Girls Gone Canon Cast - ASOIAF Episode 45 Theon I, ADWD
Episode Date: March 29, 2019This plan is madness. But the trees called him by his name, "Theon," and he must take a leap of faith if he is to save Jeyne. It rhymes with pain. Eliana's twitter: https://twitter.com/arhythmetric ...Eliana's reddit account: https://www.reddit.com/user/glass_table_girl Eliana's blog: https://themanyfacedblog.wordpress.com/ Chloe's twitter: https://twitter.com/liesandarbor Chloe's blog: www.liesandarborgold.comÂ
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Hello and welcome to episode 45 of Girls Gone Canon, Theon 1 in A Dance With Dragons and Theon Outro.
I am Chloe, one of your hosts.
You can find me on the internet as LiesInArbor on Twitter, Tumblr, and at LiesInArborGold.com.
And I am Eliana, another one of your hosts.
And you might know me as GlassTableGirl from the A Song of Ice and Fire subreddit,
from the Maester Monthly Podcast.
Maybe you know me as Arithmetric over on Twitter.
Welcome.
Guys, we have a new POV this week.
It is Theon Greyjoy moving off from Reek.
I don't know if you've heard of him. He's kind of a big deal.
Yeah, kind of a big deal in Pike.
You know, the Iron Eyes.
He totally said that
to someone. There's no way he didn't say that to someone.
He definitely Ron Burgundy'd it in those first couple
chapters when he got back, right?
Totally.
His apartment smells of rich driftwood um
we are getting very close to hitting our stretch goal on patreon we want to hit a thousand dollars
a month and then treat you guys to a live stream uh we're looking at the end of april for that live
stream so stay tuned for some more details as we get closer.
If you want to check out our Patreon,
you can head over to patreon.com slash girlsgonecanon.
We will always have free episodes up every Friday,
but we do have a lot of bonus content
that will go straight on Patreon.
So we really thank you for pledging to us,
or we welcome you to listen to the episodes every Friday.
Yes, we are obviously going to continue Theon's storyline with that Winds chapter
this week before the end of March. But, you know, speaking of things happening at the end of April,
there's also something really big coming in mid-April for our fandom.
Yes, I've heard about it. It's that show that the books we're reading are based off of,
Game of thrones if
you've heard of it it is it is i'm really excited you know yeah it's gonna be over finally
we can all just we can all just go die we can all be like the only like i'm ready to die now
i'm so ready for bran stark to ruin everything as the Night King you know I'm just oh my god ready
well okay no obviously we are being a little bit facetious but we are excited especially about this
new last season of Game of Thrones because we are going to be doing some Game of Thrones content for
you guys Tuesdays uh after the episode we'll be putting out episodes in the evening detailing the last episode,
just chatting about what we watched, talking about what it means for the community,
what it means in general for the show and the plot, and even what it could mean for the remaining books.
And of course, most importantly, what it means for me and Chloe.
Yeah, like when Sandor dies, you know i'm gonna be a fucking mess that's gonna
be the episode it's gonna be you sobbing yeah that's what we're gonna put out there and that
is what you can get if you pay five dollars to our patreon monthly oh my god yeah this one will
come out of course as being part of our game of thrones content yeah every tuesday streaming chloe breaking down now
we have another announcement you know after we finish up this very new pov of theon we are moving
into another pov of course yes our new pov our next pov and i hope you guys like it because
we are going to be doing it for a little bit of time. Probably almost to the
end of the year. We're going to hit another point of view
at the end of the year finally but
this is going to take up some time.
Yeah, so
buckle in
because we're doing one of
the longest
POV arcs
and we are going into the other
outsider in Winterfell.
Jon Snow.
Snow, Ned!
Under the snow!
Yeah!
Our next POV is Jon Snow, the man
himself, the Song of Ice
and Fire himself.
I'm very excited about that.
As much as I tend to joke and jive
oh, this is gonna be awful, it's Jon. There will be some episodes that I may not be as excited about that. As much as I tend to joke and jibe, oh, this is gonna be awful, it's Jon,
there will be some episodes that I may not be as excited about. However, there will be some
episodes that I'm very excited about. He has some of the best supporting cast, the North is always
interesting. And spoiler alert, he dies at the end. So he does. And I think it's going to be
really interesting to look at Jon's beginnings again, as we come to this end, right, of Game of Thrones, the show. And as you all know, Jon's character has more of a storyline at the end, right? Because it's...
About him.
The books are based, yeah, the books are based on the show so oh my god and of course you have to look at how the show is
completely canon when it comes to like john chose the right woman in the end you know kit harrington
mary rose leslie egret so anyways that is the episode where i will probably sob for an hour
i'll be sobbing that was my first like man when i started reading these books i loved egret egret
was my care i mean you can see that i guess eg it was my character she's very spicy and just she's very eager she's the best i
love her she's a very colorful bird as we talked last episode she is anyway we're not there yet
next week everyone yes i'm really excited that's we get to go back to winterfell get to see dad
one last time or two.
So we do have a lightning round to get through, so we'll move on through that. Our lightning round will consist of all the chapters between Theon I and between a ghost in Winterfell.
Yes, starting off with Tyrion X.
Tyrion and Penny are sold into Yezen's household.
Jorah joins them.
Tyrion plays brown-bent plum after a successful
joust. Jaime won. After lifting the siege at Raventree Hall, Jaime encounters Brienne of Tarth,
who claims to have found a maid of three and ten.
Jon 10. Alice Karstark is married to Sigurd by Melisandre under the Lord of Light.
Jot imprisons Cregan Karstark before hearing news of Hardhome and the horn of a returning party.
Daenerys VIII While the powerful Myrines celebrate peace inside the gates, Meereen still suffers a siege.
After holding court and contemplating Tatters' company, she returns to unhappily bed her new husband.
So that brings us to Theon I.
Mission impossible.
Theon Greyjoy has Abel's word that he will not fall back into the clutches of Ramsay Bolton,
and they enact the plan.
Break Lady Arya.
Lady Arya.
Free of her tower.
Jump and remember your name.
Day stole upon them, just as Stannis had, unseen. Winterfell had been awake for hours,
its battlements and towers crammed with men in wool and mail and leather, awaiting an attack
that never came. By the time the sky began to lighten, the sounds of drums had faded away,
though warhorns were heard thrice more, each time a little closer.
