Ghostrunners - 42 - Zaniest Episode Yet
Episode Date: February 24, 2020Jake gives online dating tips, Brad gets himself into a really strange situation, and they're both on the lookout for Alanna. Follow us on Instagram: http://bit.ly/33WAq4PÂ Leave us a voice memo and ...ask a question: https://anchor.fm/jake-triplett/message Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Transcript
Discussion (0)
Have you noticed, I think old men all kind of smell the same.
Okay.
There was like a guy at Chipotle this week, older man, and I didn't even like turn around.
I didn't even need to look at him.
And I was like, he's old.
Like that guy, that guy's got shaving cream and brute all over him.
Yes.
He is carrying like a hanky in his back jeans pocket.
I guarantee it.
And it's definitely jeans.
Like he's just by his smell.
Yeah.
And then it reminded me, cause I was like, wow, there's like a distinct old man smell.
And I was like, oh, I just quoted The Office in my head.
From like Creed talking about like, oh, I know exactly what he's talking about.
Sprout mung beans in my desk.
Yeah.
Ryan Howard complains of a distinct old man smell.
One of my favorite Office episodes, Conflict Resolution.
But yeah, what is that?
Why do they all smell the same?
They're just that generation, man.
You know, the old spice is just flowing the uh
the aftershave like do you use aftershave i don't so that's probably what it is i think it is it's
aftershave and ptsd yes when you combine them they have a certain smell Every morning we're taking back Ghost Runners Podcast.
Ghost Runners Podcast.
Welcome back everyone to Ghost Runners, the sexiest podcast in Kansas.
Hello.
It's us. Episode 42, Jackie Robinson episode.
Yep.
And also Bill Clinton. Oh,, I so bad at that answer. I could,
I couldn't tell you. I think GW was 43. Okay. I know that GW was one.
You think air force one? No. What are you saying? George Washington? Yes. Okay. Different George.
Yeah. I double, I doubled down on the joke.
I have no idea. Well, yeah, if he was 43, then Bill Clinton's 42.
That's how that would work. Okay. Well, if you guys know, leave us a five-star review about presidents. It's a chilly Friday morning here in our basement. It's about 20 degrees
outside. Didn't think that moving inside into a basement would end up being colder than a garage wood
shop.
But here we are, freezing our tails off.
Yeah, it's a pretty cold day.
But yeah, it's been a good week.
Brad, how's your week been?
How are things going?
Great.
Still pretty slow business-wise, but that's okay.
I'm trying to just be okay with that.
I had a big, the warehouse sale was this week.
That was my, that was my thing this week. Um, so that was my big thing. I was really excited about
the, uh, there's every year in Kansas city, they have this huge Nike warehouse sale and they just
sell all these like rejected shirts and like things that were like misprinted or printed too
much of or something. And I live for it, baby. You guys have probably noticed it. If you follow
us on Instagram, Ghost Runners podcast,
oftentimes Brad is wearing like a nice Under Armour or Nike sweatshirt or pullover from
some random college. And people will always comment either in person or on Instagram.
I was wearing Hope College the other day and no way, Hope College.
People see Brad and I'm like, South Dakota State, go Acorns. Like, oh, I just,
I picked this up at this warehouse. Yeah, I'm wearing the
hat that I bought the other day. Memphis Grizzlies, or Memphis Tigers. Yeah. Go Memphis. So. You got
plenty of Nike gear for colleges you didn't attend. Absolutely. Which was like such a thing
at CannaCook. You remember that? Like, like it was like such a thing to like have random colleges
and like swap with people. Yeah, I would trade. Yeah. I found out one, this other counselor,
this is when I worked for the Springfield Cardinals back in the day he was from montgomery alabama and was a huge
montgomery biscuits fan and so he traded double a baseball minor league gear oh yeah which is kind
of funny yeah i bought some uh main red claws they're like uh like a g league for the nba
a white claw but for the new englanders exactly. It's a little bit more of a kick
to it. It's got, it's the, it's the breakfast version.
So it's like a bloody Mary meets a white claw.
It's a red claw. Red claw. Yeah.
No, but like, since I have so many
friends from all over the country because of
camp, it's like so fun for me because I go and I
just send, I literally sent
170 pictures yet, you know, in
the last two days of like, what about this shirt? What about
this shirt? Anybody want this university of Tennessee thing? Anybody want this Oklahoma state thing?
And like, they were loving it. It was so much fun. That's awesome. And you were loving it.
That's a lot of pictures to send. It was a lot of megabytes. I told him, I, yeah, I told him,
I was like, this is the closest I'll ever feel to Adam Schefter. Like always on your phone,
like just, just making deals left and right. You know, one word answers the whole time.
It was fun. Deal. Got it.
Got it.
Sold.
Copped.
I would always say copped.
Except so cool like that.
That's like a thrifty word.
Yeah.
Who's trying to cop?
You know, Jordan 11s, whatever.
That's what people say.
Yep.
We know.
We're cool.
That's cool.
You had a good week, Brad.
Yeah.
What about you, man?
It's been a pretty good week.
I'm trying to think now about it.
It's actually been one of those
weeks where I'm like, wow, I, there, there doesn't seem to be enough hours in the day
for the things I want to do, which is good. I guess it's been busy, but like, um, yesterday
I spent, I think I was with a client, so I was in his car, but we drove like 300 miles yesterday
with him. I was in the car for like five hours yesterday, um, doing different stuff, driving
from the different places we're doing this video shoot. And then I spent two hours and 45 minutes
yesterday on the phone. You know, then we had like an hour basketball game, like all these
different things. This is like just yesterday, but like none of those things are editing videos,
which is the main thing I need to be doing. And so just like, you know, so last night I went to
bed at three 30, woke up at eight this morning and just like started working again. So yeah, yeah, I want to get so much stuff done before a tour starts so I don't have to worry about other stuff.
Just focus on comedy and touring stuff.
Can I take it back to the 300 miles driving yesterday?
Yes.
I have some questions about that.
So first of all, you did this with the company that you've worked with before.
Yeah, former client.
They reached out and wanted another video done.
So the guy you were driving with, did you know him very well
beforehand? I had not met him before. Okay. Okay. So that's, that's where I want to go with this.
That's the questions I want to ask you, because I think there's definitely some different personality
types there. Like there's some people that are like, Oh my gosh, I live for these kinds of
situations. I would love to just go with a random stranger and drive around and talk to them for
five hours. Yeah. Other people are like, that is my nightmare. Like I would never want to do that. How, tell me about
your feelings about it and tell me about what you, how you interacted with this guy. Was it like
consistent conversation? Did you feel like you guys had to be talking? Was it like, Oh, after a
while we just kind of got used to each other and I'm just on my phone and we're just driving, you
know, tell me about it. Yeah. Those are all good questions. I didn't even think we'd even talk about this. So I should have been thinking more about how it went, but
yeah, it was, I guess I didn't have any like anxiousness going into it. Wait, is anxiousness
the word I should probably say anxiety. Yeah. Anxiousness. That doesn't feel right. I didn't
have any anxiety going into it. Cause it's like, yeah, this will be fun. This is a new, new friend.
Yeah. A lot of time spent. I feel like I can get along with anyone, but there's definitely a point
where, yeah, it just feels so, and this is, i don't know if this is selfish or what but it's
so unproductive like just sitting here and talking to someone for this long of like i've got my
computer in my backpack there's things i could be doing on that yeah whenever you said uh none of
these things are editing videos i thought to myself you could be editing videos in the car
if you really yeah yeah that'd be tough but And there's almost always things I could be doing even on my phone nowadays
that could be considered work stuff.
So we had a good balance, I would say.
We were comfortable enough to like,
we'd go 10 minutes of silence, you know, just chilling.
And then he'd say,
I'm trying to think of an example of something
he actually said yesterday.
I'm just like, silos are old looking.
That's, yeah, those do look old. And then we would talk
about silos for five minutes. It was like a really casual podcast. No, he was fun.
Well, they call them psi highs. They're pretty tall. No, they're silos though.
Oh, this is good. Let me write this down. He was-
Going on tour later. So this is gold.
No, he was a really nice guy he's a former like college baseball player
we talked a lot about sports he also grew up on a farm in north dakota okay i told him that one
time i'd been to fargo and got on the news and then celebrated at texas roadhouse he said that's
the weirdest thing i've ever heard anyone say they did in fargo and uh yeah i talked about his farm
against my grandpa's farm oh you kind of kind of had a battle of the farm.
None of this is exciting stuff. I don't know. Barn battle.
Yeah. We had a barn battle. I'm just curious. Yeah. I'm more curious,
like just the whole dynamic of the idea of like a complete stranger in a car for a long time. Like
I just think it's interesting. Like I think some people out there listening are probably like,
oh, that sounds fun. I would love to do that. Maybe not for five hours, maybe three hours is
more of like a common time limit on that. Other people I think would be like, no, I'd rather drive
myself behind him. You know, like I'd rather, I'd rather be, you know, carpooling with him
than, or caravanning with him. I mean. Yeah, it definitely would have preferred probably. I mean,
I like talking to people and yesterday was nice, but yeah, at least if I'm in my own car,
I can either listen to what I want to listen to, or I can just like talk on the phone. Right. And then I wouldn't have to have those two and a half
hours of phone calls afterwards. I could have done that during all that driving.
I feel like I'm more exhausted sometimes driving with somebody else than by myself because
it can be. Yeah. Yeah. It's for whatever reason, it just is more emotionally draining.
Oh, and I got stuffy. You know how I get when I get stuffy.
Oh yeah. See, that's the thing like like oh i'm hot
but do i say anything because it's this guy's car yeah and like does he notice that i'm on the right
side of the car where the sun is like i have the sun on me dude we're not gonna be the same
temperature rolling up my sleeves right now with my pants like you know what my move is actually
is to like you know when it's really cold outside the window is pretty cold so like roll up my
sleeve and then like put my entire forearm on the window and it kind of cools you down. The fact that you have like a pro move for this shows that
it's like a thing that really happens to you. Yeah. It's like, that's my move if I'm too nervous
to say anything. But one time I rolled up my sleeves and he said, oh, you get hot? And I said,
yeah. Not even like a little bit. Oh yeah. Been hot for a while. Quite a bit. Didn't know you had a fireplace in this car.
That's funny.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Like you just like stick your head out the window.
Like, oh, just a little warm.
Just need some air.
Yeah.
Oh, that's nice.
That's like the rule.
That's the responsibility of the driver though, to be like, hey, FYI, like it's your climate.
Like do whatever you want with it.
You know?
Yeah.
Recycle if you want. I don't care. It's your climate, like do whatever you want with it. You know? Yeah. Recycle if you want,
I don't care. It's your, your, your atmosphere, your climate. No, but he was, uh, that's funny.
He was, he was a nice guy and he did a really good job too. Cause like what this company was
wanting was like a day in the life of one of their employees. And so it was more fun than a typical,
just like freelance video. Cause it was kind of like we were vlogging in a sense of like,
it wasn't that corporate. It was kind of like me giving him these prompts like all right as we're walking in um i'll be on you and
why don't you say like this isn't this like this is our first kind of you know yeah so getting to
like coach him and him being like really like honestly pretty good for like kind of a you know
salt of the earth kind of yeah you know bro or whatever he was like really good at like being
on camera so it was fun cool good times good times on camera. So it was fun. Cool. Good times.
Good times brought out. So yeah, it's been a very busy week doing all sorts of stuff.
Went to an open mic night again. Oh, you did? Wednesday? Yeah. Is that your strategy or is
that just when they are? Oh, because I know that you're busy on Wednesdays. No, that's just when
they are. I went to two different places two weeks in a row and they both happen to be on Wednesdays.
Oh man. Next Wednesday, I'm going to, I'm going to call
Gunnar and be like, Hey, we're canceling Bible study this week. We're going to open mic night
instead. Hey, small groups. We're all doing it. I always loved, I heard about like different people
doing fantasy football. Um, what's it called? Oh, like consequence for the loser. Yes. That's
my favorite consequence. I have always wanted to do it and I've never been a part of one,
but the consequence is that the person becomes a dead last of fantasy football has
to perform it at open mic night, but they don't even get to say what they want to.
