Giggly Squad - Giggling about kissing, tipping, and illegal activity
Episode Date: August 16, 2023Paige and Hannah expose their Uber rating and producer Chris is getting sassy. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information....
Transcript
Discussion (0)
I'm gonna get you a new one.
I'm gonna get you a new one.
I'm gonna get you a new one.
I'm gonna get you a new one.
I'm gonna get you a new one.
I'm gonna get you a new one.
I'm gonna get you a new one.
I'm gonna get you a new one.
I'm gonna get you a new one.
I'm gonna get you a new one.
I'm gonna get you a new one.
I'm gonna get you a new one.
I'm gonna get you a new one. I'm gonna get you a new one. I'm gonna get you a new one. I said like fuck, what was it? It started with a J.A.
Yeah, but it was like, it's one of these random words.
It's funny that this is the hardest part of our part.
This is the hardest part.
Great, you've won, John! You've wonofy. Oh, that's a good one.
Why don't we let women speak?
Why don't we let women speak for once?
Do we want to talk about your transgression against women in the arts?
What?
What was that?
First of all, what does transgression mean?
The first time we were going to have our new female producer, Haley, here to record you
guys, you didn't even show up.
Okay.
Okay.
Okay. Okay. okay okay we hear that
information we totally are listening we acknowledge your feelings about it how
dare you weaponize your feet to turn women against women you're right Grace
did we actually have something scheduled?
I know for a fact we didn't book anything.
Grace said we didn't book anything.
Okay, what happened was you told me to reschedule it
to the following week at the time.
Yes, okay, so I did, I used it a back channel.
If so, facto, Chris is wrong.
Yes, this is a man's issue.
And you know what, we will send her a edible arrangements.
Yep.
Not to start all aggressive and man hating
because we would never do that.
Right.
But I almost got to fight with another man today.
About what?
First, actually, set me the scene.
Oh, girl.
Yeah, we're out of the way.
It's all story.
It's gonna take 10 minutes to get to the point.
So I was doing a little photo shoot.
We wanted to do new photos for Berner-Font,
because it's happening.
We're doing it.
At first it was like a test, and I was like,
and is it like 90s vibes?
The photo shoot, yeah.
Why are you two kidding?
You have gems on your eyes, yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Why did you say in that tone?
That's your perception of it.
I think I'm projecting.
I think you're projecting. Did you feel good about the gems? I wasn't secure about it, and you brought it perception of it. I think I'm projecting. I think you're projecting.
Did you feel good about the gems?
I wasn't secure about it and you brought it out of me.
I thought it might have looked stupid with the gems.
No, they do.
No, they look good.
There's a bar across the street from my house
and they have a really cool pool table
and we walk in and we nicely ask the bartender,
like, can we snap some picks in the back?
And the guy was like, yeah, of course.
It's like noon, no one's at the bar.
So you go in the back.
And this kind of like angry dude kind of like scuffs past us.
I don't know what scuffing is,
but you know what I meant.
I know what you mean, shuffles.
Yeah, and like angry.
And he scuffs.
So he scuffing.
So then he came back and he looks at us and he goes,
are you guys tourists?
So I'm a fan.
What is the age range of this man?
47.
Okay.
Like giving like angry divorce vibes.
Mm-hmm.
But he has a wife.
Right.
Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha.
Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha.
You know exactly the type of man you're talking about.
And I was like, no, I actually live across the street.
And but I didn't know if that was a good or bad thing.
Like maybe I should have said, Taurus.
But then he goes, you know, people pay thousands of dollars
to do photo shoots here.
And I was like, and I was, I was very nice,
but you could tell he just wanted to start something.
So I was like, let's get out of here.
So we started, what?
Did you get the shot?
Obviously.
He also was like, don't put your shoes on it.
And like 10 seconds later, I was standing on the pool table. I was like, sir
I would never disrespect the art of cool. I literally took a shit on the pool table and walked out.
Xia have a great day
So we walk out and we see him and he rolls his eyes at us. So I do my thing, which is thank you so much
Yeah, this is so helpful. This was so fun.
It made my day, honestly, made my year.
And it was my birthday this week.
So thank you, Happy Birthday from you to me.
Thank you for the present.
So I'm walking away.
And then he's like walking back and forth.
And finally, he comes back around when we're leaving
the sidewalk.
And he's like, these fucking people again.
And that's when I felt it coming on.
I felt Uber driver, fight Hannah coming back.
Oh my God.
And then I realized, again, he hates women.
Yeah.
Like if we were a bunch of men doing a photo shoot,
he'd be like, do you need help?
You take that lighting?
Yeah.
He'd get in the background.
He'd like make food and drink.
But thank God this morning I got my period.
This morning I got my period.
Sing up, giggling queens.
This has never happened in the history of Giggly Squad
because you're up birth control. I'm off birth control.
This is our natural body is being like,
who are we aligned with?
The question is who's the alpha? Who aligned who?
I would say that I aligned with you
because you've been off for longer.
Chris better watch the fuck out.
Chris is shaking, screaming, crying, throwing up.
So I literally got it and was like, hmm,
I have an extra mean this week.
No, I've been getting upset, but it's like,
the PMS upset feels so justified in the moment.
I cried about a monkey.
I hysterically cried about a monkey.
There is this Netflix show, I'm gonna cry right now.
But it basically shows how there's like two gangs
of monkeys, like the central gang and like the West gang
and how they like compete against each other.
There's just one monkey Gus that like no one wants
to hang out with.
And when they're explaining that Gus has no friends,
Craig standing in the kitchen and at the time he goes,
wouldn't it be funny if you started crying?
And he looks over at me and I'm
still crying.
Because there's no friends.
Discuss what jewel is on his eyes.
No, he has more glass.
Yeah, PMS thing is like.
So I was driving.
I was legally driving.
Yes.
I was gonna lie, but I was legally driving. Yes. I was kind of live. I was really good. Wait, where?
Because I wanted to play tennis with my new tennis best friend. Okay, allegedly. I was driving
to the... It does know. It does like, yeah, go. Does think something like practicing.
Okay. Also, like, there's no really, it's not like,
it's like stop signs, like there's no real roads.
You are a literal teenager right now.
You're like, whatever, I have my permit,
my jumps are already on my eyes, like I'm going.
I'm going to hang on my tennis fron.
I'm just going to hang my cold time.
I was like, what do I do?
I'm so scared.
So does it been telling me that you need to find
a good person to play tennis with?
It's not that easy.
Yeah.
So this girl named Madison came up with my FYP,
and she's like a day in the life of a Hampton tennis coach.
And she's like so cute.
And I used to teach tennis.
So I was like, this is so relatable,
except she made it look like so much more aesthetic and cool.
So anyway, I'm playing tennis,
we're having so much fun hitting together,
and I call does driving back.
And he's like, you've hit with her three times this week, why don't you, when we could be cool if he found some other players. And I was rubbing so much fun hitting together and I called does driving back. And he's like, you've hit with her three times
this week, why don't you,
when he could be cool if he found some other players.
