Fat Chance Podcast - Paul Rudd, Henry Cavill & Dave Franco: Surviving Zombies & Legal Drama Ep.140

Episode Date: October 17, 2024

NEVER have a hangover again w/ Booze Better Supplements! Seriously, we can't recommend this enough! Use the link below to start drinking better and recovering faster! https://www.supplementsolutions.us/?ref=67FwapSjNHdTKo We have fallen in love with COMFRT Hoodies and it's time for you to do the same! Use our code for 15% off the best anxiety sweatshirt on the market! https://www.comfrt.com/MICHAEL52440 PATREON!!!! patreon.com/fatchancestudios CHECK OUT THE NEW FAT CHANCE SHORTS CHANNEL!!! @FatChanceShorts https://youtube.com/@FatChanceShorts?si=wCjiBc0ddHEYk_bs Get your Chewzie TODAY! @TheChewzie https://www.thechewzie.com Check Out The Crew: Michael - @michaelcuske on everything Judd Reminger - @juddremingerscomedy7298 @juddreminger on all others Jack - @jack_c_comedy Diego Avila - @trashpimp (photography)

I'm at work and there's this guy at the gym that grunts too much. I think we could go through a list of like stereotypes of the gym And he's just it's it's for attention, and I brought it up ago. Hey, man. We've had a few complaints that you are It sounds like you're having sex with yourself every time you lift and he's like every times like one more two more Just chill And so I brought it up to him like hey, man. Let's chill on the grunt He goes I always saw like if you're if you're not like working hard You're not gonna see the results. I go you don't need to tennis grunt every time This is a judgment-free zone. No, that's Planet Fitness

Live you the grunt alarm my gym is like heavy judgment But he's there this morning and if for some reason you watch this, I hope you're okay. But he's running on the treadmill and every step and he's happened before and I just keep looking like dude you gotta chill. He's just ugh ugh ugh. He's exhaling for like 10 straight minutes and all of a sudden I hear, doosh! And I go, oh fuck. And then one other member looks at me and goes, you had someone pass out. He finishes run, goes, oh I made it. You're running nowhere, okay? You didn't make it anywhere. You're in the same spot. Hits his head on the ground, passes out, and then I checked the cameras later, he hits his head on the ground and then his feet are running still. And I'm like, oh shit.

So I like, I run over, I help this guy, I'm like, first thing is I want him like, I thought it was like concussed neurological, I'm like, wake up, I need to see your okay, and I thought he was having a seizure too, and he just passed out, um, and then some guy's like, you need to raise his leg, I'm like, I'm getting to that, buddy. So we like raises like he wakes up. And basically, I'm like, you're not allowed in here the rest of today. You can't come tomorrow.

You need to take a break. You also need to learn how to breathe. And like random through all this stuff. Fast forward three hours later, I get a call. Music For now that we're back, we're back. I think now we have good content. I think we need to show Ted Bundy style you learning law. Yeah, exactly.

I need to... I was thinking about that like, cause I... What if I have to represent myself? Yeah, didn't Ted Bundy represent himself in court and then jumped out a window you gotta do exactly that I when you said Bundy I heard Bundy, but I heard lasso Bundy was the guy who killed people he did but he also represented himself Yeah, you learn we are implying that I may or may not have murdered someone, but you could have Allegedly well we'd he's right isn't he dead

I don't know if he's alive or anything, but I saw the Zac Efron movie of him and a couple other ones He seemed like he knew what he was doing. He actually didn't he was just so handsome and charming Yeah, which he actually really wasn't bad either, So you've got everything that he has going for you. Yeah, that was just Zac Efron. Everyone thinks that buddy's Zac Efron. Yeah, he's not. And he knew how to read, but he only knew hot button points, just key points in chapters.

You could read that, and you might be able to get away with it. Dude, I was on such a roll. I was like, you ever have a Monday, like, I'm moving today. Mondays. I woke up, I was on such a roll. I was like, you ever have a Monday where you're like, I'm moving today. Mondays. I woke up. I felt good. I was getting stuff done on my to-do list.

I was on my lunch break, and I was working out, and I get the call. And I was like, today sucks. And I spent the next four hours. We can get him a briefcase. That's how he's going to make it. Can I get a briefcase? Maybe your Halloween costume will be you being a lawyer.

Can I be a lawyer? I'd be a lawyer Like I'm the kid lawyer That's the thing is when we were at the the funerals this past week my dad We looked I'm like dude you need you need a suit you need something. What was he wearing? Well, he was still dressed up. but I go, Dad, you've worn this exact outfit to every funeral we've ever been to, my graduation, my baptism, my first communion, probably when I was born. You're going to wear it to my wedding.

You're going to wear it to Stephen's wedding. You're going to wear it to Andrew's. You need something else. Also, it doesn't fit. Don't need to be. And then the minute I walk in I had a coffee cup and my glasses right here he goes dude you got ditched a coffee the glasses I'm like okay fine and then halfway through the service I noticed he

still has glasses on top of his head we're like dude he goes it's too late at this point for me my dad went to my cousin's wedding and he wore a hat and he was in the front row because he had a reed. What was his hat? It was just a camel packer hat. He wore it because mom said the other one he was going to put on was dirty. And you can't see the camo. I was like what are we doing here? My buddy went to the wedding last weekend. He said there was a guy who showed up I don't know if he was wearing a hat, but it seems like hat behavior at a wedding where They weren't sure if he was gonna come he showed up and then basically during one of the best man's speeches

Speeches are like the wife speech. He turned around to the wife's aunt and was like why don't you shut the fuck up bitch. Love it. Well they had to kick him out. Kicked out during the ceremony is pretty funny. Like not the reception. Not any of that. Just. Yeah. Yeah. That's tough. I got to write speeches for wedding two weeks now. I might be in prison, who knows? You won't be in prison. Well, I do have something that's gonna cheer you up. Really? Yeah.

