Girls Gone Bible - Jeanine Amapola & Madison Prewett Troutt | Girls Gone Bible

Episode Date: November 10, 2023

GGB GANG! HELP US GIVE A WARM WELCOME TO OUR GUESTS AND SWEET FRIENDS-- JEANINE AMAPOLA AND MADISON PREWETT TROUTT! Jeanine is the host of the  @HappyandHealthyPodcast and Madi is a Christian influencer, speaker, and author. We traveled to Texas to spend some time with these beautiful women of God and bond over our love for JESUS. We talk about singleness, dating, engagements, and marriage! We have a very vulnerable conversation about purity, saving yourself for marriage and sex within the context of marriage. Jeanine and Madi are incredible examples of Godly women and the best role models for girls to look up to. We really encourage you to follow them on their social platforms and follow along their faith journeys. @jeanineamapola @madiprew We love you guys so much. Jesus loves you more. -Ang & Ari if you’d like to support Girls Gone Bible 🙏🏻🕊️🤍 Paypal- https://www.paypal.me/girlsgonebibleinfo Venmo- https://www.venmo.com/u/girlsgonebible

Hi, GGB gang. Hi, GGB gang. Hi, guys. All right, well, as you can see, we're not alone, and we're in a different space. We are so happy to tell you guys what we're doing today. We have the beautiful, the incredible, the iconic Janine Amapola and Madison Pruitt Trout.

I can't believe it. This is the combo. Nobody knew that. Literally. No one was expecting this. We didn't either until last night, I think. Yeah, literally. Okay, so if you guys are watching this on Girls Gone Bible,

you need to go to Happy and Healthy Podcast. It's Janine's, and we filmed basically the first half of this. We talked about everything from our testimonies to... Friendship. Friendships, yeah, being a lukewarm Christian, living in the world versus living in Christ. And yeah, so go to Janine's. And then today we want to talk about all things Maddie and Janine. And so we traveled to Texas yesterday and me and Ari met them for the first time. We only have had one conversation before this and then we met them at a restaurant last night and you would think that like we had to break the ice or something

yeah no no it is instant like friendship for years it was such a beautiful godly divine combination between us and i'm so happy to be with you guys we love you so much we're so grateful thank you for having me on yeah and we're so grateful because we are at Hello Studio. So thank you guys so much for using our studio. It's so beautiful out here and we love Texas. Yeah. Oh, yeah. We're convincing them to move to Texas.

I'm moving here. I'm sorry. She said, I'm moving here. We keep telling her she's going to find her husband here. No, guys, we have a petition to keep Ari because we're losing my co-host and my best friend. No, I need Ari. They're taking her. We need her. I'm in Texas. My husband's we need you both in texas my husband's here what

do you guys my husband's here no this is the light side yeah this is the last this is the light side so um well let's first let's first talk about maddie's book because okay i talked about this in the last podcast but she she sent me her book. I'm not a reader. I started reading her book. You guys, I couldn't stop reading it. It freed me. It was just what I needed. And this season of my life, it is the most hands-down incredible book I have ever read.

It is, please, just trust me and read this book. It's called The Love Everybody Wants. Yes, The Love Everybody Wants. just trust me and read this book it's called the love everybody wants yes the love everybody wants i wanted to actually read a passage because oh she like made me emotional earlier when she was talking about i always really read this book look at the pages oh i highlighted no she like sent me messages and dm we just obviously all met but like she was dming me and she was like no maddie literally like this book is and i was like getting teary eyed. She was calling me every hour being like, I'm sorry, I'm calling you again.

Can I just read you something? Because our stories, we feel so similar in things that we've walked through, which is also just the power of the Holy Spirit. I felt like I was reading my own story. I laughed, I cried. I thanked God for bringing me this book. Please go buy this book. But there was a passage and it says,

I believe that a heart can be made whole and complete only by the one who created it. Anything else, a hookup, a relationship, money, followers will satisfy for a moment. But when those fail you, and they will, they leave you more empty and broken than before. My heart has been made whole because I found only one who can satisfy and complete it. Thankfully, I'm no longer driving by a guy's house and singing Taylor Swift songs. Desperate for love and attention, needing someone else to complete me. I now have healthy relationships and I'm no longer looking to others to fill in the blanks of my life. My purpose isn't a person. It's so much bigger than that.

It's bigger than me. It's my God-given assignment that only I can fulfill. And you know what? You have a God-given assignment too. Your life is no accident. Your life was designed with intention. It's only in living out our purpose in Jesus that we are ever satisfied. It's only through knowing his love that we are complete.

Maddie, that is so beautiful and it freed me oh maddie it's a true so good that's my best wind yeah today so maddie and janine are both in such beautiful times of their life janine is getting married in three weeks yep to the love of her life we're gonna get all into thatdie, you are about to hit a year of marriage. Me and Ari. I'm still over here. We're still walking with the Lord. We're waiting for our marriage. We're just hitting every single, dating, engaged, married.

We're just hitting single, dating, engaged, married. That is so cool. That's so unique. That's like the best steward book right there. No, literally. Shut up. That is actually really, really cool. So we want to um start off with your guys testimonies and whoever wants to go first i want to hear everything janine i am obsessed so we said this on the last

time um on the last one that i before even starting girls gone bible i was watching happy and healthy for a long time and i just remember when we, I told Ari, you have to go watch this girl. She is such a beautiful example of what a good Christian woman is. I have so much respect for her. I, and I just told you this off camera, but you have something about you that like, I feel so safe in your presence. You see Jesus in your eyes, you're calm, you're humble. Like you are bold and you speak with conviction while also being humble. You don't, you're humble like you are bold and you speak with conviction while also being humble you don't you're not seeking for approval for yourself you boast in in the lord and it's really incredible and another thing is is i sometimes it can be intimidating to watch other christians when you're just first walking in your faith which was i was doing and when i started watching your videos i

felt so safe watching you i love your vulnerability you are incredible don't make me cry i'm like that's my best friend we talk in baby voices too we do we want on this podcast thank you guys we'll spare you guys we will it's so cute you're so sweet thank you so much okay you go first me oh shoot i'm like okay how where do i begin um okay so i grew up in a christian household i feel like a lot of testimonies start that way um i'm one of seven I'm like, okay, how, where do I begin? Okay. So I grew up in a Christian household. I feel like a lot of testimonies start that way. I'm one of seven kids. My parents are both immigrants.

My dad's from Germany. My mom's from Guatemala and I was born in the States. And I think just from like a very young age, I was like very confused about my identity. And I think that's like the common thread throughout my whole life is I didn't know like where I belonged. I was like, am I like, even like with just like ethnicities and nationality? Like I know not a lot of people may understand that. But for me, it's very confusing.

I didn't know where I belonged. I was like, am I not German enough? I'm not Guatemalan enough. I'm born in America. And so I think that like spiraled this lack of identity and then got to high school. And I just instantly became a people pleaser that completely bled over into college high school I would say I was a very good girl I was like walking with the Lord I was in youth group I was serving I was singing I was doing the skits

and then um I was homeschooled growing up and then went to the University of Texas and I mean everything went out the window yeah it was like I went from being this like innocent girl who just like hungered for the Lord to just like literally just being like dented on tabletops, like, wow, you know, like I was that girl and not proud of that. But I basically just went there like very much with open hands of like, okay, I need people to tell me who I am. I didn't know who I was. Um, I realized my, my relationship with the Lord was like very surface level. I didn't know who I was. I realized my relationship with the Lord was like very surface level. I didn't really read the Bible. It wasn't consistent.

