Ghostrunners - 138 - Best Ghostrunners Moments of 2021
Episode Date: December 27, 2021Our favorite moments from the podcast this year all in one place... Enjoy! Thanks so much to everyone who listened and supported and made this such a fun year to talk to your friend in a basement. Gho...strunners merch: https://bit.ly/399MXFu Become a Patron and get exclusive content from Jake & Brad: https://bit.ly/2XJ1h3y Watch this episode on YouTube: https://bit.ly/3cQSPnw Follow us on Instagram: http://bit.ly/33WAq4P Leave us a voice memo and ask a question: https://anchor.fm/jake-triplett/message Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Transcript
Discussion (0)
Ghost Riders podcast back at you again, episode one, three, eight.
And if you have never seen this on YouTube before, you might look at me right now and
realize, oh, he's a pretty big dude, pretty large guy, pretty hefty boy above average.
And, you know, there's been people who will comment on our jean shorts videos,
some really nice things.
Some people have a little bit of constructive criticism for me.
And I'm just here to kind of kind of help clear the air a little bit of constructive criticism for me. Um, and I'm just
here to kind of, kind of, uh, help clear the air a little bit, Jake. Yeah. Some like parameters.
Yeah. So I, so here's, here's the big thing is I'm okay being called big, big daddy. Great. I
don't want to be called fat, a big daddy. It sounds like a guy you want to go hang out with,
you know, go get some milkshakes with big daddy. Yeah. Fat daddy sounds like a discount firework you find on the side of the road, you know,
rural Missouri.
Hey, you want to give one of the fat daddies?
Deal on fat daddies.
Come on, we got three for five here.
And so I just, just let you know, big is good.
Fat.
No, thank you.
All right.
Are there other, well, let me ask you some other like words.
Maybe they're like, could be iffy.
Like, Oh, maybe this is good. Maybe this is not like, okay. All right. Are there other? Well, let me ask you some other like words. Maybe they like could be iffy. Like, oh, maybe this is good.
Maybe this is not like.
OK.
Tubbo.
Is that something?
No, I don't want.
No, I don't want to.
It's not fall in the category of acceptable.
No.
OK.
What about something like one of Shrek's cousins?
No, I don't like that one.
No, that one doesn't.
OK.
What about.
Or any ogre theme? Don't about any ogre theme don't do any
ogre theme thing no ogre theme no okay okay what about like the target demographic for every weight
loss commercial no just because i went too long not because it hurts my feelings just wordy yeah
it just doesn't go up it doesn't flow flow off the tongue. You're like Big Daddy. Okay. Okay. Okay. Um, okay. This one's shorter.
Yeah.
Jabba the Hutt.
No.
No?
Okay.
Okay.
What about, um, like rejected cast member of my 600 pound life?
Uh, uh, oh, ooh, I, ooh, I think this tight beat means that it's going down with some
random thoughts and a white meat too
Midwest best friends eating fast food on repeat
So come along, let's have some fun and go ahead, get on your feet
Cause this is the Ghost Runners Podcast
Every Monday morning we're taking round
Ghost Runners Podcast
Ghost Runners Podcast
What is up, Ghostrunners listeners?
This is a very special episode and we're very excited about it.
If you're wondering why the audio quality right now sounds so interesting,
that's because I'm inside of a deep, deep cave in South Africa mining for diamonds.
So that is why it sounds weird. But enjoy our year in review best moments of the Ghost Runners podcast in 2021.
Enjoy them, whether you've heard them before or whether you're brand new.
Some of these may need a little context, but hey, who doesn't love a little podcast hide
and seek?
Go get them.
Have fun.
Thank you guys so much for listening to our podcast.
Brad and I appreciate
it big time. Uh, Brad couldn't come to the phone today because he just found a, uh, a big D as we
call it in the, uh, in the diamond mining industry. So he's polishing that off right now, but we love
you guys. Thank you for listening. Have a great week. Bye-bye. Uh, however, I need some advice. I am graduating from Emory University in about a month and a half,
and I feel like the constant question I've been asked is, oh, what are you going to do after you
graduate? And I hate that question because while it's totally natural for people to ask, I really
have no clue what I'm actually going to do. Anyways, I was wondering if you guys could give
me some outrageous, wild things to tell people, like I'm going to pursue cheesemaking or just something that would really throw people off.
Anyway, thanks for all you do, guys.
Bye bye.
OK, I'm going to start a sentence and you're going to end it.
OK, I like this a lot.
OK, so actually real quick before we start.
She mentioned March Madness thing.
I was going to tell everyone the March Madness story publicly this episode.
I think it's been such a story heavy episode.
I've already told so many stories.
Like I'll do it next time.
Okay.
Whatever.
Sounds good.
But it's on my mind because I told you guys I'd tell you in like a month or two.
Okay.
So what's her name?
Her name is Kaylee, but spelled weird.
Okay.
So hey, Kaylee, what are you doing after college?
Oh, I'm going to go to Egypt and perfect the art of?
Squares.
A lot of people think triangles, but no, we're going to focus on building the perfect square.
Hey, Kaylee, what are you doing after college? Oh yeah. Actually I got an internship
with Kodak. It's not what you think though. I'm going to be trying my hand at bear massages.
We're going to look at Kodak bears and see if we can recreate what a tree does for them. Yep.
Hey Kaylee, good to see you. You too. Uh,
what are you up to after college?
You know,
um,
I tried to play bassoon,
um,
at one point in my life and,
uh,
kind of struggled with that.
Um,
but thanks to my uncle and,
uh,
$15,000,
I'm actually going to see how hard dentistry can actually be.
Yep.
Hi,
Kaylee.
Come on. Stop. see how hard dentistry can actually be yep hi kaylee oh hello senor ramos um actually i uh my grandma as you know just passed away and she was a hoarder. And so I am going to take
the 15,000 pounds of yarn that she had. And I'm going to try to trap bees. Hey, Kaylee,
how's it going? Um, Whoa, big straw in your cup. You're telling me, what are you doing for, what are you doing post-college life?
Well, it actually has to do with a lot with the straws.
I'm actually going to be starting a documentary that's centered around straws.
And that's what I would tell her.
All those things.
All right.
My turn.
Oh, we got to reverse the roles. Oh, I'm not good at All those things. All right, my turn. We gotta reverse the roles.
Oh, I'm not good at the second part though.
That was so funny.
You're so good at the part.
Am I?
I feel like I started better than I ended.
Strauss was good.
Hey, Kellen, how's it going?
Actually, it's Kaylee.
Oh, I'm sorry.
I haven't seen you in a while.
Brain burp.
Where am I at today?
I haven't had my coffee.
Oh my gosh, I love coffee. Yes, it's a bummer they't had my coffee. Oh my gosh, I love coffee.
Yes, there's a bummer they closed down the bean.
Oh my gosh, I'm going to miss the bean when I graduate.
Oh, you're graduating soon?
Yes, what are you doing afterwards?
I don't know.
You know what?
Well, funny you mention it.
I actually do.
I've always loved coffee here.
But Brandon, as you know, is moving to Idaho.
So I'm actually going to see if we can extract coffee caffeine from
potatoes and put it in tea and then mix it with chocolate syrup and then make a little bit of
mocha tatoes told you i was better at the other part
hey kaylee cute jeans thanks girl i got them at hey kaylee let me just cut right to the chase Hey, Kaylee. Cute jeans. Thanks, girl.
I got them at...
Hey, Kaylee.
Let me just cut right to the chase.
What are you doing post-graduation?
Thank you.
The jeans are from Zara.
You...
Beep.
Whoa.
Yeah, they're not friends.
Okay.
If you had come to my capstone presentation,
you would know exactly what I'm doing after graduation.
But I don't mind telling you because it's pretty cool.
Ever heard of Taylor Swift?
Ever heard of Kendall Kardashian?
I have.
I am going to be working with the best of the best.
Ever heard of prosthetics?
Yeah.
Me?
Well, I'm going to be using old walrus tusks to put together prosthetic legs for people who only have one leg.
And then they're going to be backup dancers in Taylor Swift's music videos with Kendall Kardashian.
Which, of course, is under the parent company name Tusk It To Me Baby.
Yeah. One more time. Co-owned by Britney Spears. Free Britney.
Yes. It's not toxic anymore.
Anyway, Kaylee, I think that'll help.
So my question is, what is your favorite vacation prank?
And may I use it the next time I'm on vacation?
Thank you guys for the podcast.
Love you both.
Bye-bye.
Do you have specific pranks that are categorized like vacation, first day of school, DMV.
For eight-year-olds.
Playground.
Dentist prank.
Eight to 12, 13 to 16.
When the power's out prank.
When you got Scott toilet paper.
When it's negative 10.
Yeah.
When your mom's at Miss Wilkinson's yoga class prank.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
When you're doing that thing for free.
When you're acting like a New Yorker.
Ventriloquist prank.
Fast food, fast casual food, high-end dining.
Performance couch prank.
When you're at the cell phone store.
Economy parking at the airport prank.
Seedless watermelon prank. Yeah, when you're at the organic farmers prank
Yeah, when you're filming girls in the fall for a prank
Turbo tax online prank
When you're at a salon but you're a guy
But you're getting your hair cut still so it's okay prank
Forgetting to take your laundry
from the washer to the dryer on a thursday prank when you're a groomsman in a wedding that you
don't know but you're you're a good friend to henry caleb whatever his name is can't find q
tips so you just use your car keys prank this couch isn't even a prank anymore
how can he even do this
selling your hamster
to a blind kid prank
forgetting the movie you watched two nights ago
prank oh when you're exchanging your
loonies for your toonies for your dollars
prank going across the border
yeah
when you buy a limo and you go across country with your friends
to try to get on a talk show for somebody that you kind of sometimes watch and you do good things
for people and you go on all 48 states plus canada and mexico and you make a video about it prank
college prank you think maybe you got a zit you it, prank. College prank.
You think maybe you got a zit you could pop,
so you go to pop it, and it turns out it's just blood.
And then you're like, I think I made a neutral situation worse. I should have never done this from the beginning, prank.
When you...
Yeah.
Perfect.
I want to tell you one other quick story, Brad.
So before that, some other things happened to me that Thursday night.
How do I want to tell this story?
There's probably a really fun way to tell it, but I think I'll start at the beginning
and then I'll work towards the end.
Very good place to start.
Okay.
That's what I was thinking.
So a couple of days before that last week, our neighbor, Judy, who we've talked about,
you know, she's not going to Florida.
You're going to Florida, Judy?
No, my grandson's leaving me
and I'm crying. So sweet old Judy.
Wait,
what did you say?
Oh, he's
coming down here, I think. He's like fell on the ground.
Yeah, it's something.
I thought she wasn't going to Florida.
He just yelled through the vent.
Actually, I hope that got picked up.
Yell it really loud again.
Turns out she wasn't going to Florida.
That's great.
Thank you.
Yeah, guys.
Yeah, turns out she wasn't going to Florida.
So Isaac, no, Judy calls Isaac like on Tuesday or something like,
hey, just wanted to
let you know something that's going to be happening Thursday. I don't know if you know, but it's
national prayer day. Oh yeah. It's something that I've done for the last 15 years in this neighborhood
as I, as I gather all the neighbors and they always meet on my driveway and we, we do a little
thing. So when we first get there, we all say the Pledge of Allegiance. And then we all together
sing God Bless America.
And then we all will pray
just for the health
and the safety of each other
in our neighborhood,
in this community.
