God Awful Movies - 341: Level

Episode Date: March 1, 2022

This week, Michael Marshall joins us for a skeptical review of the flat-earth documentary Level, the story of what the people who aren't thinking are thinking. --- Check out more from Marsh on Be Rea...sonable and Skeptics with a K --- If you’d like to make a per episode donation and get monthly bonus episodes, please check us out on Patreon: http://patreon.com/godawful Check out our other shows, The Scathing Atheist, The Skepticrat, Citation Needed, and D&D Minus. Our theme music is written and performed by Ryan Slotnick of Evil Giraffes on Mars. If you’d like to hear more, check out their Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/EvilGiraffesOnMars/?fref=ts All our other music was written and performed by Morgan Clarke. To hear more from him, check him out here: https://www.morganclarkemusic.com/

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Starting point is 00:00:00 This argument is that we've got Hubble Space Telescope in space, so why don't we point it at the Earth to get some awesome shards as like me? You're essentially saying, I've got these binoculars, I'm going to see what my car looks like. That's not what the tools for. It's not the direct limit. Like, you basically want Hubble to knock on your door and try and sell you an aerial photo of your house.
Starting point is 00:00:26 That's not what the tools for. Okay, I feel like the binoculars thing is a bad example. Like I know what I'm saying, and we'd come to do the Hubble thing, but like, I mean... God awful! Movie! Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will be? Who will my good friend. He then right heath. Welcome back or am I know right to baby right now. Just summarized the entire episode right there and sitting 900 miles to my northeast is my bad friend Eli Bosnick Eli. How are you this fine afternoon, sir? Healed through the power of crazy. No, I healed through the power of crazy. All right. And rounding out the panel tonight,
Starting point is 00:01:22 sitting 4100 miles to my east northeast. If you believe in that sort of thing is my neutral friend Michael Marshall, Marshall. Welcome back. Yeah, actually, what condolent directions to Jewish illuminati, Freemason's scant. I think about it. Condolent direction, codnal sin coincidence. Condolent are Stanford cardinal. So that's not Jewish people go there. I don't know. The confidence, the combat are Stanford cardinal so quick. So, Jewish people go there. I don't know.
Starting point is 00:01:48 There you go. So tell us, Ethan, what will we be breaking down today? We watched flat. No. What? It was level. It's at the top of the thing. I thought it was flat.
Starting point is 00:02:00 It's a flat earth documentary. We lost one of those. I don't know. I think it's real. I think they tried. I think it's hard. earth documentary. We lost one of those. I don't know. I think it's real. I think they tried. I think the hardest, maybe satire at moments, but I really do think they tried. Oh, no, no, no, no, no.
Starting point is 00:02:12 This is Eric De Bay. This is Melts, Satire from the hip. His Nazi stuff isn't satire and vegan arts. That's not satirical, not satism. We'll get to it. So Eli, how bad was this movie? Well, if you ever told a YouTube commenter to make their own movie and see how that goes, and you meant it, you will love this movie.
Starting point is 00:02:36 It's YouTube comments, the movie everybody. The movie, yes it is. It really is. Oh, has there anything you want to nominate this one for me the best to be the worst at? Yes, I would. Noah, I'm gonna go with best worst panel of experts, especially their job titles that they tell us. We're gonna, I'm gonna leave it
Starting point is 00:02:57 until we get to it the actual job titles, but they're so dumb. This is why I thought it was satire. I was like, oh, they had this has you absolutely could not have made up sillier job titles to give these people. Yeah. And you can you don't have to put a chiron. No, if it's dumb, you could just have day. If the answer's dumb, just have the person start talking, but they don't, they put up a dumb chiron that gets dumber and double. It's amazing. All right, so I was going to go with best worst insults.
Starting point is 00:03:30 Okay. So throughout this movie, they try out a couple of different epithets for round earth believers. And I just, I feel like they could have done better. I don't think any of them are going to stay. They're trying so hard to figure out a slur for everyone, but them. Right. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:03:48 I think they call this a slur, right? During the move, they call this a slur. I think they call this a slur. They're hoping it's a slur. They're certainly hoping. Yeah, they've aimed for slur. If they've chuts wide of that, that is not through a lot of missing.
Starting point is 00:04:01 Right. Exactly. If you swing and miss on a slow, that's works. Actually, right? Well, not to give away some of Heath's throw forward there, but I want to go with best worst individual expert because in this documentary, we meet for the first time and I've never met this guy before. Santos Bernacci, who is, he says he's a toler mayer, astrologer. Yes, brought in. And at one point, 90% of what he says is bleeped for obscenity.
Starting point is 00:04:29 Long enough. They couldn't keep him on track and clean long enough in their movies. Not like they were working with clips that already existed. They set him off and they couldn't get him just off. Yeah, no, I'm something of an expert and profanity. I could not figure out what this guy was saying. It was amazing. Not any time.
Starting point is 00:04:49 Never. I want the uncut version of this. Marsh, you need to have him on be reasonable. Yeah, you down. I mean, I've added him to my list. Oh, I'm afraid he's going on my list for me. Uncensored raw raw. I'm going to go with best worst introduction to a sentence.
Starting point is 00:05:07 Podcast listener, we've been doing this show for six and a half years and I'm going to admit, I was pretty sure I was unbreakable, but there is a sentence introduction. So mind boggling and insane in this movie that I have been reborn as a new man who sees the world through different eyes. We will get to it. I honestly have no idea which sentence you, it could be so many sentences. It could be any one of them. I know which one. You got to look into your heart because you know. It may have been the greatest three words ever. And like, it was right up there with Jesus, man,
Starting point is 00:05:45 we'll get there, we'll get there. All right, well, we've got a lot of inexplicable slow motion talking to prepare for. So we're gonna take a quick break, but we're back in a flash with all the primordial argumentation that is. Hi, I'm Eli Posnik, and I'm Heathen Wright. You know, here I've got awful movies.
Starting point is 00:06:07 We try to keep our ads fun and interesting with little sketches, songs and comedic shenanigans, but sometimes we need to take a break from those shenanigans because the sponsor is just so good. We just tell you about it. Yeah, and there's no better example than this week's first sponsor, Trade Coffee, who don't sell CBD stuff, Marsh for the record. Oh, yeah, yeah. Very proud of you guys.
Starting point is 00:06:29 Well done on that. Thank you. It is well done. Thank you, Marsh. So trade sells the freshest roasted and ethically sourced beans from America's best independent roasters. They ship free to you as often as you like whole or ground. They gave us the three month trial for free.
Starting point is 00:06:44 And I don't know about you, Heath, but I loved every blend they sent me so much that I signed up as a customer, which I'm not gonna lie, felt a little weird using my own coupon code on something, but it was that great. I just signed up for trade coffee. So whether you're a coffee nerd
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Starting point is 00:07:18 slash awful and start your journey to your perfect cup. That's drinktraded.com slash awful for $20 off your first three bags. Trade coffee, a product so good. We can just talk about it. Feels awkward not to have a punchline. Yeah, it feels awkward. I agree a little bit. Yes. Yee-haw. I'm a country cowboy. You, Marsh, perfect. Much better. Nice. You're welcome. Are you from? Alright guys, it's time to make our flatter documentary level. Y'all are in. If I do say some myself and I'm gonna, I think we've gathered the finest minds possible to do it. First, there's odd. He's a rapper who saw him mostly about how he hates to juice. What up, man? Show for show. Now, we also have a Brazilian. So much to
Starting point is 00:08:12 get me to man. We also have a Brazilian jujitsu participant. Who gives a fuck? Nobody. Hey, guys, I am ready to roll with the earth. That's right, man. It's been like a DJ thing, right, roll. Yeah. You guys say that barely even descendants. And of course, there's beauty with the brains. Over here, we got Przinka Barnica. She's here.
Starting point is 00:08:36 I see that you're recovering well from your botched eyeball liposuction. Tungo Jay name. Yeah, now let's put the facts out there. And narrate like we're challenging our kids, mom's new husband to a fight outside our child support here, huh? I actually did that. Yeah, I need to be too. Exactly. I think that you said what can have children because of the incident.
Starting point is 00:08:58 What? Yeah, you're kind of bringing down the mood, Brasinka. Get a brain show. we know? We know. I don't even know what those of it to be. No, me neither. And we're back for the breakdown and we're gonna open up with a new twist on the FBI warning. Apparently the movie is warning the FBI. They were in the FBI. It's like, we know the fucking law, but it looks like the FBI warning, but it's them yelling that,
Starting point is 00:09:28 which is never in history a good sign when somebody yells, we know the law. No, never, never something good happened after that. Like nine out of 10 times, if you yell, we know the law, electricity is about to course through your body. So they're gonna get, yes. And you deserve it. And then we go to the logos your body. So they can get. Mm-hmm. Yes. And you deserve it. And then we go to the logos quick.
Starting point is 00:09:48 Don't blank. Yeah. I mean, we don't see a lot of nothing screams we couldn't afford to hire a graphic designer than showing us the logo for three quarters of a second. All that. I don't know. Maybe logo just disappeared over the not horizon.
Starting point is 00:10:02 May that's what I could be. I could be. There's thing if a logo says, Hibbler Productions, which in three quarters a second looks a lot like Himmler or Hitler Productions. It looks as much like it sounds like that. Yeah, exactly. Maybe spread it out for a couple of seconds so I can say that it's not Himmler or Hitler. Maybe you start with the B, right?
Starting point is 00:10:23 You start with the B and let the rest of the word fill it around it, right? Or if your name's Hibbler, you name your production company something else. It's not your life. I'm a Steve Productions. It's Steve Productions. Yeah. Yeah. You have a first name too.
Starting point is 00:10:36 So we get that. Then we open on the earth and the narrator cuts in and says, do you believe this is a live recording? I'm like, I'm watching it on YouTube. So no, I don't believe that. Also, we can see this massive white light sauce above the earth, which very clearly isn't the sun. So, also no.
