Giggly Squad - Giggling about breakups, broad shoulders, and trampolines
Episode Date: August 20, 2024Hannah is having an identity crisis and Paige is horrified by the idea of fart walksget a signed copy of our book hereget tickets to our live shows here (Radio City just announced - presale code: GIGG...LY)sign up for our newsletter here Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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Gary fix your wifi. Manifest that shit. We can't be managed.
I mean the day just got away from me.
Hello my demure gigglers. No, you know what's so funny is that like now trends last a day.
No, it's kind of sad because some shit is really good and you're like this should have lasted a year and then some
stuff is so stupid and you're like
No, everything's pretty good. All the trades are pretty good
No, it's just it's just crazy. Like now I feel
You know, it's really nuts that happened to me the other day. I
Described someone as being millennial. I was like, they're just so
You've turned on your own
The call is coming from inside the house
Literally, I've had seven Gen Z gigglers being like you don't give millennial and all this other name like, you know
We think we're like, you know, I'm like we should be checked into a facility because that's not okay. I identify as Gen Z, and I came for the Gen Zs yesterday
on Instagram, did you see?
Well, no, what did you do?
I had a wild post on Instagram yesterday.
So I've been trying to be quiet and demure on Instagram
since Netflix special, because I was like, let's calm down.
Like you've been in everyone's face promoting
I'm like let's try to be more page like just disappear. No I haven't posted and then last
night I was posting about shout out Radio City. No shout out. The New York I love how we've changed
subjects 80 times in one sentence. We're having really bad ADHD today. The New York gigglers were like, hey, how y'all doing?
Why don't you have a show for us yet?
And I'm like, girls, how dare you think
that we forgot about you?
We're dealing with some admin.
It's actually so hard to get a New York City venue.
You have to book it 42 months in advance.
No, people talk about trying to book something
for their wedding.
This is harder. Literally, I'm like, this is why I can't get married. I have a trying to book something for their wedding. This is harder.
Literally, I'm like, this is why I can't get married.
I have a tour to book.
No, and everything's always booked,
so you have to fight with other people to book whatever.
Anyway, long story short, Radio City is on sale,
pre-sale, code giggly, it's in January,
let's fucking go, it's gonna be insane.
I think we need to get it. No, I'm so excited.
I literally feel like a Rockette.
Should we get the Rockettes to come?
I mean, if they're not busy,
they might be having an off night.
True. They're also, yeah.
They're like women in STEM.
They're very busy and flexible.
I'd like a documentary on them next.
Oh, that's actually so good.
That's so true it's it's basically
northern Dallas cowboy cheerleaders. Yeah it's the Northeast version and I feel
like it would be kind of crazy because also I always wondered did the Rockats
beef with the ballerinas like that's what I want to know. Also not to make
it negative but apparently all their bodies have to be the same.
Which, how the fuck do you even do that?
Like they have to be the same height and like.
And they all have to be, yeah.
And then like their legs probably have to be the same length.
Do you know the only reason I can't be a rock head
is because I have a long torso?
They're like, that torso ratio is fucked up,
get out of here.
I also can't touch my toes. No, I was just gonna say you're literally
the least flexible person I've ever met.
They're Gumby on that stage.
I can't even touch my shin.
No, that's kind of crazy.
Have you always been like that?
Yeah, and my brother could palm the floor
without stretching.
I can't. Yeah. Men being flexible is like not.
Okay.
No, it's definite.
I feel like we've spoken about this.
Like who is the guy that did the splits?
And I just.
Wait, that was Ariana's boyfriend.
Yeah.
I want them to like literally have to go to the chiropractor because they're so
un-flexible.
So anyway, I'm posting about Radio City
and I go to the fonts and like, not to brag,
because I feel like I was a little late to it.
I got the new Instagram fonts, which no one wants.
No one wants an update.
Wait a minute.
Everyone's like, I want the update
and then you get it and everyone freaks out.
And I know there's real issues going on in the world,
but I projected them all into the fact that
there's no Instagram font that I feel like fits me.
Why can I not tell if I have the new ones or not?
Oh yeah, I think I do.
Do all of them seem insane?
Do all of them seem like someone took ecstasy and was like...
Not, I don't know if, I can't tell if I have the update
or not.
Honestly, you were too focused on outfits,
you don't care about font.
I'm very fixated on font.
Because the font affects how people read what you say.
So true. So like there's one that I, the kind of thin people read what you say. So true.
So like there's one that I,
the kind of thin that I think is creepy
and if you say something like cute outfit today,
it reads as like, cute outfit today.
Yes.
No, anything that looks like crayons, I'm like.
That's for children.
Yeah, I'm like, that's a little creepy.
And then they have a full script one.
So then I was like, Gen Z legit can't read script and I didn't the Gen Z's got
actually Grace commented that's how you know. She was offended? She's offended I
said Gen Z's can't read script which they can't that's just a fact I thought
that was a fact. Yeah they don't they didn't learn it they didn't have like a
writing class yeah they didn't have like cursive class. Yeah, they didn't have like cursive class.
So anyway, then there's like the true crime one,
which is like the typewriter font,
which looks like about to announce a murder.
Yeah, it's very millennial.
Everyone stay safe.
Literally, I've been foaming at the mouth all week
and I've been bringing it, no,
I've been trying to bring it up to anyone
You know, it's crazy. It's not really on my algorithm if you don't know what we're talking about Molly May and Tom Fury broke up and
Here's why it was so significant to me. Oh my god. Can I stop getting emails? Here's why it was so significant to me
I love what you're like. This is why it's about me
Here's why it was so significant to me. When I love you, you're like, this is why it's about me.
That season of Love Island saved our lives.
Explain.
When that, when me and Hannah really first started
getting into Love Island,
we were filming Summer House Season Five,
which was the end COVID season.