We're like,
this sounds amazing.
We'll definitely be there.
Like Isaac tells us,
me, Jake Harrison,
count us in.
We're there.
Yeah.
Harrison will lead the charge
on God Bless America.
Oh, yeah.
I would love to see it.
And so she's like,
it's at 7 p.m.
And so we're like, great. We always play basketball at 8 30 yeah right this will be no problem well thursday afternoon rolls around and isaac and i were like shoot do we play at 7 30 yeah ah dang
it and the stadium is like 15 minutes yeah yeah it's something where like we would be leaving
right at seven yeah and so we don't do the best
job planning it's like 6 15 and then i say something isaac goes like one we need dinner
before our game and two we should probably get dinner soon because we should probably leave
like i'm starting to imagine we can't leave while the pledge of allegiance is going on
like i am next to our neighbors with this woman oh oh yeah you can't like yeah i can't be leaving
while it's happening.
Judy's like, you said you were going to be here.
And then Isaac are both punting in the car.
We have to get out of here.
It's like, shoot, shoot.
Yeah, we got to go.
We go to Subway.
I don't know what happens.
There's like a lapse in memory or some sort of black hole.
We get back and it's been 30 minutes.
And Subway is so close to my house.
The girl who orders merch in my neighborhood, you know.
She walks there, yeah.
Yeah, it's so close.
I don't know how it took 30 minutes, but it did.
So it's 6.50 and we haven't even eaten our sandwiches.
We come back to our house like, dude, we got to go right now.
We have to leave right now.
Get your shoes, get your shorts.
She's old enough.
She's already out there.
I know.
I opened the garage door and I'm not even down the stairs yet.
And Isaac is like peering around the edge of it.
And he,
he like jumps back in.
No,
Judy.
You praying over there?
And he's like,
she's out there.
She's already out there.
I'm like,
no.
Call an Uber.
Yeah.
And meet us at our fan's house.
I'm like,
all right,
what if like you go out the back and I,
I don't know how I,
we got out of this.
So now we're strategy. It's just like the funniest funniest dynamic i'm like trying to explain like yeah we're
trying to dip out of prayer night to go to a wreck basketball game because a sweet old lady who we
just yeah you know harassed last week doesn't see us and so we're sitting there isaac's like we got
to just go out just bite the bullet i'm like no no no no no oh i agree yeah i was like we can't
bite it we can't bite it i don't want to see her't bite it. I don't want to see her. It's too cold. I don't want to look her in the eyes.
The bullet is too cold.
Because what's going to happen is we're not, we're just going to end up having a conversation
with her.
And then it's last five minutes.
Now Pledge of Allegiance is starting.
Why don't you guys stick around for the Pledge of Allegiance?
Now, what point do we leave?
God bless America.
That doesn't seem like the right time to do it.
Definitely not going to leave during the prayer.
You can't leave it white with foam.
It's not the right place.
And then what do you know?
I'm like, just check one more time. Isaac peers around. He's like dude i'm nervous to check i'm like just check stick your head out
he sticks his head out he goes she went inside go go go go he sprint to the car and her husband
who's a little more out of it is on the front porch still almost like a uh breaking bad hector
salamanca like he can't really communicate he's
like trying to like like they're leaving for judy they're leaving justin put that in right now
so basically that's going on and then it was also a thing like i don't want to like
you know yeah yeah yeah reverse out because then what if judy sees it and then it looks like we
just like got out of there so now we're just slowly backing out of the driveway just eye
contact with bill well he's just staring at us and we're staring back at bill just being like
we didn't want this our game's at 7 30 we didn't know it's not supposed to be like this don't tell judy have faith in us bill oh my god so we haven't talked to judy
since then but i know she had to think like i just saw that car out there yeah and now it's
oh yeah so i don't know if we handled it the best way but oh it was so funny it was just like this
is such an innocent thing i don't know why we feel so dirty.
But also at Topgolf, we got to talk about,
I'm at the mat.
I'm hitting.
Right.
And then I can kind of hear, there's music playing,
but I can kind of hear Brad.
He's like, oh, what's up?
Yeah, yeah. And I look around, and this girl,
it seems like someone I should know.
This young, blonde girl is just walking by by like, oh, what's up?
And it just like keeps walking.
And I was like, what's going on?
Yeah.
Like imagine like the moving walkway at an airport.
Like, you know, like imagine standing on a moving walkway and just like, that's how fast
she was walking.
She was walking pretty slow, but I don't think she ever stopped walking.
She just comes up to me and says, are you Brad Ellis from Ellis Custom Creations?
And here she is just moving around. I was like, yes, I am. She's like, okay, big fan. I was like, she ever stopped walking. She just comes up to me and says, are you Brad Ellis from Ellis custom creations? And here she is just moving around.
I was like, yes, I am.
She's like, okay, big fan.
I was like, whoa, thank you.
I didn't know what to say.
And she keeps walking.
Like here she is, just keeps going.
And I'm like, what's your name?
And she's like, Rachel, I think.
Was her name Rachel?
I don't know.
I was like, well, that's Jake Tripler.
She's like, oh, cool.
See ya.
Yeah.
She's still walking.
And I was like, that was that's Jake Triplett. She's like, oh, cool. See ya. Yeah. She's still walking. And I was like, that was the most power move ever.
Like to like be interested enough to come say hi to us, but also doesn't want to talk
to us.
Not in any way, shape or form.
I mean, she just kept going.
And that the funniest part is at the end.
Yeah.
I felt shortchanged.
I didn't even like, I don't even know who this girl is.
Cause she knows she's a podcast listener.
If she says Brad Ellis from Ellis Custard.
Like no one says that,
but no one's following me just on Instagram.
I felt like I needed revenge because it seemed like she was less interested in
hanging out.
Once you said,
well,
that's Jake Triplett.
She's like,
all right.
Oh,
then she started walking on it.
Like,
and then she really started hustling away.
It's like,
no,
I'm going to like follow up.
I didn't figure it out.
Like,
who is this girl?
How does she know us?
Yeah.
What's going on?
Is she single? You know? And anyway, I was like, let's go. I need to figure this out. Like, who is this girl? How does she know us? Yeah. What's going on? Is she single?
You know?
And anyway, I was like, let's go try and like track these people down.
Right.
And we thought we knew the general direction where they were.
And I obviously don't really remember what they look like.
So what happens is Brad and I just walking around Topgolf.
Just does anyone aimlessly?
Anyone know us?
Hey, do these faces look familiar to you guys?
Do you think we're famous?
Anybody here? Anybody here recognize this guy? Hey, just real quick on your feet. Does that make sense anybody here? Yeah, who should really go Catholic?
Yeah, okay different group different. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay fence anybody any offense hopping over fence that
Deck if I say deck, what do you think of?
Huh?
Nothing.
Tony and Michelle.
Like a new list.
Don Deas, Michelle.
Don Deas, Rachel.
Not you.
Okay.
Not you.
Okay.
Sorry.
Yeah.
So she definitely left after she said that, which was even more of a power move.
She didn't stay at Topgolf for more than 15 minutes.
Yeah.
It was just.
Don Deas, Michelle.
Or Rachel.
Rachel, if you're out there.
Don Deas, Rachel.
If you're that big of a fan, you let us know. You got to be listening. Yeah. I don't Don De Esmich or Rachel. Rachel, if you're out there, if you're
that big of a fan, you let us know. You got to be listening. Yeah. I don't know what that was so
strange. That was the third time in a row that you've gone to Topgolf and gotten recognized.
And Topgolf is not an easy place to like really be seen. I don't look at anybody else at Topgolf.
Most of the time you're in your bay, your back is turned to any of the foot traffic. Right.
And yeah, you're just kind of isolated. Right. Yeah. Three times in a row. Just
killing it yeah that's
a place to be that's why i like golf i just keep getting recognized yeah the course yeah so many
there's so much foot traffic at the golf course right yeah
trailers are really expensive like 40 foot one i was trying to get like a 10 foot one and it was
like three four thousand dollars for a trip um multiply that that's really expensive
so 40 feet that's one of those that can probably transport like 12 cars on it
like yeah like i'm like why like at that point i would be like please do all the testing like
like swab i want you to swab every one inch every inch possible like be like hurray like you need
like you need forensics to come in there at this point. Yes.
Like I know it's just a 40 foot trailer
you know but to me
that thing is
a lot of money
and I need it.
Yes.
Like yeah
and I like Horatio Kane
from CSI Miami
needs to come.
Like we were talking
about that.
Yeah.
Yeah.
What would he say
if he saw the trailer
being stolen?
He'd be like
Oh hold on hold on
let me get something ready.
You think of what
you're going to say?
Alright alright. You got it yeah yeah okay um hannah would be like i just can't catch a break
and he'll go don't worry we'll catch him for you
what do you think about that i think think that's what he would say.
You need the actual sunglasses, though, you know, to really, like, complete the set.
Oh, no, no.
Oh, we got some.
I mean, those are kind of like sunglasses.
Perfect.
The studio, guys, you know.
Our website may be down, and we may not sell onesies, but we have sunglasses in here ready to go.
Hannah?
Oh.
Oh, I got one.
You got it? Okay.
Hannah, they may have taken the trailer,
but we've got the feature film.
Yeah!
We have the feature film.
Wait, look at that.
Huh?
Okay, okay.
You do it, you do it.
Let me try, let me try.
Well, the trailer's gone. looks like in more ways than one
the wheels are falling off
oh your turn
um this one i'm like bending down looking at it Right okay so I'm like It's a good thing we haven't eaten much today
Cause we gotta go fast
That was so dumb
That was awesome
We gotta go fast
We gotta go fast And We gotta go fast!
And then you drop the music.
Okay.
Oh, man.
Oh, I'm gonna need a little dialogue from you here, bro.
Okay, okay, okay.
Yep. I'm positive.
A woman stole this.
Really? Yeah.
So now we need to trail her.
Yeah!
You did great with your lines.
Let's see.
Looks like the good old Hitler and run.
Let's hope this thief
isn't anti-semi
i don't think you've seen csi miami yes i have
hooray show he puts them on you've written too many children's book jokes. What would a trailer-stealing German say after he stole it?
Hidden?
I don't know.
All right, let me try that.
Oh, you got another one?
Sure, you do.
You think they...
You think...
Yeah, yeah.
You think they...
Keep going.
You think they hitched it up to an RV?
Looks like someone's trying to get their wheel estate license for free.
Come on!
I don't even know how to follow up these.
Oh.
Okay.
Just keep going.
Oh, sorry.
I don't put those on yet.
Hey, we better get on this thing quick
before they scrap it for parts
and it becomes
Trailer Trash. Tray the trash.
Solve this the only way I know how.
Jesse Pinkman and the scientific meth head. I don't know
they're close enough
they're close enough
that the music makes it funny
I guarantee you
I guarantee you
no it's hilarious
it's hilarious
oh
I just
these are so different
than the way I was thinking
about these
these one liners
you think
40 foot trailer
that's pretty big
oh it's a farm trailer
you think yeah you think it's a farm trailer.
You think?
Yeah.
You think it's big enough to fit some donkeys?
Cause we're about to haul.
Leap it out.
Leap it out. Leap it out Leap it out Leap it out
Good stuff
My goodness
Okay so
Justice always prevails
Truth
Betoed
I didn't know if you were done yet.
I was like, hit it! Play it!
Sound guy had a little trouble there.
That's it. That's the end of the line.
Cue the music!