So last week. I think I did well this week. The only thing that pisses me off is I'm gonna lose to Judd this week because my team decided to get Tourette's and not play. All right, your team wasn't that good to begin with. Let's not do that. Let's not do that.

Up until Dallas lost by 4,000 points, I was projected to beat you handsomely yeah projections don't actually I know they don't I was projected to not do as bad as your team and anyways anyways we're gonna I'm gonna go Jack this week for the predictions last place seven and six last place damn Damn, I'm a football guy Judd Second last place eight and five I think I did well this cuz he did something that I've never seen before I think I only got one wrong and it was a Thursday night game. Yeah, he went 12 and one

Remember when he said you're not gonna go for it, for to know you're right, but that was pretty damn good So like I started like yeah, you ain't got that one wrong Well cuz get that one right cuz get that one right cuz got that one right cuz got that one right that one right no fucking way I was thinking the same thing last night. I was like Cuz I vaguely remember my picks each time and I'm like all right I think I'm doing okay and I remember thinking to myself I think this Thursday game might screw me 12 and 1 I thought you did it guess who's still in last place though 12 and 1 is a crazy swing. So good for you, man. Good job.

Watching me go 1 and 12 this week. Hey, you got to ride the hot hands. I didn't think, though, that you would be. I thought I was like, all right, our picks were pretty similar. I didn't think I was that off with everyone. That's the thing. Because if you got them right, we all got them right. The Green Bay game, the E.B. game.

What'd you go? 8 Bay game. Yeah. The game, you know, what'd you go? Uh eight and five. Cool. So, where did I beat you guys? The the one that we were different on was the same. I picked San Fran for tonight. Um and then you beat me the Baltimore game.

We both pick Washington and stuff. So, I picked Jacksonville dumbly. Yeah. The whole four guys Yeah, I gotta stop Gotta stop doing that as soon as I go for the fun picks. I stopped being so fun all the time. Yeah Although there were some good games and there were some absolute just shit games this week. The Ravens Washington game was good That was a good game. The Packer game was great for us. I enjoyed it I will be the first to admit I was hesitant on how we'd play. And we played pretty damn well in the first half.

Oh yeah, we did fine. And then the Lions Cowboys game was disgusting. Lions looked so good. I was disappointed in the Bengals game to a point. I think it shows that the Giants are a little tougher than we think. They're frisky. But I was also... They were 1-4. I'm also proud of the Bengals D and only letting up what? 7 or 10 points?

Well the Giants offense sucks. Is not great. But... And they've also... They're starting running back out and they had their starting... They've also played some other shitty offenses and still let up 30 some points. Yeah But the Bengals lost I mean some close games lost real close to the cheese and stuff stuff But funny thing so I went to the packer game Yesterday and they do the fan cam so you can look at yourself

during during the game and You can find yourself online Where your seats are and there's just literally a picture of three dudes and we're all just looking at our buddy's phone and his fantasy football team. Wall out of football. Wall out of football game. And it's just all three of us is like looking at his phone

and we're definitely just like looking if Marc Andrews scored. Yeah, he finally scored. That was the fantasy. Being in two leagues, it's a double-edged sword for me because I was kicking ass in the first one or in my college league. And then I just like, I was like, all right, I got this one in the bag. Then I was just getting upset that I was losing to you.

It's like, Michael, you already won one. I'm like, yeah, but this one's pissing me off. Yep I was hoping it would come down to this. Yes I know. Yeah. Oh so you can watch it. So you just watch him just slowly decline. Yeah. I mean that already one. Yeah I'm sorry. All right. Let's get these picks over with. All right. Twelve and one over here. So I said last week and I did well.

these picks over with all right 12 and 1 over here that's what I said last week and I did well all right first game is a stinker for probably a couple people Denver at New Orleans ooh New Orleans got smacked but they also had I'm gonna say New Orleans I was also gonna take New Orleans. I'll take Denver. New England at Jacksonville. Another stinker. Yeah, I think this is a tough one. That's a London game. Because New England with the rookie quarterback

was still able to put 21. And then who did Jacksonville play last week? The... Bears. Bears. Bears? Bears. And what was the score to that wonder 35 16 35 16 um I'm gonna say New England. I'm gonna say dragonsville just cuz I think they're already there. They're already there So I will do there for two there two games in a row. Oh

Yeah, and because if they don't I Why are they two games and that's tough throw in London really they're like the team. That's like their second home team Okay, all right, so I'm hoping they get one here not hoping but just so that I get the points Seattle at Atlanta Seattle I'm gonna say Atlanta. I'm gonna go Atlanta as well Tennessee at Buffalo Buffalo Buffalo Cincinnati at Cleveland Cincinnati Cincinnati Cincinnati Houston at Green Bay Green Bay Green Bay Green Bay

Miami at I was just like, you gotta say it. You gotta say it. Miami at Indianapolis. Indianapolis. Green Bay has a very tough next four game stretch. It's like Houston, Chicago. Yeah. Detroit.

Detroit. And then, who's yellow? I'm going to go Miami. They play the 49ers right before Thanksgiving. 49ers. What'd you say? I'm going to go Miami. OK.