The beginning of the end which
was probably the scariest summer of our lives no it was an insane asylum like I
actually like called my mom at one point was like I think we're all having
nervous breakdowns like I want to pull my hair out I don't know what that means
I quit but anyway that season of Love Island like saved our lives because we sat there
and watched the full season in like three days.
It was actually so weird and should be,
it was so meta because when we were not filming Summer House,
we would go in our bed and just binge Love Island
to pretend we weren't filming Summer House
and they'd be like, you have to go to the kitchen.
I was like, I don't wanna fight with someone right now.
I'm trying to see Molly Mae and Tommy make out with a hot tub.
Yeah, I'm like Molly Mae just walked in
with red lipstick on.
What do you want me to do?
So did you know Molly Mae before Love Island?
I didn't, but she was famous already in the UK.
She was already an influencer,
but I didn't know anything about anyone famous in the UK until I really got deep
into Love Island.
But right when she appeared on the screen,
you know how people just have, you can't teach it,
it's just this energy where you're like,
I'm obsessed with them.
And she also was kind.
I feel like she was nice.
So sweet, she was so sweet and she was so pretty
and she was just cute and you like wanted to be her friend.
Cause it's easy to villainize the new girl
that comes on being like, who wants to be with me?
All you girls don't know what's coming.
Wait, Hannah, can we make a show that's like,
like a sitcom about like Love Island Island but it's like we hire actors
but like people watching think it's like real people and we're like your accent's
like not good enough like wait would that be such a funny show like we're the
producers and we're like cut cut like you need to have a thicker accent
okay put that on the docket.
Wait, before you even give your hot take
that you've been like foaming at the mouth to give,
can I give a hot take?
Yeah. This is the least surprising
breakup I've ever heard.
I feel nothing.
That's so insensitive
of you. I'm...
What made you think this was gonna work out?
Because he's so dumb
that like I literally thought I was like he can't even get across the street
without her. Like where's he going? That's the thing she deserves better. When I
first heard it I was dare I say gutted for her because I was like because the
way it happened I was like oh she found out some shit and was like nope
I'm putting it on Instagram to like make you know, I'm serious
We're done. And so like every girl
I feel like has felt that deep pit in their stomach where something happens and you're like and now I have to throw up like
I'm you think she posted it before he posted anything to be like don't try to fucking get me back like
it's in the public now like you're fucking done yeah that's powerful serious I am I like
that so I was like very proud of her in that but when then when I was thinking about it
he's weird like he didn't want their kid to go to school like he's weird she deserves
someone so much cooler and so I'm actually so happy that
they're broken up and I'm not saying he's bad because I don't know him but
again like the way he looks you just know he's been treated differently he
has those like wide-ass shoulders like people immediately are like you're good
like you know we need to bring more awareness to men than of wide-ass
shoulders and don't trust them don Don't trust a wide shoulder man.
If they have a broad shoulder, keep an eye out for them.
I feel like men with broad shoulders don't know how to eat you out.
I feel like a guy with narrow shoulders, he's going down there.
He's putting his little narrow shoulders up inside your pussy.
Okay, small, very small tidbitbit that you gotta look out for.
When someone's going down on you,
if their whole body isn't on the bed, I'm not into it.
You're saying if he looks like he's gonna receive doggy.
Yes, I have to remove myself from the situation.
Wow, we just went from zero to 100 so quick.
Wait, will you say anything to him?
Will you be like, hey, can you like?
I try and move so that he has to move
because I'm like, I can't look at you.
Are you like, do you want more room?
See, I have a long torso,
so I don't know if any guy has enough room
to lay down fully.
My torso hits the end of the bed.
He's on the floor.
You have to be backed up.
The last thing I'm gonna say about Tommy,
Fury, and Molly Mae, they're 25.
They have a whole life to live.
She could get engaged again and divorce
before she even meets her soulmate.
They're like fine
What's with reality shows being obsessed with?
people getting engaged
obsessed obsessed and it's like that is above your pay grade like
That's when paperwork gets involved. No if there's admin involved. I'm like, maybe we should take a second look like
No, if there's admin involved I'm like maybe we should take a second look like
Like I have to get someone appointed by the court also
They treat it like a storyline where like if these people get engaged or married It's like a bow and like then they're in touch untouchable and like everything's perfect and I'm like, this is the beginning of a nightmare
the beginning of a horror film
and I'm like, this is the beginning of a nightmare. The beginning of a horror film.
And to the end also, like,
cause Love Island and some of the other ones,
like they're getting people and they're fucking young.
They're signing on to do a reality show
because they're young and they're like experiencing things
and they don't really know.
And so like to expect them to get engaged
and stay together forever, it's like-
Brainwashed at the end, like, you know,
have you ever watched Bachelor in Paradise?
No, that's the thing that's crazy.
Like with all the Love Island people coming out
and being like, the internet is crazy
and the edits are crazy.
It's like, yeah.
I do have to say something,
and I wasn't gonna lean into this,
but there's a crazy Chicks in the Office interview with Leah
where it's the first interview out of the house,
and they're basically like Queen Leah,
and she was like, what do you mean?
And they're like, you're the star,
and she's like, what do you mean?
And it was like a perfect example of like,
when you're filming, you cannot tell that someone is like,
such a hero versus, like it's way more,
and everyone's saying shit that you're like, ooh oh that could be bad. Oh, that could be bad
Oh, I don't love that and she was like what and they're like, why are you shocked and she's like
What are you talking about?
