F**kface - Gavin Loves Skype // Andrew Stole Chips Maybe? [142]

Episode Date: February 22, 2023

Geoff, Gavin, and Andrew talk about the Friendervention, Gavin is muted, fridge magnet, Skype forums, loud restaurant, Geoff's power, the bag grew, Warzone tiny snort, can ketchup be warm, Does It Do?..., scheduling an office day, Geoff opens Emily's presents, Andrew's chips, Comment Leaver's Gavin lifehacks, nostalgia, the laughtrack, Gavin's therapy selfie, butter chicken, Survivor, and PRANK WARZ PAX 2009. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Starting point is 00:01:10 Visit dragonsdogma.com to buy the game and start your epic quest today. That's D-R-A-G-O-N-S-D-O-G-M-A.com to learn more. This is a Rooster Teeth production. Why did Gavin join and he's muted? Who cares? Great. You said things are better.
Starting point is 00:01:42 Hello. Hello and welcome to another episode of the F*** Face Podcast. My name is Jeff Ramsey and with me as always, Gavin Free and Andrew Panton. Uh, hello boys. Hello. Gavin is shy, he's still muted. I don't know what's going on. Well this is perfect because Gavin and I were supposed to have a friend-tervention, a friend-intervention. Uh, we teased it up last one, so we'll just have it right now.
Starting point is 00:02:05 I'll kick it off. Gavin, what the fuck? Your response. He left. He left the call. He left. Yeah, he's gone. He's not here anymore. I clearly won that argument. Congratulations, man. He's back and muted.
Starting point is 00:02:22 Is Gavin late at this point? I would say he's late yeah i wonder what his argument is that he's not here well let's let's get hold on a second let's say gavin we feel like you're being deficient in your duties of of podcast participant and host as well as a friend would you care to respond i think that's pretty clear that's pretty old i think at this point he's late yeah no he No, he's definitely late. Yeah. He just he doesn't care.
Starting point is 00:02:48 Oh, he just posted a photo of his computer. I had that. Your Discord installation is corrupt. Wow. Well, imagine if you would have had some pleasantries and noticed that before we started. So we wouldn't launch into this. Hey, before Gavin gets here, do you want to do you want to have a little bit of a merch meeting um i could actually it'd be great to have your opinion on something yeah i i i uh i'll say i
Starting point is 00:03:14 missed the the most recent merch meeting uh i apologize to everybody who i've blown off or missed in the last week my life has been a fucking nightmare yeah you're pretty yeah you're yeah you're in a fuck situation. Don't worry about it. Here's what we said with Tony. We said, Tony, merch meeting. Want a fridge magnet? A magnet of Jeff's fridge that you can put on the fridge. And he said, okay, do you want it to open?
Starting point is 00:03:35 And we said, what? Excuse me? And Tony just sent us this. What the fuck? We can have magnets that open? Yeah, I guess that's the thing. We said, if that can happen, we should have one Cosmic Crisp apple in it. Oh, that's beautiful.
Starting point is 00:03:50 Dude, we have to make this. We have to make this. Yeah, that was such a dumb idea, but man, leave it to Tony to make a bad idea good. Yep. That's phenomenal. That deserves to be made. Absolutely.
Starting point is 00:04:04 I'm letting them know right now this rules let's do it so let's find out let's find out how many we can how many we have to make and then we'll just communicate that number to the audience immediately yep hey what's up guess who's using the browser oh your browser boy oh there's two of us now. Well, my actual discord just said it is corrupt. What's can we not use shitty ass dog shit held as discord? What do you mean? If you just show up five minutes early, this isn't a problem. Works great for me.
Starting point is 00:04:36 I'm using it right now. What do you what do you want to use instead? Do you care? Like, do you want me to find something else? I can find something else. No, don't listen to him. Cool thing about discord is it's accessible via multiple platforms. You want to get it on the browser?
Starting point is 00:04:49 You can get it on the browser. If you want to use the app, use the app. I'm sorry. Was your suggestion just Skype? I don't know. Gavin, you can't trust Gavin with Skype. Ever since he did that commercial with his grandfather when he was a little boy, he's been shilling that company.
Starting point is 00:05:05 Did they pay you in stock? Is that what happened? Skype really dropped the ball. I don't know how. I think you got Skype credit. Do you guys know what I'm talking about? Have you ever seen that old commercial? No, I have no idea what you're talking about. Gavin and his grandfather, how old were you, Gav? 17, 16. This kid, in his charmed
Starting point is 00:05:22 life, when Gavin was 16 or 17, he somehow became a part of a national campaign for commercials for Skype. What? And there is a television commercial of Gavin and his grandfather having Skype conversations together. It was all over TV in England.
Starting point is 00:05:36 That's incredible. I had a line in it. What was your line? I'll do it. Are you ready? Okay. Do you need me to be grandpa? Do grandpa have lines? Yeah, you be be you be grandpa you say hi Gavin okay hmm
Starting point is 00:05:49 hi Gabby are you gonna do it in Italian accent I was trying to do Mario. Okay, and then I'll do my bit. Hi. That's it? That's your line? Why did I have six lines? Did Nick just find it?
Starting point is 00:06:15 Yay, there it is. It's a minute and a half long. This is too long for Skype. Yeah, it's too long. Anyway. Yeah, that's been out there for ages. Anyway, you guys can watch it after the podcast. That's funny.
Starting point is 00:06:26 I had no idea. Look at that little cutie. I got that because I was on the Skype forums. I think I was trying to fix my granddad's Skype or something. And then there was a thread that said, tell us how you use Skype. And I was like, I use it to talk to my granddad. And they were like, that's great. Can we make a commercial about that? I was like, okay.
Starting point is 00:06:43 Perfect. What was the best conversation you had with your granddad over Skype? How long were they on average, would you say? Pretty long. In chat, maybe half an hour ago. Now we just use this other thing called FaceTime. I thought you were going to say Discord. I was going to ask if your grandpa has Discord Nitro.
Starting point is 00:06:58 He has Nitro. Because we can use some boosts. We need nine more, apparently. You guys may not know this, but Gavin is exceptionally close to his grandfather. They are like best buddies. I love him. He used to send me these videos like way, way, way, way, way before our Achievement Hunter
Starting point is 00:07:13 of him getting his granddad to play games like Assassin's Creed and watching him like run around and get funny. You remember that? You remember those little gameplay videos you would send me of you and your grandpa playing games? Yeah. I wanted him to make Achievement Hunter videos. That would have been great.
Starting point is 00:07:31 So that's it, Jeff? That's your friend-ervention? I feel like... Oh, yeah. So, Gab, I guess we're good now. I missed it? Damn. I thought we had a nice chat the other night. I gave you plenty of opportunity to respond, and you didn't respond to anything I said,
Starting point is 00:07:41 so I consider the beef squashed. You were like, our friendship's weird and awkward, and then we had a conversation and uh you somehow fixed it in one go yeah i did here's here's what it turns out uh i was trying to like this when i as soon as i joined man i am tongue-tied as soon as i joined look man i i've i've had one night of sleep in my bed in the last like eight days um i'm running on empty right now but uh i uh as soon as i joined eric was like you got to lead with the friend intervention and i forgot we ended with that last time what happened was the second the podcast ended gavin came over and he goes do we need to have an intervention and i was like i think things are weird between us don't you think these are weird between us and he was like not really and
Starting point is 00:08:24 i was like oh okay i guess it's just me. Then you want to hang out? And he's like, always. And then it's been fine. Yeah, well, you were like, I feel like things are awkward with every person. I was like, oh, am I making it awkward? And you were like, I think I am. But I was like, OK, and it was fine.
Starting point is 00:08:38 That was it. And we had to have that one not even really awkward conversation. And then we talked for two hours in Gavin's living room. We've been great since. I'm glad that that's how it played out yeah I felt awkward after you said it was and I was like oh I guess maybe it is and I was like is it me and you were like oh maybe I think it's me and then it after like two minutes it felt fine oh shit I'm tongue-tied too Jesus I'm so glad that the two of you are back but I do wish it happened on the show because it would have been so much more awkward whatever the online exchange was between the two of you of trying to figure this out.