It's like truth be told, but towed.
Like you tow a trailer.
Oh, man.
Northeastern stereotypes.
I think just, like, stereotypes.
I'm walking here.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Like, just kind of blunt about it, you know?
And just like a blue-collar guy just going out on the construction site.
Yeah.
With my lunch pail and my hot hat.
Just going out, getting the job done.
Because Joe Schmo down the street won't do it.
So I got to do it for him.
You know?
Yeah.
Don't get paid as much though.
The union's nice.
Up in his ivory tower.
This ebony tower.
It's cold all the time up here, so I'm a little bit more grumpy.
I'll tell you who's not cold.
Matt Damon.
That man is hot.
Matt Damon was good.
Good Will Hunting.
Good Will Hunting.
I tell you.
Anything that, what's his name?
He's with J-Lo now.
Again, what's his name?
Affleck.
Affleck.
Anything Affleck does.
Yeah. Don't tell my mother I forgot Affleck's name pearl harbor pearl harbor you ever seen that
your big history buff josh hot in it josh hot in the hot dog i mean the gin and tonics up there
just hot dog and i mean any kind of any kind of i have my favorite deli that I go to. It's got salamis. It's got pastramis.
And it's got hot dogs.
We call them hoagies up there.
Before that, though, I start my day with Dunkin' Donuts.
Get that Starbucks liberal crap out of here.
I want Dunkin' and I want it now.
Okay?
Don't give me any cream. Don't give me any sugar. I want it black. Okay? Don't give me any cream.
Don't give me any sugar.
I want it black.
I get sugar from my wife, okay?
From my wife.
Not my first one anymore.
I get it from my second wife.
What's your wife's name?
Barbara.
Barbara.
We call her Babs.
Hey, Babs, get over here and give me some sugar.
In my tiny house. That's right next to another tiny house. Yeah, go Patriots and give me some sugar. In my tiny house.
That's right next to another tiny house.
Yeah, go Patriots.
But go Pats.
This is our year.
I think Mac Jones is going to do it.
Go Pats.
Go Bruins.
Go Celtics.
That's right.
The triad.
Red hour box for life.
Go Sox, huh?
That's what I say.
Oh, call your shrimpski.
A heck of a catcher.
Love me some your shrimpski.
So those are some things that I think.
I'm Catholic.
I don't know.
What other stereotypes are there up there?
I'm Kevin.
I get angry even though I don't need to.
I probably use my horn a lot.
Yeah, I honk, but it's just a communication kind of thing.
It's like how monkeys honk, like howl at each other.
Yeah.
I got one of those vests that goes over my working shirt,
and I have a hard hat, and I go to work.
You know?
That's it.
In my house, we have that famous picture in a frame of those workers
sitting in New York City where they're sitting on the rebar.
Where they're eating their lunch.
Eating their sack lunches over the city.
The industrial revolution.
Normally, I wouldn't support New York because I'm Boston born and bred, but I love that picture.
I tell you what.
Reminds me of the boys.
The boys.
I have friends.
Their names are Vinny, Tommy.
And Skinny Tom. And Skinny Tom.
And Skinny Pete.
And Thrifty Pete.
And Thrifty Pete.
That's my stereotypes.
I hate soccer.
And soccer.
I hate soccer.
Why are we even kicking the ball?
The only guy that should be kicking the ball, Adam Vinatieri.
You hear me?
In the snow.
My pops and I watched that game together.
AFC Championship on a 13-inch TV.
Suck it, Vanderjack.
Suck it, Vanderjack.
Suck it, Janikowski.
Just having a kicker beef.
I forgot about Vanderjack, dude.
Oh, man. we watched that babs was babs was crying she thought it was over i said babe this has been a theory we're talking about you like make him extra italian because you're boston
this has been a theory we're talking about having a little bit of faith in the Vinatieri. So I did what I always do.
I put my hand down my pants and left hand on the matzo sticks.
And I said three Hail Marys.
Three quick Hail Marys.
For the Celtics, come on.
The Irish in there.
I love St. Patrick's Day.
St. Patty's Day is the best day of the year.
We go down to the parade, me and Tommy Jr.
Yeah, named it after Brady.
Didn't know he was going to ditch us.
Thought about naming him Mac, but that's a dumb name.
Best day of the year, St. Patrick's.
Worst day of the year, the day Tom Brady left us.
Every year, the anniversary of that day.
The flag should be in half-mast on that day.
I tell you what.
I'm never going to Tampa again.
I got a timeshare down there,
and I got to sell it.
I don't know.
Yeah.
I do love Tampa, though.
Tampa's nice.
I feel like that would be a place
a guy from Boston thinks is really nice.
Yeah.
Oh, I'll go to Tampa all the time.
It's too bad Tom's down there.
We have a nice timeshare
at the Econo Lodge down there.
Love it.
I love soup.
I love the Jerome Bettis commercial.
There's nothing like a nice chowder in November.
Chowder, that's good.
We don't stop just because it snows.
We fill up our thermoses and go to work.
With our chowder.
With our creamy tomato.
Anything Jerome Bettis was selling those commercials, 50, with McNabb.
Yeah.
He's a Northeast guy.
He loves it.
Oh, man.
Go down to the docks.
Yeah.
Get some lobster.
Go to the, what is the name of that place?
The bagel, the-
The place. What do they call those in New that place? The bagel. The place.
What do they call those in New York City?
The market.
I want to keep saying Winnebago, but that's not the word.
No, bodega.
The bodega.
Not the Winnebago.
You know the best bodega is down with Lenny.
Bodega.
Down with Lenny down there with the hot dogs.
He makes his own relish every morning.
Lenny and his wife, Therese.
Yeah, Lenny.
He used to be a cop.
His father was a cop.
His father was a cop.
Good family.
Good family.
Good chowder.
How's your mom?
How's your mom?
I think that's good.
Is that good?
I feel like I wouldn't like silicone wedding rings.
Feels like something I'd get upset about.
Get that Quelo off my finger. I won.
I won. I either go
24k gold or I lose my finger for
Babs. That's what I
always say. I put silicone around these
sausages. No way. No
way. That's it.
That's all. That's all.
My Northeastern. Did we get it right?
Was that Northeastern yes or no
you lived on both sides next week we'll do phoenix stereotypes might be a little shorter
not as fun they like golf yeah they have shorts on i think it'd be kind of fun to be from a place
that has so many stereotypes yeah you can break some or you totally live up to some right like
there's at least three of those that what's's her name, Kaylin lives up to.
Yeah, probably.
Probably Chowda.
She likes Chowda.
Who doesn't like Chowda?
Cool, Chowda.
I mean, if you don't like Chowda,
it's because you haven't had a good one.
You haven't had a good one.
That's what I always say.
Come to Teresa's.
Yeah, I had a good one.
St. Teresa's, you know, Christmas morning.
Yeah, God bless.
God bless.
We volunteer there.
Get your Chowda, get your Eucharist,
and get on out of here.
Get back to your family.
Your Eucharist.
Oh, man.
I like that.
We could just...
We could do that way longer
than people want to listen to it.
I guarantee it.
Oh, yeah.
That is too fun.
Podcast episode of just dumb stereotypes.
What was your name there?
We'll come back to that sometime.
We should have names that rhyme.
Chetty and Eddie.
You Chetty or you Eddie?
I'll be Chetty.
Okay.
Chetty and Eddie.
Chetty and Eddie.
Yeah.
Real name's Chedward.
Chedward, but it doesn't ring a, doesn't.
But my real name's Eddie.
It's not Edward.
No.
Also, Isaac and Jace all week long have been wanting to spearfish and i'm just like i like good luck yeah you know like i remember like someday at some point or another i've heard like
if you can't hold your breath underwater for like multiple minutes like it's not even worth
trying to spearfish like i think it's like part of like the chase of like trying to find fish and
you know like chasing yeah whatever i didn't tell him that I was like very much like yeah
Y'all do your thing like I will find a time to be doing something else while you're spearfishing
And you know, we were always asking people like do you know anywhere that does like spearfishing and everyone's like I've never heard of
That on Maui not a good sign
Yeah, someone told us early on like I would find like a local boy or something to take you and so then that was
Kind of a funny thing. Yeah. Yeah, Garrett. where's garrett do you know any local boys that we could
talk to um so they finally go i'm like all right you guys do spearfishing this is what i'm gonna
dip out to the podcast i do that they go to walmart buy a bunch of spearfishing gear um
spears walmart's just known for their spearfishing gear too you gotta go to walmart
and they buy like you know goggles scuba stuff
you know fins everything and they go and
Jace
Isaac and Christine are gonna go spearfishing. I do that they go out. I guess the water is just like crazy shallow
They're out like a hundred yards, and it's only like waist deep like alright. Let's go out further
Like somewhere they said between like two or three hundred yards out, and it's still like the head is still not above water
I'm trying to picture that real quick. That's all that's so far out. Yeah, they said between like two or three hundred yards out and it's still like the head is still not above water i'm trying to picture that real quick that's all that's so far out yeah
they said it was like like definitely like multiple football fields out like it was just like very
far just like they were in a weird spot of the ocean i guess um well it starts to be a lot of
like coral and like rock beneath them and they start to even notice like sea urchins are like
beneath them and so isaac and jace are pretty able to like tread water they got like their fins on christine's just out there just uh just swimming along didn't get fed she didn't she didn't once
it starts to get worse jace is like christine why don't i go get you like the boogie board that we
got so you have like something to like float on whatever so just hang tight i guess i mean the
second jace turned around christine steps on the ocean floor steps on a sea urchin like almost
immediately so jace has no idea he's swimming back to the shore um get the boogie board he gets to the
shore and so jace is telling me this story he's like you know because i hear about all this and
hear about like or we're going to you know try to find a first aid kit isaac won't stop peeing on
her or you know whatever um isaac didn't pee on her foot but i kept telling isaac was like hey
christine's over to see her and i was like keep peeing on it keep peeing on that water hey i'll be back i just drank a sweet tea
to come to the come pick me up um but so i knew so i'm like jace i gotta hear the story like what
happened and so he's like so i get back to this where i turn around and like yeah 240 yards out
is isaac just carrying christine through the water and i was just like dang that's hot yeah
that was so cool everything is like a dream. That's like a man's dream.
Yeah.
Like woman in distress.
Christine is like gorgeous.
She's like six years older than Isaac.
So I'd had to feel a little better.
Oh, yeah.
You know, she's in a bikini.
We're on the beach.
Like it's just, you know, she's he gets to carry this woman out of danger into safety.
He's bleeding all over him.
And so I'm just like, dang, you know, what a moment.
I'm sure that was. Just like coming out
of the water
with Christine.
He has a Hasselhoff
moment right there.
And so I'm like,
so I'm thinking a lot
like,
dang,
that's awesome.
So I get like a second
away with Isaac.
I'm like,
dude,
so I was carrying Christine
and he goes,
dude,
it sucked.
That's a lot of work.
That's really far.
First of all,
I had my fins on.