I was very much into like rap music. So that was like my number one thing that I always listened to. And just constantly throughout college, I was like partying and like making out with random dudes on the weekends. Like even though I would still call myself a Christian, I still called myself like a good girl. Very much double life. I was in a Christian sorority for a semester. I tried young life and it was like, I was trying to find my footing. I was trying to follow God, but also there was this part of me that was like so tempted. I would get yanked every weekend back

to the world. And, um, every weekend I just like forgot about my faith. Essentially it was, it was really sad. And then on Sundays I would be like, yes, Lord. Yes, amen, Jesus. And I always felt so convicted. I was like hungover and all the things. And then I got into a very, very toxic relationship in college, very manipulative, spiritually manipulative, you know, lost my virginity to this man.

And that also just caused me to spiral. And it just wrecked my identity even more because all of a sudden I was like, oh my gosh, I'm worthless. I thought my virginity was all I amount to. And he told me that so many things within that. And then move back to Dallas after college, same thing. I was trying to find my footing. I went to this church called the porch every Tuesday night and I would get fed up with, I get fed in the word. And then the weekends I would go do the same thing, rinse and repeat, partying, all the things I just like could not figure it out for some reason. I think I realized now looking back, it was because of the friendships. I didn't have anybody calling me higher, challenging me and pushing me towards Christ. Probably like one person, but she was

living in California at the time. So then I moved to California and, um, I'm like living with YouTubers. I'm like, I'm going to do the whole Hollywood thing. I'm like going to all the parties and all the things and celebrities and shows. And I thought I was like living my best life. Meanwhile, I'm actually living a life full of regret, creating more regret, creating more shame, creating all this guilt, same thing, partying on the weekends, professing I'm a Christian online. I mean, people knew I was a Christian, but it was just so hard. Like I wanted to know God so badly. Like I always kept being like, God, like I want to know you, but I just couldn't get there on my own. And again, it's because I didn't have anybody to help me get there. And so I got into this relationship and meanwhile getting in this relationship, I got plugged into a church.

And so somehow, by the grace of God, I met these girls. They invited me to this Bible study. The Bible study had a mentor, and she was a counselor. And so I was dating this guy. He was calling me out on my crap, even though I'm like, you weren't even living the right way either, homie. This was the toxic guy or? This was the boyfriend.

I lived in California. So different guy. He was the boyfriend after the toxic relationship and um that led into heartbreak like really really really bad heartbreak um a lot of like mind games there i thought i was gonna marry him yeah and then my mentor who she was a counselor she brought me into her like counselor chair essentially and i sat down and i met with her every Wednesday cause I just like knew I needed help. Like I was like, I just like need somebody to talk to because I didn't have anybody that could like really speak into me. And so I sat down in her chair one day and

she's like, what do you want to talk about? And I was like, I don't know. I just want to like, just want to like get my feelings out, I guess. And she was like, well, I know what we're going to talk about today. And I'm like, Oh, frankly. And she's like, the Holy Spirit told me something that I think I need to reveal to you. And so she like has this piece of paper and she slams it on the table. And it says on the very top in bold words, hypocrite. And I was like, she's like, the Lord wants me to tell you that you are a hypocrite and you have been living a double life. And you wear one mask for some people and you wear another mask for others. And it is time for you to decide you're going to lose your boyfriend. You're going to lose everything. If you do not decide and choose Jesus. And like that moment changed my

life. And it's funny. Cause I think a lot of people could be like, Oh, that's so judgmental of her to say, how dare she call you out like that? No, that was the biggest blessing I've ever had in my life. Like, thank you, Casey, for calling me out on my crap. And from that day forward, I got mentored Bible studies. I went into also a season of isolation, which we talked about on my podcast, lived alone for two years, soaking up the Bible, reading the word of God. I mean, just like transformed my life. I met Maddie around that breakup time actually. Um, and then I moved back to Dallas two and a half years ago, lived with her and my life has just been uphill. It doesn't mean there's not challenges, but knowing Jesus changed my life. The Bible changed my life, community, church. I mean,

my life is like, I'm so thankful. I would never ever want to go back to the girl I used to be so insecure, lonely, hating myself, hating my body, so many things that I could speak to. But literally the Bible, people, community, mentorship, church, friends, like changed my life. So. Oh, I resonate with that so much. Gosh, there's so much in there. The first thing that comes to my mind really quick that I just don't want to forget, I want to ask because you had walked through a couple of toxic relationships and something that's really normal in relationships is these mind games. And I think that there's a spirit of narcissism that people really need to be aware of because that control, that mind game, a lot of the time it comes like, um, control, like from like a sexual angle. Um,

and that will, you know, that people will prey on like young women and innocent women a lot and get them to do things sexually that they never wanted to do and then all of a sudden you're in a situation you never thought you would be in so i just i'm really curious as to do you have any because now you're engaged to your beautiful most amazing man ever and you guys are a beautiful couple and he's a man of god and and you guys are so amazing together do you have any remnant remnants of that trauma that you endured that you've had? No, let's go Jesus. Truly like through spiritual counseling, like Christian counseling and renewing my mind and letting, you know, that Bible verse that says the old is gone.

The new has come. I truly feel that way. I know that's not my identity. It's not who I am anymore. And I think the sad thing is a lot of people will try to hold you to your past a lot I remember when you did this or didn't you do this or what about this and it's like okay clearly you don't know the gospel because the gospel has set me free that's not who I am anymore like that died when I was baptized when I went under the water when I came out a new creation and so I don't that's not my identity I don't remember that I don't think about it even though people may try to remind me, it's just taking those thoughts captive and being like, nope, that's not who I am anymore. And it sounds similar to the enemy because like he always tries to bring you back, remind you, don't you remember this?

Don't you remember your past? And you're like, nope, I actually don't. Is that literally what you do when you get those thoughts? I honestly don't even get those thoughts very much. I only get them when I get comments about it. And it's like a moment it might sting and then I'm like, nope. And then I just throw it away and it just doesn't affect me anymore. And I'm thankfully with the best person that doesn't hold it over my head. Cause I've had guys hold it over my head of like, Oh, didn't you do

this with this guy? Or like, I always wanted to marry a virgin. I thought I'd marry a virgin. I'm like, sorry, what do you want me to say to that? You know? So, um, no, I don't feel like it ever weighs me down. And I'm just so confident who God has called me to be and who I am now that it doesn't like linger. All right, GGB gang, we have a really exciting announcement to make. Our, what are we doing on November 17th of the 19th? We are coming to Vancouver. We're coming to Vancouver, you guys. I'm so excited. We're so excited to be with Dr. Fassel and the whole CLM team at the Relationship by Design God's Plan for Your Love Life event. Yeah, it's going to be an incredible weekend. Yeah, I really believe that God is going to move so much in this space. It's going to be incredible speakers. We're going to be there. We

hope that you guys are able to come if you're able to travel if you're already in Vancouver you guys are going to go to covenantoflife.org slash RBD to register yeah we're really looking forward to it register as soon as you can it's November 17th through the 19th and we're just really really excited to meet you guys and connect we really hope to see you guys there love you love you I'm happy. That is just so powerful. And I loved your response because I wasn't expecting that. I thought I was expecting to be like, yeah, you know, it's hard. I have to work through all this stuff. And that is the case.

