Fake Doctors, Real Friends with Zach and Donald - Fake Doctors Classic: 121 My Sacrificial Clam with Neil Flynn
Episode Date: January 11, 2022We're hoping in the way back time machine, all the way to season one, to revisit a conversation with the beloved Neil Flynn. Learn more about your ad-choices at https://www.iheartpodcastnetwork.comSe...e omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
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Wow, Donald.
Wow.
That's all I can say is wow.
I know, dude.
And on a day when we have Neil Flynn on, like, I'm all excited.
I've been pounding
energy drinks and here i am i'm ready to go and no donald faze on do you want to tell everyone
why you're so late i made a mistake and tried to download the new apple whatever it is yeah the
software two hours before.
How old is this computer?
It's pretty old.
It's a MacBook Pro, but it's an old computer.
You know, it's an older model of the MacBook Pro.
Right.
So I am now 20 minutes late.
Yeah, very late. We got Neil Flynn.
He's, like, sitting in a holding room.
Yeah, we put him in a holding.
We put him all in a holding cell.
Yeah, we put Neil in a holding cell, and he's in the holding cell. Yeah, we put Neil in a holding cell and he's just
sitting there. He's probably going to walk
out soon. I hope Neil doesn't
walk out. First of all, how's everybody doing?
We were just chatting. We had
a great chat waiting for you.
What were you chatting about? We were
talking about
just our lives and what's happening
and how Joelle has a huge Twitter following
I didn't know about.
Yeah, did this just happen because of the podcast's happening and how Joelle has a huge Twitter following. I didn't know about. Yeah.
Did this just happen because of the podcast?
No.
Well,
Joelle,
what's your handle?
We should,
we should blow it up even more.
Uh,
yeah,
my handle is at Joel Monique on the Twitters and the Instagrams.
Uh,
no,
I was a writer before I came to you guys and I would do a lot of
critiquing of like television shows and movies.
I think my Watchmen reviews are probably what I'm most famous for.
Toronto International Film Festival just retweeted those yesterday.
But yeah, come talk to me about nerdy and political things.
It's good times.
Well, you're a Watchmen fan?
Oh, fuck it.
From the graphic novel era, the TV show really killed it.
I agree.
Did you not like the movie?
The movie was my introduction
and i find that it has some things that are very intriguing and interesting about it but overall
i don't think it holds up to like the quality that is the original graphic novel right the
graphic novel has more and i love the tv show man i thought that was incredible and it's brilliant
they won a peabody this morning and so relevant to today when you see these, when you see what's A, what's happening in the news,
and also like cops with their face masks on.
I can't help but think of Watchmen.
Watchmen. I was like, wow.
And I saw someone wrote an article that was like,
Watchmen was just a few months too early or something like that.
Yeah, they got it right. They got it right.
They predicted it.
Listen, I would love to banter with you and tell you how much I smell because I forgot
to put on deodorant.
And I'm glad that we're on a Zoom call so you guys aren't offended.
But we got Neil Flynn sitting in the other room.
All right.
Well, then hold on one second.
How about this?
Five, six, seven, eight. About a show we made About a bunch of docs and nurses
And a janitor who loved to hate
I said here's our stories
That we all should know
So gather round to hear our
Gather round to hear our
Scrubs Rewatch Show with Zach and Donald
You know, I don't think that you deserve to 5678 when you're this late.
I did it already, so...
I know, but I just want to submit to the Scrubs podcast rulebook that when you're this late, you don't get to 5678.
You're punished.
When did we get a rulebook?
You know, when I was a kid going to camp, I was so nerdy. And this was back in a day
when they would let you do this. But on the school bus to camp, I would sit in the front seat.
And as the bus pulled in for each stop, the bus driver would allow me to operate the mechanism
that opened up the school bus door. And I thought I was the coolest mofo in the world
as the door operator.
Now, wait, this is my point,
was that I got in trouble one day at camp
and the counselors told the bus driver that I had been bad
and I was not allowed to operate the door that day.
And I was crushed.
I sat and pouted.
And I just feel that that should be something
like your punishment.
You don't get to 5, 6, 7, 8 when you've been naughty.
But I already 5, 6, 7, 8.
I know.
Well, I'm just trying to lay down the rules.
Maybe Joelle can start to make like a Bible of sorts of the rules of the show.
Okay.
How old were you when all of this happened?
This was last year.
No, I'm just kidding.
No, I don't know. Day camp. How old were you at day camp? Seven? I don't know. Eight? Shit. Well, I'm just kidding. No, I don't know.
Day camp.
How old were you at day camp?
Seven?
I don't know.
Eight?
Shit.
Well, then, yes.
I can understand.
I was five, six, seven, eight.
No, I'm just kidding.
All right.
Let's bring in Neil Flynn, Dan.
Push the button.
Ladies and gentlemen, give it up for Neil Flynn!
Hi, Neil Flynn.
Hiya, fellas. How's it going? Hi Neil Flynn Hi you fellas
How's it going?
It's going well
Excellent
There he is
Hi Neil, this is Joel and I think you met Dan briefly
Yes, I was teaching him about computers
Things like that
It's so good to see you, man.
It is good to see you.
You too.
Donald's literally in the closet.
Good man.
I am literally in the closet.
It started, Neil, because it was the best place for sound
because it had all his clothes as a sound dampening thing.
And then he realized that he could hide from his family in there.
So he goes there sometimes,
even when we're not recording the podcast,
to escape his children. This is the safest place in my house my kids don't find my clothes amusing
or interesting enough to want to hang out in the closet so i i can't say i ever found my father's
clothes amusing uh what are any are any of your kids big enough to wear your clothes now? No.
No, thank goodness.
Well, yeah.
Well, yeah, I have an 18-year-old with us, but he doesn't necessarily like the clothes I wear. He's more into that Supreme style and stuff like that.
Me, personally, I, you know, I've dumbed down my gear a little bit.
I now am a golf shirt and shorts kind of guy.
And so what you see behind me is a bunch of golf shirts.
And then my shorts are over there.
Neil, that was your probably first and last tour ever of Donald's clothes.
Yeah.
Time well spent.
Yeah.
Well, you know, you asked.
I know.
But I do remember when my father's clothes
became interesting to me and I wanted to wear all of his gear and I would go into my dad's closet
and take his shirts, which were oversized for me, which at the time was really cool.
And he had like a bunch of designer things that I didn't, you know, he had like back in the day
when Jabot was really popular or, you know, shirts like that.
And I remember going in his closet.
Sergio Tichini.
Do you remember those?
No, I remember.
No, I don't.
I was like the sweatsuit.
Okay.
But I remember going in his closet and taking a really expensive shirt and wearing it outside and ripping it and being like, oh, shit, my dad's going to kill me.
My dad's going to kill me.
And having to tell him.
And my dad didn't come home all the time, right?
So my dad would leave in the morning and then come back maybe, you know,
three, four days later.
You know, that's just how my dad rolls.
And I remember having to wait for him to come home to tell him that I ripped one of his really expensive shirts.
And he wasn't too beat up about it, but I remember the fear.
For three days, I had to wait.
And, you know, my mom being like, he's going to kick your ass.
And me being like, oh, God.
And then finally.
How'd you rip the shirt?
Like playing something stupid.
Like we were playing on a jungle gym. And we would play tag where you couldn't touch the ground.
Sure.
And the jungle gym was huge, was big enough for you to jump from, you know, the slide to, you know, one of the houses or wooden houses or something like that or a planter.
You were a kid.
Yeah, I was a kid wearing my dad's oversized expensive shirt and what made you think like you know what i'm gonna rock to the jungle
gym today is dad's expensive shirt i just you know because everybody was wearing jabot you know
what i mean and i thought well if he has a shirt i can go outside and i'll have this really crisp
and it was like and it was fucked up too the fucked up thing was it was like in plastic and it just come from the cleaners and stuff so i kind of knew i kind of knew like you took the
plastic off though right i totally took of course and i i made a mistake it's one of those like i
watch my kids now do the shit where it's like what were you thinking why would why would you even do
something like that and their answer is i don'thuh. And their answer is, I don't know.
And that was my answer, too.
I don't know.
Yep.
Just impulsive.
Impulsive.
My sister, when I went clothes shopping, I remember I was in, like, fourth grade.
And it was the height of, I don't know if you remember, guest jeans.
Yes.
It was, like, the height of guest jeans.
And mostly for women, I think, at the time, I'm guessing, because my sister convinced me and my mom that I should wear guest jeans as well in fourth grade.
And they were very – you could always tell they were guest jeans because they had a triangle on the back jean pocket.
So I thought, okay, I'm not much of a style guy.
I'm more of a sweatpants T-shirt kid, but you know, okay, I'll try this out.
For a full day,
I was bullied by essentially the entire school.
Children of all ages and grades came by to point and laugh at me and my guest jeans.
Because they were considered like girl jeans or?
Girl and expensive.
I think they were,
they were like, I remember them being like 50 bucks or maybe a hundred and expensive. I think they were, they were like,
I remember them being like 50 bucks or maybe a hundred bucks, whatever, whatever they were. I mean, it was like too expensive for a kid to have anyway, but I think probably fourth grader wears
designer clothes. I don't know. I don't know, Neil. I regret it to this day. I, when Donald
started talking about his, his story, I, I, I felt the pain in my heart from literally the,
it's like, it's like, it's like it's like it's like
what's his name on on uh on the simpsons going it was literally that for a full day of school
so then i go home i go home in tears and i tell my mom like i hate these jeans i'm so
everyone made fun of me all day long i fucking hate these jeans and she was like well you know
what we're gonna do zach Those jeans are perfectly fine.
We're going to take my little stitch cutter and we're going to cut the triangle off the pocket.
Well, she did that and they still had the marking of where the triangle was.
Yeah.
Now you have some sort of knockoff guest jeans.
Yeah, exactly.
Black market.
Now it's worse. Exactly, Neil. Now I'm wearing blackoff guest jeans yeah exactly black market now it's worse exactly neil now i'm wearing black market guest jeans well neil thank you for coming on we donald and i started doing this silly
little thing and yeah uh both of us um when we post about it on on instagram and twitter i would
say that like 60 of the comments people are right. Right.
Or when are you having Neil Flynn on?
So you are very beloved by beloved or beloved by either one,
by the people,
either one. It's like divisive and divisive.
All of a sudden divisive became divisive because that's how Barack Obama
pronounced it.
Really?
Yeah.
Now when other people say divisive,
I had never heard it pronounced that way before Obama said it that way. Well, you know, if Obama said it, it had to be? Yeah. Now when other people say divisive, I had never heard it pronounced that way before
Obama said it that way.
Well, you know, if Obama said it, it had to be divisive.
Now I'm switching.
It's a few years late, but I'm changing over.
I'm switching it up.
If he starts wearing
J-Bo shirts, that's what I'm going to do too.
He probably does wear guest jeans
though. He's a stylish guy. I don't know if they're still
in style anymore. I don't know. Yeah, I'm not sure how big guests are.
I don't think – I know somewhere somebody, the CEO of guests is like,
we're still a hit.
We're still a hit.
We're talking about it.
Donald and I are going to get sent guest jeans in the mail because
sometimes when we mention things on here, we get sent in the mail.
I got a care package from Omission.
I have to tell him.
Neil, it's really lame in Hollywood to say, but I don't eat gluten, but I love beer.
And so there's a really good pale ale called Omission, which I mentioned because we were all talking about beer.
They sent me not only a beautiful care package of Omission beer, but an Omission backpack.
I've yet to receive any of this.