Starting point is 00:10:55 Yeah, right, you know what I mean? He might as well be showing us the universal logo. Right, and they're like, we'll do it in a sec. Oh yeah, right. They're like, believe it or not. This is CGI. We're like, wait, well, yeah. So then we get their credits and it's so funny because they're all like, you know, they've all heard of each other.
Starting point is 00:11:14 So they're real proud of it. Right. Oh my God. Rough. Well, I've heard of some of these. I'd heard of Dave Murphy. In fact, I've met Dave Murphy, the person that they've got in here. Seriously? Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'd heard of Dave Murphy. In fact, I've met Dave Murphy, the person that they've got in here.
Starting point is 00:11:25 Seriously? Yeah, yeah, yeah. So he did a talk at the UK for Earth Convention. And then when I give a talk, I told the UK doing my talk about the flat earth convention and the flat earth movement. And when I did the talk in Brighton, he was there, which was awkward because I talk about him in the talk. So there's a bit where I'm sort of like on the talk, pointing at my PowerPoint, going, and this is Dave Murphy and then point you at the audience going, and that is Dave Murphy. And they believe this. He's got the same backwards fitted hat as in the big, wow, that's, is that your one? Is that the guy? Is the guy who always? No, no, no, no, it's
Starting point is 00:11:58 the guy from Baszled in England. Oh, okay. The British guy. Yeah, yeah. He's the guy who drinks his own piss and doesn't like me. Okay. And that's that's not one of the jokes that we do on this show. He literally drinks and washes with his own piss. That's the thing that he does with his own piss. He is the least crazy looking of their cast. He is. And the least crazy talking. Yep. He's probably the most crazy smelling. I feel like if someone drinks their own pee, you want them not to like you. I think you have asked questions about yourself. If someone drinks their own pee, likes you never bothered to be. So that's a true fact about people who drink their own pee.
Starting point is 00:12:32 The other thing, the other true fact about people who wash in their own pee is you want them to tell you that before you shake their hands and not afterwards. Yep. Fair. But now your hand is, you know, COVID-free or whatever. Yeah, my hands are going to get cancer. No cancer. So the credits wrap up and the narrator exposed to us that flat earth was actually a top search
Starting point is 00:12:52 term from 2015 to 2017. And the point he's making isn't that Americans are profoundly stupid. I mean, that's not like what he's trying, the point he's trying to make. Okay. So was Matt Lauer. That was another. I think it was the number two search room in the all of 2017 in the US. It's not a good thing.
Starting point is 00:13:10 He points out that while much of America was, you know, trying to elect Donald Trump, the rest of us were figuring out that the world is flat. But his point is, you know, right around the time that America is something incredibly stupid, they also thought the world was flat. Yes, that's not a point in his column. No. Right, right. At the absolute height of disinformation, flat earth was a popular search term. And then it's time for us to meet our first expert of this, I guess, geology, slash astrophysics documentary. He's an out-of-work rapper.
Starting point is 00:13:43 physics documentary, he's an out of work rapper. Yep. Earth scientist number one, there will be six. I believe Earth scientist number one is a person named odd TV. Mm-hmm. That's a O dot D dot D. I don't know what it stands for, but odd TV, he's a very bad white rapper. Yes. Really bad. He is. And as they interview him, it seems that the intoing him under the only bush on his entire land, because he's in complete darkness.
Starting point is 00:14:13 Right. Did he only agree to appear in this under the cover of anonymity? Is that why you're completely cast in shadow? I think he's half in witness protection. And he doesn't really know what that means. Right. The right half of this. Yeah. Right. So he shadowed out like half his face. Guys, it's okay. They only saw me in profile.
Starting point is 00:14:30 And there's a guy run with his name. So like, what are you doing? I was pondering at this point, I got loads of ads all the way through this. And at this point, one minute into it or so, it cut to an ad for Hello, Fresh. And I thought, God, don't you hear it when you're trying to consume a piece of media? And they start just talking about Hello Fresh out of no one. Guys, this is not what I chewed in for. We all got frustrated by that. Uh-huh. The up. We'll get it together. We'll help.
Starting point is 00:14:56 But odd TV explains to us that you never see pictures of the curvature of the earth except in all the places where you do see it, which are all bullshit, right? Yeah. So, Flat Earthers get a lot of mileage, or at least they think they do, out of the fact that like sometimes when you think you're seeing the curvature of the earth, you're looking to a fish eye lens and don't realize it, you know, things like that. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:15:23 So, they're making this point, but of course, they're overstating it and saying, but there are no pictures that show the curvature of the earth. Yeah. He says, I couldn't find the curvature of the earth. So there isn't one. It's like, yeah, but you also couldn't find a better rap name than all the TV. So you know, for a spot at your fucking yard where you wouldn't be in dark. And what he meant is he like walked outside looked left right. Other two. No, not curvy.
Starting point is 00:15:50 Yeah, but David, if he was just going to sit around and do nothing, well, everybody else was going to understand that the earth was round. So he decided to rap battle the roundness of the earth, I guess. Yeah. And he talks about how when you go higher up, the horizon, first of all, the horizon rises to eye level, which he says, which would be impossible on the ball. And I don't know what he thinks eye level means. Right, yes, that would depend.
Starting point is 00:16:17 I wonder what he's equally confused that you can see further round a corner in the road if you step into the road rather than stay on the pavement. You see a little bit further when you step into the curve. He's equally confused by that, I imagine. I love it was supposed to fall away from you. What is he thinking? Well, yeah, but he, so like right when you're about to dismiss him as some kind of cranky experience, that he did his own research on YouTube. And that was back in the heyday of YouTube when, you know, there was really no check on
Starting point is 00:16:52 disinformation. Yeah. He says it was an awesome time for YouTube between 2015 and 2017. And he just wrote in my notes, strong disagree. Yeah. Almost took down democracy itself. Yeah. But in case you're not convinced yet, they show us one frame of a Google ad with no context that says the earth is flat. This really irritates me because why would Google mention the flat earth and a commercial?
Starting point is 00:17:19 I'm saying, maybe probably as an example of what people would believe in if they don't have access to information. You are the worst case scenario. You are the before and Google wants to be the after. Right. There's a picture of you and then a line that says there's got to be a better way. Yes. It's literally just a commercial where they typed out the words, the earth is flat and then
Starting point is 00:17:40 they said other things. I have no, there was content no Thomas Friedman agrees with us. The world's right. You would have fucking knuckle about it. What are you talking about? The world's a fucking oyster according to an old saying. I don't know. Oyster.
Starting point is 00:17:55 His no less. So yeah, but according to on TV, YouTube was quote, collapsing with truth. And then we show this like YouTube representative talking to Congress and they say, like, oh, you know, we're trying to promote low quality content that's full of demonstrable lies. And the orchestra goes, yeah, they're trying to make, we're going to try and be more transparent and include more facts. Sound sinister. That's the bad guy thing. Yeah. Yeah. And the lady from YouTube, she's laughing. She's like, yeah, so we're putting a little thing that says, you guys are stupid
Starting point is 00:18:32 on those videos, which is sitting below this video the whole time. Yeah. And the politician jumps in and tries to stop her and says, yeah, yeah, whatever. And the reason the politician jumps in is because even the politician recognizes that adding a, no, it isn't pop up to an earth is flat video is a weak response that is not good enough for you. Right. That's why he interrupts. Well, but then they explain the real nefarious plan that you two bet it wasn't to get rid of them.
Starting point is 00:18:55 It was to get new videos making these round earth claims from all of their puppets. Yep. And there's a lovely bit of start this way. It shows people on TV all around the world sort of show it is saying like, oh, and aren't these flat earthers out there now? There's all these flat earthers. And the point they say in the movie is, well, now they're talking about the flat earth. So yeah, they're saying you're obviously wrong and evidently an idiot.
Starting point is 00:19:19 Yeah. That isn't a plus in it. Well, at least they're talking about me. Yeah, they're calling you names and calling you stupid. That's not good for you. Right. There's like a whole montage of video clips where a bunch of smart people point out
Starting point is 00:19:29 how stupid this video is. I mean, why did you guys put this in? Are we supposed to be like, is it, we supposed to be getting sympathetic to how mean Neil deGrasse Tyson is being to you? Fuck, oh, did we do this thing? I think we forgot to do this thing music after Neil. Like he said, he just said, yeah, this point.
Starting point is 00:19:46 Damn, too late. So, and then they provide for us their first piece of evidence, I guess, and it is, this is the evidence, right? The argument, I said primordial arguments, because I don't think these ever quite coalescent of full arguments, but the argument is, sure, looks like the sun is moving to me. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:20:06 Right. They do the fucking sun video recreation. Yeah, it's like does it look like the sun is traveling across our sky? No, no, no, it doesn't. But then they're like, well, what if we show it again with some digital manipulation that I've done to prove my point? Does it now? Well, now you've digitally manipulated it a little bit. Yes, it does, but you've digitally manipulated it.
Starting point is 00:20:28 But even then not really so like it reminds me of the like when Joe Rogan would say that the trade towers look like a controlled demolition, right? Is it compared to what other naturally collapsing sky? You haven't seen a bunch of sons that are moving across the sky and a bunch of sons that are stationary as the fucking world turns. What the fuck are you comparing it to? Do they think the sun is flat too? Don't think so. They think the earth is flat. Some of them do. Some of them think it's like a torch, so it might have a slightly bowed front, like a convex front. Others think it's a ball. They know about depth, then. The dimension. They know about depth as a dimension, but they don't add it to their arguments or their
Starting point is 00:21:10 logic. They like to keep those nice and superficial. I just want to say I'm not comfortable saying they know about depth. There's a statement. No, no. One of the clips in here is great because it is a fisheye lens, which shows the sun going down and then coming up again, because it must be a sun like near one of the clips in here is great because it is a fisheye lens, which shows the sun going down and then coming up again, because it must be a sunlight near one of the poles where you don't get
Starting point is 00:21:29 like full night there. But in their world where they think the sun starts to get further away from you and that's how night happens, what do they think happened here? Did they think it was like the sun was going away and then like, forgot it's wallet or something and it's looking back for it. So like, at the furthest point, the sun like stops and then paths all of its pockets and this really exaggerated, well, I get it. Oh, I forgot. So I just didn't get anyone's watching
Starting point is 00:21:53 and they don't feel embarrassed behind that. You know, the sun forgot its mask in the car and it's like, oh, I gotta hate COVID. Okay, they made, I'm pretty, they made like a sting video of the sun getting caught not setting all the That's what they do not say at any time that this is video of some, you know, North Pole ass shit, right? Chris Hansen just comes out and he's like I was gonna wait back the other way Chris Hansen turns to the sun have a seat for me
Starting point is 00:22:21 I was going to wait back the other way. Chris Hansen turns to the sun. Have a seat for me. Come on. And just as you're thinking to yourself, wait, what's that smell? It's time for us to meet Dave Murphy. Take Murphy. Now he's the first of he's best worst.