And still the snow fell.
Theon remembers then some of the tales that old Nan told them of winter,
after hearing a stable boy joke that it's like hardly even winter.
The storms raged for forty days and forty nights for a year for 10 years storms that buried castles and
cities and whole kingdoms under a hundred feet of snow in a dance with dragons george really is
hammering home that the weather the snow is not a joke winter is truly here we see it from quotes
from other characters in the north as well not not just in Theon's chapters, like Tormund when he talks about his son. When the snows came, though, snow and sleet and freezing rain, it's bloody hard
to find dry wood or get your kindling lit, and the cold. Some nights, our fires just seem to shrivel
up and die. Nights like that, you always find some dead come the morning. And of course we get it in
Bran's chapters as well, with the cave in the north, the snows had buried most of them again, but they were still there, hidden, frozen, waiting.
It really builds up this whole sense of foreboding and heightens the stakes, something that can be
really hard in, you know, this act of a fantasy novel where he's at in the story. It's really
easy for the story to fall flat, which in A Dance with Dragons, we kind of see that in some parts.
It's really pleasing with the pacing of the books, especially considering the five-year gap affecting
his writing, whether intentionally or unintentionally, which I think at this point,
we kind of know it's intentional. You really get the world of white, of purity, and then Theon's
chapters come, and with all this murder in the north, you get these slashes of red tainting them.
Even in Ash's chapters with Stannis, we get that great glimpse of the other side of the fence.
No burnings today and none tomorrow, but if the snows continue, how long before the king's resolve begins to weaken?
Yes. Also, the more you read this, I just kept thinking again, because you said it at the beginning.
Snow, Ned, snow!
Absolutely. Underneath the snow is Azor Ahai. kept thinking again because you said it at the beginning snow net snow absolutely underneath the
snow is azora high i also love the way that george again kind of subtly hints with that religious
language again and how this is still framed through all that because old nan saying that
it snowed for 40 days and 40 nights is reminiscent of many other moments that are 40 days or 40
nights or you know 40 years if you really fuck up in the bible like during the great flood and noah's ark it rained for 40 days
and 40 nights and that cleansed the world of sin and to start anew and it's very much like what you
were saying about like all of this purity as opposed to like the red slashing the white there's
the other way that winter can arguably be that act of cleansing,
sort of purge, which is, I think, a really dark way to view it. But it is kind of that,
like, we're going to lose a lot of really good people during the winter. But it also sets a
stage for a lot of those bad people, like the evils to be rooted out before we get to spring,
which is, of course, a time of rebirth and starting anew.
And winter is also very much a test for all of these kinds of people.
Jesus went into the desert for 40 days and 40 nights to fast and go be tested by the devil. And George points towards this a lot, I think, in Aaron's encounter with Euron and the Forsaken.
Because as we've discussed, Aaron's story has a lot of parallels with Theon.
Winter's going to be that test of faith. Faith being a big running theme throughout this chapter for like
everyone. Yeah. Theon breaks his fast in the back of the hall chewing yeast from a dark ale as he
watches Abel's faction. He thinks Abel's plan may not be so mad. As Roose and Walda enter the hall, other lords are eating.
Horsbane Umber, Aenys Frey, Roger Riswell, Wyman Manderly, Lord Locke.
Ramsay appears, and he is in a foul mood.
Theon prays that he will not take it out on him.
Theon tells Abel that, alright, this plan that we have, it's not gonna work.
Abel just, like, plays his lute and reass and reassures him that like stannis is our salvation think that theon thought believe that tell yourself it's true
he warns him that ramsay will hunt his people which um yeah probably abel promises theon though
that he's going to keep the unsafe no matter what my prince ramssey though argues with ruse at the days it's very dramatic like
keep that shit behind doors when ramsey walks in he goes straight to ruse and he's all like
and arguing and i hate you dad how dare you fuck this bitch uh all the northern men are feigning
obliviousness and like eating their food and chitter-chattering but walda's like face is
bright red and dion can't make out what they're saying from that far in the back and i do love but
we did have poor quentin on last week and we had a really great time with him discussing theon he
has a post on tumblr it's a response about what ruse and ramsey were arguing about and he basically
explains in this post why the death by ramsay is dramatically satisfying
for ruse because no one else scares ruse and no one else could take ruse on except you know maybe
stannis as his true nemesis but between you know the inheritance issue and walda being pregnant
with ruse's child ramsay torturing and murdering people who don't call him ramsay bolton all the
signs really do point to daddy ros going night-night here.
Yeah, there's nothing quite like saying I hate your new marriage and my new stepmom quite like killing your dad.
Yeah, exactly. It's a big fuck you, you know?
Yeah, George turning these things up to 11.
Theon, though, wonders what's going to happen when I, Theon Greyjoy, die.
Am I going to go to the Drowned Halls?
Like, who's going to bring my fucking body there?
Is my ghost going to just wander Winterfell?
No pain Theon had ever known came close to the agony Skinner could evoke with a little flensing blade.
Abel would learn that lesson soon enough.
And for what?
Jane. Her name is Jane, and her eyes are the wrong color.
A mummer playing a part.
Lord Bolton knows, and Ramsay, but the rest are blind mummer playing a part lord bolton knows and ramsey but
the rest are blind even this bloody bard with his sly smiles the jape is on you abel you and
your murdering whores you'll die for the wrong girl damn chills there's a lot in there we had
come close actually uh and by we sorry i'm not in this story the only one that had come close, actually, and by we, sorry, I'm not in this story.
Theon had come close to admitting the truth of Jane and Arya the night before, but he just, like, couldn't do it.
The singer seemed intent on making off with the daughter of Eddard Stark.
Which, way on the nose, or on the rose, I should say, right?
Because Bail the Bard, Abel the Bard able the bard bail the bard get it yeah i mean like this is actually where they got the idea to name the music software ableton i made that up that's
not true don't take anything i say it's true don't take her seriously ever uh the doors in the great
hall open up and it's hostine fray and shit just hits the fan he's got a body in his arm and he's covered
in snow there's been another murder and it's little walder the big one merit's son the body
in sir hostine's arms sparkled in the torchlight armored in pink frost the cold outside had frozen
his blood oh he dies where bran fell by the way out at first keep which is broken like bran now it
reminds me a lot of that same thing with sansa too leaving the castle how eddard left the castle
in king's landing yeah i think all this is a really good catch i would have never thought
like oh yeah that's where bran fell yeah they said it was the broken tower and i'm like oh shit that's
it's bran yeah i'd have just been like whatever whatever. It's that boy. It's that boy, what up?