When you come to school in that backpack, I'm going to make fun of you.
You've got no mission backpack.
You're going to be like,
Zach,
please tell me you're not wearing a gluten free beer backpack.
I don't really even know what that is.
The gluten.
And,
but I think you can get away with not eating gluten in Hollywood.
Yeah,
you can.
It's just when I,
you know, this podcast is listened all over the world.
Whenever I mention it, I cringe because I know people are like,
oh, what a Hollywood tool, not eating gluten.
You know, I thought that sparkling water was universal.
You go places in like Texas and you'll be like,
can I get some sparkling water?
And they'll be like, we don't have that.
You have to say club soda maybe. I went someplace and they were like we do have club soda yes what's the difference
between club soda and sparkling water does anybody know club soda is carbon and sparkling water is
sodium if i'm if i'm no no neil knows no you're have a cat. Okay. And of course they listen when you say
no. Yeah. But he's in
my... Oh, you were saying no to the cat. I thought
you were heavily
I thought you were very
clearly opining on Donald's
no. No.
And then I was waiting for you to go into
your explanation, but you never did.
No.
Just no.
Don't try to give me that club soda story.
All right, wait, Joelle is letting us know.
Club soda is artificially infused
with carbon and mineral salts.
Similarly, seltzer is artificially carbonated,
but generally does not contain any added minerals.
Sparkling mineral water, on the other hand,
is naturally carbonated from a spring
or well how is something naturally carbonated i don't know dude carbon gets into it i don't know
yeah i guess well that that was a very thorough explanation but i still don't understand it
i feel like you custom cut and pasted that though from from she didn't just freehand type that she
just got it off the web you know speaking of places that don't have things,
we're in some backwoods place touring with a show,
and we stopped at kind of a Dairy Queen type of thing,
but sort of in the middle of a forest for some reason.
And one of the girls with us, she's going to get a cheeseburger.
She says, what kind of cheese do you have?
I think this is somewhere in Michigan.
And the person literally goes, cheese.
It's square, it's orange, and it's flat.
And that person went home and told her family,
you wouldn't believe what this girl asked me today.
What kind of cheese. Kind of cheese.
It's cheese.
So, all right, Neil.
I was going to do it.
Are you going to go into the Neil's thing?
No, you do it.
You do it.
No, no, no.
Go ahead.
I was just going to be like, I was just going to say this.
Neil, you're one of the few people in the history of television.
There's like a handful of people that went from a show that ran for eight years to a show that ran for 11 years.
What did the middle 11, nine to a nine year, 17 years, 17 years straight on television.
Yeah, I know.
And then actually, and then actually, Neil, you went on to another show right away, right?
So you did eight, and that one didn't last, right?
But you did 18 years in a row on TV?
Yeah, yes.
That might be a record.
You've got to be on a very short list.
It has to be.
Maybe so, but whatever the list is, however long it is,
I am the least famous person on it.
That's not true. disagree i disagree um no that's true but it's just you know i was trying for a long time before scrubs came along
and then i finally the door opened you know and i got let into the party and uh luckily enough i
just stayed now tell us neil that's a good segue into because whenever
we have uh the cast members on we try and we've all sort of told our stories of of uh how we got
on the show and bill's told a really funny story about you and which i'll let you tell or your
version of it because he was talking about how you initially read for cox and um and then when
he said you wanted to be the janitor you said said something like, but I'll still have a stethoscope, right?
Yeah, well, Bill tends to embellish his story.
Oh, really? Yeah, we know that.
Over time.
I know. If you've heard a Bill story like at the beginning and then what it's like in two years, it's like the ultimate game of telephone.
It's become something exaggerated.
Yes. And I thought before, what kind of person just takes a story and changes it improves it
possibly a comedy writer
it kind of makes sense but neil what was going on for you before like what were you up to before
scrubs and then how did you come to be on scrubs well i can't just say you had done a bunch of
movies though in chicago and stuff like that oh small parts small nothing of any significance and then how did you come to be on Scrubs? Well, can I just say, you had done a bunch of movies, though,
in Chicago and stuff like that.
Oh, small parts, nothing of any significance.
But the baseball movie that you did,
you were one of the key players in that movie,
Rookie of the Year?
That is correct.
Right, right.
And yeah, the small part in Major League as well.
I was doing baseball movies only.
You know, I went went into not even read but years ago whenever they would have made eight men out i uh somehow got a chance to be one of the baseball
players and i went in and she said so do you play baseball i said yeah she said uh do you really you
know like she pushed me i said well it's not like I could have been a pro, you know. And I saw her face fall.
I go, eh, she lost interest in me.
I'm 25 years old.
If I could have been a pro, I'd be a pro.
And then I see the movie, and there's the baseball players.
They're playing catch.
Yeah.
That's all they do in the movie.
Throwing the ball back and forth.
Oh, we only got pros for this, you know.
Oh, anyway.
So it wasn't in that baseball movie, but I was just doing little parts
of whatever you can get. I was starting to get
a star on things a little bit.
And then
this came up. I actually
feel like I've told this story before. Is it okay
to repeat yourself? Yes, yes.
Our fans might not
know it, and I'm sure they'll love the story
okay i was uh doing guest stars on on things and um whereas the first half of my career i'd been
kind of a straight actor kind of a drama leaning i drifted over into the comedy side and thank
goodness i did because that's where things opened up i had done an episode of drew carrey and
krista miller was on that show. And shortly
afterwards, friends of mine said that they're going out to dinner with Chris Miller and her
new husband, who turns out was Bill Lawrence. And I said, years ago, I met a Bill Lawrence.
We played on the same basketball team out here right before I left and went back to Chicago.
here right before I left and went back to Chicago. And it was the same guy. And so we
went to their house for drinks or whatever. And then within a month or two, he had this show that he had created. And so I got called in and I said, thanks for calling me in. And he said,
I didn't give them your name. They cause the same people that directed Drew Carey, I think, cast Scrubs.
Okay.
Anyways.
So then I read Dr. Cox.
And he said, that was good.
You're not going to get this part.
I already know who I'm going to give it to.
I said, oh, well, that's fair enough.
And he says, but you want to read this?
And he hands me two pages.
And it's the scene with the janitor and JD at the door.
And he goes, good.
You want to do that?
I said, sure.
You know, it's a job is a job.
That's all I've been doing.
It's 500 bucks or whatever it is for the day.
And, um, and then, um,
I think what was significant is between doing the pilot and that's all I was
promised.
The janitor wasn't going to do anything else.
Uh,
Thomas, the janitor wasn't going to do anything else.
Bill came to and saw an improv show that I did,
and he enjoyed it and learned, I don't know,
that I could think on my feet.
And I think this made all the difference that probably the first scene of the next episode
when the show got picked up, we rehearsed it.
He goes, yeah, good. And then if you show got picked up, we rehearsed it. He goes,
yeah,
good.
And then if you think of something else,
just throw it in.
Yeah.
Do it,
do it,
do a take like that.
Or we would goof around in rehearsal.
You would say,
good,
keep that.
Yeah.
Remember?
Yeah.
Yeah.
And so that,
um,
for me,
considering it was a pretty small part that was,
uh,
that made all the difference.
I got to have such latitude.
What was amazing for,
for me watching you was Bill's respect for how understandably for how funny
you were, because, you know, with everyone else he would, you know,
the rule on scrubs was kind of like, okay, you know,
make sure you get it as written. And then if you guys have time, you can,
you can mess around a little bit and, and, and, and, you know, and,
and we all did that. We all would, would come up with stuff, but with Neil,
Bill would just be like, all right, Neil,
you can make something funnier than this. So what do you,
what do you want to say? And invariably Neil would just come out.
And sometimes they were long and like, and, and Bill would put them in,
but they were, I mean, Neil, I, you know,
all my stuff was with you the first season. And I just, I don't think I ever laughed.
All my stuff was with you.
Sorry. That's what I meant to say. I was just, I'd never really worked with anyone like that.
I'd never worked. I mean, I was so blown away by you because I had never, I mean,
it was my first big job, obviously, but even in my other stuff I had done,
I had never worked with someone who could think so quickly on their feet. And we'd just be adding
stuff that was with all due respect to Bill, even funnier than what was written on the page. And Bill said, if it's funnier than what I wrote,
that's fine. People will think I wrote it. So he was fine with that. Um, well, I appreciate
that compliment. And it was a, I think very rare situation that that unfolded the way it did.
And when,
when that show ended and then went on to the middle,
I said,
well,
this is great.
The only,
the only bad part will be if they're sticklers about the script,
because I'm not used to that.
And they were sticklers about the script.
And I had a lot more to say.
Oh man.
That must've been so frustrating for you because I mean,
I just can't, one thing about Bill, we. That must have been so frustrating for you because, I mean, I just can't.
One thing about Bill, we always joke about his ego and how competitive he is,
but he really always, he was very open to people contributing.
That's not to say, you know, he was the editor ultimately,
and he would decide what was in and what wasn't.
And sometimes we thought stuff was hilarious and he wouldn't use it.
But he was very open to everybody collaborating.
And then it's like Neil said, he goes on to another show, and they're like, great, we just want you to say exactly what's written.
And you can't, you know, if I hear that story and I go, what were you thinking?
I mean, you contributed so much to the humor of Scrubs.
I just can't believe it's like not letting a racehorse run.
Well, you know the difference?
If it's a racehorse is running around and someone says,
okay, I can see that you're very fast.
This is a farm.
We need you to pull that plow.
The difference is the tone of the show.
Scrubs, even though it had its nice,
it could turn on a dime and be heartfelt and sincere in that.
Other than that, much of it, it wasn't very grounded.
It was, well, all the fantasies and all that stuff.
I mean, it was very, and then the janitor could have turned out to be a Martian and it wasn't.
Okay, sure, I guess.
I was playing a family man in Indiana.
You can't just say crazy things.
Right.
Right.
Right.
And one of your specialties was just, I remember that Bill told the story about you getting,
one thing you improv that he kept all in about getting into a fight with a chicken.
Do you remember that?
Yeah, it was a duck, I think.
A duck.
A duck.
For some reason, I think, I feel like that was written or partly written or mostly written.
I might have gone off a little bit.
I think the start of it may have been, but as I recall,
as you did so many times hilariously, would just go off with it.
And a lot of times we'd be like, this is hilarious.
I don't know if Bill's going to put this in the show or not,
but on set we're all fucking cracking up.
And then almost invariably you'd see the episode cut together
and it would be in there.
I remember one of my favorite, I mean you and i had some i mean i i'm not just saying this because you're here man i i genuinely think and no offense donald i love you
to death but i thought i genuinely think you you've probably made me laugh harder than anyone
else on earth well wow okay then i i remember i remember an episode and they wound up changing the episode but the storyline
between the two of you was about a piece of fruit and that you had never tried before that that the
janitor had never tried before and and the whole storyline was you finally getting this fruit
at the end of the show
and tasting the fruit
and I don't remember where it went after that
but I just remember you doing a bunch of
really funny things
about fruit and then they changed it
to like a scooter or some shit like that
I don't know what it was
do you remember this?
this reminds me yesterday
because Zach sent me an episode
of this thing to
listen to with John McGinley.
Yeah. And it
came up. What episode wasn't
the janitor in? Yes. Yeah.
Was that the episode? That's it.
It's called My Two Cups. That is it!
Yes! I think I, because there was an outtake
of me wiping out on a scooter.