Starting point is 00:22:34 He's, he's like, well, he's the second. I believe all your right. He was earth scientist number one. This is earth scientist number two. No, give him credit. Well, but he's the first one that gets a great job title listing, right? The other guy was just, okay, rap artist.
Starting point is 00:22:47 Yes, he is. He is, he is quote, former Wall Street computer programmer. That's not a thing there. I could go to Wall Street and program a computer. Anyway, slash volunteer firefighter. Oh, okay. And it's not clear if former like distributive property goes to both of those like being quite make it as volunteer fireman either. I can fill in a bit of his backstory if you guys want. So he was a volunteer fireman in New Jersey.
Starting point is 00:23:19 And he became a 9-11 truth that after 9-11 happened. Yep. Oh my God. Dave Murphy's New Jersey is every episode for a while. Because he wasn't involved in all of that. He saw it from a distance. He saw that was, that was all happening. He became an 11 truth there. And then in his own words that he gets upset if you quote, he says on his website that after that, he had a mid-life crisis that led him to live off the grid and start drinking his own piss. And then he became a flat-earther. Hmm. That is a brief biography. So there is a down look. Dave Murphy is just the proof that there's a downhill from 9-11 Truth. We just didn't know that for sure. We suspected
Starting point is 00:23:54 it. But yeah, so he starts making some arguments here. These are fascinating to me because I cannot for the life of me figure out what the fuck he's trying to say. If the sun was round and the earth was round, all the light would be parallel. Right. No. Which it wouldn't. No, no. No, it wouldn't. If they were. If it was flat to be parallel.
Starting point is 00:24:18 And face to death. If they were massively far away, it would feel like they were parallel. But the bigger point to me is, what does he mean by the, how does he know the light around him is in parallel? When you look around, it's like, oh man, there's meant to be loads of parallel light here, but every light beam that I see is fucking converged. Right, don't die, yeah, you know what I'm saying.
Starting point is 00:24:35 What the fuck could that mean? Okay, I think he's a flat sonner too. I think they're flat sonners. So he, he, I think he is. I think he's, he sonner too. I think they're flat sonners. So he, I think he is. I think he's, he's, I don't think they know that they're flat sonners, but they all. He might not be a flat sonner. He's definitely a small near sonner. Yes, the son is very small and very near. Right. So yeah, yeah, yeah, that's why that's why the light is converging. So he's not a flat sonner. He's a round sonner because the light has to come out of the son convergingly. So it all converges up at the sun. Right. Well, and then to prove that, they show like these shadows
Starting point is 00:25:08 where the light is diffused through clouds and shit and be like, how did the light get diffused through that cloud? You just said it. You said it. Yeah, now, what is a cloud made of in your head? This argument is really, really stupid for two reasons. One is you're absolutely right. Those clouds cloud made of in your head? This argument is is is really really stupid for two reasons. One is you're absolutely right.
Starting point is 00:25:26 Those clouds are made of water, vapor. You've got yourself a prism there. Kis closed, but also to those light beams that they're showing, they're not hitting the cloud necessarily and dispersing wide. That is also what it would look like. If the light was really far away from you coming sort of straight at you, but then as it gets close to you, there's bits going either side of you. You know, it's like if you hold all things that are relatively parallel to a conversion point at you, but then as it gets close to you, there's bits going either side of you.
Starting point is 00:25:45 It's like if you hold all things that are relatively parallel to a conversion point at you, as it gets close to you, it's going to look like it's really wide. Do you know what I mean? It's like that's, yeah, it's just that the sun's fucking miles away, mate. It's, it's nothing. Out of that. Hold on, hold on, Marsh, what I have another theory. There might be a second light shooter sun on the grass. No. Oh,
Starting point is 00:26:06 that is why they're not parallel. My favorite thing about this section is that he gets interrupted by himself criticizing himself. And then he gets nasty with himself. It's like, what what a boom. There's like, shut the fuck up me. So yeah, no, they have a guy cut in there, right? Because they have a dude come in and say, well, wait a minute. If the sun, the earth was flat, wouldn't it always be sunny? But he asked the question in his dumb guy voice. So we know it's a stupid question. And we're very glad that we didn't ask that stupid question.
Starting point is 00:26:38 Yeah. Right. And Dave Murphy's like, are you stupid or what? Yeah. I'm so glad you asked. And then he doesn't even have a good answer. No, he doesn't. So he always talks about the sun being up as well as I, oh, the sun is just up.
Starting point is 00:26:52 It's like six miles above the surf to me. It's up. Well, like up isn't a meaningful direction on a spinning up ball anyway. You know, it's like saying you're on a fairground ride and your mum is stood watching and she's to your left. If you're going around the fairground, she's not always to your left. The sun isn't always, oh, it's relative. They keep doing that for the whole. Yeah. They just, they're locked in on. There's this up principle in their head. I don't know what it's based. God is there. Well, and they have this amazing, like he tries to do this visualization of how the sun works in his mind, which would be like, imagine a flat round earth in a flashlight just being
Starting point is 00:27:29 moved around the edges of it sort of from the middle, right? Sure. If that's confusing to you, we get a movie. So I know, I know us describing a flashlight over a table is very difficult, but we see it. And I got it once I saw it. Well, he, how big would that flashlight have to be? Would you say in, say, millimeters to the nearest point one of a millimeter? Well, 3.4. Yeah, but then,
Starting point is 00:27:50 then it's going to be a certain distance away from like a table or something, isn't it? Yeah. So 21, I got, I got 31, Dave specificities, if you imagine a two meter table in a dark room with a 3.4 millimeter light bulb, 31 centimeters away from it, and if you imagine a two meter table in a dark room with a 3.4 millimeter light bulb 31 cent, cent of it is away from it. And if you imagine you've drank 260 milliliters of your urine that morning as well. Yeah, I got lost on all the, yeah, the metric stuff. That's why my demons, I did it at home and I did get confused. Gotcha. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:28:20 You do it in period. Right. Yeah. So the point, of course, by using all these very specific numbers, he's trying to make it sound like he's just made a point, right? Yeah, so also the but the point though, of course, if by using all these very specific numbers, he's trying to make it sound like he's just made a point, right? Yeah. But he can't help but undermine his own point because then, you know, the obvious question is okay, but even if the sun wasn't over you, if it was that bright, you could just see it when it was over there in the sky if the earth is fucking flat. Yeah. Right? At night, if we just looked north,
Starting point is 00:28:42 we would see this gigantic goddamn light. And he explains that no, you wouldn't because it would be too dark where you are to see the light. Yeah, it's amazing. If you're studying Jeb, oh, you can't see light. If you're studying the shade, you can't see light. It's so dark. Yeah, it's too dark for you to see the light.
Starting point is 00:29:01 That's all he said. He thinks he's back. Like this point, because he set up this whole thing with numbers and units and metric and flashlight. And then he's like, okay, so you've got it all locked in, right? With all the numbers of them. The dark parts dark cut. Right. So that's by definition. There's no way he goes. It's the sunlight. This is there is no sunset. It's all local light. And I'm like, there's no sun at this point. It's gaslight, motherfucker. We all watch that shit.
Starting point is 00:29:29 Yeah. He's like, we see a local sun and it's taking its local light with it, like a kind of, it's, it's my not a ball. So I'm taking it home if you won't pay by my rule. He also explains to us here that sunsets tend to fade because of all the exact quote, dander and chemtrails. Yeah, I don't know which of those is way itta. Oh, I missed that.
Starting point is 00:29:53 Did he actually say chemtrails? Like the chemtrails is way, but dander, dander, like the bits of skin from a cat. Yeah, what's he done? Yeah. You walk into someone's house and you're like, I'm so sorry. Do you have a cat or a Jewish conspiracy plane because I just, oh, my nose. I can't even see you.
Starting point is 00:30:11 There's one bit that I do need to bring in, right? Because during this, they're talking about what the images of the flat earth that they have showed you to try and put you off, right? And it flashes through all these different images of what's wrong about the flat earth. And importantly, some of the images that is short this point were images from Mark Sargent, the famous flat other who did flatter. It's called on this show. And that's really important because the whole reason this exists is because Mark Sargent was in the Netflix documentary and not Eric DeBay. And Eric DeBays pissy about
Starting point is 00:30:40 that. So he's made a dollar. So he included these things in the middle of this. Oh, that's the guy who's there. They're saying, and nobody promoting this bullshit would know anything about. Yeah. That's the guy. When they show Marx, I just think that Nordic process bullshit stands for the truth. That whoa, shots fight, Marx, I'm, but you know, Christian. So they censored bullshit. Right. Yeah. It's an idiot fight. He's mad. He's not the captain of the idiots. That's amazing. That's awesome. Yeah. I'm so happy. So. Yeah. So they show us some more clouds and they go, eh, eh, and we're like, what? Eh. And then they go, so what about the moon? Yeah. That was my next question. Right. Because now that they've cleared up all the sun stuff
Starting point is 00:31:21 and they explain to us here that the moon is essentially like a little sissy sun. It's the opposite. Yes, we all agree. It has the opposite effects from the sun. Which I think is the stupidest line in this. Yeah, yeah. We all know, obviously the moon has the exact opposite effects of the sun. You know, the moon makes things darker.
