Gilbert Gottfried's Amazing Colossal Podcast - 265. Gavin MacLeod
Episode Date: June 24, 2019Captain Stubing himself, actor Gavin MacLeod climbs aboard the Amazing Colossal Podcast for a fun-filled conversation about paying dues, playing bad guys, crushing on Marilyn Monroe, acting with (an...d without) a hairpiece and sharing a years-long friendship with the late, great Ted Knight. Also, Gavin praises Cary Grant, ad-libs with Peter Sellers, cuts the rug with Bing Crosby and breaks into the business with Martin Balsam, Martin Landau and Jack Warden. PLUS: Big Chicken! "Chuckles Bites the Dust"! The brilliance of Blake Edwards! A surprise caller chimes in! And Gavin and Tony Curtis share a donut! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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Sunday, Monday, happy days.
Tuesday, Wednesday, happy days.
Thursday, Friday, happy days.
If you want to have a happy day and you want to have a good time,
tune in to Gilbert Gottfried's amazing, colossal podcast.
This is Charles Fox.
I just had a great time with these guys. Hi, this is Gilbert Gottfried, and this is Gilbert Gottfried's amazing, colossal podcast
with my co-host, Frank Santopadre, and our engineer, Frankurtarosa. Our guest this week is one of the most recognized, versatile,
and popular actors of the last seven decades, appearing in notable films and some of the best
known TV series of all time. Memorable big screen performances include I Want to Live, Porkchop Hill, The Sand Pebbles, Operation
Petticoat, The Party, The Comic, and Kelly's Heroes. He's also made hundreds of appearances
on the small screen in classic shows like The Dick Van Dyke Show, McHale's Navy, Perry Mason, The Untouchables,
The Munsters, The Andy Griffith Show, Hogan's Heroes, Ironside, That 70s Show, Jag, the King of Queens, and Oz, just to name a few.
He also played one of Steve McGarrett's arch enemies,
the notorious drug pusher Big Chicken on Hawaii Five-O. And spoofed his old co-star, Telly Savalas.
In the TV movie, Frank and I are especially fond of Murder Can Hurt You.
But he'll forever be known for portraying a pair of iconic characters and two of them of the most beloved series in the 1970s and 80s.
News writer Murray Slaughter on The Mary Tyler Moore Show and Captain Meryl Stubing on the love boat. In a lengthy and successful career that started back in the 1950s,
he's worked alongside some of Hollywood's biggest names, including Bean Crosby, Tony Curtis,
Gregory Peck, Barbara Stanwyck, Cary Grant, Helen Hayes, Steve McQueen, Peter Sellers,
Robert Redford, faith, and life.
It's our pleasure to welcome to the podcast an actor we all grew up watching
and the only guest we've ever had on this show who can say they attended
Ernest Borgnine and Ethel Merman's engagement party.
The pride of Pleasantville, New York, Gavin McLeod.
Well, it's nice.
That was so long.
I'm glad I lived through all those credits. Yeah.
Welcome, Gavin. You're finally here.
Thank you so much. Pleasantville, New York was a wonderful place to grow up.
Home of the Reader's Digest. My mother worked for them when there were five people in the office.
You know, they went on to do great things.
them when there were five people in the office you know they went on to do great things those one of the wallace the wallace family we used to live in new york got 10 25 fifth avenue
across from the metropolitan and uh every month they would give new flowers and i thought oh
the wallace has donated all those flowers from the reader's digest my mom used to work for them
i was so proud of that anyway i, I love the reading. Thank you.
It's a little like This Is Your Life without Ralph Edwards.
I know.
Now, the one thing I'm most proud of, can you say your birthday?
228, 228, 31.
No.
Okay, so it's February 28th?
1931.
We share a birthday. Oh, there you go. You're kidding me. Yes. it's February 28th? 1931. We share a birthday.
Oh, there you go.
You're kidding me.
Yes.
Are you February 28th? Yes.
Wow.
That's why we're so much alike.
You still have more hair than I have.
What is it with these Pisces?
We all lose our hair.
He's got a few left.
Now, also, I remember
I think the only time
we met, it was at
an autograph signing years
ago.
In Parsippany, New Jersey. Oh yeah, Chillerfest.
Yes. And, oh,
and I gotta say thank you to
Stuart Hirsch for getting us. Yes. And oh, and I got to say thank you to Stuart Hirsch for getting. Yes. Thank you, Stuart.
He's a great guy. He's a good man. And so you were there. And I thought, you know, I'm one of those
people who would watch you on the love boat and say, oh, he's so friendly and kind and considerate he's got to be a total bastard in
real life and and in person you're you're captain stubing well well i guess i'm full of water i mean
i don't know uh i mean i i think in the long run, I played so many different human beings,
some of the meanest people in the world, the drug pushers, all these people.
It was nice to be me for a change.
And yeah, I got to be me.
And I like people I like.
I'm very grateful for my life.
I'm grateful for every day I have still alive.
My father died when he was 39.
He had a very short life. And here I am, 88 years old, still going strong. I have still alive. My father died when he was 39. He had a very short life.
And here I am, 88 years old, still going strong.
I'm so grateful.
And so how can you not be nice for something,
especially when people are nice to you?
Now, I noticed how nice,
I noticed your lines are the biggest lines of them all.
Oh, at the Chiller Fest?
Oh, thank you.
I said, what has he got?
And I looked at his hair.
I said, well, he has a little more hair than I have, but he's got
his beautiful wife with him and
two little children.
And I also
remember the whole time I
was sitting there, I had to
pee desperately.
But I was watching you and going,
well, this guy's older than me and he's not
peeing yet.
Yes, but you've heard of Depends?
Bernie and I discovered Depends years ago.
You and Coppell?
Yeah, we went to the Rose Bowl parade.
And they said, you're going to be up at 4.30 in the morning. You have to sit on this thing until it gets light out and so forth.
I said, Bernie, what are you going to do when you have to urinate?
He said, I don't know.
He's two years younger than I am.
I said, I'll tell you what.
I'll get some Depends.
I'll bring them up.
So I brought them up.
And he and I both wore them.
Guess what happened?
It's so cold out there neither one of us had to go for
the whole morning.
The end of the pandemic.
And we were still full of
that's
anyway
that's a love boat story that
I've never mentioned to anybody.
We feel honored. That's an
exclusive, Gilbert.
That's so funny. That's hysterical.
Gil, if you do another
chiller, get the Depends.
I would work for Depends.
I mean, keep sure. I'll tell you,
we live way down in
the... Well,
can I mention where I live?
I won't get bad letters.
No, no, you're in Rancho Moraz.
I live in the Palm Springs area.
Right.
And my kids and most of them are all up in the L.A. area,
and we have to drive up.
And sometimes that's four hours.
And sometimes it's very difficult because you can't find places to stop.
And my dear, beautiful, wonderful love of my wife.
Wife is my age, too.
And here we are, two alter cockers both saying, have you gone yet?
Have you gone yet?
No, I'm wearing it.
I'm wearing it.
I'm wearing it.
The first time I wore it all the way on Christmas, I finally, I never had to go.
I said, those depends play tricks with you.
It happens.
There's a tip, Gil.
Gavin, why were you cast as so many bad guys
and mobsters and drug dealers and pushers in those days?
Because I didn't have any hair.
I was a young guy without any hair.
Did you ever?
I'm sorry.
There's my hair maker on.
My wig maker's on the phone.
That's okay.
I'll tell you what happened.
Did you read my book?
You know, when I got my first
hair piece the second hand hair piece
from Ziggy yeah it was from Ziggy
that's right and he was bolder than both of us
put together
all these guys working in their hair places
are bald
so he gives me I said
I was working at Radio City Musical
for $34 a week
as an usher and
I had to get my because they don't write parts
for a young bald guy.
You know, even O'Neill didn't do that.
And so I saved up my $125, and I went to the Sins Brothers place.
I think they're still there in New York.
I don't think Ziggy's alive anymore.
I went upstairs.
The guy with the bald head, I'm Ziggy.
How are you, kid?
I said, good.
