Ghostrunners - 93 - Our First Rap Battle
Episode Date: February 15, 2021Would you get three of your fingers removed for 200 million dollars? Are dogs' mouths actually cleaner than humans? Also, what gives you the right? All of these questions and more are answered on this... episode. Go to www.HumbleSalt.co and use code HEYMOM for 10% off ANY order! Become a Patron and get exclusive content from Jake & Brad: https://bit.ly/2XJ1h3y Watch this episode on YouTube: https://bit.ly/3cQSPnw Follow us on Instagram: http://bit.ly/33WAq4P Leave us a voice memo and ask a question: https://anchor.fm/jake-triplett/message Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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Jake, quick poultry of the week for you to start off the episode hot.
Let's get her married.
What's up with that phrase?
You've been hearing it a lot recently?
Just every single time any girl I know is ever in a wedding party.
Let's get her married.
Let's get her married.
It's just like, that's the most obvious thing you could say.
Like, you pull up to Chipotle and you walk in, you're like, let's get some food.
It's like, yeah, that's why we're
here. Let's get me some rice. Yeah. Yeah. Yo church. Hey, let's worship the Lord. Okay. Of
course. Yes. Do you feel it? Do we feel it? Do we feel it? Yeah. It's a, it's rampant. Yeah.
In wedding culture. Like let's go to home. You go to home Depot. All right, let's build some stuff.
It's like, yeah, yeah. Let's get her married. I just don't say it. Don't say it. What are some new phrases we can say?
How are they the ones getting, they, I'll be honest, like, let's just say, let's just say
legally, they don't need to be there at all. They don't, they don't do anything for the marriage.
We need one minister and one witness, I think. Right. If the, if the officiant is the one saying,
let's get her married I understand that
that yeah is what you're there for that'd be weird if it's like a 55 year old guy on his
Instagram story like posting this picture of this girl and like her pajamas and like getting her
makeup done like let's get her married let's get her married he's like using the wedding hashtag
like ball becomes a bell he's in his like little kimono with the Ghost Brothers Podcast.
Go for a podcast.
Brad, we're in the basement, so let's do a podcast.
Oh, let's get this podcast going.
Let's do a podcast.
Episode 93.
Wow. I'm pretty sure ever almost every time these days every time you say the number i'm always like wow 93 that's a lot i
don't think about it when i say the number but recently i was talking to someone i was like oh
you have a podcast that's cool how many episodes you've been doing like 37 i was like oh wow that's
awesome yeah like you've been doing it for like right good for you yeah like 37 weeks in a row
yeah and then i didn't say it but i, wow, we have like almost three times.
That's a long time. Yeah. It's a long time to do anything. So it was fun. We recorded last night
as well for the Patreons. Yeah. Back to back, back to back. We ran it back too soon. Dang it.
Yeah. Sorry. Back to back vibes. but we did record a patreon episode yesterday with scott
and scott was like i can see why you do this all the time that was really fun this is so easy
you're like right yeah it's no problem it was it was really easy i mean yeah last night we just
answered questions that people sent into us for the most part but it was so easy because it was
scott and like it was like yeah it's the same reason that's easy with you. And the reason that we could probably do
five of these a week, if we really wanted to, it's like, we're just hanging out.
We're just talking. Yeah. But yeah, check it out. If you haven't joined our Patreon,
it's patreon.com backslash ghost runners, uh, pay us a little bit each month and you get some bonus,
uh, content. Yeah. So yeah, Scott's episode was good. We both said some jokes. We probably
would normally say on the main episode, it was PG 13 at times. Yeah. There was one time I was like,
ah, whoops, but that's okay. I mean, if you're, if you're on Patreon comment,
which one you think I'm talking about, which word Brad said that he probably should.
It was whatever. Uh, it was a good time though. Uh, speaking of words, you shouldn't say I saw
something on one of my favorite websites,
Facebook.com.
Oh, yeah.
The Face...
What is it?
Facebook's.
I can't even remember.
The Face...
FaceTime.
FaceTime.
FaceTime's.com.
Mm-hmm.
And someone shared something with someone else and said, Cheryl, you'll love this.
Cheryl?
Yeah.
Hey, Cheryl.
You're going to love this one.
And Cheryl did love it.
And it says, the handbook for alternative cuss words and uh okay looks like there's about 60 on it Brad I'm gonna text it to
you now um I think we should just uh give each other some some scenes where we might have to
say a cuss word but now we're gonna use this new handbook that Cheryl's gonna love oh this is
awesome so Brad uh oh Brad I don't know that's got a short fuse on that firework you better be
careful whoa good grief good grief good grief uh that wasn't exasperated there's different
categories you have labels exasperated i'm not having it okay i don't buy it i'm going to use
one from i'm not having it oh you, you are? Yeah. Yeah. Okay.
Hey, did you know that burger you're eating is actually made out of straight tofu?
Oh, bull twinkies.
I didn't know.
That's a fun one.
I haven't read.
Yeah.
I had no idea bull twinkies was even on here.
All right.
Your turn.
Oh, what are the labels?
A son of a. That's kind of fun. Yeah. Oh, wow. These are good.
Yeah. I didn't really look at this either
before we just started. Okay. Oh,
Brad. Wait, what? I don't even know
what you just gave me. I think I'm about to do the same one. That's fine.
Okay. Oh, Brad, I thought you were allergic to peanut butter. Be careful.
Whoa.
Rassafrassa. Passafrassa.
Yeah. It's got peanuts
in it.
I don't know about that one. Oh, okay.
The Chiefs are in the Super Bowl.
They've had the best offense all year long.
No way did they just pee down their leg and lose this game to Tom Brady,
who's 55 years old.
Oh.
And then three hours later, oh, no, the Chiefs lost to Tom Brady.
Gosh.
I'm not having it.
In fact, I'm sucking eggs.
Sucking eggs.
Oh, that sounds like, oh, don't do that.
Or maybe it's, this sucks eggs.
Dang, this sucks eggs.
I mean, this sucks.
Gosh, this sucks eggs.
This sucks unfertilized eggs.
This sucks.
Golly, hard boil my eggs.
This sucks my eggs.
Yeah.
Oh, Brad, be careful.
Don't run on the pool deck.
Don't run on the pool deck.
It's against the rules.
Son of a Baptist preacher.
Whoa, hey, hey.
Jake, what are you doing?
Wake up.
We're going to be late.
We're going to be late for church.
Oh, horse feathers.
We're always late.
Did I use that one right?
There's a horse category. Horse, yeah. Horse feathers. We're always late Did I use that one right? There's a horse category for horse. Yeah horse feathers
Okay. Oh, there's one called the triple play. Give me give me some I'll do the triple play
Okay, oh
Oh Brad what I
What oh
Brad don't get too close What? Uh-oh, Brad.
Don't get too close.
Whoa!
Bob say it!
Oh, because there's an alligator in there.
Pat Sajak!
And he's hangry.
Alex Trebek.
Oh, R.I.P.
This was written a while back. Yeah, this is before him.
All right, that's funny.
Yeah.
You want more?
We're good.
No, I think that's good
they get the point
that's funny
alternative cuss words
field tested
and mother approved
that's nice
that's true
mom you're welcome
don't listen to
the patreon episode
but this one's just fine
great caesar's ghost
that's one of my
favorite ones that
I just now saw
that was a good one
um
dad blame it
shucky darn
dad blame it
dad gum it dad blast it dad nab it dad it. Shucky darn. Dad, blame it. Dad, gum it.
Dad, blast it.
Dad, nab it.
Dad, burn it.
Shucky darn.
Yeah.
Dad, blast it's good.
Um, Brad, how's your week?
Um, it was fine.
It's been good.
It's actually been, it's been good.
It's been a little bit busy.
Um, I think I haven't been home any night for like five nights.
Wow.
Yeah. It's a lot of nights. Absent father. Yeah, I do. I kind any night for like five nights. Wow. Yeah, that's a lot of nights in a row.
Absent father.
Yeah, I do.
I kind of feel that a little bit.
I've tried to see them a decent amount during the day, but that's not true.
I was home on Sunday night, but obviously we were very busy Sunday night
watching the Super Bowl.
Chiefs loss, that was too bad, but we had some people over.
It was fun.
Yeah.
It was about as fun as it could be for how boring or not, how, how not eventful that
game was for us.
Yeah.
Harrison was telling me, have you heard about this?
Like him and Gunnar, you know, we're watching over their plays.
They just like turned it on mute for like the entire third and fourth quarter.
It just sat in silence.
I was like, Oh, that sucks eggs.
Yeah, that does.
We still had fun.
Like the game wasn't going great, but we still laughed.
I was proud of how we handled it.
You, would you agree?
Oh yeah.
I mean, for the most part, we were, we were irked oh but it was still fine but
by the end of it yeah by the end of it we were like joking around like like i think i said like
gosh it's no fun when tony romo announces your games and you're losing because everything he
says is right yeah but you're just frustrated by it like but i was it was just like kind of
light-hearted like yeah it's just no it was just hard to watch but it was just like we still made
it to the super bowl yeah and it's like i think it was just hard to watch, but it was just like, we still made it to the Superbowl. Yeah. And it's like, I think it's one of those things where,
yeah, a, we won last year. So it's like, it's not like, oh, we're never going to win. We keep
losing in Superbowl B we have Patrick Mahomes for 15 more years. Yeah. We're going to get back.
We're fine. We're going to get back next year. I'm always going to believe we're going to go
to the Superbowl and I don't know favorites in Vegas right now go to the Super Bowl. And I don't know. We're the favorites in Vegas right now. Of course.
Yeah.
And I don't know when we're not going to be the favorites.
Like, what's it going to take?
I don't know.
Like, obviously, like another better team, but.
Maybe a new rule.
Yeah.
You got to run it once every four downs.
What if?
What if, dude?
But yeah, Super Bowl was obviously disappointing.
Thanks for all the ghosties out there that hollered at us and said, we were rooting for
the chiefs.
We don't, it was so, it's so funny when you hear like, we don't really care about football,
but we were rooting for the chiefs for you guys.
And it's like, that's cool.
Like, that's pretty fun.
What's more fun.
Those DMS or the, the other like few DMS we got were like, man, it must suck to be you
guys right now.
Cause those were cool too.
It was fun to get those.
Yeah.
I was just like, well, I can't imagine what you guys are going through man they didn't they got whooped it's like wow they did
yeah you can't you can't deny it uh i like the first ones better though to answer your question
but yeah it's fun because the chiefs are just a small market team so it's cool like
like for people to be fans outside of just us, Canton City people. And obviously Patrick Mahomes is making a big difference there.
But anyway, went to KU game Monday, which was fun with my dad.
Basketball?
Yeah, basketball.
Please clarify.
And they won.
But it was like KU's having a pretty rough season subjectively for them.
They're out of the top 25 for the first time since 1994 or something like that.
Oh, wow.
They had the longest streak ever.
But they won, so I think they're're gonna go back in the top 25 but like like first half was kind of rough and
i literally like put on my instagram story like i need this i need this like please um kind of
like michael scott when he's you've been instagramming a lot i've been trying to just
like hey just throw it oh you're talking about my posts. Yeah. Yeah. Dude. McLean Mondays. You're scheduling posts. Um, yeah, yeah. I've been trying to do
every Monday. I try to post for like the rest of the week and I'm trying to do three times a day
because three times, three times a day, I try to do a morning and afternoon and a night. So,
so the morning one, here's how, here's my marketing mind. And it's probably just fiddle faddle. It's probably, um, it's probably
horse patootie. Yeah. Yeah. Um, but, uh, I, I try to like think about people's days, especially
like the average corporate person. So I try to post one at like seven o'clock when it's like
they started their day. Really? I just try to do it around poop schedules to be honest. Okay. So
like you start your day, you're sitting on the John and you're looking at your phone, scrolling through, sitting on your tuchus and then, Hey, like around one 32 o'clock,
you know, during the day you might, you might be a little bit lagging. You might be a little
bit tired after lunch. You got those, those after lunch tiredness fatigues. And so, okay.
Yeah. It's like a thing in corporate, if you're out there in the corporate world, I think it's
like, it really is like very nonproductive time. Okay. And so I post then it's like a thing in corporate. If you're out there in the corporate world, I think it's like, it really is like very
nonproductive time.
Okay.
And so I post then like one 32 o'clock and then I post around nine o'clock every night
ish.
And so like, that's like usually when people are winding down on their phone in their bed,
about to go to bed.
Nice.
Yeah.
So is it working like art?
Yeah, I think so.
I mean, yeah, I'm getting more business than I usually get on in February for sure.
And I think just in general, like last year I was so blessed.
Like I did literally, like I looked at my last marketing post or my last like post on
Facebook and it was before Bo was born.
It was in April.
So I didn't post on Instagram basically for eight plus months.
I'm sorry, on Facebook for eight months.
And yet I still had a lot of business last year. And so it's like, okay,
maybe I should be a better steward of like this business and like do a better job of posting.
I would say if I'm getting, if I'm getting business already, it's like,
why am I not trying harder to like get even more? And so, um, yeah, so it is working.
I'm getting some orders and thanks to all who have ordered. I
made a cutting board this past week that said poultry of the week on it. Did you see that?
No.
Yeah. Um, Abby Marie, I don't know if that's her last name or middle name,
all those girls. Um, Abby Marie ordered it for her sister and it was for her sister's birthday.
Shout out to Abby Marie's sister. I believe her name is Liz.
Liz.
Full name's Elizabeth though.
Yes. They call her Liz. Lizzy. Yeah. Um, and it was Lizzie's birthday. And so she wanted a cutting board. And so I had
a chicken on it and it says poultry of the week. Nice. Yeah. It's pretty fun. That's cool. Um,
anyway, lots of stuff going on. Nothing too like wild and crazy. Iwana tonight, you know,
yeah. Patreon last night. Um, but yeah, just, just a good week. It's been fun.
Isaac said he got an order today.
Someone wanted like a 17 by 38 cutting board that was going to stay outdoors permanently.
And he was like, I'm pretty confused by this.
I can't even imagine what you need that large of a cutting board for that always stays outdoors.
I guess they have an outdoor kitchen maybe.
That's a thing these days.
But yeah, that's, that's huge. And a bad idea. I would love when like wealthy Americans try to take what like civilization has done and just like go backwards with it. Right. Like let's go camping. Let's have like an outdoor television.
Yeah. Outdoor kitchen. Yeah. Yeah. Like, like you're good inside. You don't need to have a
pool outside. We've invented air conditioning and heating. It's awesome indoors. It's so awesome in there.
You don't need to take your living situation and
just deconstruct it.
Back out. Reverse engineer that thing.
So I don't know. That's
a huge cutting board. That's what I thought too.
I don't even know anything about
CBs. I mean, it's bigger.
38 inches is bigger than
our desk. That's a big old boy.
A lot to cut. Cool.
Good for him.
So yeah, what's going on with you?
I, um, oh, I got to tell you a story.
I think we mentioned on the Patreon.
What was it?
It was, no, it was when we had a YouTube premiere.
We were talking in the chat with everyone in there about how my shower doesn't work,
but I don't think we mentioned on the podcast.
You know, I spelled facetious, right?
You get the master bedroom.
My shower has not worked properly the whole time.
It leaks a ton of water into the garage, which is where Isaac's woodworking equipment is,
which is a huge hassle.
If anything, you got the lower end of the deal, having this master bedroom.
Because now I just share a shower with Isaac and Harrison when they let me.