Just because we need some different picks. Yeah, it's a smart choice. Off What'd you say? I'm gonna go Miami. Okay, just cuz We need some different picks Off the bye week still no to a yeah off the bye week, but also they're Joe Flacco's not playing anymore Really? They're bringing in the hair. This AR will be in if he does not Regress anymore with his recovery. I think they were just saying that to make sure that he still feels like he's the starter Okay, Joe Flacco is definitely probably who should be playing. Yeah, Detroit at Minnesota That's a big game for the north Yeah, I I want Detroit to win this one I'm gonna say Detroit wins us. I'm gonna go Minnesota

Philly at the Giants Philly actually no I want the Giants to win. I would love the Giants to win. I love the Giants to win. Frisky over here. I think the Jellies gonna win AJ Brown back and Devontae Smith back with a week under their belt. It was tough against Cleveland but I think they bounce back. I'm gonna do Philly as well. Las Vegas at the Rams. Rams. Two shitty teams. Yeah. I don't. Vegas didn't win this week. Right. No. Yeah. I don't think they're going to win until they either trade

Devante or the stadium blows up. I'm going to go with the Rams as well. I'll go Rams. Carolina at Washington, yeah wash Washington Kansas City at San Fran San Fran I Think San Francisco will give them the first loss I'm gonna go Chiefs I'm gonna go San Francisco Jets at Pittsburgh Oh Honestly, it really depends on how they look today. Yeah, well we won't know um I

Don't know I don't really think I'm gonna go Jets. I'm gonna go Jets as well. I will take Steelers just to pick a different all right There's two money night games, but for fun Baltimore Tampa Bay Baltimore Tampa Bay Baltimore LA Chargers at Arizona Arizona I'm going Arizona all right That's not bad all right

Cruisin Cruisin all right cruising. I kind of sucks at my story. I don't think should be on the internet. It definitely shouldn't yeah Yeah, you should probably keep that part out. Yeah, well I technically I'm not getting yet, but they don't say yeah Well, they can find I'm off-grid I'm off from this basement No, that's why we don't have anything behind you're not off the grid I'm I am in America. I got jeans on and everything. I'm off-grid. I think you're off-grid. I think that's what it is You're a gritty boy

We're Wisconsin You're no longer shaved not you're no longer eating grits. I don't ever had grits I don't think anyone seems what are great good there basically just basically salty oatmeal It looks like crunchy mashed potatoes Yeah, but like also soft like almost moldy mashed potatoes. Yeah like curdled mash. Yeah, it's more soupy mashed potatoes like in between like what's there to like yeah, I feel like if risotto and mashed potatoes

Had a baby that's grit Yeah, I would agree with you, but it's kind of weird that you know that not having ever had them before I know what they look like, but I've never had it felt them No, and if I did want to feel them. I don't know if I'd go for a firmly grasp Run let it run through your fingers. Hey, you This is your cup of the grips. Run. Run through your fingers. You know that normal saying cut the grips. Yes classic saying cut the grips. It feels pretty good. Ritz in the in the hands. You guys want to play the game. Yeah we can play a game. Is it a good game. It's a fun one I think because it's not really in our game. It's more of an opinion

This I'm good at. Yeah, so it's gonna be Don't do that because it's probably gonna be got I unplugged it This game is called Jack Cusky or Judd. Oh boy Oh, give you a bunch of scenarios and then we're gonna have to see who we think did it or just are these real life things. You have it right now. Fuck Mary kill. You have real answers though. OK. Fuck Mary kill. Jack Cusky you tried the right answers. I got the answer. We're marrying Jack handy established dog house. We're killing Judd. He's old. He's on his way there. Fuck me. I look like a good time

I think yeah, I think I would fuck cuz key for sure. He's probably got the least hairy ass. Yeah, but I can't marry myself And you know said he you're you're taking it You're just like yeah good boy, I Understand my role All right, that's's we all choose our own then you choose your own adventure man You can choose whatever you want, so I'm fucking myself I marry you and you're dead. I think you die in every scenario You think I kill I expect some of the oldest nearly oldest. You're basically there. I'll do that

I mean, I'll just do his so we don't have That'd be like if there is an old man and a baby hanging off a cliff. You're going to pick one with life in front of them. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. What are you saying? Wait, wait, wait, wait. I'm going to finish your thought.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. It's fine. OK, OK. Oh. But that was, I don't know. That was retro. I don't know what that should be. That one was retro, Jack. I don't know. That was retro. I don't know what that should have been. That one was retro, Jack.

Bring him back. Give me three sims of a Sam Adams Oktoberfest. White Claw gets me the Octo. I love Oktoberfest. I think I only drank Sam Adams when Rich and I went to Boston two years ago. I was like, it just feels like the drink of the people. Yeah, yeah.

Drink of the people. You want to drink what they're drinking. Exactly. Also, don't think they were drinking it. I think they just have to have it in every bottle. They just have it there, yeah. Yeah. All right.

We're stranded on a desert island. We're still killing Judd. All right. Who's the leader, who organizes everything, and who dies first? I think I'm pretty organized, but I also feel like I'd die first. I agree. I think Judd and I lead just from a hunting background.

Yeah, we're just gonna let you guys do it. And you die first. I think I would die for sure. I think we use your stature and your size to build things and as you slowly Disintegrate disintegrate with her away. We use you as bait for animals I also saw I also sunburn real real bad Yeah, you're gonna be a point where I'm gonna you guys are gonna have to leave me behind You might ask to go after the sunburn

I can't build a I can't build a shelter. The roof would be too small for you guys. If you just get me working on the shelter early on, and I'm focused on that, and you guys do your thing, eventually the sun will beat me down. I need a lot of food to sustain myself. Yeah. All right?

