Girls Gone Bible - Relationships | Girls Gone Bible

Episode Date: August 18, 2023

GGBBBBBBBBB! our loves. hiiiiii. today we hit our most requested topic (i think its all anyone wants to talk about lol) RELATIONSHIPS! we've touched on dating & relationships before but we believ...e it'll be an ongoing conversation within GGB because there's always so much to talk about! we touch on how important it is to be equally yoked and what God wants for us in a relationship/marriage. how it's so important our partner loves us the way Jesus loves us. we talk about red flags & non negotiables. masculinity & femininity. gender roles. how men and women can best serve each other in a relationship. we take it back to the beginning and read about the creation of Adam and Eve-- the first real relationship in the Bible! "And above all things have fervent love for one another, for 'love will cover a multitude of sins.'" 1 Peter 4:8 let's learn to love each other right. let the love we display outwardly be a reflection of the spirit of God within us. we love you so much. Jesus loves you more. -Ang & Ari if you’d like to support Girls Gone Bible 🙏🏻🕊️🤍 Paypal- https://www.paypal.me/girlsgonebibleinfo Venmo- https://www.venmo.com/u/girlsgonebible https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/girlsgonebiblepod/support

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Starting point is 00:00:00 Okay, hello everyone! Hi brothers, hi sisters! Hi friends! Look what I'm wearing today. It is GGB merch! Which one is this? The classic, uh, Jesus T. Classic baby Jesus T. I love this thing.
Starting point is 00:00:20 Take your jacket off for a minute and show... I don't need to do all that. Sorry. Hey, guess what she said to show. I don't need to do all that. Sorry. Hey, guess what she said to me. What did she say to you? What did she say? She told me that I need to be more edgy. I did not say you needed to be more edgy.
Starting point is 00:00:41 You said, you said, do you think I need to be more edgy? And I said, you don't need to be. I love your style. Could you add a little more edge? Sure. Why do you feel that way, though? I don't feel that way. We don't have to be edgy. Like, you don't think I'm cool?
Starting point is 00:00:53 I think you're really cool. You don't have edge. You're not edgy. You hear her? Do you hear this? You're edgy on the inside. You don't look edgy. You don't look like you could, you know.
Starting point is 00:01:04 Okay, when I wear my Levi's and, like, my cool and my cool leather coat, you don't think that's cool? It's a Zara leather coat. It's like brown. It's not like biker leather. So how could I be more edgy? You don't need to be more edgy. I know that I don't need to be, but how could I be? You want to be?
Starting point is 00:01:19 I would... Do you think I look edgy? Yeah, I think you're cool. Yeah, what did you say earlier? You said this was like the definition. I said you look cool. You said this is like the definition of our friend. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:01:32 You're like always in leather pants and I'm in like, what would you say? Like, you know, neutrals. Do you think I'm like dark? No, I think you're cool. You don't like a chunky shoe. I will say that. You will never see me in a chunky shoe or a flip-flop. You will never see me in a flip-flop.
Starting point is 00:01:50 But you don't even like my Ugg slippers that have a platform. Did you hear what she wears? These thick Ugg-like slip-ons. She looks like the grandfather from Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory. I love height. Like, I like getting a little height. I do, too. I do, too.
Starting point is 00:02:09 Sorry. Hi, guys. How are you? We love you so much. GGB episode... Eight? I think ten. No.
Starting point is 00:02:20 I think we're past ten, actually. I think we might be on eleven. How was your week? Good. What did I do? What did I do? This is the this is a little my worst question. What did I do? I think it's cuz oh we tried going out Saturday do you remember we left the house? We're gonna go to the beach We left the house and take a photo of her twirling me around on the beach We had this whole idea and then we leave the house and realize sunset was in 20 minutes,
Starting point is 00:02:45 and we look at each other and go, we tried. So we went back home. But other than that, nothing. Just been in the Bible. Me too. Go eyes. All right, so what did you do this week? Sorry, I was going to move on before asking.
