Ghostrunners - 34 - Just Trying to Get My Snoot Booped
Episode Date: December 30, 2019You were today years old when you learned that Brad can't hop a fence. Check out Humble Salt and use code ‘Ghostrunners’ for 10% off: http://bit.ly/2sQ9DcJ Listen to Brad on Cole's podcast: http...://bit.ly/2sDvGDz Follow us on Instagram: http://bit.ly/33WAq4P Leave us a voice memo and ask a question: https://anchor.fm/jake-triplett/message Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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You know what I just did?
I just walked out that door, saw a couple detectives,
and was about to badmouth you behind your back.
But I stopped myself because my pops taught me
that a man who talks behind somebody's back is a coward.
I really appreciate that.
Good.
Because I'm going to tell you directly to your face.
Oh, no.
I don't like you.
I think you're a fake cop.
The sound of your pee hitting the urinal, it sounds feminine.
Okay.
If we were in the wild, I would attack you.
Even if you weren't in my food chain, we were in the wild, I would attack you. Even if you weren't
in my food chain, I would go out of my way to attack you. If I were a lion and you were a tuna,
I would swim out in the middle of the ocean and freaking eat you. And then I'd kiss your tuna
girlfriend. Okay. First off, a lion swimming in the ocean? Lions don't even like water.
If you placed it near a river or some sort of freshwater source, that makes sense.
But you find yourself in the ocean, 20 foot waves,
I'm assuming it's off the coast of South Africa,
coming up against a full grown 800 pound tuna
with 20 or 30 of his friends, you lose that battle.
You lose that battle nine times out of 10.
And guess what?
You wandered into our school of tuna
and we now have a taste of blood.
We've talked to ourselves. We've
communicated and said, you know what? Lion tastes good. Let's go get some more lion. We've developed
a system to establish a beachhead and aggressively hunt you and your family. And we will corner
your pride, your children, your offspring. How are you going to do that? We will construct a series
of breathing apparatus with kelp. We will be able to trap certain amounts of oxygen. How are you going to do that? We will construct a series of breathing apparatus
with kelp. We will be able to trap
certain amounts of oxygen. It's not going to be
days at a time. An hour, hour 45,
no problem. That will give us enough time
to figure out where you live, go back to the sea,
get more oxygen, and then stalk you.
You just lost at your own
game. You are outgunned
and outmanned.
That go the way you thought it was going to nope
nailed it hey everybody it's ghost runners episode 34 it's us
we're here i thought you were gonna say more i i thought about it and then i just
it's us it is another monday uh with jake and brad ghost runners
episode 34 we're live uh we've got a new dongle so uh my voice is gonna sound a little better
it's actually been uh kind of broken the last three weeks or so the dongle not your voice sorry
yeah if anything my voice is gonna sound uh my voice will be more broken because uh coming off
a cold but it's fine i just took i just just did one of those cough drops, Hall's cough drops.
I bought name brand.
Oh.
Since I'm a podcast director.
Sure.
Yeah.
The people deserve name brand cough drops.
Good, man.
So I did that.
Humble brag over there.
Yeah, I can afford Hall's.
Good.
All right.
Brad's pretty talkative today.
That's fine.
I can say more. That's awesome that you can afford Hall's, man. I's pretty talkative today. That's fine. I can say more.
That's awesome that you can afford halls, man.
I like halls as well.
Okay.
Sorry.
Well, we literally just got done watching the Chiefs beat the Chargers week 17.
And then equally as important, just saw the Dolphins beat the Patriots.
Unbelievable.
Which is crazy.
Unbelievable.
Yeah.
We're not good for that.
So that means we don't have to play next week.
Yeah.
Brad and I actually never have to play,
but the Chiefs don't have to play next week.
Do you think it's weird when people say like we,
when it's their sports team?
Yeah, kind of.
That's why I addressed it just then.
Because I'm like, I'm not we.
Like, yeah, we fought hard today.
I just don't know.
That kind of bugs me.
Gosh, we're just not in sync today.
Yeah, I don't know what it is about us.
We just, we didn't give it our all like we normally do i'm totally that guy i say we
i address most of the players by their first name by their nickname like come on charverius like
what are you doing out there um yeah i can't believe that the chiefs are the two seed yes we
got a buy we did yeah we did we have a buy we as a city which is awesome because
i was supposed to i am going on my uh anniversary wedding anniversary uh dinner that night we have
dinner date i was telling katherine was like kath the chiefs might be played on saturday
and she looked at me like you were there she was like what are you trying to say i was like i think
you know what i'm trying to say i can't make it any clearer than this i don't want to say it out loud but i think i think you need to read what i'm trying to say
here uh she was like no no what are you trying to say i did not say it because it's i'm smart
enough i've been married enough years to know good hey don't don't go too far here so and i'm
filming a wedding saturday too which is oh there it is that happened quick uh it um sorry yeah
filming a wedding saturday was which would have been very hard to watch a Chiefs
game while doing that.
So now, no conflicts.
Work it out.
Everything's going well.
Everything's going well.
How was your Christmas, dude?
It was great.
We went down to Texas and visited Catherine's family.
Yeah, they opened gifts on Christmas Eve.
You do that in your family?
No.
Me neither. They opened almost all the gifts on Christmas Eve. Whoa do that in your family? No. Me neither.
They open almost all the gifts on Christmas Eve.
Whoa, all of them?
Or almost all of them?
Yeah, the only thing they do on Christmas morning is stockings.
Oh.
I don't love it, to be honest.
No, no, no, no, no, no.
I'm a big fan of waiting until you, quote unquote, deserve to open presents, which I
know you don't ever really deserve it.
But sometimes Catherine will give me five birthday gifts or whatever and be like, do you
want to open one the night before? And I'm like, no, I want to wait. I want to get them all on my
birthday. You know, same with Christmas. I could even see like opening one the night before it's
a little teaser into what tomorrow is going to be. That makes sense. But opening the majority
of the day before is not, it's silly. It is. It's a little silly and it makes Christmas morning
not as exciting. It
goes by super fast, I'm sure. And the, yeah, the stockings are just like, thanks for the gum.
Oh, I didn't need new gloves. It took us, we went around, every single person opened a gift,
you know, individually, three hours for just the adults to open gifts.
Oh, cause you go like one at a time. Very much one at a time.
And then like, you know, like,
Oh, and let me tell you about how I got that gift for you. I was at the fair and I thought of you.
So I got, you know, it's like, there's always a story or there's like, Hey, let me model how to
use this gift or something. You know, it took a long time. And so like now people in Catherine's
family are like trying to like break it down and like get like, okay, what's the strategy for next
year? How are we gonna make it shorter? How do we cut this down and everything? It's pretty funny. And I'm kind of one of those people. I'm
like, I'm okay with it being long, but, um, anyway, so it was a long, long, good time.
Hattie loved it. Love got, got her wishes of Mr. And Mrs. Potato head. That's all she really
wanted. Oh, that's it. Yeah. And she asked Santa for Mr. And Mrs. Potato head and uncle Sam got
her Mr. Potato head. She said America. Uh, yeah. Uncle Sam. Yeah. Her tax sam got her mr potato head she said america uh yeah uncle sam yeah
her tax dollars got her i was like what her sorry yeah that's fair katherine's brother sam who is
her uncle got her mr potato head the uh i want you the government uh that's funny what did you
get what was your favorite gift that you received oh man
favorite gift was probably the gift of love for my family uh second favorite gift uh i got some
nerdy woodworking things they're called quick they're called setup bars okay and they're like
60 for these like basically these big metal bars that you just can do quick you know measurements
with it's it's pretty nerdy and
pretty uh like you don't need it for woodworking but it's like very nice things certain things
faster maybe yes much faster setup bar yeah quick quick setup so uh that's probably one of my
favorite i don't know i got a lot of fun things um and did you guys drive back we did which is
kind of a strategic thing because and katherine's always thinking that because I'm always like let's fly but we have so many presents that we're like filling up the car
on the way oh so um that is a good point yeah she's smart smart girl so how was your Christmas
time Navidad uh my Navidad was bueno uh no it was really fun yeah uh my family is just really fun and funny like just like my my like dad's side of
the family is really funny and so it's just fun to be around them like his parents are hilarious
to be around um his sister and uh her husband coach john right who you know crazy coincidence
yeah yeah maybe we should you know what actually yeah not? Why do we keep postponing it? Tell the location was firehouse subs. We were talking about how
my sister used to be a cheerleader when she was like third grade for Darren Sprouls.