Island water doesn't agree with me. I have a lot of, I probably have the poops. You're dead. Yeah, you're dead first Okay, whether it's by choice or by nature. Yeah, it's that's her That's pretty he's also got the most meat so if we have to eat anyone in the room Yeah, and then if it boils down to me or Judd and it comes down to a battle royale Who do you think surviving? Well, I did see you hit a couple of fingers off them Yeah, and you do pitch pretty good in Wiffle Ball.

But honestly, I think this is another challenge series. Mud wrestling. Hunger Games. So we have the race and then Hunger Games. You think you're getting close enough to me to be in a battle to grab me? Yeah. He's kind of scrappy.

But you're probably scrappy too. You seem scrappy. I'm staying away. You like twist and pull and pinch for sure. But I'd love to watch you run in the sand Is that a sexual thing I want to see you frolic. He doesn't run insane in baseball though. Yeah No, that's grit. It is grit

Honestly, I think I honestly I think organizationally if we just have to choose lead organize you do do a lot of organization for those golf outings mm-hmm so I'm just gonna give you organization but you also I guess you are also the number one contact for golf outings actually you know what you leave this podcast with your games yeah he organizes pretty well lead organize die first if there is a battle on the beach you know your way around a knife you touch knives more frequently so i'm gonna give it to him just because he has a knife

right there all right cuz he survives the beach beach if we're superheroes What power do each of our head each of us have they have to be different? None of us are flying None of us are flying. Oh, I don't know for some reason I see Jack with like x-ray vision or like The laser shooting out of his eyes laser shooting of eyes would be way cooler than x-ray vision or like the laser shooting out of his eyes? Laser shooting out of eyes would be way cooler than x-ray vision, but x-ray vision would be like, for the sake of battle,

laser vision would be sweet. But x-ray vision, let's say I didn't have to be a superhero and I just wanted to be a dude. Yeah. That would be pretty sweet. We were all thinking it. I think I'd want telekinesis I always like the people just to be able to you can't tell me at one point in your life

You tried to be like Their emotes all the way over there Move it it just doesn't work. Okay, that'd be really cool telekinesis be cool super strength is boring. I'll take lasers Judd I feel like you're I feel like you'd be either super fast or... Or... No, he's the Rock Man from Fantastic Four. No. No. Think about it. Like if we're in the Fantastic Four though, he can be, I'd be Mr. Genius, because I want to be the smart guy.

Yep. He can be Elastigirl, and then you could be either flame. You should be flame on We could do that. We could do that. Would you be? I mean being invisible be kind of cold. Yeah. No invisibility fits. That'd be cool You would be good with invisibility, but I'm also thinking I'm thinking like even just I think you'd be really funny running around fasting goggles yeah and you'd have like some smartass here is like catch you later and then you'd get out of there permanently slick back you'd look really good that way

So speed speeder invisibility is all you all right, that's fair All right. Well a zombie apocalypse. What's the order that we die? It's a lot of Yes, these two You know your way with a baseball bat Pretty well. I do have a Captain America shield and a lot of knives around here though. But you have glass ankles. Yeah, but I'll wear my ankle braces non-stop. Okay, okay. And it's not in the apocalypse, they ain't coming off.

Those are stand- You guys are bigger figures, they're gonna notice you first. I can sneak away. We could push you out into the middle of the street. But they still wouldn't see me, I'm like this. Yeah like yeah, they're gonna tell as soon as you get in your car Yes, who they're everywhere, but zombies zombies are just recruiting for their team They don't want someone's yeah, you're the fast little guys that come out of nowhere, and you have to shoot him really fast They kill that little kid in that

The walking dead yeah, I've never seen the Walking Dead. Well, that has ruined a big part of it. Well, it was little. Little part. Yeah, I don't know. You guys first. I don't know. I think whoever gets angry first.

I think through resources alone, I will survive. What resources? I'll just go to my farm. That is true. I'll go to my grandpa's farm. I don't have resources then. You're dead first. I would die. Okay.

Who do you like more? What does that have to do with anything? Because then if you come to my farm and we could team up, he'll probably die first because he doesn't have the reinforcements. Tell me about your guys' farms. Okay.

What do you guys got in your farms? I don't know where that farm is Tell me about your guys' farms. OK. What do you guys got in your farms? I don't know where that farm is, but ours is way less people. So there could be a lot less zombies. What do you got up there? Do you got like chickens and stuff? Oh, we got pigs. Ooh.

What do you got? We got pigs. We got cows. Do you got livestock? No. You just got land? There's nothing they can feed on. Do you have any sort of crops?

Do you have crops? Corn. I got corn. Plenty of guns. Tractors. Vehicles. Also, you don't want to eat that corn. Why not? Because that type of corn isn't actually edible unless it's

sweet corn. He doesn't know what kind of corn I have. So he's talking about it. Of course I do. OK, he's talking on his ass right now. Do both of you have livestock? No, but I have I have a lake so there's a good barrier zombies can't swim Zombies can't swim that is true. So we need a barrier on one side

But we we could sit in the middle of the lake how many trees you got so many I have a whole campground sit in the middle of the lake how many trees you got so many I have a whole campground over under 10 guns go over yeah over over under 10 people under way under if we go there it'd be us too there's no one there oh my grandpa grandpa's gonna be there no grandpa's in a condo right now All right, honestly, I'm gonna go up with I'm gonna go up with you up I'll invite you He doesn't Alright Zombie apocalypse. All right. Zombie apocalypse. All right, here we go.

Next one. Who is the cleanest? Who is the messiest? I'm pretty messy. Judd's the cleanest for sure. You've got to be the cleanest. This room hasn't gotten any cleaner. Yeah.

