Ghostrunners - 94 - Every Type of Prank
Episode Date: February 22, 2021This episode is full of helpful information. Settlers of Catan stereotypes, Canadien slang terms, and of course love compatibility based on Microsoft Office programs. Become a Patron and get exclusive... content from Jake & Brad: https://bit.ly/2XJ1h3y Watch this episode on YouTube: https://bit.ly/3cQSPnw Follow us on Instagram: http://bit.ly/33WAq4P Leave us a voice memo and ask a question: https://anchor.fm/jake-triplett/message Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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Discussion (0)
I made a breakthrough this week, Brad.
Yeah?
I have a new way to find love.
Not just for me.
Okay.
For everyone.
Like a new compatibility test.
Oh, okay.
I came up with it accidentally with our friend Luke.
Aaron Boleyn's sister's boyfriend.
Okay.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
That's him.
That's him.
We were talking and basically what I came up with is, you know, there's a lot of, oh,
I'm a ESTJ.
I'm an Enneagram 7, wing 6.
I'm a golden retriever.
I'm looking for an otter.
Yeah.
Not anymore.
It's going to all be solved through Microsoft Office.
I love it already.
You got three options.
Paint.
No.
Yeah, DOS prompt.
Yeah.
Bring down the toolbar.
No.
Are you a Word, powerpoint or excel guy and are you looking
for like a word powerpoint or excel girl okay i think each of them have like their own strengths
like excels like type a like very you know regimented analytical powerpoints kind of fun
kind of zany oh yeah you can do a transition yeah the whoosh yeah transition swipe that as far as
you want to go sure Sure. Whatever. Words.
It's like they're good with their words of affirmation.
Yes.
I think this is wonderful.
Oh, I like this.
However, you might be thinking, what if I, you know, Microsoft Office is a little old
school.
Yeah.
I want something cloud-based.
Maybe something like, you know, cloud-based PowerPoint.
Okay.
I'm looking for a freak in the sheets.
Oh, I see.
Okay.
Yeah.
That's the joke.
Throw them into this.
Uh-oh. Ooh, I think this tight beat means that it's going down
with some random thoughts and white meat too.
Midwest best friends eating fast food on repeat.
So come along, let's have some fun and go ahead, get on your feet
because this is the Ghost Rubs Podcast.
Ghost Rubs Podcast.
Every Monday morning we're taking ground.
Ghost Rubs Podcast. That actually happened accidentally in person.
We were like talking to people like at the block.
And I was like, everyone gather around.
I didn't say that. In fact, I don't know if I've ever said the word.
Hey, hey, hey.
Listen to your ears.
There's a new decree just posted.
Yeah.
I didn't say gather around,
but I was just talking to people around me
and I was like, hey, what do you think of this?
Luke and I just came up with this this morning.
What are you?
Found out me and Bree, oh, hot and have Bree.
Perfectly compatible.
Okay, what does perfectly compatible mean?
I was looking for a PowerPoint girl.
She's looking for an Excel guy.
Oh, okay. Let's do it.
You're an Excel guy.
I think so. I'm a core. I'm a core.
Okay.
Touch my core.
Okay.
Feel it.
Maybe you're like an Excel wing word. So like you, sometimes you implement like
your V lookups into a word document.
When I'm at my best, I'm winging word. When I'm at my worst, I'm winging PowerPoint.
Yeah. Right. and everyone saw microsoft
access remember that like no one used microsoft what was that even about it's like this weird
magenta color you had to cover it and like your microsoft office it was like scatter plots and
stuff like that i feel like had i don't think it was scatter plot i think it was like maybe
not scatter plots but like uh no that's not what it is like the word bubbles and stuff like that
that's not scatter plots i remember just being like boring, like data entry.
Oh, I remember.
Yeah, maybe.
It was like way more boring than Excel for some reason.
What am I thinking of then?
I'm thinking of like.
You're thinking of a graphing calculator.
No.
Yeah.
Turn it upside down.
It says boobies.
That's not a graphing calculator.
That's just any calculator.
You're right.
No, I don't know.
It really set it on fire.
If you've got a good imagination,
it'll graph it for you.
Oh, you're right.
No, there was something where it was like, you know, it was like circle, like the thought bubbles. Oh, you're right. Um, no, there was something where
it was like, you know, there's like circle, like the thought bubbles, basically you could make
like a whole, like, does this, is this true? Then you go to this. If this is true, then you go to
that. And like, you can make a whole sheet with them. I thought that was access. Maybe not,
but we had, we had a class back in the day called computer apps. Yes. Yeah. Yeah. Computer apps in
seventh grade. Everyone had to take it. It was like a quarter long class. And it was like a couple of weeks of word, a couple of weeks of PowerPoint, Excel, whatever. in seventh grade everyone had to take it It was like a quarter long class and it was like a couple weeks of word a couple weeks of PowerPoint Excel
Whatever dude, I took a class like that in college. I took it. I had to take another thing to computing
Yeah, I'm sorry you're short of business or something like I got this I got this down my the guy that sat next to me
Rodney Magruder. Yes. Oh, you know
He's in the NBA now, he's a professional basketball player. No way.
Yeah.
Still?
Yeah.
Cool.
He actually kind of got called out like two weeks ago by Klay Thompson.
Oh, it was that guy?
Yeah.
Did you hear about that?
He's not going to be in the league much longer.
Yeah, he's not going to be in the league.
I don't know what he's talking about.
And you had intro to computing with him.
Yeah.
So if he doesn't get kicked out, I think he'll be good.
You know, he's proficient in Microsoft Access.
Yeah, yeah.
He knows attachments.
He's fine.
Microsoft Outlook. He'll be good. So anyway, I'm like friends with Rodney Magruder, Access. Yeah, yeah, he knows attachments. He's fine. Microsoft Outlook.
So anyway, I'm like friends with Rodney McGreeter basically.
Oh, you guys are tight.
Yeah, way closer than him and Clay.
Yeah, tight, tight, tight.
He and Clay.
Yeah, tight, tight, tight.
But yeah, anyway, Bree and I were talking about it.
She's like, what about like for my classroom, we use like a lot of like Google Slides, like
Google Sheets.
And I was like, oh, you're looking for a Freak in the Sheets.
Freak in the Sheets, yeah.
And it didn't land great in the church setting we were in.
Yeah.
But I was like, I'm going to write this down, though.
Honestly, it took me a second.
Like, I didn't calculate the joke.
I just calculated the phrase when I first heard it.
Graphic calculated, probably.
That's right.
Yes.
And so I was like, okay, I don't get it.
Gross.
And then I got back to the sheets.
So maybe next time, freaking the spreadsheets.
Is that too obvious?
It doesn't roll off the tongue
as good, but I like spread.
Oh, okay.
Like peanut butter and jelly is what you mean.
I love spreads. Yeah. Or a good table
spread. Oh, sure.
Charcuterie board. Charcuterie board.
Did you see that Viber video? Viber video?
Uh-uh. This old man just couldn't say charcuterie.
He's like, coochie-coo.cuterie he's like like no grandpa stop saying that good good or cutery he was like geez dude i uh i obviously
don't i i'm made out to say obviously but i don't have tiktok anymore but you know reels is like the
same thing it's like people repost their tiktok oh yeah tiktok posted on rails and i did the other
night like spend like 30 minutes i i kept being like okay this is my last one i'm gonna 30 30 dude
are you making fun of me because it's not that much or is that that's too much it's an enormous
amount of time oh compared to a lot of i bet people spend hours on there but not us brad not
we're too good for that we're different yeah it was like 11 30 and i was like all right i'm going
to bed 11 40 11 45 all right you know whatever midnight, it was like 1130 and I was like, all right, I'm going to bed 1140, 1145. All right. You know, whatever. Midnight hits. I was like, I got to go. Okay.
Seriously. So anyway, how's your day? Good stuff. Slash week. I've been so busy, which is a good
thing. Day's been good. Aunt Cindy, shout out Aunt Cindy. She watched Hattie all day long.
All the day long. So Catherine got a lot of stuff done at the house.
The week's been good.
I wrote some stuff down.
Was Aunt Cindy the same one who was talking to you today?
About?
BCD.
You got this.
You got this.
Aunt Cindy, BCD.
Blank.
Oh, yes, yes, yes, yes.
Yeah, my Aunt Cindy, as we were leaving.
Well, first, I didn't even tell you this part of the story. Um, so aunt Cindy just has lots of random stuff at her house.
She's an aunt, so she's got a random stuff. You have to, and she's old, you know, old people just have stuff. You have stuff. And so Catherine's like, Oh, scoliosis, uh, eczema. Yeah. Crippling
fear of COVID. Um, and stuff. And so, uh, like Catherine, as we were going over there was like hey will you see if she
has an extra cd case katherine has a cd don't have a cd case i need a cd katherine lives in
2002 like she's like yeah is nsync still popular or what and so i was like okay i'm sure she did
and she was like i actually do have a lot of those she got me like four cd cases she's like
and i have a ton of blank cds do you need them i
was like i don't think i can use them even if i wanted to like i don't have anything that could
even plug like you know read a blank blank cd right now that would be worthwhile so but then
i told it to katherine she's like oh that would be amazing to have some blank cds i could copy
some cds that we play in the car for hattie to have in her room. Cause Hattie has a CD player. Of course, Catherine lives. Catherine's old dude. She's old and
she's, she, she acts older. She's in her thirties. Like she gets really frustrated really quickly
at phone stuff. Like, like she'll like be looking at something and she's like, how do
I do this? Like we have a wireless printer and she gets so frustrated with it sometimes.
It's like, Oh, like she'll give up so quickly. And I'm like, you're 30 years old.
You got this.
Yes, we're good.
We're at that perfect millennial stage
where we're good with technology,
but we still respect the old school.
She's more on the old school side.
So you think it's any has any Pokemon cards?
No, I don't think so.
She has a Digimon.
I was gonna say GameCube.
She has Nintendo Wii still.
Wii?
Not interested.
You like those videos, dude?
No.
Speaking of TikTok.
Any viral TikTok sound, I'm out on.
No, that one made me laugh a few times.
I saw a few.
Wii?
Nah.
I'm out.
I'm out.
I don't buy it.
I don't buy TikTok sounds.
You don't buy any of them?
No, I don't buy viral TikTok sounds.
I do get kind of frustrated when it's like, that's not even your original audio here.
Oh my gosh.
That's so much of TikTok.
It's just like people redoing the same audio oh yeah there's one comedian dustin nickerson
he used to open for john he like had all these tiktoks going viral of his sound but not him
people are just lip-syncing his stand-up comedy and it's like blowing up and no one even it's
like i can't figure out how to even get back to him they do a terrible job yeah tiktok does they
do a lot of stuff right but they do not do a good job of like showing off like,
hey, this is not really theirs.
This is fake.
Right.
Right.
Yeah.
So yeah, like all these videos are going viral.
Lip syncing his standup comedy.
I would be infuriated.
That's like, that's really not cool.
It's not on the same level, but woodworking accounts.
Oh no.
Hey, I guarantee you people out there are like, oh, have you seen those woodworking
videos?
Those cool epoxy table or something?
Yeah.
People complain about those all the time.
Like I didn't get credit for this.
What do you mean?
There's like a, there's like the big, like at woodworking underscore memes, you know,
and they post like to 300,000 people, this video, but they don't give credit to the people
who like, they're like, no, we curate content.
Like we know what's good and what's funny.
We curate it.
It's like, that's not a talent.
You shouldn't get paid for that. No, you absolutely should not. Oh, it's so frustrating. Like we know what's good and what's funny. We curate it. It's like, that's not a talent. You shouldn't get paid for that.
No, you absolutely should not.
Oh, it's so frustrating.
That's what meme accounts are on Instagram.
Yeah.
Just repost other people's jokes.
Right.
And then occasionally they'll do a brand deal.
Like they make money off other people's jokes.
Yeah.
It's crazy.
It is.
Yeah.
Not us.
Not us.
Not us.
Freaking the sheets.
That's all me, baby.
So anyway, yeah.
Brie, you're awesome, my baby.
Oh, really?
Come back, Brie.
Sorry I texted you that.
I don't have anything too crazy we we
installed crown molding the other day you're kidding no no but like listen to me real quick
like it's hard it's hard like don't joke about this dude it's actually pretty difficult i believe
you isaac and i did it and we did it really really well like nice like like as we were doing it we
were like dude we should do this like for real. Like you're like, hey, lift your head up, King. Your crown is falling. Oh,
he's like, oh, come on.
Yes.
Yes, King. And
anyway, we so I felt like really accomplished from that.
So that was that was a big thing.
Valentine's Day. We celebrate Valentine's
Day. You did with Minsky's pizza.
So zany.
Rectangle circle.
Would you go? I actually went circle because i was like
i think they rip you off a little bit with the surface area of the heart shape what do you think
oh i've never uh i kind of analyzed it i never had a heart shaped pizza i was like surely it's
the same box and so how could it be as big of a you know surface area so i was like i'm not i'm
not falling for this minsky's big daddy ain't skipping off service area pizza.
No way.
No way, baby.
And then we watched Big Short, which I know you're a big fan of.
I watched it two weeks ago.
Catherine had never seen it.
And I, this was my third time seeing it, I think.
And so I was like, I'm going to be able to answer all the questions for her.
And she paused it so many times and would ask me questions and I would try to answer
it.
And then eventually she's like, why don't you just say, I don't know.
Okay.
So a CDA, that's basically, why don't we just wait for the Jenga scene?
She's like, no, you know, she would ask these questions and we kind of got an argument eventually
because she's, because I feel like I was trying to be nice and like kind and explain it to
her very elementarily.
Oh yeah.
But she was like, okay, let's see.
You have a lemonade stand.
She's like, stop with the lemonade stand.
No, she literally was like,
I've been watching the movie the whole time.
Of course I know this part of it.
She's like, why is he making all this money?
I was like, well, he's betting against the real estate.
She's like, I know that.
That's the whole point of the movie.
You're like, all right,
this is the building blocks of my sentence.
Hold on, let me finish.
And eventually she just goes,
why don't you just say you don't know?
That's awesome.
I can't wait for marriage. Valentine's Day was so romantic, why don't you just say you don't know? That's awesome.
I can't wait for marriage.
Valentine's day was so romantic.
Let me tell you.
Um, no, it was good.
So we watched a movie recently that was from the same guy who did the big short.
Oh, what was it? And it was good.
It had like, uh, it was like pause and like, they would like narrate it for you.
Okay, man.
I wonder what it was.
I think I watched it two nights ago.
The fourth wall or whatever you want to call it. Um, it wasn the selena gomez at a blackjack table talking to you but it
was just like oh okay um oh it's just like a narration you're probably wondering why i'm here
yeah yeah i like those those are always kind of a you can't really google the movie i just watched
you could if you just watched it how'd you watch it uh tv oh god like on cable
no just like on our tv on a screen uh flat screen i'm texting isaac and harrison and just saying
what was that movie we watched okay movie we watched a couple nights ago it's crazy how little
i remember about this movie oh Oh, this is sad.