That other boy.
Roose, though, wants to know where the body was found,
that Chloe can tell you.
Yeah, I'll tell you, Roose.
Solemn yet loud, he's speaking,
and Big Walder tells him that, yeah,
like you said, he was found under the First Keep,
and his gloves, they are caked with little Walder's blood.
I told him not to go out alone,
but he said he had to find a man
who owed him silver this actually kind of reminds me a little of pate's chapter yeah oh yeah you
know i don't think there's a faceless man there right now but anyway similar vibes same energy
ramsay demands an answer of who the man was but big walder can't provide an answer he's just like
i guess it was a white harbor man uh because you, they're the ones who taught him how to play dice.
This is really cool, because it's totally just pointing to,
Wyman's gonna be that double cross we didn't get in the show, you know?
He already is.
And, okay, tinfoil theory, you're not the only one who gets to make them.
What if Wyman wrote the letter?
The red letter.
I think it'd be interesting but i'm also
just like why man yeah but then i want to know the like i've been in discussions about the pink
letter even though i'm like who gives a shit but i want to hear your idea of why the best pink
letter theories which i think like in the end it's probably not really that fancy it was probably
manson wrote it or something who knows it's probably a fucking ramsey yeah that is the least fancy and also especially as we get through this chapter i i kind of feel on this
like 18th reread of this chapter i think that a like able slash mance might actually die i think
i mean all the all the washer women are getting killed off here so it's kind of like it may be
that letter is true and it is ramsey but it would be interesting if it was wyman manderley there's really no evidence for why it
should be it just would be interesting i like the idea of barbary as well being the person to author
it but it's probably just ramsey there's a lot of yeah there's a lot of interesting creative
theories out there some are like you know out there some are some are not i there's i think something compelling to me i think
this one's more tinfoil you know that it was mance right co-authored by mance in an attempt to like
i see his character work there in terms of trying to get his son back i think that um aaron not
great joy aaron aka admiral curd on reddit admirald has a really great theory of it being co-authored with Alistair Thorne
as a way of getting back at Jon or something, throwing in the bones.
It's creative.
There's a lot of creative theories out there.
It's just so open.
Yeah.
But at the same time, we know where Theon is right now.
So I think it was probably written by ramsay and yeah
it's probably honestly it's written i do think that but you know i'm like what else it's fun
it's fun this is fun look at all the fun we're having to quote tyrian i confess that i know
little of this poor boy lord ramsay squire was he not how old was the lad nine on his last name day so young said wyman manderley
though mayhaps this was a blessing had he lived he would have grown up to be a frank
damn what a sick burn
that he lived he would have grown up to be a fray
got him
y'all should be glad that it is winter
so you can put some ice on that burn
okay
dracarys
dude
damn like hashi is
throwing a table into Manderly.
He, like, rips his sword out.
He slices Wyman in the chin.
There's blood squirting out.
It's pretty obvious from this scene.
Wyman's probably going to be left in pretty rough condition.
He's going out to lead armies after this, but he's alive enough to go out like a bamf.
But once he turns tides to Stannis he can go out with some honor
against ramsay's faction you know he's definitely gonna die in this winter though yeah definitely
he's absolutely the embodiment of that thing we were talking about a few episodes ago of like the
old men going out into winter to die like wyman's ready this is it for him even ruse is like standing
up and freaking out like whoa what the fuck like stop what are you guys doing you fucking animals stop pull them apart yeah um lord wyman pushed to his feet
only to collapse old lord lock was shouting for a maester as manderly flopped on the floor like
a clubbed walrus in a spreading pool of blood around him dogs fought over sausages oh my god
did george really just call mandanderly a clubbed walrus?
What the fuck?
How did they never notice this?
Anyways, it takes 40 dreadfort spearmen to settle down all of the action.
Six Manderly men are dead.
Two Freys have died.
Dozens are wounded.
Ramsay's man, Luton, is dying super noisily.
So Ramsay goes over.
Our true buddy, he's just such a good friend.
You know, like Ramsay is a paragon of virtue and he puts Luton out of his misery.
What a nice guy with a spear to the chest.
Yeah.
He gives him the gift of mercy.
Yeah.
Ramsay learned more about mercy than any character in this book so far.
So horses, dogs, and all the people are still freaking out.
Roose finally calls everyone's attention.
I see you all want blood, the Lord of the Dreadforts said.
Maester Rodri stood beside him, a raven on his arm.
The bird's black plumage shone like coal in the torchlight.
Wet, Theon realized, and in his lordship's hand, a parchment.
That will be wet as well dark wings
dark words he tells them they should be wasting their energy on killing stannis and assembles
the frays at the main gates and the manderleys to the east for first strike i think this is
definitely what we're going to see happen in king's landing as well with the martel lannister
tyrell factions and all that suspense gearing up, all that tension in the capital.
There's not enough room for all these families,
and we're seeing that in this small keep in Winterfell.
Yeah, you're seeing it play out in miniature
across all of the different things in this story so far.
Yeah.
Even across the Narrow Sea, whatevs.
After Ramsay further tells the men to obey my lord father obey my dad whose wife i
hate uh ruse requests that able come and play and it's time for the plan as able begins to play a
sad soft song theon grayjoy didn't recognize sir hostine sir anis and their fellow frays turned
away to lead their horses from the hall.
Of course, we all know what that sad, soft song that Theon doesn't recognize is.
It's more than likely Jenny's song.
The same unnamed lack-of-lyric sad song we hear from Tom-07 and Rhaegar.
High in the halls of the kings who are gone, Jenny would dance with her ghosts.