How many times a week?
Do they let me?
Yeah.
Twice.
Okay.
Good for them. But if they're not home then
i'll sneak in there oh you do yeah it's fun good it's real nice um so you know i've been trying to
get this company to come out and they took forever and i finally got to come out and then harrison
isaac got covid so they had to wait like another two weeks they finally came out this past week
for the first time without letting me know but hey luckily isaac and i were home we had no idea
someone just like home isaac's like are you expecting anyone like expecting anyone this is the milk
man i mean the 60s no i'm not expecting anyone right ever and so this guy comes in he's like
hey i'm here to uh fix your shower i go awesome and uh he's like where's that like here i'll
come show it to you it's in my bedroom back here and i went ahead and uh quickly like taken off the
shower curtain for him okay like you get in there and you know good for you yeah that was nice a
thoughtful thing uh-huh and he's like okay great he's like so where's it
leaking I'm kind of showing him he's like all right let me um I'm gonna take
off the shower head here while you're in here why you go ahead and hold this so
I'm like all right am I like a part of this oh yeah my like yeah the assistant
uh-huh to the repairman and next thing you know my hands
are full i'm having to set stuff down on the sink he's still handing me stuff i'm like oh i'm in
this like i'm a part of this now yeah you are yeah getting the copay for this he is taking off the
shower head he's taken off even like the the handle or whatever like anything that was exposed
is now gone he's taking it all off it's just a pipe coming from behind my wall. Okay. And so when it shoots water out, I mean, it is going everywhere, but he's checking
to see what is happening with the leak. So he's like, all right, why don't you run down and see
if it's leaking? I run down to the garage, come back. Yeah, it's leaking. How bad? I'm like,
kind of bad. He's like, yeah, what's my scale here? You're kind of the plumber, right? And so
then he's like, well, let me go look at it. So then he runs down. And so i'm just chilling with the water we do this several times so i'm like i was really planning on
like doing some stuff today but i guess i'm fixing the shower with this guy does that like stuff like
that happens to me every once in a while and i think what is like why am i here how did i get
here and like how much would it take for me to get out of this probably not much but it just seems
awkward right do you like you're like if you were just like hey actually i got some stuff i need to
do do you mind like doing this yourself? Like,
I don't feel like he would say no. You're getting paid. Right. And I'm not right. Right. So like
I can go to whatever I want. Yeah. I think, yeah. Like what would he say if I was just like,
I don't want to do this. Yeah. I don't know how you would handle it. And so we're just things in
your hand. Yeah. I don't want to do this going back and forth. We're fixing the shower together.
Um, and then he really wants to see, he's got this theory that like, wait, maybe it's not
leaking from the shower.
Maybe there's already water in your ceiling and it's just falling down.
When I turn the shower on, he's like, let's leave the shower running for a while and let's
just watch the water.
Meanwhile, I forgot this part.
Isaac is in the middle of spraying paint on a kennel. Okay. Which is a process.
And this was like his quadruple dog kennel.
Humongous.
Take up the whole garage.
Right.
Paints kind of spraying everywhere.
So now Isaac has to like stop spraying.
Yeah.
So we're all just the three of us just watching water trickle down into the thing.
Eventually.
We got a name for this plumber.
Let's call him Clint.
Let's call him Clint.
Let's call him Clint.
The towel is damp now.
It's like soaked.
So now we're
like moving buckets this guy does not seem to mind that we're like having to like get new things
yeah under this drain and isaac's in the back of my head i'm thinking my shower curtain is off like
water is going everywhere in my shower and sure enough yeah i get back to my bathroom and there's
just water everywhere like to the toilet like my um the thing you stand on like the whatever
here what's that thing called shower oh yeah carpet the shower mats the yeah yeah shower carpet i think it's what it's called
yeah it's just soaked uh it's like dripping and it was just like really weirdly inconsiderate
and he leaves he's like yeah that thing's leaking i'm like i know i know it's leaking that's let's get let's that's like let's
get her married of the plumbing game what that's all he said he was like he was so confident though
like i gotta give it to him he knew it was leaking and i gotta give it to me because i knew it was
six weeks ago when i emailed that to him oh my goodness so he leaves going yeah that's definitely
a leak in your shower and i I'm like, dude, yes.
10 out of 10, sir.
You're right.
He didn't say, here's what we're going to do next.
He was like, I think we might have to.
I thought it was your showerhead.
Oh, that was everything.
He ran to Home Depot.
I've got things in my hand.
He's like, I'm going to run to Home Depot and just go get your new showerhead.
I'm like, OK, OK, I guess I'll just whatever.
And it comes back.
It's not the showerhead.
So he's like, I think it's something behind your pipe.
I,
you know,
hard to say for certain,
but we're having to get someone else out here.
But yeah, I mean,
that's definitely a major leak.
Like I,
this is an email.
So then new guy comes yesterday.
Okay.
Let's call him Tony Hank.
Hank.
Tony Hank,
the famous skateboarder.
Oh yeah.
Tony Hank's pro skater.
Yeah.
First guy to do a 900.
Love Tony Hank.
It's like what you get at the black market. We have Tony Hawk at home. Yeah. famous skateboarder oh yeah Tony Hanks pro skater yeah first guy to do a 900 love Tony Hank it's
like what you get at the black market we have Tony Hawk at home yeah we have Tony Hank pro skater on
Dreamcast for you yeah yeah it's like the Asian knockoff like they almost got it I have Tony Hank
come on and so uh Tony Hank is here and we've had some snow and Tony Hank's boots are great.
He doesn't care.
Just like doesn't care.
Just consolidating the snow into his boots only to be released once he walks on our carpet
and just walking straight into my room.
It's just snow all over his shoes.
Just moisture.
He walks back there.
Same process takes everything off.
And I, it's, this is not made up.
He's like, yeah, I mean, that's pretty serious leak.
And like, I thought you were here.
You were like the serious leak guy.
Yeah, you heard.
You already heard like from the whatever.
Did Clint not tell you?
Yeah, the Washington Post like posted out there like,
serious leak at Jake's house.
We need somebody.
Tony Hanks like, yeah, please.
I'm here for you.
I really thought he was like the guy who was like going to cut into my wall
to like fix
the pipe.
But he left.
Basically, every plumber in Kansas City is phenomenal at diagnosing a leak, but doing
nothing about it.
Just like, yeah.
And that's hard because so like you, you're renting from this big company, like national
company.
So I don't even know my landlord's name.
Yeah.
And that's hard because like they're the ones hiring all these guys.
Like because I have I have a plumber that I love in Kansas city and I could Jerry, his name is Jerry. Great guy.
Jerry Hawk.
McGuire.
Jerry McQuire.
Jerry Mc, yeah. McQuire. Yeah. And like, he's awesome. But I, like, I couldn't just send,
maybe, maybe you could be like, Hey, can I, can I bring a guy out? And then you pay him back? Like,
Can I get Jerry?
Jerry's awesome. Like Jerry would, Jerry would probably say like, Hey, you have a leak. And he'd be like, yeah,
we know that from the other guys. And he's like, okay, here's what I would do to fix it.
We have a comma. Yes. And I am going to fix it today. Put a comma there instead of a period.
Yeah. Yeah. He's more of a two independent variables separated by a common. And yes,
that's Jerry's thing. Yeah. Grammar freak. Okay. So, um, that's pretty much the
whole story. It's just, I've had two different guys come. Both of them have left telling me
what I told them in the email. So it's time for a Karen shutterstock thing right now. Okay. I need
to get busy. This is, this is absolutely valid to be like, Hey, you know, we're paying for two
bathrooms. We're paying for this. And instead we've, we've spent over two months now. Like
you've been there, well. Almost.
No, yeah.
Yeah, you moved in January 1st.
So, like, yeah.
By the time it's getting fixed, it might be two months.
And it's like, we spent two months without this thing.
It's reasonable for us to get a discount on this rent.
On, yeah.
Like, that's, and they should be like, yeah, you're right.
Like, there's no arguing that. And then if they say no, then I say, well.
Well, we're moving out.
And Isaac will be like, what?
I just got situated at the shop.
My shower is great.
Village Woodworks.
Yeah.
Oh, man.
Anything else fun with the roommates?
Any new trends?
You guys still high fiving before bed?
We haven't high fived in like a week, probably.
But we're still getting after it in the Instant Pot.
We need to talk about the Instagram or the YouTube live happenings that happened.
Yeah, Harrison just doing push-ups everywhere?
Everywhere.
Hundreds of them.
That was just, as we were, like we did like the premiere on YouTube and so we were interacting with people.
And I don't know how it started.
I just started doing push-ups, I think, because I was cold.
Yeah, you're like, or maybe you hadn't done them yet or something.
Yeah, maybe.
So you did some,
and then like Harrison,
Isaac didn't want to be out done.
And then Harrison just got ridiculous and like,
like basically flying squirreled Isaac and like did pushups on the coffee
table.
He did things,
his legs spread out.
Yeah.
They would not be considered ministry safe.
No,
what he did to Isaac.
Luckily he's 18.
Luckily Isaac's legal now.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And then,
yeah, he's just all over the place. At one point I was like, down my computer and you go, Jake, you seen this?, he's 18. Luckily, Isaac's legal now, yeah. And then, yeah, he's just all over
the place. At one point, I was looking at my computer and you go,
Jake, you seen this? And he was like doing what
remember 2013 when wall twerking was really
big? He was like doing push-ups like that. Yes.
But his hands were on the couch. But he was doing it
quietly. And so like literally Jake was like
kind of in the zone and you didn't see it for a second.
Very quiet push-up
bro. So anyway, anything else going on?
I was eating my bowl of cereal
yesterday and i look up and i see i've gotten a con i think from isaac they both have such
terrible handwriting it's hard to know yeah but it just says your handwriting is great though
it's phenomenal it's got a little it's got a little smoothness to it does it isaac looks
like he's writing with his off hand constantly or like he was like being held ransom and it's
like no write a letter to your parents saying everything's fine okay he's like so nervous he can't write low-key isaac like have you ever
noticed he doesn't have the shakes yeah i try not to bring it up so i'm like maybe he doesn't like
this about himself yeah i don't i don't know about that does that translate to writing stuff you
think maybe like maybe that's why he if i bring michael j fox i'll ask him yeah it's the exact
same thing michael j fox as i think village woodworks Bo Burnham has that famous line in one of his songs.
How do you trace a scatterplot?
Give the pin to Michael J. Fox.
Scatterplot.
That's a fun word.
Good throwback.
Oh, but I got a con from Isaac that just says, isn't verified on Instagram yet.
I have no idea.
Like pretty much all the pros and cons are like something that happened.
I have no idea what I did to deserve that.
I forgot to bring it up and ask about it. I don't know why i got this con for just is it
verified on instagram that sounds like a harrison thing to say actually i don't know if that's
like harrison just throws out the most random things like that yeah i got a pro that just said
thoughtful which is really nice but i'm like what is this about i have no idea that's what he wants
you you're thoughtful you're proving his point like you're like what let me think about this um
yeah dude i actually got him like instagram dm maybe maybe you get these like every week but like
somebody was like hey would you like to get verified like do you ever get those oh yeah don't
no of course not yeah but i'm like no no thanks no but i'd be interested in giving money to
nigerian prince if you know of any i would love to i mean just in case here's my social security
number reach back out in a few months like no, no. Yeah. But it was just like, why would I care about being verified?
Yeah. I think I would comment on more people's stuff if I was verified. So then people would
be like, Whoa, I always do a double take. Like I don't really read it. And then I'm like, wait,
a verified person said this. Yeah. Yeah. Like, I think it'd be fun to hype my friends up. And
then they're like, then people are like, well, I saw someone verified comment on it. That's just
my friend, Jake. Yeah. What is the process like? Uh, like well I saw someone verified comment on doing this is my friend Jake yeah what is the process like a train I
were actually talking about last week he said it's the it was the hardest app for
him to get verified on Instagram yeah he said I could text a guy right now and
get you verified on Twitter if you wanted it yeah and he said do you want
it and I like nah that's probably true because like Twitter I have friends that
are like journalists yeah and they're like got a 300 followers and they're
verified yeah I do know some musicians on Instagram
that are verified,
just like a label.
If they're assigned to a label,
they will get you verified.
Interesting.
Not that big a deal.
Okay.
I'll tell you what else I've been doing this week.
Big business boy.
Yeah?
About a month ago,
I said I was like starting to get into the stock market,
but everything.
Oh man,
did we ever talk about that?
Maybe.
I don't think we ever talked about it on the podcast.
It's hard to say.
Somebody DM'd us, and maybe you didn't even see this DM. Maybe I didn't see this DM. about the podcast. It's hard to say somebody DM dust
and maybe you didn't even see this DM. Maybe you'll never know until I talk about it. Um,
but, uh, and the thing is, it was literally like audio of you like saying like, this is a good
stock to invest in. And it was like, it went down. I mean, instantly I thought about talking
about the podcast. Like it was crazy. Like the, the day our episode came out yeah it tanked like 15 or something yeah like a lot it was wild went from like 45 to like yeah 28 or something
like big time i think it actually went somewhere from like 825 to like 725 or something yeah it's
like a massive drop thing it's like back to where it is and it's like fully recovered now but i
thought we're bringing that up like the day the one stock is like all right i'll tell you about
this one right it plummeted uh that's so funny that someone else noticed that because i
wondered but yeah so just been trying to get into it more and not doing any of like the gmc that's
not right gme amc dogecoin i'm not doing any of that i'm doing like long-term yeah stuff but um
i found a you can like put your bitcoin i invested bitcoin like years ago you can put your Bitcoin, I invested in Bitcoin like years ago. You could put your Bitcoin in like a interest. What am I like? I got this like a interest fund, basically.
It's not like invest. How do I explain this? Basically guaranteed, guaranteed like interest
growth. Yeah. Like it'll grow every year with my Bitcoin. So that seems like a wise thing to do
because we're going gonna hang on to
Either way I'm sure and then last night about 2 a.m. I bought 10 different crypto currencies
Really kind of feels like gambling. It's kind of fun. Yeah, like one of these has got a pop-off
I do you understand anything about crypto like like the mining have like the mining part is very confusing
Yeah, like people people are literally like actively doing things to like increase the value or
something.
Maddie Short, her dad, he mines Bitcoin.
He has like hundreds of like, maybe not hundreds, dozens of computers in his basement.
They're like constantly mining Bitcoin.
I just don't even understand what that, like how, how, what does that mean?
I don't get it either.
They're like, they're, they have to do, here's what I know.
It's not very much.
Like the seven.
Hi.
Oh, I've been working on the
bitcoin all the live long day i think that these bitcoin computers this is what maddie told me in
person two years ago so i don't really know they have to like solve these like complex like math
problems essentially and when you like solve enough of them then you get like a piece to the code that's part
of the plan you know or whatever and eventually you need these like 16 digit codes that creates
one bitcoin i'm probably screwing that up so much but that's what i remember even like okay just
accepting that that's true how does that make it valuable yeah and and and how did like i don't get
that at all and like is her dad like actively watching these things Does he have to do something with I know you don't know but I don't I can't see how you're a sitter
What are they charge like it's hard for me to comprehend any of this stuff?
Yeah, no, it is confusing and we don't even know who invented Bitcoin like there's a guy's name
But we don't know if there was like a person if that's his real name if it's over people. Yeah, someone in Asia Wow, I
Yeah, I don't know. I
Don't buy Bitcoin. I don't buy it.