You don't remember any of the details?
No.
Any of the actors?
Something's wrong with me.
Can you even picture a scene?
Like, oh, it was outside when this happened.
Or like, they're on a racetrack.
Here's what I remember.
I remember we watched Whiplash earlier this week.
I have that pretty well in my head.
I know last night I watched half of a movie
called like a...
Under the Tuscan sun no a movie
of mark wahlberg oh okay date night uh and then pain and gain i don't know geez this is embarrassing
i have no clue anything that like happens to me in real life that's wild how do i not know anything
about this movie other than like it reminded me of the big short. Did you like it?
I think so.
Yeah, I think I did.
It was like, that was a pretty good movie.
So like what, what affected you?
I don't know.
Like nothing, nothing affected you from this movie.
Like you liked it, but it did not sink in at all.
I know.
How am I ever supposed to go to church and listen to a pastor?
I watched a very visually engaging two hour long movie and I don't know.
Oh, got it. I'm going to text him. Nevermind boys. Nevermind. Never I don't know. Oh! Got it.
I'm going to text him.
Never mind, boys.
Never mind.
Never mind, boys.
It was Forrest Gump.
It was Vice.
Oh, okay.
I've all seen it for the last 20 minutes.
Not really.
Brad Pitt?
No.
Christian Bale.
Okay.
Is Dick Cheney.
Oh, wow.
Okay.
I was thinking of something completely different.
That's okay.
Okay.
Gosh, all that just for this average movie.
It was vice.
Hey, Peter, it was vice.
I liked it.
And I don't think Isaac and Harrison really liked it, but I did.
That was interesting.
We did watch Whiplash together and I feel like you didn't have the same strong emotions
towards it as I did.
Correct.
Yeah.
Which is just bonkers to me.
I'm sorry.
It was so good. I was, I was thinking about it again. I. Yeah. Which is just bonkers to me. I'm sorry. It was so good.
I was,
I was thinking about it again and I was like,
this is the best movie,
but my mom said the same thing.
She's like,
why do you like that movie so much?
So maybe it's me,
but it's not,
it's so good.
Um,
but one of the highlights of my week,
one of the highlights of our weeks,
I think maybe,
maybe you do enough fun things.
Uh,
but Saturday night we had the K-Life Oscars event.
It was a time.
Um, and it was the high school, high school K-Life ministry that Jake used to work for.
Catherine used to work for.
And yeah, they had like this award show kind of thing and they asked us to host it.
And we had no, like seriously, no context except for like, we knew that there was certain
categories.
They were like giving awards to kids for stuff.
We didn't know what to wear.
We didn't know like what time to show up really
until like pretty much right beforehand.
Like are we going to get prepped before?
Or is that when do people show up?
Brad texted 30 minutes.
Like we were actually on our way.
Yeah.
And Brad said, hey, anything you could share with me now would be great.
We have little to no idea what's happening.
Because I know what it's like on their end. they're probably rushing around yeah you're going to be doing
all this stuff and so we're like let's not stress them out more let's if they can give us stuff now
you were like send me a quick voice memo yeah and she's like uh i'll just explain it when you get
there like okay and this is the part we're having a podcast where you sing quite a bit comes in handy
because claire goes all right now i have this. You don't have to say yes to it, but it kind of didn't make sense.
She's like, yeah, she was so vague about it.
She was so vague about it.
One of the awards signed his best rap song and which has nothing to do with the kids.
It's just like, no, what's the best rap song.
And it's going to go to a pop star by Drake featuring DJ Khaled, which I don't know if
that was even that popular song.
I guess I'd never heard of it. You didn't even know it. Well, whenever they said it, I was like,
okay, I know that song. I was like, yeah, yeah, yeah.
And then I realized I was thinking of Rockstar. Oh, you mean Popstar,
the song. I saw the Andy Samberg movie.
That's who you're talking about.
And so she's like, so Brad, I wrote a
Kidz Bop version of it. That's gonna be part of the show.
We're like, you, we're like, but we have the Kidz Bop
version, and you sing
a cover of that. And I just like this is how so many of the jingles go where it's right
before it's time and brad's got new lyrics to a song he doesn't really know he's like let me just
see if i can pull this off yeah but but at least usually i've at least like listened to the song
and so and i like was like maybe i've heard it and so listened to it a few times had not once heard it. It's not sound familiar.
And it's like it's not like
a very distinct sounding song
either. It's like kind of mumbling.
Like it's like
that. How am I supposed to learn this?
People will recognize a cover of this instantly.
She's like no people know it for sure. People
know it. I was like okay. And so went for it and it went pretty well it was amazing because of how bad
it was like no it was awesome so claire uh our friend she's phenomenal on the piano so she like
has these like chords that she's playing on the piano brad is strumming along his guitar i'm
holding two microphones to brad's face, and it's going pretty great.
The kids are into it. Um, and before, yeah, sorry. Like, like beforehand, I was like,
do you mind? Cause she kind of played the chords once when she was explaining this to us and told
me what they were. And then she's like, and she kind of sang it a little bit. I was like, do you
mind just like kind of opening it and starting it? And then I can kind of add on. And that was pretty vague.
I should have been more specific about this because I meant for her to like start the
piano and get the tempo going and start singing the first.
So that you can kind of know what's happening.
Exactly.
And she did the piano.
Great.
Great.
But just kind of kept looking at me.
Anytime now.
And so, and so I just kind of impressed.
I was like another one to this, like very somber, like acoustic, another one.
We the best music and start singing.
And I don't really, do you think they recognize the song?
I mean, thankfully we said this is going to be pop star.
Oh, we did.
Yeah.
So hopefully that helps.
But, you know, Brad's got this music stand quite a ways away from him.
So he can't really see the lyrics that well.
It's not his guitar. Very tiny guitar strap yeah i looked like freaking johnny cash
up there like it was like way up here we forgot to grab a mic stand so i'm holding mics for brad
so it's not an ideal setup yeah and yeah brad's kind of going on mumbling a bit and then you
decide to kind of raise it a couple octaves, start screaming a little bit. Yeah. My, my thought process was like, I can either do pretty poorly at this and like not give
it my all, or I could do poorly at it and give it my all.
And it would actually be funny.
Like, like there's that, which is also very similar to the jingles.
You know what I mean?
So imagine a guy hitting about one in every four words correctly, who then starts singing
louder and higher pitch, hitting the exact same ratio of words.
Give a little sample of what it sounded like.
Yeah.
So the first time it was like, I don't remember any of the words now, but it's like, I'll
look them up real quick.
Or it's like, I just remember caught up.
And not a doctor.
Yeah.
Helicopter.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
You hit those words great. I'm a doctor. I'm a pop star.
And then I would
kind of like do a little instrumental.
They're kind of into it. They're still sitting down at this point.
And then I did what I called the Janis Joplin.
So the raspy kind of...
And I was just rocking it out, baby.
And I looked ridiculous,
by the way. We'll get into that later.
We'll get into that later. There's a lot of aspects to this.
So yeah, Brad started to really get into it,
like singing even higher, even louder.
They were getting into it a little bit.
And then out of nowhere, this was like truly amazing to see. It wasn't even that funny.
It was just more just like impressive, at least to me. I guess it was actually pretty
funny. Brad just starts singing, Let It Be. And Claire's just like going right along with
him. And then the crowd's just like loving it. Next thing you know, like all their flashlights
are up and just like waving it. And now Brad dressed ridiculous is singing.
Let it be at this K-Live Oscars event.
Yeah.
It was just like this amazing transition that wasn't planned at all.
And then you're okay.
Yeah.
Maybe we should have gone into it.
We need to.
Okay.
Now describe your skit character.
And then the words that you started saying, let it be.
So like, we didn't know what to dress up like.
And I was like, I'm just going just gonna look like like kind of unintentionally
i tried to look like jonah hill's character from war dogs if you've ever seen look up hey uh what's
our guys justin sorry justin justin put it in right now a picture of war dogs actually put in
picture of war dogs picture me war dogs me war dogs me war dogs me together um so i basically kind of just look like joe de hill like these like
ridiculously huge like uh woodworking glasses like old school and i just slicked back my hair
and i had like this maroon uh blazer on and when i got there i hadn't even looked in the mirror yet
like i was i was in such a hurry because that was right after the crown molding we were i was on high
in life but like didn't have any time.
And so when we first got there, I was just talking to Claire and Matt and you just normally.
And I looked in the mirror.
I was like, because we were trying to figure out what we were going to do.
Like, what's our shtick?
What are we going to do tonight?
I was like, we'll just figure out.
We can do different characters every time we come out or something.
And I looked at myself.
I was like, dude, I cannot be a normal person at all.
I look ridiculous.
And so long story short, we figured out that I was going to be like this kind of New York
guy.
And we're like Santo, Santo Mac from episode 24.
The patrons know the patrons got to see you.
Yeah.
And so Santorini McCluskey from way back in the day on the podcast.
And so I was just like this New York guy, a Santo Mac.
And we didn't even explain the backstory, but the backstory was that I was there because I had to settle some gambling debt.
So I was doing anything I could to get hired on.
And so I was a I think we said I was going to be a lawyer.
That was also a used car salesman.
Yeah, we really we really emphasize used car salesman throughout it.
So I was I was working for Sal Palantonio's Jeep Buick. And Mazda.
And Mazda.
Yeah.
Which don't go together at all.
And yeah, just, and so while we were singing Let It Be, I changed it to Buy a Jeep.
That was pretty funny.
Buy a Jeep.
Buy a Jeep.
Yeah.
It was just amazing.
I was like, this is crazy.
Yeah. And Isaac told us afterwards, he's like, the people I was sitting next to, they were like, I can't believe I'm not paying money for this. Like during that part, they was like, this is crazy. Yeah. And Isaac told us afterwards, he's like the people I was sitting next to,
they were like,
I can't believe I'm not paying money for this.
Like during that part,
they're like,
this is incredible.
I can't believe this was free.
It was really fun.
Whenever the ghost hunters come on tour,
Santo Max coming out and he's going to look you in the eyes.
He just,
he's going to ask you how your mom's doing.
Yeah,
that was,
yeah,
I had a few different taglines.
That was,
and I kept asking Jake beforehand,
like as we were kind of brainstorming,
I was like,
is that too, is that too much? You know, know because i kind of forget like like not that we're
inappropriate on the podcast but like this is for high schoolers specifically like is it is it wrong
to ask how your mom's doing like because that's what i kept asking i was like hey how's your mom
how's your mom huh she's still doing pilates 4 4 p.m mrs sadististans. Oh yeah. How's your grandma?
And then I would like point to like some,
like there was one boy like sitting with all these girls.
Like,
why are you over there?
Did you fight?
Did you fight?
Did he fight?
He fought it.
Didn't he?
You know,
like,
I don't even know what my accent was,
but anyway,
it was,
it was so fun.
What kind of car she drive?
What kind of car she drive now?
She needs,
she need a new Mazda.
She drive a Mazda?
I'll go up with an RX8.
Miata?
Why? Uh, yeah, yeah. I kept, it's Miata, but I kept calling him Miata. Yeah. Yeah. I'll get her a nice Mazda Miata. It was, it was so fun, man. And I was not, honestly, I wasn't looking
forward to that very much at all. Like it was kind of like a, I'm looking forward to Sunday
when I'm done with all this other stuff. Yeah. And that's what volunteering your time is about.
That's why you do it. So you have something to not look forward to. It's like, man, I'm going to do all
this and not get paid. Yeah. I was like, gosh. And then you're happy you did it afterwards.
Yeah. That's why you volunteer. You're thankful for all the people that you,
all the high school kids you harassed that night. I've only cried laughing at Brad a few times on
this podcast, but he got me Saturday night because you know, one, obviously this has got
not going to be new to you guys, but new to high schoolers like we have uh oh because the time before you're like hey I'm uh thinking about
becoming a comedian huh you think I could do it yeah yeah so I gave him some five dollar jokes
five dollar jokes which were good and then the next time it came out you know I'm like you guys
Santo Mac has kind of announced me he's not just a comedian who just tells jokes he also does
impersonations but you guys like to hear some so he starts in the patch from my homes, which is great.
The kids are loving it.
I think they're kind of like taking about like, whoa, this like sounds a lot like I
heard one guy go.
This is actually good.
Yeah.
I was like, thanks, man.
Thanks, dude.
And this is a cool throwback on the podcast.
Like, who knows?
50 episodes ago, I talked about like this good memory.
Our friend Matt Ford, when he used to work at Canacook with me, he would mess with me
when I was on the stage and he would play this very cinematic very emotional
song from the movie Front Night Lights
and then it would make my announcement and we did
it on the pod we did it you know we gave an example
yeah it was like it
turns any announcement into like a
very dramatic one and so Matt
works for K-Life and is a
total throwback he puts that song on while Brad
is talking about you know
with cows. Yeah.
So then Brad just gets into this like halftime speech,
gets like all these boys on their feet.
They're having like this mosh pit.
Yeah.
Those guys, those guys played it up so well.
Yeah. They did great.
Yeah.
Cause also like the end of your speech hit right when like the,
the drums hit, it was beautiful.
So it's already like, this is amazing.
Like how perfect is all this?
This is awesome.
And then they like jumped up.
Yeah.
And I'm like, Whoa, Santorino. That was,no that was uh you know that was amazing how'd you do that i'm a little
out of breath you know from jumping with the boys you got so excited i'll talk about jumping with
the boys and then i start laughing and then you did the jonah hill laugh yeah for more
justin put it in. Jonah Hill laughed.
And I'll do it.
I'll do it too.
It's just like the... And I did that probably 30 times.
Not 30 times.
You just kept doing it.
But 10 times.
Sorry, I'm a little out of breath from partying with my boys.
My boys.
That's what it's all about, is doing it with the boys.
And we had talked about like multiple times, like you should do the Jonah Hill laugh.
And I kept forgetting.
And then finally I remembered like near the end of the night.
And I couldn't like, Jake literally couldn't do it.
You were just like.
I was paralyzed.
Oh man.
It was so funny. That's a great movie if you haven't seen it. You were just like... I was paralyzed. Oh, man. It was so funny.
That's a great movie if you haven't seen it.
War Dogs is so underrated.
It's rated R.
So if you're a high school kid out there, don't watch it.
You're crying a little bit right now.
Yeah.
With the boys.
The boys.
There's nothing like the boys.
Oh, gosh.
It was a good time.
It was fun.
We got to get more people listening to the podcast.
We can go on tour.
That was so fun.
Yeah, dude.
Let's do it.
That was really fun. Everyone tell 10 friends.
And it's just like one of those things where we had no, none of it planned. No, like a little bit,
I guess, right beforehand. You were like, okay, this time, I guess let's do impressions.
Yeah. Or this time let's do this, you know, but it was, it was just like, yeah, you killed it.
It was fun. How's your mom? How's your mom? she still baked those cookies on on thursdays uh she still whatever he still she still put the uh slice in the sandwich uh diagonal styles or what uh
cold hoagies huh it was just fun to to mess around so be some oh can we also is it is it
too inappropriate to tell the,
the,
uh,
audience impersonation suggestion and what I actually did.
