Free With Ads - Empire Records

Episode Date: April 8, 2024

This week Jordan and Emily watch the 90's cult classic Empire Records, a movie about a group of misfit 90's kids working at an independent Delaware CD store.Visit Emily's ETSY store and buy some amazing matchbook paints created by the very talented artist Caitlin Alyse Riley (@king_margo)If you’re in the LA area, come to Golden Apple Comics on April 14th from 12pm-2pm. Jordan is signing a new Archie comic and also friends of the show Elliot Kalan, Casey Gilly, and Amy Chase will also be signing stuff! Come through!

Welcome Welcome to Free With Ads, the podcast that asks 90s kids the question, why pay Disney Plus eight bucks a month to help you remember your childhood when you can go on YouTube for free and watch Empire Records, the movie that reminds us that rock and roll peaked with the gin blossoms. I'm Jordan Morris. And I'm Emily Fleming. Today's movie is Empire Records, a flop in theaters. This movie became a cult classic on VHS and DVD.

It tells the story of a group of slacker record store employees trying to save their store from a giant corporation during the most holy day of the year, Rex Manning Day. That's right. You might notice that this podcast usually drops on a Tuesday, but it's dropped on a Monday this week because we saw the opportunity to release our Empire Records episode on the actual Rex Manning Day, April 8th. Happy Rex Manning Day, everybody. Happy Rex Manning Day. We'll be back to Tuesdays next week, but this is a special Monday episode, and we will be talking about this movie, which is, as of this recording, streaming free with ads.

But before that, we're going to talk about something else we saw on the internet for free this week. Other free stuff. Emily, I'll go first. It's time for another edition of our segment we've never done before, What's Matthew McConaughey Talking About? In this segment, we'll play something from Matthew McConaughey's social media and try to figure out what the fuck he's

talking about. A little bit of a background. I was talking to our mutual buddy Allison Becker not too long ago. I asked her what she was reading and she's like, okay bear with me. I'm reading Matthew McConaughey's autobiography. She's like, I'm listening to it on tape, on audio book, on tape.

I'm listening to it on audio book and it's mesmerizing. So I took her word for it. I got it from the library app. And Matthew McConaughey is a wild man. I think this is common knowledge, but like obviously a very compelling actor, is a wild man. I think this is common knowledge,

but like obviously a very compelling actor, but I think he desperately wants to be like a deep guy. I think he thinks like, I'm a bar stool poet. Give me some Jack and I'll be a cowboy philosopher. Have you ever tried to get through his Oscar acceptance speech? No. It's one of the worst things.

Like I can't get through it. I remember leaving the room when he accepted it. He won it for Dallas Buyers Club. Okay. And it was the most rambly, crazy thing I've ever watched. I'm sure.

The thing is, I mean, True Detective, it's like that was a role made for him. Right. The rambliest weirdo of all time. Right. With a heart of gold.

With a heart of gold. But he also tried to have a YouTube channel for a while. Did you? So this is where I've gotten today's clip. There's a Matthew McConaughey YouTube channel. It is worth a look. I love following him on social media. He does these kind of little inspirational nuggets.

And he's so compelling. He's these kind of little inspirational nuggets and he's so compelling. He's got that beautiful accent. He says these things with all the confidence in the world, but if you actually look at the text, I never have any idea what he's talking about. So, in this game, we're going to play something from Matthew McConaughey's YouTube channel and we're going to have to figure out

what the fuck he's talking about. Matt, would you play today's clip? Thank you. How are we going to do it if you really don't wanna dance by standing on the wall? Get your backs up off the wall. Yeah. A few minutes after Kool and the Gang

told us to do just that, we got reminded to get our hearts off the ground, our spirits in flight day and night, telling gravity to have a bit of a fuck-off. So, let's get our hips a-swigging

above the holes the moles be digging. Time to go to work, break a sweat. Time for me, you, and all the nations to get us some elevation. Ah, you should have said to take a shit. Roof is a man-made thing. Let's fly. Roof is a man-made thing. Let's fly. So what the fuck is he talking about? I don't know.

Any ideas? I really think it's just him leaning into the brand that he's created from Days and Confused. Yeah. Oh, absolutely. He's taken that and he's running with it. Which the fun thing about that, what a tie-in to Empire Records because there are multiple actors who were in Days of Confuse. Oh, okay. I didn't know there was crossover.

There is crossover. Yeah. So that's what is Matthew McConaughey talking about? The game you could never win because it is impossible to tell what Matthew McConaughey is talking about. Wait a minute. What do you think he's saying? I think he's rallying against limitations. I think he's rallying against limitations. I think he's encouraging you to think of your limitations as man-made, something you come up with so that you can elevate yourself.

But also, I don't know, he could just be talking about, like, picking up litter or something. Recycling! It's the philosophy of a man who was born hot and discovered just purely by being hot in like a grocery store. And who might be Woody Harrelson's biological brother. I believe it. But they refuse to get a fucking test. I think they know it's going to be negative and they like that.

I think they both know that that builds up their brand. And if they figure out for sure that it's not true, then they lose some capital. Yeah, I think he is a brand builder. I think Matthew McConaughey is a little more corporate than we think he is. I know. I know. He's like, I'm just a down-home boy sipping corn whiskey and throwing out my pappy's philosophy. No, you're not. You almost made me spit out my Coke Zero. Emily, what'd you see on the internet this week?

Okay, it's not that funny, and it's not like an audio clip or anything, but Tom Hardy entered a, like, this is from 2022, but I only saw this recently. In 2022, he entered a Brazilian jiu-jitsu open championship and beat everyone. Oh, finally, a chance to break out my Bane impression. No one's ever done one of these before. So immediately when I saw this, I thought it was a promo for Roadhouse. Oh, I was like, for sure he's in the new Roadhouse. Yeah, he's not. Which you've seen. I saw it.

You know, New Road. They were shooting for the right target. They just missed. There's some good stuff in it. Jill and I's pretty funny, but you can't recapture that magic, you know? Well, it's true, but it looks like it's like I saw the trailer. I didn't see it. But it looks like it's catering towards the Fast and Furious like kind of crowd. Yeah.

It focuses more on the action and not as much on the story, if that makes sense. And the Tai Chi. There's no Tai Chi in the movie. How do you have a Roadhouse movie without shirtless Tai Chi? Well, it's also, like, the Roadhouse, the original Roadhouse, which I love. Yeah, a classic. It love, is like hunks. But it's hunks with like, they have a... They're softer, more thoughtful hunks.

They are sensual hunks. Doesn't Patrick Swayze have like a PhD in philosophy in that movie or something? Something, but the comment, even in the trailer for the original Roadhouse, is like, you look a little small to be so tough. Jake Gyllenhaal ain't small in this movie. There's no underdog anything to this. But Patrick Swayze is a shorter guy, I guess. But then you got Sam Elliott, who's a pretty lean guy. He wasn't like big and jacked, but he was his right hand kind of guy.

And the two of them are like, it's mostly heart. Sure. Yes. It's not muscle. It's like, oh, women swoon at the thought of these two guys. The dudes I see in this, in the trailers for this, this ain't for us. This is for men. Yeah. The new roadhouse. You've got Conor McGregor in there. That ain't for me.

Yeah. I'm not ain't for me. Yeah, it's... I'm not watching that for him. Yeah, I think when I saw it, I was like, good try. Yeah. Good try. Good try. Well, it also... Better luck next time.

Oddly enough, I kept thinking... Better luck rebooting Demolition Man or something. What are you going to do next? Honestly, I would die. I would die. I mean, somebody give it a shot. I mean, I know we're all tired of reboots. I would love to see somebody take another whack at Demolition Man. I would die. I mean, somebody give it a shot. I mean, I know we're all tired of reboots. I would love to see somebody take another whack at demolition, man.

Nobody remembers that. But for me, I thought when I saw this, surely he's the villain in Roadhouse. Oh, right. Tom Hardy. When you saw Tom Hardy, his winning jujitsu competitions, not celebrity jujitsu competitions, just regular ones against regular jujitsu guys. I guess that Jake Gyllenhaal actually entered into some... MMA stuff.

Yeah, and then he did well. So when I saw this, I thought, oh, well, Tom Hardy must be in the reboot. But he's not. And also, I saw that the Roadhouse movie isn't going to be in theaters. Yeah, it is a straight to Amazon thing. And now I know why. It's Conor McGregor. Yeah.

Tom Hardy strikes me as somebody who just gets super into shit. I bet if you asked him about jujitsu next year, he'd be like, oh, I'm into chemistry now. I don't care about jujitsu anymore. I'm into chemistry now. Yeah, that seems right. Anyway, yeah. So that's the stuff we saw on the internet this week. We have a very special movie.

This is a movie that you have said, Emily, used to be your second favorite movie and is now perhaps your favorite movie. Yes. It's Empire Records. 1995. 1995. What a year. It's near and dear to both of our hearts, to both of our childhoods.

Yes. And we're excited to talk about it. I should mention at the top, there is a small self-harm plot line in this movie that we will mention. Yes. So if that's not the kind of content you want to hear, we'll give you a minute to skip to the next episode. And on the other side of this music, we will talk about Empire Rack. We're back. It's Free With Ads. Today's movie is Empire Records.

Before we talk about what's actually in the movie, let's check in about our histories with the movie. Okay. So this is an all-timer for you. When did this movie come into your life? So it was a sleepover. Okay. So this is an all-timer for you. When did this movie come into your life? So it was a sleepover. Yep. This movie came out when I was nine. But I don't think I saw it until I was like 11 or something.

