God Awful Movies - 273: Climate Hustle 2
Episode Date: November 10, 2020On this week's episode, Cara Santa Maria from the Talk Nerdy podcast joins us to shill for Big Polar Bear. --- Check out more from Cara on the Talk Nerdy podcast --- If you’d like to make a per epis...ode donation and get monthly bonus episodes, please check us out on Patreon: http://patreon.com/godawful Check out our other shows, The Scathing Atheist, The Skepticrat, Citation Needed, and D&D Minus. Our theme music is written and performed by Ryan Slotnick of Evil Giraffes on Mars. If you’d like to hear more, check out their Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/EvilGiraffesOnMars/?fref=ts All our other music was written and performed by Morgan Clarke. To hear more from him, check him out here: https://www.morganclarkemusic.com/
Transcript
Discussion (0)
Now we're going to debunk the existence of extreme weather.
Kara, any thoughts on this?
Or is your entire state on fire again?
I can't hear you through the action the air.
I don't know what you're talking about.
Well the title card said facts on this part.
Yeah, the title card here is Facts Extreme Weather.
And basically, they just bring out a bunch of pseudo scientists to be like,
the weather is not extreme.
Talk to me when a tornado can skateboard.
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!
Not awful.
Movie.
Movie.
Movie. movie. movie. movie. movie. movie. movie.
movie.
movie.
movie. movie.
movie.
movie. movie.
movie.
movie.
movie.
movie. movie.
movie.
movie.
movie.
movie.
movie.
movie.
movie.
movie. movie.
movie. movie.
movie. movie. movie.
movie. movie. movie. movie. Jersey. Yeah. That friend Eli Bosnick. Eli has a going, uh, not legal fast enough.
He's not legal fast enough.
kept warm by the white hot rage I have for this movie.
Oh, I felt that through my, my headphones.
Nice.
And also joining me is veteran guest
mascast science communicator, podcaster.
And my fellow panelist on the upcoming incredulous episode 50 streaming
live on Saturday the 14th, I think at one PM Eastern carousel.
And Maria, Kara welcome back.
Thank you.
I am not happy to be here.
It's a pattern.
Triple crown.
Speaking of which Kara what amazing science documentary
posted by 90s TV Hercules, are we going to be talking about today?
I heard. I heard when you said science, it was in quotes, right?
Air quotes, right? Any time we say science today, it auto corrects in our Google Doc, it's weird.
Did you mean lie? I did. I did. Um, like so like today, like we're
gonna be talking about like climate hustle too. Wow. Excellent. That was your AOC impression.
I was really AOC impression. Yeah, it was not an impression of actual AOC. It was an
impression of them doing a horrible impression of AOC with like a child.
A nine year old girl. It's gonna be so mad when she gets older and realize what they did to her.
She's gonna be so gay. She's gonna get so gay just out of her bench to her parents.
She is. She's gonna be like the most feminist lesbian. They then pronouns all up in those parents.
It's gonna be amazing.
And her parents are just gonna lose it.
Their heads are gonna explode.
Look it forward to it.
All right, and Eli, how bad was this movie?
Well, if you liked climate hustle one, but it didn't have enough deep state crazy and
child political props, you will love this movie.
This is what happened.
The people who made climate hustle one,
saw out of the shadows and thought,
oh, damn, we've been working way too hard.
Look at all the shit all we had to do is put scary words
on the title cards.
Damn.
Done.
All right.
And is there anything y'all would like to nominate this one
for being the best at being the worst at? Yeah, I'd say that this is the best worst sequel that's basically just the first movie all over again.
What was the point?
Indistinguishable.
You could just like shuffle the scenes like cards and make two movies again, same thing.
Yeah.
Damn it, now that's going to be climate hustle three.
Thanks for giving them that idea. All right, well, I'm going to be climate hustle three. Thanks for giving them that idea.
All right. Well, I'm going to go with best worst message from Vimeo on my screen.
So to watch this movie, you have to go to climate hustle two dot net or co something.
I don't know. And then eventually the link brings you to Vimeo.
And you have to spend way too much money renting this movie. And every time I put my mouse over my screen,
it would say, you rented this. Like a constant reminder mocking me.
Yeah, it's the only thing in my Vimeo queue now. So guess that algorithm is broken.
Yep. One by one, we bring all your algorithms down till you have nothing left, but God
awful movies, camera. And I was going to go with best worst host. So this is the second
time this has happened now, the first time being the unmeasurable. Kevin Sorbo obviously has some specialized all be in your movie,
but I'm not leaving my vacation contract that he is offering to Christian slash to the scientific
cinema. They might as well like watch him at lunch with this. I'm sorry, they actually do watch
him at lunch. Yeah, that's right. He eats a pretty large percentage of a cow or tries to.
He eats a pretty large percentage of a cow or tries to.
Yep.
All right. Well, we're going to take a quick break to furiously hit refresh on the election
results.
We're recording it on Friday.
And then we'll be back to tell you all about climate hustle too.
While we furiously hit refresh on the election results, while we talk about it.
Well, then I guess I'm going to drink all this scotch by myself.
Go, go.
Hey Eli, did you send my dad, uh, why are you holding a bottle of scotch near the
keyhole to Heath's room? Oh, I'm trying to brush his teeth.
You're you are brushing his teeth? Yeah, yeah, he hates it.
Well, why don't you try quip? I mean he appreciates a bone mo as much as anybody
But I don't think that's actually gonna get him to brush you know Eli Eli quip the electric toothbrush
And now it connects to the free quip app so you can earn amazing rewards like free products and discounts
So wait they reward you for brushing?
Exactly quip also delivers a brush head,
floss, and toothpaste refills every three months starting from $5. Shipping is free, so you can
save money and skip the store. And if you go to get quip.com slash awful, right now you'll get
your first refill free. That's your first refill free at get quip.com slash awful. Spell g-e-t-u-i-p dot com slash awful.
You hear that, buddy?
Rewards for flossing, huh?
Why the Scotch under the door and I'll think about it.
Oh, Eli, box in a string trap.
Yeah, let's do box in a string trap again.
Mr. Sorbo, Mr. Sorbo, Kevin Sorbo.
Oh, damn it.
Are you gonna serve me a child support summons?
Um, no.
No.
Oh, hey, that's great.
What do you kids want?
You want to buy an autograph?
I'll sell you an autograph.
Well, maybe later, it's just what we're making our climate change movie.
And we're wondering if we could interview you here right on this beach.
You, you want to randomly interview me on a beach and put it on your movie
We sure do Mr. Sorbo
You know what why the heck not with some movie about okay, so it's all I don't
I don't care. I don't care more stream time for K sorbs
But hey tell you what if you see some guy dressed as a UPS man and he asks for me don't tell him where I am okay kids. Alright you got it. Okay. Hey you how old are you? Um 15. What's And we're back. And we're going to start this movie in its very first second with the
producer, science denialist, Mark Marano thrown away his mask like there's note cards in
a movie about a little debate club that could. That's right. This movie went back and inserted
a scene where they shat on surgical masks just to get the
anti-science bingo card
To start the science documentary not a good start. I don't even understand this like this notion of
Mask suck, but I'm wearing one before I take it off
If you didn't want to wear a mask because you're an asshole,
why would you have it on and then throw it away?
He's going freestyle with me.
What I love is that he's like,
well, if you hate the shutdown from COVID,
they're gonna do a climate shutdown.
Didn't really have time to flesh out
this baseless accusation, but if you're watching this movie,
you're gonna buy it, am I right?
You're gonna buy it.
They have to shove COVID in here fast.
And then all these people are like,
mm-hmm, yeah, we buy it.
We totally buy it.
Yeah, apparently COVID is a conspiracy
to keep land above water and save the environment.
Moving on.
Oh, and what a move on we are going to do. water and save the environment. Moving on.
Oh, and what a move on we are going to do.
Because we're going to start our movie again with mini AOC.
So stupid.
And the only thing less funny than right wing slams on AOC is the fact that a parent is forcing a child to do it.
Yeah.
That poor girl. And this a child to do it. Yeah. No, that poor girl.
And this is supposed to be negative.
There's supposed to be like doing a parody of AOC,
but it's not working.
She's adorable.
Oh, yeah, she's really endearing.
The thing that's frustrating is that they make her like,
say, the word like multiple, like times,
but they've scripted her perfectly.
And it's obvious that she's struggling to read the script.
She's not an actress.
She's probably just somebody's daughter.
Very much.
Yeah, that they asked to do this.
So it doesn't sound natural, which makes the whole bit backfire.
Yeah. No, it's gross.
It's super, super awkward.
But yeah, they're trying to make fun of the green new deal here.
They point out that the green new deal would cost $93 trillion.
Right.
And it's a news person interviewing AOC being like, oh, it's going to cost $93 trillion.
What do we even get for that?
Oh, existence.
Oh, that's not terrible. Oh, yeah, we just we're just
not going to melt into the surface of the earth. That's what you know, because I plan to
take it with me. What? All right. Just negotiating the price of existence across the table with
pieces of paper. Like, no, no. So yeah, we're doing this. It is weird though how much that little girl looks like AOC.
Oh, yeah, absolutely.
She looks like her.
She's adorable.
Best.
Yeah.
Excellent.
So with our second intro out of the way,
it's time to roll the credits,
which might as well read,
Climate Hustle II is brought to you by
the literal phenomenon of climate change, all right?
What?
Is movie is produced by C-Fact, which is funded by Peabody Energy and Murray Energy.
Hey, company.
Of course.
Now bankrupt.
Well, it was funded by them, but now it's funded by a donor-advised fund, right?
Which is fancy talk for energy companies that would like to hide their direct support
of things like this.
But don't worry, this donor advised funds stated goal, just in case you were worried that
this was too shady is to quote, safeguard the intent of libertarian and conservative donors
and quote, oh my God.
That's worse.
That's so how worse.
Yeah, it's like starting a cult, but like you put in your motto
that there's definitely weird fuck stuff going on.
Yeah, exactly.
We're not a cult,
but we definitely are all fucking the cult leader.
This is a confusing metaphor.
I don't know.
You were saying it was negative or positive.
Regardless, the next thing that we see on the screen is
no carbon credits were harmed.
I mean, everyone in the credits was harmed, but the carbon credits were harmed.
I was also harmed by what?
Yes, everyone watched it.
God, how is that something to be proud of?
Also, C-Fact was created to find free market solutions to environmental problems.
That's what carbon credits are.
I'm right.
No, it just reminds me of that study.
And now it's a pretty old study, like 10 or 15 years, where they took people who were
avowed conservatives versus people who were aved liberals. And they gave them the option to buy a compact fluorescent light bulb or an incandescent
light bulb.
And most people chose the light bulb that was cheaper.
Well, the other one was $93 trillion.
So they put the price tag on it and people go, okay, I want the cheaper bulb.
But then when they put a tag on it that said something, and I'm totally misquoting this study because it's been so long, but something that said like,
this bulb is better for the environment, even though it was cheaper, a certain percentage
of conservatives chose the one that was not better for the environment.
What?
Like to make a point. It's great. It's like, it's a point of pride.
Environmental spite buying.
Yes. This is actually a phenomenon. I mean, that study might, might have surprised me any
week, except for Friday, November 6th, when we're recording this episode. We just did a,
a national survey on whether or not we would put the eco-friendly light bulb up our asses
to bone the lips. So turns out about 30%.
Yeah, turns out half the country was like, well, I'm racist.
And speaking of racist, go to the courts to figure out if we put the light bulb up or
the last time.
And speaking of racist, now we get our very first shot of Kevin Sorbo and he is looking.
So wait, remind me who Kevin Sorbo is.
Why does he matter?
Hercules, the legend journey continued, I don't know, Hercules from the 90s, from like
bad TV.
