Fat Chance Podcast - Ep.61 - Devin Blake
Episode Date: September 1, 2022Would you believe he moved from LA to Wisconsin for comedy? ...
Transcript
Discussion (0)
how's that i don't know try it again one two three yeah good enough brica braca
if i gotta you could play skiing while we do this if you really wanted to
i don't really want i want to get back to doing these on fridays
because i feel not like i like drinking during these and just drinking on Tuesday seems off to me.
You seem like a pretty prolific drinker though.
I'm not bad.
Am I bad, Jake?
Yeah.
I wouldn't say bad, but I mean, how many are you going to drink tonight?
Two or three?
At least three.
I mean, we're going to be here for an hour.
Yeah.
I mean, but you can shake that off.
You're young, right? Let's talk about that your youth my youth my dwindling youth 26 jake how old are you
25 25 26 we're at the point where we kind of just we're young for sure yeah but i want to forget
like i forget sometimes that i'm 26 like 25 was like a
milestone that i didn't want to reach and so i'm like i'm just 25 you're good are you hitting the
buttons yeah i accidentally hit up and down yeah it's not a big deal um what's the difference
though what do you mean you forget that you i just forget that you're 25 like when he paused
right there he thought about it yeah yeah he's, I don't know where I'm at.
Yeah, I had a friend for a whole year that was saying the wrong age.
His own age?
Yeah.
Jesus.
Yeah, no, 26, I didn't like.
This is the one I liked the least, turning.
But that's a very 26 thing to say.
Yeah, because you're over the hump to 30 in your 20s.
There's so many other bigger, more excruciating homes.
Oh, yeah.
30, 31, 32.
Everything from here on out.
Yeah.
You're just inching closer.
I mean, you've what's the.
I think it's like, yeah.
What's where you're like you enter into a new medical demographic where it's like 26?
Yeah, no, I just got kicked off my-
Jake is young and vigorous.
There's nothing wrong with his prostate.
Well, no, that's the thing.
At 26, you get kicked off your parents' insurance if you're on it.
So I had to go through that process.
I got boned by that, actually.
that process i got boned by that actually i had uh my dad gave me the number to this insurance agent and just called him he's like i sound old yeah you already sound really old yeah but i called
him and he's like all right i'll take care of it just tell me what you make what you want kind of
thing like i don't know what i want here's what i make because all right here's the cheapest plant
like do you plan on getting hurt anytime soon i'm like i don't plan on getting hurt but he goes all right we'll apply
to this it was a great it was under 200 a month that's a lot is it in obamacare or is it i have
no idea what i have that's the thing i'm paying for something and i i don't think i'll ever use
it well that's uh can your dad help me?
I mean, because, like, my wife and I have Obamacare.
Well, we have Anthem Blue Cross.
Did you think we'd be talking about this?
No, but I'm not even – well, I got screwed.
But Anthem Blue Cross, that's what I thought about going through it first.
I have something – I think gold's in it.
Well, that's – you know, every carrier has like tears and so there's like
anthem blue cross silver anthem blue cross gold all that shit oh yeah but so you don't know who
your carrier is no man pull out your where's your insurance card jake who's your insurance to be
honest my insurance card my insurance card it said i should have got one in the mail maybe no i don't get i don't know i know they're taking my money though yeah get this that they get right
yeah so the first one i applied to my god this is my insurance it's like a hundred and it would
have been like 160 bucks and then 20 for like extra like hey if i get a freak accident it's
completely covered yeah i'm like for 20 bucks
a month yeah if i for some reason get into an accident something like that one too many land
sharks one too many land sharks yeah and then fall off my surfboard but i get a call back from
the insurance agent a week later he goes hey you got denied like for what he goes, I don't know. You have to call them.
Did you lie about any, like, your family history?
I go, no.
He goes, okay, well, like, let me know what they say.
So I have to call them, and they have to release to me why I have no insurance. And the lady goes, so apparently you have alcoholic gastritis.
I go, what's that? She goes, I don't know. I just read the documents. So I have alcoholic gastritis. I go, what's that?
She goes, I don't know.
I just read the documents.
So I have to Google it.
It says my stomach lining bleeds because I drink too much.
Oh, God.
How'd they figure that out?
And why is that the way you find out?
I don't have it, though.
I never in my life have I been diagnosed with that.
So here's the
thing here's the thing is they'll routinely just deny people coverage like
to make it if they want to like up your monthly coverage or like take something
like Medicare or Medicaid like you know the things that you qualify if you have
like a disability yeah they just routinely without reason deny you because they
figure uh it'll make it more people will wash out if they do that fair no they coded me wrong so
there so it's just a mistake yeah and you know how hard it is to get that change so hard that
i've given up yeah i'm like fuck it i have alcoholic and i know what appointment it is
i went in because i thought i had i did a country music festival um just like went to it all week and i got hit in the head so i thought
i had a concussion we did we were dumb we did the like slap game so like my friends hit me like
three times as hard as i could open hand they're like you don't have a concussion like it would be
a closed fist if you need i'm like cool and then i walked out of there like you probably are anxious
that's why your head hurts um because you thought you had a concussion i literally like ease of mind
walked out of there totally fine you're the least anxious person i know or is that like a mask
let's talk about anxiety no there's like there's some things i'll get like okay antsy about but no
you know no reason do i have anxiety or depression or any of that? Like, I feel pretty good. But the PA or whatever it was that coded me coded as alcoholic gastritis.
You have to have specific tests done to be able to code some of that.
Like, it's illegal to do that.
I Googled this lady's name because they gave me the name of the person who diagnosed me with it you apparently
nurses can get like five star reviews she has all ones yeah the top three saying i can't believe
she has a license to practice medicine uh what a bummer i'm sorry you're it's now i pay twenty
dollars more for insurance with way less cover she really screwed screwed you. She did a lot. Oh, that's
nice. That's nice. Yeah, I have
these lights in my room that I could use for better
lighting in here. I mean, this
works. That's nice and soft. The TV works.
Yeah, skiing. You want to play skiing? No,
I've never played it.
You just move the red dot. Yeah.
Where's Jake going? He's going to go eat in his room.
Jake, we're bonding.
Do what you want. I don't want to force you into it, but you're a good...
He's been...
He's been on...
How many episodes have you been on?
Three.
You're a good go-to.
He's the episode that Selena Gomez found.
Selena Gomez found an app.
Yeah.
Okay.
She found an app.
She found a clip from one of our episodes, and then...
What happened to it? He also... She found a clip from one of our episodes, and then he also,
I think you did a pocket Skittles thing once or, like, brought.
That was such an inside joke with maybe the four people that were listening to this at the time.
Well.
But, yeah.
When I have someone, I'm like, Jake, I need something.
Well, Jake's a good energy.