Starting point is 00:03:01 That's so rude of me. Well, let's move on. We know what happened to me. What happened to you? Guys, somebody, I go to my car and somebody smashed my window, stole everything out of my car. Please pray for these people in L.A. and let's try not to defund the police
Starting point is 00:03:18 because I couldn't even get a cop to my house to make a police report. My Lord. Oh, my gosh. That is the best thing you've ever said. No, it's so true. That's, I'm so sorry that happened to you. I mean, just know that God will restore and replenish every single thing that was stolen from you and all the money lost and everything. And I'm really sorry. That's the most invasive, terrifying thing, anything that could ever happen. Thank you.
Starting point is 00:03:46 You're welcome. So today, guys, we're going to talk about something that is our most requested topic that people want us to talk about. Relationships. Relationships. Romantic relationships, dating. Our DMs are flooded with questions and advice about relationships. We just want to have like a little conversation, open conversation with you guys and talk about it. So today out of the Bible, we're going to start in Genesis. We're going to start in the very beginning, Genesis chapter two,
Starting point is 00:04:16 right after God created the heavens and the earth and the universe and everything. We are going to read, um, in chapter two where he created Adam and Eve. And we thought what better place than to go to the very beginning, the first relationship in the Bible, the first marriage. So we're going to start in Genesis chapter 2 verse 4. This is the history of the heavens and the earth when they were created. And the day that the Lord God made the earth and the heavens before any plant of the field was in the earth and before any herb of the field had grown for the Lord God had not caused it to rain on the earth, but there was no man to till the ground, but a mist went up from the earth and watered the whole face on the ground. And the Lord God formed a man of dust of the ground and breatheed into his nostrils the breath of life and man became a living being cool so that's how god made adam that was the first human that he ever made created and so
Starting point is 00:05:13 beautiful isn't it life in god's garden the lord god planted a garden eastward in eden and there he put the man whom he had formed and out of the, the Lord God made every tree grow that is pleasant to the sight and good for food. The tree of life was also in the midst of the garden and the tree of knowledge of good and evil. And the Lord God said, it is not good that man should be alone. I will make him a helper comparable to him. Out of the ground, the Lord God formed every beast of the field and every bird of the air and brought them to Adam to see what he would call them. And whatever Adam called each living creature, that was its name. So Adam gave names to all cattle, to the birds of the air and to every beast of the field. But for Adam,
Starting point is 00:05:56 there was not found a helper comparable to him. And the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall on Adam and he slept and he took one of his ribs and closed up the flesh in its place. Then the rib, which the Lord God had taken from man, he made into a woman and he brought her to the man. And Adam said, this is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh. She shall be called woman because she was taken out of man. Therefore, a man shall leave his Cool. That is the start of humanity, Adam and Eve. I love when he says, then the rib. of humanity adam and eve i love when he says then the rib like i because i really feel like that like a woman is literally your rib if you have a good woman by your side yeah she's like the
Starting point is 00:06:53 foundation the structure and a lot of men these days don't even realize that yeah we have a lot to talk about in terms of relationships and we can this can go like one of many ways I think I really wanted to say that so we already did uh an episode on relationships and I think that relationships are gonna is gonna be a topic like a continuing topic that we'll go over many times um just like mental health might be too because it's an ongoing conversation but I will say that our first episode we were so new to it and we were so timid and we were not being as bold as we are now because we were in a space of being like we want everyone to feel included and we don't want to offend anyone and there are some things that we said that I said at least in the first episode that I want to be clear on, like my stance on, for example, like, like our opinion, if it doesn't align with
Starting point is 00:07:52 scripture is invalid. It's null and void. That's so weird that you said that. Yeah. What did you say, though? Well, I said something like I'm talking about people living together before marriage. I said that, not you. No, we both did.
Starting point is 00:08:04 Because you said, you know, your sister did it and it worked. And I said to each their own. We said what we think, but we were kind of like, whatever works for you. It's very clear what the Bible says about it. It's not what God wants for us. And I get him. And it's something that I've done in my past multiple times of living with somebody um that I was in a relationship with so I just want to be clear on that and like yeah it's so funny that you said that I thought that
Starting point is 00:08:30 yeah I mean we're so new we like didn't want to offend anybody I know now we don't even care well yeah because we know that we what the bible says if you follow God you have to go by the word. So we have so many questions. What do you look for in a man? What do I look for in a man? Yeah. I actually wrote this down. Wow. I want, what I look for in a man is, well, a Christ-like man, a man of God.