Yes! Coming in the front door of the
hospital, but that had never aired
because i i was that was the first season and i was edited out of it and that's the only time that
happened that i knew it i knew it i knew it i knew it as the worst memory in the world remembered
something because i thought the i thought the story was so funny the fruit story was so funny
and it was like a peach or a plant and you kept improvising different
fruits when you were telling that story i i have and i still have no memory whatsoever
of a fruit and a plot line about fruit because i wasn't in it so i blocked it out of my
spike uh neil one of my favorite i I have two favorite moments that always come to mind when I think of laughing with you.
The first is in the Wizard of Oz episode when you and I did this whole long riff about seeing a manatee underneath the hospital.
And then you said, I said, is there some sort of underground canal system or something?
I think I saw a manatee.
And you said, was his name Julian?
And then I said, I don't know, we didn't exchange pleasantries.
And you go, that's Julian.
That was good.
I feel like it was the writers, though.
No, no, no.
We made that up? That was all me and you just being silly.
Again,
it was one of those things where we were like,
I don't think this is ever going to be in the show,
but we were just cracking each other up about the,
there's a manatee under the hospital and has a name and you,
you're familiar with his,
his social behavior.
This is what I'm talking about,
about being able to wing it.
Yeah.
I couldn't have thrown that in on the middle.
I was working on it.
Corey, Mike, it was good.
There's a man that lives underground.
I bet I know the other one that you-
Yeah, you do.
Go ahead.
It's this.
It's my wife's-
Toe finger, thumb finger.
If you guys want to watch on the,
on the scrubs gag reel blooper reel that you can find on YouTube,
I forgot what season it is,
but Neil,
the janitor as wife had made me scrubs,
short shorts.
And,
and he's like,
look,
I really want you to wear these to work.
And I'm like,
I I'm like,
I'm,
I'm a,
I'm a doctor.
I can't wear short shorts to work.
All it was was a pair of scrubs cut off really high.
Yeah, so high.
Like my balls would have hung out of them.
And then Neil goes, the good Lord didn't bless my wife with all 10 fingers.
She only has pointer on one hand and thumb pinky on the other.
Meaning that it had been really hard for her to make these short shorts,
and I was disrespecting her if I didn't wear them.
Anyway, I just couldn't make it through.
I could not make it through with Neil going pointer and thumb pinky.
That's, by the way, a wife that probably doesn't exist.
No, yes, she didn't.
She didn't exist because you get married at the end of the series.
That's true. That's true.
That's true.
And Neil, you know, Neil, we've been joking this first season.
It's down the line.
You know, we haven't seen these in 20 years, as I'm sure you haven't.
And, you know, Bill, you know, one of the Bill-isms that he always says is,
you know, I was debating season one if the janitor was just going to be a figment of J.D.'s imagination.
Well, every episode we go through, for the most part, we see little moments where the janitor does just going to be a figment of JD's imagination. Well, every episode we go through, for the most part,
we see little moments where the janitor does interact with other people.
And every time we bring it up to Bill, we're like,
so yeah, you're holding on to that.
But in this episode, the janitor, for example, in this one,
he offers two baseball tickets.
Sorry, Franklin Godbetter, who is one of our assistant directors,
is playing the actor who sees Neil with the two tickets and says,
I'll go.
And Neil's like, not you.
And it's like another example of like, okay,
well then other people see the janitor bill.
I watched that yesterday.
That was a moment that was added to the script that wasn't in there.
Yeah.
The not you part for Franklin.
I think that might be one of the only times.
I mean, you might remember.
No, he dressed up like the bunny.
Remember, Franklin dressed up like a bunny.
No, I'm not saying that Franklin wasn't in the show more.
I'm saying where it's a really funny moment where Neil goes,
what do you want to go to a baseball game
and have popcorn? And then J.D. walks
away like, stop messing with me.
And then he pulls the two tickets out of his shirt.
He's like, that's the last time I reach out.
And I was laughing
out loud going, do you think that's the only time
in Scrubs history that the janitor ever
made a genuine
appeal to J.D. to bury
the hatchet? You know what?
Watching that, I thought, I don't think I played that right
because I said it very sarcastically.
So, of course, you walked away.
You know, what do you want to do?
Go to a baseball game?
I probably should have said, well, would you like to go to a baseball game with me
and we can share popcorn?
I mean, it's something that sounds a little more sincere.
Right. But J.D. had to, you know,
it had to be on the line because J.D. had to be like,
stop fucking with me, roll his eyes, and walk
away. Right. Or maybe the janitor
just has no skill at
offering an invitation.
They all come out very sarcastic.
Very sarcastic, right. Would you like to come to a
party with me?
I guess. Would you marry to come to a party with me? I guess.
Would you marry me, please?
So what was the troupe that you were doing improv with, Neil,
that Bill saw you in the early days?
We were called Beer Shark Mice,
and it was at the I.O. West,
which no longer exists, a theater.
But we must have done it for, as it turns out,
15, 18 years, something like that.
It was crazy.
Wow.
Let me throw out the names real quick.
Pete Holney, Dave Koechner, Pat Finn,
Mike Coleman, Paul Valancourt.
I hope I didn't forget anybody.
When I first moved out here,
removed out here after five years in Chicago,
we had been doing it at a theater in Chicago,
not the same group, but all those individuals with difference.
He's put a group together out here,
went and they opened a branch out here.
We all had virtually nothing to do nobody's career
was rolling and so that's what uh that's what we did all the time that was maybe in 98 99 and what
was that was there a specific game or that you guys would play or or structure of your improv
uh no not really but we didn't do games. That's a different, uh, approach. It was, um,
there's something called a Herald that is a long form where you get out there, take a suggestion,
go for a half hour. Yeah. And, uh, uh, we didn't do that, but it was along those lines. We just
take a suggestion and then the audience is done participating. That's amazing. You just roll for a half hour.
It was a good group, and it's not necessarily dead now,
but it was great fun and a great thing to do,
and I enjoyed doing it.
And then after a while, sometimes I still want to do a show,
and I say, you know, I'm closing in on 60 years old.
I don't think I was 25.
I wasn't interested in seeing 60 year olds entertain me in any way.
Oh, I have no doubt that you would sell out, man. People,
people love seeing you and you were so good at it. I mean,
I remember thinking that when we were doing scrubs, that,
that just cracking up at the stuff you would come up with and going, I,
I would love to go see one of your improv shows. I mean,
we may have gone one.
Was Mike Schwartz involved or no?
No.
Maybe he came with us.
When we were doing Scrubs, were you doing the show too?
Yeah.
Were you doing the improv show?
Yeah.
I feel like I came once.
I feel like I must have come once.
I don't think you did because I didn't feel strongly about this,
but people had heard that this was going on, and it went on for all the years of Scrubs.
And so people would often, I don't know if they're just striking up a conversation or being, you know, they really meant it.
When you do that show, what time, like literally, like for the 50th time, I'm saying to somebody Saturday night,
eight o'clock IO theater.
And as far as I recall,
no one ever came.
So I got tired of being asked,
you know what I mean?
And I didn't even,
I don't need anybody to come,
but the house is full.
Maybe I saw a video or something.
I saw,
yeah,
that's what we did.
We saw a video.
Bill showed us a video.
Maybe that's what it was.
Bill was sort of,
was showing us a video of,
of you. And cause I feel, I have a, I have a, I have a, I have a, I have a somewhere was sort of, was showing us a video of, of you.
And cause I feel,
I have a,
somewhere in my brain.
I remember seeing a piece of it.
Yeah.
And there was you and somebody on stage and it was like,
uh,
where you were,
uh,
uh,
a drill,
not a drill sergeant,
but something like that,
where you were in the army.
And I,
I just remember it a long time.
It was,
it was,
you remember that improv from 20 years ago, right?
Yeah.
That's no one ever, maybe it's possible,
but pretty much you never remember a scene you did.
Someone will say, I saw you guys improvise once.
You were firemen.
And I don't, I have no memory of that.
Shall we get into the show?
So Neil, what we do is we just kind of talk through the episode
and point out things that made us laugh or just any thoughts we have.
But we should probably take a break, right, Joel?
We'll go to break.
Neil, this is a real show.
We have commercials and shit.
I know.
I heard.
I'm very impressed.
Yes.
No joking around when it comes to being real.
Right, Donald?
I mean, no.
This is the real deal.
This is like a real radio show.
Well, I mean, a real podcast show.
A real podcast, yeah.
Yeah, that's how you want to look at it.
All right, tell the people we'll be right back, Donald.
You already did.
Okay, we'll be right back.
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All righty, we're back.
We're back.
We're back with Neil Flynn, everybody.
The people spoke.
They said, Neil Flynn, bring on Neil Flynn. And we got him.
Has everybody else been here?
You are, no, Ken has not been on the show yet.
Ken Jenkins, but we've had the other lead cast members.
Yeah.
We had Judy on, we've had Johnny on, we've had Sarah on, we now have you on, we had Bill on.
We had Krista.
We had Krista on.
Speaking of Ken Jenkins, I am just about, you know, when we started the show, he was the old guy.
Yeah.
Without, you know, no know offense but clearly yeah that's how we thought
of him and you even more than i because you're younger than i am uh i'm almost that age you're
almost the age i'm like months yes i'm months away and i think johnny c's a little older than
me so i think he probably is that age yeah wow i haven't seen that so i haven't seen well the last time
i saw him was when we did the uh the uh reunion thing he looked great and he looked amazing yeah
yeah i want to get him to come on this when we did some we had some sort of group email about
hey do you guys want to do x y or z and and everyone was like sure sure sure you know we
almost all always say yes because it means we get to all get together and have a drink and make each other laugh.
And Ken was like, I'm moving.
I've got a lot going on.
And I was like, my feelings were, I mean, I know it wasn't personal, but I was like, Ken, you know, you can take a couple hours off from moving and come say hi to us.
But no, I got a lot going on.
I got shit to do.
It sounds like work.
I got shit to do.
And it was kind of a Kurt goodbye.
It was like very Kelso.
It was like, oh, but good to hear from you all.
Take care.
I remember that, but I find it interesting that it was an email,
and you've put a voice to it of a grouchy old man.
I have to move.
I have to move.
Nice to see you all.
The funny thing is about like,
people always ask you like what people,
what people,
cast members are like. And I said,
the most different from his character was Ken Jenkins because he was the
sweetest man you ever met in your whole life.
And he was playing this,
you know,
tough jerk.
Yes.
And I noticed that on the episode,
uh,
that it was early on,
obviously the first season and everyone was still a little bit one-dimensional.
I don't want to say that's not exactly true, but Ken was.
I'm like, look how mean Ken is being.
Like in the pilot when he turned into a demon for a minute.
He was still in that mode of, well, guess what, sport?
Nobody cares.
That sort of thing.
By the end, he was like this kindly old doddering man yeah just having a nice
muffin yeah and and also at the bar in the bahamas like you know he i think bill finally like
evil one episode early on here we in season one we showed that back he back in the day used to
write love songs on the guitar to his wife. I think Bill was beginning to plant seeds of him having a softer side.
But you're right.
By the end of the season, by the end of the show, he was a sweetheart.
Or more of a sweetheart.
And Ted was sort of his best friend, wasn't he?
By the end of the show, yeah.
And this one, he calls him Ned.
By the way, all these years that we assume that Ted has been working for him,
he still doesn't know his name.
He calls him Ned.
Yeah, but that went away.
I mean, they became kind of buddies.
I found it very crazy.
I thought it was crazy that Ted has been plotting against Kelso for so long.
He's hired a hitman.
He's hired a, right. He's hired a, right.
He's like, I know a hitman.
Yeah.