But I saw it at a slumber party, and every single girl at the slumber party, we were all instantly enamored. And as soon as the movie ended, we made a fake record store. Oh, my gosh. In this girl's parents' house and played record store. Wow. And, like, I can't remember what character I was.

I think I always end up volunteering to be the thing that nobody wanted to be, so I'm pretty sure I was Warren. You were Joe, the old drummer. I was Warren. And I ran in and was stealing stuff. And then everyone else got to humiliate me. And like, you know, the shoplifter. But yeah, and I was obsessed.

It was the first movie that made me want to get a job. I don't know. Something about the movie made me go, oh. Oh, me too. Mm-hmm. I don't know. Something about the movie made me go, oh. Oh, me too. Oh, totally. And I think I was interested re-watching this because I was like, oh, I had always assumed these characters were like in college. Yeah, I know.

Me too. I guess I kind of missed the plot line where they're like, oh, they're in high school and they're picking colleges. And I'm always like, this is what it's going to be like to be in my 20s. Well, I think some of them are not in high school. Right. But the main characters are kind of in high school. Like the ones who are our main people.

So I remember seeing trailers for this movie and being stoked. Yeah. Because I loved record stores. I loved hanging out in record stores. And then I was stoked to see the movie. And then it felt like it never came out. And I think what actually happened is it came out in like two theaters for a weekend. It tanked. And then, you know, just just kind of got dumped onto video. And then I remember seeing it in the video store. I'm like, oh, there's that movie that never

came out. Yeah, I rented it. I loved it. And I think I kind of after that, after sitting down and watching it, it was just like a movie that someone put on when we were hanging out. Right. Like I think it is described as a hangout movie. But to me, it was actually just a movie that was on while you were hanging out because it's got that amazing soundtrack. It is all vibes. Yes. And so, yeah. So to me, I remember like chunks of this movie better than I remembered the actual thing. Like what happens. And I think we'll talk about this later because we weirdly watched two different cuts of the movie. Oh my God. And so the theatrical cut, wonderful vibes, impeccable vibes. There's some shit that just does not make sense in it. And I was really shocked at like the logic of this movie being so weird. And it's like, it doesn't really matter.

That's not exactly why you're watching it. But I was interested in the fact that, like, oh, some of this doesn't make sense, and it's because it was cut up by the studio in a weird way. There were a lot of, like, apparently, there were a lot of characters that were cut out. Like, Tobey Maguire. Tobey Maguire was supposed to be in this movie.

And then he, like, it was at the height of his drinking problem, and he requested to be cut out of it, went to rehab. And he's been sober ever since. So Empire Records, I guess, could be responsible for the sober Spider-Man that we know him to be now. I want to mention one thing. So at the dawn of the internet for me, which was like, I guess, late sixth grade, seventh grade, my favorite website was movie-list.com. And it's where you could watch any movie trailer.

Oh, hell yeah. And you could also get links to all these fan sites. I remember downloading QuickTimes of movie trailers. Yes. And watching them with my friends as entertainment. Yes, you'd have another tab. Let's watch Ice Age again. Yeah, you'd have another tab.

But the Empire Records, it's where I watched Virgin Suicides trailers over and over again. Oh, yeah, sure. But then the Empire Records page on Movie Dash List, I don't know, Matt, can you see if Movie Dash List still exists? Checking right now. Oh, my God. The movie does have BTE, big trailer energy.

The movie is kind of just a long trailer. I also want to note that the poster, which is pretty iconic with Liv Tyler in the front and everything. Oh, yeah. There's a dog in the poster with headphones on. There ain't no dog in the movie. And it made me go. People probably felt so betrayed.

That's why it tanked. People were like, where's this dog who likes music? Where's the fucking dog? Where's the dog? To be honest, yeah. There should have been a dog in this movie. Couldn't agree more. But movie-list.com, they have links to all of these fan sites that would talk about the edited clips and missing characters. And there was always this mention of Lily, this character who wore rollerblades and knee pads and stuff like that, which they mention on sites.

It was a teen movie in the 90s. There had to be someone on rollerblades. Well, there's photos of her from behind, but there's no photos of her face. Interesting. I still don't know who the fuck this chick is, and I also didn't try. So there are- Movie Dash List still exists. Wow.

What's on the front page of Movie Dash List? exist wow what's on the front page of movie dash list unfortunately the front page uh is all porn march 13th uh uh 2019 good boys okay good boys so i think uh somewhere they're still paying to keep that site up yeah they're just paying to keep it up um another website that i loved at that time is happy hentai.com if you could check and make sure that exists. Right. What's on there? Get a good firewall going. It's just the Ice Age trailer, weirdly.

Matt, can we, Matt, we're going to chat. See about buying Movie-List and maybe we can get it and have it redirect to our show. Absolutely. All right. We're going to get Movie-List. My favorite website. So, yeah. So, this is interesting. So, on YouTube, where to get movie dash list. My favorite website. So yeah. So this is interesting.

So on on YouTube where we watch this movie, there are two versions. There is the legal version that YouTube has uploaded to free with ads, which is like if you go on YouTube and look for free with ads movies, this is the version you get, which is like a director's cut. I don't know. You watched a longer director's cut. I watched the theatrical cut, which I think we discovered is like a director's cut. I don't know what the fuck it is. So you watched a longer director's cut. I watched the theatrical cut, which I think we discovered is like a sneaky illegal upload and we don't support that.

It was an accident. We do not. I promise. But I think it will be interesting to see what was different from the theatrical to the director's because I think people are, you know, most people probably saw the theatrical. Oh, and I watched both. Hell yeah. Okay.

So let's talk about Empire Records, shall we? Yay, I'm so happy. It starts with Lucas. He is in a turtleneck. He's wearing a leather jacket. He has a bowl haircut, and he couldn't look better. Lucas is great. He's kind of like a philosopher-y guy.

Shaman. Maybe some McConaughey energy coming off this guy. Oh, very good. I will say now, I think everything Lucas says is funny. The quotes off this guy oh very good i will say now i think everything lucas says is funny this guy's quotes off this guy yeah we do have favorite quotes later in the movie but i didn't pick any of his because there's too many they're great and i noticed i read a little like buzzfeed you know an oral history of empire records and all of the like chapter titles are just Lucas quotes. He's terrific. Yes.

He is and he has the responsibility of counting out the money at the end of the day. This is huge for Lucas. Their boss Joe gave them three rules.

Don't touch my cigars, my booze, or my drums. We cut to Lucas. Drumsticks. Drumsticks. What is he doing? He's smoking cigars

and playing the drums. We love this little stinker, don't we? I did. The first difference I would like to note is in the opener, he does everything wrong. He finds out that there's potential for Empire Records to be corporate-atized. To become a music town. A music town. We hate music town!

Damn the man! Fuck music town! Save the empire! But anyway, so he finds that out, and in the theatrical version, he just decides to take the money from the safe, go to Atlantic City, and try to save Empire Records. Right. In the free with ads cut that you can watch right now that I don't know why the fuck YouTube uploaded this version. There's this random lady that Lucas lets into the store that is basically his like spiritual guide to get him to go to Atlantic City. And he lets her in after close. She's a horny lady who's married to a tow truck driver.

Yeah. Wow. OK. But this is the line that inspires him. Do you think the story is already written? Or do you think a bold and courageous act can change the course of history? So. Oh, wow.

That's weird. That's my back tattoo. I never knew that quote was from this movie. So he goes to Atlantic City and this is weird because he meets a different horny woman. Yep. Hot. He's at the craps. So this is, I think, this is like the girlfriend at the time of one of the executives. Really? Yeah. Who they put into the movie. And I think she's kind of great.

She is a babe. She is great. And she has this very weird line. Matt, can you play this? This is him at the craps table with her. Right. Throw it and get a seven? That would be very good, sir.

Feeling lucky? I'm guided by a force much greater than luck. Seven, a winner! Baby, you are sex. I know. Baby, you are sex. I know. Baby, you are sex. I know that line by heart. You think that was the line in the script,

or is that a mistake that they just left in? No, that feels deliberately written. Okay. They were trying to make that happen. That was their version of fetch. Right. And to this day, we still tell our loved ones, baby, you are sex.

He loses. I think you are money was around the same time and people were like, this is going to be our, your money, baby. Yeah, you're sex, baby. Sex and money. Yeah.

Also, I want, so this is in Atlantic City is where he does this. So it makes me go, where is this record store set? Yeah, I kind of, it feels a little east coasty to me but yeah obviously in north carolina oh interesting so i don't know where they were setting this but i assume it's new jersey or something i don't know that sounds about right so so he loses everything at the craps table i love how everybody including this babe is just

mean to him immediately they hate him now that he doesn't have money. He used to be cute. I remember she says that to him. And he says the great line, I wonder if I'll be held responsible for this. So fucking good. So, yes, he has lost all the store's money. He was trying to save them from becoming a music town. Fuck music town. Damn the man. We hate music town.

Save the empire. Back at the store. It's Rex Manning Day. We will learn what that means later, but all the employees are preparing for Rex Manning Day. Renee Zellweger and Liv Tyler are on their way to work. Liv Tyler, she's an overachiever. She made cupcakes. And we learn that she wants to lose her virginity to Rex Manning.

And also we get the Gin Blossoms needle drop. Yeah. Beautiful. Also, Rex Manning, our cool writer. What's this guy's name? Max Eckhart? Quickly becoming a Free With Ads favorite. Yes. Yes.

