Fat Chance Podcast - Hot Boy Summer #1

Episode Date: July 6, 2023

Fat Chance Studios and Podcast is putting on the first ever Fat Chance Scramble Classic benefiting both the MS Society and Beat Foundation! Michael, Judd and Jack will be your Fat Chance Hosts all summer long to promote this event in an effort to make this something we can do every year and hopefully bring more awareness to each foundation.

Yeah, you instantly went right for that. We were just like, hey, Jackson's kind of going to be stripping. You're like, give me flag, bunghole, now. Please, will you put something in my anus, please? And... You paused your white screen. You paused the white screen. Pause your white screen. Also, what white screen. Pause your white screen.

Also, what does the little bump in the middle mean? Someone probably skipped to the... It's gone now. They probably skipped past the intro and got to the good part. Yeah, make sure there's volume on it. Thank you. I couldn't hear it before. I was worried.

Did you prepare for this as well? I did. God, you are amazing. You prepared? I prepared. He prepares for his podcast. I don't. Yep.

I got the stuff. That's it. That's important. That's important. Jack, what did you prepare? His lunchbox. I brought my two beers. I brought my beers, and now I have my lemon drops because I'm trying to quit nicotine.

So every time I get the itch, these are actually not sour enough to deter me. I have high chews. They're not sour at all. What is your thought process to be like a dog with a spritz bottle? Like, don't do that? So you're like trying to pain your mouth? No, I think it's... With candy?

Yeah. You said it's not sour. More sour, I think, would just be something else to focus on rather than pain. It's like, ooh, that is sour. Yeah, well, I went to the gas station. I want toxic waste. You remember those things? Toxic waste was really good.

It's basically warheads. Okay. But it's just like a different name. And those were really sour. I want those. Because once you get past the five minutes of thinking about it, you're pretty much good. And then it will come up like later in the day like in the night

yeah so just like if I have something sour and I'm just like oh fuck is that sour you know what I mean like that's all I need to worry about

fuck I need a cigarette after that that was sour someone get me a decaf coffee and a cigarette right now I gotta I gotta wind down

but yes that's my that's my thought process these are too sweet you don't need a cigarette right now you can just go outside pretty much. Oh, yeah.

Dude, that was bananas. I think I got a lemon. Do you want to just suck on a lemon the rest of the time? Oh, yeah. You should just go straight to the fruit. Should I just cut you in half? Cut you some lemons. Just eat the whole thing, rind and all.

Fucking do it. As soon as I get through this one, I'm going to be like, oh, that nicotine would be quite nice. That's right. Oh, yeah. Now do you do, is it cigarettes or is it tobacco? Like pouches or vapes.

I used to do chewing tobacco in college and I had a dream about quitting one day and I woke up and I didn't do it again. It was really weird. That's some Dalai Lama shit.

How many people wish they had that? It was so cool and then like freshman year of college, some guy, or no, not freshman year, like junior year, one of some guy or no not freshman year like junior year One of my friends like handed me a jewel and I didn't know what it was and I ripped it and I was like I want that

That you know you have an addictive person after one taste check. I'm gonna do this the rest of my life I need to go like how do you think they made the jewel like someone's like hey a Battery but with nicotine in it just fucking suck on it that's what that it is you ever find a loose usb drive what if it smoked that'd be sick it was it was it was amazing that was like a life-changing thing for me not in a good way i used to go i refused to get into trends and got like it bothered me when fidget spinners you're so hip you were hip when you did the jewel ass wipe i didn't know what it was when it came out he just handed to me i was

like oh what is this i ripped it so you sucked on it yeah but now look at you do you do that if i handed you a foreign object would the first thing you do is suck on it if it was supposed to be sucked yes oh that he told you it's supposed to be sucked well he sucked it in front of me so i was like that's how you do it if someone put it in your lip and was like, hey, put this in your lip, I would do it. Anything. Not everything. Like, I'm sure, like, if you handed me a penis, I'd be like, not today. What have you seen it suck before you, though?

If it had nicotine in it? If it had nicotine in it? We'll talk. If it had nicotine in it? It sucked in front of you. I have to watch. It's a milligram dick. You know what you have?

It's got to be more milligrams than that if I'm doing it. I'm glad I didn't get into that at all. Yeah, very lucky. Whoever, don't do it. It's been a nasty, filthy habit. Were you ever, did you ever have like the diesel rigs? Like the one that you basically fist it? No.

No, I just had the little ones. And then like when I tried to quit dueling, because dueling was kind of expensive Like I'd go through two pods In like a day So that's like Ten dollars a day Really?

Yeah Jesus Christ Shit And then even when I went down To one pod a day It was still like Five dollars a day Oh good

And then I So then I got a posh For a while And those were like You could smoke the shit Out of those For like probably A week and a half

What's your biggest vice Like what's the most money You spend on Probably yearly Is it cigarettes Or is it alcohol It would be But I mean

It used to be I'm like In the fluctuation Of like going back and forth With vaping Or pouches This is like my first time I'm trying this

Hopefully it works But my biggest vice It would be alcohol I mean Oh alcohol for sure The only reason Why I spend more money vaping or poaches this is like my first time trying this hopefully works but my biggest advice it would be alcohol I mean the only reason why I spend more money on alcohol is because like I if I'm ever going to like a place for the most part unless I might have to like drive home or like be responsible I'm bringing extra just in case we run out okay so like I'll still have extra home but yeah I would say coffee is my my like really like i spend way too much money on coffee i think but is that really a vice you do

it all the fucking time you wake up in the morning like i need my fucking coffee you know i got addicted to it from i think just caffeine in general not coffee yeah i switched to uh it took me a while but i switched to tea in the morning yeah answer was cocaine i got nose tea in the morning nose tea it's great energy drinks is a big one i would also agree with that energy drinks used to be a big one for me i like if i'm out drinking i'll do a i'll do a vodka red bull what kind of tea you doing ginger lemon what the fuck i know it's so not into fads repeat not not into fads okay how many tapestries do you have on your wall what the fuck two in my bedroom i can't believe i called that first time i came in that was amazing now it's just sitting on my counter.

Is there more money in it now? No, I deposited the last bag. How much was in the last bag? I'm telling people that you have bags of money just laying around. We've done it every time he's here. What is this? The last bag? The first time I sat down, I go, I sat down and I was like, how many just bags of money do you have laying around in your apartment? He goes, I actually have one sat down and I was like, how much, how, how many just bags of money do you have laying around in your apartment?

He goes, I actually have one right now. I was like, Oh my God. What are you? Scrooge McDuck? What the fuck? The last, the last one. He pulled a brick out of the wall and behind it was money. The last one was a few grand.

