F**kface - Award Winning Friendship // Geoff's Admission [133]

Episode Date: December 21, 2022

Geoff, Gavin, and Andrew talk about Andrew's travel to America, the Signal Awards, the 5 way buddyship, Noah's arc, VCK mat, Regulation Animation, our last icy hot, Gurpler Chug Speed, Admission, you ...Brimley'd it, lyric court, Cranteen, and Breakfast Poeppleza. F**kface is nominated for a Signal award? VOTE HERE: https://bit.ly/FFsignal. Want to contribute to bits? Email what you can do to ffacebits@gmail.com. Sponsored by ExpressVPN http://expressvpn.com/face, Shopify http://shopify.com/face, and Honey http://joinhoney.com/face. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Starting point is 00:00:00 Dragon's Dogma 2, the highly anticipated successor to the cult classic Dragon's Dogma, is out now on PlayStation 5, Xbox Series S and X, and Steam. Dragon's Dogma 2 is a third-person action RPG boasting a richly detailed and deeply explorable fantasy world created using Capcom's RE Engine's immersive physics, groundbreaking character AI systems, and cutting-edge graphics. Dive into the vast and dynamic world where The Arisen is called upon to fulfill a forgotten destiny across the nations of Vermont, the Kingdom of Humanity, and Batal, the nation of Beastrin.
Starting point is 00:00:36 Dragon's Dogma 2 revolves entirely around choice. Your choice, that is. From the sword and shield-wielding fighter to fighter to the illusion conjuring trickster, there are over 10 unique vocations to choose from that all require experience to unlock new skills. And character customization is out of this world, literally. Oh, and did I mention the combat is really in-depth? It isn't just hacking at a giant's ankle for half an hour while your dodge roll attacks. You can engage enemies from a distance, climb up large foes, stab them in their weak points, use the terrain and trick, trip, or throw foes off high cliffs or raging waters.
Starting point is 00:01:10 Visit dragonsdogma.com to buy the game and start your epic quest today. That's D-R-A-G-O-N-S-D-O-G-M-A.com to learn more. Hello! I am interrupting, I believe, the start of an episode because this is, we recorded this ahead of time. We got nominated for a People's Signal Award as the best buddy podcast,
Starting point is 00:01:32 I believe, which is absurd. We're excited about it. We've never been nominated for an award before, so I'm here to talk about it and ask you to please vote for us
Starting point is 00:01:41 if you wouldn't mind. It would be, to have an award-winning face would be hilarious. On top of the fact that it is we're winning for the best buddy category, which is an all-time flex to tell anybody in my life I'm an award-winning friend. So please, if you wouldn't mind, I'm sure there are links in the show notes. Give us a vote. We would really appreciate it. Thank you.
Starting point is 00:02:02 Have a great day. Enjoy the episode. This is a Rooster Teeth production. Hello and welcome to another episode of the F*** Face Podcast. My name is Jeff Ramsey. With me, as always, Andrew Panton and Gavin Free, in no particular order, as long as they're behind me in that order. This is episode 133. Hello. Hello. This is... Sorry. I was just thinking. I just realized after we're recording today,
Starting point is 00:02:40 I have to do something between episodes quickly when we stop. Places to be? I'm back. No, not places to be. I just, I realized I'm supposed to chug a thing of Bovril, and I don't have that, so I'll quickly put that together. You talked that up massively last episode. I did, and I need to deliver on it.
Starting point is 00:02:58 I got my Gerpler. It's now here. I'm now back. I'm back in my comfortable situation that I'm used to. No longer in a different country. It's an my comfortable situation that i'm used to no longer in a in a different country it's an exhausting trip i'm glad you listened to the additional 12 minutes of forensics we had to do after you left the last episode no i didn't why did you need to do forensics it's clearly there did you not think i was there oh just listen just listen we put our sleuthing caps on
Starting point is 00:03:25 really okay well if you didn't if you didn't think i was there which it sounds like you guys didn't then how would i have the photos uh 12 minutes of uh in detail yeah you did okay like uh like like nick says uh they they thought about adding us to the CSI family. Hey, Eric, did you submit us to any other awards or just that one? I nominated us for the Signal Awards for Best Buddy, but I don't remember. I must have submitted us to something else a while ago. Okay. But we are nominated for the best buddy category best buddy podcast at the signal awards well we can't win though they're never gonna read out on name
Starting point is 00:04:09 that's no here's the that's why we have to win andrew just keeps saying we need to be the award winning face podcast yeah here's the thing eric i fucking love that you put us in the buddy category first of all because that means that is a flex. If we win this award, we haven't even really mentioned on the show. We are nominated for a single award in the best buddy category. I'm sure there will be links in the show notes. Please vote for us because I want to be able to flex in every relationship. I have every friendship.
Starting point is 00:04:40 If there's an argument to once we win an award for best buddies we've received an award in friendship how many people have awards in friendship right any argument you have with anyone be like oh are you an award-winning friend i don't think so i think i'm in the right here we are gonna be award-winning friends that is well assuming we win, that is like the greatest accolade I could think of. There's layers to this. One, there is an award ceremony in January. So if we win, just the concept of somebody at an award show having to say f*** face is very funny.
Starting point is 00:05:16 Are you going to be that to accept? You know, I just came back from Austin, so I got to look and make sure. Maybe you have some travel miles built up. I could get a discount. We'll find out. I'll have to look into that. But also to just be
Starting point is 00:05:28 an award winning f*** face is so stupid. It's so dumb. I love it. It'd be amazing. It would mean so much to us. I generally don't like speaking beyond myself but I think we can all agree it would be amazing to have. Don't speak for me. Love to win this. How dare you.
Starting point is 00:05:43 So what? people can vote? Is that what it is? Yeah. I think so. It's a public vote. I feel like I covered that, but... What do you mean, Gavin? Did you like your call to action? Well, no, we haven't recorded.
Starting point is 00:05:54 I think I'm going to do that after this, maybe, to throw on the start of the next episode. At this current moment, we have 81% of the vote, so I feel pretty good about it. It's such a weird concept. But we're getting... It's just everyone asking their audience just to vote it's basically like who has a real who has that whose audience has more free time well it's also it's a strange thing too because i don't
Starting point is 00:06:16 think i think there's some bigger shows in the category so it's we need a larger percentage and also there is a former what was john casich jeff there is a former... What was John Kasich, Jeff? Is he a governor? He was a... John Kasich was a governor, I believe. Yeah, he was the governor of Ohio, right? Maybe. He's a Republican governor, I believe.
Starting point is 00:06:34 Doesn't really matter. Governor of Ohio. Yeah. Yeah. So we're up against a podcast, Gavin, in the buddy category that is from a former... He's familiar with getting people to vote. We got some competition. I always feel he's familiar with getting people to vote we got
Starting point is 00:06:45 some competition hey I always feel so weird trying to get people to vote but this is this would be so funny oh it's yeah it would be hilarious but I think I feel like it's important to point out that at the end of the day it's an honor just to be nominated which we did ourselves really yeah actually in this case, it is, because it's the best buddy award, or whatever, I don't remember the specific wording, but to be nominated is pretty good as well. That's also a flex. I was nominated for a friendship award.
