Fine Dining - CheeseGate at Chevys Fresh Mex

Episode Date: February 15, 2023

Michael & Garrett go all the way to south San Francisco just to eat at Chevys Fresh Mex Y'all ready for shits? CheeseGate sets Michael and Garrett off as their server cheeselights them The boys passi...onately debate the merits of Performance Enhancing Dessert-toppers Pierce reviews the Chevys kids menu in this week's Munchkin Menu Musings JUB sells you the Art of Denial We're now on Patreon! Get a monthly free episode, merch discounts, download access to our music including the 7 singles from our Olive Garden musical, the opportunity to get your face immortalized on the Tchotchke of Mediocrity, and more!   Get our 5 Survival Tips for Casual Dining at www.finediningpodcast.com!   Send us your Chevys stories at finediningpodcast@gmail.com.   Follow us on TikTok and Instagram @finediningpodcast   Let us know where we should go next by leaving us a review on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Google, or wherever you get your podcasts. We read every one!   Next time on Fine Dining: A Special Look Back at 20 Entries on the Tchotchke of Mediocrity! And in 2 weeks: The Cheesecake Factory. If you have ever worked for The Cheesecake Factory and have a story to share, or if you’d like us to hear your child’s review of The Cheesecake Factory kids menu, send it to finediningpodcast@gmail.com.

Transcript
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Starting point is 00:00:00 Hello, and welcome back to the Fine Dining Podcast. That's fine as in, you know, it's fine. It's okay. You know, it's average, not like finer dining. So you know what we're doing, we're looking for the most mediocre restaurant in America. The perfect 5.00 out of 10. And you know, where are we gonna find that? Probably at a chain restaurant.
Starting point is 00:00:22 Probably that, I think that's logical. And so this conclusion has led us to go to all of the chain restaurants that you grew up knowing and loving that we grew up knowing and loving. So we are traveling the country, hitting up your local Applebee's. Yeah, your local Olive Garden, Chili's. Cheddar's. Ugh. Cheddar's.
Starting point is 00:00:41 Oh, Cheddar's like, I think my body chemistry is still slightly more greasy after that experience. Your pH has risen. I'm your host, Michael Ornelis. And I'm your host, Garrett's Work. And we're looking for that perfect 5.00 out of 10, the most average to give you a measuring stick that you can use to be the standard of mediocrity. We're trying to create the mediocrity scale so that way we could, and we'll name it after whatever restaurant wins this prestigious award.
Starting point is 00:01:10 Is it the Chili's scale? The Chili's test. You know, right now it's currently the Waffle House test. There's a Waffle House index. Now there's a Waffle House test because Waffle House currently is the standard bearer of mediocrity sitting at a 5.06 out of 10. Wow. The worst than Waffle House, other than those .06 away that they could be, is an objectively
Starting point is 00:01:33 bad restaurant. Anything better than Waffle House is an objectively good restaurant. And you know what? They'll fight you for that honor. That is the final test. If you get a 5.00 rating, you then have to have a knife fight with Waffle House. And you're going to lose. And you'll probably lose.
Starting point is 00:01:50 But at least I'll catch it on a Waffle House branded security camera. We're evaluating these restaurants based on their atmosphere, based on their service, and of course, obviously based on the food. It's got to be based on the food because they're restaurants. What else are we doing there if not eating? We're annoying the waitstaff and probably the patrons. Well, we're doing a lot other than eating, but eating is always, always a part of it. This week, we're on the road again.
Starting point is 00:02:16 We went back up to the Bay Area because a restaurant we wanted to do, we found out that there wasn't one within like 300 miles of us. We've become those obnoxious LA people that go up to the Bay Area every weekend. We went to Chevy's, Chevy's, whatever you want to call it. Chevy's. Chevy's Fresh Mex is what it's called. It's fresh. They make everything in-house daily.
Starting point is 00:02:41 And the quarter Mexican in me relates deeply to any Mexican restaurant, but there are so few that are actual national chains. So I wanted to take this opportunity to go by there again. We had done Chewie's before. Hold up. Did you guys ever think you'd be hearing two men complaining about the lack of national Mexican chains while living in Los Angeles where there's such good, authentic Mexican food?
Starting point is 00:03:04 Yeah. But I mean, we're doing it for content, baby. Exactly. Yeah. We're doing it for content. Chevy's or Chevy's, however we want to pronounce it, Chevy's. Yeah. Let's just say Chevy's for the rest.
Starting point is 00:03:14 There's no apostrophe. Yeah. There's no apostrophe in it. So yeah. Chevy's Fresh Mex. But while we're up in the Bay Area, we decided to put together a little touristy video, kind of hit some of the spots like the Golden Gate Bridge, Fisherman's Wharf, Lombard Street. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:03:30 We drove down that. That was terrifying. And when we were going through Fisherman's Wharf, we passed a hot sauce store and it immediately caught my eye because I like a despice. I like a despice. You like a despice. I like a duh spice. And we stopped there because there was a parking spot right there and I was like, great.
Starting point is 00:03:51 Let's go in. Let's try some hot sauces. Let's... I wanted to buy some. They had like a buy three, get one deal going on. It's funny. We're actually running low on hot sauce from our Austin trip. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:04:02 And I bought so many. I bought a lot. But the thing that became the most noteworthy part about this little shop, they had a hot sauce that was so spicy, we had to sign a waiver. This hot sauce is called the end flat line hot sauce. Yeah. Flat line. As in, you know, your heart rate stops death.
Starting point is 00:04:25 It's not named after something that has any chill. My knees were shaking. This hot sauce. I don't know if any of you guys are familiar with the Scoville scale, but it is how you measure the heat unit of a pepper. The higher the number basically means the more sugar water you need to dilute the pepper in for it to neutralize the spice. It's an imperfect scale, but it it's there in there here.
Starting point is 00:04:49 And just for a common reference, a jalapeno is like 2,500. Yes. Right here. It says a jalapeno is 2,000 to 8,000 Scoville heat units. Yeah. And a habanero, I believe is in like the 300,000 range, a ghost pepper, typically around a million. I've eaten a raw ghost pepper before and it was a lot. I've done, you know, the hot ones line up before the last hot ones, the last dab.
Starting point is 00:05:12 Yeah. I believe is around 2.2 million at its hottest. They've got a new one out, the Apollo's 2.5 million now. So the flat line, the end, the one that we tasted, it is made with a pepper extract that is in the 7 million Scoville unit range and then it has peppers that range between one to two and a half. Yeah. So we're guessing.
Starting point is 00:05:37 Probably around 5 million. Maybe. It felt like that. It changed us. And then not long after we had Mexican food, we arrived at Chevy's and so it impacted your experience more than mine. We pull in, my heartburn is starting up now, like, and you had your hot sauce maybe 10-15 minutes before me.
Starting point is 00:05:56 So I was experiencing all the same symptoms you did. But I'm a delay. But in delay, you got to watch what would happen to you and then like, like I was the movie trailer and then you got to experience the actual main feature. That was the most terrible movie trailer I have ever seen. Yeah. As tears are streaming down my face, that's what you're like, oh cool, that's what I have to look forward to.
Starting point is 00:06:19 And you can see this little spice adventure. We took videos of it. It's on our social media. So go follow us on our social media. That's right. We're on Instagram at Find Dining Podcast. We're on TikTok at Find Dining Podcast and you can email us whatever you want, find dining podcast at gmail.com.