So like, why is he so involved in all this garbage?
Okay, so I'm so excited to share this story with you, Cara.
What I want to do is listen to all of God awful movies. I said, 271 back to one.
And then back from there to 272 for anybody who's joining us for the first time this week.
We're going to get some review.
So K sores was hercules in the 90s.
You know that.
He guest appeared on Zena a couple of times a far superior show.
But he was a wooly Hollywood person, right? Classic
LA wooly liberal. But then one time when he was at the chiropractor, they cricked his neck
too hard and he had a stroke. While he had that stroke, yeah. While he was recovering from
that stroke, he ran into that. I can't tell if he lies making up this story. No, this is true.
While he was recovering from the stroke, he ran out of that sweet, sweet, hercules money. So he decided to make up that he had seen God or had a near death experience
or something vaguely Christian to like do a book tour or write a book or be in a movie or whatever.
What he didn't count on is that Christians have no celebrities before him. All they had was
fucking Dean Kane. So they jumped on that shit and put him in every Christian movie from 1989 until whenever
the fuck his most recent movie came out.
And he has been the Danny Trejo of Christian cinema ever since.
Wow.
And apologies to Danny Trejo for saying that, by the way, I know he's a nice guy.
Right.
He's great.
Yeah. But for whatever reason, he now I know he's a nice. Right. He's great. Yeah.
But for whatever reason, he now looks like he's been listening to every physical description
we've ever made of him on this show since we started this show on a lot.
He's having a rough couple of decades.
But yeah, he's basically going to introduce this movie by saying everyone says we're wrong.
Few a bunch of clips of everyone saying this movie is wrong.
Right.
And I'm just nodding along.
I'm like, uh-huh, uh-huh.
True.
That's true.
Also, uh-huh.
A bunch of news sources that you're showing.
Yeah.
A lot of legitimate scientists.
That's where you would say it.
So yeah, then he says they tell us the world is going to end.
And I wrote in my notes, I mean, we tell you that too, but it's obviously
going to be a sky wizard making the stars fall out of the sky.
Read our book.
Right.
Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right.
Right. Right. Right. Right.
Right.
Right.
Right. Right.
Right. Right. Right.
Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right.
Right. Right. Right.
Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right the five scientists they were able to find. None of them are climate set. Well, that's not true. There's like one retired climate scientist,
but most of them are economists.
Yeah.
That tells you something.
We're right there.
Exactly.
All right.
So now we're going to cut over to Mark Marano outside of the Palace of Versailles in
France because, well, honestly, because he wanted this movie to pay for his vacation
in France.
Right.
Wait, was that the actual pal Sir Versailles or was it a green screen?
I can't tell.
I think he was actually outside the palace of Versailles, yeah.
And why did he dress up in a costume?
Because he wanted to use his French king costume.
Right.
It's just been in the plastic for years now.
He's pulling it out.
Right.
But again, the point that he's trying to make is that like climate elites are just like
Louis XIV, you know that familiar touchstone to climate deniers.
Yep.
Speaking of which, let's talk to Margaret Thatcher's science advisor to see Lord Christopher
Monkton. Oh my God. He's so scary you guys. And like, I, you know, I'm not the one on
the show who is going to berate somebody for their appearance. Eli. We will. It is a brand. It's a brand. It is a thing. Like, I don't want to be throwing ad hominem left and right.
But like, I was made uncomfortable looking at him.
Yeah.
Like, don't put him on screen.
Like, when they say he has a face for radio,
like, this guy is, he looks like Quasimodo,
legit like Quasimodo.
Literally Quasimodo.
Why didn't they do it in front of Notre Dame?
Exactly.
That would have been opera pop.
He was so scary.
Yeah, he was scared.
The eyes are going up.
Like his left eye was in my apartment at one point.
Came out of screen like the ring.
It was fucking terrifying.
Oh, it's fantastic.
And I love too that like the takeaway of the whole movie, the whole point that they're trying to make is not just that climate change is a hoax and that you're being lied to by the liberals,
but that the purpose of the quote hustle is to establish a new world order where there is a global government
that controls the economy.
And they keep talking about it
as though it is a climate monarchy.
And I love that the first example of a guy
to denigrate the idea of a climate monarchy
is a guy who literally works for the monarchy's own Lord.
Like what is the... Lord slavery feudalism is here to tell you about Brad Pitt secret agenda.
Yep.
And they ask him directly.
They're like serious question is the UN Secretary general going to be a sun king.
And he's like, yep.
That's what I'm saying.
And then they show us a bunch of actors.
And apparently the claim is that actors are stupid,
and then they're like,
back to you, Kevin Sorbo, tell us more about this.
Ha ha ha.
I want it to be one of those like,
John Oliver interstitials,
where they put the big flaming stamp on it and go,
oh, your knee.
Every time.
Every time.
Yeah. And when we're talking to Kevin Sorba, by the way, he says, it's, you know, these
fancy Hollywood elites love to tell us not to spend too much carbon, but that's kind
of like when Marie Antoinette said, let them eat cake. And I love that. I love the aura
Boris of stupid here because one, it's like the opposite of when she said
that.
And two, she never said that.
So it's a beautiful layer cake of not knowing things.
That is like the quote of the show, I think.
It's a beautiful layer cake of not knowing things.
Climb it up a little too. Abuse a layer cake of not knowing things. The climate us all too.
A beautiful layer cake.
Let the me layer cake of not knowing.
And for more on layer cakes of not knowing, we're now going to talk to Mark Stein, who's
the author of a disgrace to the profession.
But for a second there, I thought the movie was just letting us know that Mark Stein
is both an author and a disgrace to his profession, which I don't know, refreshingly honest.
Oh, yeah.
I love the kairons in this movie because it'll be like, so and so, Professor Emeritus
of whatever author of over 200 peer reviewed journal.
Like they love to be like, this guy's serious.
He's a real person, but also banned by Google and academia.
Somehow still has 200 studies.
It's complicated.
Right.
Also, 200 retracted beer.
I'm sorry.
I let you that they're all former members.
I feel like my wonder.
What?
And so the claim here is that like, all right,
we're talking about the UN becoming a monarchy
and having the sun king and reducing carbon in a monarchy would be bad.
Right.
I mean, I don't get it.
Part of that scenario is bad.
So yes, like the monarchy, like reducing carbon during a holocaust
has negative elements in the weird scenario you set up there.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
So now we're going to shit on Al Gore.
Oh, yeah.
And the way we're going to shit on this is Al Gore says to reduce your carbon footprint,
but does he do that?
Yeah, right.
So because Al Gore sometimes flies Southwest.
And then is like, yeah, by carbon credits every time I fly, they're like, it's funny because
they want to be mad about the fact that he flies.
And then they want to make fun of him for buying cart.
Like they want to just not give him any outs, basically.
Also, they're making a movie about how climate change is fake.
And now they're caring about carbon.
But face right.
Right. D-D-D-D-D-D they pull a clip from a hit piece YouTube video about Al Gore
created by the National Center for Policy Research, which is a conservative think tank.
So we now have a conservative think tanks YouTube video inside an oil companies propaganda movie, the layers of knowledge get deeper and
deeper and lower and lower.
And you're probably thinking, okay, what does Jim Inhoff think?
That's exactly.
I feel like what they did is they were in a room and they had, you know, the little
note cards like producers do where they have all the different beats of the movie.
And they're trying to arrange them on the screen or on the wall saying, okay, what are we
open with? Then what comes next? And they're literally like, what has the most impact?
Shit on our gore, mini AOC, Jim Inhoff's snowball. Like, there's too much good shit. I don't
know where to start. And it's nice to see Jim again. I'm also pleased to announce he is visibly rotting
from the inside based on his teeth. So that's cool. And James Inhoff is describing himself
as the proletariat, weird world, weird world, this movie creates the US Senator is the proletariat
and scientists are the elites. Yep. Yep.
Yep. Makes sense. Yep. Totally checks. But his point is that Leonardo DiCaprio also talks
about climate change, but he has been on a private jet and a big boat. So there, we get
a cut from the Meredith Vieira show, which appears to be a somehow less likable
view.
And one of the hosts says, you can't promote weight loss and eat a cheeseburger.
And I just wrote my notes, yes, yes, you can.
Cheeseburgers are keto friendly.
You could just eat the burger.
It's very, very all-or-nothing thinking.
And I love this just this idea that if there's a human being
on the planet who uses carbon,
but then says that we don't like our dependence on carbon,
that they are hypocrites,
as if they have any individual control
over living in a carbon economy.
Right.
So they're trying to change that.
Like you get that, right?
They don't want it to be this way.
But until it's no longer this way, they have to consume carbon.
Right.
Like you can't fly to work on the Paris Climate Accord via electric plane because they don't
exist yet.
Yeah, they seem to make the point in this section that if the Scareclob meant it,
they would have paddled their way to the Paris climate accord and a Stammett.
I know.
I love the Scareclob guy is literally like, sometimes you got to fly, dude.
Like, sorry.
Like, like, we're buying our carbon credits.
What do you want?
Sometimes you got to fly.
Yeah.
I mean, Decaprio wants higher taxes on rich people like himself, but then he goes and
makes more money.
Hypocrite.
No, that's stupid.
Obviously not.
We also meet two more of our experts in this section.
John Coleman, founder of the weather channel and CGI aged Alfred Newman on the side of
a milk carton.
And also Brian Sussman, a former weather man who doesn't think climate change is real.
Apparently his brain got irradiated by all that green screen.
How did you keep straight all of the old white men in this movie?
They all blended together to me.
I did not.
It's just a series of talking head interviews with old crusty white men covered in dandruff.
Like that was the weirdest part.
And just blends together.
And then it's just interspersed with cuts of like charismatic, interesting people,
speaking truth to power.
Yep.
Like that's all it is.
It's old white men who are like literally, like you said, rotting from the insolent. And like interesting smart people.
And then they're like, look at the interesting smart people.
They suck.
That's all it is.
And next up, we have Ginger Vitus to make fun of Angelina Jolie.
Yes, the disease Ginger Vitus.
And Kevin jumps in here with a great prover that they don't really believe it.
He goes, you know who took real action?
Noah, when he built the ark, you know, in the Bible.
That true story?
Yep, that's the guy who meant it.
Yeah, he brings up when God told Noah
that the flood was eminent,
and I was like, interesting.
He was a highly respected flood in the field of floods.
Evident flood.
Emeritus.
Yeah.
You know, he read that straight off the promter.
Sure.
There's no way they had imminent.
No, you care all day.
Yeah, they wrote imminent.
Yep.
Yeah.
So now we're going to cut over to Bill Nye, who if you'll remember from the first movie
was criticized for wearing a lab coat, but this is modern losing his shit, Bill Nye, who I'm a big fan of.
I just want to say.
Yeah, they actually showed clips. I don't think it was this early in the movie,
but they showed clips from Bill Nye saves the world.
And there was a small part of me because I was on that show.
I was a correspondent on that show.
So there's a small part of me that was like, am I going to be in climate flip?
It's so cool. But no, I won't. on to some of that show. So there's a small part of me that was like, oh, am I gonna be in climate? I'm gonna be in climate.
I'm gonna be in climate.
I'm gonna be in climate.
But no, I won't.
We gotta get those residuals.
Gotta get those residuals.
Yeah.
We can pay value of the $5.
Thank you.
I actually do still get residuals from a,
I feel my same.
I feel my same.
I feel my, okay.
That's pretty cool.
This is also where we meet my favorite expert of the movie, Dr. Richard Linson.
Oh.
He's an atmospheric physicist.
So stupid.
All of his old colleagues at MIT got together to tell them what an asshole he is.
But you know, they love writing MIT, like really big in the chiroin every time he's on
the screen.