Starting point is 00:07:15 Doesn't quite have the weight of winning one, but it's something. We get a little mileage out of that. So is this specifically our three-way buddy ship, or is there a group of two within the three? Or the five, I guess. No. The head of the game.
Starting point is 00:07:28 No, it's the five-way buddy ship. The five-way buddy ship. It's the five-way. Yeah. Absolutely. We got a full ship. It's a full ship. It's like Noah's Ark of comedy.
Starting point is 00:07:36 Yeah, and friendship. If you were an animal in Noah's Ark, what animal would you choose to be? A fish. Yeah? Oh, they're sneaky. Yeah, I think I would be... I think I'd be a dolphin. I'd be something that could get the fuck off that boat and wouldn't drown.
Starting point is 00:07:57 Did he take the fish on the boat, or did he just hope that they'd be fine not getting washed away? I don't know. That's a great question. I think I'd be a llama. I don't know. That's a great question. I think I'd be a llama. I don't know the fuck with llamas. I feel like
Starting point is 00:08:12 whenever I see them in open ranges of grass, they're just kind of hanging out. They're walking around. It seems like a pretty low-key, not stressful life. Nobody's hunting you for your meat, at least not in a general sense. I've never been to a grocery store without a llama. I don't think there's hunting you for your meat, at least not in like a general sense. I don't think there's hunting taking
Starting point is 00:08:27 place on the Ark. I think Noah's got all that settled down. He's fed everyone. The Ark is just for a time, Gavin. We're eventually going to return to the land and live a life. So the question is, what animal do you want to be? I guess, yeah. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:08:43 There was an uneasy truce for 40 days and 40 nights, and the second they got off that boat, the lion turned around and was like, you're fucked. That's a great point, but if there is a mutiny, nobody's coming for the llama first. That's going to be a mid-pack animal. They're going to eat
Starting point is 00:08:59 your ass first. You're going to be grilled up immediately in a food shortage. You're delicious. be grilled up immediately in a food shortage. You're delicious. Grilled up. You know, if you think about it from a literal standpoint, that Noah dude, according to the Bible or whatnot, he took a boy and a girl animal from every species on Earth and put them on a boat together, right?
Starting point is 00:09:22 Uh-huh. A, nobody talks about what that smell would have been like. I can't imagine. Oh, God. It's been a couple seconds just thinking about that. But B, can you imagine how pissed off that Noah dude would be now if he's like, why did I save all these animals if you're gonna let most of them go extinct?
Starting point is 00:09:40 Do you imagine if it was like a fairy? A fairy? Yeah, like, matter well because there's countless animals there's so many animals and jeff brought up the point one of each the idea was that they would repopulate the whole story is absurd could you imagine taking a boat somewhere and there are thousands of animals simultaneously fucking while you're just trying to get somewhere yeah terrible this is an awful experience it sounds like a terrible... How did Noah keep his sanity in the concept that this is real?
Starting point is 00:10:08 How long does it take rabbits to reproduce? Ooh. I've always thought Noah was a mug. He looked at the problem all wrong. He took full-sized animals. He took fully grown animals. If he'd taken babies, male and female, each baby,
Starting point is 00:10:26 he would have saved so much space, and he probably wouldn't have had to deal with an ark. Yeah, but then they wouldn't have their grown-up animal counterparts to teach them the ways of eating animals. It's all instinct. It's instinct. Well, maybe. I will say, I checked it.
Starting point is 00:10:38 The gestation period for rabbits is 29 to 35 days. So they may have started with two rabbits, but I guarantee you they didn't end with two on that boat. Oh, absolutely. Do you think once a week Noah had to just pop in and drown? Maybe rabbits were the food they all ate. He's like, as long as there's two left, we get off the boat, we're fine.
Starting point is 00:10:59 The idea that it becomes like a prison-like gang war of like space, of like each animals had to make their different groups and clans and fend off for themselves with the boat it sounds terrible this sounds like you know all the stuff that's all the animals are going to be excited to get off like the lions and the tigers and all that stuff and there's a bunch of shit that's just not going to want to get off the boat oh yeah absolutely certainly not with the tiger on shore waiting for me to get off. Yeah. Also, what about
Starting point is 00:11:27 dogs? Did they have two of every kind of dog? I don't think a lot of them have been bred yet. Yeah, but certainly some of them must have been. I feel confident saying we're the first group of people that have pivoted from John Kasich to Noah's Ark material. What a transition. I don't know
Starting point is 00:11:43 how we got here. How did we get to Noah's Ark? Did you guys know that Noah's Ark has supposedly been found and it's on some mountain in Russia, in Siberia somewhere? I didn't know. I remember reading about that like 20 years ago,
Starting point is 00:11:58 but they think they found it. And it was in like some... I feel like... Was he drunk? Yeah, he crashed it. He crashed it on a mountain. Hey, you know what? What's that?
Starting point is 00:12:09 What? You know what's phenomenal? What's phenomenal? Oh! You got the foot. The Vancouver Childkicker keyboard pad thing. House. You could live in that thing.
Starting point is 00:12:22 You could. It works. An absolute treat. It's definitely lower quality than my previous mouse mat uh the edges aren't sort of hemmed in so they're gonna start fraying and uh it stinks but other than that it's really effective what does it smell like yeah just like gammy rubber i don't know i couldn't i couldn't figure out which way was best to have it uh i had it both ways but this having it pointed to the left gave me more mouse room so i thought that's that's gonna be the way even though it's it leaves you a bit of a gap
Starting point is 00:12:57 towards you yeah it looks good so do you sign off on this as a product we could sell yeah but i do think we should do it properly. Okay. Yeah, like make it well. Did we ever discuss like how the fuck this happened and why we have it in the first place? I don't think so. The last episode, I think.
Starting point is 00:13:16 Didn't we? I got two radically different answers. Yeah, we had completely different responses. I don't think we... We talked about how Tony was sending us the rug samples. Oh, I don't remember that at all. They made a giant rug out of mouse pad material. I don't think this was
Starting point is 00:13:31 intended to be a mouse pad, right? No. Absolutely not. And it wasn't something we ordered. They just sent it. But the fucking... One look at it and I can tell you that it's a fucking winner. Yeah. It's not perfect, but you know, it's an accident.
Starting point is 00:13:49 What size shoe do you think that would be? 60. 60. Yeah, it's a size 60 for sure. That's funny. What was the fake number that I made up? It's that many. 67, right? I almost said it out loud when you asked
Starting point is 00:14:09 whoa I caught myself I caught myself but I almost that would have been great if you uh I don't know when office material uh is gonna come out in relation to this so I don't know if you should mention what that is.
Starting point is 00:14:25 Yeah, it'll come up. What do you mean? I think that was the new outcome. Was that in the best of 2022? Yeah, it was. Okay. It was the best of 2022. We did a best of 2022.