And I was like,
why do I need some, but I love it.
It's not that easy.
And also like, you wanted me to find someone,
I found someone and now you want me
to find a whole herm of players.
I have a really, really hot take
that I'm actually so nervous to say out loud.
Well, I just said that I did a legal shit.
So what did you do?
Okay, so I went to see the Barbie movie.
And I'm so excited to have it.
I couldn't believe I hadn't seen it yet.
War all black guys women.
I didn't wear pink.
Me and Craig go.
It was great.
I loved it. I really, really liked go. It was great. I loved it.
I really, really liked it.
I thought it was really cute movie.
I totally got the message on what they were saying.
I'm not like freaking out about it.
I'm not like, oh my god, this is the best movie
our generation has ever seen.
Like this depicts the message they're sending so perfectly.
Like it was cute.
Like I thought it was a cute movie.
Yeah.
I didn't think it was, there was like one too many dance numbers
in it for me.
Oh, well you also hated dance number.
I hated a dance number.
You were gonna get one of anyone breaks into song.
In all male dance number?
No.
It's not for me.
You don't support men in the art.
Did anyone do a split?
I feel like at some point there was some guy doing a split.
They were all matching outfits.
Would you have sex with my ghost?
Well, yeah, I'm not blind.
I'm not awful.
Yeah.
But I just, I thought the outfits were great.
Would you see it again?
If it came on the TV and someone was like, oh, I'm watching this,
I might pop in, pop out, but I'm not
sitting for another two hours now.
What's a movie you liked more than a?
Oh my God.
That's really hard.
Because maybe this is like, you just,
you're not taking it back by movies.
Like I loved seeing everything they were wearing.
I love Margot Robbie.
I thought she looked adorable.
I loved all the Barbies.
I thought they, it was so cute and great.
I just wanted more like story.
Mm.
You know, like I wanted more things to happen.
I wanted them to be in the real world longer.
I wanted to go war.
Yeah, we can't.
I wanted, I just wanted more.
Yeah, there wasn't like a red wedding.
No, it just like, I don't know.
I didn't see it.
I have to see it.
Okay, great.
So I can't, I mean,'t see it. I have a secret. Okay. So I can't...
I mean, I support women in the arts for sure, and I'm so happy about it.
Well, I just personally, like, I do think it's just like Mattel winning again.
Except none of their sales have, like, gone up.
And next...
And we're, like, not going to be done with Barbie.
Next year is Barbie's 65th anniversary.
I was never a Barbie fan.
I was never, I really wasn't either.
I liked baby dolls.
Did you play with dolls at all?
No.
No, what did you play with?
Like give me from four to seven.
What was this my fucking toy?
The guy love this shit.
Yeah, I'm fucking this shit right here.
This shit right here.
This shit right here.
This shit right here is a play kitchen
anywhere in my vicinity.
I was fucking it up.
I definitely had, oh my God, did I not have a child?
No.
Did you literally just do this?
I used to play dress up and like,
and like perform music videos.
Okay, but you never like,
you never like played house with like a baby.
I was definitely not into caretaking of any kind.
I mean, you literally were tricked to clean a house
and raise a baby as a four year old.
That's child labor.
First of all, I was a single mother and I made it work. Okay, I had tricked to clean a house and raise a baby as a four-year-old. That's child labor. First of all, I was a single mother,
and I made it work.
Okay, I had things to do.
I was also, I doubled out her teacher.
So, you're like smoking cigarettes outside
like the air conditioner broke in the toy house.
Can I tell you a crazy story from my childhood
that just like depicts my families?
My dad's side of my family and my mom's side of my family
are two very different sides of my family.
My mom's side, chain smoking cigarettes,
just wild and crazy, not wild and crazy,
but like whatever.
They were like old school Italians.
Like they're lighting a cigarette at 7 a.m.
they just woke up like.
Indoor.
Yeah, indoors. Shout the door you're letting the smoke out They're lighting a cigarette. At 7 a.m., they just woke up like... Indoor? Yeah.
Indoor.
Shut the door, you're letting the smoke out.
Is the kind of a household I was raised in in the summers.
I'm a grandparents.
So much so that I would start smoking crayons
because I wanted to be like them.
So my grandpa bought me a box of candy cigarettes.
Well, we went on vacation with my dad's side of the family
to like a road island, like very preppy.
And something happened and they were pissing me off.
And we were like walking somewhere and I had had it
like with this side of the family.
And I looked at my mom and I said,
if I don't stop for a cigarette, I'll freak out.
Took it out of my Barbie purse, put it in my mouth
and was like, I need him.
I'm fucking dying.
I'm fucking dying.
And then you're like coughing too, you're like,
I'm like, it's too much walking.
I can't do this anymore.
I'd like to go home.
You burn it on someone.
Wait, I just envisioned you dropping it and stepping on it.
Yeah.
I'm obsessed with that for you.
Thank you.
Actually as a kid, I did, you know what?
You have those friends who were like truly demons.
Yeah.
But like they influenced you to be a demon as well.
Yes.
I had like a little evil friend and we'd get together.
We'd, she'd always have some kind of plan.
Like she was like, how I loved kids like those.
She was, she was like, always stealing something.
When it be fun, if, and you're like fuck.
So we go to her grandpa's house.
I didn't know it was like a big time lawyer,
like mafia guy.
I'm glad.
The biggest house I've ever seen, and she pulls me aside,
and she's like, we have to do something today.
And I was like, bitch, I'll do anything for you.
Where's the body, I'll hide it.
And it's the pure, how old are you?
Five. It's gonna make fun of us, because we I'll do anything for you. Where's the body, I'll hide it. And if the pure, how old are you? Five.
I guarantee we'd make fun of us
because we'd be whispering in the corner.
I was, we always loved to be up to something.
Yeah.
But I was scared of her.
You're easy to coerce.
I feel like, like, I could picture you as a five year old child
just being like, I don't want to,
but like, I'm gonna do it.
And then at the last minute, I'll freak out.
She was the kind of girl that like,
she was like, let's throw pebbles in the pool.
Yeah.
And they'd be like, if you throw one more pebble
and she'd be like, girl.
Yeah.
And then she's a bad kid.
Yeah, she's a bad girl.
What is she doing now, you think?
No one knows.
No one knows.
It's probably vast.
It's safest if we don't know.
So she basically was like, look, my grandpa is gonna die.
If he keeps smoking cigarettes,
we have to find all of his cigarettes,
and I know where all of them are.
We have to flush it out of the toilet.
I felt like I was Batman a robber.
You literally were saving the world.
This man had so many cigarettes.
We went in his car.
We got in his car.
There were like all these hidden stashes,
like in the kitchen,
she found everything,
and then we locked the bathroom door,
and we're flushing, we're flushing, we're flushing and I'm like we're saving this man's
life. He got so mad. He's going through nicotine.
I'm like, I couldn't imagine. I remember being home in the car and my parents were like,
so how was your day? You're like, while I single, handedly saved a man from
emphysema. What did you do today, mom? No, I remember we'd be at our house
and she'd have stashes of candy.