The jokes they say are written by the people who didn't come in last in their group.
And I just think that would be so funny to get to set your, your friend for failure like
that.
Right.
And I've heard that like whenever I've heard the consequence, you put all the jokes like
on a like folded up piece of
paper and they have them in their pocket he doesn't even get to see it so they just get up
there and they just look at them and then they have to say whatever's on the piece of paper
instead of like a full-out joke just give them like one topic and dot dot dot you know just uh
construction cranes isis yeah yeah huh huh what are we what are we doing there
oh yeah i think that'd be so funny or just
completely set them up for a joke that doesn't make any sense or just or just like i should not
be saying this in public you know which sounds like open mic nights are that's fine they prefer
that the r word is r word that's right that was one from last week just fyi that's not something
we normally say here it's from open mic night last week but more to come on that uh little sneak preview for this episode we're taking it back old school we
got well we always do voice memos but we're we're doing blanks of the week yeah baby and maybe even
currently trending i don't know who knows who knows but that's that's to come and i'll talk
about open mic night when it comes time for some poultry okay okay fair enough yeah a little sneak
preave but yeah it's um what are we talking about? Oh, just our weeks, I think. Yeah. Old men smell
and I've been really busy. Those are the two things. Those are kind of the two big things.
Another thing that I noticed this week, which was kind of happening as we were recording last week,
should have talked about it more then, but Valentine's day, big day for couples on social
media. Okay. Here's something I saw a lot. Maybe
you saw too. It's never bothered me until this year, which also, sorry, I'm getting, I'm going
everywhere. That point you made either one or two episodes ago about how, when you get older,
you become more like opinionated maybe because you don't have as much confidence in yourself.
Cause you have insecurities. Yeah. Yeah. That's like stuck with me a little bit. I'm like,
am I kind of that way because of what Brad said? Or is it kind of because I need to do this for a
living or, you know, and that's easy. I don't know. Still working it out. But this is an example of
that because it's never annoyed me before. But the phrase partner in crime, I saw that probably
like 10 to 15 different times on Instagram. And it just got me. I was thinking like, are they,
you guys committing a lot of crimes. You guys are
rebels, a real Bonnie and Clyde, you guys. I was thinking like the closest thing to a crime
you guys have committed is like both doing face masks and not Instagram it. Because that seems
illegal. It seems like you have to post that. Don't do that. But every married couple probably
has done it. I think if you are, like if you're, especially if you're a girl in your twenties and
you put on a face mask, you have to put it on Instagram or it doesn't work. I think.
Yeah. It doesn't exfoliate the same way. No, it's different. So I think I'm like,
maybe that's what they mean by partners in crime. I'm absolutely a partner in crime with my wife
every week. And I'll tell you why. Okay. Because every single week we're running late
because of her. Let's just say it. Your crime is tardiness. No, my crime is speeding.
Those cops, if they see me, they're going to say, that's illegal.
You can't do that.
You say, sorry, it's my partner in crime.
Sorry, partner in crime.
And then I do two gunshots in the air and drive away.
Pop, pop.
A car pop.
A desk pop.
Yeah.
Okay, that's funny.
Actually, I don't think it was on Valentine's Day, but maybe the day after.
I was like, oh, it'd be fun to just watch a movie in bed.
Let's watch a movie.
And the other guys just come back onto Netflix. Okay. And so I was like, oh, it'd be fun to just watch a movie in bed. Let's watch a movie. And the other guys just come back onto Netflix. And so I was like,
oh, have you ever seen this movie? And she's like, no. Is it kind of stupid humor? And I was like,
no, I think it's, I mean, it's Will Ferrell, but it's not like as Anchorman Will Ferrell or anything. She's like, okay, we can watch it. We watched it and I was laughing so hard, but then
I kind of felt back. So like,
it is pretty stupid.
Right.
Still like,
there's just things in there that are like,
Oh,
this is just juvenile humor.
That's funny to me.
But,
but I,
I almost,
it was like kind of like watching a movie with your mom.
Like,
like,
Oh,
I forgot about that.
Like,
no,
there's like no sexual parts at all.
Like it's,
it's totally clean.
And then it's like,
Oh my God.
I think we,
I think I first saw this in church.
Like it's so clean. I think I saw it in church. You watched this with youth it's like, oh my gosh. I think I first saw this in church. Like it's so clean.
Yeah, yeah.
I think I saw it in church.
You watched it with youth group?
You watched this with youth group?
Like, yeah.
So I just watched it.
I almost felt bad like a few times.
I was like, oh man, this is a lot sillier than I thought it would be.
It hits both sides of the spectrum.
Like I haven't seen that movie in a while, but I remember there was one dumb part where
they just Dwayne the Rock Johnson and Samuelson and samuel jackson they just jump off the
building that's so dumb and that's never even been funny to me like this is so stupid that the first
time i watched it i was like what and katherine did the same thing she's like wait what they died
so maybe that's what they wanted out of the movie but there's also more intelligent parts like i
think it's such a funny joke that will ferrell doesn't think eva mendez is attractive and like
has this crazy magnetism to like these beautiful women just has no idea i think that's a funny joke that will ferrell doesn't think eva mendez is attractive and like has this crazy
magnetism to like these beautiful women just has no idea i think that's a funny joke but then there's
other times within that joke that are just like these that's that's too far of a thing that you
don't need to say yeah she calls them things and i'm like that's weird honey you're dressed like a
hobo yeah yeah i'm sorry i just you know i've had a busy day i'm so sorry you have to see him
you know yeah anyway but yeah the other guy's good movie it's pretty underrated movie oh roommate
greg was watching it just last night when i got home it's a good one yeah anyway partners in crime
sorry for veering us oh no that's okay that's all i really had to say just i noticed it way more
this year i'm like this has always been a thing but for some reason this year i'm like this is
crazy right well like people love the idea of like
their marriage being like so zany and wacky.
Oh, they do.
Like, oh, we are just so wacky.
You know, we're partners in crime.
You know, oh, we did this crazy thing
where we went on this fun little road trip together
that we didn't plan.
We're so spontaneous and wacky.
Like, okay, we didn't plan it until a week out yeah but
the airbnb was like almost booked it's a way to book it like so fast and i was texting him i was
like which one you want to book and he wasn't texting me so i just booked one i just chose one
we were downtown denver and we didn't know where we were going and all of a sudden we were on the
wrong way on a one-way street oh that's just my partner crying for you my partner one time we did
not realize that we got bottomless mimosas but but we had to take advantage of it. And it was the craziest game of Scrabble we've ever played.
The words he was saying.
Oh, my gosh.
Did not know you could do a double letter triple points.
That's my partner in crime.
That's my PIC.
My PIC.
Anyway, what was I going to say?
Game plot there is so wacky.
I love that Bruce Almighty.
It's such a subtle joke, but let's get back to wacky Bruce. That's funny. Did you remember what you were going to say?
Yeah, it was not related to that at all, but I have something else to talk about.
I have something somewhat related. Okay, good. Yeah.
Brad, I doubt you do a lot of online dating. Never have I.
That's probably good from when I know that you got married that that's good yeah
but I I'm not doing it now I've done it before obviously most people have seen the tinder stuff
I've done that you know blew up and whatnot but it's crazy when people you're saying like married
couples think they're so zany I'm sure guys do it too I don't see a lot of guys profiles but it's
crazy what's out there like how many girls have the exact same answers?
So these online dating profiles, they want you to kind of show your personality now,
which I think is interesting because if I had a personality, I wouldn't be using the internet to
meet women. But the, um, Hey, there's no stigma anymore. Okay. There's no stigma. That's what
people say when there's stigma. What? no it's okay the yeah they have all
these prompts for you and i think yeah like i said guys are probably doing it too but i don't
think girls realize how similar their answers are so there's one prompt that's like where to find me
at the party 80 of the answers are wherever the dog is it's crazy uh one thing that can win me
over tacos oh you like Oh, you like tacos?
Oh, you like tacos and music?
You like hamburger and or chicken with bread around it?
Whoa.
The, oh yeah, the answers are just crazy.
It's like one thing that I'm not willing to live without, music.
Oh my gosh.
Oh yes.
This is jumping off the page to me right now. I would just like to be in a five
hour car ride with no music, just completely silent. Wow. That is such a unique personality
trait that you like music. That's awesome. No, I know exactly. Well, like crazy. So you sent on a,
your Instagram story, maybe we talked about this last week, uh, or Trey's Instagram story that,
uh, that website with that guy, that's like, I'll give you $25,000 if you can find me a girlfriend.
Date Jeff G.
Date Jeff G.com?
What did you say?
Date Jeff G.com.
Fun to some YouTubes.
But his, I remember I looked at his website or whatever, and it was like classic, like
what you're, maybe what you're talking about, where he basically just described every human.
He's like, you know, I'm pretty adventurous some days, love, love going on a hike, but also I'm okay. Just sitting around talking to people every once
in a while around a fire. And it's like, really? Like that's literally everybody. Like some days
I have energy other days I'm tired. I'll sleep in this guy. I'm dating him. Okay. I'm dating Jeff
G. Yeah. It just alarms me how much people are not willing to like
take a chance and jumping off the page. Cause you don't want to be like, I think maybe it's
human nature to be like, Oh, I want to be kind of like open to everyone. But when it comes to
dating, I think it's okay to get specific from the get-go because there's only certain people
that are going to be attracted to you or attracted to you anyway. Like I train geckos in my basement.
Okay. I'm a gecko guy. Then now I'm super into it. Yeah. But if
I'm not a gecko guy, then I'm more out of that. Oh, or you're like, Oh, this girl's zany. She
likes tacos. I'll meet with her. And then it's like, yeah, uh, I'm glad that you liked my dinner.
Uh, I just need to run down the basement real fast to grab something. It's kind of a creepy
place. He's like, Oh, well, if it's creepy, let me go down there with you. If you're a little bit
scared. Oh no, no, no, no. What are all these geckos doing back here? Now that's zany. Yeah. Whoa. I thought you were zany with the tacos.
When you put the cilantro on there, I was like this girl crazy.
I can really see her being my partner in crime. But she's like geckos? No. That was not cilantro.
It's gecko tails. They grow back. Yeah. They grow back. They're very crunchy, aren't they?
Oh man. Yeah. So I, I guess if you're out there, guy or girl online dating, like take some chances with
your profile. It doesn't have to, like, if you were like, I'm not really a funny person, that's
okay. Just like say something. Yeah. Say like, I'm thinking of an example right now. Like, um,
I'm my greatest strength is that's one of the prompts, say something like, I don't know,
why did I put myself on the spot?
You know that song, I'm not as good as I once was,
but I'm as good once as I ever was.
That's how I am with parallel parking.
Oh, nice.
I don't know.
I don't know.
That's gonna move the needle for you though.
You're like, oh, well, in that case, I'm in on this girl.
I don't know where that just came from,
but something like that where it's like,
it's not even that funny.
It doesn't make that much sense.
It couldn't, it doesn't even have to be true,
but just something other than a normal answer.
Okay.
Can help you jump off the page.
Okay.
There you go.
I don't know why I didn't have any of this written down
to talk about, just fired up about the people's lack of,
no, people's fake zaniness.
Well, that could be maybe, maybe part of the problem
is that the online uh, online profiles are
not letting you see people that you are not interested in yourself. So maybe they don't
realize that they're not being zane or they're being unzany when they say tacos, because I think
everyone else is saying hamburgers or pizza. I got an idea. You know how, when you like,
you're in a new website, you don't know what the characteristics are to type your password.
And it's like, Oh yeah, you kind of weak you need a uh a character you
need a number yeah it should say that like uh 80 of the girls have already said this like okay i'm
glad you told me i will choose something else it's like a mad lib but like you only only like
100 000 people can use the word tacos like we're all out we're all out of tacos okay uh yeah you
gotta choose sliders oh okay you're only the third person who said that and then they're like yeah that's a little too original i don't know that's weird geckos so i've always thought i i've had this
written down in like my notes for like potential jokes i don't know what for but i love the idea
of like as you're typing in your password being told it's weak it is like i'll show you we think
that's weak yeah what about this asterisk and the pound symbol back to back?
Oh, we're good.