No,
I meant to bring this up.
Talk about a gaffe.
Oh man.
So the plan was going to do Patrick Holmes,
Donald Trump,
and then like an audience given impersonation.
Don't do a Donald Trump impression with a high school kids.
That was a bad idea.
Now we know.
I think they were like,
they were like,
this is uncomfortable.
This is not funny.
So don't do that. Um, they thought it was fine, but, uh, and think they were like they're like this is uncomfortable this is not funny so don't do that um they thought it was fine but uh and then you were like like no way this is
gonna go bad uh we need a suggestion for an impersonation for for santorino to do yeah so
somebody goes jared from subway i was like oh and then somebody else and somebody else yells the
baby was a rapper if you didn't know and i well not even dramatic irony just just
didn't know ignorance yeah i i said okay this is okay first of all so so the the verbiage i'm going
to use i'll give an example of it is like like imagine if uh patrick mahomes was trying to
impersonate Donald Trump.
I would say this is Patrick Mahomes doing Donald Trump.
That makes sense.
And so I'd be like, how would I do that?
It is incredible.
China.
So anyway, and so anyway, I go, I go, okay.
In my, in my like New Yorker voice, I was like, okay, this is, this is Jared from subway doing the baby.
And all the kids just go, Oh, all these boys. Unbeknownst to me, I had heard that Jared from
subway gotten a little bit of trouble at one point. The reason he was in trouble is because
he was a little too fascinated with little kids with yes, with the children. And so when I said
Jared from subway doing the baby, probably one of the worst sentences you could have said at that time.
And it was a ministry, a high school ministry.
So fire me from my volunteer job if you want to.
But man, that was a bad, that was a bad.
And I didn't realize it until like after the show, like you and I went to Chick-fil-A and
you were like, oh yeah, that was pretty funny because of Jared from Subway's, yeah, all
this stuff.
I was like, oh, I had no idea.
Also, we probably can't even
repeat this on the, on the podcast, but probably your fifth sentence out of the gate was also
a little interesting. That one, whatever, man, maybe we shouldn't do live shows. I would just
say things I didn't mean. I meant to say yank in my chain or, Oh, you jerk i don't know what is like that there is like a phrase that's
similar uh like jerking me around jerking me around yeah yeah be careful though make sure
you say around that's all i'll say so anyway that was Yeah, I forgot about that one.
All those things to say it was a fun time.
Fun time.
Good times.
So.
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talk about what's going on with you man uh had a good day brad long day like very full day sure um
those are always good started by me waking up on the couch at 8 a.m kind of a what am i where am i
what happened last night okay just i guess i fell asleep during the movie i just never woke up
what movie oh it's the mark wahlberg one woke up. What movie? It's the Mark Wahlberg one.
No, I don't know what it's called.
It was on Prime.
Okay.
What is it called?
All the time in the world.
Does that sound like a movie?
That sounds like a movie.
Okay.
It sounds like I've never heard of it, but it sounds like one.
That's definitely what it's called.
I don't know.
Okay.
So fell asleep watching that, woke up, and I believe I wrote down in my notes this morning,
goose head, like podcast notes. Really? Does that mean anything to you? Oh yes. I think it was one of the challenges of like things we need to say randomly. Oh dang it. I am not even kidding. I
was like, okay, I know I wrote this down for a reason, but it was like when I first woke up,
like I do not know. Dang. I need to speak in full sentences in my notes.
I'm surprised you don't.
That's an Excel person would.
I'm going to be honest.
Really?
I think so.
You get, you're more thorough.
So that's pretty PowerPoint of you, dude.
That's your bullet point kind of guy.
Sorry, Brie.
Yeah.
Sorry, Brie.
Dang.
Yeah.
For life of me, I was like, what is goose head?
Goose head.
So I did that first thing this morning.
Went over to Trey's house.
We shot a little behind the scenes video, which was really fun.
And then I got to be in a video today, which was a good time.
Got to be a 17.
Does he film?
What's his name?
Derek was filming behind the scenes, so he filmed Trey filming me.
I got to be a 1776 bartender.
So I just said a lot of like, you know, misogynistic things towards women.
But like the 17,
like that video,
Derek filmed or Trey filmed.
I mean,
I filmed most of it in a Trey film to me at the end.
Thank you.
Derek is always filming the behind the scenes.
Okay.
Okay.
Okay.
Okay.
Okay.
Gotcha.
So it was fun.
17.
What was the other,
what is that?
The whole theme of the,
uh,
it's like if 2020 and 2021,
like met at a bar,
like the two years. Oh, okay. You know, it was like, Hey, how are you doing? What do you do in 2020? He's like if 2020 and 2021 met at a bar, like the two years.
Oh, okay.
It's like, hey, how are you doing?
What do you do?
And 2020 is like, I'm actually retired.
I had a heck of a career.
Okay, nice.
So it's clever.
It's pretty fun.
And then, yeah, I come in.
We needed the video to be a little longer.
It's like, who are you?
And it's like, oh, I'm 1776.
Oh, sure.
Yeah.
Nice.
So it was good.
We have some big plans coming up soon.
And then, yeah, straight went home, edited, went straight to pickleball with Scott because
Isaac's back hurts.
Tonight's the tournament.
Actually, like the end of the tournament.
Well, we lost to the people who are better than us.
So, you know, it happens.
It does.
That is always okay.
To lose to somebody that's better than you.
Who's been playing longer.
Yeah.
I feel like Joel Embiid in high school.
Or college even. I just started this. Yeah. But I feel like, hey, you give me a few more years. longer. Yeah. I feel like Joel Embiid in high school. Or college even.
I just started this.
Yeah.
But I feel like, hey, you give me a few more years.
Right, right.
Then I'll be fine.
I'm gifted.
I just have not done this as long as you have.
Yeah.
I just touched a basketball last year for the first time.
Right.
Literally, that's a great parallel because Joel Embiid was a soccer guy growing up.
And then he's like, basketball?
Basketball.
You were a basketball, football, baseball guy.
And all of a sudden, you're like, pickleball yeah so okay so yeah that's that's how i felt
about the chiefs but in reverse like the reason like that we lost the super bowl was so frustrating
to me because it was like if we lose and we play a good game it's one thing but we did not play
anywhere near what we're supposed to in the super bowl. So I'm glad that you didn't feel like the Chiefs.
No, I didn't feel like the Chiefs.
Yeah.
Afterwards, I get talking to this guy who I barely know.
Like I know his first name.
Still don't even know his last name.
But just like we were sitting next to each other.
So I struck up a conversation.
Hey, haven't seen you around in a while.
Like what have you been up to?
He's like, well, I had to go to Europe for the past six months. six months. I was like, Oh wow. Six months. I was like six months ago.
I was like that. I mean, that had to be pretty tough to get to Europe at that point in time.
Right. And he's like, well, uh, it was with the military. I was like, Oh, well I guess that makes
it easier. I was like, what, like, what's your involvement with the military? And, uh, he goes
air force. I was like, Oh wow. Like, that's awesome. Like I had no idea. And I was like,
what country were you in? He goes Afghanistan. I'm like whoa oh cool yeah um this is amazing and then at this point i start
to almost feel bad like i don't even know what's really going on but i'm curious but like so i'm
like i'm sorry i don't know enough about foreign affairs to know like what's going on with us in
afghanistan right now like what are you doing and he goes technically I'm there to shoot bad guys I was like no way he's like but we are very like we want to get our guys and get out of
there we don't want to cause anything we don't want to even like respond anything so it's like
even when they shoot at us we just kind of look the other way well it's like shoot at us what do
you mean yeah expand on that he was like the Taliban you know they just hate anyone being
there like Americans Brits anyone like anyone who's there the Taliban you know they just hate anyone being there like americans brits anyone like anyone who's there
the taliban you know they they consider us all infidels and they will shoot at us i was like so
it's like still dangerous he's like oh yeah anytime you leave the base it's dangerous like
now you're playing pickleball like shoot at us shoot at us if somebody's shooting at me i don't
care what my orders are i'll shoot back he looks the other way that is not very american of us well he is german oh perfect
yeah his name is finn really yeah he said he's from he's from germany but now he
interesting he plays for us okay he got traded yeah i guess yeah kind of like dirk novitski
yeah he's a dirk of he's a maverick Pawn. Nice. So yeah, it was a fun conversation
and they did that right before this.
Interesting.
I'm fresh off the Sphin talk.
Wow.
Yeah.
That's crazy about all that.
I know, I was like, I just watched War Dogs,
so like I know about the Triangle of Death.
Oh.
I didn't say that.
Oh, those are bad.
Oh, what a great movie.
Yeah, we won't give anything away.
That's crazy.
One of my friends is, yeah, in Afghanistan, but he can't tell me like anything else. Ooh. And it's just like anything away. That's crazy. One of my friends is in Afghanistan, but he can't tell me anything else.
It's just like, dude, that's crazy.
He can't tell me exactly where he is or anything like that.
Jeez.
Anyway, I played Catan last night for the first time since 2018.
Did you see your box?
Yes.
I need to talk about this.
Okay.
Yeah, so I don't know anybody that plays settlers 15 or any
board game every time on my box that i have my board anytime anybody wins we sign the box i don't
know if that's a normal thing or not do you think it's normal i don't know if it's a normal thing
or not i think it's fun my sister did it always growing up and so kind of carried on the tradition
um but there was a name on there that was signed without me playing and
i don't know how i feel about it oh i i don't really care but then i said something and gunner
affirmed it he's like yeah i wouldn't really like that either i was like okay okay then i do have a
little bit of feelings about this because it's like i lost because it was harrison not harrison
pollard but harrison petrick i never know is. Is it Petrick Petrick? No one knows.
Okay.
Harrison Patrick.
He's born in Germany.
It's Finn Petrick.
Yeah, he signed it and I was like, okay, I guess, whatever.
It was fine.
I'm currently playing Harrison at chess.
We were going back and forth playing chess.
Oh, really?
Haven't lost yet, but I really don't want him to sign my board.
Right.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Imagine if I were playing Harrison and I signed your board.
That's not cool.
No, that's not cool.
Anyway, but.
I almost got to sign the board.
Did he tell you?
No.
I got to 10 points on the special buy, but you can't win off of special buying.
Right.
So I had to wait till it was my turn and he won in between there.
Oh, wow.
Brutal way to lose.
Is that how it works?
Is that how it works with the special buy?
I thought it was like you can't buy something to win on a special buy.
Like you have to wait until it's your turn.
Maybe I'm wrong though.
Maybe you're, I'm wrong.
Catan-FAQs.net.
Use it all the time.
Anywhere I lost.
I made a quick list though of stereotypes of Catan players.
Okay.
It's going to be great for people that play.
Not so great for other people.
So we'll go quick.
Stereotype number one.
Guy that assumes the other person's winning right away. So like, like you get four points and like, guys don't trade,
do not trade with Jake. Jake's Jake has four points. He's going to win. What are you doing?
Oh, it happens to me all the time. When in reality, the first person gets a nine points
is probably not in good shape. No, I always say the hardest it's, it's hardest to close.
Like anybody can get to X amount of like seven, eight, nine points. It's always the hardest it's it's hardest to close like anybody can get to x amount of like seven eight nine points yeah it's always the hardest to get that last one yeah um so that's that's the first
one second one guy that trades at the end of the game so basically the opposite don't oh yeah who
did this isaac i think did this because he was hungry and wanted lunch no i will if he would i
would have lost there's actually somebody in my life that has done that it was like 12 30 at night
and he was like this he's not an old man but like 1230 at night and he was like this, he's not an old man, but he has an old soul. And he's like, like literally he traded seven cards
for one card. He's like, he literally goes, dude, I don't care. I just want to go to bed.
And I was livid at this guy. Like to this day, like his legacy is tarnished with me. So it may
not have been Isaac, but someone did that. And I was like, that was a good trade. And she has nine
and we're all about to win.
No one's trading with anyone here.
Yes, exactly.
Like everyone knows
like there's an embargo.
Is that the right word?
It's great.
I used it several times.
Okay.
Yeah.
There's tariff and bar.
I don't know what all of them mean,
but tariff is tax.
There's an embargo on this.
Like don't trade with them.
And that was actually
one of the biggest fights
of our first year of marriage.
Good.
Because Catherine was just learning
and she had like four points and she's like, no, this
will be good.
This is good for me.
I need these cards.
Catherine, you're so selfish.
I'm like, you don't understand.
He's going to win if you trade him these cards.
And she like, oh man.
And so like literally that was like, we were so mad at each other for that.
So good.
Okay.
Another guy, a guy that goes for the longest road, the whole game, like just like spends
all his time just going through. All right, I need wood and I need brick every
turn. I'll trade you a, yeah. Three or two. Yeah, sure. No problem. Um, um, and then this
one's like classic, like my cousin Corey back in the day, he was always a little, like a
little bit younger than us. Guy that asked for trades that aren't possible and just,
just takes like in like holds grudges because of it's like it's like literally like there's no or any like literally nobody has or he's like
can i can i trade a sheet for an or and everybody would like be quiet he's like well i guess no one
wants to trade with me okay fine cool nobody trade with cory cool yeah yeah gosh it's like
dude pay attention he's like well i'm gonna use my robber then and he puts it on the or and it's
like you're part of the problem um anyway guy that buys a ton of development cards
also just kind of similar like like you're not i i feel like you don't usually win by just getting
storing up the d cards that's what i had to last game i was in a brutal spot and then i did get to
10 points first it can work yeah okay did you sign my box i would never ask your b thank you
unless you're playing with me and Unless I'm peeing with wine.
Two more.
Guy that pretends to do a trade, but really just gives you the same card back to you.
This is the classic McDonald trick.
This is a Catan comedian.
Isaac McDonald, Eli McDonald.
Anybody have wood?
Yeah, yeah, I got wood.
Okay, I'll trade you a brick for it.
He's like, okay, cool.
He puts it upside down, and it's like, this is brick.
This is brick.
We're...
Yes, yes, yes, yes. Isaac thinks it's like, this is brick. This is where. Yes, yes, yes. It's so funny
when that happens. And then the last one is, um, guys that make puns about the resource
cards. Oh, this happened. Anybody have any or, or what? Oh my gosh. Yeah. This is happening
a lot. Saturday. You get, you roll a six and you have sheep on the six, like not bad. You
know, like, Oh, good one. good one wheat is that even legal yet oh yeah
maybe in colorado stoner yeah so thanks you're good those are my catan stereotypes if you want
to make a video is it going to go viral we'll try it go ahead no no no i'll tell you what i had an
idea tonight someone else tagged me in another like multiple tiktoks with like the beach ball
act thing are now going viral yes and i think i'm going to make multiple tiktoks with like the beach ball act thing are
now going viral yes and i think i'm gonna make a tiktok being like hey i've been seeing all these
go viral look at me doing this in like 2013 yeah and i didn't do it with an exercise ball too with
a little beach ball which is harder yeah on a stage it's wearing a tutu yep and i did this move
yours was longer than the ones i've seen too thank you you. There's probably like 45 seconds to a minute.