I did though. Yeah, that is the case for a lot of people. But because you know Jesus, you know the gospel, you understand that you are set free from all of that. And Maddie, you said something last night about how you can literally pray to have new memories. because the number one way, I mean, we, I mean, Ari and I both have struggled with OCD. And so from that OCD, we will have obsessive thoughts and be reminded and have these memories come up and they're like compulsive and you can't get them out. And so you can ask God, please give me new memories, help me forget it. It's gone. Well, I mean, if you say renew my mind, like he, he he does that he's in

the business of renewing minds and changing thoughts and what's that song um and beth stephanie gretzinger giving us new memories giving us new memories like spontaneous worship and at the beginning she's just saying over and over again like you're giving us new memories you're giving us new memories and i remember we were in like having our quiet time one morning and i heard that song and grae and i were engaged and I literally started praying that over the both of us. Like I had had emotional and spiritual soul ties, you know, in the past with other relationships, I had been in a four-year relationship and then he had had physical soul ties with other people. He didn't save himself for marriage and we were getting ready to become one. And I just started praying that over and over and over again,

like, so good. Give us new memories. You know, I You know, we don't want to stay bound to our past. I think about Galatians 5.1. It's like, you have been set free. It is for freedom that Christ has set you free. So now, like, stand firm. Do not return back to the bondage of your past. Like, stand firm. Do not return back to that yoke of slavery.

Don't allow your mind to be, you know, bound by the things of yesterday or the lies of today. But, like, remind yourself that it is for freedom that Christ has set you free. It's nothing you've done. It's everything he's already done for you. And you just get to receive it and walk that out. And I just would continue to remind myself of that over and over again. And even as you were talking, like I've even seen from the moment I've met you and I know you would say the same thing about me. Like we've both grown so much. And like, I do think at the beginning when I first met you, like you did really care what people thought and like what

they said about you. And I now see a woman today. I literally told her this last night. I'm like, you are the healthiest I've ever seen you. You were so confident in who you are in Christ. You are so living, truly happy and healthy in Christ. And it's so beautiful. And your relationship is, is healthy. And it's because it's rooted on Jesus and you've surrounded yourself with community and you've like allowed me and vice versa to like call you out when I'm like, you're living for the approval of people. Like you're caring too much about what they think about you. And you've done the same thing for me. And you've just had, we've had to remind each other. Yeah. So good. Yeah. So true. You find freedom in community.

You really do. Yeah, absolutely. But I love that you spoke to like prayer because I think it's so powerful. Like James 5 literally talks about the prayer of a righteous person is powerful and effective. And right before that, it starts with like, if any of you have trouble, let them pray. Like if any of you are going through this, like let them pray. Like it just says like gives four or five different examples. And it's like, man, wherever you find yourself, like pray is so powerful. powerful and there's even the james 5 16 verse which we were talking about earlier but it's like man confess your sins to one another and pray for each other so that you may be healed there is healing and confession and there is healing and having people pray over you and i've

just found that i mean that's so much a part of my testimony. Um, I'll just like jump into it really quick, but yeah, basically I was, I mean, same, like raising a Christian home, have amazing parents. Like, I mean, from a very young age encountered the Lord. I mean, I was on fire for Jesus. I was the eight year old who was going up to strangers being like, do you know our Lord and savior Jesus Christ? Like I was that crazy. No, literally I was a crazy eight year old that was like laying. I mean, I watched the Lord as I would lay hands on people in the power of the Holy Spirit. Like they would literally experience healing. And I just, the way that the Lord spoke

to me from a young age and it just was so beautiful. And then as I got older, my family actually moved to a different city and we started church hopping. And so we didn't have like a home church. And during that time, I think my faith just became way more about reputation and religion than a personal relationship. And so I lost that intimacy, that connection with the Lord that we had had such a deep relationship. And now it was all revolved around, are they going to choose me? Are they going to pick me? Am I enough in their eyes? You know, am, am, or am I going to be, you know, the one that everybody, I don't know. I just was constantly living through the lens of what other people thought about me. And that filtered into sports that filtered into school that filtered into my relationship with my family that filtered into every aspect of my life. And I mean, I was, you know, kind of similar to what Janine was

saying, like high school, like I was still kind of like the goody goody girl who was trying her best to um you know have that perfect image but I remember it was 16 years old I got into like my first relationship and this like moment takes me back but I was sitting at the school lunch table and I had an older friend come up to me and tell me in front of my entire lunch table that the guy that I was dating had cheated on me and he had lost his virginity to another girl while we were obviously had been dating. And in that moment, I remember just being so hurt, but I had to like act like I didn't care. And I was like, well, his loss. But then I ran to the bathroom and I just started bawling, crying. And in that moment, I began to question everything about myself. I questioned, am I worthy? Am I enough?. I questioned, am I worthy?

Am I enough? Am I not, you know, valuable because he chose someone else? And in that moment, that was really honestly when I started like building these walls around my heart, thinking that these walls would protect me and keep out all of the bad. But what I later realized was that it was also keeping out all of the good because I was putting up these walls also, you know, protecting myself. I wasn't able to encounter Jesus. I wasn't able to have that godly community because I was just so living in so much fear that I would be rejected or betrayed or hurt or let down. And so that just continued. I mean, even into college, um, and all the meanwhile, while

trying to have this like perfect image and this perfect reputation, I was living in secret sin. Yeah. I had been exposed to pornography at 13, 14 years old and had never experienced anything like that. I was at a friend's house and did not know what to do. I was like, do I look away? Do I tell her to turn it off? Do I do I watch? And I just remember leaving there and it was like, this innocence had been stolen. And now there was this like mysterious itch that I wanted to keep itching. And I wanted to know more and more, and I wanted to see more and more. And that continued for years. And I lived in so much shame because I was like, there's no other girl that is dealing with this. Like I'm the only girl. This is a guy problem. This is a guy's struggle struggle and I lived in so much shame and why I'm so passionate about I shared that James 5 16 verse was for me I was a Christian but I was a bound

Christian like I was a Christian but I wasn't living in freedom I was living in so much shame I was living in so much secret sin and just regret and I joined a church's small group I had like no friends all of my friends, I ended up getting dropped by like a lot of sororities. And that was also another big moment of like rejection for me. Cause in Alabama sororities are like huge. And I remember again, just feeling super lonely, super rejected, but it was, we talked about this earlier, but just like the power of sometimes isolation when it's alone with God, like can be so good. And that was a time where my faith was truly forged. And I was like, Maddie, what do you believe? What kind of life do you want

to live out? You're in college. You're going to be faced with so many pressures, so many temptations. You're going to find yourself in a room alone with a guy that you really like. What are you going to do? Like you're going to find yourself at a party or at an event where everybody around you is compromising their values and convictions. What are you going to do? And I just started asking myself these really tough questions. And in that moment, I was like, Lord, I want to go all in with you. And I want you to redefine my identity. I want you to break this spirit of performance and proving myself to everyone off of my life. And I just want you to show me who I am and the purpose that you have for my life. And then from that moment, I joined

my church's small group. And that is where I really started experiencing freedom and healing. And I confess things that I had kept in the dark that I had never told that I had literally believed a lie that if I were to tell someone this, they would never see me the same. And they would judge me. And I would, I have to live in this darkness for the rest of my life. I could never tell anyone. And I remember I confessed it to someone and she literally looked judge me and I would, I have to live in this darkness for the rest of my life. I could never tell anyone. And I remember I confessed it to someone and she literally looked at me and she was like, me too. Like that's, that's my story too.