It fits in with this song motif of Abel, the bard, and being a hero from the songs for theon and what theon's about to do his summoning of courage is much like sansa's here
you know i must be brave from like a lady from a song and songs and music very much outline this
chapter with the war drums and also abel's loot yeah you can think of it as like the suspenseful music during the escape scene
but i like that idea that it is jenny's song like jenny dancing with her ghost that's very much
theon these past few chapters as well as like jenny if you rearrange some of the letters and
throw in an e instead of another n it's jane that's it exactly jane and theon dancing with their ghosts rowan then grasps the arm and
says like we have to go give lady aria her bath now and tian's like this is very bold all right
it is daytime all right but there's no other time that they can do it and they just have to do it in
time to go to stannis if they want to get saved and theon says though abel is doomed they're
all like he's gonna be fine yeah mance does this all the time he'll be fine kind of and this is
what escalates to that no chance no choice moment here you know seven brienne thought again
despairing she had no chance against seven she knew no chance and no choice this begins up now
it's the thematics in feast dance that we
see all across the ripple effect brienne's fight theon's leap to faith john protecting his pack
trying to get to aria it's just a recurring theme and it's outlined really nicely in this chapter
yes absolutely like later in the chapter theon thinks like matter and matter like escape had
seemed unlikely with all six of abel's men he also thinks of the plan as
like it's just madness it's hopeless foolish doomed and he thinks like of the singers you
know going back to this idea of abel being such a big figure here as half mad and the stories of
the heroes and life not being a song um as you're talking about sansa wanting to be as brave as a
lady in the song and this idea of madness i think also hangs over the story of A Song of Ice and Fire.
And that question of what is madness?
And I think we get one answer to that in the form of characters and monsters like Ares, Joffrey, and Ramsay.
But I think that we see our protagonists also ask themselves these questions a lot and that line between madness and bravery or as it's phrased in Daenerys's chapters madness and greatness two sides of the
same coin very much a blur oh absolutely everything is turning white in the godswood as well
even the mud was icing up the edges Theon saw is coming. Rowan gave him a hard look.
You have no right to mouth Lord Eddard's words.
Not you.
Not ever.
After what you did.
You killed a boy as well.
That was not us.
I told you.
Words are wind.
Okay, first things first.
Obviously, washerwomen have been behind most of the deaths, except for that one.
We know who really killed Walder. It was other Walder.
But these are as much his words as anyone else's in the North, so Rowan can fuck right off.
I'm just like, it's a very common phrase, okay?
Like, it's not anyone's fault that the Starks tried to trademark this very common phrase a la Taylor Swift.
Like, you can't just be like yeah this thick beat or
winter's coming is only I can say them there's a comedian and he has this joke about how you know
you can say whatever you want in the world because no one owns words obviously the repercussions for
saying certain words exist but no one owns words and uh I'd like to tell Rowan right now that no one owns words.
Okay?
I also think it's interesting that as Free Folk, you know, Rowan and them have such respect
for Lord Eddard and his words, even though obviously they were like on opposite sides.
Yeah.
And to be fair, that's the thing.
Lord Eddard and the North, they all, you know, stayed separated for a reason,
and they lived cool when Eddard was there.
Like, yeah, well, we'd like to go south, you know,
and escape the blinding death from White Walkers.
But Lord Eddard was never their enemy.
You know, he didn't lead raids on them ever or really give a shit about them.
Just if they were deserters and shit.
So, I mean, he was a good man, and I think that's what George is kind of trying trying to echo here is that even the wildlings were like yeah well lord eddard stark he was a
stark of winterfell man that's how starks are they disagreed but there was respect there
theon is very annoyed by all this and he tries to set the record kind of straight he's like i've
done terrible things i betrayed my own turned my, ordered the death of men who trusted me.
But I am no kinslayer.
While Rowan says they get that they weren't truly the brothers,
Theon thinks on the miller's wife and the many times he bedded her and her son's blood on his hands.
There is blood on my hands, but not the blood of brothers, he said wearily, and I've been punished.
Not enough.
Rowan turned her back on him.
Theon thinks about ending her and her sisters with his blade right there and right now,
but ultimately he decides against it, which, you know, I guess that's progress for Theon.
I guess.
You chose not to kill woman for no reason?
That's just because you were mad? That's a good thing, Theon, buddy. You chose not to kill woman for no reason? That's just because you were mad?
That's a good thing, Theon, buddy.
You're doing good.
I guess he's never really done that per se himself.
No, he's just thinking about it.
Yeah.
Theon's arc brings up those thoughts that we're always aware of constantly, thematically
in A Song of Ice and Fire.
Who deserves forgiveness?
What constitutes penance being served?
You know, like, what makes it so I'm on a redemption arc? What pushes you to that level? of ice and fire who deserves forgiveness what constitutes penance being served you know like
what makes it so i'm on a redemption arc what what pushes you to that level squirrel returns
to the rest of the washerwoman and she's armed with only knives to rescue aria and they plan
on going in as six and coming out of six it's not it's not a good number you know placing aria with
one of the washerwomen squirrel who's like of a size with quote unquote Arya.
And Squirrel, who's known for her namesake, says she's going to climb out the window.
So now it's Jane playing Arya playing Squirrel.
And HBO was obviously too scared to have someone pull this off on TV.
So, you know, even though Arya pulled off David Bradley.
And they could have had Jane remove her face to become Arya and then become Squirrel. You know, even though Arya pulled off David Bradley. And they could have, like,
they could have had Jane remove her face to become Arya
and then become Squirrel, you know? I'm just saying.
They could have, or they could have just done, you know,
something that, what, Tatyana
would have done. And then Jack and Hagar could have been in Winterfell
killing the people off. See, I adapted it.
I adapted it.
You're welcome, HBO. Here's season five.
I'm sorry, they adapted it? You I'm sorry they adapted it
you adapted I adapted it
from the show to the book wait what sorry
George what oh god fuck my cover's
blown you're adapting
the show adapting as the book
adapting as the show just like
Jane and Aria and Squirrel
you know me and Manu
on Twitter he's from the podcast
The Scene of Ice and Fire. He's great.
He's one of our buddies.
We were just talking about how good David Bradley and Maisie and the Arya and Walder
bits are in like season seven and season six and all that.
Like just the acting with just them together and then the acting as them as the other person
together just blows my mind.
It reminds me of Helena Bonham Carter as Hermione in Harry Potter as Bellatrix as Hermione.
Yeah. Or as Lindsay Lohan and Jamie Lee Curtis.
I'm joking.
Exactly, exactly.
And with all of this, Theon then enacts his part of this plan.
He's to go sneak into the kitchens to go fetch water.
