Fat Chance Podcast - Ep.25 - Dan Bartels & Jack Mielke

Episode Date: August 19, 2021

If your looking for some serious misinformation and poor geography skills look no further,

They had like two cases, but I think 12 is enough plus Coors and Spotted Cow. You're going to drink whatever. I know that. If we drink all this. Fucking prima donna over here. If we drink all this, no way I make it to open mic. Oh, I'm not driving home, so. I'm already halfway through.

Isn't this a light? These go down so quickly. What's nice is I iced it down early enough, too. So it's like they actually are cold. This is a good summer beer, though. If you have this in the winter, I feel like it's kind of a weird. It's weird, but I'd still drink it.

I don't really care. Spotted cow. What is up with your mic? Twisted it around that thing. I got caught. Yeah, you want to talk into the side part of it and make sure.

No, not that part. Don't suck on it. No, see how his is? Yeah. I'm telling you, these stands are terrible

I'm gonna spun it and it caught on this thing manhandling the microphone like a monkey just trying to figure out a rock I was Just me finger fucking it. Like a monkey just trying to figure out a rock. I was looking at all the cameras, too. I hope they're all started. If not, that's my biggest fear is when I'm done with one of these and I'm like, oh, I didn't start the middle camera. Oh, yeah, that would be bad. I could see them all blinking.

That would be my first time. So do most people come in and have shit to say? Last time I was here, we just kind of rambled for like an hour and a half. Yeah, I was messing with you. Oh, really? Yeah, there's no way. I don't plan anything. I was just excited for this one because this is the first one this week I get to drink. I don't like drinking during the week.

I don't either. That's a lie. I gave Baumgart a beer yesterday just to say I gave Jacob Baumgart a beer. That's true. Little Baumgart. I thought you taped every Friday. You do just to say I gave Jacob Baumgart a beer. That's true. Little Baumgart. He's – I wish I could say the same about drinking. I thought you taped every Friday.

You do random days. Oh, I do tape every Friday, but I'm leaving next weekend, and I want to start – like, if I could, start putting two out a week. And I'm just trying to bank some so I don't have to – Sure. Randomly be like, hey, Monday, I need – Yeah. I saw you did the one by yourself.

That's got to be kind of tough. That was tough. To be honest, I might do more of those because it was kind of fun. How long did you go? 39 minutes, I think it was. Pretty good. Did you stop and start or just not stop? I just went for it.

It was weird. I had like a list. You started like, my brother's probably behind the door listening. Yeah. It was uncomfortable. If it was my brother doing this, I would have been like, what the fuck is this motherfucker going to say? But no, I had to write a list down.

Like, all right, let's just talk. And I just ranted about a few things. I wrote it down five minutes before I went downstairs. I'm like, I need something for this week. Yeah, that's tough to do by yourself. That'd be tough. I don't know if I could do that, to be honest. It's not bad.

I was honestly happy we did it together, so it wouldn't just be one-on-one. Yeah. I'm sorry. Am I that do that To be honest It's not bad I was honestly happy We did it together So it wouldn't just be one on one Yeah I'm sorry Am I that uncooperative? Yeah I know I mean I'd kiss you But

No I'm gonna wait here though How I started this When I text you And the freaking Cast where I was right? Fuck yeah Alright cool The fucking garbage man

Was on Grange there Yeah Just literally stopped And there was like 20 cars and I was the last one. And everyone's just coming down the other way, and we're just stopping, going down all of Grange, picking up garbage. No one's going around. Oh, so you did the garbage route. Oh, yeah.

I was literally the garbage man today. That sucks. It was bad, though. I would have been. I feel like they should just go on the grass and just fucking. It took me, like, over 20 minutes, and it said, like, 17 on the GPS. That's tough. Yeah. ass and just fucking like it took me like over 20 minutes and it said like 17 on the gps that's tough yeah it's well dude a lot of the roads like the after the storm we had i don't know what day

it was this week wednesday tuesday was all the traffic lights are out i know i was driving back today and like right before i went to go get beer for all of us it's like why is it taking so long to go down moland or, like. They have, like, makeshift stop signs up and shit. Like, Tosa has nothing. Oh, Tosa's worth. Yeah, I was coming from Tosa. Days later, it's kind of fucked up.

Coming from Tosa, and I was like, well, I'm going to get home at 4 o'clock. I'm not going to be able to eat. Just going to go right in and drink. You know, call it a weekend of no food but just beer. Yeah, there was just random lights too that were out too it wasn't like every light for me like i was going to work and there was like three that were on and then one was just stopped on so i was like it made no sense of power outage no i didn't i didn't get it because we had the the tornado warnings the week before

like the the derecho event it was called yeah weerecho, yeah. We had to go to our garage. Oh, yeah, there was no power out there. All our alarms went off. Yeah, but the next day, everything was fine. I don't know if it just missed us. I mean, West Allis, which is right next to us, got fucking smoked. Yeah. And nothing.

We didn't lose our power. Nothing. I didn't either. It wasn't even that bad. It got windy for like a half hour. I didn't even think it was a storm. One of my coworkers told me that, like, this is like a dork he didn't either. It wasn't even that bad. It got windy for like a half hour. I didn't even think it was a storm. One of my coworkers told me that like, this is like a dorky thing to talk about, but the government like plans for like however many power outages they can.

I'm serious. So they're like expecting one more on the horizon. So they're like, well, if we exhaust our like supplies to get the, like the grid back up, then they won't have it for the next time. Like, I don't know if it's power lines or like light poles. I don't know what they're fucking saving in a storage unit somewhere, but I swear to God, it's all goes. Okay.

I mean, I would buy that, to be honest. He said government, and I was like, oh, here we go. I thought you were going to be like, this is going to sound nerdy, but the government plans the storm. Yeah, I thought he was, too. I was like, bro. They're the reason we have the tornadoes. That's some country I saw. It was probably fake on Twitter. It was like they bro. They're the reason we have the tornadoes. That's some country I saw.

It was probably fake on Twitter. It was like they make their own rain clouds. Isn't it Dubai? I was going to say something. Dubai is a different planet. Why would they need to do that? Just to create rain? I think they use drones, right?

And stimulate the clouds. Yeah, they shoot electricity into the clouds. Something like that. Dubai is a full on... It's like a Marvel universe, I that. I mean, Dubai is a full on, it's like, like a Marvel universe, I think. It's just,

Inside skiing, like everything. I think there's like, there's gotta be super, like, superheroes there or something. There are some weird, I mean,

they're making islands, they're making rain. And it's like in the middle of the desert, but it's like a New York City, like out of nowhere. Like, that doesn't make any sense how that could ever come about.

Seeing buildings go to the clouds. It's like a mirage basically like if you were walking to the Sahara for two days with no water like I think I see Dubai like no you're going insane what if it was like you're correct what if it was like the movie the interview and it's all fucking fake and like it looked like this tourist destination but like I mean for all I don't know anybody that's ever been there for all of us but it looks fucking incredible we've never been there I know one person that's been there

but I mean he could be lying too he could have went there and they're like you're gonna fucking tell him because he wastes all his money he's not gonna say like oh it sucked

don't go there or they brainwash him while he was over there exactly you get off the plane it's one of those pen things I had so much fun to just send him right back

no I think I know yeah maybe one kid that went there in college that was it it's gotta be so expensive I wanna go I just wanna see the cop cars No, I think I know maybe one kid that went there from college. That was it. It's got to be so expensive. I want to go. I just want to see the cop cars or Lamborghinis and stuff.

Speaking of, I saw R8 on the highway today. Drop top, baby blue. This old dude was rocking it. I was like, you got money, money. R8, I think it was either the Aston Martin DB9 from James Bond or the R8 from the first Iron Man or the first two sports cars I ever fell in love with.

It definitely was the R8 from the one from Iron Man. Aston Martin from James Bond is a smoothie. That is nice. Those are the only two. If I had to have a sports car, it would be an R8 or an Aston Martin. Yeah.

I've always thought the R8s are dope. I think his license plate was, like, smoking R8, though. Oh. That's hating on your rumor. Yeah, just get a normal license plate. You can't. You can't with that car. Yeah, you should. You can get a custom, but make it something, like, simple or, like, smooth.

Not smoking R8. What would your custom license plate be? Smoking Toyota Camry? Big smoker or something. I don't know. Chugga chugga. It probably used to be thick. I sent you that one.

I saw a car down in Illinois the other day with a White Sox license plate, and it was just the license plate was thick. Bunch of Cs? Yeah, just two Cs thick. How has that not been taken? That's what I'm saying. I'm like, that's – You can buy the rights, though.

I think you can. So you can buy it from someone? Yeah. Like, if you want your license plate to say thick with two Cs, is that bad? Michael Jordan did that with Jumpman, I know. I've heard that. Have you guys seen that? All of his cars were like –

Yeah, yeah. Like, AJ23 and, like, Air Jordans. Yeah. It's from, yeah from the last dance. Yep. See, AJ23 would confuse me. Just put MJ23. You said AJ, and I was like...