She's probably a drug dealer now.
Most like, she probably smokes now.
For sure.
When you told me to watch hijacked,
you didn't trust me, you didn't believe me,
you didn't give me a chance.
I watched.
I watched the trailer, you're a sicko.
You're on a plane every other week. I couldn't get through the trailer, you're a sicko. You're on a plane every other week.
I couldn't get through the trailer.
I was like, I fly too much to watch this.
This is insane.
And you were like, it's so easy.
I fall asleep to a, you really should tune in.
I literally am trying to find something to watch.
And I said to Craig, like, please, can we watch hijacked?
I can't listen to Hannah talk about it anymore.
And he was like, you can watch that on your own.
I've already watched the trailer.
It's too much.
He was like, I fly too much.
And he was like, you're such a little pussy.
You guys have to grow up.
And then I watched the trailer and I was like,
you're right.
I fly so much that I can announce,
like the Delta announcement in the beginning.
I sing songs to the, like, you know,
when you're sitting and they're playing
those, like, fake Taylor Swift songs,
why is it, no, there are some real Taylor Swift.
Some are fake, yeah.
Some are fake.
They do play a Casey Musgrave song too.
They do, about a butterfly.
Love that song.
I think it's because, like, if it did happen,
I now know what to do.
Right.
Right.
I'm Craig. Right.
I noticed because if your plane was hijacked,
you would immediately become Idris Elba
and take care of the situation.
I have to say something embarrassing.
I never really watched an Idris Elba show.
Mm-hmm.
And now I like, like I always thought it was hot.
Yeah.
But then you see how he's like a boss.
There's something.
This man.
There's something about his voice that you're like,
mm.
His voice,
his, just his demeanor.
Yeah.
And then he does is now making me watch the wire
from the beginning.
Oh my gosh.
Yes, he's in the wire.
He is.
He's just alba when he's young.
And I just watch hijack.
So I'm having this like beautiful moment.
Wait, the wire is not like super fucking old.
Like is it like about about the 90s?
Yes, it's, is it good?
It's basically about Baltimore.
I used to go, I was like gangs, right?
Yeah, I used to go through the stage
where I loved watching drug documentaries
where I wanted the police side, the drug cartel side,
and I wanted the heroin addict side.
Right.
Obviously, I want everyone to be represented.
And this is kind of like that where you see all the angles
Dominique Dominic West
Glad to know who yes, yeah, he's the British guy
Who was like having a fair with someone did he down like James? I think he's alive. Oh
Sorry
Chris can you be both Dominic West's them? You just have to have him choir.
Are you alive?
Great name.
He's in it, young.
Hot.
So I love you, Jisoba.
Okay.
I will protect him at all costs.
I love that.
Honestly.
He did do a Netflix show that was supposed to be somewhat like of a comedy, but I never
watched it if you're on a kick.
Yeah.
Okay, so the blind side stuff.
Oh, yeah.
So basically, the guy who it's about Michael Orr, this year,
like 2023, found out that the people that said that he adopted
him, like, Leanne and what's the husband's name?
No idea.
Whatever.
It doesn't really matter.
Leanne, Tuuy and her husband, like,
Leanne, what?
Tui is their last name.
You spelled out.
T-O-U-C-A-T-Y?
Tujji.
Stanley Tujji.
I don't know how the fuck she's spelling.
Stanley Tujji adopted a star football player in the 2000s.
Okay, Stanley 2G, can we talk about him for a minute?
Because not like, not the type of guy that would be my type,
but like, if he wanted to fuck, I would.
Actually, you do love men that look like your father.
Okay, that's so disgusting.
It's one guy, it's Ellie, it's Stabler, and everyone loves to.
And Ellie and Stabler kind of looks like Stanley Tucci.
Okay, also kind of Loki,
I have a thing for Kevin Costner,
and I feel like my dad looks like Kevin Costner.
People say my dad looks like in Costner.
And that's the one that should be therapist, for sure.
Actually, you're so right.
People stop my dad and say,
you look like Kevin Costner.
You're kidding.
Yeah, he got stopped once.
Pied my mom. He hasn't forgotten about it. He's been here, mom. Stop my dad and say you look like Kevin Costner. You're kidding. Yeah, he got stopped once
About it by your mom by a blind man
It's so easy making fun of dad and it's so fun
Okay, we're talking we also stay in Tucci. Yeah
His thing is playing gay men and movies, even though he's straight.
It's strange.
It is a bit strange.
I think he's just, he's in touch with his feminine side.
And he has like a whole show.
He has like a whole cooking show.
He's like in Italy.
He's making pasta.
He has like a really crazy life story.
He is married to Emily Blunt's sister.
He was married, his wife died of cancer,
and then he met this woman, and now they've been together.
Did they meet when he was shooting Devil Wars Prada
with Emily Blunt?
That I don't know.
That I don't know, but possibly.
Oh shit.
What?
What?
I don't know how to say his name.
Sammy Tucci?
Tucci and Blunt first met at the 2006 premiere
of the Devil Wars Prada.
You're kidding.
Wow, wow.
And who I thought premieres were just boring.
Wait, Stanley Tucci, his wife, Emily Blunt, Ryan Krizenski,
like that whole dinner party, a fun.
So fun.
So fun.
So fun. We fun. So fun.
We need like one more couple that like we would be friends with, but like don't actually
hang with.
But to like have a fake dinner party in your head with.
Yes.
This is the problem when you are in a relationship, it fucks up your friendships.
Because like, like every time I tell people I'm married, like a girl,
she always goes, oh, and I go, I know it's off-brand,
and then she's like, I guess we'll never hang out.
I'm not that I wanna hang out with her, but like.
I know exactly what you're talking about.
I'm gonna be honest, not.
Other married couples are chuggy.
Yes, other married couples are chuggy.
I wouldn't say that you and does are chuggy at all.
I thought you were saying, I would say you and does are married at all
No, but I'm yeah, that's what I was gonna say legit
I don't think of you as like in my married friend box in my head
I'm married people either because none of my friends are married
Some of my brother right, but that's not really my friend right that doesn't count
He doesn't even know he's a baby. He's a baby. That's different. That's a father.
That's a father.
Like, once you have a spawn, then yeah, we're never...
Did you just miss spawn?
I don't know why.
I literally never do it again.
I reared your child.
I reared your child.
Okay, where are we?
I've been trying to get this goddamn story out for 20 minutes.
Okay, fucking Stanley T.
You're so stupid.
Okay, fine side.
So basically, they told Michael or were adopting you.
But they never adopted him.
What the papers that he signed were basically like a conservatorship. So he is saying
that he didn't realize this till 2023, he's now suing them. The movie made like 300 million box
office. They definitely got paid for certain things in the movie. I don't think he did. So he's
basically being like, you made money. However much money you made off this lie that you are my adopted parents, like I want that.
Also, regardless if it was a lie or not, it's his likeness.
It's his fucking story.
