F**kface - Andrew's Blindside

Episode Date: October 14, 2023

It's been a while but a new Blindside has emerged. With the gang gathering under the pretense of watching a cool Tony Hawk Pro Skater video, Andrew Blindsides everyone into watching Canadian televisio...n series The Littlest Hobo. Andrew's got that dog in him. Watch the episode here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujvzAdvdS7A Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Starting point is 00:01:10 Visit dragonsdogma.com to buy the game and start your epic quest today. That's D-R-A-G-O-N-S-D-O-G-M-A.com to learn more. Okay, and then this is the audio sync countdown. Five, four, three, two, one. Zero. And it doesn't matter Because this is a blindside Y'all get blindsided
Starting point is 00:01:47 This is a blindside I was really excited for Tony Hawk Yes oh my we're gonna do Tony Hawk Some other time I'm here With a blindside on you guys we're gonna watch An episode of a show not that it Has to be this for a blindside But I wanted to share a
Starting point is 00:02:03 Weird piece of Canadian history with all y'all. Eric, I'm going to send you a link if you wouldn't mind sharing this because you know how to do this. Yeah, sure. On episode of a show. We are going to watch
Starting point is 00:02:14 a Canadian staple, a Canadian classic, an all-time episode of The Littlest Hobo, everyone's favorite TV show. Excuse me? What? The Littlest Hobo. Jeff loves hobos show. Excuse me? The Littlest Hobo.
Starting point is 00:02:30 I don't know if we're allowed to say that, but all right, sure. How long is The Littlest Hobo? 22 minutes. Oh, perfect. 23 minutes, 45 seconds. Do you have time for The Littlest Hobo? Just a little bit of The Littlest Hobo. Oh, my God.
Starting point is 00:02:43 Is it like freaking Lassie? So it's a dog show, and every every episode the dog saves people and helps problems this actually i believe is where mike myers got his start he's in an episode of this uh one of the greatest tv show themes you will ever hear okay so this is like skippy the wonder kangaroo or whatever. The Bush Kangaroo. Exactly. Whatever that is. Yes. This is Season 1, Episode 16, Snapshot. It is, I think, a fantastic view of shitty parenting in the 80s and what is viewed as essential.
Starting point is 00:03:17 And it's a wild ride that I'm excited to share with you guys. I was so excited for Tony Hawk. I've been playing Tony Hawk. That was the perfect amount of time between blindsides. It really was. I didn't even consider it. I'm so impressed with you guys. I was so excited for Tony Hawk. I've been playing Tony Hawk. That was the perfect amount of time between blindsides. It really was. I didn't even consider it. I'm so impressed with you, Andrew.
Starting point is 00:03:30 Yeah, I gotta be honest. I don't think I could be more blindsided than I am right now. You waited just long enough that I forgot that that was a thing. You said it's a blindside and I immediately needed to piss for some reason.
Starting point is 00:03:45 Okay, you guys ready for the littlest hobo? Oh, I'm ready. Yeah. Okay, you guys ready for The Littlest Hobo? Oh, I'm ready. Okay, here it comes. How many seasons did they have? Like four or five, I want to say. A while. Too many. Alright, I'm hitting play. Oh, it's great. This is The Littlest Hobo season one, episode 16, snapshot.
Starting point is 00:04:00 Three, two, one, play. Can you hear that? Oh, yeah, we can. Is the dog flying the helicopter? Yeah, I would like to assume so. In the room. Oh, he's being London.
Starting point is 00:04:15 This is really cool because I don't know if Gracie knows what a blindside is, so she's really flying blind here. Andrew has just hit us with something that we didn't think we were going to watch and now we have to. So that's blindside. Welcome to it.
Starting point is 00:04:31 Yeah, this is only the second time it's ever happened, Gracie. And we're just as surprised as you are. Yeah. I think I've used this editing template in Windows Movie Maker. Oh my God, he's got a gun! There's an active shooter in the field.
Starting point is 00:04:51 Jeff, do you remember when every show just had the longest intro you've ever seen? Yes, I do. Yes, I do. Center ice. Because this Canadian has to be hockey related. Wow. So what year did we determine this is? 1980. 1980.
Starting point is 00:05:12 Wow. Maybe shot in 79. Yeah. Shot with one big floodlight pointed at someone. So this is 43, 44 years ago. Is the dog up there? That's the dog, yeah. He just walks into scenarios.