No one's ever going to think of that.
Oh, crap.
It's like Alcatraz in here.
It's so freaking secure.
Oh, man.
I have a friend who is like very, very paranoid about like all that stuff.
Like has burner accounts for all his emails that like.
Two-factor authentication.
Oh, oh.
He authentication.
There's no way that he's only two-factored.
I'm just going to say that right now.
It's probably quad-factored.
So I bought him some stuff at the warehouse sale.
I sent it to him and it was like 35 bucks or something like that.
He texted me.
He's like, hey, dude, is it okay if I send you $25 now and then $10 in like a week?
He's like, because or else I'll have to like get into my other funds and like send them to Venmo.
And I don't want to like get into my burner account funds.
What?
So he's got like different things like going on that like he doesn't trust any anything
out there like to like move money around or anything. It's it's very interesting. That is a
weird quirk. Of course I didn't care. I was like that's fine. Sure yeah it doesn't really make any
difference. Yeah it doesn't make a difference to me. But that's a good dating profile thing. Yeah.
I have eight Venmo accounts. Don't ask. And then one of my other friends who's also very techie like doesn't have he's like I don't do venmo or paypal
He's like i'll do that's really surprising or apple pay. But yeah, not any of those and i'm like
Surely there's not so many people out there getting hacked that this is a big deal
yeah, i've always been
very much like
I don't know. Yeah, you can have my cookies browser like you can i have nothing to
hide yeah about anything i mean obviously he's trying to hide like his money which makes sense
yeah but the most part like i just don't think the odds of getting hacked or just everything
that could happen to you is so low the odds of getting like struck by lightning or you know
hit like crashing in a plane crash like so many things that we worry about like are astronomically
low chances so you're just like giving yourself anxiety based on nothing yeah like you're you're
so much more likely to get mauled by a bear than you are dying a plane crash but no one is like
oh you don't want to go outside because there could be bears yeah yeah do you mind going
downstairs first to check on the geckos because there might be a grizzly down there i don't know
what is their diet like do they like amphibians i want to get mauled by a bear. Right. And so, yeah. Those are some of my thoughts.
What do you think? So you said the cookies thing. I have an opinion that I like that they have all
my information. Target my ads. Yes. That's 100%. Like I'm like, yeah, I didn't know that thing
existed. Now I do. And I want it. Yes. Thank you. Yeah. I'm surprised we've never talked about this like like maybe i'll just like talk into my phone every once in a while i'll
be like i am thinking about remodeling my roof like and then they send me some like cool tool
that no one ever knew existed that's like look at these way to remove and add shingles
uh that's funny i'm kind of in the mood for lasagna.
You know, whatever.
Like you get Tony's spaghetti sauce, you know, on the Target ads later.
Catherine walks in.
How to deal with a passive aggressive wife.
Easy tips and tricks.
Thank you, Jefferson Bethke for the responses there.
Yeah.
Anyway.
Yeah.
I was talking to him yesterday.
What? Yeah. Just out and and about does he live in hawaii out out in well it was i was gonna hit him up about i think about going back to hawaii of course it's awesome it just dawned on me
it's a new year so it's time to go to hawaii again it just dawned on me recently i was like
wait trey is getting married and that means he goes on a honeymoon.
So what am I going to do that week?
So you're going to film him?
I should get,
so I should go on his honeymoon.
Yeah,
you're like,
hey man,
yeah.
Hey,
do you want any like content?
Like any honeymoon be like?
Yeah.
Honeymoons be like.
Honeymoon be like.
Yeah.
So I was like,
well,
he's going to be gone.
I should take a vacation.
And then I was like,
never been to Maui.
And yeah,
I've become friends with Bethke
and he lives there.
Oh,
cool.
So not like stay with him, but like, it'd be fun to see him or he could probably show me around when
does he get married uh bethke's already married when does trey get just kidding that was a stupid
joke stupid god why did i say that may 23rd okay because ku always plays in a maui invitational
oh but i don't think it's in may It's probably like whatever, September or something like that.
Maybe there's another sport doing a Maui Invitational.
Maybe.
Probably out there.
I live to Froff.
So hopefully it's Frisbee golf.
That'd be fun.
Yeah.
I don't know.
Just thinking about it.
I also like that'll be right after we've just traveled for six weeks.
And then as soon as we're done touring, I'm going on another trip to Indianapolis.
So I'm like, maybe I will be done flying on planes and shouldn't plan something else. Do you think that's a real thing? Like, like, I think that's
maybe like a, in my, in my personality, two days is all I need to really refresh after that. I
think I'm like, I'm ready to go again. Oh yeah. Definitely with you there. Yeah. Don't need that
much. It's not like traveling. Like, Oh, I just need a day, like a vacation from my vacation.
I need a day at home, which I'm like, like okay whatever katherine's kind of like that she's like i just need to get back into rhythm and i'm like i'm in
the rhythm when i'm home like i'm home now yeah i could poop so much more comfortably that makes
me feel better and now i'm in my rhythm yeah hoover damn we threw in a joke a joke like that
in our this is adulthood video like a week ago i'm just like didn't even have a punchline it's
just like yeah i get back from my vacation on Tuesday,
probably go back to work on Thursday.
Just kind of need a day to get back in the swing of things.
Right, right.
Just because we felt,
I think that's relatable.
And yeah, so many comments.
People were like, I died at like,
yes, I do that for some reason.
I need to get back in the swing of things.
So I'll just say definitely with you there.
Don't need that much time to recoup, re-energize.
It's more just like,
I'll probably have seven weekends in a row
where I'm not in Kansas City.
Yeah.
So you might miss this. You add on another eight and nine like you know yes you
see my baby boy oh yeah yeah junior yeah yeah bj oh did you know i saw this week bj novak mindy
kayling yeah they have like a real relationship in real life what yeah it's like been going on
for a long time i was like how did i know this like there's a chance that Mindy's kid could be BJ's.
She's never talked about it.
And they've had an on again, off again relationship,
much like The Office for like years.
Like they kind of dated in like 2014 or something.
What?
And like, they're still like seeing photographed together all the time.
They claim that they're really good friends.
Huh?
I had no idea any of this was happening.
Oh, I would love that.
Granted, I only read one article this week.
So who knows how true it was?
What was the website?
Was it, you know, like...
Officegossip.net.
.net.
No, you can't trust anything..net.
SBCglobal.
Yeah.
.net.
Yeah, but...
That'd be awesome.
Yeah, it's kind of crazy.
It seemed like it kind of modeled their characters.
Well, because you always kind of like root for that kind of thing to be true in real life.
But then you realize they're usually married. And then, of course, you're like, well, I don't want them to... I always kind of like root for that kind of thing to be true in real life. But then you realize they're usually married.
And then, of course, you're like, well, I don't want them to.
I don't want to root for that.
Yeah.
Like Jenna Fisher and John Krasinski are married.
That would be infidelitous.
Right.
It's like you don't want that in real life.
No.
But if they're not, if there's just there's something there.
Mindy and BJ.
Okay.
Good times.
Yeah.
So I don't know.
Adopt a baby named Drake and then give it to Nellie. Is that what happens? That sounds times. Yeah. So I don't know. Adopt a baby named Drake and then give it to Nelly.
Is that what happens? That sounds right. Yeah. Huh. I love that. Have you listened to any more
of that podcast? The office ladies? I never did. I haven't listened to a single episode.
I haven't listened to it yet either because it was just so crunchy the first couple of weeks.
If you guys are out there and you listen to that podcast, let me know if it got any less cheesy.
Because like what would happen is they'd be like, Jenna, I have something written down.
And Jenna would go, you do?
What is it?
And I'm not trying to act like a podcast is easy to do.
Jake and I are clearly far from professionals doing this.
But we know how to just like talk as a normal like friendships. Like Like, I feel like we're just normally talking right now, mostly, you know?
And so, and they're, they claim to be like best friends and it just feels like they are reading
like from a back and forth, like, okay, now Angela is going to say, I have something written down
and you exclaim any, any exclamation you want up to you. Right. So maybe it's gotten better as
they've been more comfortable because that we you listen back to our old episodes,
we're definitely less comfortable than we are now.
Then again,
we're not actors.
Like that's what they do for a living.
It should be easy for them to just come in and be natural.
Maybe it's the opposite.
Because they're having to be natural.
That's not acting.
Yeah.
Maybe if they were told,
Hey,
act like this kind of woman,
they'd be like,
okay,
great.
I can,
I can do that.
Act normal and not like you're worth millions.
Like, okay. Yeah. Okay. I can, I can do that. Act normal and not like you're worth millions. Like, okay.
Yeah.
Okay.
I will try.
You do.
What do you mean?
You wrote it down.
I just don't know what it's like to, to be poor, you know?
So anyway.
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After decades of shaky hands caused by debilitating tremors,
Sunnybrook was the only hospital in Canada who could provide Andy with something special.
Three neurosurgeons.
Two scientists.
One movement disorders coordinator.
58 answered questions.
Two focused ultrasound procedures.
One specially developed helmet. Thousands of high-intensity focused ultrasound waves. I have something potentially currently trending.
Do you think you have something currently trending in your life?
Yeah.
Okay.
I don't want to go without you.
Okay.
You know,
throw off the balance.
In fact,
you go first.
Okay.
Currently trending in my life is this chair that I'm sitting in right now.
Tell the people about it.
Very excited about it.
A long time coming.
Yes.
We'll call it three weeks,
I think,
is the process.
Bought this chair off Facebook Marketplace.
That's generous, too.
I think it maybe could be a little longer.
It's a long process.
Bought this chair off Facebook Marketplace.
If you're watching on Facebook Live, hello.
And also, how did you get it?
How did you hack?
Yeah, you must be the kind of people that have Venmo in multiple accounts.
Multiple Venmos.
Bought this chair off Facebook Marketplace.
I could go on for a while about this story.
Long story short, this woman originally was selling it for $150.
Let's call her Mary Grace.
That's her name.
Okay.
That's a great name to call her then.
And Mary Grace, older woman, looked like a normal woman on Facebook.
And I just did the classic like
undercutter and then just hope we meet in the middle. So I messaged her and said, Hey,
I'm actually just looking for a temporary chair, $55. How's that sound? You know,
I'm not going to use it very often, but you live close to where Jake lives. So I said where I live.
Um, and she said in the kindest way possible, get out of town.
Like there's no way like this.
I paid $250 for this chair.
It was close to get out of town.
She said, move on from the city.
I was like, what?
Yes.
Be gone from Jerusalem.
Um, I think I know what you mean.
Yeah.
So anyway, she dust your feet off and leave.
Get back on your donkey and head out.
Are you trying to say get out of town?
Yeah.
Yeah.
Anyway, see, yeah, she's like, I spent $250 on this.
I really haven't used it at all.
It's in great, perfect condition.
So sorry.
And so I said, totally understand.
And then I noticed that she lowered the price a lot.
She lowered it down to a hundred
dollars like good for you for continuing to monitor yeah you didn't move on well because i
kept seeing all these other pictures for chairs and i was like i don't want any there's something
about mary grace's chair it looked nice and it looked like the kind of style i wanted it looked
nice and so notice you went down to 85 so i said said, hey, I'll do it for 60.
And she's like, no, Lois, I'm willing to go with 75.
And at that point, I just, it was a game.
I was just like, I gotta go for this.
You gotta make her do something she doesn't want to do.
Right, you just want to win at that point.
It's not about the money, like $15.
And that's kind of what I told her.
I was like, okay, I'm only willing to do 60 right now.
But yeah, if you're really willing to just go through the process of, you know,
messaging back and forth with a bunch of other people
that might not respond back to you for 15 extra dollars, I understand.
You know, kind of like very, very politely saying like,
I'm back in town and I'm not leaving.
And I'm staying on my donkey.
And my donkey is firm.
My burro is firm against the heel scythe.
But on that note, it is getting uncomfortable.
And I'd like to sit in your chair very soon.
Jake's metal chairs are not cutting it.
The hard donkey.
13 degree down angle.
And so anyway, she didn't do anything.
Then I noticed, I was looking maybe a week later,
noticed that she had
done a new, uh, listing for it and gave you a lot more information about the model number.