My, my grandpa, when my grandpa passed away, we found that he had like thousands of dollars stuffed in his mattress. That's a real thing. My grandpa's already admitted to us. He has hundreds of thousands of dollars like in his walls. And we're like, every time we go, I'm like, just start knocking on the walls. Put a hole somewhere. Anyone that's like close to the Great Depression does not trust banks.

Yeah, he's not. He's from Europe. He grew up poor. He's just in the walls and we're like where is it he's i don't know we're like what do you mean there's always money in the banana stand it's gonna suck so bad when you have to like knock all the holes in so many holes in your walls so you can find that money because he didn't he didn't leave like a map oh no it's gotta be like national treasure map he's got so much stuff too it's he's got it's like three different houses he bought a campground because he could like he ordered so I don't know if there's return people pay $15 for a spot there I don't think so but no no one lives there

people just like squat there and it's got its own little mini lake uh lake house it has like people used to drive up pages camp there it's got a basketball court and all that i'm like dude we could do something with this he's just like yeah but it's disgusting though what's what's called i have no clue. Grandpa's Lake? Camp Grandpa's Lake. Not in the patch. This is my grandpa's lake. Get off of it. He has money in his walls. Yeah.

Dude, yeah, I did have some questions that I prepared for the podcast. Was the biggest vice one of them? Or did you just go straight for my soul? I do have some for you especially. Can you see my feet in your shot? Go like this. Oh, yeah. Let me get them out.

Good. Do we all want to show our feet real quick just for everyone? Just for the fans, for the true fans. I'm only going to do one at a time. We got a nice compliment, though, Judd, on the last one. We got too many compliments on it to the point where I'm like, is it the same person? Well, no, because we need to stop bringing it up.

This is the last time we bring it up. Probably not. But they're like, the reason we like your feet is because you guys are both attractive. I was like, what a line. That's a stretch. I like your feet because you're pretty on the top yeah i think you're hot because you have huge cans you know it's like yeah draw attention to it you know but i do have some questions for you guys all right so i don't know if you guys talked about this before on the podcast but

in your lifetime, lifetime, how many beers have you drank ballpark it? Oh, fuck me. In your lifetime. We'll do about nine today and then multiply that by how many years I've been alive. You're going daily? You're going by daily? Going by daily.

That would have been easier in college to do. I don't even know where to start to do that number. Let's start with most you think you've ever drank in a night. Beers? Just straight full day. Night or beer? Span of a whole day. 24 hours.

Over 20 for sure. Yeah, probably had at least a 24-pack one time. I did my 22nd birthday. Four of us went golfing. Me, my roommate, roommate i believe my buddy connor and alex and i think on the second hole we decided i bought a case of bud light orange because it was new like let's try it didn't refrigerate it i just threw it in the golf bag and i go we should just let's just shotgun wall one to start every hole so we did 18 beers and

18 shotgun starts yeah 18 shotgun starts. Yeah. 18 shotgun starts. And then we went out afterwards. So I'm probably, I mean, I stopped drinking beer probably after that went just a shot. Cause that's, that's the right way to do it. Yeah.

Obviously. I don't know if those 18 beers are really feeling it. Let's pick it up. Most people are like, I'm pretty drunk. This Let's kick it up a notch Most people are like I'm pretty drunk You want this night to end early? No most people are like I'm pretty drunk

Let's switch to beer I'm like I'm full Let's switch to hard alcohol I would say the most I've probably done is 25 I could not actually count There's a point in my day I don't know if I've mentioned this to you guys, where it's like Bruce from Finding Nemo, and it's just black eyes,

and I just survive throughout the night. That's how I go. I have no idea how it goes. Yeah. I don't have an actual count. I mean, it's aggressively too many. When you're that, do you still keep drinking? Oh, hell yeah.

That's fun. It's really bad. yeah that's fun it's really bad it's unhealthy it's really bad i've gotten um i've peed on multiple people you look like a peer yeah i peed the bed a lot i used to have i used to set hourly alarms when i would go party to wake up to make sure i went and peed because otherwise i wouldn't i like it'd be three in the morning an alarm would go off and and I'd be like, oh, I do need to pee. I'll go pee. But if I didn't have an alarm, I would wet the bed. I wet the bed five times, and I was like, I can't count the amount of times I pissed the bed on two hands. So I have to keep it at five.

So I just started leaving hourly alarms for me until I eventually grew out of it. Because otherwise, I was going to pee the bed six times. And you can't be like, I peed the bed six times. Wait, how old were you when you had to do this? I was like 21. So you grew up. No, 19. You're already a grown adult.

Yeah, but I didn't start drinking when I was like seven. No, I didn't pee the bed back then. But it was like, yeah, I got pretty bad. There are some people that are just peers. Yeah. I got a few of those friends that, I mean, they wouldn't have to set alarms. They would just piss the bed. I set alarms so I could stop.

I was making responsible decisions. It's impressive. Like, if I was hammered and I set an alarm and it went off, I wouldn't be like, oh, pee. I'd just be like, turn this shit off. I would keep it going until I peed. Like, I would get up and sit on the toilet and, like, scroll my phone until I peed.

But it's crazy that you were blackout just hours before that. You know? Yeah, I'm sure there were some times where I went to go pee and like didn't. Did you, wait, did you have the alarm while you were partying too?

I set it before I started partying. Really? So like an hour in you'd be like, I should go pee now? No, I set it like starting at like 3 a.m.

Oh, okay. Oh, I thought you were like, it's 10 p.m. I gotta pee, babe. No. As far as the beer pong game, daddy's gotta go pee. like, it's 10 p.m., I got to pee, babe. No. Pause the beer pong game. Daddy's got to go pee. My pee alarm's going off.

It's like how girls have birth control alarms. You have a pee alarm. No, I was just trying not to pee in the bed anymore. I peed in the bed twice with my fiance, once in a hotel room, and two with my college roommate i can probably say i've never pissed the bed never ever i mean when i was little but like from drinking no yeah yeah i don't think i've ever had but i know a lot of people that do there There was a guy. Still? Yeah. Yeah. My buddy pissed on my laptop just now.

What the fuck? Was it in the bed with him or did he stay in the bed with him? No, no, no. He was staying at my place, my one-bedroom apartment, and couldn't find the bathroom, opened my laptop, peed on the laptop, then closed the laptop. Like a toilet. Like a toilet and then

went back to sleep that's so ridiculous yeah and then I took it to fucking Apple and it was like yeah I think it spilled

Gatorade on it this Mac smells a lot like urine that's ridiculous yeah that's amazing what other thing

happens is when you get that drunk and you're blacked out like even like the you know how like when you're not drinking just like let's just say on a monday night you haven't done anything you just go to bed and you wake up in the night because you have to pee when you're that blacked out like or at least when i was i was so aggressively blacked out that like nothing would wake me because i peed all over myself didn't wake up my fiance was in bed with me she was my girlfriend at the. And she was trying to wake me up because I was peeing all over her.

