F*ck Buddies: A Sex and Dating Advice Podcast - Episode 210 - Exclusive Invite To The Right Stuff

Episode Date: October 10, 2022

Get your favourite liberal lies and insurrection conspiracy theories ready, y'all, it's time to muddy the dating pool!  Topics include revisiting Canada's sex worker laws, the right's hottest new dating app, navigating busy schedules, being seduced into removing a condom, first date with li'l baby Tate, how not to approach older women on Tinder.

I put my trust in you, and then I trust in love. I put my trust in you, I put my trust in love. I put my trust in you, and then I trust in love. I put my trust in you, I put my trust in love. Hello friends, my name is Day Miller. And I'm Niall Spain. We're your fuck buddies. We are an award nominated sex and dating advice show where we take your sticky, sexy situations and turn them into sexy, sticky situations.

Simply put, we find questions either online or from our wonderful listeners, and we answer them right here, right now, on the topic of sex and dating. Now, Day. Eh. We got a lot to talk about. It is quite possibly the earliest we've ever recorded. I don't know. Not that early. I don't know if you can tell, but I've got my morning voice.

We do both have a little morning croak. We've got a little bit of that. And I think it's only an add to the podcast. Yeah, a little bit of that morning DJ. Yeah, welcome to Now and Dane in the morning. We're going to send you driving off to work with some good sex and dating advice questions. Anyway, here are the wallflowers, one headlight. So, first of all, we were number one in Namibia last week.

Obviously. So that's fucking cool. Shout out to Namibia. week. Obviously. So that's fucking cool. Shout out to Namibia. Love you guys. Thank you. Number two, right now, we'll do some sex news if you're amenable to that. Hey man, I literally

woke up ten minutes ago, so I am ready to do whatever. I'm just a malleable piece of clay ready to be shaped and molded for the day perfect well currently uh since last monday which was the third of october uh there is a landmark five-day superior court hearing in uh led by a coalition of sex workers and sex worker led groups in canada hoping to get sex work fully decriminalized,

arguing that the 2014 laws that went into place are, in fact, more harmful, or at least still harmful to them. So that's ongoing right now, which could be a big deal if it goes through. That would be great. Any law against sex work doesn't stop. It's like abortions.

You know what I mean? That's literally what's been happening so they didn't make it illegal to be a sex worker but they made it illegal to you know be a someone who i guess purchases sex work or like engages like a third party which meant that they're dealing with terrified clients who are bringing them to ever more unsafe locations just so that they don't get caught, putting sex workers in more danger, which is one of the many things that they are effectively arguing against. So that's a pretty big deal going on right now. Yeah. Yeah, it's one of those things where the rhetoric for banning abortions quite often is like, oh, you can't ban abortions, you can just ban safe abortions. And sex workers, same thing. They, you know, the people who have any crimes against you because you would therefore be like, you know, admitting to a crime yourself.

So it's it's so ridiculous. That's another part of it is that it doesn't let any like immigrants engage in sex work. They're like exempt from the fact that sex work is not illegal, but it is if you're not a Canadian citizen. So a lot of immigrants engaged in sex work are now unable to come forward if they're a victim of violence or anything else, because then they themselves are in trouble. It's the whole thing. You know, it's pretty fucked. So hopefully this will work out and hopefully we will make good strides forward. Yeah.

Fingers crossed. I got more sex news. There's a new dating app on the scene. Have you heard about this? I know. Okay. So it's called the right stuff. Ooh, this sounds bad.

Now, what would you think it is? I'm assuming it's a it's a conservative right way yeah you fucking nailed it you fucking nailed it it's an invite only invite only conservative uh dating app where you're not allowed pronouns are banned it's safe from pronouns as they say you're also not allowed to be gay on it uh it also shares the name with a neo-nazi blog called the right stuff i mean it's not exactly the most creative uh name but like hey i'm sure i'm sure many failed marriages will be, will be born from this wonderful app. Well,

they might not be because women aren't joining. What? They've, they've offered. So women join, they get premium subscription for free. All they have to do is invite a few friends. Men have to pay for the premium subscription.

I think I heard 95 to 96 percent of its user base for man and they're very upset yeah i mean which you know what kind of surprises me considering how many you know right wing profiles we get on tinders but i that's also very like we're talking about like five or six uh you know in the, in the, in the mix of Tinder, which is, you know, that's a drop in the pond. And that's the thing.

They, they seem prevalent cause they're so fucking bizarre, but like, it's not that many. So I'll just get you with a few, a few things. Um, so another funny thing is they're already in a legal dispute because there's a

third thing called the right stuff. And it's also a dating service. And as they say in their own words uh their dating services for people or the existing dating services for people with higher levels of education and many of them are left-wing so they definitely don't like the confusion so they're suing the right wing already um one of their big funders is a gay republican so he's funding a product he's not able to use the irony there's an openly gay republican uh yeah i could get this person's name yeah wild to me yeah maybe they're not even gay i don't know sorry i took screenshots of a lot of the stuff no i like i don't i don't necessarily need to know this. I would have assumed that this would have come across my desk at some point in time.

Oh, it is now, isn't it? Yeah, I guess. Peter Thiel. Okay, so I guess he's not a politician. He's a billionaire entrepreneur, venture capitalist, and political activist, but he's staunch Republican and gay and backing this thing, even though it will not let him use it. I love the idea of him just being like, God damn it. We just need more Republican babies. So I need to do my part to make absolutely

brilliant matches. Yeah. Um, just the irony of it being a safe space free from pronouns but yeah you know kaylee mckinney or whatever the like trump like press secretary or whatever yes yeah yeah so she's part of it as well she's basically spearheading the movement trying to bring more women on and republican staffers report that many young conservative women instead of taking on her personal outreach have instead jeeringly passed around screenshots of her messages to group chats. Everyone involved the app is very scared that it's vulnerable to trolling, which is why it's invite only. On top of that, I'm sure it comes as no surprise between all the many, many images and promotional images, there's one black person in the back of a collage of male users that's it

everyone else white shocking hey i'm surprised they had that much you know what yeah and now in their own words sorry it's it's probably just uh stock images that they just like they only had a certain amount of budget and that was like the last pitch. And they were like, fuck. Okay, I guess we'll go with this one. That intern got fired that day. Yeah. Uninvited from the right stuff. In their words, it is for conservatives to connect in authentic and meaningful ways. Other dating apps have gone woke.

