Gilbert Gottfried's Amazing Colossal Podcast - Mini-Ep #60: Gilbert & Frank Answer Facebook Questions
Episode Date: May 19, 2016Each week, comedian Gilbert Gottfried and comedy writer Frank Santopadre share their appreciation of lesser-known films, underrated TV shows and hopelessly obscure character actors -- discussing, diss...ecting and (occasionally) defending their handpicked guilty pleasures and buried treasures. This week: Remembering William Schallert! Happy Birthday, Mr. Warmth! Gilbert meets Tiny Tim! And the story of the GGACP theme song! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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Squeeze more summer out of summer with Skip. Hi, this is Gilbert Gottfried
And this is Gilbert and Frank's amazing, colossal obsessions
with my co-host, Frank Santopadre, once again at Nutmeg Post with our engineer, Frank Berterosa.
Thank you, Cheech.
I love every time you do that opening where you go, hi!
I think of the Penn Jillette episode.
You went, hi high and he went hi
i we should start off this one i thought uh this has happened to us a few times oh i know where
you're going um uh we had booked on the show jack carter yeah one time which we were looking forward to. And then we got a call from his manager saying he's not feeling well.
Can we rearrange it?
And we had booked coming up in a day or so William Shallard.
Yeah, William Shallard, yeah.
Shallard, the great character actor.
And I think his son called up.
Brendan, his son, called us and said, well, we had him booked for a couple of weeks.
Yeah. And Brendan said, and here's a man who's who remains sharp.
Yeah. And telling stories and giving interviews well into his 90s.
And then his son said, I think I think dad is in and out these days.
It's going to be a difficult interview.
And, you know, you never know at 93.
But we said stay in touch with us and let us know if he, you know, if it subsides and he sharpens up again.
We'd love to talk to him.
He's a guy who did everything.
Oh, my God. And worked with Chaplin.
Yes.
Yeah, in that same production with Marvin Kaplan, interestingly enough.
And then we got word today, unfortunately, that William had passed.
So it's happened again.
Oh, yes.
But this is the nature of what we're doing.
We're the Grim Reapers.
Well, you know, just since we're not going to talk to him now, sadly,
we should say a couple of things about him and about his great career.
And he's in classic Twilight Zone episodes, The Trouble with Tribbles.
This is a very, very well-loved Star Trek episode.
He was the admiral on Get Smart.
I mean, he was very good friends with Walter Matthau.
Yeah.
He turns up in a couple of Walter Matthau things.
He's in Charlie Varick, which I've talked about. Yeah, I heard they used to socialize.
They socialized a lot. He was the president of Screen Actors Guild for a while. Just an
interesting man, an erudite man who had done everything. If you go to his IMDb page,
you won't believe how much he did. And he'd be playing dramatic parts and then also being in
sitcoms.
Yes, and he did commercial voiceovers.
I think he was the voice of a toaster.
I was the voice of a toaster, yes!
You guys could have bonded over that.
We have so much to talk about.
And he played Retired Man, one of the superheroes in Legends of the Superheroes.
Oh, wow.
Which is our mini episode that's up right now as we record this.
So there's a little strange symmetry.
But the man had done, and of course most famously known as the father on the Patty Duke show.
But he had done, he's in Singing in the Rain.
Oh, yeah.
Which I didn't know.
He had just done everything.
And he's one of those actors, once you see him, you'll go, oh, him.
Yeah, I mentioned to a couple of people when we had him booked and the name didn't mean anything.
And then, of course, if you show the picture, which is kind of one of the fun parts of this show.
Oh, yeah.
You know, I'll dial up a picture on my cell phone and I'll just hold it up and then everybody in the room will say, oh, that guy! Which happens with Jim Caron. Oh, yes.
Anyway.
That's why I was
originally going to call this show the
Before It's Too Late Show. Yeah, maybe it would have
been aptly titled. Yeah.
But we missed out on William
and our condolences to
his daughter-in-law
Alice and his son Brendan, as I mentioned.
And Diane Haley who was helping us, too, was a family friend.
And we're told he was a great raconteur, and we really wanted to talk to him.
So our loss.
And a quick mention of another one of our heroes,
since we did a 90th tribute to Jerry Lewis, a 90th birthday to Jerry Lewis.