Sneak, sneak.
It rhymes with reek.
The guards are used to his weirdness so they like let him through
they're like all right reek you fucking weird ass come on in he uh he asks for six pails of hot water
and to be quick for the lady aria and they say they'll do it at once but realistically it still
takes like 45 minutes which can't help theon's anxiety and modern technology doesn't exist so
and i mean like i'm gonna be real even with modern technology
sometimes it feels like it takes forever for the water to boil i like i know i got this like water
heater thing but actually i don't right now i just have a fucking kettle but it feels like forever
i feel that i feel that exactly the guards begin to question who the new handmaidens are and what
happened to the old ones dion says the old ones were fired.
The water they kept bringing was cold.
You know, like, get a fucking move on, you guys.
Yeah, but they did like them better for the reasons why it would have been cold, you know, because they flirted with them.
Yeah.
While the troops march on, Theon goes back towards the keep, and the sergeant outside is surprised at, like, Arya's need to, like, take a bath again.
Two days in a row.
Yeah, Theon darkly thinks, well, when you share a bed with Ramsay, like, yeah, you'd probably need a shower hourly, bitch.
Oh my god, yeah, just even, like, emotionally.
It's a real feeling.
As they near Arya's tower, they must then sneak past Ramsay's chamber,
and Theon advises all of them to keep their heads
down and their hoods up and rowan agrees yeah i do love the build-up that's coming in this chapter
as we race through just this breakdown of what's happening it's already we're halfway through and
my heart's like bottom bottom bottom because this is like a like we said mission impossible yeah i
mean they are halfway there they are living on a prayer.
Yeah.
Chloe.
And I do want to point out before we continue on that we will get to some very sensitive kind of moments in this text coming up when we see Jane Poole again in the tower.
So if you are of the gentler heart and you do not want to listen to, oh, themes of abuse and torture that have happened to her.
Please tune out now.
And so they climb the stairs, and Theon thinks of the many trips that he's done up these stairs,
such as this one time when he was, like, a much younger boy running up,
and he knocked old Nan down in the hall.
He earned a couple of hard beatings then,
but apparently they're not as hard as when his brothers used to beat him.
He also fought Rob on these stairs with wooden swords, and he was trained by Sir Roderick.
Oh, that's sad.
Remember Sir Roderick, everyone.
Who said that fighting on the stairs would give them an advantage,
because if you know how to fight an enemy on difficult terrain,
and also when you have the higher ground, like one good man can hold a hundred.
I'm interested if that will come back
it really stuck out to me on this reread that little sir roderick memory i wonder if theon
will go out that way you know fighting down a flight of stairs or something for someone
maybe flighting a stair of others or an enemy an interesting echo i wanted to point out because
it just really stuck out on this reread yeah i think that that's a good point it's the only way
he could get like a sort of even advantage with you know all of his missing parts exactly in terms of feats and
fingers that was long ago though they were all dead now jory old sir roderick lord eddard harwin
and holland kane and desmond and fat tom allen with his dreams and oh allen sorry micken who
had given him his own micken for his real sword.
Even old Nan, like, is not.
We are not throwing this out there.
It is not confirmed that old Nan is dead.
She dead.
Stop!
And Rob.
Rob, who had been more a brother to Theon than any son born of Balin Greyjoy's loins,
murdered at the Red Wedding, Butchered by the Freys.
I should have been with him. Where was I?
I should have died with him.
Ah!
So sad. I should have died
with him!
The gods are not done with you yet, Theon Greyjoy.
I should have died with him.
It's just
the saddest part of theon's arc everyone's
here wishing vengeance for their dead kinsmen wishing they could go back to a time before the
red wedding existed but theon is what's left behind he's that remnant he's the ghost in
winterfell that hasn't been able to move on he hasn't been afforded being moved on theon is the
only person who wishes he could have been at the red wedding. I should have died with
him. And Theon is so, so framed as a disciple to Rob and a disciple that betrayed him. I've seen a
lot of Judas references to Theon before, but I actually feel like he's closer to Peter in biblical
stories. After a little while, those standing there went up to Peter and said, surely you are
one of them for your accent gives you away.
Then he began to call down curses on himself and he swore to them.
I don't know the man.
Immediately a rooster crowed.
Then Peter remembered the word Jesus had spoken.
Before the rooster crows, you will disown me three times.
And he went outside and wept bitterly.
Peter eventually serves for his crimes and is accepted
back into Jesus's grasp and goes on to become a bishop in the church. Jesus's church is built on
Peter's confession to his crimes and turning from Jesus. As I mentioned, all of this is built into
that theme we discuss of who's repented for their sins, who deserves redemption, and most good
fantasy stories and fairy tales have that
theme of redemption laced into them somehow i mean we look at the grim little mermaid start at the
beginning here so little mermaid she comes up you know she doesn't talk she's you know blah blah blah
gonna fuck the prince whatever so it doesn't work out he doesn't love her her it's like the third
day coming up to you and she's like fucked you know like she's like gonna be stuck there mute
forever with legs and living sadly as he marries someone
else and she has to watch and be there every day.
And her family comes above like at the water at the boat and they're like, we got you this.
We traded in our beautiful mermaid hair so you could have this like knife, this dagger.
And all you need to do is you need to stab the prince and you need to let his blood wash
over your feet and then you will have a tail again and you can come home again to us and then like instead she decides like not to she's just so sad
she can't kill him because she loves him so she kills herself and her body like falls into the
water and she turns into sea foam and in the beginning of the story they talk about how
when mermaids die they turn to sea foam and they don't get real souls and they have to go around doing good deeds for like a bajillion years until they get enough
done so that they can have a soul and they can go on to the afterlife and so theon is kind of that
little mermaid right now like he's gonna have to do these good deeds until he can go to his
afterlife and be put to rest but in so many ways because like his family's all trying to be like, come return to the sea, take this knife and do bad shit.
Join us.
And then he's like, no, and then he loses.
Wow.
What if Theon is not just Cinderella, but the Little Mermaid?
I think he's all of these fairy tale characters, man.
It's true.
It's all rooted deep in fantasy.
He's afraid to be the hero in the song, but he's going to do it.
