Financial Feminist - 191. How to Actually Change Your Life with Science-Backed Manifestation Expert Mimi Bouchard

Episode Date: October 7, 2024

What if there was a NEW way to visualize that was 10x more effective? And what if that method was backed by science? In today's episode, I'm joined by Mimi Bouchard, the visionary founder of Superhuma...n Activations—a groundbreaking app that's redefining activations and visualization practices. We go deep into the transformative power of visualization, sharing personal stories about how manifesting has shaped our lives, and exploring actionable strategies to hack your brain for success. Mimi opens up about her journey from having just $7 in her bank account to building a multimillion-dollar company, all by harnessing the power of self-image and visualization. If you're eager to up-level your career, relationships, or personal growth, this conversation is packed with insights and practical tips you won't want to miss. Read transcripts, learn more about our guests and sponsors, and get more resources at https://herfirst100k.com/financial-feminist-show-notes/191-the-scientifically-backed-way-to-change-your-life-with-manifestation-expert-mimi-bouchard/ Mimi’s Links: For a limited time only, get a massive discount off your Superhuman subscription. To access this exclusive deal visit activations.com/ffpod. Offer applicable to Financial Feminist listeners only. Not sure where to start on your financial journey? Take our FREE money personality quiz! https://herfirst100k.com/quiz Are you registered to vote? https://vote.org/ Special thanks to our sponsors: Thrive Causemetics Get an exclusive 20% off your first order at thrivecausemetics.com/FFPOD Squarespace Go to www.squarespace.com/FFPOD to save 10% off your first website or domain purchase. Masterclass Get an additional 15% off any annual membership at masterclass.com/FFPOD. Rocket Money Stop wasting money on things you don’t use. Cancel your unwanted subscriptions by going to RocketMoney.com/FFPOD. This is Small Business Check out This Is Small Business, an original podcast from Amazon, on your favorite podcast app.

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Starting point is 00:00:00 So you must visualize with your body in everyday moments, being your future self. You don't need to carve out 30 minutes every morning to sit down and do a meditation and then open up your eyes and it's like, okay, I'm back to my old habits and routines because it's such a focused way of doing it. And that's still great. And I still think meditation is good for you and I probably should be doing more meditation, but I am more in the camp of activation, which is a different approach. It is more for the ambitious and energized woman.
Starting point is 00:00:33 Have you seen the perfect couple? Here's the deal. If you're going into it thinking it's going to be as good as Big Little Lies or it's going to be, you know, some like, I don't know, The Bear. It's not, it's not like highbrow TV, but it is murder mystery and thriller and fun. And Nicole Kidman is her hottest fuck. She's a public person, best selling author that has money but has a backstory. And then every single character is also a piece of shit with the backstory. And it's very fun. She's iconic. She's fantastic. It's set in Nantucket. So it's like, just beautiful. And if you need like stimulating TV that isn't anything good, perfect couple. Okay, today's episode is very, very fun. We have an incredible entrepreneur on the show who has a product that I truly love and
Starting point is 00:01:30 use and that's why I'm so excited to have her. Her app is called Superhuman. It is like a combination of visualizations and meditations and a podcast based on certain things you're doing in your life. So if you are going on a walk, you can listen to these visualization affirmations as you're walking. If you're packing for a trip, this is one of my favorite ones they have. It allows you to set intentions for the trip.
Starting point is 00:01:59 I'm the person that wants stimulation, if that makes sense. I want things to listen to, but I don't always want to think. I don't always want it to be a podcast. I don't always want it to be an audio book where I have to super pay attention. I talk about this in the episode, but we're discussing manifestation, but really what we're talking about is visualization. And it's kind of been a huge buzzword over the past couple of years. And let me tell you, although it does sound woo woo, it a hundred percent works.
Starting point is 00:02:24 Like it has worked in my life. Any success I've had with the business, I have visualized it. I have set my goals to achieve it. So we talked today about how I use visualization in my entire life, but especially in our business. We talk about the actual science behind visualization. It's not all woo woo. And we also talked to Mimi, our guest today, about how to hack your own brain using audio as this visualization tool. Mimi Bouchard is an entrepreneurial trailblazer who has defied convention by making radical changes to pursue her vision of creating a new type
Starting point is 00:03:00 of audio activations offered on her top rated app, Superhuman Activations. Haleyne is one of the OG personal development bloggers for almost a decade. Mimi has accumulated over 250,000 followers across her social media platforms with her journey to success resonating deeply with her audience. Superhuman, her groundbreaking luxury motivational audio app was founded just two years ago, and it's quietly amassed tens of thousands of subscribers and millions in yearly revenue, including high profile devotees like Miranda Kerr. And I'm going to throw myself in there too. I'm going to lump myself in with Miranda Kerr. And it's changed the way we think about meditation. Designed to fit seamlessly into daily life, activations are functional audios designed to help subscribers make the most of moments every day to live the life they've always
Starting point is 00:03:43 imagined. Mimi has become a new pragmatic motivational voice for women globally, earning comparisons to Mel Robbins for her no-nonsense advice and measurable results. And her debut book is launching in spring 2025. So if you are someone who is trying to achieve your goals, is trying to change your life, is trying to up-level your relationships or your career or your business, this is a great episode and super actionable. And please check out Superhuman Activations. I've been absolutely loving them, truly.
Starting point is 00:04:10 All right, let's go ahead and get into it. But first, a word from our sponsors. This episode of Financial Feminist is sponsored in part by Rocket Money. This is small business, master class, thrive cosmetics, and Squarespace. Rocket Money is a personal finance app that tracks your spending, cancels unwanted subscriptions, and lowers your bills. Cancel your unwanted subscriptions by going to rocketmoney.com. This Is Small Business podcast gives you the expert tips you need to start, grow, and succeed in business. Listen to This Is Small Business on your favorite podcast app and take your business to the next level.
Starting point is 00:04:45 Learn from the best to become your best with Masterclass. Get 15% off any annual membership at masterclass.com slash FF pod. Thrive Cosmetics lets you refresh your everyday look with foolproof vegan products made with clean, skin loving ingredients. Get an exclusive 10% off your first order at thrivecosmetics.com slash FF pod. Build a beautiful website to get your message out into the world with Squarespace. Go to squarespace.com slash ffpod to save 10% off your first website or domain purchase. So, Liz Moody, she talks about circ walks and it's like circadian walks. So you like within a half hour waking up, you get up and go outside.
Starting point is 00:05:41 It doesn't even have to be a walk if you don't want to. But like at least 10 to 15 minutes up to a half hour. So the idea is that you're getting near circadian rhythm of like, hello, I'm awake, sunshine in my eyeballs. And then apparently it helps with everything. It's like digestion. It's how awake you feel. It's your sleep. And so our team has started doing circ walks almost every day. Well, I want to join your team. That sounds fabulous. I totally believe it. I love walking in the morning. I don't do it every morning, but when I have my dog with me, we'll go on little walks in the morning and I feel the difference. It's just the best way to start the day. Yeah. And the whole thing is like you can't do it with sunglasses. You want the light
Starting point is 00:06:23 to get in your eyes. And so yeah, yeah, it's very interesting. Yeah, it's been a it's been a nice little routine. So this was my shirt from my circle. It's like, I got to get it in before I talk to you. Well, you look amazing. Oh, you're made up and beautiful. I'm a little gremlin, but I appreciate it. Listen, it's 5 p.m. for me. It's 9 a.m. for you. 9 a.m. for me. You can put you some slack here. I appreciate it.
