Giggly Squad - Giggling about spring trends, AirPods, and eggs
Episode Date: April 2, 2024Paige finds out some shocking information about Hannah that derails the entire pod. SIGN UP FOR OUR NEWSLETTER HERE Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information....
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What's up gigglers? Gary, fix your wifi. Manifest that shit. We can't be managed.
I mean the day just got away from me. What's up my dick guzzling gigglers?
That's after Easter Sunday, Jesus just rose yesterday.
But like, April Fools being today
makes me feel like it was a bit.
Like was Jesus coming back a bit?
And people didn't realize it was April Fools
and then they kept telling each generation
that he really did it when he was like,
guys it was a joke, like obviously.
Or let's think of like Mary Magdalene being like,
he's gone, he's gone, like all of her friends
probably being like, okay, you're like being
so dramatic now, you gotta let it go.
He was never gonna marry you.
Or the fact that Mary was like,
oh I got pregnant by God, and it's like,
you slept with everyone in the town.
Wait, I saw a meme the other day,
and it was like, imagine if you only knew
Jesus professionally.
And it said, it's like imagine if you only knew Jesus professionally
And it said
It's like this guy to his wife. He's like honey. They crucified our carpet
And he had beautiful hair
Was it Rory Scoville? Oh my god. It was two seconds in and I can't breathe. It might have been Sarah Silverman. Oh fuck, I forget, but they were just talking about,
I think it was Worry Scoville on HBO.
He was talking about how people making God hot.
It's like, so you wanna fuck God?
Why would you paint him hot?
Like a zaddy?
Why is God a zaddy?
It's like, okay, he's literally ripped.
And it's like.
Jesus too, was Jesus hot?
Jesus 2024 would 100% be wearing rings.
Like I feel like a lot of rings,
he'd keep the long hair.
Yeah, he'd throw them into a bun.
Like today's Jesus would be different.
He'd be a fuck boy.
Jesus is a fuck boy.
Jesus was getting people...
Well, Jesus, actually, I'm gonna be honest. I don't really know what happened.
Okay. Some people say
JVN looks like Jesus. Oh yeah. Jesus is just JVN.
That one really got ya. He parted the middle part C. Can I tell you something? I don't go anywhere without my Stanley anymore
I actually have been drinking from my Stanley too
But only when my mom's around to make sure it gets clean cuz that shit no cultivates
Well, here's the other thing there's all these people being like you got to wash it every single day
Yeah, fuck no, and I wash this is a very single day. I'm not drinking straight-up water. I'm putting putting meo drinks, meo, I'm putting tea in it,
I'm putting a noom flavor thing,
I'll put every fucking flavor,
so then it starts to become a juice.
A juice or like a greenhouse.
It's a greenhouse of bacteria.
And so then.
It starts blending, I mix it.
Yeah, it blends.
I feel like there's two types of people mm-hmm people who
go to Panera
And they get their cup
Yeah, either you go. I am like a dr. Pepper girl or like I'm a lemonade girl
Yeah, or the ones that are go. I'm gonna fuck my shit up right now, and I'm gonna go with vibes
Yeah, and you're, you start putting the lemonade
and you go, but I need a little bit of Powerade.
But what about a little spice?
I feel like there's a moment in your youth
where you learn that like, oh, you could do all of them
and no one's gonna yell at you.
And that sometimes there's a reason
that they're not all together.
And that's called adversity and learning and growing.
My favorite was then giving it to someone
being like, try it and guess what I put in it.
Like guess what is in there.
That's a really fun game.
We should do that at parties.
I was a little worried about this week
because the only notes we had,
I wrote, fuck April Fools,
and Paige wrote, I missed Giggly this week.
I have to say.
Because sometimes during my week something will happen Pedro, I miss Giggly this week.
I have to say. Sometimes during my week, something will happen,
and I'll be like, where's my microphone?
Like, I want to pod about this.
And like, some weeks are harder than others.
Well, when I feel like the Gigglers haven't heard what's going on.
Yeah, like we haven't even talked about the girls getting punched in the head.
Let's talk. Like, I... it literally rattled me for an entire week.
I didn't say anything about it on social media because like I...
Because you didn't get punched.
I didn't get punched in the head.
I didn't want to, again, make it about me.
But I had so many things.
I was one, enraged, and two, I will die for New York City.
But this is the first time in 10 years
that I felt scared walking somewhere during the day.
I was a little annoyed with New York City
because New Yorkers, especially since 9-11 growing up,
you could say whatever you want about them,
but when someone needs help,
New Yorkers come to the rescue.
You ever, someone kind of faints on a subway,
who's the doctor?
The doctor, that's how New Yorkers are.
So I understand it must have been like busy and stuff,
but part of me is like,
why did no one beat that guy's ass?
I do have to say,
there's so many funny quality TikToks
that the girlies were making.
They took their Stanley and they were like,
I'ma beat someone's ass.
I do have to say, I woke up and I was not scared.
I said, I've been waiting my whole life
to have a physical altercation with a man.
And I'm ready.
You like wish that he would.
I wish you fucking would.
1-800-TRY-ME.
I saw so many TikToks of girls being like,
giving like their subway route to get to them,
to like punch them in the head,
not these like young, like 20 year old girls
in the West Village.
Wait, so girls are sacrificing themselves?
Yeah, they're like, why don't you come here?
She's like, what tribe are you in?
One of the girls was like coming to Park Slope, Brooklyn.
And I was like, oh my God, Hannah Lipson?
If you had to pick, if like a situation happened,
you would say your fight, not flight.
I'm, when it comes to a man, I'm fight.
When a girl I say, you're having a hard day, I'm leaving.
I said, you work it out with yourself.
I feel like there's gotta be a moment of like shock first.
Well, I was getting upset
cause they were gaslighting that girls were like.
No, the New York Times.
The New York fucking Times was like,
girls who are distracted on their phones getting punched.
First of all, these girls are working.
Something's going on.
These girls are social media managers, influencers.
They're fucking, they're working.
They're doctors working on their phone,
responding to emails.
No, the headline was like, our women,
it didn't say the word hysterical,
but it might as well have inducing anxiety on the internet.
And it was like, no, men are punching them in the head.
It's like women are gossiping about possible men
like punching them, because they're on their phones.
And it's like, no, women are spreading awareness.
Also, the women haven't done shit.
The men have gone rogue and are punching women.
And then I thought about this even deeper.
And I said-
The New York Times is on my list.
They're on my list.
But New York Times, we actually mean New York Times.
We don't mean TikTok.
No, we mean the literal New York Times.
The literal New York Times for the first time ever.
The publication.
Were the men in New York kind of keeping an eye out though?
Like, okay, if someone's gonna punch a girl,
like I'll defend them.
We're hopping in for sure.
But I feel like I'm-
Chris, your hair is giving such a quaff today and such
volume that's high respect yeah I appreciate that welcome I actually made
Craig walk me to Amazon the other day you know what else is so crazy to think
about if the roles were reversed and I walked by a woman punching a guy in the
head I'm like he bet he definitely did it What did he do? He definitely did it
I'll be like tag me in, tag me in, I'll start fucking
And another thing
Imagine there was a woman
going around punching men in the city
people would be like
Someone would be like
where are Paige and Hannah at this exact
moment
Someone would be like oh Paige finally snapped
Does she have very long fingers? Oh my god.