You're a good vibe good vibe you wiped the microwave
down and i don't i don't think i've ever seen i'm facing the other direction never seen an adult do
that except like realtors he's trying to like stage a house so i don't know you you told me you uh
prepared me to walk in your apartment by saying it's such a dude apartment i'm just picturing like
cum and shit that's what i've been told like jake's like slowly wiping down the inside of
a microwave but i i think i followed i mumbled with what it's pretty clean i think this is a
pretty clean apartment this is a beautiful apartment yeah it's just what i've been told
like when the group of guys it's like it does i mean the whole building is industrial yeah and
like yeah like 90 like you picture like um that scene in the Matrix where he follows the rabbit.
You know what I mean?
There's like techno music and stuff like that.
I've seen it once.
Jake, you know what I'm talking about?
The guy who's on mescaline.
This is where he lives.
This kind of apartment.
No, but when we had the guys over here.
This is the apartment of a very like high level mescaline dealer
mescaline yeah what is mescaline like a hallucinogen oh that sounds fun well you use it to treat
alcoholic gastritis
well i don't have that so i don't need it how do you get it that messed up it's just like one
like hey had I came in
The appointment said
Came in for a headache
Alcoholic gastritis
Well
Well but also
What a weird thing to say
Like you probably have anxiety
She probably tried to put that down
Because it's due to the A
Who knows
I mean I'm surprised
I wasn't prescribed Adderall
Or anything
Just calm the fuck down
And get out of here
But
Actually Adderall does Have you ever taken Adderall or anything. I just calm the fuck down and get out of here. But actually Adderall does.
Have you ever taken Adderall?
Very often.
Is this an everyday thing for you?
No, but so I was prescribed it.
So I have terrible anxiety and depression.
Okay.
Like it's pretty deep inside me and have taken.
So about six or seven years ago i started seriously taking uh ssris which is
like kind of like the standard antidepressant yeah and then started taking this stuff called
gabapentin for anxiety and it was originally used to treat uh like nerve pain like neuropathy and stuff like that and they found it had like
this off-brand use for anxiety uh and that when i started taking it was like life-changing um
and it like totally like suppressed anxiety and i was able to kind of like
i don't know went from like i i described it as like Dorothy going from black and white to color.
Because I went from like everything either being causing anxiety or not causing anxiety to like, oh, there's so many things that have nothing to do with me or my anxiety.
That's good.
Yeah, it was life changing.
But then a couple years after that, I was like always feeling like lethargic and tired all the time so i was
like maybe uh i also need a stimulant like adderall so i talked a fly-by-night psychiatrist
to prescribe me adderall it was so easy um and then started taking it but then like
very quickly started getting like really insane,
like backaches by the end of the night.
Like it was just like tensing me up.
And then you were getting depressed cause you, well, also it also was, yeah.
And then you got anxious cause you're getting depressed again.
Well, I was also, I mean, it really is because it's, it's, it's the way it works is, you
know, it does amp up. It can very much amp up your anxiety.
So I didn't really take, I took that for like a couple weeks.
But my brother-in-law takes Adderall or, you know, some version of it.
And so I will, every time I see him, I say, can I have a yum yum pill?
And I will take one.
And just for like a day, you know, it's like cocaine light.
It's just like, it's very kind of like.
It's diluted coke.
Yeah.
I just like, I mean, really, truly.
I mean, it like, you know, focuses you and gives you energy and gives you like.
What do you do on it when you just take your yum yum pill?
I mean, just like take care of my kid.
A little concerned about the other 99% of the days.
Take care of my kid and like, you know.
Just really well.
Really well, really focused.
I put his seatbelt on really, really well.
No, I mean, it's really, no, at this point now it's just to like, you know,
it feels good to not be super tired all the time because my
kid yeah so wait so that answer your question no now i'm like how many pills are you on
okay so i take i take two different medications every day but i take nine pills a day it's three well i take 30 30 milligrams of the antidepressant
which usually comes in 10 milligram pills okay why can't i just make it one pill i know
insurance they want they want more money i'm sure um and then i take two pills three different times a day for the gabapentin.
So I take 600 milligrams of gabapentin three times a day.
That seems like a lot.
It is a lot.
It's the max you can take.
Have you ever considered taking just two and seeing if you can naturally wean yourself off and be okay with it?
With anxiety.
Because there's got to be some placebo in it.
You take it and you're like, I'm going to be good today.
Yes and no.
So I stopped taking the antidepressant.
I just kind of started going cold turkey on it.
Because I'm sick of taking pills every day.
And also, the SSRI does make you a little more sluggish.
Sorry, can you cut that part out?
I just vomited in my mouth.
We cut nothing out.
That one's for you, Selena.
She probably looked at this profile.
She's like, I got too many views.
I can't take it down.
So I'm, you know, I need, I don't have any energy to spare.
So I stopped taking it.
And yeah, I just like, if you, it's called titrating, you titrate up or titrate down
when you like slowly increase or decrease the dosage.
And you really got to do that under a doctor's care it's really stupid to do it the way i was doing it um but with
the thing just doing roller coaster highs and lows yeah not roller coaster but i mean county
fair roller coaster yeah okay yeah um it's a circle and a few whoos but with the
gabapentin i really uh you build up a tolerance and i feel like i've built up a tolerance but i'm
at the max dose and so i talked to my doctor uh and he was like just take a second pill what no
he was like you i was like like, can we adjust one?
Can I like stop for a little bit?
And like, you know, like a weed break.
Like you stop for a little bit and then get your tolerance back.
And he was like, no, what we could do is add a third medication.
I was like, I do not want to do that.
That just sounds pricey too.
Well, it depends on what kind of insurance you have.
Well, mine isn't great because I have alcoholic gastritis.
Yeah, I'm sorry about that.
Yeah, I didn't.
Was I not sympathetic enough about that?
So I don't know what.
I don't like being on pills.
I don't like my kid seeing me in the morning taking pills.
You know what I mean?
Does he know what you're doing, though?
He doesn't know. I'm sure he just thinks it's candy or something but like uh you know i just like it'd be better if it wasn't part of my life although you know
it is pretty deep inside me pretty deep inside my family like yeah my mom my grandma my my siblings
inside me pretty deep inside my family like yeah my mom my grandma my my siblings so uh you know i exercise there there are a lot of studies that say like exercising is about as effective as an
ssri um i do that religiously so i'm good yeah uh so yeah i don't know I mean it's ever changing ever growing but I mean that was a big part big
part of why I hated Los Angeles was just like everything was like so overwhelming and intense
and like in your face and it's not you know it's I do feel so much better being in a place like
this a little more mellow here it's I've never been to LA but I can assume it's i do feel so much better being in a place like this a little more mellow here it's
i've never been to la but i can assume it's a lot just the surrounding it's the surroundings the
pace the people like i don't want to be one of those people it's like oh fuck la because
you know a lot of my loved ones are still there and i have a lot of you know i grew up there but
uh it just does not it's not the right speed for me.
No, I can imagine it just feels cleaner here.
I want a camera just on you eating, watching us. I would watch that.
That would be my favorite podcast.
Just have you in the corner.
We can come back and forth between the house.
We just got a J cam in the corner.
Is that the honey mustard chicken?
Cut to the J cam.