Starting point is 00:09:08 I want secure and trustworthy. I want someone to lead me. When I can feel safe, I can drop from my mind to my heart, and you will literally get the most beautiful, best version of me. And I think men, like like really need to understand this like when we don't feel like when we have to like fend for ourselves we we go into our masculine energy and we're not like our full beautiful feminine selves and I think it's just really important to have a when a man can lead you it will be the most beautiful relationship. Yeah. Hardworking is a huge one for me.
Starting point is 00:09:49 I need a worker. I need someone that is like, you know. Absolutely. I want a good listener. And I really, you know what is really important for me too, I want someone giving. I need someone that's giving and just like you know what here you go like what's what's mine is yours like that to me is so beautiful I want someone um that really accepts me and is patient with me you know that sees my flaws and thinks it's so
Starting point is 00:10:21 beautiful because I have a lot of them I'm not I am so imperfect I want someone to look at me and be like it's okay yeah not critique me and criticize me on it absolutely no um and just a family man someone who really just like has strong values who isn't like who doesn't oh I want to be with the boy. Like I want someone who has a strong friendships, friendships, too. When I see a guy that has really good manhood, like really brotherhood, yeah, brotherhood, really strong friendships. That's important to me. But I want someone who just sees the value in family and in children. I think we talk a lot about that, like where I'm from. People are having families that like like, you know, they start at, like, 26, 27. Like, that's the most important thing to them.
Starting point is 00:11:07 And I think because it's so important to have a good woman, to have a family. Like, I don't know. That's just. A hundred percent. What do you look for in a man? All the things you just mentioned. If you say tattoos, I love tattoos. No, what I look for in a man is everything that you mentioned.
Starting point is 00:11:27 A man of God. I was thinking about this a lot before today that like, because in, I'll have to get the scripture, but in 2 Corinthians, Paul says that it's not good for you to be unequally yoked. It's not good for you to enter a marriage or a relationship with somebody who is not equally yoked with you, of not of the same faith, religion, and not at the same level. And it's like, what does, what can righteousness and what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Why would you be
Starting point is 00:11:54 with someone who's not like you and who doesn't believe in what you believe in? And we had so many questions of like, what do you do when you're unequally yoked? Should I pursue this? Is this okay? And I'm just here to say that every relationship I've had in my life up until right now have been every guy was Christian. But, like, there's a big difference between being Christian because your family's Christian and being a true follower of Jesus. And you're actively pursuing God. Come on, somebody. Come on, somebody. And you're actively pursuing Jesus. Come on, somebody. Come on, somebody. And you're actively pursuing Jesus.
Starting point is 00:12:25 It's the most important thing. And I am here to say, do not settle. Do not compromise. It is not up to you, especially if you're a woman. And if you're a guy, like, it's not your job to carry someone through the faith. Yes, we inspire each other, and we, like, help each other get refined. But it is not our job to push somebody to love Jesus no it's it's an for for all those questions that you ask it's it should
Starting point is 00:12:53 be a non-negotiable yeah a hundred percent and it's my non-negotiable and especially as a woman you need someone that can a man should be leading you if he's not bringing you closer to God then that's not from God no it's not unfortunately I was thinking we should talk about like the what what are red flags that you think um in a man yeah like for me my number one red flag I think is if if obviously if someone's not actively pursuing Jesus but like you will know within the first hour of talking to someone where they are in their faith absolutely because what you talk about first is what holds the most value to you and like I know like I cannot get in a conversation with someone without bringing Jesus up me either you know I know and we've we've
Starting point is 00:13:39 had so many dinners with people where we you know we want to talk about faith it's the most important thing in our lives and people kind of looking at us like yeah oh 100 all the time and i just so you'll know like you you can tell where someone is in their faith just by the way they talk about it um that's my biggest red flag what's what's your other ones um you know what a big red flag is or a non-negotiable yeah well a big red flag that I'm thinking of like just in early stages of dating is somebody who talks about someone who talks about their exes period that there's something weird there but somebody who talks about their exes negatively like why is every person you've ever dated the worst person ever like either one you can't be trusted because your sense of judgment is completely off or you're the problem and that's just the truth yeah and I just think when you talk super negatively about your ex
Starting point is 00:14:40 it just shows your character yeah like you're gonna do that to me then oh hundred percent yeah a hundred percent I would and I would just never lead with that I'm trying to think what other red flags there are I definitely think somebody with no I mean I guess we're talking about red flags for men we can talk about them for women, too. But a guy with no, like you said, no real, like, strong male friendships. Oh, it's when, yeah. If a guy only has girlfriends, like, something is wrong. It's just when you have a lot of solid friends, you can tell. It just shows, like, he's a strong, good guy.