Starting point is 00:05:32 He just walks in. It's Quantum Leap, but with a dog. Does he belong? Does he belong to anybody? No, he does not. He just calls them Snapshot for some reason. The dog would go to different groups and has no relation to any of these people.
Starting point is 00:05:51 So he has a different name depending on who he sees? I don't think it's continuous. It looks like Peter Billingsley from A Christmas Story. It does. It's like the Canadian Christmas Story. Andrew, can I ask you a question? Yeah. Does this kid have AIDS?
Starting point is 00:06:07 No. Oh, okay. No AIDS. But his mom's real mad because he's missing hockey. Whoa! Whoa! What the hell? Oh my god Oh my lord
Starting point is 00:06:32 The other guy's face What the fuck Is it It looks like this kid's about to hit her With a two by four Yeah It's foreshadowing She can barely get the words out Jesus Foreshadowing.
Starting point is 00:06:47 Barely got the words out. Jesus. The coach is like, yeah, she's crazy. Wow. They were like, first takes get enough. Will you be my dad dog? I like that the coach doesn't even wonder where the dog came from. This is okay.
Starting point is 00:07:09 So they didn't have to pay residuals to that coach at all. He didn't open his fucking mouth once. I've noticed that in Dallas a lot. Didn't he say something before the kid showed up? He did. He has one line. He's getting paid. That's all it takes.
Starting point is 00:07:22 He's probably 80 now. Probably still getting checks. I wonder if he's getting a check because we're watching it right now. Fuck no. Nope. Kill her. Add. Kill your mother. Hey, kid, want to find a gun?
Starting point is 00:07:39 So it's like a neighborhood dog. No, he travels the country. Oh, so it's like David Carradine in Kung Fu? Yes. Okay, he's like the Incredible Hulk in the 70s. Yes. Oh, it's for Citibank. What if Macaulay Culkin was just walking the other way?
Starting point is 00:08:02 Two very different adventures. So was that the kid's mom that was so hateful? Yes. She's mad because he likes photography and he's not into skating and he doesn't have courage because he's not playing hockey. Is it looked down upon in Canada
Starting point is 00:08:19 if you don't like hockey or skating? I don't... Normal people, no. Okay. I think his dad died is supposed to be the implication and he was a big hockey player. Super jock.
Starting point is 00:08:33 Super jock, yeah. Yeah. He's just like, I need a place to stay so I'll walk into this bank that's doors open for some reason in the middle of the night. A very well-g groomed dog for being
Starting point is 00:08:46 a little hobo he takes care of himself is that the music or is he got a bag full of balls he stole all of their silverware it's neither Gavin you're about to see what it is it sounds like he's about to rob a bank
Starting point is 00:09:12 it's Andy Dufresne the dog's gonna go get his gun help him out at what point do you just stop and like leave like I would not be continuing to pursue whatever this is i would have looked at the doors made of wood and turned around is this kid gonna see a bank robbery happening it's very possible but if he does at least a hobo is here to help him why did you pick this specific episode
Starting point is 00:09:46 because it's wild it is an insane episode had you seen it before this uh you decided for it uh yes oh shit they are robbing a bank that guy got danger pay The green stuff The green stuff Is this show supposed to be American? I No I don't think so But I mean you wouldn't call your money the green stuff
Starting point is 00:10:18 Well I There was a time in which it wasn't colored in the same way Oh really? Oh I didn't know that How are they getting sparks out of a concrete brick? Well, there was a time in which it wasn't colored in the same way. Oh, really? Oh, I didn't know that. How are they getting sparks out of a concrete brick? Did he kill his dad? What's happening? You're ill.
Starting point is 00:10:35 Foreshadowing. What if that's his dad? What if that is his dad? He thought he was dead this whole time. That'd be a hell of a twist. Oh, my God. See how he was whistling there to distract the kid? If it were me, it would have been the A-Team theme song. Quick, weld him, Jimmy.
Starting point is 00:10:56 We're gonna weld your mouth shut. Hobo just observing. Someone pet me? Oh, here he goes. He's a tails wagon he approves I hate children oh dog
Starting point is 00:11:12 cam you love a show with the dog cam I love dog p.o.v. too much like work. He has a slim jim in his pocket. He's trying to be sneaky. He's trying to untie the kid. Come on, hobo.
Starting point is 00:11:37 You can do it. Nope. Did the show end because London died? I don't know why. I assume ratings. I'm sure if you go to later seasons, the dog's called Paris or something. Starring London 2.