I do have some thoughts on him that I will share when we get to his entrance. So, yeah. So, back at the store, we have a kind of main character-y guy that I'm just calling Hairdrapes Guy. He has the 90s hair drapes. He's got a vintage sweater. I don't know if he was supposed to be the main character. He doesn't do a ton in this movie,

but he just kind of feels, he has main character energy. Who are you talking about? I'm talking about the guy who's in love with Liv Tyler, but he can't. Oh, you mean AJ? I mean AJ. How dare you? I'm sorry. I didn't know. Yeah, anyways.

When we get to Hunkwatch I will scold you. So AJ is kind of like the romantic lead. He's in love with Liv Tyler. He doesn't know how to tell her. Then we get one of our many, many fucking perfect clean cleanup montages.

Yeah. They play a banger of a 90s song, usually by a band that did that song and nothing else. I think this first one is by a band called Queen Sarah Saturday, who was like impossible to find on streaming. It sounds a little bit like Jawbreaker. I think this was like a post-Green Day thing where they were trying to sign a lot of punk bands. Yeah.

Not a lot of these bands stuck around. Which also, the soundtrack for Empire Records, one of the best soundtracks of all time. It's great. But it doesn't even scratch the surface of the songs that are in this movie. Yeah, the soundtrack is weird. And I was listening to it in the car on the way over.

I listened to it. It is a great listen. So good. But the songs in the movie don't really match it in the car on the way over. I listened to it. It is a great listen. So good. But the songs in the movie don't really match up to what's on the album. Yep. I mean, obviously the banger of the movie is Sugar High, but the version on the soundtrack does not include Renee Zellweger singing. Fucking shame.

Very weird. Anyway, so yeah, we get the cleanup montage. We're kind of meeting everybody else in the store. Ethan Embry is there. His name is Mark, and he talks a little bit about wanting to start a band, and he's going to call it Mark, but he's going to spell it with a C. Yeah. Now, Emily.

Yes. I'm going to come down very positive on this movie. Okay. It's okay if you're hard on it. I have a few criticisms. That's okay. It is near and dear to me. Okay. It's okay if you're hard on it. I have a few criticisms. That's okay. It is near and dear to me. Okay.

But I do have some notes. Uh-huh. I love Ethan Embry. I'm being very delicate here. You hate this character. I think he's so annoying. I'm so annoyed by Ethan Embry in this movie. I love That Thing You Do.

I love Can't Hardly Wait. Okay. I'm not upset with you. Emily, please put down that knife. Please. It's just the littlest knife I have. I know, but I'm scared. It's my baby knife.

Okay. Okay. You can hold it. She's just making us a nice cucumber salad. Oh, okay. I couldn't see that from the other side of the booth. She's chopping a cucumber. But the cucumber is a penis.

I'm kidding. Cool. So I watched this movie every few years. And honestly, my opinion on which characters I love and everything changes every time. His character is, it's not great. Yeah. So he's great. I think, yeah, no, and I like Ethan Embry.

And I think like all of these like 90s teen movies had to have a hyper guy. He's hyper. Well, the fun thing about him is that he, I think, introduces a lot of music. Yeah. So he's the one who's really passionate about music. He gets you hyped up when certain songs come on. He's the one who talks about music the most. Yeah.

Whereas a lot of people don't talk about music so he's yeah no that's a good point your guide to the actual record store yeah um but he also just seems like this weird quirky um just weird guy that his actions don't make sense yeah like when he almost kisses this ballerina. That's very weird. Like who's listening to music. And he's like horny for no reason. Then he gets stoned for no reason. Like his actions don't make sense.

But he does spice it up. He adds color. Yeah. And he's trying. He's really trying. Also, he's hella cute. He's so cute. That orange soccer jersey that you definitely wore from YMCA basketball or soccer.

I want that shirt. Yeah. And his hair is so cute. He's so cute. He is. And I think what happened is I bet they told him to riff. And I think he's probably just a good actor. But some people can riff and some people can't.

And I think he was just doing some, because a lot of it seems just like off the dome and like sometimes he'll say something and it doesn't sound like he's responding to the person talking to him. Right. So I think it was just maybe like they got super into the idea of improv. Maybe it was because they heard

there was improv in swingers. Vince Vaughn just made all that up. And then it's like, you need to improv now because Vince Vaughn did it you know and I think that's just not his line well I also think that there's another character Eddie yeah who there's a lot of like Berko and Eddie so many people

work at this store are these characters and none of them are ever in the store working it's very weird they're always in the back also I think something that happened in the edit of this movie I read is that it was originally supposed to take place over two days and it something that happened in the edit of this movie I read is that it was originally supposed to take place over two days, and in the edit, it's one day. So I think

the people coming and going so weirdly is probably part of that. I think just they took scenes from the various days. It's definitely more exciting to be one day. Oh, sure. I like that. I mean, I like a one-day movie. It's true, but I think Eddie is one of our big... There's a lot of stonery characters.

There are. Okay, so. A lot of kind of samey, goofy, doody stoner guys. But it makes sense, like they're in a record store,

but Mark is a kind of stonery, fun, youthful character. I'd say he's probably the youngest character. You're probably right. He seems the youngest. And then you've got Eddie,

who, heart of gold stoner, super adorable, never knew a hairbrush in his life. Yeah, there's gum in Eddie's hair. Oh, yeah, for sure. That's been there for a while. But in the first moment you see Eddie, he's trying to school Ethan Embry's character on music.

Right. Because he's worried about him. He thinks his music taste is bad. He's like, I heard what you were doing and like uh it's like some crazy stuff man so i made you this tape and a bunch of pot brownies oh right and they're trying to chill him out or something i think there are scenes that are cut out about mark's character yeah trying to start a band and i do think it's odd that he didn't play in Sugar High when he's the guy who's trying to start a fucking band. It's so weird.

So, yeah. So we see a little snippet of a Rex Manning video. He's the guy who's going to be doing a signing at the store. He is an older pop star. I think he's supposed to be kind of like a Tom Jones or something like that or a Robert Palmer. I'm kind of thinking he's like a Chris Isaac. Oh, sure. Yeah, that's another good analogy. Like a Wicked Game like that. Yeah. Or a Robert Palmer. I'm kind of thinking he's like a Chris Isaac. Oh, sure. Yeah, that's another good analogy.

Like a Wicked Game type thing. Yeah. He's got a kind of a fringy Western shirt and he's got like very quaffed kind of grief. It's a puffy shirt. It's a puffy shirt. He's got kind of greaser hair. Robert Palmer is a good comparison. Yeah.

So they play a video, which I guess they shot an entire video for this. Well, they apparently, I read something about how they only wanted to shoot like I don't know, 15 seconds. Right. But the crew was having so much fun with it that they shot a whole bunch. Yeah. Because he was so funny. So yeah, he's

kind of like cavorting around with these very like 90s waifu looking models. It's very funny. The song is Say No More, Mana More. It's very cheesy. The song is Say No More, Mauna More. It's very cheesy. Oh, there it is. There it is. It's so good.

Actually, I love this song. It's good. Here's how it goes. So Liv Tyler, she's at the front and center of the poster. I feel like she was probably the big name because she was in those music videos for Aerosmith. Aerosmith videos. Which, weird story, the guy who plays Berko, who is Coyote Shivers, the musician, was married to Liv Tyler's mom. I know.

She had to be in this movie with her stepdad. Her stepdad, who was pretty much like, I don't know, in the same age range as her. I've got a great stepdad. I like going to Black Angus with him. I don't want to be in a movie with the guy. I love it when he pays at the Black Angus. Fucking weird. Anyway, so she and, I mean, Renee Zellweger, fucking class.

They have such great chemistry together. They're like besties. So Renee Zellweger is my favorite character. After watching this, both versions, multiple times, she's my favorite character. Okay. For a long time, it was Liv Tyler. You want to be Liv Tyler. She's the aspirational character.

Like, she's going to Harvard. She's a sweet girl. Right. She bakes cupcakes. Yeah. And she's a nice girl. She has a cute boy who's trying to tell her he loves her. She is chaste. Like when I saw it as a young girl, that was the girl. And now I'm like, this chick is a fucking cunt. Like I don't like I'm Renee Zellweger all the way. Okay. Good sense of humor. Just, you know, I like her a lot. Anyway, so, like, Liv Tyler's character is a closeted speed freak. She's, like, got to be perfect. Her dad says she's got to get into Harvard, calculus, blah, blah, blah. Yeah, this is, her speed plot line mirrors a certain Jessie Spano from Saved by the Bell.

Yes, very, very true. She has a little necklace where she keeps her pills, her pet pills, and she's doing pills so she can get into Harvard. She's not having fun while doing them. And in the theatrical version, nobody ever knows if she gets into Harvard. But in this version on Free With Ads, there's an additional character that was cut out of the main, like of the theatrical version. It's her little dorky sister on a bicycle who arrives to deliver the letter from Harvard. But the best part is Renee Zellweger's cunty character, Gina's interaction with that little girl.

Gina, I got to find Corey right away. Paging, Miss Corey Mason. Please meet your smelly sister in the rotunda. Dad says to bring this here right away and wait to see what's in it. It's Harvard. She's so breathy. I know.

It's Harvard. I was just doing a cleanup's Harvard I was just doing a clean up montage I was just dancing around the I was just dancing around to semi-sonic

and dusting I was readjusting my mohair sweater there's so many hairballs exhausting so but she gets in

and so she's in Harvard you know everybody's excited and it's the other thing is you don't like apparently her and AJ are best friends, but there's no indication that they're best friends at all. Yeah, I think this is a this is a this is a part of the movie that I think I think there's this problem with a lot of teen movies.