Starting point is 00:31:42 It kills sunburn. It kills plants. Everybody is aware of these features of the sun, you know, the moon makes things darker. It kills sunburn. It kills plants. Everybody is aware of these beaches of the moon. It they've say, well, you know, it's so weird. They tell you that the moon doesn't have cold moon light. It cools things down. But why then is it warmer in the shade when the moon's out? I'm like, yes, why would shaded places really ate less heat into the atmosphere than the hunt. This is, this is one of my favorites. You could fight the arguments like shade during a hot day is cooler than not shade, but shade during a cold night is less cold than not being exposed and being out exposed to the entire air. It's like, well, think of it this way. Like, you know how your skin gets hotter in the sun when it's uncovered.
Starting point is 00:32:28 But if you're naked outside in the middle of the night, you get cold. That's because the world's flat. Last man. It's because too much moon is sucked off the heat off of you. I want to talk about black and white footage, wrong man. Oh my god. Black and white footage, the legacy, but this is what they're hoping to become one day. This guy, because this is fucking amazing.
Starting point is 00:32:50 I had never seen this guy brought up before. And of course, it must have happened that like at the time before we actually went to the moon, there was a guy who managed to get on TV who was like, no, moon's not real. It's fucking toxic plasma or whatever the fuck. cosmic plasma. cosmic plasma right where is the other plasma what other kind of plasma there be do you know who this guy is
Starting point is 00:33:12 spiritual. Because nobody the internet knows who this guy is really call professor our foster and that is all of the information that exists about him. Anywhere that I can find I've never heard of this guy and when I tried to research him, I found fuck all. So, yeah, this film doesn't even give his full limbs, so you know he's legit. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:33:33 To be fair to him, like, four weeks after he filmed that interview, we landed on the fucking moon of Netflix. Yeah. Right. His entire interview about how the moon isn't made of rock. It's made of cosmic plasma. It's a minute. He's like, he might as well be in the middle of the interview, being like, it's actually made a cheese vapor. You couldn't possibly land on it. They landed on the moon. Yeah. Yeah. Just now, are you scared? Like the four seasons interview. Oh, you're
Starting point is 00:34:01 peatly doing it. They pull away the background. He's at the four seasons. Yeah. Skipping as well. Yeah. It's the quickly Kevin Wilheys score of the moon landing. Now that's nothing to you guys, but British listeners who are who understand the history of English football teams will know quickly Kevin will he score? Yes, he misses. That's exactly what happened here. That's exactly what this guy's doing. All right. That's going to not land with you guys, but I don't care. Is that how you guys have won the World Cup since 1960? So, six, six, six, six, yeah. Yeah. Actually, we won the World Cup between this guy, saying we wouldn't land on the moon
Starting point is 00:34:36 and then landing on the moon. And we've got about as close to winning the World Cup as you've got to land on the moon. We are much better at moving on. Yeah, there you go. Nope. So, yeah, so they also claim that we can see stars through the moon. This is a great argument. And we're like, would you like to show us a video of that?
Starting point is 00:34:55 Like we would not like to show you a video or a photograph of that note. What I love about this argument is, I saw this argument debunked at the flat earth conference by Dave Murphy who said this was a stupid argument. He gave a presentation about how stupid this argument was. Awesome. You ever think about the fact that like flat earthers get to permanently live in the 1600s, where all scientists and doctors just got to turn to each other and be like, no, turns
Starting point is 00:35:22 out your nuts, supposed to light someone's balls on fire. Oh, demon science. Yeah. Okay, no, but they live so much, they live like 2000 years before we've known that the Earth is around since like 500 BC. It's 1592, Heath. We'll learn this soon. It was 1592 and it was the Jesuits.
Starting point is 00:35:39 So right. No, you're right. So yeah, but just as you're thinking to yourself, like, last but we've landed people on the moon, then you remember where we are and we enter into the moon landing a hoax phase of this stream of consciousness ass video. Right, they literally, they actually present the, if Neil Armstrong was the first person on the moon
Starting point is 00:35:59 who took the video argument. Oh my God, that's so amazing. Okay, that was a compelling question. What? Like, there was just a camera on the outside. They knew this was going to happen. The plan was for him to walk on the moon the whole time. But did camera person, did they have an argument about like where the camera, like the camera,
Starting point is 00:36:19 did the camera have to go out there first? No, the camera, there was just a camera on the out mounted on the outside of that landing vehicle. Yeah, I'm like one of the legs. Very convenient. Yeah. So no, no, no, who was the cameraman? And also, you know, who was the best boy? And who was the key?
Starting point is 00:36:32 Yeah, right. Well, exactly who was the runner? He's got to the location. Who was taking care of craft services? Come on. Okay, Marsh and Noah, I will need you to talk me down from all the moon landing stuff. So I'm sorry now.
Starting point is 00:36:43 Good job on that first one. We'll see how you do. Also, I'm sorry. We are going to need to not skimp over who presents us with that argument. eyebrows girl. Yes. Uh huh. Who is like someone saw my Melania Trump character and they were like, but Cockney though. Like, yeah. Could you imagine her, but could she be from Leeds in the North of it? Not going to go. That's the one thing missing from it. Yeah, her eyebrows appear, and I don't blame them appear to be trying to escape the thoughts in her brain and literally get further and further apart in between shots.
Starting point is 00:37:19 Yes. Well, and this is an amazing argument to it. He shows this press conference and he's like, oh, like do these people look like they are about to go to the moon? They look bored to me and I'm like, yeah, look out board the astronauts look during this long press conference while they're on a grueling ass training schedule getting no sleep. Wh-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p argument if they went to the moon, how come they didn't hug? Yeah, yeah. And I thought this press conference was once they were back.
Starting point is 00:37:48 I couldn't remember. I didn't, I wasn't sure if it was either way. I thought it was basically like, yeah, they're fucked from having a really massive, weird, intense trip. And now they've got a sitting congress in front of people. But now, you know, why didn't Buzz Aldrin hug every politician he met? Right. I've never once seen Buzz Aldrin tongue kiss a sitting US senator in there for and therefore the world's flat. Yeah, they show us both. They made the argument
Starting point is 00:38:08 on both sides of it. They're like, do these people look like they're about to go to the moon? Does this guy look like he just came back to the moon? I'm like, does he only people with ever seen go to the fucking moon? Yeah. So do they look like they're about to be sent in a mission where there is a very high chance they're going to die and die in a really public way, like right in front of their friends and family in a big explosion and stuff. Yeah. Also, it was the 1960s, my dude. Most people didn't hug their fucking dad on his deathbed. Imagine if your whole moon landing theory rested on the fact that Michael Collins looked a bit grumpy. Yeah, they paid me to pretend I was walking the moon and you know,
Starting point is 00:38:45 so they could lie to the entire world, but they stopped just short of a somewhere I do with a smile. You've got to say that's not a joke. That's the movie's theory is seriously, well, the conspiracy couldn't afford to pay him for the hugging and smiling money. Yeah, like seriously, that's the theory. Yeah. They think the astronauts were delivering the same performance as Toby McGuire and the latest spider man movie. He's like, all right, I'm here. I'm fucking here. Well, but so that he's got one of them talking before Congress. And he's like, look at this. He never even looks up from his notes. If he'd been to the moon, you'd think he would be a better public speaker. Why? That's not the criteria we send people to the moon on.
Starting point is 00:39:28 He did well. No speech and debate on the moon. Yeah. This guy was really good at the after dinner event. Yeah. He had some really hilarious other thoughts. He's been an absolute riot on the moon. They actually, they actually think the conspiracy people are like, fuck, we should have spent
Starting point is 00:39:42 that extra money on smiling and hugging. Yeah. We did this one guy called us because of that. I told, we should have spent that extra money on smiling and hugging. Yeah. We did this one guy called us because of that. I told you we should have spent that money. And that close out to this argument is they haven't had the balls to fake another. And I thought, you know what? I'm going to make a response to this video where I argue that testicles are actually flats and anyone who stands for a ball, is paid by the Jews to beat me right now.
Starting point is 00:40:01 Yeah, right. Come on, Neil deGrasse Tyson. Show us your balls. All right, well, we've just switched conspiracy horses mid race at this point. So I need a minute to catch up. So we're just going to take a quick break, but on the other side of it, there'll be even more level. Hi, I'm Eli Bosnik and I'm Michael Marshall. Do you believe the world is flat and that a secret cabal of Jews is hiding the truth from
Starting point is 00:40:25 us? Well, then you might want to try therapy or medication or, you know, both. But you don't have to be in a schizophrenic fugue state for therapy to work. And that's why there's better help. Sometimes you just need someone impartial to talk to the stresses of everyday life with. Or someone who can help you understand and manage your emotions. Better help is online therapy that offers video, phone, and even live chat sessions with your therapist, so you don't have to see anyone on camera if you don't want to. It's much more affordable than in-person therapy, and you can be matched with a therapist in under 48 hours. Give it a try and see why over 2 million people have used Better Help online therapy. This podcast is sponsored by BetterHelp and got off a movie's listeners get 10% off their first month at BetterHelp.com slashawful.
Starting point is 00:41:07 That's BETTRHELP.com slashawful. They also don't sell CBD stuff. Have you considered therapy to help you get over this? No. Well, there it is. So much money, Marsh. Alright, you ready for your tear too? Yep,'s do it. All right. Let's get started cool So where you from oh God all over actually I grew up as a military brat so yeah, I'm from all over the globe in a way Just all over the place. It's so funny that you say globe
Starting point is 00:41:41 Oh, well, why is that funny? Well, have you heard of flat earth theory? Well, that's good right there cool Huh, yeah tattoo. It looks great. Yeah, all set. Thank you so much That's all dude. I've just I barely even got started right right, but honestly, I like it better this way Kind of minimalist, you know, I think it's perfect But didn't you say this was a memorial for your cousin? Mm-hmm, yeah, but I think I would have, you know, I think he would have wanted a little like, a little black squiggle like that. He'd love that, this is perfect.