You and I, we can do it.
That was a really funny part of this episode where we have that long,
uncomfortable laugh because he mentions that he knows a guy who can end it all.
Yeah.
And then we have that long, uncomfortable laugh.
And then he's like, no, seriously, just one phone call.
One phone call.
So that means that Sam, Ted has found a, he's got a hit man ready to go whenever the time is right.
Right.
Right.
He just needs somebody to, he needs somebody to be like, no, you're right.
We should kill this fucker.
He just needs it.
Yeah.
Someone second the emotion.
It was, I hadn't seen Sam's face since he passed away and it was nice, but, you know, strange to see Sam.
Yeah, man, we've been talking about that on the podcast and how, obviously, it's caused
me to look even closer at his work on the show and just how incredibly funny he was.
We recently just watched an episode where he and Judy, I don't know if you remember
this one, Neil, where he and Judy serenade a patient and sing this beautiful harmony together. And it was so moving. I mean, obviously,
um, because he passed away, but it just, it just really, it just really just drove it home how,
how incredibly, uh, talented a guy he was. Yeah, that was, uh, his character added a nice,
was uh his character added a nice it came in handy you know the the so many shows that um succeed i think build a world of supporting characters and that you can go to or just like
probably number one would be the simpsons they have like a poster and there's 200
recognizable characters in there yeah um of course give me 30 years and maybe I could do that too with a TV show.
They've had a lot of time to add characters.
But Scrubs did a good job of that.
Yeah.
And Bill always called them his assassins.
Those people like Bob Clundenin or Matt Winston or Phil Lewis who played Hooch.
Rob Macchio.
Rob Macchio.
Well, Rob had a bigger part than those guys.
But I mean, just being like, you know, think about Phil Lewis who came on and would do,
I don't know how many episodes he did total.
He's directing now.
Yeah.
Yeah, he's doing very well as a director.
I mean, I don't know if this happens to you, Donald, but I'll be walking down the street
and people will be like, hey, love you on the show.
Hooch is crazy.
And it's like a little slogan about Philil lewis's character and he must have
done like a handful i mean that's the amount of influence sorry that's the amount of impact he
had on on fans because they were just like they loved him so much well remember it started off
as turner and hooch where tom hanks's brother came on as turner and phil lewis played hooch
and they had this whole little adventure that they went on together as Turner
and Hooch in the hospital.
They somehow got paired together.
One of them was a medical doc and one of them was a surgeon
and they would tag team a bunch
of patients, right?
I think it was an elaborate way
for the writers to get a Turner and Hooch joke.
Right, but they got Tom Hanks'
brother to play the
Turner character, just like in the movie, right?
And then somehow it turned into this whole story with Phil coming back as this crazy-ass doctor.
But when it originally happens, the two of them are, you know, he's not crazy or anything like that.
Then it turned into us joking around like, oh, Hooch is crazy.
Hooch is so crazy.
And then by the end of it, it's no, Hooch is crazy.
He is genuinely crazy.
People love that.
But no, no, no, not joking.
Hooch is fucking crazy.
Like dangerous.
Yeah.
And then there was an episode where you put like someone, was it me or you, put bullion cubes in the shower head?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Which one of y'all put bullion cubes in the shower?
And we're sitting there trying not to like.
And he's like, I won't catch you.
Him with the crack lighter that goes like, you know, six feet.
That's a very popular gif I always use.
Hooch with like a six-inch lighter flame.
Yeah.
By the way, I remember a funny thing about the tom hanks's brother who was on the show he did the voice for one of the
toy story things not not the not the movies but like i don't know if it was like a book or
or something yeah something that tom hanks couldn't be bothered to do and he and he had a
similar voice so i so i he would just throw him, I guess, being generous to his brother,
like, here, you do some of this stuff.
And I just remember learning for the first time
that he did some of the non-movie stuff.
That's amazing.
A little trivia for you out there.
Just a little trivia.
Elliot is into some kinky stuff, right?
I mean, I just realized that this is a runner through the series.
The episode opens up with her talking to Scott Foley about wanting to be called a bad girl
and they're going to go shopping or stop by her house for a schoolgirl outfit.
And then I just started thinking about all these times in the series where Elliot's got some kink.
She likes to role play.
Yeah, she likes the dirty stuff.
She like the dirty talk.
I think that's even one of my lines in the show. Oh, she likes the dirty stuff. She like the dirty talk. I think that's even one of my lines in the show.
Oh, she like the dirty talk.
Really?
In this episode?
No, not in this episode, but like later on in the series.
I know I say something like that.
And then later on when she and Foley are making out, she's like, say intercourse.
Like she's got these weird kinks.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
That's, that's, that's
I, I
Yeah, I remember there was one where I was like an
apple thief. I had to be, I was a part
of one of their, I don't know if that was a fantasy
or if it was real, but they had asked me. There was one where
she climbed up on top of me on a
on one of the, on a surgical table.
Yeah, that was a fantasy though. That was a fantasy.
Oh, yeah, of course, yeah. Do you remember if she, she was, she had a surgical table. Yeah, that was a fantasy though, wasn't it? That was a fantasy. Oh, yeah, of course, yeah.
Do you remember if this,
she had a,
a nurse thing on.
Like a Red Cross thing.
Yeah, the Red Cross thing.
And they had to, in post,
they had to change it to green
because, no, you don't use the Red Cross's logo.
That's funny.
That's a little bit of trivia right there.
You can't have sex on a surgical table
with the Red Cross album on it.
We're not going to approve that.
But if you got the green one, which is the medical marijuana one,
it's all good.
It's all good.
It's funny.
The Green Cross in the UK just means pharmacy or normal pharmacy.
And now that we live in California,
for those of you who don't have dispensaries,
wherever you are,
everywhere there's a medical dispensary,
recreational or medical,
it's the Green Cross.
So it's funny,
when I first moved and spent some time in London,
I was like, wow,
they have a lot of dispensaries.
They're on every corner.
I laughed out loud at a Loma Rite.
Hey, let's make this quick.
I got tickets to Bring in the Noise
Bring in the Funk and I don't want to miss the noise
I laughed out loud
Aloma
She had a couple good lines in that episode
Yeah she really does
She really does nail it every time
You're absolutely right about
the cast of characters that came after the core seven.
You know what I mean?
It's like everyone always seemed to nail their jokes.
You know what I mean?
And it's a, I don't know if Bill had a thing where it's like, if you didn't nail the jokes, you didn't come back.
Oh, of course.
That is kind of the thing.
If you're not funny, you're not coming back. I would love to know the people that he had we don't want to we don't want to
out i'm not gonna put on this is conversation to have with him no one's listening right
at another time but i would know but i mean you can know in your head there were there were people
that that could have easily what happened with neil is is the ultimate example neil neil was in
the pilot and Bill was like,
I'm making this guy a series regular.
Whereas there's people who did one or two
and he's like, all right, well, it was nice meeting you.
Yeah.
What about, you skipped something
and I wanted to talk to you about it.
When Judy touches your belly and goes, boink.
And she goes, who's your new friend?
I didn't want to. Oh, you wanted to i didn't i didn't want it that oh you wanted to
skip that i didn't want to skip it but you know i when i when i was watching the show i was like
and this is where my eating habits changed you know what i mean like but do you but i have a
question because i think it's just a story point because when they cut to you later running with
johnny c and you're in the gym you look fit hell. So this didn't come out of the writers being like, ooh, Donald's gained a few, did it?
Listen.
It didn't look like you had.
Listen, back then I was 175 pounds
when we started the show, right?
Right.
I got up to 190 pounds and everybody,
I could feel the, you know,
where my clothes didn't fit the same
and everything like that and season one
this happened yeah around season one you know you get comfortable when you're working and stuff like
that and i remember thinking you know wow i guess i look big on camera now and you know i i remember
dieting and doing all of these things right and at one point i you know i i guess i i gained some weight but
this was this became a issue for me as time went on where i didn't think about weight
up until scrubs like i didn't give a shit about how i looked or how i was perceived i didn't you
know i just i ate what i wanted to and you know i i worked out a shit ton. But then all of a sudden it became, okay, no, you have to work to maintain this weight for the show or it's going to be in the script.
And people are going to.
Wait, so did anyone ever say anything to you?
Like, you need to lose weight?
No, but I once heard.
And I'm going to call Sarah out on this. heard sarah you know while we were filming talking to a bunch of people like yo somebody hit me up on
a chat line and was like yo is donald faze on on the crispy cream diet and i was like yo
and i remember being like yeah i am on a crispy cream diet but who gives a shit dude
why does it's funny because the story of turk in the show is that doctors get so busy they don't
have time to exercise they're stress eating
and it's kind of what happened to you as an actor on the show we had crazy hours there's a
giant craft service table with donuts and uh you know and i love first of all i love donuts let's
let's keep it 100 like is that your favorite thing for my birthday my wife bought me a donut
machine dude you think i'm fucking bullshitting She went on Amazon and got me a commercial-grade donut-making machine, dude.
Is that the one that just, they go down like the little?
Just like a Krispy Kreme.
And I was like, you got that shit?
And she was like, yeah.
I was like, we got to look at the dimensions on how big this thing is.
This shit's like 56 inches.
Like, it's like a six-foot, whatever six feet is, it's like a six foot long track.
And it makes donuts.
It doesn't make like one donut at a time.
It makes like seven, it makes a dozen donuts at a fucking time, dude.
And I'm like, holy shit.
I even said to her, I was like, babe, is there a way that we can return this?
And she was like, yeah, but it has to get here first.
Now I know me.
Once it gets here, I'm going to make donuts on that thing, man.
Wait, this is recently?
It hasn't come yet?
It hasn't come yet.
Oh, my God.
The way it happened was because I'm going through Amazon.
And you know how once you buy something on Amazon, it hits you with, if you like this,
if you since you bought this, you might like this.
And I was like, hold up.
Why are all these donut machines showing up?
Well, that's not going to help your diet, bro, if you have a donut machine in your house.
I've come up with an idea on what I want to do with this – with said donut machine.
What?
I am going to make Donnie's Donuts, okay?
And I'm going to sell donuts to the masses.
I'm going to – I'll sell about, you know, it makes like a dozen donuts at a time.
I'll sell, I don't know, maybe five dozen donuts a day.
Okay, out of your front door.
Not out of the front door.
I'll do it on sets or something like that where I'll, you know, if you have a –
And you're not going to give it to charity.
You're just going to pocket that money, right?
This is your side hustle.
Fuck yeah, man.
I got to pay for that donut machine.
That shit costs a lot of money.
I know my wife bought it for me,
but you know it comes out of my motherfucking pocket now,
don't you?
You know what's funny?
I never realized it until now is like
when you have a joint bank account with your wife
or your partner or whatever,
and they give you like a really expensive present,
is part of you like,
uh, thank you, but what the fuck?
Yeah.
I'm sure my wife thinks that way too.
The first thing she says every time I buy something,
how much did it cost?
Don't worry about it.
Don't worry about it.
Don't you worry about it.
I had the opportunity to see how much the donut machine cost because it was on our Amazon account.
I can't wait to see the commercial donut machine in your house.
When this is all said and done, I invite you all over.
Come over.
I'll make donuts for you.
All right.
Well, I didn't realize it was a sore spot for you.
But anyway, it was written in the script that Turk has gained some pounds.
Well, it turns out that Turk gets diabetes, too, because of his eating habits.
And, you know, part of me thinks, like, yeah.
Is that later?
Yeah, later on, Turk gets diabetes, literally.
The episode, my diabetes.