Which I had forgotten about i know i was imagining him being like so cool yeah yeah just like big steps at a time but then now you're imagining like yeah these like massive waves just boom
oh my gosh that's too good dude oh so he goes yeah first of all i had my fins on and so i could
barely walk is it second of all there's still rocks everywhere you know so i'm like somebody
these rocks and they're like so slippery you know so i'm like i'm slipping all the time with
christine you know i've got an extra like human that i'm holding yeah dude and he said it just
got worse and worse because at the beginning most of her was in the water so she was like lighter
yeah and then once she's out of the water he's like i am carrying this girl it's still stepping on
rocks and he goes and to top it off i have my snorkel and goggles on isn't that so funny
this is why i wanted to withhold the story dude it's just amazing like the initial story you told
me right exactly what a boss like he just six pack out of the water just
carrying you know beautiful christine oh my like it went from like day watch to like yeah like
imagine christine now just like getting just like thrown around in isaac's arms just like you know
just set me down i should just walk up isaac's like he's kind of got like a nasal voice because
he's got a snorkel like are you okay yeah maybe maybe
you want to take a break for a second still breathing through the snorkel she's like are
you okay yeah i'm good i'm good i'm good no i'm fine hold on i'm fine i'm fine hold on no just
just a second the rocks are more slippery than i imagined do you think if do you think if i peed
on it it would make you feel better do you think you get your foot below my crotch i could pee on
it we could get some like yeah how how about you you know how do you chicken fight like you want
to just get on my shoulders and do that way oh man that's amazing dude like like the difference
between what i imagined at first exactly exactly
i couldn't like gosh because jace didn't tell me that isaac is in snorkel gear and tripping over
himself and then i was so excited to talk to isaac about it like so it sounds like you became a man
today how was it you just carried over his rite of passage at the man he's like no dude no it's
awful i wish jace was there to play yeah
yeah wish i would have got the boogie board oh my gosh dude that's incredible oh it's so fun so
that was i laughed so hard right there i knew you would love that story i knew it i was like i just
really don't want to tell you this story at dinner i want this to be on the podcast i don't know what
i like more i think i like the fins more but but the the the mask and the snorkel and everything
gets me too it was just so perfect like
yeah just like you like what i was imagining you know it's just so different like such a hero like
zach efron i just imagine you being so excited to talk to isaac just like dude how was it like
good job and he just like puts his head his hands like oh it sucks it sucks baseball is finally back get in on major league action and swing for the fences with bet mgm the
king of sportsbooks log in or sign up to play along as bet mgm brings the real-time action
embraces season's worth of swings with bet mgm your one-stop shop for all things baseball
bet mgm.com for t's and c. 19 plus to wager, Ontario only.
Gambling problem?
Call Connex Ontario at 1-866-531-2600.
BetMGM operates pursuant to an operating agreement
with iGaming Ontario.
What's 2FA security on Kraken?
Let's say I'm captaining my soccer team
and we're up by a goal against,
I don't know, the Burlington Bulldogs.
Do we relax?
No way. Time to create
an extra line of defense and protect that lead. That's like 2FA on Kraken. A surefire way to keep
what you already have safe and sound. Go to kraken.com and see what crypto can be. Not
investment advice. Crypto trading involves risk of loss. See kraken.com slash legal slash ca dash
pru dash disclaimer for info on Kraken's undertaking to register in Canada. You will find it at York University School of Continuing Studies, where we offer career programs purpose-built for you.
Visit continue.yorku.ca.
This episode is brought to you by CIBC.
From closing that first sale to opening a second store, as a business owner, you've hustled to accomplish a lot.
But the rewards don't stop there. When you earn two times more points on
things that matter to you and your business, easily track those business expenses and experience
flexible Aventura rewards, you'll realize how much more rewarding your hustle can be.
Get up to $1,800 in value when you apply for the CIBC Aventura Visa for Business
at cibc.com slash aventurabusiness. Terms and conditions apply.
You know what's great about ambition?
You can't see it.
Some things look ambitious, but looks can be deceiving.
For example, a runner could be training for a marathon,
or they could be late for the bus.
You never know.
Ambition is on the inside.
So that road trip bucket list?
Get after it. Drive your ambition. Mitsubishi Motors.
There are a few other things about that hotel that I didn't mention in that story,
but what I've done, Brad, is I wrote my first ever one-star review.
Oh, okay.
I've never done this before. I've never really even left a five-star review.
Right. I'm not a review guy. I have that written down as one of my shout outs, actually.
Oh, perfect. Right, I'm not a review guy. I have that written down as one of my shout outs, actually. Oh, perfect.
Yeah, preview.
So I want to read for you in the Ghosties Out Loud,
my first ever one-star review.
Okay, I like this already.
May I?
Please.
I'll never forget my stay at the Econo Lodge.
I actually live in Kansas City,
but wanted a quiet, blissful staycation of myself
to be able to focus on some things
going on in my life right now.
Upon arriving, I immediately felt safe. Between myself and the man at the front desk,
there was an inch thick of bulletproof glass separating us. It quickly put my mind at ease
knowing that there are no shortcuts being taken by the EconoLodge when it comes to COVID safety.
As I entered my room, the air felt extremely humid and stale, which I found odd because
the thermostat was only set to 85. After a few hours had passed and the temperature had lowered to a point that petunias could no
longer grow in, I decided to get some sleep. I loved the variety of pillows that came with each
room. I had a tough time deciding between the hard one, the rock hard one, and the one that
was cooked well done. Upon waking up in the morning, I had an itch to get some breakfast.
I also had a tremendous itch to scratch all over my left ankle.
Some hotels will surprise you with a mint on your pillow.
But what I like about the Econa Lodge is that they do things differently.
They don't do things like the big guys.
You know, they're one of the little guys.
And with that in mind, it makes sense that each hotel room comes with several little
guys in the form of bed bugs.
As I laid in bed scratching my ankle until it bled,
I contemplated checking out the continental breakfast to see if they had any donuts.
However,
it wasn't much longer until someone was perusing my long John at around
9 30 AM.
I heard a quick knock at my door.
I promptly hopped out of bed and started throwing some pants before I
opened the door to speak to housekeeping.
However,
manager of the hotel,
Ramesh Patel had other plans. Oh, you got the hotel, Ramesh Patel, had other plans.
You got the name? Yeah. Nice. I love a hotel that goes above and beyond to look after their guests.
I also love hotels that literally look at their guests. Mr. Patel entered my room using his
special keys and immediately started demanding that I move my car. What I liked about this
interaction 15 minutes into my day was how direct and upfront he was with me. No introduction,
no reason why I needed to move my car, just the short, simple demand to move my car over and over
again while I stood there in my underwear like a six-year-old who just woke up from a bad dream.
With the urgency and panic tone that Mr. P had with me, I could only assume that move your car
is hotel code for the building is on fire. But that's what's great about the EconoLodge. Every
matter is taken seriously. Every matter is handled promptly, first thing in the morning, in your room, while one of
you is only wearing boxers. Fast forward 24 hours and I've had another wonderful night's sleep. I
felt blessed that this time I only woke up once in the middle of the night due to the people yelling
on the balcony. I think I speak for most travelers when I say that when it comes to lodging, one of
the main things we're looking for is consistency.
And that's exactly what I got at the Econo Lodge.
Like clockwork at 9.30am, I get a knock at my door.
Once again, I assumed it was housekeeping.
Silly me.
Before I could utter a single word, I found myself once again giving Ramesh Patel
another free sighting of my Free the Nipple campaign.
For those keeping track at home, that's two mornings spent in the hotel,
two unsolicited entrances into my room from the manager, and two exposed nipples per day.
Like I said, consistency.
To summarize, I thoroughly enjoyed my stay at the Econo Lodge.
I would have loved to have given them five stars,
but I have about a million bed bug bites all over my legs.
Not sure if I mentioned that part yet.
End of review.
Mic drop.
Wow.
So all those things were true as well? 100 golly i want to i want to get more into phrases that people don't really know these
days but that like were popular in in the 50s i'm gonna google or 70s or whatever uncommon
idioms great or maybe it's just even like these are awesome maybe
there's even like just like regional things that i don't know about i mean these sound like southern
southern things seem great to me the first one i saw that made me laugh like that are you still
riding the goat riding the goat okay that means that means i have no idea. Still dating that girl.
No, that's inappropriate.
That means you're still on the Chicago Bulls.
You still on your honeymoon?
Yeah.
Cause you're riding the goat.
You're still.
Okay.
Let me see.
Um, oh, this is a, maybe this can help you.
This is a mostly common with the Northern Cheyenne Indian reservation.
Oh my gosh.
Well, say that up front next time.
Please.
I should have.
Um, riding the goat.
I guess that just means like, oh, you were not that far off with the first thing you said.
Really?
Yeah.
Okay.
It means you're still married to that woman.
Yes.
Really?
Whether or not you're separated from your spouse.
Oh, you're still riding the goat.
Riding the goat. Okay the goat okay nice um okay hey hey hey stop ironing my head come on
you're ironing my head stop ironing my head yeah messing with me this has uh oh it's turkish oh
okay next okay third time please tell please tell me the origin origin right up front.
Yeah, it's Turkish.
So it's ironing my head.
Yeah.
And in Turkey, their heads are always bald.
That's why you can iron them.
Yes.
Um, and they, they're big fans of paper mache.
Macha is actually a Turkish word for Mark, a paper Mark on your head.
So stop ironing my paper mache head, meaning mache head meaning stop using my head to do art
class is that what it means honestly pretty close it's uh means stop annoying me which i get annoyed
in art class sometimes yeah it's not that fun yeah it's technical uh yeah stop ironing my head
let me find the order oh the origin of this one one is Looks like northern European. Oh, this is the Czech equivalent of
Blank blank blank blank. That is good. It's a checker equivalent of a phrase we know and it is walk around and hot porridge
Well, that's that's the Czech equivalent
Something in hot water you're in deep water. Oh the good guess beat around the bush. Oh walk around and hot put it for it Hey, just tell me dude. Stop walking in deep water. Ooh, good guess. Beat around the bush. Oh, walk around in hot porridge?
Hey, just tell me, dude.
Stop walking around in hot porridge.
That's way too long.
That's way too many syllables.
Beat around the bush is nice.
So fast.
Beat around the bush.
Beat around the bush.
Stop walking around in hot porridge.
That is way too many.
Like, you're going way too back and forth on that.
Ooh, you want a quick phrase.
How about this one?
Hey, stop emitting...
Stop emitting smoke from seven orifices. That's a quick phrase how about this one hey stop emitting stop emitting smoke from seven
orifices that's a quick one this is uh this is chinese that sounds like you're blowing smoke
stop emitting smoke from seven orifices there's no way that the chinese say that like that they
probably have their own way of saying it in chinese probably that's my my guess that's good
it means to be extremely angry like when you've got steam coming out of your ears.
Yeah. Okay.
I can see somebody emitting smoke from seven
orifices. And being Chinese.
And being Chinese while they're doing it.
Oh, let me find
the origin first. French.
This is French. French-Canadian
or French?
I don't know. Or Haitian. I'm sorry.
I doubt it's Haitian.
Okay, good.
I think just purebred French.
Purebred.
Hey, I've got other cats to whip.
You got to say it like a Frenchman.
Oui, oui.
Hey, Brad, I have other cats to weep.
Is that good?
I have other cats to weep.
I don't know.
I don't know if that's good either.
I have other cats to weep.
Eh, monsieur, monsieur.
No, that's how you do it. You got to do it a little more like cicada. Eh, monsieur, I have other cats to whip Monsieur Monsieur No that's how you do it
You gotta do it a little more like
Cicada
Monsieur
I have other cats to whip
Is that good?
Hey
Hey Monsieur
Le maison is perfect
But I have other cats to whip
Alright let me try it
Let me try it
G'day
I've got other cats to whip
Uh oh
You over there Jacob
I've got other cats to whip Yeah Uh-oh! You over there, Jacob!