Exactly.
he's afraid to be the hero in the song but he's gonna do it exactly guarding aria's chambers are the two dumbest bastard boys grunt and sour alan theon thinks the gods are on their side for once
they enter the room after some guard banter and they cannot find aria until they do she's huddled
in a dark corner and piled in wolf skins outside a, a horn was blowing. A trumpet. The frays assembling for battle.
Theon could feel an itching in his missing fingers.
Theon tells Jinoria that he has brought some friends.
And then the furs stirred and an eye peered out, shining with tears.
Dark, too dark.
A brown eye.
Theon?
And then we have Rowan telling her that her that like we're here to take you to
her brother and jane pool foolishly responds with i don't have a brother but aria has a half brother
lord crow john snow but alas she's too far gone jane pulled her wolf skins up to her chin no
this is some trick it's him it's my my lord, my lord, my sweet lord. He sent you.
This is just some test to make sure that I love him. I do. I do. I love him more than anything.
A tear ran down her cheek. Tell him. You tell him. I'll do what he wants, whatever he wants,
with him or with the dog or please. He doesn't need to cut my feet off i won't try to run away not ever i'll
give him sons i swear it i swear it rowan whistled softly god's curse the man i'm a good girl jane
whimpered they trained me oh jane fucking i don't care who does it but i want someone to take little finger and i want them
to bleed him dry i want them to cut him open like truffet like just like slaughterhouse that just
bleed his ass dry i mean maybe ramsey will do it he did avenge the red wedding you know oh my god
yeah no it's just it's so horrible like that this is what peter bailish does to jane like
this is not all right this is not sex work this is trafficking okay peter bailish is he trafficked
a young girl an 11 year old girl was trafficked into sex slavery he's like doing this on this like
awful systemic level of it's just like a different sort of monstrosity as Ramsay, where it's that torture, but Littlefinger enables this to happen multiple times to Jane, and it's still not enough.
I'm a good girl. And it reminds me of when she's taken for the first time to Peter,
because Jane hasn't done anything wrong, right? As Sansa says to Cersei, she's like,
where is Jane's father? Why can't Ser Boros take her to him instead of Lord Peter having to do it?
Where are you sending her? She hasn't done anything wrong. She's a good girl. And Jane didn't deserve any of this this like i know i guess some people hold it against
her that she made fun of aria but like that doesn't warrant what jane undergoes there's a
lot of religious language and symbolism throughout these chapters i i just want to quote our lord and
savior john snow and by that i mean barrett gondarian maybe viserian and
actually no it's jesus all right the words of our lord and savior jesus christ he that is without
sin among you let him cast a stone at her and if you do i will hurl a whole ass boulder at you
you hypocrite this is in the bible it's in the gospel it's absolutely said that he said no one gets to be mad
i know i read this in a dance with dragons the bible yeah yeah jesus said you cannot be mad at
jane pool just as it is illegal to hate sons of stark um honestly if you are mad at jane pool
there are cops outside of your front door right now waiting for you to come out ready to arrest
you and put you in the people that hate
sansa start camp yeah and then bring you to hell yeah that's that's just how it works you know if
you want salvation you have to we don't make the laws we simply enforce them are we not some people
say we're narcs but i have called the cops on many of the gene pool yeah i have told you know i've
gone to confession i went and i told the priest what you did and jesus heard it yeah he did and yeah jane is very much a product of the society that trains
women like to do as they're told and to be obedient and like for what like nothing good
fucking came of this she hopes it's gonna save her and it just doesn't the spearwives hurry them
along the guards will hear the sobs soon.
Holly commands Theon to get Arya up and shake courage into her.
Rowan asks what happens if she screams, and Theon thinks, then we are all dead.
I told them this was folly, but none of them would listen.
Abel had doomed them.
All singers were half mad.
In songs, the hero always saved the maiden from the monster's castle.
But life was not a song, no than jane was aria stark her eyes are the wrong color and there are no heroes here only whores even so he knelt beside her pulled down the furs touched her cheek you
know me i'm theon you remember i know you too i know your name and as jane begins to try to speak
her name he hushes her telling her they will get out of there.
But also, a horse can be a hero.
I know that he's like playing on like that word stuff.
But I'm like, Theon, the whole point is, you know,
things can be more than one thing.
Like in the movie Inside Out, you can feel more than one thing at once.
Well, and you have this raid alongside Quentin dying in this book,
thinking that he's the hero
and the whole time he's saying i'm the hero and this whole time theon is thinking well i'm not
the hero and that only happens in songs and there are no heroes here i'm not the hero which leads
us directly to that ending where theon realizes oh shit i am the hero i have to do this now everyone
else is dead yeah and i think that's what makes it such an interesting parallel, right,
to why we put this after Sansa's storyline, because again, he's quoting that life is not a song with Sansa's friend. There's just a lot to unpack here. Like there's that reversal also from those
previous chapters where Theon had to remember his name being Reek. But he always remembered
Jane's real name. And now he's asking Jane to do to take on that role of remembering to be Arya so that they can
all survive this terrible moment right now. Because like the horrible fact is for some reason no one
fucking cares about Jane Poole's suffering except for Theon. They only care if she's Arya Stark.
And this all ties back to like something that we see in how Theon still needs to confess like to
himself some of the bad
things he's done if he's ever going to atone like earlier on when he's thinking about the Miller's
wife when Rowan is accusing him of killing Bran and Rickon he still thinks about how yeah they
were the Miller's wife's sons and then he feels sad about her but he also doesn't really care
that they were not truly Bran and Rickon yet goes, the two we killed were just some Miller's sons.
And I think that word just, it shows Theon's disregard for the sons and their lives.
And it's very much indicative of the nobility's inability to recognize the lives of the lower class and those who aren't named or they don't carry powerful names.
like those who aren't named or they don't carry powerful names and i think this is the other side of that coin of jane needing to be aria for any of the lords or even like the spearwives to care
about her want to save her yeah and we'll definitely talk in a bit about where that puts jane
after this chapter yeah she's naked beneath the wolf skins and teeth marks cover her breasts
everyone's horrified and the spearwives
hand theon squirrels clothing to put on her he thinks if the gods are good the guards won't
recognize jane westerosi society is shit all right this is one of its big sins along with
not recognizing people with not powerful names like living in the north living north of the wall
is hard you gotta face like fucking zombies and ice stevens but the
spear wives don't have to endure this and they recognize that they're like not expected to endure
it they're like this is this is terrible no i mean they're enabled to end that you know they're
spear wives they if some guy and their clan ends up trying to you know force themselves on them
they're gonna stab them they're gonna hit them with a spear and say get the fuck out of my tent like jane doesn't have that same option jane is stuck in this torture and it's
expected it's so terrible theon tells her not to cry not to run and just keep your head down and
your hood up and he's gonna stay beside herour Alan makes some evil guard banter at them after he grabs at Willow's breast.