Is it as good the second
day no now did you make the chicken yourself or is it like pre-made yeah see this is not a typical
dude apartment but just this dude apartment where we honey glaze our chicken yeah no the only reason
i said this because that's what we got from my group of friends that came here like two weeks
ago they're like this is such a bachelor pad.
No.
I mean, this is like.
I think it's an upgraded bachelor pad.
I mean.
That's nowhere.
It is a statement in itself.
Yeah.
It's all the art is just.
What kind of art would you put up?
Whatever we had.
Whatever you have.
Yeah.
We're thinking just like four things there.
Just big ones, center them.
Now, is this drywall?
Yeah.
Okay.
Honestly, the stairwells there, we could just break that down and expand the living room a little bit.
But you could put some nice...
Stadium seating.
Yeah, stadium seating.
I don't know what we're going to do. We probably honest truth nothing will ever touch the walls in this apartment i put that one up right there the day we moved in
because i was like if we don't hang this like this is the coolest thing and i was mad he didn't hang
it up in his apartment before like this is the coolest thing we have here hanging up otherwise
it'll never get hung up and there was this was a show apartment so there was already a nail in the wall which is the only
reason it's hung up there because there's no other nails besides that and it's off center there we
block in half the window so that might be the only thing that stays on our wall we even bought
the stuff to hang things up like the anchors and stuff yeah we have it all put you could even hang up there in the concrete get some tap guns in there yeah well we could just put that
giant heilman sign up there i don't know what we're gonna do if you were to get a poster for
stand-up comedy what would the poster be that's because i we want to do like our interests it's
like music movies comedy stuff like that um that's because I think it'd be weird to have just like a comedian up there.
Well, what I've seen is like pictures.
Like, is there a picture of you performing where you like it was a really important performance for you?
See, that's the other thing, too, is I'm not going to put myself on my wall.
I don't think I.
In the living room? No way. I think that's the other thing, too, is I'm not going to put myself on my wall. I don't think. In the living room?
No way.
I think that can be tastefully done.
If I was, like, good.
Come on.
You got to believe in yourself on some level.
No, I do.
I do.
But, I mean, if it's our living room, and let's say we have four posters.
And Jake Scott.
It's like, Odessa.
I don't know.
Shawshank.
And then you at the laughing tap? Me at the laughing tap. And then. I don't know, Shawshank. And then you at the laughing tap?
Me at the laughing tap.
And then, I don't know.
Scarface.
Scarface.
Which one isn't like the other?
Like that just doesn't fit.
I think if it's coming, I get what you're saying.
Yeah.
But it's like if it's coming from the heart and it's like meaningful to you.
Or like if it's not a picture of you, like a flyer of a show yeah see that i could do that in my own room okay so you're talking
about here here yeah is it like in your living room would you want just a picture of like a
giant i'm talking like three feet by five feet just you you. No, of course not.
Yeah.
If it was like a podcast studio and this is like where you constantly do stuff.
Right, right, right.
Yeah.
But what would you do for comedy?
Because I think like that's a big interest of mine.
To represent comedy?
Yeah.
A microphone seems pretty lame.
It is very lame.
Then I would do the same thing, but for like your favorite comedian.
I don't know.
I think the old school.
Like a flyer, though?
Like it can't just be a picture of them performing?
It could be.
I think I love, and this is obviously because I love his comedy, too, but I love the old school pictures of Carlin performing.
of carlin performing where it's like you know the phase where he went from uh being cleaner kind of goofier to kind of like the bearded counterculture guy yeah like right around that phase i i think is
really just a cool time for in his stand-up and in stand-up in general those pictures always got
to me but that you know whatever your version of that is i think
you could so then that for me just yeah i i like that but then i think of the other four pictures
would have to be like live performances of the concert or whatever like stills sure yeah just
gotta fit i just i gotta we gotta decide what we're gonna do we're never gonna do this that's
the thing is like we're never gonna put what are jake's the thing. We're never going to put it. What are Jake's interests? Jake, you left your spot.
Jake's like music, Molly, and movies, yeah.
Movies, music, movies.
And finance stuff.
I don't know.
Those could all be like performance.
You could do like a music performance.
Yeah.
Who would you do for your music person?
Odessa.
Odessa?
I'd do Midland.
Two very different styles of music.
Wait, who's Odessa?
Odessa?
Is that like the folk singer?
No, like he is.
But not like laser beam music.
But like kind of laser beam music.
Okay, laser beam music.
The tapestry of Jake just gets more complicated the more I learn.
Jake, are you going to have a beer or are you just drinking tea?
What are you drinking?
Do you want a beer?
Why do you got to be like that?
I mean, yeah.
I have one.
Okay.
We're in the fridge.
It doesn't take long.
Doesn't it feel weird on a Tuesday?
Like, this is where I, like, one.
Why did you switch from Friday to Tuesday?
Because I have reschedulings.
So, like, I like to do them on the weekends, and then we do this.
Like, I used to do it when I lived at my mom's when I started this.
I would do them in the garage
and i would have my friends over we would drink and then i would just go right in the high note
and do an open mic and then i'd have fun that's good and it like first starting you have like
two beer buzz you don't feel that bad bombing on stage um it also was just like that was your
night like you started early got off work did that so why did that stop
um trying to schedule one i don't live as close to those friends anymore two i don't like asking
people to do this i ran through all the people i like know and like here for the most part
like friend wise and now with the comedian thing is like it it's, I'm trying to be better at asking people to do things.
I just feel like,
wait,
so this was,
how long have you been doing this?
I started,
this was 2020 into 21.
The first episode was filmed on new year's.
And it was you talking to your friends yeah it was just
like it was like five of us just with microphones sharing them in minnesota just passing back and
forth and then i would do it in the garage it was just my friends and then when i started doing this
i started having comedians on that i enjoyed talking then i started having comedians on then
having comedians i enjoyed talking to and i having comedians on then having comedians i enjoyed
talking to and i used to do it every week and then i was like they're just terrible for a while
and i was like i need to have people i enjoy on right and it's kind of worked out but it's also
made me more lazy with like not putting stuff out because i've learned recently being consistent with stuff has very much benefited me yeah yeah so
I also had a different show before that yeah it was me and one of my friends
it was just us two every time and then he said he didn't wasn't having as much fun
I say he got a girlfriend and well he did get a girlfriend and then it was just like I'd rather
have sex than talk to you in your mom's garage.
I'd rather talk to Jake than have sex.
Am I the first person to say that?
In the world?
Yeah.
In the world.
I like how you had to add that.
Will you be the only one to say it?
Probably.
I don't know. We need a camera. I'm going to say it? Probably. I don't know.
We need a camera.
I'm going to get a fourth one.
Just you now have to be here for every episode and eat for an entire hour.
A really complicated meal.
What's the dessert now?
I made cookies this weekend.
Oh, yeah?
What kind of cookies?
Chocolate chip.
Do you want one?
I should have one? All right. If Jake says yeah. Yeah. We'll. Do you want one? I should have one?
All right, if Jake says yeah.
Yeah.