He's got so many cars. I know. AJ, MJ, CJ, TJ. I don't really think about that. You can't just have the same license, but for all your cars. Yeah. And when you have that much money? I think Ferrari's got to be my car. I don't think I could choose anything else. Would you get a red? Yeah. I think you have that much money? I think Ferrari's

gotta be my car. I don't think I could choose anything else. Would you get a red? Yeah. I think you

have to. I don't know. Yeah. Or black. I was gonna say like you rarely see black. I think black

would be sweet. Black would be cool. Like matte black. I want like a matte black. Matte black would be cool.

Are you really matte black? Stop it. Doesn't in every Iron Man movie he gets like the newest R8 for each one? I don't watch any Marvel movies. I was going to say, you're talking to the wrong movie guy too.

I don't watch any movies. I don't watch any movies in general. I think it is. You watch nothing? I watch nothing. He hasn't seen Game of Thrones. I haven't watched anything. You haven't seen Breaking Bad? No.

You haven't seen Ozark? No, you have seen Ozark. I haven't seen Ozark. I haven't seen Game of Thrones. I haven't seen Breaking Bad? No. It took me until season five to watch. No, you have seen Ozark. I haven't seen Ozark. I haven't seen Game of Thrones. I haven't seen Breaking Bad. I haven't seen Sons of Anarchy. I haven't seen anything like that. Yeah.

Like all the... It makes you feel better. I haven't seen Sons of Anarchy. It took me to season five to start watching Game of Thrones. And Breaking Bad took me five different tries to get through. Jeez. Breaking Bad starts really slow. Breaking Bad was so slow.

And then you have one season where you're like, this is really good. And then you're like, all right, so I can watch this. And it just dips down. And then it gets to a pattern. Like, it's about to make a lot of money. Something goes wrong. Yep. Gets out of it.

About to make a lot of money. Something goes wrong. If you don't get caught, what can really, like – The part of those shows that pisses me off, though, is, like, it gets far enough where it's like, okay, they're going to keep a lot of money. Something goes wrong. If you don't get caught, what can really... The part of those shows that pisses me off, though, is it gets far enough where it's like, okay, they're going to keep getting out of it because they want more seasons. Exactly. It needs to be three to four seasons. Anything past that point is ridiculous.

It's like Prison Break. Have you seen that at all? Yeah. It's like, at a certain point, this is fucking stupid. You know they're going to... Prison Break might be the first show I ever binge-watched. I didn't watch that one either. No, it was good.

I enjoyed that one. It surprised me, though, when you watch – I don't think you're ever going to watch it. And spoiler alert. They got out of jail in the first season. I'm like, there's like six more. What are we going to do? Oh, yeah, I did hear someone say that.

But then they're constantly on the run, so you know what's going to happen. I don't know why that bothers me from a show perspective. But I think the, the good part about that show is like, it was uncovering the reason why they were in there, in there to begin with, which was kind of cool. And then they do the flashbacks.

I get it. But it's like, I don't know. No, I honestly like first season, like we already broke out of prison. Yeah. We're not even done with season one.

We're not even done with season one. Well, it's like I wanted to watch sons of anarchy, but my and my brothers watch it and i watched the very last episode i would like oh yeah then you can't watch it yeah have you guys seen it or no no i'm not going to ask yeah so spoiler alert for whoever's watching uh but he like literally he like goes to where his the main guy jack's on he's got like the longer blonde hair okay and he goes to like where his dad died i think like on a motorcycle and he gets on the motorcycle he's got the longer blonde hair. And he goes to where his dad died, I think, on a motorcycle. And he gets on the motorcycle.

He's going down the highway. And all of a sudden, he's in the middle. It shows him veering lanes. And he gets to the middle of the lane of the other side. And there's a semi coming the other way. So he just gets smoked. He's just going. And he's riding.

And he just takes his hands off, goes no hands, just puts his head up and then just, just smoke by his own. That's how it ends. Why would you do that? He's like, don't show it. It just like, just goes black. I was like, alright, I'm not watching this. That was kind of dope but like, I don't know. I don't think I can watch it though. He's the main guy.

I hate those endings. You're like, all this and you just fucking kill yourself? Eight seasons? Isn't that spoiler again, all Breaking Bad ends? Yeah. Because you're, like, laying there? Because I saw the last one with my dad. He watched it on TV.

I saw that one, too. You're coming at the wrong time for these jokes. I'm like, all right, there's no point in watching it. On the other hand, though, like, I didn't watch Game of Thrones until I watched, like, one episode of season seven with Sarah and Sean. So, like, I, so much shit got ruined for me, but I didn't realize what I ruined for myself because I waited like a half a year. So it's like, you know they're going to be alive,

but you don't know how. You don't know if, I don't know. There's certain things that are like... Yeah, I knew. When I started, I knew Jon Snow wasn't dead. That was the one thing that I ruined. But when the show starts, you know he's not going to die early.

Exactly. He's a main guy. But I feel like people say for that show is that it's so complex and you could watch it like two times through. Yeah. And I did. That's why you could probably forget it.

I re-watched the last two seasons with my roommate when he started getting back into it. I'm like, all right, I'm going to watch it before the season eight came out. Fine. Because then it was like a refresher. But I hate knowing the end. So like, that's why I don't like movies based on true stories.

If I know the story, what's the point of this movie? This is wasting an hour of what I already know. I agree. Especially sports movies. I know how this works. That's why I don't really like movies in general. I hate sports movies.

Remember the Titans is probably the greatest movie ever made. Yeah, that is a good movie. That is. I don't like sports movies. I just don't. That's like one of the only movies I've seen in the thought. Have you ever seen Cool Runnings? No.

You've never seen Cool Runnings? It's Jamaican boxless. Not your typical sports movie. It's amazing. It is fucking good. It's so funny, dude. Yeah. I mean

You haven't seen Game of Thrones I think that's a little more Dude come on I don't got 25 days To waste of my life To watch those I don't have like

A VHS player To see Cool Runnings It's probably on Netflix That is true You think it is It might be I've watched it I feel like recently

It's a fair point Not recently I thought you said You don't watch anything I mean I've seen That was my childhood. That, Rookie of the Year, Remember the Titans,

Happy Gilmore. My favorite sports movie of all time is Space Jam. Oh, Space Jam 2, of course. Yeah, that's a classic. Does Caddyshack count as one? Uh, yeah. I didn't watch it until I was a little older. By the way, this is a song I copyrighted me.

Can we do it again? If I get a flag for that I feel like we could sing it we sound so bad I mean if you probably not he doesn't like his own voice I'm not gonna like us trying to sing it. That would not go over too freaking well. Oh, that's right. At least it's a little nicer. It's warm, but the last two days it was 90 degrees doing this. And we did it on these, I don't even know what kind of chairs. But we sat up yesterday and you saw my entire body print.

Like, I got to take these upstairs and i was like just leave them in the garage it's fucking gross but they are more comfortable to sit on than just standing on or sitting on these bar stools that's true do you ever do like destination podcast you ever do it outside of this garage destination you go like like literally just like like moving 20 feet that way other people's's apartments and shit? You ever do that? I've done it at three different places besides here. I did it in Morgan Camry's apartment. That's never been released because the camera turned off.

And then I did it in Gaines' basement and then Chad Fry's basement. Okay. But that was simply because – The bars? Yeah, but that was just because it was negative 10 degrees outside sure otherwise i would have done it in here the last two days have been pretty miserable yeah yeah but it's way better to do it in the heat than have to like put on snow pants boots gloves yeah could do a little like ice fishing last time i was here it was cold it was cold yeah we started and we warmed

up a bit drinking like we gotta end this. We also did it for almost two hours. We did. We had cigars. I brought cigars. I cut these off at an hour and a half. Those cigars will burn for an hour and a half. Yeah. That'll do it real quick.

Nice and right quick. Someone's gotta do that butt chug before we leave though. Butt chug. Chug, bud. I think Dan's gotta do it. I don't want to be stuck on camera drinking that shit. Stuck on camera. What do you think is going to happen?

Someone's going to pull out a phone and be like, look how fucking slow he is at the chocolate bar. Oh, I thought you were like... After your career. He's worried about his image, but it's like drinking. My likeness? I was like, I hope I don't get fired. I'm not going to fire myself, so...

I'll do one of the cores, but I'm going to warm it up a little bit. I mean, they're piss warm right there. All right, we're going to keep that one cold. I'm going to speed it up here. Have you guys gone to the fair yet? No. I don't think I've gone since. This is another.

I just don't do much, apparently. I go every year with my mom. I don't go to the fair. I don't watch movies. I don't watch shows. I don't do anything. Hey, what do you do? I really wanted to come here. No, I don't think I've gone since I was probably a little kid with my mom. I don't go to the fair. I don't watch movies. I don't watch shows. I don't do anything. Hey, what do you do? I really wanted to come here.

No, I don't think I've gone since I was probably a little kid with my parents. I don't even remember. I don't think I've actually been to the fair. But like, why, I don't know.

Like, I know everyone goes, but I don't get it. I like it. Just every year, they have all the, like, the new foods. And so my mom and I go every year to

try the new food. It's like a deep-fried fucking... It's one day out of the year. Are you worried? Seriously, it's everything. Dude, they have deep fried ice cream, Oreos, Reese's Peanut Butter. It's good.

I mean, dude, we tried some fun stuff yesterday. Or not yesterday, Wednesday. Dude, they had. Oh, you went already? Yeah. They had bacon cinnamon roll cheese curds. They were probably one of the greatest things I've ever eaten in my life. I just thought it was a little sweet and savory.