If you hear that men in New York City are getting poked in the eye,
it was me. Actually I do have to say I was going through a particular hard time
with men and I was walking on the city with Ashley Heseltime
who's a
tall, very independent strong woman, and I was with her and it was dark and we were
leaving a comedy club and there were these two really drunk guys behind us
and they were kind of like saying stuff to us and we both got a little
uncomfortable. I go, Ashley? She's like, should we like, what should we do? And I was
like, I fucking dare them. I fucking dare them. And she was like, who are you right now?
And I go, fucking, I will defend you.
I said, I want to punch a frat guy in the face
for so fucking long.
Give me an excuse.
Give me a reason.
I fucking dare.
Like, you know the motherly strength of like,
that's how I felt with Ashley.
I was like, if he fucking does one thing,
I don't know where the power's gonna come,
but I'm gonna do the, I'm gonna stab him in the eye.
I'm gonna kick him in the balls. I'm gonna kick him in the balls,
I'm gonna kick him in the shin.
See, when it comes to physicality,
I feel like I get nervous,
but when it comes to fighting,
like if someone's behind a counter,
then I can verbally fight.
See, I'm only physical.
I do have to say I've never gotten
in one physical altercation in my life.
But I like to say it's because I think people are like,
she's fucking sturdy, like strong.
Like no one in school was fucking with me
because they could tell that I...
I've also never been in a physical altercation.
I've been hit, but I've never done anything back.
But we both have brothers.
But this is the thing, I understand men are stronger.
I play dirty.
Same.
I play dirty.
I'll pretend I'm dead.
No, I'm.
Then I'll slip on them.
I'm slimy.
I'm squirrely.
Like I'll get out of there.
I'll be like, ow, ow, that was too much.
And then I'll jump in.
Yeah, I'm a younger sister.
I'm literally trained to get out of the most insane maneuvers,
yell for my mom, and walk away.
Like that's my-
Do you know when you just like get in a crouch position
where they can't really get you,
and then they finally leave and then you jump,
and you do the fake punch, you like fake punch them.
I've never-
Okay, you and Daniel had like a really intense childhood.
Gary would just honestly beat me so badly
that I couldn't even like reach him.
Like there was one time where he beat me so badly,
my mom legit thought I had a concussion.
Like he just beat me with a pillow
for like 20 minutes straight and I just laid there.
And I was like, this is how I go, you know?
It was right when The Rock became famous
and guess who knew all the moves?
My brother.
So my brother is younger than me
and I think something happened
where he started to go through puberty
and he decided he wanted to learn MMA.
Okay, they all know.
Every guy has to go through an MMA fight.
It's like if you just told your mom
what was bothering you at that age, she probably could
have helped.
You don't have to get into a cage.
The thing Finn will do to not go to therapy.
Now it's insanity.
Actually, a really interesting parenting lesson that my mom did.
My brother was 17 years old.
He's now like, he's a business man, successful grown adult.
He's a father. 17 years old, he goes,
Mom, I wanna get a tattoo of Chinese characters on my neck.
Okay.
So that's every mom's nightmare,
is a neck tattoo of a language you don't speak.
Yeah.
But instead of being like, no, she goes,
you know what, let's wait till you're 18,
and we'll talk about it.
And by the time-
I thought she was gonna say, you know what,
I'll get one too.
Because that would have been a great...
Well, now he says they have the ones that fade,
which is like, I recommend,
but like, think about that time of his life
that would have been so fucking cool.
You could get a corporate job.
It would have been cool for all three seconds.
Chris, did you want one of those too?
I got like Chinese letters on my neck now.
Or just a tattoo in general.
Oh, kinda, yeah. I didn't have one picked out.
Yeah.
That's all we're going to say.
I really don't know.
No matter what he said, I wanted to do that.
Daniel just like didn't get it.
But yeah, he was doing this Tae Kwon Do shit.
Yep.
And MMA and stuff.
And he would have me like fight him,
would like show him, show me what he learned in class.
But I would like grab his hand and be like, no,
you have to grab it this way.
Because it was like certain moves. And I'm like, you already lost. Like I would grab his hand and be like, no, you have to grab it this way. Because it was certain moves and I'm like,
you already lost, I'm not grabbing your hand that way.
You're gonna be on the subway and be like,
sir, actually if you could grab the other way,
that's how I know my move.
He's like, can you move your arm across?
Because that's how I flip you.
But then he learned how to make people,
he could knock you out by pressing a certain thing
in your neck or something.
And that's when I was like,
okay, maybe I should be nicer to him.
I feel like in that situation,
I legitimately would be like Cher from Clueless.
Like if I'm in a good outfit,
I'd be like, are you fucking kidding?
Like I'm not getting messy for your childish bullshit.
But also, I do wanna say, in all seriousness,
the girls that got punched in the head,
I would throw myself in front of a bus for you.
Like, if I was there.
Yeah, we love you so much.
It is serious trauma, walking outside
and being assaulted like that.
No, it is scary.
Like, it's something, they're gonna have to-
Like, I definitely looked around a lot more
in the past couple of days, like walking.
But I will say, too, I never walk with headphones on.
I've never done that.
Which brings me actually to a great segue.
I have a question for you.
And no shade, no hate.
That's perfect.
I don't have AirPods.
Is that what you're asking?
No, but let's absolutely circle back to that
because that's insane.
Continue.
That's insane. When. That's insane.
When someone says, when an artist,
a musical artist puts out their art,
an album if you will,
when someone says to you,
oh my God, have you listened to the new So-and-so album?
What's your answer?
Okay, so I've never ever done this in my life
until Ariana Grande,
because I had a six hour drive to West Virginia.
That was the only time, like,
for everyone who's listened to the Beyonce album,
I want to, but like, things come up.
And by things, I mean, not a lot of things, but like.
And also, what am I just putting in on my Spotify,
sitting there and listening?
No, I'm not going about my day.
That's exactly what happened.
I go, I wanna listen to it, what can I do
while listening to it?
And I go, well, I can't watch TV. I go, I want to listen to it. What can I do while listening to it? I go, well, I can't watch TV.
So I guess I can't listen to it.
No, because that's my only thing too.
I'm watching TV on mute.
But here's another thing that's also a little bit weird,
I think about me that the average person would also think.
I'm not a huge music person.
Like in general.
Like I only knew music one, cause I had an older brother and two, like I lived in music person. Like in general. Like I only knew music one,
because I had an older brother,
and two, like I lived in the suburbs.
So like what was on the radio I knew.
But like I don't, I never go to Spotify.
Like I never listen to music I feel like.
What about like when you're getting ready?
No, I'm usually like on the phone with someone or like.
Who?
My mom. No, you'm usually like on the phone with someone or like my mom
No, you know what I realized in my therapy that like ice ice
But no certain music really does help you get out of your own head where when I wake up in the hotel room at like 7
PM and I have a show at 8 p.m
Yeah, I need a blast like rap and it puts me in a new mindset.