And you're like, Oh, my cousin used to play on Darren Sprouls football team. Is that right? Is
that how it's going? It was my uncle. Yeah. I think it was the coach. Yeah yeah my uncle was the coach of darren sproles football team like i've seen home videos
of darren sproles who if you don't know who that is long time nfl running back future hall of famer
take it i have a bet out is darren sproles gonna be all in favor i say yes the rational person says
no uh anyway long time nfl running back my uncle happened to coach him and so he's got these cool
home videos of darren spros scoring touchdowns when he's
like in third grade.
And I don't even know, like, did I ask you then?
Like, what's your uncle's name?
I don't know.
But you're like, yeah, you know, whatever.
Coach John Fulbright or something like that.
I was like, wait a second.
That's like, I know him like Steve Fulbright.
It was my age.
And we played baseball together for five, six, seven
years. We played forever. And we pieced this together when two, maybe a year and a half ago.
Yeah. It was, it was very far into our friendship. Three or four years into our friendship. We
pieced this together that, wait, you know, my uncle and my cousin, because you played on their
baseball team. And then Steve and his parents moved away from Kansas city to go to some random
nowhere town in middle of nowhere, Missouri.
It's next door to Jake. It's Clearwater Lane, baby. 65757. Like literally you could see their
house from your house, correct? Oh yeah. Like you're like basically not on the same property,
but yeah, the same plot. Yeah. Yeah. It's right there. Um, crazy. So long, long, uh, small world,
long, small world. It's a long, small world after after all tell that to kairi tell that to the flat earthers out there it's long and small i'll tell you that right now
um so anyway so fun fun times with the family no i'm gonna we're gonna stay on this a little
bit longer because i don't know if you remember this but they so you still get talked about by uncle John, uh, from a certain story.
Oh no. I know what story you're going to tell. You know what it is? Probably if you're laughing
so hard about it. Okay. Well, I'll just start it off and you tell me if you know how it ends.
I'll tell you exactly. I'll tell you one word right now and you'll say, yeah, that's the one.
Fits. Yeah. Frick. All right.
Yeah, you should tell everyone.
No, no, no.
You go ahead.
Tell your side.
I want to hear what the... I mean, basically what I've heard is it's very short and sweet.
They went to the practice field one day and the gate was locked.
And so they were just asking all the kids like, oh, just hop the fence for practice today.
And I don't know how old you were at the time but
you just i was old enough as much as you might try you could not get uh your body over that fence
and you just skip practice you just went home because you couldn't hop the fence okay okay
that is for all intents and purposes that is true uh. Uh, I was, yeah, I've always been a big kid,
not, uh, not the most, um, vertically gifted guy in the world, you know, gravity,
gravity one, a lot of times. Um, it was the reason that the, uh, gates were locked is because we were
practicing in like February. Like it was like crazy. Oh really? Maybe March, but it was like
very early. Uh, coach John, your, your uncle, he was starting to get real competitive. Yeah. I'm going to throw it back on him a little bit
here. If he's, if he's telling this narrative, you know, I'm just kidding. Um, but yeah,
because of that, it was, and I did not want to be out there. It was freezing cold. He started
like starting to condition us for baseball. I'm like, why do we need to run so far? It's like
60 feet to each base here. Come on, man. And so I just didn't want to go to practice. I, I think I, I overacted a little bit and pretended like I couldn't get over that fence.
I think I could have, if I really wanted to, but I was like, mom, I can't do it. I think we just
got to go home. And my friend Scott, we gave Scott a ride and Scott laughed at me pretty hard for not
being able to get over this fence.
But I didn't care because I was like, I don't want to go in this freezing cold weather and run for baseball.
I'm going to be home drinking some hot chocolate.
So that's my remembrance of the story.
But I did get a lot of hard time for that.
Yeah.
I'm glad you remember it.
I'm glad that it's being passed down to people
yeah that's one of the few things they remember about you i think is uh not being able to get
i had plenty of good memories man i they uh they said you're a good pitcher i i was a good pitcher
in my in my heyday see and uh and that's it that was about it those two things i do have a pitch
no but uh yeah the the whole fulbright family is hilarious i i
put this on my instagram story but i get home and my uncle has bought an entire pickleball set
his drawn his went and bought sidewalk chalk and made you know this pickleball court in his driveway
and my dad and him are just playing one-on-one pickleball and had been for hours by the time i
even showed up and so yeah we played some pickleball this christmas you know had the
lawn chairs out there
for grandma and grandpa or whoever else wanted to watch.
Love it, dude.
And yeah, it was fun.
It was fun just laughing.
It's crazy.
Pretty much anytime our family's together,
just learning more and more
about how different things used to be.
Like just hearing like my dad tell stories
about how many fights he used to get into
and just like wasn't a big deal back in the day.
I don't know if that's more of a eighties thing or more of like a country bumpkin kind
of thing, but maybe both.
Yeah.
Maybe a combination, but I feel like nowadays, like you can't get away with anything.
Yeah.
Of any sort.
Like, yeah, you go to juvie for looking at somebody the wrong way.
He was looking at me racist, racist look at his eye.
I knew it.
Yeah.
I was listening,
or I was listening to a story
from William Hanna,
another one of our friends,
Wild Bill,
as I call him.
And he was telling a story
about how they got caught,
like sneaking into the country club
one time in Newton, Kansas.
And just like the cop was just like,
all right,
get out of there.
Hey, come on boys.
Like nowadays it'd be like,
you're arrested or something for that. I feel like, yeah. Or at least getting
in trouble on Snapchat. I don't know. My dad and grandpa were telling stories about just like
old timers and things back in the day. And they're telling us one story about a guy who
he was like an old man when he was doing this, like was not like the 16 year old that it's
going to sound like in, in front of his property, like in his front lawn there's a sharp turn on the highway so cars would have to slow down quite a
bit to make this turn and so he would hide in the bushes with like a five gallon uh bucket or like a
50 gallon like bucket of water and back in the day no one had air conditioning and so they would just
drive with their windows down and so he would just wait till cars would go around this corner
and just douse people with water just in their car old man would just wait till cars would go around this corner and just douse people with water
just in their car.
Old man?
Yeah, just an old man.
We just do it like as a prank.
What are you doing?
Just douse people with water.
Oh my gosh.
That's the good old days.
That's so funny.
Surely it wasn't 50 gallons.
Maybe it was.
Isn't that what they're called?
The 50 gallon buckets?
The drums?
They're like the drums.
Oh, so I...
Five gallons.
So it was five gallons.
I second guessed myself.
50 gallons like that big trash can right there. That's a lot that's a lot of water it was a
strong this guy was yeah uh what's his name the andre the giant was was around the corner yeah
he had uh marf marfian syndrome yes uh anyway it was a five gallon bucket i guess either way yeah
he just doused people with water just as a prank just for fun it's like very big daddy you remember
in big daddy when they're like going around the curve with the rollerblades
and stuff?
He throws the stick out.
Yeah.
Yeah, he said that guy would also just like lay down on the road.
What?
And just like as a prank, but just like lay down in the middle of the road and wait for
people to like stop to try and help him.
And he'd like get up and be like, gotcha.
Gotcha.
Yeah.
That guy needed to find more fun things to do with his life.
But that's pretty funny it would
be more funny if you had a friend doing it with you or something yeah doing it by yourself is a
little strange so i think they say like yeah this guy was just you know always a ball of fun but
like never married and never did any of this or that just love pranking people i guess so i don't
know i guess that was i don't know something he he did. But overall, Christmas was good. Just got back last night.
Excited to be back in Kansas City, I guess.
Good.
Got a big week coming ahead or what?
It's continuing more Christmas coming up, which is...
What do you mean?
Like we have Christmas Eve, quote unquote, tonight with my family.
And then Christmas morning tomorrow with my family.
Oh, no way.
Yeah.