Starting point is 00:06:49 We love asking guests what their first money memory is. What is the first time you can think about thinking about money? Oh my gosh. Lack. Feeling lack and having desire for money. Growing up, my family didn't have much. My parents are both artists and they always struggled when we were younger. And I was very close to wealth
Starting point is 00:07:17 because some grandparents had a bit of money, friends at school had some money, and I just remember feeling immense shame Around not having what everyone else had so that's one of my earliest memories sadly How do you feel like that shaped your relationship with money as you grew up? It definitely motivated me to Create financial Freedom for myself. I think in a good way, it created that motivation, but then there was also a bad part of this,
Starting point is 00:07:52 you know, motivation as well, where it was everything that I wanted for so long, and I put such a big focus on it, and yes, I achieved it, but I have this bittersweet feeling when I think about this because it was so all-consuming and I had to create extreme financial freedom for myself to realize that oh yeah there are other things in life that also really matter. Yeah I've been always quite all or nothing and And I think money and wealth, it's a beautiful thing to have. I know we both agree. It's amazing to have money.
Starting point is 00:08:32 It's a protection. It's freedom. You're able to do what you want if you have enough money. So I definitely love and respect money. I have a very good relationship with money. But I wish, thinking back when I was younger, I wish I knew that it just it wasn't everything. It's something, but it's not everything. Yeah. Well, I think especially coming from a background of scarcity,
Starting point is 00:08:56 it's very easy to then believe, oh, money will solve everything. And you're right. I think money I talk about all the time, like people say money can't't buy happiness and I call bullshit on that. I'm like, it can to, you know, it can buy you stability. It can buy you safety. It can buy you security. But it's to your point, it also isn't everything. And if you are, you know, the I think people say money can't buy you happiness in the like, if you buy a Ferrari expecting it to cure your depression, that's not going to work. It is interesting that you went from a background of scarcity to almost the exact opposite, trying to solve that problem. Absolutely. And I agree, money has brought me happiness. And I'm happy to say that. But
Starting point is 00:09:38 it also, if I have a bad day, like, you know, having money isn't necessarily going to fix it, it'll just make me more comfortable. With all of this being said, I would way rather life with money than a life without. And I am so grateful that I've created this type of life for myself because I can spend my days doing whatever I want and I don't have to look at the price tag on things when I go to shops. And, you know, it's created this life that feels very good. And I, from a young age, have always felt like I've, I was meant to live an abundant
Starting point is 00:10:10 life financially. And it does live up to the hype. But then yet you also realize there are other areas. There are other categories of wealth, whether that's your health, your relationships, your fulfillment. I don't like when people say rich people aren't happy because sure, there are a lot of wealthy people that aren't happy, but there are a whole lot of poor people as well that aren't happy. It's just different reasons. Exactly. It's not a good indicator of that. So it's definitely an interesting topic.
Starting point is 00:10:38 I'm so excited to be on your show today, Tori. I love everything you talk about and I am very honest about money. I'm very honest about what I do with my money. So I'm really excited to get into this. Well, in the spirit of that transparency, you talk a lot in your story about how you started as an 18 year old, moved to London, you're kind of broke, miserable. You talk about having $7 in your bank account. Can you take me back to that time? Was that an extension of the scarcity? And like, what did that financial strain feel like?
Starting point is 00:11:08 Absolutely, I really did kind of just drop everything when I could move out of the house. I was born and raised in Toronto in Canada, and I felt like I just needed to get out. At that point, I had gone through a pretty difficult teenage year time in my life from the ages of 12 to 18, really I had quite a difficult time. I lost myself, I partied way too much and did a lot of drugs
Starting point is 00:11:34 and I just was going down a wrong path. Then I discovered personal development around the age of 18, 19, which I'm so thankful that I found it at such a young age, I really needed it. I had bad eating disorders, severe depression. I was doing whatever drug I could get my hands on. I was just not aligned with my happiest version of Mimi. And yeah, so I found personal development
Starting point is 00:12:00 and it really was the thing I needed at the time. And I decided to take a crazy risk and move across the world to London, England. And we have like a working holiday visa so I can spend two years there. And I decided that I would start an online magazine, become an entrepreneur, like create this life for myself. And I was, I just had this fire deep in my belly that just started coming out. And I look back and I'm just, I feel so thankful that I had this deep belief in myself because no one else had that belief in me. When
Starting point is 00:12:32 I told my family that I was moving, you know, I remember a random uncle was like, all right, I'll see you in four months. You're not going to make it. Like no one believed in me. My parents, you know, they, they were kind of just like, all right, like go for it, honey, but we're here if you need to come back home. So I felt like I was really the only one. And I think at the beginning of your journey, like you are going to be probably the only one that believes in you.
Starting point is 00:12:56 And you have to really curate that relationship with yourself. It's the foundation of all of this. And then I moved to London and I was working four jobs while trying to make my online magazine a reality. I was waking up at 6 a.m. and going to work at a juice bar. I always liked working at juice bars because I've always been really into health and a $15 salad or $10 smoothie was like completely out of budget. So I'd always work at these juice bars so I could get the food for free. And then I would go intern at this fashion agency across the city in the afternoons and then I would babysit at night for this Italian family with three
Starting point is 00:13:35 crazy kids. And then I would do random odd jobs like dog walking or like, you know, just dog sitting. I always loved pets as well. So I would do that. And yeah, there was a moment when I was in London where I literally had, I think it was like seven or nine pounds in my bank account. And I was running late for my juice bar job and I had to call my sister who was living in Australia at the time.
Starting point is 00:14:00 I missed the bus and I literally didn't have enough money in my bank account to get an Uber to go to my job. So from Australia, like a core memory was my sister calling me an UberX that costs £10 or something like that so that I could get to work on time. I think back at that time and I just feel so grateful that I kept going because it really felt like I had come face to face with a lot of walls and blockers, but I had this energy inside of me, this deep
Starting point is 00:14:30 self-belief through the work that I was doing, through the personal development books that I was reading. I was really creating this new self-image. Now fast forward nine years, I live in the Bahamas most of the year. I just bought a multimillion dollar home in Chelsea in London that I'm now sitting in with my own money. And I live a life that I once dreamt of. I own a company that is worth multiple tens of millions of dollars.