Or like, it is fun to pretend you're in a movie
when you're walking and you put something on
and you think you're in that scene where it's like,
she finally figured out her life.
I feel like that's a form of mental illness.
True, you know for sure.
When you're watching condensation drip out the window
and you're just like, and that's life and she knows what's going on now
and she doesn't care about her past
I would say the only time I really listen to a song
I don't listen to sad songs
I think people who listen to sad songs are crazy
I would say maybe when I'm in the shower
I'll turn on Spotify and like put it in my sink
but like that's what 15 minutes
Do you know people who listen to sad songs
because they want to be sad?
I think that's crazy
I've done that a few times But like aren't you listen to sad song because they want to be sad. I think that's crazy.
I've done that a few times.
But like aren't you sad already?
Why do you want to be more sad?
Yeah, just because like the drama, you know.
It's like maybe you'll get it all out.
See that's worse than having me skipping on the street
to like a theme song.
But I had a friend a couple of years ago.
I would say maybe like four years ago now
where he would call me to like ask me a specific question
or like, like there was a reason he was calling me. It me a specific question or like...
There was a reason he was calling me.
It wasn't just to shoot the shit.
And every so often I'd be like,
are you in the shower?
And he'd be like, yeah, this is where I get a lot of my calls done.
And I would be like, okay, that's insane.
Like, I'm hanging up now.
I do have to say I do a lot when I'm on the toilet.
I now exclusively take shower phone calls. Like if I know that there's someone
that I have to talk to them for like a solid 20 minutes
or 30 minutes, I'll do it in the shower.
Is it like important calls?
No, no, not like business.
But like if I have to tell my mom something
and I'm getting ready to go somewhere.
Accidentally, it gets slippery and you drop your phone?
I have an OctoBody right on the wall.
Do you do FaceTime?
No, sometimes.
It depends on who you're talking to.
Well that definitely depends on who I'm talking to.
This is the thing I want.
The shower for me is peace.
It's like no one can get to me unless if someone breaks in and that's everyone's.
I'm like why don't you do a zoom in there?
Why don't you maximize your day?
Well you're always alone.
Oh.
Sorry.
I'm sorry.
That seemed loaded.
It seemed loaded and pointed.
Okay, right?
To me.
How come whenever-
Well, you're miserable.
So you'll get it.
You're a loner and no one likes you,
so you'll relate to this.
Whenever I'm alone, which is not often,
I always think I'm gonna get punched in the shower.
Oh really?
The shower is where they'll get me.
Like the second, like if someone's been hiding
in my apartment all day, they're gonna come out
when I get in the shower.
And you're a nighttime shower girl, so it's dark.
So I will go and like make sure my door is locked
before getting in the shower.
Yeah.
You know what's something else?
Okay, now that I go down to the suburbs
or I was just home,
and people will always make the argument
of the city's so scary, that's so terrifying,
and no one ever does the opposite.
Are you kidding?
The suburbs are one of the scariest places.
The crickets. The crickets. I'm home alone at Craig's house. Are you kidding? The suburbs are one of the scariest places.
The crickets?
I'm home alone at Craig's house. I'm like, but no one would hear me scream.
That's the thing. When you're in New York, there's people everywhere. There's police everywhere.
Everyone is on call. Yes, some people do get hit every now and then.
Like if someone broke into my apartment, realistically, it's two feet big.
Where are you going to go?
I can get out the door.
Also how are they gonna escape? It's a way for the elevator. No literally.
You're like can you get lobby for me? The elevators are never working certainly not
gonna work for my murderer you know. No I always get scared that like a crazy
drunk lumberjack is just gonna be running around the suburbs. I'm like I oh
my god I'm so scared of like suburbs. I'm like I oh my god
I'm so scared of this sounds planes just like like I don't know what a plant like a vast
Yeah, oh, I know that scary when you're driving and you're like if my car went down like we get it's like the hills have eyes
Have you seen the hills of eyes? No, but I can surmise and it's just it's scary
I was actually was the scariest thing that ever happened to me
It's a movie where like I guess there was some kind of Chernobyl shit that happened.
So there were like creatures living in the hills that like had some kind of fucked up eyes.
They were just like creatures.
Suburban moms with bodies.
Cause that's a really scary species.
Also when you watch all these like murder things, most of them were in the suburbs.
No, 90% of them.
And like- My biggest worry right now is that my neighbors know I smoke weed
because they can smell it.
And like when I walk out my apartment, I'm like, prove it, you know,
but like prove it's coming from this unit.
But I know that if someone was killing me inside my apartment
and I ran out there, they'd be able to help me, you know, like someone would hear.
Someone would hear.
I mean, Jeffrey Dahmer did kill like a lot of people in his apartment in Milwaukee and no one knew
Eventually, right? Yeah, and the silver lining anyway speaking of air pods. Wait. Yeah, let's circle back
Okay, so like I'm you know, what's wrong people like I don't trust them because it's like capacity
I think the government's like in your brain. No, not at all. Do you know like Wi-Fi doesn't really work?
Yeah, so I'm like I'm not gonna risk. Bluetooth like doesn't work a lot
So I'm like I just don't believe it works. Wait
And then you know when you're someone sits next to you and it tries to connect to your phone
You're like yeah, this thing clearly doesn't fucking work
Like figure it out
No, I don't think it works. I've never tried it, but I don't think it works.
And then, it's a tic tac.
I'm going to lose it.
I think it's, I know I'm going to lose it.
I know I'm going to, like, it's going to fall in the sink.
I know something bad is going to happen, so I'm like, I'd rather save my money.
Also, like-
So what are your, what's your headphone of choice?
So I collect Delta headphones.
So I have like hundreds of Delta headphones.
No, no, no, no, no. Like hundreds and then I just tuck them away.
They have the, with a string? Yeah, but it doesn't connect to your phone though. So what are you
using it with your iPad? I'm a speaker girl, I'm a speaker girl in the house.
Everyone's on speaker. When you get on a plane, what do you put, you put the
Delta headphones in your ears and you connect it to what? The TV, the Delta TV and if
there's no TV we're sleeping. No headphones in? No, cuz I sleep. The second
one in moving vehicle, I'm sleeping. So this is so, I actually don't even know what my first question is. I'm fighting for my life trying not to get punched so like there's no. First of all
Bluetooth works. It works 90% of the time if not every time 90%
I couldn't tell you the last I couldn't tell you the last time I didn't connect
Bluetooth didn't connect that do you ever feel like someone it's my connect to the wrong person you'd be like hello
Not one time not one time is it like a man just like hey
Not one time has it been like a man just like, hey. You know when the radio station's a little off, it's just an alien.
They're like, mwah, greetings, earthlings.
It's like, hey, I'm in 13C if you want to come back here.
No, Bluetooth works.
Secondly.
Do you have to charge it?
Yeah, like that's so much admin.
When do you charge it?
When you charge your phone?
Okay, but when you get on a plane also like there's
Technology now that like you never have to hear the sound of an airplane ever again like the noise cancelling is game-changing
Sometimes when I fall asleep, I'm not listening. I need noise to quiet my own thoughts.
I don't want to be sitting in silence.
That's the scariest thing you've ever said to me.