Right. It's like characters are in love because there's the they're the main characters. And I think they don't show them like connecting. they're the main characters. And I think they don't show them, like, connecting. And I think, like, as teens, we're developing our ideas about relationships and forming likes and stuff. And I think in these movies, it would be cool if you showed characters connecting

and like, hey, you should, you know, it's good to date people who you have stuff in common with and you connect with. Right. But it's kind of just like people like each other in these movies just because, like, we're the two stars of the movie and I have to be with you. Well, okay, so here's why I love Empire Records

is there is no main star of the movie. It is a true ensemble cast. Every single person in this movie has an amazing like character. They give them a full fleshed out. The lady who wrote this worked at a Tower Records. Yeah. So this is like based around her experience working there.

So all of these characters I think are very fully fleshed out. I think, but the connections and stuff don't always make sense. And again, this might be stuff that was cut out of the movie. Oh, for sure. But what I think is, AJ is so hot that girls watching it, they want to fuck him. So they're like, of course she wants him. Sure, right. Like, of course he's the heartthrob.

Yeah, we don't need to see a reason. Yeah. They just do. Yeah, of course. Look at those hotties. They just want to fuck each other. Why wouldn't you want to fuck AJ? Right.

He's so hot. Well, everyone in this movie is so hot. Mm-hmm. But also, white. Like, everybody is white in this movie is so hot. But also white. Like everybody is white in this movie. Sure. Which this is a movie that it makes just so much sense to have so many different like types of people from different backgrounds because it's about music. Yeah, I know.

And it really shows how little people thought about that, you know. It's true. Up until, I don't know, four months ago. Yeah, they're still not doing it. Yeah, I know. But it just feels like such a missed opportunity. Totally. And if there is a like a reboot, which they're trying to reboot it as a musical on Broadway. Oh, maybe I don't know.

And it went into development hell, I guess, because of covid. But I really hope that if they remake this as a movie again, that's exactly the direction it should have been in in the first place. But anyway, AJ, wanna fucky, mommy likey, please give me daddy. Does that mean he's your top list on the Hunk Watch? He's in a tie. With who? Joe.

Oh, okay. You know what, Matt? I was going to get to this a little bit later, but it sounds like we're knee deep into Hunkwatch. Yeah! It's Hunkwatch. I'm going to address some things we talked about in our Grease 2 episode. Uh-huh. I didn't love our dude's performance in Grease 2.

I thought he was very- What dude? Max Eckhart. Oh, you're talking about Rex Manning's performance in Grease 2? He was my Hunkwatch in Grease 2. I thought he was very- What dude? Max Eckhart. Oh, you're talking about Rex Manning's performance in Grease 2. Yes. He was my hunk watch in Grease 2. He didn't hunk for me just because I thought he was such a tabula rasa. He was just a drawing of a man that they put in front of the camera periodically who had

never had an emotion. I think he's great in this. He's so good. He's so funny. He is, he does straddle that line because he has to be a cheese ball, right? Right, right. Like everybody mocks him in the movie, but you also have to kind of understand why Liv Tyler and Renee Zellweger want to have sex with him.

And why he was a big star in the first place. And why he was a big star. And I think he does a great, he is so good in this. And I think does a great job of being. It's a fucking killer part. It is. It's awesome. Yeah.

So yes, I'm proud of our guy for coming so far. So Rex Manning, Max Eckhart, he is my hunk watch. It's so amazing. But let's talk about Joe. Joe is the manager. He is like. The heart of the whole movie. Okay.

I think. As somebody who. Big dad energy coming off Joe. Oh. Okay. I think as somebody who Big Dad energy coming off Joe. Oh my God. I would do anything for this man. I would literally do anything for him. As somebody who worked in retail quite a bit and feels like I've

lived my Empire record fantasy. Yes. I worked in a store in New York for a few years and I had a manager who was a lot like this guy, who, like, had, he was just, cared about people, would pull you aside and be like, is everything okay? Like, just a good, like, he cares about everyone so much, even though an employee has blown all his money in Atlantic City. Yes. And he's constantly trying to figure out, do I give this employee to the cops or do I keep trying to figure out my situation? And meanwhile, every employee is melting down.

Literally every single employee at Empire Records, their life is a shithole. Emily, did you have a Joe? Did you have a work dad? Yes, I had a Joe. And yeah, so I don't know. And I was in love with them too. I worked a little bit of retail. I had two seasonal retail jobs in high school and college.

It was Play Company, which was a toy store. It was a little chain. I don't know if they're around anymore. And then Nordstrom. So I worked like seasonally at Nordstrom. You worked at Nordstrom. I don't know if they're around anymore. And then Nordstrom. So I worked like seasonally at Nordstrom. You worked at Nordstrom? I worked at Nordstrom. Kids wear boys.

That is not an easy job. Yeah, it was tough. You get commission, which is nice. Yeah, but it's department store. Yeah. You got to fight with other parts of the department. That's true. A lot of folding too.

Although I kind of liked the folding. I do like folding. It was kind of meditative. Did you get the boards? What are those? Folding boards. No. You just get a board.

I could have had a board? Yeah. Oh, man. They fucked me. They fucked me. Fuck them. I'm never shopping at Nordstrom or the Rack. I mean, it's basically the size of a clipboard.

Oh, yeah? You just put it in the middle of the shirt and I'll show you. It made things easier. So I will say that my retail experiences were very tame. I never kind of like had this de facto family in my retail. Yeah. At Play Company, there was a guy named Dave who talked about being in a band. Always a Dave.

They were called, we never saw evidence of this band, right? Okay. But he told us they were called the Slim Pixies. No. And he would like, he would talk about like going to band practice and stuff, but we like never heard it or saw him do a show or anything.

Matt, we don't have to do this now. See if The Slim Pixies ever became a band. I'm going to check them out. I'm going to check them out. It's like Slim Pickens. Yeah. Slim Pixies.

Right. And then there's also The Pixies. So yeah, it was maybe a combination of those things. They're diet pixies. Right. These pixies are too fattening frank black and kim deal have too many calories oh my god um so yeah and then uh and i

never had any kind of like hook up with anybody i worked with in retail i did and so yeah i at one time at nordstrom there was a girl I thought was cute I think we were around 16 I don't think I asked her out but I think I did a thing where I'm like

do you want to see a movie after work like a half thing and she said yes and then the next day she's like

my dad said I can't go and then that was kind of the end of it classic excuse I know I think she probably didn't want to go but honestly if it were me that would have of the end of it. Classic excuse. I know. I think she probably didn't want to go.

No, I mean, but honestly, if it were me, that would have been the truth. Yeah. Because I was not allowed to go anywhere. Listen, I'm not so mad about it. I'm not so mad about it. People are saying I am, but I'm not. I'm just saying Mike Fleming would have probably told you to fuck off. And I probably had a weird movie choice in the heart.

Like, you want to see the Hudsucker proc scene? Oh, my God. Then my dad would have said, yes, you can go. choice. I'm like, you want to see the Hudsucker proc scene? Oh, my God. Then my dad would have said, yes, you can go. Yeah. I'm coming with you. By the way, gentlemen, as of right now, Oh, Brother, Where Art Thou? is free with ads. Oh, my God. Get yourself over to the tube.

Just saying, if it's still free with ads, let's fingers fucking cross. You should watch it. I looked up Slim Pixies. Yeah. And Google says, did you mean Slim Pickens? I knew it. Google Dave who Jordan worked with. Okay, I'll Google Dave.

You got it. At Play Company. You don't remember the guy's last name? I don't remember Dave's last name. Dave, if you're out there, send us that Slim Pixies demo tape. Okay, update. It said that he quit the band, but then he bought a website called movie-list.com.

I hate you. We have to fight Dave in a battle of the bands. Alright guys, we got a week to come up with the band. Damn it. Emily, you'll sing. Matt, play the tambourine. I'm gonna hit this xylophone. Fuck.

Emily, you have more thoughts on Joe. Yeah. We're going to take a break, and then we're going to come back. We're back. It's Free With Ads. Emily, you had some more thoughts you wanted to share about work dad Joe. Okay, moving on. Thank you for those thoughts.

Just a moan. He like drums to an ACDC song. Oh my God. One of the fucking coolest moments in the movie. It's great. It's kind of a- And they turn on the loudspeakers so everyone can hear him drumming and everyone- There's a lot of fun dancing in this movie. It's like-

The dancing's great. The fantasy of working in a record store. Yeah. It's so- We'll always be dancing. There's a little mosh pit in the aisles. God, so cool. But yeah, he's letting off steam because There's a little mosh pit in the aisles. God, so cool. But yeah, he's letting off steam because he's about to lose the store.

He's been trying to save this store and all the little rejects that are his employees. And then Lucas fucks it up. Lucas fucks it up. He gets all sweaty and plays the drums to ACDC and it's so sexy. But he's also got this sexy kind of, it's a butt cut, you know, it's like down the middle, kind of long. Him and AJ have a similar haircut.

I picked this photo of them together, and it looks like death. Oh, it looks like father and son. It does. But anyway, he's so hot because he- Come here, son, let me tell you how to let your hair just dangle over your eye a little bit. They're both so fucking hot. But he's the hottest person.

Kiss your son. Kiss your son on the mouth. But he's truly the glue of the movie. And he's like, you know, he's the boss that you wish you had that cared about you. Yeah. I mean, he, I don't know, he has time for everyone, even though he's the only grown-up in the whole movie. He's the only one with any responsibility. And everyone's fucking him over, but he cares so much about everybody who works there.

He does beat up Lucas later, but it's for his own good. Well, he fucking deserves it. It's for his own good. Because Lucas is fucking back-talking. Lucas is back-talking. He's such a little piece of shit. Listen, Lucas, everything you say is funny. That's no reason to backtalk.