I literally don't buy it. I literally don't know if I, like I, anything I don't understand,
I'm not going to like invest very much money in, even though it's like valuable right now.
Like, like if, if, if someone had all their money in Bitcoin and they're like, all right, that'd be scary. Yeah. Like pay me scary. Yeah, like pay me, like that car over there costs three Bitcoin.
It's like, how do you give them three Bitcoin
without just like electronically transferring
over this random number?
That's why it's so secure.
What do you mean?
Like you can never get Bitcoin
still on your wallet, essentially.
Oh, okay.
Yeah, but still, it's just like,
it's just confusing the heck.
Have you heard about that guy? There was some guy that had a bunch of money in Bitcoin. He forgot his password. Yes. Yes.
Incredible. Was it like they get 10 tries or whatever? How many, do you know how many there
were? I forget, but it was like $200 million and he can't remember his password. Yeah. And he had
like two more tries or something like that. It's like out of a movie or out of like a Black Mirror
episode. Can you imagine? I don't even watch Black mirror oh my gosh yeah he's just like all right i got two more left like that's all that's all
you spend the rest of your life doing that's it the same like at the same time you can't try very
many times you have you have to like invest money into like your memory like go to like a stanford
psychologist to be like touch the part of my brain that will make me remember this please but what if
you get to the wrong psychologist that
just actually erases everything and then you really can't do it like you're done like you
have to really you have to you have to research the psychologist first like do you think there
is a psychologist who knows how to touch a part of your brain to erase everything i think so
what's his name um oh shoot tim tim anderson Yeah. Yeah. That's his name. Yeah. Tim Anderson,
PhD. I don't know, man. Like, yeah, that I was about to say, I'd rather be myself than that guy.
That's not true. I would rather, I'd rather potentially have $200 million, but like,
why would you, why would you go to your, you know, whatever, $40,000 a year
job when you have $200 million waiting for you if you just figure out this one thing.
But then again, it's like, gosh, if I don't figure it out, right, I'm done.
And I can't try very many more times.
I don't know that that gets me.
Sure.
That he could talk to the company and just be like, I'm out of tries.
Can I like, I don't know know give you something kidney yeah what do you guys want i'll take i'll give you three of
my fingers choose which ones would you do that for 200 million dollars three fingers yeah three
questions three fingers 200 million dollars three fingers any of them and i don't choose a finger yeah oh yeah and let's say let's say two full fingers one half so okay like you get a nub like you get a little
jpp like weird thing going on i mean that's like a life-changing amount of money it's a life-changing
amount of deformity too what a good am i i wonder if people are listening or also having trouble or
there's like an obvious answer no there's not an obvious answer there's not an obvious answer because like how happy
would you be with 200 million dollars if you can't type do xyz sure type fast like and would
you go all three fingers one hand or would you go like one half fingers one finger this is then
you don't have any good hand this is like when someone rolls a seven in Settlers and you have 10 cards.
You're like, all right.
Yeah.
I'm on two things of wheat.
So did I give away all five wheat?
I'm probably going to get it back soon, but maybe not.
Maybe I should diversify my wheat folio.
And you need wheat for almost everything.
You need wheat.
You need wheat.
Oh, not for roads, but yeah.
Yeah.
Anyway.
I would cut off my fingers.
You would?
I would. It takes $200 million. I would. And, I would suck off my fingers you would I would it takes her million dollars I would
And then I would would you give me any money if you want to her million dollars? Yeah. Oh, yeah
How much you think I'll give you a lot more than you think you you deserve. Oh cool
Thanks better not as they're like think about think of good for you with the Dave Ramsey. Yeah
Think about how much money I'm gonna give you'm going to tell you my number in three seconds.
I would give you
$1 million.
What?
Yeah.
Of $200 million?
Yeah.
$200 million is so much money, dude.
You would give me $1 million.
I would give you $1 million.
I'll give you $1 million.
Yeah.
I would.
That's amazing.
Thank you.
The number I had in my head,
this is not for me to give you.
This is what I would have
expected from you
was $10,000.
No. I thought that would be so nice expected from you, was $10,000. No!
I thought that would be so nice.
Like, here's $10,000.
Quick percentage, what's $10,000?
Not much.
I know.
No way, dude.
I'd hook you up, dude.
Wow.
Yeah.
And then I would feel like, okay, I just got a million dollars.
I got to give a lot of this away.
It's the Chick-fil-A thing.
Yes.
And really, Catherine's on the other, Catherine's behind me
and you give $500,000 to her.
And now we save some money on taxes
and she gets $500,000.
It would be fun to just have,
like, just money to be charitable with.
Like, pay off all my sisters,
like grad school student loans.
Oh, yeah.
It'd be awesome.
Oh, yeah.
Get my parents,
what do they want?
Your dad, just a big case of diet dr pepper yeah yeah get my mom some nice new reading glasses yeah she loves those for yeah for her
that'd be awesome for crosswords new uh like mouse pad they use a mouse pad i think
i think okay yeah and if not it's probably time for a new one.
And it was, it's a nice like patent leather.
Like it's nice.
It's got like the wrist like thing, like raised for your wrist.
Sure.
It's nice.
It's nice for a carpal ton.
Now I'm imagining your mom watching your YouTube videos on like the desktop computer in Stratford.
Yeah.
Kind of like hunched over.
Yeah.
Yeah.
She got the printer next to her, like printer paper. Just 18 wires. And God knows what they'reed over. Yeah. Yeah. She got the printer next to her with like printer paper.
Just 18 wires.
And God knows what they're connected to.
Yeah.
Just what, how do we have all these wires?
Like the windows 95, like installation CD.
We got like two speakers that have so much dust on them.
Oh yeah.
You can't even hear sound coming out.
Yep.
Absolutely.
Absolutely.
Our computer is in the worst spot.
It was like, you can't open the garage door.
Like to go down to the garage while someone's sitting at the computer.
Like you get one or the other. that was just like you come in hot from
the garage you could you could hit somebody yeah playing minesweeper yeah if cosmo kramer comes in
you get smacked playing pinball wizard pinball no the windows xp game is that what you're thinking
of yeah what was it called it was just pinball pinball wizards from the who it's a song but
no that game was awesome.
Yeah.
Oh, man.
Let's try to recreate some sound effects from that game.
Remember, like...
That's the only one I can remember.
That's actually a really good...
Justin, well...
That wasn't bad.
Yeah, see if you can find that.
See if you can find what I just made.
That's a great...
That's exactly how it starts every time.
And if you like get it
right, like you, you
don't just like shoot
the ball all the way
to the top.
Yeah.
You go do that little
secret passage.
You got like 66%.
Uh huh.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I can't do any more
sounds, but I want to.
That was the ball
hitting.
Bling bling bling.
Yeah.
Oh, that was great.
Windows XP was awesome. Remember when I had an actual pinball machine in my house? Yeah. It was louder than a Sonicling, bling, bling. Yeah. Oh, that was great. Windows XP was awesome.
Remember when I had an actual pinball machine in my house?
Yeah.
It was louder than a sonic boom, but boy, was it fun.
It was so loud.
It was the loudest thing.
It was annoying, honestly.
Like most of the time for me, I was kind of a wet blanket.
I was like this thing.
Can we play that some other time?
Yeah.
I'm trying to, I'm trying to talk to my wife here.
I get like two hours with her a day here.
Yeah.
And at any given time, Clayton Phillips is probably playing that pinball machine.
And you just hear,
dang it!
Come on!
Oh, Clayton.
You'll be all right.
You'll be all right.
Packers?
That's what you just give him,
a little Packers squeeze.
Yeah, that's the Packers guy, man.
Hey, sir, calm down.
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Must be legal drinking age.
So I was at McLean's
Mondays, which I'm really excited
for someday you to join. I'm going to join.
It's going to be awesome. This could be the Monday. Trey's still out of town.
He's not. I lied. Dang it.
I might not be there this Monday.
We get there early enough where you could get there if you want to get there.
I was there at 8 o'clock this week. I was there at eight o'clock this week.
I was there at eight o'clock and I almost walked there.
It's been like very,
very cold single ditch.
And I,
I like Catherine kind of convinced me out of it.
Like,
why would you walk?
And I was like,
yeah,
you're right.
That's a really good question.
Yeah.
But I was like,
well,
my friends are going to be there.
They can drive me home.
I get there at eight o'clock.
None of my friends are there at nine o'clock.
Like I'm like,
so I finally texted like,
anybody coming? I woke up to a text that said y'all snoozing. Yeah. Yeah. Y'all snoozing.
And cause I was like, imagine if I were to walk there thinking my friends are going to drive me
back. Luckily they came. Um, but I had this kind of weird interaction with this woman.
I would say she's 75 years old. She was older woman. Um, and I don't think there was anything
wrong with her. Like, I think she was just raised poorly. I'm just kidding And I don't think there was anything wrong with her.
Like, I think she was just raised poorly.
No, I'm just kidding.
Like, I think she was just like, she just like was a little bit too blunt.
But I probably had this question asked to me at least three times in the last month
from somebody.
They just go, why aren't you, why aren't you going?
Why aren't you working?
That's what she said.
Why aren't you working?
People ask you that?
Yeah.
You just look very worker.
She was talking to, yeah, she was like kind kind of addressing i had to go sit kind of close
to her because i was charging my computer but then the rest of us were all hanging out and we
were obviously having a good time laughing and yeah but we were on our computers she's like why
aren't you maybe she even said like why aren't you at your job okay and i was like well i was like
it's 2020 people work from remotely all the time in fact it's 2021 oh my gosh see
bad with dates yeah so it's probably I mean I don't know about you I'm still writing 2020 on
all my checks it's so annoying are you serious that was a joke was it because I don't write
no one writes checks I actually just wrote a check today what a loser definitely wrote 2020
and oh that's crazy and I have to like sign off on all Hattie's Awana things.
And I've put 20 literally four times just tonight.
Gosh, I'm an idiot.
Yeah, do you feel dumb?
Yeah, I do.
I love that.
Yeah, anyway, why aren't you at your job?
And I was like, well, actually, we all have different jobs.
We kind of do our own thing.
She's like, okay.
She's just so dry and weird.
She's like, what's your job?
And I was like, well, I'm a woodworker.
I was custom creations.
No, I didn't say all that, but I'm a woodworker.
I point to Isaac.
I post in the morning.
When do you poop, man?
You might as well ask.
Do a little more research.
Are you regular?
Yeah.
You need something for that?
How much prune juice do you have in a week?
Right.
I noticed you're a coffee drinker, so maybe three, four times a day.
Let me just ask this.
Do you like irrigation?
Does that ring any bells?
The Browns didn't go to the Super Bowl, but, um, so, so she, she's, she's like, I was like,
yeah, I'm a woodworker.
Isaac.
I point Isaac's a woodworker.
You know, this guy, Luke's a mortgage lender, blah, blah, blah.
Harrison having fun.
And I was like, yeah, Harrison's getting the vibes.
But, uh, she goes, well then why aren't you woodworking? And I'm like, lady, I'm trying the vibes. But, uh, she goes, well, then why aren't you woodworking?
And I'm like, lady, I'm trying to be nice to you.
Lay off.
Yeah.
You're kind of hurting.
I was like, well, there's more to it than just woodworking.
And I tried to explain, like, I do stuff on my computer.
Like I'm like, show it to her.
Like I had to like justify, like I'm doing my working, like look at this table.
Huh?
It was just like at a weird interaction like that.
Like surely she understands in 2021 there's other ways
yeah to make a living or there's yeah there's ways to make a living in a coffee shop that's
kind of stuff bothers me but just like when people and it's probably not her fault just like they're
not great at expressing their own tone that they have like it just sounds more like condescending
than maybe she means to be like so okay if you a woodworker, why aren't you working your wood?
It's like, yeah.
Hey, I don't like the way you worded that.
Right.
And leave me alone.
I don't even know you.
Like, I think she was kind of trying to be playful, but she was just so dry with it that
it was like, you're just kind of coming off kind of rude and I don't love it, but you're
kind of old.
So I'm not going to be mean to you, but it was just like, why aren't you working?
So there was this old man at pickleball the night who uh just kind of came up and just starts talking to isaac and he goes i gotta get
all this junk off my phone and i was like okay what kind of junk and he's like all these emails
and he's like they're asking me you know you your job application's been accepted i didn't apply for
any jobs and uh i'm like oh yeah you, Oh yeah. And they, you know,
male enhancement pills. He's like, yeah, I'm getting those. I was like, I wouldn't even open those. Those don't even work. And that goes right over his head. So I'm like, dang, that could have
been funny. Whatever could have, you know, bridge the gap. Those things are a ripoff.
And then he's like, and this one it's telling me my credit score is 708. And I was like, hey, that's not bad. And he's like, my credit score is 782.
And then Isaac's like, is it?
He's like, I'll show you.
And Isaac goes, 50 bucks.
You owe me 50 bucks if it's not 782.
And I swear to God, this is how it went down.
And he's like, all right, let me find it.
Let me find it.
He's like trying to go on his phone to find his credit score.
And he gets on there.
He's like, okay, 776. That's not bad. Isaac goes, you owe me 50 bucks. He's like, oh, wait, phone to find his credit score and he gets on there he's like okay 776 that's not bad i was like you owe me 50 bucks he's like oh wait 772 isaac goes another
50 bucks yeah compounded interest yeah sorry oh that's funny um so yeah just speaking of old
people just like coming up and just talking to you it was he was like so we walked out of chicken
pickle and my first words to isaac i was like i hope i never get old enough to where i just show
people my credit score it was such a weird. I remember my dad probably like 10 or 15
years ago, we were driving past this old man and he was like, Hey, if I ever start dressing like
this guy, like, let me know, you know, like basically like if I ever get old and I don't
realize how old I am, let me know. I think I'm, I think I'm getting to that point with my dad
every once in a while where I'm like, maybe not with his dress, but
sometimes I'm like, Dad, you've told me that story
five times already.
It's like, I've heard this before.
And honestly... And take off those overalls.
Yeah, and take off the overalls. Actually, overalls are back in a little
bit. Maybe not if you're your dad's age.
Or if you're doing what
my dad does.
He's just retired, going to
missions meetings in his overalls. I don't
think that's really a thing. Yeah. Unless you're farming or making a tick tock overalls are not in
not too much. Uh, but along with my dad, I think Isaac is kind of a repeat storyteller.
Have you ever noticed that? Yeah. I mean, we all are no one. I mean, I'm bad with it. Yeah. I think
Trey is the worst of all my friends. Really? Yeah. He just doesn't remember telling you the stuff?
No.
Do you stop him?
No, I take it as a moment to improve my acting skills.
You know, hey, middle school Maddox round two comes around, I'm going to be better.
I'm going to be better than Sensei Tanner.
Yeah.
And so I'm like, oh, no way.
Whoa.
You're kidding.
Dad blasted horse feathers.
That's crazy.
That's funny.
Yeah, Trey's not great. Isaac is more surprising. He'll do it within like two hours he'll try to tell me and i'm like well
okay you told me it's like two hours ago i think it's like him starting a conversation like trying
to like start the conversation again just about woodworking so he tells me his woodworking idea
yeah yeah that's a good idea good idea um so anyway, did you hear the news that High Sea Orange is coming back to McDonald's?
The drink?
I didn't.
I didn't hear the news.
You didn't?
I don't have my ear to the ground on High Sea.
Oh, it's huge news for me.
Really?