I've got other cats to whip, yeah?
Yeah. Is that French?
I think so.
Righto!
I think so.
Yeah?
Hey, man! I've got other cats to whip!
I really want these cats!
Whip them on out of here!
Jesus' love is a-bubbling over!
That was what they always wanted to sing in Trinidad.
Okay, what do you think it means?
Other cats to whip.
This is similar to an... Fish to fry.
Yes!
Oh!
Yes!
You didn't even need the hint.
Nope.
That's exactly what it means.
I know that Frenchmen love to fry cats.
They do.
The documentary Don't F with Cats on Netflix.
Don't whip.
French.
Yeah.
French guy.
He loves messing with cats.
Don't whip with cats is how they call it.
I'm going to just end it with this one.
This is a good one because it involves wood which we love here uh-huh god bless you and may your
mustache grow like brushwood these are so lengthy god bless you and may your mustache grow like
brushwood this is i mean this is mongolish that sounds nice mongolian like it doesn't sound like
being sarcastic but it actually is i don. I don't know if you know this.
It's probably not going to say it on there, but let your mustache grow like brushwood.
Brushwood actually burns very quickly, like a brush.
Sure.
And so they're like, hey, God bless you, but go ahead and burn down there under the surface.
That's what they're saying.
So I guess this is a way that the Mongolians...
Don't believe
everything you read jake they they will it's like after you sneeze but you have a mustache it's like
a way of blessing you and your mustache that sounds like i'm making it up but i'm not so you
think like they're at like a restaurant and somebody like they're like eating over here
hey god bless you oh excuse me i'm sorry god bless you and may your mustache burn like brushwood
like they like sorry i did not see the mustache sorry i missed it it's kind of dimly lit in here God bless you. Oh, excuse me. I'm sorry. God bless you. And may your mustache burn like brushwood.
Like they like, sorry,
I did not see the mustache.
Sorry.
I missed it.
It's kind of dimly lit in here.
Sorry about that.
May it grow like brushwood,
baby.
And if you don't have a mustache,
what do they say?
I think it's a bless you.
May your stubble be burned like the chaff of the field.
Finally get onto this plane.
It's been kind of a mess getting onto it.
And all right, I want you to,
everyone's going to really need to imagine this
because I don't think just saying it
is going to fully translate the feeling of the situation.
So really just, even if you're driving right now,
I'm going to ask you guys to close your eyes.
Close your eyes.
With every head bowed and every eye closed,
I'm going to tell you this story, all right?
Okay.
And if it moves you, I'd like you to raise your hand and at various times i'll be calling out
the hands okay whatever okay so boarding an airplane is already a little bit like
there's people behind me i don't want to take too much time you know especially like i'm putting
overhead stuff like if it starts to get jammed then that's like a starting to get sweaty because
you're like doing like work and right around me so yeah i'm always like it's really warm
when you first walk usually the air is not flowing very well yet yeah people left their windows up yeah it's just it's very hot
and uh so 5 p.m so yeah sun's beaming in there okay i go to my seat 32 f so it's to be a window
seat there is a aisle you're like 32 32 f this is a, I look to my left,
there is a woman sitting in the middle seat
and then like a two-year-old son sitting in the window seat.
Right away, we have a internal dilemma.
Do I say something?
Absolutely.
It's just a little kid, but like,
Papa needs a nap, all right?
And the window seat is nice.
You lean on the window usually?
No, I go straight back,
but it's just the comfort and like I'm against the wall there's something kind of cozy
there yeah i don't have the cart coming by me or people walking by me getting hugged by the wall
a little bit yeah yeah yeah yeah oh yeah it feels nice right now okay so right away i'm like i'm
gonna say something i think i'm just trying to be more direct i think i mentioned that five six
episodes ago i'm saying don't say i think but, I said I think a lot. Absolutely. I would.
I would too.
I think I'm.
So I was direct enough to say something, but not direct enough to not say I think.
So I'm like, I think I'm 32F.
And right away, I'm like, oh boy, she doesn't speak English.
This is gonna be tough to communicate a little bit.
So Augustine should have been there.
Where is he at?
And so I'm like trying to point like me, me window seat, you know, window.
You just like start picking the kid up and putting him in the aisle.
Just grabbing his foot.
Yeah.
So she gets the sign language that I'm doing, grabs the kid by his sternum, kind of like
Packers, same part of his body as if she was chanting Packers at him.
The second she touches this kid,
he explodes
like a firework
on the 4th of July.
I mean,
just,
yeah.
Oh yeah.
I know.
Right away.
I'm like,
oh,
bad move.
Aboard.
I so sorry.
Is he flailing?
How do you love to flail?
Just side to side.
When she's,
when she's full on,
she like just flails
and you can't,
it's slippery.
It's,
she is.
It's like,
it's like,
I can't hold you
anymore she falls sometimes elbows yeah the armpits gets slippery so his kids scream like
oh gosh what have i done not worth it she's trying to just put him in the aisle seat so i'm like okay
clearly they don't care about assigned seats she's like oh okay i'll just put him here it doesn't
matter yeah and so then he's starting to scream i'm like hey don't worry about it i'm doing this
motion hey don't worry about it i can just sit in the aisle and she's like no no no and then meanwhile this
other woman uh looks like like same skin tone as this woman so like they might be here together or
whatever she's yelling at me she's like hey she's trying to get my attention like oh what's up she's
like that's her daughter and then points to like a five-year-old girl in the row behind her so i'm
like maybe she's trying to say that the daughter speaks english so i'm like yeah you speak
english daughter just staring him in the eyes so i and she got a mask on maybe she's doing the
sloan thing like on the road trip like just looking so my head's on a swivel i'm going back and forth
like this other woman okay now the daughter you got 550 people behind you people are behind so
many people behind you just like what's going on on? There's a seat right there, dude.
So then the main woman on the left now is saying like 36, 36.
I'm like, what?
I kid you not.
No, you were in this.
Hold on.
Just wait.
Then this elderly woman sitting like a row behind them.
But in the aisle seat goes to me, sir, can you help me get my arm rest up in the middle
of all this? So'm like yeah yeah yeah
sure yeah yeah yeah just fold it up you're good like so then like yeah yeah of course of course
so i'm like why in the world do you need this up right now hey it's okay i mean she's got like a
breathing tube like this woman's 200 years old like i don't even know why she's on this place
sure and so um so i'm trying to get her arm rest up but to her credit it was broken
so now i can't get the arm rest up and i am sweating i am sweating i can't get the arm
man i'm sorry i can't get it either this is really tricky the kid i'm not kidding the kid
is screaming this whole time like it is so loud it is so chaotic i can't get the arm rest up
now the main woman is like getting my attention again, like touching my arm. She's like, uh, you 36, you 36. I'm like, no, I'm 29 years old. Yeah.
I'm, I'm, I'm not good at reflecting any gram. And so then I finally get, uh, the idea was like,
she's saying, I think she's saying that her son was originally supposed to be in 36 that row,
but she, but she wanted to sit next to him. Like, oh, okay. No, I'm happy to be in 36 that row but she but she wanted to sit next to him like
oh okay no i'm happy to sit in 36 like what seat are you that is a tricky sentence we don't we
never get to the bottom of what seat she's in kid is screaming this grandma now we're back to the
grandma she she gets the armrest up a flight attendant comes up to help her get the armrest
of grandma now says can you help me up so now i'm back on the grandma i'm helping her are you
kidding me this is a true story oh my gosh so now i'm helping up the grandma she's in the aisle now
we're like hugging i mean we are just like you're front to front to front 11th grade year homecoming
come here often or yeah you come uh yeah you got another breathing too uh-huh yeah share some o2
hello oh for two oh for tube so grandma's up i'm like is there anything i
can help like i don't know why she stood up yeah and she's like oh it sounds like you were going
into 36 and i'm like no you're in 33 you're in the row back she's like oh i'm sorry can you help
me with my bags and so then she's like can you help me with my bags are you serious she needed
to move back to 36 she was in the wrong aisle so can you grab my bags and take them back to 36 this is why you fly southwest right here this was
united yeah so i get her bags i hand them to her meanwhile i was trying to direct back to this
woman i'm like do you know which seat he was supposed to be on in 36 i love how you're like
trying to still speak english like like maybe maybe supposed to be on will be in her vocabulary
original ticket boarding pass what did it say yeah d.e.f yeah original purchase
your position on the airplane like i just can't i need you to like really imagine how loud this
kid is screaming and how fast my head is swiveling back and forth between like four different people
trying to talk to me a kid screaming anywhere especially in a confined space is the worst it
just heightens especially when you caused it yeah i kind of did yeah i didn't tickle him but in a way
you yeah you tickled his um angry bone like so then okay we're almost done basically i i don't
ever figure out what row it's or what seat i'm like forget i'll sit anywhere i just want this
to be over i don't know why i cared so much from the get-go what seat it was in so but if you sit go
ahead yep so in that time where i'm waiting for her to try and tell me oh my grandma's now sat
back at 36 aisle seat so now when i finally get back there i gotta move her armrest again i gotta
help her up i gotta like keep her standing up is grandma big grandma's big
grandma's big grandma's big yeah like she had like a light pink like shirt on that has a little too
much cleavage for the fact that she's like 200 years old like grandma i could see too much when
you went face to face with me is that that's what i'm imagining is like this like substitute teacher
like she's substitute teacher for a long time after she retired and now she's like visiting her
like son in nashville or
something trying to get back to milwaukee i did so that's a pretty good picture yeah but imagine
like she had glasses did she have glasses she had to have uh cataracts i don't know if she had
glasses okay okay i don't know which oh she did tell me all of her okay hold on we got to get to
grandma okay so grandma's in the aisle seat i gotta get her back up i gotta hold her up while i'm trying to put my bags up and then i gotta keep her holding up and
then i gotta sit her back down but while i'm in the middle seat yeah and put her back down because
she sat down and it was just like oh my god it was really rough i choose to sit in the middle seat
for now like if no one's in the aisle or in the window i'll eventually take the window and
meanwhile this woman just proceeds to force gut me for the next 30 minutes.
Just talking, you mean?
She never used that as a verb before, but it sounded good.
She forced gut me.
She gumped you.
I think I would put
in my pool, probably juice.
Excuse me?
Like orange? Yeah.
Orange juice? Apple. Excuse me? Like orange? Yeah. Okay.
Orange juice?
Apple.
Apple juice?
Yeah.
Apple juice.
Apple juice actually would be kind of nice, I think.
Really?
Yeah.
Because of like, why?
I like apple juice.
Okay.
I think it's not that sticky.
It's not that tangy.
Orange, pH is off the charts. not that sticky. It's not that tangy. Like orange, like pH is off the charts.
Yeah, true.
It's tangy.
Very acidic.
Acidic juice.
Yeah, I didn't even try.
Did you try?
No.
Oh, that's perfect.
That was amazing how that worked out.
Holy cow.
Wow, I couldn't have wrote a joke that good.
That is a stand-up joke right there.
Dang, that's good.
That's a very good joke. Dibs, dibs. Okay. Okay. I couldn't have wrote a joke that good. That is a standup joke right there. Dang. That's good. That's a very good joke.
Dibs. Dibs.
Okay. Okay. I guess.
You got organic last week, so we're even. Wow. I got to write that down in my notes.
Yeah. Oh, and you could make some joke about like, I want like concentrated juice.
Oh gosh.
