Fat Chance Podcast - Ep.7 - Marco Martinez
Episode Date: March 26, 2021We back!! After a long month of last minute cancelations, I finally get a guest to stop by again. Marco Martinez is an old high school friend of mine from Franklin. Listen in as we talk coaching youth... sports, the spring break diet and raising the participation generation.
Transcript
Discussion (0)
or like cod and predict call of duty in particular so i should probably get used to being on the
camera if i want to do it you thought about doing what uh streaming is that well by the way we're
we're going um as how everyone starts um streaming oh can you see me yeah it looks like uh once i
can see you all right cool we're. We're golden. All right.
No, streaming.
You said you wanted to start it.
Are you doing, is it the Twitch stuff?
Because I want my brother to do it.
Yeah.
Because he's a, have you ever played with him online?
He's a fucking maniac.
And not like, I don't know if he's good or not.
I've heard he is.
He screams.
I mean, it's fuck this, fuck that.
Your mom's a whore. I mean, he is he screams I mean it's fuck this fuck that your mom's a whore I mean the I mean he could get like canceled not really canceled but it's yeah I mean uh it's gold it's gold yeah
there's obviously the the family friendly friendly stuff but I know I think if you're just starting
it kind of doesn't really matter unless you know you terms of service. But I don't think anyone's here to report right away.
Yeah, I mostly just play with a lot of guys from Whitewater and Franklin.
Still?
Nothing.
No one too big.
I haven't got back into any of that.
What was it?
High school?
MW2?
That's all I played online.
That was it.
I don't know.
I never did like Grand Theft Auto online.
I never did.
I don't even know what other games you play online.
I don't know.
Right now it's, there's like so much, but obviously I think now with working from home
and a lot of people thinking that they can uh try youtube and and twitch um it definitely
it's it's pretty much where all that tension goes so like if you're familiar with like battle royales
or i don't know if that's what your brother plays but that's like uh that's fortnight i know that
yeah okay night and now call of duty but that's like a lot of like where where the money is i
guess per se but yeah um andrew's a big call of duty guy he
did fortnite for a while i think i just walked in on him doing minecraft can you do that online
yeah you can uh i know like the community is around there it's either like speed running which
is just like beating like the um survival mode but i don't know it's just kind of like living
on your own otherwise a lot of people just set up like a community or a world with their with their subscribers or their viewers
so i think that's definitely a way to so it's like a pixelated like sims world like can you
explain how does one beat minecraft i on it like because i've never like i've logged in on my
brother's thing and i was like i want to try and build something i don't know how many years ago and it's just like what's the point like you build
a house and it's like oh you build another house oh let's build a mountain how do you beat um so
like i don't know if i should be proud for knowing all this but no i mean it's just like it's not my
domain of yeah um so for like the survival world where you can quote unquote beat, it's just, like, it's not my domain of... Yeah. So, for, like, the survival world where you can, quote, unquote, beat it,
it's, like, you kind of want to get...
How do I say it?
Like, you want to build towards, like, an underworld, kind of,
where you can, like, get a lot of unique objects
and fight a lot of different creatures.
And then, eventually, you get a bunch of rare items
to the point where you beat, like, the overall, like, overall like i don't know boss if you want to say um but it's like
called uh it's like a dragon or something and then after that you like get the whole like um
credits and say you beat minecraft and whatnot so that oh so there is like a kind of a not really a
story mode objective but you can literally do your own thing, which is
like.
Because I know you can turn off.
I mean, I know enough about it.
You can turn off.
You can turn off like villains or whatever it is or zombie mode or whatever you called
it.
Yeah.
Um, and just build stuff, which I know a lot of people just do it, go in there to build
stuff.
But if you will spend hours on it, I couldn't just.
Oh, for sure.
I lose patience so quickly with
like one thing but i do prefer the open world games more than just like do this do that do that
game over yeah i uh i don't know it's definitely a big mix but i mean if you're interested in
creating things i think that's definitely something where a lot of people spend time where
i know a lot of guys from uh franklin they'll they'll get lost and i know they had their own
world so that was kind of funny to listen to and have them all like um kind of sign in and then
they're like yo did you build this building like i'm trying to build down the road from you i'm
trying to set this up like um create like i don't know a store or something like and then i don't know it's just
funny listening to but um yeah dude i can't get into that i don't know why these these are just
turning off tech difficulties tech difficulties that's how all my goes
hmm well I wish I knew more about cameras
I did too
cause
I mean this happened
I did one I guess I did one
two weeks ago
yeah and I'm glad I noticed that but I did one two weeks
ago about with two girls that are
like kind of into conspiracies and
one camera just shut off and i
had only two of the three videos i'm like this this sucks i don't know like you watched me turn
all three of them on earlier yeah and then uh they just all went black so except for yours
like it likes you but mine doesn't work at all apparently um the middle one works which i guess
i don't know if they go black let me know and then we'll
just i might just go straight to audio again because i'm fucking i need someone to do this
for me i'm so sick of and a place to put this because setting this up and taking it down to
park in the garage is annoying as shit i can only imagine with all the cords but like i last week
before uh my guest canceled,
it took me like half hour to set everything up.
And then he canceled. I'm like,
what the fuck? So I just said, screw it.
I'm going to find something for next week.
And I just left half it up. I'm like,
you know what? It's not going to be that cold. Thank God.
Yeah. Luckily we had good weather
this time around. Yeah. I'm glad
it's not pouring rain. I don't think they would hear it.
Braxton and I have done plenty where it's windy and rainy and no one's heard anything
but oh well yeah do i have it yeah i'm so scared things are gonna shut off it's not good i guess
we have to do the occasional uh look over but okay yeah i'll just i mean if yours goes black
let me know should we just restart i'm just kidding we're
not restarting the conversation so welcome to the podcast welcome back we're gonna do another five
minutes on minecraft um that's actually not a joke um dude i i started coaching lacrosse really
yeah i'm now a coach for franklin there you go I never thought, like when we played football or lacrosse,
I mean,
we did both,
but I didn't like looking,
especially football.
I hated looking at the kids
that like came back right away
or like,
oh,
I'm the cool guy.
I'm coaching,
blah, blah, blah.
And I think it's just football for me.
It's like,
dude,
give it up.
You're,
go enjoy college
or whatever.
Also,
you're coming back.
You look way bigger than you were a year ago.
Something didn't go right.
Got the freshman 15 freshman 50 for something like,
Oh,
good Lord.
And you know,
I'm talking about,
but I'm like,
just,
just go just like,
let us do our thing.
And so I don't feel as bad doing it with cross,
but cause I'm doing fifth and sixth and seventh and eighth.
Yeah.
And it's a club and i didn't know
our club that we started which is kind of cool to say isn't it's still not like the high school
adopted the sport and then just didn't adopt the club so like you know how there's franklin
youth programs yeah so so like franklin lacrosse club is completely separate from franklin high
school which i guess franklin youth is completely separate from franklin high school but it almost
like i feel like everything's connected where it's like uh the seventh and eighth graders go
to the varsity games and not like some age eighth graders can't go to the lacrosse games. But it's like it's two separate entities.