Starting point is 00:14:33 We did our fall draft, which, you know, bumpy start, but I think overall went very well. I thought it went very smooth. I don't know what bumps you're talking about. We figured it out. We had a little bit of confusion somehow at the start of the process,
Starting point is 00:14:47 but we worked through it. I will say, I think you should probably, for people excited about that, expect to experience it almost like a watch-along, I would say, like the MVP2 thing or what was the other one, the tuxedo. It's a lot of us reacting to clips, and I'm sure we'll compile
Starting point is 00:15:05 them in some way for people to watch along as well gavin posted the uh the picture of a very disgruntled eric he was having a i had to i had to stop and take a picture he he was like panting and his hair was all all over the place and he looked a little bit clammy i think that might have been one of the worst days of eric's year it was not good that was exceptionally funny i'll say this i saw him age in the room yeah i just everything that came up was already taught was what i had brought up. And then you guys brought after agreeing, like going with it with Andrew getting in the room and then going, I don't know what's happening. And it's like,
Starting point is 00:15:51 I don't, I don't know what else I can do. Like, uh, are you saying that a man has a limit? Are you saying that you don't like it when stuff gets brought up and then nothing happens? I'm saying that I brought it up and I know what you're driving at.
Starting point is 00:16:07 I'm not going there. I am saying that I brought it up. Everyone was fine and told me I was wrong when I brought it up. And then when it was go time, everyone for 40 minutes went, I don't know. What are we? So what's the pool? Fuck. Fuck.
Starting point is 00:16:26 Eric, you by any chance see the most recent episode of Regulation Animation? Was that the bicycle one? Yep. Yeah? What do you think of the end? They didn't bleep it again? Do you love it? No.
Starting point is 00:16:42 They did not bleep it. Yeah. Are you feeling pretty good about it too are you the one who gets to message people and go hey what happened do we have to have a meeting about this or is that you or no it's me great yeah no i love it yeah no exceptional oh shit it's time for... God. We should mention, by the way, these regulation animations are coming out every week. Are they on YouTube or just on the RT site?
Starting point is 00:17:13 They are. So they're on YouTube and on... F*** Face YouTube channel and the Roosh Teeth site. I think there's probably three or four of them out by the time, maybe five by the time that this airs, and they're just delightful. I love them. I and they're just delightful. I love them. I think they're so funny.
Starting point is 00:17:26 The things they've added through the animation I think provide so much to the story. The ending could be better, but... I agree with you. 100% on the same page with you, Gavin. Absolutely. Why don't we just get rid of it in general? I don't think we even need that part. Or at least do a different one every time. It's the same one.
Starting point is 00:17:46 Oh, Kevin. These conversations that I've had regarding this specifically, I agree with you. I agree with you. Make them fresh then if we've got to have them. I don't know. You want to record one?
Starting point is 00:18:00 What? Just a thing saying check out the episode it came from? Yeah. Okay. All right. we should all record one and then that that'll that'll keep it fresh i'll see if the next one is bleeped and then uh and then i'll go ahead and do it oh i i'll see if the next one bleeped and jump out a window at this point it's never bleeped eric lives in a one-story house he's not gonna fall far
Starting point is 00:18:23 right it's just to hurt a little bit. On my ankle. I'm at 92% now. I will say, if you're on the fence about whether to watch these or not, I don't know why you would be. Just fucking watch them. They're awesome and they're short. But the thing I like about them is that they provide little summaries
Starting point is 00:18:42 of deep lore about the show. Like, if you ever want to know where the Vancouver Childkicker came from, and you don't want to go back and listen 100 episodes back, it's in there, and it's in, like, a three-minute digestible format. Go Go Now is cut down to four minutes from an hour. Wow. And they did a pretty good fucking job with it, right? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:19:01 The bicycle store, all that stuff. It's, like, it's a great little, like, it's a great little primer for old jokes or existing jokes and where they began. They're fantastic. Gavin, I thought you were going a very different direction with that. I said, oh no. What did you think I was doing? I thought you were
Starting point is 00:19:18 bringing up things that said they would be done but haven't been completed yet. The Icy Hot issue that is still lingering. Since the Office Day. That's going to happen today because Eric agreed. You guys made a separate video. Eric was pretty adamant that he wasn't avoiding it. He just didn't have the Icy Hot.
Starting point is 00:19:37 That's true. In that little thing that we recorded, I put it in his hand. So are we doing it now? I have it with me right now. Are we all doing it? I mean, yeah it now? Are we going to do it next episode? I have it with me right now. Are we all doing it? I mean, yeah. If we're all going to do it.
Starting point is 00:19:49 Oh, by the way, can I just say, I don't know how y'all feel about it, but I think these office days are a real home run. We're making some of the best fucking stuff in these office days. We made three videos this week
Starting point is 00:20:00 in the office day that I think are all going to be just delightful. They're so good and they're so productive. And there's just a weird element that's caused by Andrew not being there. When Eric is mad at Jeff or myself, he'll like look at us and like aim the madness at us. When Andrew, when he's mad at Andrew, he just has to blankly like aim all over the room to the point where he's just staring at Nick, shouting at Nick in the background. And Nick's like, you're looking at me, but you're yelling at Andrew, he just has to blankly like aim all over the room to the point where he's just staring at Nick.
Starting point is 00:20:27 And Nick's like, you're looking at me, but you're yelling at Andrew. Nick is right in front of me, like in my eyeline and I'm just yelling at Nick. Nick has to like lean back almost. But it's Andrew taking all the brunt. Oh, god damn. So are we doing this? Do you guys have your Icy Hot? Yeah, I do. I'm ready. But it's Andrew taking all the brunt
Starting point is 00:20:52 Damn so are we doing this yeah, you guys have your icy hot yeah, I do. I'm ready. Okay. Yeah, I'm never doing this This is the end I see hot in the show. Yeah, this is last. We're done. This is the end of this bit I said I would never do this again in here. I'm doing it One two three go or here. I've turned on my camera because I think that there's this thing where I'm trying to avoid this I just didn't have it. I have I see you. I believe you it's here. Let me full screen on this Hey, that's about how much I have okay all right here. We go on the balls. He's got he's scrunching up his face Don't step too far back, Eric. Ah! Put it on my dickhead! Ah! That's gonna suck. Okay.
Starting point is 00:21:32 I'm okay. It's a little menthol-y. It's a little menthol-y. I also don't think anyone else is doing this. I don't believe any of you. Here's my camera. Ah, I should get a camera. Here's my camera here's my here's my fucking icy hot right on my dick hole right on my pee hole
Starting point is 00:21:50 and my left nut I left I'm staying off the right side today because of I don't know that's just where all the fucking gammy oh no crotch rot was oh it sucks oh oh oh god oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, wave and it gets worse and worse and then it's you know you don't know what part about this is I get and then it goes I have now I have the gerbiler I
Starting point is 00:22:27 just want to put my balls in it right now turn your camera on Oh God ma'am I did oh this is terrible fuck why did I bring this up? Why did I do this? I hope to God this is the last time we ever do this. Never again. Never again. Eric's headphones are off. It's now a good time to admit I didn't do it. I can still hear you dipshit. How can you hear me without the headphones? Of course you didn't fucking do it. I can still hear you dipshit
Starting point is 00:23:09 You didn't fucking do it not to be on a steric you have my I see Excused now why did I do it then? God damn it Jeff you are gonna do it when we weren't even doing an episode Well, yeah, I'm always down. I'm always down for stuff. How can you hit me without headphones? I was part of the plan and agreed to not do it, but then I felt bad, so I did it. Fuck!