We bring people together with shared values and similar passions. Jokes such as swipe white and the right stuff have been abound. And I think I'll just leave you with two things. One is that the founder who used to work for Trump founded it because he found this very difficult to date people. I wonder why. But then I would like you to guess, because it's similar to Hinge, where it gives you prompts. Guess two prompts.

I have two prompts here, and I wonder if you can guess what they are. This is very broad, but okay. Well, like, you know. i'm what i'm aiming for oh one is let's go dot dot dot okay close ish the other one is uh i'm trying to think like something like if you were stuck on a desert island you know what what civil right would you take away um you know what i really like your let's go dot dot dot because i can imagine just how impotently angry people would be because we've seen the prompts in general they're never done correctly so it's like let's go dot dot dot to the beach it's like no you idiot uh no we have my favorite let's go dot, dot, dot to the beach. It's like, no, you idiot. No, we have my favorite liberal lie is dot, dot, dot.

Hell yeah. Right. And we also have January 6th was dot, dot, dot. And I'm not joking. Oh, isn't that just good? Isn't that just good? It reads so much like a parody, it's not even funny. I love how they're like, oh no, we're actually very concerned about trolling.

Meanwhile, I'm not convinced that this isn't, in and of itself, a brilliant troll. Maybe Mr. Thiel is like, oh fuck these guys. He's like, yeah, yeah, I'll back you, but you gotta do this. And they're like, oh yeah, these little idiots. Well, this guy's just like, it's so hard for me to date. What I'm going to do is make a dating service where only men go on. So I've

removed them from the dating pool. Oh, right. Now he's the only shitty person on whatever dating app he uses damn let's be fair probably fucking uh e-harmony yeah has he just corralled all the fucking assholes yeah it's like there's such a wealth of funny fucking information about all this that it's just like also isn't the right stuff of like a mel gibson romantic comedy maybe or jack nicholson also maybe this is a comedy it doesn't sound very romantic though i don't know the right stuff is a

is a apparently an astronaut movie yeah okay is it about them well being racist on the moon because that would check out um i mean it was it's made. Yeah, I don't know. Well, yeah, there we go. That's some sex history right there. I think we should feign a Republican account and try to try to get on the set. Yeah. Who's in who's inviting you? I don't. Apparently.

Well, we should just pretend we're a Republican woman and they'll be like, you know, frothing at the mouth to get us on. Yeah. Like, I would love to know their their like vetting process because like i imagine it's very minimal you don't have to do things well yeah just like make a twitter account or something be like i'll join yeah he literally just me in a in a blonde wig i haven't even shaved my beard just that's that's what my profile picture is gonna be i'm pretty sure i have a blonde wig somewhere and then when people like be like hey you're a man be like no pronouns dude hey yeah please what the fuck are you a liberal cook all right ready ready to jump in some questions i just

you know i i've been thinking about this a lot and I see this a lot for some, I get, uh, a lot of my shows like Miss Marvel and She-Hulk, you know, women and women of color, superheroes, and the amount of people who get so angry about them. It's fucking scary. It's so fucking funny that for some reason, the left and people who are more liberal in their politics are the ones who are like branded as snowflakes and branded as, you know,

the, you know, the, the overly sensitive ones, but we're upset about things like, Hey, don't take people's body autonomy away from them. Yeah. And they're upset that a fictional

giant green strong woman did do a twerk with megan the stallion there's also like they were upset that cartoon bunny not as sexy anymore yeah like the the things that people uh get upset about on the right or like you remember when everyone was burning their shoes because of colin kaepernick they were just like i've had enough of you nike there was just like there was a whole viral trend of of right-wing people burning their shoes in their backyard. Yeah. Yeah. I just, I don't know, man. It's funny though, because I think what seems to happen a lot is that

the right tend to claim that other people are doing something and then it almost immediately comes out that that's what they're doing. So I think it's just, it's all like that misdirection. It's like, you snowflakes! And it's like, lullabunny!direction. It's like, you snowflakes. And it's like, lullaby. You're like, okay.

Are you good, bro? You okay? Are you all you safe spaces? Anyway, here's our invite only app. We could not use pronouns and you could not be anything but us. Yeah. It's a joke. Ready?

Yeah. Yeah, I am. I'm going to ease you into the questions with one of our favorite repeat listeners. Oh, man, hold on, hold on. Is it Pinoy Boy Toy? It's Pinoy Boy Toy. Did you see the question? I didn't.

Oh, love it. I just know that whenever we get a question from him, I'm on, like, I need to strap in because it's going to be, can I guess that it's like, I was on a super yacht with 900 absolutely gorgeous women. Am I close? He was on an absolutely gorgeous women on 900 super yachts. You were very close. Damn it. I knew it. I knew it.

I'm going to jump in. Okay. It's Pinoy Boy Toy. Hey, boys. It didn't work out with the last girl who lived two hours away I asked to meet her halfway And she didn't make an effort, so that was it for me Good job

I like that you're setting Sorry it didn't work out, but yes, you're right You're setting boundaries, you're looking after yourself Fuck yeah, I am sorry it didn't work out I ended up pushing through with the supposed foursome But it ended up as a threesome Because the other model pussied out at the last minute Alas, only a threesome I I'm dating someone new though, and she's amazing.