It's a little weird.
Yeah, that is weird.
But I met the vice president of the lacrosse club at the gym I work out at.
He goes, you play lacrosse?
And I had the Franklin lacrosse shooter on.
Did you say look at me?
I was like, yeah, look at this.
No, I had my Franklin lacrosse shooter on.
And I was like, yeah.
He goes, are you ever interested in coaching? I was like, I had my Franklin lacrosse shooter on and I was like, yeah. Um,
he goes,
are you ever interested in coaching?
I was like,
I thought about it.
He goes,
I'm the vice president for Franklin.
I was like,
well,
funny enough.
I don't know if you want to start with it.
Um,
and I just like,
we texted back and forth.
I started going to the practices.
Fifth and six is fun.
Seventh and eighth, I don't think I could coach high school.
Yeah, it's...
It is so...
I want to pull my fucking hair out.
Yeah, they'll say one thing and they'll do the other.
I don't know.
Like seventh and eighth, I'm breaking them in, I think.
But it's just at the age where their ego starts to develop i think and you look
back it's like fuck was i this annoying was i this kid was i that kid who thought he was like
his shit didn't stink and i was like oh don't need to listen you fuck footwork blah blah yeah i'm
like oh my i want to kill all of them like oh it's annoying. But it is kind of fun getting back into it,
and I have the itch to play all the time now.
I'm asking Coach, can I get a goal?
I want to go to the park and shoot around.
Can I go rip a few?
Yeah, I want to just – oh, God.
I feel – I can't say young, but I feel like I went back in high school
and we just started playing again
because we were obsessed
with it
oh yeah
I played all the
fucking time
but
it's already paying
dividends for me
because
I got
I got pulled over
for speeding on Monday
oh man
you know what
first time in my life
I've ever been
pulled over
beside
like okay
that's a lie
I've been pulled over
once because they
thought my car was stolen and he goes sir is this is this your car like uh yeah i'm driving it and
he goes uh this is what's your name like michael goes this isn't registered under you like what
are your parents name because this was in high school i'm like yeah i don't know and they're
like like i we bought this car like four months ago.
I didn't just get away with stealing it for four months.
Like no one's reported this missing nothing.
And it turns out the lady at the DMV, like, I think this is like grounds to lose your job.
But we handed her like the registration and she just goes, okay.
And just, it was on the desk when we went later that weekend or something like that to get like hey where is it she goes oh it's
right here just shuffled under like for four months four fucking months anyway first time
we get pulled over for doing something quote unquote bad and he goes do you know how fast
you're going or what's the speed limit was like 55 goes how fast you're going? Or what's the speed limit? I was like 55. He goes, how fast are you going? I'm like 75.
And I didn't have the greatest attitude, but it wasn't like the worst.
And I'm on my way to the gym.
I'm tired.
I'm like, fuck, here we go.
And right before he goes to take my stuff back to the cop car, he goes, are you a coach?
And I go, yeah.
And that was it.
And I go, the fuck does he want to know that?
He comes back in 15 seconds.
He goes, all right, I'll see you around.
I'm like, what?
He goes, yeah, my kid plays lacrosse.
I go, oh, where does he play?
He goes, Franklin.
But he said it like, Franklin, you fucking idiot.
Like, I wouldn't let you off.
You don't know my kid?
No, he's like, Franklin.
No, he plays for Marquette, and I'm letting the Franklin coach go.
But he's like, yeah he plays for marquette and i'm letting the franklin coach go um but he's like yeah my my kid plays for franklin um i thought they played in falls like no we just started up um what's his name thinking like i'm about to have to put this kid in like playing time
even though i'm the assistant coach i have no idea i'm gonna like schmooze the head coach like hey
let this guy fucking go um he goes no he broke his leg so he's not playing
right now i'm like so you're letting me off because i started two weeks ago as a coach
and not coaching your kid he's like basically yeah and then just let me go i was like oh thank
the lord wow oh it looks like you got your uh you're starting to get your roots in with franklin
so yeah it's just scary that's another thing I'm like, fuck, I got to go.
Now I'm in it.
I'm here for a good two months now. The season's over. I'm good.
But then we should leave because you every time we drink or whatever, and I don't know how much truth is to it.
You're like, wherever you go, I'll go with I can work wherever.
know how much truth is to it you're like wherever you go i'll go with i can i can work wherever well i was gonna i was gonna get to that later but um i've been well i guess if you want to
switch topics now yeah um are you moving well i don't know yet but uh from for what or like my job
they offer rotations and uh there's like a new consulting line that we kind of
starting in the central region, which I was going to mention to you to get some of your
insights or whatnot, but there was an opening in the Miami office. Oh, good Lord. Yeah. So,
so with that, yeah, there's a new, new line for consulting. I reached out, interviewed, and got it. So in July, I don't know if I'll be down there.
So we're going to Miami.
We're going back to Miami.
Well, they said there's an opportunity to move full-time next summer.
That was the catch, is I have to just stay for one more year,
for my senior or supervisor year.
And then next summer, yeah, we're moving back down to Miami.
Moving back down to Miami.
Where in Miami?
Because it could be a lot of fun down there, especially now.
I mean, it's open.
Yeah.
Well, I mean, with all the spring break news I've been seeing.
Fuck.
I mean, it's not like it's going to stop Florida.
Are you kidding me?
As long as we're not where Sammy and I lived before,
which was basically for the Franklin residence, the Tuckaway.
Not Tuckaway.
The old people area of Miami.
I'm fine.
I mean, Miami can be fun, but I've said it a lot.
It's a good two-week spot and then bounce.
There's a lot.
And then fucking bounce.
Go, Clint, take a shower.
Dip in.
Wipe yourself down.
It can get gross, but it's fun.
gross but it's fun i didn't i want to go back and do the fall winter spring months rather than the song i mean i did and i did end of march to middle of september yeah the crazy summer months
spring break into the start of school so i got not like anyone was really there for school either
it was like spring break they're
gone then they have like a month where we're getting to know the area and then they're gone
again for summer it's like there was no one i mean i think we hung out with people our age
once besides like his co-workers i swear to god, Hunter, for replying to me 48 hours later.
By the way, Austin Meyer, here's the first episode in a month.
Yeah.
Hey, Austin, I got you your update.
Funny enough, even less than 24 hours after you asked about it.
Did you tell him you were coming on?