Could you imagine like a movie being made about you
and like you not getting any money from it?
Also when they say conservatorship,
you just like immediately think of Britney Spears.
Right. Right.
Just like him and Britney Spears in the house.
Speaking of, did you see her like most recent video for like dancing
on a pole? I did for a millisecond, but I'm like so used to it. I just can't. Yeah,
it's just so like Britney. Just Britney being Britney. I guess, but it's a little unsedited.
No, we can say it. Let's all stop pretending. Let's all just say it. What's going to work?
We're scared or worried.
We're upset.
She's been freed.
She still needs help.
Yeah.
And you can't say anything because people are like, oh, don't get involved.
I don't know.
I'm scared to be canceled of saying something against Britney Spears, but something weird.
She's not okay.
She's not okay.
Right.
Did you hear that her book is not coming out because like all these people are suing her
to be like, you can't say that.
Like Justin Timberlake is delaying it being made
because he's like, you can't say
that shit about me in your book.
Oh, someone needs to leak it.
For sure.
Could you imagine?
I wonder what she's saying,
but here's the other thing.
She could be making a lot of it up.
That's true, but also, I do have to say, if I went crazy,
I would be doing so much worse than just spinning around on a strip of poll.
That's so true.
Like if I did it crazy, I would be sitting on an Instagram live
being like, this is what Justin fucking did.
Like, if I was really free and crazy.
Here's the other thing though.
Imagine someone wants to write something about you
that you potentially did at 17.
Like that's where I'm like, oh.
It's a bit.
What did you do at 17?
I mean, what didn't you do?
No, I was.
You were smoking by five, so what did you do at 17?
I was running card games on the corner of the street.
Okay.
Roll in the dice.
Roll in the dice.
I'm interested to see what happens with blind side stuff, but it does go back to capitalism
once again.
Barbie, that movie.
You have to, you guys, we have to think critically when the media throws stuff
at us.
The other thing I don't love is that Margot Robbie is like my age.
Oh, and I don't, for ever reason, I don't like it.
Oh, you know?
See, I don't get it so much.
Actually, no, she's your age.
Oh, no.
No, whenever someone's really successful when they're young, I always go, oh, they peaked.
Okay.
I want someone to say that about go, oh, they peaked.
Okay. I want someone to say that about us.
We haven't peaked.
We can barely read.
What do people were like, oh, Galey Squad's like,
all they'll do?
You know what, I'm fine with that.
I mean, we're fine.
There's worse.
We've done worse.
I do think though, like when people,
I almost feel bad for when people like,
low at least TikTokers at like 22.
Yeah. Because then they'll be like 33 and they're like, posting something and no one watches it and low at like these TikTokers at like 22. Yeah.
Because then they'll be like 33 and they're like posting something and knowing watch is it
and they're like, remember the good old days.
Do you feel like on your TikTok for you page that you have a lot more people that you
feel like are trying to get reality shows?
Oh.
Like I feel like every girl I follow on TikTok for whatever reason, I'm now seeing their whole family.
And like all these like little things.
And I'm like, there's just...
They're like, they're like, they're like,
they're like, no, like, is this because of the writer's strike?
Every family is trying to be the next like,
Kardashian family.
Oh, I, I know.
You know, I'm so involved in the writer's strike.
Yes.
Page is very involved in that.
Wait, your Instagram today was so funny
when you said an Oscar.
You're like, oh, we're gonna win an Oscar. Okay, there is a strike
Started laughing so funny. Well everyone in the industry right now whenever you do something like
But there's a strike and I'm like I get obviously no for sure
I'm not comedian with no health insurance, but yes, I support the strike. Yes
We're boxers with no health insurance. Do you not have health insurance?
I mean, I have to buy my own.
Yeah.
You have on here oversized sunglasses,
which I'd love to know.
Oh, I'm upset.
OK.
About.
I was looking at what's trending, and I was like, oh,
I'm going to ask Paige if this is correct or not.
And it says, tiny sunglasses are out.
Yeah.
Big sunglasses are in.
Obviously, my retina is happy about that, because...
Right.
But like, I have a shaped head, not to brag.
Yeah.
I have a very tiny head.
Yeah.
A very small, little petite head.
They called me peanut as a child.
And...
Did that happen?
Yes.
When I wear big sunglasses, I look like a mosquito,
and not a sexy mosquito.
A mosquito has seen some shit who's not doing well.
You just need to find the right shape for your face.
I know what it is.
Okay.
And it's a small sunny that is a little cat eye or like a little round.
You can do that in a, you don't have to go like full oversized where it's like it's down
to here. They're trying to go back to where it's like it's down to here.
They're trying to go back to like Marikain Ashley,
like Y2K, like big clunky ones.
Ashley just had a baby.
Oh, yeah.
I wonder if her baby is gonna look like
the other one's future baby.
You wonder if her baby is gonna look like
the other one's future baby, like if the cousins
will look similar.
Yeah, because they're like sisters, so sometimes.
Are you fucking scientists now?
I mean like, are you fucking scientists?
Like if you have a child, it will probably resemble Lois
at some point.
I don't know, actually I have cousins
that look literally like nothing.
For turtles, twins could look completely on a like.
Okay, what are you a scientist?
Yeah.
Wait, what were we talking about? I was gonna say something really nice too
because I thought of it when I was really high
the other day and I wrote it down.
But now I don't even know if I want to.
I was PMS-ing.
And you thought, oh, you had an emotional PMS.
I had an angry PMS week.
OK, I was so emotional.
Where you're like thinking the meaning in life,
and you're like, why am I here?
Or like, I would just, like, I would
see something that would never make me emotional.
I wouldn't even think twice about it.
And I'm like, am I tearing up?
Like, why is this?
My mom came down for like four days,
and I wouldn't let her leave.
I was like, no, I really, I don't feel good.
What if I pass out and I die and you're not here?
She's like, should I change my train?
And I'm like, I think so.
And then she got home.
This is the worst part.
You know, like when you're in high school or something
and you know that your parents talk about you
and like sometimes you've heard it and you're like,
fuck them.
Like, what are they saying?
I think my mom got home and had like a serious conversation
with my dad just like about me mentally.
And my dad called me and he was like, okay.
We do not well bitch.
I was doing not well bitch.
If they had this entire sit down,
and they had an intervention with us.
They're like one step away from handing me a
conservatorship
My dad goes like look we've talked about it and we've decided that like you really can't go more than three weeks without seeing your mother
And like I'll send her down every three weeks because you're not you're not well
When my parents still live in the city
I had dinner with them once a week to stay sane like I'd feel myself like
and I went them once a week to stay sane. Like I'd feel myself like,
or I can, I'd be like,
what is my mom?
You just get off track and you need your parents to like,
we wouldn't even talk about anything.
We just sit down thinner.
My mom would like have clean plates.
I'm like, oh, come cook meal and you eat
and you feel normal again and then you go off
into the scary world.
Yes.
Thanks for coming up and you go back.
My mom's like, you're in this apartment
too long by yourself.