Who turned 90 this week?
Mr. Warmth.
Oh! Don Rickles. Wow, that's right. Yeah, yeah. A 90th birthday to Jerry Lewis. Who turned 90 this week? Mr. Warmth. Oh.
Don Rickles.
Wow, that's right.
Yeah, yeah.
So happy birthday, Don Rickles.
Happy birthday, Don Rickles.
And do we even dare to try to get Don on the show?
Tough booking.
Yeah, that sounds like a tough booking.
And I don't know that he's ever done a podcast.
And I don't want to kill him either.
You're not starting to believe that stuff, are you?
Yes.
Just because Carla Lemley and Jack Carter.
So here's the thing.
When we did the 100th episode and we took calls at Sirius, I got a lot of emails and tweets from people who didn't get in.
Yes.
Which was odd because when we first started, there was no one on the line.
Oh, yeah, yeah.
And then people started pouring in and some people wrote and said, well, I didn't get my question in. Yes. Which was odd because when we first started, there was no one on the line. Oh, yeah, yeah. And then people started pouring in and some people wrote and said, well, I didn't get my question in.
That part was a scary part where we said, and we're opening the phone lines.
And the longest silence.
Well, we were looking at the guys in the booth and they were just shrugging.
Yeah, they were just like looking at each other.
Not that you couldn't have vamped for an hour.
Pro that you are.
So I said to Dara, what do you say we just post on Facebook asking questions from people and see if they have anything.
People that didn't get in or people that weren't around.
Anyway, here's a bunch.
So we'll try to get to as many of these as we can in 15 minutes.
You game?
Yes. And maybe if this catches on, we'll do it as a as many of these as we can in 15 minutes. You game? Yes.
And maybe if this catches on, we'll do it as a regular, I don't know, kind of a viewer mail segment.
So here's the first one from Eric Rine.
When you guys conceived of this podcast, was it your intent to preserve oral histories of old Hollywood,
or were you just trying to have fun on the air?
Oh.
We didn't really think about preserving memories. Never really thought about it. Both of
us are just, you know, two pathetic freaks. That about covers it. Yeah. Who watch way too much TV
and retain way too much knowledge about what we saw.
Well, we should also say it was the origin of the show,
because when you were on the road and you'd call me from time to time
and we'd just sit on the phone talking about Scatman Crothers for 20 minutes,
or be Benederich, and laughing.
And my wife would say, what the hell are you laughing at?
And, you know, you do original material on the phone for 20 minutes,
like a whole new set. And that's when D Dara Gilbert's wife stepped in and said you know
you guys got to do something with this and then that led to the podcast we didn't want to do
another show where with comics interviewing other comics oh yeah there's a lot of that around
not not to disparage well I originally wanted this show to be uh where I'd be in a car with another comic.
Really?
Yeah.
Maybe going and getting a beverage of some sort?
It's not a bad idea for a show.
But no, these are happy accidents.
You know that people love the show so much.
We were really just trying to find a way to sit in a room and goof around about things we cared about.
Oh, yeah. We'd say, hey, you want to talk to Geronimo Russo from The Godfather?
Or you want to go to Larry Storch's house?
Yeah, sure.
And there we are.
And it is these things like now I feel like I can call up, I feel like an idiot calling
up some old time movie star or comedian.
And now I feel like, oh, now I have a reason to.
Right.
As you like to say,
you went from the idiot being,
you're now playing the role
of the idiot interviewer.
Oh, yes.
Yes, which is what you thought
of them all those years.
Here's a good one.
Since you, you love this,
this guy, you planted this one.
Since you had Janet Gallo,
Janet Ann Gallo on as a guest,
have you tried for Donnie Dunnigan?
Yes.
Who played Basil Rathbone's son in Son of Frankenstein.
He is hale and hearty.
And he was the voice of Bambi.
Correct.
And a decorated war veteran.
Yes, a war hero.
Right, right, right.
So, yeah, I think we should definitely get Donnie Dunnigan.
Okay, so we will make that happen.
Maybe for a Halloween episode.
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That was from Perry Shields, because I didn't mention who wrote that question. But he was a... I remember all horror film lovers
hated him in Son of Frankenstein
because he was an annoying kid.
Okay, okay.