Starting point is 00:15:19 Yeah. Brotherhood is so important for men. Yeah. Brotherhood is so important for men. Yeah. I think another red flag is like when, for me, control. I cannot stomach when a man is controlling. I don't tolerate it.
Starting point is 00:15:38 It's the biggest turnoff for me. If you're going to tell me I can't go out with my girlfriends, and it's vice versa. Like I, for me, like I think when you're in a relationship, yeah, you're in a partnership, but you still need to have separate lives. A hundred percent. Like, if I'm in a relationship, I want you to go out with your friends, go on vacation with your friends. If you don't trust them, then you shouldn't be in a partnership with them. Like, I'm just such a firm believer. I know a lot of people that they're like oh no I'm not letting her go like I don't know like no let let people be and if they're gonna do something you're gonna
Starting point is 00:16:12 find out yeah I'm big on that actually really big on individuality in a relationship I'll lose my mind yeah I get really freaked out and suffocated if I lose my individuality. Yeah, when they're controlling with your girlfriends and things like that. What I love about your boyfriend is he's just so, he loves me so much. Like, he looks at me like a sister. Literally. Like, he's always constantly checking on me. He's there for me. He roots for you.
Starting point is 00:16:41 He loves when you're with your friends. Like, that is so special. Yeah, it's just very secure. I think a red flag in, I guess, a non-negotiable for men but like when I meet somebody who is of like who's over whatever, a certain age, and they're telling me that they're not yet ready for marriage and for children. I'm just like, please, what are you talking about? Why didn't we say that in the beginning? That is the biggest red flag. I'm sorry, but it's just like you want to be with someone that's very clear. And today we're here to tell you that like, you need to be really bold in who you're going to
Starting point is 00:17:31 date and don't compromise and don't settle because there are a lot of people out there who will waste your time and mess you around and just like not be good enough to you. And like, don't stand for that. If they're not clear from the beginning you're if you're not with a man of god who really values and i'm not talking about just a like someone who goes to church with his parents if you're not with a true man of god who really values family and children and marriage and one and a woman you're wasting your. Don't waste your time. I don't care how much you love them. Do not waste your time because they will waste yours. There's something called the nuclear family unit, the family unit together. And this is the thing I'm probably most passionate
Starting point is 00:18:19 about. And you might say like, well, then why don't you have a family and are married? Well, because that's not God's plan for me. If I found the person that God wants me to marry, like I would have been married. I'm not waiting because I'm not ready. I just haven't found him and I'm absolute or maybe I don't know. I just am not willing to settle or compromise. Like I know that God has something so incredible for me and I'm going to wait for it. And that's just that's just. Yeah, I get the same question. Why aren't you guys married yet it and that's just that's just yeah I get the
Starting point is 00:18:45 same question why aren't you guys married yet because that's not in God's plan right now if I mean like if it came up yeah if God came knocking on my door and said this is the dude I have for you I'm like I'm with it but it hasn't happened yet for me having a strong family unit is the most important thing of life no really like yeah I think it's so important to have your own as a woman and to be strong and to to work I mean you and I we love to work but I think it's so beautiful to be a mother and take care of the kids and the and the husband comes home I just I love the role. So 1 Timothy 5, 8 says in the Bible, But if any provide not for his own, and especially for those of his own house,
Starting point is 00:19:31 he has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever. So a man who doesn't provide for his own household is worse than an unbeliever. And being an unbeliever of Jesus is a really bad sin. It's really bad. God is saying that is worse than an unbeliever. And being an unbeliever of Jesus. Is a really bad. Sin. It's really bad. God is saying that is worse. Than an unbeliever. Can you. Believe that.