So we spent time
with katherine's family came back did like our extended family christmas there was 44 of us
there yesterday geez and we figured out that if my cousins who were in chicago for missions trip
thing and then these two new babies that we're having not i'm only having one okay i have another
one in our family there's gonna be 50 people next year at christmas uh which
is just nuts it it's pandemonium dude like it's 50 people just for one side of the family it's
christmas my mom's side she has six she's one of six girls and so yeah the the families are just
multiplying that's crazy we get everyone together and there's like 11 of us both sides of the
family really yeah it's it's getting to be nuts it It's like organized chaos. And I think I'm the,
I'm like one of the youngest, I'm like the second youngest original cousin, I guess you could say.
And so I was so used to like everything being so organized and like, I was the one that was
making the chaos. And now it's like, I don't know, this is crazy in here, man. Like all these kids
just flying around everywhere. Maybe we just shouldn't do Christmas next year. It's going
to get too crazy. There, there though though there's like seriously like gonna be a
tipping point i think which is so we're i don't i think we're gonna fight that as much as possible
but someday if there's 70 people in this house yeah like what are we gonna do like we're not in
we don't none of us have huge houses and it's cold outside we can't just go outside or you know
we might have to rent a community center or something.
I don't know. Wow. But anyway, uh, it was, so that was fun. But then tonight is the Ellis family
Christmas or tonight and tomorrow. So lots and lots of gifts. Hattie is getting more gifts than
she ever needs. Like there's so many random things in our house right now that we're like,
where do we put this now? Is she like happy with the gifts or is it like, okay, play with this for
a day? So far she's loved everything.
Yeah.
She's really into puzzles, which I'm excited about because I just want her to be a genius.
Yeah.
I think that's, you know, she's on her way with puzzles.
But yeah, Christmas coming up in another couple of days and then getting busy with work, which
is exciting because I've been pretty slow.
That actually makes me really happy.
I'm glad to hear that.
Which is good.
I got some big orders coming up and made a lot of cutting boards this past week and actually wrote
this down as something to talk about uh one of the things that you put on cutting boards like
kind of finish it is called mineral oil which is like food safe oil basically um but i learned to
like sterilize it in a way yeah to kind of seal it up like to make it yeah so that you can use it
for food and everything um
without it getting like just into the wood and staining it okay um and so i learned that the
best way to go or best way to find mineral oil is to go to a normal like walmart or whatever
and go to the laxative section oh and so here i was uh going to the laxative section
and buying like four different big you know bottles of this mineral oil
and i'm sure people are just thinking like what this poor guy this dude had a few too many
glasses of eggnog or something i don't know what's going on over here clogged right i was just like
you know just looking green as i'm putting on the cashier's counter no not really that seems
dangerous that what you're sealing the cutting boards with is laxatives it's a natural it said on their natural laxative i
don't know what that i don't know i don't know what that means but i just know it's food safe
yeah obviously you're not ingesting much of whatever that cutting board is just because
it got cut on it yeah i guess doesn't mean you're yeah i don't know i don't know how it works to be
honest but um anyway i thought that was funny it was kind of like an awkward thing like you know
like because i'm trying cause I'm trying to,
I'm trying to like, I'm in the laxative aisle, like looking around, trying to see what I
want it.
You know, all these people around me, I'm like, yep, here I am.
You know, it is kind of funny when you find yourself in those situations.
You're like, I wonder if other people are noticing what's going on with me and if they're
making any judgments or not, because it would be pretty easy to totally in this scenario.
Totally. or not because it would be pretty easy to totally in this scenario totally um one of my uh friends
i'm trying to think if this is an appropriate enough story yeah yeah i think it's fine
so my friend kevin smith you know somewhat sure katherine went to college with him i knew this
guy from uh canna cook summer camp he told us a story one time about him and his buddies would
always have these you know consequences if you lost a game or you you know finish last in this or that and one of
them that he told me that stuck with me was had to do with walmart and like checking out and so
it was like these two losers of some competition had to go to walmart and in their shopping cart
uh you know you had to have some like pretty you know inappropriate things in there, you had to have some like pretty, you know, inappropriate things in there. So you
had to, in your shopping cart, there had to be, you know, some zip ties, some whipped cream,
some handcuffs, and then some like KY jelly had to be in there. And so what, how it works is you
start checking out with all this stuff and, you know, you don't say anything about it and, you
know, it's already awkward enough what's happening. And then when they ring up the KY And, you know, you don't say anything about it. And, you know, it's already awkward enough what's happening.
And then when they ring up the KY jelly, you say, wait, wait, wait, how much is that?
And then whatever price they tell you, like, oh, okay, that's way too expensive.
So then you send your buddy, you say, hey, go get the other stuff.
And then the other guy has to come back with Smucker's grape jelly.
You're like, ah, that's better.
That's the stuff.
It's such an elaborate consequence.
Is that natural preservatives over there?
Yeah, I always thought that was really funny and stuck with me over the years.
Gosh.
It's a great consequence.
There's like two parts to it.
Yeah, yeah.
Because like the person's already like thinking you are a freak.
Like, you've got to be kidding me.
Coming to Walmart.
And then you're a cheap freak.
And like not a very sanitary freak wow that's amazing um i saw something on uh twitter this week that i thought maybe we could talk about i don't have it in front of me which would have
been smart i don't really remember anything about it other than it was just like well that way it's
good at least we're not stealing jokes or stealing answers from other people i just remember the original thread was just what are your like
what are your candidates for like worst phrases uh of the past decade that made themselves super
popular got got to wrap it back okay we've already talked about love you a long time hate it okay
yeah yeah i also have a very strong opinion about this phrase, sorry, not sorry.
Okay.
I hate it.
Tell me about it.
It is like the most inconsiderate, rude thing that you could say to me, I think.
I just get so offended every time someone says that to me.
Yeah.
Oh, sorry, I'm not sorry.
Or sucks to suck.
Oh, sucks to suck might be worse than sorry, not sorry.
Oh, yeah, sucks to suck, bro.
Okay. Let's go. Iucks to suck, bro. Okay.
Let's go. I got Jack Johnson, Tom O'Leary right here waiting for it. You know, like I get so frustrated when I I'm ready to throw fists right there. Um, yeah. Hate those phrases.
Sorry. Sorry. Not sorry. Um, I have one more. I'm so sorry. I'm just spouting them out. Okay. Yeah.
This is kind of a more recent one, I guess the the last couple of years. And it's more of like a Facebook post thing, but people always are like,
need recommendations for good crock pot recipes, dot, dot, dot, go. It's like, it's like people
are like all waiting on their computer. Like, okay, okay, okay. And go. Okay. Like they just
are furiously typing or let me, let me find that link on Pinterest and put it on here. Like, no,
no, no. Like, you don't have to say and go.
This isn't the start of the Kentucky Derby.
You don't need like a 3-2-1 countdown for me to give you recommendations.
Everyone knows it's time to go whenever the post is done.
When I stop reading, it's go time.
Okay, go.
And go.
I just could not.
I'm like, what are you doing?
You don't need to say that.
That's so funny.
I've definitely noticed that too.
I'm like, why are you so...
And go.
Oh, guys, Go crazy down there.
Let me see your recommendations.
Yeah.
Yeah, that's an annoying one.
That's a really good one.
Oh, man.
I should have written...
I had several come to mind as you were saying them.
I got more.
Okay.
Ask me for a friend.
Also don't like that one.
Oh, because it started off as funny.
Yeah.
And now it's so overdone.
Oh, way overdone.
Ask you for a friend.
Not funny.
Same with, oh, didn't see you there. that started off as a joke to when the camera starts rolling
Yeah, and now that is so unfunny to me, right? I can't stand that. Oh didn't see you there
Hey guys, welcome back to my vlog or whatever. It's like we don't know how to start this
So we're just gonna say oh didn't see you there. Yeah. Yeah the phrase
This is kind of similar to sorry not sorry sorry. And sucks to suck. We're
just saying the same thing twice. It is what it is. If anyone ever says it is what it is,
it's because they don't know what to say at all. They have nothing else.
You won the argument. If you're talking about something and say it is what it is, man.
Congratulations. They lost. Yeah. You're done.
Done chain. Hey, let's do a sample one. Brad, I think Qdoba is way better than Chipotle.
Well, I think that Chipotle is better.
It's got better natural ingredients.
You know, it's cheaper if you don't choose to get queso and guacamole.
And overall, everyone else just agrees with me.
Okay.
Well, it is what it is, man.
You've been owned.
That phrase always bothers me. It is what it is, man. You've been owned. That phrase always bothers me.