And she was slapping the shit out of me and like beating me up to try to get me to wake up. And I wouldn't wake up. I did not wake up until 9 a.m. the next morning. And I was completely dry. And I just left.

I had no idea. Like she cleaned up all around me. I had no idea I peed. And she goes, you fucking peed all over me last night. And she was like, and I literally couldn't move move you like i couldn't get you to roll over wonderful woman though just be like all right no she was pissed but she was she was quite gracious wow what a what a term to use then fuck she was pissed as shit

all right how much ice cream do you think you've eaten in your lifetime how many beers Pissed as shit. All right. How much ice cream do you think you've eaten in your lifetime? You didn't answer how many beers. Beers? Oh, probably in a day. I probably drank, back in college, probably close to 30, I would say, in a 24 span. I've personally seen a friend of mine shotgun a 30 rack in a day at Country Thunder. Is he still alive?

I think there's been some. Braxton. You know Braxton? Maybe. He might have been at Caden's wedding. I don't know. I don't know. I was also pretty intoxicated at Caden's wedding.

But like, I think, I mean, if you think about it. Congrats to the beautiful couple. 24 hours. There's times where you just get day drink the entire time, but you don't start it like until 10, but then you wake up in the morning entire time but you don't start it like until 10 but then you wake up in the morning first thing you do is have some more beer

yep you have to wake up in the next morning and have beer you have to yeah chase the dragon because I went to a bachelor party and I had to go golf the next morning

and I was like I'm buying like four beers from the like the cart girl just because like I need them

because otherwise you're back to equilibrium yeah you're always going to have the Cart girl just cuz like I need him because I was Gonna have the shakes Same thing we're at a bachelor party when you're going to go golfing in the morning and he didn't even make it Through the kitchen of the Airbnb. He slept on the floor straight of the Airbnb. He slept on the floor straight down. He wakes up in the morning and we're like, just is the time we need to go for golf.

And he goes, give me some beer. I need to get this. I need to set this straight. And he golfed amazing out of his mind. I'm telling you, your best golf is when you're not drunk, but you're either that hair of the dog, I'm feeling myself moment or two to three beers deep. Absolutely. The issue is keeping that

and because it's a slippery slope. Once you start it is I have the problem with getting to the point where I should stop or slow down

and just not realizing it because I just want to finish the drink because it's getting warm. Same. Yeah. So I do it.

So it's always gets so bad so I have to like I'm trying to become more of a grown up young man and figure out how my body operates. For the sake of my relationship and my loved ones and my friends. I mean, you locked it in though. Yeah, I hope you find your body. I hope you grow into it.

She could still leave you. Yeah, she could wake up tomorrow and leave me. She's your manager though. She's my manager. She books all my events and plans and doesn't really book anything. Just kind of tells me where I'm supposed to be

at what time. That's a good thing to have. It's very good. I see how that works. Yeah. It's like, hey, I guess I'm doing that this weekend. But you told her,

I'm going here today. I did. I said, I'm going to bring my lunchbox. Wait, should we have gone through her? Probably should have. Yeah. Can we get her number next time? I'll give you guys her number.

Because actually, it'd be better if you guys work around her schedule. Can Jack come out and play, please? She just throws me in the booster seat and we head over. All right. What would you be in the Guinness Book of World Records for? Nothing good. I don't know why,

but I always loved those books. That's the one thing I'd go to at the school book fair. I'd be like, I want the New World Record book. But it was always like $80. It was like, I'll just wait until it comes out in the library.

I would just look at it real quick. I would just scan through all the pictures. The pictures were so wild. You'd just see some girl with gigantic nipples. You're like, wow. Counting this. The craziest fingernail guy. He's always in it.

The fingernail guy is ridiculous. The fingernail guy is so gross. The fingernail guy, that shouldn't be a world record you're going for. If that's a thing you're trying to do. The dude's married. How does he get the ring on? You ever seen those things in doctor's offices where the kids have to bring the beads

from one end to the other? That's right. I'm almost ready, honey. And he's like trying to... Wait, were you trying to... An abacus? Are you trying to play for abacus? The little kid thing where in the doctor's office

we go like, oh, bring the beat from this side to the other side, and it's like down underneath the other one, loop-de-loop. That's what it's like. I have no idea what I'd be in the Guinness whatever book for. It'd be something probably pretty sad. I mean, for me, not for you. No, it might be the dryer with the longest song.

That's what that was? That's telling me my clothes are done. It's still not over. That sounds like the alarm I set to not pee myself. Hold on. I can't believe that's still going. Yeah. It's a full fucking song. It's like a ringtone.

What the hell? I don't know why I always put it on when I do one of these. Always. But you know, it's when I do one of these. Always. But, you know, it's a running gag now. I like it. Do you have an idea what you would be? So I always thought I was going to be – because it was all this weird shit.

And I was like collections were a big part of it. I don't know why I thought that – like I used to collect the top. Like for school, you have to collect the top of these cans. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. And I was like, I'm going to get top of these cans and I was like I'm going to get all of them and keep them and I'm going to be a Guinness World Record

for the most tops you thought you were going to beat out the homeless guy so I was I didn't know I didn't know

that homeless people were doing that but like so I would go to like parties and like take off the top of the cans that was so dumb

how old were you for this one I was clinking with those yeah that's why they put all my cargo in there of the case. That was so dumb. How old were you for this one? at that time? I was clinking with those. Yeah. That's why they put all my cargo in there, you know?

Yeah. What is that thing specifically called? What? The tab. Is it just the tab? I bet you, does he think it has

like a very specific name? Should we give it a go? We could give it a go. Goog it up. This is when we need Josh. Put the Google machine. Yeah, Josh. When Josh comes here, he's going in the corner right there,

and I'll set up my little lapel mic, and I'll just turn it on and off when he's allowed to talk. Who's Josh? Blue Moon. Josh is when you watch the Brewery Game? Oh, yes. I remember that brave young man. I look over here.

What am I doing? What's the top of a can called? If it's a tab, this is going to be 15 minutes. I'm using my breasts to hold the microphone. I should be the one doing it because I'm hands-free. What the fuck, dude? I'm using my engorged nipples to hold this. The ring tab.

Oh, that's dumb. Don't like it. The evolution of can lids has been from a flat utilitarian top that required you to use a church key. What's a church key? It's a bunch of down, arid, and drinking holes on opposite ends of the metal top. Then came the pull tab, or ring tab. Pull it up, curl your finger underneath, and rip it off. It's a tab.