Theon thinks they're really lucky he didn't grab Squirrel's breast.
And for a moment, he almost felt giddy because they didn't even look.
They walked right by them.
But his fear returns as he gets onto the steps.
He worries they'll all be skinned alive if he's caught.
He feels helpless.
They're still in the castle,
and anything, anyone could give them away.
And somehow they avoid the guards, though.
But Theon feels pity for them,
because when Ramsay realizes that Arya has gone,
he's gonna flay them all.
The washerwomen abandon their pails
as they exit the Great Keep,
and everything is super snowy around them, and the trenches grow higher than their heads, although the castle is still all around them.
This chapter is constantly trying to keep you in place of where in the castle you are as you read along. All of it is preparing for that environmental switch at the end.
switch at the end. They split up.
Frenja and Holly go with Jane and Theon, and Willow and Rowan and Myrtle go
to find Abel. Like
I said, it really won't surprise me when
they all die, but
even if the guards let us pass,
there's no way through the outer wall,
he thinks. Well, there is.
There's a way. Where there's a will, there's
a way. It's not through it. Can't
go through it. You can't go under it.
Can't go under it. Gotta go over it.
They arrive at the battlement gates, finally, where their easy part of the journey ends.
The guards ask where they're going, and Theon offers them the girls he brought for them.
Like, hey, I know you want to know where we're going, but I was just coming here to offer you these women.
It's like that scene in mulan right where they pretend to
be concubines everything comes back to mulan for me oh my god holly and frenya offer themselves
to the guard and they lean in to kiss them all sexy like and as they pull away they've killed
them and the guards are gushing blood and jane of course, screams. Yeah. And I mean, this whole time as we've been born, Jane screaming has been a huge potential
risk for like blowing their cover with this plan.
And Theon thinks like Jane would have screamed if the guard had fondled her instead of Willow.
So we were pretty lucky there.
And like, of course, part of her screaming and that that nature is Jane's trauma.
But I actually think that what's interesting is this is, in fact,
consistent with the Jane that we meet in A Game of Thrones.
So from Sansa's chapter in The Hand's Journey,
his cloak was blue, the color of the sky on a clear summer's day, blah, blah.
Anyway, here the veil dies.
And then Jane Poole went so hysterically that Septa Mordain
finally took her off to regain her composure, but Sansa sat with her hands folded in her lap.
Yeah, I think it's interesting because this chapter really outlines how childlike Jane is, right?
Like, she's small, she's fragile, her bust isn't even blossoming, and now she's probably so malnourished it wouldn't matter everything that happens in front of her and to her in this chapter i'd be
screaming too right like i'm a woman and i just be like ah the whole time because it's awful
she's a little girl and she's been wholly and awfully abused so of course she's just you know
a very broken little bird yeah she is i i just think it's a tie-in and like this score as you said like child this
sensitive girl yeah to do all this theon clasps his hand over jane's mouth and they run frenya
lets theon jane and holly go stays with a spear to hold off the men that they hear forming below
and trumpets sound within the walls. Throwing this out there.
Frenya.
Frenya channeling that Squire Dalbridge.
Yes.
Dalbridge vibes.
Yes, very Dalbridge.
Holding it down.
Squire Dalbridge.
As they reach the stairs,
Theon slings Jane over his back
because she's weak in the cold
and she's just faltering
and he starts to climb.
He slips on the ice
and he falls down onto his knee at a point.
He begins to think this is it.
They're at their end.
They hear shouting and Frenya fights half a dozen guardmen off.
He shouts, where do they go?
And Holly realizes, darkly, that Frenya has the rope to get down from the battlements with.
And then in that moment as Holly is like like fuck a quarrel appears in holly's
stomach the crossbow men are in a line in the inner yard and then a second one appears between
her breasts as she grabs a merlin and she's dying as she falls shouts ring out from their left jane
pull was staring down at holly as the snowy blanket over her turned from white to red. On the inner
wall, the crossbowmen would be reloading. Theon knew he started right, but there were men coming
from that direction too, racing toward them with swords in hand. Far off to the north, he heard a
warhorn sound. Stannis, he thought wildly. Stannis is our only hope if we can reach him. The wind was
howling and he and the girl were trapped. The crossbow snapped,
a bolt passed within the foot of him, shattering the crust of frozen snow that had plugged the
closest crinnel. Of Abel, Rowan, Squirrel, and the others, there was no sign. He and the girl
were alone. If they take us alive, they will deliver us to Ramsey.on grabbed jane about the waist and jumped yes the actual leap to fame literally
literally that's so good it's so good it's like i read this full disclosure i read this the other
night and i cried like three times in this chapter because it's such an emotional chapter right like
this is like there's so much big stuff and just like Jane, you know, like I'm a good
girl and Theon, just the grabbing Jane around the waist and drumping with that is just,
finally, we've all been waiting for it.
We've all been waiting for Theon to finally take that moniker.
Like you are Theon.
You are Theon Greyjoy and you can be the hero again.
You can still come back.
It's never too late to come back.
And the leap to faith is something we've
obviously been talking about the last couple episodes a lot of theon's chapters have heavy
religious and philosophical connotations surrounding them which fits super well as
they're transferring from ramsay as reek's god to stannis as theon's god where his salvation lies
a heretic kirkagard was known to describe the leap of faith as Adam and Eve's qualitative leap
into sin, and that the leap into faith is directly usually tied to the paradox quality of Christianity.
And there's a lot you can read about that in Philosophical Fragments and another of his books,
Concluding Unscientific Postscript. There is this passage in Concluding Unscientific Postscript
I'll read that I really like. When someone is to
leap, he must certainly do it alone and also be alone in properly understanding that it is an
impossibility. The leap is the decision. I am charging the individual in question with not
willing to stop the infinity of reflection. So it's super important because Theon's finally
put his own safety and self-being aside and he's finished that idea of infinity reflection on who he is, who he was, and who he wants to be or can be.