And like, like took a picture of the manual. It sounds like this is starting to become like
your chair lady, like Michael Scott. I got to find this woman. I was determined. I just wanted
to win. I'm a competitive guy. And so she like sent this, you know, all these different things,
you know, all this different information. And I Googled this chair model and found it on office Depot. Like she said, $250, but it was like this flash sale for $85 brand new screenshot that.
And I said, Hey, Mary Grace, my new offer is $50 because look, it's only going for 85, right?
Brand new. And she responded back,
it's your lucky day, Brad. You have a late Christmas present. You can come pick it up for
$50. So that's where the story gets good because I go and pick it up. Mary Grace, interesting lady,
was expecting her to live in a pretty nice house for having a $250 office chair that she didn't
want or never used. It's a fair assumption. She did not.
She lived in an apartment that seemed like it was built in the 70s
and had not been touched since the 70s.
Okay.
I walk in.
I knock on the door.
She opens it up.
First of all, the door said,
if in case of fire, and this was like a serious,
it wasn't like a bumper sticker.
It was like, in case of fire, please rescue Kat.
And I was like, oh boy.
Huh. Who is this kind of like? She rescue cat. And I was like, oh boy. Huh?
What, who is this kind of like, you know, she opens up the door and I'm not kidding.
I bet.
I don't like that sign.
No, no, no more signs.
She opens up the door and I think there's probably 18 inches worth of a hallway.
Like, like she has a whole full door, you know, angle, but she has so many like shelves of things. And I'm not going
to call her a hoarder in the like traditional sense of the word. Cause she doesn't have like
newspapers and like, you know, clippings of conspiracy stuff thrown about and stuff like
that. Like, you know, like the yarn, like connecting different people. I don't know
if that's what hoarders have or if that's just a deranged cop, but, um, she's not like that,
but she had so many different things and she wanted to show me all of them. Like trinkets? Trinkets. She's like, I'm a retired veteran. And so I have a lot of
Americana. I'm a Catholic. You should really go Catholic. And so I have this, you know,
that she's like, you know, this is my pro-life, you know, shelf. These are my exotic animals.
You look, there's like a little subtext. It's like pro-life, but for cats. Oh, wait, you know, uh, shelf. These are my exotic animals. You look, there's like a little subtext.
It's like pro-life, but for cats. Oh wait, what is this? Stop cat abortions. Is this a stance?
No more. Yeah. No more abortions for whiskers. Um, yeah. Anyway, uh, then she, then she like
turned over to, you know, to the other side of the hallway. She's like, and this, uh, is an,
is an urn with my ashes from one of my cats. know we lost her after about 15 years and it's just really devastating for me and she got like
a shrine for this cat how big is a cat urn not not big i would not think big at all like a shot
like a toddler size shoebox is what i would say okay i can imagine it yeah um maybe even a baby
size shoebox so i'm imagining this apartment being like uh what is it it's a small world
a disneyland or disney, kind of a bunch of little cardboard
things and you're kind of creeped out and you have no space to move.
Right.
It was, that's what I'm imagining.
Like you, like I was a literal bull in a China shop.
Like I felt like, like my shoulders were going to actually bump something that was going
to bump 300 more things.
And Mary Grace is going to say more expletively, get out of town.
Okay.
Would you rather be, you know, someone trying to ride you in there for 10 seconds or with
the alligator or crocodile in there for 10 seconds?
Classic scenario.
Yeah, right, right, right.
From last week.
Okay.
Sorry.
Keep going.
So then this is, this is where I think it's hilarious and it's a little embarrassing,
but she's like, now how much do you weigh?
She kind of looked me up and down.
She's like, how much do you weigh?
When's the last time you had Burger King?
Who told you?
Oh, what?
You friends with cops?
My wife told me I should just eat at home.
I know.
It was one Whopper Junior.
How does everyone find out about this?
It's Coke with vanilla in it.
See, how much do you weigh?
How much do you weigh?
And I was like, oh, whatever. I don't know what I said.
275. She's like, well, uh, you know, this, this only supports, this only supports 250 pounds. So
you should really lose some weight, Brad. Like she like used my name, your name. You should
really like putting the name on the end of it really kind of hurt. Like where are you? My
fitness trainer. You should really lose some weight, Brad. I was like, Mary Grace, you're
not too fleet of foot yourself. Yeah.
It doesn't look like you know your way around the Atkins diet.
Yeah. It looks like you've stepped on a few cattails in your life too, okay?
Yeah.
Actually, I got some questions.
How did sprinkles over here pass away?
Asphyxiation?
You roll over them on your sleep?
Right.
Yeah.
What's going on here, Mary Grace?
I'll throw around some conspiracy theories.
We can go back and forth.
You know, when you are fat, you could say, you know, the F word to other people too.
Anyway. That's what the documentary Don F word to other people too. Anyway.
That's what the documentary Don't F with Cats is about.
It's larger people with cats.
It's Don't Fat with Cats.
You guys should watch that documentary though.
The F stands for something else, but it's very, very good.
Anyway, three, four more times during the conversation, she told me I needed to lose weight.
What?
It was just like, and I was like, I was very polite to her. I was like, okay. Yeah. Okay. Yeah. You're right. Think about it. You're
right. You're right. And she like the very last time she told me, she goes only for the chair,
only for the chair. You need to lose weight. No other reason. Yeah. And I'm like, yeah,
right lady. Like anyway. So then I was like, how in the world am I getting this chair out of here? That is so weird.
And so I basically like put it on top of my head backwards.
On the bull's horns.
And so like the back of the seat was like in front of my face.
Like the bill of a cap, but tilted way down.
Yes.
I was going blind and Mary Grace was directing me.
And I was like, this is a, there's no way I'm going to get out of here.
I was holding it going so slowly. I got out of there and no way I'm going to get out of here. I was holding it, going so slowly.
I got out of there and just ran for my life, basically.
I can't even imagine being that crowded in someone's home.
It was very uncomfortable.
Like where you're having to carry a chair on your head without seeing.
It was ridiculous.
This woman's fat shaming you while you're like, hey, come on, Lardo.
Come on, follow me.
Hey, come on.
Faster there, piggy.
Yeah, I was just like come on but there's been a few times probably
probably about three times every year where i think to myself how do i get in these situations
that's a weird one yeah that's that's about as weird as it gets but like i feel like i just push
push too hard and then this is what happens you know i feel like i'm getting the deal of a lifetime
and i had to work for it a little bit. But anyway, that's my currently trending.
I'm in my seat now and it is so comfortable.
It is so nice, so perfect.
I got a great deal on it.
I thought I liked my seat this whole time, but now I'm like, well, if I can get a story out of that or like that out of it, I'll find a chair.
Well, okay.
That's kind of transitions from that.
Have I told you I won a class action lawsuit for a $75 gift card to a thrift store?
Oh yeah.
Is that the Cerner one or is this a different lawsuit?
This is a different one.
Like apparently I was like part of like a list of people who got called like an info,
infomercial, not what's the right word for telemarketer, but like it was like illegally,
they illegally did it or something.
And so they gave me $75 towards savers thrift store and so i'm like what can i have you know what can i do with the 75
dollars that could be like really fun and epic besides just like getting ralph lauren clothes
that have a little stain on them or something you know like what can i do that like would really set
me apart so maybe this is part of that same story okay with your chair and or the studio or whatever.
I don't know.
Something podcast or story related.
There's got to be a bigger thing here that we can have like, besides just like going
and getting decent clothes that somebody else has already worn and smell like old man.
Yeah.
Okay.
That's something good to think about.
Yeah.
We'll think about it.
If you have any thoughts, five-star review.
If you already left a five-star review, by the way, I know that's like, people are like,
oh, I've already left my review. Find a friend. Tell them about it. Get on their phone and put another five-star review. If you already left a five-star review, by the way, I know that's like, people are like, oh, I've already left my review.
Find a friend.
Tell them about it.
Get on their phone
and put another five-star review out there.
Steal their phone when they're asleep.
Not that hard.
Yeah.
It's easy.
Face ID,
they just have to get one pupil up.
So they can still be sleeping.
You can just lift up the pupil
and put the face ID in there.
Brad just demonstrated
what that should look like.
It looked like an eyewash state.
Like Andy when he's the actor.
No, that's a good call.
It's something to think about.
Currently trending, Jake.
Well, real quick, before we get to currently trending,
I put a bookmark mentally in telemarketer.
Okay.
I got a call yesterday.
Well, like I said, I was on the phone with so many people yesterday
from who I thought was a telemarketer.
They've been calling me like crazy.
So I was going to answer.
I'm like, can you take me off this list?
I answer, and it's my old university.
And they're just like, hey, we're just calling to check in on some of our alumni.
Okay.
And turns out she just wanted a donation.
She wanted my money.
The Alumni Association.
But I stayed on the phone with her for 27 minutes.
Oh, the old financial advisor trick.
Like, hey man, just wanted to check in how you're doing. Well, we'd love to, you know, the old financial advisor trick. Like, Hey man, just wanted to check it out.
You're doing well. Would love to, uh, you know, raise some funds with you. And yeah,
she just like kept asking me questions. It wasn't even like me trying to like,
I'm going to keep her on the line. Cause she was like a nice girl, but she was like,
so, you know, what are you, what have you been up to since college? So I just kind of told her
everything. You were proud of what you've been up to. So you're like, okay, what else?
Twice last year. I want to get into this year. I went again this year, I think.
Thinking about going to Maui.
Haven't been Mauied myself,
but I will go to Maui.
Mauied!
Maui!
And it was real fun.
She's like, wow, well,
Jake, thank you for your time.
And I got to say,
that is the most entertaining phone call I've ever had
while working in the call center.
That's great.
I'm glad I made her day
or something like that. But I do try to be kind to those people because I'm like,
it's gotta be so boring for them. They probably get, they probably have three second, five second
phone calls all day. That was kind of my thought. Yeah. I had just gotten off the phone call. I'd
just gotten home. I said, Oh Isaac, what's up dude. And then I got a phone call and I was like,
dang, I kind of want to, you know, relax and get home. But yeah, talk to Brittany,
Brittany at SPU. if you're listening good
luck on that english degree and uh good luck with the call center oh so it was like a reciprocal
conversation like she talked to you about her life too with the english that's actually all
she loved with hey my name is britney i'm a junior english major at sbu okay and i just
remembered that i don't really know much about her life i was thinking like now tell me what
your strengths finders top five are Brittany what's your enneagram
like by the end of it
I'm just like praying for
like hey
and like that is tough
like you know
mental health is obviously
like you know
a tricky thing
and
no but
currently training
for me
kind of the opposite
of what I just
discussed
I would say that was
a fun interaction
currently training for me
strange lady interactions
okay
strange being more the
adjective for interactions not the ladies themselves okay but not the merry graces of
the world no i think the ladies were i don't know up to you i'll tell you let me know uh
yeah just been a lot this past week one that i already told you about um which i'm nervous about
maybe stuff like this happening more and more. I get done playing basketball last week and someone has like gone through my entire Instagram
and found and commented on pictures of my ex-girlfriend from college from May of 2012,
I think. And then like gone to her page and commented things on there. And I did not like
that. I was so embarrassed and I felt so uncomfortable. And like, I was like, so now I got a message, my ex-girlfriend from seven years ago, like, Hey, I'm so sorry. I'm
really embarrassed. Then I'm messaging this person being like, why are you doing that? Don't do that.
And then in 24, 24 hours later, then I get a text from someone and it says, Hey, is this Jake? And
I'm like, it is, who's this? And they're like, is this actually Jake? And I'm like, yeah, what's up?