Oh, I was sad when they took it away.
That was like my drink back in the day.
I will say, yeah, 2016, we were drinking some High Sea.
It was so good.
It was so good.
I like it a lot for their breakfasts because I don't really like their coffee, their orange
juice, but High Sea was nice with the hotcakes. I like their orange juice, but it costs $11. It's so good. I like it a lot for their breakfasts because I don't really like their coffee, their orange juice, but high C was nice with the hotcakes.
I liked their orange juice, but it costs $11.
It's so expensive.
Exactly.
And the high C is just like the normal drink price.
So I'm excited about it.
And so I was just thinking about, okay, high C was a great thing that I used to drink a
lot as a kid.
So then I was thinking about other things, similar things to that.
And I just made a quick list for for you jakey thanks um
tell me if you resonate with any of these fun dip oh you like the fun nothing makes my tongue
like just enlarge and feel like it's not even a part of my body like fun dip i love it like
like what a great idea to just like take one stick and just keep dipping that stick in there the whole time i was trying to say dip sugar in more sugar yeah and my genius
richard i you know we would call him something else but he was the guy who showed me fun dip
oh yeah you know i was gonna tell a story about him and i changed my mind oh good for you gotcha uh so fun dip fun dip i really
only had it like at baseball tournaments randomly yeah those are big concession stands yeah yeah i
love the concession stand at baseball tournaments sour punch straws yes those are nice yeah where
you go green blue red uh blue yeah it was nice like blue blue artificial flavor is just my
favorite blue blast blue blast yeah absolutely so fun favorite. Blue blast. Blue blast. Yeah, absolutely.
So fun dip number one.
Number two, Gushers.
You ever had Gushers?
I mean.
We weren't a Gushers family.
Too expensive.
We weren't a Gushers.
Scooby-Doo snacks.
A lot of these are like commodities for me, like things that I had at my friend's house
or something.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Scooby-Doo snacks.
That's what you had.
Yeah.
Those are more low end.
I don't even remember what I had.
Maybe some fruit by the foot at some point but um i
really like gushers they just pop in your mouth um slurpees were you a slurpee guy oh yeah who is
it yeah yeah do you have a favorite flavor i was pina colada oh you dog i know they only had
certain ones yeah i mean i'm a sucker for artificial cherry yes i will get that like
the cherry oh yeah not picky no yeah. No. Yeah. So good.
Honestly,
I love Coke Slurpees a lot.
People give me a hard time,
but I love a Coke Slurpee.
Oh,
just like straight up.
Straight up.
I love doing cherry Coke.
Okay.
Yeah.
Hey,
do it.
Hey,
remember when,
uh,
they came out with frozen Cokes at McDonald's?
Good times.
And we like,
we scavenged the city.
Yeah.
On Valentine's day.
That's right.
Yeah.
It's coming up.
It just came actually.
Oh yeah. Yesterday. Insert joke. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Uh, valentine's day that's right yeah it's coming up it just came actually oh yeah yesterday insert joke yeah yeah yeah uh richard uh so what about bugles you like bugles not a bugles guy i i wasn't
a huge bugles guy but i like putting them on my fingers and acting like i'm like ever scissorhands
uh dude this one actually gets me fired up. Rich chocolate Ovaltine. Remember those commercials?
Yeah, it was in my 90s rap.
You remember it?
Yeah.
Yeah, but I never had it.
Dude.
Didn't know how to get it really.
I was like, do I have to call in to get this?
I feel like that was the first MLM.
Like somehow like where do people get this Ovaltine?
Yeah.
Yeah.
Like you don't just go to the stores and get that.
I don't think you have to.
You have to know.
You have to know Hancock or Tony.
Tony Hank.
Oh, yeah. Are you sure I say Hancock? Yeah. Not again, guys. Richard.
No, Scott had Ovaltine at his house and it was nice, dude. It was really, really good.
Maybe it's more of a Mormon drink. Maybe they get it at the temple.
That is what, no, you're right. I'm remembering now. Yeah, it is. It's a Mormon drink. You only
get it in Utah, Idaho, in certain parts of Gilbert, Arizona, Gilbert, Arizona. You're welcome. Um, okay. And then just
a few more little Debbie, like the whole franchise, a little Debbie zebra cakes. Yes. Like I haven't
had those things in so long, but they were nice. They're still making them. I believe it. I just
have a wife that would just judge me so hard if I brought home zebra cakes. Well, you keep walking
with claims. You'd be all right. That's right. Three degree weather. It's so cold. It's crazy cold. Uh, and then last one is
Lunchables, just a classic pizza. Like there's nothing I could think of more on this list or
just in general of like something that was so coveted as a little kid that is just like,
I would not want that at all as an adult. Right? Like a, it's like pretty stale. The pizza one
was definitely like the best, right? Cause you, it's like pretty stale. The pizza one was definitely like
the best, right? Cause you got to like make your own thing with like the little like stick, like
the plastic stick. But it was like, yeah, the pizza, like it was like you get four little
cracker. Like it's like not very much food at all. It's not very good food and you're eating
FDA approved cardboard. Yeah, pretty much. And like, I was so jealous of kids that had lunch.
It was nice. Yeah. Yeah. Never, never really had that. But, um,. And like, I was so jealous of kids that had Lunchables. It
was nice. Yeah. Yeah. Never, never really had that. But, um, so anyway, I'm really excited
about high C orange drink coming back. So that's awesome. That was my in, in honor, in honorarium.
You know what I learned tonight speaking to drink is that lemonade at Chick-fil-A,
there's an upcharge. It's not the same as everything. It's like 25 cents and you can't
get free refills. Well, you can't get what now? You can't get free refills.
I think, well, maybe you can.
Yeah, I said you can't get free refills with it.
You know me.
I live for the free refills.
Is it that expensive to make lemonade?
Right.
Coveted?
Yeah, that's how it is at Raising Cane's too, I think.
And maybe tea.
No, I don't know. I don't know if tea is more expensive.
But yeah, that's a bummer.
You think it's like half as expensive if you go for the LeBron?
That's what I do every time.
A little lemonade, a little Powerade?
I don't know.
I just know my order is more expensive than Isaac's now.
I'm like, well, you got large fries.
How's mine more expensive?
He's like, lemonade.
What?
Yeah.
It's that much more?
Yeah.
Dude.
Something's going on. Also, three out of the last four times I've gone to Chick-fil-A, they give me a medium. way more expensive he's like lemonade what yeah it's that much more i don't yeah dude something's
going on also three out of the last four times we're going to chick-fil-a they give me a medium
and i'm like and then i i do a good job i don't say i think i say i ordered a large okay which
just doesn't seem right to treat chick-fil-a like that but it's true brad i ordered a large fact
yeah yeah three out of the last four times also tonight i'm just gonna keep ragging on them okay
i said can i get a lot of oh sorry i, can I get a lot of, Oh, sorry. I forgot. Can I get a lot of honey roasted
barbecue sauce? Gives me three. Did you go hand motion? Um, you gotta go hand motion
because you got to show how much, how much you can fit in your hand. Can I get a lot like that?
That's I've told you, I've had, I've had experience with this. Like, is this a lot to you,
sir? You eat here, right? You know, you know that we did an order for Jake and order for Isaac from
this car. Yeah. You know how much food we just got three packets of the smallest pack, right? You know. You know that we did an order for Jake, an order for Isaac from this car. Yeah.
You know how much food we just got.
Three packets of the smallest pack.
Right.
A lot.
Because that's like one and a half of the other ones.
I'm going to go like this.
Can I get a lot of Chick-fil-A sauce?
Oh, just a hefty amount.
You know.
Yeah, you got to go for the hand motion or just a handful
handful maybe handful might might get you there but um yeah yeah i i don't know i haven't been
to chick-fil-a in a long time i miss it trey said he hasn't been since he you almost thought you
were gonna cry about it trey said he hasn't i was trying to get the word out or the sins out i
couldn't uh since he moved to his new house,
it was at four months or whatever.
Just hasn't been back to Chick-fil-A.
He's so urban now.
He's so cool.
He only goes to places where,
you know,
they shut down after six months.
Yeah.
He only goes to places that are actually affected by COVID.
It's lame.
Yeah.
So I told him,
I'm like,
I'm just going to show up here one day with Chick-fil-A and you're going to
remember how good it is.
Dude.
Yeah.
I miss it.
Um,
Oh,
speaking of Chick-fil-A, uh, Harrison to remember how good it is. Dude, I miss it. Oh, speaking of Chick-fil-A, Harrison
had kind of a funny story.
I mean, Harrison
is funny in a lot of ways. The Vibes, the Vibes fan.
PeachesOnOnions.com, which is
a real website that exists that is available
that Harrison bought. And he'll write these
stories. And Brad,
I had the thought, would you like to do a
dramatic reading of one of the blog posts that
Harrison wrote of his journey back from Fayetteville, Arkansas this week? Peachesandonions.com.
Peachesandonions.com. Check it out. I think you could skip like the first three paragraphs and
just get into like the story. Yeah. I recently traveled down to Fayetteville. Yeah. Because
him telling me the story in person was pretty like sad slash hilarious. So we're going to do
a dramatic reading
and what i'm gonna try to do since i have the computer plugged into the uh audio cord is i'm
gonna try to be youtubing and playing music that fits the certain scene of what you're reading okay
as best as i can okay i'll you'll be i'll go a little bit slow like hey you just read how you
need to read and um yeah I'll try to catch up.
Although it is frigid in this basement and I might as well not have three fingers because
I can't move as fast.
I usually warm up like halfway through to the point where I'm not thinking about it.
I'm thinking about it tonight.
I put my hands in this little big daddy beanie.
Yeah.
Poopsies in the winter coat today.
Like, holy cow, dude.
OK, so I'm gonna do this like it's kind of like a documentary.
Are you ready?
Yep.
I recently traveled down to Fayetteville, Arkansas.
To spend the weekend with my brother and his wife.
Freddie. Freddie. to spend the weekend with my brother and his wife. The drive from Kansas City to Fayetteville,
it's not that complex.
In fact, it's pretty much a straight shot
just right south.
After enjoying a lovely weekend with my family,
I was ready to get back to
Kansas City and join my friends
to watch the broadcast of the Chiefs
playing in the Super Bowl.
I gathered my
things, I plugged my address into
Google Maps, and I started on my way back home
not long after 12 o'clock noon.
The drive itself, it takes about three and a half hours to complete.
No problem.
Super Bowl wouldn't be airing until 530 p.m.
Central Standard Time.
I'd have plenty of time to make it home.
Shower, throw on a change of clothes and get to the watch party before kickoff.
The drive home started off beautifully.
I love
making phone calls when I'm on the road and this was a perfect opportunity to catch up with people
I hadn't had the chance to talk with in a while. After about an hour of driving, I realized that
the temperature seemed to be dropping. I was beginning to see what looked like snow flurries
zooming past my windshield. I'd known prior to my departure that I was going to run into some
winter action, so I wasn't all that worried. I was making good time, following my maps, and enjoying the silence
that I had in between phone conversations. About an hour later, that's two hours into the trip,
I passed by a sign that said, welcome to Springfield. I thought to myself,
Springfield? That's impossible. I can't believe how good that worked.
I turned my map off to save battery in my phone because I had left my charger at home.
A quality of mine that I desperately wish to eliminate.
I pulled Google Maps up once again to check my location.
I remember taking the exit of Highway 44 east in Joplin, Missouri.
It was supposed to connect me with 49 north towards Kansas City, right?
The truth is yes.
It does connect you to 49.
But you have to actually get
on 49 North. Otherwise you stay
on 44 East.
All the way to Springfield.
Almost an hour
out of the way. I felt
so dumb. The blunder had made my trip
almost an hour and a half longer and the weather
was starting to get worse. I myself such an idiot this sucks so bad how could i do this for real for real
that's literally what i said it's for real for real i did a little backtracking to get on the
highway i needed to be on and began to feel a little better about my about things once i realized
i could stay on the same road for almost two hours.
Okay, great. Yeah, I'm good.
I still have enough battery left on my phone.
The heater's being spotty, but I have a blanket, so I think I'm good.
It was not good.
The weather began to get worse the nearer I got to Kansas City.
The spotty heater proved to be a nuisance as I had to pull over to the side of a busy, slippery highway to scrape off my completely iced over windshield five times
throughout the course of the next three hours. Finally, with about 45 minutes left in the trip,
my heater began to stay hot consistently, giving me a big enough gap in the lower part of the
windshield to see through if I drove hunched over the steering wheel like Mr. Incredible.
I slid into Kansas City five minutes before kickoff,
greeted my friends at the watch party,
and then found my way to the bathroom to have a short moment of teary-eyed frustration in front of the mirror.
Really, dude?
You're going to be 30 this year?
You still can't remember your charger?
That trip took five hours.
Will you ever be better?
After going through a full range of emotion,
insulting my own intelligence,
I returned to the party feeling better.
At least I had finally made it to a safe place
with people that love me.
The frustrations of my trip home
confronted me once again with the truth
that I'm a man in need of grace.
Oh.
Didn't see that coming.
There will always be times in life No that I'm a man in need of grace. Oh, I didn't see that coming. There will always be times in life. No, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm jubilant that, that see me come up
short or forget things that could be easily remembered. The trip may never look exactly
like I want it to. My one, my windshield will probably keep freezing over. And I'll have to get out to scrape it off once again.
But I can rest in the truth
that God's grace is sufficient to see me to the end.
I'll pray to remember what he has seen me through
and when I want to feel frustrated with someone
because they're not ideally who they should be,
I'll remember what it felt like to end up in Springfield.
Be encouraged.
HB.
Y'all want a victory!
Thank you.
Well, that was something.
There was no prep to
win into that. I'm just searching. Here are my
cinematic background music. Intense
background music. Epic dramatic background music oh
yeah happy upbeat yeah that was the best one when he got we got kind of reflective
and it was just upbeat the other one I said goofy comedy background music oh
those are the staccatos remember that no throwback we talked about staccato
that we said oh that's triplets that I should remember that. No, the staccatos are like that.
Like just like quick, quick notes. It's funny. Quotes, a beat comedy.
Good job, Harrison. That is, that's rough. I, I like, I think so often it's funny. Like when you don't have a nice car and Harrison's car, isn't like terrible. It's like a 2006,
like,
like,
but like when I had my old trucks and like how crappy they were, I just remember like coveting and like wanting so badly to have like a nice
car.
And now that I have one,
I just think I take it for granted so much.
It's like,
yeah,
just having defrost that works.
Yeah,
dude.
A lot of people are coveting that.
Yeah.
I was talking to Scott about that last night.
I was like,
I remember back in the day I,
my car,
my,
the new was like,
so like terrible that I would have to call you and be like, Hey, can you
come pick me up and take me to school today? Cause the heaters, yeah, the heater hasn't,
it's been on for 20 minutes since it hasn't defrosted a bit. Um, so anyway, before we get
to the voicemails, should we do another installation of, I don't buy it. I don't buy it.
I don't buy it. Yeah. You tell me, I don't know if I have a great one this week.
I mean, I already had one.
Bitcoin. Don't buy it.
I don't buy it.
For this week's edition of I Don't Buy It,
it's the phrase in the
well-accepted truth, allegedly,
that dogs' mouths are cleaner
than humans. No way. I don't buy it.
I don't buy that one bit. I've owned dogs.
I've seen what they do.
Oh, dude.
To their own excrement,
to their own vomit,
to other dogs.