I feel like yours was easily two minutes.
Yeah.
It's like two 20 or so,
but yeah,
the one that's like 26 or so,
I mean,
I think it's like two 19.
If you count the intro and outro music,
uh,
but yeah,
it's,
um,
three and a half million likes when I got tagged in today.
It's like a pretty massive tick tock.
Oh really?
Yeah.
That's crazy.
How I haven't been on tick tock in a long time.
Have you gotten any more viral ones?
I feel like the first one you did, it was like 1 million, 2 million, whatever. I will say I haven't been on tiktok in a long time have you gotten any more viral ones i feel like the first one you did was like 1 million 2 million whatever i will say i haven't been on that was an
instagram tiktok that someone sent me a link to tiktok okay i haven't been on the tiktok app in
probably two weeks and i definitely haven't posted in months so i don't know okay but i'm gonna make
one you're gonna do it maybe okay i say that a lot and then i don't it's easy to say that thanks
i'm making other videos baby yeah. Yeah. A lot, actually.
Just a few, you know.
Cool.
All right, Brad.
What do you want to talk about?
I got a few things written down.
Zillow, Canada plumber.
Plumber.
Plumber.
I want to hear about it.
Plumber number three.
Yeah.
Oh, number three.
Yeah.
Let's call him...
Oh...
I don't...
Ondrew.
Okay.
It was Ondrew.
Ondrew with an O.
Yeah.
Ondrew.
Ondrew. This sounds like you want to talk about canada ontario drew talking about yeah uh on drew i don't know why that came to mind that's great
on drew came over and once again he's like hey uh you know i'm here for you know shower i'm like
okay are you like pretty filled in ah not really not really. Okay, dang it. Let's do this again.
All right, so it's leaking.
They determined it's a pretty serious leak.
You're gonna have to like drill into the wall.
He's like, oh, really?
He's like, all right,
let me go out and get some tools.
I'm like, man,
I feel like there should be
like someone else communicating this with you.
Like, good thing I remember
what you're supposed to do.
Yeah.
And he comes in,
he's like, okay,
so describe the leak to me.
And I'm like, I don't know.
Like it just,
they said it's something with the pipe behind the wall. He's like, oh, that's right. I do. I'm like, I don't know. Like it just, they said it's something with the pipe behind the wall.
He's like, oh, that's right.
I do remember it's something with the shower head, right?
I'm like, I mean, it's not the, he got me a new shower head, but no, it has nothing
to do with shower head.
He's like, no, no, no.
I'm talking about the shower head, like in the pipe.
I'm like, okay, if we're going to talk plumber terms, talk with your plumbers.
All right.
I don't know.
I don't know.
Sure.
I didn't know there was a second head.
That does kill me.
It's the Medusa of appliances.
Whenever like people just think that we should know, like the reason you're here is because I don't know. Sure. I didn't know there was a second head. That does kill me. The Medusa of appliances. Whenever like people just think that we should know, like the reason you're here is because
I don't know.
Yeah.
Like, like, like a mechanic sometimes will be like, yeah, your rotary, your rotary valve
on here, you know, and the dipstick and, uh, you know, dipstick, look at the, look at the
way it measured on this.
You want to go three quarters or half?
I was like, Oh, what do you recommend?
And it's totally like, you have to be like, yeah, totally.
Cool.
That's crazy. You know, every once in a while I have the courage to be like, sorry, actually, what does you recommend? And it's totally like, you have to be like, yeah, totally. Cool. That's crazy.
You know,
every once in a while I have the courage to be like,
sorry,
actually,
what does that mean?
Like,
you know,
but most of the time it's just like,
so yeah,
like,
Oh,
the showerhead.
No,
you idiot.
I'm talking about the showerhead inside.
That's like this little tiny thing that we don't know about unless you watched,
you know,
unless you went to plumber school.
Yeah.
So I got off the bat.
I'm like to just do it just to just make it happen.
Yeah.
But he does make it happen. He goes very quick and efficiently and he comes back down probably 20 minutes later I'm in the middle watch a Tiger King just felt like I was just in the mood that day
I got a Chipotle burrito and I was like what's on these, you know, the office is off Netflix
I don't have like a go-to thing just put on for 15 minutes while I'm eating
I was like, let's throw throw it back real quick to T. Greg King
Yeah, and so we were talking
about tiger king and he's like you're you're good to go uh well we'll need someone else to come back
out here and like patch up the drywall like the hole that i put in the wall yeah but um yeah you
can still shower in it just don't splash up in there so i guess he's more a sheet rock take her
down or not really a sheet rock put her upper yeah that's fair now another guy yeah it does make
sense another guy is coming to like patch that who knows when he'll be here he'll be like oh you got a hole there huh
so there's okay i've seen a hole above the shower head no oh oh which shower are you talking about
yeah yeah yeah that's so crazy like yeah but it's fixed i've been showering in my own shower now
it's nice really yeah good for you Plumber Saga is over with.
Nice.
And there's no leaking down below.
No, not that I know of.
We're good. So did you figure out specifically, what do you think?
It was just a leak in this shower head thing?
Yeah, he said whoever remodeled the bathroom, didn't fully screw in something, there was
something, you know, plumber talk.
It was like a flip house, I think.
Yeah, it seems like very newly renovated. Yeah, it that's that's like the go-to like i'm just gonna blame whoever
did it before me like that's like that's that's wonderful like oh yeah hey no gosh these these
guys i did the floors before me you should have seen them oh i don't know i don't know why they
did this that's the classic i don't know why they looking at it i don't know why they did this i
wouldn't have done it that way yeah right it's like yeah it's just funny i never i've never just heard somebody be
like no that makes complete sense why they did it this way it's very smart like very ingenious
the electrician you had beforehand is a genius right yeah they will never say that electrical
is always the ones like a lot of man this thing is this thing is all kinds of crazy i mean this
is dangerous yeah i would really probably get this whole thing checked out. Yeah. Like, I'm not going to do that.
Also get your oil changed.
Okay.
In the rotary girder.
That's good.
Okay.
I have a new,
I don't buy it.
Okay.
I got an I don't buy it.
Okay.
So this past week,
pretty much,
actually I saw a stat,
but it was pretty much
the entire United States
was freezing.
Yeah.
And specifically,
I saw this stat
that was like,
the Midwest is like the coldest place on earth today, which is, did you see that?
Dude, this is my, this is right where my, I don't buy it as too.
Okay. I'm excited to hear what yours is about it. But it was like, like it showed you like Russia and Antarctica and all these different things. It was like, like the, the color map
was like coldest. We are the coldest. Yeah, we did it. Um, so here's my, I don't buy it. And it's,
it's kind of more of a flexible, vague idea, but I don't buy super cold. And let me tell you what
I mean by that. This is not what mine was. Okay, good. So it was like, I think it got down to like
negative 10 or 15 at one point, uh, this week, uh, in Kansas. And obviously that's cold, but I think, let's say, let's say the number is
38 degrees. I think anything below 38 degrees, I'm not doing anything outside.
I'm not, I'm not like beyond just like walking to my car, going out to eat. Like, like I'm not,
I'm not socializing outside at 38 degrees, maybe 39. I'll put on some layers and go play pickleball. Probably not,
but you know what I mean? And so it's like, I don't think it's that big of a deal. I don't
think it's that much colder from, because when you're outside for that short of a time from like
walking and I have remote start, I'm not trying to brag, but I have remote start on my car.
And so it's warm when I get in there. So it's like from walking from my door to my car door,
it's not that bad. People that complain about super cold weather or even really just people like Canadians,
Minnesotans that think they're so hard for like, oh, it's like negative 10 here.
It's the exact same feeling for 20 degrees.
I think it's all about, I guess the wind chill.
The wind chill is a little bit different.
Like that makes it a little bit worse.
But most of the time I don't buy it.
Like there was times where I needed to go inside from my shop, and I just had a t-shirt on.
I just walked in it.
It wasn't like, this is terrible.
So I don't buy it.
I have a lot to say.
Okay.
First, I'm pretty sure Spencer Shipley, listener of the pod, he said something like this to
me this week.
He was like, can you feel a difference in 35 and 15?
Cold is just cold.
Yeah.
And I'm pretty sure that was, that we had that conversation.
And?
And I was like, I think I can kind of tell the difference.
Really?
Yeah.
See, I think, okay, go ahead.
Sorry.
I mean, like this week we had some weeks, which I haven't had these like since like
walking to class in college where like you inhale and you could feel your nose hairs
kind of freeze up.
Yeah.
That's when you know it's cold.
It does take your breath away.
I will say that.
Yeah.
So in your specific life, it doesn't affect you that much, but think
how many people like have to take their dog out or like, yeah, walking to class in college. Like
there's a lot of people who have to do stuff outdoors. I'm not, I'm not like disputing. Like
if you're out there longer, obviously you're going to feel it more one way or the other. But
yeah, in my life it's like this isn't that different but like the
difference between 20 degrees and zero degrees seems to me to be like way less significant than
80 degrees and 100 degrees you know i mean like if it's that's a difference to me yeah i guess
i just like the last two weeks it's just been so brutal because it's never gotten above freezing
so everything is still frozen right everything like yeah everything on your cars like it's just been so brutal because it's never gotten above freezing. So everything is still frozen. Right. Everything. Like, yeah.
Everything on your cars.
Like it's just your houses.
Yeah.
I can feel like you can tell a pretty big difference when it's, you know, negative three out, like how cold my living room is.
That's the thing.
It does.
It does make your heater work a lot more.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I just feel like it hasn't affected me that much.
And I'm not trying to be like, obviously, there's other people that are affected.
I'm not trying to be insensitive.
I'm just like, I don't buy it. I don't buy that. Like the cold is that much. And I'm not trying to be like, obviously there's other people that are affected. I'm not trying to be insensitive. I'm just like, I don't buy it. I don't buy that.
Like the cold is that bad. I think I don't, I don't like the winter. I'm excited for warm
weather, but, but I don't think, I don't think if it were 35 degrees this week that my life would
be drastically different. Wasn't today awesome when it was snowing and sunny at the same time.
I've never seen that before. I don't remember. I don't think I noticed that. Oh, it was like 1230
Trey and Derek and I were freaking out. Like, this is awesome. Like if
you could have rainbows in the snow, we would have seen it. I do love the way snow looks like
it's just so idyllic. Good word. Thank you. Yeah. It's just nice. I did like I was getting in the
truck on the way over here and there was like this this patch of snow that was like completely
clean, like no one had touched it. I like how bright it is at night with the snow yes i walked outside last night like 6 30 and it was like it's like summer
you can see what animals have been in your yard i was about to say that too there's like some
crazy tracks everyone's yeah yeah what's that i'm in the burbs yeah we got deers and rabbits it's
crazy yeah all the it's like a whole different ecosystem at night yeah brewing with life i tell
you what my i don't buy it is weather related and it's the sun. Oh.
I don't buy what's going on.
The sun is just,
I know we live on an earth that spins
and is on an axis and is rotating and
orbiting around the sun. Uh-huh.
But just like, we're always
93 million miles away from it. Uh-huh.
Like how does it just get so cold
but I'm going to Phoenix in two days and it's going to be 75?
That's crazy. That's not that far apart.
Yeah.
How?
And I know there's answers to it.
No, it just doesn't make any sense to me.
We are not science people at all.
Yeah.
I just don't buy the sun.
I think there's, I think there's a master thermostat and God has control of it and he's
got the key and he won't let anyone else have it.
And he's just like, um, like the jet stream.
Don't buy it.
That's not real. What is it? I don't even know what that really low pressure, high pressure. Don't
buy it. It's just God and a thermostat. That's all it is. He just, yeah, he's just making
decisions like let's have Kansas city, like the coldest spot in the world. Like that'd
be awesome. We've never done it before. Let's do that. That'll be kind of funny. Yeah. Um,
okay. I don't buy it. That's just me. I just been very confused. Like it's just so cold,
but I can see the sun and it looks the same. Look, it's still 93 million miles away, but I'm so cold.
I will say, and maybe it's a mental thing, but it felt warmer. This goes out so stupid.
It felt warmer yesterday when the sun was really out.
Yeah.
Of course, of course it's warmer.
That's a great point.
Literally the temperature was like the same, I think, or like negative something,
but it felt warmer with the sun out.
I like it in the car because you don't have to turn your heat up as much when the sun
is out.
It's nice.
Yes, dude.
So nice.
Anyway, I just think that's relatable to almost everybody right now.
I know there's people in like Florida.
They're like, huh?
No, it's been awesome here.
But like everywhere else is just dying right now.
Everyone's cold.
So, um, uh, speaking of weather, just one last quick thing.
Did you see the weather channel had a tweet like three weeks ago or so?
It was like,
uh,
good news.
Everyone winter is almost over.
February is going to be the warmest February ever for the United States.
No way.
Yeah.
Like farmer's almanac probably had that more correct than they did.
I wonder how,
yeah.
I wonder what if they're right though.
Still,
maybe,
uh,
I don't know.
Probably not,
but what, because like next week's supposed to be really warm. I think like 50, how yeah i wonder what if they're right though still maybe uh i don't know probably not but
what because like next week's supposed to be really warm i think like 50s 60s in kansas city
no i think all right let's still talk about the weather anyway that's great no can i say one more
thing uh the other day when it was like negative or whatever it was the coldest it had been in
kansas city since 1989 aka the coldest it had ever in Kansas City since 1989, a.k.a. the coldest it had ever been in Kansas City in my whole life.
That's kind of crazy.
Coldest day of my life.
Coldest day of my life.
That's crazy.
That's cool.
Be like, this is the coldest day of my life.
This is the coldest day of my life.
Guys, you get it?
I was born in 1990.
Whatever.
Never mind.
I don't want to.
Now I'm a self-conj. Is it'm, uh, no, it's not about the freaking
weather, dude. I never talked about that. I can't do Canada next. Cause that somewhat
insinuates the weather. So our friend Kirstie Swick, um, sent us something the other day.
She works for a real estate company. I don't know. I think she has a lot of hats that she wears.
I mean, she has spirit day hat. She has, you know, cowboy hat. Um, but one of the things that she does is she hires people or at
least for this job. And she sent us a little snippet of this guy's resume. I assume it's a
guy. Actually, I don't know. Um, first of all, his work experience, it's just an amazing resume.
Um, it looks like, so his last place he worked was called illest LLC.
It's like idyllic.
Yeah.
Illest.
He was a design and illustrator.
Um, he was a design.
Oh, sorry.
Designer, designer and illustrator.
Um, I just love the name illest.
Yeah.
I worked.
So can you tell me about your past experience with illest?
Oh, we did illest.
Oh, let me tell you.
It was the illest oh we the illest oh let me tell you it was the illest and so and then he lists some of his special skills um so let me just tell you first of all
he gives him his myers-briggs and his enneagram infjt advocate and enneagram type 5 type 2 type
7 i don't know how the enneagram works but i thought there was only two i feel like he just
kind of chose he's like yeah that kind of sounds, but I thought there was only 2. I feel like he just kind of chose. He's like,
eh, that kind of sounds like me too. What do you mean only 2?