My diabetes.
But I remember thinking, you know, your real life would somehow wind, like, I don't have diabetes,
but your real life would somehow wind its way up into the script.
You know what I mean?
And I remember I started,
I was losing my hair at a very young age and Bill wrote into the script.
The reason why Turk doesn't grow his hair out is because it's patchy.
And I remember being like,
Oh,
hold on.
I just noticed that you have hair on your head.
I have a shit ton of hair.
You stopped shaving your head.
Not so much in the front.
Not so much on the front, but like on the sides.
He just has a big receding hairline, but it looks good.
Anyway.
I like the way it looks.
Thank you.
You just made me think you could do a mohawk, which would be cool.
It would be like really thin in the front, and then it would get really thick in the back, though,
which is not really the dopest mohawk on the planet.
But anyway, I remember him doing that and being like,
wait, hold on a second.
Bill thinks I can't grow hair?
And I legit, so there's like six episodes where Turk has a full head of hair
just because I was like, there's no way I'm going to let anybody think
that I can't grow no hair.
Like it became personal at some points.
And this was one of those moments with the donut where it was like,
when I was watching,
I was like,
and this,
I think this is where it all went down,
where I started to realize,
Oh,
I have to be in a certain shape for things.
I have to look a certain way because before that I didn't care about it.
And I was still working.
Right.
Well,
don't you feel that way now though?
Still,
when you,
when you get jobs that like when you did, when you were on emergence for a year,
did you feel like that you wanted to be in good shape for the camera?
No, I just wanted to look fresh in the face for camera.
Like, these are things that I've learned.
Like, I've learned that my drinking habits
and my marijuana habits have made it so that, you know,
if I don't take time off from it, you can see it in my face.
You know what I mean?
I look at pictures at us when we were kids and when we would go to the parties
and everything like that and we'd drink at the parties.
And you could literally see in our faces and pictures,
those guys are fucking wasted.
And as I've gotten older, that's lasted much longer than it,
you know what I mean?
If I drink on Tuesday, you know, I got to wait until like Friday
until it's all gone out of my face or I have, you know,
real big bags under my eyes.
And same thing with smoking.
So when I went and did Emergence, I cut out all booze and alcohol
for a long period of time.
I mean booze and marijuana for a long period of time. I don't booze and marijuana for a long period of time.
I don't know what emergence is.
What's emergence?
No one did.
No one did, Neil.
No one watched it, Neil.
It didn't emerge?
It didn't emerge the way I wanted it to.
You know, Neil, both Donald and I, as you know,
because you helped me with some press,
which I really appreciate,
as you know, Donald and I both had ABC shows um and unlike the middle uh they both uh completely bombed yeah they didn't
make it was the middle was the abc show right yeah yeah yeah yeah was it abc studios also
warner brothers warner brothers warner brothers for abc wow yeah we were abc for nbc originally
and nbc was like no we're gonna pass on it and abc was like, no, we're going to pass on it.
And ABC was like, oh, well, we'll pick it up.
And we went a full season.
Are you still sad about it?
How are you feeling about it?
I'm fine.
How long do you pout about something like that?
I have bad news.
I think I pout for a few days, and I'm like, all right, thug it.
Yeah, I didn't pout for like a few days and I'm like alright thug it yeah I didn't pout that long
about this one I loved the show and I loved
the cast members and I loved working with everyone
but it was in
Jersey and not that I have
something wrong with Jersey but
coming out of a pandemic
and going back to work in New Jersey
and leaving my kids
on behalf of the Garden State I think the
point is that you didn't want to be separated from your family it wasn't that was like jersey let me if you if you let me finish
coming out of a pandemic and going back to jersey which i i had a great time in jersey and i love
jersey yes we know you like jersey city and leaving my kids back in los angeles again
it would fuck them up you know what i mean i i understand that i wouldn't uh
i wouldn't want to uh do a show in another state maybe the time will come but i think
i don't know i drive to fox i i agree neil i i i wouldn't i would do a film obviously anywhere
but i wouldn't sign on i don't think think. I mean, I'll mark my words.
I'm sure there'll be an occasion where I might change my mind.
But right now I think to commit long-term to something,
it would be New York or L.A. where I'm based.
And I'm like Donald.
I don't have kids yet.
But I'm still in a place where I don't want to go move to Stade.
Where?
I always choose
Stade as my random city.
I believe it's a ski town in Switzerland.
It's straight out of
trading places
where Dan Aykroyd's at the
pawn shop trying to sell the watch
and the dude's like, 50 bucks. He's like,
50 bucks? No, this is a such and such.
It tells time in New York, London, LA, and Stade.
I think it's like the Aspen of the Alps.
It's like a fancy ski town.
Which, by the way, was a horrible example for my story,
because I should have picked a place no one wants to live.
Maybe I would like to live in the Aspen of the Alps.
We're going to take a quick break.
And then, Neil, we take a guest with the show
who's going to have an awesome question for one of us, I'll bet.
Oh, that's fantastic.
Let's rewatch our Wednesday and I know.
Mm-hmm.
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I used to have so many men.
How this beguiling woman in her 50s.
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She had a Harvard plaque.
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Is it like a mansion?
Yes, it's a mansion.
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million dollars was all gone. Employing whatever means necessary to bleed her victims dry. She
would probably have sex with one of her clients. Hide your money in your old rich man, because she is on the prowl.
Listen to Queen of the Con, Season 5, The Athlete Whisperer,
on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
If you've been following the news,
you know that from health care access to safe schools,
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And it's about time queer and trans youth get the microphone and tell their stories in their own words.
I'm Raquel Willis.
Join me on my new podcast, Queer Chronicles, a show where LGBTQ plus folks tell their own stories in their own words.
This season, teens will share all about growing up in political battleground states.
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grow into. Listen to Queer Chronicles on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever
you get your most fabulous shows.
your most fabulous shows.
Scratch Rewatch Show with Zach and Donald.
I like that theme, by the way.
It's very churchy.
Yes!
Yes.
Yes!
Speaking of churchy, dude,
do you remember the church episode where we did it in the hospital cafeteria
and you had the freaking straw hat?
What kind of hat is that?
Where it's like a straw hat?
A skimmer, maybe? Really? of hat is that? Where it's like a straw hat and you were clapping?
Really?
Going along with it?
Yeah.
Neil, I think you had a tambourine, as I recall.
That could be. Golly.
Samuel Center
is in the house!
That's Samuel Center.
Joelle, do you have any special introduction you want to make
of Samuel Center, or should we just start talking to Samuel Center?
Just get right on into it.
Hello, Samuel!
Hello, beautiful people.
This is crazy.
It is crazy.
You are a professional, dude.
You came with the mic popping thing.
Donald needs one of those because he spits everywhere.
I have a spit problem.
Yeah, Dan, can you get one?
Samuel has, for those of you listening,
has one of those very fancy circle things you put in front of a mic.
And Donald needs one of those, Dan.
I have one.
I have one.
No, well, we need it.
We need it now.
It's probably called the spit guard or a spit shield.
You know, when I first saw the spit guard was in the We Are The World music video.
And that's where I also saw that you were supposed to hold your headphones like this over one ear.
When you're singing.
So you can hear the harmonies.
When you're down and out.
That's probably, if you care, if you think you look better without headphones on your head, I think that's how you hold the headphones.
Right.
Yes, that's true.
Mike didn't want to mess up the freaking Jerry Carl.
You're right.
You're right, Neil.
All the people that knew they were shooting a video were like, you know what?
When you're down and out and you're right, Neil. All the people that knew they were shooting a video were like, you know what? When you're down and out,
and you're feeling the home at home.
But if you just believe.
Donald, we should do an episode of this
where we recreate the video,
and we each take turns playing different characters
in the song.
Yeah, sure, man.
I fucking did that as a kid.
I used to do that as a kid.
I could do it as an adult, too. I used to love that. i would watch that over and over and over again anyway sorry samuel where are
you samuel center okay where are you it's oprah where are you calling from samuel i'm calling
from a small town called cloquet in minnesota cloquet minnesota okay oprah we got it the far
north welcome you have neil Neil Flynn with us today,
and that's Donald doing his best Oprah.
And do you have a question for us of anything?
Ask us anything.
Ask you anything.
What happens when we die?
Oh, wow.
No, I'm just kidding. I'm just kidding.
Don't do that.
Samuel, you say anything.
Thanks for coming on, Samuel.
Everybody, let's play.
Can you play the music that drives it off?
No.
Go ahead, Samuel.
You got a real question.
Go ahead.
I do.
I have a real question for you.
First of all, thank you for all of the years of entertainment.
This is such a thrill to meet you guys.
Thank you.
No, it's incredible.
Thank you.
So in terms of entertainment, you guys have been there for,
you've been in the business for so long.
And just seeing how things change, and it feels like people's attention spans are getting shorter and shorter.
And Mr. Flynn, such an improv comedy genius.
And Zach, you're a writer.
And Mr. Faison, you just kind of embody what cool is to me.
And you've been doing, I mean, since Clueless, man, my sister was big into Clueless.
And I can't tell you how much I look up to you and have tried to emulate some of the style that you have.
Accepted and received. Accepted and received. Thank you.
But as things have changed and people's attention spans have gotten shorter, how do you feel yourselves adapting as entertainers, writers and improv comedy people?
Do you feel like you've had to shift the way you approach things or do you feel like you've kept it the same to just stay true to your art?
Or how does that feel on your end that's a good question you know they just came out with this
service that i as i understand it isn't isn't doing as well as anyone hoped called quibi which
is basically like 10 minute episodes you can watch on your phone which i would have thought
would would do well because people are commuting and they're sitting in a doctor's office and for
all i know it will it will do well one day. But I was thinking of
that service when you said that. The biggest thing I notice is that whenever I do anything,
if it's a TV show, if it's a film, if it's a music video, if it's a documentary,
everyone writes me on Instagram, when's that going to be on Netflix?
It's as though it's like the only thing most people watch anymore.
So that's always on my mind when I'm going out and I'm pitching a new idea.
I'm always kind of like, wow, I, I, you know, Netflix has so much content,
but in my mind I'm thinking like,
I kind of want this to be on Netflix because that's what everybody seems to
watch these days. Whenever, you know, I'll, I like, you know,
when we were talking briefly about the ABC show I did, um, Alex Inc. that didn't, didn't, uh, last or work that well. But I remember when I was
promoting it, I was just doing anything I could to promote it. Anything, anything, anything.
And then everyone was like, sounds great, Zach. When's it on Netflix? And I'm like, well, it's
not, it's, it's on ABC. It's, it's not, it's not going to be on Netflix, but I don't know. That's
what I just got thinking about that. What about
you guys? I feel like it's, well, you know, while we're in this downtime, I'm trying to,
you know, I got a couple of other voices trying to develop something, you know, to do when,
when we can start to work again. And it's really, I've never done that before. I've never
helped create a show, but I feel like to start a new show now, I don never done that before. I've never helped create a show.
But I feel like to start a new show now,
I don't think attention spans are any shorter necessarily.
People are watching stuff.
It's just not the same stuff they used to watch.
And there's more TV than there ever was.
And I feel like if you're going to start something from the ground up, you can't just do a family living room, multi-cam, you know, it feels like that's
gone.
There has to be something, a hook to the show.
Yeah.
And whether it's, you know, I don't know what really shows are doing, a period piece or
his, you know, real people like, I don't know, the Kennedys or something or the Queens and Kings or something fantastical or outer space.
It just feels like you can't do – the time has passed.
Do the Johnson family.