Because the producers were also probably like if people are gonna not like you if you like say this
I also think back to the marriage thing like
Bachelor in Paradise at the end they have to decide if they want to leave the
island with the person and there's always one couple that succumbs to the
pressure of them being like you guys everyone loves you if you propose right
now you're gonna be the biggest couple in America and they're just like fuck it
let's go and then they're oh that's's so scary No, I know because also I feel like getting engaged
Look obviously things happen and people get divorced but like getting engaged. I don't want to feel it too many times
Okay, don't come for JLo like that
This again, okay, it was hard enough. I don't come for her like that. No I don't want to be like this again. Okay. JLo's had it hard enough you don't have to come for her like that. Is JLo with Ben? I think the first time to be the only time. Has anyone
checked on them? I don't believe so. I don't believe so at all. I will say we
haven't like touched on any of the Blake Lively stuff because I just feel like
it's so overdone. It's so like okay we get it everyone hates everyone everyone sucks like here's the thing if you would
listen to Giggly Squad from the beginning we would have told you this
like look at this kitty like Daphne is joined Daphne's looking at me yes it's
your godmother Daphne it's your godmother I think about you every day
Daphne like the media will never let. I think about you every day, Daphne. Like the media will never let a woman
be too on top for too long.
But I will say, I started watching Jane the Virgin
because I didn't know who Justin Baldoni was
until all of this.
Yeah, I don't know who he was.
I didn't know how everyone knew who he was.
Yeah.
I'm obsessed with Jane the Virgin now.
Oh, that's one of those shows that everyone loved
that I didn't get into.
Me neither.
Because we're sluts.
I was like, none of this could be for me.
Someone said that I looked like
Ray Gunn, the break dancer, yesterday.
Stop.
The Australian?
Yeah, that really made me laugh. For a good three minutes I was like, that's hilarious.
We didn't talk about Ray Gunn.
We didn't. We didn't talk about the break dancing of it all.
I do support women in the arts.
Here's the thing. We do support women in the arts, but we're not blind.
And we have brains on us. So we're not just blindly supporting all women in the arts because
some of them are insane. So apparently she like studies the culture of break dancing.
I think she like is obsessed with it. Well I saw all these people saying that like she stopped
other people from being able to go to the Olympics who were like way more qualified.
And here's the other thing,
when I was watching the break dancing,
I was like, I've seen better break dancing on the subway.
Like, I was like, I live in New York City,
which I would think is the capital
of the break dancing world.
I'm like, at any given moment,
I could go on the corner and see seven people
better than you.
Like this is wild.
Easily, and we would still like not be impressed.
Yeah, no literally.
Have you ever gone to Times Square once in your life?
Elmo can break it the fuck down.
They're doing insane things and they're like,
they're tying themselves up and break dancing
and getting out of like a belted situation.
My thing is like, I wanna know what the qualifications
to like get a sport into the Olympics are.
I think that's the thing, it was definitely hard
and I think they took it away after that.
Like it got so much bad press.
But if break dancing was getting that much,
that many like eyes on it to be like,
oh, maybe this should be an Olympic sport.
I feel like, have you ever watched any dance team on TikTok?
Oh my god it's incredible. Why would dance teams not be an Olympic sport? Like those people are
insane. I literally fall asleep to like world dance team tournaments. Yeah who's making these
decisions? I think it is the country like us if we were in office.
So like I just think it's the country.
You know like it's not us.
I'm calling it.
I think pickleball is the next Olympic sport.
Yeah or like handball.
Which I everyone's been asking Hannah what do you think about pickleball?
I support it but I haven't played it yet because I'm really afraid that I'm gonna get the bug and then I'm a want to go
Pro and I'm gonna quit all my jobs and then just like be on tour as a pickleball crazy professional
It's literally why you've never tried cocaine
It's the same reason on why you've never tried cocaine. You get me
You would get obsessed with that. You'd have to be the best
Drug addict for a friend.
Wait, I'm so scared of myself.
I'm so scared.
Here's the thing, here's the thing with pickleball,
you would be so fucking good.
It would actually be frightening.
No, I know.
And like you would, that's why you you haven't tried
it you don't want to beat out everyone else you're actually extremely humble.
And then I have my cute friends who were like hey do you want to play pickleball
with me this Sunday and I go do you want to have a massacre? Do you want to have a
bloody massacre in your sweet country club? Can I just say? I don't have mercy.
It's not in my gut.
I went to see Hannah on a non-giggly squad day,
like a real friend day,
and there was a moment where I was like,
we would have been such good friends as little girls.
Oh, you made me cry.
There was a moment where Hannah goes,
do you want to watch me play tennis?
And I was like okay and she literally ran put her sneakers on and I grabbed my
blankie like sit on the chair to watch her play tennis and I was like in my head I was
like oh my god we would have vied so hard as little girls because I wanted to like sit and like
play with something and you would have been like doing something active but we
would have still like been together and vibing on our own. I'm that kid who's
like you want to see me do this flip and then I just like trip on myself and
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Also people are mad at me because I made hot dog pasta the other day. And I'm one of those people I think. Look some nights
are hard. Some nights are harder than others. Nana's somewhere. Nana's upset. Well Rayos sent me a bunch of pasta. I saw that huge
box in your foyer. In my foyer, not to brag. So I was like,, do you want a home cooked meal tonight? Do you?
Do you?
This is also how you get out of home cooked meals,
make them hot dog pasta.
And they'll never ask you to cook.
So were you just having like a side hot dog
and you're like, what if I just?
I'm gonna be honest, I've done this many times before.
It's kind of like, it's like sausage.
It's a little salty, I have to say for the pasta it's also disgusting
there's something I like hot dogs I like pasta it's a protein is there even
protein in hot dogs your Nana is probably beside she comments on all my
stuff the silence was deafening on that. I think she actually, she was like,
I'm not processing this.
She was like, I've been alive for too long.
I shouldn't have seen this.
I wasn't ready.
But I also just love seeing people's reactions.