Banned from the campus of MIT
but that part's really small it's like the it's like the oj simpson book right if i did it
i did it okay is this the guy who said that carbon dioxide is the building block of all life
okay it's carbon he means carbon and that's fucking incredible i mean oxygen is Oxide is the building block of all life. Yes it is. Okay.
It's carbon.
I think.
He means carbon and that's fucking incredible.
And I mean oxygen is one of them too.
It's one of the big elements.
I don't think carbon dioxide makes up everything.
But he's like carbon dioxide, building block of all,
you want to murder all the trees?
They breathe it.
I'm so over that argument.
It's so infuriating. It's like when people talk about how we shouldn't
like eat chemicals. Yep. You know, and you're just like, God, you need to go back to seventh grade
and retake intro to biology. Eps. Would the trees be all like happy and fat right now if that's how it works?
Oh, it hurts my brain. We need some more morbidly obese trees.
Yeah.
So now Ksorps is going to hop back on and he's going to tell us about the, in his words,
so called scientific body, the IPCC.
Right.
That's their name.
Is that so cool?
Is that up for dispute?
The name?
That's the name.
We're air quote, the international panel on, no, just say it regular.
That's the word.
And so the idea here, or at least the argument here is that the IPCC is actually like this
cabal that's trying to take over global government.
Yep.
Sun King.
Yep.
Sun King.
They go to Ross McKitrick, a professor of economics at the University of Gwell.
Sorry.
Professor of what?
Economics.
Okay.
Not climate science.
University of Gwell.
Is that pretty sure he just made that up on the spot?
They were like, where do you teach him?
He was like, Gwell.
He just coughed and then wrote that down.
He's like, oh, yeah.
Too late. It's on the title card.
Their mascot is the Griff, by the way. That's for real. The growth
Griff. Yep. No, serious. But the point that he's making is if you put 400 economists
in a room and give them the same data, they all have different answers.
But if you put all climatologists in a room with the same data, they would all agree.
And that is bad for the climatologists.
It shows the economists don't have an agenda because they're all just guessing.
Right.
So he thinks that this, oh, there's so much on pack here. It's so painful.
Like, we don't have time to talk about the depths of how the scientific method works on
the show, but I think that one thing that's so easy to point to is that we know that reality
exists, right?
Reality is a thing.
And then what scientists do is they model reality.
And we can never get it perfect.
Our models are never perfect, but they're relatively close.
And different fields of science are better because they're able to collect data that's a little bit cleaner.
They're better modeling reality.
So like my field psychology is, which is a social science, we have a harder time modeling reality. So like my field psychology is, which is a social science, we have a harder time modeling reality. So we have to be a lot stricter with our statistical analyses,
because there's so much variability among people. Whereas, let's say, physics or math can
model reality in a much kind of cleaner way.
Or lie.
Oh, yeah, right. So economics is a very, it's like psychology in a way.
It's very loaded.
And that's where you do see a lot of agendas in the room.
And these models are models that are based
on a lot of variability.
And I'm not saying that climate models don't vary,
but the data are the data.
And it's not like we've, just because we've only been
collecting data for the past few hundred years,
like as human beings on Earth, it doesn't mean that we don't have sources of data from ice cores and tree rings,
you know, like paleontological sources of data that we can put into our models.
So basically the argument this guy is making is when you put a bunch of climatologists in a room and they all say the same thing,
it's because they're making a pretty damn good model.
You put 400 economists at a room and they all have different answers.
It's because their model's not very strong,
so they have to interpret it in wildly different ways.
He's making our fucking argument.
Sounds like you're saying climate science is a religion.
That's what I'm saying.
That's what he's saying because he doesn't understand science,
but he really gets religion. That's what he's saying because he doesn't understand science, but he really gets religion.
That's what that is.
Oh, so now it's time for them to debunk some individual claims of climate scientists
and people who believe in climate change starting with whether or not 2019 was the hottest
year ever.
Right. was the hottest year ever. And, hi, idiots, it was the second hottest year ever.
That's the argument.
This is the thing, so I kind of dug into this a little
because this is a common argument
that you hear from climate deniers.
The 1930s were way hotter than 2015, 2016, 2017, 2018, 2019.
You wanna know where this argument comes from?
I don't really, but I guess.
I guess.
American data only.
Woo!
Because it sounds like an unbiased research institution.
Yeah, because if you're one of these old white men in this movie, America's the only thing
that fucking matters to you apparently.
That's a mate.
In their title, they think data has a nationality.
That's phenomenal.
Right.
So here's the thing.
1934 was the hottest year on record in the USA, historically.
Actually 2012 became the hottest year, and then we've seen some hot years since then.
But 1934 was the hottest year on record only in the USA,
but the USA only makes up 2% of the globe.
Wait, that's where they got that from?
Yeah, the hottest years on record globally
have all been within this decade, this and the past decade.
But they're only looking at American data.
Okay, so, like that's not okay.
So, US warming is a hoax. Okay, so like that's not okay. So US warming is a hoax.
No, but even still it's not the hot even 1934 is still not the hottest year.
It's like the second hottest year and it's a random blip because the dust bowl was happening.
Like there was all this anthropogenic change
that caused the climate to spike locally.
That caused the climate to spike locally.
Wow. Yeah, it's amazing.
That's an upsetting backstory to that whole thing.
Okay, we're getting more about Dr. Richard Linsen here, right?
He's the guy who's presenting this.
Yeah, I just want to add a few more details about him.
He had lined the Koch Brothers Science Conference
from 1991, pro fossil fuel industry conference.
Yeah, you guys heard him say science in quotes again, right?
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Linson also had his work funded by the Kato Institute
and Peabody Energy, the coal company that Eli mentioned earlier.
He compared climate science to how we used
to think eugenics was great. And then we're going to figure out that it's not. It's like
Galileo. And he collects oriental rugs. I also learned that. That was weird. Was that
like he does wiki pdf? It was literally at the bottom of his wiki pdf. Okay. I was
what? Like did he add that? Like? That's his I feel like he added that
must have added that he's like
I'll
worldly
tell them about my collection
of plush racistly named
rugs.
Now that they took away my
sugar babies original boxes,
I only have my
rugs from the
audience.
So what do you think about Linson?
In 2004, he said he'd take bets on the global average temperature being actually lower
by 2024.
He thinks it's like a 50-50 on warmer versus colder and he would take bets.
Scientists, James Annen tried to take that bet with him, but Linson said he was misquoted and he wanted like 50 to one odds to take the bet which
You're lying
By definition if that's the odds you need you're a liar right because if it's a 50 50 in your mom
That's a I would say that I won to one
So I would say what's that a one to one? Yeah, that's one to one.
I'm pretty sure that's a coin flip.
Yeah.
And we meet a couple other experts in this section.
None of them say anything particularly important.
But but the thing I kept thinking to myself is I would be so much more convinced by any
of these guys.
If they didn't all look so much like they were melting, right?
Just everyone looks more like they're melting than the last.
It's a real, a real bummer.
We also get that guy who fucking loves carbon dioxide.
He's got the button.
Yeah.
He's got the button.
He's yelling about how it's not political.
The environmentalism is racist.
It's not pollution carbon dioxide.
It's great.
You guys are mean.
I love that when they say like it's not pollution because, because they're just appealing to these sort of base instincts
that people have,
where when they're like, how can carbon dioxide be pollution?
Lance, breathe it.
And it's like, do you know,
it's back to the chemical argument, right?
Like, do you know what pollution means?
Just because it's not like gray and sweaty.
Right.
Just because carbon dioxide isn't also plastic.
Doesn't mean it's not pollution.
We breathe oxygen.
If you fire oxygen into our face like a hundred miles an hour, it'll poison you.
I'm sure.
It's just amazing.
Like they just gloss over the entire greenhouse gas effect. They don't deconstruct
any of the actual science. They just have people going, no, and then they like drop the
mic. That's it. That's the movie. All right. So let's all keep in mind that elements and
compounds matter, all the elements and compounds matter. That's a good woke message and on that note
We're gonna take quick break while I call my bookie to make a bet about something and then we'll be back with more
Kara being a very obvious chill for big data
Good evening and welcome to Crossfire. I'm Tom Huckle. Tonight
Climate Change hoax or hot button issue Welcome to Crossfire. I'm Tom Huckle. Tonight, climate change.
Hokes or hot button issue.
And joining me is climate change skeptic Ron Brown.
But for having me, Tom.
Great, thanks for being here.
And we also have honest science communicator,
Cara Santa Maria.
So tell us Cara, what do you mean by honest science communicator?
Well, Tom, that's my thing.
I do science communication,
but without all the nice talk to make it palatable.
All right.
Interested to see how that works out.
This show is a bad idea,
and you should feel ashamed.
Okay, that's probably valid.
So, Ron, you tell us that climate change
is a hoax made up by liberals to gain political control.
That's right Tom, look,
nobody knows whether or not CO2 is a factor in climate warming,
but what we do know is that this guy is paid off by oil companies.
Sorry, what?
I don't know who he is or what he is, but he's all full of oil money.
I am not. Really? I'm not. Let me see your wallet.
No, no. give it to me
Please please
See look right here a check in his wallet from big oil for quote being a sell-out piece of shit
Weird that they title it that way, but I told you I punched me in my penis. Yeah, so what do you have to save for yourself?
Mm-hmm. I felt it with my knuckles and it was tiny.
Oh, okay.
All right, I'm gonna go to the green room and stuff all the cliff bars in my purse.
We go to here?
Uh, yes, I guess.
Not small.
Yes, it is.
And we're back. And as if I can't hear the thermometer, la, la, la, was stupid enough as an argument.
Now we're going to debunk the existence of extreme weather.
So Kara, any thoughts on this or is your entire state on fire again?
I can't hear you through the action, the air.
I don't know what you're talking about.
Well, the title card said facts on this part.
So I'm told it's facts.
Yeah, the title card here is facts, extreme weather.
And basically, they just bring out a bunch of pseudo scientists
to be like, the weather is not extreme.
Talk to me when a tornado can skateboard.
Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.
Yeah, they even show us like a congressional hearing where a scientist is getting grilled by some Republican Senator being like, are there more hurricanes?
Yesterday, today, are there more hurricanes?
Is there a hurricane in this room right now?
No, Gavill, that's it.
So stupid.
So stupid. I just wanted Chris Farley to run in yo soy el
ninj. Break it the meeting. No. So with that debunked, right? Like what do we even do
with that? Just like move on. Yeah, it's done. So with that debunked, we're going to talk
about whether the sea level is rising, which they'll introduce with a slide, Trumpianly titled, Facts Sea Level Rise.
Oh, God.
With a sharpie showing a lower smile.
Yeah.
And superimposed on top of the rising sea level.
You just drew a black line under.
I can see the sea above it.
What do you, okay?
You would think that their title cards would reflect their argument. Like would say facts. The sea level is not right. I think or facts. No
extreme. You think a lot of things, Carrie. I would. I would. Yeah. But basically they're saying here
like there's no way the sea levels rising. We'd have somebody actually says this. We'd have to invent new laws of physics
for the ocean to rise.
No, what?
Fucking gravity goes down idiots.
Obviously, how would that even happen?
I just don't understand how they can like look at maps
and like look at readings that show,
like without a shadow of a doubt
that the sea level is rising.
Like go to low lying countries and see
where the shoreline is, measurably,
and then go like nope, not happening.
Nope, your house is underwater,
but that was just, that's an anomaly.
You shouldn't have built your house in the underwater.
It was weird that you decided to build it there.
What I love about this section is they get their experts mixed up with their other experts
because the first guy goes, it's physically impossible.
We need to invent new laws of physics.
And then the next guy goes, I mean, it's been 6,000 years and it's only been a few feet,
right?
I mean, what are we gonna do?
There's so many times.