I would like to go to see the animals. But the cheese, it was a little savory. You want to see the animals? Yeah. Oh, yeah. We see the animals, too. Well, I know, but that's the only reason I go. You eat a bit, go see the animals.

Eat a little bit. Is it just like farm animals? Yeah. It's like cows. They have like pig shows and shit, right? Yeah. They have like contests for like cows, pigs. I mean, there's some weird animals.

I'm pretty sure my brother bought a pig once with my grandpa. It might have not been the state fair, though. What did they do with it? The county fair. They killed it? Yeah, we cooked it up. They moved one closer. Either you move a bit closer or...

They bought a pig to kill it and eat it? I think it was a county fair. But yeah, my brother was little. My grandpa took him. And my brother, it was like the auction. They had the paddles was little. My grandpa took them. And my brother, they were like, it was like the auction. They had the paddles and everything. And my grandpa gave it to my brother. And my brother was just going for a pig.

How much does a pig cost? And my grandpa was just talking. I don't remember, honestly. But I think it was probably like $1,500 or something. Like, Zach spent like at least, I think, a grand. I think. I could be completely wrong. On a pig?

I think. Jeez, Christ. But my grandpa was like talking to the guy next to him or whoever. And my brother was just throwing it up, and my brother ends up keep throwing it up until they won it. So we, like, had it, like, chopped up, and we had a family party. That is kind of cool. There's a picture in, like, my grandparents' downstairs, like,

Does everybody just kill the animals that they win, or do they do it? I don't know. Do you, like, buy good pigs for your farm? How the fuck does that work? I have no idea. I guess it depends on the auction. What it sounds like is they walked into something,

didn't realize it was an auction, and his brother was just like, I'll take it. I'd like a little piggy. Thought he was getting a pet, but he got breakfast instead. He's like, Mom and Dad are going to love when I bring this pig home. Can we keep it? Where the fuck am I going to put it?

Let's set up a little playpen in the backyard. You're sleeping with it. How long does the fair go on for? Is it a while? I think it started last Thursday and it goes to Sunday. Okay. Yeah, I'm not going. That's a lot in my house. It's like 10 days.

I said this when Morgan was here, but we went to this Wisconsin Products pavilion. I didn't even know they had it, and I go once a year. And it's just like all local people who are making Wisconsin products, like honey, hot sauce, like cheese, like meats and stuff like that. And they have winners, first, second, third, and cases of like, all right, you got first place in like sausage, cheddar cheese.

And I realize you can, people buy these. They're probably all amazing. Dude, you think that one pig was expensive for, let's say you bought it for $1,500, which I think that was a shit pig. I don't know. I don't remember. It's got to be way more than $1,500. You know the market value of a pig? Why do you say that? Well, let me just put it this way. Of course it's It's got to be way more than $1,500. Do you know the market value of a pig? Why do you say that? Of course it's $5,500.

It's always $5,500. The second place slab of pork belly or bacon went for about $2,000. Oh my god. Someone bought just the size

of my computer of bacon for two grand. Dude, there was, like, ricotta cheese that you can buy at the grocery store for, like, three bucks. And, like, yeah, we'll give you $1,200 for it. Who's buying that? I don't know. So, if we're saying it's the size of that. Probably his brother who was like, I'll take one. No, we got the whole damn pig.

Okay, say if it's that size or whatever, how many slabs are you getting off a pig? Isn't a pork, it's like the whole fucking pig, isn't it? The whole thing? I don't know. No. You're not eating the head, you're not eating the ass. You're not eating the pork. You are eating the ass.

The portion is probably. You might be eating the ass. I'm not eating the ass. Do you know pork butt is pulled pork right no love ass you love that fair enough there's brisket that even that's a cow I'm just saying like like, the thigh slash butt cheek of the pig, and the main part of the pig is the pork belly. Other than that, there's nothing you really eat off the pig. So, like.

Well, there's the pork shoulder, the pork butt, pork belly. It's like the torso. You have the spare ribs, the back ribs. What's the difference between spare ribs and back ribs? Back and spare. There's ribs on the back and the front. Yeah, so it's the whole rib. I'm almost 90% sure I'm getting this right.

You're bullshitting this right now. No, but think of it like us. Like in the spare and the back. Our rib goes from here to here. Imagine cutting it in half, and the spare is like here to the front. Back is here okay that's makes sense right i guess but what do you think he's got like 19 sets of ribs just like one here

what is it i was just i i kind of meant what was the difference in the meat too um so if it's if it's still ribs just front back why are they called so like different things and they probably taste i think i think like so baby back ribs i think they taste better or they're like more tender whereas spare ribs are usually what people uh like slow cook to like really break it down it might be a little tougher towards the front um i used to know way better when I was smoking meats all the time last summer. I used to be a butcher. I don't even know the answer to that. Honestly, God, I don't.

Why the fuck do you not? I drove past you. Were you a good butcher? Like a T-bone? Like a beef tenderloin? Here's a pork butt. No. I know the meats and I know how to prepare meat, but I don't know where it comes from and what the difference is in the taste and everything.

I don't know. Where were you a butcher? Rapinas in West Dallas. Oh, really? How long were you a butcher for? Two years. Really? Yeah.

Was it fun? It was. I worked with Matty Meyer's dad, Gary, and Kunin, and a few other people. I actually worked at the State Fair, but I've never really been to the State Fair. I worked at their tent, and I was a bartender. Here.

But. I don't know. This is one of these episodes where you don't lose a tooth. I shouldn't do that shit. What if you farted right now? I turned the microphone off when I do that. Thank you. You can't use your tooth like that.

That one, oddly, didn't feel the greatest. That's why I had to go, like, around. Otherwise, it's usually just one and done. Can you do the one where, like, you have, you have the two beers and you go... You kick it? I've seen it, but I don't know how to do that. I would shatter the beers if I cut my hand off. Yeah, I'm worried about that too. After David's story, I'd never fucking do that again.

What did David do? He took a beer bottle... Wait, how do you do it again? Do the thing where if you have an empty beer bottle... You take it like this and you just smack the top of it and I think the bottom blows out? Yeah, but you fill it with water once in a while. Which I don't even know why it's a cool trick because you're losing the beer that's in it or losing water bottom blows out. Yeah, but you fill it with water. Yeah. Which I don't even know why it's a cool trick

because you're losing the beer that's in it or losing water. No, you finish it and then fill it with water. And then it's supposed to just blow a perfect circle. Oh, I've seen that. He did it and he shattered the bottle. It exploded in his hand. He literally...

He was holding it and it blew up and he sliced one of his fingers pretty bad. It's actually a miracle he didn't cut his tendons. It's a miracle you didn't cut tendons in your hand too. I don't know if you want to share that story on the pod. Are you jerking off too hard? No. Oh, shit.

When was that? It was in Cabo, senior year, spring break, college. It really was not, like, my fault. I'm not going to lie. Okay, yeah. Listen, listen, listen. It's on your hand. Linda, Linda, listen.

The beer bottle was not yours, so that's not your fault. Yeah, that's what i'm saying so i we got down to mexico cabo at like seven or eight we got to the resort i think at like nine or ten probably like nine and first day we're there we're there for five or six days and um we go out whatever we're like on the resort just drinking having dinner and then we go out and there's like a club like on the like dance room i don't know it's kind of like a club on the resort we go in actually maddie meyer was with a bunch of her friends at a different resort that was connected to ours so i met up with her we went he was right down the street he had to pay to get in

um and so we go in. We're like dancing. I'm like going through the crowd. And I was drunk, but not that drunk. And I was wearing like dudes, you know? You were wearing what? Hey dudes? Or like hey dudes?

What the fuck is that? They're kind of like... They're kind of like... They were heard of like Chinooks. They're like the... Are you speaking English? Like a canvas... It's like pool shoes. Like canvas slip-on boat shoe type thing.

Oh, like. Like it's foam on the bottom and it's just like. Like closed-toed Jesus shoes? Kind of. Kind of. Yeah. So like flip-flops with a back but like wicker? No, no, no.

I'm just going to Google this. They're like completely like canvas. I think you would really like these shoes actually. I don't know how to explain. There's no laces or nothing. They're slip-ons. Like Tom's? No.

Kind of. It looks like this. Kind of. Oh, okay. But they're like all mesh. So they're like, they're really real. And the bottom is all

just like a piece of foam. So there's not much traction. So I was going through, well, someone had broken a beer bottle on the dance floor. There's like smoke blowing out and lights going everywhere.

I'm like going through and someone had dropped a beer and the bottle broke and obviously there's beer in it. So it was wet. So I stepped on it while I was going through. I wasn't looking down.

Didn't know there's glass fell down, went and caught myself and put my hand down. And I put my hand down in a huge chunk of glass and it just sliced me right through day one, day one, like four hours. It looked like a shark bit his fucking hand. It was,

it was crazy. I don't want to see like deep in his hand. It is not. Yeah. I hate that. Like I'm near see the bone. So I had to get wrapped, and the whole time I recovered for two months, I kept it like that so it would close up.

Because where this hook went in, it was a chunk was missing. So I straightened it. From that line right there over was just chunked out. Yeah, that shit grosses me out. But you didn't even get stitches. I didn't get stitches or anything. I stayed the rest of the time. He didn't even go to the hospital.