Also, do you know that hot girl walks are over?
Stop. Well, they've been replaced.
With what?
Fart walks.
No.
Yes.
No.
Yes.
The PR.
PR?
The farting PR, the IBS PR is doing well.
No.
What?
Why?
Because it's like good for your digestive system?
Yeah, so basically after you eat, you go for a walk and just like let it fly.
So it's not only polite to your guests because you're outside.
That's insane because after I eat I have to lay down.
Apparently it's good for your digestion.
Okay, so what do you do when you're doing that with your boyfriend?
That's disgusting. That's called intimacy page.
No, I've never farted in front of a boyfriend ever.
And I really don't see myself ever doing it.
You've never accidentally laughed too hard
and it came out? Never.
Maybe once.
And do you own it or do you like,
were you like, that was the chair?
No.
Because that was the chair.
I would never.
I honestly wouldn't, I don't even know.
That's probably definitely happened,
but I probably blacked it out because I know I've never like,
like maybe he caught on, but I never said anything.
Like no, I've never.
And you have that quick decision you have to make
of if you go oops, or if you go never,
you don't address it or if you blame something.
So split second decision you have to make.
It's game time decision.
I hate that we're talking about this
because I feel like now it's gonna happen to me.
Oh no, I didn't mean to manifest that for you.
No, you did this to me.
I do have to say, we talk about our bodies
and all this stuff, but people don't talk about
the farting and pooping enough,
and Nana hates when I talk about it,
but do you ever have such good of a poop
you wanna tell someone?
Never, never.
That's crazy, because this morning I almost texted you
and I was like, has your soul ever left your body?
Then you almost feel like you wanna congratulate yourself.
You're like, that was good.
Here's the thing I will say,
after being away for a weekend,
or being away on a trip,
when I come home I think because
I'm such an anxious person like physically my body really does like hold
on to so much so like even if I didn't have to go to the bathroom when I'm
like pulling up in the uber to my apartment I feel like my body's like
we're home like thank God we've been literally holding everything in
for 13 days, we didn't know if we were ever coming back.
Like the inside of my body is so dramatic.
I'm like, guys, calm the fuck down, we're gonna come home.
But like subconsciously I'm like, are we ever going home?
No, it's like when you're about to go home with a guy
to like hook up the first time,
that's how I feel when it's been like a long night out and you're about to poop
You're like we're about to get back. It's about to get crazy. I haven't felt that sensation in
years
Years I like thinking about how I used to like run to a starbucks across the street because I like
Refused to go to the bathroom at like a guy's house. Yeah
I was like obsessed with my breath.
I had bad breath phobia where I was like,
the whole time I'd be like, you can't kiss me right now,
I just ate this, or you can't kiss me right now,
I'm a little bit thirsty.
And then it's weird to put gum in your mouth,
like a fucking second grader.
See, mine would be like, we just smoked a cig at the club.
We can't make out.
Me, I'm like, I just had chicken parmesan. I think there was garlic in that. So I would be like we just smoked a cig at the club. We can't make out. Me, I'm like, I just had chicken parmesan.
I think there was garlic in that.
So I would be obsessed.
I wouldn't kiss a guy if I wasn't 100% sure.
We're like, I feel like I put too much weight on that.
No.
I was obsessed with the fact he might be like,
no, I don't like her breath.
Yeah.
No, there's different things that now I don't like her breath. Yeah, no, there's like different things that like now I don't even like think about.
I feel like.
No, you're like I should consider that every now and then.
No, I do always think about like,
okay, if I was single right now, I'd be the worst.
I'd be like, I don't care about you.
Like I'll do this on my own, goodbye.
I would be just so different than what I was used to being.
You mean changing everything for a man?
Literally changing everything and going clubbing.
I don't think I would club again.
No.
That would be so scary.
Clubbing's violence.
No, it incites violence, it truly does.
It does.
Speaking of violence, I had a crazy purchase the other day.
And I briefly talked about it on burner phone,
but I want your perspective.
I bought a trampoline.
Have you seen these videos of these girls
jumping up and down on a trampoline,
being like, it's so good.
Like a personal size.
Yeah, it's like a little one.
They're like, it's so good for your lymphatic drainage,
which I still don't know if it's real.
And they're like, it just helps with your digestion.
It's a great workout.
And I'll-
Is it a great workout?
I'll do anything to not jog.
Like anything besides jogging, I'm like, sign me up.
I do some research.
They call it rebounding.
So it's not like jumping on a trampoline
It's called rebounding and cool girls in New York City are doing it. There's like a place called Ness Ness
We're like cool girls
Bop on trampolines which
So I bought it this feels very
1950s and I'm like almost kind of here for it
I know and Des is like what the fuck is your trampoline outside and I was like it's my workout. So I did it for
like four seconds and immediately I had to shit myself. No way! It's like taking a
baby and shaking a baby. So I want to get into it but I just haven't been in the right digestion place.
It's like shaking a fucking Diet Coke and being like, oh no.
Waiting for you to get into the right digestion place though, could take years.
No, it can be literally the next like mercury needs to be retrograde.
So I'm, but I just want to let people know
rebounding is a thing.
I haven't been able to do it yet,
but I'll keep people posted on my rebounds.
I hope I get this in my algorithm now
because I've never even, I've never even thought about it.
I just also hope that like people don't hurt themselves
cause it's not a big one.
You're just like jumping and they're like, raise your leg, raise your leg, turn, raise your leg.
So I'm gonna try it.
Okay.
But I also could have just wasted $400.
$400 Hannah for a personal triple lead?
Well I had to make sure it wasn't gonna break.
It was like $350 on Amazon.
Oh my God, literally in my head I was like, oh it's like a my god, I'm literally in my head,
I was like, oh, it's like a hundred bucks,
she got it on like TikTok.
