Giggly Squad - Giggling about scammers, cults, and couples costumes

Episode Date: October 26, 2021

Paige is having a problem with her couples costume and Hannah is on her second marriage. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

What's up my giggle mysters whoa I think I think I did that one. You've used that one, yeah. No, you've used that one before. I have one, but I lost it. It's somewhere in my notes. That's okay. I want to say hello from Paige, me, and my pimple on my forehead. Let me see. Let me see it. Yep, sure can.

Does that one hurt? It hurts so bad. I can feel it in my brain. So I'm in Los Angeles. Oh my god, and it's probably so much more annoying having a pimple in LX. There's so much judgey air No, no, no, LA did this to me. I bet I know I wake up and I'm like I'm gonna do a facial

And I try to find a good facial and I found this place so I didn't realize that it's like just the laser Yeah, so I get in and they just start like lasering my shit. And you're like, hello. Oh, I came here to relax. No, they're, yeah, it's not like relaxing. So they're lasering me and they go, yeah, this is going to take a couple of sessions to see the effects, but you, you might get some purging. Yeah. And I'm like, what, I was like, am I going to like puke out of this place? What's happening? And they were like, no, like the toxins are going to come out. So you might have a breakout.. Oh you've never had a purging fate. Oh you've never been on like skin pills. No. Oh yeah it's a whole thing. So you should have texted me before. I've arguably the biggest comedy show of my life tonight. Me and my pimple are meeting Jaylen Oh.

Oh my god. It's kind of fucked up because I've worked really hard to get to this place. My pimple are meeting Jay Leno. Oh my god. It's kind of fucked up because I've worked really hard to get to this place. My pimple shows up last minute. And you have all the attention. Really good skin. Like you never have a pimple. I was glowing.

I was glowing to the point that I'm like, am I pregnant? I was glowing and was like, I just need an upkeep. Like I just want a relaxing facial from flying a lot. You know what I mean? Yeah, like I genuinely don't know the last time, like, if I've ever seen you with like a pimple. I mean forehead pimples brings me back to like getting bullied in sixth grade.

Wow, I'm really sorry. So that's my upkeep. Um. In other news, my skin is positively glowing. It does look good. It does look good. Um, you went to a football game. Are you okay?

Did you lose a bet? What happened? Okay, I don't know what's going on with me, but I don't want to jinx it, but every professional sport I go to, they win. So I know, no. If it's for me or if it's for me. I will say this.

This is now my second professional NFL football game, whatever. When you're watching sports on TV, it's so easy to be like idiots like run like just fucking run the ball When you're in person you're like athletes those are So you see how like big they are and yeah, you see how big they are You see how big the field is like in no situation am I running mad at I think the field Like I'm playing hopscotch. No like I knew it was big But it's just like every time you see it you're like whoa

Yeah, yeah, I want to go to basketball game with you that's legit because those are large We need to get some type of plug that can get us Court side for one game. Because court side is not about the game. Court side is a fashion way for New York City. And I've had this debate in my head. It's been going on for years. Never once have I sat court side, but the debate in my head is do I go for a full heel moment? Or do I go for a cool leather pants sneaker's moment, like a Haley B. Burvive? Or am I going full, like,

like, did you see Adele, Courtside? That's what you go with. Yeah, that's what I see. Adele came in being like, I could own this team. Yeah, she literally looks like the owner of the team. But then part of me is like, to the most successful people, dress. Are they low key? The low key is.

Like, I like how John Mackin row shows up just like in a hoodie. Like, he just went to the bodega. I heard a thing that, I don't know if it's true, that Jerry Seinfeld refuses to wear anything but sneakers because he says he's successful enough to not have to wear anything but sneakers Do you remember when Jerry Seinfeld snubbed Kesha? I vaguely do remember that basically Kesha would like want a hug Seinfeld and he was like no, thank you like, no thank you. Like on K-Rot. They were at like a red carpet, right?

And he was like, no, like fully like, okay crazy fan. Yeah, how did you cure him? I was like, that's Kesha. And he was like, great for her. Don't know. Kesha invented TikTok, okay? So I'm in LA, but you guys, I'm newly in LA. Yeah.

I have not been transformed. I'm still an Angry New Yorker. And I'm walking everywhere with my roly bag, which is social suicide, anywhere, at my backpack. And it says, like, my hotel is seven minutes away. Walking. I'm not calling it Uber. Right.

Little did I know that Los Angeles has these random hills. Yeah, they do, they sure do. Like straight vertical and I start going, I have to take breaks, it's a whole thing. Turn the corner, run into Nima from Shaz. No way. I'm sweating profusely, black on black,

with a rolly bag. Yeah. And he's just standing on side of brunch place and he's like, what are you? He's like what are you? It's a lot to embarrass me but like what are the chances? What are the fucking chances? Not only that he was at that restaurant but standing in my walk line.

No like people I walked into, people would die to run into him or you. And like there has to have been some girl that just was watching this interaction happen, right? So I did, I was walking so long that I did get a couple of DMs. People would be like, hey, I just saw you on last Siannaga. And are you okay? No, LA is weird. And when I tell you I'm disgusting, like disgusting.

And I'm laughing. But Nima did the most Nima thing ever. I was like, I have to take it into story. And he was like, he didn't have his hair like perfectly cloth. Yeah. Because he was at Heather Ray and Tarek Elmousa's wedding the night before. Okay. So he was like, don't put me on the story.

And I was like, okay. The most Nima thing I've ever heard in my life. I love him and he has such main character energy. Main character energy, but also like great side kick to like any girl with main character energy. Like he was on the phone with MJ when I got there. Like he's so supportive. He's just like everyone's like, hype man, I feel like.