This is definitely the dirtiest. I go in spurts. You're probably the dirtiest. You're definitely the cleanest. OK. That's fair. I was probably going to say that, yeah cleanest. Okay. That's fair. I was probably gonna say that yeah. Yeah I'm a dirty boy. I like specific parts of my dwelling clean. I'm a right if my room's a little dirty

It's my room. It doesn't bother me as much But I'll get to a point like this gotta be clean clean kitchen to must clean living rooms nice But I feel like you're top to bottom Bleach your asshole kind of clean Mine's got grit no, this is pretty more but I'm not I think someone has died which one of us is gonna figure out the murder Judd I think you're the most nosy. I give that to you. Yeah, I think you're the most nosy. Like I would want to figure it out. Yeah, you would. I would be the only one like a lot of you would be like, I don't give a shit. I would happen.

No. Yeah. Yeah. You would be the one looking into it. Yeah. I'd take a week off of the podcast. Probably move the stuff out of Jack's house when he died but oh we're on the case I thought one of us died no no no oh we're on the case judge again still you but it does make it does seem like a way more it's you who figures it out but Jack and I take the role way too seriously like we are playing it up like it's a TV show like Jack and Michael on the scene Just like we have fucking work to do. Yeah, I'm like I'm like actually like You're on a computer setting forensic reports. We go to the store with

I'm on your shoulders trench coat Have you seen this man. I drew it. No. Then I bring up my picture I drew out of the middle of your stomach. What about this. You're like have you watched Batman. Maybe someone killed him in an alley. Judges it all figured out we're still in the middle of the show. I'd watch it. It's 30 minutes of, I've already figured out the murder in the first 10 minutes, and you guys, me not telling you that I have. It could be like a two and a half man reboot. All right.

All right, we're gonna start a band. Who's lead singing, who's playing the drums, and who's just a backup dancer? I don't have a good voice. None of us do If I always said if I did have a good voice I'm like feel so sorry for most people well everyone that I don't have a good voice because I'd be really fucking sweet in concert So I will take backup dancer because I'm pretty sure that's just a singer that never could make it

Go for it there Backup dancer, I always said like it there are five jobs I wanted in my life that I like, if I could pick anything, I'd wanna be like a country music singer. It just looks like so much fun. Yeah. So much fun. Does that translate into me being lead singer energy?

I don't know. I think I could be a little cocky about it, sure. I could see you honestly giving you the drums though I feel like you would love to be shirtless playing the drums that would be fun too but again I might say this I don't know if any of us are gonna be lead singers Judd you look like you would love to bust out the triangle and just bang that once or twice I'm piano bang the track I think I have a few squares and piano that'd be my instrument okay well that wasn't what it was drums backup singer Piano who's singing who's playing the drums? I'm gonna take piano

You bring me out never saw shit if we were getting murders Do you read the setlist there's no piano in any of them. So what are the three instruments? Lead singer, drummer, backup dancer. I don't know. Do you want to be singer or dancer? I'll sing. I can do this. I think it's more about showmanship. You know? No. But I'll dance. I'll steal the show. I just said I would. Oh no I will play drums. I'll draw them. I'll draw. How about we take turns. We could do that. We come out in the trench coat and then we just decide. Well I could also see because he being those people who do the sign language on the side but they're

also like just getting really good when do a single sign. Maybe on accident once. You're doing some crazy stuff. Hey, ooh, Josh Allen. All right, we're on a cooking show. All right. Who burns their dish? Who wins? I win. Krusty does like to cook a lot.

I would never burn anything. Are you a good cook? I'm a good cook. Want to rock, paper, scissors for who burns it? What is your favorite thing to cook? Yeah. Ooh, that's a good I really like I'd make a very good honey glaze salmon with some couscous and asparagus or I'll burn something

Honey, lace salmon couscous. He's got sugar easy to burn under pressure. I think he choke I think he burns the sugar on the salmon. That's good. I think I think he burns the salmon I think you give me something respectable, but boring. Yeah, I think yeah. Yeah. What did you cook? Oh, it probably something like Just realistically probably something's like just what I would think would be an easy thing for me to do I'd probably do like some I'd make some fancy like maybe meat like meatballs like a buffalo chicken meatball, and I'd make some sort of buffalo chicken pasta I like buffalo chicken shit I try to put a new thing so if it's a game day theme

In Buffalo or I was thinking like um You know like Iron Chef how you get like one ingredient yeah Chef how you get like one ingredient yeah, I can make a lot of these a cereal Like cereal crusted chicken okay with cereal crust like cornflakes crust a chicken You know what's the one crutch really? I'm crunch berry mozzarella sticks, okay? What's the one when they get a that burned all of them though, so I guess I'll get a bunch of different ingredients Yeah I would like to do that with us.'ll be fun we should do our own we should I think that'd be fun to do we'll do that we'll just say I burned it because when I did do the serious thing one I definitely

did burn everything yeah okay I tried to deep-fried it and have the right oil uh who's playing us in a movie of the podcast Peter Dinkinklage. No I do. We went to get off and ask us. Yeah it's that gal for that. I'll take that. No I was gonna say Zach. For you. Okay. I'll give you that. He's a short guy. He's good looking. He's a big John. I was gonna give you I was gonna give you Henry Cavill. I'll take that. But he's but so I'm just like a square. Can I change mine? Okay, he is a nerd though. He is he is a nerd Henry Cavill. That's perfect for you. He likes Warhammer It could be like Dylan O'Brien

That's Teen Wolf Maze Runner. I was gonna give one of the Franco's to you either. Oh, I'll do Franco's like I'm getting nothing But attractive men. I'm alright with that with that Dave Franco like fits like your personality too All right, yeah, a little bit of an asshole. I like that too. I like it East Coast you feel kind of East Coast in my Jeans and browns. Yeah, but I feel like the vibe I get from you so I'm just yeah You coordinated the jeans in the brown sweatshirt though. Yeah, so it's cuz you wanted me to go to this This was on my floor. I went, ooh.