You're making yourself crazy. I was telling
Does a story that the day I was like I was playing tennis and then these adults came out and does goes adults
And I was like these adults and he's like kind of you are an adult. I'm like no
No, I can't hear that no no no
Someone more adulty these like 50 50 year old people were you like dinner and we were playing tennis on like the adults came out
He's like you you're 32.
You're an old 32.
No, no.
I can't.
That's why I like to surround myself with like
younger, stupid people.
Because I can't better.
I knew.
So the thing I was going to say about you
that was really nice is how it feels weird.
But you're my most inspiring friend.
Like I don't think I have another friend.
I'm just, don't get people mad at you.
I'm like, I love you.
I love you friends.
I lined them up and I was like,
you're a loser, you're a loser.
What are you doing here?
You're a loser.
No.
How'd you get it?
I'm not a loser.
I'm not a loser.
I'm not a loser. I'm not a loser. I'm not a loser. I'm not a loser. I have a friend, I lined them up and I was like, you're a loser, you're a loser. What are you doing here?
You're a loser.
How'd you get in?
No, you're like, you're the one that I actually thought
was gonna do the worst and you came out from a horrible place.
We all thought you were not gonna make it.
No, I don't mean it like that.
I mean it like, if I was doing my career and I didn't have you,
I probably would have, would like, stop, stop.
But I would get lazy, I feel like.
Like, I feel like every time you're always doing something
and you're very motivational.
Oh my god, thank you.
I do think in my heart of hearts, I'm a coach.
Because I come home with family of coaches. Oh my God, thank you. I do think in my heart of hearts, I'm a coach. Because I come home with family of coaches.
Like my grandpa was a coach.
Like you're just always thinking of like, what can I do next?
And it's very inspiring.
First of all, thank you.
I know it's difficult for you to say, especially because we've been fighting this whole
pod.
But I'm also like, on my period, so it's just like, we both are.
Second of all, I feel like if I have people around me, it's like, it's hard to be nice
to yourself, but it's easier to be nice to yourself, but
it's easier to be nice to other people.
And if I can't help myself, I want to help other people.
And I've always been inspired by you because you're just so naturally talented.
Thank you so much.
Not with actual things, but silly things.
Right, silly things.
Stupid things.
Like, beer pong.
And I'd like to see people hit their full potential.
I'm kind of like a friend agent, if you will.
Yeah, I just think you're like,
I never get complacent because of you.
But you know I'm not judging you.
Like I'm not like, no I would not.
Okay, I'm not like,
well you know, at the end of the day,
you think about you and only you.
Obviously, I just wanna make quick,
let you know I don't go to sleep
and I worry about you. I'm not gonna really care only you. Obviously. I just want to make quick. Let you know I didn't go to sleep and I didn't worry about you.
I'm not going to really care what you're doing.
Wait, that's so true.
Do you know what I love about our friendship?
Hmm.
When you think I might be mad at you, you just ask me.
Yeah.
And you 100% trust my answer, right?
1000%.
I feel like there's been like four times in our friendship.
We're all send a wait.
Are you mad at me?
So you did it.
If you can't ask your friend, are you mad at me?
There's something deeper like fucked up with your friendship
that you haven't resolved.
If you can't ask your friend if she's mad at you,
I mean, she's mad at you.
Yeah.
So Paige texted me recently.
Are you mad at me?
And I knew she wasn't in a normal state of mind.
Because Paige gets a little paranoid at around 9 p.m.
I forget every night.
And that's one of the crazy questions about coming.
And it's like talking her off a ledge.
Every night around the same week,
I always need to be talked off a ledge.
I'm like, everybody hates me.
Even you being worried that I might be mad at you
shows you care about me.
Yeah, I wouldn't care for anyone else who's mad at me.
Like, I feel like people have told me,
hey, I'm mad at you and I've been like, I don't care.
That is something to do with me.
No, the fact that you were worried
was actually the nicest thing you could have said.
You could have said, happy. So, all right, then, you could have said, I love you, your gay friend. You going, I hope you're not do with me. No, the fact that she were worried was actually the nicest thing you could have said. You could have said happy, so very thin.
You could have said, I love you, your gay friend.
You going, I hope you're not mad at me.
I was like, I'm an important person in this person's life.
Also, I don't get mad at women.
I'm just gonna say that right now.
I don't get mad at women.
I even said to Grace, if it was a woman today
that yelled at us or said like these fucking people again,
I immediately would go, she's going through something hard and I hope she gets better.
Where a man I go.
How fucking dare you.
Yeah, how dare you.
What the fuck are you going through?
I contacted Grace in an uproar this week in a literally fighter flight moment.
She's sidebarred with her.
Oh, I see.
Me and Grace sidebar a lot.
Because me and Grace are barred too.
We all have to, you're texting plan
probably needs to be up because it's I sidebar. We have a group chat
with Grace, our Gen Z correspondent. Yes. And now I realize we both have
individual relationships that are probably very different. We're in
three group chats with Grace. Yes. Plus, we are sidebarring.
I sidebar her and I'm like, this is the most difficult task I'm ever going to ask you.
And it needs to be ASAP.
I need an IV injected into me.
No later than 20 minutes.
So dramatic.
So dramatic.
Where's Craig?
I went out.
Okay.
I had three cosmopolitan's.
What, my goodness. I'm gonna put it in my butt. That's literally who I was immediately called for an ambulance. I was like I have to go home
I
Mean I was kind of martini. No Hannah. This is no Hannah. I literally thought that I was drugged
I was like to someone put something in my drink. Thank you. He drugged yourself with a martini
Everyone was like you had seven drinks and two shots.
No one drugged you.
No one drugged you.
You absolute alcoholic.
It was like in train work,
wrecked with Amy Schumer.
She's like, I'm so hungry.
I didn't eat anything.
I didn't eat anything.
She had a burrito.
She plays a pizza.
She's burger.
So that was literally me to my mom.
I was like, I didn't even drink anything.
I had two dirty martinis, three cosmopolitan's
and two lemon drop shots.
It was nothing. I threw up in drink anything. I had two dirty martinis, three cosmopolitan's, and two lemon drop shots. It was nothing.
I threw up in my purse.
You love to do that.
I have it.
Was it for real?
I only throw up in elite, expensive, real designer purses.
Never in my lifetime have I gone out to some stupid club
with a fucking Zara purse and vomited in it.
I've only thrown up in Fendi and Chanel
because I'm classy. The Uber didn't know, which was the biggest defeat of them or biggest
food in the mall. Not to get into the details, but was it one like that or was it like
a bubble, a bubble, a bubble, a bubble, a second one. Definitely the second one. Here's
what I did. When Des it says that we're adults,
we certainly are not.
I said, I'm gonna, I am at the bar and I'm going.
I'm like, oh, yeah, I have a certain amount of time
to get home before this is terrifying
and I literally have to run away.
I get in my Uber, I'm like, okay, I'm in a nut.
So you're not with Craig.
No, I'm not with Craig.
I'm by myself.