And when you see him and listen to him
and standing next to Basil Rathbone,
you go, no way in hell are these two related.
Mm-hmm.
Yes.
Well, wait a minute.
Is Donnie even a Brit?
No.
Oh, okay.
No.
He's American.
I think he's got, like, red hair or something.
Well, we should get Donnie for the show.
He would have great stories about Carl.
So this guy read your mind.
Greg, our friend Gregory Gonski writes, hey, Frank, thanks for doing this.
Can you talk about the ACP theme song?
My dad and I were curious about its origin.
It's a song called Vampire Strut.
A lot of people like that little piece of music.
When we were looking for something at the beginning, we were trying to find something.
I don't know.
It appealed to me because it was a little bit of surf music.
Oh, yes.
And I was looking for something.
Ideally, I was looking for something with a theremin or something that kind of had that sci-fi. Yes, yes. But short of that, I thought,
oh, like, it sounds like 77 Sunset Strip or Route 66. We wanted that kind of... It sounds like
something that would be in a really bad 70s TV action show. Right.
It's also got, yeah, it's also got elements of a little bit, like I said, of a surf movie.
Oh, yes.
In it, a little bit of Dick Dale.
It's called Vampire Strut by a guy named Bob Bradley.
And it's a terrific piece of music that worked out.
Yes.
It just, you know, it's funny how, even the thing with the title, too.
I mean, when you first say a title, it sounds kind of absurd.
Gilbert Gottfried's Amazing Colossal Podcast, which we chose out of, I think, dozens of names.
And a friend of mine said, the more you say it, the more it will become natural.
And that happened with the music, too.
Now I can't think of the show without hearing the opening music.
Here's another guy reading your mind, A.J. Belisle.
He writes, he had no idea, but he says, have you guys seen The Devil's Reign starring Ernest Borgnine?
I went into, I devoted a whole show to talking about The Devil's Reign.
Which we recorded weeks ago before this was posted and we'll post it next week.
And I'm not saying it's a good movie by any stretch, but definitely worth seeing.
Yeah, with Ernest Borgnine, kind of an all-star cast.
William Shatner, Kenan Wynn, John Travolta, Tom Skerritt, and Eddie Albert.
And John Travolta is in it for a second wearing a complete mask, and he just yells,
Blasphemer.
I have never seen it.
And when the movie came out, Saturday Night Fever was out and Travolta was a big star.
So this one theater was advertising John Travolta in The Devil's Reign.
Right.
I remember that.
I remember him being billed.
Yeah, and you don't see him, and you hear him say one word.
Even before Boy in the Plastic Bubble, when he was sort of not known?
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perfection for the love of god uh here's one from also from aj belisle uh are you and gilbert
hitchcock fans and if so uh what are your favorite Hitchcock films?
What do you think?
We just had Peter Bogdanovich on the show, and I was talking about Frenzy.
I'd have to stick with Psycho.
You like Psycho?
Yeah.
Really?
Yeah.
Even with the bad Martin Balsam falling backward down the stairs?
It looked like he's doing a little dance step.
I like Psycho.
Yeah. Yeah. I like Psycho.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I like Suspicion and Notorious. The weird part about Psycho is after this great ending where the corpse of the mother turns around and he's grabbed from behind and dragged with a giant knife.
hind and drag with a giant knife, then it switches over to, oh, God, what?
Simon.
Oh, Simon Oakland.
Yeah. Yeah.
As a detective.
Right.
Or a psychiatrist doing this long, completely unnecessary explanation.
A little like Dick Miller explaining the terror.
Yes, yes.
Right.
Here's a good one.
Frank, why were you so freaked out when Gilbert talks about the Japanese sex robot who looks like Scarcha?
This is from Joseph Dutra.
Was I that freaked out?
I don't think I would expect it from you at this point.
Still, if that Japanese inventor is out there, please let me borrow that robot.
If you're a Gilbert Gottfried fan, just pay him back for all the years of enjoyment he's provided for you.
Here's somebody.
Andy Nelson says, can we start a petition to have Gilbert become the new voice of Siri on the iPhone?
to have Gilbert become the new voice of Siri on the iPhone.
It would go about as well as our Colonel Sanders petition.
Here's one for you, my friend.