We went out a couple of times already. The problem is our schedule doesn't seem to match. She's quite busy with her career and business, and I have a lot on my plate. We have to reschedule dates at times. She's a strong, independent woman, but I feel like we're not progressing at the pace I want it to be. We only see each other like one or two times a month. As a result, I will go out on dates with other girls, but half the time I end up thinking of her. I feel like she also goes out with other guys, but I haven't really asked. To be honest, at this point in time, I'm getting tired of all these one night stands, a meaningless sex with women I know I won't pursue a relationship with. I really like this girl, but I don't want to seem needy and she obviously has plenty of options. With her being a famous

influencer, I'm quite sure a lot of guys have been trying to shoot their shot what advice do you have for me boys i'm really into her and i don't want to fuck this up how come it's so easy to get girls you're not really attracted to but when it comes to the ones you like i second guess my actions i tend to be more careful with my words fuck help me haha uh i feel this on a lot of levels um first and foremost the the whole you know why is it easy to attract the people you're not interested in to is because our brains are actively working against us at every possible

moment. All the time. And when we aren't trying to attract people, we're more ourselves. We're more natural. We are more confident. There isn't this, as you said, second guessing. There's this insecurity. There's this, you know, you're not like, Oh,

I want to be, I want to look sexy. Cause like you're sexiest when you were, when you're just like in your skin, you know what I mean? Like you're just like existing as who you are. That's when people exude their, their sexy.

It's not when they're like, you know, posing and trying to be sexy and like doing, doing everything they can. Pulling out their canned lines or like not talking about that thing they like, because they're worried that the person they're talking to might not find it cool. So they instead talk about something they think is cool that they don't really care about. No.

Yeah. And you start sort of like projecting what you think people would find interesting. You know what I mean? So it's like you, you're good at a sport so like you feel like it's necessary to every chance you get shoehorn in that you're you know like oh i box i'm a boxer oh the boxing um and it's like all right dude we get it we don't like it's just not that interesting. Like, be you. That's a big reason. That's why. I really, really feel the scheduling thing. Because I have a very weird schedule.

As you know, I work in a bar. I exclusively work, like, weekend nights. And then I have a lot of other obligations. Like, Monday nights are for the boys. It is religion. It is my, is my, my, you know, church. And I,

I commit my Monday nights to, to the boys. Tuesdays usually, or like every other Tuesdays I'm recording for four hours. Our other podcast, no quest for the wicked. It's an actual play podcast. More like five or six.

Yeah. Right. So like, that's, that's usually a full night wednesday nights i know we're recording this on a tuesday morning but wednesday nights are also uh when we write record this show and sometimes we record two if we're doing pillow talk yep so it's like patreon exclusive if if you guys haven't heard about that hang on over to f buddies podcast click the patreon

link and sign up so that's three of my seven days. And then I work 12 hours for three other days. So I have like one day kind of unspoken for that. I either have to choose a date or friend hangouts or a recovery day where I like take care of myself. Yeah. So that's not a good choice because you need all three of those things yeah so i get it it's that's a tough it's tough to to make things work and like you know i do i make it work but sometimes unfortunately if it's a struggle to get going with a schedule and and to like just like see each other like it's not not going to get better. And I know that sounds defeatist, but what would need to change is someone would have to give up something that they probably don't want to give up in order to see the other person.

So you would have to probably give up an obligation to fit her schedule or she would have to do, you know, she would have to make some changes and give up something in order to fit your schedule. No, I don't necessarily agree. There is a certain amount of time and it's kind of like money. You know what I mean? It's like, oh, let's go do this thing. You're like, I don't have the money for it. And it's like, you might literally have the money for it, but it's just that it's not that important or that pressing or the money's more important for other things at times kind of like that that too so if this is so casual so far you probably only get a lot of certain amounts of time even if like our pinoy boy toy here wants a little bit more so what i'm saying is like if you upgrade yourself in terms of like being important they might have more time for

you right but that's never going to happen unless you have a talk and are like, Hey, I like you. I was just wondering, like, it sucks. I'll get to see you like once or twice. Uh, I was wondering, like, could we try to make this a little bit more of a regular thing or like talk about schedules and like do it in a non needy way, just in a way where you're impressing the importance of them to you and the fact that you like them and you want to see them more. I think that's a very doable conversation. And if they are freaked out by that, then you probably don't want to see them anyway.

And if they realize how much they mean to you and vice versa, maybe they'll have more time to commit to you because you're a little bit more important now. Because I feel like a lot of people are worried about putting all their eggs in one basket if that basket might not like them back, etc. And I will say while we're on the topic, with her being a famous influencer, I'm quite sure a lot of guys have been trying to shoot their shot. That's not a good thing. You know what I mean? They're probably fucking sick of that. So I don't think that's something you really need to be worried

about. I think it wasn't a good thing that all these men were interested. Like, no, I mean, it's not a good thing for them. Like anyone I know who gets a barrage of online attention for men, it's, it's agonizing.

Yeah. No, one's like pumped. You know what I mean? Someone's just like, Hey, like if you look at the fucking comments, they're bad.

If you see the DMS, they're worse. So it's like finding someone who they like who you know they can see multiple times who can talk to them like an adult like these are all very important things like that almost makes it less likely that they're loving their pool because they're probably sick of it i think it was someone who was super starved for attention and someone came by was like hey girl that would be far more of a big deal than someone who's just like oh please every time. Every time their phone beeps, they're

probably like, fuck. Yeah. And you're absolutely right. I wasn't saying to give up immediately because this wasn't working. Yes. Have the conversation and be like, uh, there've been several people who I, I, I really wanted to spend time with where I was just like, okay, how can we make this work? What does it look like? What can we do? You know, is it a matter of maybe doing things sort of outside the usual, you know, quote unquote, don't date time? Like, are we going to do afternoon hangs? Are we going to do, you know, sort of like midweek Tuesday night hangs? Like what works for you? And yeah, absolutely. Are we going to squeeze in a half an hour

coffee one day if we're both in a certain neighborhood? I don't know what they do for work. I don't know what you do for work. But maybe that is possible. Because you seem to like her like her. It's not like you just want to squeeze in an extra fuck. So maybe you can meet for coffee for half an hour. I remember when I was

starting my current relationship, even just those small flash in the pan meetups really kind of like boil you through the week. Yeah. Yeah, exactly. So absolutely. Like maybe you have a day that, that tends to, to not be filled with much. Be like, Hey, look, my Tuesdays are, are usually pretty open. Um, I would love, like, I really like hanging out with you and I'd love to see you more regularly. Like if you could free up a Tuesday, I'd love to hanging out with you and i'd love to see you more regularly like if you could free up a tuesday i'd love to like see you i'd love to do something i'd love to make tuesdays like our thing um and then and then go from there and see see what you can kind of finesse and wiggle in because now made a very good point that uh people people will do their best to

make the time for you if they want to. Um, and, and I'm not saying that people who are busy, cause like, again, I'm really busy and I, there are people who I do want to see where it's just like, I,

we, it just doesn't work, but yeah, like sometimes there is no wriggle, wriggle, wriggle room, not wriggle room. I guess that they both work and,

and that sucks. And you know, if someone is telling you that, like, gee, you got to take them at face value because people are fucking busy. But it's also if the conversations keep happening, if if you keep trying to hang out, like if every week you guys sit down and you try to make like plans and it just doesn't work. I think that's a good sign. Right. Like it was it would be different if you're like,