Starting point is 00:42:12 It's a dude, you already paid me 500 bucks. No, it's a money well spent, yep. So where's my coat? No, never mind, I see it, I see my coat. It's all good. Do you, I mean, do you want to wait for your ride to show up? There's a buzzer down the side.
Starting point is 00:42:24 No, I'm good, I'm great. Thank you Man, that's like the fourth one this week. I must draw a damn good squiggle This is better. This is better than the other thing. I like this better. I made a good decision And we're back for more of this shit and we're going to rejoin the action on quite possibly the greatest three words ever spoken in a god-off movie. Okay, this is Eli's thing. Yep, we are about to meet our next talking head. And he opens up his monologue on the nature of astrophysics with the words,
Starting point is 00:43:04 Eli, would you like to do the honors? As a tattooer. That's not even what your profession is called. Here's my notes for this scene. As a tattooer. As a tattooer. As a tattooer.
Starting point is 00:43:21 Guys, guys, as a tattooer, as a tattooer, as a tattooer, as a tattooer, as a tattooer, I will not start a sentence again in my life without as a tattooer. As a tattooer, I will be consensus as a tattooer for the rest of my life as a tattooer. Like, yes, listen, as you can hear, I have a little bit of a baby cold right now. I got a cold from a baby worth it, but still have a cold. So I was on vocal rest all day yesterday. So I could do this funny, fun podcast for you today. I broke that vocal rest and screamed the words as a tattooer, but I heard this
Starting point is 00:43:58 and then lost my voice again. The only words I spoke on Thursday, February 24, were as attached to or at the top of my possible boy. So yeah, so this is Johnny Jim Papa in addition to tattoo or he is also listed as quote, line nobility CEO co-owner of Opus Glove, which I really want to just be a glove him and his buddy. In the ultimate in jerk off device. Yep. It's not great that so far the movie's experts have been a rapper at tattooer and a guy who drinks his own piss. The drink. That's so far. And can I just say, guy who drinks his own piss?
Starting point is 00:44:50 Most reliable. Yeah, absolutely. Yeah, absolutely. And just to keep you track, this is Earth Scientist number three. Yes. His name is Johnny, not John, not Jonathan. Nope. Johnny.
Starting point is 00:45:02 Johnny. And he gives one of the best arguments. Marsh, you probably heard this before. I haven't. He says, if NASA was legit, all they'd have to do to prove the round earth would to take one of their so called satellites, zoom all the way in on an Australian driving their car upside down. Yes, yes, what that cannot really be one of their arguments rights 100% 100% this is several of the arguments in Eric DeBase 200 proofs the earth is not a spinning ball which he brought out in like 2016 2017 something about that which is what the fuck is this is, in fairness to him, I think some of his arguments in that are we should zoom in on Paris
Starting point is 00:45:51 and see the Eiffel Tower side on, which is slightly less stupid, only slightly less stupid by like an order of magnitude given the size of the Eiffel Tower than the people in Australia in a car. But the thing is, what I love about this is, right, let's imagine that NASA had the kind of technology that they could zoom all the way in to people individually in a car moving around in real time. You would lose your shit if that was a thing that existed. You would freak the fuck out. All right, these people would be crazy about the idea that a satellite was tracking them to the level that they could watch you driving your car and see you in the car. That's why we don't have that kind of weird
Starting point is 00:46:29 spy satellite. Like it's some sort of fucking sci-fi where you're shouting Enhan's image at the computer until you see the atoms you're made out of. But has nobody ever just like shown him picture of an Australian person like a physical photo and then been like, yeah. You see what's happening, buddy? And he was like, show me a demigorgan walking on a fucking seal and that don't get like what is happening in his head? So yeah. So and then he explains that we have to discredit Buzz Aldrin, right? Because he's such a vocal opponent of him being a liar as a theory.
Starting point is 00:47:10 So they show this video where Buzz is, I'm going to say conservatively in his late 110's. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Right. This is a century after he walked on the moon, 100%. Right. And he stumbles over his words a little bit such that unless you allow him to finish
Starting point is 00:47:28 his sentence, it sounds like he says they didn't walk on the moon. Yeah. I felt like I will need to be talked down from this one too. I'm pretty sure he gave away the conspiracy. You know, you always let it slip to an eight year old in a local library. Right. I'll trick the shit out of him and he gave it up. Yeah. year old in a local library. Right. The shit out of him any gave it up. Yeah, it's an entirely reasonable position, Heath, as long as you don't watch the rest of
Starting point is 00:47:49 that video where it goes on to explain that we just haven't spent the money on. And it's really clear that a super old buzz is just trying to explain, trying to figure how to open to an eight year old that progress is significantly held up by politicians who won't spend money doing important stuff. That's what he's trying to pass out to the other part of the video. That's you. You sound like that. You're saying. It's also pretty important to remember that Buzz Aldrin and the other astronauts were just the pilots we were most willing to let die in 1960. Yep. Yep. So we weren't working with the cream of the crap. If you could say absolutely working with the cream of the crap, they had the right stuff,
Starting point is 00:48:32 God damn it. And you see him punch that guy when he was like 900 years old. Yeah. Right. That was so good. He does a joe peshy jump punch from my cousin, Vinnie. It's so fucking great. And by the way, I know that the right stuff was about the, but never mind.
Starting point is 00:48:46 You know what, I'm not giving, not even going back for that question. No one's picking you up on that. That's fine. Wait, the right stuff. That's not what that's about. So, yeah, so, but they explained to you the tattoo artist explains to you at the, I'm sorry, tattoo or self-identified. Okay.
Starting point is 00:49:00 Not even a tattooist. Yeah, no, a tattoo or, I guess tattoo artists might be legally protected. Maybe he can't say that. I was just to be I use a term he used as a tattoo or he wants to explain to us that their goal is to make you think that you're a monkey man and I'm like a filthy one at that. Yeah, that's definitely all. Yep. Yeah, they want you to think you're a monkey man, a purposeless accident, Christian movie.
Starting point is 00:49:22 It's a flat-ed movie. Yep. It is inevitably a Christian movie. It's also inevitably an anti-Semitism movie, but it accident, Christian movie. It's a flat-ed movie. It is inevitably a Christian movie. It's also inevitably an anti-Semitism movie, but it's a Christian movie. So Christian movie, yeah, we got it. So do these people believe that the firmament thing, that it's just like you would bump your head if you went to try to go to outer space and you'd like be like, no, pink? Definitely, definitely some of them would. Yeah, definitely some of them. And then you'd fall back down, but not because
Starting point is 00:49:44 of gravity, because of something else. Because of buoyancy. Many of them will tell you that the NASA hit the firmament and that's why shit exploded up there. Yeah. Oh, yeah, yeah. Absolutely. The other thing this, um, Tatooa says is that all the pictures you've seen of the Earth
Starting point is 00:50:00 in space are just expensive cartoons. And I'm like, mate, I wouldn't be so quick to complain about expensive cartoons if I did tattoos for a living. Yeah. But you're really pissing your off when you're on doorstep. I was so mad. He said so many times we don't have a picture
Starting point is 00:50:17 of Earth from space that I actually Googled it. And I got three letters into Googling before Google was like, here's a picture of the Earth from space. There you go. Here's a lot of pictures. There's so do want more God damn many of them. And this is also the first time I discovered that NASA is very clearly dual in their website.
Starting point is 00:50:34 Their website is either for children who love space or idiots like me. Yeah. So it's like, hey kids, welcome and also Eli. Yes, we have a picture of earth from space. Disappointed in you for googling. And this is where they present what they seem to think is one of their strongest arguments. The idea that all of the space walks are fake. They use, they're, they're done in water and we can tell because sometimes you can see bubbles rising off
Starting point is 00:51:03 the astronauts as they do space walks. You, you can't see that. Nope. No, here's the thing. There are conspiracy theories about space where you're like, all right, if you didn't understand it, I can see why you would believe that, right? So like when you see the things where the pockets stick out weird and they're like, that's a harness.
Starting point is 00:51:22 It's like, yeah, if you don't understand how zero gravity affects fabric, that really does look like a fabric. Yeah, these dust particles do not look like bubble. No, no, they don't also. If you are really deep underwater and your suit is letting our bubbles, that's also really bad. That's really bad. Really, really bad. And then we see poor Scott Kelly. We see these guys doing their whole. It's more of a comment than a question bit at some Q&A that Scott Kelly is doing. Fuck yes.
Starting point is 00:51:56 Where they're asking about the bubbles in space. And of course, you can tell that he knows right away. He's like, oh, you're one of those assholes, but he can't, but the audience doesn't yet know that he's one of those assholes. So he goes, and then he gives the honest answer that the audience will be expecting. There's this fucking amazing moment where he goes, oh, oh, because he gets confronted later by the guy for the same guy. He goes, you know what you can do? And I see the moment. Yeah, I see the moment where this literal genius who has spent his whole life trying to make this species of racist, evil, garbage monkeys, even a little bit better say, you can fuck yourself and he's like,
Starting point is 00:52:39 you can use those images yourself. If you want. This is the amazing thing. Because why are you selling those photos? They were paid for by the government. They were paid for by taxpayers. We should be able to have those photos for free. Because the public domain.