It is what it is.
It's someone who doesn't know what in the world they're talking about.
Yeah.
Anything with bad grammar is really popular.
And I can't stand that either.
So a couple of examples that come to mind.
I was today years old when I found out that that, that, that, that.
Sure.
I cannot stand that.
Today years old?
Are you four years old? Because that's not how you talk. Yeah, that's, I was today years old. That's sure. I cannot stand that today years old. Are you four years old?
Cause that's not how you talk. Yeah. That's I was today years old. That's a good one.
I was today years old when I found out Macaulay Culkin was asked to be in home alone three and
said, no, I was today years old when that happened. That is so, that is so funny. I, I've,
I had a thought about something like that. I don't remember what I was going to say,
but I was going to tweet something similar to that, like making fun of that.
Also, when you said bad grammar,
I never thought that those cat memes back in the day were funny.
When it was like, I can has cheeseburger.
You don't remember those?
It was when we were in high school.
It sounds dumb.
It was like, oh yeah, they are.
They're like purposely, yeah, misspeaking.
Like I can has cheeseburger. I don't know oh so dumb yeah well
i was gonna say anything to do with dogs nowadays is starting to get pretty annoying okay like
calling every dog a good boy i'm okay with that i guess but when it gets to be like
he is the goodest boy yeah now you're combining bad grammar and the dog thing what really uh
i was trying to think of something like grinds my gears but i
couldn't think of anything that what really irks my what really irks my intestines is uh when they
talk about dogs getting their snoot booped oh my gosh what does that mean i something like their
nose or their mouth like kissing it i don't even know what it means i meant neutered like yeah we
got a got a snoot boop what was it snoot got both of us snoots booped right out uh i have not heard that phrase it's like oh looks like a good
little boy needs his snoot booped oh you don't see it that often but i anything with dogs like
that we're just like trying to be overly cute quote unquote uh that's the next thing that you
have to say whenever you get uh the grape jelly in line is like yeah I'm sorry
just trying to get my snoot boop
hey I mean it is what it is
you know what I mean
YOLO was another one that was like
I'm over this in two minutes
that didn't take very long
that's a fun question
puppers
most dog things are going to be annoying to me
yeah if i really think about it but yeah get my snoot booped get out of town with that that's
funny so silly to me i thought it was funny well we're pregnant again but like the first time we
were pregnant uh all the people in the medical profession and maybe just pregnant people are
talking about pregnancy in general always talking like third person about your baby, but they don't say your baby. They just say baby, like, um, baby's doing fine. Uh,
you know, baby has a normal heart rate. Like when it's like in your body, like, you know,
and it was always weird to me. I don't know that that made me think of when you were talking about
puppers and stuff. Like for some reason that like always kind of just sounded weird to me.
Yeah. No, it does sound weird. I'm surprised they do that.
Maybe, maybe it's just normal and healthy, you know, uh, maybe it's just feeling great.
You know, it's like, huh.
Do you have friends on a similar note?
I've had friends who will refer to their mom and dad in that same way.
Like instead of saying, yeah, my dad was telling me the other day, I was like, dad just got
off the phone or whatever.
And it almost sounds like improper English at first because you're not expecting it.
It's like we share a dad, but it's like, no, it needs to be possessive in some sense.
Like my mom told me, not like mom was telling me the other day because we don't share it.
I feel like that's something Peter would do.
I don't know for sure.
But our friend Peter, I feel like that's kind of something he would do.
We'll test him.
We'll throw him in some bait and see if he falls for it.
Yeah.
Okay. That's a fun question.
I'm trying to think if there's anything else, any other phrases.
If J.N. Levinson Gold was here, she'd probably say yeppers or yesh.
Yesh.
I love that.
What else just really drives me crazy?
I guess maybe that's it.
That's it for now.
Okay.
I've been consuming a lot of eggnog lately dude nice yeah which i know that you well yeah you've had some ups and downs with
the dairy um products oh yeah i can give an update on my stomach too also i haven't had soda oh i
just had it today dang it six days though days though before that. Really? Yeah.
And you've been getting sick.
That's true. I'm not... Just saying. I'm not saying it's a direct correlation, but I'm just saying.
I'm just saying it is what it is.
It is what it is.
Okay. Sorry about the, about your nog.
I think that, and I should have come more prepared with other ideas for contenders.
Eggnog is the best product with the worst name in the world.
Okay.
Is there anything like eggnog is amazing, but it sounds nasty. It's like growing up. I never
tried eggnog because it was like eggnog.
Nog.
Nog. First of all, nog is an innuendo, I think.
Yeah. Yeah. It sounds way worse getting your snoot nog.
Yeah. I couldn't even say it.
Getting your nog booted. snoot nog. Yeah. I couldn't even say it. Your nog, nog booted.
Get my nog booped.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Like there's something there like that just not, does not sound right.
And then.
I would agree.
Any kind of drink that has like just the word egg in it, it does not sound appealing.
It already sounds like something I don't want to be drinking that way.
Like, is there anything else that even is close?
First of all, do you like eggnog?
Uh, too scared to try it.
See?
See, you're, you're living proof i am i never
tried it ever no oh you would love it well i know that i don't like eggs and that is sure three
sixth of the word well but you like frozen custard yeah it's kind of the same idea i think okay it's
like eggs are in frozen custard eggs are an eggnog but the word like if they started calling it
custard milk that's not much
better, but okay. So it's funny. Trey and I just talked about this on Christmas custard would be
a cool name. Yeah. Trey and I just talked about this on his podcast about how bad the name eggnog
is and it's bad for its brand. Yeah. And so I, I totally listened to that. I totally knew that
must've been how I thought of this. Uh, I was trying to think of new names for it too, but
Christmas, wait, what'd you call it?
Christmas custard is way better.
Christmas custard.
I came up with silk juice.
Oh yeah, that's bad.
Yeah, it's not that good.
Or just something that just elicits like a,
like just warm feeling, like Christmas cheer,
like something very vague.
I was just trying to think of the letters themselves.
Like when Dwight's talking about murder
instead of muck duck,
I was like eggnog is very like harsh and aggressive.
Yeah, like a lot of G's.
Silk juice. Oh, that's nice. Silky juicy. Christmas cheer is good though. Christmas
custard. Those are all good. Anyway, I just thought of that the other day because I was like,
eggnog is so good. And I had deprived myself of this for so long. It's because it's called eggnog.
So that's a great point. Yeah. And real quick, speaking of me being on long it's because it's called eggnog so that's a great point yeah and real
quick speaking of uh me being on trey's podcast brad you were on someone's podcast this past week
yeah it was man yeah it was fun we were with i was with cole clayborne um not clay colborne
at one point in the interview i started calling him clay he He's like, oh, dude, my name's Cole. Why do people always do that to me?
Cole Clayboard, great, awesome dude from Kentucky.
Yeah, he just interviewed me.
He interviewed you, I don't know, a month ago or so.
Yeah.
Really just down to earth dude.
Never met him before and then just Skyped interviewed him with him for like an hour and a half.
It was great.
Technology.
I was kind of like, I don't know how this is going to go.
It went great. Yeah. Um, I'll be honest. At one point I had to stop the interview and go, uh, get a computer charger, come back, crawl under my dining table to plug it in.
You know, so any kind of a pride that I had of like getting interviewed for a podcast was
completely shattered whenever I was under my table during a live Skype recording,
plugging in my computer charger.
That's actually a rule we've set up here at Ghostrunners.
We don't allow any guests on the show to be on all fours at any point in time.
You cannot be on all fours.
No, no, no, no.
You have to be homo sapien the whole time.
Right, right, right.
Stand straight up.
But yeah, Brad is a guest on Cole's podcast podcast in no hurry that comes out today yeah you're
listening to this on monday and so it's out a link is in our description to listen to that so go
check out brad yeah i mean it was your mom yeah and also humble salt is back oh baby it's humble
but we are not let me tell you right now it is the best salt you'll ever have in your life have
you been eating it a lot i I have been having it some.
I'll be honest.
I was out of town.
I'm not going to lie to people.
No, that's great.
I'm not going to act like I've had it every day.
Take it with me on the plane.
Be authentic, baby.
I didn't want it to get confiscated just in case.
Smart.
You know, same with my hair gel.
Like I'm like, oh, I don't know.