Starting point is 00:06:37 We might regret that, but I don't know, maybe we won't. We also now have Patreon, exclusive episodes once every month. We're doing some really fun stuff for it. We're trying out new segments that might make it into the real show and you get to hear it first and leave your feedback on if you like those segments. Because the point, like, we want to have an interactive experience with you. Yeah. And Patreon's the closest way we can do this right now.
Starting point is 00:07:01 Yes. So go over, subscribe to us on Patreon. We will definitely give you your dollars worth. Stay tuned. Tell some more people because once we get enough people on Patreon, we might offer up an opportunity for a subscriber to have a meal with us. That would be a lot of fun. Find dining party of two.
Starting point is 00:07:19 And much like our table, we'll be ready with them, I think right now, our table's ready. Yes. Your table is ready. Follow me. Have you tried our chicken breast? Serving pancakes and ribs. I recommend the spaghetti. We're here to satisfy, not to impress.
Starting point is 00:07:37 Your table is ready. Complimentary butter and bread. These walls have growth signs. Knit, knack, cowboy hat, good luck hat. Altograph guitar, some crap from your city. Behold the trash key of mediocrity. Find dining. Just find dining.
Starting point is 00:07:54 Two ledgers on the sign are shining. Neon flickering, irregular timing. Identify the perfect vibe. Palatine. Find dining. Find dining. First impressions. I immediately start seeing those little, like, aluminum sculptures.
Starting point is 00:08:21 I know there was one of a donkey, some, like, cacti. It was a really bright almost. It felt like New Mexico, 80s style. I got a lot of Austin out of it, but I'm from Austin, so that's where I encountered it more. It was very much like that. It looked like the outside of Chewie's when we went there. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Same vibe.
Starting point is 00:08:39 It's kind of like the bright, yeah, it's very Mexican in nature. Just very bright reds, yellows, greens, blues. I noticed the neon sign for Chevy's is, it's completely lit up. But for some reason, the why is very lit up. And it just feels like it's asking us a philosophical question like, why would you drive up to San Francisco just to eat here? A valid question. It is.
Starting point is 00:09:03 A valid question. The answer is this was the closest one to us guys. This was the closest one. Then we decided to walk in the doors and I'm immediately blown away at the authenticity. The hosts are speaking to each other in Spanish. And I'm just like, you know, for a chain restaurant, this feels authentic. Doesn't mean it is, but there's what? I'm just looking at you for commenting on the basically experience you have going out
Starting point is 00:09:33 to most restaurants in Southern California. Yeah, but you don't expect it at a chain restaurant. Also Chinese buffets. Yeah, I will give you that. So they continued this really bright red turquoise color scheme throughout the entire building. And yeah, and there was like a big, like almost like a fence, like a picket fence, but uneven in a lot of ways. But it's what their wall was made of, or at least this big centerpiece wall that I think
Starting point is 00:09:57 blocked the view of the kitchen from the entryway. And I thought it was actually a pretty cool design. It was almost like a stained aged wood. Yeah. It's like white blues, some reds, I think. Yeah, there was a big neon fresh mechs sign. I know that they had some signs of different beers. There was like a very large brushed copper sun.
Starting point is 00:10:17 Yeah, that was really cool. And he was like smiling. I was like, oh, he's in a good mood to see me. Yeah, he's in a good mood. My stomach's not. Rhinestone light fixtures. Those are cool. Yeah, like they're hanging down from the ceiling and they've got like a tin lampshade
Starting point is 00:10:32 over them basically. It's like they have someone bedazzle all the time. Yeah. And I was just like, who's bedazzling the lampshades? Like why are they doing? I don't know. That sounds like I don't like it. I actually, I did like the aesthetic.
Starting point is 00:10:46 But yeah, I mean, other than that, I wouldn't say there was a lot of note. I'll say this, it felt more like I was inside of an authentic Mexican joint than a chain. There was actually one thing that was a little weird. There was a really large oven range vent over top of some tables because they used to have a machine in that very spot. How do you know that? Oh, do you know some things about the restaurant? I might have some rusty facts.
Starting point is 00:11:15 Have you rounded them up? I may have. Well, let's get into it. All right, Garrett, what have you rounded up this week? Okay, Michael, Chevy's was founded in 1986 and none other than... I'm bad at the guessing game at this point. I'm going to say San Francisco. Actually, yeah, you are very close.
Starting point is 00:11:39 That was only a guess of like, well, whatever is where we were. It was founded in Alameda. Okay. Which is San Francisco technically. There are currently 22 locations in nine states. Okay. And that is down from a... That's respectively national.
Starting point is 00:11:55 Yeah, it used to be 40. And you said they're down to what? 22. Are they all West Coast or are they kind of spread out? They are all over. Like there is a Maryland, Virginia. I think there's some one of the Dakotas. Missouri.
Starting point is 00:12:07 That's really spread out in a weird way. Cool. Chevy's used to feature an automatic tortilla making contraption named El Machino. So it was described by a San Francisco Chronicle food critic as a Rube Goldberg-esque tortilla machine. That's amazing. It was. This was like the draw to Chevy's fresh mechs for a while.
Starting point is 00:12:31 They became known for this. That's so cool. It is. An employee fed dough balls into the top of the machine, which proceeded to automatically flatten them and then cook them on three rotating baking trays. After it gets through the baking trays, it flips the finished tortilla onto a cooling rack, which takes it over to the serving station. And would it like load it up and people would go by and take tortillas from there?
Starting point is 00:12:57 Yes. And then an employee takes the tortilla and boom, there's your fresh tortilla. That's fun. Yeah, that feels like the opening of Flubber when Robin Williams is like, is that the right movie? There's like a Robin Williams movie where there's a Rube Goldberg breakfast making machine at the beginning. Yeah, that is Flubber.
Starting point is 00:13:17 Is that Flubber? Okay. And Chevy's fresh mechs had that in their grasp. What happened, Garrett? I don't know if this was part of it, but as it turns out, you don't always want to sit next to the machine. I found this review online. TripAdvisor says, do not sit by El Machino.
Starting point is 00:13:36 There are so many people, staff and customers passing by coming and going, literally running past. It's like being in Grand Central Station and very distracting, not to mention that spills occur. That's a hazard of the trade. I feel like everyone knows that when you go to a place like, yeah, there are going to be some spots that are busier. I thought you were getting into like, there are accidents that happen territory.
Starting point is 00:14:00 Like not like spills, but like like the oil from the tortilla like splash zone burns people. So you were wondering whatever happened to this thing. So in 2005, the chain was bought out for a second time and locations started quietly replacing El Machino with a more traditional and less spanglishy tortilla press, which was sad. R.I.P. El Machino. Yeah, you can still find them on Facebook.
Starting point is 00:14:28 I would love to buy one of these machines. Oh, like you can find them on Facebook Marketplace. You can buy them. They still exist. Okay. The first time this company was sold, it was in 1993 and it was purchased then by Taco Bell. Okay.