Shaws does not portray him accurate. At least not serious. They don't portray him for how hot he is. I don't think people know how tall he is. He is very tall. He's also low-key hilarious, like very, very funny. This is a Nima stand pod. Yeah, we stand him.

He has swag too. He has a good, like, he dressed as well. This is the thing on Shaz, they have enough douchy guys on the cast that they, like, really push him towards nice guy energy. Like, they need one sweet guy. And not that he's not sweet, but he's just not as like... He's not as of a pushover. Exactly. Like he's not.

Oh, God. Oh, there's a lot of dogs here that think they're better than me, which is annoying. So what's the situation now? Will you walk again? It's the question. The only time people walk in a laze to their car and you know your girl doesn't even drive. So we're in a predicament. We're in a kerfuffle. If a question for you because I recently had to read. If you're watching our Patreon I'm... we're pointing. We're having a point down. Since you don't have a driver's license what is your form of identification? Why don't you worry about your own shit? Because pages are phone open, because I need to make a citizen's arrest right now.

No, I have an identification card. So it has your picture on it? Yeah, and I wasn't ready for my picture. Okay, I had to go to the DMV on Friday. Sorry about that. Yeah, but I went in Albany, so it wasn't that bad. Oh, my God. So first of all, I was traumatized by my mother beforehand because I came downstairs and

in true mom fashion, she looked at me and she was like, that's what you're going to wear to go renew your driver's license picture. And I go, Mom. It's neck up Thank your mom is you and you're me It all makes sense now I was like it's literally neck up and she was like yeah, but like oh Man, I thought it was an energy. Oh, yeah It was like yeah, but I'm just not. I thought it was like, it's un-sensurgery. Oh, yeah.

It was like, yeah, but I'm just not loving the whole aura, the whole vibe. Those shoes, yeah, really. She did say that. She was like, I think they're cute, but like, just, she just wasn't having the whole thing, okay? So she's already in my head now. She's like, I mean, it is, it's eight years.

So just be cautious of that. I get in the car, like we're about to pull out of the garage and I go, well, should I put a lash on? She goes, I mean, I was waiting for you to bring it up. I'm like, scary. Where's Savage? Can I know your listening? His habit.

Eric Lee laughing, also being like, people go to therapy about this bitch. I'm like, are you kidding me? So I run upstairs, I throw on a fucking lash. I get to the DMV. I'm up at the counter like, about to take the picture. I take the picture and I'm like, hey, do you think I can see it?

And they're making an Instagram. Yeah, I just want to say they can redo it So like can you go a little higher? Yeah higher? Not as close as I was not loving this angle Do you think we could get like a can you do live photos? Does it have that option? I like to Scroll through it. Do you do births you can you take like 26 of them and then send them to me. Let me edit. I'll send it right back. I send it to my mom too. Do you guys have the tazza app? Yeah.

Do you, um, I think the filter at least put like Paris. Yeah, at least a Paris filter. So I ask the lady, I'm like, can I see it? She's sitting behind full Plexiglass. It's still fully COVID. And she, but there's a mirror behind her. And she's just look in the mirror. Like at the computer screen. And I was like, um, okay, awkward. So my literally up against the Plexiglass. I'm trying to see in the reflection and then she goes, um, any chance your dad's name is Gary and I was just like so taken

back because I'm trying to like see if I need to redo my picture. She clicks off the screen and I was just like, um, yeah, it is, but like, not what we're talking about right now, ma'am. Anyway, it's shown to high school with my dad I have no idea if my pictures right my mom is probably right now. I'm gonna have a horrible ID picture for the next eight years This is just like my stand-up bit about when you spend time with your parents you get a great refresh on things You forgot to bring up in therapy. No, let me tell you I spent 48 hours at home and I was like, thank you for your services. I will be going back.

But it's weird. It depends on your mood. Sometimes parents are the best and then sometimes you're like, you know what, function without you guys. Right. Like, I'm living. I'm making it happen. I'm doing my things. Like some weekends I'll go home and my parents like don't really care about me and then

other weekends, so like do you want to do this? And then we could go to here and we can do this and like want to go to dinner and you're just like, hey, hey, focus for a second. I have to do things all week and like, I have to see people like don't want to see and have conversations I don't want to talk to and like can I just lay on the couch for a full 48 hours like please let me rub the dog's head and fall asleep Oh your dog that you Loki think is fat, so you don't put on insa stories. I don't Loki think he's fat He is fat, but let me tell you something. He's so fat Okay, this is a whole other thing that's happening at my household in Albany

He's like save me save me the dog is so fucking fat He can't even walk his hips give out, okay, and like My dad goes I don't know what's going on. We take him to the vet. They said everything's okay We have him on a diet like we're doing everything we can we like switch my parents love the dog That's what happened. My dad goes, I don't know what's going on. We take them to the vet. They said everything's okay. We have them on a diet. We're doing everything we can. My parents love the dog. They pick the dog.

The dog doesn't even walk anywhere. They carry it everywhere. Then, then I'm sitting on the couch and I see my mom go into the refrigerator and take out cold cuts and just throwing it to the dog. I'm like, what are you doing? She's like, I'm giving the dog dinner. I go, the mommy. The Barone.'s like, I'm giving the dog dinner. I go, the mommy. I go, the bromine.