Starting point is 00:12:02 I don't know why they're trying to weld through brick. It's a great point they're just like cutting a hole through the back of the vault that's the Sam Fisher dog right there knows where the shadows are oh he's getting out is the kid gonna choke him with the rope he's like hey
Starting point is 00:12:24 come on. Let's get out of here. Bye. This dog is sneaky. Oh, it's a very sneaky dog. He's well-traveled by this point. I bet this dog's good at Hitman. Oh, he's great at Hitman.
Starting point is 00:12:43 It's also such a weird design for what should be a bank yeah yeah it's like uh it's like they had a set somewhere and just started putting pieces up and went bank they got a free night at the leisure center how many episodes do you think we'd have to watch before we saw this stairwell as something else one other episode there's only one door that's made of chipboard who 80s carnival glass I feel like we're at the point where if you see a building with that in it it should be knocked down by now
Starting point is 00:13:27 really? yeah it probably has asbestos yeah hand in hand there's a lot of the Midwest of America that needs to be knocked down right now unfortunately
Starting point is 00:13:43 oh yeah I'd say about fucking 30% of the houses of America that needs to be knocked down right now, unfortunately. Oh, yeah. I'd say about fucking 30% of the houses I look for, I look at in Michigan, have copious amounts of that shit in it. Oh, shit! Oh, kid! Come on! You suck!
Starting point is 00:13:58 Butterfeet! My glasses! Fucking Velma-ass kid. Get out of here. Oh shit, now he looks like the 2x4 kid. Now it's Kid Cam. Do you guys not have commercials? I assume they were edited out.
Starting point is 00:14:21 We definitely do. But I mean, there hasn't been a place for a commercial break. They don't care. Right? Now, tiny hippos. That's Zoom. This guy's corrupt. Yeah, he's a corrupt cop.
Starting point is 00:14:40 Yeah. Do you think that corrupt cop is his dad? Can't rule it out. This dog. Did he call the littlest hobo Slapshot earlier? Is that what he called him? Snapshot. Oh, because he's a photographer. That makes sense.
Starting point is 00:14:56 And because it said in big text at the beginning. What'd you do that for? Are they on the roof? No, they're in like the entrance where like I guess the bank is being constructed. What the hell's going on?
Starting point is 00:15:11 This kid gets tied up a lot. He's tying the kid up. He's a corrupt cop. That's what you guys call him. ACAB dude, you know. What kind of dog is the little Estobo? I think a German Shepherd, right? I don't know. He looks like part German Shepherd.
Starting point is 00:15:35 I think he's... What's the plan with this cop and this kid? He's seen him. He's going to have to slit his throat later. Jesus Christ. Yeah. I think that's the plan. Maybe they're planning on tying him up and throwing him in the bank
Starting point is 00:15:47 and then pinning the whole robbery on him as some sort of evil boy genius that's why he's always late to practice not a great sentence dummies Not a great sentence. Dummies. For bank robbers, these guys are doing a lot of not robbing banks.
Starting point is 00:16:15 Just a lot of talking in hallways. $18? Slipping all around. Was it a flashlight? I think so. You think he wouldn't have to pay for that though yeah no kidding you feel like they would have filmed that bit
Starting point is 00:16:43 he's yelling he's fucking corrupt. Don't trust him, George. This dog was so fucking smart, why doesn't he learn how to bark English? Idiot. Trapped. Child. Yeah. He said shoe and that worked. My one weakness. that worked.
Starting point is 00:17:03 My one weakness. The dog had like the icon to the men's room on his chin there. Did you see that? No. I didn't. I mean, he's really trying. He's doing his best to help this kid. Oh no! Slowly pan. Slowly pan. Nothing. The kid is gone! Okay, there we go. First commercial break. We're back.
Starting point is 00:17:32 Do you think that commercial was of a tiny hippo? It must have been. Yeah. Fucking cops. I just saw his wiener there it is I like the show I like the dog honestly the dog is great the dog's not getting
Starting point is 00:17:57 he's not stealing the show he's a modest dog this is as good as Mr. Belvedere I think I agree I'd hope so it builds dude It's a modest dog. This is as good as Mr. Belvedere, I think. I agree. I'd hope so. It builds.