I don't know if you want to go that route.
You could.
But you could.
If you're feeling it, if it's a good night.
Like, all right, I'm going to- Not from concentration. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. juice oh my gosh you could but you could if you're feeling it if it's a good night like all
right i'm gonna not from concentration yeah yeah um where's my my note oh my god as i was saying
i was like this is oh my gosh yeah acidic juice dang that's good yo that's not planned. We did not plan that. Yeah, no, we don't need to talk about that any longer.
I don't buy it. I have an I don't buy it.
Okay, let's do that.
Okay, I don't buy deja vu.
Oh.
I'm bullish.
Is that the right word?
Or bearish.
One of the two on deja vu.
Bearish.
I'm bearish on deja vu.
I think it's like this big long con you want to
talk about that yeah cat's name um of just like everyone's just trying to make me feel bad like
wait oh you haven't had deja vu i don't believe it's real and i believe that people that say they
have had it like they're like you have a day you've hair played and haven't deja vued i hair
play almost every day never deja vu vu. Wow. Never deja vu.
No, I don't think it's real.
I don't think anybody's had it.
I think people are just like, and every time it's always like, you'll just be sitting there
and be like, whoa, guys, I just got deja vu.
I feel like it's like you don't know what else to say.
You just say you had deja vu.
I mean, I do like the idea of being on the outside and being like, I've never experienced
this.
You guys have to be making this up.
Yes, it is.
It's a farce it's like
you're sitting like literally sometimes I'll just be sitting
there hanging out talking to my friends and some of us
go whoa
I just had deja vu it's like no you didn't
no you didn't you just remembered
a similar conversation that you thought of one time
that's not the same thing
I mean I hear what you're saying but it also sounds like
yeah you just haven't had deja vu it's like unexplainable no what is happening in your brain what yeah
exactly it's unexplainable yeah isn't that perfect how is thailand it was indescribable
oh okay thanks ryan cool cool yeah exactly it's like uh you wouldn't understand you would just
have to experience it you have to experience it but i can't tell you what what it's like uh you wouldn't understand you would just have to experience it you have to experience it but i can't tell you what what it's like so you don't really know if you've
experienced it just give me one word i can't i can't even give you one sorry you have to you
have to see it for yourself just try this sweet tea oh so you can't see it yeah no that's the
thing you can't even see it you just sense it and you'll never sense it for someone else i just had
it right now oh my gosh oh my gosh have we this before? Wait, do you day job my boo?
I just, I don't buy it one bit.
I haven't had it in forever.
I'm bearish.
But I think I believe in it.
I, but I get what you're saying because no one can explain it.
I've had, I've had experiences where I'm like, oh, that reminded me of seventh grade.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Oh, we're watching Pearl Harbor.
Yeah.
I remember watching that back in the day.
Cool.
Josh Hartnett, Ben Affleck. But it's like, that's different. That's no, it, yeah. Oh, we're watching Pearl Harbor? Yeah, I remember watching that back in the day. Cool, Josh Hartnett, Ben Affleck.
But it's like...
That's different.
That's Deja Vu!
No, it's not.
Deja Vu is when you dream something, right?
And then it happens in real life?
I think that's one explanation,
but I don't buy that.
So what is it?
It's just basically,
you're in the middle of something,
and usually it's struck by something very specific.
Okay.
Like, whoa. Even though, Brad, this is our first time ever in Omaha, Nebraska together, of something it usually it's it's struck by something like very specific okay like whoa
like even though brad this is our first time ever in omaha nebraska together like i am getting this
rush of sensation right now that makes me feel like we have done this exact same thing and then
you said that exact same thing and like this has all happened before okay like it's very like it's
very specific so already seen have you had it everyone's had had it. What? No.
What?
Here I am.
What?
Shopping at the store.
I don't know if that's in the shop.
Here I am.
Shopping at the store.
Doesn't matter.
I mean, you'll get it.
Oh, look.
Deja Vu is on sale for $3.99.
I don't buy it.
I don't know what to say. I don't buy it. I don't know what to say.
I don't buy it.
I think it's a good choice to not buy things that we still can't explain.
I think that's fair.
Yeah.
You know, things that like,
we're still not really sure how this works.
Just don't buy it then.
I don't buy it.
Lift my hands and spin around and freaking sing out.
I mean, what if that was a song like,
praise be to the freaking God almighty, you know?
That's something I would have said back in the day, dude,
in my random prayers.
God, we freaking love you.
Gosh, you are freaking amazing.
Gosh, dang it, you're good.
You had one and only freaking son.
You sent that freaking son to freaking earth to die for our freaking sins guys it's like oh i mean bro it's like you got one son
it's like it's like i can't even take it bro like i can't even with that cross like low-key that was
the best sacrifice anyone's ever made for me like Like all nails, no cap, you know, with what you had going on on that cross brother.
Exactly. Dude. All gas, no brakes, all nails, no cap, you know? So like,
Heavenly father guys want to gas you up tonight. I want to gas you up in front of these people tonight, God. What else? I don't like that.
Bet.
Bet.
Hey, bet.
In Jesus name we pray.
Bet.
Bet.
A little motivational speech because we both are writing big tests in May.
Yeah, maybe big tests.
Yeah.
Writing though?
Is that something that I guess we say you write an essay or dissertation or something?
They say we're writing a big test.
Writing a big test.
Maybe they're professors.
Maybe they are.
Yeah.
They're just trying to make it really hard.
So that would be great.
And thanks for making us laugh each week.
I hope you guys have a lovely day.
Bye-bye.
Okay.
So they need a motivational speech because they are professors and they want to write
a really good running big taste taste uh i'm going to search on youtube motivational speech
instrumental okay and just kind of click the first one okay this one's seven minutes long
do you need one longer than that is that gonna be okay i think i'm good with that
okay we'll just back and forth it. Hello.
What's your name?
Rene.
Rene.
Andre.
The moment's finally here.
It's time for you to write your big test.
I know you've written some teased in the past
You've written tiny teased long teased
Teased you can hardly pronounce
But this teased is unlike any teased in the before
This is the teased that all other tastes wish they were the teased of all tastes this tease gets up every morning and knows it's the alpha teased
alpha teased it says hey hi other tastes you know you're worse than me.
Because I am the big teast.
Now I know what you're thinking.
This is a mountainous teast.
How am I ever going to climb up this thing?
Well, Renee,, I have one thing to say to you.
Put on your Tees Trail shoes and step up the mountain of this Tees one step at a time.
Think of all the people that have tried to go before you with this taste your mom your dad your auntie and your nanny
they've all waited for you to get to this taste they know you can do this
taste they've seen you do this taste I've seen you do it a million times.
Now it's time to do the taste in front of everybody.
A public taste.
I know you're scared.
But pressure makes diamonds.
Diamonds.
Adversity brings you to this point.
And together
with Andarie
you can co-write
the best
frickin' taste you ever did see!
Thank you!
So write your taste! so right you taste that was good that was phenomenal that's great i was gonna go but once you did that i'm like i'm
not following that okay under a is that i don't know so you were saying some words i've never
heard of i'm an english speaker i know well i've never been a little rock so i don't know she was like some words i've never heard of i'm an english speaker i know well
i've never been a little rock so i don't i've never never heard a lot of these words yeah
cultural i hope that was everything she wanted more because i mean that's about as good as it
gets that was great dude the other day i went with isaac lumber mill. Um, I was just like, Isaac, there's this
new, new, new to me lumber mill. Like, and I'm buying something from it. Do you want to come?
And oftentimes he'll be like, yeah, sure. Why not just go expand our horizons a little bit.
So we met this guy, Larry at the lumber mill, Larry owns it. And Larry was quite the interesting
guy. Um, I don't even know where to start. So, so first I guess I'm, I'm building these really cool,
like massive Walnut slab coffee table. So like, it's like one entire piece of Walnut for the slab.
Usually I put like a bunch of pieces together. So it's like big old slab. And those are really
hard to find, like really rare, especially like this one's like 48 inches wide. So like, wow.
It's like, imagine a 48 inch wide tree a massive tree yeah exactly
it's like very hard to find and so uh so and i i literally wanted like the widest uh board that he
had of this stuff and of course that the widest board is on the very bottom of the stack and
usually he has a forklift but it ran out of fuel and so okay at like 8 30 in the morning you're
like can we just put more fuel in it yeah that's what i i kind of had that thought peter's got some water bottles later on i realized
that the fuel is like i don't think it's gas it was some other kind of battery powered something
so okay whatever i but i i kind of said that and i kind of thought i he thought i was a fool or
something for saying that i was like all right sorry fuel is fuel um but anyway and so at 8 30
in the morning isaac and i are like lifting all these
matt like very very heavy the three of us are lifting these heavy uh like slabs off to the side
because idiot brad wants the one at the very bottom so there's like 13 of these slabs and
like we kind of started getting the system down and uh larry goes larry's like holding one in
and he's like isaac you right there and, just wait until your dad gets around the other side and then lift it up.
And Isaac and I both just looked at each other.
Like either, either how old, how old do you think I am?
Or how, how young do you think Isaac is?
You have one of our ages way off.
Isaac has a beard and he's here on like a Monday,
Tuesday morning at like eight 30 in the morning.
Oh,
I would love to know what ages he thinks you guys are.
I was so,
I was so dumbfounded by this.
I was like,
wait till your dad.
That's so funny.
So a few different times throughout the thing,
I was like,
good job,
son.
You know,
thanks dad.
You know?
And I think,
I think he might've picked up on our sarcasm back and forth.
Cause yeah.
Cause like after that, I think he maybe said we up on our sarcasm back and forth. Cause yeah. Cause like after that,
I think he maybe said we were buddies or something like that,
but,
oh man,
it was awesome.
You just wait till your dad gets around there.
Let's go Zanga.
How many friends you got in Zanga?
Zanga.
How did you connect on there?
I think these guys,
they called you their friends.
Maybe you didn't even connect though. I think they subscribed to you. I think it was just like, if you know
someone's username, have at it. You can interact. You can do as much as you want with them. Just
guess usernames. Oh, I love Zynga. Yeah. It was turdferguson17. What was mine? I don't,
it might've been basketballbrad9. That was my thing for most things. Yeah. But I think maybe
I changed it up for that one. I don't though what was your profile picture oh no way do i remember that oh i'm sorry mine was my dog cookie
on the recliner was he reclined uh no she was kind of like oh she was propped up but like her head
was like on like the armrest you know looking cute okay yeah dude well we don't have to talk
about if you want to but that conversation with the dogs the other day, like floored me.
Like I told, I told Catherine and Peter and Sophie about that.
You're telling everybody.
Yeah.
I mean, that was one conversation with all three of them together.
But, uh, yes.
Well, it doesn't matter how we got there.
Cause that's sad.
Um, I don't even remember how we got there, but we were getting off the highway and anyway.
Um, and Jake's like, well, I'll just tell the
whole story.
Do we need to tell this?
I think I want to save this for when triggered by dog stuff too much.
That for Jake loves dogs for the record.
I do love dogs.
Yeah.
I think I want to save this for whenever we have my dad on a page on episode like he will
be the one to hear it from.
OK, because he's the one like. Oh, people are going to that.
People are on the edge of their seat and they're going to have to sit back in the recliner
and wait for Cookie to get here.
I know you guys are curious.
So let me just give you a sample.
We just, we had some issues with dogs.
Let's just say by the third dog we had in a year and a half span, we named him Lucky
because we're like, maybe this will help.