I go, you're giving him sliced turkey. Like, and you guys are wondering why he is a weight problem. Every time the dog comes from inside, he gets a piece of turkey. She goes, can you give the dog a piece of turkey? He came inside. Phrashew, give him some Phrashew. I'm like, the dog doesn't need a, I go he's playing you guys he literally steps outside comes back in goes right to the refrigerator

I'm like oh my god I can't so I'm gonna make you feel better about your parents right now okay great at least your parents aren't a sports family because when I go home oh that my says, perfect, we have a tea time for 1pm for the family. And when she says tea time, guys, golf is 18 holes. This is a full five hour event. And I'm like, mom, I love you guys, but I'm not trying to give like five hours of my day to playing golf. And she's like, oh, it's okay. Like, you could play tennis if you want, which is another hour and a half event,

which none of it has involved a couch yet. And at what age did you think about emancipation? And then when I just sit on the couch, they're like, hmm, will we just play at 10 hours a golf and you're still sitting on the couch? No, what at what age? I wanna know at what age. Do you no longer love napping because let me tell me something

I don't think I will ever be the kind of adult that's like don't sit on the couch What is up with parents not wanting to just sit on the couch for a second? It is true that meme where it's like date a tired girl because she will never cheat on you Literally the sleepiest. Doesn't he? He's an Ireland right now so there's an eight-hour time difference. So he like goes to bed when I'm waking like it's kind of weird. Yeah. Anyway, I was like, I'll text you after this podcast. I'll give you all the deeds. I know you're going to sleep. You'll wake up with a text from me. Yeah. Let's just say I fell asleep at seven. Yeah. Woke up briefly at 11. Didn't know if it was AM or PM.

Gun to my head if you were like, is it AM or PM? I'd be like, I don't know. I fell right back asleep. Have a call from him being like, what happened? You brought it up that you're going to send me this nice tags. And I'm like, what does he think? I'm cheating on him. I'm part tags and I'm like like he's what does he think I'm cheating on him I'm pardoning and I'm like right I'm mostly I think Craig thinks I'm lying he's like but you woke up from

a nap two hours ago I'm like yeah what of it and nap again the world has flown by during my naps and couldn't be happier Oh god, so that was a nice little catch up other new concept yeah People are very into being so precurious right now Okay, I just kind of like Gwen Stefani's conscious on coupling I have paled around it What did I say Gwen Gwen Stefani, close though. They're about blonde. You guys knew what I meant.

Yeah, they did. So I was like, does what do you think about being so precurious? And he's like, and I'm like, like, going to the bar and not ordering a drink. And he's like, that's been a thing forever. People are just trying to name it something. That's just calls going to the bar and not drinking. Stab rebranding everything, America. Yeah, exactly.

Not everything needs a rebrand. But it made me think about my friend groups and how I have some groups that are like, if you're not partying tonight, I'm not seeing you. Some groups who are like, if you're partying, I'm on a full health kick. It's like Dom. Like your friend Dom and Nika got healthy.

And I feel like you spent less time with her at night because of that, but like, what if we could unite the two? What if it's, there's like a health room of juices and then like another, or like some meditation and then another room for like screaming and drinking? Yes. I, okay, but here's the thing.

If I'm not drinking like for a specific reason, really the only reason I don't drink is sometimes it's like I'm like I'm on antibiotics like I can't drink but like is you're gonna say ambient? I'm like okay definitely not drink on ambient but if you do stay up 15 minutes it's a whole day never mind but just go to sleep as soon as possible. But like if I'm not drinking because of something, I am that person that's not going out because it is painful for me to be around sober people and not be drinking.

So like then I will just be around drunk people. Yeah, that's what it is. Well. Yeah, so I can't be around drunk people if I'm not also drunk or like immediately get mad. So I'm one of those people that's like, if I'm not drinking, like, why do I need to be at a bar? Yeah, my thing when I'm at my drinking is like,

I don't have the energy. Yeah, like I don't care. Have you ever tried flirting when you're sober with a drunk person? Yeah, I literally did that like a couple weekends ago with Craig and he's pep outing me. He kept telling me to stop talking to him because he has a girlfriend and I was like, I know, it's me. He was like, stop talking to me and look at this thing.

What's going on? It was cute but at the same time so annoying. I was like, get in the Uber and show your mouth. And does this sober since he's 19 and I got a little wild and I ordered a sangria. Yeah. How often do you drink? Like never. Yeah. Like once a month you'll have a drink. If I'm socializing you'll have a drink. Got it. One or two. Yeah.

I wouldn't do three, but I'll do two with the girls. Yeah. Yeah. Fuck it. Like I love people who like drinking and getting, I like people who smoke weed. I get along with them. I'm just... Well because your brain level is naturally at, well, we've said this all the time, like

we are simpatico when I'm fucked up. We've had some of our biggest revelations and I've been blacked out. When Paige is not in her right mind, me and Paige are on the same level. Yeah, we're like, hmm, that makes a lot of sense. We've got a lot of sense. Basically, people always think I'm high because I don't stop eating and giggling. Yeah. So I'm just like, literally, Hannah tried to smoke weed one time.

Oh my god, it was like a movie. She started coughing and we were like, it's enough. She's like, I was seeing at the time yelled at me and I was like, this is horrible. She's like, is this how you do it? We're like, absolutely not. It's not how you do it. I absolutely missed my mouth. Like I missed it.

I don't know how to inhale. No, you don't. And people in my stand-up shows will give me weed after and I'm like, no. And you've never smoked a cigarette? No, which is so crazy because you've lived in New York City like in the bar scene. I actually can't smell cigarettes.

It like, like I mean, I'll never be that person on the street that's like, oh my god, don't do that. But like, if I do smell smoke, I do have to turn my head because I will like immediately gag. You ever cough obnoxiously all the time? So I had a sangria. Oh yeah. And it was a large sangria.