I'm alone, fending for myself out here in the wild. It's also mind you 10 30, okay?
You haven't even started yet turning 30 people haven't even started and I'm like I'm putting myself in an Uber
I'm a menace to society
Who is this old lady
This is associating immediately
I get me Uber. I'm the boss of the situation. This is associating immediately.
I get me, Uber.
I'm like, I have 15 minutes before I'm about to just burst.
I can see that we're only on like,
first mouth or mouth.
No, I'm a thrower.
See, I'm the other way.
I can see that we're at ninth street.
And I'm like, I'm not making it.
I have to walk away to fucking 37.
I'm not making it.
So you would never be like, stop. Let me handle something on time. No, because what I'm throwing, I'm not making it. I have to walk the way to fucking 37. I'm not making it. So you would never be like, stop.
Let me handle something on time.
No, because what I'm throwing up on the streets of New York City.
I'd much rather do my Chanel.
I was like, this incognito, I need to know and to know.
I take my keys out of the bag because I'm like,
I can't go in and get my keys.
I take nothing else out.
I keep my phone in there, my wallet, my makeup.
It's a clutch purse. so when I open the top,
like my face is covered, so the driver can see me
and I'm just vomiting, vomiting, vomiting.
On to your phone.
Straight on it.
Shut my bag, I get to my destination, I get out,
I go into my apartment, I throw my bag, I get in bed,
I'm like, hey mom, my mom was there.
I pass out, I'm dead.
You threw the bag out your mom.
Check it, I'm dead.
Catch!
I wake up the next morning at 7 a.m.
I'm vomiting every 15 minutes.
I can't keep anything down.
It's literally like the time in Philly
where I thought I was dying.
Yeah, I remember.
I text Grace, I'm like, it's just an emergency.
I need an ER doctor immediately.
She sends me an IV person.
I'm getting my IV.
My mom cleans my bag.
I couldn't charge my phone for eight hours because I kept getting this alert.
Water liquid detected in the charging cord.
You put in rice.
No, I just like fucking waited.
Yeah, because you literally puked
all your martinis and lemon drops into the phone.
I puked water.
I was puking water.
I had nothing in me
of throwing at my own stomach.
You have great aim.
No, I can, yeah, I can puke
like nobody's business.
It's not great.
So, great save, do you?
Moral of the story, Grace saved my fucking life.
And I'm not drinking anymore. But I feel like you've been drinking this summer. There were like
three nights this summer where I went out. Yeah. I went out and I'm done now. Like I'm done for
the fall. Don't invite me anywhere. Don't ask me to do anything.
I won't be drinking at any event.
I literally don't drink anymore.
It's too hard.
So I will go off on these mocktails.
These places now have these fancy mocktails.
Like lavender, bee pollen.
I'm down to have a cocktail or whatever,
but if I'm going out or like I know're legit, I know I'm gonna be somewhere
where I'm drinking multiple drinks,
I can't do anything the next day
and I can't do anything the day after that.
I need a full 48 hours to figure out who I am
and what that same weekend I cried about the monkey.
It was just like a whole lot of things.
Do you feel like people who,
there should be more places where people are just like,
drinking CBD drinks and like eating edibles
and like, that's the bottom.
I think there should be more THC drinks.
Yeah.
Like why can't I go to a bar and progressively get higher
and higher and higher and higher?
Because nothing bad happens when you're high,
oh, what you'll eat a whole pizza?
Yeah, wait, so what bag to do throw up into?
Okay. A bag that I rarely use my ex-boyfriends mom gave it to me.
And so then my mom was like, oh my God.
Is it your favorite boyfriend?
Certainly not. Okay. Good.
Probably one of my least favorite ex-boyfriends.
If I had to write back, honestly, I was feeling fine.
Saw the bag. I thought about him.
Maybe my mom was like, keep it a hex on you.
So you keep ex-boyfriends gifts if they're good?
Only if they're really good.
Like that one, it was a gift from his mom
and it was a Chanel, what was I gonna do?
So I kept that.
Oh, she wanted you to marry him.
Yeah, she just like randomly gave it to me one day.
I was like, no, I really can't take this.
And I tried to refuse like, right time.
You're like, I'm your son. I was like, no, I really can't take this. And I tried to refuse like, right time. You're like three years on.
I was like, I've been mentally dear and a great longer.
Save this for someone who will care.
But I will keep this for the rest of my life
or I will sell it on.
We're back.
We're back.
We're back.
We're back.
We're back.
We're back.
So.
What did your mom say after you puked?
I feel like if I puked after night out,
my mom is like, do we have an intervention? No, she was so cute.
She was just like, oh my god, I think,
like, you're so pretty.
Someone definitely tried to put something in your drink.
I'm sure they did.
I was like, they did.
They literally did.
They got newer here.
You're always like the victim at the end of the night
when you just did it to yourself.
Yeah, it did make sense.
Like, the next morning, you're like, why?
I walked in being like, I'm getting fucked up.
Then I did it.
Well, I'm proud.
If anything, I'm a woman of my word.
On my own birthday, I ordered it as press martini
and then the people I was with drank it.
Wow.
But it wasn't the right ratio of values.
As press martini.
I can't do it anymore.
So what is our drink now?
So we said we quit drinking.
Green tea.
Shots.
Camomile.
No, literally.
I think it's-
Well, I think I need to take like a small break.
I think I-
Like next time I go out, I'm just going to try and get
celters with like a lime so people aren't like,
oh, are you not drinking?
Oh, are you drinking? He just drinks water, he always drink water with a lime
and no one's ever asked him anything.
He's also a man.
So I'm taking a break from drinking.
I hated Barbie and you're inspirational. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha rating. Wow. Who, Chris, who do you think is going to have a better Uber rating? We are
page. I think he has got it. Okay, why? Because I threw up in one Uber. Yes. Oh, bitch has
gone up. Wait, where do you even find this account? So I have to say that when I was pardoning
in the Hamptons, I was the more sober one, so I was the one who always called the Uber,
and then someone else would be rude to the cab driver,
like take the off-sort.
I don't need a whole life story.
But with that said, who should go first?
Okay, let's go number by number.
First number, four, point, nine.
Nine? Who's dick are you sucking?
4.94 to be exact
This is this is actually the most page shit I've ever seen in my life
I get away with you don't even talk since high school like my girlfriend like my best friends in high school
Would do something sneak out do something? You don't even talk since high school. Like my girlfriend, like my best friends in high school
would do something, sneak out, do something,
get into a fight with someone else in school.
I would be the one saying like the bad shit
or be like orchestrating the bad shit
and I would never get in trouble.
That's the highest you've ever heard.
Yeah.
After you puked in an Uber,
the guy said it was like five stars.
He was like, thank you so much.
I got a 4.87.
I am, I'm trying to think.
I am a little reckless with the like,
I order an Uber and then like the elevator.
Yeah.
Yeah.
You are as bad as me with that stuff.
Yeah.
But I probably Uber more than you.
I also do like real late night Ubering
because of, I'm trying to come up with a excuse
and I can't find it.