We'll have Jake get you one.
We'll have Jake grab you one when he's done eating his.
I'll have half of one.
No, because Avery and I do a thing now where we get high and bake and record it.
Yeah.
And so I kind of got into baking a little.
Like, when I'm looking for episodes like because i'm like i need a easy
baking idea chocolate chip cookie seems overdone but like every once in a while you see one you're
like that looks like a good cookie and i haven't had a good chocolate chip cookie in a while
and i tried that this weekend these are massive cookies by the way do you have you uh baking's
great have you ever uh i hate baking but you said you liked it. No, I've been like, I got into it, but I hate it.
Like, I like actual cooking better.
I see.
Because baking is exact.
Right, it's like a science.
Yeah, it's a science.
Whereas cooking, you kind of have like,
you know, like, oh, I'm going to add a little extra this.
Yeah, and at the end, if it's not right, you can.
You're like, oh, fuck it.
Yeah.
Yeah.
You improvise.
It's like stand-up.
You go in with a recipe, and sometimes someone heckles you.
That's a good metaphor, yeah.
Sometimes you just throw an extra onion in there.
I'm like, this is pretty good.
Yeah.
Yeah, because some people have to be, like, exact, and, like, every word for word is the same.
And then some people are a little bit more like cooking.
You're very much like cooking.
Good. I like that. Lo're very much like cooking. Good.
I like that.
Loosey-goosey.
Just loosey-goosey.
Sometimes it works.
Sometimes it doesn't.
Yeah.
The last couple things I've been doing haven't worked.
But there's nobody who did.
Regardless of style, there's nobody who goes up and it's always working.
No, no, no, no, no, no.
of style there's nobody who goes up and it's always working no no no no i feel like i'm in a little bit of a rut in terms of just like writing i've had like a story come up here
there that i know will get a laugh but in terms of like writing writing i've been a little
a little shitty lately but it is what it is it happens yeah it happens but then something clicks and then
it feels good for a while yeah you just ride that high yes
i gotta get to my second one you've been making noise this entire episode
i think you're gonna like them what kind of chocolate chip cookies do you like
what do you mean like Like chewy versus hard?
Is that what you mean?
I guess, yeah.
Chewy.
Chewy?
Okay, we're good.
Are you going to warm it up at all, Jake?
Yeah.
Cool.
Dang.
This is a great apartment.
Yeah, it's wonderful.
No, I already had half a cookie today.
You still have it.
It was nice.
It was nice.
When I asked you to do this and you're like, what time?
Usually when people say that, they're like, can we get this done early?
The fact that you said 7-3, I was like, thank God.
Yeah, I got to.
Because it gives me time to get home, shower, and eat a little bit and not wolf it down.
Right.
Yeah, I do watch the kid.
Yeah, you do have a kid that you should watch.
Is he with the grandparents or the wife now?
He's with the grandparents or the wife now uh he's with the wife the wife so she had to be on a call and then right when she got done with the call essentially
i took off okay i'm gonna go hang out with at this dude apartment and talking to a microphone
have a few beers yeah please watch the child i know she gets it i mean she's always off doing something she's i've seen both of you
a lot more recently i've seen her a lot more recently yeah she's she has felt bad for not
being uh at enough mics yeah um but again you have a kid yeah but we're trying to figure out a way to
get her wow these look great thank Thank you to both of you.
Now, what kind of chocolate chips are these?
Milk chocolate chip.
No, I mean like they're like chunks.
Oh, yeah.
No, it's an actual bar of like Ghirardelli chocolate.
Oh, this looks great, guys.
All right.
Give us a rating.
Who should bake and just get ratings on it?
Now, when did you make these?
Sunday.
It's Tuesday.
Yeah.
They've been out?
They've been in a plastic bag.
Plastic bags.
This is the kind of cookie you want to eat, like, totally fresh.
Yeah.
But I'm going to give it an eight.
Yes.
I'll take it.
I agree, because I had part of it today.
It's like, you've got to eat it totally fresh.
I had it fresh, a little chewy.
I had like, oh, my God.
And I overcooked them a bit because they were so big.
Still good.
Can't complain.
It's a good milk cookie.
Yes.
It's a great milk cookie.
I like the thinner ones that are a little chewy on the inside,
but they got a little tougher on the outside.
You get like multiple textures and the salt on top.
Yeah.
It's a good move.
That's great.
Yeah.
This is like a good,
like sleepover cookie.
It is.
Does that make sense?
You can put in a sleepover.
Am I sleeping over?
You want to sleep over?
We got,
we can get a few people on this couch.
Are you excited for the showcase in September?
I think it's going to be fun.
I don't have the headliner yet.
Who else is on it?
Who's on it?
Yeah.
It's me, you, and Avery right now.
Basically the people I talk to the most.
And I also think they kind of coincide.
I wouldn't say necessarily styles but
things we talk about i think would flow together pretty well i have an idea for the headliner i'm
not going to say in the air in case it doesn't work out but i think it'd be well then whisper
it to me oh i think that would i think what today? No. Today is the 30th of August.
September 30th.
It's a Friday.
I got him to move it to Fridays, which is nice.
I think it's tough doing shows on Thursdays.
Yeah, you don't want that.
No.
You are wolfing this cookie down.
That's great.
I'm also very hungry.
Yeah.
Did you not eat?
More or less.
I ate the rest of my leftovers.
Otherwise, I would...
No, no, no.
This whole episode is just us feeding you.
Yeah, what's your favorite type of...
Like, if you could have your death row meal,
what is your death row meal?
Well, I think that really puts a lot of pressure on the question.
Are you asking what my favorite food is?
Yeah, it's life or death, really.
Are you asking what my favorite cuisine is or what I would have on death row?
Okay, both.
Give me your favorite cuisine.
I would say probably Mexican.
Okay.
Death row, you get three items and a dessert.
Is that true?
No, that's what I'm saying.
Just to limit it.
Because you can ask for whatever you want on death row.
Right.
Three items and a dessert.
Three items and a dessert.
Drink does not count as the item.
No, I'd probably do like a steak, mashed potatoes and gravy.
French fries.
I think that's pretty in reason.
French fries, mashed potatoes.
So two potatoes and a steak.
What's your dessert?
Tiramisu.
Tiramisu, really?
Mine's hot apple pie and ice cream.
Okay.
That is, in my opinion, the best dessert of all time.
Apple pie and ice cream.
What about you, Jake?
Well, I'm not thinking here, but cheeseburgers, french fries, pizza.
Now, what is your favorite dessert, Jackass?
I'm saying the most common thing is on death row.
That's not what we were asking you.
Pizza?
I don't think I'd ever ask for pizza i would do some form of pasta i don't know
if you're deprived of pizza for like 20 years i think that's a pretty like yeah but i don't
yeah it's an easy thing you fantasize yeah because it's easy to think about
what's your favorite dessert let's start with that
favorite dessert let's start with that chocolate mousse yeah this isn't a dude apartment which is chocolate mousse or crumple it are you in law school jay no
is that connor's yeah he actually connorors went to Denver to go to law school.