Yeah. He's also like, where is, I remember him saying this line. He's like, what am I going to do with this guy? Who's he going to go to when he needs bail? Yeah. It's pretty clear that all of these kids don't have good home lives, that he's kind of the person that is everyone's- They are their found family.

He's probably their emergency contact. But my favorite moment of his daddy thing is when he checks on Deb. Yeah, let's actually... We have a couple characters we haven't mentioned yet. One is Deb. She's gothy. She comes in and she shaves her head.

Yes. I like that there's a barber quality shaver in their work bathroom. Yep. Just in case somebody wants to shave their head. Which actually when I worked in a menswear store, there was one. Was there? Oh, yeah. I had a locker at the menswear store where I worked with tons of extra clothes

because I was a slut. Hmm. And I had razors. I shaved my legs in that bathroom. Wow. Okay. But there was an electric razor because it was mostly dudes who were there. Sure.

So I never used it, but it was there. So that's Deb. Deb is a cutter. She has like bandages on her arms. Robin Tunney. Robin Tunney from The Craft. Also plays a cutter in The Craft. Oh my gosh.

That's right. So we meet her and then we meet, what is Coyote Shivers' name? By the way, if your name is Coyote Shivers, just call him that in the movie. I agree. No need to give this guy a new name. My favorite thing is when you see him because there's the back of the record store and there's like this kind of like makeshift tiny home situation. Yeah. Made up. And he lives in this shed behind the record store.

Is this in the extended cut? I think it's in both. But it's like. That's funny. Yeah. I didn't pick up on that. It's like he's, I don't pick up on that like he it's like he's I don't know like in uh Eureka's Castle he just kind of like pops out like he's the

moat monster that he lives in this little shack that's wild and with his guitar in tow so that yeah it's so interesting I uh so I guess this part was originally supposed to be Billy Joe Armstrong from Green Day no way so that final song High, could have just been a Green Day song. And then Liv Tyler was like, my dad. Yeah. He's here. My mom's boyfriend wants to be in the movie. Can we put my mom's boyfriend in the movie?

Oh, he's so lame. Yeah. So these are like the last two employees. There's a lot of employees. We start going over the music town. God, I hate music town. Damn the man. Fuck, I hate music town. Damn the man. Fuck, I hate music town.

Save the empire. We run about their dress codes, and to roast the dress code, Renee Zellweger comes out wearing just the apron. This is one of the core images of my childhood. Oh, yeah. Is that your hunk watch? Yes, sure. I think so. I mean, I wanted to talk about Max.

It's Jordan's hunk watch. I wanted to talk about Max. It's Jordan's hunk watch. Yeah. I wanted to talk about Max Eckhart's glow up. But yes, I mean, this is one of the hottest things to ever happen in any movie ever. We were texting a lot the other night and annoying Matt because he has a child. And I feel bad about that. I was drunk and I had a 7-Eleven pizza and I was eating it in bed watching the movie. And I was saying, I love this podcast so much.

I'm so happy. I love this movie. I had no problem with it. I got you guys on mute. I'll check these tomorrow. No, Matt immediately texts. He goes, we're doing this show days from now, right? And I was like, oh, okay.

I'm sorry. I'm texting too much. Let's do the podcast now. Shut up the mics. Mama's ready to go. It wasn't too much. Let's do the podcast now. Shut up the mics. Mama's ready to go.

But my favorite thing about this movie is the relationship between Renee Zellweger's character and Robin Tunney's character. Because- Yeah, they have great back and forth. Great back and forth, because it seems like Deb's character hurts Liv Tyler's character's feelings all the time,

but it's almost like, so Gina is Renee Zellweger's character. Deb is Robert and they both have lived kind of a hard life. Their moms are either dead or missing, but they understand each other. And they have this back and forth kind of sparring. I could have watched them do this shit through the whole movie. I would have wanted a whole movie with just the two of them. And so. Yeah.

The like the like plotting of this movie is is such a mess. Probably be mostly because of editing. But also it's the day in the life of working at a record store. Yeah. And I would say like with with as like weird as the plotting is like the minute-to-minute dialogue is so good. So good! It goes a long way with me. I would rather have

good dialogue than a tight plot. Ideally, you have both, but yeah, the back and forth between people, that's not Rift, is so fun to watch. This writer is great with dialogue.

I know. Yeah, I didn't go too deep into her high MDB, but I do want to watch her other movies. But yeah, the quotable moments in this movie is insane. Yeah.

My favorite moments are the Gina and Deb sparring. But I will save one for the end. But for now, I would like to play the first one, which is, so she's mean to Liv Tyler's character. which is so she's mean to Liv Tyler's character. She's come out with her head buzzed and showed off her, you know, wrist and everything. But Renee Zellweger and her have a little moment. Well, Sinead O'Rebellion. Shock me, shock me, shock me with that deviant behavior.

That is so clever. I swear to God, you get smarter the shorter your skirt gets. And you get smarter the shorter your hair gets. So it's probably a good thing you went with that. Yeah. It's a wonderful look for you, darling. But it's like... I want them to kiss so bad. I know. But there's something kind of affectionate. It is. It is.

It's an interesting, sweet, fun relationship. Yeah. Is that shock me, shock me thing, is that like a reference to something? She says it like it's a movie quote or something. I don't know. It doesn't seem like a quote to anything, but I just loved it. I don't know. I love them together.

Shock me, I think, is a Kiss song. Oh, okay. I Googled it. Maybe that was, yeah. Thanks, Matt. Thanks for Googling. Okay. Yeah, so Deb's having a hard time, and then Joe comes over,

and she says something kind of along the lines of like, oh, I bet you're going to try and save me too. And he just says, you're doing a good job. Best moment in the movie. Beautiful moment. It's my favorite. Like, that's, I was going to say, this is the Joe moment.

It is. It's fantastic. Made me fully fall in love with him. There's a great song playing in the background it is the ballad of el gordo which is a big star song that uh evan dando from the lemonheads is covering here i think it's a beautiful cover of a great song um i really like it um yeah big star you know terrific band i would i would guess you're you're i wouldn't be surprised if the steel drivers your dad's band have a big star cover. Do you know if they do?

I don't, but there is a bit of a connection to Dire Strikes and Mark Knopfler. Oh, yeah? So some of the people from the Steel Drivers have played with Mark Knopfler before. Cool. And so Romeo and Juliet, which is on the soundtrack, is— Oh! I love that song. Yeah, this is a great moment.

And I think that when I'm watching this movie, I'm desperately wanting it to be about something. Because it does seem so trailery and it is so cut up. And I think these moments with Joe telling people that they belong and people feeling like they belong, they're the best things in the movie um and yeah this is a this is a great little scene well acted by both of them with a fucking great needle drop i love it it is my favorite thing about before he he so he finds deb in one of those listening closets yeah which the set can i talk about just the production design sure yeah the set of this movie moves so nicely? I've always thought that, like, I love that this movie takes place in one place. One of my favorite pilots, which is not free with ads, is News Radio.

Oh, yeah, News Radio. I love that set. You have an upstairs, like, you know, booth that you can see through with the glass. You have the office. You have all this stuff. And you can just move throughout one set, which this movie has that. And I don't know. There's so many little pockets of fun places you can go.

There's a copy room where people fuck. There's the back room where AJ has a little desk with art supplies. Yeah. And it makes it makes so much sense that like when you watch this as a kid, like it was just your fantasy workplace. Like this is what work is probably going to be like. Yeah. I think I was excited to work as a kid. I think I was like I think I like maybe like asked places for job applications too early. I think like at 12 I probably went up like you my application, because I think I was excited to work.

And I think stuff like this got me excited to do it. It made me super excited. And, oh, God. And I also just wanted to look like these people. Oh, yeah, sure. They were so stylish and gorgeous. But I remember when Joe goes to find Deb, she's in one of those booths.

There were listening booths. Oh, yeah, I love those. Which this is based on Tower Records. There was a Tower Records in Nashville. It didn't look anything like this. Yeah. And I was so sad. But when it closed you know. Yeah. R.I.P. Tower Records. Yeah.

I know. Tower Records were fun. None of it was as cool as this. But yeah. So those listening booths there were clearly people fucking in one of the listening booths. Yeah. But I love that Joe passed by the one where people were fucking and all he did was tap and go and wag a finger. Yeah. He didn't scold anyone.

Sex positive Joe. He just kind of went. We stan a sex positive kid. He just went, all right, you two. Get out of here. He was just such a, I don't know, understanding good guy. He does mention that he was married and that his first wife left him for a woman yeah and his second wife left him at gunpoint right yeah they

kind of glossed over that part they sure did what was like yeah i'd be a little too dark guys that might be maybe this is yeah a weird detail that the audience will constantly be thinking about. I'm just not going to ask about it. Why did she have a gun, Joe? Joe. Yeah, exactly. So it seems like Joe has a whole backstory, but he does have a little bit of a love interest moment. Yeah.

So let's talk about Rex Manning and Rex Manning's assistant. Yes. So Rex Manning is hanging out in their little, what do you call it? Their little break room. That is huge. That is like bigger than my house. It's bigger than the fucking store. Yeah, I know, right?

It is two buildings. One's the store and one's the break room. These buildings are the same size. There's also multiple moments in the movie where you're like, who is working in the store? The whole cast is back here. I know. There's nobody multiple moments in the movie where you're like, who is working in the store? The whole cast is back here. I know. There's nobody outside. Right.

You have 12 people working today and they are all back here making fun of Rex Manning. Yes. So, yeah. So, Rex Manning has his assistant. Emily, what's the actress's name here? I don't know if it's Debbie Mazar or Mazar. Oh, yes, right. But she's amazing.