Starting point is 00:23:35 You're the only one not doing it right now, Gavin! The cold is such a relief, but the hot... Isn't it so bad? It's so much worse than you think it's weird how much i can feel my left ball but not my right ball at all it's weird to be hyper aware of one ball oh nix said something interesting nix said i didn't do it because I had an icy hot incident earlier today. What does that mean? What the fuck is that?
Starting point is 00:24:07 So I had some back pain and I had my wife put one of those giant XL patches on my back and then I forgot. I took it off and I forgot about it and I took a shower and was using a washcloth on said area and then proceeded to use it south of the border. Oh shit, you moved it.
Starting point is 00:24:28 You moved the effect. Yep, directly. Well, basically I needed a spicy icy. Two spicy icies. So you did do it today, Nick. You just did it in a slightly more hardcore way. Just went around back, that's all.
Starting point is 00:24:45 Oh, this sucks. This sucks. Yeah. What are you doing to alleviate, Eric? Are you just riding out? Are you dunking in the Gerpler? Are you airing it out by a window? Okay.
Starting point is 00:24:56 Oh, I'm airing it out. I mean, I'm at a standing desk. I just thought Eric's... Eric's shorts are off and he just showed me his thigh. It is... Ooh! I'm trying...
Starting point is 00:25:17 It's like... You know, like a pinch and roll kind of situation? I'm just doing that, like, non-stop because it feels like that at least almost distracts from oh oh that sucks you're taking it pretty well i think oh it doesn't like you can't no touch fixes it like there's nothing to do that fixes it. It just keeps going. Yeah, it's just time. You just ride the wave of discomfort. It really is like smoking menthols. How weird.
Starting point is 00:25:53 Now, I realize that only three of us are currently participating, but Nick already did today, and we know Gavin did. So can we just have it be it? I know not all five of us did it at the exact same time, but we're done now, right? I don't want to do this anymore. Never again. No, never again.
Starting point is 00:26:09 All right. I didn't want to do it now. Are you glad that we didn't do it at work, Eric? This doesn't make... I was thinking about this yesterday. It still doesn't make any sense to me what Jeff was going to do. What was that?
Starting point is 00:26:22 Why was he going to put it on? I thought we were just all going to do it right there. Yeah, I thought we were doing it then. Why would we do that? We would cut to like an outside broadcast in the middle of the episode. No, but here's the thing, Eric. There's a fear that you would just slip out of this. That you've been avoiding it purposely,
Starting point is 00:26:38 dodging the content, and we had you in a trap. And you're generally muted for most of the show. I thought we fucked up when you're like, nah, nah, we'll do it in an episode so they can hear the reaction. Your reaction is muted most of the time. I was like, we're fucking idiots.
Starting point is 00:26:52 We just let them get away with this. But no, you're honorable. I'll give you the credit. You got it and you did it. I just didn't do it before because I didn't have it. Again, I wasn't trying to weasel out of this. I just didn't have it. I'm on the hot part now.
Starting point is 00:27:02 When does the icy start again? Because I'm back to hot and hot sucks. It's kind of like three minute cycles I feel like. Yeah, yeah. You're a champion, Eric. You did it. Watching you dance around without your pants on, I'm 100% certain you're not faking that. Watching Eric dance around, I've started copying his movements because I'm like, maybe he knows something.
Starting point is 00:27:27 And I'm like, no, he doesn't know anything. We're both stuck in this. It's like, I was trying to copy your leg moves you were doing. I'm like, this isn't helping at all. We're both, there's no help. There's no hope. Yeah. You just got to ride it.
Starting point is 00:27:39 Oh, there really is no respite from this. No, there's no escape. If you're listening to this and you're like maybe i'll do this just don't do this this sucks yeah don't it's not fun don't do this so i think the next challenge would be uh icy hot and then the soda chug at the same time i think you just explode dude speaking of soda chug and Andrew and I have we have been talking about he got his Gerpler and he texted me to tell me he agrees that the speed of chug, which is I've decided is a new unit of measurement. The speed of chug on the Gerpler is is that it's like the throttles wide open. It's insane.
Starting point is 00:28:18 Yeah, I listened to what you said, Jeff. And I was like, I guess that kind of makes sense. But I didn't fully believe it to experience it. It's like a whole new world of chugging has opened since using my Gerbler. So if we decanted an entire can of soda into one, are you saying it would go down a lot faster?
Starting point is 00:28:33 Yeah, that's what I'm thinking. I think the soda chug would be so much more doable. Do you guys remember the old man show? Not the Doug Stanhope one, but the original one where they had that old dude who would wear the suit and drink a whole mug of beer in one gulp and say ziggy zaggy ziggy
Starting point is 00:28:50 zaggy chug chug. He was like famous for it. He could drink all the beer in the world at once. It's like the Gerpler trained you to do that. Ah. Yeah, there he is. Oh, that guy. Yeah. Yeah. I forgot about that guy. I've never seen that guy. I think he's dead now, but... I would assume's dead now. He looks dead.
Starting point is 00:29:06 He looks dead. Well, you can just tell just by the quality of a picture whether the guy is dead, right? Look at how excited the guy in the bottom left is. It's age plus resolution equals death. You look at resolution, and then you look around for m mullets and you think that guy's probably dead. That guy in the bottom left looks like Alec Winters in
Starting point is 00:29:31 the vampire movie. What's that called? Lost Boys. Have you been naughty or nice this year? I don't know where I'd rank potentially going to Austin and not seeing my friends at all. Would that be naughty? It could be naughty, but it's for a bit. I don't know how to rank that.
Starting point is 00:29:51 Anyway, well, you might fool Santa, but you definitely can't fool your internet provider. They've seen all your late night naughty searches this year. That is not the type of naughty I was thinking. I was thinking like a prank, not like the whatever. But you know what? Your business is yours. That's why this holiday season, gift yourself the gift of privacy with ExpressVPN.
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Starting point is 00:33:53 Go to Shopify.com slash face to start selling online today. Shopify.com slash face. I have something, I don't know if I should bring it because we're doing two today. Gavin, do you have a lot of stuff in your notes? I got a funny phone call from Jeff after our office day. Okay, we're going in there.
Starting point is 00:34:17 What happened? It was after the previous recording, wasn't it? It was after the last episode. Episode 132, believe uh i had i'll just say this that episode that episode did my head in a little bit and i got pretty demoralized and i i drove to the grocery store and i sat in the parking lot to just try to kind of what do what okay what happened andrew and eric Andrew and Eric, what do you think happened in the episode that he's referencing? The one where I left early?