And in that moment, literally I was like, I felt chains break off. Like I immediately, as I brought it into the light, it was like, I literally experienced this breath of fresh air, this freedom, this hope. And, um, she just began to pray for me. And then we began to just hold each other accountable. And that just really changed the trajectory of my life. Like finding godly community and confessing and just like walking in the light and living a life. Um, that was just like, here, here I am. Here's, here's my struggles of my past. Here are the lies I'm currently believing, like hold me accountable, point me to the truth. And so that really changed my life. I ended up joining my church's Bible college. And so in 2018, I graduated Auburn university with a degree in

communications as well as Bible college with a certificate of ministry. And I knew I wanted to do ministry. I knew I wanted to, to use the same power that had set me free to go and tell other people about that power and tell other people about that hope and bring that light and truth to others. And I just didn't know what that looked like and what that was going to be for me. And I had been in a four year relationship. And after I graduated, I knew we were at like a crossroads moment of like, we're either about to get engaged or we're going to break up. And in praying about it I felt like the Lord literally brought I can't I think it's Matthew 7 I can't remember it's somewhere in Matthew but it talks about where your treasure is there your heart is also and I felt like he

literally was like Maddie your treasure is this boyfriend in this relationship it's become an idol to you and I need you to lay it down and I was like no I literally was like I will give you anything else I'm not giving you this relationship and I ran for six no, I literally was like, I will give you anything else. I'm not giving you this relationship. And I ran for six months and I just constantly felt this uneasiness, this weight, this anxiety. And I was like, okay, all right, Lord, I'm going to lay this relationship down, fully believing that I was going to pick it back up again, that the Lord was going to be like, okay, you were obedient. So here it is again. And that was not what happened. Um, like a couple months after we broke up, which was the hardest decision at that time that I had ever made,

he started dating one of my best friends. And that was... What's her number? She said, what's her number? Oh, God. No, and it truly, like at that time, again, just another sting of rejection, that other feeling of just like, again, I'm not good enough.

Like he chose someone else. And God, I've got the short end of the stick. And I just remember being so upset at that time. I was in like 10 weddings. I was going through an intense breakup at my lowest of low, having to celebrate everybody else in their highest of high. And I was just praying to the Lord. I was like, this feels so unfair. And he just spoke to me. He's like, Maddie, I'm preparing you for something and I need you to trust me. And during that season, I am so grateful. I started writing my first book during that season. I started memorizing scripture. I was so dependent on the Lord. If it had not been for that season, I truly don't know who I would be today. Like my character, faith, strength, all of it forged, like fortified, like to a point where it does not matter what pressures

or temptations were coming my way. I knew who I was in Christ. I knew what I believed. This was 23, 22, 23. Okay. And so, um, then anyways, fast forward, I ended up getting a call to go on the bachelor and that came out of left field. I thought I was going to do ministry. I was like, why are they calling me? This is a prank call was not even interested. Honestly, the first time I was like, no, I'm not interested. But they were like, think about it. Called my mom. And I was like, mom, you'll never believe who just called me like LOL would never do this. And she was just like, well, Maddie, the first thing that we do is we pray. And so we're going to take this before God and we're going to ask him his thoughts. And I was not expecting that response from my mom, but I was like, okay, like I let's pray about it. And so

we took months, like it was months of praying and fasting and through just signs and wonders and the Bible and through people like the Holy spirit just spoke like, this is where I'm leading you. And you just have to trust me. And I had no idea what was going to come. I had not ever really watched the bachelor before. I did not know much about the show and so I just stepped into it saying all right lord I trust you um it was a wild experience all right Gigi Bigang you know that me and Ari are obsessed with all things makeup hair nails and thank god for Olive and June wait let me see that color what is this so I got Gel-X and then I painted over it with Olive and June. Wait, let me see that color. What is this? So I got Gel-X and then I painted over it with Olive and June polish and I am obsessed. I always used

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having to go to the salon. I've been getting more compliments with Olive and June polish than I do when I go to the salon. So you guys are going to go visit oliveandjune.com slash ggb for 20% off your first Olive and June system. That's O-L-I-V-E-A-N-D-J-U-N-E dot com slash ggb for 20% off your first Olive and June system. Thank you, Olive and June, for sponsoring this video. It was a very wild experience. And, you know, just the Lord gave me so many opportunities and so many moments where I got to encourage the producers and other girls on the show and, you know, even take a stand for my faith and for my purity and share that I had made a decision

that moment in college when I asked myself, Maddie, what are you going to do when pressures and temptations come? I made a decision in that moment. I'm going to save myself for marriage. And I got to share that on national television. And that was terrifying. And there was a lot of, you know, praise and there was a lot of hate from that. But what's been really, really cool is just the amount of of people that have been like, man, you gave me But what's been really, really cool is just the amount of, of people that have been like, man, you gave me the courage to also take a stand for values and, um, for my faith and to walk that out, you know, unashamed. And I'm really grateful for that, but it was definitely a really hard experience. Like I walked away from the show, um, grateful for the opportunity to

just continue to talk about Jesus and whatever way I could, but also with a lot of trauma and, um, with having to deal with now this new world and this new life that I didn't really ask for or know that would come. Um, and now just trying to figure out how to not let other people tell me who I am, but to continue to remind myself of the truth of who I am, which is in God's word and what he says about me. And so, yeah, that was like really, that was really, really hard. I was like, honestly lost 20 something pounds and was in my house anxious every day. Um, just really, really struggling with the amount of just opposition for like taking a stand for my faith and all that came with that. Um, and then in the midst of kind of healing and figuring

all of that out, honestly, I met Janine, which was such like a God, a God thing and truly such an answer prayer because I was like, I need, I need a girl who like understands my situation. Like I, like the, the platform that God has given me and the pressures that I face, but someone who's firm in their faith and also someone who we can have fun together. We can laugh together. We can talk about things together. And the first time that we met, I was literally like, Oh no, we're going to be roommates. Like we're going to be best friends. We literally knew. And I'm so, so grateful for that. And we ended up, she said it earlier, but we ended up living together. And, um, I knew we were supposed to live in Texas. She was trying

to convince me to move to LA. And I was like like the Holy Spirit is telling me no and no literally the Holy Spirit was like Dallas Texas and I didn't know anyone in Dallas and so I was like Janine we're just living in Dallas and which is my home so I was like why you want to move back to Dallas and I was trying to go back I saw that as moving backwards and God was like no this is the best decision you're ever going to make and it was we knew we were going to meet our husbands here and I'm so so grateful that we leaned into that and yeah yeah about a year into living in dallas i met grant through like blind date which is my now husband yeah can we okay let's talk about it first of all i just want to say so your experience on the bachelor you literally got up and basically professed your

faith professed declared the gospel on a public national secular platform. You didn't go up on like the better together network and started preaching the gospel. You went on the bash. Yeah. Yeah. ABC, but not the family portion. Literally you, what you had to do. And we talked about it last night. How, because we talked a lot about comments and criticism and some being, some being righteous and some being, you know, deserved and some criticism just being completely out of left field and not right. You had, we talk about how we really only receive criticism from other Christians, like the, you know, secular, the worldly people, they don't really care about what we're doing. For you, you had both sides of it. You had criticism from Christians and you had criticism from the world. I can't even imagine

what that was like to navigate for you, but you are so strong, obviously, and you're so bold and God knew what he was doing when he chose you. And I think you were the perfect person to carry out his will and his plan and kudos to you. Good job. Congratulations. Because it was really, really amazing what you got through. Yeah. What an amazing testimony. And also I love what you said about when you finally confessed in prayer. I had trouble with that too, where I was going to God in my prayer life, but I wasn't being real with him. And I love how you said like, once I confessed it I was free and I think that's something that everybody needs to know when you go to God in prayer you go to him real and raw and just confess

everything yeah and that's when he meets you yeah yeah absolutely yeah I mean and we were talking about this earlier but just like following the Lord like following God is not easy it's like it's not easy it's counter-cultural it's not easy. It's counter-cultural. It's not popular. You get mocked, you get insulted, you get attacked. Um, but it's worth it. It's so worth it. And it's in like my Bible promises me and tells me I will be persecuted. Like Jesus says, if they hated me, they will hate you. And if he literally goes on in first John four, it talks about, you cannot love God and the world. Like, and if you were of the world, the world will accept you as their own. If you were of God, the world will not accept you as their own because you are not of the world.