So Cara's giving us like actual answers about these things, but so many times they claim
something and I'd be like, I don't really, like, I know that's wrong, but I don't know exactly
how it's wrong.
So I do like the most casual, possible Google of the question.
And Google would be like, yeah, man, it's fucking rising.
What are you talking about?
Yeah, right here.
So clear. No, a global sea level has been rising over the past century and the rate has increased in recent decades in
2014 it was 2.6 inches above the 93 average and the highest annual average in the satellite record
sea level continues to rise at about one eighth of an inch per year
Okay, so
I guess we invented new laws of physics. Yeah, that's cool.
That's exciting.
So now we get a slide that says, facts, polar bears and polar caps.
And honestly, if you had asked me if this segment of the movie was going to debunk the
existence of both, I would have given you even money.
Well, true, because do you think any of these climate deniers are also flat earthers?
Because if they are, then it's an ice wall, not a polar cap.
Right?
Flat earthers don't believe in the North and South poles, do they?
Oh, man, I want one who's both, because that Venn diagram has to cross over, probably
a bunch.
Yeah, for sure. man I want one who's both, because that Venn diagram has to cross over, probably a bunch. Yeah.
Yeah, for sure.
Like climate denial, flat earth, vaccine denial,
and maybe like, yeah, coronavirus hoaxers.
I bet you there's a lot of people who fall into those,
not a lot, but like interesting people.
We got to get that Venn diagram fighting with itself.
In the history of the...
I want to see that move.
I was just saying, the very center of that Venn diagram
is Marsha show be reason.
Just the same guests.
And one point I want to touch on about this polar bear section.
So their point is polar bears are fucking fine.
All right.
But one of the guys is like, oh, yeah, no, when the polar ice caps melt, it's not bad
for the polar bears.
They just go on land and eat gofers.
Yeah, what was he talking about?
And then they turn into regular bears.
He said, yes, he said that.
He said they eat gofers and then they probably turn it to like brown bears.
I don't know.
Wait, what was his expertise?
Oh, colors.
Who the fuck?
Now, this is one of their myriad fucking physics majors from wealth universities
off campus. Sad like, I don't think this guy was a biologist. I don't know why I felt
the need to reference this standup multiple times in the last week, which I shouldn't
do because he got me to, but it reminds me of that time in the Louis CK standup where
he's talking about his friend who like
Needs to go all night. And so he's like, oh if I run out of cum, I'll just like drink milk drink some milk
Yeah
Your body can be like, oh, yeah, that's perfect just to run that right through it
It's like where are you getting your science?
Or you can't just make it up on the spot because it seems reasonable to you. Like, like a grizzly bear is not just a polar bear that like ran out of food.
That's your code.
Eight of brown thing and turned brown.
Not just a polar bear that can't catch a cab and Manhattan.
There's a whole thing.
So what color does he think seals are?
I want to think about it.
So do you guys want to know why this is a complicated issue and why climate denialists
love to jump on the bandwagon with the polar bear effect?
Damn right.
Okay.
I'm not.
Okay.
So polar bears are in danger of extinction.
We know this.
This is true.
The confusion comes in because there are a 19 different recognized subpopulations and
the numbers of specific polar bear subpopulations are a little bit hard to track.
We know that there are probably about 28 to 25,000 polar bears in existence, and we know
that most of the 19 subpopulations are in decline or are stable. Actually, one subpop is increasing. And some
of them we don't we don't know what's going on because we don't have a Pennsylvania.
It's weird. It's weird. It's changing fast. But the main takeaway here that they love
to point to is that they like to say, look, their numbers are increasing. Their numbers
are increasing. Now, this is a very kind of classic Trumpian argument,
like when he says, look, unemployment is going down
because it tanked first.
That's what he's talking about.
It's a great thing.
So in 1973, there was the international agreement
on the conservation of polar bears, which restricted
and banned hunting with certain polar bears.
And so of course, their numbers started to bounce back after that.
And they love to just look at that data
and go, their numbers are going up,
climate change can't be real.
And it's like, yeah, when people stopped killing them,
less of them were dead after that.
But on average when you take a bigger look they are heavily threatened and climate changes very much one of the reasons that they are threatened. Yeah. Also polar bears wasn't the end of our argument.
It wasn't our end game. No. So now Kevin's going to hop back the screen. He's gonna say, yeah, you know, the climate elites,
they tell you there's a crisis.
But as you can see, we have literally
fives of unrelated scientists who say they're wrong.
Well, five, one, they told us to shut up
and stop asking questions, which if you think about it,
is a lot like 1984.
I can't, I can't. This is this is the part where
like flames started coming out of my ears. Yes. Now the movie paid for by the oil lobby
to lie about the numbers on a thermostat is going to tell us about how the other side
is just like the villains in George Orwell's fiction. Listen, there's 19 subpopulations of polar bears
19, 19 what? 84. And we're going to use this metaphor for every scene in the rest of the
movie.
The rest of the movie is just clips from 1984 superimposed on them claiming that basically
the global cabal that wants to have a new world order economy is big brother.
Like this is the argument, right? And so people who literally thought that 2 plus 2 equals 4 need
to now just sit down and shut up and understand that when AOC and basically every legitimate progressive world
leader hurts, that climate change is a real problem.
Really what they're saying is two plus two equals five
and suck it up and believe it.
Yeah, and there's two things I want to touch on here.
The first is, this is where we get the first appearance
of my favorite person in the movie.
Yes, even more than Lord Humboldton,
Cerfdom Mockton, Dr. Bill Gray. Wait, is this Dan Drift guy? No, this is chocolate on the
side of his mouth guy. Oh, it's definitely also Dan Drift guy. No, but but Dan Drift guy,
and you remember in the fleece of zippy, he's got a lot of Dan Drift. No, this guy with the cloud.
No, this is, that's not him. No, this guy's amazing with the chocolate on the side of his mouth.
It's like they caught him on the way out of lunch.
Absolutely.
And they were like, hey, can we talk to you for 30 seconds?
And then they just took every second of that 30 second interview and put it in the movie.
Absolutely.
And he has chocolate, distractingly on the side of his mouth.
I am a father of a five-month-old.
And my son watched this movie with me and was like,
dude, that guy needs to clean that shelf.
It's thanks.
No, it's nice.
Excuse me.
I'm going to put these carrots back in my hair.
But that guy's embarrassing himself.
It's like you all remember being in elementary or middle school and having
a teacher who had like the the shit that would just collect. Yeah, and you and it's all
you could focus on like it's all you could for like an hour. You could leave class and
go what did you learn today? And you'd be like, Oh, Spittle. Oh, we'd be watching it and
we'd have like overunders on like at what minute during the class it would fly off and
it would go nuts and the teacher wouldn't know what had happened.
You don't spill a flat out. That's this guy. Some of us didn't want to bet.
But we're going to run through a few 1984-esque scenarios here. My favorite of which is
Ted Cruz Trinon asked the climate expert the hard questions.
Trying to ask the climate expert the hard questions. So also one of my favorite parts of the movie.
Yes, Ted Cruz is trying to like grill a scientist again in a Senate hearing.
And he's like, okay, well, if two plus two was found to be five by math, would you admit
it?
And the guy's literally is like two plus two is four. And he's like, no, but if it was five, wouldn't
you come clean about that? And he's like, I'm going to stop you right there. You're stupid.
Yeah. He plus two is four. Motherfucker. He literally repeats. It's amazing.
Yeah. He repeats the question. And then the guy repeats his like perfect answer. Like
97% of scientists agree climate change is real. So no.
He might as well be like Ted, I know that you're asking me if I would change my mind in
the face of science so that when I am done talking, you can lie about whether the science
is different. So I'm not going to let you do that, Ted. You understand that, right?
And he's like, home, oh, says what? What? No, dad did it. No. Yeah, it's like when
people, it's, do you remember that interview with Fauci? I can't remember the journalist
that was interviewing him. And he was really trying to get him to say some things where he's
like, how, but what's it like when Trump, you know, disagrees with you and what's it like?
And finally, he's like, dude, what do you want me to say? Like, come on, don't make me
lose my job. But just to be clear, one more time about Ted Cruz here, his level of misunderstanding of,
well, everything, but big brother especially is amazing because the argument is trying
to make his like, oh, well, science can change.
You can find something new and now you have to change your opinion.
But like his example was if the opriory fabric of the universe changed and two plus two equaled five and I
proved it. It's imposter. Would you believe me? Unreal. He's a senator.
And it's like pretty much a lot of other shit would be upside down if you can prove that
two puts like, this is the least of our worries. If that's what's going on out there.
Oh, and there's one other thing in this section. They explain the problem that they have with the 97% number is that they didn't name
all of the scientists in the 97% who are graven.
They were literally like 97% of qualified scientists, 97% of expert scientists,
like all of the descriptors that have ever been used,
which basically are emphasizing the people
who are not pseudoscientists,
like legitimate scientists,
and they're like, but what do you mean by legitimate?
And not you.
Right.
So now we're gonna talk about where their scientists
are being intimidated and threatened
just like in 1984. You remember how in 1984 the people who disagreed with Big Brother were
allowed to make millions of dollars and put out their own bullshit documentaries?
Yeah, it's like that. Oh, it's so like, it's almost like these people saw Trump be so successful at the art of the deal.
Like they saw him go, I know what I'm going to do.
Anytime anybody levies an argument against me, that's legitimate.
I'm just going to go, I know you are, but what am I?
And they were like, holy shit, it works for the president.
We can all do it now with impunity.
This works on 38% of the country, guys.
We have been working too hard.
Yeah.
We were doing the rubber glue thing.
Yeah, that's good.
That's awesome.
That's what this whole fucking movie is.
Is there like, oh, it's just like in 1984.
And we're like, you know, you're the bad guy in 1984, right?
Like, you mixed it up a little bit.
This is also where they bring up that in Canada,
they will throw you in jail
for denying climate change.
Which is like, what?
No, this guy was just,
he just was served a summons for like appearing
and he got a lawsuit.
Yeah, that's not the same thing as being thrown in jail.
Whatever, I wish he got thrown in jail.
Yeah, this is a civil suit, right?
Like, yeah.
Yeah. That's so silly. Whatever, I wish he got thrown in jail. Yeah, this is a civil suit, right? Like,
So silly.
But Sorbo is making this point by standing behind
the bars of some kind of jail that he found.
Oh yeah.
He's like, nobody actually went to jail,
so I'm gonna make you think they did,
because I'm an alcatraz.
He's a visual aid for us to get jail as a concept, but where the fuck is this beach
that also has an abandoned medieval jail in it?
I just told you it's Alcatraz.
Alcatraz.
With Tron.
I answered.
Got Sorpo's school trip all taken care of.
Oh yeah.
Wouldn't that be great though, actually, if it was just like his
teenage kid school trip and we see them loading onto a bus in the background. He's like
eating a twinkie and like a ham sandwich. Yeah. Milk, a milk box. Oh, he stabbed in the milk bag. Capri Sun gets in his
eye. Every time you go to sit next to the teacher on the bus, cool kid doesn't want to sit
with me. Yeah, the part of this section, you probably work sitting with the cool kids.
Carol, you're probably up front in the front doing something front, front was not cool kids.
Back was cool. No, back is everyone knows back is stoners.
Yeah, those are cool kids. See why what's wrong with you? No, because they did drugs and
drugs aren't cool. Wow. So much you went to a weird school. No, he didn't. He just
isn't. It's great. This is my own lunch table all to myself. What
happened? I was the coolest kid in school. I was the treasurer of the drama club.
I know what was cool.
And not a real ex in the kid.
Listen, I had a lot of ex a lot.