He says, what can I do? I said, well, look at my head. He said, you don't have any hair. I says,
I know, that's why I'm here. You sell it, I'd like to buy some. He said, let me look at you.
He walks around, looks at the head and so forth. He said, that'll be about $300. I said, oh, no,
no, no. I only have 125. It took me six months to save this. I said, I'm going to make $34 a week at the musical.
I'm a young actor.
They don't write parts for bald-headed young people.
I said, I don't know.
So I need a hairpiece.
He says, come back when you get the money.
I don't have time for this.
I says, all right.
So I start walking down the stairs.
Then I heard, hey, kid.
I turn around.
He says, come on up here.
He says, follow me.
So I followed him, and he opened this big curtain,
and there was a room with a whole wall was a mirror
with a shelf and chairs,
and there's like a skull there with some hair on it.
He said, sit down there.
So I sat down there.
He put this thing on my head.
He said, how do you like that?
It was hair on my head for the first time in years.
I said, it could have looked like a bird nest.
I don't care.
I said, this is magnificent.
He said, you can have this for 125.
I said, but you told me it was like three something or not he said yeah but
you know a guy came in this morning he turned this one in he got a new one you can have this for 125
i said oh oh gee that's wonderful i said who was it he said i'm not permitted to tell you
i said oh i said he said you ever hear of Frankie Lane?
Frankie Lane?
Mule Train.
This is Frankie Lane's hair?
I'm going to wear Frankie.
Wait till I get to the Rockettes and tell them I'm wearing Frankie Lane's hair.
It was wonderful. Except every time we were someplace and we heard Mule Train,
it would go flip-flop, flip-flop, flip-flop by my head.
it would go flip-flop, flip-flop, flip-flop by my head.
It really belonged to not Frankie Lane, though he wore them.
I see.
It worn to B. Wayne, and they had this wonderful radio program.
Oh, oh, oh.
Andre Baruch.
Andre Baruch.
Andre Baruch.
It was Andre Baruch and B. Wayne.
So listen to this.
I was telling this story 40 years later on The Tonight Show.
We're doing the love boat.
The phone rings the next day.
And somebody said, Gavin, somebody wants to talk to you. I said, well, do you know who it is?
He said, a guy named Baruch.
Baruch.
I said, I wonder if that's Andre Baruch.
So I went to the phone. I said, hello. Hello, Gavin. This isuch Baruch. I said, I wonder if that's Andre Baruch. So I went to the phone.
I said, hello.
Hello, Gavin.
This is Andre Baruch.
I, Mr. Baruch, what an honor to talk to you.
He says, I heard you on the Tonight Show.
He said, thank you for the plug.
I didn't know it was a plug telling people he had a bad hairpiece.
I said, he says, I'm in town.
My son represents the three tenors.
And he said,
would you be interested in another
hair piece?
Hilarious.
That's the end of that story.
But he and B. Wayne, he died.
They had a show. He invited me to go
to Florida to see him.
B. Wayne was a big band singer.
And he had died in ensuing years.
And she was still alive a couple of years ago in Beverly Hills,
in a place I knew about.
Anyway, that was the hair.
And I got to tell you, a few months ago,
just switching around the channels,
I came across an old Hawaii Five-0.
Oh, yeah.
And you were the drug pusher and killer.
Big chicken.
Big chicken.
Big chicken.
Now.
Big chicken.
Go ahead.
Do you remember any of your lines?
I can tell you everything about that thing.
Oh, can you do it in a voice?
You did that.
Oh, yeah.
I was doing the play uh
the web and the rock and i got a call doing a new series with jack lord who i had met once before
and uh so i go over there and you know you pick up the script and uh described he said i said
who am i here for she says says, a guy named Big Chicken.
I said, okay.
So I read Big Chicken.
Big Chicken is notoriously thin.
He's 6'6".
He has a goatee.
He weighs about 200 pounds.
And here I am about 240 pounds, 5'10", bald.
I said, what are they calling me for these parts for?
So I said, what a waste of time.
So I read it, and I said, oh, man, this guy is fantastic.
He's so evil.
He got these kids hooked on drugs so they would steal from him
and all these things.
He was evil. So I i said i'll go read so i'll go in and joe gantman was the producer then and i sat down
in a room with him and read it's the same place where we did the mary tyler moore show years
later i'm sitting with him and we read this one scene and it's silence. He says, you know, I never thought you could act.
I said, that's kind of funny.
Then why did I come here?
He said, you blew me away.
I want you to play this character.
I said, he's described as being 6'6".
He said, no, that's John D.F. Black, the author.
He described himself
who i eventually met so i did i went to hawaii that was that that was like the third show they
ever made ricardo multibon preceded me we all had the same suite we stayed in and i was in
and then uh the character was fascinating and um and i thought wouldn't be interesting he's so evil they were wearing
peace symbols in those days i said suppose i wear a peace symbol and have him say peace brother
peace and that's what he did and i incorporated that into that character and the review was
outstanding and they wrote him in again and they they wrote the next one called The Box,
which was, he was in prison, this one.
The first time you see him, he's completely naked.
Yeah, he's taking a shower.
Taking a shower.
And that's where these guys from Parsippany, New Jersey,
they came that day when I was with you,
that first time I saw you with your kids and your wife signing those things.
They came in and said, hey, big chicken.
And they start doing all the lines.
I said, I don't believe you guys.
They came back that night with T-shirts.
They had big chicken on their T-shirts with their lines.
And they started playing some of the scenes.
Now you cut.
And so I said, you guys are fabulous.
This past year, I was there again in another place in Parsippany.
And they showed up on a Saturday night.
People are lined up.
And I hear, hey, big chicken.
Now they got a name.
They got Tony the Greek was with them.
And they got another guy.
And all day long, they do the big chicken lines.
That's fantastic.
They took me out.
It was a Ruth's Chris Steakhouse there,
and they have chicken.
So we all took chicken.
We all had pictures of us holding our chicken.
They gave me a Christmas decoration that said Hawaii Five-O on it,
and they're going to be in Vegas in July,
and they may come over here to see me and my wife.
Oh, they're wonderful guys. They're just
hung up on, they love, they love
big chicken, baby.
And it's so much
fun. You know, you think
maybe they're crazy, but they're very successful
in their own businesses.
They're neat guys. You gotta talk
like big chicken. He wants you to do a little
dialogue.
Oh, oh, oh, oh. Oh, it's been a while.
Yes.
But I want to tell you, you know, you know, you know, you know,
I'm going to have this zip gun right at your head, McGarrett.
Hey, McGarrett, you put me in this place.
Now you're going to get it, McGarrett.
And I put a zip gun to his head.
Are you ready, baby?
Are you ready?
This is big chicken talking.
Big chicken.
Let me lighten your burden, Mr. McGarrett.
Even though she may say bad things about me,
even though as a three-time loser any conviction would close that gate for good on me,
even though all of that,
I'm still safe.
Because I believe in the law.
There's a favorite to you,
Mr. McGarrett.
That's a good citizen.
You take yourself over to that
little jungle.
Maggie's pad.
Just look on that like an early Christmas present, Mr. McGarrett.
Me to you.
I'm going to nail you, chicken.
You'll miss some angle.
You stay smug and I'll stay patient.
And I'll nail you.
Never, Mr. McGarrett.
No chance you'll ever no way peace my son calls me he just sent me something for my birthday i said big chicken mcleod on it that's
great and so that's that So we still have that going.
And it's either Big Chicken
or Chicken Fricassee
or Chicken Layers.
There's a part in your book
where Jack Lord took you aside
and said,
Gavin, you're the bravest actor
I've ever seen.
That's right.
He asked me to do a movie for him.
He wanted to direct.
And I'm the only one they said
he ever had lunch in his trailer.
Wow.
And I had lunch in his trailer and you know and i had lunch in his
trailer and he was telling me he had this movie he wanted me to be in he wanted to shoot it in spain
but it never happened wow because i remember it's big chicken you sounded like a beatnik
you know it's like hey I ain't got no... I ain't got... I can't have it so long ago.
But he was genuinely scary.
Oh, he was terrible.
Yeah.
No, it was probably one of the worst.
I played drug pushers and evil people and all that,
but this guy was one of the...