And they're like, Oh, you had your phone number in one of your captions. So I was like, it is. Who's this? And they're like, is this actually Jake? And I'm like, yeah, what's up? And they're like, oh, you had your phone number in one of your captions. So
I was just testing it out. And I was like, what? And they're like, yeah, it was a post from April
of 2015. I found it. And sure enough, they were right. I guess that was silly of me. I mean,
granted, I was working at youth ministry at the time. Wasn't that crazy then? But someone finding
stuff like that and then just being like, just what's up, dude? Found your number number so it's been a big week of me like purging my own instagram because now i'm
nervous these two things happen within a 24 hour span of people being freaking weirdos i mean not
that weird but weird to me weird enough that they're yeah they're they're uh what and what
and all they can get of jake so they're going to 2015 i yeah i don't like it i don't like it at all
not even a little bit i'm gonna start going on like your very first post and just commenting. Like we're
going to have conversations. That's how I'm going to ask you, like, if you want to get lunch,
you know, check out this sunset, you know, no hashtag, no filter. Hey dude,
want to go get Chick-fil-A? I think my first picture now that I've deleted the other ones
is a sunset in Honduras. So yes, leave a comment and we'll go get lunch. That's
great. Last strange lady interaction yesterday. I get a DM from someone and it was something,
uh, kind of funny, kind of clever. Didn't respond to it in the moment because I'm talking about
Angus farming with my boy in the car yesterday. But, uh, I click and see like, maybe do I know
this person? And so I like watch this girl's story to like try
and get context, like, who are you, whatever. And then don't respond to the message yet.
Then later that day, I get a notification, like you've been tagged in a story and it's that girl's
story, screenshotted it. And it tags me and says like, what in the world? Why is Jake Triplett
viewing my story? This is so weird. Like you DM'd me.
That's why.
Now I'm like nervous for that too.
Like if I look at someone's story,
I could like end up being kind of poked fun of
on their story for doing that.
I don't like that you can see who's viewed your story.
I don't think that's necessary to do.
I hardly ever look at it.
Yeah, it's not even beneficial.
There was a Ghostrunners guy that messaged me one time.
And like anytime I see like one of those story circle sure it's just an instinct
like yeah who are you and he's like hey dude like you should follow me like i'm like i really wanted
a non-committal story watch that was all i was looking for yeah yeah i i struggle with that too
of like why why are they showing and why are you looking like whatever that's just a funny thing to
to look at i i sometimes will look at to see how many people have viewed it but i never like click in there and
see like oh specifically who yeah because it's such a random order like it's not like anything
in there is helpful really right i don't know yeah i've never really looked at it but it's not
like it shows you like oh this person's viewed it 18 times yeah that might be like maybe if you view
a story more than three times we'll say say, you should be on the list.
You get on some sort of like, yeah, no flight list or something.
No watch list.
Yeah, anyway.
But yeah, just currently turning.
Strange lady interactions.
I can't believe, what is he doing looking at my story?
It's like, you slid into my DMs first.
I'm doing my due diligence just seeing who you are.
It's not that crazy.
No, no.
No, it's not.
Not in this day and age.
No. No, no, no, it's not. Not in this day and first. Like, hey, how'd you get here?
Yeah.
And then I don't know what to do with that later,
but,
uh,
maybe you are Jake Gyllenhaal to some people.
Maybe you're getting there,
man.
But I didn't DM Jake Gyllenhaal first because that would explain why he's looking at my story.
Okay. I get it now.
Yeah.
Oh,
I did.
I did shoot you a message.
So yeah,
that's currently trending.
Brad,
what do you say next?
Well,
what would you
prefer blanks anyway or voice in house uh blanks of the week next okay sweet blanks of the week
yikes okay let's start with um i'm gonna start with poultry okay this girl could have so easily
been my babe of the week, but 180, now
she's poultryizing me. Oh man. So she's getting put on blast too because I go to open mic night
Wednesday. Yeah. This is another just like random place that I heard does comedy. I, you know, I go
by myself. I don't tell anyone and I show up and immediately I see, I'll tell you afterwards who
they were, but I saw two old K-Life kids who are now married. They were there. I have, I have a guess. Okay. Uh, I see
them. They're like, Oh, this is so fun. What are you guys doing? They're like, Oh, we're just
supporting our friends. I was like, okay, well that's fun. You know, I guess that's kind of fun
to have a familiar face out here, whatever. Uh, and then they were like, well, I think so-and-so
over there knows you too. And so, so then I'm talking to these other people and find out,
yeah, we have mutual friends.
They like know, know Trey Kennedy.
It's not like, oh yeah, I follow him.
They're like, they're friends with him and I know them.
And then while I'm talking to all these other people,
this is all happening very fast.
I'm making all these connections.
Like, oh snap.
Like people in the audience are going to like know who I am now.
It's getting nerve wracking.
And then a random girl comes up and goes,
I listened to your podcast.
I go, no way.
No way.
Like it just kept getting better and better and better.
And I was like, that is so cool.
And so one, I learned, yeah, all these people are going to be there.
And so I'm like, well, I was going to test out, you know, all my new material.
I'm like, I don't want to let them down.
So maybe I should like do some old stuff that I know will hit to like impress them.
So I'm like going back and forth on what I should say.
Oh, that's another thing.
Side poultry.
45 comedians were there Wednesday night.
I went 41st.
No, you went second the last week.
Yeah.
And so there was no one there by the time I went.
Or yeah, by the time I went on stage.
And you had to stay there for a long time.
It was three hours.
Oh, that's a side poultry.
The main poultry is that Alana, who said she listened to my podcast, was so excited to
hear me, left before I went on stage.
No!
Alana, you had Babe of the Week locked up so easily.
Alana was gonna.
By the time you went on.
Come on.
You're kidding.
I couldn't believe it.
So now I don't know who this girl is.
I don't know her last name.
Alana's a tricky word to spell.
I have no way of knowing.
Where'd you go-go?
Yeah.
Wake.
Yeah.
Jake you up before you go-go.
That's what you should have done.
That's what she should have done.
Gosh.
And she left.
She didn't get to hear it.
And yeah, that's my poultry is that Alana got me so hyped up and then dipped.
Come on.
Alana went Ghana before I went Anna.
That should be the new theme song.
Alana went Anna.
Oh wait, no.
Alana went Ghana before I went Anna.
Alana went Ghana.
Sad.
Alana went Ghana. That's the Hattie part
You should really go Catholic
We should get Dobie to put it in there
You should really be Catholic
All these little soundbites
Catherine loved that I used the phraseology
Go Catholic
It sounds like something that you're pledging
80 pie
Hey go Catholic
Where's my Catholic sisters hey go go catholic go go where's my catholic sisters go go go go jp3
whatever is that john paul iii i guess yeah that was what i was thinking pope reference jp3 hey
hey i really think you should rush jp3 uh anyway um my poultry of the week is hand dryers i hate
them that's it i mean hand dryers hand dryers for some reason they said
hannah dryer i was like i think it's a girl i follow on instagram okay no hannah dryer's fine
hannah dryer probably is gonna but um hand dryers suck hand dryers suck they they they blow but they
suck and in the same sense they kind of just blow at the same time hot air yeah like these hand
dryers blow yeah they're
just simultaneously doing it all and they're doing it all poorly hand dryers are a great excuse to
kind of kill some time while you wait for your hands to dry on their own it's ridiculous because
the hand dryer themselves is not drying them give me a yeah yeah maybe i've already talked about
this because i feel like i've said this before but i was like i was gonna say give me a like i'll go plant five trees
right now and just like let me sign a contract that has like a badge that gets me into like
you know paper towels for the rest of my life napkin access yes give me some access yes um
little life hack of the week that kind of goes in with the sure culture of the week is and this is
gonna sound ridiculous and probably bad idea but what i
do sometimes with the hair dryer or hand dryer is i use it for about five seconds let's be uh
generous with that five seconds and then i use my hands or my hair for the rest of the dry experience
yeah i've definitely done it before so they're like kind of kind of uh dry and i just kind of
throw in the hair just kind of swoop it a little bit and get out of there let it let it air dry
let's do some asmr move the pop filter get your hair next to the mic let them hear let
me hear your hair you think it's good i think that was really really good did we get it did
we get the shot and cut we got the got the hair-a-some-ar.
It's done.
Hair-a-some-ar.
Hair-a-some-ar.
Oh, that's good.
Yeah, hand dryers are not that great.
And there's some that are pretty powerful,
but even still, like the idea is just-
No, even the powerful ones don't work that well though.
They just kind of-
The Dysons?
They just move the water
to a different part of your hand.
Like most of the time it just goes to my fingertips.
Now I got slimy tips.
That's the last thing I want.
Absolutely.
You try to eat a burger with slimy tips?
Nope.
Not only are you allergic to that burger,
you shouldn't be eating that,
but also it's slipping out of your hands.
Yeah, and you got a soggy bun.
Yes.
Yeah.
Soggy buns.
Soggy buns on your slimy tips.
And now I'm having flu-like symptoms
because of the alpha-gal syndrome, whatever I have.
Alpha-gal allergy.
That's exactly right.
Yeah, that's a good poultry.
Hand dryers, get them out.
Get them all the way out of here.
Hand dryers blow. That could be all the way out of here hand dryers
blow that could be it maybe i'll title that the okay the episode that's good it's punning yeah
it is and freaking true did it we just do that the end of all of our poultry that's freaking true man
and by the way i mean that that's freaking true you guys i'm serious My babe of the week is not Alana. Said goodbye. So it's someone else.
Said alohana to Alana.
Ohana.
But the goodbye version.
It means family. I love doing that in Hawaii. I know three Hawaiian words, maybe. Mahalo,
aloha, and ohana. And just making sure I say them wrong. You know, like, okay, instead of saying Mahalo for thank you, like, and here's your meal, sir.
Oh, Ohana.
Hey, good to see you guys.
Mahalo.
Yeah.
Oh, how's your Aloha doing?
Or that too.
Calling everything.
Okay.
Anyway, my baby of the week is pop star Dua Lipa.
I probably should have double checked.
That's even how you say her name.
Two words or one word?
Two words.
Okay.
You heard of her?
No, but I'm not very deep in the pop star charts.
Just kind of putting out hit after hit and I am into it.
Okay.
Like, and I've, I've, I've said both sides of this spectrum.
Like I've said one, how much I enjoy just like catchy, shallow music.
And I also kind of like ripping on pop music because it's so shallow and so stupid.
And I'm not saying her stuff is really about anything, but it's just like, it's better
than a lot of the other pop music out there.
It's just really catchy.
Really enjoy it.
It kind of reminds me, I think she's in a state now of like Lady Gaga, like 2008 or
nine of just like kind of hit after hit after hit.
Oh yeah.
And I'm digging it.
Just dance.
I'm here for it. Yeah. Kind of the, yeah. Disco stick, just dance, poker face, that whole like.
She has a song that has 1.3 billion views or listens.
Just on Spotify?
Yeah.
That's crazy. So yeah, I haven't even looked up her stats. I really don't know how popular she
is right now, but.
That, sorry, go ahead. But that's just unbelievable. I've never even heard of this girl that has one billion for one song.
How many monthly listeners does she have?
51 million.
No way.
That's huge.
Okay.
She's way bigger than I thought she even was.
I remember first hearing about her.
One of my friends in Los Angeles is in a small group with the lead singer for Lainey.
Yeah.
And I guess she dumped him.
And then like Lainey's next album was like all about her. So I so i was like oh that's kind of a fun fact to know and look at
her now she's she's doing just fine but yeah she's gonna be like i i could see her like performing
at a super bowl soon like she's gonna be an icon i think she's my babe of the week i can't i can't
get over the 1.3 i'm gonna look up justin bieber and see like i know he's the number one artist on
spotify so he may not be the best one to compare it to he's like the most listed two artists on spotify well that's my point okay
is that as far as his top five go maybe he's got one below it which wouldn't really make sense
but his most listened to song is i don't care with 921 million whoa no no billion no no billions
like that's amazing bill i've never seen a billion let me look up drake
drake's got 1.4 million on god's plan zillion 1.4 so this song is almost as popular it must be like
she must be pretty popular internationally too though do a leap it does seem like people like
the the pitbulls and people that can speak two languages do well. I've not heard any Espanol, but her name is funny.
So yeah.
Wow.
Lady Gaga's got one that's 1 billion.
Good for her.
That's my girl.
What were we?
Oh, Pitbull.
Let's look at Mr. OY.
Mr.
Anyone who can cater to like two very different like nationalities.
Oh, Pitbull.
Pitbull's not even close.
Oh, really?
Well, nevermind.
639 million.
Get out of here.
That's nothing.
Yeah.
What a loser.