It was a heavy poor. And I fall asleep in the drive home with Dez. Like, out, out, 8 p.m. Out. And then we walk in the house. And I get on the couch. Pass out. Out.

And then he said he went up to me and was like, hey, you want to go to bed and I go, no thank you. I'll come to bed. Don't come to bed. Wait, but I actually love that he left you there. There's nothing. I love that he left me there too. There's nothing more annoying than sleeping on the couch

and like your partner being like, come on, come on, come on, come on. like shut the fuck up. Like I love your very respectful also. Yeah. He wakes up to no like movement, like bright, he'll wake up to anything and his excuse he says is because he's a hunter. So he's a monster. Why with your other family?

Because I've never heard you talk about hunting. I only have one who just moves and he's like, oh, so I'm a hunter. No. But it's so annoying because then he like can't length sleep. And the whole thing and I'm like, it's not my fault that I, the air moved and you woke up.

I didn't like, sorry, I'm very literally breathing. You're so like, babe, I'm just a hunter. Yeah, it's in my DNA I'm hunting all the time. And like, that's crazy because you've never made one meal. Anyway, so I know, then he knows. I know I can't go back in the bedroom now. Because then I'll wake him and he'll mess up.

You'll be shot. No, you'll literally get shot. So maybe this thing sometimes where I just fall asleep on the couch. Yeah, I love it. And I want to normalize it. Because you know when you're like just not in the mood to sleep in your bed at night? Dude, when I'm having really bad anxiety, I actually can't sleep in my bed. It's a weird thing. I like sleeping on the couch

Yeah, I've had that too. We're like the couch is safe and like the bed You're almost afraid that if you go in a different place you'll get into like a new mindset Yeah, trying to go to sleep you could have like bad memories and shit come up so you're like Like TV fall asleep. I have never really been that like sweet sweet girlfriend. It's like come to bed Oh my god Come like I'll tell you one time cuz I'm going but like in my head I'm like I love if you stayed on the couch because I get the whole bed like great night for me Like I'm not gonna leave you out there like a dog

But I'm not gonna actively try and get you in the bed because like what am I your mom like no? Stay on the phone have the night noise. No, no. And also between you, butters, not like the biggest fan of death. Yeah. So when we're cuddling on the couch, she looks at me like, don't fucking go over here. Yeah. She's like, you're a hunter? Sure.

I can't. On this bed. She's like, he doesn't know that I'm going to kill him in his sleep. Just waiting for you guys to get in a fight. And then I will save the day. and I will claw his eyes out. Oh my God. Wow, we laughed a lot. Yeah.

Wow. Did you watch Squid Game? Here's the thing. I started it. But I hate watching shows on Netflix that are dubbed over because I legitimately cannot watch the words not match their mouth. But I can't sit and read subtitles because when I'm watching a show, that means I'm also on my phone.

I'm catching up on things. Like I need something that I can look up at, but be listening to and like, and that I just can do it with that. So no, I didn't really watch. So you were too stupid to watch, I just spit squids in. Anyway. You're like my brain. Good night.

I couldn't compute what was happening. So I, no. You on Netflix, have you watched the final season of you? Sure did, that's why I'm the shared note. I put you on Netflix, because I was like, what if she opens? What if she opens the shared note and just as you, like I need to talk about you. I was like, oh my god, I don't want to panic. We have to address some stuff about your shit. Yeah, yeah. What did you think of it? I binge it. Mm-hmm.

Most season threes are not good. So I went into it being like it's gonna suck. Yeah, not gonna lie. I was in it. I like it. I like it. Got me. I love the memes that are like what my boyfriend doesn't answer, the phone or something and it just shows love. I think she's crazy and I love her. Wait, did you watch MADE?

No I haven't, not yet. You should watch it. I'm afraid it's too sad. Like I don't care to watch sad. It's more, or is it, oh no it's heart wrenching. Like I'd rather watch funnier scary. Each episode is sadder than the next. I love what I say.

I don't want to watch sad, but I love murder documentaries. Yeah, you love murder. But I just really like the actress in it, Margaret Qualey. She's a date Pete Davidson. She is dating him? No, she used to. She looks just like Cassie David. He has such a type.

He does have a type. He has like fair skin, like, well, I mean, for Ariana. Ariana, but Ariana has fair skin in real life. Right. She's very tan. Right. She's like my collar.

Yeah, she's Italian. Yeah. She's all of skin. She's just always with a fresh spray tan. Yeah. Do I look like the girl from you because I've been getting harassed with DMs and I don't see it? No way.

Let me look fast. Let me put my hair down. Yeah, you do have that type of look. Joe is such a like they make her the villain and you're like Jo's the real villain. Jo's the real villain. They're both murderers. Like straight up, okay, here's the thing.

Jo always starts it. Jo will cheat on her and they get mad when she murders the girl he's cheating on her with and it's like well don't cheat. Yeah, valid, but here's the thing. Jo's murder. This is like dating when you're 30. Okay, his murder is though. His murder is so quick.

His murder is, and he's so good at cleaning up. He's so efficient. He wants to give them the benefit of the doubt. He's really taking bad people out, and then there have been a few mishaps or it's just like oops We didn't mean for that one love is straight up crazy and has like can't control her anger Joe can always control his You are such a misogynistic bitch. I are such a misogynistic bitch. I felt the feminism leaving my body as I was saying all of that. No, you're right, they're both psycho murders, but I'm proud of you.

Season three, it was still good, however, it got me scared of getting married. Dude, right? No. Every career. Oh, because of the murder? Because they would just just hate each other. Yeah, and so quick. That's how I felt when I was watching sex life. I was like, is this what everyone's doing?

