Gilbert Gottfried's Amazing Colossal Podcast - Mini-Ep #50: 70s and 80s Buddy Cop Movies

Episode Date: March 10, 2016

Each week, comedian Gilbert Gottfried and comedy writer Frank Santopadre share their appreciation of lesser-known films, underrated TV shows and hopelessly obscure character actors -- discussing, dissecting and (occasionally) defending their handpicked guilty pleasures and buried treasures. This week: Jay Leno teams with Michael Caine! Gilbert pitches a screenplay! And the Left Fist of David! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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You see, it's kind of a pun on the last name. Ah, never mind. Hi, this is Gilbert Gottfried, and this is Gilbert and Frank's amazing, colossal obsession. I'm here with my co-host, Frank Santopadre, and I have to speak like this, or else I won't remember the name of this thing. He's doing it phonetically. That's the second time I dropped that pen holder. We're here with Frank Verderosa. At Nutmeg Post. The name of that Las Vegas cop or dramatic musical show was, I think, Viva Laughlin. Viva Laughlin.

Laughlin. Viva Laughlin. Yeah. And apparently it was an Americanized version of an Australian show. It was a terrible show no matter what. Hugh Jackman, of all people, was behind it. It was hard. Hugh Jackman. Yeah. I said it like a New Yorker And Hugh Jackman, of all people, was behind it. It was hard. Hugh Jackman.

Yeah. I said it like a New Yorker. Hugh Jackman. I always say Hugh. Yeah. Hugh Jack. You have to say the H. Like a sense of humor.

That's the way I was. Two episodes and out for Viva Laughlin. And a lot of people wrote us. I did not write down all the names, but we thank you guys. We knew our fans would come through. And you said that some people found out the name of the Peter Lorre Vincent Price. Called collector's item

from 1958. Yes, you would, just to recap, you mentioned that there was a pilot. Did you know it was a pilot? Yeah, I knew it was made, and I thought wow, I mean, well, the two of us would have certainly have watched that show every week. I wasn't alive.

Yeah, but Vincent Price and Peter Lorre, I mean. Yeah, I found on IMDb it was a failed pilot. Mr. Prentiss, I guess Vincent Price played Mr. Apprentiss, who was an appraiser at the House of Prentiss. And Peter Lorre was Ivor Hager, or Ivor, who informs him of the left fist of David. I'm not going to ask about that. It's the left fist of David. A fist. There's so many things I could do with a fist.

I knew it. But then you'll have to wash the fist off afterwards, and it's an antique. Mmm, something about that makes me tingle. This is a valuable, mysterious art object, the left fist of David. Noah, you can work your own Danny Kaye references into this, too. You could have the left fist. I'd like the left fist and the right fist. Mr. Muntz, I don't even know.

I don't understand this. You could go to IMDb. First of all, the synopsis makes no sense. It ends with, after a mistaken poisoning of a cat. That's the last paragraph. Oh, jeez. Prentice and Muncie. I'm not sure who was Muncie.

I can't. I hate pussy. Oh, gosh. Look for this thing. I don't know if anybody can find it. I only found a couple of minutes on YouTube, but there's a synopsis on IMDb as we're reading. That makes absolutely no sense. So it was called Collector's Item.

And I have not watched it yet, but at one of my shows out of town, someone comes up to me and slaps down a DVD with that cartoon caricature of Bob Hope, and it's titled Joys. Oh, God. Yeah. Oh, so somebody found it and gave it to you. Somebody gave you a physical copy. Do you find that since we've been doing the podcast that you're meeting a lot of podcast fans on the road? that you're meeting a lot of podcast fans on the road?

One guy showed up at one of the podcasts wearing like a black man's wig. You mean at one of your stand-up performances? Yes, yes, yes. And he was in the audience wearing this black man's wig, like a shiny processed hair, and wearing a suit from the 50s. And he had something on his head. And he had built a little glass coffee table.

And on top of it was a Barbie doll sitting on the table and that plastic dog shit and it was like so it was wow his costume as some effort went into this oh my god i i really admired him i see the pictures on facebook i see you with the fans and you know people will write to me and say do you think gilbert would like it if i went up to him i mean you know here i am i I'm in Omaha or I'll get emails from, I'm in Ottawa, you know, and I'm going to go see Gil tonight at so-and-so. Would he, would he appreciate me, me walking up to him and giving him, you know, a statue of David Niven or these ridiculous things? I don't think I made that one up, but, but, and I And I see you posing for pictures. And you're getting Cesar Romero stuff?