And he had a chunk of his hand gone. So they sent me back to the hotel. Like, we go up to the front desk. I'm like, I think Maddie's cardigan. She had a white cardigan. Wrapped my hand in it. Shout out to her. I probably over one.

A cardigan or like? The sweater, yeah. Not her shirt she was wearing. And so we go up to the front desk. We're like, we need a first aid kit we're all like what's your room number we'll send a doctor up or whatever

I'm like okay they can't even give me band-aids I go to my room they send me back awesome like 10 minutes later someone knocks on the door

I open it it's a guy wearing like a scrubs top and like just normal like sweatpants same shoes you got on

yeah like sweatpants and he's just some front desk worker randomly got a scrub top so it's like fuck some kids actually hurt we gotta find a doctor yeah yeah and he rolls in with a little suitcase he looks he's like like he barely spoke any english he's like like just trying to say anything i'm just like i pull it out he's like he like looks at me and he's like oh i can't help you stitches hospital stitches hospital i'm like i'm not it's 1 30 in the morning i'm not going to a mexican hospital right now you're hammered i'm hammered i'm just like i'm not doing he's like well i can't help you and walked out didn't even give me a band-aid not one band-aid and my hand

is bleeding everywhere so i'm like talking with maddie while she leaves and I just go to bed and I slept with a roll of toilet paper next to my bed. And just every couple hours, like changed it out, just kept wrapping the shit up in my hand. I woke up, my sheets, it looked like I killed somebody in my room. There was blood everywhere. Did it ever stop? It slowed down a little bit, yeah. Were you lightheaded when you woke up? No.

I mean, I was still drunk. It was only six hours. I feel like anybody else would pass. I would pass out if I woke up at seven. It was like six hours later. I would have ran to that fucking hospital. Yeah, because I fell asleep at like two, and then by the time it was all said and done, I woke up at like 7.38.

I called my buddies. I'm like, because I have my own room, luckily. And they're like, I was like, you guys need to come over, because they weren't with me when it happened. And I was like, you guys need to come over. They walk in, like, oh oh where are we burying it they walk in and I'm like holding behind my back and I'm like like you guys like have weak stomachs for this so they're like no we're fine I go like this they're like oh and my buddy's girlfriend at the time was with she

runs out of the room she couldn't handle it so then yeah I just went down to like the pool I go go to this pool oh they don't have first aid go this pool go this one so I go to the one by the beach and there's a guy he like cleans out with disinfectant and hydrogen peroxide basically puts gauze on it and then wraps my hand like here and then around my wrist a little bit and i paid him like 30 bucks i was like hey i'll be back here every morning at eight or nine like will you be here he's like yeah so every day i went and got it cleaned out and then went home they couldn't stitch it because it was 24 hours. Actually, if you fell and hit your head or something, dude,

they were not prepared for anything. There's no first aid kit anywhere. If thousands of drunk assholes just partying all over the place. Someone could have just died. You could have just died. Well, they just want you to go to a hospital because they'll charge you a billion for the ride and a grand for looking at it. And they'll keep you bad enough to

stay there a couple days but good enough so you're alive another 500 to tell you we're out of band-aids bro i got home i went to the i had to drive home from minneapolis to this duluth which is two and a half hours drop people off i went to the er up there they're like yeah it's after 24 hours can't stitch it because you risk infecting it. here's something. He goes, it looks good. I could move it and everything.

He's like, it looks good. Just put Neosporin and cover it and let it heal. Could you imagine if that got infected though or like you sliced some tendons?

How easily, like any of that could happen? When it happened, I had full range. I could do everything. It was just a chunk missing from my hand. Dude,

those trips can be dangerous. We had a buddy. Well, I would have a, I wouldn't say a weak stomach for that, but I would just tell you, like, hey, man, put your fucking hand away. I don't need to see your little claw you got going on right now. I swear you could almost see the bone, right, or something?

Yeah, like, that's fucked up. I can handle blood, like, everything like that. If I would have, like, for me, like, I would have been in, like, shock, and I wouldn't have felt it. The minute I look at that, like, when I split my head open, I put my finger in my head. You have a gash in your head. I went, oh, I'm inside me right now, and I freaked out.

Non-sexual. And then I saw Kyle's spot. He was here, and he did one of those X-Acto knives through his thumb, like a brand new one. And he just showed me the video. He just opened it, so I'm like, dude, like a brand new one. And he just, like, showed me the video. He just opened it. So I'm like, dude, I can't do that. But those trips, you're right, like, they are not prepared.

No, they're not ready for anything. We were in Texas for spring break. Did you go to South Padre? Yeah, sophomore year. Day one, I don't know the full story of how it happened, but a kid broke his neck in our group. Did he die? No. Oh, seriously, I don't know, like story of how it happened but a kid broke his neck in our group did he die no oh seriously i don't know he partied the rest of the night and the next day he was like i have a

sore neck and when i broke it and broke ended up coming back like got checked out when we got home and like your neck is broken and was in a brace for like the first rumor is that he tried doing a backflip into a kiddie pool but I know the guy he did not try to do a backflip that's an easy cop out either you dove or you fell there's no hiding

you can't make a broken neck that cool man don't be like I did a backflip and he didn't say it like I don't even know the full story I don't even think he does because he was hammered but he literally stayed out like a day and a half. Like the first day we sent. It was probably good he was drunk because he was probably more relaxed, to be honest with you.

Exactly, yeah. We sent that first day. We had one kid go to the hospital with an irregular heartbeat because he had like six rock stars because they were handing him out for free. One kid broke his neck, and another kid went home because he wasn't having fun. He went home to Wisconsin? Yeah, he just flew home.

It was a 1400-hour flight, I think. When we were going down, I think. No, when we were leaving, there was a kid sitting next to me in the airport, and he was like, didn't look okay. And, like, started making small talk with me, and he said he went to the hospital there in Mexico. He was going home early from all of his friends because his, like, heart was racing out of his chest,

and he, like, didn't know what was wrong. And they charged him over a grand for just taking his blood pressure at the hospital and shit. Like strapped him down too and shit. It's crazy. I'm not even kidding. He's like, I don't know, this kid might have been fabricating. But he said they damaged his strap and now he's kind of losing his shit and wanting to get out. And yeah, I was like, thank God I didn't go to hospital.

Thank God you didn't go. He was in there with my hand. Like, yeah, thank God. Do you think he's just like coked out or something though? No, he probably was like, thank God I didn't go out. Thank God you didn't go. I was in there with my hand like yeah, thank God. You think he's just like coked out or something though? No, he probably was.

100% was coked out. Yeah. He plays the victim card. He's probably doing some stupid shit. Like really stupid stuff. Well, I have another story

about my school but it's kind of morbid. Like about that, about Coke. There was three like Canadians on our resort that ended up like dying from Coke.

All of them? There was like four. That they got from the resort? Yeah, there was like four kids total. from coke all of them there's like that they got from the resort yeah there's like four kids total i think three of them i think all four of them went to the hospital because like obviously it wasn't yeah they were freaking out whatever and i think three of them died it was like fentanyl or some shit yeah dude that just every time you jump out on that strip there's like a bunch of people a bunch of locals like cocaine well they tell you like at the resort like do not buy anything.

Do not buy anything. Unless it's on the resort, do not buy a damn thing. Anyone coming up selling you coconuts, they're not selling you coconuts. Here's some water. That's what you want for you. The fentanyl thing is scary because that just happened in Denver.

That's happening. I said it with Nathan and Colin that one of my friend's friends just OD'd because it was laced with fentanyl. That is so scary. It's fucking scary. You're like,

I don't even want to touch weed right now. Yeah, honestly. That's tough. Drugs are bad. No, they're not they're fun they're fun fun fun fun fun

as long as you do them safely and the right amount don't overdo it people but it's like what are you doing in like Cabo you probably go off the beach or some shit

late at night like that's the thing you get too fucked up and then some nice guy is like hey amigo you want me

but like that transaction is not actually happening on that sidewalk they're like hey follow me into this alley yeah it's like you gotta like when you're walking that alley you gotta like have that self-awareness to be like i'm making a horrible decision yeah but an alley on a resort is like oh no no i'm not talking about a resort i'm talking about like we went downtown there's like a downtown strip in cabo there's like a two block radius that's safe outside of there it's so fucked up you shouldn't be walking around but there's like these popular tourist clubs slash local clubs too but it's like once you get out

of your taxi there are like there are guys opening the door for you that are immediately like like cocaine you want cocaine you want to party you want this you want that i was in the front all the way until you get to the door of the bar there is someone hounding you so i'm sure if you're drunk enough or whatever you just do it but it But it's like, I don't know. We got like a taxi van down to the strip and I was in the front. And like all of a sudden we pull up and my window is down and I turn to like start paying the guy. And there's four people reaching in the car, like tapping me like, sir, sir. And I'm like, no. I'm like, how's my money?

So they don't see how much I have. So I just give it to the driver. Yeah, this is not a good advertisement for Mexico, but it's actually a super good time. It's fun. Yeah, I've only done... I'm positive, though, El Squid Road. Mandala is fun as hell, too. El Squid Road is four levels.