I don't know if it's, maybe it's 350.
I'll put it in the newsletter.
My thing is I will buy stuff
that I think will make me a better person
and not use it and think that there's some kind of
like trickle down effect.
Like I'll buy like mental health books and not read it,
but be like, but I have these books, so I'm better.
I literally just did that and I bought a prayer journal.
I was like, I need to like, pray.
Are you becoming a born again?
What the fuck is going on over there?
Well, Des is making fun of me because in our house,
I have a book that just says how to set boundaries.
And he's like, this is in the middle of our house.
I'm like, oh my God, people need to work on their boundaries.
He's like, can you not put your weird self-help books
in the middle of the living room?
Wait, that's actually like a really funny, quirky thing
that I think more people should do,
just have like the weirdest book titles,
like in their home.
What a conversation starter.
Like imagine having like,
imagine coming home to your husband
and just putting a book in the bookshelf
that said divorce for dummies.
Like you know what I mean?
How did I get there?
It's hilarious.
My favorite though is like the millennial book trend
that everyone had to put like fuck in the title.
It's like how to be a fucking girl boss.
Fuck you, bitch.
No, okay, well actually that's funny that you bring that up
because I have two like big bookshelves in my bedroom
and I've been trying to like decorate them.
And I was like, wait, is I want like,
I want a like row of books,
but I want them to be all the same color.
So like, I don't give a shit what the books are, but they them to be all the same color. So like, I don't give a shit what the books are,
but they need to be all the same color.
So one side I have, they're like all blue,
and on the other side, they're all white.
And so they came in and I like put them up,
and then I was like, is this so fucking millennial?
I was like, is this so millennial and weird?
I need to take a picture and put it in the newsletter
because I don't know if it looks cool
or if it looks horrible.
Did you run it by Grace?
I didn't, I was too scared.
I think that's your answer.
If you're too scared to ask Grace, it's millennial.
I do think- No, that's true.
Like a stereotypical coffee table book could be millennial.
Like too thick of one.
Yeah.
Fuck.
I do think our Giggly Squad book is a perfect one though.
No, it is perfect because it is so freaking cute.
Imagine if we had a handbook for like Giggly Squad employees
and one of the things was like,
and if you have to ask Grace, it's a no. Oh God.
I want to talk personal style for a second.
Okay.
I think I know how I want to describe my style.
In three words.
Actually it is three words,
but you're just found an aesthetic on TikTok.
Okay.
Tomboyfemberlain.
That's what I wanna be for fall.
Okay.
Okay, you're gonna need a trench coat.
I need, this is the thing though,
I don't wear sambas.
You don't have to wear sambas.
Are sambas for people with flat feet?
Cause I just feel like they're not,
why would I wear a samba when I could wear
something more comfortable?
They're so flat to me.
Like they're, it's like, they're like a fucking ballet flat.
I have like pink and blue, like platform sambas
that are like cute.
Are they comfortable?
I think so.
You don't even process comfortability
when it comes to fashion.
You don't even know. When it comes comes to fashion. You don't even know.
When it comes to a shoe, I don't know.
The second I put it on, I'm like, could I run in this?
No.
I'm like, could I jog the track?
I should.
Should I go on a-
I should think of that more often
because we do live in New York City
and it's like, I probably should run more times
like when someone's chasing me.
should run more times like when someone's chasing me but if something is uncomfortable but it looks really good I'll suck it up yeah but I don't like to
be uncomfortable yeah but like if I have to be for a specific event I will be
have you thought of your three words to describe your style?
I feel like you've been waiting for someone to ask you that.
Like my whole life.
I actually don't know what would describe my style.
I would say I'm a little bit of a juxtaposition
because I would say that I do like a very classic look but
also I love a fucking trend. You do and I do have something to say about trends
someone had a good quote about like you can't just keep buying trends whenever
they come out like capitalism can't keep winning like that it's more like use the
trend to influence your personal style.
Just take from the trend what is good with your style.
Well, a lot of times when I do Amazon Lives
and we talk about trends,
because I do think it's fun to try them,
a lot of the trends you already have in your closet
that you could like, okay, so one of the trends for fall is like,
like obviously big fall coats and like statement coats,
like voluminous, like big sleeved coats, but also shawls.
So like wrapping your own scarf, like in a different way
where it looks like it's like wrapped in the front
and like the ends are in the back.
And you don't have to go out and buy a coat
that's like has a built in shawl.
Like you can do it at home and like there
you've like done the trend one time
and you didn't buy a whole new coat with a shawl.
We just saved like $150.
No, literally.
Girl mat.
It's like a lot of trends like I feel like
people do have at home.
Like, and also like now it's like a de ox blood is more in style what actual red ox blood color is that they chose to call it
Jesus Christ
Peter somewhere being like I'm sorry
Peter's like we just stopped fighting with Pete Davidson now. We have to come for the whole fashion community
Ox blood it's chose violence oh my god but it's like a deeper red but like you can still wear
the red cardigan that you got last fall and like still be achieving the same
look are you going to go through your clothes and like donate a shit ton it's
so funny Hannah because that's on my to-do list I love a list I we should
talk about our list more often I have like a master's list it's on my to-do list I love a list I we should talk
about our list more often I have like a master's list it's called my long to-do
list master's that's so my master's to-do list those are like my long to-do
list things like that I could I'd like to get done within the year okay okay
then I have my everyday to-do list currently on my everyday to-do list. Currently, on my everyday to-do list,
to clean out my closet is tomorrow night.
Wow.
But it's always getting pushed.
Actually, my life is run by a note
that says shit I need to do,
and the top is things I should do that day,
and then I have ones at the bottom of other things.
It's funny, I wrote OBGYN.