So you get on a plane most of the time.
Raw dog. Raw dog.
Wait for her or he.
To walk around and say,
Does anyone need headphones?
And I always go, yep. And then I say thank you.
Because regardless, I like free shit.
I'm going to take it. I'm gonna take it.
I will put, the amount of Delta headphones I have
in my bag is crazy.
This is a wild revelation.
And then I love a fresh new pair, you pull it out.
I think you're single-handedly keeping
the Delta headphones alive,
because every time she walks by and says,
headphones, headphones, in my head I always think
Without headphones I can see one one or two times. Oh, I forgot my headphones
But there's multiple people raising their hand the air pods connect to the Delta thing
Well, there's an attachment you can buy it's called an airfly
I have it and you plug it into again TV
It's like capitalism was again like how many attachments do I have to get when I like, you know
I have a little pouch that has all my like headphones why I love a pouch. I love
You love a fucking about when she came with her tanning stuff
She brought it in a pouch the cutest little pink pouch little leopard. I own 8000 you'll never throw away a pouch
Actually, my mom was like that too. She's like, why are you throwing that pouch away?
We could use it. And I go, what are we using this pouch for?
You can always find something to wear a pouch.
And then she'll put all this stuff in pouches and put it
and then I take it all out and I'm like, why did you put it in all these pouches?
Well, all my pouches are in a pouch that lives in one big pouch.
That's how you control that.
I think you have a pouch problem.
A pouch addiction.
But you know what it is?
Now I can have a look at a pouch again.
When the AirPods first came out, their PR wasn't good.
It was like people were dicks.
AirPods came out 20 years ago.
No, when they first came out and guys were walking around
with their AirPods and they were yelling with their AirPods,
everyone was like, okay, you're a fucking loser.
Like, oh, you have AirPods. Like, what are you selling stocks 24 7, chill out.
Okay. And I think I just never
got past that. I was like, I'm not a dick and I'm wearing AirPods. And then like one day I looked around and everyone was wearing AirPods.
Who? Who are you?
I think I joked with one of my friends was like, AirPods are for fucking dicks.
And then like I'm still in the corner joking about it when everyone's like no we all use air no
I thought Air Pods was gonna be like threads on Instagram. Yeah, you thought they were gonna die down
Yeah, I thought it was like a thing and then we're gonna be like, okay, we all lost it
How many have you lost? Um, I think I'm on my third pair of Air Pods
But I've had an iPhone for 20 years
I would say that it's probably not great from the environment that I have 4,000 Delta headphones.
And also they're all in a knot.
I can't believe you haven't got a hundred.
It's one huge knot.
You've never used one twice.
You can't use it again.
Once you put it in, it just, it dies.
How does it do the most intense Boy Scout knot
that you've ever witnessed just by me putting it in my bag?
Like what is the science behind that?
No, that's like, that's a black hole.
That's like a quantum theory.
But you see like when we do the podcast over Zoom,
I always, you always see.
Actually I-
And that's a delta.
Yeah, I actually, I'll do interviews like,
like promoting comedy, like live TV.
Is that-
With your delta headphones.
We, have they been laughing? Have they been like the Stygian standard?
No, because people probably don't know, but I can't believe you don't have like a good
pair of like headphones, not AirPods.
It's so big.
Like I just don't want to bring it.
Like it's like an umbrella.
Like why?
It's like so much.
Dude, literally couldn't get more compact.
But also, I feel like it's a little like,
when you have big headphones, it's like, okay.
It's like when someone sneezes loud,
you're like, how much attention do you need?
You know, like calm down.
Like, and then you can tell it's for the outfit.
Wait.
Like it's.
I'm on two different.
Yeah, colors, like people are like leaning in.
I have the green big ones,
because I was like, they're so pretty
and I saw all these fashion girlies having them
and then like matching into their green fucking shoes.
Capitalism once again.
And then.
Are they Bluetooth?
Yes, every headphone is Bluetooth.
It's 2024, every headphone is a Bluetooth.
When COVID hit, I did Watch Office Live.
Yep, and you swore off all headphones.
And someone had Bluetooth and Andy was like,
oh, like the Bluetooth, like you don't sound good
with the Bluetooth.
Okay, but yeah, because that's a computer
onto a television show that they're trying to rework it,
not you listening to your TikToks on an airplane.
You can watch TikToks on airplanes?
I'm just kidding. I was like, wait, do you never connect to the Wi-Fi? Ticktocks on an airplane. It's you can watch Ticktocks on airplanes
We learned that you could text which I don't like
Time when I'm like I'm on an airplane like sorry
This was like connect to the wife. I go what and then I was like I on a plane. I can. I remember, yes. I know like the first time that happened to me,
I was flying to LA and I was like, good,
no one can talk to me for like six hours.
Someone was like, okay, cool.
So like, you'll do this while you're on your flight.
And I'm like, no, the act is I'm on my flight.
That's the most part about flights is you don't feel guilty
cause you're like, I'm literally traveling through there.
But you know when you would land and you'd be like,
let's see all the people who've been texting me.
That was a great feeling.
And then it's literally just your mom.
Yeah, like, OK, tracking you.
And she's like, did you make it?
Did you land?
Text me when you land.
I'm like, oh my god.
You go to Instagram Zero Messages and you're like, OK.
No, but now you can just see it.
I will say, though, the past couple of times I've flown Delta,
I've had no Wi- like over six hour flights.
Yeah, sometimes they're just like oopsie.
No, they're literally like our bad.
Also, I had a six hour flight, humble brag,
and I couldn't like change the screen.
And you feel like a dick if you're like,
hey, my screen's not working.
Cause they're like, you're fine.
They're like, well, we have to shut down everyone else's
screen just to make yours work.
I do have to say, there was this one person that was like,
my chair is a little clinky or something with the chair.
But nothing bad.
I think it just moved a little bit.
And I remember thinking, this is not going to be good.
And I looks at the person next to me, and they looks at me.
And I just was like, I don't think this is good, I'm getting a bad feeling.
We had to deplane.
We had to deplane,
because they had to get a mechanic in
to like tighten the thing.
And we were like three hours late,
because this one person was like,
her chair was clicking a little.
I don't want her to be uncomfortable,
but like instead be like,
hey, can you just give me a refund for this flight?
But like, we'll go.
That happened to me.
It was a over like four hour flight. My seat never went back. We but like, we'll go. That happened to me. It was a over, like, four hour flight.
My seat never went back.
We're like up in the air.
And the flight attendants were like,
mm, we have nothing for you.
Like, we can't do anything.
And I was just like, okay.
And then when I landed, I called and I was like,
give me that fucking money back.
Like, I'm not sitting there and paying that.
Some people don't, they think going back is rude
if you put your seat back.
Wait.
Did you say that?
I didn't say that, but I've seen that,
that people think it's rude.
But like the whole point is we all go back.
If the seat goes back, if it's made to go back,
I'm going back.
Also like, if you go back, when I go back,
everyone's happy.
Right, and even if you don't go back,
I don't care, because I'm going back.