I feel like 5 wing
X, you know.
And they're supposed to be right next to each other. He said 2, 5, and
7. 5, it says type 5 slash
type 2 slash type 7. He's just going to pick
a lot of numbers and call them his Enneagram. He's just talking about his
diabetes.
I don't know.
But then he gives his skills is that what like people are doing
nowadays they're putting like their personality types on their resume i think this is a little
bit of a casual resume which i have i have fondness for okay um because the the last part is his kind
of special skills it looks like he has here um so we got rebuilding classic cars okay okay okay
okay bicycling okay sure that's a classic car that's that's a fun
thing to do crashing concerts oh james you dog i don't think you have a ticket i know that's my
skill that's one of my skills though and then you're like how does he get in i think it's because
of this fourth skill ventriloquism he put that on skill. Ventriloquism. He put that on his resume.
Ventriloquism.
Yes.
I don't think this guy got the job.
This guy is just hoping that they ask.
So I see a ventriloquism on your resume.
He's like, oh, yep.
So tell me all your time with the illest.
It was dope.
He's got his little puppet over here.
It was insane.
Do you know how ventriloquism works?
It works for you. There you go. Do you know how ventriloquism works? It works.
There you go. I know.
You're like, no, it's just
you have a puppet and you just talk
via the puppet.
Ventriloquism is actually kind of crazy.
Yeah, I met one in real life once.
The doll or the ventriloquist?
The doll.
What do you mean?
What do you mean the person? No the uh the little the oh you don't
know what are you talking about it's the guy like there's somebody like controlling the doll oh like
a robot kind of kind of like a jet stream for uh no it's just like like this guy is actually like
talking but the doll is moving his mouth, but no, his mouth is closed.
Right.
That's what's so crazy about it is like he is doing that inside of his mouth.
He's doing it inside of his mouth.
And that's what's so crazy about it.
Like, but have you ever noticed like the dolls never that far from him and the doll never
talks because he controls it with his leg.
No, he, no dude.
He controls it with his mouth. I think. Oh, it with his mouth i think oh i think now you got
me doubting it yeah i don't know i'm pretty sure that's how it works dang that is impressive no
wonder he put on his resume yeah it's kind of it really is kind of like how did they get so loud
like try to get as loud as you can right now and say any kind of word without without opening your mouth well this is my first time how do you do
that you try to get off the side there's some people I've seen they can like sing
with their mouth closed have you seen that that? No. That's impressive. That's kind of the same thing.
Yeah, I know.
I'm just thinking of it now.
It's so hard.
How do you keep your mouth closed?
I don't know.
There's gotta be certain words that are easier.
I think they're definitely like, I bet they have their mouth like just slightly open so
it doesn't look open.
Like.
Hmm.
Yeah, that's good.
How do you do it?
I don't know.
I don't know how you don't.
All right.
Just say.
You try.
You try.
You try.
Fruit Loops.
Fruit Loops.
Fruit Loops.
I'm just making noise.
That was kind of good.
Tell me something else to say.
Let's go to the market.
Let's go to the market.
Your mouth is open.
No, but that's what i'm
saying like just barely okay okay just like like i want to just like be open enough where like the
wind can get through it okay these are nice headphones these are my headphones
your bottom lip is just like blowing out yeah i know
i hope you guys love this.
I hope you love it.
Wow, this is hard.
I'm going to be worse at this than I am singing.
Kirstie, get this resume back and hire this.
Hire the illest.
Maybe with your teeth.
Hey.
How are we doing today?
Everybody's tough.
And that would also be the crazy thing.
He's like, you can't react
you have to have this guy react so the whole time you just have to be like
what did you say i said do the thing whoa we got to get a ventriloquist on the pod
okay oh speaking of that i think there's a lot of demand oh you really want to get that i was down
really yeah i was down yeah we got some guy like contact us.
It seemed like a good conversation.
I went back and read it.
Yeah.
I was going to kind of mess with them.
Did you see what I said?
I forget.
Tell everyone.
I don't remember exactly what I said, but I said something like vaguely like kind of
messing with them.
Like, uh, do you remember?
Like maybe this is the part I didn't even see, but they were just like, Hey, so what
do you think?
You want to have Brian on the pod?
And Brad's like, I don't know what you're talking about.
And this guy's like, Hey, I'm just here to follow up.
And Brad's like, have we talked before?
And he's like, Hey, I'm just following orders, man.
And Brad's like, I don't really know what's going on.
Yeah.
And then I tried to say something kind of along the lines of like, can you, or he's
like, he's like, what are your guys' thoughts?
And I was like, I don't really know.
Um, what, what are your guys' thoughts or something like, I don't know, something like that. And they were just like, what do you mean? I was like, I don't really know. Um, what, what are your guys' thoughts or something
like, I don't know, it's something like that. And they were just like, what do you mean?
I was like, nevermind. Should've provoked him a little bit. Like this is one of the strangest
DMs I've ever had in the entire globe. Yeah. Right. This is out of, out of the whole wide
round world. I don't know if I've ever heard anything like this. I mean, I could go to
Antarctica and back before I hear something this weird, But yeah, this guy, this guy really, I don't know if you want to have my, we'll have them
on.
I think it'd be awesome.
Okay.
We'll do it.
We should have more guests that are like very strange.
I think ventriloquists and flat earthers are a good place to start.
I want to get one guy who's both.
Oh, I, this guy seems like he was a mixed bag.
Like he, we went on his, or I went on his Instagram account and it wasn't just about
flat earth.
It was like every conspiracy.
Honestly, if we met with this guy, I want to ask him, is there any conspiracy theory
you don't believe in?
Because it seems like he believes in every single one of them.
Anything you've ever heard.
He's like, oh, that's real.
At least according to his Instagram, he kept posting all these different things.
Did he talk about the moon landing?
Cause that was mine.
I think so.
Yeah.
Okay.
Yeah.
I like this guy.
Then we're on the same page. I'm glad we faked it. I'm just going to laugh awkwardly the whole time during that interview. I'm just going to be like,
I don't know what to tell this guy. Cause I'm not good at being like, you're dumb. You're wrong.
No, I wouldn't be, I wouldn't ever say that. I would just, I would be thinking though.
Well, I mean, that's how, that's what living life is like. You don't say the things you think
you find other ways to say things. All right.
So this week, Brad and I, wait, Trey and I, I'm so sorry.
Trey and I had a fun Zoom call with a girl that we're going to be making a video with.
Julie Nolke, I think was her name.
She's been blowing up on YouTube this year. Had like a number one trending video on YouTube and is like really popular, but she's Canadian.
And so we're going to make a video with her about like the US.s versus canada okay kind of thing and so i learned a lot about canada honestly we should
have just recorded the zoom call because it was pretty funny really like she would just like talk
in this accent like oh yeah we'd like pecker biggs and like oh that's funny yeah we could do an
accent thing she's like what are you talking about yeah like you just said biggs and she's like what
are you saying like bag she's like i hear no difference it's like this is hilarious she doesn't
even recognize the difference didn't even recognize the difference oh that's interesting i i just assume that they say it but they know what they're saying like that and it was so difference. It was like, this is hilarious. She doesn't even recognize the difference. Didn't even recognize the difference. Oh, that's interesting. I just assume that they
say it, but they know what they're saying like that. And it was so funny. Trey was like, so I'm
from Oklahoma. Like, do you know, do you know Oklahoma? She's like, yes, I know Oklahoma. I
live in Toronto. And so we just kept giving Trey such a hard time. Like she's not some foreign
exchange student. Like she knows more about us. Yeah. Like saying it slowly for her. Oklahoma
city. Yeah. That's's good it's so funny but
I learned a lot about Canada and you'll see a lot of it the video but Brad I had a few tribute
questions about Canada that I want to ask you let's do it I I'm gonna fail at this Brad what
is a beaver tail um a beaver tail is like instead of putting those cow Rocky Mountain oysters on the back of your truck, you put a beaver tail on the back.
It's like a trailer hitch.
It's like what Chevy Silverado guys put on their cars, you know, to like show that they're a little bit more country.
That's a good guess.
What if I said, ooh, tomorrow, Brad, we should get some beaver tails in the morning.
Pancakes?
Donuts.
Oh, okay.
Close.
Like maybe like long john donuts. Maybe. Beaver tails i feel like are long john shaped i think they are shaped in like a beaver's tail shape
okay okay okay all right what is the term skookum mean skookum it's slang um it's like uh it's like
it's like a prank but um it's like a nice prank so like like, it's like a prank, but, um, it's like a nice prank.
So like, let's go.
Let's yeah.
Hey, let's go scoop this guy by washing his car.
Let's let's go.
Let's go scoop him.
He comes outside.
Whoa.
Whoa.
Is my car get waxed?
I've been scooped.
You scoop comes me.
Uh, kind of close again.
This is something that's like really well built.
Oh, like this chair. It's pretty scoop. Wait, how do you spell it s-k-o-o-k-e-m okay sorry
yeah what were you thinking c-k
all right wow skookum is an adjective yeah it's like this is oh this is nice this is skookum yeah
yeah oh wow you can come over i got a nice i got a Skookum rocking chair. That sounds so unnatural.
This thing is Skookum.
Like, I deliver at Alice's Custom Creations table, and they're just putting their hand
around it.
Oh, this.
Like, I've had factory tables all my life, but this thing, this is Skookum.
This is Skookum, eh?
She said eh a lot.
Not the opposite of Skookum. Brad is skookum, eh? She said eh a lot. Not the opposite of skookum.
Brad, what is the garburator?
Garburator.
Garburator is the ice maker, but the ice maker specifically for Tim Horton's coffee shop.
Nice.
So it's like, hey, Patrick, did you fix the garburator
or is everyone just going to have
lukewarm soda pop?
They do call it pop. They don't call it soda up there.
Good for them. I like Canada for that.
They call it pop. Tim Hortons is big.
Bonus question,
what is it equivalent to of
us here in the States?
Starbucks?
No, they have Dunkin'. Yeah, they have tons of Starbucks there, but it's their Dunkin'.
Okay.
And a Garburator is the garbage disposal.
Oh, okay.
Yeah.
Catherine says disposal.
That's not good.
That's not right.
That's not right.
Yeah.
Garburator.
I like this.
Two more questions.
Please.
This is a good one.
What do you think homo milk is?
Homogenized milk?
It's three and a half percent milk.
That's cool.
Why don't we have more options?
I don't think the US can handle homo milk.
I don't think we're ready for it yet.
You call it homo milk?
Yeah.
Why not just ho milk?
Ho milk.
Oh, but then they were good.
Hey, can I get some ho milk?
Yeah, you ho bag. Their milk comes in bags. Bags. Dude. They have milk bags. whole milk whole milk oh but then they were good hey can i get some whole milk yeah yeah whole bag
their milk comes in bags bags dude they have milk bags i have i have a random uh irrational
strong opinion about the container in which milk comes in kind of grosses me out when it doesn't
come in a like jug like uh have you ever been to like mexico like or in trinidad like their milk
was in like these like weird in these weird bags or cardboard.
I don't know.
It kind of grossed me out.
I don't think it grosses me out.
I think if it were a jug, it would be okay.
Like any cafeteria milk you ever had in college, that's out of a bag.
And that chocolate milk was nice.
Dang.
That's a good point.
Yeah.
Because that's...
Yeah.
Okay.
I take it back.
Okay.
Last question.
Who is on their dollar bills?
Gretzky.
Gretzky? Or Gzky or Gretzy?
Oh, Gretzy.
Oh, Aunt Gretzy.
Gretzy.
How's she doing?
Goldie Hawn.
Who's on their dollar bills?
Gretzky.
Gretzky's a good...
Beaver.
Beaver.
Beaver.
It's the Queen of England.
Oh, really?
She's like their queen.
Even though they have a
Prime Minister and like a Governor General. I learned
a lot about their political system.
The Queen of England still like
kind of looks over Canada.
Who knows?
Not me. I did not know any of that.
Yeah. Really? That's what Julie said.
Who's this Prince Edward guy that gets his own island?
That is Prince Edward.
But he doesn't get any kind of
recognition on the loonies
and the toonies? Nice, loonies.
Thank you. I don't know.
We didn't cover that.
I don't think Prince Edward is on Currency in Canada, no.
Dang. He gets his own island, though.
There you go. Okay.
That's Canada for you.
That's everything I got from Canada.
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Brad, I have an idea. I need you to talk me out of it, Iffect.ucc.on.ca. Brad, I have an idea.
I need you to talk me out of it, I think.
Okay.
Idea.
Yeah.
You know, I've been getting into investing more in the last couple months.
You know, had Bitcoin for a couple years.
And I was like looking, this is obviously not news to anyone else, but I'm like, hey, as it turns out, as I'm starting to look at things,
I think buying a house is one of the better investments you can make. Oh yeah. I realized that this week. I was
like, I should probably do that. Yeah. Not because I want to upkeep a house, but just, it seems like
a smart adult thing to do. Especially when you're having all these plumbing issues, like, man,
this looks fun to have these responsibilities on my own. I want to pay for this. Yeah. Yeah.
Awesome. So my idea is, uh, buy this $800,000 home that I found in Liberty that's got a gym in it
and a pool and a big yard and a bunch of really cool stuff, a recording studio in the house
and fill it with eight dudes that pay for my mortgage.
What's 20% of $800,000?
So the down payment's going to be a little tricky.
$160,000? grand i'm gonna have to
go the uh 3.5 fha loan that's all that's all you gotta know don't do that don't don't do that what
about this you ever pmi i used to say don't go there now i say pmi what about this go ahead i
don't know about pmi but something mortgage insurance i'm'm guessing. Okay, new idea. Brad, you and I,
I have a business opportunity for you.
It's your lucky day.
This beautiful house in Missouri.
You'll love it.
It's a great idea.
Great opportunity for you, Brad.
Me, you, Mr. James, maybe.
Okay.
And one other person you're choosing.
Who do you want?
Say it right now.
Five, four, three, two.
My dad.
And Dean. dean okay so the
four of us all split the down payment together okay and then whenever it sells we also split
that evenly as well okay so what's what's five percent of eight hundred eight hundred thousand
dollars five percent so one percent would be eight thousand so forty thousand you got 40 grand ready to spend? I do not have that in liquid assets.
Liquid.
Is it in bags?
I know it's frozen probably right now, but you can.
Nice.
Thanks.
Okay.
So we get a couple more people in on it.
Name another couple of people.
So there's me and James.
We each recruited three people.
And then you get three people. Next thing James. We each recruited three people. Yeah.
And then you get three people.
Next thing you know,
we got a house.
Yeah.
And it's only going to open value.
80 people are living in it.
Yes.
It's kind of,
they would call it the slums of Liberty.
Okay.
It would go in the papers.
Yeah.
Um,
so.
All right.
Do you want in?
What's it going to be?
What do you think?
Um,
I think, I think that's a bad idea, Jake.
Dang.
Because I think you would...