But just in case you weren't already playing the world's smallest violin for these climate
change skeptics, we're going to talk about the tragedy of Dr. Willie soon and the time
that Greenpeace used FOIA to show how much oil money he was taking
Willie soon literally got paid 1.2 million dollars between 2005 and 2015 from the fossil fuel industry without disclosing it got all the way caught
They're interviewing him. He's like, yeah, his newspaper caught me.
I cried a little bit, cried.
I got a lot.
Okay, I had a full breakdown.
It was, and that's the whole scene.
Yeah, he doesn't explain himself.
It was very hard for me to get caught taking money from big oil.
And I was like, me too, baby, me too.
Yeah, like what's the argument here?
Cut is the argument.
Yeah, point made, unsure what it was.
But if that wasn't scary enough, now we get a title card that says jailing skeptics,
which actually means random clips of people not in power saying they should go to jail out of context.
Right. And to be clear here, let's just reinforce if we haven't done so already that when they use
the word skeptic, they're using it wrong. Yes. They are climate deniers. Yeah. Speaking of
using skeptic wrong, I believe they present Robert F. Kennedy Jr. as being
pro science here.
Hey, Jesus.
I know that was a bad guy to them in this movie.
But isn't he on their side on vaccine stuff?
He sure the fuck is.
Oh, right, but he's ultra liberal.
So he, yeah, he's pro climate change.
He's pro climate change.
That's a weird thing.
Yeah.
He likes killing babies and changing climates.
Yeah, kill those babies and the polar bears.
Yeah, but we get to hear RFK Jr. talk a little bit and I love it's so delightful that the
Kennedy accent, but going through his like, laryngectomy robot device voice at the same time
from then I spoke, oh my God.
But he also sounds kind of crazy.
Yeah.
Like, I see why they use the clip to be honest
because it does sound crazy.
That's why they led with him saying like,
these people should all go to jail.
But what he's really saying is that the people
who can be proved culpable of damaging the climate
beyond repair or of conspiring to continue to damage the climate,
so that the next generation grows up ill,
those people should be held responsible.
They should go to jail.
Of course.
But they should go to jail.
They could have played it with the fact that people,
they're like, no, they think people
who don't believe in climate change should go to jail.
And it's like, no people, they're like, no, they think people who don't believe in climate change should go to jail.
And it's like, no, what they're saying is that oil industry executives who knowingly,
who do believe in climate change and knowingly make these decisions should go to jail the same way
that the cigarette executives who we have on record being like, oh, these dumb fox,
they're just going to keep smoking and then they're all going to die. Like, yeah, they should have gone to jail too.
Yeah. And they bring up the fact that certain states have used reco-charges to like,
make sure that there is actual justice for the Sends CEOs, but they act like, yeah, you know,
if a Chinese company dumps a bunch of sulfates into a river in Alabama, they're probably going
to come for your uncle Frank who don't think it's getting much hotter
around these parts next.
Exactly.
It's so infuriating.
Yeah.
Relax.
Your uncle Frank's not the consigliary for that Japanese oil, whatever.
No.
That's a great word you just used.
Thank you.
Yeah.
And now we're going to tackle.
We go.
Number two. And now we're going to tackle. We go. Number two.
And now we're going to tackle religion because these motherfuckers wanted to make sure they made
it onto God awful movies.
Right.
Yeah.
I didn't notice that.
There was like, there were the little nuggets until here, but you can't, it's so inextricably
linked when you're talking about these like ultra right wing think tanks that they can't, it's so inextricably linked when you're talking about these like ultra right wing
think tanks that they can't not also be evangelical.
So like, and really, what does this all come down to?
Well, it all comes down to political power and control,
but also this like weird manipulative propaganda
of like Jesus wants the white people to say and also God wouldn't
let the earth go to shit because the flood, I don't understand it.
It's an eminent flood.
Because the eminent flood.
Right.
And the thing that they hit here is that global warming is a religion,
right? It's a new religion dedicated to the planet earth and, and, but they don't believe it.
Yeah, but they don't believe in separation of church and state. And I wrote in my notes,
really Kevin, or you a big fan of separation of church and state because I've seen your movies, buddy.
Right.
And it's like, okay, so they're claiming
that this is some sort of new religion.
But what is interesting is that every religion
other than Judeo-Christian faiths have always been
supportive and reverent of the climate.
Like this is human spirituality from the beginning, right?
From like indigenous early hunter gatherer groups,
the religious preferences and the spiritual development
happened as an intricate connection to the planet.
And only Judeo-Christian faiths and sects
that became kind of interlinked with capitalism and interlinked with
these governmental systems. These are the religions that started to pull away from the climate.
And even not all of them, there are some really amazing Christian sects out there and Jewish sects
out there that are very reverent of the earth and think all of these guys are assholes because they are.
Right.
I know, I know actually a lot of very religious people who are like, yes, climate change
is real and I have a religious obligation to be good to mother earth.
But beyond that, like these, the argument that they're making that this is some sort of
new religion and that those of us who care about the environment can't look at science and
only look at it religiously is batshit for so many reasons.
A, it's older than your religion.
So yes.
But B, like, no, the scientists are on this side of the argument.
Yeah.
The religious people who are so religious that they're not willing to accept the scientific truth
are on your side of the argument.
Right. Let's be clear. The reason why Mike Pompeo doesn't care about climate change is because
he believes sword mouth Jesus and his army of 3,544 dead souls will defeat the woman-faced
bare-breasted lion-chested scorpion locusts and the winged Daniel Eagle dragon trial print
Antichrist in the final battle while he's still alive, right?
So so like okay, who is the bare chested bare breasted Antichrist? Is it AOC or Greta
Tunberg? Oh, I think it's a I think it's a Voltron opposed to yeah, spoiler
multiple copies of those two different sizes and speaking of children now
we're going to talk about the indoctrination of kids in our schools by
teaching them science
Right, and oh, and this is like the first lady that we get to see
What was her name back deltast nailed it nailed it
This also where we get the title card that says one plus one equals global warming
Like it was a riddle and I was like
So to you're saying global warlings to
So global warming squared is five. I don't understand
what it's like. He's trying to tell me big brother. I forget this woman's name. She wrote a book called
Training for Treason, which I super duper want to read, but it's all about how the schools are
brainwashing your kids with liberal values. And one of the things she said is like, all the schools
teach you, you know more than your parents, your parents are ignoring your grandparents are ignorant.
I wrote my notes. I mean, statistically, your grandparents are pretty fucking stupid.
Exactly. I loved my grandma, but she got to do two letter boggle words. I mean, there's
a reason that was kind of her whole argument. Wasn't it like as she started to break it
down and get to the crux of the argument, she was like,
we're teaching kids not to believe their parents, but to believe evidence.
Like how horrible.
Basically, she's saying, we're creating a world in which we can maybe, you know, progress
past racism.
What a horrible world. What a shame. It's so clearly just angry parents who didn't understand the common core math that their
kid brought home and they got all angry about it.
And now they're trying to like climb its scientists, common core math.
But we all die if your stupid dad can't estimate two digit edition like you can because
you learned thing.
It's a big, whatever.
It's frustrating.
I have to admit, like it's frustrating
because I see it in my own family
where I have a father who's not really a climate denier,
but definitely a Trump supporter.
He's very religious, but he's also scientifically minded.
He has a degree in engineering and he has a good job
and he's very smart.
And so it's frustrating when I hear the kinds of arguments
that are definitely like fostered by watching Fox News.
But one of the things that I notice is a very common thing.
Like, for example, I think it was right after we did Allison's choice.
Yeah.
My dad and I were arguing via text
and he said something along the lines
because it was when they were, you know, Amy Krett and blah blah blah and I was like listen no offense
But I don't care about your take your take has nothing to do with my autonomy as a woman
I could give a shit what you think and he was like well
I mean I believe in a woman's right to choose just not to the end all be all like not to the full extent
I was like what are you talking about and he was like you know like late-term abortion and I was like that
That doesn't exist.
Like that's a Fox News talking point.
Blah, blah, blah.
So we're going on and on.
And he's like, what are you even talking about,
care, women get late term abortions all the time.
And I take a screenshot of like the CDC website.
Like I go there 10 seconds that shows the percentages
of first term, second term, and unfortunately,
the horrible decision that has to sometimes be made late in a third term, second term, and unfortunately, the horrible
decision that has to sometimes be made lay in a third term, which is like 0.001% or something
like that. And I send it to him. And he's like, I'm tired. I can't keep up with how fast
you're saying. And I was like, you can't keep up with my facts. Look, you did. And that's
really the issue, right? That she's presenting is that kids now have access
to more information.
They are able to educate themselves in a quicker way.
They can leave their bubbles more realistically
and they're armed with facts.
So when they come home to their parents
and they're like, remember how you taught me
that a dinosaur was a Jesus horse?
Like I learned something in school that, you know,
I'm pretty sure I believe, and their parents are like,
fuck what do I do? What do I do?
Yeah, we find all that.
It's like you got like an information super-highway.
Real fast, no, it's got new stuff.
Like a series of tubes.
Fuck you.
But yeah, according to this movie at least,
first you educate the kids, and then they vote for people
who say true things.
That's bad.
That is bad according to this movie.
Education and democracy,
both liberal conspiracies, that's correct.
Yeah, I'm so much better
when we could just brainwash everybody.
It's better.
Just indoctrination is so much better than education, right?
Okay, but yes, I agree if I'm in charge, but I just want to bring up one other amazing moment
in this little section. Well, too. First of all, we get to see Greta Tunberg improvising
the bell jar and be an all crazy and dark for a second. So that was fun.
I love her. She's the best. I
was kind of on this movie side about Greta Tonberg because oh no. Here's Greta's point. She's like,
wait, if climate change is real, why aren't you all freaking out about it? And they're like, oh,
well, um, you got to relax. And she's like, no, I'm not going to fucking relax. You all said,
the earth is going to end. And it's like, yeah, but we're saying that and grown up. You don't, don't worry about it, Greta. And she's like, I am worried about it. I'm not gonna fucking relax. You all said the earth is gonna end, and it's like, yeah, but we're saying that and grown up.
You don't, don't worry about it, Greta.
And she's like, I am worried about it.
I'm depressed and scared and terrified all the time.
And we're like, no, don't, don't, don't.
Yeah, but like, yeah.
Stop.
Greta, freaking me out with the Sylvia Plath.
Stop it with your honesty, Greta.
Like, this movie is the perfect example
of my own cognitive dissonance when it comes to global warming, right?
Which is like, global warming is real, but there's no need to get all angry about it, Greta, relax, okay?
And I'm over here, like, I totally identify with Greta, and that's probably because I personally am training to be an existential psychosamist.
And she's like, me, she incarnate.
I was going to say she's the final exam to become an existential psychotherapy. And I just
love her for it. You got to have a conversation with her and Maria Abramovich and come out
the same person you went in. There's your degree.
Okay. And just real quick, the one other thing I was talking about is they show us the commercial there's your degree.
Okay, and just real quick, the one other thing I was talking about is they show us the commercial where the teacher asks her class of British students.
If they could maybe help the planet in a tiny little way, like, you know, ride
bicycles or something like that.
And then she says, Oh, everybody raise your hand if you're willing to do that.
And everybody but two kids raised.
And we're there. everybody raise your hand if you're willing to do that and everybody but two kids raised and weird to their hands and then and then she pushes a button and those two children
explode and but not like not like a superimposed flame over top of them like a very expensive
wet realistic like brutally graphic explode like they're sitting on an ID. What?
What is the, I know there's context for this PSA.
What is the context for this?
I don't know, because I was like, that's fucked up.
Like even I was like, climate hustle too,
you make a good point.
I'm looking this up now.
I'm so proud of Great Britain
for airing that commercial,
that's where that was from.
Like, so good.
PSA where kids in class explode.
I think you just get dropped into a rank or cage.
I don't care.
No, this PSA about climate change was real.