It's a fucking tab. Do you remember when they used to have the pop tabs on the middle of the cans? We're in our 20s. Pull it up, curl your finger underneath, and rip it off. It's a tab. It's a fucking tab. Do you remember when they used to have the pop tabs on the Miller Lite cans? We're in our 20s. Miller Lite used to do this thing where you pop the top so it would get more airflow. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Better for Chuck. No way. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

And then they used to do the vented cans for Coors Light. Yep, I remember that. Yeah. was light yep i remember that yeah and then we'd have like we would have drinking like the beer olympics uh and they were they had to be banned they were banned good by the way i just saw all those videos for busting with the boys doing beer olympics yeah it makes me want to do my buddies were there my buddy was there my dean so jealous midland was there that's my favorite band fucking burke kreischerischer Yeah Everyone And they actually Followed through to the end

I was watching the whole story Like they had a champion Well do you want to know why Because the people filming Weren't drinking Yeah We were talking about Like how many times

Have you tried to do a beer olympics And then two games in No one's keeping score We're like I don't Fucking Jack's peeing His alarm went off

We can't play beer pong anymore and i've i've done a couple good series of beer olympics actually we my apartment held one and we we got a big we made a big trophy that a can that's bright painted in bronze did you get to the end we got to the end but we got kicked it we lost like after like the second game and we were just like fuck you guys and we just left him in our apartment and let him finish we're like we did all this work we were just like, fuck you guys and we just left them in our apartment and let them finish. We did all this work. We even made medals for everyone that

medaled in the thing. The most sore-ass loser I've ever heard in my entire life. Fuck you guys. You can still party at my apartment. We made up this game

and we want to get out of here. Have fun though. You're just storming out. Here's my phone to play music. Put your own fucking phone to play music no put your own fucking phone to play music yeah at that point when we were out

of the running we were like we're gonna get this we're gonna make this nice trophy so we can have it in our apartment and then we

like got smoked I like case races case races would be fun case races are fun case races would be fun but then there's no you have to have activities during it too

like it's kind of like beer olympics but you have to make people do something. We did a COVID case race. So everyone's on film, which is why. We should do some drinking aspect for this tournament. Just really make us liable for everyone driving when they go home. We're driving the golf carts. That's dangerous.

I'm thinking about reserving the last spot. Beer you? What do you want? Why'd you whisper it? I was just I was You don't want to interrupt your story You can just do this Beer me

Right? Can you do that? Does that work? Beer me You can turn the microphone off Maybe they're in SM We got Truly Lemonades

Pacifico Whatever's easiest to grab I'm right here Yeah He is in fact right here Are Yeah. He is, in fact, right here. Are you right there? He's right there. He'd have to get his world record for being closest to right there.

Pacifico. I need the bottle opener for this. Yeah, you are going to need the bottle opener for that. Should we just now just announce we're doing the golf tournament? Like this is why we're doing this? Yes. Well, we can. Let's finish this.

Actually, we should probably do it early off the top. Yeah. Well, for one, it is going to be us three for, in my mind, the foreseeable future. At least the next – I would like to do at least the next six weeks. Yeah. You're going to really have to check with my manager. We're going to have to plan ahead, boys. foreseeable future at least the next i would like to do at least the next six weeks yeah you're gonna really have to check with my manager we're gonna have to plan ahead boys we're gonna have to really have to plan ahead you gotta find a weekend for you and just really get after it

one of these oh we could probably do two in a row if we do a weekend we could probably do two like just do two episodes in a row yeah that'd be fine yeah we'll change shirts we get real show business see just like, all right, cut it. Let's do it again. Cut it. All right, actually, you haven't seen me in six days.

Oh, face change. But no, you guys are the most. We all just swap clothes. Like you're wearing a volleyball. Like a volleyball line. You just go to the left. So we're definitely doing that. That's a good thing.

Wear something ridiculous. Honestly, it should be just the same podcast to see if they notice the cuts. That's fucking great. That would be so fun. You guys are the most fun I've had doing episodes in a very long time. I'm just you three.

It's us three from here on out for a while. Yeah. This is just going to be fat chance podcast. I like doing it. I like talking shit. You got to tell B-Wine. I'm sorry, Brandon. Yeah.

I don't know what I'm sorry for, Brandon. Brandon, I'm sorry that you wear your hat backwards too much. I'm sorry that you grew up in Germantown or wherever you grew up in. I apologize for Brandon. Do you want to give him a message? Yeah, do you want to apologize to Brandon real quick? Are you formally leaving You Broke It show? I'm formally here, maybe, but I don't know.

I think you can be on the show. I don't think there's any. I can't have two of them. Then I'm a traitor. My girlfriend's going to be pissed. I can't be on two weeknight podcasts that don't bring home the bacon. Dude, you're just going to be getting drunk on Tuesdays now. Technically, I can pay you.

Just can't pay you a lot. I'm good. That's a very funny way to get drunk. Honey, I'm podcasting. That's what you should see. So before I started doing comedy, I did streaming on Twitch. Because that was kind of like my entry into it. And it was right when COVID happened.

And so basically what I would do I would do the hard seltzer stream and I would just basically play Call of Duty. I've seen some of these he gets wasted. I get fucking hammered. I get so hammered

and then like I'd wake up in the morning like on the floor like there was puke on the ground and it was like in the middle of COVID in the middle I did not pee

because I grew out of it by that point but I was like in the middle of COVID and so then a girl would she be like what are you doing? I of it by that point. I was in the middle of COVID. My girl would be like, what are you doing? I was screaming.

I made $4 off ads. I did spend $30 on hard seltzers. I got the booze on discount. I almost paid for it. I was going to do it anyway. That was pretty bad. I was like, hey, honey, I was That was pretty bad It was like Hey honey I'm playing video games For money

Let me get hammered What video games Did you play Call of Duty Call of Duty a lot Were you good I got good after a while Because I played so much

Okay Were you better drunk Because you didn't Get that much drunk Do the people like it If you're good or bad Because like I've seen streamers

And they're like Real shitty And everyone's like Oh this is funny If you're good or bad because like i've seen streamers and they're like real shitty and everyone's like oh this is funny if you're like a good enough entertainer i think people like it okay it's like i would get like probably like three or four viewers and like most of them are probably my friends so it was like also fun because then they would just talk shit to me the whole time and i would drink and then after like a bunch of friends joined on then other people would like see like okay this guy's viewer count's not bad. And then they would join in. I had a couple people that would tune in every time that I didn't know, which is cool. Just, like, playing

video games and getting drunk, and they were talking shit back, but... Are you in the chat? Yeah, I'm in the chat. Oh, nice. That's sick, dude. That was fun. I feel like Call of Duty, you'd want to see good people. It'd be really boring to just watch someone, like, spawn, die, spawn, die. I wasn't that bad

because it was Warzone. I've never played Warzone. Warzone's so much fun, but I haven't played in a long time. I also played UFC a lot. And I was in like a tournament league where they would put cards together against people and have them seated. And that was fun. That's where I got most of my views. Did you build your own character at least?