We'll talk about it. I mean, how many more you got? No, I got a bunch. What would it be? Sweet. I like this. Who would play Judd? Who would play Judd?

Someone Jewish. All of them. Sandler? Adam Sandler? Adam Sandler wouldn't be bad. Neither would Kevin James. No, no. Ready?

Andy Samberg. Andy Samberg. Andy Samberg. I'll give you Andy Samberg with a beard. I'll give you that for sure. Whatever this is, this is, yeah. Okay. Jake Jono would have been a good one. He kind of looks like me. I don't know. He does comedies. Be nice if you would offer me a bottle opener. I have a goofy themed bottle opener Open it with your teeth already yeah No, so I was in these are on my floor you guys ever been to Chris Evans I'll give you Chris Evans when he has a beard, too I don't

Paul run Paul no Paul run He could be His sweater and knives out. Paul Rudd. Paul, no, Paul Rudd. Paul Judd. He could be Paul Rudd. Paul Rudd, yeah, Paul Rudd. Paul Judd. Other racially ambiguous. You guys ever been to Hippie Toms? Oh, so, I don't know what the hell that is, but.

Okay, we'll just brush over my idea. Well, Hippie Toms, go ahead. It is worth it. No, we're done, go on. Well, I just had a thought coming up. Yeah, go for it, you'll lose it. I'll tell you after the podcast. Okay. This is great Kind of blow your mind, okay fine, but I'll bring up hippie times later, too Okay, no, no no gives a shit about hippie times, okay hippie tip

All right, nothing feels better than like a nosebleed that actually gets the job done Rather than blowing the nose and then you feel weirdly more congested afterwards That's what I've been hitting on. I've gotten some just my neck my nose has been nasty It's been so dry I've been getting nosebleeds left and right and I've been using that mouth tape and last night. I almost died It was really like so stuck and I was like trying to breathe And I was trying to be so quiet because Jen was sleeping and also I just went I couldn't breathe I started panicking I ripped it off and Are you all right? I was like no. I just couldn't breathe. I tried to blow my nose nothing came out that sucks

But we survived and I don't think I'm gonna do mouth tap again tonight, but I did get a good chunk out of there I'll show you similar to that last night. I woke up to vomiting noises and My cat was throwing up on the comforter. I was sleeping under so that was fun But then I was like, you know, like somehow I don't you guys don't have cats But sometimes cats kind of dry heave a little bit or just like a little comes out and it was at the end of my bed And I was like you know what not worth ditching the whole comforter right now. This isn't affecting me I looked I'm like I don't really see much. I was good woke up this morning. I have a blanket to the right on my bed Everywhere vomit everywhere. I'm like I got checked to see if this cat's alive

We were good All right, you guys want to keep going absolutely. I like this this I like opinions all right Who's most likely to fall for a pyramid scheme? Well probably me I would I was gonna say you cusky I Really don't think any of us. I don't think so either but if we had to pick one I'll take it Yeah, I love a deal. I feel like someone in your fraternity Yeah, I would do it as a favor to Mary Kay Empire

Man I got this job be really nice if you helped me out You're like what the fuck is happening you offered me a trip to Cancun if I paint 45 houses in a day All right, who's most likely to forget their wallet when they go out Not I because mine's attached to my phone so I never forget it anywhere Probably me again Have you are you when's the last time you left your car at a bar? There was a time chronically I was leaving it at one point. I I Forgetting my wall to go out tough forgetting my card at the bar very prominent mainly because usually when I want to leave It's still decently but like I've been there for four hours, I'm ready to go, and I have this rule where if I'm opening a tab at a bar,

and first question, do you keep the card? And if they say no, I go, I already like this place. Because then I'm not gonna lose my card. But if they keep it, I quickly switch my cards, and I go, here, take the one I don't care about losing. Yeah. Because, there are times I've been like, you know what, fuck it.

It stems from college, where I worked at the bar I was usually at, and I'm like, I'll just get it in the morning. Right. They can close me out, they know to tip X amount. And so, yeah, there was a point, it's how I got my job, actually, is I lost my card three times in the same month.

Literally every weekend I lost it. And shout out to Chase Bank for getting you a replacement real quick, that's an ad for ya. Thank you Chase. But they lost it three times, the third time I went to change it, the owner of the gym I now work at goes, hey do you want to work here. And I go what he goes you could run the place also be the head trainer. I was like sure. And that's how I got that job. Wow. I had

something to say about that. I think I think man like the job you have now that's why you got it. Yeah. I think the bouncy job. I thought you're leaving your card so much at the bar that they're like you can just stay here and work until you find it No job I have no all right, I I think I know the answer to this but who would randomly buy a giraffe Yes I was also thinking Cusky. Yeah, I am too. Here's the thing. We have filter systems for our purchases, I think.

I don't think B-purchases or filters your purchases as much as we might. You'd have the idea first. Then I'd probably get it a little slower. But let's be honest. Both the ladies are going to be like, yeah. Probably not. first then I'd probably get it a little slower but let's be honest both the the ladies are gonna be like yeah probably not yeah honestly if if she was gone for a long weekend she might come home to something yeah that's true that one time

in high school I just came home with four turtles yeah you're telling us that then you raised some they died that well only one of them died because he escaped No, he's by the Christmas wrapping paper I Do know if I left Rachel alone like if I told her hey, I'm I'm ready to like I get a pet all that stuff if I left her alone long enough There'd be 14 dogs. Yeah, apartment just for sure one dog like you said you're ready get a pet and all that stuff. If I left her alone long enough, there'd be 14 dogs at the apartment, for sure. One dog. Like you said you were ready for a pet. I go, there was no S at the end of that.