Wait, what'd you say?
How many years?
I want to say we went through our first two in like a year and a half oh my gosh maybe shorter okay that's so
we're like let's name a third dog lucky that's gotta help and then lucky was oh he was an
interesting dog it's like it's like naming it's like naming the big kid on the baseball team tiny
you know like this is ironic right yeah everyone gets this yeah so. So, I mean, lucky. So because of the first couple issues we had,
we, we get an in-ground, uh, an underground electric fence, you know, like this, this might
help keep our dogs in the yard. You know, we're talking to the guy now, is this going to, is this
going to help? Is this going to keep our dogs? Oh yeah. I guarantee it. This thing, this will
take horses to their knees. All right. Great. This should be good enough so lucky is that's an image right there
sorry i'm just imagining that like like just falls to the ground uh right on your driveway like
sorry i got a i got a horse on its knees in my front yard i can't i can't mow the lawn come on
charlie the horse is on its knees yeah so you, we're taking Lucky out to and Lucky's like
a I think like a blue tick coonhound, like supposed to be like a hunting dog. Oh, yeah.
And we take Lucky out to kind of show him the electric fence, you know, show him like how this
works. OK, it's going to beep when you get close. And then when you get on it, it's going to light
you up. You know, we test it out first. My dad's holding his hand. You know hand you know he walks across it i mean it lights him up like a christmas tree okay you know he
this thing is firing on all cylinders so then all right it's time to take lucky on this and like we
got that collar on there tight we're like oh man i'm not looking forward to seeing my right my dog
we just got bad yeah but you know welcome welcome to the party pal yeah boom zaps him so we you
know we're getting closer it beeps all right now
it's time we walk him over it doesn't move a muscle he just he just looking at like what's
going on guys it's a good day for a walk thanks for taking me out here you guys got any sausage
any beef jerky guys thanks for taking me from the pound this is nice guys really appreciate
there's a lot of green pastures around here this is a really nice day thanks for taking me on this
walk i mean you're just standing right over it i think he i think he thought he was getting pet Really appreciate it. There's a lot of green pastures around here. This is a really nice day. Thanks for taking me on this walk.
I mean, you're just standing right over it.
I think he thought he was getting pet.
I think he liked it. He's like, yeah, it's a nice massage.
Yeah, he's doing that thing the dogs do when they start kicking their leg.
It feels so good that they start, you know, twitching.
Man, this feels awesome.
Oh, yeah, this is the good stuff.
They talk about this at the pound, but only the lucky ones get it.
So that was just one of the issues we have with Lucky.
I mean, he was a weird dog we i think we
tied him up to the well one uh weekend when we were uh we were gonna go out of town for the
weekend so we're gonna leave lucky outside we got a lot of land you know he'll be fine
and but he won't be fine on his own we gotta did you say you tied him to the well tied him to the
well had like food and water there and like had like you know angie and john we're gonna make
sure he gets fed or something i don't know they might not even be living there we had a plan a place it doesn't matter yeah
that's just tying something to a well is like so foreign to me for so many reasons but so we
tie him to the well you know this thing goes down 300 feet like it's solid it's gonna keep him there
okay uh he somehow lucky gets him his head like out of the collar like out of his collar like we
come back monday morning from the weekend trip and like the collar's there lucky's gone lucky's run away yeah so we're like oh geez you know
luckily he comes back maybe a few weeks later all right he came back you know i think a few weeks
imagine the things he saw yeah i think quite honestly he loved the or he just missed the
love and attention he was getting from the electric fence yeah he wanted to come back
and feel that yeah you want to get pet again. He went on his, like,
rumspringer.
He went to Rumspringfield.
Yeah.
There it is.
For a few weeks.
Saw life in the city.
Saw some city dogs.
Saw some good dogs.
Some basic dogs.
There it is.
Yeah, I know what you're saying.
And then he comes back.
So we go on another weekend trip
a couple months later.
The well doesn't work.
We get a tighter collar.
And this time we tie him to the trampoline.
We come back.
Trampoline's gone.
Lucky has taken the trampoline with him.
Like, it's one thing to have to talk to your neighbors.
Hey, if you guys see a dog, let us know.
So they're saying, okay, okay, what kind of dog is it?
All right, he's got a four-year-old blue-tip coonhound.
Okay, any distinguishing features?
Yeah. He'll be carrying a trampoline he's got a big huge chunk of metal behind him that would that's probably one of the biggest things that would help identify him i think is the trampoline
behind him that's how you'll know for sure right um so i mean he's just gone we don't have a
trampoline or a dog anymore yeah Yeah. Lucky comes back again.
This guy is lucky.
Is a lucky dog.
And for the rest of the story, I think just to be continued someday when we have my dad
on the bonus pod.
Let's do it.
OK, I love it.
Wow.
It's not talking about planning on talking about any of that stuff.
That's great, Brad.
So I have a follow up from a story last week to share with you real quick.
Okay.
You might remember I told the story of when we named our third dog Lucky and the various
adventures we got into with Lucky.
Yeah.
The underground electric fence, the chaining him to a trampoline and then losing the trampoline.
Is this ringing any bells?
Yes, yes, yes.
Okay.
100%.
Didn't know.
So far, so good.
So I call my dad this past week and we're just catching up.
We talk to each other about once a week on the phone anyway.
And he's like, how's the podcast going?
I'm like, it's good.
We actually, I was like, I was telling a story about, you know, lucky and everything.
I probably got some details wrong, but I was telling about this, this and this.
And he goes, well, did you mention how we poured water on him to try and get the electric
fence to work?
I was like, no, that happened.
He's like, yeah, we didn't know if the electric fence was strong enough.
So when we had the collar on Lucky, Grandpa said, why don't you just pour water on him?
And so I guess, I don't remember this at all, but I just imagine just like, I mean, just
whole families out there.
Yeah, yeah.
Trish, get the bucket.
Yeah, waving at the neighbor.
Hey, neighbor. Like one hand's waving, the other hand's just families out there. Yeah, yeah. Trish, get the bucket. Yeah, waving to the neighbor. Hey, neighbor.
Like one hand's waving, the other hand is just watering our dog on the electric fence.
And the dog's just like convulsing.
Yeah.
Harp!
Okay, Brad, I once again have another follow-up from a story from last week's podcast.
Perfect.
Do you remember that one time on the podcast I told you the story about how we chained
my dog Lucky to a trampoline and he ran away with the trampoline?
Yes. Yes.
Okay.
And then the week after that, I told you that we actually watered my dog to try and electrocute him further so he could feel the pain from the electric fence.
Yes.
Okay, cool.
So it's that same story.
I got to see my grandpa for Easter and I was talking to him about it.
I was like, now my dad is saying that this is your idea.
Do you remember this?
And he just starts laughing.
Oh, yeah.
I remember.
Yeah.
I remember trying to water, trying to water Lucky. And he goes, did your dad tell you about the time he tried starts laughing oh yeah i remember yeah i remember trying to water
trying to water lucky and he goes did your dad tell you about the time uh he tried to run him
over in his car i was like what tried to run him tried to run him over okay so then i talked to my
dad about it and yeah i guess it kind of like took a little like um i think it did something to like
caitlin like it like took a little like bite at her or something or like frustrated
him. And so he just started chasing lucky through the field in our, uh,
in our mini van.
We had a van called the P van because cats would get in and pee.
That's a whole different story. Yes. But, um, yeah,
he tried to run for my dog and I guess that's his life on the farm.
I don't know. He never told us that.
It's just cutthroat. Drive over throat. Yeah.
I think I'm getting a prank call. It says no caller ID.
Let's go. Hey, mama.
Hello?
Hello? Howdy.
Who's this?
Who's this?
This is Tony. Oh, hey, Tony.
I was waiting to hear back from you.
Hey, Tony, do you still... Which barbecue place are you going to these days?
Do what?
Are you calling about the barbecue?
No, I'm not.
Oh, I'm sorry.
What are you calling about?
I got my head the wrong number then.
I was expecting a call from a Tony.
Oh.
Are you a Taurus?
My number is Michelle Adams.
Oh, Michelle.
Here, let me get her on the phone.
Hey, Tony.
How you doing?
Hey, Michelle.
What'd you say? Hey, Michelle. What'd you say?
You heard me.
You picking me up soon or what, darling?
Tony.
Tony didn't want a shot.
Tony.
I went for like,
like Michelle was like an extra on My Name is Earl. Tony didn't want to shut. Tony. I went for like, uh,
like Michelle was like an extra on.
My name is Earl.
And is out of work.
Yeah.
Yeah.
She worked at,
she worked at the bowling alley back in the day.
So kind of,
kind of a,
yeah.
Carton of Marlboro's a day.
That was my character for her.
Darling.
Uh,
that was fun.
You ain't Michelle.
You ain't Michelle. that's the benefit of having
our phones you know now we get that we could do that uh anyway how was your week bro oh man
week's been fine we're recording this on tuesday so it's a shorter week for us
uh but the weekend was busy for both of us so we have plenty to talk about
um so let's see god tony's's calling back again. Okay. You want it this time?
Hi, this is Brad.
Hi, this is Brad.
Who's, who's this?
This is Tony.
Where's Michelle at?
Tony.
Hello.
Who?
Michelle?
Yeah. Oh, here she is? Michelle? Yeah.
Oh, here she is. Just a second.
Hi, Tony.
Yeah, Michelle.
Put Michelle on the phone.
Tony, why are you bothering me so much?
If you don't want to f*** up, that'd be fine.
I'll ignore it in a second.
I won't answer any more phone calls from her*** it up, then be fine. I'll ignore it and I'll answer your more phone calls.
All right then, Tony.
All right.
All right then.
Got to bleep that out later.
Sorry, Justin.
Like, suck it all in.
There's always more toothpaste in the tube, Brad.
Yeah, exactly.
And there was,
was it Tony again?
Different number.
It's got to be.
Tony without star 67.
Yeah.
Eric.
Hey.
What is your name?
Uh, where's Michelle at?
Michelle ain't here.
Stop calling. All right, Tony. Well, you got her phone then. Uh, where's Michelle at?
Well, why you got her phone then?
Uh, no, Michelle didn't because I talked to Michelle the other day. Yeah. Well, you talk to her on a different cell phone then. She's got Boost Mobile now. She switched from Cricket Wireless over to Boost Mobile.
Yeah.
She didn't have Cricket Wireless, dumbass.
She always had Boost Mobile.
It's a government phone.
You got me there, Tony.
Well done.
You've done your research, boy.
Tony, Michelle's not here. For real. Yeah, you have the wrong number sorry Tony uh I don't know how you talked to her but this is the wrong phone number
it's a phone number I talked to her all right just a couple days ago it wasn't I don't know
my name is Jake I live in Kansas I don't even know who Michelle Adams is.
But you can keep calling.
Nice guy.
Did he ever say her last name?
I thought he did.
Oh, that's what I thought.
That was hilarious of you.
Like, I don't even know who Michelle Ray Jones is.
I love that.
I nailed the boost mobile thing.
She's always had.
She's always had boost mobile.
You idiot.
Hey, guys, it's Jake in the cave again.
Hope you enjoyed all of those segments and those bits and little riffs and whatnot of this past year
It's now time to get to the end of the episode and just like we end every normal episode with some singing
these are the best jingles and other sing-song moments of
22 all Brad that's a big one. Oh
Yeah, okay. Sorry Brad just found a diamond a really big one again i gotta go okay you guys have a good one bye-bye
we're gonna do a uh fake spanish song right now called we're burned wait what'd you say
we're burned and fighting we're burned and fight this song is called we're burned and fighting okay
i googled spanish reggaeton instrumental i'm just just going to rap? We're both are. We're going to speak Spanish.