Starting point is 00:19:51 It is. I mean. I'm just. I'm so glad you just said that scripture. Because I really feel like. I don't want to shed negative light today. I really don't. But.
Starting point is 00:20:04 I think it's just a huge thing. We're all like women and just even men are dealing with. And in 2023, I mean, look at our grandparents. They didn't deal with this stuff. Why? Because they weren't like on, you know, dating apps and Instagram, but, you know, scrolling and thinking that they can have something better. Yeah. So true. You know, they found a girl, they, they committed to them. And that was, that's what's, what was important now. That's like, we've lost that. We've lost what is important. We want to like go to bars and hang out with a bunch of girls and our guys. It's like, it's just, yeah. It's not not what god intended it isn't yeah this this specific scripture about saying that if you don't provide it for your own house i mean i'm i'm sure
Starting point is 00:20:52 it's different in other places in the country and in the world but we live in la where this there's an influx of i'm sorry to say but a lot of it has to do because it's not just men's fault. A lot of it has to do with modern day feminism and the idea that that like, you know, women should have their own and they absolutely should. I do. Ari does. We absolutely do. But like we there we also want a life where a man should provide for his household. And that is the bottom line. And again, it's everybody's fault. It's not just men's fault. We know it's not. Women have perpetuated it.
Starting point is 00:21:29 But you know what? Since we talked so much about guys, let's talk about women, because we didn't really cover that last time. Yeah. In what ways do you think it's important for a woman to serve her boyfriend or husband? Why don't you go first? Well, there's many different takes that we can have i mean first we can talk about emotionally i think it is our job our duty to build our men up like i think that
Starting point is 00:21:57 we have the power literally to like they're the leaders but we have you ever heard the thing that the man is the head but the woman is the neck he makes all the decisions but we guide him you need that of course I think that like as women we have the ability to make or break our husband's confidence and we like if it's up to us to like speak life to them yeah I think that's our main purpose is to speak life. And, um, cause I know I've been in relationships where I didn't necessarily speak life because when somebody is doing wrong, it's hard to speak life to them. It's easy to criticize them, but through the grace of God and the power in Jesus, you're able to have like enough wisdom and maturity to be able to speak life to the parts of them that aren't fruitful and where they're not doing well.
Starting point is 00:22:46 Yeah. And I think, you know, for a man like he when he's working, it's tough. Like men have a lot on their plate when they're at work. A lot of stress. They you know, that's their job. Like they have to be hard workers. They have to bring home the money. And I think it's our job to just be so supportive and like give them that encouragement. I'm so proud of you. Send them little texts of the day. I'm really proud of you. Be patient with them. Know that if they're coming home from a 14 hour day, maybe they're not going to be in the best spirits. Right. And just to be there and
Starting point is 00:23:19 just just to be their rock and to be patient and to understanding and not to be like, well, I need this and I need love and I need, you know, we tend to do that because we're women and we're emotional and we need love. But just to be, you know, very patient. I love that you say that. And you know what? Men so often like don't love the way that we do. Like a lot of the time they are not as emotional as we are
Starting point is 00:23:45 they're not as affectionate as we are um and so to like constantly badger them is not going to get that affection out of them and that's the truth like I've heard it so many times that guys I remember a guy said this to me and I was like wow this is the blueprint for men he literally goes all I want in this relationship is to be left alone yeah and then that will make them come to you a hundred percent it'll make them come to you like god like this is just basic basic psychology for everybody the more you suffocate someone the more they're gonna push you away and want to get away from you the more you give somebody space to be their free selves they will come after they'll come after you trust me it's a scary thing
Starting point is 00:24:25 to like let go and give distance and give them their space because you think you're going to lose them and if you have a tight grip you'll keep them it's the opposite yeah let them go give a little space you give them the freedom to come to you with that affection um and just and just really i think it's so important to have your own life when you have your own life and your own friends and your own. It's really like just yeah, just like when you have your own life and you don't make your life theirs constantly. Yeah, I think that's a great, great advice. I think a good way to I mean, the most important thing you can do as a woman for your man is pray for him like stay in prayer for him because oftentimes like men are supposed to lead us but sometimes they're like too prideful to pray that's
Starting point is 00:25:10 what i've noticed with most men is not that they they're like lack of like loving jesus it's their it's pride gets in the way because they're like i'm strong i'm a man i don't need to like surrender and pray so that's wrong but pray for him I think that's a great way to support him. Guys don't really get compliments. So just giving them a compliment, you know, after a long day or things like that. Yeah. I'm so proud of you. You're doing so great. I know you're going through a lot, but I'm here for you. How can I pray for you today? You know, things like that, like goosebumps. How can I pray for you today? You know, things like that.