Hey, what are you up to this week? And they're just like, Oh, so busy. Sorry. And that's kind of all you get. You're rescheduling dates and they're happening. That's a very good sign. You know what I mean? Like this all seems to be a very good science. Like the fact that they're busy and they still squeeze you in no pun intended, uh, all good stuff. You know what I mean? And I think like just having the conversation is super cool i think it's it's hard you have to go very far to seem needy i think maybe if you don't accept their answers like if they're like oh i'm sorry like i have you know let's say they're a fucking model like everyone you seem to know and they're like oh i have a shoot for a week and you're like oh okay and then every day that week when you know they're like, oh, I have a shoot for a week. And you're like, oh, okay. And then every day that week when you know they're busy, you're like, oh, I wish you were, you know, that I think would be needy.

Or if you keep asking questions that they've answered or if like, you know, you're wheedling and like begging, those are needy. But if you're just like, hey, I really enjoy hanging out with you. I wish we could do it more. Like, do you think there's a way we could figure out a schedule or like, as Dane said, like on free Tuesdays, like what are your Tuesdays looking like coming up or anything like that that's not needy that's fucking cool yeah I think it's also very flattering no one's gonna be like oh this person wants to hang out with me more oh fuck that so I think the takeaway here is one uh don't overthink things as much as you can just be yourself you're doing fine right like every time we talk to you you're drowning in sexual opportunities and uh gorgeous women you're fine you're you're you clearly have the ability to attract people

and and people are attracted to you so relax sit in that confidence sit in the knowledge that like this person wouldn't be talking to you and rescheduling dates and hanging out with you if they weren't into you. Right. I say it all the time. People decide whether or not they they're into you like in a matter of seconds. And no one hangs out with people they're not into. Right. So especially as Dane said, like the level of effort being put in, if it was just like every now and

then it was like a, you up and you know, they showed up and then you wouldn't see them for like two months. And then, you know, maybe you were the third option and they just want to fuck you, which Hey, still not a bad second place. But like, if they're putting in this effort and they are very busy and they are rescheduling, they're sticking to that. that and like that's all good stuff yeah so relax take a deep breath be yourself try to try not to like put on a persona or try to guess what they will find attractive and just be you because at the end of the day they're not attracted to who you are then it's a waste of time anyway right because you can't put up a facade eventually at some point in time the the outward you know mask that you're wearing will crack

because i mean like if this goes somewhere and you guys get together and you move in they'll see who you are right they'll see the real you whether you're goofy or nerdy or like whatever it is that you tend to be pushed to the side to to project out as your like persona your confident persona it'll come apart at some point in time. So just be yourself. That's number one. Number two, put in an initial effort and really try to figure out something that works for your schedules. Be clear and be honest and direct that you do want to see them and you want to spend more time with them and you're into them. Yeah, you definitely don't want to beat around the bush and be coy and hint at things and hope that they're gonna, you know, just be straight up. Because again, if this

is a situation you want to move forward, the longer it doesn't move forward, the worse it's going to be for you. You know what I mean? Like you said, you're going on these dates, and you're not enjoying them because you're thinking about this other person. Like if this isn't going to go anywhere, the only way you're going to start enjoying other dates is if you get over this person. And the soonest way to get over this person, if it isn't going to go anywhere, the only way you're going to start enjoying other dates is if you get over this person. And the soonest way to get over this person, if it isn't going to work out, is to be honest and direct and get your expectations up front. And like, if it doesn't work out, yeah, it's going to fucking suck. But at least then you can move on instead of being stuck in this like gray area, like purgatory. Yeah, exactly. So have these conversations,

try to figure it out, put in the effort, be direct, be honest about your intentions. And if it still doesn't work, then you might just have to say, they're not prioritizing me. And it's not going to, there's no point sort of dragging yourself through something that someone isn't returning the amount of effort you're putting in. And that's, that's a call you have to make. We can't make it for you. You'll have to be like, okay, I'm putting in way more than I'm getting. And this now sucks. And I would encourage you at that point in time to do your best to move on and not keep picking at scraps whenever it's thrown your way. Because I think that you're better than that. You're worth more than that. So, you know, hold yourself to a higher standard when it comes to that kind of stuff.

But like this all seems good. Like I'm hoping it's going to work out. There are no bad signs to me. So, you know, hopefully the schedules can work out. And you know what? Sometimes it is just unavoidable and people are just really busy, you know? So if that is the case, like don't hold it against them. Because like, as Dane said, we're fucking busy as hell, right? Like we do so many things, too many busy, you know? So if that is the case, like, don't hold it against them because, like, as Dane said, we're fucking busy as hell, right?

Like, we do so many things, too many things, you know? Yeah, exactly. Well, good luck, and thanks for reaching out. Do you want me to hit you with a quick one, or you got one for me? I got one. I don't know why, because you're sleepy. I just assumed you had none. No, I got them last night.

Okay, this is VetchelFuel2627. Hookup asked me to take off condom while doggy her i a 35 year old male do quite well in dating apps and last night i took a girl home after meeting her for a few drinks and some random dancing at a bar after we fool around at my place i tell her this is so much fun i'm gonna go get a condom and she nods everything's great so far however after a while we were doing it doggy and she turns around, bites her lip and tells me, take that thing off. I want to feel you inside me. I always use protection with my hookups, but this time I just couldn't say no.