It featured exploding children and airborne body parts.
And apparently Sony, I found an article
where Sony dropped out of the campaign
after the exploding kids.
What was the point though?
Oh, it was narrated by,
is it Jillian Anderson from the X-Files?
There you have it.
Yeah.
And it was, it was the,
Sony, the Violet Nature of the Video So Incent Sony UK
that the company dropped all support for the campaign.
Oh, and it was British.
It was British.
It nailed it.
It was Kio Sarah said it was a grave error of judgment,
disapproval condemned it by 10 to 10 harsh words for the campaign. So they really aired that.
They really aired that. Yeah. So all right points for climate. Yeah. Video has already been
unleashed into the digital wild where climate change skeptics can be found
Seathing and disapproval let this be a lesson for future climate change campaigns don't get too radical or you'll lose support
From both your supporters and the people who disagree with you are yeah, that really didn't help anything it only hurt
What a weird
What a weird thing
Wow, I know What a weird, what a weird thing. Wow.
Ugh, I know.
Okay, so, learning your lesson,
lesson learned exploding kids a little too far for a few people.
Yeah, because ultimately my question is,
what are they trying to say?
Are they trying to say like,
if you don't do your part,
this is where you're going to end up.
You'll die or that that's the future of the British school system, like big brother.
Oh right. That's making their point. Wouldn't it made more more sense if she like push the button
and then the sun came out of the sky or like a giant magnifying glass went over their heads and
then they were like burnt. Sure. See? We're already workshopping better things than people who made this BSA or like a sea level
rised only around their deaths and then they drowned.
Oh, drowning the children down.
That's a violent, like scary death.
It's horrible, but at least it directly connects to the fact that they want to be inactive
about climate change.
I don't understand why if they want to be inactive about climate change, their teacher
will murder them.
Like, that's a weird disconnect for me.
You all heard it here first.
Cara Santa Maria wants to drown children
who don't believe in climate change.
Great, now that's gonna be a fucking website.
Do it already, bud.
Already the words came out of your mouth
and it was spoken into reality.
I'm just over here loving how much money
you're paying to go daddy on
my. All right, well, that website's locked in. And just more generally, it sounds like the problem
is either the fossil fuel industry or possibly numbers. You decide. And while you're deciding,
we're going to take one more quick break break and then we'll be back to here
Why it's numbers in the Rico law define conclusion of climate hustle to
Hey hold still buddy. Hey Eli. What you doing there? And why are you putting a pinstripe suit on your baby?
Oh, hey Cara. Hey, so you remember that hilarious character? The kid did in the movie
this week, little aoc, not even slightly, larious. No, super upsetting. Yeah. So I got to thinking
what's little aoc without little Ted Cruz? So yeah, he's gonna harass the shit out of
little aoc. Your baby is? Oh, yeah. yeah. He's already, quote, tweeted her dishonestly, like, three dozen times, not to mention all
the times he likes to coily tweet to his dangerous right wing following that someone should get rid
of her to protect America.
That sounds like a terrible idea.
And don't worry, don't worry, Heath.
Our buddy Thomas Smith is dressing his babies up as Chuck Schumer and Nancy Pelosi. And those babies are strongly condemning my baby's behavior.
So.
Yeah, Eli, I don't think that's better.
Well, you know, that's politics, guys.
If you don't like it, vote.
Vote against your baby.
Yeah.
Yeah.
But good luck.
Me and Anna are strong supporters.
So.
Anna is okay with this.
Oh, yeah. pretty much any chance
to put the kid in a costume.
Okay, yeah, that tracks.
Eli, I don't know how to say this,
but I think you have access to too many babies.
Mm-hmm, you sound just like your lawyer.
I mean, less panicky, but yeah, yeah, a lot.
And we're back.
And this is where the climate scientists really ramp it up and challenge the movie.
Apparently climate change is going to fuck up the barley crop in the world. And I will not be able to get drunk and stop caring about climate change.
This is an interesting argument. I will, we'll be need to have some talking down.
This movie needed a trigger warning for he absolutely.
But this last third of the movie is dedicated to the bad ideas, climate change activists
have to fix climate change, starting with mandating solar and wind power.
Oh, right.
Yeah.
Cause this is back to that global cabal new world order, apparently.
Yeah.
Exactly. Oh right, yeah, because this is back to that global cabal new world order apparently. Yeah, exactly.
Solar mandated solar and wind and all of our rights are taken away. Exactly. And the arguments
they're going to use here are that windmills are ugly and the sun is not always there.
Okay. Okay. Did this movie literally claim that the sun is only shining 10 to 40% of the year?
Yep.
Yes, that is an exact fuck to even think.
Wait, and then don't they interview a climate denier who goes on to talk about how his
solar panels don't provide enough electricity, because the sun isn't always
there. Why do you have solar panels if you're a climate tonight? Why do you have solar panels
if you're in a movie talking about how solar panels don't work? I can't. It's so, it's
just my brain hurt so much. Also, a tiny note about that guy,
as they're interviewing,
he left his screen with all the windows in the background
of his interview.
It's so confusing.
It's so distracting.
Oh, yeah, he's a climate science denier,
and the window in his background
is very clearly showing a graph of the temperature
of the globe going up over
the last four years. He's clearly got that chart up. Yep. Also, I just want to add one more
thing, one more problem with wind power. Uh-huh. I don't know if you heard wind turbines kill birds.
Why did they show that like horrific video? So they show a video of a bird.
I think it was like a vulture or something,
flying into a wind turbine and die.
And it's a big bird.
So then it's like on the ground and they zoom in on it.
It's like, are they getting kicks out of this?
Like why did they stay on that dying bird for so long?
Yeah, for as much as they're trying to tug
at our heartstrings with that, they are citing
the YouTube video, which it's pulled from in the corner, which is called like massive bird
fail.
Kind of takes away the seriousness of the moment.
Yeah.
And we're also watching Tucker Carlson do this interview and he's got somehow it looks
like he's always refusing baby food.
That's his resting face.
Like he's really mad about the baby food that he's going to have to eat eventually.
He's going.
So now we're going to talk about bad idea number two, energy rationing.
And the example of this is that in the movie 1984, they turned to the lights off.
Also, also in New York City, they turned off the Empire State Building for a second.
So yeah, energy rationing.
So they realize that if we ration energy when it's necessary, it prevents us from just
not having any later, right?
They do not realize that.
They do not realize that. They do not realize that.
They do not realize that.
They do not realize that.
They do not realize that.
They do not realize that.
They do not realize that.
They do not realize that.
They do not realize that.
They do not realize that.
They do not realize that.
They do not realize that.
They do not realize that.
They do not realize that.
They do not realize that.
They do not realize that.
They do not realize that.
They do not realize that.
They do not realize that.
They do not realize that.
They do not realize that.
They do not realize that. They do not realize that. They do not realize that. They do not realize that. They do not realize that. they're like, they want us to just be like all the underdeveloped countries and they keep showing us like
sad footage of Africa because their point is you want to be Africa because that's Africa. Energy rationing is Africa. Yeah, because that's what's happening there. They're rationing. They're rationing
their energy in the face of her in Africa. Yeah, yeah. The IPCC is like, man, let's just not give the Africans any energy. What? And then as though they couldn't make a more dishonest argument about the suffering of people,
they're going to talk about the reason that the elderly die in their unheated homes in the winter,
is because environmentalism makes heat too expensive.
What?
Yeah.
The claim that like there was a tough winter in Europe recently and like an extra 7,000
people died of the cold because of that tough winter.
But they're claiming like they froze to death in their apartment watching Greta Tunberg
on their laptop instead of turning on their heat.
Right.
Like this has nothing to do with income inequality.
It has nothing to do with like a lot of economic policies that they support, like trickle-down
economics.
It has everything to do with tree huggers telling them not to change their thermostat by a
degree.
And to make the pun that they have telling us this tragic tale is Lord Hammer shams
walk bottom
A literal he is literally part of the feudal system
And he's like, don't you feel bad for all those people who stop to death in the winter
Because Greta Thunberg made them turn off their faith. He did.
Keep my ring.
Is your eye expanding? Do you need to shunt that out or something?
I say, where the big come?
Moith in my eyeballs.
Well, I tell people what the poor are up to.
Oh my God.
So now it's time for bad idea number three, planned recessions,
or as we call it in America,
electing Republicans.
Oh,
oh,
I mean,
apparently the recessions need to be unplanned
according to this movie.
They prefer that.
Well, what's amazing about, they show it
because I was like, what the fuck is this supposed to even be?
But they just show a clip of a person being like,
look, the economy can't always go up.
You can't have infinite economic growth.
That's not possible.
And they're like,
Yes, so you just want the economy to stop?
Yep.
Sometimes.
Sometimes.
Could we just have some stability for a while?
But the whole time they're trying to claim
that poor people are affected by it.
Like if we curtail the fossil fuel industry,
poor people are hit the most.
Like poor people are gonna lose billions
from their energy portfolios.
But there is people who own the oil companies
are just looking out for us.
Ah, fuck.
All right, now it's time for bad idea number four,
eliminate people because you know how climate change activists
are constantly suggesting genocide,
this movie's gonna refute that.
Talk about a straw man argument if there ever were one.
Okay, I've found this section compelling.
Ha ha ha ha ha.
Well, and the clip that you use is James Cameron talking to Arnold Schwarzenegger on the
DVD extras of the Terminator movie.
Wait, really?
That's what that was for.
That was an interview.
But the point they're making is that we're saying people should have less kids because
that would be better for the environment.
That would be right. And nobody is responsible. And nobody is claiming some sort of, you know, one child policy.
Basically, they show clips of Al Gore with Bill Gates saying like, women should have access to family planning.
Like women should have access to birth control and education for women should be improved
around the globe.
And that's going to dramatically affect the population rate.
But they're like, that's horrible.
You're a eugenicist.
So what?
Okay, again, I found this a little bit compelling.
I don't think, like, all right,
one child policy is a little strict,
but like, couldn't we do it like carbon credits where we trade them around or something like that?
All right, he is vying for his position
in a climate market solution.
The invisible hand.
He is terrible.
It's good.
The invisible hand on other people's penises.
A pressure the human race isn't going away.
We could have less birds and that would be good.
Right, but the good news is we know that there will be fewer child birds if women are empowered.
Like it's a problem that will solve itself without having to use these eugenic tools because
that's dangerous because as we know the problem with eugenics is who gets to decide, who
gets to have kids and who doesn't.
Richard Dawkins.
Exactly.
Like, this is not only what it's because it's feminism.
Yes, that's what I meant.
Save it, save it.
And also, by the way, there are more problems with eugenics than that.
Let me just be clear.
Just pull the bears.
Why do you hate science, Cara?
Why do you hate science?
I think the thing that's frustrating
is that a lot of people don't understand
this kind of reasoning.
They don't understand the history of these arguments, right?
Like early on, the actually the eugenic argument in America,
which is horribly dangerous,
started as something that most people who were in power
agreed with, and that's like rich white people.
But it's because it really came with this idea of like
modern science is gonna help us have healthier babies.
So this is a good thing we should all sign on for.
And then what happened?
Corrupt horrible people were like, yeah,
better babies in my view are white babies.
Better babies in my view are babies
that aren't socially deterrent, right? And they literally thought
with new scientific tools, we're going to be able to prevent individuals who have deviant behaviors,
because they thought that was genetic, from being able to make children, which is disgusting and
horrible. And then from there, we get Nazi Germany, like all sorts of horrible things happened after
that, but really the seat of this movement
was in the US.
A lot of people don't realize that.
And then it sort of spread to Europe.
And so eugenics is disgusting and it's horrible.
But now every conversation about population control is taken to that place immediately.
And it's like nobody can have an intelligent discussion about family planning.