Yeah, I think it's just that marriage is not part of the love story. The love story is before you get married, I think. And then marriage is the next world job. Well, according to my calculations. is before you get married, I think. And then marriage is the nextable job. Well, according to like my calculations, I'm being in a relationship for four days. No, I feel like from everything I've like watched, we honestly, we should like have some married couples on the pod because I'd love to know.

I honestly feel like it goes in waves. Like you know how people always talk about like the seven year itch when like most people if they're gonna get divorced, they do it at seven years. Here's where it's good. You're actually outsmarting the system because des is older than you. And so like he's not gonna change, like he's sat in his ways. This is him. You know, where I feel like if you get married change, like he's setting his ways. This is him, you know? Oh, this is him. Where I feel like if you get married younger, like you could really change. Like you could just have some type of epiphany

where you're just like, I hate this person and like I'm leaving, which is like what I do in all my relationships. But. I almost feel like this is my second marriage. I feel like that for you too, which I love that for you. Ha ha ha ha never been married before but I feel like he could have. You're on your second marriage. Oh my god. You live in Beverly Hills. You're on your second marriage.

You're just running into famous people on the street. Everyone thinks you're a new up-and-coming actress, you told us in the beginning of the pod you didn't turn LA. You've literally been there two days and I don't even know you. There was a puddle with dyed hair. I'm sure there was. Enough to me. And I was like, bitch, I was on a cable TV network. Shut the fuck up. On the daily, on a daily basis. I'm not kidding way more than I should I think about that little 60 Fashion week. I think she blocked me on Instagram, but um Taylor and I can't wait for you to meet her because you'll be like this is what you're gonna be when you grow up

I'm like you're my daughter. I'm abducting you But also with you like she has a kid, notice the kid disappears for like seven episodes. I'm like, who's watching the kid? I mean, they did not call the baby sitter one time. And I do have, oh, I have one issue. Okay. With the moon, I don't want, this isn't really a giveaway,

but like the teenage kid she's hooking up with. Yeah. Would you fuck him? No. Would you? give away but like the teenage kid she's hooking up with yeah would you fuck him no would you mean mean either but he's giving me like Timothy Schemele type by yeah but my issue is he sees these these these people trapped Timothy Chevrolet trapped in a box in a basement and his first instinct is to search for a key. Why do you call 911? Because Hannah, it's a television show So it's not real and so they're not gonna do like the normal thing. Wait, do you know that I think they're dating in real life?

Love and I got love and his name's Theo, right? Yeah, yeah You know, I think's hot is the neighbor. The crazy one? Wait, the dad. Yeah. OK, Zadi vibes. Obviously he's my favorite. All day.

I'm like, wait, why aren't we focusing the show more on him and his love life? I was so into him. Very into him. I'm so into him. Very into him. I'm not into like the swinging couple though. Are you into Joe? No, I'm really not. He's so not my tie up.

He's, there's some, he's too like scrawny for me. Yeah, like his waist would look better in a wrap dress than mine. Yeah. Like his bone structure a wrap dress than mine Like his bone structure is more defined than mine and I can't have cheek bones are snatched and I don't need that I have everyone actually on that show no one's like Overwhelmingly hot which I kind of like because you know those shows in the CW that are just a ton of models like Pretending to act. I can't fucking do this. I can take this seriously.

So right. I take them more seriously as actors if they're not as good. We, that's the reverse, pretty privilege. We're changing mankind, Tana. I don't know. So in my comedy shows, I've been saying that I'm a reality TV six, but that I'm a stand-up comedy 17.

Ooh, thank you. And people have been laughing. And I've realized, I don't know if that's a good thing. I think I've been laughing. You know when you're like that kind of hurt? You're like, but I did this to myself. You laughed really quickly. Yeah, you laughed instantaneously.

Don't love that. I don't love it. I say I have reversed body dysmorphia where I think I'm hotter than I am And when people laugh I straight up and like I need to cry Okay, I don't think you think you're hotter than you are you are very pretty I will say as your friend though going anywhere Going anywhere with you you think that every guy wants to fuck you and I'm like That's literally the barista his job is to hand you your coffee, he doesn't want to have sex with him.

I think he's gay, actually. I'm like, you actively think that everyone's flirting. I'm like, he's literally driving the Uber, he asked if we needed a like tissue like he's not trying to get in your pants You know this I think it's cuz when I make people laugh I'm like Done charmed yeah the shoes off them Think like every girl wants to fuck me. No, I get that I get that if I get like. If you know when you're at a dinner party or you're at a party or something, and more than three people laugh, you're kind of like, got these people in the bag, who else can I go impress with this thing? Like, if you're sitting next to a model, and you crack a joke,

and the guy laughs, and the model laughs,. I'm like we're having a threesome True except I've been at many a dinner party with like my guy friends and they are sitting next to a model And I'm listening to their conversation and my guy friends will be laughing and I'll look over and be like Now you know that shit was not funny I'm like page But I feel like 90% of confidence is believing that everyone wants to fuck you. I have said this before and I literally live by it. If you walk into a room and you legitimately think

that you are the hottest person in the room, like just like in your head, like just as you're walking in, like I'm so fucking hot, there is an energy that like it gives off to people and like they then think that you are the hottest person. Like it just- A thousand percent of the whole psychology. Yeah. Instead of a podcast, we should have literally started a party circuit where we just were hired for parties and we like worked the room. You know what, I don't think the universe was ready for us to have a dating show together and that's why we were never single at the same time.