Starting point is 00:25:44 Like goosebumps. That's really sweet. Yeah. You know what? Because it's just I really think it's the little things. And I think, too, when you're in a relationship for a long time, you lose these things like these small acts of kindness and sweetness that really would make a big difference. You know? You know what else? What I so what's really important to me also
Starting point is 00:26:06 is family um I you know I love my family so much and like whenever I would see my my my other partners like my sister my little sister she's my life and so when they would create a relationship with her and check up on her that meant the absolute world to me yeah and then when they would check up on my mom how are you like those little things so for me the person that I'm with you know your family's the biggest thing to you right so making them a part of your family and and checking up on them and being there for them. I think that is so important. Oh, I think that's so important.
Starting point is 00:26:49 You know, creating a relationship with the mother and the father and just becoming one. I just think it's effort. You don't ever, because if you're with someone, that becomes your family as well. So you never want to just like abandon the family. You want to really put effort into them also. I think that's a huge one. That's, yeah. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:27:11 A great way to love me is to love my family. That's perfectly well said, yep. Yeah, it's all about effort too. I think we live in a time where everybody is so selfish and we are so self-serving. And I don't know about other places in the country, but like we live in a place like L.A. where it's all about what people can do for you and where they can bring you. And is this good for my career?
Starting point is 00:27:38 It's like weird. It's so sick. It's so weird. It's I mean, me and Ari truly are. I feel like we're in we're like we're in a Babylon movie. No, literally. I'm so happy that I went through so much in my life because I have such compassion. And I don't have that selfish bone in my body.
Starting point is 00:27:57 You are so much like that. We literally will give our last dollar to someone. We're like, just take it. Being selfish is truly not what god ever wants um it's not good it's not good at all that i think that's the number one thing you really need to look at when you're in a relationship are they selfish are they you know are they starving you of love you You actually said that. And I was like, whoa, yes. Like starving you of affection. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:28:28 Starving you of your love language. What is your love language, by the way? It's changed, actually, all of them. But physical touch is always at a number one. Like you can say whatever you want to me. But if you're not like holding my hand, I don't believe you. I know. I love to cuddle.
Starting point is 00:28:46 Yeah, physical touch. And then it used to be words of affirmation, and it is. Like, I need to hear how somebody feels about me. But I almost feel like acts of service has taken precedent over that because I just feel like if you're willing to go out of your because like you can talk all you want but if you're willing to go out of your way for someone and like put yourself out to make somebody else's life easier that's true love it really really is like you have no idea how much it means to us when like say something happens with our car or you know just anything and you and we feel so safe to call you. And you guys will be right there to help us and be the man and be so masculine and just take care of it. You know what I like, too, about men?
Starting point is 00:29:35 Not men. One man. You know what's important in a man is what I'm trying to say is someone who, because, like, we're going to have problems. We're going to do stuff. I like a man who doesn't make me feel bad. Like I like a man how the other day I stopped on the side of the road and I ran out of gas. Luckily, Ari was with me. So she filled the tank.
