with Florence. And I was just kind of getting him to chat with Florence. And he was just shooting the whole thing because it was so natural and real.

And he was just kind of staying. He didn't know he was in character. He was just talking to Florence. And I was planning on using a lot of it because it was just perfect. And then all of a sudden, he looks up at the boom mic. And he goes, what are you guys doing up there? Oh, no. Cutie. What are you guys up to up there that's sweet and it was so sweet and cute um but you were like i can't make the movie no i didn't

use that obviously but i used other things with him just naturally talking to her not not barely knowing i don't even know if he knew he was in a movie he was just chatting with florence it was awesome that's wonderful okay When they do this announcement gag, so the, this is so broad, but Cox as the, as the new chief has doesn't want his office is now the, the, the doctor's lounge. So he's moved the guy who does hospital announcements into that room. It's almost like a, like an airplane, Zucker brothers joke. Um, and then when he's doing his announcements where he's like um jordan you look nice today and they cut to that uh carla with a patient that patient that carla's with is a buddy who was uh

that is buddy i was wondering yeah he was an older guy who was our generator operator um for the show and so he had i just wanted to point out he had a cameo there. Also, in the background, I didn't know if you saw this, but the guy that won the auction to be a background performer in Scrubs is in the scene where the janitor's bigging up Ted. I don't know if you noticed in the background. He's there as a doctor. When he's digging up Ted, what do you mean? Bigging up. Bigging don't know if you noticed in the background, he's there as a doctor. When he's digging up Ted, what do you mean? Bigging up, bigging.

What does that mean, bigging up? When you gas somebody, when you get somebody ready for a big... Oh, that's called bigging them up? So when you're like, yo, I got this audition. I don't know what I'm going to do. And I'm like, go for yours! Oh, then you're bigging me up. I'm trying to get you ready. Oh, I always big you up on FaceTime and on the phone. No doubt.

You got this. You got this. That's how we do it. You got to be supportive. When you're showing support. When I send you a gift that is inspiring. You don't be sending me inspiring gifts. You be be sending me gifts to make me laugh, man. Yeah, I do. You only respond to some of them though. You guys have that friend out there that you send funny gifts to and they only respond to some of them.

That's the worst. So I saw a mic cord in my orange sweater. Did you see the mic cord? I did see the mic cord. When I walk into camera too, that's even crazier. So, you know, we all have these hidden mics. In fact, Joe Foglia, our genius sound mixer for all seasons of Scrubs. He fucked up on this one though, Joe.

He did fuck up. Well, you know why he fucked up? Tanya, you fucked up too? Joe figured out early on that the stethoscopes we wear around our neck would often hit where the hidden mic is underneath our scrubs. So he built the microphones into the stethoscopes. Oh. Genius. Yeah.

Genius. Very cool. It's very smart and very clever. And that way they didn't hit each other. And then obviously if you had a scene where your stethoscope needed to come off for some reason, he would switch to a normal mic. But, you know, every movie you see, especially nowadays, people have wireless mics hidden on their clothing. And the mic needs to go, the wire needs to go in a clever way.

Usually they kind of take it around your pectoralis major or your breast. So it's hidden. But definitely there's a zoom into Donald's orange shirt and you can definitely see a mic wire. For those of you who love fuck ups. This is the one but I will say this we probably had the most awesome Joe's gone on to work with Bill on so many

other things Joe, Kevin, Tanya all of them have gone on to work with Bill on so many other things both Joe and Kevin who was our boomer were on Bill's new show with Vince Va and kevin who was our boomer um were on the bill's new show with vince vaughn um that i was um that i in which i acted um and down in um in florida um it's pretty there was this meta moment where jd when cox is like what are you doing and jd says i'm just doing this thing where i use a slice of wisdom from someone else's life to solve a problem in my own life. And he goes, I do it almost every week.

That was cute. I thought that was a, it's also a great message. You know what I mean? You get, you get inspiration from so many places. Why not look at some of the things that you see out there and apply it to yourself? Exactly. We all really do do that. Maybe not in voiceover for millions and millions of people, but. all really do do that maybe not in voiceover for millions and millions of people but and maybe not and and maybe not weekly yeah um hey um so it

ends with this scene with the with the warm lighting and the soft filters that is clearly uh a tell that um there's a little bit of romance brewing again uh-oh because it ends he goes i want to hang out with you and then it cuts to them we're all in the we're all in the coffee shop donald uh excuse me turk taps carla for some sex we know that that's gonna happen and and it ends with this you know camera you know going up and craning up and moving back as JD and Elliot adorably play with the child. And, uh,

it doesn't take much to figure out that something's brewing. You know, this whole episode is about compromise and it's also about fear of what, what your past can do to you too. Like Elliot is so happy that the person that she gave plomox to didn't die because of her you know um and and not to this extent but this is what we all go through in life like you know you pray that your fuck-ups from the past don't come to bite you in the ass in the future right you pray that those things and that you learn and that you learn from them and that you look right saying

that I bought this shit this is my shit to my wife and stuff like that, I promise you, that's going to come back and bite me in the ass. Well, good for you for... Listen, I think the most important... We all say something we regret. The important thing is that when you calm down, you go and take responsibility and apologize.