Starting point is 00:14:43 Not expected. The quality of food is much better. Yeah. Hmm. You know how there's like a Pizza Hut bistro? Do you know about Pizza Hut Italian Bistro? Yes. I wonder if there were plans to like turn it into like a Taco Bell equivalent of, I mean,
Starting point is 00:14:57 but they do have that. They have a Taco Bell. There's like a Taco Bell bistro. They serve alcohol. There's like one or two locations like that. I don't know if they're still open, but I remember headlines about those popping up. Interesting. And that's it for today.
Starting point is 00:15:10 Good job, Garrett. Sounds like all the facts have been rounded up successfully. Thanks. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Atmosphere. Okay, Garrett, I need to address the elefante in the room.
Starting point is 00:15:28 What's that? We were seated by ourselves. Like I feel like there was a section that was filled with people having fun. There was a birthday in there. Yeah. There was an entire room. They were having a blast. And then they see us and they're just like, nah fam.
Starting point is 00:15:45 I feel like this happens to us a lot. Yeah. It seemed like they were like, these two, there wasn't even a you must bowl. Like we weren't doing anything silly or foolish or anything like that. Those of you who are first time listeners, the you must bowl is something we draw out of. And it gives us punishments if we pick places that aren't mediocre enough that we have to do at the next week's restaurant.
Starting point is 00:16:09 Past ones include Garrett having to inflate a flamingo inner tube at a rainforest cafe. And Michael had to make his own pineapple son complete with mutton chops for the old spaghetti factory. And interact with it as though it were real, made me look like a crazy person, made me look delusional, but it gave me a son and his name is Juicy and he lives forever on the Chachki of Media. He does. Oh, and I remember Milk Steve the Cream Lord himself turned around and asked you, what's
Starting point is 00:16:37 that? And I was just like, my son, next question, please. Yeah. We were just kind of seated out of the way and I couldn't think of any reason. There was seating still available in that section, but I don't know. I don't know. It looked like they were all like the Spanish speaking section and they were just like, nah, these two wouldn't fit in there.
Starting point is 00:17:00 Whether or not that's true, who am I to say? They're probably accurate in that assessment. But you know, I want to be where the fun is to quote the little mermaid. I want to be where the people are, but I want to see, I'm not going to keep going. I'm just saying we ended up where the white people are. Yes. So we were very much in the gringo section, which I would just say that's profiling and profiling, as we all know, is way too much.
Starting point is 00:17:32 This is. I like the way I'm going to give this week. This is way too much award to racial profiling for existing. Yeah, I don't think they were. I don't actually think it's what I don't think that's actually it. I think I think they had a full section in there like, well, we need to start filling another section because I noticed our server didn't interact with that section. Yeah, no, that's true.
Starting point is 00:18:06 He very much like he had our section. So I don't know. It was a thing I noticed for sure. It wasn't a thing that bothered me. And no, I don't actually think it was racial profiling. Now, what I did love and I mean love about the atmosphere of this place, the music was like normal top 40 songs with Mariachi infused into it. It wasn't like a Mariachi cover.
Starting point is 00:18:34 It was like they infused Mariachi instrumentation over a cold play song. And I was into it. I thought it added so much. I feel like the vocals were the original vocals. They were the original vocals. And like some of the instrumentation was the original thing. And then some of it was Mariachi. It was cool.
Starting point is 00:18:54 I don't know how they did it. Not that I think they're responsible. I'm sure it's like a Spotify playlist or something. They could be responsible. It's a national chain. Yeah, that's fair. Why couldn't they pay someone like a hundred bucks to edit a few songs together? I thought it was so dope.
Starting point is 00:19:08 Well, yeah, yeah, I just I thought it was cool to be cool. When we were there, it was brunch time. I didn't know that they were kind of known for a Sunday brunch. But that's what we ended up getting. You saw a sign for bottomless mimosas, which we did not get. Yeah. Oh, and also at the front area, like they had like survey says in a in a tin ice bucket.
Starting point is 00:19:30 Yeah, you know, we're talking about we just don't have words right now. Yeah, with like the Mexican like poncho tablecloth colors. I don't know how do you describe that style? I don't know. I think the audience but you don't know. And so, you know, they're very much like setting the table for brunch. So they're setting the table. Hey, get drunk here at brunch.
Starting point is 00:19:49 Yeah, get wasted at a Chevy's. I think that's the implication. When you predominantly display your alcohol right when you walk in. What does that say? Yeah, drink me, drink me. There was like an old car door, kind of like that rusty delivery truck door. Obviously, it said Bagnos. There were.
Starting point is 00:20:09 Well, like if we talk about the bathroom in particular, they had like those faucets that almost run out like a waterfall in a really like kind of majestic way. Do you know what I'm describing? It looks like kind of like a like like a big it's like a water slide, like a horizontal water slide in the water like gracefully. It looks very nice. Yeah, I think it was brass.
Starting point is 00:20:30 It's like cool stuff you find in rich people homes. Yeah, which I didn't expect in a Chevy's bathroom, but it was cool. That's what we got. Now, I want to talk about the menus and by menus, I mean a couple of menus. One, my menu was floppy. It had like the front page of it was just kind of like tattered and kind of hanging off of it. Menu upkeep is something that I am weirdly observant about.
Starting point is 00:20:56 Sticky menus. Yeah, that's a thing for this wasn't a sticky menu, but a floppy menu. Not as bad of of an infraction as a sticky menu, but floppy and sticky. Those are those are not the the ways I want my menus. Floppy and sticky are not too adjectives. You want anywhere near your food. Yeah, I want structural integrity. I'll offer up this, though.
Starting point is 00:21:21 Your floppy menu in my mind. That means a lot of people have used this. A lot of people have gotten enjoyment from the food here, ordering off of this menu. That menu is filled with memories. Now, what else I noticed a little bit later in our meal, there was a basketball team that like a high school girls basketball team that came into the restaurant. You and I were almost through our meal at that point, but they made such a big scene. I think they came in and they started doing cheers.
Starting point is 00:21:58 Oh, yeah, they were doing like hype up chants and cheers. And I'm like, you're not at a game right now. I miss. Yeah. Maybe they just won and they're excited. But maybe I don't know, do it in the parking lot. Don't come into a restaurant and then bark your cheers at people or at each other. I mean, I don't know. I feel like I'm being like a curmudgeon.
Starting point is 00:22:18 Like they were in a good mood. They were happy. Good for them. It didn't last too long. But the weird thing that happened was then they made a beeline, Garrett. They went right to the restrooms like a dozen girls piled in to. I mean, we were in the men's bathroom. I'm aware of the size. Yeah, I'm going to assume the women's bathroom and the men's bathroom are similar
Starting point is 00:22:41 in size and can maybe accommodate what, three people? Like one person at the same one year and all in one stall. Yeah, if you're going to be do mean restroom related activities. And I'm just like a dozen girls rushing into the bathroom out of sight. What's going on over there? Michael, what's going on over there? I hate that I know the answer to this, Garrett. I don't want to go down this rabbit hole.
Starting point is 00:23:16 You look pained right now. But I know what they were doing. What? It's a girl's basketball team. It's a competitive sport. Yeah. And I bet they just won a game. They just won a game. But they know that they need to change their strategy up from game to game. They need to determine a new starting lineup.
Starting point is 00:23:33 And how do they determine that starting lineup, Garrett? It's disgusting. Yeah. Why would they do this in the bathroom? It's it's gross. It's appalling. And I'm just reporting what I think they're doing. OK, they are factually one hundred percent doing for sure, in my opinion. They are having a not a dunking contest, but a buddha king contest.