No, I played stupid, and I was like, oh oh really like does he have people on it or something or like how's
that how's that been going and he's like yeah he hasn't really released it in like a month so i
don't know like what he's doing i'm like well what i was just thinking in my head now i got your
your new episode so it's gonna look like austin said that to you and you're like you called me
i'm like dude you need some you need to get on i need on you need some fucking content man oh god yeah no it's unfortunate after
we had a good run and then i was i had a big cancellation which sucked because we think this
guy might have covid um but then another cancellation blah blah so it's been tough but oh well i have one episode
in the bank that it just looks i'm such i want to say i'm a perfectionist because i don't edit
any of the audio um it's all raw or in my mother's garage on a table from college on
six different size two by fours i don't know if you can see it in the thing
but we're none of them match like if you if the wind blew hard enough this would blow over
yeah while we have the garage door open and in wisconsin march so yeah um so i can't say
perfect just although i i said it with braxton like this is like the eric fortman basement of garages yeah um it's perfect
but yeah no i think we'll get things rolling but yeah the the conspiracy people um i might
release that one soon it's just it's the only camera that looks good because it moved is so
the camera was on them is basically the back of my head and then there's one on me and then there's one of the
whole room and we're not here so it's not like a set i like so i just scrapped the footage of them
and it's just the whole room me whole room me it's like i look really into myself for this episode
um but yeah maybe i'll just put it out i don't care i do care actually that's a fucking
lie well you can uh i mean you can just point to this is where i started and then
you're uh this is where i started the camera views oh where i started i mean this is technically
where everything started and we're on episode seven or i guess 8. Of every episode I've done of this new one, The Fat Chance,
this is the first one we've done in here.
The first one.
It's good to be back.
It feels so good.
I was like a kid in a candy store.
When you actually said, I'm on my way, I'm like,
all right, he hasn't canceled yet.
I'm waiting for it. I'm ready.
I'm waiting for it. I looked at my mom. I was mom's like knowing my luck and i hope it doesn't happen like marva's
gonna get in a car accident or like tires gonna blow out or someone's gonna call him into work
or he's suddenly just gonna pack up and move to a different state and be like i can't record today
i can't make it today but i'll reschedule i'll reschedule i mean i'll see you in like a month
i'm gonna do a year mi back, and we'll do it.
We'll talk about our experiences.
Where in Miami do you know you would go?
So right now, like the plan is, it's a two-month rotation.
But the office is located – let's see.
I was doing a little research on Google Maps.
That's the extent I know.
All right, let's see how good my memory is.
It's right across the bridge, like leading kind of inland from South Beach.
Like that, I don't know.
That's the office?
Yeah, it's like right down the road, maybe like a couple blocks down from the heat arena.
Oh, shit. I know exactly where the yeah
i know what you're talking about like the general area sammy had a buddy that he worked with that
lived right by the heat arena real close to marlins park yeah like it's it's a it's better
than where we live google maps made it look real real uh nice. Yeah, it's, I don't know, like I said, I don't know if I could do, and that's in July.
Well, I mean, it's only, I don't even know if I'm going down there yet, just because communication's been a little weird.
But, I mean, the way that at least I would work is I'm on, um, projects where,
I mean,
it,
it could be in Florida,
which is what they're hoping.
But at the same time I could get placed like in Chicago for like three weeks. So it,
it depends on like where I get kind of put,
but I'm working out of the Miami office.
That makes sense.
Like I'm not associated with Milwaukee.
How depressing would that be?
If like three months,
you're like Miami, Miami, Miami, Chicago.
Yeah, I was real hyped about it
because I saw it obviously in the list.
So that was my first priority
when I asked to interview.
But then when I was getting further details,
they're like, yeah,
you could get put in a project,
you know, in Chicago or something.
I'm like, well,
I don't want to be down the fucking road.
It's basically like,
you might as well be in Milwaukee.
Yeah.
With less people that you know.
Yeah.
Where else?
Like, what were the other options on that list?
So there's a lot of I just kind of want to get out of the Midwest.
Yeah.
Because I know it's something I really kind of want to work out of state, like far out of state.
But it was a lot of central.
It was like eight locations.
I don't know.
Minneapolis, Chicago, Cleveland. Cleveland was like eight locations. I don't know, Minneapolis, Chicago, Cleveland.
Cleveland was definitely the last.
Miami.
My top three choices were Miami, Atlanta, and Charlotte.
Yeah, those would be mine too.
Minneapolis and Chicago is just like Milwaukee to the right,
Milwaukee to the left.
Milwaukee way to the left if you're going to Cleveland. Or not way to the left yeah like milwaukee way to the left if you're going to cleveland
or not way to left but it's dude yeah fuck that's not like very diverse i think charlotte would be
really cool i don't know enough about it where yeah i haven't been to charlotte i've been to
atlanta um i know for like a conference i spent like a few days there so I kind of
I got a feeling of it I was there for a day that's it when we drove Sam down
um I can say the club club life is pretty nice in Atlanta oh yeah we didn't go there we did
Topgolf and then like their version of the public market which was cool yeah like we were on a
fucking date now that I think about it.
Where are we trying to get dinner?
Sam, we have two weeks vacation down to Miami.
What do you want to do in Atlanta?
I don't know, dinner and some golf?
Fuck.
Yeah, no, I mean, it was probably a good thing him and I didn't go to the club.
Because literally two days later, Sam was in jail.
Yeah.
So, I mean. In Disney. the club i mean because literally two days later sam was in jail so so i mean uh in disney like
outside of disney the man got arrested yes i couldn't even imagine atlanta either
i don't know it's like he would have been shot yeah he wouldn't have been shot but
i don't know sam i don't know that that place kind of reminded me of Chicago, but even more on top of each other.
It's kind of weird.
It's just like...
I hated driving down there.
I swear, in the three hours we were driving in the city, I'd almost gotten into 10, 15 accidents.
I was on edge.
I didn't like anything.
It was when the Super Bowl was going to be there i think when we
we drove down there so they were adding on to the stadium where they were prepping their shit
everywhere it's like this is horrendous which isn't a good showing when you're like oh would
i live here and it's like no we look like super bowl mid everyone getting down there and just
it's like anton and anhelm like there's no way I'd fucking live down here, which I'm assuming it's not like that all the time,
but yeah.
Well,
when I,
uh,
when I got an Uber to the airport,
I know the,
it was just wall to wall.
And I mean,
it's similar to like LA or something.
Uh,
you basically had to be very aggressive while driving.
And I knew that from what I saw.
Yeah.
That's when you're definitely glad you have an Uber driver who's willing to do
that.
Yeah.
You're Midwest Wisconsin drivers.
You're not.
I mean, I think we're aggressive enough, but we're not used to that kind of traffic.
The whole wave thing while we're driving past somebody.
Oh, thanks.
Thanks, man.
Meanwhile, there's like an accident.
I've been sitting here for like 10 minutes.
You can go.
It's fine.
Whereas like LA, it's like, or even Chicago, all you hear is horns all day.
Oh, yeah.
It might as well be just the norm.
It is the norm.
Dude, fuck, I'm jealous that you have that as a possibility.
Yeah, I mean, my eyes lit up when I saw it come across
like a daily opportunity or something like this upcoming.
So, yeah, like I said, I...
Just jump on it.
Do you know anyone that's down there?
No. So it'll no no fresh start good
good good good maybe i'll just come stay down there for what you're down there for two weeks
three weeks three weeks hopefully but then uh i mean if i accept full-time then there for a little
bit and make some friends in those three weeks yeah um i don't know if Sam and I know anyone else down there still. I'll do my best networking.