She had the most sexiest look and I really want to go bareback. I feel like it was unfair for her to even ask me at that moment. Luckily, I managed to pull out and come on her back. If we had changed positions to her on top, she could have easily made me come inside her. Has she asked for no condom because she felt a moment or was she trying to get pregnant she's only 22 in her last year of college so i doubt she's ready for a kid i can't speak to why she would say that it could well be that she has been socialized or like repeatedly told that that is a sexy thing and as a result she's just like cool this is now my move like i'm gonna pull. And as a result, she's just like, cool, this is now my

move. Like I'm going to pull it on you. Could be that she did just want to feel you without a condom inside her. Could be that it's a kink of hers. Or literally, I once saw someone who lied about being on birth control and would insist on having unprotected sex, which I usually avoided. But one time, anyway, people can do fucking insane things with risk. The flesh was weak. The flesh was weak. So maybe it is that she did want to get pregnant or has like a breeding fetish or something. I don't fucking know. But was it unfair of her to do that? Kind of. Should you have the fortitude to just say no? Yes. Yeah. At the end of the day, a request is a request. And if there's a part of you that sits back and says oh hey if she was on top she could

have made me come inside of her and that's not something that you wanted then this is not someone you should be having unprotected sex with or having sex with at all also stds dude like there's there's no surefire way to avoid them sure like you know what i mean there's no judgment if you get one whatever but does that mean you shouldn't take precautions? No. If my general rule is if someone tells me I don't need to use a condom, that usually is my sign that I should absolutely use your condom. And this, again, isn't a judgment call. But if you're saying not to use a condom with me,

I'm going to assume that you're not using a condom with any of your other partners. And no matter how much I trust you, I then that like that circle of trust now gets expanded to everyone you've slept with everyone they've slept with everyone they've slept. You know what I mean? Like it goes from me having a sexual experience with one person to me now having a sexual shared experience with potentially hundreds. Like it stands to reason that if you're not a big supporter of safe sex, the sex with you is less safe. Like it's, you know, you're not jumping through

mental hoops to figure that out. And I've been there. Like, I don't understand the amount of people who've been like, oh, just don't use a condom. And it's like, no, I will. I will. And I've had to be like, no, I will. will and like it kind of takes the wind out of the sails for like a second but like i'm glad i'm glad i did yeah at no point in time have i ever looked back and be like fuck i really wish i didn't wear a condom yes 100 and like the times where i haven't yeah i've been eternally grateful that nothing has happened and have actually wished like the person in question that I just mentioned. It turns out they were lying about being on birth control. Then I'm like, cool.

Why the fuck were they doing that? So I wish I had used a condom with them. Luckily, nothing happened, but it definitely could have. And again, you mostly did. I mostly did. Yeah. I mean, like, look, we've all had moments of weakness. It happens. I've,

as much as I am a proponent of using condoms, uh, for sex. Yeah. Have I, have I cracked under the, the temptations of, you know, uh, uh, uh, attempting offer? Of course, of course I have. Um, but like you said, um, every time I have, I've been like, fuck. And then I just sit and i worry for x amount of time being like yeah so it's uh it's it's it's just the peace of mind i get from where you're kind of being like i feel better about this and why would why wouldn't i want to have a sexual experience where in the back of my mind i'm not like hey this could end poorly yeah that's the thing it's like sure it's going to feel slightly better in the back of my mind i'm not like hey this could end poorly yeah that's the

thing it's like sure it's gonna feel slightly better in the moment but weighing that against like two three four five weeks of panic you know what i mean not great maybe i'm in a small minority i don't i don't think condoms really dull the sensation that much uh they do though i'd like a little bit but yeah it's you know like it's you know i like it both i don't really i don't really care it's like i feel like sometimes it can be almost too intense without a condom where it's like if it's just for my pleasure great but it's very rarely just for my pleasure and i would rather enjoy the experience a little bit longer and like be more in the moment with it than just being like oh yeah i'm a dick it's great yeah it's uh i so to answer your

question we have no idea why she did it we can't we can't guess this this is not who could know what lies in the heart of this woman who knows but what i would like why i brought the question is to uh encourage you to be strong and when someone asks you to remove a condom to really really think about it no matter how sexy and hot it might seem or is to be like actually you know what i'm gonna keep it on and then but like you could still like i've slept with people who oh wait you slept with people i once or twice i have i have had sex um and they've been like oh i want you to come inside me you can do that while wearing a condom right like oh yeah but i'd like i know i know like you could but like you can go through all the motions of making them

beg for it making them ask for it and like finishing inside someone right like the there's enough of like you can role play it out without actually doing it like without any of the risk and like that's something you can talk about with your partners if there if there is sort of like that that desire same thing with like if they want to be, you know, if they want to be ejaculated on somewhere specific, you just coordinate it. You could still do these things with a condom on. Like condoms come off. You can take it off and do it if you want. It might take a little practice until dexterity and finesse. But like, I don't know. I just want to encourage you to,

if a partner has a particular fetish involving how you finish to navigate that safely without giving up your desire to wear protection. Yeah, for sure. I feel like a lot of men find it hard to say no, because you're often ridiculed if you do. Oh, I don't want to have sex today. And then everyone's like, what the fuck's wrong with him? It's like, you have as much right and allowance and everything to say no as a woman, as anybody. So if you don't want to do something, exercise that right. If they have a problem with that, they don't deserve your dick anyway. Don't get caught. And it's like, hey, if you want to do it, sure. You got to weigh up your risks. You got to act in your best interest and just have be aware of the costs of the risks and make your own choice. Exactly.

To make the safer choice. But as previously stated, we don't always all the time. You know, it's all about mitigating risks, being aware. But take care of yourselves out there. And also, don't be afraid to say no. If someone asks you to do something you are uncomfortable on both sides of the table on every fucking side of the table the table is a big circle it's a big circle table just like time just like time uh are you ready yeah this is charlie cat 93 how to tell an andrew tate stan i'm not interested i 29 year old female went on the

second date you say with a guy 28 year old When we first met, it was at a bar. We had a great time. So when he asked for a second date, I was happy to go. But that all changed once we were out. On the date, he kept quoting Andrew Tate and stating how women need to be submissive to their husbands. He said he wants to be just like Andrew. He idolized the guy.