She's so beautiful. And she's in tons of movies. She's kind of like Gina Gershon, where she's like... Oh, yeah. She was a real 90s indie movie Miramax staple. Yeah. So, and God bless Debbie. That wig.

Yeah. I hope it wasn't her hair. I mean, you know, if it was your choice to do that hair, I think that's great. But I just don't think it was. Yeah. It is this orange, how do I put this? It's like an orange Jonathan Taylor Thomas cut. Okay.

Yes, the middle kid from Home Improvement, sure. And boy, does she... It was the hot haircut. And she's got a different hat on it every time. Yeah. And on this show, we do a worst hat, but we also sometimes make the hat a wig. Yes. What is a wig? This is the first time...

But a false hair hat. ...that it's a worst hat on a hat. Wow. Here we go. The worst hat. I think you need to play it twice because the wig is a hat. Yep. Okay.

The worst hat. There it is. And she also has another hat, so do it again. The worst hat. Thank you so much. So, yeah, so this is something interesting about this character is that she quits and then inexplicably is back in the store after she quits with a different hat. And I think that's the editing. I think maybe she comes back on day two.

But, yeah, it's so weird. Can I tell you something fun? Yes. In the Free With Ads YouTube version that is clearly a director's cut mishmash bullshit, There is a scene that makes it a little bit more. Okay. She has a moment where, you know, the crew that's back there making fun of her for, like, working with Rex Manning.

She goes into Joe's office and, like, you know, lets loose and talks about how she used to be cool, used to be fun. I hate his fucking music. I hate this guy. And they're having a moment where he's really like, cool, used to be fun. I hate his fucking music. I hate this guy. And they're having a moment where he's really like, oh, this chick is cool and hot. And then she goes, you know what?

I'm going to quit. And he's like, no, what the fuck? No, please don't quit. And then she leaves. But in the theatrical cut that we watch, she just goes, I quit and leaves. Right. And he's like, where the fuck?

And then she comes back and is into him. The director's cut one that leaves a bunch of weird sloppy shit in there. Yeah. They should have left that scene in. Oh, yeah. Because it's nice. Also, we always want more of her. It does seem like she's just like teleporting in and out of the store and changing outfits and coming back.

It is very weird. But yeah, so let's talk about when Liv Tyler finally gets a crack at Rex Manning. Okay. So she demands to bring Rex his lunch. She has this plan in her head. Best fucking scene. She loses it and it's so funny. Yeah, that is a good scene when she demands that she's going to bring him lunch

because she has this plan to sleep with him. Yeah. So yeah, they've set up a little banquet for him in one of the store's many back rooms. The back room has a back room. I know. There's the break room and then there's just this other room. It's clearly like a fucking mop closet. Yeah.

They put him in there. It's so gross. So she takes off her clothes. She's wearing white underwear and a red bra. I know. I love that. I love that they're not matching. So here's what I heard.

I read in this oral history thing that I read on BuzzFeed. I guess there's a missing scene where Renee Zellweger gives her the red bra. It's in the Free With Abs cut on YouTube. So yeah, that explains her kind of mismatched underwear. Also, it specifies that she's 17. Yeah, maybe good that they cut that out. Maybe good. Some cuts are good.

They are good because in the main one, he goes, how old are you? And she goes, old enough. Sure. So they don't specify how old she is. Let's talk about another key difference in this scene. In the theatrical cut, she takes off her clothes and he unzips his pants and says, rock and roll.

And then she leaves. So this is how it goes down in the director's cut. And please just know that there is a bottle of Hidden Valley salad dressing on the table. Yeah, he's eating salad. Not as sweet as you think. How old are you? Old enough.

Sure you want to do this? Yeah, definitely. I hope you like the taste of blue cheese. Oh, my God. So he implies that he is going to cover his dick in Hidden Valley blue cheese salad dressing. It is so much grosser. Well, much weirder. Can I give you my take on that? Please.

Because in the theatrical cut, he just unzips his pants and goes rock and roll. And then she's like, fuck this and leaves, which amazing. Like, but in both, it is implied that he does not want to fuck her. OK. And that he's driving her away. Yes. Okay. And I think it's in the Free With Ads version, in the proper YouTube Free With Ads, which I don't know why they have this weird director's cut in the proper Free With Ads on YouTube.

But his character is painted so differently. There's a couple differences, which we'll get to. it so differently. There's a couple differences, which we'll get to. But this one, it's just like, he does not,

he's not interested in, honestly, I think he just wants to eat his fucking lunch. Oh, interesting. Like, he doesn't, but it's gross. Yes. Like, he's humiliating her,

but it's like, he's clearly an asshole, but he doesn't want her to suck blue cheese off his dick. That's not what he, he's like, get the fuck out of here.

Yeah. Because as soon as, I hear it is really good for your dick, though, he's like, get the fuck out of here. Cause as soon as, I hear it is really good for your dick though. It's like good for the dick skin. People ask me how I get my penis so smooth. Because, okay.

So when he says that and she's like, fuck that. And then like grabs her clothes and leaves. As soon as she leaves, then he says rock and roll. Oh, interesting. Okay.

So he does the rocket roll like afterwards. But to me, it's just like, cause we know that later on he sleeps with Gina. That's true. And he has no qualms about doing that. I think it's just clear that he goes, this girl is inexperienced and absolutely not. So, yeah. So then Gina seduces him by guessing what color of underwear he's wearing.

She seduces him by guessing what color of underwear he's wearing. But before that, though, Liv Tyler has a whole lash out thing where she just lashes out at Gina, who I guess is her sluttier friend, but honestly loves her very much. Yeah. And just wanted her to have a good time when she lost her. She loans her the bra. Listen, Liv Tyler has a lot of misplaced rage and maybe she's on speed this whole time. So maybe that explains some of the erratic behavior. So she goes up to the roof to cry. AJ comes up and this is when he tries to confess his love for her.

I will say he is kind of a dick to her in this. She's clearly had a really weird traumatic experience and he's like, oh, I'm friend zoned. clearly had a really like weird traumatic experience and he's like oh i'm friend zoned um but he i think it was justified pretty well because he has been planning and stressing about this the whole time and he's clearly not the brightest bulb no no in the bunch and he's asked joe about like how like how do i tell her and he goes just say just say, I love you. And it's like, no, Joe, you should tell him, Hey, can we go get a coffee or can we go like get food and then have this conversation? Not like,

let's just bulldoze this bitch on a rooftop. Like, I know. Yeah. Like what the fuck, dude? Um, yes. And he,

yeah. And there is that, that like weird rom-com male lead thing where it's just, you're supposed to just dump your feelings all over everybody. It's a little weird. It's not the best handled relationship in the movie. No, he does not come across as a good guy. So, yeah. Liv Tyler and

Renee Zellweger have a giant fight in the store. Mark... Well, because she fucks Rex Manning. Right, yes. Everybody's mad at that. Can I please... So she seduces Rex Manning by sitting next to him and saying that she can predict anyone's underwear. Right. And she predicts that, she's like, I've always been able to do it. I bet yours are jockeys, navy blue.

They were not navy blue. Oh, interesting. I thought I saw a little bit of Undie peeking out. We don't see like a full shot of the Undie. We do. We do. Oh, do we? Okay. He goes in the copy room and he goes, the $64,000 question. Or $65,000. I don't know numbers. And she like, you know,

lifts up, pulls his pants down, lifts it up. And they are like, blue, blue. That is not navy blue. This is a nitpick. No, no, no. Please. I'm just saying I wouldn't fuck her. She couldn't get the fucking color right. Thank you. I don't care how good you look in the apron. Yeah, fair's fair.

Fair's fair. So we get this weird little shot of Mark. He is eating brownies that I guess are pot brownies. Yeah. He's just scarfing them in that like funny movie eating way that is like so intense. Also, you don't get high immediately off pot brownies. I know. And just as like someone who has had more edible freakouts than I care to admit to.

Oh, I have a retail edible freakout. Oh my gosh. Yeah. Did you envision you were at a GWAR concert and they fed you to a worm? No, it's way worse. Okay. So the last men's retail store I worked in in New York City, Madison Avenue. Fancy fucking place.

Like made to measure suiting. I had this edible Tootsie Roll that I got from the knitting factory at a comedy show. Oh, the knitting factory. I know. And we had this upstairs room that had a TV. And so at lunch, we had an hour lunch, luxurious. And I took a half of it. And I'm up there eating. And sometimes when you eat after taking an edible, that makes it like really launch pad up.

Twilight was on. Oh, wow. OK. The TV. And I was like, I hate it. I was like, fuck Twilight. Blah, blah, blah. Never watched it.

I got so invested in Twilight. And then I realized, oh, no. Oh, no. I like Twilight too much. I'm probably too high. I was so high. I need to go to a hospital. I'm enjoying Twilight.

No, but I was so high and it's like I didn't realize it until I was like completely enthralled with Twilight and then like the hour was, it was like I was up there for an hour and a half and they were like, Emily, what the fuck are you doing up here? And I was like, huh? I had to like rush downstairs and I was up there for an hour and a half and they were like, Emily, what the fuck are you doing up here? And I was like, huh?

I had to like rush downstairs and I was geeked out. She has to choose between a vampire and a werewolf! How will she choose? I was like, would you like to match your tie with your Laura Piana pants? Yeah, it was bad. So yes, Mark is eating

pot brownies in the craziest funny movie eating way and he envisions that he has been pulled up on stage at a guar concert and they feed him guar of course are the like monster metal band that all dress up like monsters uh it's weird they're not playing a guar song it's like some like country song it's the weirdest yeah it's weird i don't know it's like you could i bet you could afford a GWAR song movie. How much does GWAR charge to put a song in there? What the fuck was that?