Starting point is 00:14:57 And I'm helping thousands of people around the world with my work. It's an app called Superhuman Activations. And it's a new type of audio that helps you align your self-image with the person that you want to be, which is essentially the work that helped me get to where I wanted to be. So it's really this incredible journey I feel like I've been on over the past almost decade, and I could almost get emotional when
Starting point is 00:15:25 I think about it because I don't think about my story enough. And I love doing podcasts like this because it reminds me of where I was such a short time ago. And I did it. And I am happy to share everything I learned along the way with anyone wanting to listen because I believe that anybody can also change their lives. It's not just my wealth that I transformed. It is my body and my health
Starting point is 00:15:51 and my relationship with myself. It is my personal relationships. It's my self love and just quality of life, everything transformed. I can't recognize the person I was 10 years ago and I really needed a transformation. I needed to become more myself after years of losing myself. So I'm just, yeah, I'm so grateful and I'm happy to share what worked for me along the way. It's possible for anyone is the other thing I just really want to say. I remember back when I was starting my personal
Starting point is 00:16:23 development journey, there weren't that many women that spoke about their financial transformations. It was really mostly just men, especially back then personal development was like white men on the cover of books with like their thumbs up, you know, like there was never anyone that looked like me. So like, I'd love to be that person for someone, especially a young woman. We can create financial freedom and abundance for ourselves. We can earn tens of thousands of dollars a month. You can retire your parents and help your family, which is the most fulfilling thing that I feel I've experienced, you know, back in the day. Not to go on a rant, sorry, Tori. I just saw so many things are coming to my mind back in the day. I remember I'd think about like, oh, I could buy that handbag
Starting point is 00:17:09 when I have money. But now it's like those dreams that were on my vision board once, yes, I've achieved the number of the bank account that was on my vision board, but maybe that car or that handbag that was also in my vision board doesn't really hold the same weight as it used to. You kind of realize as you create this, things that really matter and money can do so much for you. And giving to the people that you love has been the most fulfilling thing for me throughout this journey as well. I have so many planned questions for you. I don't get to those in a second, I promise. But one thing that you, the through line, I think, think to all of that of all of what you just said is the belief in yourself and
Starting point is 00:17:48 This community of women right we have five million women and I talk to them all the time I hear what they're struggling with and All of the you know personal finance stuff of course, but I think it really does come down to That we as women have been made to not trust ourselves. We've been made to not believe that we are worthy of love and opportunity and a good job or a successful business or money. And then when we have the audacity to maybe think we're worthy of those things, society, patriarchy, white supremacy, all of these things start convincing us again, like, who are you to want this? Who are you to believe that you can do this? And I think you and I are very similar
Starting point is 00:18:38 in this of I have known my worthiness from a very young age. And I have a lot of things I have to work on and a lot of things I'm developing as in terms of my, you know, my personality and how I see the world. But one thing that's never, ever been a challenge for me is knowing that I am worthy and that I am worthy of all of the things I want. So do you have any advice or any tips for people listening who are doing the like, I can't start a business because I don't know enough or I can't negotiate for this job because they're going to think I'm ungrateful. Like how do we get to a place of worthiness? It is such an important question and I want to preface this with the acknowledgement and the mutual feeling
Starting point is 00:19:27 of you just mentioning here that you still have things you're working on. I still have so much that I'm working on myself and the one biggest thing that I thought I would achieve when I created this life, like I'm currently now living my quote, future self life that back in the day I visualized and I wanted. And I used to think that when I got here, everything would be perfect. And what I didn't realize is that, no, I've never had one perfect day in this entire journey
Starting point is 00:19:58 of creating the life of my dreams. I've never had one perfect day where I woke up exactly at 6 a.m. And I did a perfect morning routine and I didn't procrastinate once and I and your aura score was 95 Yeah, and I like ate organic and I did intermittent fasting and then I didn't have technology before bed I've never had one of those days in the past nine years not one, but I still achieved Yeah, that's success. That's success I see today. So I just, one of the biggest learnings that I've had throughout this experience is that like,
Starting point is 00:20:30 you're, we're always going to be works in progress and it's, we're never just reaching a destination. There's always going to be something that we want to work towards. So there's also finding that balance of loving who we are in ourselves now while also striving for more. And I just wanted to mention that because I feel like if someone listening was like me, you know, eight, nine years ago, very, very perfectionistic, ambitious, and you know, has very high standards for herself and her life,
Starting point is 00:20:58 I feel you, you're gonna get there, but also understand that it's not going to require perfection. What it requires is a quick bounce back rate, which is something I talk about. It's the rate at which you bounce back into being your future self from your old self. We can get more into that later. To answer your question about worthiness, when in my teenage years I didn't feel worthy, I felt extremely insecure.
Starting point is 00:21:24 I had severe body image and self-image issues. It's one of those things like a muscle that you just have to work and you just have to go to the gym, as they say, and do the inner work, the inner gym work to feel that worthiness. What really helped me when I was in a time that I didn't feel like deserving of these things, was simply the understanding, the truth, the belief that I am 100% responsible for my life. So if I want to create a life where I'm earning a hundred grand a month, I can do it, but it's up to me. So removing the victim mentality that I had was one of the most important stepping stones in my journey because when you realize that you can have that thing you want,
Starting point is 00:22:15 you know, it's possible. That's all you need to know. Your worthiness is going to increase kind of as you work. It doesn't have to be perfect before you start. Everything improves as you start taking action. So I wouldn't even say that you have to sort your worthiness out before even starting. You have to start and then it will sort itself out as you go. But just the understanding, the belief, the knowing that you can create that life you want should be enough. It's up to you. And this also empowers you to take the essential actions and steps to getting there.
Starting point is 00:22:55 Because when you're in that victim mentality, you don't even take action because you don't even think you're in control. You don't even think that it's up to you, your future. So that's the other massive thing that helped me on my journey. I was such a victim when I was younger. And now it's like, okay, if I want it, I can create it for myself. And there might be limitations, but I also, I'm going to start looking at the advantages. Yes, maybe I'm not, you know, a guy or people don't take me as seriously because I put makeup on and I look a certain way, but that's okay, I'm gonna use that to my advantage.
Starting point is 00:23:27 And I can try to find ways to utilize that and just being more of an optimist is something you can learn. It's not like you're just born with it, a lot of people are, but you can learn it. I learned it and it's worked out for me pretty damn well. I love this conversation with Mimi. And if you want to check out all of her superhuman activations, she is letting financial feminists
Starting point is 00:23:51 try it risk free for two weeks. These audios have the ability to completely impact your life, to visualize your future self and it's the shortcut to getting where you want to be. So to access this two weeks free, you can go to activations.com slash FF pod. You can get a massive discount off your subscription after that if you like it. This discount is only available through the website, not in the app store. They also offer a money back guarantee, no explanations needed. So if it doesn't work for you, you can get your money back. So once again, you can go to activations.com slash
Starting point is 00:24:23 FF pod to get your 14 day trial and a discount on your subscription. Okay, back to our conversation. We talk a lot in my work about, you know, all of the systemic issues that people face, you know, sexism, ableism, homophobia, trillion dollar student debt crisis, right? Like there's, there's a lot of privilege, I think, in you and I story. student debt crisis, right? Like there's a lot of privilege, I think, in you and I's story. And also, I think what you're saying is exactly correct, which is how do you control the things that you can control to optimize your life, your decisions, your choices to get to where
Starting point is 00:24:58 you want to be? Now, there's going to be external barriers that we have no control over that are going to make this harder or going to sometimes make it even impossible. But I do think that there is a version of our lives that can acknowledge those barriers, understand that the path is going to be more difficult. And yet also, if you want something, let's advocate for you getting it. Let's figure out how you can get there. Well, the truth is that there are countless people that started in a more difficult position than the person listening or me or you that achieved it.
Starting point is 00:25:38 You know, there are these incredible stories of people that started in completely different positions that had all the odds stacked against them that created this life for themselves. And I think that if you're listening right now and you want to create a bigger and better life for yourself, just flood your mind with those stories of possibility. That's all I'm gonna say because what you believe you create, what you believe you become, and going to say because what you believe you create, what you believe you become, and your beliefs are genuinely the root to all of your life. So flood your mind with these positive stories, with these incredible opportunities that could
Starting point is 00:26:18 happen. Start to daydream about bumping into that person who could lead you to this thing and then that opportunity comes up, trick your mind, retrain your reticular activating system in your brain, your RAS, and that's the filtration system in your brain that essentially decides what you consciously notice or don't notice. Just this very simple example of a red car. We've probably all heard it all before. If you're looking to buy a red car, you start seeing it everywhere. It's not that they started manufacturing them more. It's
Starting point is 00:26:50 because your RAS was triggered to notice it. When you start to notice the things that you feel could benefit you in your journey, you start to take action on them. You start to see them. And the RAS works from the red car example to empowering belief examples. If you truly believe you're 100% responsible for your life, you're going to start seeing opportunities everywhere that prove that to you. You're going to be looking for them. And it's the most incredible phenomenon that we literally can train our brains what to notice. It's life-changing. And that's why I believe this work, this self-image reprogramming work is the make or break for anyone's success, happiness, relationship, fulfillment, because it literally changes
Starting point is 00:27:42 systems in your brain from a very scientific level. This is not woo-woo. We can get into more of the woo-woo stuff, but this is actual facts. And it's incredible how much power we hold. That transitions me perfectly. I have to tell you something that I don't know if I've ever admitted out loud, and that I definitely have never said on the show. So I am a
Starting point is 00:28:06 visualization manifestation total believer and for listeners that might surprise you because I am more you know left-brained and very scientific I'm very you know methodical. I for years probably since I was a kid before I knew it was what I was doing and And here's my little confession. In the shower, I will sometimes still do this. In the shower, I would interview myself like I was sitting for an interview with Cosmo, or like I was sitting for an interview
Starting point is 00:28:37 with Good Morning America. In the shower, I'm shampooing my hair. I still do this, and it feels so embarrassing, but this works. I would do the like, somebody asked me a question in my head and I out loud would answer it. Like, oh, what is the song you can't live without? I like, oh, this song, this song.