Starting point is 00:09:08 No, we just had a really nice conversation. And then we went out to dinner where we screamed at each other. It was great. Oh, I forgot. We went out to dinner. That's fantastic. What did you guys have? What did you have, Gav?
Starting point is 00:09:20 You had pizza. I had a big pizza. Yeah, I had a pizza that was a salad. It was one of those restaurants where it served about half a foot above the table big pizza, yeah. I had a pizza that was... I had a salad. It was one of those restaurants where it served about half a foot above the table. Oh, wow. I think it's a little special. That's fancy.
Starting point is 00:09:31 Don't know why it couldn't have been on the table in front of me like a plate, but... Did you bring your own Branston for them to put on it at the restaurant? It was so loud in this restaurant that Emily and Meg were across from Gavin and I about I would say I don't know about you Gavin but I would say like maybe 30% of the way through
Starting point is 00:09:50 dinner I gave up trying to talk to them at all it was just I couldn't hear anything they said and I couldn't yell loud enough and I just talked to you for the maybe that's why I had such a good time it's true I kept having this message come off on my watch I'll post it talk amongst yourselves.
Starting point is 00:10:06 What do you think the message is going to say, Andrew? Any guesses? I don't know. Do you think it'll be related to Discord? Do you think it will be possibly... Too loud. Eric thinks it'll be too loud. Too loud. This isn't from in the moment, but I took a screenshot of it. This is a fucking paragraph. This isn't a... Around one hour and
Starting point is 00:10:22 45 minutes a day at this level can cause temporary hearing loss. The weekly limit at this level is around 12 hours and 30 minutes. I didn't know they did that. It was that loud. It was kind of crazy, because you're used to the normal restaurant atmosphere, but I can't hear what someone one foot away from me is saying.
Starting point is 00:10:45 I think what it was, I think what happened was, this was last Friday night, and I think it was the first night everybody came out from hibernation and was like, I want to reclaim my life and have a night out on the town. And I just felt like everybody in Austin was loud
Starting point is 00:11:00 and boisterous and defiant all at once. It was fucking annoying. So was it people loud or was it music loud? Everything. defiant all at once it was fucking annoying so is it people loud or was it music loud everything wow okay but it was mostly people the last time we recorded we should probably say in the last episode if some of the audio sounded weird that's uh my fault i set up jeff at meg's desk but i didn't check what was being recorded and it turns out meg has for her streaming setup she has everything on discord also is recorded to the file so anytime jeff was talking and someone else is talking we it's it's just i guess a shit show of the audio i can't believe uh an
Starting point is 00:11:32 actual usable episode came out of that but if sometimes jeff sounds like he's on discord it's probably because that's the feed we're using um and at that point jeff you had no power for i think two days right yeah yeah how long did it go on uh so i moved home yesterday oh man uh what happened was uh and i have an interesting story about how i got my power back actually uh i will say it was uh it was through perseverance on my part and desperation. So that was on what? Like Thursday, I guess. I was that day I moved into a hotel, right?
Starting point is 00:12:12 Like I came over to your house Wednesday night to shower. I brought the family over like refugees and we showered. And then the next day, Emily was like, I can't do this. I just can't do it anymore. She's got to like get up and go stand on her feet 12 hours a day at a beauty salon. And she has to, you know, look fabulous. And it's fucking impossible in a house with no heat or electricity. And so I was like, got it. We'll we'll get a hotel. Start looking around. There are fucking no hotels anywhere in town at this point, obviously. And so I start to get a little desperate. Millie's mom still has power. So Millie went to stay with her mom for a couple days. And then luckily, I was able to get a hotel room. And so I was able to find one hotel room. And then while I was checking in, four people just walked in off the street and were like, got any rooms?
Starting point is 00:12:55 And they were like, no. And they were like, fuck. So I felt pretty fortunate. So then we spent two nights in a hotel there. But that's very expensive. That's a couple hundred bucks a night was all all i could find and that wasn't sustainable so i decided uh on saturday there's still no electric company in sight at this point the city is sending out vague updates like we restored the power to 50 000 people today and then that's all you hear and you're like what about
Starting point is 00:13:21 what about me and they're like we can't give you any update at this time, but we're working on it, you know? And so Saturday, I was missing Millie too much anyway, so we Airbnb'd a place in Mueller, which is over where RT is
Starting point is 00:13:32 because they bury their power lines there, so you don't have to worry about the power going out, and moved into a house and rented it until Monday and thought, okay,
Starting point is 00:13:41 surely by Monday we'll have power. Still nothing come Monday. Asked if we could extend, stayed till Tuesday. They wouldn't let us stay any further than that. I guess they'd already had it booked. And so Tuesday we were sweating. I rented another Airbnb for Wednesday and Thursday
Starting point is 00:13:55 because Friday and Saturday, we're gonna go stay out of town anyway for Emily's birthday. So then I get up Wednesday morning before I go to check into the... No, Tuesday morning, right after I book the other hotel rooms. And what I had been doing throughout the day at this point is I would drive over,
Starting point is 00:14:16 because I live across town from RT and from that Airbnb, I would drive across town and sit in my driveway for four or five hours at a time, just to see if somebody would show up and to be there when somebody showed up, right? And so Tuesday morning, I go and I drive into the driveway and I'm sitting in the driveway. And well, as I go to pull up, I see 12 trucks on my street. I counted. It was fabulous. There were tree trimming trucks, like disaster relief trucks, Asplund. There were like city of Austin trucks with cranes and cherry pickers. And I was like, it looked like they rolled out a fleet. It looked like
Starting point is 00:14:52 the military showed up to fix my street. And I was like, fuck yeah. And so I went, it was so packed. I actually, I couldn't park on my street. I had to park a street down and then walk home. And as I walked around kind of this, the backside of my house, I, there was a bunch of dudes with chainsaws on this little area woods right outside my property. And I walked up to them. I'm like, thanks so much guys. Really appreciate it. And they're like looking at the power line stuff and they're like, yeah, no worries, man. And I was like, look, so my gates open, it's unlocked. It's right there. You guys can go right in. And they're like, okay, cool. And then I went and I went into the house, uh, and I was just like hanging out, waiting to see what the power turned on. And I waited
Starting point is 00:15:26 for like three hours and they were still going strong and I had to run some errands. So I ran and I ran some errands and I came home and when I came home, I'd been gone like 30 minutes. All of the cars were gone. The 12 vehicles were all gone.
Starting point is 00:15:42 And as I'm driving up my road, I look over to the right, and my side of the street, which was all out of power, everybody's got porch lights on. And I'm like, oh shit, we got our power back. My house does not have a porch light on. Oh no. No. And then right
Starting point is 00:15:58 past my house, there's like two trucks. I just couldn't see them from the road. There's like two trucks left, and they're just facing each other, talking through the windows. City of Austin trucks. And just couldn't see him from the road. There's like two trucks left and they're just like facing each other like talking through the windows city of Austin trucks and I'm like but it's raining. It's sprinkling and I'm like you know what? I bet everybody else moved on to another gig. They're just left to do my
Starting point is 00:16:13 house. It started raining. They probably can't be fucking with the electricity and the rain. I don't know why I thought that. I'm sure they probably can but I'm like so I'll just I'll just wait for the rain to stop and then I'll go out and check on them and I go inside the house and i sit in front of my window and i'm just looking out the window and two minutes after i do that one of the cars drives by and i go oh shit and now i'm down i'm from like 12 trucks down to one in the span of like 40 minutes and everybody
Starting point is 00:16:39 in my street has internet or has uh as electricity but me and I'm like, Oh fuck. No, I'm like, I gotta go. I'm going to go like beg this guy. So I get up out of my, out of the chair. And I, as I'm opening the front door, that guy's driving away.