Well, also like, I consider myself an empath, and I've never once thought about how the person was feeling behind cuz I'm going back. Well also like I consider myself an empath and I've never
once thought about how the person was feeling behind me when I went back. No because when the
person in front of me goes back I go oh and we're going back. I thought you go back I go back we're all
enjoying life together. We're going back. We're gonna sit up straight like a nerd. I have a question do you know
that when and it's different on all these different flights, but... And it's different for everyone.
It's different for everyone. No one's right or wrong.
You know when the window is like, it's not your window, and it's not their window,
it's like an in-between window, but like it's, no one's putting it down.
It's an uncomfy window.
Do you reach front and push it down?
I have before. Because I believe in certain etiquette on flights
in terms of the windows.
Like if it's before noon, put that fucking window down.
Put it down, it's too bright.
And so if we're taking off,
and sometimes they want them all down.
Also, if you are gonna wake someone up
when you're about to land in New York City,
because you're gonna tell them you want to see the view,
grow up.
Grow the fuck up.
And if I'm in the window, don't even look at it,
because I own it.
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Oh my gosh, Sheena just texted me.
Wait, it's so funny because.
Let's see what she said.
What do you think she said?
I feel like she's always in town watching
Ravens Live doing like the most fun stuff.
Yeah, she's usually like, hey guys,
she's definitely like, hey guys, I'm in town.
She didn't text me.
I think she knows that I'm with you.
Hey, she's definitely like, hey Hannah, I'm in town.
Yeah, she's like, I'm-
Do you wanna get together?
I'm doing X, Y, and Z.
She's always doing-
She's always doing something.
Like an event.
And as someone who just spent four days with a toddler,
Lois, who's the greatest,
I don't know how people do it.
Yeah, yeah.
Give us a little insight.
She's the cutest.
What time was Lois getting up?
What's her sketch? So she was having a little time change from Indiana but like she goes to bed
kind of late. Like she's a party animal. She's a creative. Like 839. She's like I get all my best work done.
All I know is the only person that could wake me up in the morning is Lois.
Yeah. And she walks in and her hair is always like, you know, when you wake up, everyone happy, you're just like, and she looks at me and she calls me.
Henny.
Oh, that's so cute.
Henny.
And you went to all, I saw you at museums.
We went to museums.
I went to, I went to museums.
What did we do?
I was like playing on the playground.
Just so much playing.
A lot of playing.
Yeah.
When she was leaving, I was like,
I didn't want to get emotional.
Good riddance Lois. No, I didn't want to get emotional because I was going to miss her. Like, she I didn't want to get emotional. Good riddance Lois.
No, I didn't want to get emotional.
I was going to miss her.
She's the cutest thing ever.
Me, good riddance Lois.
Get them a can of beer.
Either you're going to be like, I'm exhausted.
She's going to leave, but obviously I don't want to make it a thing because I don't want
her to be traumatized because she's still...
It's crazy to see a thing that isn't traumatized.
I don't want to cause trauma for her.
So I was like, don't make eye contact.
Give her a little wave.
She doesn't know.
And she starts walking,
cause everyone's leaving to go to the elevator.
She loves the, Eva later.
And then she comes back and looks at me and I said, bye.
And then she runs up to me and she goes, honey come.
And I said, well now I'm traumatized.
I don't know my name is Travis.
She's like, come, come.
And I said, honey can't come.
Honey can't come. Hannah's, Hannah can't come.
You immediately go third person.
Hannah needs to make money for this family.
And by this family I mean butter.
I don't know where my husband is.
You're like, Hannah, Hannah can't do another museum.
Hannah is museum-bound.
Hannah needs to sleep and Hannah needs to get her life back.
So it made you more, more like, oh my god, I could do this.
Well, she leaves and Des was like,
sick, do you really want that?
It's fucking exhausting.
But it's funny, because then I have Nick Viall content
all over my page for some reason, because Nick had a kid.
Yeah.
I feel like there needs to be a study for like all new dads who are like
Who are like no one's gonna ever hurt her and it's like, you know what?
We're someone's daughter, too
I'm also someone's daughter and my dad looked at me one one day and said no one's gonna hurt her and guess what?
Just burnt. Nick is actually becoming the ultimate daddy influencer and he
just burnt. Nick is actually becoming the ultimate daddy influencer and he said but he was like you wake up and like you have a purpose and I was like I have a purpose.
And that spoke to you? No. Like having a kid. I was like wow. I'm trying to make funny jokes about stupid things. I need to think of jokes. That is my purpose.
Yeah.
The whole purpose of keeping something alive
seems a little dramatic.
Yeah.
And then he was like, you know, for all the guys out there
who are partying in their early 20s,
being a dad is actually pretty cool.
And I was like, what kind of riddle is he trying
to confuse people with?
This is the thing.
If you have it, you'll figure it out.
Right.
If you don't have it, the question is,
are you gonna miss it?
I do.
Are you always gonna be like, what if I had kids?
Yeah.
Yeah.
Am I even gonna travel that much?
Did I need an advocate because I wanna travel?
I don't really, I travel to shows,
but I'm not going to the Maldives all the time.
Here's the thing for us. I think here's the thing for us,
I think that what it is deep down, we-
Are selfish.
Love ourselves.
No one loves me and you more than me and you.
I don't think, our moms come close, but-
No, I know.
But I love myself.
Yeah, my mom, for example was like decided wanted to go into medicine
Yeah, was like in hospitals and was like, you know what?
This isn't for me. Mm-hmm
And she didn't like the vibes and then was like changing careers and was like we could have a kid right now
There can be a part of our life when something happens that we're like, maybe this is actually the perfect time for a kid
Yeah, but then people have kids in very not ideal times they make it work right like if you this is the thing though
You know what it is. I think me and you should freeze our eggs this summer
I've been thinking about it, and I've been talking to my mom about it
And she said well why don't you do it with Hannah?
Why don't you just taking out like your makeup fridge?
And like okay, I have one girl here, two girls here. You put your serums, your eggs, your embryos.
You gonna wish I was cuter?
No, I feel like there was a moment in time where I thought like you took your eggs with you.
Like you froze your eggs but like you like you put them in your own. Let's be honest no one
actually knows how to freeze your eggs. No. Even the girls who are doing it they're explaining
I'm like you're not you don't know how to freeze your eggs. No but I think freezing your eggs is
like very normal now but this this is the thing, who decided
that just cause we can have kids is what we should do?
Like what if the life is actually happier without kids,
but everyone is just trained for evolutionary purposes
to make kids and it's a life hack to actually not have kids
and you can just visit your aunt.
This is one of our struggle that we're different in. I know for sure I wanna have kids and you can just visit your aunt. This is one of our struggle that we're different in.
I know for sure I wanna have kids,
but also I'm over here like,
I don't know if I wanna get married ever.
Yeah, you can't even commit to getting married,
but you wanna have kids.
But then again, it's very celebrity to just have a kid.
Yeah, I feel like it's really chic.
And Out of Wedlock is so in right now.
Wait, I love that you wrote on the thing, spring trends, because literally as I was
typing something, I looked up and saw it.
Capri pants, I can't wait to wear them.
Look I actually do like it.
I think they're so cute.
You know who's gonna rock them?
Who?
Your mom.
She looks so good.