Starting point is 00:28:54 I still do this. Like I interview myself, like I'm on Good Morning America or on a red carpet. And I do feel like that was the first version of what I now do more intentionally, which is manifesting my goals. I've written about this in my book, I've talked about this is that my favorite goal setting hack is writing down my goals as if they've already happened. So I'm a big Try Guys fan, I wanted to
Starting point is 00:29:19 work with them for years, I wrote down in my journal, I loved working with the Try Guys, even though we had not met, they did not know I existed, nothing happened. And then last year, I got to be in one of their videos. And that was a big, huge fucking deal for me. And so we got to talk about the power of visualization and manifestation because I do feel like it gets a bad rep sometimes as like, oh, it's woo woo, white girl bullshit, which, you know, sure, maybe. But I think also it has worked for me. So let's talk about the science of it. Let's talk about like how you use it in your life.
Starting point is 00:29:56 And was I manifesting when I was a kid interviewing myself in the shower? Well, first of all, I just want to say, I love this, Tori, and I believe that you absolutely did. And there are many different ways you can look at, let's just say, the word manifestation. I actually don't even like to use that word so much
Starting point is 00:30:15 because like you said, it has these preconceived notions and some people think it's bull, bullshit. I know you're allowed swearing on this podcast. So that's- You almost said bull crap and it was so cute. I'm not a big sweararing on this podcast. You almost said bullcrap and it was so cute. I'm not a big swearer anyway. You don't have to be. That's fine. I just think I haven't heard of bullcrap in a while and that was so funny. I was like, oh, cute. I love it. Yeah. You know what? Bullcrap's my new word. But to answer your question,
Starting point is 00:30:44 yeah, I don't like to use the word manifestation that much because of these preconceived ideas of what that word is. And there are a lot of gurus out there that promote that, you know, all you need to do is think it and it will appear in front of you and you don't need to do anything else. That's not the camp that I sit in. I am a lot more pragmatic. I teach a very pragmatic approach. I also just finished last week week I handed my manuscript in.
Starting point is 00:31:06 I just finished my book. It's coming out with Hay House in the spring. And I have done so much research on this by writing this book this past year. So everything that I knew, even beyond that, I've been even more convinced while writing my book that this work works. And it doesn't matter how you explain it. All that matters is that it works. So a spiritualist will call it the law of attraction.
Starting point is 00:31:30 A Christian might call it prayer. An atheist will call it the placebo effect. A scientist will call it quantum physics. And a psychologist will call it the RAS or the placebo effect as well. And all I know is that this work truly works when you commit to it and you truly believe that it's going to work. You don't need to know how. And to be totally honest with you, Tori, I don't have one belief system of what the how is. I am a little bit
Starting point is 00:32:03 spiritual, but not overly. I don't even know exactly what I believe in. I don't know, I'm still trying to figure it out. I'm in a phase in my life where I'm trying to figure out what my beliefs are, but all I know is that this stuff works and it's part of how the universe works. And just to break it down in a very simple way, visualization to me is simply reprogramming your self-image. The father of self-image psychology, Dr. Maxwell Maltz,
Starting point is 00:32:31 wrote a book in the 50s called Psycho-Cybernetics. It was one of the books that changed my life. My grandfather told me to read it about five years ago. And it's all about how your self-image will literally create your entire life. It will create your personality. Your personality will influence what you do, how you think, what you say. It's not even about your thoughts.
Starting point is 00:32:54 It's about your self-image. Think about an onion. The core of the onion is your self-image. When you change that self-image and you tweak it, all the other layers will naturally change. Your actions, your thoughts, your personality, how you walk, how you talk, what you produce. So, you know, there are books that say all you need to do is change your habits, but that's a very difficult way of transforming. Because changing your habits is hard when your self-image has not adjusted with your new self yet.
Starting point is 00:33:26 Does that make sense? So your future self is what I call it. The ultimate version of you that you aspire to be. And if the word future self does not align with you, you can use the word your favorite self or your best self or your highest self. I use future self and I believe that you can live your future now. So it's not necessarily thinking of a version of you that's never in reach. I believe even in this moment, I'm acting as my future self. So what you need to do to transform your life, it's very simple. There are two steps.
Starting point is 00:33:54 The first step is clarity and the second step is becoming. So you must first get crystal clear So you must first get crystal clear on your future self persona, your future self self image. What are her thoughts? How much money does she earn when she wakes up in the morning? What does she do? What does she look like? How does she hold herself?
Starting point is 00:34:16 How does she walk? What's her posture like? How does she treat people? You must get so clear on how it feels to be her. Now this is very important for visualization. And I'm sure you did this in the shower because you were acting out and acting as if and using mental rehearsal to align yourself
Starting point is 00:34:35 with a new energy, a new possibility. But I'm sure you felt it, Tori. It's not just thinking it and speaking it. It's about feeling it with your body, I believe. and there is a lot to prove, that our bio-fields influence our realities. And there are a lot of theories in quantum physics that reflect this, but there are also a lot of hard facts that reflect this. And we can get into more examples later, but I just want to stay on this point. Your bio-field, the field of energy around your body, it is influenced
Starting point is 00:35:05 by how you feel and your emotions influence how you feel. So when you are giving off this energy, this frequency of your future self, I call it the future self frequency, and it's simply the feeling inside of you that emanates all around you of what it feels like to be your future self. For me, it's this beautiful mix of happiness, of bliss, of awe. I love the feeling of awe, just being surprised by life, by the universe, by seeing things come together in ways I never expected. My future self-frequency is full of abundance, of possibility, of unlimited potential. So when I feel this energy inside and around my body, I know that everything that I'm experiencing
Starting point is 00:35:55 is going to be reflecting that. So clarity on who she is and how it feels to be her. And then the second step is becoming. You must act as if you are already there before achieving it. You must go out into the world and be that future self version of you. Don't wait until you have that salary.
Starting point is 00:36:19 Don't wait until you get that bonus or find that husband or get that body, whatever. Just stop waiting. Just be who you want to be in this moment. And that's the thing that will attract it easier than anything else. And I know I'm just coming on this podcast as another personal growth guru, but honestly, if anyone is taking anything away from this conversation, I hope that it is so much more simple than you think. There is so much noise out there and trust me, I've tried everything. What changed my life the
Starting point is 00:36:52 fastest was taking these two steps and simplifying it and then training my mind and my body to be my future self in everyday moments. So the trick to visualization, I believe, is to—and by the way, when I say visualization, I mean visualize it with your body, with your energy and your mind, but it's about a feeling. It's less about a thing you're thinking. So you must visualize with your body in everyday moments being your future self. You don't need to carve out 30 minutes every morning to sit down and do a meditation and then open up your eyes and it's like, okay, I'm back to my old habits and routines because it's such a focused way of doing it. And that's still great and I still think meditation is good for you and I probably should be doing
Starting point is 00:37:40 more meditation, but I'm more in the camp of activation, which is a different approach. It is more for the ambitious and energized woman. Activations are a new type of audio that I've created. And essentially you listen to these motivational, beautiful, cinematic audios in your day-to-day life. So while you're walking the dog, while you're doing your morning walktory to help your circadian rhythm, while you're brushing your teeth, while you're cooking dinner, while you're at the gym.
Starting point is 00:38:11 While I'm packing for a trip. That's my favorite one. Oh, you did that one. That's my favorite one you have. Yeah. A superhuman, you have ones around like if you're on a flight or if you're literally packing for a trip, which I love, and I'll talk more about it in a second. But that was my favorite one because I was about to go to Europe with my partner. And I always before a bigger trip, I like to think about like, OK, what do we want to get out of this trip? I don't want to just like be like, OK, that was three weeks and it went by so fast.