Starting point is 00:16:53 And I just, I didn't even think I just panic ran, booked it like Forrest Gump straight at the truck as he's driving down the street. And I'm like, wait, wait, stop. And the guy like, wait! Wait! Stop!
Starting point is 00:17:06 And the guy looks back like I'm a fucking lunatic and he pulls over in the middle of the street and he's like, what's up, man? He's like Duck Dynasty, like a dude with a big old beard and like Ray-Bans on. And he was like, what's up, man? And I was like, are you leaving? And he's like,
Starting point is 00:17:21 yeah, we gotta go to the next gig. And I'm like, I still don't have power. It looks like everybody else has power power but me i don't know if you guys just miss me or what but if you guys leave i'm fucked could you just it's been a week man could you just what are you gonna come back and the guy looks at me and he's like he just takes me in for a second and he goes hold on a second and he pulls over and he gets out of his truck and he goes uh show me what you got and i walk him down the street, back to my house, around my backyard. Sounds like my granddad. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:17:48 And he goes, and I take him to my backyard and I show him the tree that's fallen and the electric wires are like spaghetti on the ground. And he goes, tree trimmers didn't come back here and do anything with this? And I was like, no, I said hi to him. I pointed at it and he goes, ugh. And he looked at it for a while. And it's raining the whole time, by the way. And he looked at it for a little while longer and he goes uh he was just real quiet and still and he goes uh
Starting point is 00:18:09 all right man we'll get you back on and then he walked back to his truck and he got on like a walkie-talkie or some shit or a cb and then three trucks rolled up and there were 12 dudes in my backyard and an hour later that's had power. That's amazing. It was fucking awesome. It was fucking awesome. But then I didn't have internet. And so that didn't get fixed until yesterday. Oh, it's back though.
Starting point is 00:18:34 Yeah, it's back. I'm recording at home right now. It was cool to see the updates. And I guess it felt way longer to you. But I was surprised that every day we'd get an email from Austin Energy or whoever. It's like, we got 68% of customers back online. And the next day be like, hey, there's 75%. And you were always, I think it got down to like 88%.
Starting point is 00:18:50 And Jeff was in the remaining, like it was like 92% and you were in the remaining eight or something. I was in the remaining 5%. And today's email was 99. They were sending me texts and emails saying, congratulations, 95% of customers have power and i was reading it on my phone plugged into a fucking battery it was pretty impressive though
Starting point is 00:19:13 just to like see the progress every day it's like jesus they must have reconnected so many people yesterday but you were just right at the very end i wonder how long it would have gone on if you didn't run out like a maniac well that's that's the thing, right? I'd have been fucked. Like, I would have literally been fucked because I have not seen a truck on the street since. Like, I think they fixed this neighborhood and moved on and I would have just gone to the back of the fucking line, I guess. Even though I had reported it like four times and called and a lady read. She was like, sir, I have three reports. Let me read them to you.
Starting point is 00:19:43 Is this you? Is this you? Is this you? And I'm like, yep, that's me. And she's like, okay. And I let me read them to you is this you is this you is this you and I'm like yep that's me and she's like okay and I'm like we could put another one in even though I did all that I still have no faith that had
Starting point is 00:19:51 that guy not pulled over if I hadn't desperately like like a lunatic chased after him I would probably be in an Airbnb I would be in the other Airbnb that I couldn't get a refund for for Wednesday and Thursday that cost me $600. Oh, man.
Starting point is 00:20:07 Yeah, I booked it, and then four hours later, I had to pay. No! And then I was like, please, please. It was like $659, and they gave me $59 back. Oh, that's so kind of them. It's a great refund. It's insulting. I had the freeze reveal this bag.
Starting point is 00:20:27 It's a bag of soil that I threw So basically The freeze collapsed all my plants And it allowed me to see this bag I was like oh I remember that I just chucked a bag of soil back there Because about a year ago I tried to plant some stuff Here's how it went Didn't take
Starting point is 00:20:42 Everything died Planted some stuff over by the fence. Died. Nothing I plant lasts. Sorry, not to interrupt, but just for the people listening. Not just dead. Like, it looks like parts of Gavin's yard are in Mad Max. Like, that's how dead.
Starting point is 00:20:57 Yeah. Zero life. It looks like they were tortured to death. No matter how much water I give them or don't give them or where I put him in the shade and the Sun everything just burns to a crisp and dies. So I'm just like let me just throw away this depressing bag of soil. I picked it up and it flew out of my hand and slapped straight back down into the ground. The freaking bag grew! I grew a bag! Something in the bag has taken and a root has burrowed through the plastic
Starting point is 00:21:26 and straight into the ground. It's a strong root. I grew something. Jeff, did you do that? It feels like he's being pranked. Is that a prank by you? Because you said that's a great prank. Did you throw a bunch of seeds in my hidden bag? Who fucking... Things were still weird between us at the time, so
Starting point is 00:21:43 I couldn't... Who thinks of that prank? I wish I was that smart. That's devious. I really want to know what it is. What if it's not a weed? What if it's a rare tree? It could be a rare tree.
Starting point is 00:21:57 I think people should, everyone should buy a bag of soil and just plant it. That's, yeah. As a bag. You don't know it. That's, yeah. As a bag. You don't know it's not a rare tree. So it's on the table. It's possibly a rare tree. I just can't believe that something that's been hidden under a bush inside a bag with no sunlight can actually survive better than the stuff I want to grow. That's crazy.
Starting point is 00:22:21 I mean, that feels pretty par for the course to me. Did you put, is the bag still down? Oh, I'm not gonna get rid of it now. Yeah, now you're committed Are you gonna try to are you gonna try to grow it further? Are you just gonna leave it well no if I try to grow it will die If you make any attempt to take care of it you will kill it Yeah, so you're just gonna leave it and it's just gonna continue. I'm gonna leave it Can we get an update and like a year from now?
Starting point is 00:22:44 Can you put in your calendar if the bag is still there? Oh, definitely, yeah. If it grows baby bags, I'll buy one for you. We've missed you, Jeff, without internet. We've continued to play Warzone.
Starting point is 00:22:58 Oh, man, that sounds cool. I would love to play with y'all. We should play. Are you playing tonight? We could play tonight. Could maybe play tonight, yeah. What time? That's a maybe.
Starting point is 00:23:06 Tomorrow night? I can't do tomorrow night. Tomorrow night and Saturday night, I'll be out of town. Okay. We'll figure it out. And then Sunday, there'll be a Super Bowl.
Starting point is 00:23:14 We had an all-time moment when we were playing the other night, Jeff, because you know game chat. That was something I was popping into whenever we encounter people, whenever we see it. Because Gavin and I
Starting point is 00:23:23 were holding this building and there were holding this building, and there were people above us that were having constant conversation. And so I said, let's switch to game chat. And I told Gavin how to do it. And so we're both in game chat, just listening to these two guys. And they had a helicopter above us.
Starting point is 00:23:37 So I dropped down an airstrike to try to lure them to us. And they avoided it, but it destroyed their chopper. And they're like, oh, the helicopter's gone now. now god damn it you want me to use my uav and the guy's like nah wait till we need it to the last minute and something that those guys said uh made me laugh and i was like i had a little laugh and i was like oh my god i hope they didn't i hope it didn't come through and then a moment later i hear the guy yell i I see you, Gavin Free.
Starting point is 00:24:05 Because Gavin also had a little like the slightest laugh and it came through and his name popped up and they got so aggressive about it. It's fantastic. We've missed you. It escalated until like three other teams showed up and everybody died. It was the best. But just like I was so nervous. I blew our cover. And then I heard like a little snort from Gavin and just
Starting point is 00:24:25 the guy jumped on it. I just couldn't help it. It's great. That's what we've been doing. Well you've been struggling with your air me be situation. It sucks that you weren't able to get refunded. Oh that's okay. I feel like I paid 600 bucks to get my power
Starting point is 00:24:41 turned back on. You know? Yeah I guess if you put it in that perspective, sure. It's all in how you choose to look at it to help maintain one's sanity. That's fair. In these complicated times. I'm not letting it get me down, boys. I said I was going to have a good 2023.