So cute in a capri.
I can't.
First of all, massive calves.
Also my calves are short.
So capri pants make my calves look even smaller.
What do you mean your calves are short?
I have short shins.
Like I have a normal body up until my knee
and then my knee to my foot is like three inches.
But it's not.
It's pretty, okay, it's short.
Like I did a rowing machine and I just didn't move.
I was like moving back and forth. I just didn't go. I was like, I'm just a small shin.
I feel like you should never not be this color hair. That was the funniest way you put a compliment together.
You're like never don't not do that. Don't ever change your hair. I love this color.
Do you remember the limited two capris that were like plaid? Yes. Yes.
I used to wear those every day to school.
That had like a matching shirt that has like a saying on it
that's like cutie pie, like love soccer.
Yeah.
It was just the most insane slogan.
23.
It was like weird presidential slogans
for middle school girls. It was like, I love America wink.
It was like, if you don't love dogs, like love cats also.
It was just so crazy.
Activists and pigtails.
Also, like we couldn't read at the time.
We'd wear anything at that point.
Okay, capris, you can wear.
What shoes are you wearing with the capris?
And don't say a ballet flat
No, not a ballet flat like a little open toe
Heel and heel doesn't have to be kitten. Why are kitten heels harder to walk in the normal heels
Kitten heels are so fucking no one talks about it
and then they all they do is put like a little bit of a wrap around your ankle and
Obviously, I'm gonna flop around in it. Yeah, those always never stick to my ankle.
Why do I feel like the patriarchy invented these kind of shoes?
Because some shoes, the like, people would just be like,
yeah, you're not supposed to be able to walk in them.
That's called a badly made shoe.
Is the whole point of shoes to walk?
I call certain shoes like car-to-table shoes.
But like, see, I don't think, I don't think that's cool.
Again, we're different on this one,
because I will stuff my foot into anything that looks good
and I'll bleed for six hours if it's like the perfect show.
Because if I'm going out and I need to defend my friend physically,
I cannot be wearing kitten heels.
That's another thing in like fight or flight.
I feel like I'm never in the right outfit to be I cannot be wearing kitten heels. That's another thing in like fight or flight I feel like I'm never in the right outfit
To be fight like I like will want to be but I'm like, you know what it is
I'm running these hills
It's like why I don't like getting too drunk or like getting too high or like wearing kitten heels or like wearing something
Say no to kitten heels.
Don't do kitten heels.
Or just add that into dare.
Like, can you actually add something to the dare program?
It's kitten heels.
We're really against it.
Kitten heels is a gateway drug.
But you know what some outfits like you can-
Kitten heels lead to stripping.
Do you know some outfits?
And we support sex work.
Do you know some outfits where you can't raise your arms,
some you can't sit down in?
I feel so out of control.
Like in that moment I'm like, but what if I had to?
If I had to raise my arm right now?
Or like, if I get high I'm like,
what if I had to put sense together right now?
You have that of like, when you're a little kid
and you just realized that you could say no to your mom
about something you're wearing?
Like, I feel like you never lost that.
Apparently when I was born, they put like a hat on
and I got my finger stuck in it
and then tried to pull it off
and they called me crazy animal
because all the other babies were like, me, me, me, me, me.
And I was like, get this off my fucking head.
I would like actively go get the bows that match my socks and give them to my mom
I wouldn't wear socks. I refuse to wear socks
I was like I will not wear socks. I will not I my mom would have to dress me like the night before
To like trick me into like wearing an outfit the next day. I would tell my mom we're getting dressed the night before
I'm gonna trick me be like, what's that? And like put a t-shirt on me. I wish, just for one day, we could have met as seven-year-olds.
We would have been obsessed with each other.
I wouldn't go outside unless I had a cute outfit.
I was like, I can't play with all the other kids
and my outfit's not better.
I wore the same striped t-shirt every day.
That's so cute.
No, I was really adorable.
I think boots and a skirt are gonna look so good
this spring.
My problem is when it's hot and I wear boots,
it's just a disaster.
It's slushy and sweaty.
Inside your shoe?
Well, you can't wear a tight boot.
Like a spring boot.
Like something that has a little give to it.
So it's not like your leg is right against the leather.
Because I'll wear like black leather in the spring and I get like shin splints.
Honestly, you know who has like really good knee-high boots that are like a little pulled
away from your leg and like sturdy and good is Zara.
Oh, I love that.
People are now like obsessed with tennis.
Everyone's like tennis has never happened before.
And I'm just like, okay.
What's going on?
I've been just like, everyone's wearing tennis this summer.
Everyone's wearing tennis.
I'm like, welcome.
Coming for your brand.
It does feel a little like.
Wait, when's that Sundae a tennis movie come out?
Don't talk to that movie.
Cause I watch the tennis channel all day.
So they keep playing it.
I'm so, okay, I'm gonna have to say it again.
I support women in the arts.
How dare they?
First of all, put the racket in her hand the right way.
If you're gonna say she's the greatest player that ever did tennis, it's disrespectful to
Zendaya.
Who is it?
No, but who is she being?
Just like, oh, this is made up, made up.
She's the greatest player ever played, and she's holding the racket wrong.
It's literally like doing a football movie
about like the greatest and then like he's throwing
the football not even holding it the right way.
It's disrespectful.
It is.
And then she tears her ACL,
which is not a career ending injury.
It happens all the time.
It takes seven months and she tears it.
Don't tell Des that.
No, I'm not.
My old man Des has recovered from it.
And then career ending.
And this top athlete.
And this top athlete.
And she also tears it like, just stepping to the side.
And she's like, ah.
And then also, what really pissed me off
was that the two tennis guys that she like has a threesome
with are so, I don't want to be mean, but like.
Do it.
Tennis guys are so fucking hot.
They're all six, three, big shoulders, chiseled, cocky fucking hot. They're all six three big shoulders chiseled
Cocky hot they pick twerps that are like the two like find fucking hot
Yeah, like the fucking any tennis team. I hope those two don't listen this pod. I'm sorry
No, but like they're great actors, but they're not like
We are not good looking and we don't what I have to say, this is why.
It's hard.
It's just been airing our grievances.
Cause when you first listen to a song, if you like that song, that's insane.
Like whenever I first listen to any song, for me to like any song, it has to play in
the background 800 times.
And eight people have to text me about it and be like, have you heard this song?
I need to hear it as a TikTok sound for four months before I'm like, wait, I like that
song. Have you heard that song? If you listen to a song once and'm like, wait, I like that song. That's a good song. Let me hear that song.
If you listen to a song once and you go,
yes, this song is good, that's crazy.
Yeah, I don't know.
Like I listened to Ariana Grande's album
and I was like, the only song I like is Yes, Ang.
You say Ariana.
Ariana.
Ariana.
So anyway, the tennis movie Zendaya, Zendaya,
I don't support it.
I'm vocally speaking against it.
If you are a journalist, notice how no journalist
ever pulls a quote from Giggly Squad
because I think they're like, we can't.
They've never taken a quote.
I saw an article, what the fuck was this article?
I don't even know what the article was.
And they quoted Reddit.
And I was like, there's just no way people are out here
quoting fucking Reddit.