Yeah. Yeah. It's like, this sounds like GWAR. This third eye blind kind of sounds like GWAR. It's so weird. Mark, you should join the band. So crazy. I would love to go.

I still haven't been to a GWAR concert. I would love to go. Me neither. We should go. I know. GWAR, if you're out there, come to LA. We would love to see you. Yeah.'t been to a GWAR concert. Me neither. We should go. I know. GWAR, if you're out there, come to LA. We would love to see you. We'd love to see you live.

Do the podcast. Oh, yeah. GWAR, come on free with ads. Everybody, at Odorous Ungerous, tell him to come on free with ads. Hell yeah. Talk about failure to launch with us. Oh, God. That is on there.

I've seen it. Yeah. We'll do a McConaughey month. Yeah. So everybody decides to have a funeral for Deb so she can realize how important she is to the family. Yeah. This is a really nice scene. It's a really good scene.

And again, it has Joe kind of like bringing everybody together, telling them they have a family. We kind of learn a lot. There's a lot of like backstory dumping in this scene. This is where Renee Zellweger says, it's always been my dream to sing in a band and I can't even audition. I'm like, what? You haven't mentioned that this whole movie? Also, who's auditioning for bands?

Yeah, I know, right? It's a Marx band. Yeah, there's a little bit of everyone just kind of tells you what their goal is in this scene. Oh yeah, AJ wants to go to art school. AJ wants to go to art school. We haven't really heard about that until now. But yeah, it is weird in the editing of the movie, but it is a really nice scene with really nice acting

and I think you do fantasize about that when you're a mopey kid of like, what if I just had a funeral and then everybody would have to say how great I am. Oh yeah, it is definitely a fantasy kind of fulfillment. Yeah. It is like, right.

There's the Huck Finn thing of seeing your own funeral. So, yeah, I think kids, when they're feeling like. Oh, good reference. Huck Finn. Yeah. Yeah, and I think when kids are feeling like nobody cares about me. That's why you run away from home. Yeah, exactly.

To see if your parents care. And then they never realize you left. And then they'll think I'm dead and I come back and see the funeral. And they're all crying. And everyone's crying. So, yeah. And the thing is, it gets busted up, the funeral, which everybody makes up. Everybody who was fighting makes up.

Oh, yeah. Rex Manning. There is a clip I want to play. Rex Manning, after he gets caught banging Gina in the copy room, comes out. Everybody is pissed. Yeah. And AJ decides to jump Rex Manning. Yeah, they just start.

The little moments of violence in this movie are really weird. They kind of don't seem to fit. When Joe beats up Lucas and this, when AJ jumps Rex Manning, it's like, these should be bigger deals. But also, in both cuts, Rex Manning sucker punches AJ. And it's a good fake punch, I gotta say. But there are two different cuts after he punches him. Joe is like, get the fuck out of my store. And in the main one, Rex Manning goes, why don't you all just fade away?

Yeah, good line. But in the free with ads version, there's a new one. There's a different one. And I'd love for you to play it, Matt. You're just a washed up imposter, man. Imposter. You know something? You could all be right

Okay Isn't that Oh interesting So they kind of make him More sympathetic in this Yeah I mean it's like He's having a hard

Fucking time Yeah And he's like You know what? You could all be right Aren't we all? We're all the same But it does make it

Under the giant roof of Empire Records. But also it doesn't make it as satisfying. I know. He is more fun as a pure villain, I think. Also, I always thought that shirt he was wearing, the shiny purple shirt, was just a shiny purple shirt. There is fringe on that thing. There's fringe on it. There's cowboy fringe.

Yeah, I know. I think we probably mostly watched this movie as kids on a combo TV VCR. Yeah. So it's interesting to see the movie in HD. What the fuck is that fringe for? Yeah, tons of fringe. So the funeral is interrupted when Warren robs the store. We haven't talked about Warren.

He's a kid who was shoplifting. Yes. And now he's back. The shoplifting scene was so fun. The shoplifting scene is a fucking blast. So he's already shoplifted at the store. Also, he gave a fake name, Warren Beatty. Yeah, that's cute.

And they just call him Warren. So it's not his real name. It's not his actual name. Yeah, that's a good gag. So he got busted by the cops. They all take him away. And now he's come back with a gun. Yes.

And it's a big, scary gun. It is a big, scary gun. Well, it only looks big because he's really little. He's a little guy. He's a wee man. Also, fucking amazing performance. The actor is fabulous. His name is Brendan Sexton III.

Oh, the third. The third, yes. He's a friend of mine. He's a personal friend of mine. Oh, really? He's a fantastic actor and he was also in Boys Don't Cry. Oh, my gosh.

Oh, wow. There you go. What a resume. Yeah, still working to this day. Good for him. Good for him. Yeah, so he comes in with this big fucking gun, and AJ's out there, which I thought he was back there for the fucking funeral.

Yeah, I think this is another instance of the editing doesn't really make sense. Yeah, and it was one of- So hard to track people. It's true. It's like, everyone's back there for a funeral. Who's working in the store? Yeah, I think this is another instance of the editing doesn't really make sense. Yeah, and it was one of like- So hard to track people. It's true. It's like everyone's back there for a funeral. Who's working in the store? And then AJ's out there and he walks in, points a gun at AJ and like fires it.

And everyone's like, what the fuck? And so, yeah, there's Warren's there with a gun. It's full of blanks. Yes. But Deb has this iconic martyrdom moment where like Joe comes out and he's like, what are you doing? Get away. And he fires the gun. It's pretty clear that it's blanks at this moment. And he's like, I'm going to, you know, I'm going to fucking kill you or something.

And then Deb, he goes, why don't you talk to my gun or something and then deb pops out and puts her face in front of the gun and she's like hey man i had a talk with god and she says yo what's up and she says get rid of the gun yeah yeah you know she's ready to she's ready to die for her new family she's found she's she's found something to live for and then they hire him yeah i know and then there's like, I just wanted a job. And then, you know, the theme of these lost people all come together at Empire Records. So the news shows up because of the Warren Gunn thing.

Mark runs on camera and says that they're having a big party tonight with live music. And then immediately the whole town shows up. I love in these movies how much just saying something on the local news causes a movement. And, you know, again, it's the 90s. There's no streaming. So more people probably are just watching local news. But I like that that's all it took to get the whole town out for a party.

And I also loved in the back where they were just like, I don't have a permit or whatever for the beer. And Joe goes, screw the permit. And it's like, fuck yeah. Yeah, so they're having a big party. They're selling Debs buttons. There is a moment where you see the people on the street and there's these three women who are also wearing. The little old ladies. Oh, I'm talking about there.

So there's three babes who are all wearing the Music Town apron with nothing underneath. And I'm like, oh, cool. But also, how do they know that? Were they watching the movie? Like, how do they know to do that? Well, no, there is a scene where they're doing like a circle with a slash through it on the Music Town aprons. Right.

So those women are wearing those with a slash. But how do they know to be naked underneath it? Oh, yeah, that's a good point. prints. Right. So those women are wearing those with the slash. But how do they know to be naked underneath it? Oh. Yeah, that's a good point. But yes, and there's little old ladies that are drinking beer. It's very cute. But the little old ladies are wearing curlers in their hair. They just came from the beauty parlor.

Or they got out of bed and they're wearing little house coats. Because they saw on the news that there's going to be a party. But it was cute because there's like these little old ladies. They're wearing the curlers in their house coats with their glasses on. And it looks like they're all sharing one beer. Yeah. And they're all like, oh, beer.

I know. It's so cute. I've never had one of these. Yes, it's truly that. I read about these in a book. And, you know, an iconic moment. They play the hit song Sugar High

on the roof that is a coyote shivers song his character is playing it there is a bass player we haven't seen we hear drums on the track

no drummer up there there isn't? no it's just a guitar player and a bass player oh my god yeah kind of janky

and then they give they give Renee Zellweger a solo. It's great. She sings great. The dancing she is doing is like the most amazing dancing. She's like flapping her arms like little bird wings. It's so cute. It is just like clearly impromptu, and it does communicate like, this person is getting their dream.

It is. She's so good. They're finally getting their dream that we learned about four minutes ago. When she said, I want to be in a band! Well, it's also just like, you knew a star was born. I mean, the whole movie was just like, this chick is it. Yeah, for sure. But my favorite thing is that skirt. My mother would say, I hope she's wearing a hairnet with that thing.

It is so short. It's the shortest skirt I've ever seen. I don't know how it's not showing everything. Somehow she has one of those bodies that you have like a short skirt and nothing hangs out underneath. Nothing. I don't know how.

I don't know how. I don't know how. Yeah. They spent $10 million in CGI to get rid of Renee Zellweger's pussy. If Renee Zellweger is listening, please tell me how your chooch didn't fall out from underneath that skirt. Renee Zellweger, how long is your labia? Tell us. It's because she is sex. She is sex.

Yes. You are sex. You are sex. You are sex. While all this is going on, the yuppie owner of the store tells Joe he can buy it. It's a little weird. Joe's like, I'm going to open my own

store. They cut, and then the guy is still there, and he's like, I'll sell you the store. Anyway, I think the yuppie owner of the store is the tallest person in the movie. What? Tallest guy. Really? I think he's pretty tall.

I think Eddie's the tallest guy in the movie. He might be the tallest guy. But he has bad posture. Yeah. So you wouldn't know. A lot of slouching in this movie. It was the 90s. Everybody was a slacker.