Starting point is 00:52:55 You can. Well, they should be free to the taxpayers. That's what public domain means. Yeah, you just admit you don't want public. What? You could have edited this out. So you got the edit. They are literally free. And you watch it. The other guy this you got the edit. They are literally free and you watch it The other guy you watch the flat out there be like that fucking backfire. We should cut this
Starting point is 00:53:11 Why the fuck was that in the movie? Take it out. He's selling this but they they they're harassing him while he's selling this book that contains a bunch of these photos from space And he's like you can't sell this like, that what it means is that anyone can sell them. You fucking it. Yeah. Also, I just want to point out that when he tries to do his gotcha question at the Q and A thing, his gotcha question literally is, well, I see all those bubbles and stuff. Could it be that you're filming in an underwater pool? And everybody goes, not every laughs because he's a big guy. And I was like, what the fuck underwater? But like, no, we're filming in an overwater pool
Starting point is 00:53:51 like in Australia. Yeah. To you. No, we won't photograph it. It's Australia's a hoax. They live in the, we live in the up. And Australia is in the down under like what? And then we cut to fucking England's Miss Xanax 2017 again
Starting point is 00:54:08 I browse yeah, so she's gonna tell us that she's not buying this whole Space station bullshit, right? Okay, her first argument is that if the space station goes that fast around the earth The astronauts would fall off. Yes, right. You know, like, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me,
Starting point is 00:54:31 me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me. I'm on her side, but I think she's the, I don't think she believes that. I hope not. Yeah. You're just saying that so she doesn't draw one of her eyebrows onto your face. Yeah. Right. Right. Send it to suck out your blood and the night or something. Mars, it's behind you right now. But yeah. But they explain that they're doing all of that, like, wait shit on the ISS with wires and CGI and a zero G plane. You know, they're just flying in a parabola, which you know, we can only do for 30 seconds and the shots that we're currently watching are longer than 30 seconds, but we won't touch on that.
Starting point is 00:55:19 And also, but so, but there's no space up there. You can actually go as high as you want, Martian, and then come back to that. That's true. Right. That makes a lot of sense, dude. But also, their other idea, therefore, has to be that Chris Hatfield was kept in hiding for months, other ways. So nobody would accidentally see him walking down the street when he's meant to be in space and stuff. Right. Except when they put him on a plane to fly parabolas about where nobody would spot him. What's the
Starting point is 00:55:43 plane doing doing weird stuff in the air? I'm sure we shouldn't look into that in our space. Okay, okay, Marge, you're so smart. Then explain to me why NASA, if they're not faking all of this video, would have grids on some of the walls in some of their facilities. It's exactly, exactly. Exactly. Exactly.
Starting point is 00:56:02 Really bad. So they're like, oh, it's blue screen with grids. Isn't that really bad for blue screen? Yep. But if you've got white grids and then the guy's in front of the white grids, he's got a shirt with white bits on. Isn't that really bad when weather presenters start to disappear in front of the map because they were in the same color as the green screen?
Starting point is 00:56:17 Sure is. Yeah. Okay. Good. It's the perfect crime. Yeah. So they make this argument and then they're like, and you'll notice this, when we manipulate these videos, you can see they've been manipulated.
Starting point is 00:56:29 Yeah. We really need to spend more money on the CGI and the smile fees, because like, I really think they're catching on like to a bunch of stuff where we just had to budget a little bit more for a couple of things. We had the money to launch rockets to the fucken firmament, but we couldn't pay for smiles and CGI for the blue screen. Well, and they show us these videos where the video glitches and shit like that. And they're like, oh, you can tell it's being done in front of a green screen because look at all of these weird glitches that happen when we try to beam live video down from
Starting point is 00:56:58 God damn fucking space. And I'm like, oh, my video games are done on green screen too. Right? That's how they do football as well. Apparently. Yeah. This is also where they throw in one of my first best works. This is where they try out the term globe heads. Yeah. They say, why these globe heads keep defending that's and I'm like, that's going on my business card right there. I wrote it in my, in our notes, I wrote that is our word. How do you do that? Also, if, if they're calling us globe heads because we believe the world is a three-dimensional object, what heads do they think they are?
Starting point is 00:57:40 Yes, right. I'm a proud flathead. Shit. Yeah, right. I did. I believe the pun based epithets to the professionals, a proud flathead. Shit. Yeah, right. Damn, at least the pun based epithets to the professionals, you flat-sauce. You could say glow bar, not glow ball. So and then we have this little fantasy where they show us what it would look like if NASA sent somebody out to finally admit that they'd been faking it this whole time.
Starting point is 00:58:02 Yes. And they would hire a guy with a shitty thin ponytail. It's like, because they couldn't find a physicist so they found a pickup artist. That's what NASA would go for. Yeah. This guy is a mace because the whole time, they're trying to do smart guy talk, but none of them can get smart guy talk down so he keeps saying stuff like we will repay all the tax payers back. Okay, well they can't clearly write smart people stuff at all, but even if they had been able to write smart people stuff, this guy is not a strong reader. So it didn't know he's not even B level. No, it's the unfortunate popcorn in high school English where he'd be like popcorn this guy
Starting point is 00:58:47 and he's like, the bird goes to that, you're like, oh, please popcorn back to someone who can read good. But it's also not helped by what he's reading because he's got them saying, you know, the money will pay the money back. And it'll be distributed evenly between the citizens of America and America. And it's like, he had to pause, sorry, I'm going to read this, right? I must have got the wrong. That is just for a joke here.
Starting point is 00:59:11 Okay. Okay. All right. So, and then we hear from Frank and Eddie Bravo, whose qualifications to speak on astrophysics are, quote, founder and owner of 10th planet, jujitsu slash innovator of Brazilian jujitsu. I want to know how he innovated Brazilian jujitsu somewhere. He added extra planets to it and everything. He's like jujitsu jazz, you know, he's just innovative.
Starting point is 00:59:43 It's all about the moves he doesn't do. Exactly. Yeah. Yeah. He also, he outlines his space, expertise and how much knowledge he has about space, including that he knows about a newton star and a super highver Norber. Yeah, he was, he's talked about how like, he used to think he was so much better than everybody else because he knew what shaped the earth. Why?
Starting point is 01:00:06 Like we do. Like us. And also, this is the first, not the worst offender here, but this is the first guy that cusses like it with every word except the prepositions, but they're bleeping out all the cuss words. Right. It gets worse, but you cannot tell what this guy is fucking saying. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:00:23 Just tell me fuck. What is he? just tell me fuck. What is he saying? Fuck. What is he saying? Fuck. And he's another people who his argument is that we've got Hubble space telescope in space. So why don't we point it at the Earth to get some awesome shots as like me?
Starting point is 01:00:37 You're essentially saying, I've got these binoculars. I'm gonna see what my car looks like. That's not what the dude is for. It's not the direct meme. Like, you basically want Hubble to knock on your door and try and sell you an aerial photo of your host. That's not what the tools for. Okay, I feel like the binoculars things are bad example.
Starting point is 01:00:56 Like I always say, and we don't do the Hubble thing, but like, I mean, well, we've all done the binoculars. Well, and he starts pointing out once again, like, you know how suspicious it is that NASA's always making all these CGI animations instead of just showing us actual video of the Big Bang. So fucking dumb, he's like all the pictures of Earth or CGI except one and it was created with a computer generated it. It's, right? Like every time they're like, it's all fake except this one, which is also fake. They just don't admit that this one is fake. And what he doesn't get is like all digital photos are computer generated.
Starting point is 01:01:39 You, like, right, take a selfie, put it on your laptop, zoom in to like 20,000%. And you see how your face is made up of lots of weird squares. That means your fake and you don't exist. By your option. Remember when you did the penis binoculars and it was really confusing? It's like that. I've been a spreadsheet this whole time. Yeah, right. Right. And then they have this weird bit where he's, I apparently had some fucking podcaster, whatever yelling at the other three people in the small room with him.
Starting point is 01:02:09 It's got to be Rogan. He's definitely on Rogan at some point. Oh, he was literally on Rogan at the beginning of the scene. Now he's on his own podcaster. Oh, okay. Yeah. Joe Rogan is basically the undeclared collaborator on this. The number of times we see Rogan throughout this, he's basically undeclared to collaborate on this movie. Yeah. It's weird. Rogan doesn't use the
Starting point is 01:02:27 N word during this interview with a person of color who's a Brazilian Jesuit expert. It's so weird. Huh. So we're selective. I'm not willing to say that he didn't do that. Well, yeah, that's not in this clip. Yeah. The clip we're showing does not include the N word literally as far as we can go. Yeah. The highest praise we have for Joe Rogan here. literally as far as we can go. Yeah. The highest praise we have for Joe Rogan here. But he explains on his podcast that he's, you know, he's not running around telling people that they need to prove their claims, like some criminal in a court. What? I am entirely unsurprised that this guy's go to metaphor. The first one in his arsenal is being a defendant in court. That does not get us with this one.
Starting point is 01:03:08 Was he even clear though? Whether he, I don't think he knew he tried to do a court thing and he got confused halfway through. He's like, I'm like the first. He's a shooter. I say guilt. If you're not guilt, the person who says the def, it's flat. It's a fucking flatter.
Starting point is 01:03:23 I don't know. The middle of that wave of me. Only criminals ask you to prove things. who says the def, it's flat. It's a fucking flatter. Yeah, I don't know. I don't know. The middle of that wave of me. Only criminals ask you to prove things. I have a Dodge Stratus. And then we enter into the gravity. How does it work phase of this guy's rant about how stupid he personally is, right?
Starting point is 01:03:39 His first argument is, well, if gravity can hold whole oceans and great big skyscrapers, why can't it hold a helium balloon? Dude, you really don't want to get into gravity in your flat earth movie. You just skip gravity and you skip the chiron about tattooer. There's just things you can skip. It's yours.
Starting point is 01:04:00 Why would you expose how little you know about testable kitchen sink reality? We're like, I genuinely can empathize with like, why does this base suit look like that? Those dust particles kind of look like mumbles, right? I get it. I don't get like, if you drop an apple, it's because it's thicker than you. What? What?
Starting point is 01:04:24 Yeah. But this is it. He believes it's all density, you know, things that are less dense go up, things that are more dense go down. It's like, yeah, Dee, but why is that? What's making the more dense thing go down trying to say the word you're avoiding? You're so close. Right. It's like the equivalent of saying, if you let go of an apple, it hits the floor.
Starting point is 01:04:44 What made it hit the floor? Your fingers? Because you... Scott Paul begins like, yes, yes, your fingers played a role. It's not, that's dumb. You're putting words into my mouth. The apple's aware of its density and it has a chart of other air.