Starting point is 00:23:57 They are doing trick shot. They're doing trick shits. They are having their time of their life. They're gathered around a toilet and they are just seeing who can use the bathroom in the most creative ways. The top five get to be the starting lineup at the next game. So it's like a slam dump competition. It's a it's a slam dump competition.
Starting point is 00:24:21 Y'all ready to shit? All right, ladies and gents, welcome back to the 69th annual but don't contest puts your cheeks together for our next dumper, Patty McBowles. This shot is a total crap shoot. She shoot. Oh, Patty McBowles has nailed the alley poop. She dumped right over a key of Fartes.
Starting point is 00:24:46 She pulls that one out of her ass, but I think she's got this one in the can. What do you all say? Y'all ready for shit? I really hope none of those girls were taking steroids. I feel like it would really affect the quality of their game plan in that bathroom. I think they would be able to perform better. Well, yeah, of course, you know, performance. I mean, their performance enhancing drugs. So they're taking poo enhancing drugs.
Starting point is 00:25:11 I think that's just called coffee. Anyways, yes, that has been what's going on over there. I'm sorry. All right, so we got to rate this atmosphere. We got to give it some thumbs. How do you feel about it, Garrett? I liked it. The whole fresh, bohemian, chic, entertaining atmosphere.
Starting point is 00:25:35 There were neon signs. I love the colors. Yeah, the colors were great. Like I'm such a sucker for like a turquoise color scheme. It really resonates with me in a way that I think is I don't know, basic. No, no, it was OK. It was cleanly entertaining. Everything fit together.
Starting point is 00:25:52 It was consistent. Yeah, you knew you were walking into a hiptex mechs joint straight away. Now, honestly, if El Machino, if El Machino, if El Machino was still there. Al Pacino, yeah, we're there. If El Machino was operating and still there, easy two thumbs up for me. Just for the spectacle of it. Totally. Without it, though, I still enjoyed it. I'm going to go one thumb up on the atmosphere.
Starting point is 00:26:17 Chevy's, I'm going to go one thumb up, too. Two thumbs up if there were El Machino, but one thumb up, Chevy's. You've done a good job. You've done good, kid. You've done bueno. You've done bueno. That was a really weird accent for that. You've done the bueno.
Starting point is 00:26:33 I'm an Italian guy in a Mexican restaurant. Service. OK, so now we get to our server, a guy who I feel like. What was that moan? The way I have to. You know what? This guy reminded me a kind of the guy from Bobby. Yeah, yeah, he.
Starting point is 00:26:58 OK, well, they look similar. That didn't help. You said you were about to. I saw the look in your face, but it came out of your mouth, not mine. But it's not wrong. They did, you know, they had a resemblance to each other. So obviously it puts that in your mind. And yeah, we got not nearly as egregious as Bob's big boy,
Starting point is 00:27:18 but we definitely got the the back burner treatment for a little bit. Yeah, you know, he was nice. He was nice and pleasant up to a point here. I'm going to try to give some positive things about our server. Yes, he reminded me of our Waffle House server and the fact that when he wasn't at our table, I noticed him doing a lot of his side work. Yeah, so this man was constantly was always in motion,
Starting point is 00:27:40 but he wasn't always checking in with us, which I wanted more check ins. You know, there was definitely a lot of buildup on our table stuff that would have been nice to have taken away, even if it's like, hey, can I just grab that plate out of the way? It's just like, yeah, like this is a thing. The little things continually running into like a lack of busing. Is this like a post pandemic thing that happens at restaurants? Yeah, maybe.
Starting point is 00:27:59 We did get a manager check in. Manager came by and just kind of asked how things were. At that point, I think we had had our flout the issue that we'll get into. And, you know, we didn't make note of it. Typically, when the manager comes by, I'm not looking to, you know, I'm not looking to rat anyone out on any complaints or anything like that. So my default response when I see a manager is just, yeah, things are good. Yeah, we're not going to rat out people with complaints in the restaurant.
Starting point is 00:28:24 We're just going to like put it on the Internet for anyone to hear everywhere. Yeah, that's all we're going to do. It's OK. They could stab me in the ribs and I'm holding the bleeding wound. I ain't no rat. Snitches get stitches. And apparently, if I don't snitch, I already have stitches in this case. But I'm not telling a manager on you, your secret is safe with us. I don't know, you know, treat us how you want. We're going to talk about it on the podcast, but we don't want to get anyone in trouble.
Starting point is 00:28:49 We're not looking to mess with anyone's livelihood. That said, I didn't love this server. I would say, overall, he was fine. He was attentive for a while, but we had our second incident in the run of the podcast where we sent back food. We did, and I was fully behind it this now. If you don't know, we did make a song about sending back food. You can check out our Olive Garden musical about sending back our calamari.
Starting point is 00:29:21 Oh, could you think of just sending back food? How do you say this? I'm not going to eat this. So waiter, please, we'll send this back. You can check it out and perfectly adequate our Olive Garden musical. Now, in this case, it was not calamari. It was actually what is historically my favorite Mexican food, flotas. My dad makes the best flotas.
Starting point is 00:29:49 I grew up on them. You know, he makes beef, he makes chicken. In recent years, I've gotten him to experiment with carnitas. We had the carnitas when we were in Austin with them. It was so good. Best ever. Now, the way he makes them is, you know, you just need the meat and the tortilla. The tortilla is kind of made of perfection, a little bit fluffy, a little bit crispy. But, you know, when you when you eat my dad's flotas, the day he makes them
Starting point is 00:30:13 versus like, you know, warmed up later, where they get a little too crunchy. But, man, they are they're they're 10 out of 10. They're they're great hands down 10 out of 10. I ate them until I got sick. Yeah. Now, when you go to a chain restaurant, they try to get a little fancy with their flotas. They're always trying to stuff things in there. And I'm always used to flotas being things that you kind of top with stuff.
Starting point is 00:30:37 Now, specifically, the menu said that it had cheese, sour cream, a couple of other things. I asked for them, no sour cream, no cheese. I asked, can you do no cheese? And he said, yes, he did. And confidently, yes, confidently. Yes. Then because you ask every single time, I just dish that could have cheese in it, even if it doesn't say cheese. Look, I'm a guy who doesn't like cheese.
Starting point is 00:31:04 We have found a way to make up for it by having our good friend, Stephen. Thank you, Stephen. I hope you get better. I hope you're. Yeah, I hope your jaw improves. The flotas came and I see goo. I see goo. You see goo. So you were worried. You're like, I know. Look, try that. Nothing else looks like melted cheese. You can tell melted cheese when you see it.
Starting point is 00:31:26 Yeah. So I tried it. We'll discuss what's actually inside. Yeah. Later. But I tried it and there was cheese. I even took a bite, which if I see cheese, me taking a bite is a big deal. It's not something that I mess around with. It's not something I take lightly. I just I don't want cheese. No, you can have all the cheese listeners. You I will unto you all the cheese that you would ever want.
Starting point is 00:31:52 You can take it from me. Hey, listeners, you know what a smart thing to do? Get in relationships with a partner that is the opposite cheese taste as you. So you can either get none of the cheese or all of the cheese. Yeah, it's it's a good setup. And you and I both have that set up. It's perfect. And the waiter comes by and we're basically like, hey, there's cheese in this. And this man proceeded to cheese light us.