That's one of the craziest websites.
That's like a student using Wikipedia.
You're not allowed to do that.
No, that's just like people's literal opinions
and hobbies.
I could go on and say some of the craziest shit.
I know that there's actual reporters
who listen to Giggly Squad for fun
because they have amazing taste,
and I support all their work.
They've never once been like,
this is an important opinion.
From the Gigglyily Squad podcast.
Anyway, patient Hannah said,
when you're on a plane, if it's seat back time,
it's seat back time. Direct quote.
Follow the person in front of you.
Okay, direct quote, this shit.
I do not support Zendaya movie.
As a former tennis player, I think it's bad for women in sports.
And we just started doing well in basketball, and now you're taking us back with tennis.
Also get some hot guys.
Yeah.
They're like the same height as her.
Tennis guys need to be minimum six feet.
I just, I don't know if there's much more to say about what you said at all.
And I agree.
And I wholeheartedly concur.
Thank you.
And you're not allowed to watch it
I think the outfits though are gonna be so good because her outfit that she just wore did you?
Did you see the set she just wore that was like a tennis brand set
But then she put like this crystal maxi skirt over it and it looks so cool. I missed it
I'm not supporting the campaign. I'm not supporting the campaign.
I'm not supporting the campaign.
I blocked it.
I'm an attendant to you.
I blocked them all.
For the tennis community, I will not support her press outfits.
If she doesn't want to do a hand the street, I'll do it, but I will confront her.
We didn't even talk about this because it's so crazy, but all the P. Diddy stuff.
I'm in deep, deep, deep, deep.
I mean, I can't even scrounge my way out of it.
Yeah.
Reddit.
So this is the thing, we're Italians.
The whole Italian thing with the mob is like,
snitches get stitches.
Yeah.
P Diddy straight up was like,
apparently he's gonna tell them everything of anyone who's ever been involved in fucked up shit that he did.
But like, because it's all about like pedophilia,
yeah, go.
No, for sure. But I'm saying like, they're saying stuff like,
you saw the Jay-Z stuff?
No, I'm in a deep hole about Jay-Z basically being gay.
Like, it's so intense.
Allegedly.
Allegedly.
Allegedly.
Killed his baby mama.
Well, his baby mama died.
Well, we don't know. Allegedly is baby mama.
Allegedly.
No, she's dead.
Of a brain aneurysm.
Of a brain aneurysm.
And she was like a very, she was a fitness know. Allegedly is baby remember. Allegedly. No, she's dead. Of a brain aneurysm. Of a brain aneurysm.
And she was like a very, she was a fitness coach.
Allegedly.
Like she was fitter than Zendaya in the tennis movie.
Allegedly.
I actually really want to listen to Beyonce's full album.
Cause I want it, I want it.
I wanted to say for all the things she's saying.
Should we go home and listen to it then?
Should we have a listening party and just sit?
I mean, I did once I kept seeing all the TikToks
like, did you listen to the album?
I love this one.
I love that one.
I did like, skim.
I like that she was like,
you remember when she showed up to the Grammys
and was wearing the cowgirl hat
and that was her like Easter egg?
Yeah.
I want an Easter egg.
Like, Giggysquad needs to Easter egg.
What should we Easter egg?
Do you know what Easter egg is?
Like give little hints?
Yeah.
But we're big mouths and like if anything happens we're like, oh let's sell the Gigglers.
We're not mysterious enough to Easter egg.
We're not strategic enough to Easter egg.
I couldn't even wait two days until I got to the White House to be like, oh we gotta
tell the Gigglers we're going to the White House.
Also I watched on Apple Plus there's this thing called Dynasty about the New England
Patriots that's so fucking good. Wait, I watched Martha Stewart. Did I tell you that? Oh my god!
Were you inspired kind of? Beyond. Beyond. The poncho. It's all about the poncho.
I mean she went into jail and was like sorry I'm just gonna take like a quick
rebrand. Rebrand. I'm gonna rework.
Honestly, jail was the best thing that ever happened to her.
She got to sit and focus alone for a goddamn minute,
didn't give anyone up,
was like, I'd literally rather go to jail,
get this over with,
than have any of you continue to talk to me.
She also wouldn't admit that she made a mistake.
She'd rather do seven months in jail
than say you were right.
No, she loves revenge.
She fucking must love revenge
because that is so women coded of like,
I rather sit in jail and rot
than ever say that I fucked something up.
And also let's be honest.
Can we talk about her husband for a second too?
Because everyone was like,
oh yeah, she just like works so much,
and he was just like, you know, set,
he was a little bit like secondary,
and then he left her because of that?
Yeah.
Like, fuck you.
Yeah.
Sorry that she was building a brand,
and just crushing it.
I think she felt that way too.
She was like, fine, go.
And she-
No, literally scram.
And she's, you've never seen her with anyone else,
which is kind of the ultimate decentering.
I wonder if she's on the low, like,
100%.
Fucking.
100%.
She probably just picks a guy and tells Secret Service
to bring them to her chalet.
She made me wanna just redecorate everything and just.
I mean, the woman invented entertaining.
She was like, this is how to be a rich,
stuck-up Connecticut person.
Yeah.
And just follow my book.
She was like, it's clear that no one here has ever
thrown a dinner party, you actual pieces of trash.
I do have to say, the whole dinner party thing,
when people are like, I love throwing dinner parties,
what is that life?
Like, that you, A, love to socialize.
You're like, you know what would make my life better
if I had to cook, decorate, invite people over,
and then clean after?
That's my nightmare.
Well, even the thought of people having,
having people over to my own home to socialize.
It's dirty.
Get out.
It's get out.
Like, what if I hit a moment where I was like,
mm, and I want everyone to leave right now.
I watch HGTV right now.
It's like a weird phase I'm going through,
but I'm obsessed with it.
And they'll be like, what kind of house are you looking for?
And they're like, we love to entertain.
And I'm always like.
What?
Like you just want strangers running around.
Or you know those like celebrity documentaries
where they wake up and there's always like
a hundred people in their house.
Like, oh, that's my assistant's assistant. and that's my makeup artist. That's my agent
I'm like go!
One of mine and Craig's biggest fights to date driving down the street block party on the corner like all these kids running around
The yard parents talking. Which is basically a child parade continue. Yep. Craig said something like oh
I can't wait to like go to like block parties
Craig said something like, oh, I can't wait to like go to like block parties,
like with my kids in the neighborhood.
And I started laughing and I go, I will never,
you'd have to literally drug me, tie my hands behind my back,
drag me to that fucking block party.
A party on your street that you live on
with all the other people that live on that street?
No, I don't even know who lives across the hall from me. On your street that you live on with all the other people that live on that street? No
I don't even know who lives across the hall from me. We live three inches from each other
Get the fuck out of here. You did get into a little altercation with your neighbor once well that was like girls
Yes, for the girls girls, but like a man lives across the street
I have no idea what even looks like across the hall
I do what it even looks like or across the hall. No.
Anywho.
Entertaining is stressful.
It was like, I don't even know.
It was like, you don't even know me because-
Do you know what I would be like the worst at?
Below deck.
I would be fired so quickly.