Starting point is 01:05:02 Air has a density and the apple looks at it. Yeah. It's flat, motherfucker. of others. Air has a density and the apple looks at it. Yeah. It's flat, motherfucker. A bunch of flies equally are aware of that density. Yes. Uh-huh. But so, okay, but here's the problem with you guys' argument is that you're a bunch of
Starting point is 01:05:15 fucking Nazis because murder, Brian, Brian was a Nazi and he did rockets. He kind of came up with the whole thing. So rockets are Nazis. Sure. Also fun fact about Von Braun, he had the accent of a Kabaqwa guy doing a little phone call after a kidnapping who was communist. Yeah. For a voice modulator. I also like because one of the guys in this movie is like super fucking anti-Semitic, right? Yeah. At least one.
Starting point is 01:05:48 So they're like, Vertivon Braun was a Nazi, but to clarify a bad one, like a bad one who was faking them. Yes, right. Absolutely. In fact, they bleep out the word Nazi. Yes. We don't hear the word Nazi. They censored the word Nazi.
Starting point is 01:06:00 Yeah, you didn't want to piss off your audience there. Did you, Eric? Do you be? He said, yeah, you didn't want to piss off your audience there. Did you, Eric Dubay, with Eric Dubay of the rap fame behind the song's Bruce Hitler and goyem revolution, which were genuinely songs that Eric Dubay has recorded. Are you serious? Yeah, he's got an anti-Semitic rap album. Goyem revolution. Goyem revolution.
Starting point is 01:06:19 And Bruce Hitler. And is there like somebody named Bruce Hitler now who's like the great-grandson of? I didn't get fully through it unless I met I wasn't followed. I was, I was feeling the beat, but I wasn't really paying attention to the lyrical picture he was painting. So in the way that they introduced Werner von Braun here too is they have a bunch of like Werner von Braun quotes that they're reading in the silly voice-modulated
Starting point is 01:06:45 evil voice, but they're also mixing them in with like things they're pretty sure he would have said, you know? Yeah, like I'm going to make so much fucking money. It's crazy, which I don't think was a direct quote. I could, I don't know about that one particular thing. How about Jesus Christ? These guys can't fucking act about Neil Armstrong. Was that? Was that a good place in Vombron? I believe that was verbatim actually. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:07:11 Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And so, and of course, we also learn here that this is too appropriate for God off of movies because the globe head view is refuted by a little document called The Bible. Sorry. Yeah. I forgot about Globehead, the slur. So then we cut to Marcia's best works. We go to Mexico. We meet Santos Banachi whose qualifications are listed as quote, this is the best one, musicians slash astro-theologists. Astro-theologists. I don't even know what that would mean.
Starting point is 01:07:51 Is that like, why religion is the sun? I don't know. All right. Now Venus is definitely Muslim. I mean, you know what I'm saying, right? I'm clearly. Yeah, right. I'm clearly.
Starting point is 01:08:02 It's definitely. So it's veiled. In furnace, he's the firstologist we've heard from. So he, yeah, right. That's definitely. Clearly. So I it's veiled. In fairness, he's the first oligist we've heard from. So he's closest to science. No, you're right. It wasn't a tattoo oligist or a rapologist, just because they wouldn't let that guy call himself a tattoo oligist. That's true. That is true. Well, they didn't know how many O's to put in it. Honestly, that's what fucking up. I think we know Uranus Catholic. So, but here's this guy I absolutely need to hear this guy on be reasonable. He is 18 seconds into his profanity filled ran before he has told us that evolution is bullshit.
Starting point is 01:08:40 The problem is those demon crat atheists and NASA runs Disney. That's a run Disney. Oh, to NASA doesn't have that kind of budget like. So dumb. And he says, and if you don't believe me, it's because you're redacted. There's that. That's when it means starting. Imagine thinking that this weird rant in which he includes, he says that the round
Starting point is 01:09:07 earth was invented in 1542 by the Jesuits. Imagine thinking this rant was helpful to your argument. Like, hey, no, this guy just cut him. Well, how are you going to cut, though,'re only tall of me, I got strong. That is true. He's got, he's got value. And I love just the little things they have to leave in because it's the only stuff of his that wasn't bleeped. Like, for example, well, you talk about how everybody these days believes around the earth is around. He says, well, all of our intelligent ancestors will be rolling in their graves. It's like, that's, that's neither of the phrases. You hit neither of those words. Well, it also points out that like, you know, what are the odds that stars wouldn't twinkle?
Starting point is 01:09:54 Uh, everything he says is saying, like, he's like, you know, well, why is it that all the stars with the same luminosity have the exact same luminosity? Yeah. And then as if that's not dumb enough, he's like, do you really mean to tell me that the earth just happens to orbit at 66,600 miles per hour? Like Satan, a Satan number, it would pick a Satan number? Times 100.
Starting point is 01:10:21 I mean, I don't mean to tell him that because it isn't true. It's more like 67,000 and change. You have to round a real weird ass way to get to 66,600, but also like, you also have to use miles per hour. So it's not like, say, Tannik in England, right? I don't. Yeah, like mainland Europe France, they've got a different system. It's a different got a, it's like baffomatic, but not so technical. Yeah. Imperial, if you will. Yeah. He also said at one point, how come the stars in the sky look
Starting point is 01:10:53 the same for thousands of years? It's like, because we aren't alive for longer than that. That's what we can't tell the difference. It takes longer to change. He goes at what point, he'd the argument from fucking etymology. He goes, hello, horizon means horizontal. Hello sea level means it's level. Yeah. And then he says, if we were on a globe, you'd have to call it sea. You can hear the dot, dot, dot, and then he goes curve.
Starting point is 01:11:23 You'd have to call it see curve. I saw that in Marsh's notes before I wrote this and I thought, that's a pretty solid joke, Marsh. No, no, no. Yeah, he can't call it sea level. You've got to call it see curve. He also says you can't have tectonic plates. It'd have to be tectonic balls. And I thought, yeah, keep going. You can't have the magic circle. It had half to the magic sphere. You can't do that. You'll have to live in a round. Keep going, keep going. He also takes a moment to yell at Laura Eisenhower. What the fuck you Laura Eisenhower? Like she turned him down for it. Kate. Yeah. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:12:05 Yeah. He also refers to as the granddaughter of her grandfather. Yeah. It's damning, which to me, there she is. Look at her. Oh, no. The granddaughter of her grandfather. He gets one.
Starting point is 01:12:19 Well, to be fair, he said a lot of other true shit. It was all just bleeped out because fuck shit shit fuck is true. That is true. That is true. That is true. He's constantly bleeped. He also says at one point to believe this, you'd have to be stupid beyond your wildest imagination. It's like, yeah, but like if I'm that stupid, wouldn't my powers of imagination be quite
Starting point is 01:12:38 limited? So like, it wouldn't be that bad. He also, he concludes here by telling us that astrology doesn't use the roundness of the earth and its calculations. Yep, so he's like, either I'm wrong or astrology is bullshit, make sure I'm not. Yes.
Starting point is 01:12:56 Yes. All right, well clearly this guy needs a minute to work out his Laura Eisenhower issues. So we're gonna pause for that. But let me first give act three the hard sell Will Fucker fucker will be mother Pish Fucker can son of a big
Starting point is 01:13:17 Fucker piece of shit Find out the answer to these questions and more when we return for these somehow less coherent conclusion of level Find out the answer to these questions and more when we return for these somehow less coherent conclusion of but level Lulu Lulu doing skeptic stuff skeptic stuff is my favorite stuff. Hey Marsh. What's up to do? Hey, hey Marsh What's going on? Oh, hey Noah. Hey, Heath. I'm just sending back this stuff that I ordered But using the mail can be such a pain. Oh, why don't you try Stamps.com. What's stamps.com? Stamps.com brings all the services of the US Postal Service right to your home computer and printer.
Starting point is 01:13:50 I used it to send the insurance claims last year when I got my van scraped. Did someone say, man, skate? No, no, I said, van scraped. Just go back, just go back. No, I'm not. I'm not.
Starting point is 01:14:01 I'm not. I'm not. Not so fast. We'll dash your missile. what are you doing here? You should know better than to cast a shadow on these land, Stark One. The podcast versus a neutral zone. The high council won't stand for this. The high council is dead, Dark One.
Starting point is 01:14:17 And soon you shall join them. The blade of Orrin Ra, how? I have done many things for Blood Man, Scape Man, and I am about to do one more. YAH! YAH! YAH! YAH! YAH!
Starting point is 01:14:34 YAH! YAH! YAH! YAH! YAH! YAH! YAH! YAH!
Starting point is 01:14:42 YAH! YAH! Do you guys get paid for these ads? Almost never. Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, if you're watching this, it means you're either a child fascinated by space. Or, you're a full grown adult whose unchecked mental illness has them trolling through all available NASA footage in the hopes of catching us in the act of manufacturing a worldwide conspiracy to deny God and funnel money to Satan worshipping Jews. So today we're going to be learning about Venus, the brightest planet in the Earth's sky. But that's not all.
Starting point is 01:15:28 We'll also be learning about the effects of the social internet on the spread of misinformation, as every syllable, frame, and image we show is slowly dissected by the intellectual versions of a societal cancer. So get on board the spaceship curiosity and let's explore. Also please don't kill your girlfriend and children before yourself. That's the one thing we're asking. Just do you only. Suicide murder, not murder suicide.
Starting point is 01:15:57 And we're back for still more of this shit and we're going to rejoin the action on some video shot from a plane of a mountain that wouldn't be visible if the earth was round trust us on that one. This is just an argument from some guy unknown filmed some mountain unknown. That's the level of argument where I hear. Well, no, no, no, there are clouds in that video and near that mountain is very convincing. It's definitely the mountain they say. Do they not know about planes being pretty high up a lot of the time?
Starting point is 01:16:30 Nope. No, I feel like they think they're ballpark on the ground. There's no way that they know about planes. Otherwise, they wouldn't be flat. Yeah. That is, that is true. I mean, bear in mind, they, they believe first and foremost, the evidence of their own perception and most of the time that they see plans, they're on the ground as they
Starting point is 01:16:50 get in them. That's true. And then they get out in the ground. So like, that's just evidence. Right. Okay, but if this, if this was the case, if there were mountains that you can see, but you shouldn't be able to, if the hoax was real about throughout earth. That would be caught a lot.