But actors always say they love playing villains.
You played a lot of them.
Yeah, because you're getting away with something
you couldn't get away with in real life,
and you're getting paid for it.
And I wanted to show that I could do something like that,
especially some of the things I've played,
these outrageous characters,
I mean,
in Kelly's Heroes with Donald,
Oh, sure.
You know,
you played the Moriarty character.
I still get a lot of mail on him.
And,
and then going from him to Murray
on the Mary Tyler Moore show,
it's a big jump.
A lot of range.
It's wonderful.
A lot of range.
Gilbert,
I was telling Gilbert,
you played four different characters on the Untouchables.
I'll assume they were all bad guys.
Porker, Whitey, Three Fingers.
And for some reason, there was a character named Artie McCloud.
Well, I don't know.
If I did, I did.
I remember I was with Marty Balsam, Marty Landau, all those wonderful actors.
Great names.
Wonderful people did those shows.
Tell us about those two, because we brought them up on this show a few times.
Yeah, we love character actors.
Oh, yeah.
Jack Warden, too, who you also work with.
Oh, Jack Warden.
I did Asphalt Jungle with him.
Yes, yes.
You know what he told me? I had done The Sand also work with. Oh, Jack Warden. I did Asphalt Jungle with him. Yes, yes.
You know what he told me?
I had done The Sand Pebbles with Robert Wise, you know?
Mm-hmm.
By the way, I did the introduction to,
there's a new book on Robert Wise out that Joe Jordan wrote.
He asked me to do the introduction.
Oh, great.
So I did that because I had worked for him a few times. I know you guys were close.
He was a wonderful, incredible human being and a great director.
Now, what was the point?
Now I forgot what I was going to tell you.
The character actor, Jack Warden.
Oh, Jack Warden.
Anyway, so when I met Jack, I was at McGuire's house.
He was one of the assistants on The Sand Pebbles
with Steve McQueen and all that.
And we were in China and it was a big, big, long, long 10-month run.
So I went to this guy's house Charlie McGuire Charlie McGuire and Jack Warden was there and Jack said
he was on one of those boats that we were on with McQueen in real life wow he had really been
a sailor on one of these boats on the china seas in real life and
he said they shot at them too because they were shooting at us from the mainland at that time uh
jack warden was great and then i did asphalt jungle he was an actor's actor everybody loved him
one of our favorites working with him you know uh jack Lord was a little different because if his hair moved, you had to do another take.
What about...
His hair, no matter what,
he always had that little bit of hair coming down.
Always.
And Martin Landau?
Marty was so wonderful.
He was on the road with Emory G. Robinson.
I was doing a play out here and he was on the road with Emory G. Robinson. I was doing a play out here, and he was on the road with Emory G. Robinson.
Oh, it's a play that I was doing.
I was doing Marty Balsam's part that he did in New York.
I did on the West Coast.
And when they came out with Emory G. Robinson to do it sometime later,
Marty Landau was in it.
Somebody saw him, and that was the beginning of his film career.
And I think his first movie was North by Northwest.
Sounds right.
With Cary Grant.
Yes.
That sounds right.
I think that was Marty's first one
and he was a wonderful actor and a wonderful person.
And my acting class in New York
was this wonderful, beautiful model
who he eventually married.
And then she did that other series with him
Barbara Bain
and the other
Marty
Martin Balsam
oh boy he was an actor's
actor and he married Joyce Van Patten
one of my best friends we had Joyce here
on the podcast oh you did
she's adorable how is she doing?
We love her.
I love her.
I love her.
And Dickie was so great, too.
But she was great.
I wrote a play for her.
I belong to a group called Theater West,
and I used to write plays and all that.
Carol O'Connor did the same thing.
And I wrote a wonderful part for Joyce
because I thought she was just a sensational actress.
I haven't seen her for years.
We will return to Gilbert Gottfried's
amazing colossal podcast.
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Talking about great New York actors, we said this before we turned the mics on.
We were talking about you working as a cashier.
Yeah.
At Jim Downey's.
At Jim Downey's Steakhouse. And the great Eli Wallach introduced you to somebody.
I first met Eli Wallach when he was doing the rose tattoo when I was in college.
He and Maureen Stapleton.
I came with my John Bartholomew friend, John Bartholomew Tucker.
He had a radio show in New York.
Remember that name?
Yes, yes, I do.
Yeah, he hosted game shows, too.
I do.
He just died two years ago.
He was one of my best friends.
We went to college together for four years and everything else.
We had a nightclub act called the Sophisticates of Comedy.
We were like 18 years old.
What do we know?
Was that the vaudeville act that you started and then you realized vaudeville was dead?
That's right.
That's right.
Right. And then you realized Vaudeville was dead? That's right. That's right. We know that name.
Oh, John was wonderful.
And he went to a retirement home in Nyack or something like that up there.
And there were six of us in college hung out together.
I'm the only one left.
Oh, I'm sorry to hear that yeah i am too yeah i mean you know they were also one i was the youngest so that makes sense a little sense
but great days i mean this in the in the book and you tell i was telling gilbert these wonderful
stories about you eating at the automat and and having no money and the ketchup soup and then
you're working as an elevator operator.
Absolutely.
And that's when I met the elevator operator.
Are you kidding me?
You know, wow.
I took up, you know, you had to buy special tickets
to get into the elevator, the one elevator at Radio City Musical.
And one night, the movie was going to be the world premiere
of the world's largest trailer, something like that.
Oh, yeah.
With Lucy and Desi.
The long, long trailer.
The long, long trailer.
Right.
I brought them and Russell Market, who created the Rockettes, up in my elevator.
Oh, wow.
Lucy and Desi.
I mean, that was my claim to fame.
And guess what?
Three years later, I was on the west coast doing all those desilu
shows i love it walter winterfell the untouchables yeah untouchables yes and tell us tell us about
your starving years with the ketchup soup well you know they weren't that bad i always had
something to eat like you know the ketchup soup soup, and you find Ritz crackers and things like that, and you find a friend that's doing all right,
and we always helped each other starting out, but I never had it that bad, because I always had a
job, you know. I had a job. I used to, when I went to New York, okay, I got a job. I knew one guy
there, Vince Clemmer. He quit college and went to work
at Radio City Music Hall. His uncle worked there working lights. And you join the union and you
make great money. He was making great money. He's the only guy I knew. So I called him when I got
there. He said, well, maybe I can get you a job at the music hall. I said, working the lights? He
said, no, no, no, you have to be in the family. He says, maybe you can be an usher. I said, working the lights? He said, no, no, no, you have to be in the family. He says,
maybe you can be an usher. I said, that would be good. I didn't know it was $34 a week, but listen,
it's better than nothing. And so we lived on Central Park, he and John, a pianist and him,
and now me, on 73rd and Central Park West. And I used to walk. I never could take a subway or a bus or anything else.
I used to walk from there down to walk 6th Avenue
and 51st or 50th Street with Radio City Music Hall
and work and then walk back.
And all those, I would always stop a men's shop
that had in the window men's underwear.
Here we go with men's underwear again.
It was before Depends.
It was before Depends. It was before Depends.
But they had Fruit of the Loom underwear there.
And I would always stop. This is
the God's honest truth. I would look at that
and I couldn't afford it.
I'd look at that and I'd look at
that underwear and I'd say
someday I'm going to get you.
And so
I said making it to me was going in and buying a six pack just like that.
Oh, that's fantastic.
And that was really making it.
That's fantastic.
Back and forth and back and forth and back and forth.
They couldn't afford anything.
That was one of the things in those days.
And then I used to save enough.
There used to be some place where they had hot dogs.
I would have a hot dog but it was a they
would have a lazy susan that would have mustard and onions oh wow relish and all this stuff so i
would have a hot dog but i would put like four inches of other stuff on top of it because that
was the one meal for the day it would let out oh i can still i still get like this when i think about it
those were the early days yeah you were you were an usher first gavin and then again an elevator
operator at radio city and well yes and like i i did that's. I started as an usher, and I had the flashlight.
Right.
But tell us.
Go ahead.
Yes.
I was going to say, go ahead and tell.