It's outside, just fences. It doesn't even look that nice on the outside. No, but the basement, there's those construction lift things. They use it in gym and stuff. The DJ is on top of that. The DJ is like the center podium and they can raise and lower it's like one of those like it's like an arena style bar it's crazy fucking cool yeah four levels there's like you though you can like look down the balcony and the inside's like cut out just have shockers walk around yeah yeah i mean they have like i did puntacana and they have like a few clubs that were really fun,

but it's the same thing. It's like, do not leave here unless you're going to. When you leave here to go do the ATV riding and stuff like that, we will escort you there. And it's weird because you can hop on a bus, and you hop on their freeway, and you're like. That's crazy. It's a free throw.

No, you look around. Just even on the freeway, you're like, the fact that this resort is even here is amazing. It looks like something, and I've never seen The Walking Dead, but it looks like something out of The Walking Dead in some places. Just like barren wasteland.

No, you see guys on motorbikes, and then, I don't know, 9,000 pounds of junk on their back. And they're just... Or those landscaping trucks, the big ones with the big beds. And there's just things falling out of the bed at all times. Sometimes a person, there's six people on the back holding it down. We got to pull those guys up. But you know what I'm talking about on those highways in Mexico where they have those military stuff?

Yeah, that's freaky. What are they searching for? Like, that's terrifying to me. They just, they have, like, dogs and just, like, AKs on them. That's so unsettling that they have to be armed with machine guns in the middle of the highway. Like, what are they expecting? Yeah, I don't know. There's, like, random speed bumps just, like, throughout the expressways, too.

All over the place. And you complained about stopping for garbage earlier, didn't you? America's so tough. America's so tough. It's so tough. I would have ran those speed bumps over. They're like those big metal balls though. It would fuck your car up so bad. Oh yeah. Wait, metal balls?

What? They're speed bumps. It's like those rumble strips on highways, but it's like metal semi-circles sticking out of the ground. Yeah, it's like if you took a metal sphere and cut it in half and put them like zigzagged on the road.

Oh, okay. I know what you're talking about. That's their median. They're probably like this big. Yeah. Yeah. Well, they have like full-blown...

Slow down. Well, they have like full-blown curbs too on the highways. They're going like 60, 70 miles an hour with a curb like a foot away. I'm like, you touch that,

your tire's blown. Yeah. We're also blown the fuck up. They're going like 60, 70 miles an hour with a curb like a foot away. I'm like, you touch that, your tire's blown. We're also blown the fuck up. We're going four fucking lanes that way into the barren wasteland. And I promise you, we're not making it back. And we're only 10 minutes outside of the resort. I don't think there's airways. No. They just have coolers with beer on the bus.

There isn't even seats. These are like bench seats. And we're all staring at each other. It's a party bus we took. No one's wearing a seatbelt. Homecoming party bus. You found this school bus. I'm sure this is how we're supposed to get here. Those places are fun, but I could never live in a place like that.

No. Never. I've been there a couple of times. Every time I go back, it's just like, I don't know if I need to come back now. Yeah, you always do. It's so nice, though. I'd like to do it. I never got to do a trip like that with a bunch of people.

I want to do that. I want to go back to Iceland with a bunch of guys. You've been to Iceland? I was in Iceland. I've seen a bunch of people go in there. It looks sweet, actually. It's gorgeous there. Couldn't even tell you where Iceland is see it's like that way and up kind of it's kind of like Greenland is it

Iceland like actually Greenland's actually ice yeah okay I know that but I don't know where they are it's no it's gorgeous it's a lot of like touristy stuff um we got lucky because they say it usually like rains a lot super cloudy we were there We got lucky because they say it usually rains a lot. Super cloudy. We were there for four days. It was sunny and 65 for three of the four. But I mean, there's some cool stuff. And then I want to go on the weekends because they say it's like they party fucking hard on the weekends.

I don't know what I don't know. And then they do nothing during the week. What else are you going to do? And they do nothing during the week. I can see them. It's expensive though. And they don't know what I don't know. Well, and then they do nothing during the week. What else are you going to do? Yeah. And they do nothing during the week. I can see them. It's expensive, though. And they don't tip there. It's expensive to go to Iceland?

Not to go there, but to drink and all that stuff there. I mean, we went to a big Lebowski-themed restaurant there. Ooh. And we got white Russians. And I was like I mean it was this big like yeah that much like the top of this microphone fall and they're like maybe $22 I'm like 20 like yeah and I thank God you don't the tip I'm like think holy shit I'm like this is you don't tip in Iceland no no tips you

don't tip yeah that's why that's why it's more expensive yeah they get paid a lot better than like servers here that's gotta balance out though yeah I mean they're getting paid what $15 $16 an hour or something like that versus we're getting paid $3.40 to be a server but you're also counting on tips

so like it's a give take kind of thing like they're guaranteed to make money but like we also have a chance to make a fuck ton of money if it's a busy night. A lot of people just buy less shit there because they know it's expensive. Doesn't that balance out? Supply and demand. If you're going to visit, I feel like you wouldn't really come back. Fair enough.

I think it's kind of heavy on tourism there. It was a lot of driving. We stayed at the girls' planet and they found this hostel we stayed at the the girls planned it and they found um like host like this hostel we stayed at for the first night and then we were gonna do this like road trip around the island i don't know um and see like see all the island i have no idea what it looks like like

the waterfalls and uh the plane crash and all this shit that's still there. But we want to see all of it. We have to stay somewhere out there and then come back and circle around instead of going back and then doing a whole other trip. So they found, I think, the only house outside of the city there. I mean, the only. We rolled up. Nothing is around.

It's just a house i go we're gonna die like this is the start of a movie and it doesn't end well for any of us like one of us makes it out you're gonna get picked off one by one and we'll roll up and it's a family they're kids i'm like i can't believe you have kids like they have no one to talk to but you guys yeah um are you guys all family like i don't know how this works um is a horse farm and they just had an extra like little spare house we just stayed there i go we don't know these people at all like how are they on airbnb right now that is and it was cool though like they were super nice. Stayed in a little spare room. Just a little English, I assume? Yeah, a little, yeah. What's their native language?

I was going to say, what the hell is this? And then they had all the horses. They were like, yeah, you can go out and talk to them and whatnot. Talk to them? The fuck are they going to say? I brought a box of Cheez-Its out, and I was with my buddy Corey, and I was like, toss some Cheez-Its. And I'm like, I don't know if I can do this right now.

And if you can't feed Cheez-Its to horses, I'm sorry. Pete is going to be on your ass. Trust me, we've talked enough about killing endangered animals last episode and buying chickens from Seven Mile Fair. And now pigs.

Oh, no, no, no. We had half of the past week last episode. Yeah, one episode we Scott's buddies bought a bag of chickens. Like live chickens. And then just put them down the river. Killed them? No.

No, they didn't. What does that mean, putting chickens down the river? What does that mean? They just put them down the river. And then they put them in a cage somewhere. And then coyotes got to them. That story makes no sense. Yeah, we're fine. You're buying a bag of chickens and putting them down the river and then they put him in a cage somewhere and then coyotes got to him. That story makes no sense. Yeah, we're fine.

They're buying a bag of chickens and putting them in the river? Yeah, I don't remember the whole thing, but I know coyotes got to him. They left him somewhere. That's sad. To be honest, they had moments of freedom. They were either in a bag at Seven Mile Fair and then they're like, wow, we have freedom

for about, or space to move for a bit, and then they died. And they got gut. Yeah. It's tough. Yeah, it's tough. I'm glad I'm not a chicken. Yeah.

Do you know we had a chicken shortage? Shortage. Thigh stop. And we have a ground beef shortage. What? According to Sam Harmeyer. Oh, gosh. How have we not had a chicken shortage? I don't understand

how we eat this much chicken and not have a shortage. Because it's all like manufactured chicken. It's not like actual organic chicken farms. They're just pumping up chickens and making them fat and killing them. I get it, but I don't care at all. Do you realize how many bags of frozen chicken

wings are at the store? If I'm not mistaken, you get two wings of chicken, right? What? Yeah. You get two wings of chicken. And your $4 bag of chicken wings that are frozen at Costco comes with like 60. 50. That's 30 chickens in a bag.

Oh, God. I hate this chicken. These things are going to break. I'm 30 chickens in a bag. Oh, God. I hate this chicken. Oh, these things are going to break. Yeah, with me. I'm about to pee my pants. Is there any way we can pause this thing? We can keep talking. Just go.

You peed when you got here. I'm sorry, man. I broke the seal. I broke the seal. My thing with the chicken shortage, though, is they say there's a chicken shortage. I've never been in a scenario where I've gone out somewhere, like went to a restaurant, and they've been like, we don't have chickens. We don't have chicken, yeah. I've never had that. So why I've gone out somewhere, went to a restaurant, and they've been like, we don't have chicken. We don't have chicken, yeah.

I've never had that. So why is wing stock changing to thigh stock? Well, I think it's the chicken wing shortage. Because that's more in demand than chicken breasts and stuff like that. But I feel like if there was some, like, the main, like, supply, not supply. Like, if there was some, like, the main, like, supply, not supply. Like, the people that are using the chicken wings, like restaurants. Yeah.

There's still never been a case where. So, like, they're probably the main people that are buying chicken wings. So, if there's a shortage, wouldn't they be affected? And I've never heard of a restaurant having a wing shortage still. Besides, what is it, Wingstop? Yeah, they changed it to Thighstop or whatever. Or with Rick Ross. I don't understand it at all. You know what is it? Wingstop? Yeah, they changed it to Thighstop or whatever. Or with Rick Ross. I don't understand it at all. You know what I'm saying?