Starting point is 00:38:39 And now I'm back to my everyday life. So it was a really great grounding experience while I'm literally like putting my shirts, putting my swimsuits in the, in my suitcase. I'm like listening and thinking about like, what do I want to take away from this three weeks? Totally. And just like how you'd listen to a podcast or an audio book or just music and activation is just another form of audio that you can choose to listen to
Starting point is 00:39:05 when you're in the mood to feel energetically different. And these activations, there are over 700 of them in the app and they're designed for every single type of moment you can think of. But the beauty in them is that they remind you to be your future self. And we have a team of audio engineers that put together this insane music.
Starting point is 00:39:26 It's like you're the main character of your life when you are listening to an activation. It's that feeling, if I can describe it like, you know when you're in the back of the car and you're on the highway and there's like a song playing in the background and you're looking out the window and you just like feel life
Starting point is 00:39:42 and you feel like you're in that movie and you just feel that like soulful, intimate feeling of just being alive. Bottle that up and that is what an activation feels like. It just reminds you of who you want to be. It reminds you to be her now and it makes you feel these high energy emotions and feelings and frequencies of the life that you desire. So it's a habit-stacking tool, essentially, because you don't even need to carve out new time in your day to create a new habit, like, for example, meditation.
Starting point is 00:40:20 This is one of those things you listen to in the background of your life. And single-handedly activations have been the thing that helped me go from where I was to where I am today. And way before I ever started this company, I was creating my own activations at home on GarageBand. And I would like create dozens of them. And I would use these, you know, visualizations and motivational language. And I'd find this inspiring movie moment,
Starting point is 00:40:47 like music on YouTube, and I'd put it all together and I'd create this like track. And I didn't know at the time, but it was like my first activation that I created at that, in that time. And I would listen to them while walking, our walking activation category is super popular because you feel this like energy to go out and
Starting point is 00:41:05 like move and manifest and create and become and it's a very transformative type of energy so when I created these activations you know I didn't realize what I was doing but then years passed and my life had changed more than any other few years in my whole journey. And I realized I really had something there. So anyway, I released a few to the public and they went wild and viral. So I created an app and that's activations, that's superhuman activations.
Starting point is 00:41:38 Starting a business can feel really, really hard. And growing a business can be even harder. Like how do you talk about your products without feeling salesy? How do you maintain the quality of your products as you scale? And how do you really know you're ready for the next step of your business? Well, there's a great podcast that'll help with that, and it's called This is Small Business. There's a recent episode called From Concept to Reality, Building and Validating Your Business Idea, and it talks all about this. And I know there's so many of our community members who
Starting point is 00:42:04 are stuck in the ideation phase, who want to be business owners, but are trying to figure out how to evaluate their ideas, decide if it's worth pursuing, and figure out what it takes to turn them into a successful business. This is Small Business answers so many of these kinds of questions,
Starting point is 00:42:16 questions all entrepreneurs have. So whether you're dreaming of starting your business, looking to take a part-time side hustle full-time, or maybe you're a few years in and you're ready to grow, this show covers it all. Learn more about how to start and grow your small business. Check out This Is Small Business, an original podcast from Amazon
Starting point is 00:42:30 and your favorite podcast app. And a big thanks to This Is Small Business for sponsoring our show. Can you name every single subscription you have? I can't name mine. I'm out here with so many streaming services and I feel like I am paying for everything. Over 74% of people are like me and have subscriptions they've forgotten about.
Starting point is 00:42:51 With Rocket Money, I don't have to remember every subscription or worry about forgetting any or worrying about canceling some because I can see them all laid out in front of me. Rocket Money is a personal finance app that can help you find and cancel your unwanted subscriptions, monitor your spending, and help lower your bills so you can grow your savings. They give you a clear view of your expenses across your accounts, you can get alerts if bills increase in price, and their new goals feature automatically saves money for you. You know that I love automating your savings. That's like the number one thing I suggest, and I love Rocket Money because it's making it easy. Rocket Money has over 5 million users and have saved a total of 500 million
Starting point is 00:43:26 and cancel subscriptions, saving members up to $740 a year when using all of the apps features. Stop wasting money on things you don't use. Cancel your unwanted subscriptions by going to rocketmoney.com slash ffpod. That's rocketmoney.com slash ffpod, rocketmoney.com slash ffpod. I have so much I want to dissect from what you just said. The first one is that I can hear that we have a couple of skeptics because I just know.
Starting point is 00:43:56 And you're like, this is too woo woo. And I'm going to tell you, I'm going to speak to you. I was not the person who was very woo-woo, especially a couple years ago. And then I started reading more about visualization and realized I've been doing this my entire life. And if you look at any person who inspires you, they, I can almost guarantee you, have done some sort of visualization in their life. If I in any way inspire you, first of all, thank you. Second of all, I believe that a huge part of my success was visualizing what I wanted,
Starting point is 00:44:34 getting to your point very crystal clear about that, and then going and doing it. And what I appreciated too about what you said that I wanna highlight, it's not enough, just like it's not enough to set a goal, it's not enough to just visualize it. It's not enough to just visualize it. It's not enough to, you know, manifest it. It is you visualizing what you want so that you know you can get it.
Starting point is 00:44:54 Then you do have to go get it. It's almost like what we were talking about before of like the feeling of unworthiness or like, I can't do this. Somebody else is more worthy of this than I am. It is convincing yourself and you having the full knowledge that you're worthy because future you has it, you visualize that. However, you still have to go get it, right? And I appreciated the highlight of that
Starting point is 00:45:18 because it's not enough to just think about it. You have to go do it. Yeah, well, Tori, that's the thing. Visualizing is great, but you visualize to change your core self-image. And when you change your core self-image, you naturally do the things that your future self does. So for example, if you are not a runner and you really want to start running, it's going to be very, very hard to just try to use willpower to wake up in the morning and start running. Especially when for me, I'm like a quarter of a mile in and I'm like, I don't want to run anymore. Yeah, I feel you. Listen, honestly,
Starting point is 00:45:53 me too. I'm not really a runner, but I've also it's not something I necessarily want to start doing. I'm more of a Pilates girly. But anyway, I'm just using this example because it's so simple. But you think about it, willpower isn't enough. We've all like hated ourselves and felt shame because we couldn't have willpower in this perfect moment where we wanted to change an old habit. But what we are getting wrong is that, of course we're going to mess up because our self-image hasn't changed. We don't see ourselves as runners. And I think if people just started to tweak the core of the onion, everything that they want to do will just happen more effortlessly. And that is what visualization does.
Starting point is 00:46:27 It helps you rewire your brain and change new thoughts and beliefs to align with your new self-image. And when you change your self-image, you naturally start doing the things that your future self does. So guess what? If you start to believe at the core that you are a runner, you're going to wake up in the morning and feel weird if you don't run. And that is what the trick is.
Starting point is 00:46:48 That is what I want everyone to really understand because it can be easy. It can almost be effortless creating this life. And of course there are going to be very focused and treacherous times. And I've just, I've built a tech company. I know that it's incredibly hard, but you need to become the kind of person that is okay
Starting point is 00:47:07 with that hard. That just embraces it. It's just another Tuesday when something really intense like that happens and manifesting. There are a lot of people that speak about it in a woo-woo way, but my teachings are a lot more pragmatic. I'm not overly woo-woo. All I'm telling you is that your self-image will create your life. And if you have tried things up until now that haven't worked, this is something that you should try. Whether it's doing it yourself, you can create your own audios on your Voice Memos app and just speak about what you want in your future. And there's something that music does that changes your state. Just like how in a movie, you know how they'll use certain music in the background to evoke emotion inside of you.