Fuck, dude.
I was looking into, I was thinking about that today.
I would even do, like, go find just a temporary gig.
Just say, fuck it.
I would even bartend again for three months.
Yeah.
Just to, like, move.
Like, I don't care.
Go move somewhere go three months go to denver in the summer or go to texas would be really fun um i i would honestly
i think i'm gonna start looking at that next month like just because you can get an airbnb
for a month like fully furnished internet all some places for like 500 yeah i know which is
stupid cheap yeah i'm surprised on how how low airbnb is compared to like a hotel and obviously
if you can get the right one it's so much nicer and for a full month for like even if it was 700
most people now are paying like rent like if you're in the city is a thousand dollars
plus um just outside you're probably six to nine hundred um but to get a full air and be furnished
like basically cheaper than a month's rent wherever you want like why not why would you not
go do that yeah it's just a matter of pulling the trigger like am i really just gonna go pick up
and go for a month but i did that to miami so for six months fair enough i don't know it kind of
makes me think because i do at least before covid i did a lot of traveling for work so
um i mean i wish i would go to more glorious places like i mean i went to like apple center
you know lacrosse or something so i don't think there's that good of traveling for work it's 45 minutes north of here
i'm in a hotel so you can you can say you feel like you're kind of on vacation yeah what is that
i could if i stayed in a hotel across the street tonight i'd feel like i'm kind of on a mini
vacation yeah i think it's just like if i'm just being in that area i can't think of
the right word but like the ambience i was like oh i'm on vacation i'm sleeping where i don't
normally sleep yep and it's oddly really comfortable it could have i could see like
cockroaches crawl on the floor next to me like but i'm not i'm not at home
which is like super comfortable i'm not not paying for anything. I have my own food.
Yeah, I miss.
I was thinking about it.
I was like, I really miss.
Plus, definitely before COVID,
but even since stuff has been opening up a bit
and you can travel more,
like the me that just kind of like said,
fucking go places.
Yeah, I mean, I tried to do that in college too, but.
We did do that once yeah spring break
yeah i was just thinking about that that might be the quickest turnaround of like
you when i texted you i was like do you want to go to spring break you're like
yeah what are you doing like well we're leaving in like four days he goes all right sure say less
say less i'm like and i even go we need another car by the way if we're all in like four days he goes all right sure say less say less i'm like and i even go we
need another car by the way if we're all gonna go he goes i'll invite some more people with a car
and we drove down four days later what 25 hours to just about yeah 20 25 26 but yeah i was thinking
about that last night i was like well let's think of all the times i had with michael in case
something comes up and i was like oh my god that spring break trip oh god dude that
was a that was yeah like you said it was like the most all right i got i'm just thinking of
something you want to try and do it yeah why not and then next thing you know we're down in
south podry we're like actually doing it like i remember getting in the car i'm like holy fuck
you guys actually are here we met in like what was it beloit and we're like yeah yeah this is this is happening i uh so i went back the next year to padre which is i mean i am the padre maniac like
i am the definition of the padre man and so to describe those two trips like i think the best
part about ours when we went for me was when we stopped
at TCU.
Yeah.
I was thinking about the colleges there and back and Kansas on the way back.
Yeah.
Stupid fun.
Actually Padre,
like I had fun,
but we walked a mile and a half to like the right part of the beach to party.
Yeah.
Um,
every day.
Um,
luckily enough, we had like the people across from us
like they had a giant house we could stay at i think every day the whitewater guys you guys
took turns dying and i don't mean like oh he got too drunk oh yeah like i i thought one of you was
possessed at once like i think someone started biting. Who bit?
Did Sal bite Austin's fingers?
That was me biting Sal's finger because he thought, I don't even know, I was choking on something.
He tried to make you throw up.
Yeah.
He thought putting his hand down your throat was the logical thing to do.
Well, luckily, he still has all five fingers, but.
I'm convinced if it was roles reversed, you wouldn't have a finger.
Probably not.
Sal would have bit through, like he would have smiled at you too.
Just give you that crazy look in his eyes and, you know, fingers chilling.
Oh, good Lord.
But I think every day you guys took a turn on, all right, who's going to, I don't know,
go park cannibal and then disappear for three hours or, I don't know, maybe fall asleep in the pool.
I know there is somebody who I think was one of the, I think probably the hardest of laugh with you guys.
We're all just day drinking, drinking the beat boxes.
Oh my God.
And then they're like, all right, you know, the occasional day drink nap time.
And then somehow in some way that person woke up just drunker than they want to bed.
Whereas, you know, it's supposed to be the other way around.
You're supposed to feel better and go out at nighttime and we're like what the fuck happened were you
were you uh shotgun and beers in your sleep or some shit where were we well when i swear when
we when you drink as much as we did on those trips and it's like the beat boxes for those
people who don't know is i think it's a box of franzia but not it's a
mixed drink and i swear to god it was like i don't think they're a real thing to be honest
because i've never seen them again i passed yeah i passed never seen them again i'm convinced it
was just a guy who made mixed drinks and had leftover cardboard that he painted and was
selling them in the uh publics outside of wherever it
were and but we drank because we walked a mile and a half we had one whole we'd bring two of them
we'd have the whole beat box on the way down yeah a beat box while we're there plus whatever we had
in our cooler and we had in our pockets walk back and drink if we had anything left over. And we'd nap instantly.
It's not like we like wound down.
Yeah.
Then took a nap.
It was like slam a beer and pass out.
Like that stuff was still hitting him.
And he woke up.
He was probably like peak like, oh, fuck.
This is bad.
Mom, I'm in trouble.
We also ended up staying at a.
Didn't we stay at a gay hotel too?
Yeah.
I think we got down and we're like.
Like this isn't, this isn't right.
Yeah.
We're like, is this like the right address?
And we're like, what the hell is going on?
And we walked into the bar.
I'm like, we're definitely not supposed to be here.
And then we later found out.
I was like, yeah, for spring break, which is like anyone stays here.
I'm like, oh, okay.
I mean, it's not like it's a big deal anyway.
It's more like.
But to be fair.
It was aggressive.
Yeah.
And to be fair, it was, I mean, that room or whatever you want to call it was huge.
The villa or.
Oh, my God.
I was expecting.
It's like, all right, we're basically going to be sleeping.
It was like a full blown just like mini apartment.
Yeah.
I think it's even bigger than the one I have right now.
It's probably like two of these garages, honestly.
Yeah.
Full kitchen, everything.
Yeah.
With a deck, you can kind of see the beach at, but.
Yeah, no.
I mean, I think the greatest thing was we were right next to our breakfast, lunch, and dinner.
At least for me, Austin and Sal was a water burger.
How many times do you think you had water burger?
Oh, honestly, I think it was every meal.