Starting point is 00:32:17 She's like, oh, like gas lighting, but with cheese. He was a cheese lighter. He was. Yeah. No, you're right. He was cheese lighting. There was definitely cheese and he was like, that's not cheese. He's like, no, there's cheese on top. There was no cheese on top. There was cheese on top and I had them not do it.
Starting point is 00:32:29 I was like, there's cheese in it. Look at it. What is this? Is this cheese? What freaking color is this? We weren't we weren't like screaming at him the way we are right now. But we were feeling this on the inside. I was I was internally yelling. I guess, yeah, our digestive tracts were internally shouting at us at the same time, too.
Starting point is 00:32:45 And because you're lactose intolerant. Yeah, like this this is a thing where it's like your body doesn't handle it well. Like, it reminds you like I'm not I'm not going to die, but I'm sorry. You're going to Michael had to be in a car with me afterwards. Yeah, I don't accept. I reject the apology. No, I appreciate the apology. I don't know.
Starting point is 00:33:07 It just got to a point where don't tell me that there's not like, don't look at a thing and be like, that's not cheese. Like, yeah, don't cheese like us. That's a great term, Garrett. He was cheese lighting us all the way. I pulled out my phone. I've looked up the ingredients listed on their website and it even says there is cheese inside.
Starting point is 00:33:25 Yeah. Whereas the taquitos said that there was cheese on top. Yes. So but different dishes. So I think he may have been confusing the two, but that doesn't change the fact that like, hey, man, we know cheese. Like we taste it. We see it. But yeah, I don't know. I just I didn't appreciate the, I guess, lack of understanding of like, hey, they may not like this.
Starting point is 00:33:46 I don't know. I don't think that it should be a waiter's demeanor to kind of be like, deal with it, which is kind of what it felt like. Yeah. And we ended up just asking him to like take it away. And, you know, from that point on, I felt like he was a little frosty. He was a little frosty. He was a little nippy.
Starting point is 00:34:03 Yeah, I don't know. And we weren't, you know, we played up for the podcast. We weren't like confrontational about it or anything. I was just like, yeah, you know, there's cheese in here. We asked for no cheese. And it was sort of a thing where what I was waiting for from him was to say, like, oh, we can remake these and make sure there's no cheese. Because I did want the floutes, but at the end of the day,
Starting point is 00:34:22 it sounded like taking them away was all that either he was willing to do or all he would do, but we didn't get charged for them. So we did send it back. I didn't appreciate the cheese lighting. So I'm going to go one thumbs down. I don't think this guy was like a bad waiter. He's not going to go down as like, oh, I remember him and hold a grudge. And he's he's on my shit list or anything like that.
Starting point is 00:34:42 But yeah, one thumb down, I think you're trying to be nice about it. I'm not going to be nice about it. One thumb down for this cheese lighter. And now a word from our totally not made up sponsor. Oh, hi there. It's your favorite sponsor, Job. And I am back with a brand new business plan. My wet nap slogan plans from last week fell through
Starting point is 00:35:03 because I turned in way too many that had the word DILF in it. You win some, you lose some or tie this week. I'm on to something great. Are you a server who's tired of dealing with difficult customers who have dietary restrictions, lactose intolerance, this and seafood allergy? And please stick me with my EpiPen because this thing had peanuts on it. Well, I'm sick of them, too. Who needs them?
Starting point is 00:35:26 You're going to love my product from this week. It's called denial. Oh, excuse me, Mr. Is that cheese in the flowers? No, it's not. Just say no. If you can't handle food as is, stay inside your home. You know, I once stayed inside my home for 16 months, but it was court mandated.
Starting point is 00:35:43 But now I'm out, but I'm not out of ideas. Denial, it worked for me. It could work for you, too. If that sounds good, call me. Not on the phone. Throw your location on the back of a $20 bill like it's a treasure map. Drop it in a glass bottle and throw it into the ocean. I'll find you.
Starting point is 00:35:59 And before you know it, you'll be able to get through an entire shift without fulfilling any requests for any customers. And you'll be living the life. OK, bye. Food. I'll say this up front. Eating was a lot more difficult for me that day because I was fighting back the heartburn from the hot sauce.
Starting point is 00:36:17 But we'll try not to let that impact the actual ratings of the food. And actually, I found another thing. I'm a little lactose intolerant. I'm also allergic to carrots. And one of the hot sauces I tried, the second ingredient was carrots. So I'm a little digestionally challenged already. Right. So the first thing they put on the table, chips and salsa. You know, it's a Mexican joint.
Starting point is 00:36:40 Yeah, that's what you get. Yeah, you get chips and salsa. And we asked for some guaca as well. I thought the chips and salsa were actually pretty solid. The salsa was very smoky. The chips were a little on the wispy side, but they didn't end up devolving into this big, smashed, crumbly, you know, pile of dust, which I like, I like a chip that holds its integrity,
Starting point is 00:37:02 especially when the salsa is it wasn't watery. Yeah, it was a little it was a little thicker. It didn't have chunks in it, which I appreciate. I do like my honestly, this is probably texturally exactly where I like my salsa. It was kind of like almost a more finely diced up pico. Yeah, it was good. I give seven out of ten for the chips and salsa. Wow.
Starting point is 00:37:24 I enjoyed the chips and salsa. Like as Michael said, the chips, they stayed together. That is such a benefit of these. Yeah. But the salsa, it was the smokiness was interesting. Like I have nothing against it, but I almost got like a paprika vibe in it. And like you are anti paprika train. You're on an anti paprika.
Starting point is 00:37:43 I am because I don't understand. I make paprika is God's gift to seasoning. Mind you, I cook with a lot of paprika myself. Yeah. But I don't know, maybe I found the point where the smokiness just really reminds me of I think it was there. I don't I don't view that as a negative, but it was just it was weird. Buds are different.
Starting point is 00:38:00 So I'll give this like maybe overall the chips. These were decent chips. The salsa was interesting. So like five and a half out of ten. Yeah. To me, honestly, the the chips were what could have enhanced the rating more for me. I thought the salsa was very solid for a table salsa at a Mexican restaurant. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:38:20 They consist like we're used to like more of a watery consistency for table salsa. Yeah. And this stayed on the chips. Yeah, it was great. But now we also got guac with it. Yeah. Now the guac, I I love guac. I thought the tomato was too prominent in this guac. I had like tomato chunks in it and it kind of dominated the taste in a direction
Starting point is 00:38:41 that wasn't where I was in the mood for, I guess, with my guac. Five and a half out of ten for the guac. OK, so fine. I found it to be a little chunky, but in a different way. I like it when the avocado chunks aren't fully mashed up. So like a little avocado chunkiness, but everything else was, I guess, nothing to write home about. There weren't any flavors that were standouts.
Starting point is 00:39:04 It was an overall safe, acceptable guac. Yeah. So like maybe I was very safe. Yeah, I'll give it a five and a half out of ten, too. Same rating as me. If this is put in front of me, I will still consume it and enjoy it. But I've had much better. I then got the housemade tortilla soup. It had corn, avocado, chicken, tortillas.
Starting point is 00:39:25 It was solid. I ended up drinking the whole thing once I got down to like only broth. It's six out of ten. You know, a soup I would order again, a soup I would call fine. A soup I would go so far as to say it's on the on the cusp of being good. OK, it fulfilled my desires of what I was looking for from that soup. And it did literally nothing more than that. So six out of ten.