My babe of the week is probably going gonna go to lady gaga um after this no oh let's fight um my babe of the week is somebody
who um has just been really intentional and wonderful to me we uh celebrated valentine's
day together last week um and she's just sweet. She's
just my partner in crime. No way. Yeah. You know, every once in a while we just do zany things like
watching, you know, silly movies about cops in bed that she just doesn't think are very funny.
And then all of a sudden I'm like, wait a second, I'm not supposed to, you know,
be watching movies in bed with girls, but it turns out it's okay because it's, it's intramarital. She's my wife.
Intramarital. That's funny. We had a discussion about that word last night. Thanks for bringing
that back for me. No one else even gets that. No, that's a, that's a completely inside,
inside joke. That's funny. But my wife is my babe of the week. Her name is Catherine Ellis.
K-A-T-H-R-Y-N for anybody that wants to follow her on Instagram.
She will probably not let you because she's private, but that's okay.
Good for her.
That's her name.
And she's great.
I love her so much.
And honorary babe of the week, of course, Hattie Ellis, who's just swagger as ever.
A smaller partner in crime.
Which the only reason she's so great, well, 90% of the reason she's so great is because
of my wife, Babe of the Week, Catherine Ellis.
But a new fun, cute thing that Hattie's doing these days, because somebody asked last week,
so I might just say something new every week.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I think it started out as a funny thing that's become a habit.
But anytime she says her B's and P's's, I think she kind of does like a,
like if she wants to say bring, she kind of like not rolls it, but she goes like, bring, bring.
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Mom, mom brought that home. Like, and she does it like every time now.
It's so cute and funny, but also I'm like, is that a bad habit that we should break or not but
right now i'm just loving it just cute for now hasn't become an issue no don't you get any slps
involved not yet okay not we don't need to get trump's guys involved you're like donald donald
trump speaking to your daughter yeah what would that be like hattie oh actually i should i should
share that video that i have. Yeah, you should.
Last night at McDonald's was a hoot and a half.
Yeah, it was a good time.
First, the intermarital thing.
We were talking about our other friend, Scott.
Shout out, Scott.
He asked me, he's like, Jake, I know you're a big Bieber fan.
What do you think of his new album?
I was like, actually, I've straight up not even listened to it yet.
So I don't know.
I was like, I've heard two singles.
I like Intentions.
That's pretty catchy.
Yummy was decent.
It's about a
post-marital intercourse. And then we were laughing and Brad's like, it makes it sound
like they're divorced now when you say post-marital. Yeah. The woman's dead. Yeah. Like
we were married and now it's, it's afterwards it's post-marital. So intramarital. What do you
call it when it's during marriage? And then we, we decided on intra. Yeah. So, so that was fun.
And then the other aspect, we were talking about animojis last night at McDonald's. Yeah. So I, uh, like you can like create your own animoji.
So a few different times I've created different people. One of them looked like Patrick Mahomes
and one of them looks like Donald Trump. And I'll like do an animoji as Patrick Mahomes and then
send it to my friends and be like, Hey man, happy birthday. Hope you have a great day. We won
Superbowl, you know, like stuff like that. And there was one time I did a Donald Trump one
and Hattie's at the background, like distracting me.
So in my Donald Trump voice, I'm just like,
China is incredible.
You know, and then she's like screaming around.
I'm just like, Hattie.
It's pretty funny.
I'll post it next week sometime.
Yeah, we should put it on our story.
Yeah, post it somewhere.
It's pretty funny.
I just think it's, yeah, it's a good one.
So anyway, Hattie and Katty are my babes of the Wattie.
Nice.
Yeah.
Let's end it with review of the week.
We've got, we got another like 13 reviews or something this week.
Did get a four star one.
I'm going to call it an accident again.
You think so?
They did say like, love the podcast.
You guys are great.
They came here from TJ and Brooke.
Shout out Walk and Love.
Excited to see them soon it'll be fun but anyway my review of the week goes to hannah in parentheses no green car that's okay that's why you're probably leaving a review and
not a voice memo the title is flowers die chicken is forever she says speaking as a woman i don't
really care about flowers for valentine's, the perfect gift is a rotisserie chicken.
An entire rotisserie chicken.
If you want, you can make it last as long or longer than flowers.
Or you can eat the entire thing in one sitting.
The possibilities are endless.
It could then end up literally being your poultry of the week.
Oh!
Thanks for creating this podcast that brightens my Mondays and makes me look like a little crazy.
Or makes me look a little crazy in front of my coworkers,
sending much love from Ontario.
Keep doing whatever it is that makes so many people listen.
You guys are great.
Good night.
That was awesome.
I love the wording of that.
It's like an Ernest Hemingway,
but with comedy.
That one's not even showing up on my screen.
I've never,
I've never read that one.
Oh,
no way.
That's so fun.
Huh?
That's awesome.
We should cross,
cross examine each other more and make sure we're not missing out on any of these things. Yeah. I'm just looking at podcast.apple.com or the Apple podcast app where you can rate us five stars. Yes. Okay. Uh, wow. That's really
cool. Um, I like the one it's, it's a titled butt licker. A podcast has never been better.
Great title. Um, and just says never knew listening to two guys talk about random stuff
could be so entertaining. This is from KGL7822.
Might be listening too much because I had dreamed that Chick-fil-A parked a food truck near my house and I stopped for some nugs before I went to the hospital.
I love when people are like, always like, you know, like I just have to eat fast food.
Like you have to eat fast food if you listen to this podcast.
Like you're going to want Chick-fil-A.
You're not going to think we're funny if you don't.
It's a lifestyle choice.
And then they said, only disappointing thing is that Jake isn't going to follow through with selling his plasma to save for a ring and call it a blood diamond. I forgot about that. Yeah, it's a lifestyle choice. And then they said, only disappointing thing is that Jake isn't going to follow through
with selling his plasma to save for a ring and call it a blood diamond.
I forgot about that.
Yeah, it's a great idea.
Funny and financially responsible.
So what more could a girl want?
You're checking all the boxes.
Seeing the bees.
There was a guy at open mic night who was like, anyone ever sold plasma?
And no one said anything.
So I was like, yeah.
He's like, all right, there's my guy.
There's my plasma boy.
Reconnected.
Halo, right? Plasma guns? Yeah, yeah. You use that in the battle rifles. Must have gone like, yeah. He's like, all right, there's my guy. There's my plasma boy. We connected.
Halo, right?
Plasma guns?
Yeah, yeah.
You use that in the battle rifles.
Must have gone through a lot of blood banks there, huh?
Yeah.
One, just one liner from a pod. My favorite one liner of the review this week comes from Catherine Zeta-Skarn.
It says, you know, love the podcast.
I'd like to contribute my own poultry of the week.
This girl keeps coming over to my apartment all the time and will literally shower here
and make dinner in the kitchen and sometimes sit in my favoriteltry of the week. This girl keeps coming over to my apartment all the time and will literally shower here and make dinner in the kitchen
and sometimes sit in my favorite spot on the couch.
But it turns out she's my roommate.
Oh!
That's funny.
CZ Scarn.
That's really funny.
I like that a lot.
There was a funny review about how their mom,
somebody's mom,
slowly transitioned them from skim milk
after having whole.
From, yeah, whole to skim.
Whole to skim, yeah.
Yeah.
Transitioning's tough. Yeah. And they they did the classic ron swanson quote which i love there's only one
thing i hate more than lying skim milk which is water that's lying about being milk um there's
yeah there's so many there was one person i was gonna say jeff jeff polinger yeah jeff poling
jr um he said clean hilarious and long and he said he gave
us seven different things he loved about it and they're all very sweet um but number three said
each episode is in capital letters so long and i drive two hours a day for work so it's great
part of me took a little fence to the capital s o on on there. Like, so just sounds like, like each episode is, each
episode is so long. I drive, you know, but it's like each episode is so long. It just feels like
it's like, it's a little excruciatingly long. Like, do I need to shorten it up a little bit?
Brad, I love your hat. My grandpa has the same one. Okay. Do you love the hat? You could have
like tagged it with something better at the end there. No, Jeff. One of Jeff's other things was
each episode comes with a new entrepreneurial opportunity.
I wasn't aware of that.
I wasn't aware we were giving those away for free.
Expand on that for us, Jeff, with the Friends review.
Maybe he just means Ellis Custom Creations.
It's an opportunity for him to buy from an entrepreneur.
Probably.
Yeah.
Custom table or cutting board.
Shippable.
Yes.
So shippable.
It's stupid.
Oh, so shippable.
Oh, so smug and shippable it's it's stupid oh so shippable oh so smug and shippable uh random thought on that
is things are too expensive to ship at the post office do you know that i went and shipped t-shirts
to my friends from the warehouse sale and i had to pay like for like for some of them i had to pay
13 14 to ship these boxes i think the post office as a business has been doing poorly for a long time.
Yeah. It's like hemorrhaging money. Yeah. I've heard that. Like they're like losing money left
and right. They have hemorrhoids? Yes. In the envelopes. Oh, wait. So what's anthrax?
It's the same thing. Oh, okay. Yeah. So they have to charge more. You think that's what it is?
On hemorrhoid. So should I be going to like FedEx? I don't know. What do they have?
Lupus?
HPV?
Yeah.
It's something.
Maybe.
I don't know.
Yeah.
Shipping is just expensive.
But also, aren't they the only monopoly that's like allowed by the government?
Well, they're not a monopoly though.
No, with sending mail. Like you can't send mail any other way than the U.S. Postal Service.
I think it's like the only like... Oh, you can't send a letter through FedEx. I don't think so. Oh,
interesting. I didn't know that. I could be wrong. I guess, I guess I would just assume that you
could do that. I've been wrong like once before on this podcast. So, I mean, it definitely could
happen again. Like FedEx is like, Hey, that envelope's too small. Put it in a box and we'll
save it for you. Like, yeah, I don't know. I really thought I read somewhere that they were like the only like allotted monopoly allowed.
That sounds like a fun fact.
It sounds like it could be true.
I like to believe it.
It's definitely possible.
Who knows?
Anyway, thank you for all the reviews.
I cannot tell you how genuinely much we appreciate it.
I check it every day.
I don't know about you, Jake, but just in case like like everyone so I'll be like
I haven't checked haven't checked the reviews
It's a funnest thing to check out of everything I do it is taking I said funnest
Stupid it is the most fun thing for me to check more than DMS more than Facebook views more than whatever else, you know
More than those you can say any people on tinder. It's the podcast reviews. So keep them coming. We're very appreciative.
Absolutely.
From here, do you want to voicemail?
We have quite a few to listen to.
And we're currently at, ooh, we're already over an hour.
This is the classic, like, we both come and we're like,
we don't have that much to talk about this time.
I got nothing.
Yeah, that's when it flows, baby.
So let's listen to these voice memos and rock them from there.
Yeah.
Hey, guys, my name's Emily.
I have a very, very serious and important question that I have for you guys today
that the people would like to know. So I am a very big Chick-fil-A fan as are you guys. And I was
eating Chick-fil-A for dinner tonight and I got three of the fries that were from the butt of the
potato. So these are the fries. I don't think
they're near as good as the normal waffle fries. And they honestly just kind of make me a little
bit upset, but you know, I still eat them anyways. I get over it and I eat it. But I was wondering,
how do you guys feel whenever you get one of these fries that's the butt of the potato?
So the people would like to know, so please let me know.
Thanks. I feel personal shame when it comes time to eat those. In high school, I was given the
nickname, uh, potato butt for the shape that my own butt was in. Gosh. Yeah. And so whenever
back when you were a little spud. Yeah. And so, so yeah i really don't like eating those for that reason because it reminds me of the shape of my
old butt yeah you're back back before i got worked on on it it is it is before i traded it in i got
some skin grafts from my thighs i put it on my back thighs and yeah now it's a it's at the middle
of a potato i've become a stud spud yeah yeah, I actually don't like them though. I don't
think they're as good. You still eat them? No. You don't? No. Then again, you don't, you don't,
you probably only eat like 70% of your fries. I was going to say, if I'm only going to eat half
the fries, I got no time for chicken butts. Wait, was that a thing in like elementary school? What's
up chicken butt? Wasn't that a thing? Yeah. Rachel Mustaine. It was a Rachel Mustaine thing for sure.