Starting point is 00:34:52 Yep. Yeah. Huh. I can't think of what would have fucked you up. Oh my God. The piss smell? I don't know. You went a lot about piss.
Starting point is 00:35:04 My brain 100% broke in that episode what happened i was telling you guys uh i was hyping up a big story this is this is this is in my notes for today it's called admission and that's how i called gavin and i said i need i need i'll say like i said to gavin i need to be honest with you guys about something that just happened in the recording we did in episode 132. I was telling you guys some wacky McDonald's facts that I learned from Emily who was reading Wikipedia one night. And she was mentioning a bunch of stuff. In that, I was really hyping up that Willard Scott was a big time celebrity and it was a big deal. And then it was incredibly demoralizing when you guys didn't know who Willard Scott is,
Starting point is 00:35:47 who, by the way, I still think I get it because you're not American. But I think anybody in America knows who Willard Scott is, hopefully at least anybody over 25. And he's the smuckers guy who. Yeah. And however, I messed up and I said Wilford Brimley. And then I had to correct myself and say Willard Scott. Yeah, that was great.
Starting point is 00:36:07 What actually happened is when I ingested the information, I somehow transposed Willard Scott and Wilford Brimley in my head. And so when I learned it was Willard Scott in the moment, I thought it was Wilford Brimley. This entire time, I thought it was Wilford Brimley. This entire time, I thought it was Wilford Brimley. I have been telling people that aren't you guys that Wilford Brimley invented Ronald McDonald and that he was the original Ronald McDonald. When I went to my own notes, which I copied from Wikipedia and I read them to you guys and I read Willard Scott, I thought, that's weird. I must have mistyped or like what a weird autocorrect. That doesn't make any sense. And I got tongue to you guys, and I read Willard Scott. I thought, that's weird. I must have mistyped.
Starting point is 00:36:46 Or like, what a weird autocorrect. That doesn't make any sense. And I got tongue-tied for a second. So then I was like Googling it. And when I Googled it, Wilford Brimley McDonald's does not come up. Willard Scott McDonald's came up really fast. And I realized it was never Wilford Brimley this entire time. It was always Willard Scott. I completely overhyped this thinking it was Wilford Brimley.
Starting point is 00:37:06 And I spent weeks. I think I told my mom about this. I told people. I told other friends about this. I told Emily's friends. I told Emily's family about Wilford Brimley. I probably told 25 people that Wilford Brimley invented Ronald McDonald. and then I found out in the moment from my own notes that I had my dumb ass just
Starting point is 00:37:27 misread Willard Scott as Wilford Brimley somehow and got it wrong and it just fucked me up in the moment and I didn't know how to recover from it and I just stumbled through it and ended up picking the wrong side because I didn't know how to explain this and then I felt so guilty about it after the episode
Starting point is 00:37:44 I had to call Gavin and... It was such an amazing pivot, though, because I wouldn't have guessed that from based on what happened. No. It's so much more the complicated move when you were like, oh, it's...
Starting point is 00:37:56 You know, you could just be like, oh, I wrote it wrong. Or I remembered it wrong. It wasn't an instance of you've screwed up in one moment. You've had this wrong the entire time. The entire time. Yeah. And I've been passing disinformation on.
Starting point is 00:38:10 And then you're suddenly having to hype up the other guy as though he's as famous as Wilford Brimley. And it's like, I love Willard Scott. Willard Scott is no Wilford Brimley. I recognize and acknowledge that. And boy, talk about being crestfallen in the moment when I realized I had been all excited about Wilford Brimley, I recognize and acknowledge that. And boy, talk about being crestfallen in the moment when I realized I had been all excited about Wilford Brimley and it wasn't him and it was Willard Scott. That's a fucking letdown. And I was dealing with the emotional turmoil of that letdown, plus the embarrassment of
Starting point is 00:38:36 getting it wrong. That's plus like the realization, like as I'm explaining this and trying to like trying to trying to get my foot out of my own ass in front of you guys in the conversation and like pictures of people in my brain are popping up who i told about wilford brimley and it's like oh there's another one oh there's another one oh my cousin and his husband oh there's and i'm just like oh my fucking god it just got worse every second make having to make like the std uh calls like of everyone you've told like yeah in fairness to you if you just look at this photo wilford brimley and someone said this man invented ronald mcdonald i feel like it's very believable you know what in my heart he did
Starting point is 00:39:20 it feels like that's the thing that man could have done i would be unfazed if I didn't know who Wilford Brimley was. And you just said this guy invented Ronald McDonald. I'd be like, yeah, that makes sense. He looks like he in that photo. He looks like he looks like if Panama Jack got diabetes. You this makes so much sense now that you mixed it up for yourself and we had to be the ones to correct you because when you kept hammering how cool it was and then it was Scott I'm like I'm like yeah that is kind of cool but also like and then you got a bit defensive when we were laughing yeah
Starting point is 00:39:56 it was yeah it all makes sense and I I love the phone call afterwards because it was the most one-sided phone call it was it was Jeff basically talking for two minutes i didn't say a single i was just laughing the entire time as he stood out i don't think i said more than like eight words on the whole phone call there was so much build-up to this super celebrity megastar is the creator and willard scott is such a nothing for me i forgot that that was the thing we even talked about in that episode. It already left. What Gavin said after I was finished with my spiel is he said, this is the best phone call I've ever
Starting point is 00:40:32 received. I just couldn't get it off. Oh, what a move. I'm on a mission too. That takes a lot. I was trying to get him to tell me I don't need to tell you guys. I was like, I don't need to mention this on the podcast, right?
Starting point is 00:40:49 This isn't funny enough. And he was like, no, no, no, no. But I was like, it's probably not worth it. And he's like, it's worth it. You got to do it. That's so funny. There's my stupidity laid out bare. Oh, I really hope that that comes back to me in some way.
Starting point is 00:41:02 That like six months from now, I'm going to be somewhere and I'm going'm gonna overhear someone say do you hear wilford brimley and ronald mcdonald like i just hope that misinformation spreads well i think we've basically we've got potentially got a new verb out of that like brimleying it brimley yeah brimleyed it that way what would that be that would be like just when when the core piece of information is wrong yeah and it's on you it's your fault like you were never right i did that once on a podcast i think where i think jeff was on it or it's after a podcast and i i read some info i i found out that like gin was just vodka and i told i told everyone in the room and then everyone's like no you're an idiot uh and then i i realized I just, I think I just dreamt it. I think I dreamt someone being like, do you know that gin is just vodka with like something in it?