When somebody is empowered to make the decision
for their own family, they often will choose
to have fewer mouths to feed.
Nobody is trying to come into their homes
and say you're not allowed to do this.
That's what happened in China and that was very dangerous.
Or you buy your credits or you sell your credits.
You have no credit.
It's a great system. No credit, it's no credit. Or you buy your credits or you sell your credits. You have no credit. It's a great system.
No credit, it's no credit.
And you know the total.
And you know the total.
But the thing is, if women are empowered
to become educated and to make decisions
that she feels are the best for her and her family,
she is very likely not going to have
a very large family with lots of children,
unless her religion calls for it
or she is spiritually called to do that.
And in many ways, that's okay
because it's counterbalanced by the number of women
who choose not to have several kids
but only replace or reduce,
meaning two or one or no children.
But that should be a choice.
And the cool thing is we have good economic evidence
that when women have that choice and they're empowered,
they won't have as many kids.
So we don't have to even think about resorting
to draconian processes that are dangerous and immoral.
So that's why I hate it when people try to equate
family planning with eugenics or genocide
because it's really fucking disingenuous
and it pisses me off and
It really is a sexist is them saying let's not give women the right to choose
Absolutely, and you get genetic genetic engineering gets attacked in that same way
It becomes a ridiculous conversation. That's not about what it's actually getting at
Yeah, and I mean, I think that speaks to the way that a lot of people see the world free, people who think about free market economics as being like a lack of regulation, which is insane.
And people who think about trickle-down economics as actually being a viable option, it's
too black and white for them.
Like they can't think about the fact that like with genetic engineering, regulation is
what makes it possible.
Because there are good things about it and bad potential outcomes.
So let's prevent the bad potential outcomes with fucking regulation. Okay, rant over, sorry.
Yeah, I read in Milton Friedman that a great way to fix the carbon problem. No, you didn't have to.
And they're completely ignoring that the best way to keep people from having more children is to
just have one. Let me tell you.
You can get the whole nation together and have them change a diaper that the baby immediately
poops into.
You get all that.
You get the family size down to one right there at the start.
Right.
Or like me, maybe less.
I learn by observing my friends and then I just have none.
Hey, you found the answer.
And you know, I, you're doing your thing, you get
to sell one of your things and you get a bonus.
That's right. Stop with the fucking credits. You got credit. You get to, I would say, and
you get to sell one if you're doing one. Thank you. Thank you, Cara. You're not here for
all the 271 other episodes where he's been proposing his child credits ideas. This is the first episode where it makes it to air.
All right.
And speaking of crazy ideas that this movie's gonna pretend
are honest representation of other people's opinions,
they also wanna shrink people.
Okay, this is amazing.
Oh yeah.
This is such a fantastic idea.
And by the way, I don't know if you guys have heard of this documentary, I saw it called
downsizing with Matt Damon.
It's possible.
The 2017 box office flop downsizing and Matthew Lowe, famous and why you crazy person.
Who's a dork?
You should look up stuff about him.
He's very well-intentioned.
He's adorable.
He's just also not a part of this dimension.
It's just a bad idea.
Is his science like, can we not shrink people?
What the biohacking stuff about like being less
consumptive, it's sci-fi.
It's interesting.
It's like one of those really interesting theoretical debates
that people have about string theory, for example.
Like it's complicated and it's interesting
and the outcomes of it could be really fascinating,
but it's not possible first to fall.
It's not possible.
And even if it were, it's not something
that anybody would enact.
Yeah, you wouldn't want everybody to be tiny little people.
It's what we can't.
Like it's-
Trink us? With a what? like with the shrink ray that you have with
the right.
I was picturing a ray, but whatever.
But the best part is Matthew Lau has made his entire career by, as Cara said, taking
exciting conversations and then holding a press conference and being like, hello, everybody.
Today, I have decided to create clones for using, for extra organs for when we need them.
And then he walks off the stage and takes no questions.
That is Matthew Lowe's entire scientific career.
And he is the perfect subject for climate awful too.
Should we not do that and make the clones for the thing?
He can't do any of it.
He can't do any of it.
We should definitely, if we can make like a non-sensit,
grow a liver, right?
No, we should definitely not do that.
What?
We should grow a liver in like a petri dish,
but we shouldn't clone you.
Okay.
Put you in like a neck chain
and just keep you in the basement
and harvest your organs.
That's not a good idea.
I'd picture a neck chain until just now,
but like, we'd livers. That's not a good idea. I had a picture of neck chain until just now, but like, we'd live us.
That's not okay.
Pretty sure when an organism is cloned, basically a new creature develops and that creature
has a brain and you know, all its parts.
Yeah.
We don't know how to clone non-sensit versions of ours.
Okay.
That's unfortunate.
Follow up question.
Ohio.
Follow up question. Ohio follow up question. Can we get webbed
fingers like a duck? I mean, people have a trait, like there are certain people who have
webbed fingers and toes genetically. And so I guess if you, if they only bred with other
people with webbed fingers and toes.
He's back on the eugenics again.
Kara, this is an amateur mistake.
Eventually you'd have a lot of webbing, but why would we want that?
We don't live in the water.
You could swim so fast, but we don't live in the water.
We're living the water soon.
Just make a lot of noise.
You come on this show, you make a few jokes, but then next week he's got a bunch of pictures
that duck people be forced to fuck for carbon credits.
Are you here to clean that up, Cara Santa Maria?
No, I have to clean that up.
And next week, I'm out.
Marsha's got to pick up the broken pieces you've left behind.
Okay, but the point is this movie is saying it's like a slippery slope from solar panels
to microscopic duck people and I don't understand that argument. Those are both good things.
Oh, so now they're going to come for the vegans.
Yes.
And again, we get a little clip of Matthew Lau here who doesn't just want everyone to stop eating meat.
He wants to make everyone allergic to meat.
And we actually do have a method for that. It's really interesting. It's called
trying out veganism and then become reluctant to dollar it. Not able to eat meat anymore.
Yeah, this is another pretty strong argument by the movie. The climate change, real people want us to,
you know, get healthy like Eli Bosnick.
So like,
this is strong argument by the movie.
Does Matthew Lowe also recommend something
like a nicotine patch for meat
because that's fantastic?
Yes.
Yeah.
Is that real?
Yeah, it's like the meat allergy.
I think it is real. Yeah. What. Yeah. Is that real? Yeah, it's like the the meat allergy. I think it is real. Yeah, what?
Yeah, so I could like just belt up like a meat all around my torso
Just have patches everywhere and get like super meat. No, no, no, no, so what this does is like if you
Wait, I'm so sorry Cara. I have to interrupt you. Heath
I want you to describe what you think the meat patch is before Kerry explains it.
This is a final. It's so okay. Okay, I will. I will. It's so you know, steak, right? I do.
And then like you have like a little like circle of glue around the edge. Sure. And you can like
patch it. You get and so you get the the meat so you can be like eating a steak and
getting like like you can eat like eat a ribeye and get a sirloin or like you can make
flays. You stick the steak to your skin and you eat it through your skin is what you're
actually like. Oh, you think the patch is made out of meat. You didn't show about skin books, whatever.
No, the idea here is that you're inducing an allergy so that when you eat meat, it makes
you ill.
We what?
Yeah, that's the big patch.
If I have a patch that induces an allergy, because some people have natural allergies
against certain proteins and meat and stuff, so if I have a patch that induces an allergy
that makes it so that I don't like the meat,
because I get sick every time I stop,
every time I eat meat, I'm eventually gonna train myself
to not eat meat.
And if I stop eating meat,
then I'm gonna be less consumptive for the environment.
Okay, I grew up that last part, but if I...
Or you could just not eat me.
If I got one of those, I would just like eat through the allergy.
Keith would be the outlier that destroys the meat patch business.
Oh, good.
More meat.
You know what you would be, you'd be like that episode.
Did you guys ever see that episode of Black Mirror where the surgeon had the thing that made
him feel what people were feeling like they were in pain.
So he was able to treat them because he could feel their symptoms.
Yeah, that's awesome.
But he got hooked on it,
and he was like,
I'm getting such a rush.
And he's just killing people, yeah.
Yeah, and then he was killing people
so he could feel the rush.
That's you, Heath.
That is, that's a good show, man.
That's Heath for a lot of reasons.
No, but here's the part where they're like,
oh, okay, maybe instead of the meat patch,
we could just eat bugs ridiculous.
Let's shit on like multiple cultures around the world.
And they show Nicole Kidman eating bugs and being like, yeah, they're not bad.
And they're like, what a cunt.
Is it the best?
Because this movie just went with the argument, yuck. Yuck. Blah, blah.
Yeah, that's it.
That's the segment.
The segment is Tucker Carlson being like, I don't want the bugs.
Yeah.
Wait, who wrote in their notes, Nicole Kidmit eating bugs was confusing for me, sexual.
That was me.
That was me.
That was me.
That was me.
That's right.
Are you telling me that wasn't confusing for you sexually? Oh, no, I was I knew exactly
Created sexual certainty in both me and the hair
I was alive for the first time
She's so classy and dignified she did it with Hashi, which is so chopsticks like
And now the movie is just gonna give us a title card called money. I'm guessing because they mixed it up with their to-do list.
And one thing I wanna point out about this section,
it's about like, big money is behind climate change,
which is fucking hilarious from an oil company.
But Kevin Sorbo begins this narration
with a huge sad sigh.
He's like, so the climate, and they didn't do a second take.
It's just him, he might as well,
he might as well begin this section
by being like, I was fucking Hercules.
Anyways.
So, but yeah, the point is that,
you know, it was not better.
I heard that earlier.
Climate change is big money
and the National Science Foundation is a huge money suck.
I've never understood this argument,
or it's like, I get the argument
because they just say stupid shit all the time.
So I get, oh, this is just another stupid fucking argument.
But what I don't get is how people believe this.
Like how people go, oh yeah, big climate.
But then they're like, those, pathetic oil company. It's so confusing.
Yeah. Skeptic nerds with a podcast and oil barons and they're confused by who's behind
this and make who has something to gain. I don't get it. I just don't get it.
We also get one of the pundits here who says that the only group that gets money at MIT
is the climate change group. And I wrote in my notes, really, not the bomb guys. I feel
like the bomb guys get a little bit of money.
They have a couple other departments, I think, at that institution.
And then we go back very quickly to the hypocrisy argument because Al Gore sold his TV network
to Al Jazeera.
Right.
And Al Jazeera is an oil company.
It's always like, big oil, they own other shit.
It's almost like there's big money in being an oil company.
Yeah, they own stuff, not confusing.
And also as he starts to try and tell why he's made this decision
and why this sort of the calculus was making sense,
they just cut him off.
They don't like, we didn't hear his answer.
He's a dick.
Yeah, that's so good.
You're like, okay. He's literally like, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no're like, no, no, no, I totally understand the concern.
Al Jazeera, you know, oil money that I'm selling them this thing.
I will explain.
Cut.
It's a hard cut straight to Professor Walrus talking about the polar bears again, I think.
Yeah, yeah, they cut to Professor Walrus explaining that big polar bear is behind people saying that the polar bears
are dying.
Oh yeah, he literally made the argument like these polar bear scientists are getting so
much money.
And it's like what like the four guys who study polar bears like what are you talking
about?
Also the people who study animals are the saddest weirdos of the science world.
The saddest weirdos of the science world are the animal watchers who just watch their
species and speciality go extinct during their lifetime.
Right?
I mean, the best people with the most interest in people.
You can get cornered by them at the next step to convention.
Hey, I have them on my show all the time. And I love
that because they're very existential. Absolutely. I'm going to buddwire themselves in the middle of
an episode of Talknery. If our show has a running theme, it is me making a bud wire. There it is.
Bingo square everybody chance I get.
Angelo draws the bud wire square.