Let's see. how many times do you think you had what a burger oh honestly i think it was every meal if uh let's say unless it was like a snack where we're like all right let's go to you know walmart or something and get like a bag of chips but it was uh it was what a burger i think i had it
three out of the five days and those three days i had it twice a day
yeah like it was let's go get lunch because for breakfast we already ran through
24 eggs like our breakfast oh yeah you know okay so it was lunch and dinner was what a burger and
in the morning we just made a shitload of eggs and bread whatever yeah it was oh it was uh and
i carried this over to the next time we went because i remember being duncan's idea he's like
i went grocery shopping.
We're like, eggs.
We need that.
Like, let's get some protein in us.
Bread.
Yep.
Soak up the booze.
And we're like.
Carbs, protein.
Yeah, carbs, protein.
Essentials.
And then we can have our boom box juice.
Yep.
So we can do the orange flavored one.
Like orange juice.
But I remember him going like, should we get some seasoning?
I'm like, yeah, salt and pepper is a yeah salt peppers good idea I was like do we really really need to buy two whole things so we just we just shot we bought this giant thing of a Cajun
seasoning so we had Cajun eggs and Cajun bread for five days in a row.
Like, we had to go buy more eggs.
And we almost ran out of the Cajun seasoning, I swear to God.
And then it was Whataburger.
That was it.
Not bad.
That's eaten good.
Dude, what's alarming is I drank more the second time I went than the first time.
And we came down with so much shit.
Oh, my God.
It's disgusting.
I mean, that place brings out.
I'm surprised.
I mean, two people almost did die when we went down there the first time.
Yeah.
A lot.
Yeah.
Day one, one guy went to the hospital with, like, his heart was, like, racing.
And then one guy, the rumor was he tried doing a backflip
into a kiddie pool i don't know the full story but like he broke his neck and then went out the next
day now that's grit then flew home and then one kid flew home after the first day because he wasn't
having fun i remember one guy at the whataburger i don don't know if it was maybe a Madison guy or just a random customer,
but someone called the police on themselves because they thought they lost their phone.
Oh, my God.
Yes.
This is some random customer.
Yeah.
I think he thought some girl stole his phone.
Yeah.
So then called the police.
And the girl's like, I don't know what the fuck you're talking about.
You just walked in here.
And the cops came, gave him an underage because he just lost his phone on the beach.
Can you imagine?
I mean, that's got to be so – you would get roasted so hard if that was part of our group.
Yeah, that's just a straight-up self-snitch.
Like, hey, man, we always said it would be so funny one day on spring break we got to go get someone out of jail.
But you're in jail because you called the cops on yourself?
You called on yourself.
I was like, dude, you're there the rest of the time.
I'm a menace.
Come get me.
Oh, good Lord.
That trip was fucking unbelievable.
Yeah.
And then I didn't think, I'm surprised we did Kansas on the way back.
We're like, you know what?
Five days of blacking out just wasn't enough.'s go to kansas what's one more stop and the other car stayed another night
yeah i mean at that point i was ready to go i was like just get me get me home yeah oh good lord
i could you do another trip like that um i think so, yeah. I easily could.
I don't want to fall into that trap.
It's like, no, man, we're too old.
No.
Like, I could easily do another trip like that.
If you got me 10 of my guy friends together,
and we're like, all right, you're going to the beach.
Maybe not, like, don't throw me into, like, South Padre
or Miami Beach during spring break.
A hot area. where it's like
like put covid aside i don't know if i could do um like all right you're going to a spring
break destination with a bunch of college kids because i would then i would start to be like oh
fuck i'm a little old like i could do bring 10 of us guys and we go like punticana or the dr or something like that
that's one of the nicer things where we know how to plan now out of school it's not four days in
advance like marco you want to go yeah sure when we leave it tomorrow all right hotels i don't know
places to go i don't know we'll see we'll stop on the way we didn't we slept in the car at tcu
in the parking lot of the football stadium, which we did again.
We basically did, on the way down, exactly what we did the first time, the second time.
Oh, Lord.
But there was no one there at TCU the second time.
It wasn't as fun.
It was fucking packed when we went the first time.
We ended up at some random person's house.
I was about to say, we were at a house party with speakers outside.
It was, I don't know.
That house is super cool.
I remember that.
I really enjoyed that.
So we were there for a while and then walked to the bars.
And then the one thing I can remember is just Sal having Bud Lights in all of his pockets.
And the bouncers.
I mean, just in general it's like you
can't really walk into a bar with outside alcohol so they're like you gotta drink them or dump them
he goes all right like basically all right bet and then just walks across the street as we can
see him in in view does all four or how many he had and then just walks back he goes all right
here's my id if i was the bouncer i would have been like dude you can come in with him if i watched him physically if he brought four beers in and i'm
like you can't bring those in and he went across the street looked me in the eyes like he would
if he bit your fingers and downed all four of them like dude i'll buy your drinks yeah oh my god he
sal can put him back yeah he uh he's just always been a monster for it
i mean he's he's a never-ending he's a garbage disposal yeah i know a lot of times in white
water it's i mean i'd probably try and race him but i was i was never able to keep up i there's
no way i could and i'd like to think i can drink a decent amount, but that man would put me on the table.
I mean,
what always scared,
not scare me,
but like food.
If we in high school,
the whole,
whole different,
whole different animal.
Yeah.
I mean,
we would go to after a football game or something like that.
If we didn't go to,
uh,
webs and we decided like,
Oh,
a few of us are going to Denny's.
Sal would order basically two meals, like meals for two people for himself.
And I would think I'm super hungry.
I'm like, give me the big breakfast or whatever.
And I would eat 75% of the day.
Yeah, I'll get three eggs instead of two eggs.
I'm going big today.
Trying to bulk up.
Yeah.
But it would, like you have, like my breakfast, his two breakfasts, and then yours.
And I got half mine left.
You got 25% of yours left.
He would eat all – he would finish both his before both of ours.
And then look at me while I'm slowing down.
He goes, you're going to finish it?
I'm like, are you serious?
As you're like choking yours down.
It's not even like it's leftover eggs and a little bit of hash browns, which is an easy thing to stomach it just slides down i mean it'd be like three pancakes and he just well i'm
like dude that how are you how is he not 400 pounds just built different i mean that man has
a hollow leg he's got to have the metabolism of a cheetah just yeah oh good lord i uh yeah i don't know i mean uh the only other example i can
think of is a lot of times in at whitewater we go to culver's as like our either hangover deluxe
meal or dinner and then i would get like i don't know like the standard meal and then he would get
like the meal uh cheese curds with the fries and that's just that's just like an appetizer and
then he'll get like you know i think an additional sandwich just to keep in his back pocket and it's
just like i don't know i don't know how you do it it's like that's for the car ride back before we
get home and then i'm gonna have my meal but if i'm still hungry i'll have that cheeseburger in
front yeah oh my god if i when i ate like shit in college and just drank, and it was all the time, which was still half the amount he drinks.
Yeah.
I mean, I ballooned up.
It looked like the Michelin tire man, I'll say.
Like, it didn't look good.
If I ate like he did, you would have had to roll me here.