You know what, maybe it's just,
I'm telling you, Uber page is different.
She's, she's paggy.
Like it's really at all her.
It's not, it's not, it's not mine.
Do you have an advice for people to get their Uber in
up since obviously you know it's just the thing?
Go by whatever name they call you.
I've never once corrected someone.
What do you say when the Uber is done?
Thank you, have a good day.
Do you always say have a good day? Do you always say have a good day?
Yeah.
I say have a good day.
I say have a great day.
Are you tipping every time?
Yeah.
Because they took it out.
Wait, wait, wait.
I thought that's confusing to me.
It's very confusing.
So you have to tip now.
Yes.
So do you think you tip and then they give you five stars?
Yes.
Do you tip every time? Yes. Okay. I did not know this. Chris, you know you should tip.
Because no. I didn't. But what was your score again? 4.94. I mean, oh, 4.87.
Mine's a 4.88. Chris, this isn't about you. I only recently started tipping because I only recently realized
that it's not included anymore.
Okay, because before they never even
give you the option to tip,
and then they just start giving us the option.
Now it's like five stars ad tip.
Okay, this is, do you tip when you are at a coffee shop?
And you ask for a cold brew,
and they turn around and they give it to you,
and then it says, do you want a tip 20% on your $8 cold brew and they turn around and they give it to you and then it says do you want a tip?
20% on your $8 cold brew. No, I'm not tipping there
But if I'm in a drive-through Dunkin Donuts, I'm tipping out a drive-through Dunkin Donuts
Why because my dad does I love that's the only reason but any other drive-throughs
No, I support big corporations, but at the local little cafe?
Fuck that.
Fuck that shit.
More Carter.
I'm not going into coffee shops, I feel like.
I feel like I am,
and I feel judged by the person behind me,
so I always leave like 15%,
but that should like adds up.
I've always wanted to be the person
that starts the like,
all paper the person behind, but I always get like, I'm like, that's so be the person that starts the like, I'll pay for the person behind,
but I always get like,
I'm like, that's so dorky, I'm like,
the person behind's like, I'll buy the shop.
The person behind's like,
I need 17 cool songs.
No, the tipping has become strange.
And then, desks from Europe, they don't tip in Europe.
Right.
Craig and I are a big tipping couple.
Yes.
Because I think we think it will get us more things, but it never does.
No, tipping is really good karma. Have you ever seen like a dumoir that's like this celebrity
doesn't tip? I feel like it's the most embarrassing thing that could happen to you.
I feel like a lot of time too, because sometimes they don't even bring a check to whoever that is.
Like I've been at restaurants before
where they've been like,
Paige, thank you so much for comp,
it's like my friends.
Yeah.
Like thank you so much for coming,
like this one's on us.
And I could see how certain people are like,
oh, we're leaving, but like you still have to tip.
But then you also don't know how much the total was
to give the right amount of tips.
So you're like, okay, I'll give a couple hundred.
It's just like a big dinner.
Yeah.
It's, look, money is difficult.
Do you believe in money manifestation that the more you give, the more you make, the
more you put it into the world.
And if you hold onto it too tight, and I'm not giving you guys, do not go home today and
spend all your money on Zara.
Right. Not like that, but yes, I do believe it. Do not go home today and spend all your money on Zara.
Right, not like that, but yes, I do believe it.
I have a money tray.
That's how much I believe in money manifestation.
You need to get one.
I've had it for three years.
I'm an August Leo, so I just have like...
LAUGHTER
LAUGHTER
I don't know why, but I wanted to say back like,
I'm an diabetic.
Does it make any sense?
Also, I feel like you could like do more for the PCOS community.
Yeah, I really, I try not to be associated.
I try.
Because I have something, are you, like, what's going on?
Because I see celebs be like writing this whole thing about like, I just go for a PCOS and I'm like, and I'm like be associated. I try like, because I have something, are you, like, what's going on? Because I see celebs be like, writing this whole thing
about like, I discovered PCOS and everything,
and I'm like, please, guys.
I just have gas.
You're with the PCOS.
You're with the PCOS.
Well, I'm going to the Guinecom colleges, actually,
I'm Thursday, so we'll take,
I need to get an ultrasound.
Ultrasound.
Yeah, who knows what happened that day.
But like, are you okay? Yeah, I haven't had any pain since then,
but I need to go get an ultrasound.
I just don't want to have to go back on birth control.
And everyone who has PCOS is on,
has to be on birth control.
And I don't want to.
You like Tonya, you just don't want to take your meds.
No, I don't want to take my meds, they can't force me.
Speaking of, there's documentaries out on what's it called?
I saw that. It's on Hulu,'s on who I think it's HBO HBO about
their divorce yet.
Did you see the people oh really it's like one of those like
quickly put together there's a right to straight like people
max it's so weird it's two episodes one Kanye side and one's
Kim side but it's basically just different reporters
explaining the same story for both.
Like from the, so like you're basically two
of the same episodes, but like one of them, Kim's,
they're like, Kim, like just wants to protect her family
and one, they're like Kanye is a creative genius.
Recently, one of my dad said one of the most iconic things
I've ever heard, we were in the car
and there was a Kanye West song on
and he had like changed the station.
And I think my brother was like,
oh, I like that song and my dad without hesitation goes,
we like him.
Like he had declared the disorable family
as team Kim Kardashian.
And like straight face.
You guys have feminized on.
We like him.
A literal feminist icon.
I also keep seeing on my TikTok
that people are talking about Kanye's wife
and how like is anyone-
She's the one conservatorship.
Is anyone checking in on her
because she was like a completely different person
before she's like married him.
She's have like long, luscious brown hair
and she wore like normal outfits.
Now she's like bald and like wearing sheer.
Yeah, over her face.
Yeah, over her face.
She was trying to rob a bank.
Imagine you're dating a guy and he goes,
I think you look really good
if you just covered your face and went to dinner.
I agree.
You're like, why didn't I think?
You know, I didn't want to put makeup on tonight.
So this is actually perfect.
How am I going to eat?
It's like the guy that,
when it looked at my face,
when he had sex with me,
and I was like,
thank you.
If you could not look at me,
that'd be great.
I'd have a more enjoyable experience
if I couldn't see your face.
Thank you so much.
It is funny that,
good times that you have sex
where like, you,
and you never looked at each other,
you never kissed.
See, the nold hands.
Wait, I just had this conversation with somebody
and they were really worried for me.
No.
Someone was like, oh, I love,
I forget what they were even talking about.
But like, they were talking out during sex.
Yeah, they were talking about like four playing,
like making out.
And I genuinely had to sit and think, like,
oh, what am I, the 13th, then I'm just out here making out?
I think Craig wants to make out too.
It's probably so bad.
I just find it like, yeah, we get it.
We're already here.
We've already both agreed.
The thing with marriage, it convinced me.
With marriage, you get busy.
And, like, sometimes I'll literally, like I'll literally, I just ate an onion soup.
Yeah.