I, no, I would be fired.
I was trying to think if there was,
even like the deckhand thing, I'd be like,
they'd be like, is that clean?
What does that have to do with entertaining?
I don't just, no, cause you know how they have to make the...
Have you ever watched Below Deck?
Yeah, but they're working.
This isn't like coming to your house.
I know, but they're basically like, welcome to my yacht,
and then they have to make this party.
My mom loves it.
This one girl was really good at...
Tablescapes.
Tablescapes.
I didn't even know what tablescape was until Summer House,
when you were like, I'll do the tables scape and I was like that's me like
hey!
Hello.
Okay go table scape and you put a candle in the middle and I was like okay fucking Picasso
calm down you put like a branch and a candle.
It was very avant-garde how dare you and it was a lemon. I put a bunch of lemons around.
Big lemons.
I do have to say, I just started the New England Patriots dynasty thing. And if you like sports or not, I love sports.
But if you don't, it's so fucking dramatic.
The Apple?
Apple+.
So it starts with this guy Drew Bledsoe, hot.
Why is every quarterback the hottest guy ever?
Anyway, so he's so hot and he's the big guy on campus.
And...
And...
And...
And...
And...
And...
And...
And...
And...
And...
And...
And...
And...
And...
And...
And...
And...
And...
And... And... And... And... And... And... Look, he's the man. Yeah. Okay, he's the man. Yeah, I get it.
He's the face of the franchise.
They call him.
He's the shit.
And then they select fourth overall Tom Brady, who's this kind of just like, they said he
walks around like a giraffe.
Like he's kind of annoying and whatever.
He's not even second, whatever.
Okay.
Drew Bledsoe.
What's his last name?
What?
Bledsoe?
Bledsoe. Drew Bledsoe. What's his last name? Bledsoe? Bledsoe. Drew Bledsoe.
So, like that? So, he gets hit, speaking of bleeding, he gets hit and like his insides get crushed or whatever.
So he has to go to the hospital and they throw in Tom Brady.
Okay. And Tom Brady, I think he like won the game.
And they were like, okay. So he kept playing and he keeps winning.
And then Drew Bledsoe finally feels better
and he's on a hundred million dollar contract, mind you.
A hundred million dollars.
Tom Brady's playing for like Snickers bars.
Comes back and the coach goes,
yeah, you can sit on the bench, we're still playing Tom.
Talk about awkward in the locker room.
Tom is this young boy,
the other one's a hundred million dollar quarterback, but they like what Tom's bringing. And it's
like all this drama and that was just the beginning of it. I love when the men
have drama. The men were like, he's like look like obviously I'm disappointed
but like I support my team. Yeah. I love my team. He's about like the coach is
always like you know they played good. Yeah. They put their blood, sweat and tears into it.
It's all about the good and the bad.
I do have to say, thank God I didn't become a professional athlete because I would have
had too much fun with interviews.
Like, press conferences, they're so media trained to the point that their job is to
like not say anything for anything to become a headline.
Yeah.
I like love headlines.
Yeah.
I've been trying to get a headline with the Zendaya thing.
I love when there's like a rogue
basketball player who like Just learned how to spell and they get put him in front of the media and he's like he's asking the media the question
You know, like he's like what it was. I don't know they give like one word answers. I love it
I'm like how dumb cuz it is it is reality TV where they're like they create storylines even when it's like not important
They'll be like, oh is there drama between this like I would lean in
I'd be like, yeah, I'll pick a side
I can't believe they don't do more reality shows like like that HBO like hard knock show
Yeah, I'm surprised there's not more
But you know what it is
It's because if you are causing drama off the court or the field, it affects the team in a negative way.
And you have to stay focused on the goal which is winning, because that's the most important thing in life.
Is that you win. If you don't win, you're not lovable, or important, or worthy.
And that's really what we've been trying to say here the whole time.
Yep. That's what my dad said.
Anyway.
You guys, not to like Easter egg, but like.
What?
I think you're not allowed,
that's not how Easter egging works.
You just have to do it.
Not to tell you everything, but.
We're definitely announcing the tour soon.
Yeah.
That's not an Easter egg,
that's literally just telling them.
Guys, we're announcing the date soon,
as soon as one of our agents say that we can do it we're doing it we're taking the photo shoot tomorrow
for it too Easter egg that's our thing Giggly Squad is like Easter egg but it's just us saying it
also fuck April Fools because I went on my phone and it was like Stas is going back to Vanderpump
so I text you and it goes Stas go back to Vanderpump and then I text you and it goes, that's to go back to Vanderpump. And then I look back at it and people in the comments
are like, LOL, April Fools.
And then I go, actually nevermind, sorry, it's April Fools.
Like, we don't need an excuse for people to just lie.
I love reading text messages where like,
people have resolved the issue on their own.
Like, I feel so accomplished when I read a text
and I'm like, oh shoot, that's a problem.
Oh, they figured it out.
Amazing!
Cross that off the list.
It's like, I didn't even do anything.
I'm always like, nevermind, ignore me.
Yeah, I love that.
I figured it out.
So yeah, April Fools is stupid.
April, it's April Fools for me every day
because we're giggly girls.
We're having fun, we're being silly.
Don't use this one day to suddenly try to make a joke
that's not a joke.
I've never seen a good April Fools.
And like some pranks I just like don't find funny.
Most pranks are not funny.
Unless we do them.
Unless we do them.
I feel like I'm the kind of person
who like someone will prank me
and then I'll prank them back and they'll be like,
whoa, that was way too far.
And then I'm like, I don't know what we're doing.
It has to be a certain style of humor for me to think the prank is like really funny.
If it's like borderline I'm gonna get hurt.
It's hard to get the right kind of prank.
Once I like walked in my apartment in college and everyone was like laughing at me and I was like
okay I'm gonna talk about this in therapy.
But like everyone was just laughing and I was like it literally happened for like two hours
it's like three other girls and they all just kept being like,
Hannah, Hannah.
And that was the prank?
They were laughing.
No.
And then like they go, they were like, you just don't like notice anything ever.
And I was like, what?
Like, I don't understand what's happening right now.
And they were like, look up.
And I looked up and there was like a photo of me taped to the ceiling.
And they were like, and I was was like you guys are so fucking stupid
That was the prank they were like you didn't realize it for three hours We're gonna tell you about it naked in the photo. No, it was literally like mine
And they're like you didn't realize it cuz like the girls like dating a
basketball player who could like reach the ceiling and I was like I
hate you all like I'm
That was so stupid and then I probably I wouldn't be like no I like that's so dumb
Teresa juda is like haha funny like it's funny your pictures Teresa Giudice, like, ha ha funny? Like, it's funny.
Your picture is on the ceiling.
Ha ha funny?
It's like, what?
It's not funny.
Honestly, it's a pain for the janitor.
How dare you?
There's a union because of this.
I was like, why would I look up?
Anyone who looks at the ceiling's a weirdo.
I was like, now I have to fuck your boyfriend
because he pissed me off.
With that said, thank you for giggling with us.
Thank you for giggling with us.
And we're also working on something else too.
Easter's not over.
Easter's not over.
Love you guys.
Bye.