No, you would just choose a weight class and you'd fight against someone else. They'd choose their character. then well you weren't like you like it wasn't a picture of you no i would just like they had our cameras and then we would like talk shit to each other while we're fighting and then they would be streamed live that's where i got a lot of my views from because i'd like be getting hammer talking shit and like playing ufc that was a lot of fun because there was like a lot of more background work that went into it like people would make posters and stuff that was fun i didn't have to do any of the, like, work, though. I just, like...

I think it'd be fun. I know people do, like, the VR boxing. Ooh, that'd be fun. Streaming that and watching someone, like, have a camera on you just in your living room punching nothing. Just watching someone get... Just getting your shit right the whole time.

Watching someone get dizzy. I don't think you have to fake like you're getting hit. You never know how good the VR is. It just shocks you every time you get punched. If there was like haptic feedback that was really good, I think I would get into VR. If I could get a concussion from it, I would be so in.

You know how much more fun boxing would be if it wasn't just like the Wii boxing? You remember that? Yeah, are we supposed to have that up? No, it's just for my sanity, making sure it still works. The amount of times I've done one of these, and I'm like, oh, the cameras weren't on. Just so everyone knows, his screensaver is just Michael's MacBook Pro. You make that in Microsoft Paint?

What is going on? No, that's what they gave me. That's what they gave you? That's what came straight out of the box. You think I made a new screensaver for my laptop no i a thousand percent think you did it came straight out of the box look how shitty that is the logo is so far off no that's what they no it rotates it's like the

dvd thing that's so funny look at how shitty that is. You definitely did it. Absolutely not. It's so good. I wouldn't even know how to do it. I have to Google how to do half the shit with my computer. The other day, I was like, how do you take a screenshot on a Mac? And I did it on a Windows. And they're like, we would like you to buy our product now. I'm like, whatever.

But I don't do anything with my computer. Can I show you guys my roommate's new apartment? Yeah. He almost killed himself, by the way, before the episode. He did make his smoothie in the bathroom. That was weird, right? Very. He could have just done that here.

We're not going to start until you're done. He goes, I'm still going to do it in the bathroom. Yeah, he went in the bathroom to make a smoothie. We're all like, oh, oh he's definitely gonna take a bath no he's been so he's moving at the end of july he has to be in new york early uh august and he's looking at apartments disgusting by the way how much it costs to live in that city i mean he's a one bedroom minimum three grand a month plus you have to pay the broker's fee which is anywhere from like five to ten percent of what you pay for the year

so just basically add it on so you're paying an extra thirty six hundred for the year what he sent me before or he made me sit down and goes, you need to look at this. I was telling you, the kitchen, the wall between where the door would open for the oven and the wall was maybe a foot and a half. Like, you can't open your oven. You can't. You turn around, you hit the wall. This is the latest one he sent me.

This was listed four years ago. This is how popular New York is is people are willing to live there just read what it says the description on the top welcome to your bathroom kitchen living room slash how bathroom slash kitchen we call that a bitchin'. It is a stove next to a fridge, and then you take a right about four and a half feet, and it's a tub that you would have to put a curtain that goes around just so the water doesn't hit your kitchen floor. This is a storage unit with windows.

It is, yes. But it's like we have all these old appliances. That was $2,000. Also, look at that stove. Is it a nice stove? That's a sick stove. It's a hip stove. That's like a one.

If you cut your stove in half and just have one burner. How often do you see just the stove? There's no counter next to it all. It's just a lone stove. And then there's a sad cabinet right next to it. It looks like a high school locker. The best part is the bedroom is probably right where they took the picture.

He probably took the picture from his bed. They just lay him sleeping down in the bath. People live there though. For how much? What was that four years ago? $19.50. $2,000 a month. But you're doing more stuff down in New York. When you're in New York, you're barely at your fucking place.

You know what I mean? Yeah. Do you hope so? Imagine bringing a lady back New York, you're barely at your fucking place. You know what I mean? Yeah. Do you hope so? Imagine bringing a lady back. Yeah, you've got to be out of your place because they've got to fumigate it. You do the dirty. And she goes, I need to pee. You're like, I'll be right here. Don't worry.

I'll turn the shower on for you while I finish making your eggs. Well, you don't have to iron any of your clothes because it's already steamy enough in there. I mean, it's... That's wild. Four years ago, that was two grand a month. That's probably three grand now. Wow, you can make some pasta and draw yourself a bath at the same time. You can make yourself pasta in the bath.

You'll do one special. Al dente. It's an efficient apartment. I'll give it that. That's an Italian bath. al dente it's an efficient apartment i'll give it that that's an italian bath mama mia we got some raviolis oh man what else you got on that all right uh so i have a game for you guys it's called fake sarasoli i'm so in now uh usually I like to find information about the guests.

Oh, this sucks. He roasts me big time. He roasts you too? Yeah, he goes, how many of you played high school football? So I literally got Michael's high school football stats up one time. He goes, how many interceptions do you think you had? None. You had none?

You recorded her back. Well, it's Jack. You were very hard to find. Sneaky boy. But there is a Jack Sarasoli in Neenah, Wisconsin, who sadly passed away. And we are going to guess all about that Jack Sarasoli's life. All right.

I love this. Jack Sarasoli. When did he pass away? At what age? Kuski, first. December 6, 2003. Now, what age? What age?

68. I was going to go 62. 62, 68? Yep. Nope. Jack Sarasoli passed away 69. 69. All right.

How did Jack Sarasoli die? 69. I had no idea. I was born in Ninos. Maybe they just changed up the name. Cardiac arrest. Cardiac arrest. Cardiac arrest. Okay.

Fatal car accident. Incorrect. A brief illness. It said a brief illness. It was like brief. Copped once. All right. He had a bunch of kids.

I'll give you a point for he had, I think it was eight kids. I'm going to look it up. He had eight kids. I'll give you a point for each kid. Tina, Tammy, Tyler. No, no, no. They're pretty basic names. And I'll let, Kuski, you can go first with one name at a time.

Michael. Incorrect. Michael. Fuck. Incorrect. Fuck. Mark. Incorrect. Ashley. Incorrect.

Damn it. Clark. Clark. Incorrect. You guys are so close. You guys are... Steven. You're getting farther away. Incorrect.... Steven. You're getting farther away.

Incorrect. How the fuck are we getting farther away? Mitch. No. Incorrect. These are basic? Yeah, very basic names. Is there like a Jessica?

Correct. Yes, I got one. Rob. Incorrect. Fuck. And Andrew. No, incorrect. John. Brother. got one rob incorrect fuck and andrew no incorrect john who brother is john i'll give it to you i'm gonna give that to you put a little asterisk one to one okay all right we'll give you both two Okay. George. Incorrect.