That's going to be.
You think everybody, everybody just took a swig of whatever they were drinking.
Sorry, I was checking if buddwire.com was taken so I could buy it and redirected to carousel.
So, can you guys believe that it took this long into the movie for them to mention George
Soros?
Yeah.
That's why they bring up George.
Almost impressive.
Yeah.
This is where they talk about the real goal of climate change activism to bring about communism.
Because yeah, that makes sense.
Yeah, the molecules in the atmosphere are crisis actors just moving faster.
Well, what's amazing is they show this clip of AOC saying we need to make the biggest economic
investment since World War II, but they're trying to play it like AOC is Hitler.
Right. We need to decimate who is through here. What?
But to be clear, we are absolutely trying to steal money from rich people. Like that is
part, like they give us AOC's chief of staff who says green new deal isn't just
a climate thing.
It's an economy thing too.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I mean, it's called the fucking new deal.
That's in it, not just green.
Right.
That's part of the thing.
But you know, they stole money from us and we're trying to steal it.
Of course, we're doing that.
Right.
They're saying like, why don't we start to develop some new economic policies that help bridge
the massive divide between rich and poor, which is a new phenomenon.
Our income inequality has only severely grown since, you know, Oregon era.
Yeah, like since before I was born, but like it's not that long ago that the new deal
was something that everybody supported. So the issue here is that they're
saying, yes, climate change is inextricably linked to the economy. And yes, there are
ways that we can solve these problems or at least work towards solving these problems together.
And they're like, shut up, Kami. Oh, yeah. Maybe cap and trade. Oh, yeah. Well, we've got the former prime minister of the Czech Republic who says communism is bad. Oh, it's so bad. It's so bad. And also, yeah,
it's all George Soros's fault. Yeah, he's funding apparently all of the, he's giving
all that big money to big polar bear. Yeah. And again, we're doing a lot of callbacks
to the fucking dark web George Soros satanic
cult here.
This is also where they explain that the UN wants to create a global government.
Right.
I wrote my notes, man, either these movies are running together or we've been watching
the same movie every week for 271 weeks.
Yeah.
And that's the thing too.
Like I think people listening because they have the added
benefit of never fucking having to sit through these pop pieces. They think that we're probably
exaggerating. Like, oh yeah, they're saying that, that like the commis just want a global government.
No, they use the words global government. They literally think the UN wants to take over
as the new world order.
Yep, yeah, very literally.
But don't worry, if this movie's got you blue,
if it's got you down about the climate monarchy
and their rule of the world,
we're gonna talk about the person who stopped it all.
A hero named Donald Trump.
Pfft. Pfft. Ouch. it all, a hero named Donald Trump.
Ouch.
And this is where they're going to talk about how Donald Trump pulled us out of the Paris
Climate Accords because you were allowed to just send the Paris Climate Accords any old
piece of paper and they would staple them together.
Right.
So first they talk about how it's a nothing accord that has no teeth. And then they
talk about how it was like a massive win to get out of it. Like you can't have all your
arguments both ways people. Trump pulled back a piece of paper that said nothing. Congratulations.
I don't know. And they show, I love how they show when the climate accord was first enacted.
Like when it was first passed, the roomful of people cheering and looking really excited. And they like, you know, edit it so that
that would be like bad. Look at all these people.
Low motion clapping.
There's like little horns growing out of their heads.
And now we're going to hear about how we can, as our final title card tells
us, fight for freedom. It's a clip of Mark Marino being like us complaining about how much
America sucks and a French guy who is totally real told me that America is the freest place in the world. Right. Yeah.
He describes America as like the last soldier to fight against the oppression of the one
world government, I guess.
Right.
Yeah.
America is the antidote to 1984, which is apparently happening everywhere else.
I don't, I don't get it.
Like, who is Big brother in this scenario?
The U.N. Maybe they got really confused because they also tried to insert a brave new world
reference in the U.N. They did. They had to immediately abandon it because they were dead
and no idea. Yeah, yeah. Brave New World. Yeah.
We're going to cut back to the former prime minister of Jackson, Slovakia, who famously
embarrassed himself in his entire country when he addressed the UN and basically said,
no, climate change isn't real, but he gets to tell the story now.
And in his story, everyone applauded for him, not out of politeness, because they loved
it.
And then they came up to him afterwards and said, we totally agree with you, but we can't say that out loud.
It's a secret.
Oh, yeah.
It would look bad, but also don't write it down
and don't videotape this.
Right.
Also, just one other note on this guy
and like most of the rest of their panel of quote experts,
they've all got a mustache and
no beard. And if all your experts have a mustache and no beard, your thing is fucking wrong.
Like, I don't even look at the science or the numbers.
You drop in the knowledge.
A softball team of cops. It's, it's not working out.
Oh, wait, who wrote this? This is my favorite.
America is unique because freedom, freedom not to wipe chocolate from the side.
Damn right.
Damn right.
Absolutely.
Oh, he was one of the best experts.
He was one of the best experts.
So with that call to arms against not oil out of the way, We're gonna check back in with little AOC who is going to introduce
a panel, a post movie panel. Wait, it's not a panel if there's only two people.
It's just two people. It's just one person interviewing somebody.
That's talking. Not just that. One of them is the person who made the movie. And the other
person is certifiable crazy person
Liz Wheeler
Liz Wheeler. Yeah, I didn't know anything about Liz Wheeler before this
But I mean I learned everything I needed to know from like the first seven words that came up ready
Here's what you need to know. Oh, you see what I've highlighted here
Liz Wheeler has a minor in homeland security from Penn State University
Okay, yeah in Homeland Security from Penn State University. Okay. Yeah.
Pretty cool.
And does she have like a TV?
Oh yeah, she's on one America news.
A TV network that I didn't know existed
until President Trump took office,
and he only called on their reporters.
They're like Fox News on racism.
Like they're like,
I mean, that's not even a good. I kind of redundant.
I know, like I'm trying to think,
I was gonna say on steroids,
but like, how can you be worse than Fox News?
That's OAN.
Bright bar.
Yeah, it's like TV Bright Bar.
You're right.
Yeah.
It's like TV Bright Bar.
There you go.
Oh, Steve Bannon just got banned from the internet.
Like the entire internet.
I just watched a crazy documentary about Steve Bannon.
What a fucking crazy guy.
I think he's related to the quasi-moto guy.
They have a lot of similar features.
So Liz Wheeler interviews Mark Marano for a second
and then Mark Marano introduces a clip of Liz Wheeler
on OAN yelling about AOC.
Oh, it's so weird.
She's like, one, why should I believe you?
Cause you're wrong.
Two, you promised me the polar bears would be dead.
I hate polar bears.
Three, you said I could eat a guy.
And then, and then the clip ends and he goes,
well done Liz and she goes, well done Mark.
And she says, thank you Mark and he goes, well done Liz. And she goes, well done, Mark. And she says, thank you, Mark.
And he says, thank you, Liz.
And they are definitely not robots.
And then he shows clips of Bill Nye saying, this movie is a hot pile of garbage.
And Jimmy Kimmel also saying, this movie is a hot pile of garbage. Yeah, it was fun. And Jimmy Kimmel also saying this movie
is a hot pile of garbage, but like funny.
Right.
And then that's an argument.
I don't understand.
Like it's so funny.
Every time they try to show like the counterpoints
to shit on, I'm like, yes, yes, I agree.
Yeah.
Hot pile of garbage got it.
Yeah, that's what I took away from this too.
And then finally, because they found out they needed a third member for it to be a panel
They're gonna interview 1980s newsman John Stossel who apparently did his last report about the inside of a deep frat fryer
What the fuck happened to his face
Also, I didn't know that John Stossel was like
Like fell to the dark side.
Should I have known that? I don't watch Fox News.
Now, did you see the mustache in no beard?
I mean-
I mean- And there's your clue.
Shut it down.
And to be fair, all John Stossel has to say is, my daughter fucking hates me.
That is the entirety of his segment.
It is, yeah, yeah, yeah.
She's like, oh, you're a fucking sell-out shill. I hate you.
That's it.
Okay, back to you as we are.
And that's the movie.
That's the movie.
But we forgot to, we did forget to mention that when little AOC came back and said more horrible things that were even, doesn't she like shit on trends?
Yeah, she's a little transphobic joke in there.
Yeah, she got a transphobic joke.
And she rolls up in her like Barbie Jeep.
Yeah.
And she's like, hello, like I'm like AOC
and I'm like driving an electric car.
Like that's a bad thing.
Yeah.
I just, you know, I'm like, ooh, I'm watching it
and I go, ooh, I drive an electric car.
How are we as we're sweet, too?
Yeah.
So lootly.
I just, I don't, I don't get it, you guys.
I don't get why people are how people watch this
and go, yeah, fuck that,
bye.
Weird.
I was so relieved when the movie was over.
I was so relieved, but then they, like,
had a weird barber shop quartet, like, sting us out. Yeah, that was at the end of the first movie too. The anti climate change
bybershop quartet. All right. Well, we got some barbershop quartet and we're done. That's
official. So last thing before we wrap it up, again, Karen's been saying all this nerd
stuff, data blah, blah, blah, whatever, whatever chill Eli, after watching this, how confident are you that global warming is real?
Pennsylvania.
Kara counterpoint.
Oh, hi.
All right.
And one more thing, exactly how much money are you getting from big polar bear?
Oh, yeah, that's. that's what I heard you.
That's what she said.
That's what she said.
All right.
Well, that does it for our review of Climate Hustle 2.
That's not going to do it for the episode just yet.
We all enjoyed learning to count up to 270 for hundreds of hours in a row, but we found
a great way to refresh your brain
and take a little break. So we lie. Tell us what's on deck. It's time to dive back into the
weird and wild world of secret agent MS. Great. Wonderful. So with that to look forward to,
we'll bring episode 272 to a merciful close. As always, big thanks to Cara for joining us.
And where can everyone hear more your stuff?
You can go to caracanamaria.com. You can go to talknerty.com.
Apparently, you can go to skinbook.
But Dwyer.
I don't know. But Dwyer.
Skinbook.com.
Climb at elites.com.
No. So yeah, just look up talk nerdy with carousel to maria of course the skeptic sky to the universe
i'd say check me out on twitter cuz that's where i run a feed that has lots of
cool new science every week so you can keep up with what's going on in the world
of science
all the time
apparently the penis means nothing that's what I learned like this week, right?
Yeah, yeah.
I interviewed your relevant.
No, it's not irrelevant.
It's just not as powerful as you might think.
All right.
And of course, a big thanks to our Patreon donors for all the generosity.
If you'd like to help support the show, you can make a per episode donation at patreon.com
slash Godawthl.
And I'll get your early access to an ad free version of every episode. You can also help us out by leaving us good
reviews and by sharing the show on all your various social media platforms. And if you
enjoyed this show, sure to check out our sibling shows, the skating atheist, citation
needed, skeptic rat, D&D minus, all available in those podcast places. If you have comments,
questions or cinematic suggestions, you can email God awful movies at gmail.com, legal
services to this podcast are provided to the offices of P. Android Torres.
Our theme song is written and performed by Ryan Slotnik, a people dressed on Mars.
All other music was written and performed by our audio engineer Morgan Clark and was used with
permission. Thanks again for giving us a chunk of your life this week. For Karris San Maria and
Eli Bosnick, I'm Heathen Wright, promise you to work hard, turn another chunk next week.
Until then, we'll leave you with the Animal House clothes.
another chunk next week. Until then, we'll leave you with the animal house clothes.
Breakfast clothes.
And care about the penisisirrelevant.com
before Eli could.
Oh man!
And Kevin Sorbo went on to become glue. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha The
preceding podcast was a production of Puzzle and a Thunderstorm LLC copyright 2020 all rights reserved.