Oh yeah. I went to elementary school with her too. Yeah. It was that personality of person that said it, you know, Rachel.
Yeah.
Um, I agree with Emily.
I think that they're not as good.
I don't want a whole, um, you know, box full of them.
Like if, if I ordered them, if I order fries and that's all I got, I would be upset every
once in a while though.
It's just, it's just part of life.
It's just, it's just the, it's the valleys.
Yeah.
It's the valleys you have to endure for the hills of the honey roasted barbecue,
the normal, like very crispy, great waffle fries,
and the Chick-fil-A spicy chicken sandwich with pepper jack cheese.
Sometimes you just got to get back on that donkey and just ride out of town
and just know like, hey, I'll come back tomorrow and things will be better.
That's right.
We're definitely going to go see Mr. James after this and I'm pretty excited.
Oh, yeah.
It is 1.03 p.m. We better hustle out of here afterwards. I've had
one bowl of cereal. I'm a hungry boy. I haven't. Oh no, I had some cereal this morning, but I got
up early so I am hungry as well. Um, thank you, Hannah. Yeah. Thanks Hannah. Hannah Smulbridge
Bar. Hey Peter. Hey Brad. Um, my name is Heather Lee. I live in Jacksonville, Florida and I'm a
big fan of the podcast. I think you guys are hilarious, and I would consider myself a just below avid listener.
So I have a question mostly for Pete, but Brad, I always appreciate your opinions.
So I'm 26 and single as a Pringle.
So with this, I'm noticing comes this new rite of passage, if you will, where it seems
like everyone in my life
above the age of 55, no matter how obscure of a relative they are to me, just wants to set me up
with it seems like anyone and everyone. Also, I feel like it's getting worse. I don't even think
they have to know anything about the person anymore. It just could be the random guy who
walks his dog by my aunt's house every day. They think he's the one, apparently.
Last week, my mom volunteered, and Trevor volunteered with her,
and apparently he was the one.
So it seems to be getting worse.
Not sure if this happens to you, Jake, or Brad.
Do you do this to your poor single friends?
That was funny.
That was a good voicemail.
For me, yeah, I think it's pretty well known
that I am a single guy among
most of my friends. So you would probably assume that I get set up more, but all of my friends are
married and aren't exactly running around with like young single women. So it's not really
happening that often. Uh, every now and then people try to set me up. Most of the time it
doesn't go great. Uh, several months ago, one of my friends set me up with a chief cheerleader. That was
awesome. That doesn't normally happen. Uh, so that was fun. Um, but yeah, it really doesn't
happen that often to me. Although I can kind of like resonate with what you're saying. It's funny.
It just like, I think it's more like my grandparents. They're just like, yeah, there's
a girl that goes to our church. You know, you should talk to her. Like, do you know anything
about her? Nope. Just seen her from across the pews. She looks cute.
You know, it doesn't take much to get set up with them.
Maybe like the older generation, like doesn't realize how easy it is to connect with people these days.
And so they think like, oh, you're not married.
Oh man, you need to have help finding somebody.
Let me be the bridge to kind of connect you.
Like you can, you tell me somebody's first name.
It could be as obscure as, you know, whatever, Jehoshaphat.
Penelope.
And I'll find a Jehoshaphat out there in Kansas City.
Like there's one out there that you could, you know, yeah, Penelope, sure, whatever.
Akbala.
Persephone.
I was trying to think of that one that we talked about.
Yeah, exactly.
Find Persephone.
And yeah, there's probably three in Overland Park alone.
Persephone.
Anyway, that's a fun.
I don't, I'm kind of like what you're saying.
I don't really set people up because I don't have that many people to set up. We have single friends. Like
whenever we first got married, especially we only hung out with single people. You guys were the
only married people there for a while, which was great because we lived single quote unquote lives
with our flexibility and it was great. They were swingers. Um, no, no, no, no. Only at the park,
only at the park and only, only in the kids one where you're like are very locked in and, uh, secure. Do we swing? Uh, no. Um, yeah, but, but all our single friends was
like, no, that's weird to like try to set you up with you. Cause you guys were already hanging out
together. So anyway, good questions. Hey Jake. Hey Brad, this is Taylor. Um, I'm the person that
knew Hannah from title boxing company. Sorry that I gave you kind of celebrity status there, Jake. Hey, Brad. This is Taylor. I'm the person that knew Hannah from Title Boxing Company.
Sorry that I gave you kind of celebrity status there, Jake, but I hope it's all still going well with boxing.
I don't happen to drive a green car, so I apologize about that.
And I don't happen to have a question either, but I do have some information that I thought you might want to know,
since you're wonderful milk enthusiasts living in the Kansas city area. Um, there is a dairy that I grew up nearby
in Northwest Missouri. Sorry. It's not Kansas, Brad called Chateau dairy, and they make specialty
flavors of milk. And a couple of years ago when the Royals went to the world series, they had a
Royals flavor. So I thought they might have a chief's flavor since they went to the super bowl.
I can't imagine why they wouldn't. Um, but i thought you might want to track it down and try it out and
let us know how that goes oh that got cut off i think dang but it's our first voice memo milk
suggestion i always knew there would be one eventually yeah we finally got it we we sat
down and put some smart goals on a sheet and And we said, hey, we really want some food suggestions.
And they're like, well, that's not specific enough.
And like, well, okay, in our first year of podcasting,
I would like a voice memo that suggests milk.
Okay, we did it.
We did it.
Smart goal.
Chateau is famous around Kansas City.
It's fire.
And it's so good.
Yeah.
I don't know how that didn't come up last week.
Because most people, like, I've got, as you know, I've got friends coming in town this weekend. I'm taking
them to get some Chateau milk. You guys, they've got, I don't think a lot of Kansas city people
are like, Oh, Oh, you're from out of town. Let me have you try this milk. No, not barbecue.
Not like the sprint center, the rural run memorial. Like, no, we're going to get milk.
But it really, it's like in my top three, like I want to make sure you had this milk before we
leave Kansas city. Cause they have, it sounds kind of disgusting at first, but they have root
beer milk, which is my personal favorite it tastes like the
end of a root beer float and that's how you have to describe it and it's amazing be disgusted by
it anymore yeah it's seriously so good cookies and cream milk is also pretty decent coffee milk
they got coffee milk they've got uh what's the lime green one they've got a cotton candy one
oh I think mint chocolate chip they mint chocolate oh I didn't know that yeah that's like the green
looking one oh they did make so she asked about the Chiefs one. They had made a Chiefs one whenever Mahomes won the MVP last year.
It was like red and it was like a limited time run or whatever.
I don't know if they've made one for the Super Bowl or not.
I haven't seen.
But then again, there's been so many, obviously so many merchandise opportunities.
So maybe they're not quite as, they're not standing out quite as much.
Maybe they're making it and we just don't know about it.
I was at McLean's Market last week where they stock Chateau milk.
Did not see any red milk.
Saw brown milk and white milk.
Yeah.
But thank you for the milk suggestion.
Quality milk is just the best.
Yeah.
Hey,
what's up Jake and Brad?
It's your boy JC from Nashville,
Tennessee.
Oh,
huge fan of the podcast.
You're going to love this.
I got to say after hearing Brad sweet,
succulent vocals on that ghost runners intro song last week,
I had to go ahead and do my own cover of it.
Hope you enjoy.
What?
Yeah, baby.
This is the Ghost Runners Podcast.
The auto-tune.
This is the Ghost Runners Podcast.
Check this out.
Hey!
They can whip this up by, like, Tuesday.
This is the Ghost Runners Podcast.
This is the Ghost Runners Podcast.
Hey, girl.
Are you the green sauce at Chipotle?
Ghost Runners.
No way.
Isn't that awesome?
That was amazing.
He emailed that to me personally.
It was just like, hey, thought you might enjoy this.
That was awesome.
I've been hanging on to it all week.
Do you know anything?
Do you know him?
No.
I thought if there might have been something in the, I want to say there's something in
the email that was like, hey, I responding to your DM.
Here's the email.
I was like,
I don't even talk to this guy.
So maybe you DM them from our ghost runners account.
And then he emailed me.
I don't know.
Maybe either way that file was attached.
He's from Nashville.
So you always assume like,
Oh,
that guy's musical.
He's very talented.
That was actually true about him.
That was crazy.
Well,
the crazy thing is that we took a beat that one of our other fans sent us
and they had the same first name.
So it's very confusing.
Josh on Josh Action.
No, no.
This guy.
No, Caleb was the other guy's name.
Oh, wait.
Someone else named Josh emailed me.
Wait.
Oh.
Uh-oh.
Crap.
I've had multiple.
Okay.
I need to figure this out in my emails later.
Okay.
Okay.
Caleb is our beat maker.
Caleb made the beat.
And then we added the music onto it.
And then somebody parodied that.
It's just crazy to me.
So now someone,
someone needs to get the,
like the stems from like the instrumental from Josh.
And then now make your own lyrics.
It's like a musical telephone.
Yes.
Yes.
So,
so if you're out there and you know how to do that,
that was so fun.
I,
I loved that so much.
I told Isaac,
it was like Tuesday afternoon or something. And I got that. And I was like, we already got our first cover of our theme song. He's like, what?. I told Isaac, it was like Tuesday afternoon or something.
I got that and I was like,
we already got our first cover of our theme song.
He's like, what?
And I was like, this is awesome.
We have fans.
That's so cool.
You get to a point and people do stuff like that.
It's so cool.
Like I would be so content.
Well, this could be our last episode.
I'm done.
We did it.
We got a milk suggestion and someone covered our theme song.
We're good.
This is it.
Peace out.
Peace out seacrest
um no i would be so content but maybe not for caleb's sake because he worked hard on that beat
but i'd be so content like never having my own voice in the uh you know theme song again we'll
take care of it always had cool uh you know covers like that that's so fun yeah i think the point of
a theme song is just to give it something fun to start an episode with so as long as it's fun and cheery oh man sure that's so fun thank you for
that josh hey brad and jake hey jake and brad hey ghost runners all the greetings to you my name is
jeff i'm from wilmore kentucky and i really love your show it always uh brightens up my monday
commute i have to drive two hours uh for. This is one hour each way on Monday.
So your show really helps with that too.
I just want to say when you guys were talking about libraries,
I was actually on the way to the library,
which is always really cool.
And that happens in our library is amazing.
It has a recording studio.
You can like get sewing machines and do 3d printing and all that kind of
stuff is really neat.
And then I want to ask you a few rapid-fire questions.
You can answer as many or as few as you want.
Brad, have people ever told you that you sound like Mark Driscoll?
Because you do.
For both of you, what's your Chipotle order?
And then what are your pickup basketball pet peeves?
And who do you model your game off of?
Thanks for all you do.
Keep up the good work.
Peace. Rapid-fire. Mark Driscoll. Never been all you do. Keep up the good work. Peace.
Rapid fire. Mark Driscoll. Never been compared to him. Tripoli order. I would like a bowl. Can I
get double rice and taco tortillas on the side? And then can I get chicken, no beans, sour cream,
cheese, extra pico de gallo. Hi, can I get a burrito please? Yes, I will take chicken, no beans,
brown rice, some queso, please.
And then can I just have a little bit of pico de gallo?
Thank you.
Yes, that's perfect.
And then I'll have some lettuce, please.
And that's for here.
And I'll take a large drink with that as well.
Thank you.
Pick up basketball pet peeves.
One of them is the guy who always thinks there's a fast break opportunity.
There's four guys back on defense.
There's one guy down there and you just chuck it down there. Best case scenario, the guy catches the ball and there's four guys four guys back on defense there's one guy down there and you just chuck it down there best case scenario the guy catches the ball and there's four guys on him
worst case scenario the ball is turned over yeah you never want to take a shot with no rebounders
that's like an easy rule of basketball go pass he's open it's like i mean yeah but you have to
throw the ball down there it's gonna take a while that sounds like more like just like a basketball
pet peeve yeah i guess it happens specifically in pickup basketball with somebody I'm thinking of.
But, oh, okay.
I've been playing a lot of pickup ball lately.
I could probably think of more if I had time to think about them.
But one that I've always hated is when you go to check the ball and they roll it to you.