Really? Dan. Incorrect. Last guess. Koski. Jack. That is correct. What a narcissist.

Jack Jr. Last guess. What a narcissist. He had a Jack Jr. Last guess? JJ. I win. I got two. I also got one. He technically got it. I will tie it up right here with this amazing guess. Brent.

Incorrect. Brent. It went Jack, Mary, Jeremy, Christopher, Rebecca, three grandchildren, Molly, Jenna, Jeremy, and Jack. Jack III. Yeah. All right. Jack was in a branch of the military. What branch was Jack in?

Air Force. Navy. Just because he's in the Air Force. National Guard. Kuski is correct. Jack in? Air Force. Navy. National Guard. Kuski's correct. It was the Air Force. In the intelligence form. Does he know about aliens? Do you think Jack knows about aliens? He might. What's the intelligence form

of the Air Force? I can see a lot from up here. No, he looks up into the sky. Well, he was only in for three years. 1968 to 1971 1971 he saw too much yeah that's what i'm saying you can't graduate college in three years you get intelligence there's something he saw where it's like it was quick maybe maybe he went under cover he was only active for those three years and that's what his brief illness was. He was too busy playing with alien technology. And that's how he died. Think about it.

But Jack went by a nickname. Jack Sarasoli went by a nickname. What nickname did Jack Sarasoli go by? Chief. Chief? Ace. Handsome Jack. Handsome Jack Sarasoli.

Dude, he's such a narcissist. Walk this guy. Dude, that's the only way I'm going to go. He's got a kid named after him, a grandson named after him. And that's how you play Fix It. I like that. That's a funny game. That was great.

Let's do that every time. Yeah, if there's more Jacksons. He's the only one alive, and he was in Nina. Yeah, it's in Nina, Wisconsin. I bet if he asked us those same questions next week, we'd still get most of them wrong. We'd get Air Force, and we'd know he died by alien technology. Did we officially announce the golf thing?

Do you guys want to officially announce it? Try it now. We should do it. Yeah. September. September 16th, the first ever, what are we calling it now? The Fat Chance. Classic.

Fat Chance Scramble Classic. I like that. Edgewood Golf Course, Big Bend, Wisconsin. Hoping to sell out both 18s. I think we can easily. I'd like people who aren't our friends there i really would i mean i want our friends it's not we will make friends with you yeah i want our friends there but i want to see if there's anyone that actually likes this and not just our feet um to show up or if you like

our feet come see him in person we should do a foot fetish hole we really should be sick everyone has to take their shoes and socks off you have have to kick the ball. Playing barefoot. It would be sick. The soccer golf hole, yeah. You have to pick the ball up out of the hole with your toes. Ooh, stop it. But, no, we've got a lot of fun stuff planned for it. A few sponsors in the works, which are going to make it even better. Yeah.

I don't think it's a – I wouldn't call it a normal scramble, but I wouldn't call it, like, I wouldn't call it a normal scramble, but I wouldn't call it like completely just balls to the walls. I mean, you're still going to golf, but I'd like to make it. I'd like it to be memorable. Like, do you remember having to do this on hole 16 kind of bullshit? Yeah. We're going to have a lot of fun. You can be good at golf and join,

but I think some of the holes are going to make it a little difficult on you. Yeah. You're going to golf. You're going to probably get probably frustrated at the ones that aren't regular golf holes. Do we give any hints as to where any of the holes are?

No. Just come out, have fun, bring your friends, or if you hate us, bring your enemies, whatever you want. Bring everybody. It's being put on

by a bunch of comedians. It's going to be a good time. We're going to have fun. We just set our vices to drink. It's going to be a good time. We're going to have fun. We just had our vices to drink. It's going to be a great time. Yeah. There will be cart girls running around. I think the cart girl, one, I want to be my mom.

That'd be so sick. Don't say that on the podcast. People are going to be like, oh, we want Koski's mom. But she has nice feet too. My mom would be ruthless to people. I can't wait. Yeah yeah i think it's gonna be fun are they actually okay when you sent gave them that thing and all my like i didn't have a ton of requests but be like can we have our own car girls can we have yeah they didn't really have any

questions they kind of really didn't look at the back part they're like uh we get i put it in and they were like all right cool and i was like yeah we have a back part with all the questions he goes all right yeah if i have any um i was like, yeah, your contact info is there. I was like, yep, our contact info is there. He said, all right, cool. I was like, we're excited. He was like, us too. And that was about it.

Sweet. Yeah. I hope they let us golf the day before and just run through the course. We probably should just a weekend before, at least a couple weekends before. I've golfed there plenty of times. But also, we should say there are charities where we're giving money to. Oh, yeah, that's also very important. Hey, guys, come get hammered outside.

There's two for sure. I'm back and forth on mine, which one I want to be. I know what I've committed to as of now, but we have MS Society, and then we have the Happy End no kill animal shelter um which is near and dear to my mother's heart so we're going to be donating to both of those um proceeds will go to both those charities and there will be opportunities for everyone to donate and contribute as well which yeah will be nice so as much raffles is it's going to be some raffles and prizes

a bunch of few golf companies. I think it might give us some prizes be alcohol. There's going to be a lot of different stuff. We're going to 50 50

some prizes an evening with Jack. Yeah, the dead one. It's going to visit Jack's grave. It's poor Bureau. There's a good man, man. We're going to visit Jack's grave He's going to bring his daughter Just pour a beer on her He was a good man man

We're going to have to contact the family Like can we get his casket please We'd like to put it on the 18th green Nice memorial service How funny that is You show up to a hall There's a bunch of people just dressed in black With a casket on the ground

Quiet please Quiet Oh man This coffin drop there's a bunch of people just dressed in black with a casket on the ground. Quiet, please. Oh, man. This coffin drop. That's what it reminds me of. Beers are going down quick. I got to be up late anyways. My girlfriend gets in at midnight, so I got to go pick her up.

She flies in? Yeah. She's going to India for two weeks. India? She's half India. She's going to India for two weeks. India? She's half India. She's going to a wedding. Wait. That's sick.

Wait a second. Did you just think she was really tan? No. Let's not put that on the camera. Don't. I do not think that. I thought she looked sun-kissed. Yeah, first of all. I didn't have to like...

I didn't see color anyways, so it's You can't be out of your lunchbox beers are gone no it's gonna have one off camera will you talk and I'll just cut For a beer That's actually happened at a golf course we We were at a bachelor party, and we brought all those beers. We brought a cooler, and we're like, fuck, we'll just fill our carts, and it'll be good. And they were the only place that I've ever seen bottles on the course. Only bottles. People have these cans. I'm a bottle fan, though.

And we get to the starter, and they're like, where'd you get that beer? I don't know. Yeah, so we had to buy bottles from the cart girl and then just pour them in. That's great. I like that. So you thought my girlfriend was what? I thought she was a very nice lady. Guatemalan.