Oh, yeah?
Yeah.
He just took the bar.
We don't know if he's passed it yet or not.
He set the bar?
Fingers crossed.
You think he just, like, has the best score?
We asked him.
He goes, it fucking wrecked me.
That doesn't sound like a guy that set the bar.
I don't know what exactly is on that test, but that's what everyone says.
Oh, yeah.
I can't imagine that's a test.
That also seems like I don't know what the test is at all.
I know it's a lot of writing.
I think it's like eight hours for like three days in a row.
Yeah.
But it also has to be such as – do you think it's a subjective thing too though?
Like if there is no – is there a right answer to i don't i've never taken the bar like the questions i ask
i would assume you're gonna argue they're like hey are you this case
well i think either you're providing in relevant information or you're not okay
so are you just something it's like almost like did you read the
book for the book reporter didn't you yeah so you're giving us filler or like just bullshit
is it very very very good or you like this is excellent kind of thing right that's fair
maybe something i think it's um i think it's constructed to make people fail like brilliant people fail the first time i can't imagine taking
it if someone told me i'd take a three look google how long is the bar exam i bet it's different
everywhere because i i there's a kid from my high school i ran into at the bar next door
and actual bar the actual bar next door the brewery and he um he just took he didn't have to take
the bar because you graduate law school in wisconsin you're just legally allowed to
practice in the state of wisconsin now you can't practice outside of wisconsin right what's up
what is it guess you don't have a microphone we just need the answer my guess is it? Guess. Guess. You don't have a microphone. We just need the answer.
My guess is it's like three days for like eight hours a day.
I think it's 12 hours a day for three days.
Oh, okay.
I knew a 12 was in there.
That's still.
Yeah.
That's like so long to be concentrating you have to be in cram i think i would have to take just at least a two hour mental break
i would be a mental midget if i took a six hour exam right now yeah even like on something i definitely like
no but like six hours of law there's so many laws we don't know about and they're making new ones
every year yeah that's what's crazy is like the congress people they just make laws and they add to the pile of laws that we have
does it help anybody i don't think anything really helps anyone i had this conversation
with my girlfriend last night that i truly think nothing really fucking matters like people i
really don't like it does but it doesn't like bear with me before anyone gets upset
i don't even know how i'm gonna address this but people get so upset
and argue over things like religion politics like i i have a rule my mom has to do i won't argue
about religion i won't argue about politics because no matter how aggressive you are with
someone who really wants to argue with you you'll never change your mind it just ends in a heated
debate you can have a conversation i will not have an argument. There's a difference.
But at the end of the day, like, you're going to go home and go to bed and, like, what's going on in the world doesn't affect a lot of people.
Well.
It affects a lot of people.
Are you saying that people's opinions about things don't have a big effect on the world?
Yeah, people's opinions don't have a lot of effect at all.
That's very true.
That's basically what I'm getting with.
Like whatever you can argue,
like this is what I think.
I'm like,
I,
whatever you think is not going to change what I'm going to do tomorrow at
all.
Right.
But are you talking about opinions affecting like policy and laws?
Are you just talking about one person's opinion affecting another
both i guess more so affecting another it's hard to like explain it's a very vague thing i'm trying
to get what you mean but i think that's i think there is uh at the heart of that
like have you ever changed your mind about something? Yeah. And was it because it probably was a slow process
and probably had to do with, like, your experiences changing
and the people you were around were changing
or, like, added to what you were hearing and thinking?
That process takes time and it takes a lot of trust, right?
Yeah.
You have to, like, if somebody's, something's important
and, you know, we have different opinions about it
and somebody is talking to me about it and trying to change my mind,
I have to trust what they're saying.
You know what I mean?
Like, if they're like, let's say, for example,
a black person with Black Lives Matter,
and they're like, you don't get it.
My life is different i've
encountered different things in my i have to trust what you're saying and yeah i that takes
a lot of humility and a lot of um connection with that person so the arguing and like the
arguing online and like the heated debates like in your face i very much agree with you that's i think that's what i'm trying to like i have to word it better from like the arguing is dumb you argue all
you want it's not going to change the fact that this still happens right or this doesn't i think
i think most arguing like that is just people uh not getting off on but people really taking pride in articulating their point of view
rather than changing somebody's mind or uh affecting the thing that they're actually
talking about i think i think the i think this and i think you're wrong like the it's still the
same urge to like dominate and overwhelm the other person yeah um
so i you know i very much agree with you there yeah it's just um like it just i i worded so
much better last night i guess it's i'm out land shark deep i'm gonna i'm down the hole how many
how many what land shark i said i'm a land Landshark dude. I got real confused there.
Well, a Landshark and the neck of one.
These go down so easy.
So easy.
I've never had a Landshark.
Would you like one?
Sure.
Cool.
We're going to get you trying everything here.
I'll get it for you.
Actually, Jake.
I got it.
I got it.
Okay.
The way I describe it, if I could get a beer sponsor sponsorship this is in my top five
top three to be honest i would go in no order but probably order landshark coors light and
what would be a fun one?
I don't know.
Lagosarita.
Lagosarita, yeah.
And Lagos.
I had a new beer.
I stayed till midnight at Laughing Tap on Wednesday last week.
Just me, AJ, and Matt drinking beer.
Shooting shit.
That's a good crew.
It was fun.
I enjoyed it. Yeah.
Yeah. Yeah.
If you had a favorite beer, if you get a sponsored by any beer, you have three.
I gave you two of mine because I can't think of a third.
I'm pretty easy breezy.
I mean, like a lager or a wheat beer.
Anything like that.
You're not going to get a sponsor if you're just like...
Pretty easy breezy.
I mean, Hackershore...
Like a beer or like water.
Hackershore is good.
This is a good one.
Is that how you say it, Hackershore?
I don't know.
That's how I say it.
The P has to be silent there.
It has to be silent.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, no oh no what's that it's another german
wheat beer uh what was it called i don't know heffenweizen i mean that's the type of beer i
again i am so i'm illiterate when it comes to beer but uh yeah any heffenweizen like what kind
of beers this is a lager a lager. A lager. Yeah, lagers are...
I honestly thought lager was just another name for beer.
Yeah, I'm not too fluent on these.
Margaritaville Brewing Company?
Oh, it's Jimmy Buffett's beer.
Really?
Yeah.
It's a less skunky Corona.
Yeah, see?
It is a little skunky, though.
But it's less skunky.
You have a lime?
Jake, do you have a lime?
Damn, what does that mean?
You don't have any?
Oh, yeah, he's going up north
with his parents and girlfriend for how many days?
Three?
Four?
What are the limes for?
All right.
I respect that.
Yeah.
First time I ever got drunk was off of a margarita.
Threw up.
My first time drunk was beer and twisted tea, but, like, not the twisted teas in a can.
This was before twisted teas were in a can.
This was, like, homemade.
This was, like, homemade.
Two bottles.
And this is where I would make it, too, because the first time I drank it, it was two bottles of vodka,
and then you get several things of lemonade.