Like, I would have to zoom out of that camera to get me in.
To get people in the Walmart motorized shopping carts.
Yeah, I'd be in the motorized one just struggling to get up to get something off the third shelf.
Yeah.
Which a six-year-old can usually get.
Yeah.
Oh, God.
That's kind of sad to see.
Well, it's the way it goes sometimes
And then again it is Walmart
So it doesn't bring up the best
Turn that microphone a bit
It's going to fall
See where you're looking at it now
They're real shit
There's no
No see when I bought these
They were bad to begin with
It's going to fall
I think better no i just
look and i was like uh i don't want it's basically i said that so i didn't have to add anything
and like turn your volume up if i have to at all and to be honest i probably still won't um well
at least the mic's not uh turned backwards now no i I look forward to the day that I can do this completely open garage and it's warm again.
Although this isn't that bad, I don't think.
Like, I'm still sitting here.
I mean, that should be still on the ground, to be fair.
Oh, God, yeah.
I don't know.
We've been known to get April snowstorms.
I'm actually surprised.
When it first warmed up and I was talking to heilman i was like there's there's no
way because he's like oh yeah the ski hill is gonna close soon well i'm like this is just a
fake spring it happens every year we have a week maybe two where it's like really warm weather
then it's like 40s and then we're gonna hit with another snowstorm and it snowed a little bit
but we really haven't gotten hit with anything super cold since it's warmed up.
Yeah.
Super snowy.
Like, we had one day of snow.
I'm, like, worried that come May.
You're just going to get blasted.
Winter weather advisory, two feet.
Southeast, oh, God, that's the worst.
Like, April 1s are the fucking worst.
Oh, yeah.
That is so depressing.
And then usually it's a week and then a warm-up for
good but it's like did we really need to do that fucking week of why do you gotta tease me like
that yeah oh my god i gotta go to practice now i don't want to sit out here i'm no longer moving
i'm just standing there now yeah i'm well going back to lacrosse i remember our practices in the
spring um for franklin we i think wasn't there some we had snow?
I can't remember.
I think maybe a light dusting.
Maybe it was white water, but I don't know.
I just remember being out there in the snow,
and it was horrible, especially with the sweat.
Yeah, the worst I remember is I remember playing Marquette our freshman year, and I'll never forget.
I swear to God it was raining sideways. Swear to God like i was like i shouldn't be getting hit like this with fuck
it was that when why does it hurt this shouldn't hurt as bad as it does um it's that is nice though
about spring sports is i like that it gradually just gets nicer and nicer as you're playing yeah
whereas football it's like i'm really dreading you're playing. Whereas football, it's like, I am really dreading.
When games really, really start to count, it gets worse and worse and worse.
I think, like, what our senior year, when we made it to those practices,
we're like, you just hear crunching from our cleats like we had snowshoes or something.
It was so good.
Like, I loved when we had Thursday walkthroughs.
I'm like, I can finally wear more clothes because it can actually fit.
I don't have to have my pads on over it.
Nothing was worse, though, when for me,
it's like I remember my sophomore year when we were in playoffs.
And, you know, the coaches know we're like,
we're probably not going to win this game or something like that and i remember getting he's like kuski do you want to suit up for
the varsity game in my head i'm like i'm not gonna play it's 10 degrees outside and i'm like
fuck no is this worthwhile it's like but you have to say yes i'm like oh great now i gotta go freeze
my dick off instead of being semi-warm in the
stands jumping up and down with all my friends yeah like and it sounds bad like i didn't want
it bullshit like it's so fucking cold when i just kind of it's a little bit different when you just
stand there so yeah you're standing like oh shit this suck and knowing it's like it's not even
especially then you're losing too so no one's happy on the sidelines like everyone's pissed
off no one even half them don't even know your name.
You're just like, I mean, I still am, but like,
fuck 30, fuck 30 just on the end, just like,
like, who's the fucking special kid on the end shaking?
Is he making fun of us because we're losing?
No, that was the worst.
I hated football practice. It it wasn't fun i loved
lacrosse practice and maybe because i think i was better at lacrosse than i was football
yeah i mean uh i don't know i just enjoyed lacrosse a lot a lot better but it was more i
don't know i just it's so laid back i was about to say i think definitely what it was more laid back whereas uh i know our coaching staff's uh pretty yeah they want to get shit done yeah oh for sure that's not like our
high school coaches didn't want to get shit done but it was when you are like just starting coaching
you still kind of want to like be a little bit friends with your players, I guess. And you don't exactly have it down pat.
Yeah.
Whereas, I mean, it was a strict regimen.
It was down to, I remember looking at,
because my dad ended up coaching football for a while, Franklin.
It would be like seven or, when did we get out of school?
Fuck.
230.
234.
234. What the fuck is that i i don't that has to be some like school guideline like we can only be in school for so many they had like some weird weird timing
with like the block schedules but i don't know i don't know 234 that always you can't just make it 230 i would make it 235 i'd be okay just round it up just
round it the fuck up please get out we'd all go what to the cafeteria snack put our stuff on and
i remember looking at the film and then it's like all right 330 practice 330 315 330, 315 special teams, 315 or 345 to four is like your position or whatever.
Four to 406 is this.
It's like special teams are like.
406 to 424.
I'm like, what the fuck are you doing?
Like you had broke it down that specifically and it was on the money.
They're like two minute water break.
It usually takes them like fat ass on the money. They're like two-minute water break. It usually takes them.
Like fat ass in the back usually takes a minute and a half,
so we got to at least give them two minutes.
Yeah, I know.
Definitely gave the O-lineman, D-lineman,
since we're a bunch of hogs,
but a little bit more time to get over there.
Yeah.
I mean, when you do it that long, you'd have it down to a regimen.
But I don't think I could ever do, I don't know.
Could you coach anything for one?
Well, I tried it in freshman year of Whitewater with Janesville for lacrosse.
Oh, yeah, I remember that.
I don't know.
I was taking 18 credits both semesters,
so I kind of want to focus on that rather than Jamesville.
I think it was youth as well, so I'm going to focus on that.
But I think getting back into it, I'd really enjoy it, especially because I do.
Oh, come out to some of the youth practices.
Yeah.
If you want to, you definitely could.
You can help hang out with the 7th and 8th graders because I'm the only one that has ever played lacrosse that's coaching them well i did yeah do
the four years and in whitewater so yeah you've technically played more years than me
um so you have more experience and there you play defense i need something to coach in defense
i had practice with them mond, and they divided this up.
And they're like, Michael, you want to coach defense?
I'm like, well, to be honest.
That wasn't my forte.
I'm probably their best option to teach it because I'm the only one that knows the sport.
However, never played it in my life.
Yeah.
I mean, 10 minutes before practice, I was on YouTube, like, defensive lacrosse drills.
Best drills.
Best drills.
It was filtered by, like, highest rated.
Seriously, what?
I was like, oh, this one says U.S. lacrosse.
Or like, oh, I remember that guy, Paul Rabel.
We'll do this one.