They're probably the ones that are buying the majority of the chicken wings. Oh, the wing companies? Yeah, for sure. Compared to consumers, you know what I'm saying? Oh, yeah. I've never gone to the grocery store and been like, looking for chicken wings. It just says, sorry, shortage. We're out of stock. Honestly, the only thing I've ever seen out the grocery store and been like, looking for chicken wings. It just says, sorry, shortage. We're out of stock.

The only time, honestly, the only thing I've ever seen out of stock is toilet paper. Yeah. Which is insane. And hand soap. Oh, the fact that you could buy, like, it had on the shelves one per customer. That's insane. So you're like, I don't know, do I want soap, dishwasher stuff, Lysol, or hand wipes this week? Or do I got to leave and come back?

Or you got to make four different stops at four different stores around the area and get one. Like, every time I go to the store, my mom would be like, look for wipes or something like that. Yeah, my mom kept telling me everywhere I went, she's like, try and look for hand soap because we're running low. Yeah. Or, like, finally, finally i'm like we had enough toilet paper but she's like if this lasts any longer or you're wiping with your fucking hands she's like look for toilet paper so like all of a sudden you like find one that's like tucked under the shelf from like vietnam it's like dust and shit like that like well this is it

one plot gotta get a little wet and form it again. It's not like wet wipes. You just got wet clones. They do it in for dude wipes. What am I walking into? You guys talking about poop? Chicken. Chicken. Really?

Put it up her butts. Why not? Wing shortage my ass. Yeah, we're wiping with chicken wings now. Oh, yeah, yeah. We were talking about the shortage. We were talking about the wings and then how the only thing that we've seen limited in stores was

toilet paper. Oh, yeah. Isn't there like Thigh Stop now and shit? That's a good change. Is it legit called Thigh Stop or is that a joke? I don't know. I legit saw a commercial. I'm pretty sure they fully rebranded to Thigh Stop. Unless it's a joke? I don't know. I just saw, I legit saw a commercial over there. I'm pretty sure they like fully rebranded to Thigh Stop. Unless it's a joke

that I don't understand. Also like, I mean, dude, those orders gotta be way more expensive. Like, can you imagine like,

Wingstop, like, can I get like six boneless and you're like, can I get six thighs now? And you're like, the bag's twice the size. I'm like,

shit. Why does B-Dubs continue? Because boneless wings aren't actual wings. Yeah, they're not wings. That's your manufactured shit right there. But they do bone in, though. They do.

So what's their deal? Maybe... That's what I'm saying. But do you realize how tiny those are? Maybe those are like... Baby wings. Baby wings, yeah. I don't know.

I think they're growing everything back there. I don't even, like, Buffalo Wild Wings, and it's called BW3s. What's the third wing? Like, we don't actually sell chicken. It's something else. I actually know the answer to this question. Wait, what are the first two? I don't.

Buffalo. Wait, I'm still not understanding this. 3Ws? Wild Wings is two of them? Wild Wings is two of them, yeah. Let's put this together right now. What's the third one? Women, I don't know.

I think it's like we don't actually sell chicken. No, it's like 99% sure it's called like WECK. W-E-C-K, I think. I did a report on B-dubs in school. WECK? What is WECK? It was when they first created the store. It was Buffalo Wild Wings and WEC. I don't remember what WEC was.

I don't know if it was someone's name. Does anybody actually call it B-W-3s, though? No, for a while. It was called B-W-3s, yeah. I'm pretty sure that's the reason. I forgot. For some class, we had to do a whole thing on B-dubs. But don't we technically still kind of call it B-W-3s? a whole thing on B-dubs. But don't we technically, we still kind of call it B-W-3s because we call it B-dubs.

We don't know where the S stops. There's three S's. I need to leave this conversation. He didn't know the first two W's, why would he know the third? No one. I think you might be telling a lot of people that are like, whack. What is a whack? I'm looking it up now because I don't want to be wrong.

Dude, I swear. Weck. It's Buffalo Wild Wings and Weck or Buffalo Wild Wings Weck? I think and Weck, but that's technically three. No one's going to add. What does that mean? N-A-B-W-W-A-W. I'm confused.

I don't get what's going on. I don't need that. Did you already do a chug, bud? No. Okay. The restaurant was originally named Buffalo Wild Wings and Weck. Beef on a Weck is a popular sandwich in New York consisting of roast beef on an au jus soaked. Kummelweck roll.

Kummelweck roll. The original BW3 restaurant was on High Street in Columbus. In 1998, the name was changed to Buffalo Wild Wings Grill and Bar. See? I'm not lying. Okay. How does that carry to Wisconsin people? I don't know.

I don't know. I don't make the rules. Even if it's started with Wild Wings and Weck, I'm more concerned with, you know what would be a great restaurant? Chicken wings and au jus sandwiches. No. That's so basic. I don't understand anything that's going on.

Roast beef and chicken wings. Imagine taking Wingstop and merging with Arby's. That's what it fucking is. Okay, Arby's is nice. But it's roast beef. I don't know, though. If you hide from the roast beef, the rest of the menu is kind of solid. What, though?

I thought the whole menu was roast beef. No. They do turkey wraps, sandwiches. They have curly fries. They just installed the crinkle cut fry. Option number two. Real quick, how often are you at Arby's? I was just there like a week ago.

I can't lie. But it's not bad. It's a solid menu. Where do you think is the number one fast food place you eat at? Oh, I eat at? Yeah. I think I just changed mine recently to Chick-fil-A. What was it before?

I'm talking like grimy, grimy Taco Bell. It's got to be Taco Bell. McDonald's has got to be close, though. McDonald's is second, yeah. I haven't really eaten a lot of fast food, but when I lived in Franklin, it was 100%. No, but over there, we don't really have it around here. We don't have it around here. It's Arby's, which I'm not going to fucking eat, or it's BW3's Subway, or Panera right here.

Panera is not fast food. No, I know. That's what I'm saying. That's all I have is here. When I lived in Franklin, it was definitely Taco Bell. Yeah. Definitely Taco Bell over McDonald's. Taco Bell is the healthiest fast food restaurant.

Seriously. It is. It's a fact. You can Google that right now. Yeah, I've heard that. Yeah. I feel like it's volume. Yeah.

It might be the healthiest. When you show up to Taco Bell, you're like, I'll have a chicken quesadilla. If you only got two things, yeah, I would. You go out there and you eat eight things. Because you shit it out. Because you have diarrhea. You clean out your system. That's what I think it is.

You're right, though. You get all the toxins out ASAP when you eat. So it's good for you. It's actually good for you. Taco Bell is so good for you. Taco Bell is an in-and-out kind of food. Yeah, you're right. Just right actually good for you. Taco Bell is so good for you. Taco Bell is an in and out kind of food. Yeah, you're right. Just right in and right out. Another nerdy

fact though. I heard you don't actually poop out the food you eat right away. No. It's like two to three days later. It's pushing other stuff out, isn't it? Yeah. It's like get the fuck out of my way. I'm coming through. When people are like, oh, I got food poisoning. Last night I ate this gnarly chicken. That's not the case. It's actually like a two to three day lag. I don't know why I know that. But no, you have food poisoning but your body's like, I, I got food poisoning. Last night I ate this gnarly chicken. That's not the case. It's actually like a two- to three-day lag.

I don't know why I know that. But no, you have food poisoning, but your body's like, I need to expel it. So your body's expelling what is in there. When you have Taco Bell and you're like, I got a shit, that's your body being like, that's actually your other shit being like, I don't want to be next to that. What you just ate was not food. So the real food is to leave right now. Like, get the fuck out now.

It was like a weird neighbor just moved in next door, and I think he touches kids. Go. Everyone get the fuck out. Wasn't your intestines supposed to be like 20 feet long or some shit? Unwrapped, right? No, it's got to be way, I think it's way longer than that. I didn't want to sound like a fool because we're talking about a bunch of random ass facts right now. Like a football field.

This is why I need someone to fact check all this shit. We're like, yeah, sure. How long are your intestines? I think it's like a football field. No way. Do we know? I got it. I got it.

I got it. I might go like. It's like a happy medium, so I don't sound stupid. I thought it was like 27. I think it's like 50 feet. I thought it was like 27 feet. Even 50 feet would be like, not even close to 100 yards.

I keep bending over, I laugh, and I'm just laughing in the mic. Wow. 27? 22. Ah, almost 100 yards. Although the small intestine is narrower than the large intestine,

it's actually the longest section of your digestive tube, measuring about 22 feet, or seven meters on average, or three and a half times longest section of your digestive tube, measuring about 22 feet or 7 meters on average, or 3 1⁄2 times the length of your body. Wow. So 7 meters is 27. Yeah. I get it. You mix it up.

You're used to the metric system. Yeah, I've been overseas zero times. Zero times? I've only been across the pond once to Iceland, which is not way. I would have guessed Iceland was the closer one. I seriously have no idea Iceland and Greenland, like where they are. Like there and there. All right, we'll pull up the map now.