You get, like, flavored teas, like Arizona teas.
Put it in there, and I was like...
And I never really drank before
up to that point i had half a beer in my life i was going into my senior year of high school
i didn't really drink in high school it's one of the best days of my life it was so fun yeah
yeah you didn't throw up no didn't throw up okay um I came home and one of my buddies stayed sober
It's a good thing. We were in high school
And he drove us home after we got back from the Dave Matthews Alpine Valley concert, okay, and
He dropped me off front of my house. I walked in my dad's sitting on the couch
I am shit hammered and I like just get into the doorway and
i just like i look at him i look to the kitchen he goes anything you want to tell me i go nope
and i went right to the basement i'm like the most obvious i'm wasted yeah could happen just
like whatever and he was pretty cool not to like really yell at me i just went to the basement and
just sat on the couch my didn't even notice my brother was down there playing video games and he goes what are you doing
down here i'm gonna go to bed he goes okay that's fun weirdo yeah uh that's impressive not
barfing the first time i've i've puked the night of drinking i want to say
less than five times in my life.
Okay.
Jake, did you puke the first time?
Yeah.
Smart guys.
I don't...
I hate puking.
I hate it.
Yeah, it's terrible.
Well, some people like
they just
when they get hung over
like I'm going to go pull trig
and just stick their fingers
down their throat
and throw up.
I try and avoid it at all costs.
Last time I actually threw up was our buddy's bachelor party.
I think I ate bad blackberries.
When we were driving back, I, when we got like maybe 30 seconds,
basically where you parked is where we got to.
And I was like, Corey, drive faster.
I'm going to throw up.
I just started sweating bullets.
And then what's unfortunate is, like, when you live in a building,
we've got to take the elevator.
Like, you can't run to your building.
You, like, have to wait for the elevator.
Then you wait in the elevator.
And then you go and lock your door.
And I barely made it.
All I did was just puke up blackberries.
Like, I was, like, coughing up seeds.
And I was like, I'm good.
Did you throw up the first time you drank? Oh yeah right yeah ever so many times and then like fell asleep under my friend's parents car and he had to like walk get me up
and walk me to his bedroom and i was like bumping around in the hallway in the middle of the night. It was a bad scene.
That's good.
I think.
Can't have margaritas.
Really?
Because of that, yeah.
They're my absolute favorite drink.
I guess not margaritas with salt.
I think I've had them a couple times without and it's been okay.
What's that?
With tahini.
Do you not know what tahini is i have a vague idea
of what tahini you want to try to hear yeah give me a little taste of tahini jake grab the tahini
um we'll rim your next drink how about that no let me just let me just taste it it's um
no i have like so after that night of drinking though, um, I didn't feel good
the next morning.
Like my stomach was constant.
It was a two day concert.
So we were supposed to go back and I was like, I was supposed to have so much fun the second
day.
I was like, this is gonna be a great time.
Two days of this.
And the whole time I was like, I just, I can't do anything.
But I couldn't, uh, for the longest time drink red gatorade
my didn't like ice cream trucks used to sell that yes like chamoy candy yeah okay yeah so it was
like a mexican fruit roll-up kind of thing and and then would have tajin sprinkled over it. It's not a bad taste.
No.
I think it's very good with drinks.
Like, you do a jalapeno margarita and that.
Do you like spicy?
I love spicy food.
I don't know, with, like, drinks and, like, salt and alcohol,
I think that experience really soured me on it.
It's amazing.
You have one bad night.
Like I was saying, the Gatorade, it tasted like vodka to me.
I won't drink Red Gatorade to this day.
I also just hate it.
I think it's syrupy.
The sickest I've ever been was I was on a camping trip with a friend.
I don't know if it was their, like, winter cabin or they were renting it.
But we were, like, crawling around in some, like, crawl space, like, up in some attic.
And we found, like, some old, like, kind of, like, emergency food.
And there were, like, two cans of SpaghettiOs.
One was dented and one wasn't.
And I got the dented one and ate it.
And it was a six-hour...
We were in Mammoth in California.
And it was a six-hour car ride from Mammoth to Los Angeles
where my mom lived.
And I was puking the entire time in the back of my
friend's parents van and like just like dry heaving and just like like just for hours and then um
I like that you think the dented can was the problem no okay no no no the the often when
when like if something is tomato based, there's a dent in it.
That's how botulism grows often.
How what grows?
Botulism.
It's like a bacteria that causes food poisoning.
Oh.
It's got food poisoning from SpaghettiOs.
So don't buy dented cans with tomatoes in it.
Yes.
I can't even smell SpaghettiOs now.
That's a good thing.
I don't think you should be eating SpaghettiOs in this day.
It's not like I'm dying to eat SpaghettiOs,
but just on the theme of eating something,
throwing up, and not being able to eat it again.
Oh.
Just emergency food found.
Imagine actually having doomsday bunker food you have to eat yeah
it was like the spaghettis with the meatballs in it too oh so it's like lumpy you can't just
slurp it down you gotta chew i'm almost vomiting thinking about it i've i've said it on here before
we've shared this story on here before but i had a buddy on my 19th birthday, we were drinking in my backyard.
And he came late, and we made burgers and stuff like that.
We just, like, stopped.
After we ate, we put, like, other ones on.
We just stopped cooking them.
And he came.
He's like, all right, I'm going to take a bite of this.
And it was, like, kind of raw.
Yeah.
And he's like, oh, fuck, I'm not going to eat this.
And then he's like, I've got to play catch up.
And it's just, oh, fuck, I'm not going to eat this. And then he's like, I got to play catch up. And it's just guys are dumb.
So he took he picked up the garbage bag that he threw the burger in.
And when he picked it up, all the leftover like beer from the empty cans kind of filled to the bottom.
So he cut the bag and drank that beer from the garbage can with food and stuff in it and we're like dude that's fucking insane and it just didn't hit him right away and then we just kept
drinking that night and it ended up with three of us playing like don't drink and drive like
birrio mario kart drinking game turned into just me playing because i was
hammered the other two were asleep one guy was whispering to my cat for 45 minutes and the guy
who drank garbage beer was puking in my basement bar sink and like you know the drain like a bar
sink in the basement it's like the holes are like pencil wide yeah so he would puke turn the water on and start scooping the vomit
out of the drain and moving it to the side and trying to shove pieces down just all night
he goes i can't drink miller light anymore oh yeah i wouldn't touch a garbage bag anymore yeah
so it was a dumb drinking's fun dumb idea i didn't't like Miller Lite after that either
because I didn't feel good during that night
could have been the burgers
probably the garbage beer
do you get after it ever anymore?
like really drink?
I try to limit my drinking now
to comedy related things.
You're telling me.
And so like,
I've been pretty good about not drinking at home.
Um,
the last time I got like throw up drunk,
wasn't too long ago.
My,
uh,
will be September 30th.
I know.
Joke.
Uh,
my brother-in-law lives with us um because he just recently graduated college yeah from uh
stevens point and uh you know it's a little bit more remote out there
and uh so he's living with us and i love him to death he's living with us. And I love him to death.