Maurice Bershtinsky, our friend who does a wonderful podcast called See Here,
which I have been on.
We all know of Gilbert's Way with a Song.
Yes, don't we?
Oh, geez.
But what is Gilbert's favorite musical?
Oh.
Do you have a favorite musical?
You know, I really do actually enjoy How to Succeed in Business.
Oh, with Robert Morse.
Yes.
Yes.
Yes.
That's a good one.
Yeah, Robert Morse.
And, oh, I think there's an actor in it named Lawrence Teague.
That sounds vaguely familiar.
Our researcher is not here.
He plays the nephew in the movie.
And he was also in West Side Story.
Really?
Yeah.
Lawrence Teague.
I think so.
Wow.
That goes right on a list with Skelton Nags.
Or as I call it, Canags.
Canags.
I think my favorite musical, well, I like the old ones, the Rodgers and Hammerstein ones that I grew up on, but I like all that jazz.
Oh, yeah.
Quite a lot.
Yeah.
Which we have talked about on this show.
Let's see, let's see.
Here's a good one from Shane Brown.
This one will throw you.
I have seen a photo of Gilbert hanging out with the late American porno actor Jamie Gillis.
Oh, yes.
Does Gilbert have any stories he can tell about Jamie?
Yes.
Keep it clean.
Okay.
One time we were sucking each other's cocks.
Oh, that story.
While a sheepdog
fucked us both in the ass.
Oh, that old song.
Do you know I was in an independent film
with Jamie Gillis?
Oh, yeah?
Yeah, called Space Avenger.
Alien Space Avenger.
Oh, wow.
I'm not proud of it.
Yeah, no.
Look it up.
I knew this woman who lived with Jamie Gillis.
And we used to go to the house for dinner.
And a lot of the food tasted kind of salty.
Oh, stop.
Okay.
Jamie Gillis was sort of like the Elliot Gould of porn, if you will.
Yes.
Yeah.
And Jamie Gillis,
we got into a conversation where he explained
to me that a large
amount of porn actors
are Jewish. Really?
Oh yeah, well Herschel Savage
was one. Was Harry Reams Jewish?
Harry Reams, yes. Interesting.
Ron Jeremy, I'm sorry I'm answering all this.
It's really revealing too much.
Yeah, I read a book about it once.
I never thought about that.
Yeah.
He said the girls are usually repressed Catholics.
Right, that would make sense.
And the guys are Jews.
What's her name was Jewish?
Was she not Nina Hartley?
Oh, maybe. I know Tracy name was Jewish? Was she not Nina Hartley? Oh, maybe.
I know Tracy Lords was Jewish.
Tracy Lords.
Here's one.
Jews and porn coming up next week.
By the way, name me one other podcast that can reference Tracy Lords and Simon Oakland in the same breath.
Here's a fun one.
This is from Patrick Izzo. I love this. Frank, both you and Gilbert
love old Hollywood and classic movies, and that's great, and I've learned so much. But
I've also wondered if your wives also share the same interest.
No.
My wife likes old musicals, and my wife likes Marilyn Monroe movies, like Gentlemen Prefer Blondes.
And she likes Bette Davis movies for some reason.
But she doesn't have this kind of, because, you know, she's not sick like us.
She kind of has a life.
And Dara is not into old movies.
Dara's into old pop music, fair to say.
Yeah, Dara used to work
in the music industry
and yeah,
she gets excited
when we go to
Joe McGinty's place
and we'll see
like an old girl group singer
or somebody from
the Brill Building.
That's what she's into.
I will say
one of my proudest moments
as a father
was my little boy when he was like one or two maxing
yeah he was like really little and uh he he was watching a three stooges movie a three stooges
short and he said very seriously he said shimp looks like looks like Lon Chaney Jr. in The Wolfman.
I love that.
And I thought, see, that's the proof of DNA.
That's it.
That's it.
No Maury Povich tests needed.
And you gave me a perfect segue since you brought up Lon Chaney Jr.
This is from Martin Boe.
Martin, M-A-A-R-T-E-N.
I believe that's a Scandinavian name, B-O-U-W.
If Gilbert ever got the chance to have interviewed Lon Chaney Jr., what would he have asked?
Oh, God, there's so many things.
That's a tough one.
Yeah.