And then for whatever reason, next thing you know,
and it's like, okay, we're not kissing right now,
but there's another hole.
No, I haven't.
I.
Do you kiss tonight?
No. I think I'm think Greg like kisses my forehead.
I said something really nice to Greg the other day
and he goes, thank you so much.
I know that was a lot for you.
And I go, how evil?
Because very evil.
Very, very evil.
I've never been like a huge like make out person
because I find other people's tongues like disgusting
Like yeah, we get it like but I don't want it like all over my mouth like all inside my mouth
Yeah, so I've never but there's like three weeks that you do want their tongue in your mouth
Yeah, I for like 15 seconds, and then I'm like I got it
Like yeah, we did it
You know wait I think it's enough.
I think I saw a meme that was like,
hey, do you want to awkwardly try to find a rhythm
and never get it for three minutes,
while kissing?
Yeah.
And then you're like, you don't know who's leading.
And then you try to lead with the tongue
and you're like, was that aggressive?
I have been in situations where I've stopped
and been like, why don't you take it down a notch and just follow me?
Yeah.
Like I'll do it.
Yeah, but it's like, that's not my job.
I also feel like there's no, you can't get closer to me.
You were just inside of me.
There's nothing closer that we could do.
See, someone's like kissing is more intimate than sex.
Like a prostitute will be like no sex. Like, our prostitutes will be like, no kissing.
I'm a prostitute.
I think it's the prostitute.
We have boundaries.
I have boundaries.
You do have, you are literally such a cat.
It's hilarious.
I'm such a cat.
I got excited about something the other day.
And Craig was like, oh my god, you never get excited.
Like, that just made me excited.
And I was like, yeah, because you're a dog. And like, I could walk in and be like, oh my God, you never get excited. Like that just made me excited. And I was like, yeah, because you're a dog.
And like I could walk in and be like, oh my God.
And you'll immediately match my energy.
Which is so funny.
Like when you see a dog and you're just like, ah, ah, ah, ah.
And the dog's like, ah, ah, ah, ah.
Yeah, they just like freaking, but that's so,
we're not gonna be like, stop.
Yeah, I'm like, you're getting wildly excited for something menial.
I think more guys to start sex could use like a kiss or two, like a little just soft kiss.
I love a soft kiss.
Nice and soft, not trying to like get in my ovaries with your tongue.
Right.
Aiden actually does his brother who's single at Aido Bishup, everyone check him out.
I'm just slinging down around.
Literally, literally trying to find so many people.
As this are a lot to add your test team.
He said something so funny and cute today.
He goes, you know a date's going well when she touches your elbow.
Your elbow.
Okay.
And do you know how in a date,
you find me, see laugh, and you subconsciously will go,
yeah, like touch that.
And it's not in any cute place.
It's literally a touch, but he goes,
but I, I can't touch an elbow, because that's weird.
And he's so right, like if a guy in a date
randomly touches you, you're like, oh.
Yeah, gross.
But if I'm touching your, like, just parts arm mm-hmm. He's like we're fucking yeah
like we're fucking if I actively
Touch you I'm into you because it's funny because you know the guy wants to fuck the guy's always down to fuck whether he loves
You were a two right but you need to get a elbow touch from the girl to know wow
That's a good like
from the girl to know. Wow.
That's a good, like,
barometer to see how things are going.
And if you think back to the date,
like, oh, was it good, was I into it?
And you think, oh, I touched him.
So I must have been into it at the time.
I'll always do it when I'm laughing accidentally.
Yeah.
I like when they touch your knee under the table.
Only if you're into him.
Right.
If you're not into him,
he touches your knee.
I'm like, I will kick you in the nut tack so hard.
Also, I'm a very sweaty person, so like, a guy will touch my lower back and I'm like,
oh no.
On my first date with Dess, I was in Sack Harbor sweating profusely, he touched my lower
back and I was like, this is the end for me.
And did he say anything about it?
No.
I can see it.
Like, I'm literally see this wet point up. I'm getting my. Like I'm literally sitting. No, I can literally see this what, point up.
I'm getting my whole body lizard in the fall.
No way. Wait, I want to come with you because I want to do my legs and my vagina.
I need to get my chin.
Okay, my vagina.
I also need to get like, this is so graphic, but you know, you get the Brazilian.
It comes with the butthole.
Yeah, they don't talk about...
What about... Under the butt. That area under the Brazilian. It comes with the butthole. Yeah, they don't talk about under the butt.
That area under the butt. Yeah. I think that's part of your legs.
My upper upper upper leg kind of bottom of the butt. Yeah, I think it would be their leg package.
Okay, because I did look at this one place and it called it like the inner butt.
All I know is I'm gonna spend a lot of money.
Wait, I'm gonna tell you something.
Last time I went, I ended up having to leave
because usually I have a pretty high paint tolerance.
Did you do it with the air or with the pregnancy gel
that they put on?
Because you have to do the air.
The pregnancy gel.
I can't remember which one it was.
I want to say it was the pregnancy gel.
Yeah, the gel hurt so much.
If it's for beauty, I will, like, withstand it.
You could torture me for 10 hours,
and if they said, like, you're going to be stunning after,
I'm, like, start the clock.
I had to leave in the middle of it,
because I had my period, and I was so sensitive.
Like, and it was my legs.
And I was like, I've done my underarms,
I've done my face, I've done my bikini.
Like, this should be a walk in the park.
If you have your period, you can't go.
Because your body is like way too sensitive.
This has been a period piece.
This has been a vagina monologue.
Yes.
This episode.
Also, one place does your feet, but I don't actually have,
I'm too prideful to get my feet done.
You're my Adam Sandler.
And I love it.
You're my Jonah Hill.
Thank you for the same one.
Who knew who you are?
You're my Timothy Chalamet. They're my... Who knew who you were? You're my...
Timothy Schalamet.
They're like best friends, but they're quirky.
Are they best?
Oh yeah, you're my Timothy Schalamet.
They like play basketball together.
Yeah, they're both like, you're both like,
crooked bodies.
No, our kids would be interesting looking.
I'm gonna like, AI them when we get home.
Just to see.
Anyway guys, thank you so much for getting with us.
Sorry we're on our periods, but if you don't support women,
the arts.
That's on you.
I do have to say there's some artistic stuff
happening in my underwear right now.
We have shows coming up in Toronto and Chicago and New York.
And a new burner phone episode came out with me and Des.
I'm very excited to see the pics.
I can't wait.
And we have no notes hat that launched.
And if you enjoy Gagley Squad, we never tell you guys this,
even though it's so helpful to the pad.
We can subscribe.
We can review, subscribe, and swipe up it.
And leave us a little note.
Tap the link.
I'm not allowed to read them because I'm not allowed to read comments.
I accidentally started responding to people on the Giggly Squad account.
Oh my god, because they never talked about my yellow dragon fruit.
We'll talk about it next time.
Are you sure?
Yeah, next part I'll just tell you about my yellow dragon fruit.
Okay, we love you guys so much and we'll talk to you later.
Bye.
Bye. Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
you