Cleaner than mine?
I don't buy it.
I use toothpaste.
I use 3D whitening.
I have a story.
At least once a week.
Do you?
Seriously.
The whitening or the brushing of your teeth
at least once a week?
Both.
Okay.
Seriously.
I don't know if I want to tell this.
Oh, you have a story?
Yeah.
Why don't you just tell me now into the microphone.
Right.
And then if you don't want it later, then you won't know.
Don't judge us.
Don't judge me.
Who's us?
Am I in the story?
No.
Am I the dog?
No, you are in the story.
Okay.
Maybe you'll see it coming quicker.
But I'll try to be kind of dramatic about how I present this story.
So Bo is obviously still in diapers.
And every once in a while with kids, they get little diaper rashes or something.
And so Catherine likes to do what she calls air time,
a.k.a. just time with no diaper where they just basically roam.
Like the babies just roam,
like roam around naked.
Just that's how it should be.
Yeah.
Right.
Yeah,
absolutely.
Not at the park though.
How Adam,
how Adam did it.
Not at the park.
No,
no,
no,
no.
This is just around the,
around the house.
So it's 2020.
Um,
and I'm fine with it,
you know, um there's been a few times
where hattie has like kind of like wet herself or not wet herself wet everywhere else yeah and i'm
like katherine like put a diaper on her like that's that's so frustrating to me um kind of
like the same same idea of like getting carpet wet for, you know, the, the handyman coming in, shower carpet. It's
like, we could have avoided this. Um, so anyway, Bo's got airtime the other day for whatever reason,
all four of us, Catherine, Hattie, Brad, Bo all in Hattie's room, all doing airtime.
Yeah. Just in a, in a circle, like with a gym bay, you know, it's very like with our essential
oils going. Um, but like Catherine was kind of cleaning up, you know, whatever.
We were all just hanging out.
I was sitting on Hattie's bed and,
and Bo's like kind of like a little bit of a mischievous guy.
Like he'll,
he'll eat anything right now.
He'll eat,
like he'll put anything in his mouth.
So you kind of have to be looking out for him.
And so like,
we're kind of moving around how he's doing her thing.
And I look up and I'm like,
where did,
how did Bo get that candy bar?
It was not candy bar. Horse feathers.
This isn't good.
I look and I just scream.
I just go, Bowie!
That's what I call him, Bowie. I'm like, Bowie!
And Catherine turns around and he's like
eating the excrement.
You want to talk about not a clean mouth.
Dog's mouth is probably cleaner thanry clearing both I was a I was like kind of yeah mortified by it cuz like what in the world
Yeah, is Mike is my kid a dog is my kid a dog every parent will ask that question at some point apparently Yeah, and how do you was like so I mean she never pooped herself without a diaper
I don't think but like how do you was so?
like
Easy going and didn't didn't like put things in her mouth like if we didn't put that little latch on the stairs to the without a diaper on, I don't think. But Hattie was so easygoing
and didn't put things in her mouth.
If we didn't put that little latch on the stairs
to the basement,
Bo would have fallen down five times by now.
Oh, they say he would have eaten it.
Probably.
He just puts everything in his mouth.
And so it's like,
luckily it wasn't really bad in there,
but there was some in there.
Catherine had to scrape it out.
I just, that's gross, man. I think that's a pretty good, uh, birth control right there. That story.
That'll yeah. That'll stick with me for a while. I think. Yeah, dude. And anyone else thinking
about having kids, you're like, Oh, you've eaten some, you've had some poop. You've had your mouth
scraped. Oh dude. It was so gross. And I was like trying to put out a brave face for Hattie.
So I had to like, you're like, no, this is very normal. This is very normal. Like we were trying to clean up Hattie's room. That's why we were in there. And she's like,
I'm scared to clean up now because of the poop. And I was like, girl, I get it. That was my senior
quote. I totally get it. You know, I was just trying to make it normal. Like, okay, put away,
put away your stuff to animals. I'm like in the, in your tears and anything else. Yeah. Put it away.
So anyway, well, who knew my who knew? I don't buy it.
It was going to lead to all that.
Yeah.
I don't think I need to say anymore.
You guys know.
You guys know what I mean.
That was like my thought, though, is like when you said about the dog, I was like, that's
what dogs do.
That's what they do.
We're better than this.
What are you doing?
We have algebra and technology and they have cleaner mouths than us.
I don't buy it.
Maybe you buy it now, though.
It's like, what are we doing? No way. No way. Do dogs have cleaner mouths than us? I don't buy it. Maybe you buy it now, though. It's like, what are we doing?
No way.
No way do dogs have cleaner mouths.
I'd like to know, like, by what metric are we judging cleanliness?
Unless, is poop actually cleansing?
Maybe it bows onto something.
If you were to tell me poop is cleansing, I'd probably say I don't buy it.
But I don't know.
Poop is cleansing.
I don't buy it.
Oh, okay.
Never mind.
Yeah, I take that.
All right, let's get us some voice memos uh if i could find them got it got it got it okay where'd we leave off last week
it was sam right he had like the three question ones hey jake and brad this is mary claire from
virginia i love the podcast and i loved the part about double names a couple months back
because people get my name
wrong a lot don't remember that we talk right now I am in high school and have partly online partly
in school classes and the online classes are honestly horrible but I was wondering if you
had any suggestions for how to spice them up or make them more fun. Also, Brad, who is your favorite Parks and Rec character?
Because I love both Parks and Rec and The Office.
Okay, that's all for today.
Thank you.
Bye-bye.
I just thought of something while she was recording that.
Mary Claire, leave us a five-star review
and let me know if you recorded that
with like your Apple headphone microphone.
It sounded like it.
I feel like that's like a Gen Z thing.
That's how they make their TikToks.
And I feel like it was like in the middle of it like rattling against your shirt or
something oh yeah you think you don't think it was airpods you think it was a yeah i think it
was like a dingle dongle yeah yeah i want to be like a a detective but it's never a crime people
just call me in just for information about stuff that they don't know oh i like that no no crimes
no crimes please no drinks i can't do it okay uh what'd you ask
i just remember the parks and rec thing i got distracted by that uh high school
hey mary claire love your devil name high school and have partly online part the online classes
i was wondering if you had any suggestions for how to spice them up or make them
more fun how to spice how to spice got it okay so you have the theme day so of course every single
day remember back in the day like in elementary school and stuff it was like spirit week and you
got to do all these different fun things like wear your pajamas to class wear crazy hat day
crazy hair day yeah yeah and crazy hair i feel like it's not that
difficult to do um at strafford we had a cool theme day one time uh only like one of the students
was actually doing it but it was um doing appropriate things with your teacher day oh yeah
and like one of the kids was like really into it really yeah and it was like when the cops came he
was like i thought it was a thing it's a spirit week right hey come on that's what that's what
we do here yeah look at you guys are in pajamas yeah you guys i'm just having i'm just
having air time what's the big deal if that's air time then lock me up let's do this crazy thing
you know i thought everyone was doing it um no i think spirit days is the answer for me
it's just like yeah just
and maybe it's a
coordinated effort like with
everybody else because that'd be fun to like
be like oh taco Tuesday
like let's all
bring something or like maybe like did you ever have like
in Spanish class especially we had
food parties and everybody brought different food
comida fiesta
la comida de la fiesta.
Uh,
yeah.
Like everyone brings something else and that'd be kind of fun to pretend like
you're like,
like sharing it with everybody,
but really you're just,
you know,
a tortilla roll up yourself.
Yeah.
I think it'd be fun to,
especially don't get too many people on the first theme day.
I think it's more fun if only three of you are wearing a banana suit and
it's like,
it's enough to notice it.
People are like,
I want to get on that.
Like who liked certain this? Like, Oh, that's that's very clear yeah and eventually it's a banana split
so you got somebody doing ice cream somebody doing chocolate syrup yeah i don't really know
what's in a banana split actually now i think about it i think it's just half a banana oh that's
it that's it that is all a banana split is just half it cut down the cut vertically though it
looks weird yeah it's not like the lord intended it to be no no no so my other thought uh
look up samuel grubbs on instagram he does a ton of like viral videos with zoom they're all fake
but he tries to make like it's an actual classroom and it's pretty incredible what they do so if you
got a cool classroom you can maybe pull off something like that another thing that would
this is ornery it's ornery um you coordinate with the rest of your classmates to have a little bit of a, like, purposeful,
like pretending like you're cutting out.
Kind of like Jim does, like, just do it and then you'll be fine.
But yeah, I had a question.
Yeah, what is it, Samantha?
Yeah, how do I make, hypotenuse?
It's like, oh, wait, what'd you say?
Okay, so if a squared, and then it's going down,
is that the right answer?
Yeah.
I don't know.
Wait, wait, wait.
No, no, no.
I know what you're talking about, Jake.
All you have to do is multiply the x.
It's kind of hard to do.
Well, you get it.
Maybe practice a few times beforehand. Yeah, practice a few times. Uh-huh. But something like that to where it's like, sorry to do, but you get it. Maybe practice a few times beforehand.
Yeah. Practice a few times, but something like that to where it's like, sorry, you're cutting
out your cut, you know, and then that's kind of honoring. Yeah. Just try to recreate what you
would do a normal classroom on zoom. Have someone pass you something. Hey, can I borrow a pen and
have the person to the left of you pass you a pen? I like that. Or do the Jocelyn do the Jocelyn
where you're like, Hey, give me like to your friend, hey, give me three things I got to say today.
Yes.
Oh, I love stuff like that.
That's a good idea.
And, like, the teacher obviously doesn't know.
Dramatic irony is what that is.
Maybe.
Double entendre.
Maybe.
Yeah, maybe.
All right, next one.
Hello, Jake.
Oh, favorite Parks and Rec character real quick.
I am so sorry.
I think it's harder to tell who my favorite Parks and Rec person is
versus The Office.
I think because it's, like, Leslie, Tom, Andy, all so great. But tell who my favorite parks and rec person is versus the office. I think, um,
cause it's like less like Tom,
Andy also great. But Andy is,
Andy is my favorite.
Is that Chris Pratt?
Yeah.
Gosh.
But I'm thinking about Ron Swanson.
He's a woodworker and that's really cool.
But Andy,
so work though.
Cause you're here.
Are you?
Yeah.
What?
You got a microphone in front of your face.
You're a podcast.
Yeah.
Um,
no.
And Andy's the best.
He's very, very lovable.
He's musical.
He loves life.
I love him for that.
He's a lovable guy.
Thanks, Mary Claire.
Oh, boy.
I should have read the best before date on this milk.
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From the executive producers of Lost.
This place will not break us.
The phenomenon returns to paramount plus
the only way we go home is together from new season now streaming exclusively on paramount plus
and brad this is ali i am best friends with the infamous jocelyn and i first of all just want to
say we're just talking about her thank you for your ridiculous suggestions that have made Sunday mornings so much fun for us and the rest of the band.
Joss is killing it.
But it is time to level up this joke.
And we think we should DM you guys either a word or a phrase or a song lyric that should be added into the podcast somehow.
And if you guys do it, Joss will post it on her stories for the rest of the ghosties to see. Joss. And added to the Josslyn highlight.
Also, just wanted to say, I pulled a Brad this year and quit my ministry job.
Oh.
And will most likely be spending some time in none other than Springfield, Missouri.
No.
So I was wondering if you guys had any suggestions on places to definitely go to and places to definitely avoid.
Thanks for your time.
Love the podcast.
Bye.
Don't love that pulling a Brad means getting out of ministry.
Brad is always talking about it.
He's always encouraging all those listeners.
Get out of ministry while you can.
Gosh.
Like, yeah.
She did quit her job, but the wrong kind of job to quit.
I love the idea.
I understand that.
I think this should be more widespread anyone has permission to dm us something you would like us to say like
a word for us to slip in but if we say it then you have to put on your instagram story like that's
like the whole thing okay like joss is first up yeah but if no one else was doing them's the rules
okay you give us a phrase we work it into a podcast without saying like yeah and grant's
phrase is this.
Right.
And if we say it, you have to like screen recorded on YouTube and put on your story.
Yeah.
Fun fact.
The first live stream we ever did, Steven Swick, while we were, Kirstie's husband, while
we were recording, sent me an Instagram message or whatever.
He's like, if you say these three things, I will Venmo you $5.
Yeah.
And I forget what they were.
One of them was gypsy.
I remember for sure.
Maybe one of them was like armpit or something.
I'll try to find them.
And then you can go back and watch that.
Cause there were,
there was kind of out of context.
I remember afterwards you were like,
yeah,
I was wondering why you randomly said armpit or whatever,
but I was like,
yeah,
I'll take that $5 real quick.
That's the best.
Yeah.
I love doing that.
Yeah.
It's fun.
So I like that idea.
Let's let's do it.
Yeah.
Next week.
Let us know.
All right.
So, oh, Springfield, uh, justice jewelers, favorite, I like that idea. Let's do it. Next week. Let us know.
Springfield.
Justice Jewelers.
My favorite jeweler that I've ever been to in Springfield. If you need him appraised.
That's it. That's all we can do there.
They have the magnifying glass.
You can really look at that diamond.
You go two times, four times, up to 12 times magnification.
It's really good.
It's very nice.
Justice Jewelers.
They have tremendous patience.
Right off 65
right off 65 yeah i would go to let's see abc cafe is that what it's called what is that i don't know
some some china some china no there's like some some like really good like uh what's the is it
orange chicken uh cashew chicken cashew chicken i don't know i'm sure there's a million different
places yeah there's so many but there's like one that my friend loved i've tried hong kong inn was my favorite okay very nice that sounds fun uh we
are the originators of bass pro you should probably go see the wonders of wildlife that's pretty cool
okay what is that it's like a little uh just a pretty immaculate zoo and aquarium and just
wildlife exhibit inside of a bass pro are they mean, it's massive. Are they stuffed?
Are they taxidermied?
Or are they like real?
Like, is there like an aquarium of fish in there and stuff?
Tons of fish, some jellies.
There's some alligators.
What?
Live?
Gators.
Yeah.
Really?
Yeah.
Oh, cool.
Bunch of gators.
I want to go.
I haven't been in a long time.
So I'm kind of like, I don't know if you'll see a cheetah in there, but I think there's
like other animals that you could keep indoors pretty easily.
Cool.
That's nice.
I would love to sometime go to Hong Kong Inn and go to the Wonders of Wildlife with you
and then stay at Stratford.
Yeah.
I'm inviting myself.
Yeah.
Okay.
Okay.
Let's do it.
I'm going to Springfield over.
If you want to not spend Easter with your family and spend it with mine, Isaac and I
are going down there for a pickleball tournament Easter weekend. Nice. We play on Saturday though, so we can come back here for Sunday if you want to not spend Easter with your family and spend it with mine. Isaac and I are going down there for a pickleball tournament.
Easter weekend. We play on Saturday though, so we
can come back here for Sunday if you wanted.
I'll stay with you. Okay, cool.
Easter's not a big deal in my family.
Right on. Yeah, because you quit your job in ministry.
Yeah, exactly. Oh, it's going to be so nice
not going to church this year for Easter, dude.
I don't have to.
Just kidding. I quit my job.
That's right. that's pretty sweet though
that you're in Springfield
I mean definitely
check out Bolivar
definitely check out
Stratford
gotta go to BOMO
BOMO
that's what we call it
nice
yeah go to Stratford
go to Stratford
go to Stratford
and go to somewhere
public and say you know
Jake and see what
their reaction is
I would love
I would love to hear
a story about that
that would be cool
yeah
I mean
because they might know you
they probably would.