And in that story with Casey, obviously, it sounds like it went a smidgen far with packing a bag and leaving. And wanting to go to a bar when she said, I wanted to go to a bar. I was like, what? What the fuck are you going to find at a bar? The moral of the story is that when y'all calmed down, that you were able to take responsibility and say, I'm sorry. And I think that's what we all aspire in a relationship when we fuck up, with our friendships, our family, our lovers.

And there's a perfect example with Scrubs where there's a lot of miscommunication. And these people all have the wherewithal to recognize that they're not coming 100% in the relationship and speak up for themselves. Turk's about to come 100% in his relationship. He's about to come 110% up in that. What you trying to get into one day soon? What you trying to do? All right, listen. So we did some chat.

This is the weirdest thing ever. But you know what? I'm going to try it. Listen, I think it's funny. It's very zeitgeisty. I think. Right, Daniel?

And I think it's, this, by the way, this is the penultimate episode of Scrubs season seven. Next week, we will do the Princess Bride episode for you, which is the season finale. And that's going to be a lot of fun. We're going to take a quick break

and we will come back and we will read what the chat GBT robot thought was good Scrubb's material. We'll be right back. I used to have so many men. How this beguiling woman in her 50s. She looked like a million bucks. With zero

qualifications. She had a Harvard plaque. Tricks her way past a wall of lawyers and agents. She's got all of these Maseratis and Bentleys all in the driveway. Is it like a mansion? Yes, it's a mansion. That this queen of the con uses to scam some of the biggest names in professional sports out of untold fortunes. About six million. Approximately $11 million.

Nearly $10 million was all gone. Employing whatever means necessary to bleed her victims dry. She would probably have sex with one of her clients. Hide your money in your old rich man, because she is on the prowl. Listen to Queen of the Con, Season 5, The Athlete Whisperer, on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. If you've been following the news, you know that from healthcare access to safe schools, LGBTQ plus rights are under attack.

And it's about time queer and trans youth get the microphone and tell their stories in their own words. I'm Raquel Willis. Join me on my new podcast, Queer Chronicles, a show where LGBTQ plus folks tell their own stories in their own words. This season, teens will share all about growing up in political battleground states. I wish I could feel more comfortable in my own body here, but that's just not the case. And follow along as they discover what queer and trans liberation means to them. This isn't running away from yourself. It's running into who you want to grow into. Listen to Queer Chronicles on the iHeartRadio app,

Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your most fabulous shows. As important as choosing the right destination when traveling is choosing the right travel partner. Gene! Eugene Fodor! Gene, we'll boot it! Much of the joy you will find on the road comes from the person you share it with. So you write the books, Gene, and the last hour runs the business. I understand now.

If it's a wise man, marry the wiser woman. But be careful and choose your travel partner well, because the worst trips result when two partners have two different agendas. Get down! I'm not stupid, Jean. Something is going on in this high time, you tell me the truth. Freeze, Americano! Jean, run! So travel before it's too late.

Your money will return, your time won't, And we're all too quickly approaching that final destination. Listen to Fodor's Guide to Espionage on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. And we're back! And we're back! And we're back. And we're back. Fuck your sound effects. Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck your sound effects machine.

All right, we're back, everybody. All right, so I asked ChatGPT, I said, write a scene from the TV show Scrubs where JD and Turk talk about guy love. And now we will perform the robot's writing for you. Are you ready, Donald? I believe I am. And I'll read the stage directions when they come up. Okay, Donald?

Uh-huh. Okay, here we go. This is the first scene of Scrubs that's been written since the show was canceled and it was written by a robot. Hey, Turk. What's up? Not much. Just hey turk what's up not much just hanging out what's up with you oh just thinking about the concept of guy love oh you you mean like how we love each other yeah exactly but is it just a friendship or is it something more man it's

definitely something more we're like brothers but better, I know what you mean, but some people might think it's weird, or even gay. JD, we're not gay. We just love each other in a special way. And who cares what other people think? We know how we feel, and that's all that matters.

You're absolutely right, Turk. You're absolutely right. I love you, man. I love you too, JD. High five? High five. And then the stage direction says they high five. Now let's go get some shawarma. Now you're talking. But Turk would say,

now that's what I'm talking about. Well, it got close, and then they exit the room. I mean, come on, thunderous applause. I like that. What I love about it, it's like a more you know campaign. The more you know, guy love isn't gay. Joelle, Daniel, your thoughts on the robots writing? I feel safe.

Everyone keeps saying AI is going to take our jobs, but I feel strongly that probably won't happen. I just think AI is going to go racist. That's all. Well, yeah, I mean, it takes input from the internet. So yes, eventually it will. AI is going to be like, AI is going to be saying some of the hardest shit

that anybody's ever heard. Yeah, well, didn't that happen, Joel? It's happened a few times. It's happened a couple of times now. It became an alt-writer, like, real quick. Yeah, yeah, yeah. They had to shut that down. Oh, my goodness.