I don't know if you've ever watched The Big Short,
but I kind of understand it after watching it three times.
Okay.
I don't think that's good to buy a house you can't afford.
I think that there's...
And I don't think the banks are going to give it to you,
to be honest.
Dang it.
I think they've learned from their mistakes.
I have a couple of tax returns right here, though.
Yeah.
Check it out, though. Keep sending to this address check it out fun fact you have to
be self-employed for two years and have like good taxes before you can ever get like a loan that's
why we get dean involved okay so now now dad's footing the whole bill yeah yeah he's the main
guy we just put it on the table to him and they're gonna be like now how'd you get 120,000 extra
dollars in your bank account this year?
This is great. No, this is great. I'm trying to find
ways for Peter. Yeah. Our real
estate friend to make 3%. Deep pockets,
big pockets, whatever the podcast
that he loves is called. Liquid pockets.
He probably would love that.
Yeah. 3% is a lot on
$800,000. You're welcome, Peter.
We just figured out 5% is $40,000 so
it's $20-some thousand. $27.50? 50, 24, 24,000. Close. Told you. And so, um, I don't know. One of my
friends is from Memphis, but he's a Kennecott guy. So he loves Branson, like loves Branson more than
any of us. Like good. Still goes back every single summer to be a doctor. Um, he's like the only
doctor that doesn't have kids that go to camp there. Starting to get a little creepy.
But he like really wants
to buy this plot of land
outside of Branson
and we all like split it.
We all like have like
a vacation house there
or something
and we just like split it
throughout the year.
That sounds more realistic to me
if it's like $150,000.
Does he need another guy?
Probably.
Tell him I'm in.
Tell him.
I don't need any details. I'm in. I in i'm so i don't care what they are yeah anyway so i was really drawn in by
the recording studio i didn't even really listen to what i heard you say home gym you said it's
got like a bunch of like amenities that like yeah most houses don't have it's like this would be
cool i have access to i don't know why most houses don't have. It's like, this would be cool to have access to. I don't know why most houses don't have this, dude.
Yeah, they should just start putting this in all these houses.
No, okay.
This is a little bit, not serious, but not joking.
So I guess serious.
I listened to a podcast the other day, Jefferson Bethke and somebody else.
My friend.
Yeah, what's it called?
Dad's Building Something.
Oh, is this the Lego thing?
Maybe.
Okay.
I don't think so.
Okay.
Are you talking about like the CDOs and the big short?
No.
Jefferson Bethke, another guy, did this podcast I listened to, and it was talking about like
the strength of like extended families and stuff, specifically like close extended family,
like your parents and your sisters and brothers and stuff like that.
And like they were an advocate for like pooling your money and buying a house together.
Let's go Jeff.
So Jeff knows.
And like,
and like,
because you can,
you can buy an $800,000 house that you can then like basically make into
different houses,
like make into different units.
Yeah.
Like a fourplex.
Yeah.
But then you would like live like kind of under the same roof and like,
you know,
your kids would learn from your grandparents and you know,
whatever,
like there'd be like this much stronger bond and they would, cause, cause like so much now is like this
dream of like, I want to get out on my own, have my own house, my own place and do things by myself.
And it's like, maybe that's the wrong way of thinking. Maybe we need to like reverse that.
And you know, now all live together and like really strengthen each other. So I'm going to
take that and I'm going to make a bunch of like 16 year old kids who are big on Tik TOK, my extended family,
perfect. And I'm going to pimp them out and make them 40 Tik TOKs a day. And you can't eat supper
and you can't leave the house. They call me Gator. Mow the lawn. You have to mow the lawn. It's huge.
We have to mow this. Someone pick up the pool. You can tick talk mowing the lawn. People will love it. Make it out of content. Yeah. I don't care. Axton, you figure it out.
Axton. That's his name. That is absolutely. I want Axton and Jamie and Presley and everyone
else. Yeah. And Ashley Tisdale. I'm not budging on Ashley. I want Tisdale in there
and they pay for the house. Good. They're my extended family. Good. Okay. That's my idea.
Okay.
Good luck with that.
Isaac said the other day that he wants to have a house.
He wants to buy a house by the time that everybody else his age would be graduating college,
which I think sounds so cool.
That is awesome.
Yeah.
So maybe he wants to get on the Liberty house.
Maybe.
Maybe.
Hey, I'm Jim.
Figure those back issues out.
Oh, like, yeah.
If anybody, if anybody like is obsessed
with it like something it's Isaac. He always just
like I want to buy a house
and he just looks at houses for days.
I want to buy a new truck. He looks at
trucks for days. He's like I think I can figure this out. I think I can
afford this thing. I'm like no you can't.
Pay Jake back.
Only $3,000.
Oh man. Should we get some voice
moments? Please.
Okay.
Yeah, let's do it.
Hey, guys.
What do you think about keeping your head tiger?
Found out you can buy a cub for $2,000,
and it's legal to own in like 22 different states.
That's it?
That's it.
10 seconds.
What was it?
Keeping a what tiger?
Red tiger?
Let me see.
Keeping a red tiger? Hey, guys.
What do you think about Keeping a what tiger? Red tiger? Hey guys, what do you think about
keeping a red tiger?
Kind of sounded like you said an overhead tiger.
I'm looking up a red tiger.
Oh my gosh. Surely that's
not real. Are they cute?
They're red. Surely this is fake.
There's not many of them.
I've never heard of it.
And I know cats. Keeping a I know cats keeping a red tiger
keeping a red tiger
overhead tiger I'm gonna look it up
just to make sure
Caleb we needed this annotated
red tiger what
I'm looking no way that's fake
that's fake yeah
he probably said tiger I think tiger king
was pretty clear on like maybe
some of the downfalls of
owning a tiger.
Um,
and I feel like you probably just shouldn't.
Yeah.
They're pretty cute.
That's the red tiger is the $800,000 house.
Yeah.
It's just because it's legal.
It doesn't mean you should do it.
It's fun for like maybe a couple of months and then it's like,
Oh buddy,
this is really expensive every month.
Yeah.
But maybe you should. Maybe, maybe, maybe you should. If you can get a tiger and a couple months and then it's like oh buddy this is really expensive every month yeah but maybe you should maybe maybe but maybe you should if you can get a tiger and a couple other people to like go halves he's on the tiger with you okay i get the front legs you get its
mouth i've always said just in general i do not ever want a cat and i've i've been very firm on
that with katherine and a tiger is a type of cat, FYI.
You're right.
So no cats in my house.
I stay firm on that.
Catherine brings it up every once in a while still.
And I'll be very lenient on a lot of things.
Not the cat thing.
Not the cat thing.
It irks her, to be honest.
But I have to do it.
I have to do what Big Daddy wants, you know?
Yeah.
I'm the only big cat in the house.
What about Catherineatherine dang it
she's not big though good she's got a great figure pass the test let me tell you figure
how's your mom how's how's that mom how's that mom how's that mom doing huh she's good you're
driving you're a forerunner better off probably a buick huh oh yeah you like encores turn around
baby give me another encore.
I'm getting a living room, huh?
Okay, okay.
You a sporty girl.
You a sporty girl, you like the Mazda Miatis, huh?
Oh, you like to put it in sport mode.
Oh, okay, okay.
Sure.
How'd you like to put it in sport mode for Santo, huh?
Oh, you a Jeep girl?
You like getting a four-wheel drive on the Wranglers.
I'll give you a Wrangler.
Yeah.
Everything's just creepy used cars.
Yeah, it just sounds so creepy
stratus i'm trying to change my facebook status huh what do you think meet me out back
oh i got a deal under the table forerunner that's so dirty yeah i'm jewish
end of story yeah i'm not gonna go there
give me some skin yeah you get it yeah yeah yeah yeah google sheets google sheets
uh i don't want tiger i don't i don't want honestly the more i think about it somebody
asked for the patreon like what was made brad scared of animals like somebody asked scott about
that i think i am kind of scared of just animals in general.
Okay.
After the,
well,
I hadn't tell if you're on patron,
you'd know about the raccoon story after the,
what else happened to me?
Kind of with,
Oh,
the chickens,
the chickens,
the chickens,
something else in your yard,
the squirrel in my yard,
dead squirrel in your yard.
Oh yeah.
There's dead squirrel in my yard.
There was a Hawk one time,
like kind of circling our yard,
and I was nervous if I went outside that it was going to attack me.
Pick you up.
I'm scared of deer.
We talked about that.
I'm just a little bit...
Anything I can't control, anything that doesn't have logic to me,
I can't just be like, hey, raccoon, I'm not going to hurt you.
I'm just trying to get inside to my kids.
The raccoon doesn't know. Most are not going to hurt you. I'm just trying to get inside to my kids. Like the raccoon doesn't know.
Most are not going to understand that.
Most.
So I don't want any of that in my house.
Yeah, I've always said for a long time,
I still have a bucket list somewhere in my notes.
And it's cool.
Like I've completed like four out of the six things on there.
Like one of them was just like go to Hawaii
and like get on a game show or whatever.
And one of them is like own an exotic feline cub,
baby cheetah baby tiger
i've always wanted to do that okay but yeah as i get older i'm like man golden retrievers are like
yeah really awesome and you don't have to feed them an entire steak every morning and doesn't
it feel like like dogs you can you can train and i don't i don't trust my training of a tiger ever
i will never fully trust that i will say you told me that years ago and you were like steadfast in
your belief i do not trust myself to train a tiger i did i was like yeah one of the first
things i said to you uh-huh like i'm an es fj and i do not trust myself with tigers i'm not good
ventriloquism no thanks for the voice vivo though yeah 10 seconds appreciate it hey jake and brad this is like my 10th time doing this my wife is laughing
at me uh anyway hunter he's uh the guy who got me hooked on your your podcast what's up he's the guy
with with the la croix after a spoonful of ice cream anyway he texted me a while ago asked me
if i wanted to be in a wedding with uh one of his. And the thing is, it's a friend. I have no idea
who he is. I might
have met him before, but do not remember him.
Don't recognize his picture.
Anyway, I wanted to ask
you guys, hey, should I go or
should I stay?
You should definitely go. 100%.
It happens to be the same time as my anniversary
with my wife. Just seems like it's a little bit
of a confliction there. You should should definitely stay also wanted to ask you guys if uh what the most random
thing is that you have been invited to that seems like super personal with someone you don't know
and that's all i have i you gotta go that's that birds, one stone. You do it for your wedding anniversary.
You're like, Hey, for our anniversary this year, let's go somewhere that has really nice food.
And like, we can do like dinner and dancing. We do a little dance, dinner and dancing. Always
the girls love it. Just, I don't know if it's the alliteration or just like, just the idea of being
out there. My husband is so ideal. Yeah. Dinner, dancing ideals. And so you, then you flip it and
you're like, actually, you're going to be in the audience watching me, you know, as I'm up there,
um, honoring a guy, I don't know, but it'll be great. It'll be great. Uh, we'll have,
we'll have dinner afterwards. I think as long as you don't have to sit at like the groomsman's
table at the reception, then you should do it. But if you have to be separate the whole night,
then probably don't go and take her with you.
But yeah, if you get to enjoy the reception together and like the drive there together, I think it's a fun memory.
I'm just imagining like the groom's table at the reception and you asking them questions
of like that you have no, like to somebody you would ask like that you don't know at
all.
Like, so what do you do?
How do you know?
Groomsman.
How do you know Ben?
Yeah.
Oh, nice. Me too. Well, not in the same way that you do but yeah it's similar yeah mutual friends right oh like what were you at church oh you're muslim oh wow okay where do you go to um
you know how does that work yeah so you probably know which way East is, huh?
That's awesome.
Sure.
That's awesome.
You're like, well, excuse me.
Oh, you need to go to the bathroom.
No, I need to go pray.
You jerk.
I don't know.
Um, yeah, you, you definitely have to be able to spend time with your wife.
That's, that's number one priority.
I think challenges.
Yeah.
It has to come with like a little stipulation.
Like, okay, this is now I'm speaking to his wife a little bit like hey
you can let your husband go
and like plan this if you can even call it that
for your anniversary but in return he has to do something
for you what does he have to do for you he has to say
a little something at the rehearsal dinner even though he doesn't
know the groom at all he has
to give a short speech
and obviously it could be serious but still you
have to give up like hey in the short time I've known
been here that'd be pretty funny and like it's just under eight hours like
just like kind of guess yeah like what if it's like completely wrong like you know um it seems
like we're both pretty similar in the fact that we love chipotle he's like i'm vegetarian i don't
know it's like yeah yeah well um i've spoken like a true lefty, right? Southpaws unite. Give me some skin.
So I'm not Jewish.
So anyway, I, yeah, let's, let's double up.
First of all, is it, is, is he, is it one of those things where it's like an, I love
you man situation where the guy just needs a groomsman in general?
Or is it like a, you know, Southern bell thing where the girl has needs a groomsman in general or is it like a you know southern bell
thing where the girl has literally 15 bridesmaids and he needs to be number 15 on the groomsman
side because if that's the case that's a party like that's just fun it's gonna be a nice just
with the boys hanging out i'm on the fifth tier i'm on the fifth tier of the wedding steps
just hanging out and so uh yeah i think that'd be fun but or what if you get the girl get your
wife be like hey i'll do it if my wife can also be a bridesmaid yeah if i can walk down the aisle
with her i'm sure the bride didn't like choose how many bridesmaids she's having based on how
many best friends she has she probably has an open slot yeah i'm sure that's very normal yeah
or somebody's like got spooked by, like I can't make it.
Okay, I have an alternate, so joke's on you.
Boom. Sandra, you're in.
Question answered.
Yeah, good luck, man.
Thank you. That's funny.
Yeah.
Hey, Jake and Brad.
It's Abigail from Northern PA.
Oh.
And I love the podcast.
I listen to it in the morning while I get ready for the day,
and then I finish it at night
when I'm drowning out
the obnoxious loud noises
of my hamster
while I'm trying to sleep.
Oh.
So anyways,
I just wanted to say
That's how I thought
that sentence was going to end.
I listened to your episode
a couple weeks ago
and you got to stop being a sissy
because I grew up
on Scott toilet paper
and trust me,
you get used to it.
And Brad,
can you please look up the youtube
channel cuckoo kangaroo and tell me if you knew your co-host was part of the children's youtube
channel and anyways love the podcast i feel like you guys are my best friends that i've never
actually met uh love you bye abigail thank you for the question. I think that was kind of a Dwight Schrute there.
Like the famous quote, like, don't get me started on how coddled the modern anus is.
That's Abigail.
She's like, you're fine with Scott toilet paper.
When's a little sandpaper on your skin hurt anyone?
She's like the acquired taste of, you know, the bathroom.
Like, you'll get used to it.
It's fine i don't really trust any kind of
advice coming from somebody who is choosing to have a hamster make noise the entire night
you're just trying to have like quiet solitude and rest yeah i don't i don't need especially
like comfort advice like hey i know you're uncomfortable with this toilet paper here's
suck it up because i i buy this thing that really doesn't bring me any kind
of joy. The hamster? Get the hamster
out. Take it away. Sell it to a little
kid. Get a red tiger.