He kept asking me questions about my dating history. He even got jealous when I mentioned I have a personal trainer who's male. He took my picture without asking, sent it to his friends. I expressed I didn't like that since he didn't ask if it was okay, and he claimed since we were on public property, he can take a picture of whatever he wants. I told him I didn't like that. He shrugged it off and refused to delete it. He also flipped off the barista that served us our coffee at Starbucks and thought it was funny.

I should have left him when he did that, but I was his ride. When I was talking about a wedding I have to go to in a couple of weeks, he asked who was getting married. I explained my best friend and her longtime boyfriend who have three children together. They just wanted to make it official. The guy asked what the rules were in the house, and without thinking, I told him the boyfriend works when my best friend takes care of the kids at home. The guy on wit applauded it and said that was how it should be. He also talked about how my best friend needs to make sure she keeps her figure right to keep her man happy. I asked if the husband behaves poorly in the relationship, cheating, slash lying, etc. Doesn't she deserve happiness in the relationship too?

He stated if the woman stays in her place, those issues will never happen. If the husband cheats, there's a reason for it. He told me I need to ask myself, well, what would she do wrong to make him cheat? At this point, I was ready to take him back home. I made an excuse to end the date early and take him home. Later, he told me he liked me and wanted to see me more. I don't know how to let him down without him possibly blowing up. He showed childish behavior too while on the date and I wouldn't put a pass if he tried to be petty and act like an ass. I'll be running into him again since my

friend is dating his friend. Also, we live in the same area, so my chances of running into him again are pretty likely. How do I let him know I'm not interested in seeing him again? How the- oh, good lord. Good lord, you have the patience of a fucking saint yep i if i was at i mean like i've straight up called dates because they were assholes to the bartender well i would be no no not at all especially like there's one thing to be you know know, a dick at a bar, which is, you know, terrible and unforgivable. There's another thing to be a dick to the bar, like barista. Yeah.

Starbucks. It's like, there's no tipping culture there. You know what I mean? Like we, we as bartenders have thick skin because we know at the end of the day, we're walking home like $300 in our pocket. So like, whatever, be a fucking asshole. I don't care. I'm, I'm making

money and everyone else on the bar is chill. It's like, I'm going to make fun of you. Probably to your face and also in front of your friends. So, whatever. But like, the fuck did a Starbucks barista do to you? Get the fuck out of here. Also like, you're sober presumably in a Starbucks

and it's bright and they're just like, working for minimum, well I guess Starbucks has more's bright, and they're just like working for minimum. Well, I guess Starbucks has more than minimum, but at least benefits. I don't know. Either way, it fucking sucks. This person sucks. I don't enjoy that. And I wonder, remember we had that question ages ago about the flirty Starbucks guy who flirted with the...

Did this happen? Were they like, hey, here's your latte? He's like, fuck you, bro. Fuck you. Maybe. Maybe it is our just absolutely charismatic barista. Yeah, he struck again. Like that alone, that singular incident would be enough for me to call it.

And then to sit there and listen to all of that. And like, hey, look, it doesn't matter that you're his ride. I would have left the dude there and be like, cool, you're a strong man, right? Hold on. Shouldn't a guy have a car? Isn't that a traditional male archetype, stereotype thing? Why am I driving around? I don't have to do that.

You should be driving me around. Why didn't you pick me up? And then I would have just left. I will add to the bullshit in the comments the poster lets everyone know that he was also an actual martial arts instructor and kept talking about how he could easily overpower her super super cool yeah uh so i guess you know the whole like the whole point of like not having him blow up unfortunately massively appropriate in this situation because this doesn't seem like a person who's going to take anything well or cool yeah honestly i would

say i would literally just like it sucks you're gonna see him again it sucks that your friend is dating you know his friend or whatever but at this point i think you just need to be like honest straight up via you know text yeah and be like hey uh didn't really feel the spark thanks for your time uh good luck out there and just leave it at that you know what i mean like keep it very short keep it very simple um don't get into all the bull like don't be like hey i didn't find i thought you were disrespectful but like don't get into any of that don't give them any ammunition don't you know throw kindling on the fire just be like very polite very very brief and get out of there and then if he's a fucking lunatic tell your friends right be like hey i went on a date with this guy he's

getting real fucking aggro with me and i just want you to be aware of that and also if he does send you fucked up shit, don't be afraid to contact the police. You know what I mean? Like you can never know how this is going to go. But I think what Dane's saying is great. You might want to let them know where they're going wrong. You might want to, you know, in the hopes of changing them in the future and making them better. And unfortunately, your safety is far more important than you trying to probably in vain help this person or help the future women he's going to meet. It's not your job.

Your job is to be safe. I wouldn't even say that. Like, I wouldn't want to help the I would want to just like lamb. I was just like, hey, man, you're a piece of shit. Like, I know what I'm saying is, yes, as much as you would feel this urge. And I think a lot of people would want to say that to make them stop to make them realize you know yeah or anyway your safety is paramount so i think you could just be like oh sorry you know i i just didn't feel the spark thanks very much and like if

he presses you just be like uh like i don't even know if you should say like oh we have different values no i i would leave that out of it just leave the entire thing as dan said no ammunition no kindling just be vague and be like oh thanks very much and then like block yeah exactly that that would be my advice is to keep it short keep it sweet keep it so like cookie cutter that you know you could see he could see you giving that to uh you know the same liberal cook that i'm sure he hates yeah so just like leave it and then maybe just don't be alone with this person yeah exactly and maybe you know for the first little bit until uh you know he he changes targets on social group outings be like hey is is little tate jr gonna be there if if he is i might i might skip this one little drew tate little drew also if anyone listening is like hey that sounds like

what i do don't fucking do this don't be that fucking dude i i would be shocked if you listen to andrew tate and and it resonated with you and then also listen to us one would be a mistake like you'd either accidentally clicked onto our gun episode and we're like what the fuck and it resonated with you, and then also listened to us. One would be a mistake. You'd either accidentally clicked onto our gun episode, and we're like, what the fuck? Yeah, congratulations for sort of getting the whole picture. You're getting both sides of the pie. You're doing your own research.