And so it's that reminder that as Christians, we are called to be set apart. We are called to rise up. We are called to speak out and to stand firm in our faith and to be unwavering in that and to not care. And, and for me, like, I think something that I try to say often is like the only way I was able to stand firm publicly was because I was standing firm privately. I was doing that private in my private life years before that. And I was abiding in the word. I was in prayer every day. I was surrounding myself with godly community. I was living a life of, of purpose and just like, God, how can you use me? Who can you, how can you use me to encourage someone today? Like that was truly my mindset and eternal mindset of this isn't my home. Heaven is my home. And when he called me to go on that show, I knew it was for

something so much bigger and greater than me. Like it wasn't about me. And I knew anything he chose to give me was going to be for his glory and for his purposes. And so me choosing to take a stand, I knew would not be popular in any way. I honestly didn't know what the outcome would be. I was like, I just got to stand firm in who I am. But I now look back and I'm like, man, it's because I'm living for a different kingdom. I'm not living for the approval of people, you know, Galatians 1.10. I'm not living to please people. I'm living to please God for an audience of one. And because of that, it says in Matthew 5, blessed are those who are persecuted and insulted for my name, for great is your reward in heaven. I know that I'm living for a crown that will not spoil or fade, for riches that will not run out. I am living for something so much greater than what this world can give me. And I think we so fear like standing up like for our faith or,

you know, whatever it may be for whoever's listening and whatever their circumstances are, because we fear other people's opinions or, you know, are they going to mock us or make fun of us or judge us or leave us? And it's like, man, but great is our reward in heaven. And it is so, it is so much greater. Like I can lay my head down at night and be proud of who I am when I, when I choose to live that life versus when I change conform and compromise who I am to be liked or accepted by someone else, which I've had those moments of doing. And, um, then I lay down and I'm like, man, I I'm feeling regret and shame, you know? And it's just, it's like when you live and you follow God's commands, like there is such a peace and just life that you get.

I just love it because you, we all, everybody needs to be so careful in who they criticize and how they, when they criticize how God is doing something, because you have no idea how God is going to move and in what spaces he's going to move. I'm sure you had a lot of people in your personal life telling you going on The Bachelor is the worst possible decision. It's certainly not good for the kingdom of God. And look at what he did with your story. We as well, like we have had so many, you just can't doubt what God is going to do and how he's going to do it. And he has really special ways, just like he took Paul, somebody that I'm sure nobody ever thought he would become such a devout Christian. He was killing Christians, persecuting them, literally in direct opposition to Jesus and his teachings. And he became one of the greatest of the Bible.

And so like we just be careful who you condemn and who you criticize because you have no idea what God is doing in their life. That's so true. Because I feel like, especially as Christians, we want to be like, you're not doing enough. You're not holy enough. But I feel like if you just let God do what he does best, he's in the business of exposing and humbling people, but also uplifting the right people. And so it's not our, you know, business to go online and be like, oh my gosh, they're not doing enough. And how dare you do this? Like, obviously with your friends, you call them out and you say, hey, I think there's a better way. I think this is not who

you are and what you should be doing. But I feel like God will, he says he will bring out what's done in the darkness into the light. And he does that. And so we will see people that may have platforms or that are on stages or whatever that aren't living in holiness. God will expose them whether they like it or not. And it's a call for us to live more holy because if we're not living in righteousness, we will be exposed. If we're being deceitful or relying or we're only doing this social media stuff just to get ourselves famous, like God's going to expose us. It's a reminder of going back to the private times of the Lord. God, clean hands, pure heart. Please check me. Are my intentions, is my heart,

is my motives, are they all pure? I want to stand pure and holy before you. And that is all that matters. Yeah. And that is so important. Like I think that we live, there's just been purity culture and there's been so many different, like it's purity has been so looked down on and just made fun of and like how silly and how stupid and how weird and how, you know, and man, I just have seen in my own personal life that pursuing purity and pursuing holiness has given far more than anything that it's, I think there's this idea of like, it's holding me back. It's keeping me from experiencing fun and freedom and life and all of these things. It's like, no, the opposite, like pursuing purity has given me back. It's keeping me from experiencing fun and freedom and life and all of these things. Yeah, exploring. No, the opposite.

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slash ggb and use code ggb to claim your free three-piece towel set and save 40% off. Again, that's trymiracle.com slash ggb. Thank you, Miracle Made, for sponsoring this video. I just think you guys set such a great example of that because it's the truth. That's what God calls us to do as women. that's what God calls us to do as women. Well, it's what we talked about in your episode is how the way to not compromise in your beliefs and your convictions is to know why you're doing what you're doing.

And if you don't understand why God saved sex for marriage, we talked about this before, but sex is the most sacred act you could possibly do. It's so intimate as well. You can't get closer. You can't get more intimate with a person. And it's so beautiful. And God created it for the context of marriage to be this incredible thing. And then when you do it outside, there's soul ties that are formed. There's trauma that happens. You don't hook up culture. We are so anti-hookup culture

because it is so dangerous. It's so bad for you. And I know we come from different worlds, right? You guys are from the South. We are from like the East Coast. We live in LA. I don't know exactly how it is around you. I'm sure you deal with similar things, but like in our culture where we come from, I mean, hookup culture is the name of the game.

Feminism, my body, my choice, do whatever you want. And it is so, i just want to say that whatever society and the media is pushing on you you have to test over and over and over again because it's probably whatever's being pushed is probably what's bad for you because that's how it goes and this just like give your body to whoever it's not sex isn't a big deal it's disgusting it's wrong it is and like it's it's and yes you get made fun of for having beliefs like this and trust me like I'm sure a lot of people who watch us would be like what are you guys talking about yeah and I think also like in my story you know have gone from not waiting for marriage when that was my desire as a

child and as a high school student not waiting to to now waiting, I can totally see, oh my gosh, God, like your way is better. And I can speak to both sides of, you know, wanting to wait, not waiting, now waiting again. I see the benefit. I see why God orchestrated it that way. Because, you know, sex keeps you longer in relationships. It blinds you. It bounds you to somebody. It manipulates you. You're no longer forming deeper intimacy and relationships outside of that. You use that as a, as a way to kind of cope or like, okay, we're fighting. Let's just do this or whatever. It's not, that's not the way God intended it to be. And obviously like Maddie's marriage, she can speak to, you know, what it's like in marriage, but it's just, it's supposed to be safe and sacred

and special. And you're, you know, like this person's not going to leave me. We can be naked and unashamed. Like I remember always being so ashamed and like, I wouldn't tell people. And I'm like, this is not what God intended for me. There's no, God did not intend for me to have to hide this from people. Like it's supposed to be like, yeah, I'm having sex. I'm proud of it with my husband, you know, it should be that way because he created it, you know, and the enemy always takes everything that God gives us and twists it and says, perverts it, gives a half truth, like says, always flips it somehow upside down. And I'm just like, if people test what you said, I love that you said that bring everything back to the Bible, back to the word of God,

test it. God, what do you say about it? I can guarantee you it's going to be completely opposite of what culture says. Everything that culture says is liberation is chains. Everything that they say is freedom is being bound. It's the opposite every single time. I believe this stuff. I did. I have. And like, it's not until God really brought it to the light and showed me, no, this is wrong. No. When you are being provocative, when you are expressing yourself in this way, you need to look within yourself and see what am I lacking right now? What part of me needs to be validated? There's something in me. Why?