Starting point is 00:47:49 So listen to music that it invokes that, or you can try activations, and we have a two week free trial, so you can try it completely for free. And you can feel what it feels like to listen to these, but you can do it yourself or not. All I'm saying is that you really need to try this because if you actually do it,
Starting point is 00:48:08 I can assure you that you'll feel a change. And this is something that I wish I had nine years ago. It's this tool in my back pocket of being able to use audio in my everyday life to transform. And we all want more in our lives. Why don't we just start with changing our self-image? That's all I'm going to say. The self-image is the most important and how to change your self-image. Listening to audios in everyday moments, especially visualization audios, because just like the Pavlov dog theory, we've all heard of this theory, you know,
Starting point is 00:48:44 Pavlov rings the bell and the dog salivate because they've been conditioned. This is classical conditioning. We're doing that with ourselves when we're listening to activations on our morning circadian rhythm walk. And soon enough, if you listen to a walking activation every morning on that walk, Tori, you might not even need the activation anymore after a week or two because you've already conditioned yourself to feel unlimited Abundant inspired at the beginning of your day because you're you're creating
Starting point is 00:49:12 These new thoughts and beliefs and tying that to everyday actions. It's the biggest life hack and I just feel so passionate talking about it because it's almost easy to do talking about it because it's almost easy to do. Yeah. No, and I think one thing I've been thinking a lot about and we've started talking about on the show is the diet that we feed ourselves. And I don't mean, I mean, I guess I mean physically, but really what I'm talking about is like, what are you consuming?
Starting point is 00:49:41 If you are unhappy with your life, if you want to be a business owner, listen to business podcasts, listen to superhuman activations that talk about becoming the highest version of yourself, listen to audiobooks, read books, surround yourself with people who are business owners or who are doing the things that you want to do. I think again, someone listening is dissatisfied, especially in a particular area of your life. Do like a diet audit. Like what are you consuming?
Starting point is 00:50:07 Do those things actually make you feel better? Now we're gonna have Trashy TV. I'm in the middle of the perfect couple right now on Netflix, I don't know if you've heard of this. It's Trashy as hell and I love it. It's like Nicole Kidman. I'm needing a new reality. It's fun, it's murder mystery.
Starting point is 00:50:21 It's murder mystery, it's very fun. It's my favorite shit, which is just like, this isn't fantastic TV, but Nicole Kimman looks great in it. You know, like that's great. That is my like, turn off my brain. But if I do want to be inspired, that's not what I'm watching.
Starting point is 00:50:37 If I do want to be, you know, motivated to do this project at work, that's not what I'm consuming. And so maybe can we talk about how our diet is so important and how we can get more of the things that do inspire us incorporated into our lives? This is so good. And something I struggle with still, you know, my fiance at night will want to watch TV. And I'm like, okay, some nights, of course,
Starting point is 00:51:06 I'm happy to do that, but I don't want this to be something I do every single night because it doesn't make me feel that good. I would rather, you know, read a book or even if it's a fiction book before bed and just do something. No, I do the same thing. My partner wants to watch TV and sometimes I do.
Starting point is 00:51:22 And sometimes I will have watched TV and I'm like, I would have rather read a book. I feel better sometimes when I read a book before bed as opposed to watching something. Yeah. Yeah. I also think like technology and this is why I like audio so much.
Starting point is 00:51:36 And I've always been an avid podcast listener. It's interesting that I created an audio app. Like I love audio because your eyes aren't glued to a screen and there's really something I can't pinpoint what it is, but tell me if you feel the same. So much technology everywhere these days, it almost feels like mind numbing. I feel numb. And I like feeling alive. And I feel like numb is the opposite of alive. And I want to do things that make me feel alive more, whether that's going outside and being in nature and having a beautiful deep conversation or reading a book and romanticizing the moment or listening to an activation or
Starting point is 00:52:10 traveling and doing things that make me feel alive and listening to things that make me feel alive rather than doing things that make me feel numb and things that make you feel numb is over consumption, whether that's alcohol or drugs or even overeating. I remember when I had an eating disorder, I'd binge eat a lot and that was something that made me feel numb. Yeah. The mindless TikTok score. Yeah. Disassociated state. And I just, the more numbing, I've realized the more numbing things that we do, the less alive that we feel. So I agree with you, Tori, what we consume, it's everything.
Starting point is 00:52:47 And everyone says it, but at the end of the day, you know, do you want to live like the quote average person? And unfortunately in today's world, average is unhappy, depressed, like just not fulfilled. And I wish our average was different. But if we're looking at our average and we're looking at what everyone does in their day to day life, it's like there's a connection there. So to be different, to feel different, to feel outside of average and to experience an un-average life, we must be doing things that
Starting point is 00:53:17 the average person does not do. And hopefully that will change the average one day if more of us do that. So that's just how I think about the whole consumption piece. Well, and one of my favorite things to just shamelessly plug what you do, one of my favorite things about superhuman is like, I often need some sort of stimulation, like especially when I'm doing chores. So I will click play on a podcast or listen to an audio book and those are great, but sometimes I don't want to like actively participate.
Starting point is 00:53:48 If that makes sense. Like I don't want to like massively. You don't want to learn. I don't want to actively listen. I'm like, I listen to a lot of politics podcasts. I'm like, I don't, I've listened to my four hours today. I can't hear Donald Trump's voice anymore. I got to turn that off.
Starting point is 00:54:02 No, I hate watching the news. I know it's like, no, it's just such a low vibe thing. Of course it's good to be like aware of what's voice anymore. I gotta turn that off. No, I hate watching the news. I know it's like, no, it's just such a low vibe thing. Of course it's good to be like aware of what's going on. It's so hard. I know, I'm trying to stay informed and I'm sure, yeah, it's a whole thing. Yeah, stay informed, but you don't need four hours a day to worry.
Starting point is 00:54:16 I know, I'm being a little hyperbolic, but. So one of the things I've loved though is while I'm doing chores or while I'm on my walk or while I'm in the shower, or yeah, while I'm doing chores or while I'm on my walk or while I'm in the shower or yeah while I'm packing my bag I can listen to something that does have a bit of the things I already love. It has the music, it has you know the the audio from you and it's so funny hearing your voice and I love it because I hear your voice in my ears all the time already. So like I feel like that is the great thing
Starting point is 00:54:46 where it does feel like I'm doing something good for myself, but it's not an active thing. Like it's a part of my everyday life. It's like on top of something I'm already doing as opposed to, okay, I have to sit down and add this whole other thing to my routine. And I really appreciate that. And it's also, again, it makes me feel like
Starting point is 00:55:10 I'm doing something good for myself, but I don't have to be like this active participant in that moment. Well, Tori, I just want to say thank you so much. I'm so grateful that you love the app. And I love talking to people that use it because just like you said there, and I really like what you said about it not needing to be this like big thing, because we're all so busy,
Starting point is 00:55:32 we're all so consumed with our own lives and what this is just another wellness thing to add to our full stack of things we need to do and it's overwhelming. I don't want this to be that. And thankfully, it's not that. It's just one of those little things that you can do To make you feel different in your day. That's simply what it is I was searching like travel on a trip and it was like, oh, there's one and then I was searching like driving Roadtrip and boom. There's one too. Like that was my other favorite thing is that there were categories for every single thing I was, I was encountering in my life where I'm like, Oh, I would like a little bit of stimulation and a moment where I do feel like I'm
Starting point is 00:56:12 doing something good for myself, but I don't have to be fully present. I don't have to like opt into listening to this thing. Exactly. And your subconscious is listening, no matter what you're doing. We were talking before about the focus on self-development and how I do believe that, again, so much of, it sounds like both of our success can be attributed to that. I do feel like there is a certain level where too much of a good thing can be too much. Like you were talking about, yes, we want to grow. Yes, we want to develop as people, but we also can't hate ourselves now
Starting point is 00:56:52 and we can't be mad at where we're at now. So is there such a thing as too much visualization or too much self-development? And that being said, like how important is consistency when it comes to all of this? That is such a great question. And definitely in my past, when I was younger, I hated myself already. So getting into this work, I wasn't going to love myself now and do this work.