Starting point is 00:39:48 OK, did you get any like super salad? Or no, I did not. You went straight to the entree. I went straight to the entree. Would you get I got the churro pancakes? I've got opinions because you you cut me off a pretty sizable portion of that stack. But I want to hear what you have to say. OK, first of all, the pancakes were a little overdone.
Starting point is 00:40:06 Yeah, they reminded me of just your random grandpa being drunk, like in your random grandpa or a random random grandpa who sneaks in your house and makes you pan cakes. Yeah, as as random grandpa's are known to do. So now they were a little brown for my liking. They were a little tough. So as a pancake alone, if this was just called a regular pancake, it would be middling at best. OK. But they made a churro pancake.
Starting point is 00:40:34 Did they? And you know what they get it? No, they didn't. In what world does churro belong in the name of this pancake? I took as many bites of it as I did. Only to be like, did I get one that just didn't have cinnamon? And before I knew it, I had consumed maybe a quarter of your dish. And I still tasted no cinnamon. In what world is this a churro pancake?
Starting point is 00:40:59 This is a churro pancake in the way that Dr. Pepper has a PhD. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like there was barely any sugar or cinnamon on top of these pancakes. It was disgusting. It had some strawberry. It had like the visual of powdered sugar. But even then, like the taste of it and the strawberries, they look dry and plastic. Yeah, I wouldn't go so far as to call this a bad dish, but I would go so far as to call it the most disappointing dish I've had in a
Starting point is 00:41:23 long time, because I expected like upper echelon deliciousness, like culinary breakfast masterpiece, like churros. Yes, please. Pancakes. Yes, please. Let's put them together. Uh, it did not. It didn't cut it. What's your score on this? If these were just random, overdone, drunk pancakes. Five out of 10. Right.
Starting point is 00:41:46 But they call them churro pancakes. Now, four out of 10, because you just named it this thing that is 100 percent not. Also, where is the soft moist filling inside the pancakes? These things were a little dry. Yeah, I'm right there with you. I think, well, I put a hefty amount of syrup on it, which kind of gave it that moisture and with the syrup, I think I on the whole, I liked it more than you did. But that doesn't change the fact that I was so disappointed by the potential
Starting point is 00:42:12 it could have been. I'm just going to go five out of 10. But man, we live in a world where these could have been nine out of 10, just conceptually speaking, it's not the world we got. No, it would be a good way to do this. Have these pancakes. Cream cheese doesn't go inside of churros, but maybe have like a sweet cream cheese filling in between the pancakes. See, I'm not even here for that.
Starting point is 00:42:33 That's the difference between us. I won't even do a cream cheese. Oh, I will, though. But give maybe frosting something, put something in, put a frosting or even just like some sort of cinnamon compote, like apple cinnamon compote. Oh, man, that'd be amazing. That would be very tasty. But not what we got moving on to the next.
Starting point is 00:42:48 I got a combo fajitas dish. I got the carnitas and I got the sirloin steak. This probably the strongest part of the meal. I thought both the carnitas and because we split both of the things. And they had fresh house, like in-house made tortillas that came with it. Not by El Machino, though. Not by El Machino, but still very, you know, I had one like right as it got to me. And then I had one a little bit later.
Starting point is 00:43:14 There's a little crisp, too, still. It was textural perfection. The carnitas maybe a little less, quote, unquote, fall off the bone than I would have liked. But I had a few bites that were like melt in your mouth. Good. And then I had a few bites that were a little bit tougher. The steak part of it. I think you liked more than I did. Yes, this. OK, the steak had a beautiful char to it.
Starting point is 00:43:41 How often do you go out to any place other than true fine dining and get an appropriate char? Yeah, you don't. Yeah. But to me, it fell into a, yeah, but the seasoning or whatever. It wasn't really like the flavor combination of whatever was seasoning that sirloin didn't really do a lot for me. It was passable. I had a couple really good. Like I got one that just had the right perfect amount of fat on it.
Starting point is 00:44:09 And it was a really good bite of steak. But I think of I'd say probably only 20 to 30 percent of that steak was I really into it. Whereas with the carnitas, maybe about like 60 to 70 percent of my bites, I was like, oh, yeah, this is hitting where I want it to. So I'm going to go I'm going to go seven out of 10 on the sirloin steak, eight out of 10 on the carnitas part of it. Wow. Yeah, I'll do a 7.5 out of 10 for the steak. That was a beautiful char.
Starting point is 00:44:37 The char alone makes that for me. And then we'll just go. The carnitas were a little smoky. Nothing wrong with that. Nothing wrong with smoky. I love a little bit of smokiness. They were to maybe my pieces were a little more tender than yours. Yeah, it almost kind of gave me the vibe of Bob's pulled pork sandwich flavor almost.
Starting point is 00:44:55 OK, which is that was the thing I liked the most. Yeah, so I'll give a good seven out of 10 for these. That's respectable. And then, you know, there were some sides with it. The tortilla itself, I'm going to give a nine out of 10 on that tortilla. Wow. I thought it was a masterful tortilla. The onion, like the vegetables that were seared. Those were good.
Starting point is 00:45:14 I was actually scooping up just spoonfuls of straight up grilled onions. I'm maybe maybe the best I've had just onion with no frills prepared. Eight out of 10 on the onions. The beans, they were beans a la charra. They didn't taste really any different than any other beans I've had. I will say those beans, they were distinctly, again, paprika, smoky, cumin and chili. It's like paprika, cumin, chili.
Starting point is 00:45:41 That is all I got out of those. Yeah, I go perfectly averaged five out of 10 beans, five out of 10 rice. Neither of them were anything special to me. Yeah, the rice was a little bland for me. Four out of 10 for both of those. Yeah. But oh, you love that tortilla, didn't you? I did love the tortilla. It was good.
Starting point is 00:45:58 I'm going to have to go eight out of 10. But that would have been a nine if it was El Machino. El Machino has really found a place in my heart. Yes. Overall, though, what would you give the fajitas as a dish? Everything together on the same tortilla. Seven out of 10. I'd order it again. OK, I'd call it good. I'll go 6.5 out of 10.
Starting point is 00:46:19 Average of everything together on the tortilla. OK, Garrett, so now we have to get to. The thing that ignited an hour of fighting in the car afterwards, the dessert, fried ice cream with tortilla strips. First of all, what is so funny to me is that at the end of the day, we both ended up in a spot where we think the same thing about the quality of this dish and the elements of it, but for very different reasons.
Starting point is 00:46:56 And so we're like splitting hairs here in such a way that caused us to just go off. So fried ice cream, how can you describe that? OK, fried ice cream is just a frozen ball of ice cream that is then battered and quickly deep fried. I assume you've got to pull this bad boy right out of the freezer before you batter it and drop it in right away. And that's all it is. It's literally battered deep fried ice cream.
Starting point is 00:47:26 I have had this dish before and the last time I had it, it was incredibly fresh. I could tell they just pulled it out of the deep fryer. They put it on my plate and brought it out to me. It was beautifully crisp, but yet it was still cold on the inside. Yeah. So what this dish had, this was my first time having fried ice cream. And I thought the breading, the dough was truly a giant disappointment. Yeah, it was crap. It was not crisp.