God, we need. We need like a projector back or like a wall right here. I need something like a TV right there and just some little. Some little nerd. Some nerd on a computer right here. I need the TV right there and just some little... Some little nerd. Some nerd on a computer over there. Dance monkey, dance. Pull it up. Some nerd that doesn't need Google because fact check is on the spot.

Well, Joe Rogan's got that guy with the laptop. He sits there and pulls shit up. What are we looking up? You've got to find your Jamie. I don't want to get a geography lesson. I don't remember. Oh, yeah. Would you like to do it?

You just got to be here every Friday. No, thank you. No. No, I don't want to buy a world map. I just want to see the world map. Oh, we look real dumb on this episode. Yeah, we're throwing out facts. We don't even know if they're true.

We don't know where shit's coming from, meats, geography. Dude, Amazon is taking over. The first four things I've clicked on just take me right to Amazon. Would you like to buy the world map? No, I just want to fucking look at it. Seven-year-old puzzle.

And I have no whatever in here. You know what? It's an up. It's over and up. It's this way and that way. They're right by each other, aren't they? Kind of. Not across the timeline. They're not, each other Aren't they Kind of So Not across the pond then

They're not No Across the pond would be Europe What do you guys said across the pond Yeah you took He said some shit too That didn't make sense You said some shit

That didn't make sense I mean I guess The only time I left I meant the I left the country Oh Yeah That's

You've never been to Mexico Or anywhere Oh Punta Cana Yeah I guess You already said that. Jesus Christ. Fact check. I don't really count that, though.

What's our nerd's name over there? I got to think about it. Sven. Sven. From Iceland. I brought him back with me. He's been living in my garage. Introduce yourself.

Sven. Hello. That's a Sven accent hello I'm deleting beers right now you gotta do your chug bud yeah you do cause we're approaching an hour

are we actually what time is it yeah we're at 58 minutes we can go a little over we had some good content to bring really

cause you said you brought nothing I was thinking about some stuff on the ride over I think oh no let's go for it. We can go longer. Two things. I want to do my own podcast eventually. I have a great idea.

It's the basic idea. I'm not actually going to name it Sunday Scaries, but you've got to film it on Sunday. It's got to be the morning after you go out. It's got to be a rough night. You have a guest every week, and it's the person that went the craziest the night before. I feel like you might be talking to yourself sometimes.

What? I do talk to myself. I don't care. Am I crazy? Fucking call me crazy. But I think I'd bring a girl in. I think it would be Natalie. Other than that, I don't know who I would really bring as a host.

But there's got to be some female energy if you actually want it to take off. Dang, he just shit on your butt. No, you brought in girl guests. You're doing the right thing. I'm saying as a multiple host podcast, if you actually wanted to go out to the whole population, you've got to have a girl involved. I think you do.

And what if you have a girl guest and it's all guys? There's a barrier. I get it. You want to attract all the demographics, but. But here's the other thing. You can't please everyone. That's not my whole idea though. Also, you buy, this is another, I'm going to sound so fat. From fast food, you just cater your favorite entrees.

You make like your own meal out of different fast food options. Oh, you guys did that one. Yes, we did. We did B-dubs, wings, McDonald's, fries, and drinks. Like, that's the meal. And then you got got your guests you got multiple things to talk about share stories from the night before if you want you're looking at me like i'm insane this is my idea though i think it'd be funny i kind of like it yeah you'd have courts i'm like sweating because you're just challenging my idea here here's my i like it i think it would be. Here's the only thing that I see this never happening.

You actually have to set something up the morning after. I know. When your ass wakes up and you're like, I want to do nothing but order food. You'd be like, hold on. Let me set up the cameras, set up the microphones, make sure everyone's in place. The lighting's right. The microphones work. All right, talk.

You'd have to have like a separate room somehow. You would need it permanently set up. That's when the funniest conversation happens, though, I feel like. Yeah. I started this. We were like crying laughing because it's just like so stupid. Like your mind is in this weird space. We live in the night before.

That's why I started this stuff, though, is in college we would – it's the morning after conversations and we literally said – But you said you could never even release them because they were too, like, weird. Yeah, I would never talk to a woman again. You'd be hung over creating it and editing it and you wouldn't want to go through the trouble. Well, you can edit it the next day, but yeah. Yeah, fair enough. But no, it's like – that's how it started.

We were like, these conversations are hysterical. It would be fun if we had a podcast. And we like six guys that wanted to do i'm like oh six would be a great conversation trying to have something like you can hear clearly and six guys talking over each other was hard i was like that's i was like oh i want to do this i do feel like every like white kid like thinks they'd make a good podcast. Exactly. Everyone is doing this. There have been so many Sundays where I'm like, damn it, I wish I had this recorded because I would be crying laughing if I was listening to it. But at the same time, half of me is like, I wish I had it recorded. The other half is, no, this is just for me.

Yeah. To be able to draw the line is a good thing. That's why I don't like concerts where you take your phone out. Not everyone needs to see what you're doing or hear what you do. There is a line between... I completely agree with that.

There is a line between sharing... I think this is funny sharing certain stories and talking. Yeah. This, for me, is just an event.

This is how I start my weekend. Come over and drink beers. But I'm not sharing the dirty details of my life. I'm not sharing like the dirty details of my life I'm not like oh today I broke up with

so and so or I'm diagnosed with this and like I did this today I ate this like no not everyone needs to know

everything you did that's not ripping off like I still like the idea of like Sunday Scaries I'm saying this it's gonna be but it's gonna be

fucking hard to do. Because trying to. Are you drinking a warm beer? Oh, you're going to talk about it. I was like, okay, man. We have like six, seven ice down right now. You need a whole cooler. That is a good point.

I think if the camera was out, like you would filter yourself. Like, you know what I mean? Yeah. It wouldn't be the same conversation because you're just like. The whole reason why it's so hilarious is you can just say like you know what i mean yeah it wouldn't be the same conversation because you're just like the whole reason why it's so hilarious is you can just say whatever you're thinking exactly you have like that beer brain where you're not thinking about it so it's like 10 times more funny because it's like everyone's in this dumb mind space and just kind of and the thing is too though is like you you can always record and just not release and

then when you went but no well i, literally all it is is hitting. If you had one camera and it's just like you and Cortez sitting on beanbag chairs. Cortez would be the guy. Kyle would be sweating looking at me because I have this hour-long footage of his blackmail on him 24-7. It's like, that's weird. It's tough. It's tough. Cortez would be the most frequent guest.

When I started this. I was thinking about, I would make him a co-host. Yeah. It's like the craziest fucking – You're already going to be there. You might as well help us with it. No, it's – that was hard when I first started this. Having guests that have like serious jobs that they can't have, even if like I'm like, hey, man, I just started this.

Maybe 50 people in total between everything is going to see this like i can't risk like saying anything that we know is funny that could jeopardize my career or something like that it's like well and like in my head i'm like this is supposed to be my career this is stand-up and all that stuff so i'm like i don't give a flying fuck yeah but other people do that tough. How much do you think it would actually affect? Well, I have, like, I want my buddy Connor

on really bad and he wants to go into, like, public office. Yeah. I'm not going to be the one that, like, Connor's running for governor of Colorado

and it's like, hmm, he was on his friend's podcast in 2021 and he said this about blacking out in college. And to be honest, if he does, this is going to get clipped like, what'd you do in 2021 and he said this about blacking out in college and to be honest if he does this is going to get clipped like what'd you do in 2021 um sorry connor in advance um but yeah

it depends on like what profession they're in and if they're trying to get a job like if they're trying to get like a higher level job that once they get it doesn't matter but they do high background checks and you google your name like you google your name now you'll probably show up on that episode for attending a lisp you will show up for this now yeah i don't care yeah i don't know i really don't care all right i think it's time i do like what you're saying though about like limiting the phone like the phone usage like just being present. Like, I'm huge about that. I would rather, yeah, I would rather live through your eyes, not your phone. Actually, yeah, never mind. I'm not going to time you because I'm on my phone.

I'm going to be fucking present. That's exactly what I'm talking about, dude. That's exactly what I'm talking about. Can I time you and put you on my story? I got you. That looks so my story? I mean, you need to know. It looks so cool. That was actually a... That was like a thing. I don't know if you're going to film or not timing.

It was not a big deal. The clock is fine. Who gives a fuck about the clock? But you're just going to film it. No, I got called on that by Connor. And I normally never do this. We're like, let's... I want to film us doing something stupid. And he's like, and I normally never do this. We're like, let's film us doing something stupid.

Yeah. And he's like, put the fucking phone away. Like, don't be that. I'm like, and it hit me. I was like, I've never done that before. Why did I even try and do that? And I was like, I was like upset at myself. That was gross. All right. This needs to happen.

When do we start the timer? When he punches it? Yeah. Once you turn the key. When I put it up. When you turn the key, I think, because there's not real beer coming out. All right.

That was a slower one for you. I spilled half on my leg, too. I think that beer was almost like, it was deceiving. That was a slower one for you. I spilled half on my leg, too. I think that beer was almost like, it was deceiving. That was long. You turned it back, and it looked like it was gone instantly, and then everything came. I spilled all over myself. That is a good point, what you're saying, though.

The first time I saw that, do you remember we were watching that Nets game in Shawano? Everybody had their phones out before KD had that last possession. Oh, yeah. Where he had his foot on the line. Yeah. You watched that game, obviously, right? Yeah. That's Bucs game seven.