Starting point is 00:57:17 But as the years passed, I learned that when I use activations and visualization, I'm not living in this future reality. I am living in this current reality, feeling the emotions that I desire to feel. When I feel abundant in this moment right now, and let's just say, because money is an easy example, it's a number, let's just say I wanted to be earning a million dollars a month, but right now maybe it's two or three hundred thousand. It's not that I'm feeling lack because I'm not at a million. It's that I'm feeling abundance in general. And that's it. And I can feel it now.
Starting point is 00:57:52 I can feel it if I was making a thousand dollars a month and I wanted to start making ten thousand dollars a month. But it's just feeling abundant and it's an energy and it's a feeling. So to be honest with you, yes, I believe there is too much self-help and personal development if you're coming from a place of hating yourself, but for me it was this incredible, incredible journey to self-love. It helped me love my life now. It helped me love myself. So I would say that it's simply the act of changing how you feel, from unhappy, victim mentality, hating your life,
Starting point is 00:58:29 to happy, confident, loving your life, abundant mentality. And if you had the two options in every moment, which one would you choose? Yeah, I think just like anything else, we can become obsessed with it. We can become obsessed with optimizing every single version of our life. And again, one of the things I appreciate about your work is it's not about that. We still have things that we love to do.
Starting point is 00:58:53 We can still watch our trashy TV if we want to watch our trashy TV, because that does have benefits. I think it's just a balance, just like anything else. You going zero to 60 and deciding, yeah, I'm going to save a million dollars when you don't even make a million dollars, that's not feasible, right? We're not asking you to set goals that are unachievable and then beat yourself up when you don't.
Starting point is 00:59:16 I think it's like a mix of going so hard and then realizing that that's not sustainable. And then also the shame that comes with all of this, the shame that, oh, we're not where we want to be, or the shame of we're in this state that we're not excited about our lives. The shame is everything. We talk about shame a lot in the show. And it's like that, I think that's coupled with a lot of your advice is like, if there's one thing I want to get women to do, it's not feel shame, like not feel a shame that you're not further along in your career. Stop feeling shame about your net worth.
Starting point is 00:59:52 Stop feeling shame about just where you're at in life in general. You know what, Tori, that's such an important topic. I feel like us women, we deal with shame way more than men. And I don't know why that is. We're so hard on ourselves patriarchy I guess so no literally it's patriarchy like I did the research for my book where The shame that men feel is is much more minor than the shame women feel men feel shame about choices Women feel shame about who we are as people if that makes sense
Starting point is 01:00:23 Yeah, like men feel ashamed of like, oh, I fucked up. That was a weird thing to say to that person versus women go, I said that weird thing to somebody. I'm such a bad friend. Right? It's an identity thing for women in a way that it isn't for men. Men are just like, I feel shame because I said a shitty thing. It's a self-image thing.
Starting point is 01:00:42 Yeah. I ate the cookie, so I'm a shitty thing. It's a self image thing. Yeah, I ate the cookie. So I'm a bad person. I can't save money. So I'm not good at money, right? It's not just like no one taught me, or I made a bad financial decision once. It's like, I fucked up. So I'm fucked up. And it's very interesting. And even if we put all the work into ourselves, like I definitely still deal with shame and it's so crazy because I've done so much work on myself and I really feel like it's just this constant practice of waking up every morning and choosing to be okay with not being perfect and I don't know about you
Starting point is 01:01:19 but I've definitely dealt with perfectionism a lot of my life and that's why when I had that unlock that I mentioned earlier about, it's not about perfection, it's about how quickly you can bounce back and how I've never had this one perfect day. I've never heard some big successful person talk about how they're not perfect. Like everyone likes to put this act on that they're all perfect. And the truth is that there's not one person that's ever had a perfect, perfect day. Everyone feels this shame and everyone feels this not good enough feeling, whether they're the most successful and famous and prettiest and whatever. Everyone feels this way. So I think just normalizing that.
Starting point is 01:01:59 These days in interviews when I talk about, oh look at this life I've created, I always feel this urge now to say, but listen, I also still deal with a lot internally. It's a lot better than it used to be, but I'm very much so still just a girl and I'm still just dealing with, you know, hormone imbalances at a certain part of the month where I'm feeling extremely self-conscious and shameful that I didn't do this thing or doubting what direction I should take my company or looking in the mirror and not really liking how I looked that day. Although I've done so much work on myself and most of the time I'm feeling positive
Starting point is 01:02:37 and happy in my life, it's never going to be perfect. What we need to do is deal with that and understand with full grace towards ourselves that that's okay. It's okay to not be perfect. It's okay to not be in this space of just ultimates and understand that when you get to where you wanna be, you're still going to be needing to do that work every day on your self-love and on you and the most
Starting point is 01:03:06 successful, happiest, gorgeous role models that we all look up to. They do not feel this way all of the time either. So we need to find peace knowing that we're all cut from the same cloth and we're all just women doing our best. And I love that you talk about this, Tory, because it's something And I love that you talk about this, Tori, because it's something very close to me at this time in my life. If you're trying to start a business, you need a website. That was actually the first investment I ever made in her first 100K was buying a domain, getting a website, making sure that people could actually find me and my services. And we chose Squarespace.
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Starting point is 01:04:19 to launch, go to squarespace.com slash ffpod to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. You know me, I love thrive cosmetics. You all are in my comments and in my DMs asking me what my lipstick shade is. It's thrive cosmetics. The lipstick I wear all the time that is giving very like fall burgundy color, but I wear it year round, it's thrive cosmetics. And it doesn't leave. It's a lip stain. So when I eat,
Starting point is 01:04:47 when I drink, I still have the stain on my lips. It's not going anywhere. I also pair it with my new favorite mascara from them, which is their liquid lash extensions. It's like a tube mascara. So it doesn't rub off. It just like schlefs off, if that makes sense. And it's like, I can't believe I lived without it. Truly. It's my new favorite thing in my makeup routine. Brighten up your fall look with Thrive Cosmetics Luxury Beauty that gives back. Right now you can get an exclusive 20% off your first order at thrivecosmetics.com slash ffpod. That's Thrive Cosmetics, C-A-U-S-E-M-E-T-I-C-S dot com slash FF pod for 20% off your first order. I have to round back with you because we talked about bounce back rate and then I realized we never went back. So tell me what that is and tell me how that works in our lives.
Starting point is 01:05:41 Yeah. So it's kind of just this random thing I came up with like eight years ago, honestly, when my first business was that online magazine and I wrote about personal development as part of it. And I created this term called the bounce back rate. And I realized that I would fall off the bandwagon a lot, especially at the beginning. And I still do to this day, we all do, we're human like we were saying.
Starting point is 01:06:03 I'd fall off the bandwagon, whether it was me trying to be eating healthier or me trying to not procrastinate as much. All these things that I felt that I needed to do when I would fall off track, I started to realize it was less about trying to be perfect and staying on track, but it was more about how long it takes for you to bounce back on track after you've fallen off, if that makes sense. So it's less about being perfect, and it's more about your bounce back rate. The difference between someone that is unhappy and unsuccessful in their life and someone who is happy and successful in their life that has created a lot is their bounce back rate. So when I first started, my bounce back rate was literally months. Like I would fall off track on something I wanted to do
Starting point is 01:06:48 and it would take me months to try again. And now it's on average a few minutes, probably maybe an hour. And I've realized that very happy and abundant people have a very, very quick bounce back rate. If they mess up or they fall off the bandwagon, they get right back on. They don't wait years or months or weeks or even days, the very successful ones, they just get right back on.
Starting point is 01:07:16 If they mess up or they slip up or they fall off, they just, they realize it's all about getting back on. They don't fester over how they fell off. They don't fester over how they failed. They just get getting back on. They don't fester over how they fell off. They don't fester over how they failed. They just get right back on. They take action. And I've realized that with everything in life, from business, money, to health and beyond, it's all about your bounce back rate.