Starting point is 00:47:54 It was it was soggy. Yeah, it had absorbed the cold to the point that it just it threw off the texture of, you know, what you expect something crispy to be. And when you advertise fried, that comes with crispy. I can't think of a single fried item that you don't expect that texture. Right. And I was really let down. That doesn't mean that the combination of flavors wasn't good. Of course, you know, ice cream, some chocolates and whipped cream.
Starting point is 00:48:21 The tortilla strips, it had the flavor. It was supposed to have a flavor was supposed to. But that texture of the dough around it, that's what that's why you get it. Yeah, that's why you're getting this dish. And I think here's our difference. The tortilla strips. Now, those tortilla strips, they were crispy and cinnamony and sugary. Those tortilla strips were the texture.
Starting point is 00:48:45 Yes. The outside battering was supposed to be. Yes, it was. And I thought that they added a lot to this dish to keep it from truly being a giant disappointment. These tortilla strips put the dish on their back. They carried it up the mountain to mediocre. Like, again, this isn't a high scoring dish, but, you know, they did save the dish a little.
Starting point is 00:49:14 And I think it's crap because deep fried. Conceptually, conceptually, it's crap because deep fried ice cream shouldn't need tortilla strips to give it a crunch. Like, are you going to be a professional bowler and use the bumpers? Come on. But at the end of the day, if bowlers were in a competition that said there were bumpers, then judging them against each other within the confines of the bumpers is a fair thing to do. Now, this dish advertised the tortilla strips.
Starting point is 00:49:46 And you are basically what we thought about for an hour or so was. I called these tortilla strips P.E.D. They're performance enhancing dessert toppers. These were performance enhancing dessert toppers. And my whole thing is, but they said they would have them there. It's the difference between being caught with steroids when you're not allowed to use them and them just saying, hey, steroids are allowed in this league and you get caught with them.
Starting point is 00:50:18 And it's like, yeah, but I expected them. They were an advertised part of the experience. So I'm not knocking a dish for including tortilla strips that enhance the crunch admittedly in an unearned way that the dough itself did not get when it's advertised. You know what? I am a purist. I don't think Barry Bonds deserves to be in the Hall of Fame. But Roger Clemens does not deserve to be in the Hall of Fame.
Starting point is 00:50:42 Sammy Sosa does not deserve to be in the Hall of Fame. If you used P.E.D.s, you should not be there. So that is the same way. This I don't want to watch steroid baseball. I don't care. But here's the thing. I want to watch the classic game I grew up watching. So give me my deep fried ice cream that is classic the way I grew up with. Not then order deep fried ice cream.
Starting point is 00:51:02 That is classic the way you grew up with. Don't order a deep fried ice cream that says it comes with tortilla strips. They only gave me the option of steroid baseball. Like there's no regular baseball on TV. I want regular baseball. But what if what if there were two leagues in baseball and there was one just called steroid baseball? Oh, God, that would be.
Starting point is 00:51:26 Like I don't want to be a stick in the mud, but this steroid strip filled abominations. But now here's the thing that caused me to go off on you. But you liked them. You enjoyed the tortilla strips and what they added. And I still rated it the same way. I'm just offended that it exists, which is why I back down because it didn't affect your rating.
Starting point is 00:51:54 My wild take here has nothing to do with the rating. I'm just offended on principle that they would do this thing to the dish. But, you know, sometimes restaurants, they take risks. They take a risk at these chain restaurants and they create some truly wild concoctions. And sometimes they hit and boy, do they hit well. Like the Pasta Laya, like the Oreo banana bread pudding. Like sometimes you just got to go crazy.
Starting point is 00:52:20 And the pasta lie is a conceptual abomination. It is the only difference was it didn't have soggy batter around it. If this fried ice cream had lived up to fried ice cream on its own merit and the dough had been good, there would be no complaint on your end about the tortilla strips. You would just be talking about how they enhanced the crunch complaining. I don't agree with that because I think the pasta lie is the example. I think the pasta lie had it not worked.
Starting point is 00:52:48 You would have complained from the standpoint of a purist. You're not, you know, I'm right. You know, I'm right. But if the deep fried ice cream gave me everything I wanted from the shell in the ice cream alone, it wouldn't have needed the strips. Not about what it needs. It's about innovation. We're we're in the modern age, baby.
Starting point is 00:53:06 We just had the world's fair. We just introduced the flying car. The Jetsons are on TV, you know, it's the way of the future, baby. We're putting tortilla strips in places they don't need it. Before you know it, tortilla strips are going to be adorning, you know, your omelettes. I'm going to tie four leaf clovers to tortilla strips and toss them at random passer buyers while I'm wasted on St. Patrick's Day. Yeah, but I don't know.
Starting point is 00:53:31 At the end of the day, it's a food. You can mix foods. That's what culinary creations are. You mix foods together and you make some some interesting combinations that you wouldn't have had before. I get being a purist, I get it. But, you know, live a little man. Where's the adventure?
Starting point is 00:53:46 Where's the sense of adventure? My sense of adventure died along with the instant disappointment I got when I bit into the soggy shell of this deep fried ice cream for a dessert that killed your sense of adventure. What do you rate it? I'm going to rate it a five out of 10. It murdered your sense of adventure five out of 10. I also give it a five out of 10.
Starting point is 00:54:09 So despite all of this on principle disagreement, we ended up at the same rating. Yeah, five out of 10. Five out of 10. It honestly, I'd probably have it again. I'd have it again. You can't screw up ice cream. Yeah. Anyways, overall for this meal at Chevy's pretty middle of the road,
Starting point is 00:54:26 I'm just going to go zero thumbs. Garrett, do you have a final food score? Zero thumbs. Zero thumbs for you. Zero thumbs for me. That's all they get. Sorry, Chevy's. Munchkin menu musings. Hi, my name is Pierce.
Starting point is 00:54:44 I'm six. I'm going to review the Chevy's kids menu. I did, I did this first. It's where you enact the numbers and see what you made. I made a cutar. This is me and this is me eating the avocado. We tried to color him green, but it didn't really work. We tried to use yellow and blue, but it didn't work.
Starting point is 00:55:13 The word search was pretty easy to find all the words because they because I could look where like to the top and that was easy. And they're all types of peppers. Matching the maracas, they were pretty easy because you just had to look at their tops. The maze was was was easy because I had to look where I was going to get to the exit. We had to figure out how many though they were in cheese was one onion was two pepper was four and tomato was three.
Starting point is 00:55:55 I give the score. It is 24 out of all the numbers. This has been much in menu musings. Thank you. Final rating. Well, Garrett, I gave one thumb up one thumb down and no thumbs across the board in the three categories that equals zero overall. I happen to give exactly the same rating.
Starting point is 00:56:36 We got to give it a number and I mean, this thing's got a case. Could it be our perfect five? It is at a zero thumbs across the board. Yeah, it's all nub. No, it's all not. It's not the nubs. Hashtag nubs strong. Yeah, I'm going five point three five.
Starting point is 00:56:53 I think when you add all the elements up for me, despite it being zero thumbs, it did come out as a net positive. I am such a sucker for this aesthetic and I feel like just being in an environment that I like the color palette of and it's pleasant and it's, you know, kind of energetic and like that mariachi music. To me, the atmosphere is kind of what waits this whole experience in a positive direction for me, because just something about taking in the whole experience in a good mood, in a good place, five point three five.