Starting point is 00:41:52 And I was like, and I couldn't ever trace back. Like what? At first I thought I'd read it somewhere. So I started Googling it and nothing came up. And I was like, I must've just dreamt it. Forgot it was a dream and just started telling people. And Jeff, you were the one who was like, you're an're an idiot we're talking about i have no memory of that but yeah i fully uh brimley did that you brimley did i feel like that kind of happens with song lyrics
Starting point is 00:42:16 all the time too like just not hearing them correctly and then living for years thinking a song goes a certain way when it's it's not at all dude i do that all the time where i'll just fill in based on what it sounds like and then i'll yeah i'll know i'm not doing it right like sometimes i'll just even replace lyrics with just something insane knowing it's wrong just because i don't know the real lyrics and then i'll look up the real lyrics and i still don't use them like i have some songs where i do sing the wrong thing. That's great. Like that Bon Jovi song. The first line I think is, Tommy used to work on the docks, right? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:42:52 Then some blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. The next verse I always sing is, Gina drank a barrel of AIDS. I don't know why it fits so perfectly. I've just always, that's always replaced the actual lyrics for me. And I can't understand why. It sounds better in your head now, right? Not the actual lyrics.
Starting point is 00:43:14 Have you ever had a situation where like you're doing karaoke and that is fucked to you? Like you've just said what you believe instead of just like that would play so poorly to a group of random people. I would never do karaoke. That'll never be a problem. Yeah, I don't think I've never done it. I don't think I ever should. That's fair. I have that with I don't like Pearl Jam very much, but there's one song I do kind of dig from Pearl Jam and I thought for years the line was like
Starting point is 00:43:36 it's like she lies and says she's in love with him. Can't find the butter man and apparently it's a better man and I figured that out eventually, but I like the idea of a butter man and so i've been saying that i continue to do that that's it's butter bean the name of this song is better man yeah it's like track three or something and when it was on my cd player i don't pay attention to names of songs oh that's so good it's like what's your favorite polo g song
Starting point is 00:44:02 i don't know number three number six and number nine i don't i don't keep that information if i'm not looking at a vinyl i don't need to know it oh do you do that andrew uh yeah i had one very recently with the nickelback song rock star where i completely misheard a section of it and the follow-up lyric which i did remember correctly validated my belief it was the lyric was something like live in hilltop houses driving 15 cars and up until like last week i'd always heard it as live live with a big tough posse driving 15 cars and in my head i was like well you're big big tough posse you got a big posse you're gonna need you're gonna need a variety of vehicles for your posse so that just checks out so if anything it makes more sense than the actual lyric possibly yeah they're all
Starting point is 00:44:48 gonna need to get around i wonder if we could find like if we could just pay attention when we're listening to songs compile a list of all the lyrics that we've gotten wrong and then petition the artists to change them to our lyrics because they're better i don't think bon jovi will do much no i think it's a tough case i like the idea though of like lyric court like a judge joe brown situation where you take an artist to trial over their lyrical usage try to get it changed because you have a better combination of words it's an outrage it's dumb maybe we should ask some of the comment leavers or regulation listeners to come to become comment leavers and see any sort of in-brained lyric changes
Starting point is 00:45:29 that they've done over the years. Yeah, what are your missed lyrics? Sort of unintentional ones. Yeah, I'd love to have that information. Speaking of food stuff, I've elevated. As you guys all know, I'm a desk chef.
Starting point is 00:45:43 Proud of it. I've innovated in the desk chef realm. But we had a conversation. I don't remember if it was last episode or the one before it, where we exchanged Thanksgiving recipes. We did a whole thing about it. And Gavin, who remembered
Starting point is 00:45:58 and did a lot of prep for it, posted a photo of tater tots and cranberry sauce. That was great his great recipe that was my stuffing it was yeah well it was your stuffing but i was thinking as i thought a lot about it it hit me later in the evening that i should take this dish on because i think there's i think there's potential within this dish there's something there for it uh and as a canadian especially i thought i'm qualified for this because i realized in a sense you've just created festive poutine poutine big part of canadian culture you get your fries cover it in gravy you got cheese curds what if what if
Starting point is 00:46:41 a crantine were to exist for the holiday times a tater tot dish with cranberry sauce yeah delicious crantine ointment yeah so i crantine is making my balls burn like crazy right now actually sounds like jock itch medicine no no i don't want that god damn it this is delicious there's potential a potentially delicious dish. So I went out, I got all the things needed for it. I got the homemade cranberry sauce, got some bacon,
Starting point is 00:47:12 mozzarella cheese, and a nice big bag of tater tots. I got the mix going and I made cranty. You're going all out for Christmas. Look at that. Wow. I did.
Starting point is 00:47:23 Oh yeah, obviously. Oh yeah, let's dissect this photo. Alright, let's see. One, two, three, yeah, five Christmas trees. What's that thing in the jug? That's the cranberry sauce. Yeah, but what's the ring in it? So Gavin, I was looking
Starting point is 00:47:38 at that too. Instead of just the measurements on the side that you see on one side, it's just so like when you're looking down at it from the back. It's called a liquid measuring cup. Yeah. It confused the shit out of me. It was like, oh, is that the thing we're not going to talk about?
Starting point is 00:47:53 And then I figured it out. Dude, that is fancy. I've never seen one like that. You've got the fanciest stuff. Oh, it's nice. It's nice. Listen, as a desk chef, I take all cooking very seriously. You've got to have the right tools, the right equipment.
Starting point is 00:48:03 Right. But that's not your desk, though. That is in the kitchen. That's exactly right. I'm saying, but as a desk chef, I take cooking seriously. No matter where the situation is, you got to be prepared. So I put the tater tots on, heated up some bacon, mozzarella, instead of like the cheese curd, homemade cranberry sauce.
Starting point is 00:48:20 And this is, let me introduce you, some crantine. Some delicious crantine crantine gotta mix it all in oh and let me say it was very good it was shockingly good there's room for improvement needs more bacon needs more cheese i was a little bit of worried i was worried about the cheese cranberry mix but it was it was tasty, are you sure you need cheese? Uh, well, if you're going for the poutine effect, I would say you need cheese.
Starting point is 00:48:52 How fast were you moving when you took this photo? What do you mean? I mean, look at the tree behind it. It's pretty, it's like emotional. Yeah. Oh. This is like a Jeff level photograph. Fuck that. No, it's not. It's absolutely get out out of here, Jeff-level photograph. The middle tater tot is totally in focus,
Starting point is 00:49:09 and the tater tot's on the right, where it looks like the jizz is, completely in motion. I agree with Jeff. I agree with Jeff that it looks blurry. This is not a Jeff-level photograph. No, absolutely not. 100%.
Starting point is 00:49:23 100%. Absolutely not. 100%. It just Absolutely not. 100%. It just looks like when I used to overuse radial blur when I first got Photoshopped. No, I just, I'm bad at taking photos. Not Jeff bad, but not great at it. So how do you think that would, how do you think that would sit in a turkey if you were going to try it as stuffing?