When is the next time, I mean, you go to the-
No, I have to go to the dentist.
That is on my fricking list.
I need to go. I have a dentist girl.
No, I have a dentist.
Oh, sorry.
It's just hard going.
Do you guys know that we like barely have health insurance?
Hannah, we have health insurance.
I know, but it's not good.
It's not good in these streets. No, when anyone brings have health insurance. I know, but it's not good. It's not good in these
streets. No, when anyone brings up health insurance, I immediately retreat to it,
baby. I'm like, I don't know. Isn't it crazy, like, reality TV and comedians have no
health insurance. Should we start a union? Health insurance for the girlies.
You just have to be a girly. After you turn 26 people like are hitting you with all these like really weird words you're like I have no idea I just want to know that if I have to go to the
ER I'm gonna be okay. Oh my god I had to freak out I remember I was 26 in an office because they're
basically like you don't have to worry about it if you're under 26. But it's like, give me a little prep to know what's coming.
Because then they put a book in front of you
with all these words, and no one gives you
the definition of the words.
And they're just like, okay.
I've never seen this alleged book.
I think it's because you, at 26,
were already doing reality TV.
Hannah and I are traveling all the time.
I was just in Italy for two weeks and now we're about to go on tour for a few months.
We got an Airbnb for Hannah's wedding and as the gigglers know, we have the most fun
weekend.
Not only is Airbnb a great resource for finding places to stay, but you can also use your
spare room or home to host on Airbnb.
We use Airbnb a lot for our own trips, but somehow never thought about hosting on Airbnb.
Hosting with Airbnb is easy and a great way to make some money while you're on vacation.
You know I love to shop on vacation and hosting gives you some extra money to spend on yourself.
While you're away, your home could be an Airbnb.
Your home might be worth more than you think. Find out how much at airbnb.ca slash host.
I have Mormonism drama on TikTok.
Oh my God. Wait, did you see that Hulu shows coming out?
I can't freaking wait.
About the-
The Mormon moms.
Well, it's funny because I thought they were were gonna try to do a real housewives of,
oh I guess they already have that.
It's not like sitting.
Yeah, some of them are Mormon I do believe.
Some of them are Mormon.
So there's this guy, I forgot his first name,
but his last name was like Flippikowsky or something.
Okay, Flippikow.
Flippikowsky and he played for Duke
and he was like really good
and everyone was like excited to see him get drafted
and for some reason he wasn't drafted
in like the first round or whatever
and people were really surprised by it
and it turns out they give you like interviews
if you're gonna go pro about like your life
like they ask what's going on in your life
and someone in a podcast was like
it could be because of his girlfriend.
And everyone was like, what do you mean girlfriend?
They found out that he's dating a girl
who's six years older than him.
Six?
Or more, who used to be his babysitter.
And apparently they started dating when he was 18,
so she went to his prom,
oh no, when she was 26 she went to his prom at 18.
And apparently he's cut off his family
because of her and Mormonism.
What?
And his family's been on Twitter being like,
this girl captured our son through Mormon. Oh she's
Mormon he's not. But I think he's been converted and they think that she saw at
a young age like she was his babysitter and was like this guy's incredible
basketball he's gonna go pro I'm gonna lock him in and then use God. But now he never went pro.
I think he, so he got picked up, guess by who?
The Utah Jazz.
The Mormon State.
Okay, and so is he playing this year?
Yes, but people are worried that,
they're basically like, was she grooming this kid?
You know, it's interesting as much as like we obviously like ride for the girls
It doesn't really get talked about enough when like this it like it's the reverse and like a woman
Finds like a young guy and kind of like molds him like no if that was reversed and that was a man and he was
and kind of like molds him. Like, no, if that was reversed and that was a man
and he was 26 and he was the babysitter
and started dating her, the girl at 18,
we'd be like, shit was going on prior to that.
Women are so much more mature than men.
So like a 26 year old woman with an 18 year old boy
is like, incomprehensible.
No, I actually can't talk to men that are my age.
I'm even struggling with them being 35, 36.
No, men my age, I sit them down and I'm like,
hi, what are we trying to do?
What's going on?
Have you been to therapy?
You know what's so crazy?
How men our age get treated so differently
than like women our age.
Like my number one question is like,
when are you getting married when you're having a baby?
Like any guy friends that are like 30, 31,
no one would ever.
I wanna bring it up.
They're like, don't get a girlfriend, you're only 31.
It's like.
We're literally with us, they're like,
I think you have time, like you don't have
a geriatric pregnancy for another another three years, which is,
is that enough to fall in love and get married
and get pregnant?
Ooh, I don't know, freeze your eggs.
Start injecting yourself with hormones ASAP.
No, I literally do have to freeze my eggs.
I had that moment with Trevor Wallace, who's my age,
because I was looking at him and I was like,
we're in a similar place with like stand up,
we just had our first special come out.
And I was like, you don't feel any pressure
to like choose career or family right now.
And he was like, what?
And I was like, I literally am like,
do I shoot another special?
Do I try to have a kid?
Like, we're in such different positions. I literally am like, do I shoot another special? Do I try to have a kid?
We're in such different positions. It's crazy.
And just not even the sacrifices,
the rhetoric around having to say as a woman,
oh well, yeah, I wanna have a family,
but I also wanna do my career.
And it being a crazy,
people take sides in that topic.
It's so insane.
No, literally, Trevor Wallace and I
are a great example of two comedians
that we have our careers going,
but if I have a kid,
we're suddenly gonna be on a different path.
Yours will take a drastically different path.
And it doesn't mean that it's gonna be less successful,
like arguably, you know, I
I don't want to like I could get a lot of likes with a kid
Yeah, but like I don't know. I mean look I said I was keeping Daphne off Instagram and then I
Like she's gorgeous, but I'm telling people I do not want to post my kid for content
But with with that just you have such different situations.