That happens so often.
I hate that.
Does it?
So, I mean, granted, I'm probably more often.
That's a bad move.
Like the point guard.
So I'm guarding the guy checking in.
I hate the roll. Stop rolling me the ball. Oh the ball. I know they don't mean to be disrespectful,
but sometimes they might be. And it just, why just, it's so easy to toss me the ball. Yeah.
Why make me bend over for it? That happens so often drives me nuts. Another thing is when it's
not that questionable of a call and they'll say, shoot for it. Like, no, I'm saying he was out of
bounds. Yeah. Shoot for it. No, no, no.
It's out of bounds.
Yeah.
Okay, well, if you think so, then shoot for it.
Okay, why don't we do this for every call
we're going to make all game then,
if this is the policy?
Or the guy that misses every,
every time he misses, he calls a foul.
Or it says and one when he like,
and then like, oh, he wants a foul?
Nah.
Okay, well, don't say and one then, dingus.
I kind of do that.
I kind of do some of those things to joke around about the people that are...
Hey, and one.
When you're...
Hey.
Like, you've done that when I'll be driving and you're at the three-point line.
Oh, and one.
Oh, I do it all the time.
I'm like, I didn't get fouled.
You don't have to say that.
I just missed the shot.
Oh, yeah.
I'm probably on some pet peeve list for people because I talk a decent amount just because I'm having fun out there.
Oh, yeah.
I love talking to people.
Yeah.
Yeah.
You and I always like have a little more lighthearted basketball than most of the people we play with.
Love.
Shout out Garrett Gibson.
Listen to the podcast.
Probably my favorite guy to play with because he can like we can both have a really good time and remain competitive.
And I think some people it's kind of a switch.
You turn on or off.
So Garrett's your favorite person
to play with?
So,
although last night though,
in our game,
you sent me a great screen
out to the wing
and as I was catching
and shooting the ball,
I said,
oh Brad,
great screen.
Yeah, baby.
And then drilled a three.
I felt like I was like,
I felt like I was like
the Berlin Wall.
The Great Wall of China out there.
get out of here.
Like,
I felt like I just like
blocked two guys from you.
Yeah,
and yeah.
And I was,
I pointed to you too. I was like, Jake's open. Yeah. Pass to him. Berlin's going up. Yeah, I felt like I just like blocked two guys from you. Yeah. And yeah, it was, I appointed you too.
I was like,
Jake's open.
Yeah.
Pass to him.
Berlin's going up.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I'm like catching and shooting Brad.
Great screen too.
I love it.
And then it went in and it felt great.
Who do I model my game after?
I got a one word for you.
Cadillac.
No,
I'm so sorry.
Cadillac.
The Auburn running back.
Yes.
I'm a big,
I'm a big Auburn guy.
Bo Jackson was my guy.
You know,
he's a Royal.
No, not Cadillac. I have one car brand and one, Bo Jackson was my guy. You know, he's a royal.
No, not Catalan.
I have one car brand and one old running back.
Rewind, edit this.
I got one word for you.
Escalade is my answer.
I meant Escalade, the old N1 mixtape player.
Oh, I forgot about them. I loved the future.
He was huge.
He was huge and he was a baller.
That's what I want to be.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I would say.
Either that or Michael Jordan.
Or my two that I really.
I would say Jack Black or maybe Tom Cruise.
Maybe Tom Cruise.
Jason Williams is always my favorite player growing up.
So I'm sure it's somewhat modeled after him.
You got some Steve Nash in you.
Yeah, dude.
It's kind of great.
Steve Nash won like multiple mvps
he did kind of think of him as just like flashy point guard but he like he puts the points up
he was good pretty impressive he was very good someone uh oh this is kind of fun story for
pickup basketball just while we're on the topic real quick roommate greg found out about a spot
to play last sunday night um and so i went and played there and there's like 24 guys show up so
we're at kcc so we go into their ox gym and their and there's like 24 guys show up. So we're at KCC.
So we go into their ox gym and their main gym.
So like rotating guys at crazy, it's pretty fun, but you still don't want to lose because
you have to sit out first game.
We start, we're down like seven to one and we've been playing like 10 minutes.
So it's like, wow, we really have not scored.
Like kind of even both teams at this point have not scored.
I'm like, gosh, it's going to be my team all night.
This is kind of sucks.
This is lame.
Can't get into rhythm.
And then we come back, we play to lame can't get into rhythm and then we
come back we play to 11 we win that game and then win every game for the next two hours
we went nine it was awesome that's awesome it was so much fun that was like that time we went
to hy-vee and we just ran the court for a long time so sick just didn't stop playing didn't
have to leave the court there's a fun pickup basketball quick uh quick brag it's not even
humble brag sometimes people say that i'm, no, you're just bragging.
So I'm just saying.
It's just bragging without like wanting to admit you're bragging.
Yeah.
Bragging.
Yeah.
I'm bragging and acknowledging it.
I had one of those moments where someone said, where'd you play college ball at?
And I got to say nowhere, but thank you.
This is, this is a huge confidence booster.
So thank you.
Like, oh, you must've gone to a big school.
So you couldn't make it there.
It's like, no, no, no.
Small Baptist didn't even, didn't even play there.
Go Bearcats.
Dang, I want to play on Sundays.
I have youth group, and if I don't have youth group, then Catherine has youth group.
Oh.
And so I have to watch the darn daughter.
Hattie?
Yeah.
Okay.
I figured that's who you're talking about.
Yeah.
Yeah, dude.
Man, I want to do that.
Wednesday nights, open mic. Sunday nights, pick up ball. Start Yeah. Yeah, dude. Man, I want to do that. Wednesday nights, open mic.
Sunday nights, pick up ball.
Start hanging out more, dude.
Stop spending time with things that you care about.
I should really go Catholic.
I should really go Catholic.
Okay, I think we got more.
Hey, y'all.
My name's Michelle.
I'm from South Texas.
I love the podcast and have been listening since mid-January.
I'm all caught up on all the episodes and felt it was time to leave y'all a voice
memo since the challenge was issued this week to drivers of four wheeled green
colored vehicles.
There we go.
Right now though,
that that's a little bit of a stretch for me because while I haven't driven my
green Camry since the engine went out in October,
I do still own the car.
So fingers crossed.
It still counts, right?
Totally.
Anyway, so my question for y'all is do either of y'all have any good remedies for getting rid of the hiccups?
Whenever I get them, they can last for up to a half hour.
When they finally go away, they come back again at least two more times within the next 24 hours. And it's, it's a little
embarrassing to be a grown adult hiccuping like a milk drunk four month old. So any, any tips would
be appreciated. Thanks guys. Oh my gosh. That's so funny that she asked that. Brad had the cups
last night. I did. I cupped hard last night and, and it's exactly like what she was explaining.
Like they went away and then I would get
them again. And then they went away when I went home and I started talking to Catherine and I
started getting them again. It's more frustrating when they come back. And guess what? What? This
morning I get up to go to the bathroom, hiccups. Oh, the cups are back. They were very short that
time, short stint, but still. My explanation for why I think I got them is because I played basketball last night.
We had our pickup game or rec league game.
And I was feeling pretty short, you know, shortness of breath, which I think is there's something that's got to do with the air.
And that's why hiccups happen, right?
Probably.
Because usually it's like when you laugh really hard, so you're inhaling a lot i don't really know exactly what it is okay something
scientific and like the way you get rid of them potentially is to hold your breath or whatever i
don't know but i was sucking wind and then i went from there to um the chain restaurant mcdonald's
and had a mcdonald's 70 30 coke diet coke Coke. And, um, so there's lots of bubbles with
the air. And I think that just contributed to it. I don't know. Yeah. I don't think she was asking,
how do I get hiccups? No, but that's just why I'm saying, but I'm saying like maybe a way to get rid
of your hiccups is, Oh, limit potential. If you're doing those things, or if you have similar things
going on in your life, um, the way to get rid of hiccups is a simple one. So you said you have a car. You're going to need that. You're going to
need that. You're going to want to stand on top of the hood of the car. And just kind of start
bouncing a little bit. Get like your stomach kind of bouncing, get the air inside your stomach.
Make sure the shocks on the car are working and make sure you're also probably wearing Nike
shocks. You would be surprised. Yeah, it's going to help. And then you just want to hum a native tune, whatever that is.
Kumbaya works.
Kumbaya.
Star Spangled Banner is a decent one.
Anything from the Prince of Egypt soundtrack will work.
Yeah.
Diana Ross is a pretty popular pick for this.
So you start humming, and then what you really need to do is shock your body and your stomach. So we're going to do is if you've ever been on like a trampoline doing tricks, it's
called a bottom drop. So you, you stop just in a, in a moment's instance, you stop, uh, bouncing,
you drop your feet from out from under you and just boom, bottom goes on the top of the car.
You sit on that thing, bottom to the top, bottom of the top and you just kind of sit there, right?
And then you think about you do the alphabet backwards do the alphabet
X and then think about like the worst trauma you've ever gone through in your entire life and can almost guarantee you after that
Won't have the cops. Yeah, there's no way there's no way you're singing Diana Ross doing the bottom drop doing the alphabet and then trauma
So it's so they call it alphabet, and then trauma. So
they call it the backwards bet trauma. Yes. On top. You can Google it, but why you don't need
to now, because we just told you everything about it. Google is going to tell you the exact same
thing we just did. Yeah. So that's how you do it. Do all that. Get some Nike shocks, have some
songs in mind, and then bottom drop. Yeah. And yeah, you'll get rocks. Yeah. So thank you for
that. Shout out South Texas, you know, Corpus Christi in the house.
Yeah.
My friend Carter lives there.
McAllen.
Is that a friend or is that a city?
That's a city.
Cool.
Corpus Christi, I already said it.
South Padre.
All of them.
All those great cities.
Okay.
Thank you guys for all the voice memos.
We always welcome them,
but we especially welcome them this week. If you are left-handed. Yo! If you're left-handed,
you have to leave us a voice memo this week. Should I leave one for myself? That'd be fun.
Okay. Yeah. Maybe you have, yeah, maybe you will. You won't know if it's me or not. I'll disguise my voice. Oh my gosh. An emoji style.
Yeah.
Left-handed.
Let's go.
That means you're more creative anyway.
So they better be good.
Don't let us down.
Yeah.
And you're more likely to be president.
That's right.
So yeah, I hope you guys enjoyed episode 42.
I thought that this was a good one.
This was a fun one for me.
I had fun.
We should do more morning pods.
Yes, maybe so.
Even though-
I always think like, oh, I'm just like feeling it.
I'm more energetic at night. But this has been good. It's late morning pod. Yes. Maybe so. Even though I always think like, Oh, I'm, I'm just like feeling it. I'm more energetic at night,
but this has been good.
It's late morning pod.
Yeah.
Yeah.
So thank you guys for listening.
Brad,
why don't you hit us with a jingle to in this one?
All right.
I got,
I got one.
Boom,
boom,
boom,
boom,
boom,
boom,
boom,
boom.
You keep going on that.
Go,
go.
It's the podcast. You keep going on that. Go, go. Ghost Runners, it's the podcast.
We're going to party like it's the podcast.
Coming out every Monday morning, the podcast.
And you know we are Jake and Brad and we're the podcast.
Find me in the pod all of Monday morning.
We got it.
Yeah.
Thanks, guys.
That was it.
Thanks, guys. And you it. Thanks, guys.
And you know what?
That's freaking true.
That jingle is freaking true.
Yeah, I hope you guys have a good week.
Follow us on Instagram.
Leave us a five-star review.
Go check out our fan page.
They just continue to kill it.
They've got some stuff.
I know you guys can't see it now once you're listening to this,
but the stuff on their story right now,
maiming my grandma, is so funny.
So funny.
They do such an amazing job. Go follow follow them and we will see you next week love you kath
baby keep on dancing like you ain't got a choice Come on, come on, let's get physical Hold up, just a little tighter
Come on, hold up, tell me if you're ready
Come on, baby, keep on dancing
Let's get physical
Hold up, just a little tighter
Come on, hold up, tell me if you're ready
Come on, baby, come on, hold on Tell me if you're ready, come on
Baby, keep on dancing
Let's get physical