Although, Neil, you just gave me a genius idea to do a traditional
like living room sitcom, but it's kings and queens in a castle.
I would do it except they live on, like,
the set of The Cosby Show.
They're kings and queens,
but they just have a couch and a television.
But they're royals,
and they've been transported from another era,
and they don't really know why they're there,
but they live in this suburban house.
That could work, or that could have worked in 1986.
Come on, man.
If Alf could work.
I was just going to say Alf.
We talked about Alf extensively in one of these episodes
because I remember as a kid, a child, seeing a commercial for Alf
and being like, that's so stupid.
No one's going to watch that.
And then cut to me like riveted
every week watching
ALF.
What are you doing, ALF?
I recall that being kind of funny. I think it was kind of a
funny show. No, it was genius. And
Max Wright, who is hilarious,
played the father. What are you
doing, ALF? And he notoriously hated
being on a puppet show. He hated every second of it. Oh, wow. He hated the father. What are you doing, Alf? And he notoriously hated being on a puppet show.
He hated every second of it.
Oh, wow.
He hated the puppet.
Fuck that puppet.
I want to walk off this set.
Fuck you, Alf.
I'm going to my trailer, Alf.
Fuck you.
This is a true story. Alf the puppet was actually my sleep paralysis demon from like age three to 10.
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
Slow down.
Slow down.
Slow down.
I didn't say sleep paralysis demon.
What's it about?
I have all their music.
What is a sleep paralysis demon for those of us who don't know?
All right.
So sleep paralysis is like this condition where you're, you know, dead asleep. And you, and if I'm sure, you know, if you don't know,
there's chemicals in your body that release to paralyze you while you're sleeping so that you
don't get up and run while you're dreaming. Right. There's things, there's a phenomenon
that can happen where you achieve consciousness, but you're still paralyzed by those things that
are keeping you sleeping. And I happened to get that and have since I was a really little kid.
And typically,
for whatever reason, whatever you want to say about the human condition or whatever,
when people are stuck in this, they go to a very dark space and usually they see
something really ugly or terrifying. And this, I mean, it could be anything. It can be a literal,
so people call them their sleep paralysis demons. And Alf was literally mine. There was a commercial
on tv where
alf uh pressed his face against the glass it was probably from like the premiere episode
and when i was eight years old i i think specifically anytime i would get in the sleep
paralysis state there would be alf at the edge of my bed wow like pressing his terrified oh yeah
yeah it's a frightening thing and was alf saying anything to you, or was he just him up against the glass at the foot of your bed?
Yeah, it was just him against the glass.
I don't know, man.
Do you still have a sleep paralysis demon now?
Yeah.
And is it still Alf?
Is it still Alf?
No, now it's just, now it's just, I was going to say something, but I won't. No, no, it's, uh,
it's actually a guy in a suit. Okay. Wow. Wow. That's scary. Well, that's very scary. I, uh, I,
I, that's traumatic, you know, alpha, uh, I didn't have that much problems with Alf. Um,
we, uh, we brought it up, we brought it up on the show before. I didn't know. I don't know if this was in your sleep paralysis nightmare, but Alf has a tail.
Um, we learned, uh, Neil, because, uh, I had the stuffed animal for Alf and I was a child.
And what I would do is I would take the Alf tail and I would tuck it through its legs
and close his legs to give him a giant erect Alf penis.
Mr. Braff, you've changed my life in many ways.
And now I want to thank you because now my sleep paralysis ALF is going to have a big
old tail penis.
So thank you for that.
Now, Sam, I'm going to feel so bad if it goes back from man in suit to ALF with an ALF erection.
I apologize.
But maybe you'll be able to laugh at him.
Just point and laugh at him.
Maybe he'll dissipate.
I'm not sure I understood the question.
I thought you were asking how we...
He was saying now that, in his opinion
and an opinion of others,
things are getting shorter and shorter
for short attention spans.
Do you think there's any way that you have
adapted the way you perform
or evolved things that you're doing
for a shorter attention span,
whether it's anything you do,
maybe in your animated videos,
you,
you know,
I noticed something I'm going to,
I'm going to answer for Donald and Donald,
you pipe in,
you used to post some of your stop motion animation,
longer clips.
Now you're posting very short clips.
Do you think that's for human attention span?
Absolutely.
Cause at one point I realized that,
thank you very much,
Zach.
At one point I realized people were not paying attention
past a minute, you know what I mean?
Fuck that, not paying attention past 30 seconds.
And so now when I do, when I post animation clips,
they're like four seconds or five seconds,
because, you know, if anything,
they'll watch it a couple of times, three or four times
before they move on to the next thing to make sure they're to just to pick up visually what it was that they saw.
You know what I mean?
So like with animation, if it doesn't look right, people don't necessarily pay attention to it.
And also I have a side question.
attention to it. And also, I have a side question. If you're doing animation, is it better for you to focus on a short, do a short little segment really, really, really well, rather than do,
work on a full minute that has mistakes in it? Yeah, it's better to do, in my opinion. If you
can do a full minute of perfect animation, you're great. But no movie is like that either, though,
you know what I mean? There are very few movies that have scenes that are a one or four one minute you know what i mean and if they do do that
it's a special shot and so with animation you try to shoot it just like you would shoot any other
project that you put on film whether it be movie or television you want to make it quick and keep
the cuts coming so that everybody the faster the the pace, the better it is with animation.
The slower the pace of the story, the easier it is for people to tune out.
Sometimes I send you clips of animation that I think is cool and you don't even reply.
And it hurts my feelings.
I'm sorry, because I've seen them already.
I know, but you could say, yes, I've seen this.
I could say, yes, I've seen this.
Thank you.
It's like when my mom sends me a picture of a bird.
And, you know, okay.
But I still take the time to be like, pretty bird, mom.
You know, you might say, hey, Zach, cool animation.
Saw this one.
You know what?
From here on out, because I now know that you are very sensitive
when it comes to.
I am sensitive.
From here on out, I will respond with oh man I've seen that already but thank you all right Sam you'll do
another question I got all kinds of questions but we'll keep it we'll keep it like uh just knowing
that Mr. Flynn is there uh which is so cool I just have to say I seriously think you're one of the
funniest people that has ever existed especially in the comedy i told him that too i say i might agree it's just totally true i'm just uh you know just
freeballing here uh let's just say that yeah freeballing always always you don't have to
tell us what your underwear situation is sam put some underwear on i said the wrong word i'm
this is why alf won't leave the foot of your bed.
He wants to see those balls.
Oh, God.
Oh, Samuel.
All right, Samuel, go ahead.
Free ball away.
Janitor spinoff of Scrubs.
Let's just say they brought it back.
Let's just say they got Mr. Braff and Mr. Faison
signed on as co-stars in at least the pilot episode.
Where would you want to explore the janitor's character now?
And what would you want the episode to revolve around?
What kind of stuff would you like to be in it?
Outer space.
That's where it's set.
We're marooned in outer space.
So it's sort of like a Gilligan's Island type thing.
Instead of an island, we're on a planet or a ship.
Are we on a ship, Neil, or on a planet?
A ship.
And then toward the end of the first season, it lands.
Sort of like Josie and the Pussycats.
The janitor and the doctors.
Yes, it's very much like Josie and the Pussycats.
I was hoping you wouldn't notice that I stole
the... So the janitor's
also in a band.
Yeah, we're all musicians, yeah.
Neil, you joke,
but I would watch this show. I mean,
you don't necessarily steal the character from Scrubs,
but you could be... Your character
is a janitor on a spaceship,
which is a character
you never see.
Who's cleaning these spaceships?
Yeah, yeah.
That's funny.
Donald, you watch so much sci-fi.
Have you ever seen anyone cleaning up inside any of those ships?
No, never.
Not even the Millennium Falcon, which is the dirtiest spaceship in the galaxy.
No one's ever cleaned it.
Inside or out. No one does ever cleaned it. Inside or out.
No one does any maintenance.
Never, ever.
Maybe Geordi did a little maintenance.
But Geordi was like a, he was an engineer though, man.
He was like, you know.
Oh, that's right.
I knew he was working on something.
Just like your character would often be doing something.
We joke about Neil that we sometimes were like, you know what?
The janitor was actually a good janitor for all his, he really worked a lot. He was be doing something. We joke about, Neil, that we sometimes were like, you know what? The janitor was actually a good janitor for all his,
he was, he really worked a lot.
He was always doing shit.
And you always,
you always were actually working.
I would have said the opposite.
There was, oftentimes I would say,
should I be doing something?
I'm constantly just walking
around a corner
with nothing in my hands,
you know, what are you doing?
Wasn't there a time
when someone, a director, said to Mop in missions,
and you're like, there's a carpet.
That's funny.
I don't remember that.
Anyway, I'm very interested, Neil, in developing this
You're a Challenger on a Spaceship series.
Okay, yeah.
Because it's about three guys that they're marooned out in space.
What did they do beforehand?
Were they scientists?
They were on a mission.
Donald and I were the astronauts.
Well, two guys were on a mission, and one guy was cleaning the ship for them.
No, no, no.
Donald and I are on a mission.
And part of this mission, because there's been a lot of complaints about cleanliness in spaceships,
they sent along a member of the janitorial staff to keep the ship clean while they're on their mission.
Right.
And then once it crashes or whatever, the status, you know, the totem pole is scrambled.
Yes.
Right.
Well, yeah.
Now the big scientists, you know.
Are scared shitless. And the janitor's like, I can handle this. Guys, follow my lead. Yes. Right. Well, yeah. Now the big scientists, you know, are scared shitless,
and the janitor's like,
I can handle this.
Guys, follow my lead.
Yeah.
So the janitor becomes the captain.
Yes.
And maybe Donald and I are injured,
so we can't really do much,
but the janitor takes over.
Well, we don't have to be injured.
We just have to be, like,
kind of, like,
not really good with other things other than piloting and science no
survival skills whatsoever yeah whatsoever right that's good neil so neil's character is like not
only was he working for a custodial staff but he was an amazing survivalist and donald and i don't
know anything about how to survive on this random planet our Our journey could have been just,
we were supposed to go to the International Space Station,
and that's it.
And somehow we got knocked off course by some crazy-ass gamma wave
or some type of microwave or something like that,
and it sends us into a wormhole,
and we wind up in this fucking galaxy
where we don't know shit about anything.
Right.
And don't know how to survive
other than if we were to be
on an international space station.
And Neil Flynn.
The janitor.
Janitor.
Hey, you know what?
I just thought of something.
What's up?
Didn't Star Trek, they went to different planets and stuff, right?
Yes.
They never wore helmets or suits.
Ever. They had oxygen in those.
All those planets had oxygen.
They were all life-supporting planets.
Right, apparently. I imagine they made that decision
early on. Well, I imagine, like
you said, with the headphones not looking good,
I'm sure that, what's his name,
Captain Kirk was like, you're not putting a helmet on this head.
Right.
Shatner was like, no way you see this. You see the helmet on this. Shatner was like, no way.
You see this?
You see this?
No way.
Shatner.
Yeah, so that's the idea.
Joel, will you produce?
Joel will produce.
Thank you.
We're off to the races.
Samuel, thank you for calling in, my friend.
Oh, it's such a pleasure to meet everybody.
Thank you very much.
Thanks, Samuel.
You're awesome, man.
And good luck.
And listen, don't let those monsters keep you in bed
be safe
now I'm going to show them my balls and laugh at them
and that's a lesson
for everybody out there
if you're ever afraid show them your balls
and just laugh at them
I'll see you in jail
maybe not
Donald's like well
never mind
be healthy man take care oh my god I have so many questions Donald's like, well, I'm like, never mind, never mind, never mind. Bye, Samuel. Samuel, be well. Be healthy, man.