I also have to say,
because I turned 33 last week or the other week,
I was like, oh my God,
because you know when you're 29,
people are like, you're a baby.
And then when you turn 30,
they're like, you're still basically 29.
And then when you're 31, they're like, you're still 29. And then when you're 31, they're like, you're still 29.
And then when you're 32, they're like, you're 30.
Then when you're 33, they're like, you're 40.
Yeah.
So it hit me like, okay, I'm not in my 20s anymore.
And then I realized that I always have wanted to be
like an older, cool aunt with some gray hair.
And that's who I wanna identify with.
I feel like so many girls,
their whole identity is being young and hot,
and I actually never felt comfortable
being young and sexualized
and people thinking that I was stupid.
And I'm kind of over it, and I can't wait to be older.
Oh my God, you're really taking back the narrative
and twisting it, and I love it.
No, I never felt comfortable when men were like,
she's young and hot.
And I never felt comfortable walking into like a meeting
and having to be like, hey,
like you can, can you guys please respect what I'm saying?
Do I have to repeat myself again?
Like I'm just annoyed with all that.
And that's what comes with being in your 20s.
And I just think that there's so many negativities with it.
I'm excited to be like,
I feel like everyone is someone different at heart.
Like in my heart, I'm 44.
I'm 44.
I will say on the plus side of like being in your 30s,
now when I am in certain meetings or Zooms,
I feel like I kind of fucked myself
because sometimes people are really looking to me
to like say something and I'm like, oh, sorry,
I forgot I turned 30 and like now you're kind of taking me
a little bit more seriously.
I still don't know.
Like I, like when you become a really
important part at work, it's like oh shoot. You have to listen to what people are saying on Zooms.
The con of getting older is you have to listen. No there's so many times where they're like,
Paige obviously you got the brief like you looked through it, and I'm like, yup, sure did.
No, no, I didn't.
And my mom has talked about when you get older,
sometimes you feel like you disappear sometimes a little bit,
but that sounds so peaceful, to just walk outside
and not be like, is someone gonna try
to grab my ass cheek?
Okay, very interesting, because I think I struggle
this is like getting so deep now I think I struggle with the opposite I think I struggle
with the thought of getting older and becoming more and more invisible when like for a while the norm was in your 20s,
you are so young and hot. And so like that's in your brain,
like, Oh, I'm young and hot. I'm going to be young and hot.
And then as you get older, it's like, like,
I feel like I first noticed it when Tik Tok really came out because like I would
see younger hot guys. And in my head, I'd be like, Oh,
you can't date them anymore,
they wouldn't wanna date you, you're older than them.
You know what's so funny?
We're not talking about 18 year olds,
we're talking about like 25, 26 year old guys, right?
Which we wouldn't wanna date anyway.
But like I would be like, how lucky would they be
to like sit with me and I would, the conversation,
and also they think I'm hot and I'm smart
and I'm successful.
Like I don't, I think it's,
you have been so pretty,
and it's part of your value intrinsically.
And it's not your, it's literally not your fault.
Talk about not your, it's really not your fault.
It's not your fault you're hot,
and everyone's told you you're hot your whole life.
For me, being hot has never helped me with anything.
It probably has in some ways,
getting on reality TV apparently.
No, you've definitely had pretty poor privilege.
It was never part of my ego.
Your identity.
My ego, yeah.
I never felt better about myself because I was pretty. It was more like you have to be athletic. You ego, yeah. Like I never was like, felt better about myself
because I was pretty.
It was more like, you have to be athletic.
You have to be.
Well, I think I was at like a young age put in.
Your model.
Even just being in school. Your child model star.
I was put in a box where it was like, oh, she's pretty.
So she must also be stupid,
which like, it was just a coincidence I couldn't read,
but that's not my fault. That was just a coincidence I couldn't read but that's not my fault.
That was just a really bad coincidence. So like she must be these other things.
So I think that's why I took it so seriously when I got older like dating
where I was like if you don't think I'm funny like that is my baseline.
Well that's the thing the people who fall in love with you are not gonna fall in love with you cause you're hot.
Right.
There's a bazillion hot people.
Right, which that takes a long time to like,
I feel like as a woman,
like learn that you have so many more things
to like offer than.
Your husband is not choosing you cause you're hot.
Your husband is falling in love with you,
which makes you hot, period.
No, I've dated some of the ugliest guys in America.
But I do have to say.
And I've loved them.
It's not, it is different with girls
because men, it's like, oh, they bring all these other things,
which, do they?
But with you.
Do they?
No, do they?
Your ego and your value has been attached to your looks.
So it's like, okay, if my looks change a little bit,
do I lose everything?
And that's how I felt like when I stopped playing tennis,
I was like, who the fuck am I?
Because all people liked me for was being a tennis player.
Right, and I think that's why like Botox is so rampant
and plastic surgery, because it's like, well, I can't,
this is the one, this is me, I can't lose this, but it's really not you.
Like your looks really aren't you.
Also, isn't there something so hot about someone
who is comfortable in their own skin?
Can we talk about that?
Yeah, like I always say,
I think especially living in New York City
because like our nightlife is a little bit different
and you're exposed to so many different types of people.
I have been at parties when I was in my early 20s
and seen girls who are a little bit older than me walk in
and their confidence was so crazy
and they were not the prettiest girl in the room.
No.
Where a model who was by far the prettiest girl in the room. No. Where like a model
who was by far the prettiest girl in the room so insecure like standing in the
corner her body language so you like almost don't notice her. People are not
factoring in energies when energies are like everything and also first of all
pretty like depends on so many. It's very subjective. It's very subjective.