Replace it. Red tigers are all
the rage. I looked up this
cuckoo kangaroo.
First of all, they're K's, not
C's. That was embarrassing.
I guess
the guy looks like Jake. Is he white?
Oh, okay. He does kind of
look like me then probably. He's more ginger than you
are. Okay.
Like in the way he carries himself or like in the
redness of his hair? I think both.
Okay. But I can't tell.
I don't think I carry myself that gingerly.
I actually do think you kind of sometimes. Like,
hold that cup.
That's pretty ginger.
Really ginger.
I always hold it too.
Yeah.
I mean,
yeah.
You want to see for yourself.
Let me see for myself.
That doesn't look like me as much as when sometimes other people text me
pictures and say,
this guy looks like you.
And I'm like,
Oh,
that does kind of look like me.
Yep.
All that.
Uh,
there was somebody on Instagram one time that like did a cartoon like they were
watching some movie and they're like i didn't know that ghostwriters were on this movie it was like
this big dude and this little guy and it kind of looked like us remember that no okay that's
awesome it was awesome good memory uh what else abigail's saying i don't know scott toilet paper
yeah she's the choir taste like no it's fine once you like really really really get used to it here's the misconception about cheap toilet paper versus nicer toilet paper is that cheap toilet paper is bigger and
will last you longer but the misconception is that you need way more of that cheap toilet paper
every time you wipe with the small one you can really really maximize like a few sheets so i so
i i think that actually the small ones may last a little bit
longer or at least as long and they're doing much, much better job on your tuchus.
You hear that, Abigail?
So Abigail, think again.
Thanks for the voice memo though.
Hello, Jake and Brad. Ashley from Illinois here. Just calling to tell you guys about a funny time
I had in Florida about a month ago. My husband Jake and our best friend Jack came along and we did a hot tub prank. And the prank
was that what are the odds you take off your swim trunks in the pool? Keep in mind, he did have
underwear underneath. But nevertheless, that was crazy. So he did it. He got the number and he did
it. And a little boy walks in with his goggles on and a little snorkel thing with his whole family and he puts
on the gear gets right in the hot tub and looks in the pool and exclaims mom what are these and
points at the swim trunks sinking to the bottom of the pool oh my beaver tail that was absolutely
hilarious and we're absolutely dying laughing and my husband somehow kept a straight face the entire
time took about a half an hour to reach you at the swim trunks,
but we did it
and it was hilarious.
So my question is,
what is your favorite vacation prank
and may I use it
the next time I'm on vacation?
Thank you guys for the podcast.
Love you both.
Bye-bye.
Do you have specific pranks
that are like categorized
like vacation,
first day of school,
DMV,
for eight-year-olds,
playground,
dentist prank, eight to 12, 13 to 16, First day of school, DMV. For eight-year-olds. Playground. Dentist prank.
Eight to 12, 13 to 16.
When the power's out prank.
When you got Scott toilet paper.
When it's negative 10.
When your mom's at Miss Wilkinson's yoga class prank.
When you're doing that thing for free.
When you're acting like a New Yorker.
Ventriloquism prank.
Fast food.
Fast casual food.
High-end dining.
Performance couch prank.
When you're at the cell phone store.
Economy parking at the airport prank.
Seedless watermelon prank.
When you're at the organic farmer's prank.
Yeah.
When you're filming girls in the fall for a prank.
TurboTax online prank.
When you're at a salon, but you're a guy,
but you're getting your hair cut still,
so it's okay prank.
Forgetting to take your laundry from the washer
to the dryer on a Thursday prank.
When you're a groomsman in a wedding that you don't know,
but you're a good friend to Henry, Caleb, whatever his name is,
can't find Q-tips, so you just use your car keys prank.
This couch isn't even a prank anymore.
How can he even do this?
Selling your hamster to a blind
kid prank.
Forgetting the movie you watched two nights ago prank.
When you're exchanging your loonies for
your toonies for your dollars prank.
Going across the border.
Yeah.
When you buy a limo
and you go across country
with your friends to try to get on a talk show for somebody that you kind of sometimes watch and you do good things for people and you go on all 48 states plus Canada and Mexico and you make a video about it, prank.
College prank.
You think maybe you got a zit you could pop.
So you go to pop it and it turns out it's just blood
and then you're like i think i made a a neutral situation worse i should have never done this
from the beginning prank when when you yeah yeah perfect so anyway our vacation
why do people ask so many prank things we've been asked six times over voicemails because
we're ornery boys. Not really.
No, we're not at all.
We're very nice guys.
What were we just talking about?
Right before the episode started.
We were like, yeah, we were such rule followers.
I was like, these headphones that we got for Christmas from our awesome fans,
for whatever reason, to me, they feel better if the right headphone is on the left side
and vice versa.
But I know that the right one is labeled on the right, so I have to put it on the right headphone is on the left side and vice versa. And, but I know that it's like the right one is labeled on the right.
So I have to put it on the right, even though it feels more comfortable, even though if
I'm like in my bed at night by myself and I put them on, I check, it's like, dang it,
it's on the wrong way, but it felt nice because we're good boys.
We're good boys.
We follow the rules.
We follow all the rules.
Um, will you go back to your, um, Canada quiz real quick?
Do you have it up still?
I can remember. What do you mean it up still? I can remember it.
What do you mean?
Okay.
Just, okay.
So like the situation she gave about the, about the.
It was kind of a crazy story.
What kind of hot tub is this?
Yeah.
And the little boy that goes, what are those?
So I think, I think we just need to answer it with all the different things that are
the Canadian words.
So.
Oh.
What are those?
That's what we call our beaver tail.
That's a beaver tail.
Oh, I mean, it's a skookum hot tub.
You can find anything down there.
Those are our skookums.
Oh, that is the Queen of England.
I call that one Queen Elizabeth III.
Ask your mom.
Ask your mom.
She'll know.
She'll know.
You know, he pulls up one pair of swim trunks and then, wait, and there's another pair of
swim trunks.
What are these?
Oh, that?
That's Homo milk.
That is Homo milk.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
What was the carb...
That's a Garburator.
That's what my wife calls my Garburator.
It's on the fritz right now, so don't...
You gotta jimmy it.
Yeah.
You gotta jimmy it yeah you gotta jimmy it yeah you're drinking me around
oh my goodness jim from subway uh jared okay um that's yeah okay what are our favorite vacation
breaks i'm trying to think i think i talked about on the podcast the only one i could think of
is when we went to australia uh grant huderberg and I had the thing where he said uh Grant has this weird thing it's just don't bring up spike ball and
honestly it's going to be better if you don't even let him see it everyone's gonna have a better time
on the trip if you do not let him see there's playing spike ball and we never told anyone to
this day they don't know that that's fake they don't know why Grant doesn't like spike ball we
just said I just can't get into it. But just do not let
Grant see a spike ball set.
Oh, I love it. Which is kind of funny. That's like my favorite
kind of joke. That
was what I was thinking. Mine was more generic of like,
I just love going up to people and
pretending like you know them, even though you don't.
Just in general. Especially if
it's a youth conference or something like that, and all
these kids have shirts on that have their names on the back.
Jessica! Oh, whatever. So it's like kind conference or something like that and all these kids have shirts on that have their names on the back jessica oh whatever so it's like kind of this like made-up story like
whatever you want to call it like that that's my kind of humor and that's what we were doing the
fourth of july too with grant's friend noah doesn't hey yeah yeah been a while since seeing
you you still uh going to welding school or what hey how many categories you have for your pranks
uh yeah i think i to me to me that's like the the craziest
prankiest onerous i get is like this made like telling white lies yeah kind of like that
instagram caption thing i used to always do yeah where it was like it's not really a true story
but i'm like trying to start something that's not really yeah instigate yes so that's that's
what i got told the story on the patreon episode with ty and kyle but it's not
really a prank but just more um something that happened a hot tub while we're vacationing we're
in utah and great tubs in utah good tubs tubs in the top scookum tubs hey let's go tub in the top
tub of the tub scookum tubs scookum and this was like a very poor stretch of time for us like we
had just been in uh las vegas and it was so hot and it was sweaty, disgusting.
And like Utah was our oasis.
We finally get there and we're just trying to like sneak into hotels, pools or hot tubs just to kind of like shower.
Sneak them, sneak them.
Sneak and scoop them.
And we park at this one like taco place and we're going to try to like sneak into this hotel.
Well, Ty is just like kind of exhausted and nasty.
He like takes off a shirt and just like lays on top of the limo
and just like laying there.
And Ty's the one with like the super long,
like kind of curly hair.
And meanwhile, Kyle and I go ahead
and like sneak into the hot tub
and we're there with like another couple that's in there.
Not another couple.
They were the only couple.
Another pair of people. Yeah. And they don't see us come from the limo. couple that's in there not another couple they were the only couple and
they're they don't see us come from the limo they just ask after a while like
what's going over there what's that girl doing and Kyle goes I don't know they
were looking at I do like I don't know what that girl is doing and then of
course it wasn't but a minute later Ty comes down and just comes and sits with
us he's like what's up boys hey dude like put everyone in a weird spot except for ty who didn't know do you think if you would
have pretended like you didn't know him he would have caught on and like played along maybe yeah
i don't know why we did it it just felt so uncomfortable just like hey man hey girl what's
that girl doing what's that girl doing like i don't know what's that girl doing? What's that girl doing? Like, I don't know. What's that girl doing in that limo?
Oh, man.
Okay.
Okay.
Let's see.
What else?
Here we go.
Hey, Jake and Brad.
This is Kimberly calling from Colorado Springs, Colorado.
And I just wanted to let you know that we have a local minor league baseball team here in Colorado Springs called The Vibes.
Let's go.
Are you ready for that?
Are you ready for that? Are you ready for that?
So anyway, if you ever wanted to come and see a game,
you could get some vibes up in that game.
And their mascot is none other than a s'more,
which I can't figure out if that makes sense or not.
So anyway, love the podcast.
Keep up the good work, guys.
Thanks. Bye.
I feel like we're picking on people a lot lately.
And I kind of like it,
but I don't cause I want to encourage people to please leave voice. It's so much fun leaving
these voices. Well, they're coming in hot. So I think we're doing something right. Okay. It's
just funny to me that they, she said it and then she goes, are you ready for that? Are you ready
for that? It's like, it's like you surprise somebody and then you hide. Like, yeah. It's
like, are you ready for this? After you already say it.
That's funny to me.
You get done watching Super Bowl.
You guys check that out?
Yeah.
Yeah, I did just check it out.
Yeah, you have a Super Bowl party.
You're like, so anybody want to come over and watch Super Bowl?
Anybody?
You ready for that?
Wait, wait, wait.
You mean like next year?
No, no, like this year.
Like the Chiefs are going to win for sure.
You ready for that?
Yeah.
All right. Sorry, Kimberly that? Yeah. All right.
Sorry, Kimberly.
Kimbo.
Kim VP.
Kimbo Slice.
What'd she ask us?
I'm pretty sure she didn't ask a question.
She just said, are you ready for that?
Okay.
I think Harrison already discovered this.
I mean, he's been big on the vibe strain.
His Instagram story right now is like the, did you see it?
It's like the classic old Walmart, like yellow smiley face, but instead of where the smile
is, it's just his vibes and like a crescent moon.
I thought it looked a little like a zipper
on the guy's mouth though.
Oh, it's metaphor probably.
I was going, oh, maybe.
Don't silence the vibes.
Oh, maybe.
You can have some vibes over here, dude.
Get them out.
That's deep, dude.
He's deep.
Deep, dude.
Oh, you're so deep, dude.
Wow, okay.
Good for him.
Like when you're going deep with your dudes, prank.
Oh.
No, I miss it.
I mean. going deep with your dudes prank oh no i missed it i mean it's a good laugh oh yeah i remember the s'mores thing like harrison discovered this a couple weeks
ago uh and it's pretty cool i don't think it registered with me that that's an actual team
though he showed me this s'more but that's crazy that's a real team minor league baseball is the
best like Montgomery biscuits yeah trash pandas yeah i think that's crazy. That's a real team. Minor league baseball is the best. Like Montgomery biscuits. Yeah. Trash pandas. Yeah. I think that's like, they're, they're just like embracing like,
Hey, we can make some funny things here. El Paso has the Chihuahuas. That's not that crazy,
but it's like, who would ever want to be on the Chihuahuas? No, but anyway, yeah, just fun. I'm
sure there's a ton of them out there. Colorado vibes, dude. Colorado Springs vibes. I would
like some Colorado Springs vibes. Colorado Springs is. I would like some Colorado Springs vibes.
Colorado Springs is a great place. Really
big fan of it. I've never been. Go sometime.
Nice springs. Good
springs. Glenary. Skookum Springs?
Skookum. Very Skookum Springs.
Skookum. Yep. That's great.
Speaking of minor league baseball we've talked about it off
the pod but me, Harrison and Isaac have plans
to get season tickets to Kid City
minor league baseball but it's not even Have we we talked about this yes you told me one time it's not even
minor league baseball it's unaffiliated with any major league team it's just like i mean just
amateur below minor leagues yes yeah so i don't even know if they get paid or how it works it's
just like very like paid much yeah you know i can't imagine the love of the game you know for
the love of the game but they're like rebranding.
They've got a new name this year and we decided we're going to be super fans.
We're going to get season tickets because they are dirt cheap to go to every
single game.
And we just want to become super fans.
That's awesome.
I'm just like,
especially like one guy and just treat him like he is like the biggest deal,
like get them on the pod and just freak out.
Oh,
that'd be fun.
Oh,
it's fun.
Romingas.
I can't wait.
I'm seeing you in person.
That'd be really cool.
I work at finance during the day.
Right.
Wow.
That's awesome.
I work at Northwestern Mutual.
Yeah.
Eight to five every day.
I'm late.
I'm late to the game on Tuesday.
We have a quarterly meeting.
But I saw this week, Christian Colon.
Remember, he's on like our World Series team.
He's playing for the Monarchs.
Really?
I'm like, how did?
Dude, that's how Ken Harvey, Ken Harvey played for the Monarchss too remember ken harvey he was an all-star yeah he hit him right
off his knee that one time oh yeah ken harvey was a man he was he was hilarious but yeah i'm just
like shocked and kind of saddened like yes it is sad he got pulled up to mlb in 2014 was on a world
series team and he was like supposed to be like the next big thing too really was he a hot prosp
and now he's on the monarchs and i'm gonna be cheering him on all season long that's insane yeah wow so that'd be fun i'm sure there'll be a lot of
content to come from i hope he just rakes and and what if tim tebow came to play for the monarchs
oh i'll tweet at him that would be fun to have him on the pod tim come on the pod tim and have
the flat earth guy at the same time i love a good debate uh-huh okay thank you for all the voice
memos appreciate it you guys brad you'd like to get into our reviews of the week yeah i'm on one
percent battery so i'm gonna be quick hot dog here take this it's a charger ah give it to me
thank you come on come on come on scoop Got it. And we're scooped. Where was mine?