Take care.
Oh, my God.
I have so many questions.
Back to space, janitor.
I love that Neil's like furiously taking notes about this.
Yes, I am.
I wonder if part of it should be a game show or maybe the whole thing a game show.
Just for some reason, we're sticking with these elements that are a janitor lost in space.
Okay, Carter family.
What is the capital of Shod?
For the Stod.
Stod.
Stod?
Yeah, and believe it or not, Neil, Stod starts with a G.
There's a silent G.
What?
Yeah, I believe the spelling, Joel, if you check, is G-S-T-A-A-D, if I'm not mistaken.
Stodd.
Go ahead.
That reminds me of Djibouti, I think it's pronounced, except it starts with an N.
I think a D. Djibouti starts with a D.
Oh, you're right.
You're right.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Now, Neil, I remember when we used to do the show you used to do crossword puzzles
did I?
I've gone through phases
the New York Times probably
I remember
I suck at spelling
and I also suck at crossword puzzles
but
would you ever get to
the Sunday one?
have you ever
I hear the Sunday ones are the you ever, you know what I mean?
Like I hear the Sunday ones are the real hard ones.
Monday it gets easy, and then as the week goes it gets more difficult.
You're asking if he could finish a Sunday is what you're asking.
I'm asking how deep into the week would you get,
because I know there were times where you would, you know,
I remember asking you one, and you'd be like,
oh, this is from like a couple of weeks ago.
Hmm.
Oh, really?
Well, that's, you know, it depends on how hard you work.
Sometimes you just pick it up for 10 minutes and go on about your day.
But I haven't done one in a long time.
But yes, I used to complete most of the time the same day within an hour or two.
Okay.
I can't do it.
I was always jealous of people that couldn't.
I think at least what I know to be true is that actually Saturday is the hardest day.
Sunday is the big puzzle.
Sunday is like the supersized puzzle.
It's not necessarily harder.
So it builds to Saturday, and then Sunday is a bigger one, and Monday is the easiest.
I feel like I have maybe done a Monday.
All right.
I remember somebody saying that to me and being like,
oh, okay, let me get the one on Monday.
I just don't know enough stuff.
And then I realized, boy, you had to read the paper, too.
You also had to know a lot of trivia.
I mean, I could do it if it was like, you know,
three letters, star of a sitcom, alien puppet.
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This was a nice, nice callback.
Thank you, thank you.
That means a lot to me.
We barely talked about the episode,
but we should talk about the St. Elsewhere cast
that was visiting in this.
Did you guys, either one of you,
watch St. Elsewhere back in the day? I did.
Denzel.
Was it Denzel's
first role?
I don't know if it was his first role, but I know he was on
St. Elsewhere. Him and Howie
Mandel. Yeah. Yeah, that's right.
What's the theme song like?
Da-da-da-da-da-da
Da-da-da-da-da-da
Da-da-da-da-da-da Da-da-da-da-da-da song like... Something like that.
That sounds very familiar. I visited the set once.
My parents watched it. I believe
it was Bruce Paltrow,
Gwyneth Paltrow's father, who was a very big showrunner then, who produced it with others.
And my dad knew someone. We were visiting L.A. and my dad knew someone. We got onto the set.
It was like the first real big TV set. Interestingly, I'm thinking about this out loud.
The first real set I ever visited was a hospital set, which was St. Elsewhere.
set I ever visited was a hospital set, which was St. Elsewhere. And I think it was beyond my,
it was too old for me as a child, but I remember my parents really loving it.
Joelle just told me that Denzel made his feature film debut in the comedy, A Carbon Copy. And then he was, that was 81. And then he was cast in the, so it's the second part probably. And he was on St. Elsewhere 82 to 88.
That'd be cool to go back and watch
a young Denzel on that show.
Well, the crazy thing is he's barely on the show.
Oh, really?
Yeah, you know, they didn't use him a lot on the show.
And which turned out to be great for him
because he would be able to go and do movies instead of, you know
what I mean? They were like, well, you're not on the show this week. And he'd be like, oh, okay,
well, there's this dude doing this project. I, you know, I'm going to sign on and do it then.
So like, I remember Cry Freedom coming out. Oh, I remember that movie. You know what I mean? Him
in, uh, that's an amazing movie. If you haven't seen it, Cry Freedom, Cry Freedom, him in, uh,
Fish Call Wander. No, was it the Fish Call Wvin klein it was kevin klein yeah and so i remember they did i
remember that came out and i remember being like holy cow the dude from and this is when my parents
were like informing me no this guy is a amazing actor he's done he did theater in new york you
know what i mean he's now blowing up as an actor. You should really check out, uh, if you, cause I, you know, I wanted to be an actor
at an early age. They were like Denzel Washington and they showed me cry freedom. And I remember
being like, Oh my God, this is the most amazing movie ever. Yeah. That was incredible. And, uh,
and I was very young when that came out. I don't know. And then, you know, from that Mississippi Masala and, you know, The Mighty Quinn and a bunch of other movies.
Wow.
Yeah.
And then Glory eventually, right?
Of course.
Glory was one of the first times as a child that I knew who he was.
And I had just never seen a performance better than that performance in Glory.
By the time Glory came out, I was well-versed in Denzel Washington.
William.
Go ahead.
I was just going to say that for me,
William Daniels is the voice of Kit.
Yeah, Knight Rider.
And when William Daniels started speaking in this episode,
I had forgotten.
I went, oh my God, it's Kit.
Yeah.
William Daniels was the voice of Kit.
I never watched that show.
Oh, yeah?
You never watched Knight Rider?
Not one time.
He's a little bit older than us,
so Donald and I were right in the pocket
for A-Team and Knight Rider.
Did you ever watch A-Team?
No.
Oh.
Or the Dukes of Hazzard?
No.
Never watched, well, you know.
I went to Universal Studios.
That's a whole new show now.
When I was a kid,
we went to Universal Studios, the tour,
and they had a Knight Rider car, and you could get in it,
and the car would talk to you.
And it was amazing.
In hindsight, as an adult, they obviously had a hidden camera
and a guy somewhere in the room.
But as a child, I was like, holy shit, it's Kit.
And I just remember thinking he was the coolest.
And he would say things to try and show off that he could see you.
He'd be like, I like your blue shirt.
And I'd be like, oh, my God, Kit.
But they didn't have – it wasn't William Daniels sitting in some room somewhere.
Probably not.
No, I don't think they paid his rate.
Did he go on to do Boy Meets World after all of that, after Knight Rider and everything?
Wasn't he like the next door neighbor?
William Daniels?
Yeah.
Yes, but I don't know about Boy Meets World,
but certainly it would have been after St. Elsewhere.
Wasn't he, I think I'm mixing him up with somebody else,
but wasn't he in The Graduate?
Oh, I don't know.
I don't know.
That's a good question.
He might have been
Dustin Hoffman's dad.
The one who says plastics?
Is he the one
who says plastics?
No, but that's in their yard.
That's right.
That's a neighbor, right?
Or a friend.
Yeah, I can picture him
saying Benjamin.
Benjamin.
And if it's not him,
it's an actor that
reminds me of each other. Checking face. And then Ed Be not him, it's an actor that... Oh, Joelle's checking. Reminds me of each other.
I'm seeing her on checking face.
And then Ed Begley.
Ed Begley.
And also Stephen First, who is famously in Animal House.
Yeah.
Have you seen Animal House, Donald?
I have seen...
Yes, I have seen Animal House.
I saw Animal House the night before I left for college.
Was college like Animal House for you?
Did it live up to it?
Well, you know, it wasn't quite the same, but I did join a fraternity, probably influenced
by that somewhat.
It seemed like they were having fun.
Yeah.
Did you toga?
I don't think we ever did a toga thing.
That would be a little too on the nose.
Dude, what's up with the zombie
movie all of a sudden in the middle of this episode out of nowhere it turns into a zombie
movie i know it was mark buckland directing i remember and uh i remember it was kind of like
a wide angle lens and trying to do uh all sort of a zombie film i thought that was weird too
did you notice it sorry i'm going i'm jumping around but at 703 i don't know if you noticed this but the score all of a sudden has like record dj scratching in it did you notice it's sorry i'm going i'm jumping around but it's 703 i don't know if you noticed
this but the score all of a sudden has like record dj scratching in it did you notice that
i didn't notice there's like a score cue like all of a sudden it's like
no fucking way like fresh prince of bel-air oh wait so so joelle is saying that joelle are you
saying that he was in the graduate then he was indeed sorry yes he was in the graduate neil you're right
okay all right there you go um daniels so in this episode you know jd's all word that he uh
has gotten sick from uh and i remember when i was a kid i just felt invincible you know what i mean
and you know even with even with things that I shouldn't have been doing where I should have been using protection, I felt like invincible.
Like, you know, motorcycles, whatever it was, where I should have, you know, wore a helmet.
I didn't.
You know what I mean?
And because of that, I got a lot of kids.
But the thing is, I don't feel that way.
Are you using a cryptic analogy because
your daughter is on your lap yes i see yes i followed it now yeah uh you didn't you didn't
wear a helmet when you were on your motorcycle absolutely right but the fear of disease or uh
hurting myself in any way never came across my mind. You didn't think about things like that.
Now,
I have nothing but fear when it comes
to that stuff. You know what I mean?
And it's...
I noticed
that I've, because of the situation
that we're in and
because of isolation
and quarantine and everything
like that,
I treat people a lot differently because of that.
And Ted, the lawyer, does that to JD at one point where he's like,
he's trying to play it off where he is, you know, things will be fine.
And then he's like, hey, don't you want your pin back?
JD's like, don't you want your pin back?
And Ted's like, no, keep it.
Yeah.
And that's kind of how I am now.
You know what I mean?
Like when we get groceries delivered now, they knock on the door.
I'll wait a minute before I go to the door just to make sure that the air
around the door isn't, you know, like if we were in a room right now
and, Neilil you would have
coughed like that i'd be like you okay man i know i was coughing last night and i was like oh my god
my girlfriend must totally think i'm sick i'm i don't know if you guys are conscious of that
you're like you now you cough in public and you're like no no i'm fine no no no i'm fine i'm fine
tickle in my throat and and that's you you know, this episode, you know, everybody needs to, first of all, everybody
needs to, first of all, chill out.
You know what I mean?
I know that this is a very dangerous and scary time for us and everything like that.
But you're always jumping to the worst case scenario.
You know what I mean?
You have a, you know, a feeling in your foot.
You jump online and the next thing you know, you've got GERD.
You're telling everybody, oh, I've got a gout.
You know what I mean?
It's not GERD.
GERD is something in your digestive.
If you have GERD on your toes, you're fucked.
Yeah, you're fucked, right.
But you know what I mean?
I don't know if everyone's like that, Donald.
You and I might be neurotic and looking everything up
and thinking we've got something bad,
whereas other people might be like, you know, I'm fine.
I don't know that many people that are, that think that way.
You know what I mean? I, I think there's a fear.
We talked about this earlier.
There's a fear of going to the hospital and finding out that something's wrong.
So I think a lot of people, when something does come up, they're like, ah,
you know what? I'm not going to find out about it. If it's really bad,
it'll kick my ass later on.
And then I'll have to go to the hospital and they'll fix it then.
But, you know, for me personally,
nowadays what this episode did for me when watching it was like,
it made me realize I have a real phobia when it comes to germs now.