Me or my dad
or someone in my family.
Trish.
Trish.
Yeah.
Oh yeah,
she's one of the mouse pad.
Yes.
That's right.
That's her.
She's one of the ones
using DOS still.
Okay,
go on to the next one.
Howdy,
Jake and Brad.
My name is Ray Woods.
I am from Branson,
Missouri,
originally,
but am currently a freshman at the university
of arkansas anyways i'm playing in my first intramural pickleball tournament tonight
mad hype for it um if y'all are ghosties living in the fable area and want to play some pickleball
hit me up that'd be super fun or if you just want to catch some vibes that'd be fun too
my question for y'all is if you guys were a freshman going to
college during a literal plague how would you guys go about making friends plague um lastly
shout out to my sister raleigh woods love you brother all right y'all have a good day bye bye
i like that shout out to my sister riley love brother. Let's do that with you. Like, hey, sissy. Maybe not. No?
Okay.
We'll see.
You don't like it.
Ray?
Ray.
Ray Woods.
Maybe Ray's brother.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah.
I love your movie, Ray.
First of all, one of my favorite people in the world, shout out, Peter Koring, is a freshman
at Arkansas.
The comforts of him.
Yeah.
He's awesome.
He's a Lambda Chi.
He was in my Bible study for a long time.
He's a stud.
Shout out to Peter and Matty Slaughter as well,
freshman at Arkansas.
Really?
Yeah.
Okay, so get in touch with them.
Seriously.
Become their friends.
They're fun people.
They've got serious vibes.
Very good vibes.
Get some vibes out of there, dude.
Very clean vibes.
I mean, they clean them all the time.
They're like a dog's mouth of vibes.
They're the dog's mouth of the vibe world
of Fayetteville, Arkansas.
No scrape.
Well, yeah, that's a good question, Ray.
Because it is a rare time that we're living in now that you guys are having to connect
and that you're choosing to connect socially via electronics.
Because for the longest time, these kids kids these whether they probably 18 years old now
They haven't been exposed to electronics. They have this is this is brand new. This is brand new
They're like, what do I do if I can't talk to somebody face to face? And so it's like I really appreciate this question
Yeah, because man, it's it is hard for them to figure this out. Ray is definitely a pioneer woman, right?
I think yeah raised in a log cabin Ray Drummond
Somebody's gonna love that joke. Not you, but somebody.
Yeah.
Read a lot of Lorraine goes wilder probably.
Oh yeah.
Has a nice handmade dress that goes down to her shoes.
Little house on the pray ray.
There it is.
Yeah.
That's not bad.
That's not bad.
Pray ray.
That's a little more broad, funny joke.
Ray, here's what you do you start making really weird hyper specific facebook
groups that deal with things in arkansas right no way ray even has a facebook i don't know why
the facebook account first great facebook it's the facetimes.com great account and yeah you're
gonna make a group called like the milk in the cafeteria kind of tastes weird sometimes right
right yeah you got the right idea right that's the name of the group so to make a group called like, the milk in the cafeteria kind of tastes weird sometimes, right? Right?
Yeah, you got to put it right at the end, right?
That's the name of the group.
So you make the group, you know, cover photo, profile picture.
You make it look all nice.
You put one post in like the discussion tab.
And it's the milk in the cafeteria kind of tastes weird sometimes, right?
That's the only post in there.
And then you start inviting your friends to it.
And then you start a discussion.
Yeah.
And then you sample it. And then you respond on there like hey tuesday milk's good
you start a community just about the milk in the cafeteria because you got it you got a little
community there and then you start another one like there's a lot of cracks in our sidewalk
right right the hilarious thing is that out of all people i know maddie slaughter that girl i
mentioned she would absolutely do this. She's weird enough.
She's got weird vibes.
Yeah.
She loves going to like drive to the Duggars house in Fayetteville and just
like take people there.
The Duggars live in Fayetteville?
I guess.
Or maybe outside of it.
Or they live in Arkansas for sure.
They got like 15 kids.
That's an Arkansas thing.
Oh,
so yeah,
of course.
Yeah.
Yeah.
So yeah.
Good luck,
Ray.
I don't know why that came to mind,
but yeah,
just really specific Facebook groups. I mean, you're playing, you're in a pickup ball in a real league. I mean,
that's how I met everyone was playing insane volleyball in college. So use your sports to
your advantage. Yeah. You'll be fine. Yeah. Do you, can you think of any Facebook groups that
you were in back in the day? Like very specific ones? I mean, all of my Facebook likes were all
just like movies and books and stuff like that. But like groups you were never in, like,
I remember specifically kind of what you're saying. Like I had a literal exact one
like that. There was one time we had a conversation in the cafeteria about raw carrots versus cooked
carrots. Oh, okay. And I was like me and a couple other people were like pretty passionate about
raw carrots being better than like the mushy cooked ones. And some girl made a Facebook group
about it. And I'm probably still in it. I don't know. This kind of sounds familiar. You've said this before.
Maybe I've said that already.
Yeah.
Oh, that's funny.
I don't think it was anything like that.
I don't know where that idea just came from,
but who knows?
Next one?
Next one.
Hey, Jake and Brad.
Hi.
This is Gabriel from Illinois.
I've been listening to the podcast
for probably about six months now
and I've enjoyed it a lot.
I get a lot of good laughs
two trimesters um i know this isn't really a question but i see that you guys are pretty good
at you know kind of rhyming on the spot and making some good puns i think you guys would be good at
it i think it'd be funny if you guys just did a rap battle you know get a beat going and get some
vibes in here get some vibes but anyway that's it. Keep up the good work. Oh, gosh.
Every time...
I always want this to go better than it does.
Well, no, I was about to say, like, every time
someone asks me to do something like this,
I always think, this must be how Jake feels when
they say, hey, will you sing this part of the jingle?
Like, this is like... Because I'm like, I don't
want to do this. I'm going to be so bad at this.
Every time. Like, you could sing that
Prince of Egypt song. I don't want to sing that Prince of Egypt song. Yeah, thanks for sending the... Like, a lot of people time like you could sing that Prince of Egypt song
Thanks for sending the like a lot of people have sent in like Prince of Egypt jingle parodies I don't think we're gonna do that unless I learn the Prince of Egypt song cuz Jake doesn't really want to do it
That's okay
That's I'll do this, but Jake's just gonna whoop my bottom still though
I mean it's just like it's so hard to do this on the fly and we're so white that just make it always sound
so bad
Instead of traditional rap battling Brad. What do you think about like rap affirming?
Encouraging raps. I think that's how I always do it. Okay. Yeah, and the very few times of rap rap affirmed
Yeah, so I don't know what Gabriel had in mind. But yeah, I think this is like a rap battle based on
You notice our wings to bear really Really? Yeah. And just,
uh,
trying to encourage each other.
All right.
So I just typed in rap instrumental YouTube.
I'm going to let you decide,
Brad,
do you want hard rap instrumental,
hip hop,
rap,
trap instrumental,
or freestyle rap beat?
Hard rap instrumental.
Hard rap instrumental.
It has hard,
hard in it.
It's just,
yeah,
it's all for me.
It's got a guy in a hoodie.
He looks cool.
What color hoodie?
Yellow.
Okay.
Is that fine? Yeah, it's okay. Okay. It's not as hard as I want it to be, but it's, yeah, got a guy in a hoodie he looks what color hoodie yellow okay is that fine yeah it's okay okay it's not as hard as i wanted to be but it's yeah it's kind of a mustard yellow
so who knows how this is gonna go let's just do no edits we're just going can we just can we be
like really mean when we're affirming though yeah like hard i'm talking hard i'm talking
hard affirm yeah hard mattress affirm just a couple bars at a time it'll
this brother right here wants to mess with me huh he's always one of my best friends Yeah. Hard mattress affirm. Just a couple bars at a time.
This brother right here wants to mess with me?
Huh?
He's always one of my best friends?
I guess he forgot.
Yeah.
Most creative guy in Kansas City right here.
Hmm.
Huh.
I can't really tell when... Like...
Oh!
Yeah.
This my friend down here in the basement.
Challenged me to rap battle
Guess he forgot about the placement
Of me on the friendship
Numero uno
Don't you forget it
Or I will sumo
Wrestle you and let you win
Cause I love you brother
You are my best friend
Don't forget it
Gosh you're so good at this
Don't forget it Brad
Don't forget it
You are my best friend
Man I'm really bad at thinking really, really quick
But I think your hair looks really, really sick
And you have Old Spice that's really thick
And we know that you like Steven Swick
And we are both friends with him
His name is Steven
And we go together like Louis Stevens
And we like it when we talk about the podcast
And because the podcast is really fun to do with you
Uh, bruh, I guess you forgot that
When you put on that hat, boy, you lookin' hot
Uh, yeah, yeah, you, you bagged your dough
Yeah, you show her off, she's a show
Show, trophy wife, uh, trophy wife
Yeah, you bagged her for life
And, yeah, you got a pretty daughter
You slaughter anyone who touch her, She's an otter. Yeah
Yeah, I think you're really witty
I think you have nice clothes that aren't really bad to look at and like when we do this recording together with Peter upstairs
Because we are friends with Peter because we're both genuine guys, but I think you're really more genuine than me
I with your eyes and then when you look at me with that nose, I see the nostrils
and they look real nice.
The beat goes out,
but I don't.
No.
Oh, switch it up a little bit.
Right at camp, always writing goodies,
but I'm looking at him and he's wearing
that black hoodie and I, uh,
yeah, I swapped to dust and I'm trying not to, but I think I'm lookin' at him and he's wearin' that black hoodie And I, uh, yeah, I swiped to dust
And I, I'm tryin' not to but I think I'm feelin' lustful
Look at him, look at him while he dancin'
Look at him, look at him while he prancin'
Ay, ay, good luck, good luck
Lookin' as good as bad while he's wearin' the Ducks hat
You know we got this beat that's hard
Jake played basketball, he's a point guard
And he liked to play baseball
no doubt he was always going like mike mike trout hey hey we like jake cuz he's from strafford
missouri and he is in a hurry but he will always take time to listen to you even when you have
tough times he'll be like yo bro i got you i got you i got you he got me hey he got me time i got you oh i time i got me
i like that rap that jake does with the rapping so something i liked it jake you you started and
i thought we were gonna go like one line at a time and you spit out like 85 lines probably and i was like okay i can't do that
very well i go i go about i go about two rhymes and then i'm like i'm just gonna talk while the
rap goes dude it's just so scary like you're just saying things you're like i don't know what the
end of the sins is my trout my trout worked and it's coming up really soon yeah oh my trout i was
like oh doubt trap yeah i would love to be able to do that like really really well like that would
be so fun if you could just do that for minutes at a time.
Is that what we do for vibe?
You're wearing vibes.
You're wearing,
or what do you mean that?
Like we practice this.
Like we've talked,
I've talked about it before,
but I think if I listen to that beat every single day while I'm driving,
I think I could get pretty good.
Patreon.
Let's start freestyle rap.
Let's do it.
The patrons be like,
please don't,
please stop.
Please.
You don't have to post this.
Please clap. Yeah. I'll try it. I'll try it out please don't. Please stop. Please quit this. You don't have to post this. Please clap.
Yeah, I'll try it.
I'll try it out.
It'd just be fun to get better at.
What about that girl?
The TikTok girl that does all the raps?
Oh, yeah.
Sarah Maddock.
Yeah, she follows us.
Does she listen to the pod?
Sarah, do you listen to the pod?
Sarah, I think you at least follow us on Ghost Runners Podcast on Instagram.
We're not verified, but she still follows us.
Yeah, it's con.
But she does. What was the funny one that she did follows us. Yeah, it's con, but she does. What
was the funny one that she did with the
elephants and the oranges or something? I watched that
when I was on TikTok for like three days and I
was like, that is awesome. You
guys probably know she's got like a million on TikTok. So
you guys might know her, but
yeah, we'll get her on Patreon. We'll get her
cool. All right.
Thanks, Gabriel.
My hands are so cool. Jake and Brad. This is Mike Trout, dude. All right. Thanks, Gabriel. My hands are so cold.
Hello, Jake and Brad.
This is Abby and Kurt from Charleston, South Carolina.
I love your podcast.
I just finished all of the episodes.
I started listening probably in fall of 2020.
I love them.
It's 2021 now.
You guys are hilarious.
Almost.
So my younger brother just moved to new york to do college and there's so much snow
there right now and it's super cold so my question is kind of related to that i was wondering how
much snow has fallen um where you guys lived um at a time like in all your years of living there, how much snow has fallen
on the ground at one time.
You want like a doppler right now?
Love your podcast.
Thank you for all the time you take to record it and hope you have a great day.
Bye bye.
Dude, one of my favorite things about Southern people are their fascination with snow.
Yeah.
Like, oh, look at this.
They got like the Instagram,
the boomerang going of like the,
you know, half inch winter wonderland.
And people from the coast
are also fascinated by tornadoes
or more just like terrified of tornadoes.
Sure.
Like they think like,
so how many of your family members
have died from tornadoes?
Right.
It's like,
they actually don't happen that often.
yeah,
surely you see them at least like,
you have a basement.
Oh yeah.
Oh my gosh.
Dude,
that's how I feel about earthquakes though.
Like earthquakes.
I don't really know what's going on.
It's not really scary to me.
Gosh,
Abby,
what a question.
I love that you start to voice mobile.
I just sharing your enthusiasm.
I've listened to every episode.
Like,
like this is our one chance to ask us a question.
I've listened to every episode.
How much snow have you ever seen?
It was very sweet.
Yeah.
Thank you for listening.
And you're welcome to send another voice memo.
That's not your only chance, obviously.
It's funny, and I might be wrong,
but it's funny seeing people's names on here that I've seen
on Instagram DMs.
I feel like I know you a little bit.
She's a YouTube commenter.
Okay, that's what it is.
Thank you, Abby, for all your participations.
Tremendous participations.
Thanks, you guys.
So, yeah.
Snow, first of all,
I will say like
Northeastern people
think that the Midwest
is like just,
or probably Northern people too,
but like the Midwest,
we think like six inches of snow
is like a good amount of snow.
They laugh at that.
They're like,
six inches?
Wake me up when she rolls over
kind of thing.
Like, give me two feet
and I'll cancel school. Yeah. You know, so I think me up when she rolls over kind of thing. Like, yeah, give me, give me two feet and I'll,
I'll cancel school.
Yeah.
You know,
so I think,
I think we're kind of in the middle range there.
As far as that goes,
like we're the,
we're the Baker Mayfield of snow.
Yeah.
Maybe it's 12th.
Right.
Like a solid 12th,
but then maybe in a couple of years we'll be like pretty low.
Cause I don't think Baker Mayfield's going to stay around,
but it's just a,
is that a commentary on climate change? Is that what that was?
No, maybe. Yeah. Yes, it was. Yeah, it was. Absolutely. It was. I'll take a stance.
Climate change. I buy it. I buy it. I don't know. Anyway. I don't know. We don't get that much.
I will say like, it's not, it's not rare, but it's also not common. It's just, it truly is like,
like some years we'll get five snow days in a year. Other years it's like rare but it's also not common it's just it truly is like like some years we'll get five
snow days in a year other years it's like you get you don't get any so my senior year we didn't get
any and i was pretty irked yeah because that's the year you don't have to make it up the next
year yeah so it's like please just give them all you're very aware of snow days under senior year
i'm very aware of how many you've missed how many you should have missed what What's worse? What, what's, what's, what's more extreme eating poop?