Starting point is 00:24:57 I said it wasn't going to start off like dog shit like 2022. I lost my power for a week. I got stitches all up and down my hand, but I have power now and I have no stitches, so everything's coming up roses. You have a fridge? Is the fridge okay? The fridge is okay. I bought it
Starting point is 00:25:13 and I had to buy an entire new round of ketchup and mustard and soy sauce and fucking milk and sodas and shit. Well, not sodas, but... Can ketchup not be warm? Dude, I don't know. Can ketchup be warm?
Starting point is 00:25:27 It's supposed to be refrigerated. I think you can have it out for a bit. Yeah, I don't know. I don't know, for like a week? Once it's opened? I don't know. I just proofed the Next Does It Do, the disgusting vomit one.
Starting point is 00:25:40 It's a real... It's foul. I haven't finished it yet. I got to the part where it's real it's a real it's foul i haven't finished it yet i got to the i got to the part where it's like one hour later we're about to start checking it out and then i had to turn it off thankfully they cut to you when i actually threw up so you see that you see a lot of gagging and you don't see any vomit come out my mouth which is probably for the best but when i was talking to disgusting i was talking to tyler about the other day he was saying he wasn't sure it was an episode and i was like oh hell yeah it is it's got to be an episode he's like maybe it'll be cut up and put as a part of another and i was like no no it's it's
Starting point is 00:26:12 definitely an episode it's just a it's just a gross episode can i can i see the cuts of whatever that is i want to see this so bad can i whatever list i need to be on to see the cuts of this have you not seen any of i haven't, I haven't seen any of the update. We've got two episodes. Oh, I need to see them. That's great. Maybe we should show them to you on office day or something. So that's what I was thinking.
Starting point is 00:26:33 I'm intentionally not sending them to people that weren't directly in that because I didn't know if it was going to be a thing where it's like, we want to show you these a certain way. We want you to do this other thing with it. I'm intentionally holding that back. But if you want me to send it to Andrew, I can send them both episodes right now. Whatever works. As long as I get to see them.
Starting point is 00:26:51 I think it'd be fun to hear your reaction. Is it like full episodes? How long are they? Yeah. Like 12, like one's like eight minutes. I think one's like 12 minutes. I think they're all going to be around eight to 15, something like that. So you want me to save these Gavin for whenever? When is our next office day supposed to be?
Starting point is 00:27:06 It is the beginning of March the 3rd. Okay. I'm just going to, I'll avoid watching these for a month. Will the show be out by then? It is slated and people are going to dog me because it's not going to come out at this time, but whatever. The week of March 13th is supposed to be the first one, but I'm trying to work something in the background. So, okay.
Starting point is 00:27:28 Why don't we move an office day up? Yeah. When would you like to do it? No, we're not. No, hang on. No,
Starting point is 00:27:33 we're not. Hang on. Hang on. Go ahead. Gavin, Gavin, when would you like to talk about after talk about after I kind of want to move it off as well.
Starting point is 00:27:43 I wouldn't mind moving it up. Yeah, yeah. No, I think that's fine. So when would you like to do that? How about next Friday? Next Friday, the 17th. What do you think, Gavin? Done.
Starting point is 00:27:53 Moving on. I'm sorry? Yeah. He's moving on. He's going to talk about it later. Oh, okay. No, he said done. Yeah, moving on.
Starting point is 00:27:59 I just don't want to fill the episode with another one of us arranging something. No, no. That's, yeah. Well, you did this. You brought it into play. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean, you should have done that. 17th.
Starting point is 00:28:08 Got it. Well, I did it with also saying, let's talk about it after. Adding it now, and it is sent the 17th. We've done it. Easy peasy. This ad is brought to you by HelloFresh, America's number one meal kit. Remember those New Year's goals you promised yourself you'd stick to? HelloFresh is here to help you eat better by delivering fresh ingredients and easy recipes right to your door, taking the hassle out of dinner time.
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Starting point is 00:32:49 Do you ever just do something that, in public, that is like you autopilot and do it, and then you realize it's really inappropriate? Yes. I burp and fart loudly all the time now, thanks to the pandemic. When I was working at Waitrose,
Starting point is 00:33:03 I couldn't stop ripping the receipt off other people's checkouts i just kept doing it it's like a muscle muscle memory of just like if i was buying something in a different store i would tear the receipt off because i was so used to doing it when i was working the waitress check i had to. It was becoming a real problem for me. I was like, oh, I'm so sorry. I also work on the checkout. Have you had anything like that? No, not that I can think of.
Starting point is 00:33:33 Not that it didn't go unchecked. I got flagged for... I didn't realize I was doing it, but now that it was pointed out to me, I realized I did it a lot at Christmas. I kept opening up all of Emily's presents for her when she wasn't opening them because you're like why I've been present sometimes you know and she'd be like it's my present and I was like oh fuck I did it again didn't I yeah that's funny hope that's not
Starting point is 00:34:02 something I've been doing my whole life and it's just the first time somebody's pointed out to to me you know did you have something come up gavin that that made you think of that recently well basically when i'm tired that stuff kind of sneaks in again so i think i was really tired at pet smart or something and i i'll reach for it i didn't i probably probably the only thing that manifested physically was maybe my hand twitched as i like stopped myself and i was like oh my god it's been like 17 years since I worked in a supermarket. But I still was just like, oh, that's so funny. Like, I'm actually worried about it. That really burned in for some reason.
Starting point is 00:34:34 Yeah, that's interesting. And I've never had that. I've had things that are not socially acceptable to do when I was like, I don't know, seven. I accidentally stole a Pez dispenser briefly from a store because we're like gonna go see shrek or something and i got really excited about it and i was like i'll just i'll wait at the theater and i ran out of the store and the alarm went off and i was like i guess the alarm's going off like i didn't connect that it was me and then i got all the way to the theater and realized that i was still holding like the the packaged pez dispenser and i had to go all
Starting point is 00:35:03 the way back and return it you just thought it was that pair of shorts or something. Yeah. That was before the shorts. I did have a thing recently talking about my sneak game. I don't think this is shoplifting. Maybe you guys can evaluate if this is shoplifting or not. We got the Super
Starting point is 00:35:19 Bowl this weekend. It's a lot of like grocery stores. They got their deals and whatnot. and there was like this buy three family-sized bags of chips for ten dollars and i was like great i'll get two ketchups and i'll get a barbecue and so i got i went to the store they didn't have any barbecue in the thing so i was like i'll just take i'll get a plane i guess so i got my two ketchups and my plane paid for everything as i'm leaving the store i realized that they have a display kind of near the front with a bunch of the chips and
Starting point is 00:35:51 there's a barbecue in that pile but i've already paid for my plane so i was like oh what do i do is it okay is it morally is it stealing if i swap out one of my chip bags because I've paid for all three, but I didn't pay for this specific bag of chips. So... If the price is the same, that's totally fine. It's the same. It's the exact same. It would have been the exact same deal.
Starting point is 00:36:14 Everything's the same. It's just a different flavor. It's a different bag. I assume you're just messing with their inventory, but it's not... I wouldn't say it's stealing. It's the closest. I've never shoplifted anything,
Starting point is 00:36:26 and I was like, oh, yeah, as you know, I'm a real sneaky guy, so let's pull it off. You shop swapped. Yeah, let's pull off this maneuver. So I was kind of nervous about it, and I was like, well, looking around and making sure that there's nobody looking, and I put all the chips down,
Starting point is 00:36:41 and then I thought I was being real sneaky, and I grabbed the barbecue. I was like, hmm, interesting, and then I like, I thought I was being real sneaky and I grabbed the barbecue. It was like, Hmm, interesting. And then like, I walked away with my bags and everything, my, my three chips. And I got in the car and I realized that I'd accidentally swapped out the
Starting point is 00:36:54 wrong bag. I wanted to get rid of my regular, I had two ketchups and it was supposed to be a barbecue. I instead got rid of one of my ketchups. So now I had one bag of ketchup, one bag of barbecue and one bag of barbecue, and one bag of plain. And I walked back in the store and I did it again. I did it nervously.