It's aerosol maybe.
And there are similar looks too.
If they, you know, one guy falls asleep at the job.
He thinks your hair gel is the humble salt.
That's right.
Similar canisters. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You can put humble salt on your lettuce, they say you know, one guy falls asleep at the job, he thinks your hair gel is the humble salt. That's right. Similar canisters. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Uh, you can put humble salt on your
lettuce. They say, Oh yes. On your salad. Not the devil's lettuce. Although it would probably make
that better too. I don't know. No, no, no. We're not, we're not advertising that. Okay. If you're
in Colorado, let us know, but we can't, you know, legally nationwide endorse this. Yeah. So humble
salt born in, uh, California, H ranch. Uh, the name humble
salt comes from Charles Spurgeon who said the genuine salt of humility cannot be used in excess.
So the same idea with the salt, like it's just, you can put it on anything as much as you want
and it just makes it so much better. It's seasoned salt. So it's got garlic and I don't even know
something that just makes it taste amazing. You can put on anything. Yeah. It's, it's not just salt. It's whatever, something, some kind of herbs and spices and
amazing stuff. Uh, put it on eggs, put it on your, uh, meat, put it on a chicken, which is also meat.
Your Christmas custard, maybe put it, put it in your Christmas custard. I think it would taste
good. Um, probably maybe, you know, salt brings out the flavor they say. That's true. Um, so, uh, yeah, humble salt, it is available, uh, from Dallas, Texas. You can order
it at www.humblesalt.co, um, and enter the promo code ghost runners, all one word at checkout to
get 10% off your order. Um, I totally recommend it, uh, because it's just so good. Like it,
it really can make something that's pretty normal, like eggs, which I know you don't love, but I love having eggs in the morning
and just really transform it. My mom immediately ordered it, uh, last week after she heard this
shout out to Georgianne. Um, and yeah, loving it. So, uh, just, just a great, great product. Uh,
check it out. Yeah. Several of you guys took advantage last week yeah bought some salt
and got 10 off so yeah cool to know that it's working so keep doing it you get 10 off link in
our description use code ghost runners for a little discount let's go thanks humble salt
for sponsoring our humble sode humble salt for the humble sode i like that so that's sweet
dude i'm so sick of shaving my face i I'm not even a hairy guy at all.
You're not.
I just, I'm tired of doing it.
Really?
I have to do it multiple times a week and I'm just so sick of it.
I know girls have it way worse.
Like they have to shave way more.
Not in the winter.
Well, they still shave their pits, don't they?
That's literally from Home Alone.
Is it true that French babes, uh, or they go, is it true that French babes don't shave
their pits?
They go, some do.
And he goes, well, they got new beaches. And they go, not true that french babes don't shave their pits they go some do and he goes well they got new beaches and they go not in the winter um i don't know maybe they do i think that's more
they don't go to the beach yeah yeah true i don't know if they're shaving their pits that's true
you don't see a lot of armpits in the winter time no actually i can't remember the last oh my gosh
i don't remember the last pit i saw I can't even remember the last armpit.
Oh, this is a weird feeling.
Oh, boy.
You were just in Mexico.
Surely you saw some pits.
Yeah.
Yeah, I probably did.
You probably weren't staring, though.
Yeah, just glancing.
You hate shaving.
Have you heard of that Seinfeld bit?
He says that cleavage is like the sun.
No.
Oh, he just compares it to like, you don't stare.
You just take a quick glance.
Just a quick glance and look away.
Okay, never mind then.
Seinfeld, man.
He's good.
He is good.
I thought about watching, like starting to watch it on Hulu.
Because you know, they have all the episodes on Hulu.
I just thought that two days ago.
Really?
I had the same thought to myself.
We should go on a journey together.
You've probably watched them all.
I think you're a pretty big fan. I't watched all of them okay i have probably watched
five percent of them okay like very i know plenty about it but i don't know it well and i feel like
i could really benefit from watching yeah let's start doing that okay let's casually start
watching seinfeld together sweet this is exciting yeah i am right cool friends look at each other's armpits maybe too if you're feeling
froggy we'll see i'm so lazy when i go home for christmas and stuff so basically all i did for
the last four days to just watch tv or watch movies yeah and sometimes you know the dog's
kind of laying on me and the remote's not nearby so my god i'll just watch whatever else is on but
anyway seinfeld came on and watched like three episodes straight i was like man like i like this
show but i forgot even how good the show is that i liked i was like i should watch
more of this yeah so that same thought just two days ago i thought that when i watched those
comedians in cars getting coffee thing jerry seinfeld was like he's just making funny things
out of nothing right now yeah and i was like that's what a show is and i need to watch that
like i need to get in that so it's the last good show with a laugh track
oh i don't know if i believe what i just said i disagree because friends and how i met your
mother i think friends is also good you don't think but i don't think it's as good as seinfeld
and how many mother was like well okay you said the last good show
oh oh i see what you're saying yeah whatever but i don't know that many i just i think laugh
tracks are so outdated and it's almost hard to watch a show with a laugh track nowadays
because it seems so dated that is funny i because i watched like three episodes of a netflix show
that had a laugh track the ranch terrible show don't watch it okay ashton kutcher and the guy
from that 70s show anyway uh ashton kutcher oh
yeah you're right uh the other guy uh hide okay that's how you show anyway uh yeah i didn't even
think about that uh ashton kutcher and that uh yeah um whatever toe for grace no um and it was
just yeah it was weird that they were laughing but i don't know sometimes i like no one went to laugh
there is an interesting thought too that like so one of the biggest vloggers on YouTube and
has been for the last couple of years, his name is David Dobrik. You probably haven't
mentioned him before. And he vlogs mainly from behind the camera. He's just very good at
facilitating fun and funny, uh, like bits and funny environments. And so most of the time you
don't even see David in a vlog. You just like hear him laughing. And so it's kind of this thought too, that like he is kind of providing the modern day
laugh track and crushing it on YouTube because of that. Cause people like knowing when to laugh.
Yeah. And he has such a good, like audible laugh that, you know, you hear him laugh way more than
you even see his face in his vlogs. And so there's kind of a psychology to that. Yeah. Cause every
once in a while, like you watch bloopers of people.
I know it's not the same thing,
but like,
it's funny to watch people realize that it's supposed to be funny or like,
like on SNL or something when people lose character a little bit,
which is not the same thing as a laugh track,
but like the same idea of like,
Hey,
this is the right time.
Like we're going to pause for a little bit for you to enjoy this before we
move on to the next thing.
Yeah.
I've started doing that with Trey's videos that I edit i'll throw in a blooper like a minute into it or
whatever like show is breaking one time that blooper reel that you guys did like it was like
five minutes long yeah i loved that yeah like maybe one of my favorite videos because it was
just like just genuine laugh over and over and over like you guys were just having fun so um i'll
tell you what's not funny with the laugh track is the big bang theory. I don't know how anyone thinks that show is funny.
It is crazy.
CBS just blanket blanket statement.
CBS is not funny.
Not since survivor last, last great comedy.
I haven't watched any of them, but I just know they're not funny.
Like because the commercial is because obviously you're watching CBS for NFL season.
Yeah.
See all these commercials for like the Cedric, the entertainer show with the guy from new
girl. And then this other one, I don't know all these commercials for like the Cedric the Entertainer show with the guy from New Girl
and then this other one.
I don't know.
All these like,
these look so mediocre.
I'm like,
if these are commercials
are the,
you know,
if these bits
on the commercials
are what you're thinking
are the funniest things
for each show.
The best of the best.
Like there's no way
I'm watching that.
Yeah.
There's one,
what's that one?
It's like two,
two girls.
That's not what it's called.
Oh yeah.
Two girls in a diner.
Yeah.
Whatever that one is.
I know what you're talking about. I watched part of that one time it was like this is so bad what is that show called
either way it's basically girls surely not two broke girls two broke girls yes two super sexy
girls i don't think that's it two girls i want their boots scooted what is it their boots
they're snoot booped two snoot boobsops in a kitchen is that what it's called
yes two broke girls so not funny yeah and they've been on for so long i didn't realize they were
still going maybe they're not that's fair maybe they're everyone when this episode is over go out
and youtube uh big bang theory without the laugh track someone went in and took it away and just
all these awkward pauses and then you really realize how unfunny it is
It's crazy. I've heard that Big Bang Theory is a show about smart people
This is gonna kind of be offensive
I guess show about smart people for dumb people and the rest of development is show about dumb people for smart
Oh, I like that a lot and totally agree. Yeah, cuz like Big Bang Theory is all these geniuses that
It's not very funny though. Anyway.