Yeah,
dude,
I know,
I know,
I know.
I hate,
I hate it.
I hate that.
I told 500,000 people this.
Um,
so what's like more,
I don't even know what the right word to ask this question is,
but,
um,
realizing you have a snow day or thinking you have a snow day and not having
a snow day like what is like a higher higher or lower low you know what i mean because i feel like
thinking you you're gonna have something and then not having it is really really rough true i'm gonna
go with uh having a snow day is a more extreme feeling just because yeah there's that instant like oh my gosh
we still have to go to school but then once you get to school it's like still like a normal fun
day i think sure but that like 30 minutes of like dang all right i guess i'll shower and go to
school yeah that's definitely not great but then once you get there it's fine whereas the snow day
like the whole day is fun yes that's a good time and like these days like who knows how they're
like getting notified like like back in the day it was was always like, you had to wait. It was like Odessa. Oh, wait. Yeah. Yeah. We were always like,
uh, uh, what was it? Stoutland Stockton. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. And if you saw like,
like if we saw those Springs, well, yeah. Or yeah. Like, yeah. Like the old Latham,
like the Bible church. No, all the churches would put their thing in there. Like, oh, weird. You
have a, you have a tiny church. You don't the churches would put their thing in there. Like, Oh, weird. You have a,
you have a tiny church.
You don't need to be wasting this timeline on here.
I think nowadays the superintendent just does a tick tock.
It just like throws a little dance out there when he's like pointing at like
the captions,
no school till tomorrow.
Stay at home.
Yeah.
Or it's like class is still tomorrow,
but no afternoon sports.
And it's like doing all these things.
Yeah.
When they point and the words come up.
Yeah. That's what the superintendent things. Yeah. When they point and the words come up. Yeah.
That's what the superintendent does.
Yeah.
Um,
anyway,
but I,
I,
I love,
I love getting like the text back in the day.
Like if my friends saw it before me and they're like,
it's like,
you better.
Yeah.
Then you're like,
I don't believe it.
And then you look at the TV.
Oh man.
Or like when your mom comes and you feel her like turn off your alarm.
And I,
I got,
my mom was like, you have a snow day. Like my mom was so sweet, like so sweet. Like how she talked to me
in the morning because she knows I'm not a morning person. You have a snow day. And then you just
kind of, you just kind of smile and nuzzle back in. Yeah, we do. Yeah, we do. Oh, that's good.
No, you're right. I think you're right. The extreme happiness is better. Yeah. All right.
So thanks Abby. Good question. What is up bratty daddy and jake and bake well i've been listening for a
while now since episode 22 decided to call in um this week because you guys are talking about
celebrities and then brad had that gorgeous maroon 5 cover yeah and my claim to fame
along with being the mascot of the university of over 40,000 students, so stink it SBU, is that I have met and played rock, paper, scissors with Adam Levine.
Yep, I was in the Super Bowl halftime show a couple years ago when I was in Atlanta, because that's where I'm from.
By the way, Chris here, forgot to introduce. Awkward, awkward. Gotta move on. But yeah, so if you guys could meet and play rock, paper, scissors with any celebrity,
who would it be?
And do you think you would win?
Love you guys.
Sorry about the Super Bowl.
Oh, geez.
Chris, at least tell us where you're the mascot at.
He's from Atlanta.
40,000 people.
Georgia?
No, they got more than that.
You think?
I think.
40,000 is a lot.
I'm trying not to say I think, but I do think.
Georgia Tech.
No, Georgia Tech way smaller.
They're more selective.
They're like downtown Atlanta.
Yeah.
UGA attendance?
Is that the right word?
Admissions peoples.
What is that called?
Capacity.
Dude, it's got to be Georgia.
39,147.
So he lied a little bit, but it's probably UGA.
Yeah, way to round up.
Yeah, go Dawgs. Go Toon Brothers., but it's probably UGA. Yeah, way to round up. Yeah, go Dawgs.
Go Toon Brothers.
Yeah, and everyone loves Ugga the most anyway.
Like, everyone's just looking for the real bulldog.
We don't need you.
Yeah.
And I'm a Jackets fan, so I'll go ahead and say I'm a Jackets fan.
Katie Kennedy, the wife of my employer.
Calvin Johnson, Al Tigner, my buddy.
Yeah.
Yeah.
That one, Jarrett Jack.
Jarrett.
Dude, no, Jarrett Jack hurt hurt they they beat ku to go to the
final four sorry thanks for bringing it up dude sorry about super bowl uh i'm gonna answer this
question reverse i would definitely win rock paper scissors i just don't know who i would play yet
jason pierre paul is like an obvious choice like that would that would be tough for him
we could also go michael j fox we've been talking about him a lot on this podcast. He might be fun to play against.
I don't know.
Let me just tell you my strategy
and then maybe I'll think
of who I'd play against.
I love getting people's head.
Right before you're about to play,
like five seconds before it's showtime,
you say,
you go scissors,
I'll go paper.
And then they're like,
wait, what?
Wait, then I would just win.
And then you like go around it.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
And then they go paper
and you go scissors. I always do that. I always say, hey, I'm going rock, FYI. I'm going rock. Yeah. And then just mess with win. And then you like go around it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then they go paper and you go scissors.
I always do that.
I always say, hey, I'm going rock, FYI.
I'm going rock.
Yeah.
And then just mess with them.
Don't go rock.
This is kind of random.
I don't know the celebrity.
I don't care.
I'll play anybody and I'll do fine against them maybe.
What if you and I just had like a running wager of playing tic-tac-toe against each other for $100?
Dude, well, can we do a different game? Tic-tac-toe against each other for a hundred dollars dude well because i think we do a different game tic-tac-toe sucks it's like not a good game i'm surprised it's even
popular no but that's the point is like it's so hard to win if you don't go first to win
well it's hard to win no matter what i feel like especially if you don't go first though exactly
it's impossible that's why i'm saying like we have a hundred dollars because like it would never
happen unless like there's one day where one of us, it'd probably be me that's spaced out or something.
It did something different.
And then we just don't play again.
Yeah.
For a hundred bucks.
Wow.
Okay.
Okay.
I think I'm going to beat you.
So you go top right every time.
That's why I always start with.
It's, I mean, you play it safe.
You go in the middle.
Do you?
But if you want to win, you got to go top right.
Top left.
You got to go corner.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Have you ever seen that video of two people?
It was at an NBA, like Portland Trailblazers game.
And it was like these two girls.
And every time they made a shot, they got.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
We did that.
They did.
And like, they were so bad.
Like, it was like, yeah, there were so many times they either could block somebody or
like get tic-tac-toe and they messed up.
Kind of funny.
Look it up.
Kind of funny.
I would play. Who's somebody really smart that we like mark zuckerberg i would play zuck yeah yeah i'd say zuck you after i beat him oh would you maybe that's good yeah i'm sure he's
never heard it probably not jake from state farm i think i've talked about this before i don't have
a huge allure to celebrities like i i would like to meet certain people, I guess, cause I think they're kind of interesting,
but like,
I don't know if I like my friends.
I'd rather hang out with my,
I'd rather play tic-tac-toe with you,
Jake,
then hang out with LeBron James and play tic-tac-toe with wine in my hand or
something.
What about taco?
Kind of this thing.
Taco Tuesdays.
Yeah,
sure.
I don't know.
I'm going to try to come up with the answer.
Who would I want to,
I think just someone Australian, come up with an answer. Who would I want to?
I think just someone Australian.
Just to hear the accent.
I want somebody that's like far away.
Like Patrick Mahomes is like one of my favorite people right now, but he's like literally miles away from me right now.
Yeah, I might bump into him at Kohl's someday.
Exactly.
He's a big Kohl's guy.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And so, yeah, somebody Australian.
Keith Urban.
Is he?
Oh, is he?
Oh.
Oh, yeah. Well.. Keith Urban. Is he? Oh, is he? Oh. Oh, yeah.
Well.
Jacob.
Hey, Jacob.
You won the rock, paper, scissors, so you go first.
I think that's good Australian.
I think that's perfect.
I think that's perfect.
I think that's exactly how you do it.
Okay, let's move on.
Jake and Brad, what is up?
It's Maggie. I had sent y'all a voice memo a few weeks ago
about turned first date spirit. So I had another question for y'all. So when I was in grad school,
I lived with nine friends and we went to class together, studied together. We switched rooms every two
weeks. And at night we would play games. And so one of the games that we played in this house
was sardines in the dark. So we would turn off all the lights, close all the blinds,
put tape over the microwave and oven lights. And we had so much fun. We laughed so hard.
So my question for y'all is,
is there a game that you played as a kid,
but playing it as an adult is so much more fun?
All right.
Bye.
That's awesome.
You and your roommates would switch rooms.
Two weeks is a lot.
Yeah.
That's really fun though.
That's sweet.
I love sardines. Me too. Murder in the though. That's sweet. I love sardines.
Me too.
Murder in the dark sardines.
I love those games.
I don't know how to play that one.
I never,
I never got into that with you guys.
That's okay.
Um,
sardines.
I had the tradition,
like if I was not the person hiding,
I would just go and hide somewhere and see people and pretend.
And then like,
wait a second,
where's Lauren?
It's like, gotcha.
So that's kind of fun i how they must
live in like a mansion maybe yeah um that's really fun though i like laser tag a lot um
and as a kid it was fun but as an adult i think it's just as fun if not more fun that's a good
answer tic-tac-toe um you know as a kid i wasn't wagering 100 this time it's like this is real
this is fun so This is fun.
Maybe I was that way with chess.
Still really loving chess.
I like that a lot right now.
Go-karts.
Oh, go-karts.
Those will never not be fun.
I love getting thrown out of a go-kart place.
That's my goal every time.
Yeah, get blacklisted.
Like, stop bumping, stop bumping.
And I'll just act like I don't understand what they're saying. What?
What?
Que?
This is que?
Anyway.
Yeah.
Those are good answers.
Yeah.
I don't know.
Most things.
I enjoy most things I do nowadays.
I'm trying to think off the top of my head.
Magic tricks.
Loved those a lot when I was a kid.
Still like showing people magic tricks.
Oh, yeah.
I have a really good one.
Did you get into those for a while at K-Life?
Was that you?
It was before. There were some other some other people too that were into him but it was before uh summer of 2016 my skit character at canna cook
that summer was going to be a russian magician oh okay and i needed to have a few tricks so i
would try him out at k-life yeah yeah that's good we had a we had a magician bad guy was your were
you a bad guy yeah yeah i didn't really like being the villain but i was one year yeah tony wonder
was this guy's character from Arrested Development.
Yeah.
It was so funny.
He got a W muster or goatee thing going on.
Alan Tigner, shout out Georgia Tech.
Hey, here we go, Jackets.
Yeah.
All right, next one.
Hey, Jake and Brad.
This is Price from Greenville, South Carolina.
Price.
South Carolina.
And I had to call in and leave my first voice memo after hearing Brad's new segment last
week called I Don't Buy It. I Don't Buy buy it and he was talking about how certain items had to be
refrigerated after they were opened i remember that didn't really make sense to him well
uh apparently shortly after my brother married my sister-in-law um they were coming home from
the grocery store and getting everything unpacked and uh she started to take the lids off of like
salsa and salad dressing and
condiments and then screw them back on and put everything away in the refrigerator. My brother's
just standing there watching. He asks her, what are you doing? And she said, Oh, you know,
these items say, and she thought that you had to open the items before they could be put in
the refrigerator. She explained it had something to do with the pressure,
and she just always thought it made sense to her.
That does make sense.
And my whole family gets a kick out of this every time.
And I thought you guys would too.
All right.
Bye.
Like, I can't fault that lady at all.
It's the air pressure.
Logically, it says refrigerator.
Because I was trying to think, like, burn after reading.
And I was trying to, like, compare them.
But literally, you burn it after you read. like, like I can't even make a joke about
that.
That's, that's, that's where you're.
So if it says refrigerator after opening, refrigerate it after you open.
I think all of us should take a good hard look in the mirror and wonder if we should
be doing that the same way.
Yeah.
If that's the case, then great.
Do that.
But don't, don't do one or the other.
Don't flip flop.
That's crazy.
That's hilarious.
Yeah.
That's pretty funny. Cause it's like you were but you were buying these things a lot of them
on the shelf so they weren't they weren't refrigerated there they hadn't been opened yet
right but once yeah if you're gonna refrigerate them you gotta release that pressure you just
want to initiate it maybe honestly maybe that is why you don't do that like don't do what don't
refrigerate things that are like locked up you know like unopened you're
not freezing them though i know that's true because like you know like you put a pop can in
the freezer it pop or it pop oh that oh no wonder it's sodas everywhere western that's why they call
them that or if you leave a couple cream sodas in your old toyota camry in the winter they will
also pop yeah i did that with some monsters one time dude sick dude get some vibes in the winter, they will also pop. Yeah, I did that with some monsters one time. Dude, sick.
Dude, dude.
Get some vibes in the backseat.
It was sweet, dude.
It was sweet.
Tony Hank was there.
Tony Hank.
Hey, man.
Come on.
You want to get some monsters, dude?
They're in the floorboard.
Yeah.
Everywhere.
Yeah.
Just lick the board, bro.
It's not poop.
Nope.
Oh, gosh.
That's a fun story, though.
I mean, yeah, that's one of those, like, never going to live it down. Yeah, that's perfect. That's a fun story, though. I mean, that's one of those, like, never going to live it down.
Yeah, that's perfect.
That's great.
Let's do one more.
Okay.
Hey, guys.
Josh here from Springfield, Missouri.
Let's go.
Listening to this podcast.
Springfield in South Carolina.
Something I've believed to be true for some amount of time.
There is something I like to refer to as the reverse
Bermuda Triangle of the Midwest, formed by Edmond, Oklahoma, Springfield, Missouri, and Kansas City.
Within this triangle, the outside world simply does not exist.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but this is what I have observed I love the show
love what you guys are doing
it's good to hear some absolutely
hilarious content from two
good Christian guys
and keep
it up alright let's go
alright sometimes we get challenged
with our voice memos like Brad
do you mind if I make some
edits to my I don't buy it from earlier?
I would like to go and throw in, let me go find a word real quick.
Whatever the shizzle Josh just said, I would like that to be included in I don't buy it.
You don't buy it.
You think there's life outside of that?
I don't even know what he was saying.
I guess he's saying like in the Midwest, it seems like everyone lives within the boundaries
of Edmond to Springfield to Kansas City
the reverse Bermuda Triangle
because Bermuda Triangle is like oh what goes
on there planes crash ships
wreck in here it's like oh
no planes are
crashing no planes are no ships are wrecking
that's for sure no ships landlocked
hard Table Rock though
oh sure sure
ships on Table Rock
boats small vessels yeah this is tough Hard. Table rock, though. Oh, sure. Sure. Ships on table rock?
Boats.
Small vessels.
Yeah.
This is tough.
This is... I don't know what to say.
I will say...
I've been outside the reverse funeral triangle.
As have I.
You have?
Yeah.
How was it?
Honestly, I don't remember.
Couldn't tell you.
One of the most fun things to do if you ever meet somebody from Edmond, Oklahoma, fun fact,
is just say, it's a great place to grow.
Because that's what it says.
Welcome to Edmond, a great place to grow.
It's their slogan.