Starting point is 00:18:09 Dude, that is a place. He's ringing doorbells? An invisible doorbell? Is he bringing this to the mom that hates her kid? Yes, he is. That is an ugly door. She's going to get there and be like, if you had half the courage, you'd beat up those robbers. Your dad would have slapshotted
Starting point is 00:18:26 them to death why is she dressed from a different century uh i looked it up the littlest hobo is a canadian television series french title le vagabond based on a 1959 well-known movie by the same name. Oh, what? Yeah. Dang. It was on from 1979 to 1985. The concept of the show was that of, quote, an ownerless dog. He's a German shepherd.
Starting point is 00:18:59 That is the dog. Mm-hmm. I'm looking at trivia. This series is a modern day western. Hobo, whose background, origins, motivation, and ultimate destination are never explained, wanders from town to town
Starting point is 00:19:15 and befriends those who need help. At the end of each episode, despite the people he helped attempting to adopt him, he would head off by himself, preferring to be on his own. I'm a loner Dottie a rebel like
Starting point is 00:19:28 so he's Clint Eastwood in like the good the bad and the ugly or whatever where he's like the nameless guy like the blonde guy like he's just going from town to town that's awesome did I bark five times or six what happened to these guys they're gonna do what to my kid fingering it Did I bark five times or six?
Starting point is 00:19:47 What happened to these guys? They're going to do what? To my kid fingering it? Plots ranged from the simple quote, dog helps person story to secret agent type adventures. Yep. In those places. I think they're talking about if they're going to kill the kid or not and the consensus is
Starting point is 00:20:10 yes, we have to kill the kid. Where's the James Brown crossover? Oh, I hope they don't look right. You're fucked. In season 5's two part episode, The Genesis Tapes, a scientist and reporter theorized that Hobo was a type of superior canine.
Starting point is 00:20:32 The reporter theorized that there was one dog, and the scientist theorized that there were up to 100 such dogs. What? What are they doing to him? It's getting serious. Is that how that show Orphan Black happened? Yeah, exactly. So what was the mom saying to follow the dog? She was just like, if he thinks I'm going to back down from being mad at him, there's no way.
Starting point is 00:20:58 Okay. They're going to kill this kid. That's what we're watching. They're going to chuck him down the lift. Throw him down an elevator shaft. Oh my god. Jesus. There's no way this was safe to film. Oh my god. He's right.
Starting point is 00:21:21 Just toss him. Stop talking to it yeah they're gonna kill this kid oh my god man Canada does not fuck around yeah they do not this guy in the blue I stole his glasses okay see oh shit wind now people would believe that he fell down because he couldn't see! Well, at least he won't see it coming. Oh no, a dog bark. Heh! What's happening now?
Starting point is 00:21:53 Oh, hell of a zoom! Oh, didn't stick the landing, but it was a good effort. It's like Grand Central Station over here. This poor kid getting shoved all around. This is manhandled this ball can't get shoved all around this is manhandled he can't see anything I appreciate what Hobo's trying to do here but I don't feel like bringing the mom into this environment is maybe
Starting point is 00:22:21 the best idea kicking her in the box the dog's just gonna get shoved down a different lift shaft to this environment is maybe the best idea. Kicking her in the box. The dog's just going to get shoved down a different lift shaft. They're going to put the glasses on the dog and say, yeah, call the police. Okay.
Starting point is 00:22:39 I followed the dog to this place. I might as well just get through. Oh. Get him, hobo. Bite his dick off. He's going in. He's trying to figure out where the kid is. I was... Unnecessary? unnecessary she's angry
Starting point is 00:23:10 kids stupid dogs stupid tomorrow she's gonna be like yeah I went into this building this stupid cop hung up the phone oh he's gonna throw him down the shaft now
Starting point is 00:23:22 run kid no he can't see shit he can't see shit. He can't see shit. Oh, no! Oh, no! Oh! Oh, save him! Oh, yeah!
Starting point is 00:23:35 He's fucking dead! Get killed! He's fucking dead! Fuck! Hobo kind of killed that guy. Hobo's got a body count. Oh my god, this is amazing. Why would you push someone who's about to fall down anyway?
Starting point is 00:23:50 Anyway. You really want him to fly. But I don't want it to save you either. Nobody ever dies on Mr. Belvedere. They just get AIDS close. Oh no, here comes the backup. I guess no one could get AIDS in this because it wasn't around yet It wasn't around
Starting point is 00:24:09 It was? Yeah it just hadn't made its way to TV yet Oh okay It's like what's happening where's my friend Get him Hobo Get him Oh my god Oh my god Jesus Christ Hob on his head. Oh, he's gonna drop him. No! Oh my god!