He's a lot like me.
He's kind of, like, anxious.
Pretty creative.
Really, you know, interesting guy him tickets to go to like,
you know, Milwaukee Repertory Theater.
There's like a theater that does like,
it was like dueling pianos.
It was a dueling piano show.
So we went and it was like a nice date.
Like we went to like a Thai restaurant
and had a few Thai beers
and then went to this place and had a few cocktails. Then we went to like a Thai restaurant and had a few Thai beers and then went to this place and had a few cocktails then we went to some bar
afterwards had a few cocktails and I was just like really fucked up by the end of
it and I'm pretty yeah I definitely peed in the parking lot and then I think I
came home and vomited yeah and it's just terrible it's
just it's terrible especially if you don't do it drinking is one of those things where if you take
long enough off you you're gonna be screwed i think if you take long enough off of weed
you know once you're high you're like i'm done like you just kind of lose it but if you just start drinking it hits you so quick yeah it hits you so quickly but
with drinking too it takes a little longer yeah but it's also a different feeling like i feel good
i feel real confident it isn't like you're thinking about shit you stop thinking about
everything and you're just let's just keep doing this and then you're just your inhibitions are
gone and someone's like shot like fuck You're like, fuck it. Right.
And because you don't feel it instantly.
Right. And then all of a sudden you're pissing in the parking lot and throwing up at home.
Yep.
Yep.
Yep.
Yep.
While your kid's shitting his diaper.
Well, he was asleep.
He was asleep.
Yeah.
Probably still shitting his diaper.
He has started shitting in his diaper in the middle of the night.
Really?
Yeah.
That's like a new phase in his
development that's tough everything well i mean then he wakes up and you change him and you put
him back down it's not how was the zoo you said he went to the first time was it was pretty fun
so yeah now i'm looking for things to um fill our you know there's like a four or five hour, five or six hour window where
Rachel's gone and it's just me and the baby.
So I'm looking for like, kind of like a calendar of things
due, like Mondays we do this, Tuesdays we do this. So you want to do a podcast?
He's not, he's more like an analog guy.
Oh, okay. Okay.
But the zoo was really fun.
And I guess.
Do you know.
What's his name?
Justin.
Yeah.
What?
Justin the tall black guy.
Forget his last name.
Justin.
I don't know.
He's a comedian.
Okay.
Tyler Menz.
I know Tyler Menz. Yeah. So they're both. I met him the other day for the first time. He's a comedian. Okay. Tyler Menz. I know Tyler Menz, yeah.
So they're both dads. I met him the other day for the first time.
They're both dads.
They're both very funny.
And they both were like, oh, yeah, we go to the zoo all the time.
So it's like a very interactive thing to do.
There's other kids around.
You don't have to worry about your kid being crazy
because there's other kids screaming.
Oh, they're all crazy.
So the zoo was great.
We got a membership.
You get a membership at the zoo?
Oh, yeah.
Really?
So what was it?
I think it was like $120 for the year,
which includes parking.
Oh, that's not bad at all.
You park there.
You go like five times.
One parking, just parking once is 15 bucks.
Oh, so you can go three times to zoo in your cover.
Yeah.
Yeah.
That's big.
Yeah, we're going once a week for a while.
Once a week, yeah.
That's my plan.
That's not bad.
We saw a monkey.
We saw a bonobo monkey eating its own shit first time out.
I don't think you can top that.
That's a home run for him.
You know what I mean?
How old is he again?
He's like almost two and a half.
So he's about the same age as Cal.
Jake's kid.
Jake's kid, yeah.
Jake's kid comes out.
Alex.
He's seven.
Yeah. Oh, that would be insane time for bed father got like an ascot on yeah boat shoes um no but we took i just call my like basically
call my little nephew i call my unofficial godchild.
But the wedding we're going to, it's their kid.
And his first time at the zoo, they brought him down to the Milwaukee Zoo.
Because it's better than the Henry Violet Zoo in Madison, where I worked for a minute.
Okay, so that was the first zoo Abe went to.
Henry Violet?
Yeah, we went there, like, a few weeks ago.
But that zoo is free.
It is free.
Is it?
Yeah, it is free.
There isn't a lot there, though.
I mean, enough for a two-year-old.
For a two-year-old.
It's perfect.
It is cool.
They have some cool animals there.
When I worked there, I was able to...
I fed the bears.
Really?
They just let...qualified well i was
behind the cage still though you think that like they let me see like up close i was uh i believe
i fed a red panda or got really close to a red panda believe you i don't remember if I fed it or not, but I have pictures of me in the cage of the red panda.
I saw, they're like, we're going to go look at the rhinos behind their exhibit.
I was like, okay, cool. Did you go to Madison?
And I got there.
Yeah, we both went to Madison.
How didn't I know that?
I thought you went to.
Stevens Point?
No, I thought you went to Milwaukee.
Oh, no.
Oh, no, because you know your way around comedy on set okay yeah it's madison okay okay okay well i've seen a rhino
piss it is like imagine the world's most you remember like squirt guns growing up yeah and
you're like i want the like the the blast like the hydro blaster. The super soaker, that times a thousand.
It is a fire hose coming out of this monstrosity of a cock on a rhino.
And it's so nonchalant.
They were like watering him down, giving him a bath,
and he just started peeing.
I'm like, the piss coming out was,
there was more coming out of him than the hose.
What was your job title?
I was assistant to the event coordinator.
Because I wanted to do events for a while.
I didn't know what I wanted to do, to be honest, in college.
How does that lead to you feeding the animals?
Well, they're just like I started.
And let's be honest, at Henry Violet's, you've seen the zoo.
The assistant to the event coordinator
at a free zoo doesn't have a lot to do so like go check out okay i got paid 250 for the summer okay
uh i could see you being a really good like events coordinator i could see you doing that
the event went real well well good time not there, but I could see you being like a...
I could put on a fun party if I wanted to.
Or like, yeah, you could be one of those guys like,
come to this.
I could see you putting on a string of really successful club nights,
and then one of them catches on fire,
and then you go to Europe or something.
You know what I mean?
That could be your trip.
What was that island?
Jake dies in the EDM fire.
In the EDM.
Yeah, laser beams, actually.
Legit laser beams.
Yeah.
People are just getting zapped left and right.
Like, fuck, we hired the wrong people.
What was that island that didn't work out?
Fire Island?
Fire Island.
Fire Island?
Yeah.
Like, was it F-Y-R-E?
Yeah, that was unfortunate.
I had tickets.
Did you?
No.
I bet I could see that.
I was a big Kony 2012 supporter, though.
Events, so now you're a personal trainer.
Yep.
Honestly, I just fall into things.
But, see, that's part of, part of your appeal on stage, too.
You have this very smooth, affable, nothing can kind of jar you, like Christine said.
I didn't know she said that.
She told me, and that was like weeks ago.
Well, Rachel was reading it on Facebook.