Starting point is 00:49:41 No, I think it would be terrible in a turkey. I'm not a, I don't like stuffing in turkey generally but i think as a dish i would actually encourage people to try crantine yeah i think it's surprisingly good so try it as try it as a dressing not a stuffing it's stuffing when it goes in the turkey it's dressing when it doesn't that is just it's a shitload of cranberry though that like i feel like whenever you have cranberry it's like a little dollop it's a lot yeah you're right i was trying to like get the right amount i was trying to match the gravy with cranberry ratio there's definitely things to adjust in it but i was surprised by how good it is it's a great the sweetness with the saltiness of the maple bacon and then you have
Starting point is 00:50:20 the just oh it's good it was good it was shockingly good. But my innovation... Well, that's one for the recipe book. It is. And I got another recipe. My innovation didn't stop there because I, you know, recently... You're going to top crantine? I'm not going to say I'm going to top crantine, but I was in the kitchen, once again, elevating. As we all know,
Starting point is 00:50:39 I just recently returned from Austin at one of my favorite staples of Austin, one of my favorite things I love. And it makes me upset that they're not everywhere. It's breakfast tacos. Breakfast tacos are a fucking joy. I love them so much. They're delicious. They got the crunch.
Starting point is 00:50:56 You got the potatoes in there. It is wonderful. But we don't have them where I live. I've never experienced a great breakfast taco anywhere else. Not that I'm well-traveled, but they certainly aren't here. So I was missing Austin, the place I just left. Stop saying that. Well, we don't have breakfast tacos.
Starting point is 00:51:15 Maybe I can make something, because they're well-established, so I guess we just don't want them for whatever reason. Maybe I could make something else. So I have invented, I don't think anyone's done this before, let me introduce you to the Popolza, the breakfast Popolza. This is a tortilla
Starting point is 00:51:35 fitting in the same tradition as the breakfast taco. You got your ketchup as the red sauce, got some olive oil for cooking the food. You got hash browns in place of cheese on the pulpoza. And then some pineapple, because I love it's my favorite pizza taco. What are you calling it? It's a pulpoza. A breakfast pulpoza.
Starting point is 00:51:57 Potato pineapple pizza. Breakfast pulpoza. What does it have to do with being a taco? Well, because it's a breakfast taco. We don't have breakfast tacos where I live. So fucking make one. You've got a tortilla right there.
Starting point is 00:52:10 Put eggs in it and you've got a breakfast taco. Why is the cheese replacement hash browns? Because it's shredded. It has a very cheese-like... That's what it is? That's the thing that you think replaces it? It's shredded? Yeah, it's shredded hash browns.
Starting point is 00:52:24 I don't think you could buy potato in a carton yeah he's like dehydrated hashbrowns he's like i really like breakfast tacos so i decided to make a pizza no listen you're not listening to me jeff the breakfast taco has been around for a long time we have not adopted the breakfast taco we clearly do not want the breakfast taco. We clearly do not want the breakfast taco. If we wanted the breakfast taco, it's been around long enough and established enough, it would be here. So I'm trying to make an alternative to the breakfast taco that might catch on
Starting point is 00:52:56 because we don't have a breakfast pulpaza. So it's almost like tricking people into having breakfast tacos. I'm trying to get something close to it, and this is my creation, the breakfast pulp. So it's a simple start. You get your tortilla shell. You put it down.
Starting point is 00:53:10 Drop some ketchup in it. Spread it out just like a pizza. It's like we're going with a pizza base here. Eric, would you say that's too much sauce? I mean, it's ketchup, so yeah. Really? You know what? You know two great flavors that go great together?
Starting point is 00:53:25 Ketchup and pineapple. This is insane. It's a red sauce. Andrew, this is like, this is really something else. No, just wait a second. We're going to have access to nice pizza sauce. That's ketchup. Yeah, because it's hash browns.
Starting point is 00:53:41 Ketchup and hash browns are a great combination. It's delicious. And pineapple. Okay,'s delicious. And pint. Okay, keep going. And tortilla. Pineapple's my favorite. So you get the tortilla. You put the sauce down, right?
Starting point is 00:53:50 That's step one. Then you cook the hash brown, and you lay it out, and it looks just like shredded cheese. You got a nice shredded cheese base. You look like you got a cheese pizza, but it's a pulpaza. It's a breakfast pulpaza. So you get that going.
Starting point is 00:54:06 Then you cook up the bacon. This is where I made my mistake. What I should have done is I should have heated the tortilla first. Because you want it brown so you got a crunch. And it also helps with the durability. Like holding the weight. Because you don't want just a loose, like not cooked tortilla. It will not hold. So you get that on.
Starting point is 00:54:24 I did it in the wrong order i did that last that should be the first eric is livid this this is the craziest fucking thing no this is so out of control like i don't even know andrew it's like it's like an alien saw food and then tried to make it based this is crazy this is so fucking nuts i just want a breakfast taco and it's not oh my god and listen i was remit eric i was reminiscing about my time in austin i was missing the breakfast tacos and so i had to clearly clearly never been to austin or seen a breakfast taco in person oh no i've had several i love them that's one of my favorite things to get i don't know how you got from there to this. I explained it.
Starting point is 00:55:06 I know you said you made a mistake with the tortilla. Can you keep going? Because I have to see how the pineapple plays into this fucking minstrel. Absolutely. So the next step is you got to get your bacon going. You cook your bacon and you put it on with the pineapple. You get it on top. So now you look like, look at how delicious that looks. You got the salty with the sweet. You got the ketchup with the pineapple. You get it on top. So now you look like, look at how delicious that looks.
Starting point is 00:55:25 You got the salty with the sweet. You got the ketchup with the potatoes. Everything's enhancing each other. The problem is that is not a cooked tortilla shell at all. It's just, it's going to be difficult. After a lot of difficult moving from the plate to the oven, I cooked it and this is the final result look at this look at how fucking delicious this looks nice and crispy around the edges you got your pineapple you got
Starting point is 00:55:54 your bacon the sweetness the ketchup and honestly eric not enough sauce that's one of my other things it needed more ketchup it lacked lacked ketchup. Probably needs cheese. I like the one thing that's so easy to add at the end of cooking is you didn't put it on. Well, it just felt weird to put on top. It felt like it needed to be below. That would be weird. What you've created is a Hawaiian pizza for lactose intolerant people. No, no, listen.
Starting point is 00:56:25 It's got everything you need when you start your day. You got some carbs with the potatoes. You got the bacon. You got some fruit. Get that vitamin C, I'm assuming. What does pineapple have? Is it vitamin C? It's got to have something good in it.
Starting point is 00:56:38 It's a good start to your day. Wake up, get a breakfast pulpaza, and just start your day. Here, I cut it. I bet your piss would be smelling pretty good after that. Yeah, you have two of these? Great smelling piss. Had to take a little cut, a little slice,
Starting point is 00:56:51 a little slice of the pulpaza. All in all, pretty fucking good. Don't eat that. The first bite you take from that, it's going everywhere. I want to see what's under you after you finish eating that. No, no, no, no. You hold it the right way. There's a technique to it, but I think if I were to do what's under you after you've finished eating that. No, no, no, no. You got to hold it the right way. There's a technique to it.
Starting point is 00:57:06 But I think if I were to do the tortilla first and really get that crunchy, reduce some of the hash browns, probably get rid of the pineapple and put some cheese on there. That's a great breakfast pizza. What if you just put a little dollop of crontine on top? How do you think that would go? That would be way too much. That's not a good balance of flavor.