Si.
Para nada a mi.
E managuita.
Paraguita para eso.
Estamos quemados y peleados.
Hola chica.
Como estas?
Que onda güero? Vale, vale. I love the words.
And here we go, Jake.
Mexico de Jefe. Mexico, Brasilia, Brasil, este es amo sin ni capitals
I don't know what else to say hey
Mocadera por tu vida, por riquita toda, sigre agora, para te peor que te va a morar
City Nora, el cine toda si señora, vete por agua, tal vez serás que llora Estamos quemados y peleados
Estamos peleados y quemados
Yo me llamo Brad Voy a abrir la tica
Donde esta el baño? No me gusta
Que donde hay onda y donde hay tona y tona y tona y tona y tona y tona y tona y tona y
tona y tona y tona y tona y tona y tona y tona y tona y tona y tona y tona y tona y tona y
tona y tona y tona y tona y tona y tona y tona y tona y tona y tona y tona y tona y tona y tona
y tona y tona y tona y tona y tona y tona y tona y tona y tona y tona y tona y tona y tona y tona y tona ¿Dónde se pone?
¿Cómo está tu madre?
¿Cómo está tu padre?
¿Cómo está tu hermanita y mi hermano?
Ay, ay, ay Estamos en malo y peleado
Ay, ay, ay
Estamos peleado y quemado
¿Qué onda? ¿Qué onda?
Señorita, señorita, señorita, señorita
Que reguipa, papo, pica, se se ve temoro
Que temoro, que capiza, que otra chistequÃa
Oh, señorita
Señorita
Guatariza
Hola Señorita Guateriza
Hola
Me llamo Tony
Tango Boost Mobile
Te llamo
Michelle
Dime un
Llame
Hey
Hey
Donde es Michelle Donde es Michelle?
Donde es Michelle?
Donde es Michelle?
Dice Tony.
Donde es Michelle?
Dice Tony.
Tony, Tony, Tony, Tony, Tony, Tony, Tony.
Donde es Michelle? We're keeping that in for sure.
That was something.
How long was that thing?
Three minutes.
Oh, it felt like five.
Felt like, like,
felt like cinco.
Cuatro minutos.
Instead of traditional rap battling, Brad,
what do you think about rap affirming?
Encouraging raps.
I think that's how I always do it.
Okay, sorry.
In the very few times of Rap Affirmed.
Yeah, so I don't know what Gabriel had in mind,
but yeah, I think this is a rap battle
based on our wings to bear, really.
Oh, yeah.
And just trying to encourage each other.
All right, so I just typed in rap instrumental YouTube.
I'm going to let you decide, Brad.
Do you want hard rap instrumental,
hip hop rap trap instrumental,
or freestyle rap beat?
Hard rap instrumental.
Hard rap instrumental.
It has hard in it.
Yeah, it's all for me.
It's got a guy in a hoodie.
He looks cool.
What color hoodie?
Yellow.
Okay.
Is that fine?
Yeah, it's okay.
Okay.
It's not as hard as I want it to be, but.
Yeah, it's kind of a mustard yellow.
So who knows how this is going to go?
Let's just do it.
No edits.
We're just going.
Can we just, can we be like really mean when we're affirming though?
Yeah.
Like hard.
I'm talking hard.
I'm talking hard affirm.
Yeah.
Hard mattress affirm.
Just a couple bars at a time.
This brother right here wants to mess with me.
Huh?
He's always one of my best friends?
I guess he forgot.
Yeah.
Most creative guy in Kansas City right here.
Hmm.
Huh.
I can't really tell when...
Oh!
Yeah.
This my friend.
Down here in the basement.
Challenged me to rap battle.
Guess he forgot about the placement.
Of me on the friendship
Numero uno
Don't you forget it
Or I will sumo
Wrestle you and let you win
Cause I love you brother
You are my best friend
Don't forget it
Don't forget it Brad
Don't forget it
You are my best friend
Man I'm really bad at thinking really really quick
But I think your hair looks really really sick
And you have old spikes that's really thick.
And we know that you like Steven Swick.
And we are both friends with him.
His name is Steven.
And we go together like Louis Stevens.
And we like it when we talk about the podcast.
And because the podcast is really fun to do with you.
I guess you forgot that when you put on that hat, boy, you looking hot.
Uh,
yeah,
yeah,
you,
you bagged your dough.
Yeah,
you show her off.
She's a show,
show,
trophy wife.
Uh,
trophy wife.
Yeah,
you bagged her for life.
Uh,
and yeah,
you got a pretty daughter.
You slaughter anyone
who touch her.
She's an otter.
Yeah,
yeah,
I think you're really witty.
I think you have nice clothes
that aren't really bad to look at and we like when we do this recording together with peter upstairs
because we are friends with peter because we're both genuine guys but i think you're really more
genuine than me i with your eyes and then when you look at me with that nose i see the nostrils and they look real nice the beat goes out but i don't no i love
always writing goodies but i'm looking at him and he's wearing that black hoodie and i
uh yeah i swapped to dust and i i'm trying not to but I think I'm feeling lustful Look at him, look at him while he dancing
Look at him, look at him while he prancing
Ay, ay, good luck, good luck
Looking as good as bad while he's wearing the Ducks hat
You know we got this beat that's hard
Jake played basketball, he's a point guard
And he liked to play baseball, no doubt
He was always going like Mike, Mike Trout
Hey, hey
We like Jake
Cause he's from Stratford, Missouri
And he is in a hurry
But he will always
Take time to listen to you
Even when you have tough times
He'll be like
Yo bro, I got you
I got you
I got you
He gots me
Hey
He gots me
Tom, I got you
Oh
I Tom, I got
Sh me I like that rap that jake does with the rapping
so something i liked it jake
bro we selected this episode with jingle yes okay so this one's a fun one um i'm not gonna tell you
who it's by you can guess if you want i'm just kidding it's the same person always is heatherly shout out uh but this one was given to me as a
pov stands for point of view sure for those who are not on internet very often um to the 97 classic
truly madly deeply um but it's it's about it's a point of view of a girl singing to you like
serenading you basically so oh this is a i'm serenading you this is view of a girl singing to you, like serenading you, basically.
Oh, this is a...
I'm serenading you.
This is my baby Judy singing to me.
This was 65 years ago.
Yep, that's right.
Listen in, everybody.
Oh, I don't know this song very well.
I know it well enough, I think.
Hey, what a great 90s beat.
Judy.
Oh.
Be my mommy.
Thank you. Judy. Oh. Be my mommy. Thank you, Judy.
I'll be your friend, root for the Chiefs and help you cook healthy.
I'll make you laugh and cheer you on, help raise a golden puppy.
Just as devoted but less creepy than Joelel goldfick from you i will be here i will be patient cause i'm
praying for a genuine interest honorable intentions a co-host for a family yeah i to sit by you on an airplane.
See your face light up in Hawaii.
I want to hear your jokes whenever.
Even if sometimes you wake up in your own pee.
Oh, come on.
And Secret Santa when I get your
name at Christmas time
give you a teapot
filled with jokes, Tuesday
and he partners and cry
a custom table
for all the friends and all
the Bible studies
when you're surrounded
by the options and decisions of choosing adventure,
each chapter, each chapter you enter,
I'd like to venture there too.
I want to clap for you doing stand-up.
Cheer with Grandpa when you're pickling. Oh my gosh, it's like emotional. Oh, wow.
Oh, my gosh.
It's like emotional.
I don't know the bridge here very well.
This is great.
Oh, one more thing.
I don't know how this part goes.
Yeah, I was born in the Middle East.
Near a pyramid.
Not kidding.
Memphis, Tennessee.
It's true.
I think that's how it goes.
You nailed it.
I hope you're good.
Oh, I think.
Crap, I don't know. Guitar solo maybe.
I hope so.
Mandolin.
I'm gonna go in here.
Yeah, here we go.
I'll film your jokes
in the drive-thru
to put on your story.
Uh-huh.
Your laptop's safe,
I'll steal your heart,
snap for your slam poetry.
Be as devoted,
but less creepy than Gold Drolbert from you.
Ready?
Here we go.
I want to sit by you on an airplane.
I want to travel to Hawaii.
Aloha.
I want to hear your laugh
Forever
Even if sometimes
You wake up in your own
P
And I wanna clap
For you doing
Stand up
Cheer with grandpa
With your piccoline
I wanna dance To you Cheer with Grandpa with your piccoline.
I want to dance too, yeah, at weddings.
Brad's got a lot in common with me.
And how, how.
Wow.
This is when we hold hands and walk into the sunset together, baby.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Oh my gosh.
Did you feel a little like emotionally stirred?
Yes.
It started off as like funny.
Like in my head, I'm thinking like, dang, Heather Lee, like that's so clever. Like instead of just writing jingles about the same essential thing every time, it's
like, no, this is going to be like a new like style.
Yeah.
It's,
that's what I was saying at first.
And the next thing I know,
I'm like,
when she said like,
I want to share with your grandpa at pickleball.
I was like,
Oh my gosh.
Like maybe I didn't want that.
Maybe I'm missing something in my life.
I like felt emotional there.
And then I was like,
I don't like how I'm feeling towards Brad right now.
I gotta like,
I gotta take a leave.
I gotta,
I gotta say the pledge of allegiance real quick.
Uh, are you ready? Yeah. Okay. I'm just gonna set this down. Here we go again
I wrote this jingle for Steve Triplett
He requested it and that's a quest
That I cannot deny
Yeah, you go ahead.
And here we go again
I'm not working with much information.
Just a handful, but I promise I'll give it my best try.
Yeah.
Yeah, this one's for Steve tonight.
Oh, oh, Jake is your son. Oh, oh, Trish is your number one.
This jingle's for Steve tonight.
Oh, oh, you raise two kids.
Oh, oh, Hayden's your favorite.
I'm guessing she's your favorite.
Jake, please tell me it would find rhyme.
Here we go.
Here we go.
Oh, wait. Here we go. Oh we... Oh, wait.
Here we... Oh, crap.
I did it.
Oh!
A letter for the chiefs.
A letter for the chiefs.
A letter for the royals and the chiefs.
Nice.
You go to work each week.
Your work is so hard.
So hard.
And I won't be surprised when you land the next patron interview. So hard. Thanks for your son We're thankful you raised him fine
We're grateful you made him fine
So it's jingles for Steve tonight
Come on, Steve deserves credit
It's our cousin, it's how he did it
It's Steve that gave us Jake
We all should give him thanks
Well, Steve gets a jingle tonight There it is.
This is over.
Here we go again.
You think it's over?
No Probably
Oh, oh, oh
Take it to the top
Oh, oh, oh
Trish and you know the one
This jingle is for Steve tonight
Oh, oh, oh
How do you feel when we talk?
Oh, oh, oh
We're glad love can last us so long
Did the trampoline ever make it home?
This one is for Steve tonight
Hey!
For you, Steamy!
Steve!
We wonder how great you are, but we know you're great because your name's Steve.
Stevie Wonder.
Hey, way to go.
You way to go.
Wow.
Both of you, way to go.
Isaac, way to go.
That was maybe one of my favorite jingle experiences I've ever i've ever been a part of first one in arizona i think