Starting point is 00:37:09 I got rid of the bag I grabbed that I wasn't supposed to. So we're all good. But I ended up having to do it twice. How's that stealing, Eric? I think that leaving, you've walked into weird territory by leaving. And then going back. But it's the same. It's untouched. But here's the thing. I'm fine
Starting point is 00:37:30 with it. I think you should steal from the grocery store. So I'm okay with it. But I want you to know that I still think it's stealing. Really? Here's the deal. It's not stealing if you haven't left the parking lot. If you're in the parking lot of the store still,
Starting point is 00:37:48 you're still a part of the store, I think. So if you walk outside into the parking lot and then walk back into the store, I think that's fine. Now, if you were to leave the parking lot and then come back, then I think you gotta talk to the manager. But I think if you just step outside for a second
Starting point is 00:38:02 and go like, oh, fuck, I grabbed the wrong thing, I think you'd go back. That's actually an interesting, I didn't even consider asking one of the staff. Why, why would the threshold be the parking lot? Cause I think it's still a part of the store. Why would the threshold be the store?
Starting point is 00:38:15 Why, Andrew, you're asking why the threshold, the threshold for the store would be the store. No, no, I'm saying you're saying the threshold is if you leave the store and he's saying,
Starting point is 00:38:24 if you leave the parking lot, what you're saying is an arbitrary line that you've made up. So for you to be like, Jeff, your arbitrary line is ridiculous. The door is the threshold. I didn't make up the line. They put the door there. The HEB parking lot
Starting point is 00:38:39 is HEB property. It's part and parcel with the store, so i still think they're they're connected that's a good point okay so hang on hang on gavin do you think that what he did was good or bad or stealing where's the line i think yeah i think you should have talked to the someone in there i think that's just a weird thing to just go in and but i paid i didn't cost the store any money i paid exactly what i should have paid. The transaction was as intended. Yeah, but something's missing
Starting point is 00:39:08 for them now, isn't it? Well, it's, you know, maybe, I'm sure people steal chips all the time. Like, I'm sure that my thing, I'm sure I'm not the one in perfection in the system. So now you're saying people steal chips, so it's okay that you stole chips? No, I didn't steal chips.
Starting point is 00:39:24 I'm saying it's okay that I may have messed with their inventory system. Because I'm sure it's fucked. I mean, every place I've worked at that has done inventory, it's fucked. It never works. I messed with a store inventory once. I found, when I was moving house once, I found a pot noodle down the back of my drawers that expired like seven years ago. And pot noodles expire like five years after you get them.
Starting point is 00:39:45 And I thought it'd be funny just to put them back on the shelf at the shop so i did i messed with their inventory on a much larger time scale but i don't think what i did is stealing i think it's just potentially giving them a lawsuit i put i just put it back with the other pot noodles and all of like the the logo and packaging was different. And it was expired by, it was expired by like, what if somebody buys that and gets sick and die? You murdered somebody. Well,
Starting point is 00:40:11 I assume the barcode won't work. It's way worse than, it's way worse than switching out somebody's potato chips. You're a killer. I assume someone would just try and buy it. This one looks different. And then it says like 1997 on the back. Oh, God.
Starting point is 00:40:27 I'd be so mad if I bought those. I wouldn't do that now. That was actually before I worked at a supermarket. The 20 feet from swapping the chips to walk into the car, I've never felt cooler. And it was such a letdown to realize I grabbed the wrong bag. I swapped out the wrong thing. You always think you're being sneaky when you're not.
Starting point is 00:40:44 Do you want to talk about how not sneaky you were last night on Call of Duty? What do you mean? When you tried to sneak out of your previous party. I was playing. I was playing with a different group of people, and I was swapping over to join with Gavin, and I forgot I hadn't left the session I was previously in, so they were all still with me.
Starting point is 00:41:04 And I was like, yeah, I'm going to call call for the night I'll talk to you guys later and I joined Gavin and I brought the entire party with me I panicked I didn't know what to do so I just left the lobby like that was the solution and I said I don't know what the name of it I don't know what the name of the opposite of an Irish goodbye is but Andrew definitely did it he just threw everyone into my party and left himself. And I was like, oh, what the fuck? And I couldn't figure out how to leave. So I was like, oh.
Starting point is 00:41:34 So then I got a message from one of the people that was in that party. And they said, it's funny. Gavin joined our session right after you left they didn't realize I brought them they thought that Gavin was trying to join me naturally and it just happened the timing was off and so I was like
Starting point is 00:41:54 and then I was like oh shit and he left and I was like oh so they think that they messaged me and they're like yeah because they had they played with gavin before i invited them when we're playing and so they thought that gavin added them on call of duty and just like joined i don't know what they thought but they didn't realize i brought them and they completely misinterpreted it but they listened to the show so i guess whenever they hear this they'll realize what happened you were in my voice chat at that point but you brought them into my card game so they couldn't hear you
Starting point is 00:42:27 no or me oh the panic of seeing all four people just a full that's brilliant that's great i saw something interesting on our base instagram Yeah. So the people have been posting their own life hacks. Gavin life hack. If it's dark, use one of these switches on the wall. Look, I get it, alright? I don't understand what qualifies as a life hack yet, but I'm working on it. There's no need for that.
Starting point is 00:43:01 There's no need. It would be, your life hack would be if it's dark, flip the light switch in your room to turn the lights on. I laugh my ass off for that. That's so funny. Do you think? I'll eventually get one. You need to keep writing down everyone you think is one.
Starting point is 00:43:23 That's going to be the end payoff. I'm so excited to hear that. I have a few more written down. I'm just too embarrassed to even oh, please Please share one give us one just one save Life hack save money on nostalgia keep your childhood ed 64 right this only applies But right like gaming now don't sell I always sold my Super Nintendo to buy my N64 and then I sold my N64
Starting point is 00:43:58 to buy my Xbox but all that happened later is that I had to buy one again on eBay and it's more expensive so just save the money up front right um just you know do a little bit of extra work uh don't don't sell the console that you're on now because it's your child this is for the kids out there and it might it might have an emotional connection to you later when you realize you haven't had it and you want to get one again. This is your most narrow.
Starting point is 00:44:29 Yeah, that's pretty specific, though, isn't it? It was so specific and it's against time. You can't tell anyone now and buy an N64 20 years ago. If you grew up on the PS5, right? And you had the best games you play as you players growing up, right? They're amazing. It's unbelievable. I think because nostalgia is so expensive, you can make the saving now.
Starting point is 00:44:52 This is the problem, though. That's my hack. I think the real power of it is when you're a kid. I think the nostalgia, maybe, I don't know. I don't think I'm gonna be as into, I love the GameCube and the N64. I don't think in 20 years from be as into... I love the GameCube and the N64. I don't think in 20 years from now,
Starting point is 00:45:07 I'll feel the same about the Xbox One. But you didn't grow up on the Xbox One. No, that's what I'm saying. I'm saying it's specific for kids, so it's not like you can tell people now who are adults, hey, hold on to that PS5. Yeah, but he's not. He's telling kids today.