Like it's also like what girls think is pretty.
Sometimes guys do not think is pretty.
No, that's actually so crazy.
I feel like there was just a TikTok trend
where people were like showing their boyfriends
like a girl that like every girl thinks is so hot.
And they're like, yeah, she's like, okay.
It's so like, you can't control how people view you,
how people see you through their lens,
but you can control your fucking energy.
And that's why I think like confidence is just so hot
and like how you carry yourself.
There's so many people online who get so many likes
and people are obsessed with them.
And then you're in the room with them
and you're like, their energy is so bad.
So bad.
And I think that's why the internet can be hurtful
and harmful because you're like, wow,
this person looks like an angel and everyone must be
obsessed with them, look how many likes they get.
But when they're in the room, no one wants to talk to them.
They have weird energy, they ruin people's day.
And I think there's also like the opposite effect too.
Like there are some people that it's like,
oh everyone hated them and then you're like,
they literally just have anxiety.
Yeah, even celebrities and stuff
and reality people especially,
I love hearing someone that you think everyone hates
then you're like, they're fucking hilarious.
They're the realest people.
They speak their mind.
They stand up for people
and you're like, oh my God, I fuck with that person hard.
Because sometimes the people who are curating so hard online
are the people who are hiding shit.
It's also just such a weird world because we are able
to see what people younger than us are doing
and what people older than us are doing.
And I feel like before the internet,
like you just knew what people your age were kind of doing
cause like when were you ever around?
Well, even the beginning of the internet,
MySpace was just the people our age.
And then when the parents came, we moved to Facebook.
I'm never around 23 year old girls in my everyday life.
But online, I'm seeing everything they're doing.
So like, like two girls fighting two 24 year old girls fighting on
Tik Tok. I'm not taking sides cause I'm 31 years old.
Like I, I'm not taking sides because these are like little girls to me.
No, you're right.
And they're doing very 23 year old girl things,
but it's just getting put on the internet
for everyone to see.
Wish, I wish.
Like, oh my God, the shit I would do at 23,
if I put it on the internet and now looking at it at 31,
I'd be like, I will freak the fuck out.
So like, I would never be able to take sides
with two young girls,
because I'm like, they're both have emotions.
They're both going through it.
They're both expressing themselves.
You can't take a side, they're kids.
But like other 23 year old girls on TikTok
are obviously like, I'm on this one side,
I'm on this one side.
But like being able to see it is all very,
like that also makes me feel much older.
Cause I'm like, oh, I get it.
But like, again, it's the girls fighting and where's the guy?
And it's funny cause some people are getting,
some people are getting mad and they're just like,
when girls fight on TikTok about a man,
it's like another girl on girl crime.
But I'm like, or are they both geniuses
and they're both getting more clout and more followers.
Neither of them are probably evil.
Like, you know, they're just being girls.
They're just like, they have emotions.
But also like, this is reality TV.
We're just watching reality TV, but like edited through their own
TikToks where you're seeing their own green screen interviews.
Yeah and there's no like guys sitting on a computer being like cut that part out.
Yeah but they're also like not able to show like actual footage of what happened.
It's just two girls being like this is what happened that night.
23? What was I doing when I was 23?
No I wouldn't go back to 23 years old.
No it's so scary. It's so scary. What was I doing when I was 23? No, I wouldn't go back to 23 years old. No, it's so scary. It's so, what was I doing when I was 23?
Where was I?
Who was I?
Oh, I was co-calling sales.
I was working at ABC News.
I was co-calling sales,
and I was obsessed with this one guy in the office
who was tall, painfully shy, never spoke to him.
Like he was shy, like I would talk to him
and he would be so shy.
And that was my dating life. When I was 23 I would actively watch my boyfriend leave the club with
other girls and I'd be like this is fine this is so fine this is okay I'm strong and then him be
like no the universe is testing me bringing her to our Uber. What are you talking? I'm like,
yeah, you're a gentleman.
The universe is testing me in a lot of ways. Oh, perfect mental
health moment. This girl Julia Messi, M-A-C-E-Y, I don't know
where I saw it. I wrote it in the notes said, the world won't
let you get comfortable where you don't belong. The world will
not let you find peace or settle where you shouldn't be.
No, honestly, the astrologers on TikTok this week have really been freaking me the fuck out.
Actually, some are going too hard.
Some are going way too hard.
Some are like your life-sending. And I was like, is that allowed? Is that legal?
They're like, if you're a Scorpio, your whole life is changing. I'm like, can we not?
I just got settled.
Also, if you get a bad one, you keep scrolling for a good one.
Yeah, I'm like, I don't resonate with that one, thank you.
They're like, you're just like really,
you're shedding things, you're changing your whole life.
I'm like, I don't wanna right now.
But let's normalize instead of taking bad experiences
or being uncomfortable or bad things happening to you
as like my life sucks,
being like, oh, I'm listening to this energy,
I'm not comfortable in this space,
I'm not saying to like quit all your jobs
and break up with all your boyfriends,
even though that's a good idea.
I'm saying there's a reason, you're not at fault,
there's nothing wrong with you,
you're not finding peace
because this isn't the place for you.
And let's keep moving, let's keep swimming.
No, your gut like always knows.
Well, that is, thanks for giggling with us.
Thanks for giggling slash crying slash like
figuring out the world's problems.
That was an insane episode.
We love you guys so much.
We're starting to make outfits for tour.
No, we're so excited, especially for Radio City.
That's like, I actually can't even say it out loud.
It like doesn't feel real.
So like, I don't think it's like actually hit me yet.
Yeah.
But the tour is freaking starting.
Tour is starting in like two weeks, three weeks.
I don't know.
We don't know.
We're living life day to day.
But we love you guys so much.
And we'll talk to you soon, bye.