And Arrested Development is very clever.
Very well written.
Yeah.
Like amazingly well written.
Yeah, yeah.
Like they'll take the wife's name,
which is Lucille,
and then they'll use it
for one joke
in like season three.
Right.
You know,
when there's a loose seal.
Yeah.
You know,
and then they use that.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Whatever.
There's a lot of
very well written things in that show. so funny uh brad something we should address is these christmas
not christmas but um these christmas gifts i guess that we have these mugs here hey cheers
hey cheers bro cheers podcast yeah um we have these mugs in front of us that say world's best
co-ghost man because i Because. I feel it today.
Brad, take it away.
I'm joking.
Yeah.
Because our podcast fan account, Ghostrunners on Second, did a GoFundMe of sorts and helped, what was it, 40 people or something like that contributed money to this.
I think close to 50 different people.
Large group gift for us.
I think it was 16 different individual things that we got and we opened them up last week and it was so much fun
in so many ways. They had, everything was like super personal inside joke, um, things, you know,
we had socks that said, get on your feet. Uh, I've got gloves. Yeah. Gloves. I said,
give me five, your little poopsie, uh, weenie. Oh, I'm sorry. Your little weenie.
But we didn't get a poopsie as well. the poopsie i think how he's gonna play with
that sometime i got a head scratcher you got a head scratcher like which i've been keeping in
my car which is really fun yeah that's the way to do it don't even take it inside your home
every time i get in my car now i'm scratching and i can tell i'm starting to get conditioned
a little bit really i hopped it oh it was when i hopped in your car to drive you home after the airport i was like my head itches like oh gosh oh it's so
itchy i got dangerous so dry yeah uh they got us these mugs and a bunch of other cool stuff so
sometime i want you to have the head scratcher already placed on your head pull up to a stop
light and then just slowly turn to your left and look at the person and see what their reaction is.
Give them a thumbs up.
Kind of like that person from Signs.
Like, you know, in Signs, they have those like foil things.
Yeah, trying to reach the aliens.
Yeah.
Anyway, just amazing, amazing gift.
And we could not be more happy.
We made a video about it, an opening.
Yeah, we did a live stream while opening it. And it's cool to even see people's feedback who like didn't contribute or maybe didn't even know about it. But like, that was really fun watching you open all those gifts. Yeah, we did a live stream while opening it. And it's cool to even see people's feedback who didn't contribute or maybe didn't even know about it.
But they're like, that was really fun watching you open all those gifts.
Yeah, yeah.
We had a lot of fun.
Thank you, Ghostwriters on Second and everyone else who contributed.
Yeah.
That was really cool.
Absolutely.
Brad, do you want to play some voice memos off of your computer?
Yes.
For our ears to listen to and then respond to them?
Yes.
Cool.
Hey, Jake and Brad.
This is JC from Atlanta, currently in Oklahoma City, long time listener, second time voice memoir, and I have a challenge for you. My family today introduced me to a YouTube series
that's apparently pretty popular called Hot Ones, where they interview famous celebrities and they
make them try hot sauces. And one of the hotter hot sauces is actually a hot sauce
from Kansas City called Da Bomb. And so I thought it would be interesting if you and Brad tried
this hot sauce and gave us a review. If you need some reference for this show, you should watch
Hot Ones with Paul Rudd because he's from Kansas City and he's a total stud in this episode.
So I think it'd be pretty cool.
Hopefully you accept this challenge.
Thank you, JC.
I'm glad that you just discovered Hot Ones.
Apparently it's a big show.
Yeah, it's a pretty big deal on YouTube.
The Shaquille O'Neal one's the best.
I haven't watched that many of them admittedly, but I've seen that reaction Shaquille O'Neal has.
Something from Kansas. He's like, OK, it's their week in Kansas.
They don't have anything.
He takes it.
He goes, oh, yeah, it's a great show.
Personally, I don't get super excited about trying hot stuff.
Yeah, I'm definitely vetoing this.
I like hot stuff to an extent.
No way are we going to do that?
That's not fun to get like it's not fun to be on fire.
I've always said that. Yes. Yes. Ever since the Bunsen burner accident in eighth grade, I just have always said,
Hey, no more. No fire is not fun. Friends are fish are friends, not food. So yeah, we're not
going to do that, but it's a fun idea. That a great suggestion um maybe we could do we could do cold ones uh okay we just eat like different ice creams i had a frozen cappuccino from quick trip today
okay and got the worst brain freeze brain freezes suck i yeah it's very underrated how bad they hurt
i was driving by myself to church and i just go oh oh, like I said out loud, like it was,
it was so painful.
And I thought this is not going to end.
It'll make you grunt.
It came out of nowhere.
Brain freezes are really, really bad.
Really bad.
And I've, I had a friend growing up that did not get brain freezes.
Lucky.
Sam Dwyer.
Yeah.
Oh, you know, Sam Dwyer.
He was the catcher on the team.
Yes.
But he hopped over the fence.
Oh, he probably pushed the fence down. He's so strong. Um, didn't get brain freezes, but yeah,
brain freezes are awful. Have you heard what you're supposed to do? There's a couple different
things. What do you do? One time on Oprah, I was watching an episode and for some reason,
really remember this. She said to put the, your tongue on the roof of your mouth. Yes.
There's also something with your thumb, put your thumb on the roof of your mouth.
There's some kind of pressure up on the,
yeah, some, whatever you want to do,
like apply pressure to the top of your mouth.
I've heard, I've also heard this one,
which maybe it's just like a,
get your mind off of it.
Take your pants off.
Oh, take your belt,
wrap it around your neck.
And then you won't be thinking
about your head much longer.
Take your like finger and thumb on one hand
and like on your other hand in the middle.
This is, this is not going to work because people aren't watching us.
All right, so everyone out there, just do what I'm doing with my hands, okay?
Okay, so just take one hand like this.
So choose a hand.
I'm choosing my left.
And you're supposed to just rub right here.
Anyway, that's the end of the story.
But cold ones would actually maybe be just as painful.
Like if we just tried to chug just like a Slurpee.
Well, no, no, no.
They were just eating one chicken wing at a time.
So I think we just have several different bowls of custard and we just eat a spoonful at a time.
Maybe we, and maybe we do it outside.
Yeah.
So we are cold.
Yeah.
We're in shorts and a t-shirt.
Oh, I was just about to say I got a new coat for Christmas.
I could wear that.
You could.
It may be if you're, if you're struggling, you put the struggling you put the coat on okay yeah cold ones because we're not trying to
you know yeah but thanks jc that is a uh it's a good thought maybe we'll do it what up guys
it's your boy max walker here long time listener first time caller long time lover um i just had
a question about your holiday traditions and what irks you about them there i
said it for me i come from a big family it's christmas we have like 50 people there and every
one of them expects a hug when i walk in i'm just not about it like i love hugs but like
by the 30 37th hug you know what uncle janet i don't care I just don't feel the need to keep touching everyone
I'm 21 yeah I don't want to hug everyone
alright if you can answer that question
that would be great it just really irks me
one more question how did Brad
get into worship
pastor and into wood making
I find that interesting alright thanks guys
love you talk to you later
I like the
so claimed long
time lover doesn't want to hug
people. You can't introduce yourself
as a long time lover. Not a long time
lover. Not a physical touch guy. I will love
you from a distance all you want.
I love you short time. I love you
short time. I'm a short time lover. Love you from across
the room.
I love hugging people, first of all.
What if you had an uncle named janet you think
you'd still want to hug him or her oh boy no so i'm just picking apart this voice for some funny
uncle janet come on hey get over here boy uh no i do i have any pet peeves with my in-law or my
family probably but i don't know if that's a that's a dangerous road to go, do I have any pet peeves with my in-law or my family? Probably, but I don't know if that's a, that's a dangerous road to go down.
Do you have any answers?
I'm sure I could think of something.
Why don't you just tell them how you got into woodworking?
Sure.
So I planted a seed one day and 150 years later, I cut down a tree and I made some wood.