Starting point is 01:07:40 It's not about perfection. So this is something that I use a lot in the book that I'm writing. It's coming out with Hey House in the spring. It's called Activate Your Future Self. And it's kind of all about my teachings and how I developed activations. And the first part is called clarity. The second part is called becoming, like my two-step formula. And the third part is about maintaining and maintaining this new future self, self image.
Starting point is 01:08:04 One of the biggest tricks in there is your bounce back rate. And it talks about how you can strengthen your bounce back rate, but really at the end of the day, it's all about the self-image work. And if you are listening to an activation that talks about this specific thing, you're more likely to see it with your RIS when it pops up next time. And it's really just this new construction of how you think that you need to develop. So that's a bit more about the bounce back rate. And I just find that it gives you a bit more peace in knowing that it's not about how many times you fall off.
Starting point is 01:08:35 It's about how quickly you get back on. I just want to echo how smart that is. I have literally as we're recording this, I'm in a reading rut. I'm a really good reader. I love it. And I just haven't found a book in the past couple of weeks. I also left the one I was reading somewhere so I have to go pick it up.
Starting point is 01:08:52 It's a library book so I gotta go get it. And I have just been having this feeling of like, oh gosh, I gotta get back into reading. And I think to echo the bounce back rate, I think it's so important, I think you're exactly right. I will also couple it with, speaking of shame, try to bounce back without shame. So what I could be doing right now is going,
Starting point is 01:09:12 what the fuck are you doing? Like you're a reader, why aren't you reading? You know you're happier when you read, right? And like that self talk could be really, really negative. But instead I've gotten to a point where I've trained myself to be as neutral as possible, which is just like, hey, Tor, you haven't read in a while. You like reading.
Starting point is 01:09:29 Let's get back into it. And talking to myself like I'm a friend or like I'm a nice mom to myself. I'm just like, hey, Tor, you like reading, you haven't done it in a while, get back to it. Same thing with fitness or money. You made a mindless purchase rather than going, again, I'm so bad with money. I'm so fucked. This is all, it's all over. And then just deciding you're
Starting point is 01:09:50 going to go rogue and spend all of your money. Like it can just be a, Hey, that wasn't my best choice in the world, but I'm going to get back to it because I know this is important to me. Because I see this, especially with money. Totally. And shame is a blocker. Yes. Yeah. Shame is a blocker. Yes. Yeah. Shame is a blocker for your bounce back rate, actually. So when you're feeling shame, you get into this fight or flight response and you don't want to take action. So bouncing back actually, it takes you out of that shame spiral, which is such an important
Starting point is 01:10:17 thing. So I completely agree with you. Yeah. And I think with money, I see it a lot where it's like, I'm already $10,000 in credit card debt, so it's another 2000 more. And I'm like, I'm already $10,000 in credit card debt, so it's another 2,000 more. And I'm like, it's another $2,000 of credit card debt. Like, it's not, oh, all hope is lost. So same, I mean, New Year's resolutions, right?
Starting point is 01:10:33 This happens every year. Okay, I set goals and by week two, I abandoned them because I didn't go to the gym seven times a week. And usually it's again, a combination of like, you setting unachievable goals but also not making a plan to achieve them and then being like, okay well, I'll just wait until January 1st next year to set goals again. And I'm like you can set goals on any day of the week. You can set goals on a Tuesday the 22nd.
Starting point is 01:10:56 Like it does not matter. So I think that I love the bounce back rate. Honestly, you're so right and I talk about that in the book too. It's like, us humans, we have a penchant for a clean, fresh start. We want to wait until the Monday. We love it when a Monday falls on the first of a month. Like we love a New Year's and I'm like that too. I definitely noticed that I'm more motivated. There's data behind that. We love it. But like, okay, create that for yourself. Okay, it's not the first of the month Okay, wait until Monday if that really is gonna motivate you but like no start now use it to actually motivate you Like that is you need to realize that the version this is what I believe the version of you Your future self the version of you that you want to be, that person is more you than who you are today.
Starting point is 01:11:47 This is what I believe. When I created my dream life, it was more about unbecoming the layers of what I was not. I feel like now I've uncovered the truest me and I feel like there are a lot of qualities that I have that are very similar to when I was, you know, six, seven years old, bright-eyed, looking at the world before I got tainted by how I was supposed to look or what I was supposed to like and how I was supposed to act. And I feel like this work is truly more about unbecoming than it is about becoming something different. And I think when you shift that in your mind that, oh, my future self or my best self or
Starting point is 01:12:23 my favorite self or my higher self, whatever you want to call it, is actually the truest version of me. It makes it feel more within reach and it makes it more attainable to just embody in everyday moments. I think that's the perfect way to end it. I so appreciate you being here. Plug away, my friend. Where can people find out more about you? Where can people get superhuman? Go for it. Absolutely. Well, thank you so much, Tori. If you guys want to try the two-week free trial and get a very generous discount through Tori's link, you can only sign up with the
Starting point is 01:12:58 big discount on the website. So go to activations.com slash FF pod. I'm sure it will be in the show notes. If you go to the website to sign up, that's the only way you can get the discount because the app store doesn't really allow us to give discounts. So go to the website, check it out. You can learn more. Just take advantage of the two week free trial. Trust me, money back guarantee, no questions asked. You do not need to stay subscribed to this. Try it out and if you like it, you can continue listening. And if you don't, then try to create your own voice memos on your phone. Just try to utilize audio in your everyday moments. Like this is the biggest takeaway is using visualization and specific cinematic music
Starting point is 01:13:40 weaved into your everyday life. That is the key. This is what will transform you if you have tried life, that is the key. This is what will transform you if you have tried many things that haven't stuck. This is the type of thing that you look forward to doing every day. It's not hard to do, it's easy and it will change you quickly if you actually stay consistent.
Starting point is 01:13:57 So that's what I'll say about activations. For me, I've seen synchronicities that have just blown me away with this work. My first $100,000 month was by doing a specific activation every single day, the month prior, I swear to God. And this work truly changes lives. So please go try it out. I'm not really on Instagram right now, but if you want to follow me, my account is at
Starting point is 01:14:21 Mimi Bouchard. I'm kind of taking a social media break at the moment. But really, activations is where you're going to find most of me. And yeah, I'm so grateful, Tori, for being on your show. I really hope that this message came across and people feel inspired to change their life, whether it's their finances or just generally loving their life, going from a life that feels okay to a life that feels amazing. It's possible for every single one of us. And I just, I'm so thankful to be on your show. So thank you. Thanks for coming on. We love to see it.
Starting point is 01:14:57 Thank you so much to Mimi for joining us. You can go to activations.com slash FF pod to try it out for two weeks. I would love to hear what your favorite one is. I am doing a lot of walking activations right now as well as trying to replace my office listening addiction in the shower with activations instead. Laundry is especially a good time that I do. When I'm folding laundry, it's activation time. It's perfect. All right, Financial Feminist, we appreciate you being here.
Starting point is 01:15:22 Thank you for subscribing. Thank you for supporting the show. Thank you for telling your friends and And I'll text you later. Okay, bye. Thank you for listening to Financial Feminist, a Her First 100k podcast. Financial Feminist is hosted by me, Tori Dunlap, produced by Kristin Fields and Tamesha Grant. Research by Sarah Shortino. Audio and video engineering by Alyssa Medcalf.
Starting point is 01:15:43 Marketing and operations by Karina Patel and Amanda Lafue. Special thanks to our team at Her First 100K. Kaylyn Sprinkle, Masha Bakhmageva, Taylor Chil, Sasha Bonar, Ray Wong, Elizabeth McCumber, Claire Karonen, Darrell Ann Ingman, and Megan Walker. Promotional graphics by Mary Stratton, photography by Sarah Wolf, and theme music by Jonah Cohen Sound. A huge thanks to the entire Her First 100K community for supporting the show. For more information about Financial Feminist, Her First 100K, our guests, and episode show notes, visit financialfeministpodcast.com. If you're confused about your personal finances and you're wondering where to start, go to herfirst100k.com slash quiz for a free personalized money plan.

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