Starting point is 00:29:55 But like, if I wasn't with you, I would have called my man. And I promise you a hundred percent guarantee. He would have come with a smile on his face, filled up my tank, whatever he was doing, and he would not have put me down. He would have not have made me feel bad. And there's a lot of men and women who, like, will take a small inconvenience like that and be like, like, you really like why didn't you think? Why didn't you think to get gas? You saw the light. You know what I mean?
Starting point is 00:30:19 And like, that's how I don't like that. I want a man who's like just cute and patient like just be I don't know there's just you have as a man the ability to make a woman's life so much easier and I just like when somebody chooses to do that I actually remember we were in the car yeah we were going to dinner and Angela forgot to put gas in our tank which I by the way have done that many times no I didn't forget. I saw the light. I just like living life on the edge.
Starting point is 00:30:48 I went a couple days. It is my fault. And I did not think I would be able to get gas and put it in the tank. But that I will tell you. And I love this about myself. I am so masculine when it comes to cars. I can fix a tire and I can put gas. It's incredible. It's the one thing I've learned
Starting point is 00:31:06 about myself this past year because I've had to do everything on my own because I've been single um and you called Christian and you told him and I was expecting him to be like how could you not think I know like how could you be so irresponsible
Starting point is 00:31:22 and he was like oh baby you good like I'll be right there like let me get some gas and I was looking at him looking at you on the phone and I was like it's a true man that is a true you know what let's be open and honest about it I've this is what I was getting to earlier how I've like gone most of my life dating guys who are technically Christian and I'm like dragging them being like, read the Bible with me. Please let me read you, John. Begging them to pray with me. And then I'm finally, this is why you don't settle because I'm, I'm dating somebody who is the truest, true, true man of God I've ever met
Starting point is 00:32:00 in my entire life. Loves Jesus. If I wasn't in the picture, he would love Jesus just as much. And it is a game changer. He is the best person I've ever met in my entire life. He doesn't have a selfish bone in his body. He would never put me down for forgetting to put gas in the car. He's just there to like, be happy, love me, right? Love me the way God loves us, like unconditionally, not because I can do anything for him but because he just genuinely loves me and like wants to make my life easier and wants me to be happy like he just wants me to be happy yeah the one thing that we never want when we're in a relationship is to like when you're when you don't feel good about yourself and you feel like less less of a woman
Starting point is 00:32:46 I think that might be a red flag yeah oh yeah when you're just not really feeling like your best self you know I I I know like even I mean I don't even know why I'm bringing you in the picture because you're my best friend. We're not in a relationship, right? But you're my person. Yeah. You are really my person. And I will just put you as an example. I like that. All right.
Starting point is 00:33:17 You bring out the absolute most beautiful version of myself. I feel smart. I feel just so good and alive when I'm with you. I do. And you have shown me that it's okay to say stupid things once in a while. It's okay that I'm not perfect and I kind of stumble sometimes and I'm clumsy and I am a little forgetful. You have shown, I, as I'm saying this, like, I just, I have this on my heart to just say that Jesus really brought you into my life at a time where I thought I was not enough. Like I thought, I'm telling you this year, I thought I was just not like, and I've said this to you, I didn't think I was good enough. I didn't think I was smart enough. I didn't think I was athletic enough. And you have truly brought
Starting point is 00:34:19 me made me see the light. And I now walk with such confidence and boldness. I've said this in another episode. But yeah, you have truly shown me that if you are with the right person, you will carry yourself. When you're with someone who is putting you down and critiquing you and, and this and that you're going to start to act like that. But when you're with someone who's patient and is like, it's okay. Like, you will want to learn things. You will want to do new things. You'll be confident. You'll feel alive.