Wood working.
I worked the wood.
You work that wood. Wood twerking. That could be something. Oh, it's a different way of working.
It's an underground movement. Uh, I got some guys that I met in a chat room. I could,
it's got deep, it's got deep roots. Nice. Yeah. Um, so got into woodworking. Long story short
is that Catherine wanted a table, a coffee table. Whenever we got married, uh, we kind of looked a little bit on, you know, whatever, all the stores and they were all really expensive and really cheaply made.
And I had like, uh, 10 days that I was waiting to start my corporate job after we got married
and decided I wanted to do something cause I was so bored. And so I literally Google searched
manly hobbies and one
of them on there was woodworking. I watched like three videos on YouTube and I was like,
that looks so cool. I didn't know anything about it. Didn't have the slightest idea. Like I didn't
even know what a two by four was. Um, but just kind of bought a drill and a circular saw and
just made a coffee table for Catherine. And it was really, really cool at the end of the day to be like, I made that, like we're using this thing that I made. And so kind of got
the itch from there. So started selling stuff on the side and got busy ever since. So that's,
I never knew the story about you Googling manly hobbies. Yeah. I was so bored, man. I was just
like, gosh, I gotta do something. I also love the idea of you not knowing what a two by four is.
First of all, maybe think like, okay, so two, it's like buy one, not knowing what a two by four is like first of all maybe think like okay so two it's like buy one get one but two by four i buy two for the price of four
no it's like a double it's like when twins are on the ark like they came two by four you can go to
one by one and two by four okay well the website is 2x4 not two by four it just says 2x4 what does
that mean now it says on trucks sometimes it says 4x4 okay i've got a rental is that like two two
by fours or Or is that a,
yeah.
What?
I just didn't think I was going to be doing this much multiplication after
high school.
Two by four.
Yeah.
I had no idea how any of it worked.
Like probably been to home Depot twice in my life before that.
And just thought that like,
that was not how my brain worked.
And then all of a sudden,
not for me.
No,
seriously.
I had a friend,
we were programs partners together at K country. And it was like, do all the you do all that stuff i'll do like more of the
creative like writing and stuff that's not for me yeah i'm like that's just not how my brain works
dude and he's like i think you could figure this out if you tried so i'm here to tell you if you
want to do something just take some time and learn it especially on on YouTube. Uh, that's how I got into woodworking. It's a fun time. Yeah. That's a good answer. Thank you. Uh, Max Maxwell, Max. I, oh, it's
Max Walker. I remember that a very close, uh, name to my ex-girlfriend in college, Maxie Walker.
Oh, wow. Pretty much have the same name. Hey, shout out Maxie. Yeah. Shout out to the ex out
there. I actually don't know why I just said that and said her full name. Whatever, she's married now.
She got a different name.
That's weird.
Google it.
Thanks for the voice memo, dude.
Appreciate it.
Hey, Jake and Brad.
Kirstie from Cincinnati.
First time caller.
Don't know the podcast too well,
but I know you guys give some tips sometimes.
My husband, Steven, is turning the Dirty 30
on January 1st, New Year's Day, and I'm out of ideas
of what to get him. So if you guys could give me some tips on what you think he may like or
something we should do to celebrate, that would be awesome. Steven, if you're listening, happy
birthday and love you guys. Thanks. Bye. Okay. Happy birthday, man. First of all.
That's wild that your birthday is on january 1st i assume every
year it's on that day that's kind of crazy yeah i bet i bet it stays pretty consistent probably uh
i wonder if he won like if his parents won money for being like the first baby born at that
hospital you know that's a thing they give money to him yeah you get like a prize for being the
new year's baby i thought the prize was just like you get on the news at 2 a.m that too
i don't know that's the main prize that's the main thing just like you get on the news at 2 a.m. That too. I don't know. That's the main prize.
That's the main thing.
Just the publicity.
Alone, you're going to get advertisements and sponsors probably.
Yeah.
Well, congrats if you did that.
Yeah.
Gift wise, I'd say, I mean, for one, some Old Spice Swagger Sweat Defense deodorant is like, I mean, the perfect gift.
Of course.
You don't want to get too prideful in his old age. So sure you get some humble salt uh you know sprinkled in there yeah humble salt
to put on everything i don't know if he has a website uh but if he does there's a great uh
digital resource marketing uh place that he could look at nice dude right i would say um i'm not
sure how his sleep is but you get him a nice stocking cap.
If he's having trouble sleeping or if his head gets a little cold, a stocking cap is a good gift.
My sister came up to me this week and was like, hey, FYI, I just heard about how you sleep in a stocking cap.
That's weird.
Has anyone told you it's not weird?
No.
But I have not had that many people tell me it's weird either so maybe
it's just i think if a single person also slept in a stocking cap they would have told you by now
after last week oh my mom wanted people to know that it's like it's not like a stocking cap it's
like a a knit hat is what she she's like i think people are getting the wrong idea about you. It's like a Kevin McAllister beanie. Anyway, my thought is this.
Gifts are great, but experiences are better. Okay.
Ooh. Spoken like a true millennial.
So you get him, and he is a millennial.
Would you rather have $50 today or $5,000?
The guy has an algorithm to figure out the score of any college basketball game.
Yeah. I think you give him choices like that. You give him options of gifts he can have. So
it's like, I can give you $50 now or this experience that Brad's about to tell you about.
Yeah. So I think you go with the dirty 30 idea, kind of what we did. But you play on words,
kind of like we did the first time where we say. You have him go run a tough mutter because he's
going to get so dirty. Yeah. You run a tough mutter because it's gonna get so dirty yeah you run a tough mutter together yeah you're like do you want a d or a b
the d is a dirty 30 and that's when you run the tough mutter or the b is a birdie b-e-r-t-y 30
and that's when you watch four to five hours of sesame street together or nerdy marathon yes
exactly uh that's a good experience for my friend where's my friend uh yeah great great time um
or then maybe you start uh let's what's another one you could do uh like giving them options i
think you could choose like uh fire or ice oh sure the ice option is you sit outside and do an episode of cold ones with each other uh fire yeah is you come to kansas
city and hang out with brad and i and then you try the bomb hot sauce yeah and we watch and you
can sit in my living room and we can have a fireplace the fireplace going oh all sorts of
fire oh yeah oh yeah yeah so you're like warm in your mouth and on the rest
of your body and in your soul. Yeah. Um, fire and ice. I like that. Yeah. Experiences are great.
Um, have you and Catherine had any like cool experiences? Like not necessarily on birthdays,
but like opened up to each other a few times. It was really great. Um, we're really like
moving in the right direction. I think like things are looking up, you know, like one time,
like we were really vulnerable with each other. Like, Hey, FYI, like, I don't like the name lovey. I think we should go
with honey instead. Uh, uh, cool experiences. Uh, my wife and I have had some really cool
experiences just last week. She opened up to me about, uh, some health issues. She was having,
so it was really cool. It was really fun for us. I'm sure we have, I can't think of them off the
top of my head right now um
i'll tell you a cool experience you guys had while isaac and i were having another cool experience
was you guys had to go to the doctor while we went into our skydiving yeah priorities right
do we do we tell everyone why we were in the doctor i know it was for the baby yeah but even
more than that it was for a sonogram. Sonogram could tell, is that right?
Yeah. Sonogram could tell what gender it is. The gender it was, was a
sonogram lady. This might be a little too inappropriate. We could, we could edit it out.
Maybe we'll edit it out no matter what, because that's funnier. But the sonogram lady was like,
you see that right there? That's a and i just stood up and i was you high five and everybody yeah baby you
want to see another one right here god was like brad brad brad i was running down the halls like
boom boom they said it was a we did it oh yeah i finally got my quarterback. So excited.
I got some testes.
He's going to be my besties.
You hear that?
Let's go.
They're like, that's a third leg.
No, oh my gosh.
It's a boy.
Oh my gosh.
Congratulations, you guys.
Yeah.
So baby boy's got a good heartbeat.
Baby boy is looking real healthy.
That's seriously how they talk, dude.
But it's a boy.
And now everyone knows it. So we're really excited.
Hattie,
who knows what she thinks of it these days.
She's so stubborn.
She's like,
I'm going to have a baby boy sister.
It's like,
Nope,
that that's,
that's uncle Janet.
That doesn't make any sense.