You go ahead.
I got to find mine.
Not to sound angry, but best podcast ever.
You ready for that?
Nice.
Hey, Brad.
Hey, Jake.
It's Noah.
And I just wanted to write another review.
I don't know if you'll see this, but I had a question for you guys.
Episode 100 is coming up, and I wanted to know if you're doing anything cool during
the episode, because I would say that episode 100 is an achievement.
I have one more question.
Me and my friends are trying to find a way to make money, but we can't think of anything.
So I wanted to know, when you guys were teenagers, did you try to make money?
And if you did, what did you do?
Post script, do you guys have any ideas of what we can do to make money that would also be fun?
Whoa, post script means that usually you have something else.
Seems like the same thing.
Seems like more of the script.
That was from Hammy 2.5 congrats
on the username yeah yeah that's huge yeah good for him more hamstrings than i have okay so first
one is episode 100 we've talked about it i had two ideas and you said let's combine them we have
made no progress on either of those two ideas but yeah just cut that sound clip and that is our
podcast not really but we're we're
still trying to move studios it's been a frigid week and it's like we can't do it's just not fun
i mean but it's not any different than if it were 35 it's the exact same yeah i think we'd like we
have intentions to do something fun for episode we dun. If you want to do woodworking for me,
that would help me have a lot more time
to do podcast things.
Hand me 2.5.
Do you want to do some woodworking
in the next six weeks?
Anybody that wants to come,
help me sand,
help me spray some lacquer.
We're talking pre-catalyzed.
Really?
Yeah, oh yeah.
Oh.
Always.
That's good.
UV blocking,
so the sun can hit it,
no problem.
Blocked.
Blocked.
Blocked.
So, yeah. yeah yes we will do
something we'll figure it out yeah i'll stay up late i'll pass midnight i'll buy a house i don't
care i don't even care and then uh him and his friends are trying to make money i would say buy
and sell red red tigers what kind of what kind of money you think he's talking like i just thought
of something you think that guy meant red pandas because those are a thing but he said like a really small amount
like didn't he say $200
or $500 some they said 2000
I would have never done it for 2000 dude how come we
can't remember anything dude we're dumb maybe just
me I'm not a good listener
I'm just cold I'm not a good listener
to people's names and I do so
bad like I listen to what they say
but I think I'm too concerned with my handshake or something.
Sometimes I don't really listen to their name.
And then I like,
like I met people yesterday talking about a table and I could not remember
the man's name for the life of me.
I was like,
gosh,
I think it's Chris.
It was Mike.
I was wrong.
I'm glad.
I'm glad I didn't guess,
but I was asking trade today.
I was like,
Hey,
do you know when I can expect like my tax return stuff from your accountant?
What's your name? Irene. And he's like, Claudia, I was like, hey, do you know when I can expect like my tax return stuff from your accountant? What's her name?
Irene.
And he's like, Claudia.
I'm like, weirdly, those are like similar names.
Yeah.
It's like the same like demographic and time period and stuff.
Yeah.
I'm like, I wasn't even close, but in a way I think I was, I almost had it.
Like you feel like that was a seventies, like alt rock song, kind of like folky.
Like, yeah.
Oh, Claudia.
Claudia. Yeah. Irene. Come on, Irene. like alt rock song kind of like folky like yeah oh claudia claudia yeah irene come on irene
my taxes i need to file them you i don't know you please say that i was trying to think of what
else to say okay ways to make money buy and sell to think of what else to say. Okay. Ways to make money.
Buy and sell Red Tigers.
I would just say like pray on the goodness, P-R-E-Y, on the goodness of people and charge way too much money for a lemonade.
Have a lemonade stand, but charge $5 a cup.
Like you can make, yeah, no, one time you can make some money.
One time?
One time.
I think that's fine.
Yeah, yeah.
Just like.
I'm not saying start a lemonade business.
Maybe though.
Maybe.
People pay a lot of money for things that aren't that valuable these days, guys.
EllisCustomerCreators.com.
Here's what you do in March.
Once it starts to get a little warmer, you have a new business every Saturday just to
try it out.
So like one is lemonade stand.
One is like thrifting.
Like we're going to go to thrift store, buy some stuff, try to resell it on eBay that
week.
Okay.
The next Saturday is mowing lawns.
And then the Saturday after that, uh-oh, snowstorm came into town, shoveled driveways. Uh-oh. Yeah. buy some stuff try to resell it on ebay that week okay the next saturday is mowing lawns and then
the saturday after that uh-oh snowstorm came into town shoveled driveways oh yeah mowing lawns and
shoveling driveways back to back absolutely that happens all the time uh i think mowing lawns
actually is like the best business you can do as a young kid yeah like people willing to pay for it
equipment isn't that expensive get enough clients where then you can like hire other people to do
it for you now Now we're talking.
Oh, yeah.
There's some high school kids I know that are doing very well for themselves.
Mowing lawns.
Talk to Aunt Cindy.
I know she's got Pokemon cards somewhere in that house.
Try to get them from her.
They're super hot right now.
Are they?
It's Pokemon cards.
Yeah, they're huge.
Really?
Yeah, that's another thing.
It's just sports cards in general.
Playing cards?
No, not playing cards.
Trading cards?
Sporty cardies. Those are getting real big like right now
to
according to Gary V
What else could you do good day trade crypto currencies? I think I'd be fun if I was getting smart and yeah safe I
Think it'd be a blast you can mine them learn how to mine learn how to mine be a miner hand me 2.5
Figured out. Oh shoot. Where am I now I love the ambish. That's great, dude.
I'm going to go with
mine is K.S.
Schroeder, 2-7-21.
Oh, this podcast wins
the Super Bowl in my
heart.
Oh, my gosh.
This one's kind of out
of pity, it sounds like,
but it says, I've been
waiting for the right
time to leave a five-star
review, and tonight's
events have summoned me
here.
It must have been the
Super Bowl night.
I know many are
experiencing the painful
loss of the Chiefs to
the Bucs in Super Bowl
LV this Sunday evening.
Lord beer of strength. Vibes are at
an all-time low. Getting on your feet has never seemed
more difficult. Chick-fil-A isn't even open right now
to help you cope. But guess what?
Tomorrow's Monday and Monday means
new Ghostrunners. And new Ghostrunners means
hilarious bits and inside jokes with Jake
and Brad that always complete the pass.
That always run it to the end zone. Complete the pass.
That always make the tackle, always.
I've listened long enough to know that this team
can't be defeated, and if a Super Bowl podcast
existed, well, I'd bet money
on them winning every single time.
That's nice.
We need to cut that audio
clip and just say, you know, that part that says,
guess what? Tomorrow's Monday. Monday
means new Ghost Runners, blah, blah, blah.
And just put it in every single single day. And guess what? I'll be your Monday means new Ghost Runners, blah, blah, blah. And just put it in every single Sunday.
And guess what?
I'll be your daddy.
If you haven't been your daddy.
So, yeah, thank you, guys.
It's been fun.
It's always fun to record with you, Jacob.
Yes.
And I get to say something that I haven't said in a long time.
Maybe ever.
Coldest day of your life.
Jake, would you like to end this episode with a jingle?
Oh, Heatherly is back with another one.
Gonna need a little help from Brad, but this one's a little Jake heavy.
Clear the throat real quick.
I tried to go over the lyrics while I was driving here.
Always good in the snow.
And yeah, it was snowing.
It's just so cold.
Heatherly does a great job.
You can count on Heatherly giving you some good syllables, good rhymes.
Yep.
We're in good shape.
Here we go.
Let's do it.
Oh, a little antic magnet.
Yo, Big Daddy.
Let's kick it.
All right, stop. Nope, not yet, not yet
Ah, this vibes, baby, yeah
All right, stop
Ghosties come listen
Jake is back with the raps you've been missing
Something
Walks in my room nightly
Moon paints my beard
Clutch my laptop tightly
What's in the room, McRae?
Yo, I hope so
Keep my door shut, yeah Now I know the morning, sound asleep like a boulder.
Drive to McLean's, the walk is long and it's colder. Donuts. Chocolate icing, please, too.
Meeting with Brad, face-to-face, I don't zoom. Yucky. When I drink a cold sweet tea,
ladies think less than just drinks. It's sympathy. Love us or like us. You better go rate. You better
hit subscribe. Ghost Run is on base. If you got a problem, ghosty solve it, check out this hook while Big Daddy resolves it
Vibes, vibes baby Ghostrunner, vibes, vibes baby
Ghostrunner, vibes, vibes baby Ghostrunner, vibe, vibe baby
Now that the basement is jumpin'
Got the music turned up and the weights are pumpin'
Quick 40 on, 20 off, no joke
Crushin' pushups like they're cans of coke
Look at Isaac, he's quick and nimble
Refused to build the consensual kennel
Harrison, yoga mat, still a no-show
It's the pot time, time to go solo rollin'
And my old Toyota, windows down and I'm blarin' gaga
Workers in the drive-thru, jokes just for you Get a laugh? No, they're not amused Time to go solo, rollin' in my old Toyota Windows down and I'm blaring Gaga
Workers in the drive-thru, jokes just for you
Get a laugh?
No, they're not amused
Kept on, trying to the next stop
Driving slow and I'm headed to the next block
The block was dead, yo, so I continued to
Chick-fil-A?
The next avenue Chicken was hot, taking off the wrapper
Saw Mr. James, he was looking dapper
Famous, the best place to dine
Cars for days and Mr. James moves the line
Ready for my poultry of the week
My poultry makes me sick cause my poultry is beef
Intro started off with a song
I grab my mic and dance along
Laughing cause we go all out
Write a review, you might get a shout
Memo on memo, the anchor app's packed
I'm trying to hear him so we can all react
Boys on the scene, you know what I mean
Down boys are back like everyone was hoping If there was a problem ghost for to solve it checked
99% of the way
That was great girl son is my baby
Shake you gone. Go surround vibes, vibes, baby.
I think it's over, isn't it?
Yeah.
Uh.
No lyrics.
I'm going wild.
No Heather Lee.
It's a freestyle.
Uh.
Jacob Brad.
Jacob Brad.
Hey.
Put it on your face.
Make it glad to see you all night.
Tossing and turning.
Cause I couldn't wait for Monday morning.
Oh, yeah. On the podcast.
Isaac's hurt.
Cause he's got a bad back
Oh yeah, and never ever quit
In two days, flyin' to Phoenix
Mm, gon' beat em all
Goin' to the tournament, play pickleball
Oh, gonna feel real nice
Give a big high five, sunny on 75
Then I come back, be real bold
Shovel the snow, cause it got cold
I miss the
Ghostrunners vibes you good man
god that was nice spit it out now ghost runners vibes vibes baby ghost runners vibes baby
ghost runners vibes baby how's your mom hey how's your mom prank huh hey do this one when we're at pilates
oh I did a Zumba with your mom in this song.
Do you know what I mean?
Heatherly, thanks.
Thanks for writing me a song.
Oh, my tongue got twisted a few times.
That was good.
That was great.
That was really fun.
What a rush.
There is another jingle.
It says Jake's rap number two.
Comment below if you want it oh
yeah five star review is there a rap in that song i was just thinking definitely not as i was reading
i was like that's more of a song that just is a rapping kind of poppy song we're gonna tell you
what it is though guys come back next time yep cool that might be mine actually. That's probably yours. Yeah. That's probably yours.
So Heatherly, you got, you got work to do or anybody else, anyone else, but we love you
Heatherly for doing these. Write me a rap mama. Uh, Brad, any final thoughts? Oh, I had thoughts.
Shoot. Oh, I had thoughts. I was talking to Steven Swick today. This is kind of a serious thing.
Good. Um, I like to end it this way. He's an attorney. And so he was like, he, he's misspelled your one time. And I was like, he's like, gosh, I'm such an
idiot. And I was like, dude, you're not an idiot. You're an attorney. It's like empirical facts
that you're smart. He's like, actually, I don't think it's that hard to like, I don't think,
what did he say? Like, I don't think you have to be that smart to go to law school. I think
you just have to be really determined and really driven. I think that's just life. I think, I think obviously there's, there's people that are
naturally more gifted than others in certain areas, but at the end of the day, it's just
about how much you want to actually do something or not. Like, I don't think it's, I don't think
it's can't, I think it's, you don't want that you want to that bad. Yeah. Like, I don't think
like, like I don't really want to be an engineer, but if I, if I, if I want to be an engineer, I believe I could be an engineer.
I don't, you know, whatever.
I think there's physical limitations.
Like, I don't think I can be a professional basketball player.
Yeah.
But I think I can do most things and I think you can too.
So if you want to do something, do it.
And if you're saying you can't do it, it's probably just because you don't want to.
So there's a slap in the face.
If you, I'm just being real, just being real and just saying, go for it.
If you want to do it or look in the mirror of why you're not getting there, if you can't
slap yourself in the face, cause Brad can't reach you.
And I won't, I won't slap people.
He's not going to reach you.
No, no.
I always say, believe this.
I think, yeah, if you're out there, you are looking into what you might want to do.
Know that you can do all of them.
It's just a matter of choosing.
Yeah.
For the record, like I used to always think like, Oh, I don't have that kind of mind,
like literally about things like what I'm doing as a living. Now I used to be like,
there's no way, like one of my friends one time at camp, like he like took some zip ties and like
tied up a fan to like hang down and like, like, like shoot like air down on my feet. And I was
like, that's so cool, man, that you figure that out. Like, I just don't have an engineer mind. Like, and it's like, that sounds so simple now.
And like, I just had to, like, I was just so lazy and I was like, I'm not going to think that way
to figure that out. And it's like, then I finally was like, Hey, maybe I should try to figure this
out. And now it's like, it's not that hard. You just have to try. So I think about it all the
time, somewhat in a place of like self, like, I i don't know consciousness of just like almost like
a lack of confidence because like man i don't feel like i was the funniest one of my friends
in high school i wasn't even close to being one of the funniest ones in my friend group in college
yeah i i just think there's so many funnier people out there but i'm the friend that they
know doing this i'm the friend doing comedy like this is crazy because you went for it you're going
for it yeah that's that's half the battle is just like trying like just go for it like you you're you're you posted something you you try like other people are like
i don't want to fail or i don't want to try this too too hard yeah so i'll say 100 agree try i
think about it all the time yeah so anyway buy that house that you can't afford get that tiger
buy that house just that's pressure makes diamonds so just buy that $800,000 house you can't afford
and you'll make enough money to work there.
And never sell GameStop.
It's fun to be a part of a movement like that.
Never sell it.
Lose as much money as you put in.
We watch the big shorts, so we understand.
I understand it.
Short it.
CDOs.
CDOs and Ryan Gosling.
He's a pretty cool guy.
To the moon, baby.
Love you guys.
You guys are fun.
Let me shout out quick.
Yeah.
Hattie Louise Ellis ellis oh she's
nice bradley ellis yeah catherine hansen ellis only cat allowed in the house you guys are my
favorite people in the world that's all rock on how's your mom how's your mom rock on Every morning we're taking back Us from the spot, yeah