Yeah, one good pet. Yeah, that's fair. OK. We win the lottery. Who goes bankrupt first? I guess the guy that buys the draft, right? Yeah. I actually don't think any of us. I actually think we'd be pretty good.

We have to choose someone. I'll take that one. Yeah, because I would be the guy that buy. Aaron, please run that in. Oh, is that Wilson? Yeah. Well, I would have lost anyways. Oh, he said no.

No, I don't think you got his all this is good good for Let's call it Jack. Let's call Jack. Well, I think that Who would just as the you would have if you had unlimited money? You might have some like in like just purchases that don't make sense. I would have gotten a crazy cool one. I was looking at I would have gotten a crazy cool one. I was looking at This one was pretty cool to begin with I got off basic market was 25 bucks But the only reason why I went to Facebook market is cuz yeah, but it's pretty intense honestly It's intense and the only reason I got this one is cuz I wanted a really fucking cool one. Oh actually yeah, that's 100% touchdown

Is because the one that I really wanted was $250 like I can't I can't no You're gonna lose your money first. I had unlimited money. I have so many cool gadgets Buy that but that immediately life-size life's actually there's a there's a life-size Darth Vader At Home Depot right now and the lightsabers a candy cane low low price of two ninety nine ninety nine I've been trying to convince the missus to let us get it as a Christmas decoration but I don't think she's gonna she's not gonna she's not gonna go for it. So the last question I got is rank your favorite podcast guests that we've had on fat chance.

Oh I actually don't think it'll be that hard. We've only had one. We've had some we've had some guys do we have to. Here's the question. I've had a lot more. I guess. Yeah I've had so many more guests than you guys had. But should we narrow this down to the guests we've kind of had since we've been doing. No we can go. We can just go our top five. I'm gonna look at all the guests we've had. OK. I've had some like crazy fun moments. It's like before you guys were here like some good stories. I mean the hardest one of the hardest I'd'd laugh is the hamster bit I did. So my buddy Sam will always be in the top.

I mean, to this day, he's still like the number one episode that's ever been put out by this. I mean, he's getting rivaled now, but there's a story. My friend Scott told me that he was out for a walk at seven o'clock in the morning and there were high schoolers egging him as he was like coming back from his walk in coffee, which was crazy. First of all, I know Scott. Yeah, the guy who broke his leg at the golf outing.

Yeah, same guy who swung and missed. the golf outing. Yeah Same guy who's swung and missed exactly. He was late getting taken a shot. Scott's a hoot and a half Top guests I mean the remote Rushmore of guests that we've had on this show since I mean we've had Carmen we've had Alec Flynn. We've had the choosy we have Carmen we've had Alec Flynn. We've had the choosy we have Eric's he's definitely number one. We have choosy was wild the fact that this man Flew out out of nowhere to come see us. Yeah, and then we took him to a roast battle And he was like this is the time of my life and then I took him out to drinks afterwards. Yeah at Paul's, and, or the Tiki Bar, sorry, took him to Tiki Bar,

and then there's this group of girls that came up, and he's like, he has a podcast, they love his feet. I go, you're gonna scare everyone away. I go, I'm not even trying to keep them here, but let's not think they're gonna we're gonna murder them. Yeah, it's not scare them. Yeah, the the choose a guy was a lot of fun. Carmen was funny. Josh is always good. Josh is always a guy. She's always good when he's on. Yeah, I have a good time with AJ. Yeah, he's good.

And honestly, Eric for the interview at a bar was great. Yeah, that was funny too because it was just like totally him Just been like I'm hanging out with my white friends Brandon's interview at a bar. I thought was great too that drink was so bad, but I liked it What that's like the one episode we have not been able to put out because we got fired from... Oh, that's right, we haven't put that on. No, I can't. I don't feel good putting that out.

Yeah, yeah. I mean, I would in terms of like, it was fun, but... Yeah, I agree with what you're saying though. Yeah. So, did we come to a conclusion? Who's yours? Pretty much everyone you though. Yeah. So, did we come to a conclusion? Who's yours? I, pretty much everyone you said, Yeah. Yeah, pretty much is up there.

We're being too nice. Zach Bryan's dad. Zach Bryan's dad, yeah. Oh, okay. Uh, Uh, that whole day was a shit show. Yeah.

That could have gone so much better. So much better so much better Yeah, just a little bit yeah, I couldn't make it so that was already like one sir like alright cameras don't work cameras not on And then we like try to interview people doesn't go very well The st. Pat's one was fun the mic stick Swim Pat one was fun. The Mike's day. St. Pat one was fun. It would be nice in hindsight if we were just communicated with as to what to expect.