How do you got to choose one or the other?
Good.
Janet.
Yeah.
No,
we're not going to call him before you guys found out the sex.
She kept saying it was Mr. like
Shanom or something. Something like an Arabic name.
That was like a, that was like a one week thing. She, she was calling it Jonathan.
Oh yeah. We also had a Jonathan there.
Like every time I was like, okay, we should pray for the baby. What's the baby? Like,
what should we call the baby? You know? And, uh, baby Jonathan. And I don't know why, like
baby Jonathan. Okay. Um, but yeah, it's pretty exciting times. So really, really excited for that,
uh, development. So may coming up. Whoa. Yeah. Five months before, you know, it, man. Yeah.
It's a little five months after Steven's birthday. That's how I'll remember it.
That's exactly right. Like, okay. Now Steve was January 1st. He's one, one early this year. He
was one, one. So, so anyway, Steve, that's what you could get for your birthday is just.
The miracle of childbirth.
Yeah.
Fun gift.
I guess that's a cool experience you and Catherine went through together.
Very cool experience.
It's like, yeah.
You know.
Experience of life.
Parenting a child together.
Yeah.
Sometimes cool.
Sometimes not so cool.
I'll tell you that.
But overall, really fun time.
Okay.
Well, Brad, we've
got like five more minutes until you have to go and celebrate Christmas Eve. Uh, cause why
wouldn't you? It's December 29th. Of course you have to go to celebrate Christmas Eve.
Uh, but let's do a quick review of the week and then end it with a jingle and then we'll be done.
Okay. Can I say one thing before? Yeah, man, I guess it's, it's not that pressing of a thing,
but, uh, this past weekend before, like not yesterday,
but the weekend before, we had a 10-year reunion for my class in high school.
Oh, cool.
Didn't go to it.
Oh, why not?
It ended up being like the 10-year reunion for class of 09, which is my class, and also
08 and 07.
Oh.
And there was like 250 people that were going on Facebook.
And I was like, 250 people, maybe 100 of those people are going to be from my class.
Don't really want to do this. Gotcha. Uh, and then people like, but there was this Facebook
group for it and they were like, let's do the 10 year challenge on here. You know, like the,
show your picture 10 years ago and 10 or now. Sure. And it was amazing. And I guess this is
a thing these days, but like how many girls
talked so highly about their current state of eyebrows. They're like, they're like, oh yeah,
pretty much look the same, but really upped my eyebrow game. And I did not know that was a thing.
This is how I was with lips. Yeah. Maybe it's the same idea. People are looking at this.
Like, yeah, exactly. Yeah. exactly yeah like oh i was so embarrassed
about my eyebrows back then like i didn't even know you had them i have never looked at a girl's
eyebrows never never once unless it's like a unibrow like this is just like if it's a small
caterpillar on your face then i will notice but as long as it's somewhat like yeah i'm looking at
yours right now i have no opinion they're great yeah fine good job thank you yeah um, and then I looked at the pictures that they showed though, and it was like,
wow, your eyebrows look so different.
They really did.
Good job, Denise.
I'm so proud of you.
So, but like probably four different girls said something about their eyebrows.
Really?
Yeah.
So if you're out there and you don't know, you know, or if you are a big eyebrow person,
let us know.
We would love to know how big of an eyebrow person you are. speaking of letting us know about uh your eyebrows on a five-star review
let's do review of the week review of the week okay so we're on podcast.apple.com right now
yes also accessible through the podcast app yes podcast.gov app yes um we'll take you there as
well uh so my review of the week well i gotta give it to two one because it's super short
uh it just says this podcast is god's magic that's really funny and uh the other one
uh i will choose the title says i could give a ted talk on why you should listen to this podcast
if you were embarrassed by laughing out loud in public or answering questions out loud that no
one else can hear avoid this podcast no one tells you how tricky creating quality relationships with new people can be as an adult somehow these guys have made a bunch of strangers feel like Let's go.
That's a really good review.
People offer to buy us lunch a lot, and I think let's go that's a really good review people offer to
buy us lunch a lot and i think it's because they know that our combined total is going to be like
16 you know like hey lunch is on me you know sometimes it's like i don't know man this guy's
gonna pick an expensive plate they know that we're going how much could it possibly cost
to buy jake and brad lunch they don't have very good taste in food so it's going to be pretty
we're going to mcdonald's all right sounds good um that's great i i always feel bad just picking one because i really do genuinely love all of them but um
we did get a or sorry are you still looking i have one okay um is it the four-star review we
got this week it is because i think that was an accident don't you love how we assume that like
four-star reviews are accidents like surely they didn't mean to do that. I think so too, which is the one I was going to read.
It's a four-star review, so maybe they don't deserve to be read,
but maybe it's your review and you can fix it.
It's LDSShark626.
Enjoyable, says the title.
I enjoy listening to Jake and Brad.
They are very straight to the point.
That's us.
Their conversation is funny and often reminds me of conversations I have with
my own friends.
Sometimes they talk about,
sometimes things,
boy.
Oh,
sorry.
Some things they talk about,
make me pause and think,
huh?
I never thought about that.
That makes sense.
I sometimes wish I could put my two cents actually put in.
Gosh,
you two do a great job.
I love the dynamic between you guys. That the end nice yeah sorry i was kind of like one of my contacts is off and i'm kind of reading around
this microphone thing so that's my excuses um but yeah thank you for the four star review uh
really genuinely though i can't stress enough at least for me i don't want to speak for jake but i
we love every single one of these reviews so So they're awesome. Yeah. They've never not been
awesome. It's so true. They continue to be great. Yeah. I check and look for them all the time. So
thank you for sending those in. Yeah. We appreciate it. Sorry. It's a shorter episode,
but, uh, we'll be back next week. Uh, I will be feeling better. I'm sure. And have a little more
energy and, uh, can take breaths out of my nose, which will be fun.
Oh, yeah.
Maybe in the new studio.
Yeah.
So maybe we should do a quick remembrance of this one.
We've had a lot of fun here.
I will remember you.
Ghost of Runners.
Will you remember me? Helliscustomcreations.com. Yeah, you got it.
It's hard with a cold.
With a cold.
I was trying to do it really light.
Yeah, it was beautiful.
That's a hard song without a cold, I think.
Do you want me to do a jingle?
Yes. of cold i think um do you want me to do a jingle uh yes brad why don't you um sign us off here episode 34 with the jingle and potentially sign us off uh oh no sorry not for the uh not for
jeremiah uh oh yeah please no sign to the left what is that called it's not esl esl is english
as a second language what is it dsl no that's type of internet that's modem yeah yeah what is it you know what i'm talking about oh asl american sign
language sure sure um no no sign language needed just uh you know wrap us up here not only for
this episode but for our time here in the garage in the workspace because hopefully next week i'll
be moved in yeah and we'll have a new podcast studio. Finish strong, baby.
Dum-dum-dum-dum.
The Ghost Runners pod.
Dum-dum-dum-dum.
The Ghost Runners pod.
Ah.
Dum-dum-dum-dum.
How's it go?
With the Ghost Runners!
Chicken Brad.
Chicken Brad.
We come out every Monday.
And we always have to say oh we love
that you listen oh we love that you listen oh we love that you listen oh we love that you listen
i'm sorry that was great uh you know in honor of little Jonathan, you did some little John.
Really appreciate that.
Now let me see you get ghost. Ghost runners, ghost runners.
That's it. I'm sorry.
No, don't apologize. That was a great jingle.
Thank you guys for listening.
As always, tell your friends
about our podcast if you want.
No pressure, but do keep in mind
we are the sexiest podcast in kansas no doubt
use that as marketing material uh as need be and there's a lot of them out there in kansas that are
hot yes yeah it's kansas not missouri so there's a lot of sexy woods out there a lot of lookers out
there so uh follow us on instagram if you want that's where all the video clips go uh ghost
runners podcast on instagram.com yep and uh you can interact and talk to us there more if you want that's where all the video clips go uh ghostrunnerspodcast on instagram.com yep and uh you can interact and talk to us there more if you want see you guys next week have a
great week have a great one good job i will remember you
will you remember me
don't let your life Will you remember me?
Don't let your life pass you by And weep not for the memories
Don't let your life pass you by, and weep not for the memories.
Don't let your life pass you by, and weep not for the memories.