Dude, my phone is nowhere to be, I don't even know where my phone is during those moments. That's such, like, literally on the TV, you could see everyone pulling their phones out. They're like,

I want to, like, catch this moment on my phone, but it's like. Why? You're not going to go watch it again. Yeah. Do you just want to. A thousand people are going to post it.

That, like, House of Hoops will repost one person. Yeah. Other than that, why wouldn't you want like the actual memory for yourself?

You watch it yourself. Yeah, it's... I don't know. The problem is it's social media in general where you have people want to capture it because they want to post it

to say they saw it. Whereas you could just... That's so backwards. Where you could literally... It's so backwards because you're saying you saw it but you didn't see it. Yeah. You saw it through your you could just, where you could literally, it's so backwards because you're saying you saw it, but you didn't see it. Yeah.

You saw it through your phone. You already, you're already seeing it through a TV. Now you're recording a TV with your phone. Yeah. It's, you're just adding layers to seeing something that is actually, well,

even worse than what you're saying. You're saying people taping a TV, like people in the Brooklyn stadium. Oh yeah. That is even worse. Yeah. You see all the flashlights. You're fucking there. You paid thousands of taping a TV. People in the Brooklyn Stadium. Oh, yeah. Even worse. You see all the flashlights. You see everything. You paid thousands of dollars to see that.

To record it on your phone. Hey, man, I'll send you the video tomorrow. No, people just want to look like they had more fun than they actually did. I know. That's why my two favorite activities, going out golfing, my phone is not present. That was the thought I had. I was just thinking as I was driving over. There was two things I was thinking about.

Do you guys think that golf is becoming a more popular sport? Or is it becoming more popular because we're of age to play golf? You know what I'm saying? Yeah. That's a good question. Think on that for a second. The second thing I was thinking was... Totally forgot what I was saying? Yeah. That's a good question. Think on that for a second. The second thing I was thinking was, totally forgot what I was just going to say.

What a fantastic moment. So we'll answer the first question. I think it's becoming a more popular sport. Just remember, let me cut you off quick. Yeah. Well, my two favorite things, obviously, going out, golfing, phone not being present. How do you guys try to limit using your phone outside of activities where you don't use it you know what i mean what i was just about to say what do you mean

like silencing it do not disturb like keep it in your pocket like i feel like the natural instinct is to like whenever you get a notification like check your phone like you got to see what someone was saying to you and then you're not like present what you're doing like how do you got to see what someone was saying to you and then you're not like present in what you're doing. Like how do you try to change that? Or like how have you changed that? See, for me, I've actually never really like had to fight it because I don't want – my mentality is I think no one ever actually cares because I don't care. Yeah. So like I don't post on – like the reason I post on stuff now is for this. Yeah.

And it's like business stuff. My personal account, don't do it because like, the reason I post on stuff now is for this. Yeah. And it's like, business stuff. My personal account, don't do it. Because I could do something fun all weekend. Mm-hmm. And I could have,

like, I don't take pictures, so I don't have much to post. But I'm like, I could post it, and like, I don't think anyone cares because everyone else

posts pictures of what they did all weekend. Exactly. And no one cares. And I don't care. Like, that group picture you took with everyone at the lake house this weekend. Yeah.

Cool. Like don't get me wrong. I'm glad I'm in it. And we documented that we're there, but let's be honest. I'm not going to look at that picture until like that one random day you go through your phone with like your friend when you're hammered at like three o'clock.

Like, I just don't care. So like, it's, it's never on my mind. Like even when I golf, because I'm with the people I want to be with. Exactly. That's my point. I'm with the people I want to be with. So it's like, I don't care so like it's it's never on my mind like even when I golf because I'm with the people I want to be exactly that's my point with the people I want to be with so it's like I don't like if I get a notification it'll be like if I look at it okay and if it's something drastic sure otherwise I'm

where I want to be yeah the people who are constantly on their phone in my head it's a telltale sign that they don't, they either are with people they don't want to be or they're doing activity they don't want to do. Yeah, they're not comfortable in the situation. I try not to take it out of my pocket, but like, ever since, honestly, Nashville, when I lost my phone, like, I didn't have it the whole way home for the last two days.

It was like, it sucked at first, obviously, but everything's on there, but at the same time it was like nice, just a, I was like, alright, I fucking lost it, but like, these next two days that we're here you're unplugged yeah i'm like let's just enjoy it with these people i'll worry about it when i get back and i did but like that really helped and then like going up to like cabins like you said like yeah you have no service yeah i just leave my phone in the cabin so i don't a drop in the lake or lose it again and then they take those pictures i'm like all right whatever but then i'm like i don't have

my phone i'm enjoying it send it to me when we get back and i'll have it anyways like yeah i i don't really care that's why i like bringing an actual camera up to those places because then people are like excited for a picture like a disposable camera kind of thing no like one of these oh one of these and i just put it on i'd be like you break it you buy it yeah but after but like literally anyone take it take pictures and just like but just like take legit like candids kind of thing like you grab it and you take a picture put it down and we go back to doing things

not like hey we need to do it because I'm snapchatting my friend and I want to show him I'm having a good time that way like you do that then two weeks later wherever you get time you sit down you just go through the pictures and be like oh this was sick the best part with the camera for me is is you can't send it to anyone right away. Yeah, you have to wait.

You take it and you're like, now what? You know what's next? Go have fun. Go back to what you're doing. Go back to what you're doing. I'm all for capturing a moment. Love pictures, hate photo shoots. It's stupid.

Yeah. I just, I've never had that problem. Trust me, if I'm home and I'm on the couch I'm scrolling on my phone those moments when you are bored when you are just kind of like it's a slow day at work and you're like scrolling on fucking Facebook for 10 minutes like how do

you stop that from happening that's what I mean like I'm not like on my phone walking around 24 7 when I'm doing fun shit my phone's nowhere to be seen but it's one of those things of like just the day to day like how do you avoid that I mean that one's tougher i think i also don't feel as bad if it gets to a point where it's like during the week and i know i could be doing something i'll get upset with myself but for the most part like if i'm scrolling on my phone it's usually

because i know i have the time to do it and I have nothing else to do. What's the difference between you could not be on your phone and be like, okay, I just watched TV and said, what's the fucking difference? You're probably getting more on your phone. Honestly, you're probably getting more on your phone. Honestly, you read an article or something or some trend and then you got a joke

to tell or maybe you know what WEC means or where ICE is and for the next time you're on your friend's podcast in the garage but no it's we all use it too much and we're fully addicted to it like especially when like the when you see people who have if we stop talking right now and there weren't microphones in front of us and one of us looked away instantly someone probably like yeah yeah like how do i how do I entertain myself for the three seconds that I wasn't? That's bad.

And that, I think, we all need to work on. It's disgusting when I get those updates. They're like, yeah, your screen time this week has gone up 18%. To nine hours. I'm like, dude, I was already at five, six hours. I don't need any more than that. You think you sleep for eight hours or whatever. Nine hours on your phone, that's all of your day you have yeah you're awake for five hours you're like fuck i mean i've worked eight hours today right yeah that makes 25 hours

maybe the earth is flat oh god here we go no um okay we're 15 over. Is there anything else you wanted to? I think the Olympics sucked. Okay, so we're going to final question. Yeah, I didn't even watch them, so I have nothing to say. Well, that's what I'm saying. Neither did I in, like, the time difference, everything.

It's like. The time difference, no fans. Yeah. Yeah, the Olympics to me were. It was too much controversy, too much woke shit, too much... I don't know.

It wasn't Olympics. It was just politics, COVID, and time difference. You're watching it on a replay when it happened live. And you already have the tweets. It's like the sports movies. I know how this ends.

Why the fuck would I watch this? Yeah, exactly. So it seems if you weren't on your phone, you wouldn't know. It's like the sports movies. I know how this ends. Why the fuck would I watch this? Yeah, exactly. So it seems if you weren't on your phone, you wouldn't know. It's true. So moral of the story is Iceland is to the right and up. Stay the fuck off your phone. A lot of meat comes from pigs. And don't go to Cabo.

Don't go to Cabo, yeah. No cocaine from the beach. What else? Weck is a roast beef. Weck is Arby's. Weck is Arby's. Weck has the wheats. What? Excuse you?

And pigs have a lot of meat. Yeah. No, just one set of ribs. Just one. Like left side ribs, right side nothing. And I love pig butter. Jack eats ass. I eat ass.

I eat ass. Okay. We have to end this with a semi-serious thing. Not really. Okay. Jack eats ass I eat ass okay we have to end this with a semi-serious thing not really okay every

so this is season two every person season two has gotten this question okay when are your your May and then my birthday

or what yeah right yeah and then when are you October okay so you'll have a little

more time. You'll have a little less. Before your next... Unless you can get it done. What do you mean? Why would he... Before your next birthday. He's got less time. What do you mean? It's in two months. Yeah, so I'm giving him more because it's in two months. Unless he can get it done

in the two months. He has a year in two months. Oh, okay. Gotcha. Oh, it's not bad it's it's pretty easy um well we'll see um but before i turned 25 i told myself on new year's i have to the stand-up has to start like kobe can't be an excuse anymore you just do it and i did it was awesome love it we'll see if I get to it tonight but whatever what is something