Instead of because I know that I want to be validated for my mind and for my heart and for the things about me. Totally. That the people who know me love about me. Like even the person that I'm with, like that, how I look in my body and all these things are so far down on the list than all the things that he loves about me. And so I'm looking for validation

in the most surface level, superficial way when there is such a better way to do things that's actually fulfilling, that will actually be affirming in my spirit and my soul that's so true like we should be as like just speaking to women we should be looking to gain respect not to turn heads like we should be looking to be someone pursuing our hearts and not pursuing us for our bodies and i think that culture has so painted this picture by the way that we dress by the way that we talk by the way that we dress, by the way that we talk, by the way that we present ourselves,

by what we give, that that is how we will find love and validation and how we will, you know, have, have, you know, guys pursue us. And I just,

man, I so see in scripture again and again and again, just even Proverbs 31 and like the call as a woman of Christ and what God calls us to. And even in Matthew 5, 8, blessed are the pure in heart for they will see God. What does purity bring us closer to God? Like if nothing else, it's like, why we shouldn't be dancing with the line of impurity. We should be getting as close to holiness as possible. And I think we ask ourselves often, like how far is too far? What can I do without sinning? Or what can I, how can I get as close to the line as possible? And it's like, but why would we be asking that

question? If we know holiness puts us before God, purity puts us before God. And that that is his call and command for us as believers. You know, Ephesians one, four, for he chose us in him before the creation of the world to be holy and blameless in his sight. That's our identity as a believer. That's our identity as a Christian. It's more than just what we do or don't do. It's who we are. Like we're holy, we're pure. And when we choose to say, God, I'm going to follow you except this one part, we are totally missing out on who God is and what he offers us. We're missing out on the life of peace and protection that God gives us. When I was choosing to live a life of secret sin and allowing sexual sin to stay in the dark and be a part of my life. Like

I, like you said, I was so, I was bound. I was in bondage. I was, I wasn't confident. I wasn't, I was full of shame. I was full of regret. I didn't feel worthy. I didn't feel good. I felt dirty. I felt not, you know, and it was like, as soon as I began to bring that into the light and pursue purity, it's like, I felt this confidence again. I felt this hope again. I felt this joy, this peace, this innocence, like a little kid, freedom. Yeah. Like a little kid just running around, not like not bound, but just free.

But I think also within purity culture, what you said, like, if you don't know the why, it's not going to make sense. It's that whole saying, like, if you don't know your why, you'll lose your way. And you've got to understand the why, because it's like when a parent is like, okay, don't do that. And you're like, why? And you're like, because I told you so. And that you need a parent to explain to you, no, it's for your good. It's for your protection. I don't want a man taking advantage of you. You're so much more than your body, like explaining more. Why does God see it that way? Otherwise you're just going to see it as a don't do this rules, regulations, laws, and no one wants to abide to that. Like nobody wants to follow that. If you understand the why and the relationship and how God's

protecting you and he wants more for you, there's so much more in a marriage that's sacred than just don't do this and do this. Like, otherwise that's why I rebelled all the time because rules without relationship is a rebellion. And I remember like hearing that as a kid. And I felt that with my dad, a lot of the times, like he just said, no, no, no, no, no, don't do this. And that's why I rebelled so much. But when I understood why God has that way, I gained a relationship with him. I'm like, God, I'm sorry. I wish I followed you. I wish I obeyed because it would have prevented me from a lot of pain, a lot of regret, a lot of shame, a lot of mistakes. I know I'm not a new creation.

I don't hold myself to that anymore. Thank you, Jesus. But, you know, when you're living through that shame, you're just like, why did I do that, you know? I will say, I just, I want to speak to the audience really quickly because the truth is we do have a lot of people who are maybe new believers who are fresh in the faith, baby Christians. And I just want to say, I know this conversation can be really hard to hear. I want you to understand that you do not need to feel condemned.

You don't need to feel judged. I don't want you to feel overwhelmed by this conversation. I want you to feel inspired. I sometimes even can be overwhelmed by conversations like this because it is a high standard that we're held to, but you're capable, you're called to it. And it says in scripture that you will not be tempted beyond what you can bear. And God will provide a way of escape for you. He will always provide a way of escape. So stay close to Jesus, talk to him, bring all of this, anything you might be feeling. I just don't want you to leave this conversation feeling condemned. Yes. No, because it's hard. We're talking about it like it's easy

and it's not easy. And we lived through it. And so that's why you shouldn't feel ashamed. And, and I just, what you said, I love that you said that I have felt such shame, especially when I started this platform and you know, God has his arms wide open. He forgives. It's just about living right from here on out. Yeah. Yeah. From this day forward. Exactly. That's my favorite, you know, ideas like from this day forward, your past is your past for a reason. And the beautiful thing about choosing to receive the grace and the love that Jesus so freely gives us is he says, Hey, you are a new creation. Like I have made you brand new. The old is gone. The new is here. That is no longer your story. That is no longer who you

are and you get to walk in freedom. And I think that is what is so beautiful about choosing to go all in with Jesus and accepting the freedom that he offers us. It's like, we're no longer bound by that center, bound by our past. And that doesn't mean that you're not going to still struggle. And that's the craziest thing is're not going to still struggle. Absolutely. And that's the craziest thing is like you alluded to this earlier, but like even within marriage, you have to choose purity. I'm so happy that the world has you guys. You're such a beautiful example of obedience and what it's like, what it's like, what happens when you do have boundaries in life

and boundaries in the home and you have, you know, you're taught these morals and you're taught this biblical truth. And I think it's important why you guys are doing what you're doing, because for people that didn't grow up in a Christian home, like having other people to look up to, you know, to what the Bible does say and to, you know, biblical, and even if it's just like learn from our story, you know, and I'm so thankful that you said that because even you mentioned, um, Paul earlier, well, for those who maybe you said that because even you mentioned, um, Paul earlier, well, for those who maybe don't know the history of Paul, like you alluded to this earlier, but his name used to be Saul and he was killing Christians and he was literally going after God's

people. And literally he had an encounter with Jesus and what did Jesus do? He changed his name. He changed his identity. He made him new. And that is what God does for every single one of us. All of our stories are different. None of our stories are the same. Every single one of us could, you know, put something right here on this table of a reason of why we should carry shame and a reason of why we should carry regret and a reason of why we should be bound. But God says, that's no longer who you are. Like I've, I've given you a new name. I've given you a new identity. I have made you whole and brand new, and that's no longer who you are. Like I've, I've given you a new name. I've given you a new identity. I've made you whole and brand new, and that's no longer who you are. And I shared with you even last night,

the woman at the well, it's in John chapter four, like in John chapter four, Jesus met this woman at the well, and he began to tell her everything she had ever done. He called her out of her sin, not to humiliate her, but to help her and to set her free. And it was so cool because she left there and she began to go and tell every single person, she became such an evangelist. She began to go and tell every single person, Hey, this man just told me everything I've ever done. And she began to boast in the very things that kept her bound and the very things that held her back. She began to boast in because she said, Hey, it's not me, but it's Christ who set me free. And now I'm going to tell you guys everything. And it goes on to say that the people, you know, went to go before Jesus and they said, Hey, we no longer believe in Jesus, but because of your

words, but we now believe in him because we we've seen it for ourselves. And that's what it does. When you share your testimony, when you share your story, it puts people before Jesus, but then it gives them the opportunity to hear from him themselves. And so there's power in your testimony. And it's the one thing people can't deny. Like they can try to say, okay, what happened to the dinosaurs? Did Jonah really be in the belly of the whale? But like people can't, whatever, they can't deny your testimony because it's like, it's a personal thing. And I would never want to go to someone and say to them like, oh, that didn't really happen. It's like, no, it did. And what we said that Bible verse the other day, I think it's

Revelation 12, 10, for we overcome by the blood of the lamb and the word of our testimony. Those two things, we first find freedom by the blood of the lamb. That's how we find freedom. And then once we find that freedom, we go and tell through our testimonies. And I mean, testimonies are powerful. That's how people find freedom. And I'm sure in all of our stories, somebody listening can be like, okay, I relate to that. I relate to that. I relate to that. And just about what you were feeling, like God doesn't remember our sins anymore. So like, why do you? And it's like the enemy will always remind you of your sins, remind you of your past. But it says in Psalm 103, 12, as far as the East is from the West, so far has he removed our transgressions from us. He does not remember our sins anymore, but we do.