But tell us about who you met at, who Eli Wallach introduced you to when you were at.
Oh, then years later.
Downies.
I had gone on the road to do Androcles the Lion.
I met a rockette at a communion breakfast, a Catholic communion.
My mother says, you should go to go to communion.
I said, I'm a little usher at Radio City Musical.
Nobody wants me.
She said, you should go to have communion,
and then you go to the reception afterwards.
You should do that.
I did that, and I saw this
beautiful girl with all these other women
in one empty seat next to her and I said
these are
Rockettes and who am I?
So
I sat
next to her. Well
I fell so much in love.
I was with all the Rockettes and their husbands
and boyfriends and stuff.
I felt like I'm really, I'm moving up, you know?
And I eventually got engaged to her and we got married.
We had four children and we still see each other.
I just talked to her Mother's Day the other day and all that.
That's nice.
It was very, very special.
And that was an interesting time there.
And a lot of those girls we knew.
In fact, that's when I first saw Steve Oniti.
Because it was one of the girls dancing one of the raquettes.
Her husband was Gene.
I think Bianco was his last name.
And he was a male harpist.
He would play the harp.
Big Italian guy. Young, too. And he was a male harpist he would play the harp big italian guy
young too and he was doing the steve allen show late at night and we all went over to see it after
work at the rock at the music hall and that's where steve and edie were just young singers
going together at that time way way way way back then those are the kind of some of the things we
did but getting back then years later i went on the things we did. But getting back then years later,
I went on the road with Andy the Crazy,
the Lions,
saved enough money,
paid off my debts,
got married and all that.
Now I'm working at Jim Downey's as a cashier.
And everybody came.
The actor's studio was a hangout for them because those people,
then you'd have tourists come in
to want to see the actors and stuff.
It was like the poor man's Saudis.
And Mr. Downey was always so great
so one day in comes i'm at back of the cashier's thing and there's a big wall and the bar was here
on the other side you enter and you walk down that and you can see who it is and they sit in the back
and i saw this beautiful creature there i I said, that must be Marilyn Monroe.
Well, she starts coming this way, this way.
And then I said, there's Eli.
Everybody loved Eli Wallach.
He goes over, and he sits right there.
I'm over here.
They're right there.
I couldn't believe it.
He said, Gavin, come on over.
He says, I want you to meet my wife.
I said, I know who she is.
Amazing.
I said, you know, boy, I said, I was like 23 years old, 24 years old.
I said, boy, you're more beautiful in person
than you are on the screen.
He'll be, thank you so much.
You know, she had all powder.
It was that part she had, she didn't put,
she was just powder.
It wasn't a lot of eye makeup or stuff like that.
She was just powder, and she was so beautiful.
And he was talking, he introduced us.
He said, he's a young actor here.
He's going to go far and all this kind of stuff.
And she's, I said, you know,
this is just a wonderful moment for me.
I said, you know what I'm going to do after work tonight?
I said, I get off at one o'clock in the morning.
I got to go and add up all the bills and payment, all that.
You know what I'm going to do after that?
She said, no, what are you going to do?
I says, I'm going to call all my friends and tell them I met Marilyn Monroe.
She was beautiful.
So sweet.
A couple of years later, I'm a 20th century Fox.
I'm shooting something with Blake Edwards for High Time with Bing Crosby.
Oh, yeah.
You go in the makeup department.
Everybody sits there.
for high time with Bing Crosby.
Oh, yeah.
You go in the makeup department, everybody sits there, and that's, so now I go,
and she was shooting a wonderful movie.
Anyway, she was shooting something.
So I was walking down to my soundstage,
and her limousine was coming past that she was in.
And she looked out and the difference was night and day
the Marilyn Monroe I met was genuinely a beautiful skin everything and here she was made up at 20th Century Fox
with the beauty mark they paint on here.
My friend Whitey Snyder designed that for her,
that beauty mark she had here.
And, you know, I said, I met the real person.
This is the movie star.
It's a big difference.
How about that?
Yeah.
Big difference.
Since you brought up
Blake Edwards
another guy
I mean I know you got
close to Robert Wise
but Blake Edwards
was another guy
who was pivotal
in your career
he really
yes
especially at that
turning point
where you
where you were
you would move to LA
and you lost that part
in the Hell March pilot
and you were despondent
yes
and I never sold it
right
and then Blake Edwards
was on the phone, right,
and asked you to do the Peter.
Was it the Peter Gunn pilot?
Can you imagine being Peter Gunn pilot?
I was fired.
I had rented a car, everything on that job.
And I didn't get a chance even to show him anything.
The guy, they didn't want me.
He wanted his friend that turned out to play
the part i can understand that but but for me i was 20 in my 20s i had to get back in the car
and go and tell my agent i was fired i had to tell my wife i was fired harry guardino was very
understanding harry guardino? Oh, man.
Harry and I were very close friends. We used to be on the road together when it had full of rain.
Anyway, so I'm getting out of here.
New York is the place for me.
At least you know if they're going to lie.
They're lying.
They don't two-faced.
And I said, we don't belong out here.
These people aren't real
and then about a couple of hours later after I was very self-indulgent thinking I wasn't
any good anymore the phone rings that's my agent he says uh do you know who Blake Edwards is I said
well I know who he is I never met him and everything else I used to send them pictures
when I was doing my play I'd send out pictures he says he wants to see you he's doing a thing
called peter peter hunt peter gunn peter peter gunn yeah with craig stevens wasn't it peter hunt
was an artist in cape cod i know this is what happens to the brain. I said, oh, good.
I can go see him.
I said, I have my car.
Because I rented the car.
I said, should I wear my hairpiece?
He says, no, just bring it.
So I always had it with me.
And so I go in.
When they got the hair in the box and everything else,
and I see a guy sitting there with a full head of hair,
he became a leading man with Donna Reed.
Eventually, Paul, somebody. I said, what am I with a full head of hair. He became a leading man with Donna Reed. Eventually, Paul, somebody.
I said, what am I doing here?
Look at me.
I'm a character man.
This handsome.
What am I doing here?
So I went in.
They saw Blake.
And I saw his assistant, Dick Crockett, who, ironically enough, he was bald, too.
And he had done some stunts for me on U.S. Marshals, these other shows I did for Desi Lou at one time.
for me on U.S. Marshals, these other shows I did for Desilu at one time. So he says,
we rapped and rapped and rapped and told him I did I Want to Live. His father was the company manager on that. His name was Mick Edwards and Blake changed it to Edwards. Right. And
we started talking about my career and everything and he said, you know something?
career and everything and he said you know something he said you know i really want you to do this pilot i said wow you know what's the part he said well it was going to be an italian
i'm going to make him irish so you can play him we'll call him phallum you can play him
and he said he's going to be the first heavy ever to play squash on television.
I said, how do you play squash?
I didn't even know how you play it.
He said, oh, it's going to be fascinating.
So anyway, that was the beginning when I first met Blake
and Herschel Bernardi and Craig Stevens and Hope Emerson
and all those.
Oh, we love these names.
All those wonderful people and the music and hank
mancini oh yeah boy that was the first big breakthrough there and then um but he used you
a lot and that was just fabulous you know it's just fabulous and then they sold that it's true
that they said at that time that pilot was sold faster than any pilot ever it was very different
the music was different shots were
different sure they were long scenes they were not just long shots close-ups they were long the
camera you rehearsed a long time and the camera did all the movement blake did a great job and
so i did a lot of those tell us about the voice of the tuna fish for all these years that was that was that was herschel bernard yes oh yes
oh yeah yeah only yeah you know what he used to tell us i love that job because it's the only job
i've ever had you don't have to get dressed for i can go down in my pajamas and do it
he used to live in a lake some places i just go down in my closet i don't care
well you know they say next to zero his tevye is the best oh yes yes
tevye yeah he traveled all over for it yeah he was a wonderful wonderful person i didn't know him
personally you know but i but i worked with him and he was
so wonderful and great and all that and as a matter of fact my stepdaughter played his daughter
on a series called arnie sure i remember that sue ann langdon was the wife sue ann langdon right yes
and stephanie steel was the daughter about that she was doing that when I was doing the Mary Tyler Moore show.