And if you say that, you will be in.
They're like, oh, how'd you know?
It is a great place to grow.
Yeah.
And they will love you forever.
All you got to say, great place to grow.
Yeah.
Oh, Edmond?
Yeah, great place to grow.
Oh, Edmond.
Trey Kennedy.
Who?
Sorry, I said great place to grow. Great place to grow yeah edmund yeah great place to grow oh edmund trey kennedy who sorry i said
sorry great place to grow yeah great place great place to great place to great place to go go
docs yeah 40 000 39 actually let's do one can we do one more that was great thank you that was
really kind what you said at the end there josh but Josh, I'm sorry I'm unable to elaborate on what you said.
I'm a little confused.
But that's cool you live in Springfield.
Go Green County.
Go Drury.
Sure.
They're kind of our rivals.
Oh, go Missouri State.
Let's go Bears.
Go Jennings.
Here we go.
Last one.
Maybe.
Hey, Jake and Brad.
It's your girl Grace from Great Falls, Montana.
It's our girl.
And quick shout out to this guy named Cameron who several episodes back also left a voice memo on your show.
And he is also from my home city.
I have no idea who you are, Cameron.
But you're another ghostie in my home city.
So I just wanted to say hey.
Hey.
And maybe hit me up, especially if you're single.
Because dating sucks in Great Falls.
Anyways, the real reason why I'm here, Jake and Brad, I need your help.
So all of my friends have like really funny, witty Instagram bios and mine is just nothing.
I have nothing in my bio.
So I just need a quick quote from you, something like witty and random and hilarious and totally ghost runners.
So I know you guys will do an amazing job.
Help me out, please.
I need something to put there.
Anyways, I love what you guys do.
And thank you so much for your show.
It makes me just that much better.
I'm running out of time.
She was running out of time.
I think people should do that more often even if they're not running out of time.
Just cut it off. I'm running out of time. So I should do that more often even if they're not running out of time just cut it off i'm running out of time so i guess last thing i would end with
yep uh first of all i don't remember the guy's name that she shouted out cameron cameron if
if cameron and grace get married i promise i'll go to your wedding i will dance so hard if anybody
gets married because of the ghost runners podcast we will be there with bells on baby we will we will dance covered in
feathers yeah waving that rainbow flag what's that bro michael's talking to oscar about uh like
gay pride and everything he's like if i was gay i would be the most flamboyant leading the parade
covered in feathers anyway i would totally go to your wedding, Grace,
or anybody else that wants to get married from the Ghost Runners.
Anybody else?
Can you imagine?
What if I marry a Ghost Runner?
Yeah.
Listener.
I would go.
Dude, that's awesome.
I'd give you a million dollars if I was real.
Dude, that's awesome.
You'd give me a million dollars.
Like, congratulations on your wedding.
Here's another million.
I'll give you a second million dollars.
You'd be like, Brad, you already gave us a million dollars.
Do you remember giving me a million?
I know, I know.
And I'm like in my tux, like, hey, hey, I know. I know, I know. I know. And then I'm like, Brad, you already gave us a million dollars. Do you remember giving me a million? I know, I know. And I'm like in my tux, like, hey, I know.
I know, I know.
I know.
And then I'm like, I got to go.
My pilot's ready to leave.
Yeah.
So the real question was, oh, the quote.
I have an idea.
You have one?
Always.
So on Instagram, the only place you can really put a link is in your bio.
And so what you should do is this.
You should do a timestamp to the YouTube video for this episode for this exact moment and say, and in quotation marks, grace, you should put this in your bio.
And then you click on that and it, and it goes to that part where I just said,
grace, you should put this in your bio. That's my idea. So her Instagram bio is,
click the link below and go to this timestamp.
No.
Yeah.
The Instagram.
No, you put the YouTube in there.
You can put a timestamp in a URL.
Come on, Jake.
You know this.
Oh, yeah.
She doesn't need to put the timestamp.
You're right.
I see.
I see.
I see.
Yeah.
Okay.
Yeah.
So you just click on the link
and it'll go to that exact place.
So she has nothing in her bio still?
It's just a link? No, it says, Grace, you should put this in your bio. And then you click on it and it says'll go to that exact place. So she has nothing in her bio still.
It's just a link.
No,
it says grace.
You should put this in your bio and then you click on it and it says the exact same thing.
Grace,
put this in your bio.
Don't hate on my idea.
It's funny. No,
it's good.
I don't know why I had so much trouble understanding it.
Yeah.
I didn't,
I didn't do a great,
I don't know.
Yeah.
Now you get it.
That's fun.
That's kind of fun.
It's quirky.
Yeah.
Different.
Great.
You put this in your bio.
Cause then they're like,
okay,
what's this link?
And it's just the same thing.
It's like,
how'd they get that?
Great.
You put this in your bio. Yeah, it's good
I was just trying to think of former bios I had before I put the ghost runners in my bio cuz I think that helps
But yeah, you always had like clever witty things. Yeah, like every two weeks. I had like a new joke in there
Actually, let me check my Twitter. I would usually get it from there. Try remember one
I know I had one that said this is my least favorite dating app. Goodwill hunting. Is that the is that one?
That's my facebook bio actually. Okay. Why do we call it thrift dating app. Goodwill hunting. Is that the, is that one? That's my Facebook bio actually.
Okay.
Why do we call it thrift shopping instead of Goodwill hunting?
Yes.
That's a good one.
Back when I was doing the Tinder trolling stuff, my old bio was, I've said it before
in the podcast.
Did you know that if you took out someone's intestines and stretched them out end to end,
you would go to jail?
That's a good anti-joke.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Like you're expecting one punchline, you get another one.
Now I'm just looking at my Twitter this isn't really helping
Screaming it's not what it looks like every time someone walks in the room regardless of what I'm doing. That's a funny thought yeah
No, I just I'm on YouTube yeah
Dude, I was so scared of someone walking in on me like two nights ago. I
Was like what is
like it's for work i swear uh train i made a video called timeline of tv and one of the things was
like uh in the 2000s was this relatable to you you just like wake up in the middle of the night
comedy central is on you fall asleep watch a talladega nights or something yeah yeah and you
wake up to like a girls gone wild commercial this can be on tv yeah so i youtubed girl's gone wild
commercial just to rip the audio from it yeah and put it in the background of like a video but yeah
for like those 90 seconds i was like no one walk in my room please be hard to explain
trey asked me to he he has weird requests yeah he's from edmund what can you say great place to
grow hello that's good okay so yeah there's some answers uh
great you should put this in your bio that is all the voice memos for this week there's been so many
i guess kind of a direct correlation makes sense as the podcast grows we're getting a lot of voice
memos so we're trying our best to keep up with them we're doing almost everyone every week but
um i also don't want the podcast we've been going so long recently which i'm sure you guys enjoy but
let us know if you don't yeah in a personal message we don't need to we don't need
to berate us publicly that's good uh brad would you like to not in this episode with jingle yet
because we need to have reviews of the week yeah my review of the week is from bria shit
yeah dang it this is my voice okay you go i'll find a new one. Oh, shoot. Yeah, okay. I'll take it.
Bria Schatzeder.
Should have been a voice memo, it says.
Hey guys, my brother told me that he would finally watch Arrested Development if I listened to your podcast.
Hey brother, said in Buster's voice.
Hey brother.
Random fact, Arrested Development, overrated.
I'll say it.
I said it right now.
We can talk about it later if you want to.
It's the first one I've ever listened to and boy, did you guys set set the bar high it's the kind of pod that makes you want to get on
your feet and do mediocre housework every monday that's what we strive for we couldn't get enough
laughs from one soda week so i bought him a patreon subscription for christmas thank you
patreon.com slash ghost runners i've been treating i've been trying to leave a voicemail for a week
now and it just won't record i'm like are you stringing my beans over here? So I figured a review would have to do way back. You guys asked the first
baseman to call in or leave a five-star review. So here I am. I played first. If third's the hot
corner, I guess I play the slow corner. I played first my whole life, but my high school journey
ended very poorly. No, no context after that. And Oh no, no, it is. I'm sorry. It's the first inning. The other team puts some green on it in right field.
The plays at home.
I'm just hanging back in my soft four hold shirt with not much to do,
but standing around wondering what's taking the outfielder so long.
So we turn around to check and the ball hits me directly in the face.
Needless to say, I looked like sloth from the Goonies for a week or two.
It was R U double F rough. This made me wonder what's the,
what's the worst you've ever been hurt while
playing a sport? And which hurt worse, your body
or your pride? Love you guys so much. Bye-bye.
Bree, like the cheese
from Villa Park, Illinois.
P.S. Serious poultry with Scott's
toilet paper. It's despicable.
It's right here. It's despicable.
Worst you've ever been hurt. We both
had like football injuries, right?
Your ankle, your foot? Yeah, I hurt my ankle like playing backyard football though.
Backyard.
It wasn't front yard.
I think I broke my toe playing football one time.
Maybe.
But.
Yeah, I tore my MCL senior year football.
That hurt my body more than my pride.
Yeah.
I tore my, I tore like everything in my knee, but that was my senior year of college.
And that would just depress me because I didn't, I couldn't do anything.
I guess I'll play
guitar a lot more seriously it was ACL MCL meniscus kept the LCL intact though yeah I guess so good
for you um any concussions I think no not like officially good I had one time where I didn't
really remember a whole lot in football practice but I never got it checked out well I'm sure that
wasn't a concussion I don't know no way i think i was just like uh whatever about two weeks it hurt to
look at the tv and when i stood up fast i got really dizzy but i'm sure i was just dehydrated
but i'm fine now you know um i can't think of anything really good as far as injuries go it
hurt my pride a lot though like getting hurt because i was like oh man it felt like it felt
like somebody pushed me from behind i don't know if that's how your knee injury was, but I literally didn't get
touched by anybody. I just, my knee buckled. Oh yeah. I got tackled. Yeah. So it felt like
someone tackled me in the mud and my right foot stuck in the mud. It was like one of those nasty
injuries on TV. Like, I don't want to look at this. Yeah. That's the worst. I got hit in the
cup one time hit by a pitch in the cup. By a pitch?
Yeah.
Were you squaring to bunt?
Or was it just like you got skimmed on the cup?
Skimmed on the cup.
Yeah, because unless you're Tony Bautista,
remember how he used to do his batting stance?
He was just straight up.
That's funny.
Ooh.
I feel like your dad had some good one-liners for that.
Probably.
I'm trying to think of any other baseball injuries.
I don't know.
I don't know.
I never got nailed to the forehead.
I'll tell you that.
Never looked like Sloth from the Goonies.
Gosh, that'd be terrible.
That would hurt.
Okay, well, thank you for...
Oh, wait.
No, my review of the week.
Best podcast ever from Macbook Pro 14.
Get on your feet for the best podcast ever.
I've been listening for a few months
and finally caught up to the current episode.
Now I'm sad that I have to wait till Monday
for the next episode to come out. You guys are not bad. You're funny and genuine. I've been listening for a few months and finally caught up to the current episode. Now I'm sad that I have to wait until Monday for the next episode to come out.
You guys are not bad.
You're funny and genuine.
I love to hear the interesting
life experiences you've had
and the day-to-day things
going on in your lives.
Please keep the episodes coming.
Okay.
That's a good tip.
Bring your best, Abby.
Thank you, Abby.
Could be Abby Kurtz.
Abby Kurtz.
She didn't bring up snow.
That's kind of Abby's thing.
I don't know.
Double feature.
Snow podcast like yours.
Whoa. Mike Trout. Brad, would you like to end this episode with a jingle yeah let's get maroon again and this one is by
heatherly again let's dance hey We're gonna bring the vibes up
Even though it's a little bit sad of a song
Get some vibes in here dude
We were so hyped
Never hypothesized
The tears rolling down from our eyes
The Tampa Bay would crush our vibes
Whisper goodbye To my home's parade
A loss on Super Bowl Sunday
An ache left in our hearts
The Chiefs are still number one for me
Let's get good vibes
I've been here like before
And a loss may be heartbreaking, you see But there's still a voice
Cause we won't keep bad vibes anymore
No, no, no
Bad vibes, bad
No, no, no
We tried our best to predict it right Bad. Hey.
Right?
Yes, Brad. But they're still our boys, cause we won't keep it vibes anymore
We'll fix this sad feeling, in time won't feel the sting The grand scheme is everything's alright
It's alright, that two-back vibes is gone
But Jake and I carry on with support from you
Cause we know that's what our fans always do
And the Chiefs are still number one for me
Let's give good vibes up in here like before
And the loss may be heartbreaking, we see
But there's still our voice
Cause we won't keep our vibes anymore
Bad vibes, hey
No bad vibes in here anymore.
The Chiefs are gonna go back to back to back to back to back to back to back to back to
back to back to back to back.
Yeah, Patrick Mose.
Hey.
I'm calling right now.
I'm calling my shot.
18.
18 in a row.
Oh.
Wow. Call my shop. 18. 18 in a row. Oh!
Wow.
Grace, you shouldn't put this in your bio.
Was that Heather Lee again?
Yeah, dude.
Yeah.
Crushing it.
Crushing it.
Crushing it. Crushing it.
Come on the road with us.
Maybe.
We don't go on the road yet, but it'd be cool to someday do that.
Heather Lee Anderson.
Oh, she's the Tim
Anderson's daughter, I
think.
Tim Henderson.
Tim Anderson?
Yeah.
You don't even
remember this famous
psychologist?
I said Anderson.
Okay.
This is Anderson.
I said it.
I said it.
I know it.
All started because
she tried to give me a
Panic at the Disco
song.
And now we're here.
And I kind of bashed
her for it, and now she's like, okay. And I kind of bashed her for it.
And now she's like, okay, watch this.
She's making up for it.
Yeah, absolutely.
We got plenty more.
Well, thank you guys for all the voice memos, all the great questions.
Listening to us, supporting us on Patreon.
I know we plugged it at the beginning, but there's bonus stuff there.
I guess Brad and I are going to start freestyle rapping there.
Yeah, okay.
For sure.
I don't know.
Oh, that'd be a fun way to like communicate with each other.
Kind of like back in the day we did Venmo conversations.
Yeah.
Like we like, hey, you want to go get, you know, McLean's Mondays, but I wrap it to you.
Yeah.
Okay.
Okay.
Okay.
Okay.
Yeah.
Okay.
It'd be better than that.
Just bag it for me.
Okay.
Okay.
Hey.
Hey.
Okay.
Seriously. Yes. Okay. Please. one day 10 o'clock hey okay
okay people would love it anything else any final thoughts encourage him brad encourage him
encourage him uh you guys are great and you're you're different and original and don't try to
be somebody that you're not i I think the best thing people can do
is just be themselves,
be interested in what you're interested in
and just live your life
and honor and serve other people.
So do it.
And if you ordered the large...
Don't try too hard.
Stop trying too hard.
Yeah.
And if you ordered the large,
make sure you get a large.
And don't say, I think.
Say, I ordered the large.
Can I please have it?
But I'm still a nice guy. Yeah, I'm a nice guy. I don't mean to bother you, maybe. I don't mean to bother you. I don't mean I think. Say, I ordered the large. Can I please have it? But I'm still a nice guy.
Yeah, I'm a nice guy.
I don't mean to bother you.
I don't mean to bother you.
I don't mean to bother you.
But I did order a large and I got a medium.
Oh, okay.
No problem.
Okay.
Okay.
Okay.
Okay.
Okay.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
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Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
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