Starting point is 00:45:20 I'm saying that that's even how narrow his thing... This is the most narrow advice I think he's given. I'd have to look at it. I don't remember the other ones off the top of my head, but it is so specific. Eric said, life hack is just weight. What it pulls down to is if you're a kid, don't ever throw anything away because when you're a grown
Starting point is 00:45:39 up, the one thing that you threw away or traded away, it's worth a lot of money now and you're fucked. And you would have had that money but now you don't have that money. If I could buy my actual childhood Super Nintendo, I would pay double the price for it. If I could have that specific one, I would love it. I think the nice
Starting point is 00:45:55 thing about being a grown up is that you can buy back all the shit you had when you were a kid easily because you can afford it and it's not grimy and covered in crap. I think it depends on maybe what you're collecting. Certain things, they can get real expensive pretty quickly. I definitely regret like trading in a bunch of games at GameStop when I was growing up to try to get whatever, like trading in 20 games to get one game just because I didn't
Starting point is 00:46:19 have the money for it. But I'd rather have those 20 games at this point than whatever that new release was. So hack or whack uh i would say definite whack if those are my only two options second of all i want you to reframe this and think about you're on a skype call with your grandpa as a kid and your grandpa tells you this do you think it connects at all because it's for kids but it feels like the most i'm gonna tone you out advice i would get from an old person like that's how i'd view it as a kid oh yeah no one no one would actually well no one's listening to this you don't want to hold on to the old thing when there's a new thing out you don't want to wait like an extra year as a kid i understand that but i just i just wish i sold something different what would you
Starting point is 00:47:03 have sold i don't know like a lamp i don't know i should have sold a bunch of smaller shit i just really missed my super nintendo yeah like a like a bicycle or something yeah bike is fair a lamp all my parents lamps what you've done here where'd your where'd your bedside table go? What you've done here, it's not a life hack, but it is a life pro tip. Yes. Okay. You've created a life pro tip. All of Gavin's advice has been great.
Starting point is 00:47:38 It just is not a hack in any way. All right. Yeah. That's why I wanted to keep that one to myself. What if we gave you a prompt and we were like, come back in a week with a life hack for this problem or this product? Sounds like a great prompt for all of us to have a go at. Yeah, well, then we'd all have to do it, though. I guess how would we come up with the prompt, though?
Starting point is 00:47:58 Well, we'll have to think about that. Yeah, we'll think about the prompt. The prompt could be anything. It could be garden hose. It could be cold pizza. It could be, I don't know, whatever, you know? Eric could come up with the prompt. The prompt could be anything. It could be garden hose. It could be a cold pizza. It could be, I don't know, whatever,
Starting point is 00:48:06 you know, Eric can come up with a prompt. Okay. I think we can come up with solutions. All right. Okay. I'll try to think of a prompt. I don't really don't use Simon as Eric.
Starting point is 00:48:16 Like I, so far I was given garden hose or cold pizza. Yeah. Cool. So you want us to come up with a garden hose life hack? No, I don't. No, you said...
Starting point is 00:48:28 I think you do. I could probably do that. I'm pretty sure... I think Jeff just has a garden hose life hack and he's trying to steer it to that. Yeah, I think so too.
Starting point is 00:48:36 So he can establish his great life hack. No, I don't. I don't have any... The first thing I would do would be to Google garden hose life hack. Garden hose.
Starting point is 00:48:50 I think that the thing that's special about these life hacks, especially Gavin's life hacks, is that they feel like they are solving a problem that, that is apparently unique to him, but not, but also not really solving a problem. So I feel like given a prompt is really narrowing the focus. I really like the way they're rolling in. I really like all of Gavin's life hacks,
Starting point is 00:49:12 which are just sort of advice that you would hear someone say, and you'd go, all right, man, thanks. And then walk away and go, nah. These are really, I think so far, I don't remember what your second one was, but the first one was learning classical music, right? Like who composed what? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:49:30 This one is save all the stuff. It's really old Gavin trying to teach young, like these are things you wish you would have learned. And these are coming up, I'm assuming as you're encountering them in your life. Like, did you look at your n64 last night was like man i wish i didn't pay 150 or 200 for this now like how did you get to that conclusion well i was just playing goldeneye again on the xbox i was like i wish i could just play this on my
Starting point is 00:49:57 original hardware see what see what it feels like but you don't you don't actually no goldeneye on the original hardware plays like shit. Yeah. I mean, it doesn't play great on even modern. It's having two analog sticks makes it so much better. It's a nightmare with one. Nostalgia makes everything so much better than it was. That's the beauty of nostalgia. That's why at least play it on emulators, play it on your Xbox, and play it well.
Starting point is 00:50:23 But there's a certain feeling you can get though of like firing up a super nintendo game that you haven't seen or heard in 20 years and then the music kicks on and you're like oh holy shit you get a ton of memories that that's like the hit i want that's a little dopamine hit i get that but what if you chase that i feel like that would wear off over time if that was a thing you pursued constantly. Yeah. And it's diminishing returns. Yeah. I think like spreading it out is the way to go with that. I wonder if that would be less rewarding if you could just go into your closet and pull it out. Like if you had your original. Do you think you're wishing you had your old Super Nintendo is better than if you just had it?
Starting point is 00:51:04 Like the feeling you would have of just keeping it this entire time. I don't know. I think it'd be pretty cool to be like, that's the first game console I played. Yeah, that's fair. I just, I wonder if like the, the weight of those emotions are heightened
Starting point is 00:51:15 because you don't have it as opposed to if you would have kept it all along, if it would feel as special. Yeah, I don't know. The possibility of it adding to the experience. Yeah, I feel like nostalgic moments like that, like those little dopamine hits like you're talking about, they're almost better when they come at you unexpected.
Starting point is 00:51:31 Yes. Like when they catch you off guard. Could you imagine how excited you would have been, Jeff, if we were like, yeah, we're going to watch a movie. We're not going to tell you what it is. And it was Condor Man. And you had no idea. We just watched Condor Man one day
Starting point is 00:51:43 without you having any point of reference for it. Oh, dude, it would be like, I'd be like, are you fucking serious? Do you guys know I saw this when I was a kid? I love this movie. I remember going to the theater with my mom. We got ice cream. Yeah, no, it would have blown my fucking mind.
Starting point is 00:51:57 Absolutely. The first episode just came out where Nick has the laugh track. I liked it a lot. I listened to it and I liked it. What did you guys think? I liked it. I think a lot of the audience are like, we love it. And there's like
Starting point is 00:52:07 another 50% that's like, it's weird. It's distracting. So I don't know what to do. Keep it. Yeah, it's one of those things too where it's like, my informal tracking put it at like 70 positive 30 negative. Or maybe
Starting point is 00:52:24 even like 70 positive 30 negative or maybe even like 70 positive 20 negative 10 like ambivalent but i don't know yeah i don't know i i i personally enjoy it nick is so expressive too like i even heard not only laughs but i heard like a gasp or two yeah yeah i thought it added quite a lot it is sort of a weird just from a structure perspective of listening to somebody who's not i mean nick nick chimes in sometimes and that's awesome it's always great when he does but he's not regularly talking on the show but you're hearing his reaction to the show it's like a weird like between line of listening to somebody on a podcast who's not actually on the podcast but like you're listening to someone else listening,
Starting point is 00:53:05 almost like a Terrace House. Is that just because we can't hear him there? Because then he would be on the podcast, right? Yeah, I guess so. I think the fact that we can't hear him maybe creates that layer in my head. All right, for the next one, we have him unmuted so we can hear him
Starting point is 00:53:19 and we see if it changes the vibe. That could be interesting. That's interesting. I like that. Let's do that. Let's do that. Let's do that. And then there's not, like, two layers to this. Yeah, let's try that. I like that idea a lot. I hope.
Starting point is 00:53:32 I don't think it would be a good idea. I always liked Tough Crowd, which is this old Comedy Central show. They would have their audience mic'd in a way that wasn't always positive. So, like, frequently somebody would tell a joke and it wouldn't land at all and it would be very awkward in the moment.
Starting point is 00:53:46 Like the comedian would have to acknowledge like that they bombed as part of the show. She don't really get in like talk comedy formats all that much. I don't think we need to go that far, but I'd like to hear Nick laughing. It would be interesting to see how that adjusted. Maybe how we told stories.