Oh, yes. Yes. I got one, like, artwork of someone drew a sketch of Cesar Romero and the Joker makeup bending over and these boys hitting him with orange wedges bouncing off his ass. Yes. It's great stuff. Oh, let's see. So another thing I want to do, an update from last week, is that we were talking about cop shows from the 70s and 80s.

And, of course, we put it out there on social media. Please mention any ones that we forgot. Some people wrote in. I wanted to run these by you. Do you remember any of these? Do you remember a show called Sarge with George Kennedy as a priest who turns into a cop? It sounds very, very vague. Me too.

We just lost George Kennedy, by the way. How about Joe Forrester with Lloyd Bridges? Oh, the name Joe Forrester makes sense. These were suggestions from people. Chopper One. Kaz with Ron Liebman. Oh. Remember Ron Liebman?

Yes, yeah. From Where's Papa? Me too. And from Hot Rock. Hot Rock. Here are some other ones. Banyan with Robert Forrester. Now, Banyan, that title.

Not to be confused with Banachek. Yeah, Banyan, though, sticks in my mind, but I don't remember ever seeing it. I remember, this hits me, I remember seeing a TV movie where Lloyd Bridges plays a cop who killed someone. Oh, boy. who killed someone, and they wind up blaming it on this drunk played by Broderick Crawford. No kidding. I don't know this movie. TV movie.

Yeah. Don't know it. Now people are going to look that up and write to us and tell us what that is. Broderick Crawford and Lloyd Bridges. Yes. And I also remember, well, this one I remember the title, and that was seeing Bing Crosby and was it like Frank Savage or what was that guy's young actor? John Savage.

Not John Savage. Not John Savage? He was an early TV actor. Ooh. Could have been Frank Converse. Frank Converse. Yeah. Frank Converse, I think, was the—

From NYPD. Yes. The old show from the 60s. And this was called Dr. Cook's Magic Garden. Wow. Or Dr. Cook's Garden. I'm writing these down. out that Bing Crosby is the doctor in this small town, and he winds up tending to the town the same way he tends to the gardens. If there's a bad weed making the rest of the garden is

contaminating, he gets rid of it. Interesting. And so he's a doctor who is letting some people die or personally killing them. So it's got a supernatural element to it. Dr. Cook's Magic Garden. Yeah, or Dr. Cook's Garden. Don't know it. This episode is brought to you by FX's The Bear on Disney+. In Season 3, Carmi and his crew are aiming for the ultimate restaurant accolade, a Michelin star. With Golden Globe and Emmy wins, the show starring Jeremy Allen White, Io Debrey, and Maddie Matheson is ready to heat up screens once again.

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month, you can get some colossal benefits, access to new podcast episodes before anyone else, even us. Exclusive podcast merchandise, video hangouts, so you can see how beautiful we are. And just added, I will record a personalized roast of you and only you so you could share it with your friends. Me telling you what a schmuck you are. Go to patreon.com slash Gilbert Gottfried. That's patreon, P-A-T-R-E-O-N.com slash Gilbert Gottfried. And thank you for your generosity. You know what we should do in a future episode is we should do, because we've talked about this, we should do like ABC Movies of the Week.

Yeah. Because we've talked about how many we... That was Nicky by Burt Bacharach. Was that the theme from the ABC movie of the week? It was like his daughter, Nicky, you know, she was on the spectrum. She had like, I think, Asperger's syndrome. Right, right. And when she was 40, she committed suicide.

Yeah, yeah, she passed away. It was tragic. I don't know if this was before or after, but he wrote a song, Nicky, that I always remembered. I just loved the theme music. It always like— That's great trivia. Yeah. I didn't know that.

And it was like, you know, somewhere there is sunshine, somewhere days are warm, somewhere we can find a harbor safe from the storm. The ABC movie of the week. The Tuesday night. I looked up the lyrics to it. That is pretty cool. Yeah. So here's a couple others real quick. Hard Castle and McCormick.

Oh, that I remember the title. Sure. Kingston Confidential with Raymond Burr. Does that mean anything to you? No. A couple of people chastised us for not mentioning Ellery Queen with David Wayne and Jim Hutton. Which is not really a cop show so much as it's a detective show. But I guess it counts.

And what was the last one? Jigsaw John with your old pal Jack Warden. Oh, my God. Mean anything? No. And then somebody posted, since we talked about O'Hara with Pat Morita, the one you said even offended you. Somebody posted a picture of Pat Morita and Jay Leno in Collision Course. Yes.