How about that?
She was 16 making more money than I was.
Don't tell everybody.
You remember that show, Arnie, with Herschel Bernardi?
Yeah.
Oh, Sue Ann Langdon was great, too.
I loved her, too.
I loved working with her.
Well, Gilbert got a kick out of this question about,
we were talking something from your book about Blake.
You said you were almost cast as Mickey Rooney's character
in Breakfast at Tiffany's?
Oh, yeah.
Or you were up for it?
Oh, yes.
You'd be surprised how many parts I was up for.
Oh, boy.
Yeah.
And also Max and the Great Race, the Peter Falk part.
Absolutely.
Oh.
Absolutely.
Amazing.
If Blake was alive, he'd tell you that.
That's how I know about it.
Wow.
Wow.
Oh, yeah.
And then he also did, I don't know.
I went over.
We did the Peter Gunn pilot.
And then there was a series called Steve Canyon based on the cartoon character.
Yeah, and one actor that played the lead only had four fingers, I remember.
It was kind of strange shaking hands.
Anyway.
We also remember you in The Party.
I always kept looking for the other one, huh?
Gilbert and I were talking about The Party, too,
which you did with Blake and Sellers.
Oh, The Party, everything was ad lib.
They had me the...
Which happened first, The Party or High Time?
In 1960, we did High Time with Bing Crosby.
Yeah, the party came later.
I played the nutty professor.
It gave Jerry the idea.
He did a whole movie on him.
Yeah.
And then the other one.
Wait, how did the nutty professor come about?
I played the nutty professor on the High Time.
If you look, see High Time with Bing Crosby.
Love is wonderful the second time around.
That's from that show.
High Time, that was one of Blake's favorite movies.
And you know who else loved that movie?
Frank Sinatra.
Interesting.
Oh.
I was doing The Love Boat years later.
And I got to work one day and Frank Jr. was there.
Oh, how great to meet you.
And that's when I met his father.
It's a long story.
But he says, my father loves high time.
I said, is that right?
He says, I'm going to have a screening in my house.
Come on, Gavin, you got to come.
So I went to Junior's place and we watched high time on the big wall,
you know, huge big wall.
Frank Sinatra loved that picture.
And so did Junior. It's a picture about a bunch of
college kids tuesday well the tuesday wells in it right fabian's first movie and things like that
and bing crosby plays the howard johnson's kind of character who says i never went to college i'm
going to go to college and he got and his kids are stuck up rich he goes to college he falls in
love with the french teacher, Nicole Moret.
Love is wonderful the second time around.
That's when he sings that.
Oh, it's wonderful.
And I played this nutty professor who does experiments
that all explode and stuff like that.
And then, oh, I remember, Bing was pledging for a fraternity,
and they made him dress and a big cotillion dress
i have that picture and i played this nutty professor and i danced with him right i spent
about four hours dancing with the book how many guys could say that
and jerry got inspired by the character that you played yes yeah. Right. Anyway, so after that came really the fun show with Peter Sellers
when we did the party.
Yeah.
We were just watching it last night.
I think the opening of that is almost some of the funniest five minutes
of the opening of any movie I've ever seen.
Just Peter and those guys shooting.
He's like Gunga Din to take off.
Son of Gunga Din.
Yeah.
Right.
And this guy, he sits on the thing.
Yeah, the plunger.
Everything explodes.
They had one set.
It all explodes.
That's great.
And they're going to kill him.
I'm the producer.
I'm going to kill him.
I remember.
And he gets an invitation to a party
by mistake and he comes to the party and it's what happens at the party with him all that stuff
and all those scenes were ad-libbed Blake gave me about five pages with an outline and we all
ad-libbed and rehearsed and shot like Jerry shot that was a it was a wonderful picture. Peter was very, very, very interesting to work with.
And Nancy Sinatra told me she was up for the lead part.
Nancy is my neighbor here.
And she told me she was up for the part.
And Nicole, what's her name?
Andy Williams' wife.
Oh, Claudine Lange.
Claudine Lange got it.
Right.
Yeah.
Right.
Interesting.
I had heard Peter Sellers was one of those actors who if he wasn't in character, it's like he didn't exist.
Oh, I wouldn't say that. Well, don't ask me because I like people, but he was just himself, and himself was a different kind of,
his characters were all kind of extreme.
Even when you think about all of the characters he played,
he had really, really great takes on every one of them.
You should see The Party because you should see
what he does with him.
He plays this Indian actor.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Everybody in that movie's funny.
And Steve Franken, too.
The late Steve Franken. He says that one scene near the end
we almost broke up because of the ad libs
we do he and Claudine
and I were there when I had her I was taking her
away from him and I said you're my
sugar
I am not your sugar
we didn't know he was going to say that.
Tell us about Kelly's Heroes, Gavin.
Anything about Rickles?
Any memories of Don?
Oh, don't you love Don Rickles?
God, he was so funny.
It was, well, let me see.
Brian Hutton.
Yeah, right.
Brian Hutton, he was an actor.
And I had seen some old Perry Masons and all those little things,
little parts, big parts.
He was on his way.
And Brian started directing movies, first television things and so forth.
And then he called me for one thing.
I couldn't do it.
I was tied up. But then he called me for one thing would i couldn't do it i was tied up but then he called me for kelly's heroes in yugoslavia and he told me the lineup of actors i
said oh my god to be with telly wow wow wow and donald sutherland wow and clint eastwood look at
this and don rickles are you kidding me that was the beginning of it all
the rest of the character men are incredible so I went over there to uh I remember when I was going
on the airplane it was when what's his name landed on the moon for the first time oh I'm Neil Armstrong
and and you I'm strong there there's this clip uh Frank and I have watched it and it's
There's this clip.
Frank and I have watched it, and you're on the- Oh, you're going to talk about him and Robert Blake singing?
Yes.
On the Dinah Shore show, you and Robert Blake sing a duet.
You remember this, Gavin?
Oh, yeah, I remember that.
I've seen that on occasion.
It's on YouTube.
It's classic.
I forget what the song was.
You sang It Should Have Been Me with that real fine chick.
It Should Have Been Me. Da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da- saying uh it should have been me with that real fine chick me yeah yeah it's all like he was uh we were very very close we're still close he spoke to me a
couple of weeks ago and uh he was my one daughter's godfather he's a wonderful guy and they just did
a special 2020 i came down here i spent hours with these people, showing them our scrapbook together,
the plays we'd done, and talked about how much he loves God and everything.
And they cut all that out.
And he called me.
He says, I'm so sick you did this because I asked you to.
And all they wanted to do was talk about the murder, you know.
And he's a wonderful, wonderful guy.
I'm crazy about him.
So you've been friends with him for a while.
Since I've been friends with him since 1957.
I've been through the first marriage.
I took him down there when he went to shoot that picture with Redford and Natalie Wood.
We took him down to the train station so he could go to a location.
And that was the Tennessee Williams piece.
I forget it was called.
Although Robert and I have always been very, very close.
I see the real person there.
Then, unfortunately, a lot of people haven't.
It's interesting.
It's very interesting.
Tell us about another close friend.
Tell us about Ted Knight.
Oh, I know you adored him. I could cry over Ted uh we we love him too we never got to meet him we
had Ed here but you you would uh you would uh he was like my big brother when I came out here
uh when the play after the play closed I came when I closed in Boston I came out to the West Coast. I had one connection.
So I went to the connection, Lou Erwin, the agent,
and there was a guy named Ted Knight there.
They introduced us.
I said, how are you?
Nice to meet you and so forth.
He says, are you new here?
I said, I just got here yesterday. He said, oh, the first thing you got to do is you need a business manager.
I said, yeah, but don't you need money for a business manager?
He said, yeah.
I said, I don't have any money.
He says, neither do I, but I have a business manager.
I said, who is he?
He says, Sam Cholkoff.
I went and met him, and eventually he was my business manager.
But that was meeting Ted for the first time.
And we had the same agent at that time. He was seven years manager but that was meeting ted for the first time and we had the same agent
at that time he was seven years older than i was his name was thaddeus konopka i spoke at his
funeral and uh he was one of the most talented actors i saw him on the stage to inherit the wind
oh you said that in the book that he did a great Hornbeck in Inherit the Wind.