We were good together though, we were good. Okay, also, don't freak out. Okay. But I just interviewed for Burning and Hell, India, Oxenberg, from the next CM cult. Oh my god, is this your first cult person page I was pedaling myself like I was like I didn't know how to say I don't want to be like I love cult but like I wanted to be like I'm wait how do you say that like hey just I love cult because it's not like you can be like hey I love cults, because it's not like you can be like, hey, I love tonnets. I hate cults, I hate cults.

I hate cults, but I'm pro. Yeah, okay. And have you watched the vow or seduced either of them? Wait, you did make me watch one of them. I can't remember which one, but I have seen, I know about this particular cult. It's based in Albany, so who knows? The kind of tea that you forget if you wanted.

I did watch it just in case there was someone in the background that I was like, hey, I know that person. Like I wanted to say. Yes. So, Des called me before and he was like, look, I know you like to make your little jokes, but this is a very sensitive thing that this girl's been through. Be careful. Don't make it about you. So I'm trying to act like tennis was a cult. Like this is about her and her experiences. And I'm like, yes.

And you're like, okay, second husband, keep your opinion, steer yourself, or we'll replace you. See ya. Oh my God, I love calling does second. Wait, I love it too. And this is never going away. Second husband. And he's jealous of my first.

We don't know who he is. Yeah. It makes it even better. Why? Second husband? And he's jealous of my first. We don't know who he is. It makes it even better. We won't tell him who it is. I'm your business. We don't talk about the past. OK, so I still love with her first husband. He died.

Cautation. That's right. Yeah. I murdered him. So I walk in to record. And India's not there yet. And there's the owner of this podcast studio and I was like what a cool name India oh yeah it's like hot yeah and then you just you have to be interesting

if your name's India so you must I was like yeah I'm recording I'm waiting for my guest and he's like oh what's the like pod about and I was like she was an occult. And he looks at me, no expression, he goes me too. And I was like, okay, LA. Oh! I was like, what? And he's like, yeah, my parents grew up in a cult, like whatever. What cult did he have out of it now?

What? I forget, it was like the like, imagine if he didn't say I'm out of it now and he was like, you wanna hear about it? Like, what are you? Like, Iana, I'm very worried that one day you will call me and be like, I'm moving to like the bush people. Like, or something.

I'm very open about, I will fall for a cult someday. But we sit down, Indie gets there and she's immediately like, create personality joking and I realize like, I can make a joke and I'm like India I have to say because she was on this cult for seven years. She worked away up. She how old is she? It was from 19 to like 26 damn Ma and I was like India. I just have to say that you Crush being in a cult like you you were on the best cult You were on the best cult, my friend. And she started dying laughing, but I'm like,

think about it. You pushed through so much shit. And she's like, my mom laughed about that too. I know it wasn't great. I was in a cult, but I did my best in the cult. I love when I fucking love moms. They're like, honey. But when her mom saved her, you have to watch

the next one, mom, who would introduce her to it. because they're like LA people trying to find a purpose yeah the mom Wasn't that into it and then realized her daughter in a cult But the cult told her your mom's evil don't talk to your mom and the mom started going to the media I was like my daughter's brainwashed and India keeps being like don't you're being crazy mom leave me alone Oh my God. It's her mom who brought the attention to the police, who finally got the cult leader under arrest, and India finally heard from a USB drive,

the cult leader basically talking about his plan to manipulate these women. And finally, now her relationship with her mom is so much deeper, because her mom literally saved her life. This thing with cult is like, if you're a cult leader, are you just so nervous every single day that you're gonna get caught?

Like this is why I get, this is back to tax evasion. Like if you're doing something illegal, aren't you nervous every single second of your life that you're gonna get caught? See you're doing it wrong. You can't think how they would think because they don't think like you They're like straight up Sociopaths. Yeah, I guess that's right. So because part of me I was like India once you found out that like it starts as an executive success program

It's literally like imagine you didn't really know what's going on with your life And it's like oh, it's an executive success program that helps you learn how to become a better human. Exactly. Exactly. It's how she's like compared a lot of woo woo stuff in LA. It was very like straight forward. Yeah. And you have to like, it took a journey before she got to this final like really fucked up

part. And I'm like, isn't it crazy that he had to go through like all these things to get you where he wanted to and she's like, yeah, but he doesn't think like us. And then I was like, India, do you believe in good people are good or bad? Because I tried to tell myself that everyone's good. They just like have to deal with stuff. Yeah. And she was like, no, people are bad.

That's crazy. Like straight up evil. Yeah. They're straight up evil people. Which is so scary. And then I was like, are you practicing forgiveness with so scary and then I was like are you practicing for giv-ness with These people and she was like you have to And I'm like oh that's some fucking deep shit. Where's that guy now?

In jail. He's in jail. Oh My god, and he was like 5 5 and I but also okay that is also crazy because how is he banging all of them? and I'm not. But also, okay, that is also crazy because how is he banging all of them? That's also a thing. He can just bang all these women. It took years of grooming and coaxing and manipulating and to the point that they felt like they were no one without his leadership. I give away this happen in Albany.

Oh great for us. I believe it. But the point is, culture actually just like a toxic boyfriend. Because no one deliberately joins a cult. No one deliberately dates a bad dude. Right. But your love bombed in cults, then they take, you know how toxic guys take your friends away, they take your family away, and then all you see is them,

then they break you down, tell you you're nothing without them. It's literally what cult does. Like, it's really not that crazy. It's very tech-book. Yeah, cults are just like college in 101. Yeah. And this cult in particular, they weren't wearing crazy outfits or colors.

It is nutty. Like, because anytime you talk to a girl who's been in any type of abusive relationship, everyone's story pretty much has the same kind of timeline. It's like, well, he was amazing. We were great. And then all of a sudden, he did one thing. And I was like, eh.