The enemy tries to constantly remind us, remember what you did. And God's like, I don't even remember. I see you as new. I see you as beloved. I see you as cherished as my daughter. And he just holds you like in his hands and he's like, it's okay. Like, I love you. It's okay. Because he took on our sin and made us righteous. And so when he looks at you, he sees righteousness. Like he doesn't see your, your sin any longer. And I heard that quote one time. That's like, when the enemy reminds you of your past, remind him of his future. And I think that's so powerful. It's like, man, what the enemy meant to destroy you, Genesis 50, 20, like God will redeem and use for good. And that is no longer who you are anymore, but it what the enemy meant to destroy you, Genesis 50, 20, like God will redeem and use for good.

And that is no longer who you are anymore. But it gives you an opportunity to boast in that and be like, look what God redeemed me from. Yeah, it's so important to know that because I was like, I didn't feel worthy to come to Christianity. So it's so important to know that. And I also was talking to you earlier. You said something and you were like, while it's God forgives, you don't ever want to take advantage of sin. So let's talk about that because I loved when you said that earlier. Yeah. I think that there's these two categories, this like lawfulness and this lawlessness. And one says, Hey, if you follow religion and the law,

like that'll get you into heaven. And then one says, lawlessness says I can do whatever the heck I want to do because Jesus still loves me. And both are wrong. It's, it's truth and grace combined, you know, it's, it's love and truth combined and you can't have one without the other. And so I think it's, it's so important to realize like Jesus died for our sins and not because of our good works. Like he, it wasn't by what we have and what we offer, but he did save us to do good works and it's faith plus action. Um, it's not just faith alone. And so I think it is so important that once you are saved, there is a standard. You spoke to this earlier. There is a standard that we're called to live. And it talks about in first

John, like you cannot, those who follow God, you cannot continue to be enslaved to sin. You cannot continue to follow sin. That doesn't mean you will ever sin. Um, I think there is a difference to living in sin and falling into sin. And so there's a moment where we may stumble and fall and that's where we confess, we repent, we ask someone to pray over us. But then I think there's moments where we're choosing to willfully live in sin and knowing like, Hey, okay, I'm a Christian, but I'm just going to continue to, you know, do whatever I want because you know, there's God's grace. And I would truly say like, I don't know if you're even a Christian because the Bible is very, very, very clear. You cannot love God and the world. You cannot live in sin and be

a child of God. And so I don't see that from a condemning place. I say that from hopefully a loving place because the truth is loving. And I pray that we realize, you know, once we choose to go on with the Lord, that's salvation, but then it's a day by day sanctification. He begins to sanctify us. He begins to purify our hearts. He begins to, the more you spoke to this earlier, the more and more closer we get to holiness. It's like,

we can't even tolerate certain music. We can't even tolerate being around certain people. We can't tolerate the same sin that used to be seen as not a big deal. He'll, he'll begin to like convict you more and more, the closer and closer you get to him. And the more and more time you spend in his word.

Like you've, you were open about that even last night with pictures and stuff, you know? And it's like those things, I mean, same for, I mean, it's like,

same for us. Like some of the ways we used to like dress and the way we talked and the music we listened to, it's like, we didn't see it as a big deal, but the closer and closer we got to the Lord and the closer and closer we, you know, we were just in his word and we were surrounding ourselves with godly people. He just began calling us out and calling us higher again, not to humiliate us, but to help us and to give

us life and peace because the spirit gives birth to life and peace and the flesh gives birth to death. And so it's realizing when I follow the cravings of my flesh and I give into that, it's only going to lead me down a path of destruction. Absolutely. I was thinking, um, because back to knowing the why I truly believe that the root of sin is unbelief. I think that if there is falling into sin and then there's habitual sin. And I think if you're living in habitual sin, it's not just the sin that you're doing. It's actually the sin of unbelief because you clearly don't believe what God says about this. That's so good. And so you need to ask yourself why, what does he say, and what is the reason? And let me know the truth.

Not just know the truth, but know the truth. And I know for me, there's been a lot of things in my life because I know the truth. I have an incredible memory, and so I can read scripture. I can memorize scripture, and I can know it. But if it's just up here, I'm not going to actually live by it. And so I need to understand him. And that's where the relationship comes in because the religion will keep you up here, but relationship brings you down here. I had a thought because I mean, kind of what you were saying, like there's that Bible verse, I think it's John 14. It says, if you love me, obey my commandments. And it's not obey my

commandments. It's not just like period obey my commandments. It's like, Hey, if you love me, obey my commandments. And it's not obey my commandments. It's not just like period, obey my commandments. It's like, Hey, if you love me, like what do you do for the people you love relationship? You, you do things because you care for them and you want to make them happy. But it's also like, it's out of the love you want to obey. It's not just obey. And then you get my love. It's like, God, out of this adoration, I had this whole revelation of what does it mean to have adoration for God versus obligation. And a lot of religion will say, no, you're obliged. Follow God. Do these rules. Do this.

Go to church. And then you'll get into heaven. And God's like, no, if you just adore me, you sit at my feet like Mary did. Was it Mary? Not Martha. Martha was sweeping. She was a sweeper girl. I'm like, we've all been there, Martha.

Don't worry. I've definitely been a Martha. she was a sweeper girl i'm like we've all been there martha don't worry i've definitely been a martha and she and he and god jesus says to her mary has chosen what is better to sit at my feet and gaze upon my face and that is where you see okay god i see your ways are better i love you it's out of this adoration this reverence this fear for you that i i want to obey it's not just by obeying like solely just out of obeying, you're going to fail every single time. Because it's out of your flesh.

The only way we can fully follow him and obey is if we are abiding in him. If we adore him, we fear him, and we know him. Like that is how we can obey his commandments, through his Holy Spirit. I love that you spoke to like, if you love me, you will obey me. I actually read that this morning.

Literally in John 14. Okay, I was right. And I love that you spoke to like, if you love me, you will obey me. I actually read that this morning, literally in John 14. Okay, I was right. And I love that you spoke to that because I remember having this moment where for so long I viewed my relationship with God is so different than my relationship with other people. It was like, I can never do enough to please God. God, I don't know how to follow you. I don't know how to like do all these things.