They slouched. Nothing to live for. Also, who cares? Matt, this is an important segment. Matt, we have to take time out to do it, so why not do it right? This is a fan favorite segment. Also, who cares

though? Yeah, you're right. But here's the thing. Spoken by a true tall guy. He never has to think of it. He's tall. You're always the tallest guy in all the movies. I forgot I had tall privilege. That's my bad. In all the movies you're in, you're the tall guy. That's true. He never has to think of it. He's tall. You're always the tallest guy in all the movies. I forgot I had tall privilege. That's my bad. In all the movies you're in, you're the tallest guy. It's true.

So Joe now owns the record store for some reason. Everybody goes up on the roof to dance. And it is very clear that in some of the scenes, everybody knows what the song is because they're singing along. In other scenes, they're just like, we're going to drop in a song later and everybody is dancing to their own song.

This is one of them. Everybody's dancing is totally different in off time. I kind of love it. I do too. What is the actual needle drop in this? I can't remember. The The. Okay.

I think it's the band and I think This Is The Day is the name of the song I love this song so much My favorite song in the movie I mentioned is that Big Star cover Do you have a favorite song in this movie? I think this song is up there

Oh god, it's hard It's hard When I was younger this is a song that isn't on the soundtrack but it's that Cranberry song. Oh, yeah. That when she goes up to the roof, I can't remember the name of it, but it's not on the soundtrack. Oh, interesting.

And it's very good. But I think the one that's at the very end, I think that's probably it. But yeah, they all dance the night away as the credits roll, and that is Empire Records. So good. We're going to rank the movie on, and that is Empire Records. So good. We're going to rank the movie on a scale of 1 to 10 super loud commercials, but first we're going to talk about what we think are the best lines in the movie. Yeah! Almost too many to count.

Here is mine. This is the one I loved as a kid. I laughed so hard the first time I heard this, and this was just kind of in my movie quote repertoire all throughout high school. this and this was just kind of in my movie quote repertoire all throughout high school um there's a moment when warren is in the back room and someone has glued a bunch of quarters to the ground aj who glued these quarters down i did what the hell for man i don't feel that i need to explain my art to you warren i feel like i need to explain my art to you, Warren. Such a good line. It's pretty good.

And that's what I say every time someone asks me why we talk about cum so much on this show. Or why we talk about the tallest guy in the movie. Yes. It is our art. Who cares? I don't feel like I have to explain my art to you, Warren. Emily, do you have a best line in the movie? I mean, there are so many.

I think Lucas has some of the best there's one where AJ goes like what's with you today man he goes what's with today today

what's with today today that's one of my faves but again Deb and Gina my favorite fucking sparring duo

in the movie I'm gonna give you another moment and this is when they have to go through the handbook for Music Town together. No visible tattoos. No revealing clothing.

We're both screwed. At least you're used to it. No, Debra, don't be bitter. Certainly with your ever-growing collection of flesh-mutilating silver appendages and your brand new neo-Nazi boot camp makeover, the boys will come a-runnin'. Let's not fight. Let's just rip.

They rip up the Music Town handbook. I love them. I hate Music Town so much! Dan the Man, save the empire! All right, now that we've talked... Hold on, I have a favorite. Oh, Matt, your favorite line. This is fun. All right. Now that we've talked. Hold on. I have a favorite. Oh, Matt, your favorite line.

This is fun. What do you got, buddy? Who cares? How do you like your own medicine? I don't like it. Take that, tallest guy in the fucking podcast. Tallest guy in the booth. My favorite part was the fight between Liv Tyler.

Play a little clip. Okay, here it is. I'm so excited! I'm so excited! I'm so scared! That's a great part. Well, those are the best lines. We are going to rank the movie when we come back. We're back. It's Free With Ads. We're back.

It's Free With Ads. We're about to rank Empire Records. Emily's favorite movie? Second favorite movie? Your first favorite? Where does it fall? So Princess Bride has been my favorite movie for most of my life. And this has been number two.

Okay. But after watching this over and over, I don't know. I could watch this all day, every day. Hear that, Princess Bride? You're a piece of shit now. Hang on. The Emily said you said no. Well, listen, I need to watch Princess Bride again, but this one might be my new favorite. I don't know.

Well, I'll do my ranking and I'll let you have the last word on this. Okay. Well, I'll do my ranking and I'll let you have the last word on this. Okay. Yeah. Again, this is a movie I had seen a lot of, mostly in chunks, I guess, as a kid. Yeah, really took me back to the 90s. Love this soundtrack.

Love these vibes. Love these performances. I was shocked sitting down and watching it as a movie. What a weird mess that it is. And, you know, and I do think you are onto something, Emily, in that, like, it is kind of just like a day in the life and life is messy. And I think that's a good explanation for why it's like that, you know. Right. But I did want, like, a little more structure. I wanted things to make sense a little bit more. I wanted there to be some plotting and big picture stuff to go along with that great

dialogue that is so pristine. Yeah, it seems like it's a great script that's like, I don't know, it wants a better edit or something like that. But I did have an absolute blast watching it. I think if you vaguely remember this movie from your childhood, absolutely put it on again. Put on the soundtrack again. A lot of great songs. Oh, that thrift store fashion. We

talked a little bit about it. But yeah, love everybody's thrifted clothes. Yeah, so I had a lot of fun watching this. I'm going to give it a 7. I'm going to give it a 7 commercials out of 10 commercials. Okay. The mishmash of it all, I love.

I just really enjoy the performances and just the quirks of every character. You like everybody so much. I want more from every single character. Yeah. So I also think that because of the intro that we saw with the lady who was cut from theatrical version right in the opening with lucas i think he's supposed to be this kind i'm i'm uh driven by a force much greater than luck yeah i think he's supposed to be this person that catapults like this action fix like puts everybody's character where they should be. Oh, interesting. Had he not lost all of the money in Atlantic City,

nobody would have moved their lives forward and they wouldn't have connected the way that they did that day. I like that. So, I mean, that's what I think the mission was with the plot. Okay. I give it... I know that a 10 out of 10 is a tippy Hedren 10. I'm giving it an 11.

Wow. Which is a- The floating 11. It's a tippy toppy. Okay. Hedren. Very good. Thank you.

We have our first 11. Tippy toppy. On the Hedrens. All right. Well, that is Empire Records. Happy Rex Manning Day, everyone. Happy Rex Manning Day, everyone. Happy Rex Manning Day. Let's talk about a couple of plugs before we go.

Okay, okay. Emily, what do you got? Okay. So, you know, Meals of History, watch that. But my good friend and former retail best bud, Caitlin Riley, who is King margo on instagram and tiktok amazing artist she does these tiny little paintings on matchbooks that are insane she's like pumps them out like crazy she's one of the most talented people i know yeah i've seen these things they're gorgeous she's yeah

so she and i have collaborated she's done some of me. And we've done an event at Melrose Flea. And there was a limited edition one that came out. But now we do have a forever edition. So if you check out her Instagram and TikTok, you can probably find access or reach out to me. And I'm probably going to put them up on my Etsy store. Very proud of her. Proud of our friendship. We've known each other for over 10 years. We worked at

Jack Spade together. There you go. She is my Empire Records, pretty much, friendship, you know. I'm definitely the Gina. She's the Corey. Cool. Which one am I? Oh, that's interesting. Which Empire Records character am I? You the Gina. She's the Corey. Cool. Which one am I? Oh, that's interesting. Which Empire Records character am I?

You're Mark. Which one's he again? The one you hate. Well, you know what? Maybe that's why I had such a strong reaction to Mark. Maybe I was seeing myself. You're Big Daddy Joe. Oh, stop.

That's Mark. I can't play the drums. That's a Mark right over there. I can't play the drums. You're Booze. I'm the blue cheese. I'm a dick covered in blue cheese dressing. I'm't play the drums. That's a Mark right over there. I can't play the drums. You're booze. I'm the blue cheese. I'm a dick covered in blue cheese dressing. I'm a cheese dick.

Yeah. Dip your buffalo wings into my dick. You got some celery sticks? You got some carrots? I make them taste better. Matt, you are really being an antagonist tonight, and I don't like it. I think I just am tired. Oh, he's tired.

He's tired of listening to us have fun. Let's argue about who's tall some more. Hey, I got an event coming up if you're in the L.A. area, but if you're not in the L.A. area, there's something for you here, too, on April 14th. That's my birthday.

Oh, my gosh. Well, from 12 to 2, I will be signing comics at Golden Apple Comics in Hollywood. Got a great lineup for this signing. It ain't just me. It is Ryan Katie, Amy Chase, Casey Gilley, and Elliot Kalin, who MaxFun fans

might know as one of the hosts of The Flophouse. He is signing his new Hercules comic. Amy and Casey are signing their D&D comic. There's also going to be some My Little Pony comics on display. And we're going to sign our new spooky Archie comic

Pop's Chocolate Shop of Horrors Fresh Meat. So yeah, you can come out to that on Emily's birthday from 12 to 2 at Golden Apple. And if you're not in the LA area, Golden Apple sells all of these things on their website. You can get them through the mail. We're going to throw a link into the show description

if you want some signed comics. Or you can head over to goldenapplecomics.com. They're a great shop. A great indie shop. They've been there forever and we love them. Great. And finally, as we go, I just want to say one more time. What? I hate fucking MusicTown.

MusicTown, if you're listening, we hate you! Dan the Man! We hate you! Save the Empire! Alright, unless you're listening, we hate you! Damn the man! We hate you! Save the empire! All right, unless you're Music Town, we want you to join us next week when our movie will be Skeleton Key. Maximum Fun. A worker-owned network. Of artist-owned shows. Supported. Thank you.