Yeah. Would have been great. Yeah. Yeah, I think a lot of gold came from it. But at the same point, it was just a mess of gold. Like, it was like. I think it was a second form of legitimacy to this where it feels like this could actually

Not be like by no means is this gonna be the biggest thing in the world or anything? But like hey something could come of it that it could be Successful in its own way and funny and so it did give some legitimate to us. I think some people then It's it's like an IMDB credit for us now. Yeah, it's also like we wrote a lot of punches and we're just like We as a people can handle that we know what to expect now and things like that Yeah, we learned lessons through it. We got pretty freaking shit can't We did it basically was we were getting paid to drink their booze, which is nice. We do we but we just drink booze

Yeah, allegedly Have you touched one of those since I don't know if you ever will I never will I view it as like We talked about like KFC Never will I view it as like I we talked about like KFC Like I'll drive by it, and I'm like I don't know if I will ever have a craving for that ever again in my life I don't think I'll ever get it ever again a month, and I'm alright with that Yeah, I'm right with that, but do you hate KFC? I've been different about it. I don't want it though. I think I understand its purpose. I cannot hate on its purpose but the product it is selling is not good for America. KFC. Yeah yeah yeah. I know what you're saying. I mean it's unhealthy. It's unhealthy and

the fact that they operate that way, that they're actively feeding poison. Now what I would say about not KFC is slightly different, but you kind of get the analogy I'm making. Yeah, I understand. I understand as a business. What they're doing. What they're doing, and you know what? No hard feelings, but also up yours.

So. Uh. Ha ha ha ha ha. Ha ha ha ha ha. Ha ha ha ha ha. So suck it. That was good. I like I like the opinions I feel that was going it was good. I like the opinions a lot. I like that. I can bring the shield. Yeah. Yeah. It was real late in the episode, but it was a good play Trying to think of any other good questions that would uh Good opinions there's a lot about death like who's gonna die first Also a lot that I saw that I was like

Obviously like opinion questions trying to look them up and try to to figure out which ones would be good for the pot. A lot of them, we already knew the answer. Yeah, all right. Who are you voting for and why? Rolf Nader. I'm not registered. Rolf Nader was an independent. You're not registered?

I'm not registered. My grandmum stopped me this weekend when I was home. And they're like, Jack, please. Oh. They're like, Jack, please tell me you Jack, please tell me you registered to vote. I'm not registered, but I will be. You can register at the polls. It's easy.

I know. Bring your ID, whatever it is, ID. Bring that. Bring a piece of mail that says that you live here in this region. And that's it. There you go. You're enough to vote. Yeah. So what are we

voting for. President of the United States. Oh. Are you voting for. I didn't know where I thought we were voting whether or not KFC stays restaurant. It's not a restaurant. It's an establishment. Yeah. Is it. Also heard the Krabby Patty from Wendy's wasn't that good. I know. Also. OK. OK. I watched a review on it. I watched a gentleman eat it. And he goes, it's literally just a cheeseburger with essentially a tangier Big Mac sauce. However, he did say the pineapple frosty, delicious.

You got a chef's kiss for that. But let's be honest. What was so special about the Krabby Patty to begin with is definitely Yeah, and you can't forget the pickles No, you can forget the pickles Big pickle guy bacon bacon spirits here. Do you think that plankton owns Wendy's? No, cuz it'd be like a hologram burger The chum bucket

The chum buckets more making his own burger Calling this is the crabby, buddy You know it'd be really funny is if Taco Bell rode the waves of this crabby patty thing and then turned theirs into the chum bucket Yes, I love that a chum bucket taco would be so good. Here's the thing though It actually surprises me no one tried to do this crabby patty thing sooner Yes. I love that. A chum bucket taco would be so good. Here's the thing, though. It actually surprises me no one tried to do this Krabby Patty thing sooner. Yeah.

I'm sure it was hard to get it to. The licensing has to be. It has to be a licensing issue. But like, that they haven't tried, and that SpongeBob, whoever Nickelodeon, didn't have an agreement with someone like, get your Krabby Patty here. I think if you go to Nickelodeon Studio, or like agreement with something like get your Krabby Patty here. I think if you go to Nickelodeon Studio or like something Orlando or whatever I think

you can get a Krabby Patty. Can we agree though the best Krabby Patty you can get outside of actually being in the cartoon and getting it is the mini gummy one. The gummy is the only one. That's the only good Krabby Patty right now. Yeah. Yeah. That's right.

I would agree that's the only good Krabby Patty right now. And we've had this conversation. It is top three cartoon foods I want, is the Krabby Patty with the Jellyfish Jelly. What? OK, so Krabby Patty, Jellyfish Jelly. What's another cartoon food? Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle Pizza, Ed and Eddie, like 10-decker sandwich.

That looks phenomenal. The Jawbreakers from. Edd n Eddy. Edd n Eddy. There's. There's plenty of other ones. Gosh, now I'm hungry. I know, same.

I haven't eaten dinner yet. Shit. How much time did I kill telling you I was getting. 25. 25, damn. No, I'm just kidding, I think it was like 13. It was 13. Yeah. They were probably pretty good. I'm just kidding. I think it was like 13. It was 13. Yeah.

They were probably pretty good. I have no other opinions for you other than we're going to start a GoFundMe for me. And then come to the golf outing. Come to the golf outing. Drink booze better. We're going to be at the Comedy Cabin last May. Yeah.

We are actually going to be at Copper Comedy December 21st. You need to figure out that. Oh, I need to get that on my calendar. Yes you do. It might be my mother's birthday. Hold on. It might be your mother's birthday? My mother's birthday is the 22nd. Okay cool. Then it's not your mother's birthday. This is a Christmas in September situation. No, it's my mother's birthday on the 22nd. Okay, can you bring your mom to the show? She doesn't want to be there. Oh my god, I saw her at the Tiki Bar and she was so in love with the fact that we were doing this.

I think she'd enjoy watching. She was probably buzzing. We were all buzzing. But when you did leave, she did pull me aside and goes, Jack is so happy that he's doing this I was like this is so sweet But why not let your mom come see you she did She talked to Brian Kallen like him and I oh yeah

Yeah, Brian Kallen will not be at this one, but Kevin Hart will be so Nothing was worse than them going. Hey, you got it. a realer in here really and we're we're covered for you we're all your best friends all right on three say here voting for three two Music