In this moment, he makes that leap for Jane and to be the person that he knows he wants to be deep down.
In that moment, he becomes a believer that things can be different, that he can play a role in that,
and that he and Jane can survive this and get to Stannis. he sees it as his no chance no choice moment yes absolutely i think that's a perfect
breakdown of theon's arc and everything culminating in this moment and of course this isn't the end
of theon's storyline in a dance with Dragons yet. As you said, there's
very much of him reclaiming being a hero, Theon, and he doesn't believe he's a hero yet. But,
you know, we get that ending actually in The Sacrifice.
Yeah, The Sacrifice chapter is something that follows this obviously chronologically
moore's umber finds jane and theon aria and theon and delivers them to stannis
via taiko nestoris and it turns out that he's the one who's been blowing the warhorns
yeah which is kind of hilarious i have a tinfoil again yeah go ahead tell me the tinfoil again. Yeah. No one really cares. Go ahead. Tell me the tinfoil, Liana.
So, obviously, Big Walder killed Little Walder.
But what if, you know, like, it'd be funny if it were, what, Mors Umber or maybe one of the Umbers, because Horsebane Umber's in there, but only because, like, he has to be
because they have the Grey John in hold by the Freys.
And, like, what if they're the ones who killed little
walder just so dissension within like the bolt and ranks weakening them for like stannis's army to
come as the way like crow food umber has been doing little by little by by blowing those war
horns and picking them off yeah and of course as we learn later on we'll discuss this in our
patreon only episode for theon one in the winds of winter crow food ends up
getting punished for this in the end but you know this is such an incredible scene and it's a perfect
capstone to that leap of faith tycho nosaurus shows up right he's here and he says you are the lady
asha of house grayjoy unless i am mistaken i am asha of house grayjoy, unless I am mistaken. I am Asha of House Greyjoy.
I. Opinions differ on whether I'm a lady.
The best.
The Bravosies smiled.
We've brought a gift for you.
He beckoned to the men behind him.
We'd expected to find the king at Winterfell.
The same blizzard has engulfed the castle, alas.
Beneath its walls, we found Morzumber with a troop of raw green boys waiting for the
king's coming, and he gave us this. crossbite. The old man, no one would ever think him comely. She had seen scarecrows with more
flesh. His face was a skull with skin, his hair bone white and filthy, and he stank. Just the
sight of him filled Asha with some revulsion. He raised his eyes. Sister, see, this time I knew you.
Asha's heart skipped a beat. Theon? His lips skinned back in what might have been a grin.
Half his teeth were gone, and half of those still left him were broken and splintered. Theon? His lips skinned back in what might have been a grin.
Half his teeth were gone, and half of those still left him were broken and splintered.
Theon, he repeated.
My name is Theon.
You have to know your name.
Yes.
Oh my god.
We got him back.
Our pair of larvae is back.
That's how I feel.
It's so good. It's such an earned capstone and ending after we've done like this
whole book and like i know that people dislike the repetition of like where do whores go and
tyrian storyline and and sometimes you know sometimes the repetition of some words can be
a little too on the nose but here just works so well yes absolutely absolutely it's definitely that closing of an arc as well
theon finally found himself i think we can all agree right there he's been trying to find himself
this entire time so the sacrifice is really important to bring up here because it just
closes it all in a nice loop and as we enter into that wins winner episode for patrons you're really
going to see a lot of that come into play as well yes absolutely and like this is the end of as you
said one part of theon's arc there's still more to story there's still more development internally
as we see he still has some things he needs to atone for there's also of course jane is still
very much part of the story she's still playing aria stark for a lot of this she doesn't get to have her name back yet and along with all
that she's lost already now uh she has lost some of her prettiness because of that frostbite on
her nose though i like that asha thinks that she would be pretty if she weren't so frightened
that's such an asha thing to think i think because she she's asha grayjoy yeah nothing to her nothing she's not afraid of anything
and she just sees other i mean jane does look like a pretty beautiful little girl but
that's what she thinks well if she wasn't so frightened she'd be pretty that confidence yeah i it's so asha but it's such i don't know it's it's the most fist pumpy moment
of dance oh my god it is a very fist pumping moment it gets me really excited for the wins
winner which is coming out next week it is it's coming out tomorrow it's coming out right now
right under my chair look under your chair it's under yours too man that was an emotional episode emotional chapter i need to crack open a lacroix
but i hope my fucking god lacroix sponsor us
it's an emotional arc you know we can we can talk about how the fizzy water is uh snow yes the fizzy water is snow? Yes, the fizzy water directly correlates to snow.
Well, I know I'm kind of sad.
I'm excited to go into Jon.
I'm excited to transcend kind of some of these themes into Jon,
these themes of never belonging,
as we'll go into the themes of, you know,
the Prince of Winterfell being the last one left,
the ghost of Winterfell, the ghost of the North,
watching, you know, the brother that should have survived rob die
they both have very similar feelings about rob theon and john have a lot in common that we're
really going to get into in the world's longest pov arc in the whole entire universe well no
tyrian's is longer right tyrian i think is longer tyrian or aria is longer. The longest ones are Tyrion, Arya, Dany, and this. Jon.
Johnny boy.
J. Snow.
Johnny boy.
J. Snow.
But, you know, we aren't
done with Theon exactly yet.
We do have one more
Theon episode coming out, his Winds of
Winter chapter, that will be
available for our patrons
also this
week for our March Patreon
episode. Yes, so excited
about that.
Check in on that for sure.
And
of course, you know,
you don't have to pay
to hang out with us and to listen to us.
Just keep up, right?
You can find us on social media as
Girls Gone Canon over on Twitter,
or you can shoot us an email. Let us know what you
think at girlsgonecanon
at gmail.com.
Yeah, and as always, you can
subscribe to us on our many platforms.
We are on Podbean, where we
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iTunes, Google Play, and Acast.
So I have been one of your hosts, Eliana, also known as Glass Table Girl.
And I have been one of your other hosts, Chloe. You can find me on the internet as
LiesInArbor or LiesInArborGirl.com. Goodbye, everyone.
See you next week for episode 46. Keep the faith.
Keep believing. Jump to faith.