Starting point is 00:54:01 It's the same as if as like on the Howard Stern show, you can hear people laughing in the background or like on ymh it's a i think it adds a certain texture to the show and kind of fills it out um i do think that our our being able to hear it will change our energy a little bit which will i think help and it's not like we just wheeled someone in nick is here for every recording yeah anyway fucking better better. What if we had a designated laugher who we don't know. They just join the call and then they record
Starting point is 00:54:31 their reaction. Andrew are you a big Colin Quinn fan? I like some of his work. I haven't seen any of his recent stuff but I like because you mentioned tough grad. He he has a new show on the Howard Stern series channel. Oh interesting. Like a talk show. I havenard stern uh serious channel oh interesting like a talk show i haven't heard it or anything but if you're a fan he does a really weird like almost essay style of
Starting point is 00:54:50 stand-up comedy where like his sets are like really narrative based in history at least the ones i've seen as far as like past in new york uh there was great colin quinn moment where he did you know like when people go on fallon or whatever and they do like they they pre-arrange what they're gonna say and they do their like little bit and then they throw to a clip he did you know like when people go on Fallon or whatever and they do like they prearrange what they're gonna say and they do their like little bit and then they throw it to a clip he did his little like set thing and they threw to the clip and it was the exact the clip was the exact material he used for his
Starting point is 00:55:16 little bit thing it was just the same thing doubled up like he didn't know what clip they were gonna use and so he did his like little set and they threw it to be like watch my special and it was the exact same material it just doubled up it's the most embarrassed I've seen a guest on
Starting point is 00:55:31 any of those shows he's just dead when they came back of like I didn't I didn't know this is oh that's awesome good book I had a embarrassing moment the other day where it's like another one of the situations where it's like i swear i'm a normal person but sometimes it just looks like i'm an insane person where uh this was like during the freeze and i had i was supposed to go to my therapy but i just decided to do it virtual um and then my internet went like i lost internet
Starting point is 00:56:01 because the weather i guess and just the whole street went off like i had to suddenly like pivot i was like oh shit because i'm already like 20 minutes into therapy and i didn't want to just like call it a day there because i still have to pay for the whole session so i text the guy and he was like oh yeah just phone me and i have no signal ever so i'm like scrambling around like time's ticking and i quickly just i'm like oh where are my shoes and in the end i just shoved on my like yard shoes i made some ugly shoes on a converse but I put them the wrong size they're too big so I just I just wear them like in the house or like in the yard or something like that so I just stuffed them on and I'm like
Starting point is 00:56:35 walking I'm like walking miles from my house I was probably walked a mile to get signal and then I called him again I've got 20 minutes therapy left at this point but these shoes don't fit me. And they started like rubbing halfway. So I'm like, oh, for Christ's sake. And then eventually I'm just like pacing around. Eventually get some signal I'm calling him. And I'm like finishing the end of my therapy.
Starting point is 00:56:55 You know, talking about some deep stuff, you know, getting pretty personal. And I'm kind of like bummed out. And then my freaking foot hurts. So I end up, I just took my shoe off. And I'm walking around and then at that point someone was like Gavin I was like oh hey oh no I was like he was like I love your stuff and I was like oh thanks man oh no can I have a selfie I'm like absolutely as I'm walking around with my shoe in one hand and my therapist in the other hand I'm like hold
Starting point is 00:57:23 hold on one second and i'm it's like a freaking maniac and i haven't showered or anything because i just like i didn't expect to be out and about and uh just i just don't know what to do in that situation i'm i love i'm always down to take the selfie like i've been asked in toilets and took them i don't it's not the best place i mean wait for me to come out but but I'll still do it. But that was the one where I was like, maybe I should say no on this one. I look like dog shit. I like a maniac who doesn't know where he is. Oh, my God.
Starting point is 00:57:52 I can't think of a worse place to take a selfie than in a therapy session. It was definitely a first. I really didn't expect it. I can't believe. With one shoe on. Dude, that's so funny i have i've had similar experiences because i always i can't think still i have to walk uh or ride a bike or something so i always walk in my neighborhood when i take my when i do my therapy uh and so i've had twice
Starting point is 00:58:19 dudes stop to say hi uh but nobody's asked to take a photo and every time i've had socks and shoes on and been like super comfy the weather must have been dog shit too right like it wasn't great it wasn't great nothing about it was great but um it was like all rainy and fucking wet and fucking icy probably yeah but hopefully that guy stays better and it's also a funny story oh man but yeah that's gonna be that's gonna be worse than the one i took in the bathroom at a convention center bathroom selfies i won't do it i say no let's wash our hands we'll go outside it's like it's one of those things where it's like i i could say like this is the work this is like not the place
Starting point is 00:59:03 to ask but i feel like the person already knows that and they're potentially worried that I'll just piss off the second I leave the bathroom so I kind of understand it so I don't I don't ever want to be like no I don't want to take the selfie of course of course yeah it's a weird exchange I think a therapy session I think just if you would have said to that person I can't I'm in a
Starting point is 00:59:20 therapy session right now just to see their reaction would have been great no you can't do that to that person though because that will that could cause like permanent damage to a person. Really? I think if I were in their shoes and I realized I
Starting point is 00:59:35 unintentionally interrupted somebody who's just walking on the street in broad daylight, right? With a shoe in his hand or whatever. Not looking terribly serious. If I interrupted that person and found out they were like deeply in a serious moment like that with a therapist, his hand or whatever, not looking terribly serious. If I interrupted that person, found out they were like deeply in a serious moment like that with a therapist, I would be so horrified. I would never talk to another stranger again.
Starting point is 00:59:52 Oh man, that's so interesting. Well, this is a person who is fine talking to someone who's already on the phone. So they've already got to that level. That's true. That's a good point. That is true. Imagine if they would have waited
Starting point is 01:00:04 for you to get off the phone. Although, although, did you have your AirPods in? No. Oh, so you were holding the phone to your head? No, no, no, because it was literally in my hand. Both my hands were full. Okay. That was like one of the funny parts of it.
Starting point is 01:00:18 Okay. Well, then, yeah, that's hard to forgive. That's pretty rude. I just quickly grabbed shoes and ran out the door. That's pretty rude. You ever see somebody on the phone uh yeah don't let them let them have their conversation it's fine it was funny it was very funny i can't yeah that's the all-time worst timing i feel like that was such a quick hour i'm bummed it's over. I'd love to see that selfie. I know. Yeah, I hope it gets tweeted to me. It just fucking flew by today, didn't it? I didn't even open my phone to look at notes.
Starting point is 01:00:51 Although I doubt I have any. I was so excited for this recording. For some reason, this last week just felt extra long. I think it was like Saturday when I was like, man, how is it not Thursday already? Felt pretty long for me too. I think next week we're doing two, right? And then we have an office
Starting point is 01:01:05 day potentially so we're gonna yeah yeah next friday next friday not potentially definitely well should we wrap this episode up do you have anything before we wrap oh i mean let me look at my notes i i ate indian food somewhat recently for the first time or no i hadn't had it in a long time i had like this big thing of butter chicken and i did like a two buy one get one free it's like a promotion type thing they were just opening i guess i don't know anyway i hadn't had it in a long time and i wondered if it would like fuck up my body like if i was gonna take a massive shit essentially from eating all this indian food uh i anticipate it then i had the second one the next day and I was like, oh man, this is going to be crazy. Then that night I realized I hadn't shit since having the food.
Starting point is 01:01:54 I think my body went into overtime. I had a bath, I fell asleep and I was texting with you at the time, Jeff, I woke up in the bath and i thought my body it was like the hardest it's ever been through i thought nine hours had passed i thought i had the deepest sleep of my life i thought i was a different person i was like i hope the people i hope my partner isn't worried that like i went miss like i have been gone a long time like i might be dead in their eyes and i looked at my phone 30 minutes it was a 30 minute i fell asleep for 30 i was so it's the most out of it i've been and i'm attributing it to the butter chicken it was delicious would highly recommend but my body just was like couldn't
Starting point is 01:02:38 i don't know i stopped shitting and i had the craziest nap of my life where i thought like i was a different person when i came up on the other side of it. So I guess I'd recommend butter chicken. You know what's weird? We all had butter chicken last night. We had Indian food last night. Really? Yeah. I didn't time travel or anything, but it was very good.