Yeah, so I guess good for you. But yeah, I think we are pretty much antithesis to much of what Tate is talking about. I would hope so. But we should move into some Tinders. At the end of the show, we'd like to peruse online dating platforms such as Tinder, Bumble, Hinge, The Right Stuff, and comb through. Man, I fucking wish we had some Right Stuff profiles. I wish. I wish. I'm really tempted to get on there.

The problem is I think that the men's profiles would be absolutely choice. And the problem is we can't be gay. So I would, I would have to pose as a woman, which I'm not against. Anyway, we, we looked through the profiles on these platforms.

We see what works, but doesn't work in an effort to make your online dating experience a little more enjoyable. Okay. So I've got something a little different for this you're gonna write a message someone sent to someone after they matched with an older woman on a dating app okay right and this is technically a question technically a tinder i think it bridges the divide so i'm just gonna read you the question this is by sc666 why do like devil

scooby-doo i guess how's this message come across how to respectfully ask for casual relationship with an older woman 26 year old male looking for 40 plus year old woman having had a girlfriend limited sexual experience only had sex about 10 times always very drunk and never in the context of a loving relationship just one night stands only started on dating app matched with some older women typed out this message to send being completely honest do older women and women in general appreciate this level of honesty or do i come across weird and desperate hi i don't want to waste your time or lead you on so i'll tell you my situation and exactly what i'm looking for i haven't been intimate with someone

for a few years and i wasn't ever great at sex i would love a beautiful woman like you who's a bit older than me to show me how to be the best lover i can be and how to give a woman lots of pleasure in bed yeah man that's not the that sucks it sucks so much dude that's not the way to go it's demeaning it's reductive it completely kind of like takes them away from out of the equation apart apart from their age, their gender, and the fact that they can fuck, I guess. Yeah. You're just like, hi,

I would like to use you to, to yeah. Fuck until I'm good at it. Thank you. Also sex. So come fuck me. Am I angry at the very underlying intention of being like, I would like to meet someone who would be a sexual mentor for me.

No, I'm not angry at that. I think your approach is weird. I think it's bad. I think you're doing a bad job. You're doing a pretty shit job. This is a conversation that can be had, I think. But first you need to find someone

that you connect with. You need to talk to them like a normal fucking person and not just a, uh, how to have sex for dummies guide that has legs. Um, I think you need to go on a date with them, connect with them. And then you can be like,

look, you know, I'm, I'm an experience, blah, blah, blah talking. Um,

and again, not use this person as, as like your, your punching bag or like your training dummy your sex doll yeah and and just be open and honest with them in a sexual relationship and those things will come as a result of it right i think if you just ask questions if you're like hey what do you like and as you're you know if they're like oh i want you to use your fingers right now and you're fingering them be like does that does that feel good or you know tell me tell me how you like it

like if you ask questions you're gonna get the same experience without as now says like reducting them or reducing them down to uh like an object that you're going to use to benefit yourself personally at no great reward to them. Yeah. So you can go with other women you deem more important, which is basically what you're saying. So I think step one is not thinking about older women in this way. I don't know if you do, because it very much sounds like you do. And if that is the case, you need to fix that before you move on. Step two is not sounding like you think of women in that is the case, you need to fix that before you move on. Step two is not sounding like you think of women in this way, which when you've done step one, you need to work on. Step three is you're overthinking this whole fucking thing just in your profile, say looking

for something casual. And then you've kind of done all that. And then as Dan said, when you meet someone you like, when you go out on a date, at some point you can let them know you're inexperienced. Boom, you're done. Like that's how you do that kindly. And you probably don't even have to unveil that fact if you don't want to. Yeah. It's a simple conversation. Like as things are getting hot and heavy, just a simple like, hey, I really want to make things good for you.

I want to please you. So I'm giving you the open communication to like let me know what you like and if you want me to do something different you just let me know and i'll i'll do my best to to accommodate for you see that's fun i'm gonna be very happy to hear that yeah like that that's how you do it well this approach is so bad so do what we said and and like the the different like there isn't a whole lot of difference between what we just said and what you said but it's it's so much better at the same time uh so yeah just treat people like normal people and then once you get to a place where you want to have sex with them and they want to have sex with you just be just open a a direct line of communication and and be receptive to advice and like you'll get this you'll

you'll get this sort of like sage wisdom you're looking for and i'll tell you right now they don't have to be older women this this myth of you know oh this the sagely older woman to guide the young inexperienced man it's bullshit i guess since that was uh kind of like a question tinder hybrid let's do let's do a few a few quick quick tindies now you know i actually don't know if we've done this before but we might have this is anna i'm dyslexic so my spelling awful, but my oral is immaculate. That's it? That's it. Okay.

Is there a joke I'm missing with the oral being immaculate? I think they're saying because, you know, like speaking aloud, they can't write, but they can speak aloud fine because dyslexia doesn't affect that. Yeah. Okay. But it can. Yeah. No, it's not a great profile. Okay.

Yeah. Give it a five. Yeah. It's one of those things where I'm just like okay you've tried you've did something i guess but uh unless your your one-liner joke is an absolute fucking banger i would rather just have a slightly more boring because like the only thing i could really throw here is like a blowjob joke or talk about oral which i feel like isn't my vibe so i'm probably i like i don't know what else to

open with with what you're making dyslexic joke which is yeah uh yeah i i don't i think it's a bold move to just have a joke because that joke needs to fucking slay or else you're like huh and you you move on at the very least give me some fucking details about yourself as well because then that would save a bad joke or at least soften the blow especially if the joke is so sexual like yeah because like you're just like you're just opening the door to

like nothing but sex jokes or comments or whatever as like if that's what you want okay that's fine whatever but like for people like me that's not my vibe that's not my flavor I'm not going to be like I'd like to see how immaculate it is yeah and that's not my vibe that's not my flavor i'm not going to be like i'd like to see how immaculate it is yeah and that's the thing like you're giving even the people who don't want to just be sexual almost no other avenue yeah well it's just like hi how are you yeah i mean those

are your options right just like hello or you're hot i oral. Yeah, not the best profile. All right. This is nameless. About me. I don't want my time wasted. Two upside down smiley faces. I'm looking for something serious. No hookups or sex. I overuse emojis.