Starting point is 00:57:25 I'm not going to venture too far away from the five point zero zero that defines mediocrity, but I think this was more than enough above mediocre overall to give it a five point three five. Although we both had the same amount of thumbs or lack thereof. My ratings can be a little bit different. Yeah. I experienced the weight of this slightly differently. The biggest thing I have that takes away from this meal.
Starting point is 00:57:51 I hate to keep bringing it up, but the cheese lighting. Oh, yeah. The waiter denying the presence of cheese in our dish that obviously had it. The gas lighting, it's the principle of it. Yeah, I don't like the attitude. I don't like that because I don't care. There's a mistake. Whatever, send it back.
Starting point is 00:58:11 I just say. Yeah, no skin off our back. Skin off our back. Yeah, don't be like, there's no cheese in it. What are you stupid? And that just that entire experience kind of negatively weighted. This is, I guess, average experience cloud. So I'm going to go four point eight one four point eight one.
Starting point is 00:58:27 Well, that means if we average our scores together, we can throw Chevy's up on the Chachki of mediocrity. Chachki of mediocrity are Frankenstein while Chachki that is a running tally of all of our restaurants so far with a nice bright lit up star in the middle indicating that perfect five point zero. Chevy's, you are very close. Five point zero eight. Wow, not our most mediocre place.
Starting point is 00:58:54 That bar is still held by Waffle House, but a tie for the second most mediocre. So it's an inverted Bob's big boy. It's an inverted Bob's big boy. Bob's big boy four point nine two, which puts it at point eight away from the perfect five, and then obviously a five point eight is also point eight away from the perfect five, but in the positive direction. Chevy's, you're very mediocre. You should be so OK with how mediocre you are, but you're not the most mediocre.
Starting point is 00:59:23 But still, hey, go home, feel decent, pour yourself a lukewarm bath, put in like half a cap of bubbles, don't mix it up properly. Take a shitty bubble bath. Put on an any a CD, but that CD has a few scratches on it. So it like sit. Yeah, a couple of little skips. You should be mildly proud of yourself. But we got to keep looking, Garrett.
Starting point is 00:59:52 Yeah, we need to find mediocrity. We haven't found it yet. We have a little game that we got to play, Garrett. What's it called? The headline game. The rules of the headline game are as follows. Garrett will present three headlines to Michael that include this week's restaurant, they can be made up or they can be actual headlines.
Starting point is 01:00:14 If Michael can correctly guess if at least two out of three are real or fake, he will get to select next week's restaurant. However, if Garrett stumps him, he'll select again. Are you ready to play, fellas? I am ready. Let's go. Headline number one, Utah. Chevy's Freshmex manager murdered in restaurant shooting rampage.
Starting point is 01:00:50 True. OK, next one, squatters and vandals keep cooking up trouble at Modesto's old Chevy's Freshmex restaurant. Seems like a tongue twister. I'm going to say false. The final one, Cook loses arm in tortilla accident at Chevy's Freshmex and other wild restaurant news. False.
Starting point is 01:01:13 So you went true, false, false. I did. Well, the first one, Utah, Chevy's Freshmex manager murdered in restaurant shooting rampage. That was unfortunately true in the very first headline I pulled up. Man, that is rough. I don't like that. That's true.
Starting point is 01:01:31 The next one, squatters, vandals keep cooking up trouble at Modesto's old Chevy's Freshmex restaurant. You said false. I did. That was true. Oh, it was true. Oh, I'm one in one. Down to the last one, the last one of Cook loses arm in tortilla
Starting point is 01:01:46 accident at Chevy's Freshmex and other wild restaurant news. I said false. And I made that one up. So I'm correct. You are correct. I win the headline game. Oh, where are we going next week? You know what, Garrett, in the last five episodes,
Starting point is 01:02:07 we've had all the places with cheese in their name. We went to Cheddar's. We went to Chuck E. Cheese, but there's one that kind of stands head and shoulders above all the rest in terms of its reputation as a chain restaurant. We're going to go to one of the heavy hitters. OK, we're going to go to one of the big bad boys in the game of casual dining and in our quest for mediocrity,
Starting point is 01:02:32 the last one of the trilogy of cheese named places. We're going to Mr. Novel-sized menu himself, the cheesecake factory. Wow, I'm excited for this. I am. I feel very middling about this. Honestly, I expect this to perform very mediocre. I've always enjoyed the food there. It's never been excellent, but I've never had a bad meal.
Starting point is 01:02:58 I haven't either. I don't know. We'll see how this goes. But I am I am excited to knock this one off because I feel like it might be our most requested place. Everyone right away, they're like cheesecake factory, do it. Everyone's telling me to do the cheesecake factory. So, you know what? We're listening. We're going to go to the cheesecake factory.
Starting point is 01:03:18 We're going to do it for you. And next week, you'll be able to listen to the fine dining podcast as we go to the cheesecake factory. If you've ever worked at a cheesecake factory, please send us your story. Anything crazy or heartwarming or anything in between. Tell us your fun story. If you've just had a crazy experience as a customer at a cheesecake factory, send us that story, you know, and just a voice submission,
Starting point is 01:03:45 preferably with a quiet background sent to us at fine dining podcast at gmail.com. If you have a kid who you want to have review the kids menu, we'd love to have them. That would be awesome. Oh, hey, you know what? I just remember this is a random fact. Yeah, our special guest from Waffle House, Jerry Springer himself. Yeah, used to live above a cheesecake factory. What an in. Huh.
Starting point is 01:04:11 How do you know that? It was the John Hancock Center in Chicago. So there were there were a lot of apartment buildings. Oh, OK. Cool. Well, thanks, everyone, for listening to the fine dining podcast. The search for the most mediocre restaurant in America. I was your host, Michael Ornelas. I was your host. Why?
Starting point is 01:04:27 Why are we past tense hosting? I'm still your host, Garrett's work. We're ghosty, boy. I don't know. That's the end of the episode. I was the host of this episode that you just heard, I guess. I mean, I will be your host again next week. I will, too. Unless unless like your rabies kicks in, then we're both done. You never know. You never know.
Starting point is 01:04:43 And if you don't know what he's referencing, go listen to our Denny's episode. We talk about my dog bite. You say that so fondly, like, oh, man, I remember this dog bite the best time of my life. Honestly, though, that Denny's experience was a lot of fun. It was. It was a wild night. 2 a.m. at a Denny's on a Saturday night in a college town. A lot of shit happened.
Starting point is 01:05:03 Anyways, thanks, everyone, for listening. The search continues. We'll see you next week. Have a fine day. The search continues. We still need the perfect five. The search continues. Like and subscribe. The search continues.
Starting point is 01:05:24 Our journey did not conclude. The moderate search continues. Write us an iTunes review. And hey, while you're at it, why don't you go ahead and make it five stars? Come on. Follow us on TikTok. The same on Instagram. All the socials at Fine Dining Podcast.
Starting point is 01:05:55 We have a website. FineDiningPodcast.com. Buy our t-shirts, then put them on. And don't forget, you can always suggest where we go next. OK, we're going to find a mediocrity. The search continues. See you next week. Hurt my throat a little.
Starting point is 01:06:35 Have a fine day.

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