And then it just, it's like all the same. But my thing is, how do these narcissists and sociopaths and psychopaths all know how to do it the same way? Like, is there a book, I guess, to know? Is there a book that they're all reading that like they haven't let us in on? I guess that they just know humanity knows like I have to get them to like really trust me and then I have to break them down to get the like pleasure I don't fucking know but basically there are scary people in this world. I mean that is like we talked about the British Murphy documentary right yeah we talked about it. I mean he was let that's him. He's just book. Yeah he was just so good at it. It's a good word, called Simon. Yeah. I finished it.

It was really good. Do you know about Anna Delvie? Yeah, the girl that was like pretended she was an ares. Yeah. So there's this thing on HBO Max called Generation Hustle, where it shows all these different scam artists things. And I watched the one on a Delvie. Wait, I need to watch it.

I'm literally gonna watch it tonight. Is it neat? It's like documentary style or it's like active. Yeah, okay. It's documentary style. It's so good because she basically, okay, what would you do? Page.

I'm doing really well. I'm crushing it. I have so much money. I am a Germanerous. Nobody's here. Do you wanna come to me with me to Morocco? I'll pay for the trip. Like six days it'll be so dope. Yes, I'm coming. Like I'm coming. Hell yes. Okay, so we get there. We're sitting down to dinner. Oh my God. My card isn't working.

Can you get this dinner? Then yeah, you pick up the dinner. Then the security comes and goes, your card is bouncing. And I go, Paige, this is just so embarrassing. It's just so embarrassing. Something must have gotten fucked up with my wiring from Germany. Can you cover this?

And I will get you back for sure. Please. Oh my god, I feel like I'm entering a cult, but yes, then I would do it. Like if this is my fine, sorry, I'm so embarrassed. Yeah, so much. I love this roleplay we're doing. This is kinda hot.

We're in Morocco too. It's like, it's 70 grand by the way. I mean, I don't have that. I feel like you just did a big ad on your... I'm like, take this one up. I feel like I don't know. Yeah, so I, okay. Okay, I got the trip.

And we have so much fun, so much fun. Okay, I love you. I'll get you the money ASAP. You never get the money for me. I never hear from you again. You'll text me, and I'll be like, oh my God, it's coming. It's coming. you the money ASAP. You never get the money for me. I never hear from you again. You'll text me now, be like, oh my God, it's coming, it's coming. And then eventually you just realize you're never gonna get it.

Okay. It's okay. If that's my friend, yeah, that's fucking crazy, I'm livid, okay? And you're not doing that well. Like, you're living paycheck to me. Right, like, I need that money. I would be so angry if that's me on the outside looking in What a fucking what a fucking hustler, but yeah, like I can't knock this girl's hustle like I genuinely can't like that To have the goal to do that is crazy. That's like a different part of your brain and She's doing this to a bunch of hotels.

I knew she was doing it at, what is that hotel that that's attached to? There's this place called the Blonde, that like in New York City that I used to go to literally every Friday and Saturday night. The bouncer hated me. It's a whole thing. Anywho, the Howard Hotel. It's attached to the Howard Hotel. It was the most fun place, and that's where she would live and scam them. Anyway. So what she do is she live in a place for a month,

and she'd owe 20 grand. Where isn't she from a farm in the Midwest? Or something crazy? She's from Russia. Oh, that's terrifying. That's immediately terrifying. It's like the Midwest, but scarier. So she would just leave the hotel. So the friend calls the police and is like, my friend fucked me. My friend stole money from me. And then they go, oh my gosh, we have a lot of open cases about this woman. So how much money did she ultimately get away with it

in her, all of her scamming in New York? I'm not sure, Excess, exactly, but it was like hundreds of thousands of dollars. But it's funny, because her lawyer had your perspective where the lawyer was like, so she's smart. And she's like, so she tricked you. Like, no, yeah, because it's just... And she had a lot of, I think, like, fake followers

on Instagram, and she also was getting these people to invest into this, like, project. She was starting, she was trying to start, like, a fake Soho house. Yes, exactly. So she was really good at being confident. And apparently she was a bitch. Like she would just be mean to people.

Yeah. And people like respect to that. There was another thing too, where someone was like, she wasn't like the prettiest girl, but like she wasn't like ugly, but you wouldn't be like, damn, she's so hot. But like walking into a room, people were like enamored by her.

And I forget, like, if it was was a friend or a friend of a friend, whatever, I read it in that big, the cut to a huge article about it. Yeah. So she's, but I think she did what she wanted to do, which is like, So now where is she? She and Jail.

She's in jail. Jail. And she's young too, right? I guess she gets out. When does she get out? In her 20s, I think. Yeah, I feel like when she did all this, right? I guess she gets out. When does she get out? In her 20s I think. Yeah, I feel like when she did all this, she was only like 26.

Yeah. Wait, that is crazy. Like that's crazy. New York City is so nuts. When I was like pulling into New York City today with my brother, and like we weren't even in Times Square. And someone was just like, and it is like Halloween time, whatever, but someone was just walking down the street and like a Captain America costume. And like I didn't even in Times Square. And someone was just like, and it is like Halloween time, whatever.

But someone was just walking down the street and like a Captain America costume. And like, I didn't think anything of it. I actually didn't even comment on it. And my brother was like, this is a weird place. And I was like that. At least he's dressed. I'd be like, go back to all of them.

And he put your fucking cults, OK? If you don't want a little superhero costume. He's saving the city. How about you say thank you. He's protecting us. My question is when did Halloween become a two week thing? No, I can't. I can't. I actually do this before or is it because like we missed Halloween last year kind of? I think it's your turn. I think it's your turn.