Starting point is 00:57:26 But the sweet and salty, you guys are reluctant to this. I'm gonna, I'll put one of these together for you. You're gonna see the way. I'm not a big ketchup guy, I'll be honest. No, I'm with Gavin. And also, how do you spell pulp, pulp, pulp, pulp, pulp? Here, it's easy. Let me, I'll
Starting point is 00:57:42 just copy and paste and drag it over. Couldn't just say it out loud, but. Well, no, it's easy let me i'll i'll just uh copy and paste and uh drag it over uh couldn't say it out loud but oh no it's uh i'm gonna you know i'm just gonna put it here so you can see it instead of spelling out loud that's not how i wrote okay breakfast i'm glad i asked hey jeff is that how you would have spelled that no it is not that is not how I would have spelled it. However, I guess it'll go in the cookbook like that. Absolutely. Poet pleasure. Listen, I think there's a lot of innovation.
Starting point is 00:58:12 I'm just, I'm excited. I'm a desk chef. I got into the real kitchen because I felt this needed it. I couldn't use the tools I have. There's a lot of room here. I was expecting a better reaction from you. I thought you'd be excited about the crantine and the pulp is up, but I was excited about the crantine.
Starting point is 00:58:28 I think the pulp is an affront to food. Really? Why? Yeah. What about it? Because of the ketchup and pineapple. Also, because you described it as missing a breakfast taco and then left out the
Starting point is 00:58:40 most important ingredient in breakfast tacos, which is 100% always egg. Yeah, but unless you're getting a, can we talk about the egg thing for a minute? the most important ingredient in breakfast tacos which is 100 always egg yeah but here's unless you're getting a can we talk about the egg thing for a minute because the egg has been so this has been a problem in my life for a while now as we we established on this show i don't think i've ever just had an egg before i know i've had egg and other things like i'm sure i've had some in like fried rice but i've never tried scrambled eggs and And you were like, I'm going to make you scrambled eggs.
Starting point is 00:59:07 So now it feels like a content thing. And there have been so many times. How long have we been doing this? For two and a half years? Where I am in a position to have eggs and want eggs and say, no, I'm not going to have eggs because I feel like it's a content thing. I feel like I need to do it in a contact content situation so that's why there are no eggs eggs are not a part of my life because i feel that will be a content thing that
Starting point is 00:59:30 you're part of this is unreal i'm struggling to look at the poples uh and consider getting it down for dinner i can't imagine having it for breakfast. Can you imagine those flavors in your mouth right when you wake up? I will say, I hate to fucking say it, but your egg explanation makes sense to me. I don't. I agree. Yeah, it's for content. What's the content thing at this point?
Starting point is 00:59:57 No, hang on. Hang on. Hang on. I agree with the spirit. Hey, I agree with the spirit of what he's saying. But what the fuck are we releasing? It's just filming Andrew eating eggs. We just recorded a five minute thing of you not putting on Icy Hot.
Starting point is 01:00:17 What the fuck are you talking about? How is that lower than that? Right, Andrew. We watched a monkey movie. What are we doing? That's bad and we shouldn't have done it. No, I think it's great. This Best Buddy Award is out the window. Season 5 Andrew
Starting point is 01:00:32 is so much angrier than season 1 and 2 Andrew. I love it. He's saying I won't eat eggs because we're going to film me eating eggs? No, I'm not saying film, but I feel like it was talked about it was part of the show like i feel like that's a thing like life on the show life sometimes becomes content and it or might
Starting point is 01:00:53 have the potential of content so yeah i can see it uh i think that's valid i think this is all valid i think this is i'm not shocked because innovation is often scoffed at initially. It might be a little bit ahead of the curve for your palates, but you'll see. I'm going to convert you both. The words that came out of your mouth, Andrew, you're a little bit surprised at our reaction to that. Well, I would like to point out your reaction to my plowman's. That's what I was about to say. This motherfucker is coming at me for my pizza when he put onion and egg on his.
Starting point is 01:01:25 He put pickle in the crust. Yeah, but you know what? You know what? He called it a pizza. It is. That's the za part of the pulpaza. It's a breakfast pulpaza. But you wanted a breakfast taco
Starting point is 01:01:38 and you made a pizza. Stop saying pulpaza. Stop saying pulpaza. It's a breakfast pulpiza stop we can change the name if you want I mean I'm not married to the name the name is the best part of it honestly
Starting point is 01:01:52 you'll see when you come over for whenever we do the bachelor party crabbing thing I'll bring you guys some pulpizas and you'll see the way you're coming to America in February for the Olympics, dude. Yeah, but I'm, you know, that's a foreign kitchen. I don't know. We'll have to see.
Starting point is 01:02:10 We have so much to do when we get to Canada that we're going to have to actually go soon. Otherwise, we're going to have to be there for a month. We have to start checking stuff off. I haven't figured out how to pack a pulpaza, but I'll figure it out. I'll come up with a way. Maybe saran wrap.
Starting point is 01:02:26 That could work. God, speaking of food, I came up with an idea for a... Actually, I came up with an idea for like a gross food game yesterday. And then when I was trying to put it together last night, I pivoted into a totally different idea.
Starting point is 01:02:38 But I don't think we have time to do that this episode. Yeah, let's do that in the next episode. We can wrap this one up and then we'll start with that one and do... How's Let's do that in the next episode. We can wrap this one up and then we'll start with that one to do. How's everybody's balls doing
Starting point is 01:02:48 except for Gavin? Way bad. Mine are fine. Yeah. Oh, mine feel good. It feels like when you get done working out and everything is like,
Starting point is 01:02:57 okay, I can relax now. Yeah. It's like nothing's, nothing on my body is like scared anymore. Everything is okay. Well, there you go. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:03:06 Eric's balls are no longer scared. And with that, you have completed listening to an episode of the podcast. Number 133. Not the longest podcast we've ever done. Probably not the shortest either, but definitely one of the best. Maybe. And look out for best of 2022 supplemental. Yep. Yeah. Yeah. And look out for Best of 2022 Supplemental. Yep.
Starting point is 01:03:27 Yeah, yeah, absolutely. It should be out soon. We also have the Fall Draft coming out. I don't know if the pizza videos are out yet or not, but boy, they were entertaining to watch and proof. And, uh, oh, they are? Okay, Eric, so they are. So go ahead and look for those if you haven't watched them already, and don't forget to vote for us in the Academy Awards
Starting point is 01:03:43 or the Grammys or whatever it was and we'll see you next week. Eric, are you putting anything at the end of the pizza video or is it just going to come out? I don't know what you're asking. There's two things. What are the ends
Starting point is 01:03:59 like? Thanks for listening. Goodbye! Hey guys, Major League Fan Jack here with a like you have a listening goodbye hey guys Major League Fan Jack here with a look at next week's episode of face and continues to stun the crew who puts
Starting point is 01:04:15 cucumber in a bag anyway Gavin's co2 troubles return Jeff talks about his Christmas tiny town which holiday is the best and once again Andrew does not eat the pencil.
Starting point is 01:04:26 All that and more on next week's episode of F*** Face.

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