And so it's like, I just did 10 minutes of like, all right, here's footwork drills.
And then we just did one drill forever because they did not know
what 10 minutes was i'm like i don't have enough plan i have 10 minutes exactly please repetition
is uh is key please just keep doing that i'm not as a whisper yourself i have nothing else
none of these kids fucking listen it was a a drill i was like all right and you know where
they would fuck up to when i tell you this i I was like, all right, the first go, because I don't have a whistle.
I don't want to be the guy with the whistle.
Yeah.
I said, the first go, defense, run up to offense.
The second go, offense, run where I point you to go.
And then the defense has to follow you.
And I shit you not for the first 10 people.
I go, go.
And they both just sprint.
I'm like, oh, fucking Christ.
I'm like, are any of you passing your classes?
Can you count to two?
Go, go.
I just heard the word run.
I just ran.
And I'd be like, and then finally I'd yell him enough and I go, go.
And then the defense guy who's standing in front of me would just stand there.
I'm like, go.
Then the offense guy would go because i said the second goal i'm like what part of this are
you guys messing up yeah like this is so frustrating but i guess it's part of it
coaching younger kids but seriously come out and do it i mean yeah i mean i'd like to get back into
it i just when i did it with james 2, I was doing it with another college guy,
and he was trying to teach his high school system.
But I felt ours was a little bit better.
I don't know.
That's the beautiful part for me is, like, I'm not the head coach.
I don't want to be the head coach.
I'm basically just the young guy who's played before that can specialize in certain things.
And, like, basically what I'm being used for at fifth and six,
he's like,
wherever you see a teacher,
go for it.
And I'm like,
all right,
obviously it's his team.
I don't want to step on anyone's toes.
Um,
so they're doing their offense or whatever.
And you just follow that.
And then you're basically at that age,
just teaching fundamentals and then little things.
And you pull like a few kids aside.
You're like,
all right,
you clearly have some skills. Um, try this, try that. Can you try a little bit harder, please?
Like, listen, man, you should be able to dust this kid. Yeah.
However, I don't, I think if you just came every once in a while, you'd, you'd just consider it a
volunteer. If you're a coach, you have, I think you had to do this, but you had to take the training. Yeah.
I mean, I was fresh out of high school at 19.
It might be drastically different from fresh out of high school, what, six years ago?
Yeah.
Dude, this stuff, it's a lot.
I mean, we are raising the participation generation.
It is so bad.
I mean, I took— Here's how you throw.
Here's how you run.
Right foot, left foot.
No, not even that.
I wish it was like, teach them how to run one leg after the other.
I'm like, that would be a step up from what I was taking this class.
One of them was teaching me how to fill my children's emotional meters because with a low
emotional meter they're not going to perform i'm like are you fucking kidding me that's i
think if you gave me another attempt at guessing i don't think i ever think i would i'd get to it
they're emotional like and they had like diagrams like i don't know what a fucking gas meter looks
like like on a scale one to five how are you feeling what do you think they uh do you think they're gonna be coachable here i'm like i don't fucking care i'm
gonna yell at them to keep running i'll make sure their physical meter is down here if they're
emotionally they're giving me this level of fucking sass um it was just it's like they're
not gonna be coachable they're not gonna be nice like no shit um and then the other one my favorite was
you know it was like interactive diagrams like oh click on this and you'll see like this stat
or whatever oh yeah and it was like click on uh each topic and see where kids rank it in importance
and it was like having fun learning new skills winning and like let's say like hanging out with
your friends or whatever it's like i hope winning wasn't last having one was number two
um friends was like six learning new skills was four guess what number winning was i hope it's
not 55 if you can name me 54 better things you know what i'll give you having
fun at that age can be number one i'll give you that well i can see friends too because uh they
need a spot to hang out but fuck it fuck your friends half them i've watched these kids they
don't seven eighth doesn't talk to each other okay that's a different fifth and six will talk
to their kid their friends more in the hallway before practice
than seventh and eighth will
in the next four months.
Oh, boy.
55.
You can give me 53
minus the having fun,
things that are better than winning
while playing sports.
If you would just give me 53 different,
I keep doing three,
like I'm not putting the five on.
But if you can give me 53 things,
that are even better.
Just like,
I don't even think there are 53 things about sports.
There might be 10,
might be five.
It's like playing, winning, exercise, fun, and friends.
That's it.
I think that's the main one.
Six, parents, get ready.
But then add 50 more, then there's winning.
What are the 53 other things ahead of between having fun and ahead of winning?
That's a good list.
Give me something.
Winning, oh, my God.
There's no end.
What loser fucking kids who filled this out were like,
winning's number 55.
Bullshit.
Yikes.
Winning wasn't even on that list they gave them.
So you still need help at the coaching level?
Yeah.
Do you want to go change the U.S. lacrosse curriculum?
I'm probably gonna get
like i have to still have done my background check they might look into me now to be like
i'm gonna hold on posting this episode oh boy i honestly i don't i don't understand it like there's
winning would be i mean i play sports because i enjoy it and then i want to have fun like that
makes no fucking sense to me i mean granted the whole
the whole reason i still play like call of duty and shit is still to win i don't know yeah you
don't log on to any game ever like you know what i hope i die every fucking time i play i hope i do
the same thing right off the rip every time i don't get any better i hope i don't learn yeah
like okay i'll even put like, you know, learning new skills.
But that's fucking winning.
Like winning is because you're learning.
That goes hand in hand with that.
It goes hand in hand.
But like you don't log in and call me.
Like, you know what?
Or Minecraft.
No one's going to see the Minecraft bit of this because the cameras are fucked up.
Yeah.
But no one logs into any of that and i hope i never beat this game even that
i mean i think you'd still want yeah i have the biggest house this is my flex exactly quote unquote
winning but oh my god can you imagine that you buy the new call do you go i just hope i never play
i'm gonna buy this game i bought all the equipment the xbox, the controllers, the cords, the TV, a gaming chair.
But you know what?
I hope I never play the game. Now that investment with how much I'd say gaming has taken off, it's like you need, unless you're quote unquote having fun, but you need like a bomb ass headset to hear even a fucking in-game character fart.
and a fucking in-game character fart,
you need to have a gaming chair to be in the best position or most comfort
because obviously everything takes time now.
I mean, you have a Warzone game taking 30 minutes
and then everyone's always playing like a lot.
Those games take 30 minutes?
If you make it to the end, yeah,
it'll take about 30 minutes.
And then, I mean, yeah, like you said,
the controllers, people are trying to push PC.
That's two grand alone.
Like that's just thousands of dollars. My brother's got a brother's got a pc yeah just have fun i don't know like again you're having fun and you're not gonna win we should have fun but yeah that shouldn't be the only thing but like
that's that should not be the like i just want to have go fuck yourself imagine being the kid's parents who said like,
I don't want to care if I win.
I'm like,
I just spent a thousand dollars.
I road trip every fucking weekend.
You don't even try and get better.
You don't play five stores for this shit.
You don't play.