I'm telling you.
Yeah.
And then he also did in The Compulsion,
and that play, too, he played the head cat.
It was fabulous, and there's so much authority.
Ted was a wonderful actor,
and to think that he would finally be Ted Baxter,
because they were thinking about young people to play that.
They thought about Jack Cassidy,
because he had just done He and She, that series.
Sure, wound up playing Ted's brother on the series.
An ego kind of model-looking kind of guy.
And they had seen, I guess, 200 and something people.
And Ted saw them once.
And then they called them in again.
So he told me on the way in,
it was on Hollywood Boulevard. He looked in the window and
he saw a blue blazer and he stopped the car. He said, I'm going to get that blue blazer.
He bought that blazer. He put that blazer on. He went in, read for the second time.
He was the last one cast of the original five people on that show.
last one cast of the original five people on that show and that was the beginning of ted playing playing that that character but he had done voiceover work for you the voice of superman
on all those things and versatile guy he even did he even did a modeling and the newspapers
they had a thing called night and day if you had gray hair and you wanted to make it dark,
you could make it dark.
So he had an ad.
Half his head was black and half his hair was gray,
like in real life.
But yeah, Taddeus Konopka, he's buried up there in the hills there.
And then his wife Dottie just lasted about a year and a half after him,
and she spoke at that funeral too
was what did he find did he find the typecasting of the character difficult Gavin to he had trouble
playing I'll tell you what was difficult I think that could have been the beginning of the cancer
I really I'll tell you what happened because he he would tell me things he wouldn't tell anybody
else because it wouldn't go any place and he told told me, he says, I can't stand it.
He says, Ted is so popular.
It's the same name as me.
I walk into restaurants and say, hey, Ted.
And they start pointing, and they start making fun of him.
He was Polish.
He was not used to being made.
He was a very strong man and it started
to eat eat all the disgrace six it's interesting about people's careers sometimes their careers
can be like this but their personal life can really suck you know and then vice versa and
there's certain things you have to deal with that maybe are too difficult to deal with and the fact that his character was called Ted
just like him
started to eat it
and then he had those two series
after the Mary Tyler Moore show
and we knew he had this
he just told Patty and I this cancer
and we suggested these places that we know about
with Laetrile and all this, where they can help you.
He got help for a while, but we never told anybody.
And then it came back again.
What a shame.
And that last time I saw him, he gave his life to Christ,
which is great comfort for me.
A wonderful actor, a wonderful comedian.
A wonderful comedian. The timing of everybody on that show.
I look at them now, watching the episode with you and Barbara Barry,
who we had here as well.
Oh, yes.
The I Love a Piano, where Murray thinks about straying.
I love a piano.
Since you're talking about this subject, you know,
Joyce Bolivant that played my wife.
Yeah, we love Joyce too.
We see each other all the time.
It sounds like we're going to be having a project together.
Great.
Marie and Marie.
Marie and Marie.
Yeah, where are they now?
And I remember we had Ed Asner and John Amos on.
Oh, we had John here too.
Yeah.
And both of them said every take Ted Knight did was like different than the last one.
Well, Ed said you guys used to go and sit in the bleachers and just watch him work.
Well, yes, when we weren't in the scenes.
Yeah.
I used to sit and watch Mary work.
Uh-huh.
And Valerie work and Cloris work.
Yeah, what a cast.
Yeah, I mean, we had some wonderful actors on that show.
What a cast.
Looking at, too, I was watching the episode yesterday,
Mary's Three Husbands,
where you have the fantasy that you're married to Mary
and you're a successful playwright with jet black hair.
I've never seen that.
It's so wonderful.
You've never seen it?
I've never seen that.
It's on YouTube.
I'll send you a link.
Thank you.
It's wonderful.
I would love to see that.
It's wonderful.
I remember the still of us, the old age makeup.
When she was married to Murray, wasn't she always pregnant, having a baby?
Yes, she goes in the bedroom and says, I'll be right back,
and gives birth and comes out with a baby.
And the baby has your hair, has a big shock of black hair.
Oh, what a wonderful show that was.
How about Chuckles Bites the Dust?
Yes.
I was telling Gilbert that Jay Sandrich
didn't want to direct that episode
because he thought death wasn't funny.
Death is not funny.
Amazing.
And they got Joan Darling, this actress.
Yes, sure.
Great opportunities, the females there.
And she won an Emmy for you get an emmy emmy
for it wow we were out of the big big function last year out here people from all over the country
and we're dining with people we never met before and one guy says to me he said you know what's
the funniest half hour on television i said i think i know what you're going to say he said
it's chuckles bites the dust i said oh yeah written by the great david
lloyd great david lloyd right and he had some great play great people oh yeah stan daniels
and you were yep you worked with carrie grant oh yeah oh operation petticoat i was in my 20s yeah
it was 1957 and we did uh operation petticoat. Again, Blake Edwards.
That's right. I must have been a great heavy. He cast me in these funny characters.
I was
this, yeah, I went over to pick up this
Steve Canyon script
and the car stops. It's Blake.
He said, I was just talking about you.
He said, I'm going to be at so-and-so's
office. He said, come on down. I got a part
for you in Cary Grant's new movie.
I said, wow, I have to. Okay. So I did that so's office he said come on down i got a part for you in carrie grant's new movie i said wow i have
to okay so i did that and i met the producer and all that he says he wants me to play this guy
hunkle i hadn't even read it yet and people still remember those big scenes oh sure telling you
with tony and me oh sure and i represent princess cruises
and i go out frequently and i have big audiences there and they want to know the stories and one
day i'm there talking and we were on our way to hawaii and a guy says any i said any questions
he says how's um how's mabel
i said how's maybe i'm thinking was I married to somebody called Mabel
I don't know he said
no no Operation Petticoat
remember on your chest
they tattooed this naked girl
on my chest so I was afraid
to go home to my wife and I re-enlisted
it was a funny funny
thing and Cary Grant
what happened with Cary Grant was 25 years after we did that picture,
the love boat is a big thing.
And they're having a big function to raise money
for the new art museum downtown
that my boss, Doug Kramer, was involved in.
They said, hey, we got a great way to make some money.
When the ship comes in, the princess ship comes in,
let's have a big function on that ship we'll bring out these high rollers you know and they'll have an evening on one of
the pacific on the on one of the ships and they'll meet all the aaron spelling uh people and so that's
exactly what we did we went there i have my was with my wife and my daughter. We go down. And all these people come in.
And we shake hands with everybody coming in.
And after about two hours, we're finished with all that.
And we said, we'll go to the dining room.
We go to the dining room.
We're sitting.
And we're having a great time.
And all of a sudden, main door, in comes Cary Grant,
who's like 83 now without white hair.
Oh, yeah.
Without glasses.
And everybody stops.
I mean, it's Carrie Grant.
And Patty says, there's Carrie Grant.
I said, no kidding.
Nobody's eating.
They're all watching him.
She says, watch where he goes.
He walks past us.
He's going over to sit over there.
I said, doesn't he look great god I haven't
seen him for 30 years boy he still looks great she says I want you to introduce me to him I said
what she says well you worked with him I says how naive can you be that was 25 years ago he doesn't
know who I am and my daughter said said, please, Pop. And my
wife says, I'll never ask you for another
thing. You know you're in trouble when you use
that line.
So I say,
oh,
okay.
Okay.
Let's go. So did you ever see
these cartoons where like the heart is
coming out of your chest? I felt like the heart is out coming out oh sure
i felt like my heart was gonna go like just hold it in i said god give me the right things to say
so here we are we got he's talking to his wife i go over excuse. Grant. He looks at me.
He says, Gavin, Gavin, Gavin, I'm so proud of you.
I tell you, if I didn't have those things on,
then I would have gone right in my pants.
I didn't want to get back to that, but that's one of those moments.
Oh, nice.
I said he, no.
And I introduced him to my wife and my daughter.
And I forget what else we said.
I met his wife.
Wow.
And here he was.
He's an older man, 83 years old, younger than I am now.