Starting point is 00:34:54 You'll, you know, you ever hear that thing where someone's like, when somebody says something enough to you, you'll start to believe it? Well, that goes in relationships. That even goes in friendships, if I'm being honest. Yeah. That's why you have to be very careful who you're surrounding yourself with that's why we're we only have a little tight circle yeah wow you honestly just freed so many people by saying that because it's so true that people can destroy your confidence for no reason yeah and a lot of the time it's because
Starting point is 00:35:28 they're insecure most of the time it's because they're insecure anybody who's continually putting you down for things that are somewhat out of your control and that are harmless and you're obviously not doing it on purpose they are don't get me started I'm gonna start saying some mean things like that I I cannot deal with those people at all and there's so many people be paid don't make somebody feel worse about something than they already do that's what you and I I said it last week about you how sometimes I'll make a wrong turn almost crash hit the curb like drive up on the thing that I'm not supposed to drive on and every time I look at you in, in preparation of you being like, like, what's wrong with you? And every time you're like, like, you never make
Starting point is 00:36:10 me feel bad because you don't want to, because you don't have that within yourself that you get off on making people feel bad about themselves. Can I say one more thing about you? Um, something that I've learned, I'm going to just say this. this I sometimes I can be a little bit impatient like I'll be like all right come on let's go let's go let's go you are truly the most patient person I have ever met like it is it is so Christ-like I can't even tell you guys the way she handles people even like me like you're a lot more patient than I am um but you if someone if someone is doing something that's really like annoying I see what you do and please you guys should really learn from this because it's it's so good for relationships can you just say what you do
Starting point is 00:37:00 she almost you take a deep breath and I think you're just like, what do you do? Do you just do like, tell us what you do. Because now every time something bothers me or annoys me that someone does, I literally think about you. And I'm like, and I handle it so much different. And then when I do what you do, when I just talk in a calm voice, it diffuses everything. And the whole situation is just like so calm and nice. And, you know, you know what? Thanks for bringing that up.
Starting point is 00:37:31 First of all, thank you. I love you so much. I just want to start off with saying that this is only the patience is only a product of being close to Jesus. Like, period. I was not always like this. I have had my fair share of toxic relationships. Like I really have. I have been in screaming rap matches. I have really acted in ways that
Starting point is 00:37:51 God forbid, like I would be very embarrassed for anybody to have heard it or to have seen it. As I've gotten older, I've learned so much about people in general, but especially men. so much about people in general, but especially men. I know now like men are very simple creatures. I know that men do not respond well to being nagged. They don't respond to it at all. They don't respond to criticism. They don't respond to like attitude. They don't want to, even if we're right, having an attitude with a man is the worst thing you can ever do. You're never going to win unless you have a man with like truly absolutely no spine and that's like not a relationship you want to be in anyways like men respond to us being feminine like that's to us like coming to them with in a calm voice and speaking our minds like we have, I truly believe that women are so, this is what feminism should be.
Starting point is 00:38:46 Like we are the most powerful, like we are able to control situations by just being calm and being kind and being sweet. And that's all, I just know that. Like I know what men respond to and it's never attitude. They don't want to hear it., I know what men respond to. Yeah. And it's never attitude. They don't want to hear it. It just sounds like this to them.
Starting point is 00:39:08 Yeah. And listen, we don't take BS. Oh, absolutely not. Whatever. And also, if we're in something where our needs aren't getting met. Absolutely. And the man isn't stepping up after a certain amount of time. Like, girls, don't sit there and be in it and
Starting point is 00:39:27 nag and fight and why and what do I do and should I be patient and should I stay? Absolutely not. You take a deep breath and you say to myself, I'm worth more than this. I know my value. I'm a valuable woman or I'm a valuable man. And you walk. Yeah, absolutely. Because you don't want to learn the hard way and stay in something
Starting point is 00:39:45 and then you're like oh my god i nagged him and i kept you know yeah and and then you're gonna blame yourself for nagging even though you were right that you should have nagged because they weren't acting right but again it's like a it's like a catch-22 you deserve to nag because they're not doing right but you shouldn't nag because you're never going to get what you want from them yeah i can't even believe we just reach an hour i that it goes by so fast and the problem is we didn't even get to like the question question and that was our point you know what we should do let's do a part two genius absolutely genius let's do a part two and we'll do we'll do this video and then we'll do a part two so we can answer all the questions for you guys and get everything covered because we really want to dive deep into it, too.
Starting point is 00:40:27 I know. Exactly. And that was honestly our point from the beginning. We love you guys. Cut this one. We love you guys so much. May the Lord bless you and keep you. May he make his face shine upon you and be gracious to you.
Starting point is 00:40:40 May he turn his face towards you and give you peace. Get our merch.

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