You don't care that your team wins.
You're wolfing down fucking hot dogs at halftime.
Like you were doing fucking nothing.
Why are you here?
Like that?
That's just not it.
Yeah. I don't know. I think that's just something i don't see eye to eye with so oh my
god i've never i was i keep looking over the camera i remember going and there were they gave
other things too like i'm not gonna go farther into it but like things you should say to your kids or like i can't tell a kid he has talent by
the way because it suggests that other kids don't have talent i'm like that's exactly what i'm saying
like if i tell the one kid that's and puts it past the goalie hey you have talent i am telling the
kid that's thumbing his ass in the corner you don't have talent you're meant for a different industry this ain't it um and i i get the general principle for some
of these things but it's like we are going we're babying them i mean these kids are going to be
wrapped in bubble wrap and on high doses of medication after this i mean that's a little far
but i mean if we constantly baby them it's it's
who knows let's put it this way my kids are in for a rude way yeah i uh i don't i mean i agree with you i don't think um i think winning or if you're looking at games winning should definitely
be number one but getting better at the end or doing something that just isn't a waste of time
i would even say winning doesn't need to be number one at that level.
Yeah.
Like, up until, like, middle school, even freshman year when you're not playing varsity,
like, you definitely should, like, really try and win.
But, like, you definitely want to improve so you win when it, like, really counts
and you're going to remember it.
Third and fourth grade, like, yeah, they want to have fun. Like, that is priority number one. I'd be like, have fun. We going to remember it third and fourth grade like yeah they want to have fun like that is priority number one i'm like have fun we want to grow the sport bring them back
yeah but then it's like they all part of having fun is winning if they're getting their ass
handed to them the whole time like there's no way it's 55 there's no way there's no shot this is
fun like i don't care any level like winning is the highest it should ever be is like five.
Well, I mean, I can stop by and see how well practice will go for you
and then go from there.
What place do you just see me beating my head with my stick?
Clipboard just over your head all the time.
No, what the fuck?
No, it's – I'm a recruit i because i talked to chad um because i baby oh my god i gotta tell you this
but i tried to recruit uh i'm going to chad and then you and then anyone else that wants to come
out and just kind of like maybe i'll organize it with one of the coaches like hey i'm gonna bring
a bunch of old like the og franklin lacrosse players bring a bunch of old heads a bunch of old, like the OG Franklin lacrosse players. Bring a bunch of old heads.
A bunch of old heads, like one guy smoking cigs, probably crushing beers.
But no.
Okay, this Chad thing.
So when I was talking to Chad about the lacrosse stuff, right before he left for, his brother just got married.
So last week he went to his brother's wedding.
Yeah.
And Chad,
when you're listening to this,
if you ever do,
I'm apologizing right now.
Didn't break anything.
Not going to cost you anything,
but I may have embarrassed your dog just a bit.
So he's like,
can you just watch my dog for like a day and a half?
I'm like,
yeah,
of course.
So day one, yeah, of course.
Day one, I go.
First day, I go and I let him out around noon.
I just got back from the gym. I just go straight to his house.
It's right by his house.
I let the dog out.
The dog's peeing.
I go, fuck, I kind of have to pee too.
Oh, no.
I bring him in, take him off his leash
he goes kind of plays with his phone i go to the bathroom the only one in the house i leave the
door open i'm peeing as one normally would and i hear this going chad sorry i hear the dog coming
i'm like oh what's up, Luke?
And I'm thinking, like, Chad's trained him enough because he left me a list of things. Like, he knows all these commands.
He doesn't know how to roll over that well.
I'm telling you that right now.
And so I'm peeing.
I'm trying to get in camera.
I'm peeing.
And all of a sudden, like, I come feeling behind me.
I'm like, there's no way.
And then all of a sudden, his head just goes.
Oh, no. It pops in between my legs.
And I go, I have never pinched a piss so hard in my life.
And I go, oh.
But he stuck his head so far out.
And just at the very end, I kind of may or may not have pissed on a dog this weekend.
It hit him right in the nose.
I go, oh, shit.
And then I'm like, dude, what the fuck are you doing? And I push him right in the nose i go oh shit and then i'm like dude what the fuck are you doing i push him out of the way and i like i get him out and i like try and finish and then
he runs back in i'm like oh my god this one i'm like i'm about to piss all over the fucking toilet
and then i am like i push him out i was like screw it i hold it. Whatever that causes damage to me, I'm done. Like, I'll take it.
And I go, and I'm like, all right.
I clearly pissed a little on the toilet.
I got to clean it up.
And the dog runs in again and tries to lick the toilet water.
I'm like, dude, I haven't flushed yet.
The dog is just wiling out.
I'm like, I grab by the collar.
I'm like, thank, he didn't drink my piss, Chad.
Okay.
But I may or may not have kind didn't drink my piss, Chad. That's good.
I may or may not have kind of
tinkled on his nose.
I think you got to wash the nose, Chad.
No, I did.
I took a washcloth. I wiped him off.
He's good to go.
If he kind of
has
an inkling to follow you to the
bathroom now, he may or may not like it he
kind of your dog has a piss fetish okay your dog has a piss you need to close the door or you know
heads will be in places that you don't want them to be yeah i've learned i learned real quick because
i went to the bathroom the next day i was like i'm closing this fucking door and he was pawing
out i'm like dude please no please stop Just see him bust it down.
No, that's been life lately.
You got any new things?
We don't have to do this too long.
We're already an hour.
Oh.
Isn't that quick?
We'll have to have you on again because we'll do a boozy one.
Those get real fucking fun.
Yeah, I was listening to the Chads today, funny enough we just talked about him but um yeah i think you guys are pounding like mixed drinks or something yeah
it was right after his birthday and we were just at we the we were just having like um
fuck orange juice he was doing whiskey something but i always i said well i started doing this
with braxton i was like yeah i can do this easily i mean i don't shut the fuck up as you can tell but i can do this easily without booze but like like the first four of
this one i was like yeah i was drinking in all of them and i have no problem having a few drinks but
i do want to do another one that i did with braxton it's saved in my computer we got blasted
in here oh boy i don't remember i mean i've done two where i've gotten blasted first one i did with sam in miami i don't remember ending it i woke up on the bathroom floor like we had 11 shots
of tequila each it was not good um good lord i don't know the cameras can be on for that one
how to be out but um no we'll get you on again we'll do a little boozy one i'll have to start
learning how to edit out all the, all the like,
just like subtle cuts,
but you just like through the whole,
this whole session.
It's like,
I don't know how to blur.
So it's just like clip art over every time.
Don't mind like the 50 edits.
It's a fucking seizure waiting to happen.
But yeah,
no,
I appreciate you doing this.
This is fun.
I know.
Thanks for having me get you home.
Awesome.
Meyer.
Here's your,
uh,
here's your first episode in a few months. Hopefully I have this tomorrow morning but if not i'll be out friday and i'll be looking forward to it all right giving a look how i look
on my first podcast i think you did just fine thank you buddy