No, I was going to say, like, what part of India? What are we talking? Don't make me look bad. When's your birthday? My next question is just all about her. If you know all her information. She's from Wisconsin. Fake Michaels already fake girlfriend.

Allegedly from India. No, a different India. She went to a different school. Wait, if you and her get married, do you have to have an Indian wedding? Oh, this is a real neutral situation. He would look really cool in those pants. Honestly?

Is it Bollywood? Is it Bollywood style? I have no idea. Let's not go wedding talk either. You're going to freak me out. This is just a question. Wait, why aren't you going to the wedding? Because it's in India.

What? Don't you need a date? There's not enough room for him on the carpet. I have to keep my mouth shut. No, it's one of those. That was all Jack Sarasota. The dead one. You want to tweet at him.

He lives in Nina. You're about to be the dead one. It's a work. There's no way. In case you want to cut that. That'd be a fun trip. I would love to go to India. In case you want to cut that. Well, that'd be a fun trip. I would love to go to India. I would love to go to India.

I think it'd be fun. There's a lot of places I'd like to go. So, she's originally from Wisconsin, obviously. But her parents are from India? Her dad is from India. Her mom is from North Carolina. Okay, so when did they move? Like, your parents met in North Carolina? Okay, so when did they move? Like your parents

met in North Carolina? Or they met in India? They met in North Carolina, I believe. That's cool. Do you talk to your girlfriend? Yeah, every day. Are you guys friends? No.

God, I'm going to get fucked. No, I met them Get her back on the podcast We need to have some questions When you When you met your fiance's parents Where did you meet them? Oh yeah

Well I met them separately Cause they're She comes from a divorced family I met my Fiance's Dad At his house He was making food.

Shirt off or shirt on? Shirt on. He's actually pretty cool. He's a good in-law to have because he's never tried to outman me or anything. Oh, yeah. He's always just been like, what's up, dude? Happy to see you again. So that was good.

And then I met her mom. I think it was at dinner. We went out and met her at dinner. But yeah, it was pretty easy and simple. I met both of them at the same time at a brewery game. And I was warned that she goes, my dad's going to bring a camera. I'm like, that's okay. Rachel, I am sorry for telling this, but I was not expecting like i was like oh he's just

gonna bring a camera take pictures of us or whatever he brought what looked like the hubble telescope showed up because she goes that's him i'm like even you're saying it um didn't talk to me at all it was me her her mom her dad and he's taking pictures the whole time but kind of complaining because the green pole like that's keeping us from falling to the third floors in the way and her mom's like just just fucking move the camera. He goes, no. And then. What does he do with the pictures?

I don't know. He just likes taking pictures. And we ended up talking about the camera and all that because I have these, and it was nice. I was like, I have something to actually talk to you about. But her mom's like, let's go get food, cheese curds, all that. And they stand up and we're just like, Hey Michael, do you want to come? And her mom's like, no, basically just leaves and then two spaces between me and her dad. And he doesn't look at me. I'm like, well,

I got to go over and say something. And we just talked about traffic and cameras until they came back. That's amazing. That was mom being like, talk. They need to talk. They need to bond. Yeah, that was mom being like, talk. But Rachel didn't even recognize it. He goes, do you want to come with us to get food?

I go, I know what your mom's trying to do. I got to do this right now. Let me go shake this man's hand and look into his lens. I did. I took pictures with it. He let me take pictures with the camera. That's bonding time right there. That's adorable.

He knows way more about cameras than I do. Yeah, no one with that good of a camera in the upper deck is going to be like. You know the cameras you see on the sidelines of a football game? Like the white lenses they extend out to here as far as you can reach. It was one of those. Do you think your wrist hurts after holding that for a while? I don't think you need to hold it, right? They got a stand. Yeah.

Yeah. Did he have a stand? No. With the green pole. That's funny. How'd you meet yours? That's a good question. Did you talk to your girlfriend? Not her parents. are they dead i don't know i've been mad i mean i've had my parents are like up north so it's like

meeting my meeting my parents going to a farm is like so unique and it's like and it's like and it's like well it's also because like mostly no you know never been on a farm before so i'm like showing like oh this is where i would walk in the field and like it was like it's just there's like atvs you go out in the woods and stuff and like we chopped wood which was unique to see like it's like a very manly type of living up there uh which i think was very funny um i don't know i don't know what i what i did for the first time i'm trying i was trying to think the whole time but you can make it up i think i'm gonna mind up i think do you think do you think your fiance's parents like you um yes i think our mom likes me for sure her dad is um a character just tolerates you no he's like

really sweet too but i think he also likes to be he just i guess yeah he does like me he talks like kind of shit to me but it's like kind of playful so i think doesn't actually mean it yeah i went way too far into it they both like me a lot i'm a really good young man i hope so you're marrying her yeah i am have you ever been to india neither is my girlfriend though oh really this is the first time yeah good thing she's leaving you yeah i don This is the first time? Yeah. Good thing she's leaving you. Yeah, I don't think the first time India meeting her family bring me. Oh, he's on.

Yes! Yes! So, okay. We got a preference. That was so good. I wonder how many people saw it. can i have this yeah so i've been thinking about that like i look at so we have a pet of the month at our apartment every month and i have been thinking about this for three months jake and the beginning of last or this past month, I put out this poster three weeks ago. Just let me finish. I put it out. I put it out three weeks ago. And I knew you left for work early. And I got up like early myself, where not a lot of people are going in and out of the elevator. And I put it in. And then I waited for the other elevator to come down and i put the other one in the other elevator look in my uh in my backpack

i have another copy this was for the other other elevator but i put them in both and i went to work it came back gone and i was like what the fuck i was like oh i put it in the day before the new month they're gonna switch it out and they just never did. Three weeks ago. Three weeks ago, and they never did. And I was like, just print off another one. And finally today, because I knew I was doing this, I'm like, I might have something to talk about. I was like, I went downstairs as I went to get them, and I put it in the elevator. You came up to work out, and they're looking at me like, he didn't see it. He didn't see it.

But for anyone who wants to zoom in,'s a milwaukee malt house pet of the month is jake and it says one could say jake is the perfect companion because there was always descriptions of these stupid fucking animals that were in our apartment they're great companions he is very loyal and even willing to pay half the rent his favorite treat is anything covered in ranch covered not dipped as you can see by the picture um is he naked with ranch is that all it is it looks like they painted a piece of pizza that's all right i thought you were in a bathtub in his free time he enjoys long walks with a good bag of mixed nuts some water in his favorite cup and exploring new restaurants all over the city if you see jake please give him a nice head scratch to say hello

but make sure to keep avocados away from him he gets an upset tummy the best part about all this is that i had our landlord write me a letter today as a recommendation and that's what they wrote. That's great. You should send them this as a PDF. It's like an employee of the month award. That's so funny.