Fucking A, dude. All right, wait. All right, so now. Guy Loves Scene 2? Yes, Guy Loves Scene 2, Donald. You ready? Yeah. Tell me when you're ready to perform.

I think I'm ready. Okay. Here are the stage directions. J.D. and Turk are sitting in the doctor's lounge drinking coffee. J.D. is flipping through a magazine while Turk is scrolling through his phone. J.D., dude, check this out. There's an article in here about how men who have close friendships are happier and healthier. Yeah, I've heard that before.

It's called guy love. Guy love? That sounds kind of gay. No way, man! It's just about having a best friend who you can talk to and hang out with. It's not about being gay. But isn't it kind of strange for two straight guys to be that close? JD, you're my best friend.

We tell each other everything. We hang out all the time. And we even have a secret handshake. Is that gay? I guess it's not when you put it that way. It's just that society has this idea that men can't be that close without it being gay. Well, society can suck it. Guy love is just about having a strong bond with another man.

And I'm happy to have that with you, JD. Same here, Turk. Guy love for life. Guy love for life. They fist bump and continue drinking their coffee. Amazing. Amazing. That's fucking art.'m sorry everybody you're being

facetious right now aren't you i think it's fucking insane if that fucking robot wrote that scene and at least had it made sense made some some bit of sense oh god all right now the ego ride oh gosh come on i think the audience is loving this okay i hope you're loving this audience i hope you're loving this let us know let us know if you're loving it and we'll make it a weekly thing if you hate it we won't all right this is the last scene um this is i put into chat gpt uh write a scene where jd and turk uh ride an eagle. An eagle? JD and Turk were sitting in the hospital cafeteria discussing their plans for the weekend. JD.

Dude, I've been wanting to go on that eagle ride at the zoo for ages. Want to come with me? Eagle ride? Are you serious? That sounds like a terrible idea. Oh, come on. It'll be fun.

Plus, it's not every day you get to fly on the back of an eagle. Fine. But if I die, I'm blaming you. They arrived at the zoo and made their way to the eagle ride. J.D. was visibly excited while Turk looked skeptical. They climbed onto the back of the eagle and were lifted into the air. This is amazing. Look at the view. I think I'm going to be sick. J.D. laughed and patted Turk on the air. This is amazing. Look at the view. I think I'm gonna be sick. JD laughed and patted

Turk on the back. Relax, man. Just enjoy the ride. Turk reluctantly looked around and began to enjoy the experience. They soared above the zoo, digging in the sights and feeling of freedom. As the ride came to an end, JD turned to Turk. See, I told you it would be fun. Okay, you were right. That was pretty cool. They walked away from the eagle ride, both with smiles on their faces.

Maybe next time we can ride the lion. No way, man. I'd rather lion and lions. Spectacular. Yo, okay, so first of all- If that ain't art, I don't know what is. First of all,

I'm going to say that AI missed a great opportunity to have Turk and or JD yell out, Eagle! Right, right.

It didn't happen. Also, that shit at the end reminds me of Blazing Saddles. No way, 12's my limit on Snits and droogin'.

All right, I think it's beautiful. All right, so I put into chat GPT to write a rap about J.D. and Turk being best friends in the style of Busta Rhymes. And here's Donald to perform it. J.D. and Turk, the best friends. Their bond will never, ever, ever, ever end. Together, they're like a force to be reckoned with. Y'all better

watch out. This friendship is a bond that's richer than any gold or precious gem. They're always down for each other. No matter the weather, they're a brother. They're like Batman and Robin McCullough. J.D. and Turk the best friends for life. Their friendship is a bond like no other. They're like salt

and pepper. They complete each other. Together, Bizabond like no other. They're like salt and pepper. They complete each other. Together they're stronger like no other. The French and Bizabond, that'll never sever. J.D. and Turk for hell and hell. Bust around slow. Ain't no denying. J.D. and Turk always flying shining. The French and Bizabond, that's

true. That's true. The dynamic duo. What you gonna do? Bust around slow. Ain't no denying. J.D. and Turk always flying and shining. The French duo. What you gonna do? Bust around slow. Ain't no denying. JV and Turk always flying and shining. The French and Bizabron. That's true. They're the dynamic duo.

Nigga, what you gonna do? We should specify that the AI didn't add the N-word, but Donald put a little flair on it. All right, Daniel, you can stitch that together, right? Yes, sir. This is my best version of it. I'm sorry if it doesn't fit. Well, we did it live on the fly. I think Busta Rhymes would be proud of what you and the robot came up with.

Busta Rhymes, I love you. You're one of my favorite rappers of all time. In this world, Busta Rhymes listens to the podcast. Listen, fans, we love you. Thank you all so much for uh for coming and listening uh we'll be back next week with the uh princess bride episode please do check out the trailer for my movie you can find it on youtube it's called a good person uh it stars morgan freeman florence pew and molly shannon and it's coming out uh march 24th so please keep that on your radar and we'll see you next week.

Donald count us out. Five, six, seven, eight. So get around to hear our Get around to hear our Scrubb's Rewatch Show with Zach and Donald Mm-hmm Hi friends, I'm Danielle Robay

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