Starting point is 00:24:26 Jesus Christ! Almost taken out two of them! That's the greatest thing I've ever seen. I am loving this. My favorite part of this is they establish the kid can't see because they know how traumatizing this would be for a child. Like, they need an out for how he can advance past this the dog is waiting for him to be blinded before he started murdering all these humans
Starting point is 00:24:48 oh shit Jesus guns out oh damn I think hobo killed him yeah he's dead I mean I think Hobo killed him. Yeah. I think he's dead. I mean, that pry bar fell two stories.
Starting point is 00:25:10 Yeah. I mean, Hobo's dead. It's killed people. Hit him in the back of the head. Back of the head's a bad place to get hit by a fucking pry bar. Yeah. In two. Give it to the blind kid. What if he just walks down the stairs?
Starting point is 00:25:25 You do one now. You do one now. He just walks down the stairs and hits his mom. Swing for the fences, Jimmy. You've got to get dirty, too. Half his courage. Now this is courage, kid. Oh, yeah!
Starting point is 00:25:49 In the back? Do you think there was a nail sticking through that board? It has to be. That explained why he went down so fast. I killed two men. This is a Tuesday. Can I have some pets now? Was daddy a murderer? Hardcut
Starting point is 00:26:13 That dog's fucking face at the end is so cool What if the end credits were just that dog eating the bodies? The littlest hungriest hobo oh they're all hanging out they're friends now and they're taking photos the dog's taking a picture great photo too look at that smiling now I'll take a turns
Starting point is 00:26:48 I wonder if there have ever been any real professional dog photographers oh no he's leaving he just keeps going bye hobo wow it's over he's on to the next town oh my god Andrew what the fuck Wow It's over. He's on to the next town. Oh
Starting point is 00:27:06 My god Andrew what the fuck people to kill in the great town over Andrews oh Freight train little hobo This dog was so cool cool it's a great dog he can do anything littlest hobo can do anything he can kill people he can do anything do you think he do you think there's ever an episode where he surfs i don't know i don't think there is from what i've seen but there should be there is by the water a lot if we could get a prop from that i want the the dummy of
Starting point is 00:27:45 the guy that fell down the lift i want the bloody two by four well that was my blind side gavin you're the only one left now with one i hope you guys enjoyed this canadian journey phenomenal television that was i mean wow it's a show what how old were you when you saw that pretty recently for the first time had you never seen the show as a kid no I never grew up watching it but it was something that I'd heard of and looked into
Starting point is 00:28:16 is it a beloved classic does it still play in reruns I don't think it's rerunning anywhere but I'm not sure i haven't like just watched cable that looks like the kind of show i was born in 86 that looks like the kind of show that they would have shown in the middle of the day on nickelodeon in 1991 it looks like a show that like i would have seen it because the quality is like just a guy with a camera zooming in long and that's it it was man wow I love that video look of when that whenever there's a torch or
Starting point is 00:28:53 like a flashlight on screen it leaves a trail across the image that's like that's the shit I grew up watching yep really burning the film well great blindside yeah congratulations andrew you fucking got us that's for sure i do want to do the tony hawk thing like that is a real thing oh yeah you know when i see it yeah we're not falling for that again that's code now gavin do you have any ideas for your blindside uh not currently but that's definitely put the pressure on now that I'm the last. We're running out of time. It resets in the new year, so you gotta try to figure
Starting point is 00:29:29 out something before January. Did we establish that rule? Yeah, we did. So Jeff's out of bullets, now I'm out. Okay. There's a lot of stuff resetting in the new year. We got Nick's mask coming back. That's true. New year, all new bits.
Starting point is 00:29:48 New bits. I will not be bringing little soba back for my second bowl sadly although there's much more to watch but who's to say gavin or i won't that would be a move that would be crazy what if somebody what if somebody blindsided with the same episode like that we gotta watch it again. Miserable. All right, well, there you go. That was a blindside episode two. I hope you enjoyed it as much as we did.
Starting point is 00:30:16 And if you're out there somewhere, littlest hobo, maybe your paths will cross ours someday. We'd love you to swing by the office and solve a little mystery for us. Then somebody else can say something. I mean, that's probably fine. We can just cut there if you want to.
Starting point is 00:30:31 I thought that was a nice ending. Yeah, that was a great ending. Just grab your hat. Come travel light. That's hobo style. That's a better ending, I suppose.

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