Why didn't you leave it in? Yeah, why not? It's kind of fun. I just want my new apartment. You know people who live here? Actually, I got a DM to the Fat Chance Instagram. Someone's like, hey, I'm touring the mall house today or next week, actually. I was like, fuck.

They know where you live and they know you have bags of money. Yeah, what is going on? Why are we telling them? I've tagged the mall house in some posts. They love that, I bet. Is Michael in his money bag here? Yeah. I would like to rob him.

Did you check if we're recording? Are we recording? Oh, we're recording. Who's the loud one on the bottom? That's you. That's you. Oh, we're recording. Who's the loud one on the bottom? And that's you. That's you. Oh, hell yeah.

You're quite loud. I like that I'm the loudest one. Your voice will probably give me some issues later. Oh, this old microphone? This old thing? I project.

Every time I have you guys come on, I'm like, hit the up button because sometimes it's just dead. I think we're on like max volume for sure.

I'm on max volume right now, yeah. I think it's just on and off. I don't think it's just dead. I think we're on like max volume for sure. I'm on max volume right now, yeah. I think it's just on and off. I don't think it's on and off. You got any other questions on there? Not that it would make sense, no. What do you mean not that it would make sense? I did like the how many beers in your life, how many ice creams you've had in your life.

Oh, we didn't do that. We didn't answer that one. Ice creams, not had in your life. Oh we didn't do that. We didn't answer that one. Ice creams not a lot. Significantly less than beer. Yeah. What's your favorite ice cream? I go in moods right now it's

Rainbow Sherbert which is the weirdest thing ever. That's refreshing though. It's refreshing as hell. Yeah. I believe. That's a good one.

Let's start with this chocolate or vanilla? Vanilla. Vanilla. Absolutely vanilla. It's vanilla for sure. Chocolate probably. You agreed with me? Yeah. I mean also vanilla. You or vanilla? Vanilla. Vanilla. Absolutely vanilla. It's vanilla for sure. Chocolate, probably. You agreed with me?

Yeah. I mean, obviously. You said vanilla aggressively like you were about to... Vanilla? What the fuck? No, because most people hate that I say vanilla.

Vanilla's the best. It's so universal. You get sick of chocolate way quicker than you do vanilla. And you can mix vanilla with everything. You can also mix chocolate. Yeah, but this has to be

more chocolate-based things. You can also do chocolate. Yeah, but this has to be more chocolate-based things. You can also do, like, maybe some fruits. But my fiance likes chocolate protein powder. And I go, always get vanilla. Because guess what? You can put chocolate into it. If you want chocolate, you can put peanut butter into it. If you want just something that's peanut butter,

you can put chocolate and peanut butter in it. If you want chocolate, peanut butter. The first thing I did. You can never go back to vanilla. My girlfriend does the same thing. All chocolate, protein powder. I'm like, vanilla goes better with all fruits. This is what you got to do. This is what I did you can never go back to vanilla my girlfriend does the same thing all chocolate protein powder I'm like vanilla goes better with all fruits

this is what you gotta do this is what I did the first thing I ever did was get a big old thing of chocolate protein

powder let it get half way then ordered a big thing of vanilla vanilla powder and just poured

it in there so you have half and half like a twist did you do that with milk shake it all up you're like

straight from the cow milk and you get one of those chocolate cows but you just shake it up and then You're like straight from the cow milk and you get one of those chocolate cows. But you just shake it up and then you get a twist. And then the next thing you know, you have an empty or a half vanilla one. You get a chocolate one.

You just go every other and you shake it up. It's amazing. But I feel like the chocolate ends up outweighing the vanilla. All you're doing is just getting less chocolatey, whatever. It's still chocolate. But you're getting vanilla. But chocolate is a more powerful flavor, I believe. That's why it's better.

No. Chocolate power. Yeah. It's better. Like, if it's better or different, in a different but better way. Yeah. I don't know. If you're overpowered, it's the better one.

Are we talking about protein powder right now? Yeah, we are. I think so. In a wrestling match, if it's the better one. Are we talking about protein powder? Yeah, we are. I think so. In a wrestling match, if it's Chocopher's Banal. Search dominance is always the number one. My favorite one, I've been digging pistachio. Kind of for the same reason, I think. Protein powder?

No, ice think. Protein powder? No. Ice cream. Oh. Where the fuck did you find that? I'm sure they make it. No, I had a really good protein powder back in the day that was Fruity Pebbles. Have you had the pistachio cream ale from Indeed? Yes.

We went for that. That was so fucking good. It's so good. You got to get it straight from the brewery, though. Yeah. Yeah. It was really good. I like that a lot.

Would you ever take the podcast to a brewery? Like we can do this at the brewery? That'd be sick. I would love to take this outside of this fucking apartment. Yeah, now that I know where we are. It'd be so cool. Yeah. The money bag's in the room on the left.

I just stayed in. Just sitting on the counter of my bathroom. Last one was a few thousand dollars. Wonder where it's at now. Zero tomorrow. Because I know where it is. You want to wrap this up? Yeah, we can wrap it up.

What are we at? We're at a minute something. Not minute. Yeah, we're at a minute. We're at a minute. Hour and two minutes? Hour and two. That's good. That's good. That's a good podcast.. Not minute. Yeah, we're at a minute. We're at a minute. Hour and two minutes? Hour and two. That's good.

That's good. That's a good podcast. Pretty darn well, yeah. Yeah. How do we end these things? Well, we got to say, hey, please go to the link. It's the link in Fat Chance Bio. Already in there, yep.

Go sign up for a scramble September 16th. If you know me and you want to pay us directly. Venmo. Venmo. Email us. You can find it. I mean, my number's on Facebook. You text me, you're not invited.

Okay. I found his number on Facebook one day. We were doing a podcast and I found his number on Facebook. I was like, you need to take that down. I don't know how to get it off. I can't find it. I don't know how he found it. You were not taught cybersecurity when Facebook came out.

But yeah, if you want to avoid some of the fees on Eventbrite, and you know us. Or message us. Money orders, checks, telegrams come on have fun if you don't know us you expect to pay lots of fees it's really not that bad but it's uh for a foursome it really isn't expensive for what you're about to get and it's it's gonna be a lot of fun i mean we have an after party afterwards yeah we're gonna be it's gonna be a lot of fun. We're going to have an after party afterwards. It's going to be a lot of fun. Jack's stripping. I'll do a naked hole.

I'll put the flag in my bunghole. We have to talk to the manager. Also, for some reason. You instantly went right for that. We were just like, hey, Jack's kind of going to be stripping. You're like, give me flag, bunghole now. Will you put something in my anus, please? And.