So this is the end of the story.
We go in there, and I couldn't sleep.
I said, can you imagine?
He was so nice.
This giant was so nice to you and everything.
Remembers you all these years.
Two weeks later, he was in Davenport, Iowa.
He was traveling with certain movies.
He would tell stories.
You know, Gregory Peck did it too.
Yeah.
And answer questions and stuff
he had a stroke and died yeah the lesson for me was you better risk
because if i didn't risk not knowing what he would say oh bald get out of here who are you?
If I didn't risk, for the rest of my life, I would have said, why didn't I do it?
I had that moment, and I didn't do it.
Sometimes we're given moments in life, like this interview.
We're thrilled to be put in the same category as Cary Grant.
But your daughter and your wife deserve a lot of credit for egging you on. We're thrilled to be put in the same category as Cary Grant. But, you know, your daughter and your wife deserve a lot of credit for egging you on to do that. Yes, they did.
If they didn't do that, I don't think I would have done it.
Yeah.
What a beautiful story.
Yeah.
But then that was the lesson.
And I've talked about risk to other actors all those years after that.
Because if you don't risk, you're never going to gain.
You're not going to.
Oh, that's my ear doctor.
Oh, that's right.
I got to see him tomorrow.
Oh, that's so funny.
I can't.
My secretary's got to get it.
Why don't they pick it up in the other room?
Sorry about this.
It's like a running monologue.
That's okay, Gavin.
We will return to Gilbert Gottfried's amazing, colossal podcast after this.
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Speaking of phone calls,
we got somebody here for you, Gavin.
We're hoping you can hear him.
Is he there?
It's him.
Gavin McLeod.
Gavin McLeod.
I cannot tell you how much I love you.
You are the best actor I ever met. You're the most incredibly wonderful human being.
You're my dear friend, and I love you so much,
especially when you came on the love boat.
I was no longer the
oldest member of the cast.
I've got some new depends for you.
These are really going to work.
Gabby, can I tell a depends thing?
Okay, first... I already told him the depends thing. First, let I tell the Depends thing? Okay, first...
I already told him the Depends thing.
First, let me tell the audience.
Doc from the Love Boat, Bernie Capel.
Bernie's here.
My favorite doctor.
Okay, so anyway, three years ago,
the Love Boat cast was doing the Rose Parade.
So Gavin comes up in a very secretive way, and he puts his hand into a big bag, and he says,
Vern, I said, what?
He says, put this on.
I said, what is it?
He says, it's the male version of Depends.
And while you're waving, you could use the Depends thing.
Reluctantly, I put it on.
For three hours,
I didn't use it
because I was so concerned
about making a mess.
Gabby, I love you, baby.
I interviewed Stodd started with this story.
Really?
But it's good to get two versions of it, Bernie.
Oh, yeah, well.
It shows you how important it is at our age.
Oh, God.
I love you, Bernie.
Oh, God.
I love you, sweetheart.
I heard you were in Alaska. I ran into a couple the other night that saw you, Bernie. Oh, God. I love you, sweetheart. I heard you were in Alaska.
I ran into a couple the other night that saw you in Alaska.
Yes, I was in Alaska.
Yeah, lots of crabs, and it took me months to get rid of them,
but there you go.
Yeah, we went.
The most exciting part of Alaska was there was like 50 eagles in the trees,
and the guys on this fishing boat, they threw out fish,
and the eagles swooped down and got the fish in midair.
Some got the fish in the water.
So it was very, very exciting.
Very exciting.
Sounds like my ex-agent.
Let me tell you, not everybody knows this.
We did three pilots, but on the third one, they said, what are we going to do?
They almost dropped the idea of having a love boat.
Gavin McLeod comes on in the third one, and that sells it.
That sells it.
Wow.
I'm so grateful to you, not just for being an Alta Kaka, but also for helping me get the show on the air.
Did you guys have a history before Love Boat?
Oh, a big fan of his.
We met on McHale's Navy.
But we are both veteran actors.
I go back all the way.
I became a professional in 1961, if you can believe that.
And Gavin has been doing this for years and years and years.
And we used to sit in the makeup room, 7.15 in the morning,
look at each other, smile, and say,
We got a job!
That's right.
Some of the best scenes.
Some of the best scenes
ever are the scenes with the
two of us, the two alter cockers
talking about life and our situations
and so forth. I know.
Those were some of the nicest
scenes to play
without holding our hair pieces down.
Oh, that was just you.
What?
Gavin and I had a scene on the deck.
You know, I had an undetectable hair piece.
Until that moment, it was undetectable.
Gavin and I were coming on to Connie Stevens on deck. It flew right off right on the deck. The captain and I were coming on to Connie Stevens on deck.
It flew right off
right on the bridge.
You got the
wind is blowing
and the forward motion
of the ship
is going
and I'm feeling
something like a
on the top of my head.
It's like,
what the,
what the,
and the director calls,
cut,
cut,
and we have liftoff.
You look like a raven on his head.
At that time, I understand that you gave your hairpiece a burial at sea.
Is that true?
No, I buried it on a McHale.
I shot it and buried it on McHale's Navy.
I shot it and buried it on McHale's Navy. I shot it on the ground.
What an untimely death for that hippie.
Gavin, were you envious of all the fan mail that Bernie was getting from the ladies during the love boat run?
I know there was quite a lot of it.
No, I got two letters. Two letters a there was quite a lot of it. No, I got
two letters. Two letters a month is not
a lot.
So my
attitude about
skirt chasing and all that was
that I said, look, I'm a
seasoned, disciplined
professional. I look at the script
and he says, it's just
Doc chases Louise. And I said, well, I guess I gotta do it. It's at the script and it says, Doc chases Louise. And I said,
well, I guess I gotta
do it. It's in the script.
So I did it.
It was exhausting.
I'll never forget when
Bernie comes to me one day and said,
you'll never guess
who I'm going to play the opposite next week.
I said, who?
He said,
Juliet Prowse.
He couldn't sleep for four days
before they started that show.
He and Juliet Prowse.
I thought it really was going to manifest
into something else.
I had had a crush
on her for years and she'd gone with
Sinatra, so my feeling about her was
partial intimidation and partial lust so we got this scene we got this scene in bed and there's 50 people
you got the camera people you got the sound people and I'm just so concerned about this I
don't know if I'll be able to speak this is Juliette Prowse I'm in bed with. We're supposed to have an incredible night.
It's morning.
And she says, you know,
Charles Boyer had a sexy scene like this
with a very sexy girl.
And I'm saying to myself,
why is she telling me a story now?
I'm trying to concentrate.
So, and he said to the sexy girl,
you know, darling,
if possibly I get, how you say,
aroused during this scene, forgive me, please.
If possibly I don't get aroused, forgive me, please.
Juliette Prowse.
She was South African, wasn't she? Juliette Prowse?
She was South African.
Yeah, she was great.
She was married to John McCook.
Sweet, yep.
Sweet human being.
Before Bernie. Yeah. Most human being. Before Bernie.
Yeah.
Most beautiful legs in the universe.
Yeah, she was great.
And the softest, softest lips.
If Katrina's listening, I'm only kidding, honey.
Now, when you were with Juliette Prowse, did you wear your topange?
I thought you were going to ask me if I wore my toupee.
I did wear my toupee.
And it stayed on, and I was very grateful.
I didn't wear the pants on it because if anything happened, I said, well, that's life.
Bernie, what did you think of Gavin's musical bit?
His famous musical number with Cab Calloway and Ethel Merman.
And who was it?
Carol Channing and Della Reese?
That was Ethel Merman.
Gavin is basically, on top of being a phenomenal actor,
he has music in his soul.
He's a musician, and he had such joy in singing.
I was just sort of, I was awed by Gavin's singing.
Oh, thank you, Bernie.
I have now been handed my baton.
I am conducting the Pasadena Society.
You'll find one that you like.
Bernie, what were you doing in Alaska?
I was on a cruise.
Oh, on a cruise.
I was on a cruise.
Oh, you're right.
I was on a cruise to Alaska.
Right, right, right.
So you...
Because I...
I think they're just using the love boat people.