Yes, I smoke. Smoke emoji. 22. Devil emoji. Tongue emoji. I should probably add in here. I'm six months pregnant. Pregnant emoji. Looking for something serious. Been single for here i'm six months pregnant pregnant emoji looking for

something serious been single for 10 months it's just like a woman holding her belly okay while pregnant uh looking for something serious been single for 10 months i love coffee and being outside peace sign emoji party emoji i also have a pic of my car but i lost it so like please drive crying laughing emoji huh i also have a pic of my car but i lost it so like please drive crying laughing i'm very concerned about the future of this child because yeah i you know you shouldn't be leaving your kid in in your car but it does seem like you're able to lose an entire car i'm worried that you're gonna forget the kid in that car and then also lose that car hey you know what's easier to lose than a car a kid is a small child a small child like it's

smaller than a car so already significantly yeah already it's squishier than the car you could like squeeze it into spaces too. It can squeeze itself into spaces and move by itself, which a car can't do unless you forget to put the brake on, which on a very steep hill wouldn't put a pastor. This is like a one for me. Nothing good about this one. No,

I don't. I've been single for 10 months. It's like how long you've been single. No, shouldn't. Yeah. Shouldn't factor into like whether or not you should be in a relationship. Like you should get in a relationship when you find the right person and

you're ready. Not because X amount of time has elapsed. So like already this, I mean, they're also 22. So like they're young and haven't experienced anything while they've experienced pregnancy. I guess that's true.

You know, either way, not for me. No, it's a one like this is awful uh this is madison pros i will happily spend all my money on food cons i've spent all my money on food like kind of funny but again it's like are you are you actually telling me you're you've no money because like that seems shit yeah is your next line gonna be like pay for me spoil me or are you just telling me you're really bad at managing your life it's like how seriously am i supposed to take these jokes i don't take them seriously at all i i think it's cute i like it i'm giving it a seven i don't know

i think it's code for i am bad at managing my life i'll lose my car also i'm pregnant i think that is the the thing i'll give it a six it's just a joke it doesn't really give me anything and it's like it's funnier than the other one so okay here's steph steph has a bumble profile and steph says i got banned from tinder i'm here now i would absolutely like anytime i would love to know how you get banned from tinder i feel like i know how i could get banned from Tinder. But as a woman, yeah. Yeah. That's my thing is like as a lady getting banned from Tinder, you've probably got to do some pretty wild shit.

Like probably some very wild shit. Well, actually, you know, that's not true. A friend of mine has been like permanently banned on Tinder and they gave no explanation. Like they didn't do anything. They hadn't taught and just like that's just what they say no apparently apparently tinder just like bans accounts and then like when you try to appeal it and be like hey like take a take a gander they're just like no now the thing is that's what someone who did something real fucked up would say like oh no there's no reason i mean yeah i guess so it's a it's a tan right

because you know she freaky if she got bad you know she crazy speaking of freaky this is kiara okay i'm into that freaky shit just so you know beforehand either at the gym or home don't think you can handle that crackhead energy i just want to simp for someone or i just want to simp with someone i enjoy thrifting fashion gaming cosplay gaming, cosplay, music, etc. Tinder won't let me change my age. Sad face. I'm actually 18. I enjoy thrifting, fashion, gaming, cosplay, music, etc.

Body like a Greek goddess, but the mentality of a goofball. Did they repeat their likes twice? Yep. Okay. What a goofball thing to do. What a goofball. I don't love the phrase crackhead energy um because it's pretty demeaning and also still not a great thing i would assume either yep they're into the freaky shit either at home or at the gym or are they unrelated sentences i think they're saying that

they are either at home or at the gym okay one of those two places i guess i could work from home it's a post-pandemic world yeah i don't love it i don't love it overall it seems a little try-hardy also what age is listed 20 so that means they've been pretending to be 18 for two years on tinder they joined on as when they were 16 yeah Yeah. That's really red flag vibes. Yes. So I'm going to give it a zero. Is no bueno for me. Yeah.

I like lying to people that you're 18 when you're under age. Super not fucking okay. Yeah. Zero, zero, zero. Yep. That is,

that is where I would go on to. Uh, that's going to do it for this episode. Friends. Thank you very much for hanging out with us this week. This early, early morning. It is,

it is 1230 PM. It is not. It is afternoon. Don't tell them our shame. I was just thinking, I was like, damn, people are going to be like,

wow. And what time it is. And then you just went and ruined it. But we appreciate you being here, regardless of what ungodly early hour that we got up and recorded this one. Guess what? What? Last Wednesday, the 5th of October, we've been doing this podcast for four years.

That's crazy. It's wild. It's a crazy thing to say to me. Fucking wild. Especially this early. I know. So thank you to everyone who's been here. Earlier the better.

But you know what? It doesn't really make all that much of a difference. Is this your first episode? We fucking love you too. Thank you to Namibia. Thank you Earlier the better. But you know what? Doesn't really make all that much of a difference. This is your first episode. We fucking love you too. Thank you to Namibia. Thank you to the Philippines. OG number one. OG number one. If you'd like to support the show, please head on over to FBuddiesPodcast.com

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get. It's true. It's true. So please come support us we would fucking love that thank you to josh eagle and the harvest cities for their song paper stars and you ready for some bad sex running yeah oh yeah what do you sound sad i just i'm sad it's over that's fair well we can keep going we make this an uber long episode no okay well this this is a tweet i saw today i figured it would it would work. I don't know if I should reference the person that tweeted it out, so I'm just not going to. And they say, I've just gotten a dick pic in my DMs.

This was the message. I've got it minty fresh for you. Let's put that beautiful mouth of yours to good use. Open wide. And the gentleman had smeared toothpaste all over his penis. Fascinating. I was going to say, minty fresh is is fucking weird thing to call your dick not smothered in toothpaste not smothered in toothpaste like look i promise you that man regrets that

because i bet that burned i there's no way it didn't why what okay guys buckle buckle your shit in buckle up i don't know what you're doing out there, but this is not it. This is not the way. Could be, though. She didn't say she didn't like it, though, did she? She was fascinated. Fascinated. My name is Dave Miller.

And I'm Mal Spain. We've been your fuck buddies. you