Starting point is 01:02:58 Maybe tomorrow. Maybe have a bath tomorrow. Listen, have you shit since you've had the butter chicken? I have. I've taken my customary three shits this morning all right okay well never mind your body's okay i uh speaking of speaking of uh indian food i really you know what i miss the most about my house what you sorely sorely miss after you get used to having it a fucking toto dude oh my god A fucking Toto, dude. Oh my God. Cold toilet seats? I forgot they existed. Really?
Starting point is 01:03:28 No gentle wash? Oh. Wow. It's been, I feel like I've been shitting in the Stone Ages for the last week. It's been fucking brutal. I never even think about my cold toilets. It's like I'm walking around with Fred Flintstone's prolapsed asshole because I'm just shitting like a caveman.
Starting point is 01:03:43 You should get one of those like ups the apc battery backups for your toilet i love the idea of the power going off and it's saying like oh you can shit with with a warm seat for the next 32 minutes it is the most important thing in this house oh my god well okay so you had to shit on a cold seat. I think a very important question that everybody's wondering, what is the sunglasses experience like on a cold seat as opposed to a warm seat? Is that, do you feel any less cool? Great question, dude. I couldn't even, I it's no, it's, it's creepy.
Starting point is 01:04:17 You can't do it. What do you mean? In a cold seat, you can't wear your sunglasses. That makes you a creep. Like, I mean a cold seat, like it's 30 degrees outside and you have no power in your house. That cold? Yeah. There's no sunglasses in that. It doesn't work together.
Starting point is 01:04:31 It feels inappropriate. I haven't been sunglass shitting a lot in the last week. I'll be honest with you. I did three times today. You should pick it up again. No, I'm back. Now that I'm home, I'm back. How do you never slip down in the bath and go underwater while you're asleep? How do I never slip down in the bath and go underwater while you're asleep? How do I never slip down in the bath? Because it's
Starting point is 01:04:47 a really narrow tub. I still can't. Okay. Imagine like me in that bathtub is like a cork half out of a bottle. It's not going anywhere. It's secured. It's suppressed on all sides.
Starting point is 01:05:04 You're not worried about it popping off it is locked in and is your head lent backwards or like onto your chest like it depends i will say last night last night i had a little little nice little nap and i was in more of a stretched out position and it caused the problem i I woke up because I adjusted and I water shot out the back. I've talked about before. We had some water drippage I had to get out to deal with all that mess. But I'm not going anywhere. It's safe.
Starting point is 01:05:34 I understand the concern. I couldn't be more strapped in. You're a bath cork. I'm a bath cork. Absolutely I am. God damn. Oh man. Speaking of strapping in... Eric's going to go hate shit. No, no.
Starting point is 01:05:50 I'm ending it, Eric. Don't worry. Speaking of... I just got two last things. Speaking of strapping in... No! New season of Survivor starts next month. Let's all watch it together.
Starting point is 01:05:59 Yeah. Okay. And stay on top of it. And I'm mostly saying that to Gavin, who can't manage to watch shit. We never... I don't think we talked about the end of the last season. I love the ending.
Starting point is 01:06:08 Wild. I thought the ending was great. It was a great season. Speaking of endings. Yeah, no, we should end this podcast. Speaking of ending this podcast, I was looking on Reddit today, and somebody posted this old Prank Wars video
Starting point is 01:06:20 from Mega64, with Gus and I and Mega64, 64 back in 2009 if you haven't seen it i encourage you to watch it first off i look amazing uh but so that you can see what appears to be a 12 year old eric madur he is so tiny and fresh faced he's like a little baby man i actually have a weird connection to that video that moment of your guys's response i was at that pax there was a the last panel of i think the night it happened was a griffball panel so i was at it and i was hanging out with you guys and i was there with my cousin and my cousin wanted to go back to the hotel so i had to go back with them but it was
Starting point is 01:07:03 around that time i i remember like you guys learning that they had done something to your booth and that you're going over to respond. Either you had already known and you're going over to fuck up their booth the way that you would the whole posters or you learn that they did something is one of the two. But I remember and I missed out. I could have been I could have witnessed you guys, I think, putting posters down. I'm very sad. It's my great regrets that I couldn't have been there for that. How about this? How weird is this?
Starting point is 01:07:29 Jeff and Andrew and Eric were all in the same fucking room at the same time in 2009 together. That's fucking... It's weird how long our lives have rotated around each other. I wonder if there was one where all four of us were. It would have to be a PAX. Yeah, no, PAX 2008. I wonder if there was one where all four of us were there. It would have to be at PAX. Yeah, no, PAX 2008. I don't know. I don't remember if Eric was at that one,
Starting point is 01:07:49 but I think you were at that one, Gavin. I was there. Eric, were you at PAX 2008? I'm looking it up right now. God, I don't remember. 2008. I definitely did 2007. I don't think you were in 2009, Gavin.
Starting point is 01:08:03 I don't remember you there for that one. Yeah, I don't remember you being there. I do remember that you were in 2009, Gavin. I don't remember you there for that one. Yeah, I don't remember you being there. I do remember that prank fights, though. No. I might have done PAX East. Maybe. Did you ever go to PAX East, Andrew? No. I've only been to PAX West as far as those conventions go. Andrew's a West Coast guy. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Bye. Okay, end it now.
Starting point is 01:08:20 I thought we were waiting to hear if you were looking at it. I don't know what you would have looked up to find that information to find out if he was there maybe he yeah I looked
Starting point is 01:08:29 I don't think I am I think it's the year before I went oh man yeah well still most of us were there yep way to blow it Gav
Starting point is 01:08:38 thanks for listening to F*** Face we'll see you next week was that it? did you end it? yeah he did he said thanks for listening to F*** Face that's it you wanna next week? oh he just? Did you end it? Yeah, he did. He said, thanks for listening to face.
Starting point is 01:08:46 That's it. Oh, he just said, that's it. Oh, I thought there was like, okay, nevermind. Okay. Goodbye. We got real quiet. Do the coolest reaction, Eric. Well, it's already.
Starting point is 01:08:54 Hey guys, you can follow us on Instagram and on Twitter at face pod. You can go to store. Roosterteeth.com. Support us directly. Buy a shirt, buy an insane fridge magnet that we're going to be putting out soon. Buy any number, any myriad of things that we have on the store i don't know why you're listening to this call to action the podcast ended a while ago can i ask one question and no no i know you're gonna say no can i just one quick question one really because i thought about this and i'm gonna
Starting point is 01:09:21 forget if i don't ask now i'm forget. Do we have more followers than Coolio on Instagram? Wasn't that a thing we were chasing? Did that ever happen? No, dude, he died. He bowed out of the competition. Well, no, that doesn't... He still has a follower count. You can't... We can't compete with a memory. Yeah, I think that
Starting point is 01:09:40 compete with a memory. We're not competing. I was just curious if that happened. It's not a competition. I was just curious. I don't know. I don't know. I'm not, we're not competing. I was just curious if that happened. It's not a competition. I was just curious. I don't know. I don't know. I hope not. I think we should, we should switch off Coolio.
Starting point is 01:09:50 I think he's, he's, he beat us. He won. Yeah. Yeah, you get, Andrew,
Starting point is 01:09:54 you have one week to decide who we're up against next. Oh, great. Okay. Yep. Thanks for listening.
Starting point is 01:10:00 Bye. Does Coolio have a kid? Okay, cut. Jesus Christ. Hey guys, Major League Fan Jack listening bye it's cool you have a kid okay cut hey guys major league fan Jack here with a look at next week's episode of face laugh track Nick is live the boys talk about throwing poop what is
Starting point is 01:10:17 regulation spoon size believe it or not Jeff has teeth issues again someone has a foot fetish and once once again, Andrew does not eat the pencil. All that and more on next week's episode of F*** Face.

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