Why did he pick up the furniture and put it down gently?
Oh, yes, yes.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I think I'd ask him, so would you like a drink?
Would you like a fresca?
Yes.
Ted Knight says in Caddyshack.
Here's an interesting one.
Did either of you, and we'll do two more, did either of you ever have an encounter with Tiny Tim?
Oh, Tiny Tim.
This is from Eucrid Suckatash.
Obviously his real name.
Tiny Tim I've met a couple of times.
I never met him.
Did you?
Yeah, yeah.
What was it like?
He wasn't that far off camera as he was, you know, not that far off stage as Han.
Where'd you meet him?
At the Stern Show?
Yes.
Yes.
That is where I met him.
Strange cat.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Do you remember when he married Miss Vicky on the Carson Show?
Oh, very strange.
What a big deal that was.
Yeah.
That they got married on the Tonight Show.
Yeah.
I think he came to a sad end, Tim, Tiny Tim.
And, of course, remember him on Laugh-In.
Oh, of course.
I remember, like, Dick Martin, like, staring at him as he's singing tiptoe through the tulips.
I lied.
A couple of quick ones.
Will Gilbert release an album of his duets?
Oh, it has to.
Has to.
You know, my future brother-in-law is a musician and he's
and he says, you know, I listen to the show. Maybe we can press something on the vinyl.
He's a vinyl enthusiast and he actually wants us to cut an album. I said, what about the rights?
Oh, you're just singing the Lords of Flatbush theme and an underdog. Oh, gosh. Okay, last one, last one, last one.
This is going to be...
Because coming up on a show, unless it's aired...
Which one?
That Tony Orlando.
No, no, Tony Orlando's in the hole.
We don't have that.
We don't have that one up yet.
Which reminds me, when does Tony Orlando wake up?
I can suss this one out
but when?
In the crack of dawn.
You don't say.
Why didn't you tell him that
when he was here?
Right after
the next day
I thought
oh fuck
I wanted to tell him that joke.
A great episode
with Tony Orlando
by the way.
And I sang
Tie a Yellow Ribbon.
A little sneak.
And our friend Frank Verderosa, who's here, put that on Facebook.
And boy, that was just a blast, that episode with Tony.
Oh, that was a load of fun.
And so we'll save more for a future of Viewer Mail episode.
So I'll wrap with one more.
This is from Michael Russo.
Can Gilbert really remember cheesy title songs
he heard once 30 years ago
or is that some kind of special effect
or showbiz razzle dazzle?
No, no.
I will have these things
get stuck in my head.
How do you do that?
Especially if it's a movie that I'm going to assume
you have not seen over and over again like Cinderella Liberty.
Yeah.
And you remember the lyrics.
Oh, yes.
To Nice to be Around.
How do you do that exactly?
I don't know.
I wasn't trying to.
And see, I think it's one of those things.
It has to be so completely unimportant.
And that's how it gets stuck in my mind.
If it's something you need to know, I don't know it.
You're one of those.
Yeah.
But I mean, you know, a popular theme song.
I mean, something from a movie that you tend to see over and over, people would understand.
But I'm assuming you saw these movies once.
And the other thing was you memorized the opening scene from Five Easy Pieces.
Yes.
Oh, no, excuse me, The King of Marvin Gardens.
Yeah, King of Marvin Gardens.
Which you saw once in 1972.
Promise to tell you why I never eat fish.
How do you do it?
I don't know.
You're a genius.
Yes.
You're a mad, twisted genius.
Okay, so keep them coming.
If you want to hear your name on the show, there's a lot of other questions here.
And if you send me that Scarlett Johansson robot, that'll keep me coming.
Now cut that out.
I wish I did a better Jack Benny.
More questions the next time we do this.
And maybe we'll do it once a month.
Yes.
If it catches on.
And maybe somebody will be nice enough to send us a viewer mail theme song.
Oh.
What do you think?
Yes.
So maestro?
Okay.
theme song. Oh!
What do you think? Yes. So maestro?
Okay, so this has been Gilbert and Frank's
Amazing Colossal
Obsessions. See you next time.
Here we go boys.
1, 2, 3, 4
Gilbert and Frank's
Colossal Obsessions
Colossal Obsessions
Colossal Obsessions