And I have a real phobia when it comes to other people's germs now.
And it has a lot to do with what we're going through. But I didn't have that shit when I have a real phobia when it comes to other people's germs now and it has a lot to do with what we're going
through but I didn't have that shit
when I was a kid I wasn't afraid of things like this
you know what I mean
there were people that got stuck with needles
when we were doing the show there were a couple of people
that accidentally got stuck with needles fucking
around with the props you know what I mean
thinking oh this is fake that would have freaked me out
I would have lost my shit nowadays
I'd be like, I'm dying.
I know I'm dead.
Sarah was the only person that I knew.
Sarah Chalk was the only person that I knew that was like, if she had the chills, it was life or death.
I'm dying.
I know I'm dying.
You know what I mean?
It must be a real thing. I mean, how terrifying for real medical personnel who get stuck, I'm sure, on occasion.
If the person had something serious, how scary that would be.
We're walking around the house.
Don't get sick and don't break your leg.
Don't get hurt.
You know what I mean?
The kids are playing around.
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
Everybody calm down.
We don't want to go to the hospital right now.
Now's not the time to go to the hospital.
Yeah, that's right.
Well, really, there's, you know, it's never a good time to go to the hospital right now. Now's not the time to go to the hospital. Yeah, that's right. Well, really, there's, you know, it's never a good time to go to the hospital.
But, yeah, I thought about that.
Like if you had an appendix.
Right.
I was going to say ass cheek.
Yeah, I can have my ass cheek removed.
But it was an elective surgery, it turns out, so I couldn't have that done.
But, yeah, you don't want anything to go wrong.
Well, we'll see, you know, in the next week or so,
if any of this people crowding around each other is going to happen.
Turns into something.
Well, I actually have said, not to be Debbie Downer towards the end of the episode,
but that things are spiking back up in L.A.
And no one's talking about it because there's plenty else going on in the news, as we all
know.
But I read some articles like, why is no one talking about the new COVID spike in Los Angeles?
I think there's spikes in a lot of places, but New York is going down so much that it
looks like a flat line for the country.
Oh, you mean like the national line, yeah.
Yes, yes.
Well, yeah, I fear that everyone's kind of over it.
People are like, all right, we did that.
Fuck it.
We got to get out of the house now.
And that might be fine if you live in a place where this isn't as prevalent.
But in LA, it does appear to be climbing back up.
And the only reason why we're talking about this right now, we know we try to get you
away from, as listeners, and we try to keep this as...
A distraction.
As much of a distraction as possible.
But this is in the story.
Yes.
You know what I mean?
And so that's why we...
That's why, guys.
It's in the episode.
And so, you know... What about Scott Foley being left... I mean? And so that's why we... That's why, guys. It's in the episode. And so, you know...
What about Scott Foley being left... I mean, listen, and Joelle, please weigh in as the only female on the panel.
But Scott Foley being left alone by Sarah, standing there with his roses, it just felt a little like just so mean.
I mean, with Elliot, she found love and and or not love necessarily but
she really liked this guy he's about as charming as a human being could be he looks like scott foley
she's like she leaves him she leaves a lot like scott foley it looks exactly like scott foley
she leaves him at the door i mean i don't know what are your thoughts on that yeah i think okay
so i didn't get into movies from the 70s until like i was in
college this is sort of my first experience watching a woman be like listen i like you but
this career i've invested in is everything to me and so we have to pause because it wasn't even
like a solid breakup she's like right now i can't make this work and i like as a you know
when this came out because once i'm like 12 and i was like you could just leave a dude for work
it was brilliant to me i was still in the light boys at that age and I was like you could just leave a dude for work it was brilliant to me I was like
I still didn't like boys at that age and I was like oh so tedious and so for her to just be like
I'm gonna work on my stuff I was like this is brilliant oh my god I really like this scene
oh I okay there you go there's the answer I I was like I mean I was impressed by the character
making that choice because the writers really went out of their way to make sure there was absolutely nothing wrong with this guy.
I mean, he was as dreamy as it could be,
but she was getting distracted from her work.
And she was like, look, I really am excited about this,
but this is what I've worked my whole life for.
So I got to push you away.
He's not gone though, is he?
No, he comes back.
He does come back.
But I don't know that she was distracted. I push you away, which I... He's not gone, though, is he? No, he comes back. He does come back. Yeah.
But I don't know that she was distracted.
I think it was how the hospital reacted to her
and the walk of shame in the beginning of the episode.
I think that was more of a reason for her to break up with...
You know, Elliot is very worried about what everyone thinks about her.
That's how the character is.
You know, she even says in the beginning,
99% of my life is me trying to impress my dad you know what i mean and and so i think when the walk of shame thing happened and everyone made fun of her i think
that's that's you know it sent her down the rabbit hole and she spiraled and that's why
but he was also it wasn't just that donald she know, Kelso's like grilling her and she doesn't know the answers to questions at rounds where she always does.
And then she starts getting in her head.
At one point she's like, she can't think of something.
And I'm like, I turned around.
I'm like, come on, you know that.
She's just, she's tired maybe because she was up all night playing school girl.
Right.
But I think that stems from, once again, Kelso seeing her at the scrubs machine and giving her shit for not having her scrubs that day.
You know what I mean?
I think – I don't know.
I could be wrong.
I don't know.
It's probably both, a combination of both.
But anyway, we all know the spoiler alert that Scott Foley comes back.
He ends up being an animal – is he a marine biologist or an animal trainer at SeaWorld?
Something like that.
But what a great scene that was, though, too, man, where they break up.
Because it looks like it's going one way, you know,
and there's a great misdirection, right? You see her breaking up with him earlier in the script where he comes to visit her and she's like, and he's doing all the right things and she's getting pissed off that he's doing all the right things.
And then she comes out at the end and it seems like she's gotten over all of the BS that she was holding on to because of her walk of shame situation.
And then in the middle of
it, she discovers, wait a second, it's not just that I am distracted because of how perfect you
are. And now's not the time for me to be distracted. Now's the time for me to be the best I possibly
can be so that in a couple of years, in a few years, I can find another, I can find a guy just like you and do it all over again.
And this time for keeps.
And I feel, and I, the way they both play the scene is perfect because it really does feel like Sean is hit by a Mack truck because he doesn't see it coming.
You know what I mean?
He sees it as, okay, she had a bad day.
I'm going to bring her flowers and cheer her up.
Yeah. And now she's walking back into the hospital and I okay, she had a bad day. I'm going to bring her flowers and cheer her up. Yeah.
And now she's walking back into the hospital,
and I'm standing here with a dozen roses.
I felt bad for him.
I'm such a sucker for it.
The writers really know how to get me with, you know,
love that cannot be.
I'm like, oh, this poor guy.
He's, like, crazy about this girl.
He's standing here with roses, and he's like,
he goes, I'm going to wait here,
because I know you're going to change your mind in two minutes.
And she's like,
I hope so.
And then she doesn't.
And then he trashes the roses.
Well, do you think he trashes the roses
or he leaves them
and people just walk all over him?
I couldn't just figure that out.
Yeah, I just thought of that.
When I first saw the roses,
I thought,
eh, come on.
That's a little bit of a hissy fit.
Like he was jumping up and down on me
yes yes stomping on him
but the only reason I know that he
doesn't disappear well
come to think of it oh no
the last episode I guess
of season one is somebody's wedding
is it Turk and Carla
no we don't get married until season
three I think well then
or the end of season two.
When we were shooting that episode, he was there.
In the last episode of the season?
At your wedding.
Yes.
Oh.
Was he at Elliot's date?
I don't know.
There's so many fans right now that know this show better than us.
They're like, you idiots.
He's in episode da-da-da-da-da-da.
And this one and this one and this one.
But we don't know
oh yeah let's ask the wiki guy all right so neil we have this guy his name is um
trevor guy trevor wiki um we have a question how many more episodes is scott foley in and was he
did he attend donald and carla's wedding hey guys, Scott Foley appears in 12 episodes over
seasons 1, 3, and 8,
including Turk and Carla's wedding reception
in the season 3 finale.
Alright, we gotta wrap this up, guys. Neil, I'm
sorry to keep you so long. We've been going an hour
and 45, 6 minutes.
It's okay. I enjoyed it.
I hope you had a good time just shooting the shit
with us. We miss you. We miss you big time.
We'd love to have you back, too, if you ever want to come back and hang out with us.
Yes, please.
Yeah, I will.
Because this was fun, but I thought we would talk about me more.
So about halfway through, I got kind of bored.
Oh, he checked out.
Until we started talking about the night terrors guy.
Alf at the foot of his bed.
Paralyzed sleep team.
Against the glass glass by the way
Donald remember we were speaking about that rap song
Sir Mix-a-Lot put him on the glass
Put him on the glass baby
Yeah his nightmare is Alf putting him on the glass
Yeah that would do it for me too
That would be a rap for me too man
Now I have the visual of Alf putting his breasts on glass
Or his tail penis
Or his tail penis
On that note thank you everybody for listening.
We really appreciate it.
Follow Donald and I on Instagram, especially Donald because he doesn't have as many followers
as I do.
He's very upset about it.
I am very upset about it.
We even talked about it on the podcast and my shit hasn't moved.
It hasn't moved.
Don't yell at people, Donald.
It's not a way to end the podcast.
I just don't.
I think it's disrespectful.
I think it's disrespectful. I think it's disrespectful.
Okay, calm down.
I was in Clueless, damn it!
Oh my God, I was in Clueless, damn it.
You guys, follow Donald.
And also, please rate our podcast.
You know when you get out of an Uber and they're like,
five stars, five stars.
Give us five stars because apparently that means something
in the podcast world.
And tell your friends to subscribe.
We're having a blast doing this, and we're
going to keep doing it for the foreseeable future.
Is it free to subscribe?
Yes, it's totally free, Neil.
We just do this. It's paid for
by advertisers playing ads,
and you can listen to it
anywhere for totally free. Yes, Don, what were you
going to say before you lead us in song?
I was going to say, and you know,
we'll have Neil back back on and we'll
talk about more things yeah i wanted to get into i wanted to get into the fugitive yeah i wanted
to talk about that let's save it maybe he has a story about harrison ford being difficult to save
it all right thanks for listening he's worked twice with harrison ford though he's worked twice
with harrison ford that's right he's my buddy. Once in The Crystal Skull and The Fugitive.
Yeah, for one day each time.
Right.
Well, one scene you had way more lines than just,
Kimball!
Yeah, that's right.
Was that all it was?
Kimball.
Yeah, it was more in the script.
Not much more, but I was wondering which take they would use
when I saw the film.
I wonder what I'm saying.
Now, back up. Come toward me. Let me saw the film. I wonder what I'm saying. Now back up.
Come toward me.
Let me see your hands.
You know, all that stuff.
And I see the movie and it's Kimball Bank.
He's cut straight to the shot.
Well, Neil, you're in what I consider a classic.
So that's just cool to me.
It is a really good movie.
It's a great.
It is, right?
I recently rewatched it and it's so good.
It holds up.
Oh,
it holds up.
It's so good.
All right,
Donald,
lead us in song.
You got mad last time when I did it.
I want Neil to do it.
Neil,
can you just go five,
six,
seven,
eight real quick?
Yeah.
Five,
six,
seven,
eight.
I said stories about a show we made.
About a bunch of docs and nurses in a Canada who love me.
I said, here's a story
that you all should know.
So gather round to hear our,
gather round to hear our
Spoke Rewatch Show with Zach and Donald.
Mm-hmm.
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