Well, oddly enough, for years, they had sort of kept us at arm's length.
And lately, they said, here, take a free cruise.
So take a free cruise, meet the people, be nice and schmooze.
And it's wonderful.
It's wonderful to be on those ships.
It makes me feel good because it reminds me of those immensely marvelous years that I had.
And I remember doing one of these morning shows,
Gavin and the rest of the cast and Teddy and Fred,
and the question came up,
with all the people you had romances with,
they said, who is the best kisser?
And right out of my mouth, I said, Gavin!
It was on a Today show.
I got so much mail, you couldn't believe it, Bernie.
Really?
Oh, yes.
Bernie Gavin would have gone there.
Gavin's got his baton out since you said he was musical.
Well, he better zip it up again because that's not...
Gary. I tell you, if you want to get serious for a moment,
I have been a little bit of conducting in my lifetime with Richard Kaufman.
I've traveled.
I've been with the Dallas Symphony,
the Florida Symphony, the San Diego Symphony.
That was a good one.
Wow. Even the cape cod symphony many
many years ago that was the smallest and uh yeah i do i do i i conduct and i talk and that's kind of
and i wear the depends so i'm safe we should call this the depends. We might be able to get a sponsorship.
Hey, Bernie, how about that?
The doctor and the captain.
But did you wear your hairpiece with those musical... Not there.
I wear it on my head.
Well, it keeps you warm in the wintertime.
Oh, what a treat to have the two of you guys here together.
This is great.
I love him.
He's wonderful.
This is great.
I've always had a great harmonious time with you,
and it's always in my memory, and I cherish it.
I love you so much his his wife had a great idea for for
the doctor and the captain to go to florida let's say an evening with the alter cockers
and we could just sit there and tell stories it's great i know we could we could go on
there's still time to do it you guys should should do it. You should put it together.
It's hard to remember those stories.
We've had you both on this show, and you've both done wonderfully in remembering those stories.
Thank you so much.
What a treat to have Bernie come in like this.
Wow, this really made it.
Thanks, Bernie.
It was Dara's idea.
We have to thank Dara.
Or was it Gilbert's idea?
Thank you, Dara.
You're such a beautiful lady.
Barbara Felden says you're so gorgeous.
We had Barbara Felden call in when we had Bernie on the show, Gavin.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, wow.
And wish him a happy birthday.
She was there in New Jersey.
He saw her in New Jersey, too.
Yeah, yeah.
Dara, the question I have for you, Dara,
is what are you doing with that Schmendrick?
No, I ask this sincerely.
I always seem to be grumpy all the time.
Yes, sincerely, he says.
He's all right.
I mean, if you're forgiving and all that, he's okay, I guess.
For a Schmendrick, you know, it's okay, I guess.
It's okay.
Bernie, we love you.
Thanks for chiming in, man.
Love you right back.
Gabby, I love you, baby.
And keep kissing, baby.
Keep kissing.
This was so exciting.
Exciting and new.
Yes, exciting and... Come aboard.
Captain Stubing
And Doc
Together again
And we have
Charles Fox here Wednesday
The composer of the theme
Oh really
Yes
Oh great
It's Love Boat Week
He did the Mary Tyler Moore
Song also too
Indeed
It's
Charlie Fox
It's Love Boat Week
Here on the
Gottfried podcast
Why not
That's great
Bernie we adore you
And we'll talk to you, pal.
Right back at you.
It's been a great pleasure, guys.
All the best, okay?
Thanks for chiming in, buddy.
Okay, you bet.
Thank you.
Bye-bye.
Love you.
Okay, Bernie.
What a kick.
Yeah, well, it's been an hour and a half,
and we talk so much about those Depends.
I'm telling you, I've got to go now.
Gavin, let's plug the book, which you wrote in 2013.
Oh, I have.
Listen, can I tell you about my book?
Go ahead.
Please do.
Oh, sorry.
Yes.
My book is called This Is Your Captain Speaking.
Great read.
You can get it any place.
And then I wanted to tell you about two more books
my daughter-in-law did a fabulous book who's going to make a great movie called blood on the orchids
takes place in hawaii and she did it before the last eruption and that eruption came it sounds
sexy but it didn't work out the eruption came and my son and her and the two kids lost everything they had oh so they had to move up
to to uh another area now but the book is prior everything she talks about in this book the
different parks and the the different things they do to make to live uh no longer exist what's it
called become a part of his blood on the orchids by by Jill Steele. Blood on the Orchids. And then there's another book that I think everybody should have called The Little Town Band.
It's written by a friend of mine in Cape Cod who conducts his own band in
Hyannis. And it's fabulous. And
it's a great story with a happy ending, and it's a feel-good kind of a wonderful, wonderful, wonderful book.
The Little Town Band.
He's got another one called The Little Town Christmas.
You'll send us that info.
You'll give us that info and give it to Dara,
and we'll promote it on social media.
Okay, Gavin, we'll promote all those books to our listeners.
I've enjoyed this so much.
The energy that you guys have, and to be able able to see you does make a big, big difference.
You know, are those teeth real?
Gavin, we love you.
Next time you come back, you'll tell us the story of when Betty Davis came to dinner from the book.
I do an evening on that.
It's a great story.
I'm going to do that as a play.
Yeah, when Betty Davis came to dinner, it was a disaster.
It's a great story.
It was all Kate Ballard's fault.
She said, she ran into her in a party.
She said, nobody invites me to dinner anymore.
Nobody invites me.
Well, I found out why.
It's a very funny
story and all of it's true too.
We'll save it so we can have you back.
Okay, that'd be fun.
Do you want to do the Tony Curtis, Gavin McLeod bit
for Gavin before he runs away? Tony?
Do you know he's been doing a bit in his act
for 40 years?
This is... Go ahead, he's going to do it for you.
Tony Curtis talking to Gavin
McLeod.
Hello, Gavin.
Hello, Tony.
How are you? I'm
fine. You want to
have some coffee?
Okay. I think
I'll have a donut too.
So you will have
two donuts? No. I will have a donut too. So you will have two donuts?
No, I will have a donut.
You are having a donut and I shall have the same.
So you will eat the same donut that I am eating?
No, I meant although we are both eating two entirely different donuts, the very fact that they are both donuts puts them in the same food group.
Are you saying like an apple and an orange are both in the same food group?
No, because the orange is a citrus fruit.
This is the highlight of my career.
Later, I have to tell you something you don't know.
You don't know, but when we were doing Operation Petticoat,
Tony had his own suite at Universal,
and he invited over for me to lunch every once in a while.
And one time he was getting measured for his costume
with Kirk Douglas, the Greek thing.
Oh, Spartacus.
Yes.
And we had donuts.
He was a wonderful guy.
Oh, boy, Tony was great.
What a moment.
I never met him.
I would have loved to have met Tony Curtis.
You would have loved him.
He was wonderful.
We had a lot of scenes we had, but in real life, too.
He's been doing this on stage for 40 years, Gavin.
Yes.
The same one.
Yes.
Well, thank you.
I never sounded so good.
I have to tell you, four stars out of four stars.
Gavin, we'll have you back.
We barely got into it.
There's so much. Yeah, I'd love to come back.
Let me know. Okay. You want to let these men
get to the bathroom?
This has been
Gilbert Gottfried's amazing
colossal podcast
with my co-host Frank
Santopadre and
the great Gavin McLeod.
Gavin, thanks so much.
That's so nice. Thank you so much.
Love, exciting and new.
Come aboard, we're expecting you.
We're expecting you.
And love, life's sweetest reward.
Let it float.
It floats back to you. A little love, soon we'll be making him all run.
The love boat promises something for everyone.
Set a course for adventure, your mind on a new lowland And love
Won't hurt anymore
It's an open smile
On a friendly shore
It's love
Welcome aboard in love.
Welcome aboard in love.
Gilbert Gottfried's Amazing Colossal Podcast is produced by Dara Gottfried and Frank Santapadre
with audio production by Frank Verderosa.
Web and social media is handled by Mike Lipadin, Greg Pair, and John Bradley Seals.
Special audio contributions by John Beach.
Special thanks to John Fotiadis, John Murray, and Paul Rayburn.