And once I realized like, it's honestly not that different. Like, how do I have a strong relationship with Janine? I spend time with Jan with Janine I listen to Janine I get to know what makes Janine feel loved you know it's like yeah there's that relational aspect of it and it was like the Lord gave me this this picture of walking down the aisle to my spouse and this was before I met Grant and got married but it was like I had this visual of walking towards God. And it's like, I think when we think about getting married, we're not going to be walking down the aisle. I mean, you're getting married soon, right? You're not going to be walking down the aisle, going towards the love of your life thinking, well, now there's all these things I can't do anymore. Shoot. Darn

it. Can't get with this guy. Can't like, you're going to be so excited to become one with this person that you have waited for and prayed for. And I think in the same way, it's like, man, when we view it from a place of love, it's not, man, now there's all these things that I can't do. There's all these rules that I have to follow. There's all this reputed religion. It's like, no, we're like, there's all these things that I get to do because of the love that I have for him. And I think it's the same way in our relationship with God. It's like, Lord, I'm not doing all of these things because I have to. And because whatever X, Y, and Z, I am doing these things because of my love for you. And I realized that loving you is obedience. Like loving you is obedience. And the outcome is in your hands. Like obedience is my call. And that is my responsibility. And just trusting that

there will blessing will follow obedience, whatever that blessing looks like. What is it that JP always says? Obedience is not determined by the outcome. I don't know. He always says like, like you don't look at just the outcome. Like you just be obedient just to be obedient. And you don't know how God is going to bless that. And like, I think a lot of people want this instant gratification because we're so wired that way. Like, okay, where's my reward? And it's like, we don't know what the reward's going to be. Like, just be obedient for the we don't know what the reward's going to be. Like, just be obedient for the sake of that and watch what God's going to do.

And the blessings may come in a different shape or form than you've anticipated. Yeah, yeah. Man, you guys are going to free so many people with this episode. This is beautiful. We get so many, every topic, talk about purity. And you guys are the perfect girls to come on here and preach about it. So we thank you.

Really quickly, so you're in your engagement season. Touch on what that is like for you right now. I mean, it's really fun and also hard at the same time. You can never really prepare yourself for it until you're actually in it. And I think what's kind of sad is the amount of people that were like, engagement is the worst season ever. And it's really hard but why is it hard because you're making so many life-altering decisions in one season you're talking about joining bank accounts and moving in together and like sexpectations and

there's so many things you're learning i know it's a term becoming one with two two totally one yet yeah it's like this weird in between it's like a holding space of like okay we're not dating we're not married yet We're not married yet. We're not one yet, but we're getting there. And then temptations start to arise and like all this spiritual warfare because the enemy hates marriage. He hates it. It's a godly marriage. And so he tries to do anything to tear you apart or cause more temptations and all these things.

And so we just have to pray more, armor up, confess more, have people be around us more. But it is the most fun season. I've loved it. It has bonded us so much. But it is the most fun season. I've loved it. It has bonded us so much, but I'm also just so excited to marry him. So I can't wait. Congratulations. You deserve it. You are such an angel. Maddie, how is, you're about to hit a year with your husband, Grant, and you have this incredible story of like publicly proclaiming your purity to the world. You really, you, you ran the race and completed the task given to you by the Lord Jesus. I mean, you, you did it. That is so cool. And it's unheard

of these days. And especially from where we come from, like it's, you should be so proud of yourself. I just want to ask, you touched last night about how you have so many expectations going into marriage, even around sex and around what that should look like. And like, I know there's a lot of people, there's so much pressure on sex going into marriage. Can you speak on that at all? Man, I, so I chose the words worth the wait to go on my wedding veil and that caused so much traction from a lot of people. And I want to speak to that for a second, just because I, when choosing those words, those were the words that just continued to ring in my mind over and over again when I was thinking about like spending the rest of my life with this person and I remember waking up on my wedding day it was before I saw any of my bridesmaids I like slept in a room alone I had my door locked I opened up my Bible I'm

spending time with the Lord I'm worshiping and I had this moment of just being so overwhelmed with emotion and just literally hitting my knees and thanking God and saying, thank you. Thank you for not letting me settle. Like, thank you for not letting, thank you for not answering all the prayers that I was begging you to answer. Thank you for the closed doors. Thank you for the not right nows. And thank you for this moment.

Thank you. Because he was so worth the wait and it just continued to like penetrate through my heart. And even as I was walking down the aisle to him, it was just this beautiful, it felt like even just this moment of like our relationship with Jesus as we are the bride of Christ and he is our groom and just becoming one with God and becoming one now with my husband. And my biggest thing was I made a decision when I was in college. I was like, I'm going to save myself for marriage because I was like, body, soul, and spirit, Lord, I'm yours. And one day I'm going to look in the face of my spouse. And I said this in our vows, I looked at Grant and I said, now body, soul, and spirit, I'm yours. You have all of me. You've literally all of me. And I am so, so grateful.

And that has not been Grant's story. Grant did not save himself for marriage. And those are, you know, conversations we've had to have and, you know, things that we had to talk through beforehand. But what is so beautiful of what we were saying earlier is that he's a new creation. And I literally prayed again and again, Lord, give us new memories. And we have come into marriage. It has not been perfect. We have, of course, like working through, I had no idea what I was doing, y'all. Like I had no idea what I was doing, but what is so, so beautiful is that when God is at the center of it, there is, there is no shame. There is freedom. I know he's not going anywhere. I'm not going anywhere. Like we're in this thing. We're in this thing to figure it out.

And what is so beautiful is that sex within the right parameters and within the right context is worship. It's literally worship to God. And it is, it is literally uniting us in every body soul and spirit we are becoming one when we are having sex like it's it's a crazy concept because the world it's become so perverted but within the context of marriage it truly is so beautiful again it's not perfect were there moments where we had to figure things out absolutely were there moments where we had to have hard conversations absolutely and that is why I'm so grateful that our relationship is not all built on this one act. Jesus Christ is the foundation of our relationship and every aspect of it, communication, physical intimacy, like laughter, joy, every fruit of it is all rooted in the source of Jesus Christ. And so

it's not, it's not the foundation of our relationship. It does not make or break us. And we are in this for the long haul. And so it's like we're just going to keep getting better and better and better and growing every single day in all aspects of our marriage, including our intimacy. And so it's so beautiful within the context of marriage because there is that freedom and that shameless audacity to just

know that it's, it's the giver, it's the gift of God. And it just, it's worship to him. And it glorifies God. He created it. He loves it. He made it to be safe and like beautiful and enjoyed and enjoyed. And yeah. And again, like in the world, like it is enjoyable, like duh, we know that. But again, it's like, it scars you somehow or it leaves you hurt. And again, like in the world, like it is enjoyable. Like, duh, we know that. But again, it's like it scars you somehow or it leaves you hurt. And it's so beautiful to be like, oh, wait, you're not going to leave. Like, like it's I can communicate these things to you. And then you're not going to like just run away. Or like if I get pregnant, you're not going to like freak out and bounce on the relationship. Like there's just so much beauty within that. And it's God ordained. I love it. I was getting emotional as you were speaking. I saw tears in your eyes. I was because I'm just, I'm so, I love Jesus so much. And I love other people's faith. And I love seeing you speak about you gave mind, body, and soul.

You waited. And your obedience is just so beautiful. And I love him so much. And I love seeing you love him so much. And I love that all of us love him. Don't cry. Don't cry. We're all don't cry no it's beautiful you guys are such an example for girls and can i just say to the women listening like there's never a wrong or right time like you can always start over today you're you're not you're not too dirty or too broken or gone too far like you can always start

over today start over tomorrow. Start over tomorrow. Like do not let yesterday's mistakes stop you from starting over today. And do not let tomorrow's mistakes stop you from starting over. If you do fall in the future, we all might, you just get back up your pen

and keep going. And remember you have four sisters that have all messed up. Praying for you. Yes. Yeah. Nothing too dirty. So true. Yeah. We love you guys so much. Praying for you. Nothing too dirty. So true.

Love you guys so much. Get Maddie's book, The Love Everybody Wants. Go and watch Happy and Healthy Podcast. Subscribe to her channel. It is so worth watching, Janine. You guys are incredible. We love you guys. May the Lord bless you and keep you. May he make his face shine upon you and be gracious to you.

May he turn his face towards you and give you peace. All the fruits of the spirit, baby. She said so. Love you guys so much. God bless you. Bye, guys. Bye. That was so good.

Oh, my gosh. I love you all. you