Which was a feature, a buddy comedy, a buddy cop comedy. And I thought, well, it's a natural progression then from last week to this week. We should talk about features. Buddy comedies. And didn't Jay Leno also co-star with Michael Caine? Oh, in a movie called The Silver Bears.

Oh, yeah. Yeah. I think Jay had a small part in that. But do you remember Collision Course? Oh, yes. Have you seen Collision Course? Oh, yes. Have you seen Collision Course? No. Okay.

So let me do a little research and look up cop buddy movies. Yes. And the funny thing is it's really an 80s kind of genre. You don't see it. I could not find. So I'll ask our listeners to send us anything from the 60s or the 70s that could be classified as a buddy cop movie. And all I could find was Hickey and Boggs. Oh, yes, with the cast of I Spy.

I Spy with Bill Cosby and Robert Culp and Freebie and the Bean. Oh, yes, James Caan and Alan Arkin. Alan Arkin. I found Across 110th Street, which is a movie that pairs up Yafit Kodo and Anthony Quinn. Oh, yes. Which I recently bought at a store right next door. It sells used DVDs. Super Cops with, I think, Ron Liebman. Oh, yes. Yes.

Right. And that was like Super Cops came right around the cop phase, like after like Serpico and stuff like that. And they also had the new Centurions. Correct. George C. Scott and Stacey Keats. Very good. I didn't put that one on the list, but I remember it. And Electra Glide in blue.

Oh, my God. With Robert Blake. That's all I could find for the 70s. There was the seven ups. Yeah, yeah. I guess that's more like a team. That was more based on like the French Connection type of. Right, right.

I mean, that's a 70s film. There are not a lot. There's cop films in the 70s. But this specific thing that I was looking for coming out of Collision Course, the buddy movie. See, I'm... You don't see a lot of them. I'm working on writing a cop movie where one of them plays by the books.

Oh, really? And the other one's a wild man. Really? I don't think it's ever been done. Let me guess. Is there a commanding officer that's fed up? Who gets angry? Oh, I must have told you about this.

You told me. There's a commanding officer who's constantly screaming at them. Does he threaten to bust one and take his badge? Yes. We're simpatico here. And one of them beats

confessions and constantly breaks the rules. No kidding. And the other's an older cop who plays by the rules and is angry at him. But here's where it switches. What's the twist? Toward the middle and toward the end, each one of their personalities rubs off on each other. Oh, and they realize that the other one had something, had a point of view. And the guy who plays by the books realizes it's kind of fun to break the rules. And the guy who is always breaking the rules becomes more responsible.

I see. See, I'm telling you, I've revealed too much. You're not going to sell it now. Yeah. Oh, damn it. Now everybody will try to write it. Does it end with a freeze frame where everybody has a laugh? In fact, this is the problem I had when I revealed my romantic comedy about a girl who's just concerned with her job and has given up on men and a goofball who she hates but somehow wins her over. But he doesn't, let me guess, in your version, he doesn't win her over until she gets over the asshole guy. Yes. That she's dating from work. Yes. The boss who doesn't treat her well.

Yes. Isn't that in there? And I just got, well, I just got the finger. Okay. To wrap it up. Wait a second. So I'll be. finger to wrap it up. Wait a second.

I'm going to just put out to our listeners, because this is a short episode, because Gilbert's double parked. Send us the name of some cop movies from the 70s, 80s, and 90s, but specifically buddy movies, because we couldn't find a lot. I found

Dead Heat with Piscopo. Oh, God, yes, and Treat Williams. And Alienation with James Caan and... Oh, God, yes, and Treat Williams. And Alien Nation with James Caan. Oh, and wait, wait, wait. What's his name? Mandy Patinkin. Mandy Patinkin. And last one.

Do you remember Partners, where Ryan O'Neal was straight and John Hurt was gay? Yes. Yes. These were the 80s pairings. That was a fine film. And from the 90s, Cop and a Half with Burt Reynolds and a kid. Oh, yes. Yes.

Oh, God. And Stopper, My Mom Will Shoot with Sly Stallone and Estelle Getty. Oh, that was a good one. Yeah. Okay. So send us more. This is being a rushed episode because I'm being rushed. So this has been I'm Gilbert Gottfried with Frank Santopadre.

And this has been Gilbert and Frank's amazing, colossal obsession. You're like, it's like regarding Henry when he's learning to talk again. Which is going to be a whole other segment. Will do. See you next week. Here we go, boys. One, two, three, four. Give it a crash. Colossal obsessions.

Give it a crash. Colossal Obsessions Colossal Obsessions