It's like stoic you just
have like this very like you roll with the punch kind of personality i try uh and uh
so you falling into things make sense i mean yeah it just happens i think i've gotten very lucky but
that's very that's like that's pretty rare i don't
think not a lot of people can operate like that successfully i can't do the i think it's just my
personality i mean you could say differently jake but i don't like being there are things where i
like being prepared and organized i think it's a good balance like the other day i'm like jake you are a mess in
the spice cabinet and like that's like this kitchen is basically me like all my stuff it's always like
i try and keep it clean all the time but then a lot of my personality in terms of like socializing
like let's just see what happens yeah like let's do this let's do that but whatever but there's also an element of like
part of that is like you like taking care of people i like making sure people have fun
that is probably i mean like when we were when we were coming up in the building and there was some
redheaded freak sorry jake dude he showed up in the creepiest van yeah lives on floor seven like he's
got money but he's driving around in like a rapey van and he was right behind us in the elevator and
you turned around and you said what floor like you make sure that's part of like you make sure
people are taken care of i think that's just polite, but not a lot of people do that. I mean, that's a form of politeness that I think not, like,
I'm not saying not other people are polite,
but that's like a version of it that you don't see very often.
And I think it means a lot.
It's like a tiny thing, but it means a lot to people.
Yeah, I hate when people don't do it.
I've gotten into the elevator and they hit, like, floor two.
It's like, one, take the fucking stairs.
But also my hands are full.
Like I have groceries, my lunchbox from work, my backpack, my phone keys.
And they just stare at me.
And then they watch me use my like elbow to hit floor five and four because I barely missed.
They're probably like so in their head.
You know what I mean?
It's not like the thought occurs.
I'm like, should I help this person?
No, I'm not going to help this person.
It just doesn't even occur to them.
What kind of person are you in the elevator?
Let's say you're going from floor 10 to 1.
It's you and another person in the elevator.
Are you on your phone immediately,
or do you look and try and talk to them?
No, I definitely won't try and talk to them. no i definitely won't try and talk to them i'll just sit there hopefully
i'll have a listen to a good book that sort of thing i'm a big audiobook guy i'm in like
opportunity thing like if they walked if i got i was in the elevator it stopped at 10 and like
their them their dog walked in i'd like say hi to the dog. So it's like break the silence.
Sometimes I've caught myself and I've gotten yelled at just staring at the other person.
I stare at people sometimes.
Like I know it bothers me.
It bothers me so much that I've gotten in the elevator and they just immediately go to their phone and they do the thing where they're like, oh, I have a message.
Or they're like, they go open up like six apps.
Meaning you want to talk to them? No, I don't want to talk to them but i also don't want to be like hey don't
pretend like you're busy i say we're just riding up the elevator like who cares we don't need to
talk but they're just like and i just stare i'm like listen you're not doing anything no one's
snapping you right now no one texted that's it that's anxiety or insecurity yeah we've all done
it too though where i've seen someone get in the elevator and I'm like,
I definitely don't want to talk to you
like the homeless lady the other morning.
And I was like...
I think the worst thing is
you're on the sidewalk
and you're too far from somebody.
And you've already recognized them?
Yeah.
And you already know them, though.
Oh, you already know...
You recognize them?
That is bad.
Where it's like,
hey, I know you, but I don't know you kind of thing on the where it's like hey i know you but i don't
know you kind of thing on the sidewalk right you're like all right do i say hi do i do whatever
okay so like at a party okay you're leaving a party yeah do you feel like you have to say
bye to people or do you feel comfortable just leaving i irish goodbye yeah i leave all the
time yeah yeah there if it's like,
if it's my friend's party,
let's say you threw a party here.
I didn't live here.
And you're like,
come here.
I would be like,
Hey,
thanks for having me leaving.
But I'll end that.
Like I'm out.
Yeah.
I don't care.
Yeah.
My other bad thing I don't like,
and then I'm going to ask you the last question.
Um,
so we're over an hour already.
Yeah.
Um,
I need to have my third beer.
But, and I've made, like, the slightest joke about it,
is when you see someone on the sidewalk and you don't know them,
one, head nod up with guys as I know you.
Head nod down as I recognize you.
Would you agree with that?
So, like, I know you head nod down as I recognize you. Would you agree with that? So like,
I know you,
you're like,
yeah,
I mean,
I think heads up is pretty universal,
but I think,
but when I don't know something,
it's like,
and it's all in my head,
like,
this is all we're supposed to say.
Where's this remote?
So I can get the light back on your face.
I did this at Bremen like four months ago. This guy with his dog is I'm walking in my car this
guy with his dog's walking towards me and I like I locked eyes with him again uh far distance ahead
so I know I'm gonna have to do the head down nod when he gets to me just be like
and then he gets to me and as as he's like, here he goes,
hey, man, how are you?
You can't say something as you're passing him and you're passing him because then I go, and then I just walk.
That's just his version of like, that's his version of like, hey.
But you don't say it like when I'm next to you.
Like if we're crossing and then we're shoulder to shoulder.
I'm looking for a real answer.
I know, but then I'm responding as I'm walking away from you.
Yeah, so you just say, hey, man.
Hey.
But I'm already not even looking at you.
You don't have to look at him to say hey.
So is it not weird if you're like, hey, what's up?
Then I just not let him like, oh, good, how are you?
It's just like, hey, yo, something like that.
No, it's uncomfortable.
Like I turn into a mute who's trying to talk.
I'm just like, keep walking.
Yeah, I get how it like it's not ideal, but I don't think there's any.
All I'm trying to say is don't say anything.
Just do the head down.
You don't know me.
That's easier.
It's easier.
Yeah, I get it.
All right, I'm going to ask you this last one.
I'm going to get my third beer.
I said I was was gonna definitely have um so usually i just asked one serious question at the end this is
i think i just checked my watch like i knew what episode number this was
um so you have the same question as the last couple guests
what is your meaning of life in five words or less?
Be creative however you can.
Did you say be creative or weed creative?
Be creative however you can.
Okay.
Be creative.
That's good.
I like that.
Yeah, yeah.
All right, now explain.
I think everybody is creative in a lot of,
and I think it comes out in a lot of ways.
You know, like people have this kind of fixed idea
of what like art is or what like
counts as like being an artist but i think every human being and probably a lot of animals
uh are creative meaning like they can grow in a a vocation or discipline and they can kind of hit
brick walls and get better at something and contribute something that to this
thing or do a version of that thing that nobody else could do whether it's comedy or sewing or
piano playing or skiing or you know juggling like i think there is a way to be creative and artistic
in pretty much anything and i think everybody has the capacity to be creative and artistic in pretty much anything.
And I think everybody has the capacity to do that.
And,
you know,
we should,
uh,
appreciate that about each other.
I like it.
That's a good way to end.
All right.
Do you want a cookie?
I already had a half a cookie,
dude.
Do you not have alcohol,
gastritis?
Do I not?
I do not have it,
thankfully,
but thanks for having me.
Absolutely.
Wonderful meeting you, Jake.
Jake, do you want to step into the camera?
I didn't know what you looked like.