I think it's your turn. I think it's your turn. I think it's your turn. I think it's your turn. I think it's your turn. I think it's your turn. I think it's your turn. I think it's your turn.

I think it's your turn. I think it's your turn. I think it's your turn. I think it's your turn. I think it's your turn. I think it's your turn. I think it's your turn. I think it's your turn.

I think it's your turn. I think it's your turn. I think it's your turn. I think it's your turn. I think it's your turn. I think it's your turn. I think it's your turn. I think it's your turn. I think it's your turn. I think it's your turn. I think it's your turn. I think it's your turn. I think it's your turn. I'm a couple and I don't have a costume because getting a guy to do any type of decision is like the worst.

You would literally have to buy it and like dress him up. And no, that's what I'm trying to do, but I can't even get it text being like, yeah. But they're like a puppy, yeah. They're like a puppy, you have to like, get them. I have to like shake keys and like, you want to be pirates? No. So you have to get them a treat. You have to get a matri- Literally Um, anyhow, I think I'm gonna be flying

Good for you. Good for honestly. I did it on purpose. Yeah Hannah good for you. Sunday and my I have people throwing a party on Saturday, but it isn't Jersey City. Oh Sorry People throwing a party on Saturday, but it isn't Jersey City. Ooh, sorry. But I'm going to be in LA. I was going to be Guy Fieri. I would love if you did do that though at some point. Do you want to know what's fucked up for a second? I was like, I'm going to be in LA.

So let my mom see you. Your mom, the shit she probably wants to say to me. Or she's just like, oh, Hannah., for a second I wanted to just buy it to take a picture. Yeah. But then I was like, I can't, I'm not paying $200 on Amazon for a photo. The craziest thing too is like, I've always wanted to do

like really cool couples costumes. Now like the one year I have a boyfriend, I can't stop thinking of like, oh, if I was single, I would have been this. Oh my god, that's life. What were you going to be if you were single? I had so many that now I can't remember, but I, because, and also here's another thing. This is just pure privilege as well. There's so many good Halloween costumes for Blons. It's like so many. Like every time I'm scrolling, I'm like, well, I don't wanna wear a blonde wig.

Yeah, all we have is like, Angelina Jolie and Tomb Raider. I'm with it. I'm over it. Like, it was all we had. I wanted to be Mr. and Mrs. Smith. Craig said, now. I was like, I don't have any. and Mrs. Smith. Craig said no. I was like, I don't have any more brunette outfits. Why can't he be MGK?

That would be so funny. Okay, well here's, I will let the gigglers in on this. He texted me earlier today and he said, do you want to be the motley crew? And I was like, oh, like punk rock people? And he was like, yeah. So he thinks we're being punk rock people. We're being Travis and Courtney. I just haven't told them yet. I don't know.

Because in no world is Paige Motley crew. No, I'm like, I'm literally gonna be like, okay, I'm in charge of everything. Put this out for now. I'm to wear a beanie. I'm not cool. I'm not cool. I'm not telling him until the picture is on my Instagram story

He thinks we are punk rock people we are Sink or we are MGK and Megan Fox. He's not gonna know It's better for him. It's better this way He's gonna know he's not gonna know. He's gonna tell him literally who's gonna tell him he thinks Okay, cuz he didn't want to like be them. He's not gonna know. He's gonna tell him. Literally, who's gonna tell him? He thinks, okay. Because he didn't want to like, be them. He was like, no, it's so weird. Like why would we dress up as them?

And I was like, okay, we'll be punk rock people. I think Desi's too old for Halloween. Second husband's usually are. Yeah. I love this second husband bit we have. But yeah, with it. The fun thing thing about does is he's like a godfather of like five children. Yeah. So he kind of has other families.

Yeah. I kind of tell myself he's just like seeing his other family in Ireland. I'm like give my best. Wait. I joke about a secret family all the time. I'm like, I know you've a secret family in Ireland. Yeah. I'm wondering where the fuck you are. Go back. Tell her what you're ever after tell her. Hannah, we can't put this in that. It's here because you know how we are with manifesting. If you end up on a documentary one day about like,

men with secret families. He's like a politician in Ireland. Why do you think I do us weekly interviews? So that his secret family fucking knows. Because if there's a girl out there that needs saving, she's gonna read it through us weekly. Oh my gosh. I actually like would love to have a documentary about me. I just don't know what it's gonna be about yet and I'm kind of scared. Okay, well hopefully it put some crazy shunt to the universe today. Yeah, hopefully it's not a documentary. A documentary about anything you like watching

documentaries on because then we're gonna be in a real fucking pickle. So we, do we have any front page news? We're at an hour. Oh my God. Well, we love you guys so much. We are working on new locations to have a gigley squad live show. We're so excited. Um, I put hair and makeup for our Philly one. We love that. I love that. I was so excited about it. I'm so excited. We're gonna we're gonna look fly. Hopefully this pimple like comes the fuck down. Do you have any advice? I have to be on stage in two hours. Not really. She's okay. No, guys.

But you do have to hold the link. You don't travel with pimple cream. I put toothpaste on it. Put like a cold, compressed on it right now. Maybe the swelling will go down a little. Thanks, babe. Oh, take some Advil too, if it hurts. That'll make the swelling go down. Okay, amazing, because my whole body hurts always.

We love you guys so much. Thank you for giggling with us today. Yeah, thanks for giggling with us. See you next time. Bye. Thank you so much. Thank you for giggling with us today. Thanks for giggling with us. See you next time. Bye!