Starting point is 01:17:07 So like they think we forgot to blur out that mountain during that. Yeah, right. Like normally blurring them when relevant relative to the distance from the plane. Exactly. Like what the fuck do they think is happening? Well, and that's the big fucking thing is that if this was the case you wouldn't need this video every single person who'd ever been on a plane on a day that wasn't cloudy would have this evidence would have seen the rest of the right
Starting point is 01:17:37 hey you join your first plane ride, Billy. Yeah. Is that the great wall of China? Yeah. It is. So weird that we can see it from here right over there. Yeah. He's like, he says at one point that, oh, this is where they explain how shit really hit the fan when flat earthers discovered zooming in.
Starting point is 01:17:57 Oh, right. Fuck, are they right about that? Jesus Christ. The Nikon P 900 is the only thing flat earth has agree on and they never stop talking about it. You can't talk to that earth for more than 10 minutes without bringing up a fucking Nikon P900. But it looks you can zoom all the way in. See that boat disappearing over the horizon? I zoom all the way in. Oh, I can see it now. I mean, yes, it's made out of wobbly lines as if it's distorted by some sort of optical illusion. But from that,
Starting point is 01:18:24 we can just learn that the further things get away, the wobbly of their lines gets. Right. Yeah, they're wobbly or they become. That's your science. Yeah. Okay. But after like 900 or whatever that stands for, it does not be, it's not, right, it's
Starting point is 01:18:38 can't be visible forever. That's the thing is that we could zoom in and also watch it go over the fucking her life who is flat. You wouldn't be visible forever on everything. Yeah, they've, they've never done that. What they do is they was to me disappear, zoom in and go, ah, how I can see it. And then they turn their cameras off. They don't stay there watching it disappear.
Starting point is 01:18:58 Zubar. I need to do a harder. They seem to think that like when an invention happens, then a pistomology change. Like when Newton discovered that before that, it was just the buoyancy and whatever. But then some of us had gravity because he found it. Right. And then when we found the nine hundred or whatever, then we could zoom. So it's like it's the fucking Wiley Coyote school of knowledge.
Starting point is 01:19:28 Yeah, everyone caught gravity the way we all caught the Omicron variant. I think that's it. Yeah. And also who is this guy who's talking now? He didn't get a fucking Kyron. He doesn't rise to the level of fucking Nazi rap artist slash Astro economist or something. Who is this? No, he must have failed at that.
Starting point is 01:19:46 And then it's going to be a marathon. But he does have a wall of hats behind him. And I never wanted a house to burn down more. Yeah. In my entire life. Yeah. He's got a wall of baseball cups like that fucking hunting trophies. Like he's killed a lot of girls.
Starting point is 01:20:04 He's mounted them. Honestly, well he's killed a lot of girls. I mean, I'm gonna say, well, honestly, that's the way, yeah, that's if you're displaying it for that reason, and that reason alone entirely reason on his other wall, though, is the exact same flat-earth poster is that is on the wall behind me right now, which I got really excited, but I've got that poster. It's on my wall behind me. It mines in a nicer frame, obviously, but I'm not in the poster but there's some amazing next level platitude shit that goes on here too. Right, Wasters, thank you. All the other flat earthers. This is an actual quote. He says, every flat earther has played their part and we wouldn't
Starting point is 01:20:36 be where we are if it wasn't for you. Yeah, I mean, God, I hear it, too. Yeah, it's very zealous. So, I'm doing a cameo that they've not bothered reading ahead of time. It's like, yeah, I really like what you're doing. And if you weren't doing the thing that you're doing, we wouldn't be right now where we are or aren't. It wouldn't be done. Also, in case you're worried that this guy who collects monster energy hats is sexist, don't worry, he shouts out the guys and also the wonderful. Yes, right.
Starting point is 01:21:09 Exactly. Exactly. In quality. Okay, but he's saying that like they're all working together doing their part to make the flat earth happen. Right. Like he says, everybody's just picking up the slack in their quadrant. They bring it together and then the earth is flat because we all, but scientific theories
Starting point is 01:21:27 aren't supposed to have like a hard working zone defense. That's not Jim Bayheim doesn't run science for that's crazy. Yeah. He also says that flat earth proofs are coming out all of the time, which is why 90% of every debate's arguments are taken from a pamphlet written in 1881 by a snake oil salesman in a sex cult. Samuel Roboffen, the images they show us, the diagrams they show us are 140 years old. That's the one that's showing us in this movie. They're coming out and when he wrote that, when he said that, I wrote my nose and I'm like, why wouldn't you show any
Starting point is 01:22:00 of them to us that van come on. And just when you're thinking, wow, it's weird how every single commercial airline pilot is in on this scam. They explain that a lot of pilots aren't in on the scam actually. Oh, okay. Look, let's be real. And I don't want to insult anybody here, but pilots are the eighth dumbest profession. No, they're okay. They're handsome. They dress up like a sex toy from the 60s and they don't fly the plane for 98. You really want to rank professions when we're podcasting. We share a profession with Joe Goddamn, Rogan Eli. Don't open that fucking door.
Starting point is 01:22:35 I didn't say we ranked higher. I'm just saying that if you're going to do a general survey. So yeah, so we get this montage of them bothering pilots and hey, like when you fly a plane, can you see how round Earth is? And they're like, no, you fucking idiot. Yeah, I couldn't see any signs of gravity either. I couldn't see the gravity moving up to meet me or whatever. So that's probably fake.
Starting point is 01:23:01 What? And a lot of these pilots have got a very kind of, I've let you in the cockpit, and now I've just realized you're a crazy person vibe. That's what they've got his, I'm just gonna say yes until you don't get out of box culture and take over this plane. I'm just trying deescalate letting you in here. Oh, it's getting late.
Starting point is 01:23:19 I gotta get back to the cockpit. This is much like NASA educational videos. They are viewed, cockpits are viewed by two kinds of people, curious children and crazy people. Well, and then there's this amazing moment where they're like, and if you don't believe us, just look at this flight manual that the government produces that says the earth is flat and doesn't rotate. And I'm like, guys, crop out the part where it says simplifying
Starting point is 01:23:46 assumptions over that list. Okay. Says it right. Yeah. Also crop out the other simplifying assumptions, which include that your plane has no, you have to assume your plane has no turbines and that wind is constant. So does does EricBae think those things are true? Two that planes don't have engines and that wind is coming. Wind gusts are a Jewish conspiracy. It proves that everything is exactly 273 Kelvin and one atmosphere at all times. There are two dimensions in the universe. This led me to a worrying truth that was not flat earth, which is how many pilots had to crash into the ground, going, shy, I was accounting for roundness before they put this into the video.
Starting point is 01:24:32 How does it support my point about the profession? That's all I'm saying. I thought I would just kind of roll into it because you land on a ball, right? You just softly, you can't hurt yourself on a ball. And then we get the saddest fucking thing in the entire video in my mind, which is some dude taking this, those simplifying assumptions to like some fucking school board meeting or something. This is the best. Yeah. He's like, who do I give my evidence to? And you can see the guy be like, the garbage, you can put it in the garbage.
Starting point is 01:25:08 He's like, Larry can throw it away for you, man. Give it to Larry and Larry's like, dude, fuck you. Okay, fuck you, Kyle. But honestly, if the rest of the movie had just been those two guys rolling around on the ground. Oh, God. This is the guy shouting in a public meeting about his PDF and he wants a law past that bans the teaching that the earth is round and a road map how stupid is oh and
Starting point is 01:25:32 Lord and Florida just passed it. Florida is like that. That's right. Oh, she has become law and Florida. God, and he finishes his dumb rant and you see all these people at this town meeting who clearly by like law had to let him talk for however many minutes. Yep. So he finishes talking and there's like a little bit of silence and they're like, oh he's
Starting point is 01:25:51 done. And then all of them look up from clearly the candy crush that they've been. Any other new business? Yeah. Oh, that's great. Yeah. Well, you guys see my fish tanks? Look at how many fish tanks I have. Yes.
Starting point is 01:26:05 Oh, and then this is also where they explain to us that satellites, which they describe as the narrator calls, quote, those magical orbiting aluminum tin cans. Okay, genuinely, do they think satellites exist, but are floating on balloons? Yes. Or do they think they don't exist? No, because they make both of those points. They believe, first of all, they believe that you have to modify tin cans with aluminum sometimes, but also, yes, they believe that satellites are actually just on balloons the
Starting point is 01:26:40 whole time. Yeah. That's how they get them swell pictures. Well, the ones that don't disappear in the Bimu to triangle. Well, yeah, right, right. It is all of their shit right into the interdimensional portal that is. Yeah. I was honestly like if they had started arguing that they were trying to like beat back the Kaiju with their rockets this whole time.
Starting point is 01:27:06 I would have been zero percent surprised. I would have been like, well, yeah, I figured after the moon landing, that was the next logical step. No, you have to drift with somebody to be in the same robot to beat up a Kaiju. You have to, it's a psychic connection. It's really important. He says NASA is the largest consumer of helium for obvious reasons. And I was like, is it, is it because everything's a balloon? Yes. It is. It is. They, they, he think in his
Starting point is 01:27:34 head in 1971, someone was like, you know, we got started, you know, you guys, we got to buy like eight, put a million poundsoleum a year because I'm exhausted. Oh, that's what satellite. The thing is they say that they have this thing about all the satellites that crash have got balloons on them. And therefore he assumed that all satellites are on balloons. And that's the same as arguing that airplanes don't exist because hot air balloons do. Right.
Starting point is 01:28:02 That is their argument. Well, yeah, so to be clear, NASA uses fucking balloons for a lot of shit because you can get into the like low earth orbit, fucking levels pretty easily, relatively easy with a giant balloon compared to trying to launch the shit up into space. So if all you need to do is go up there, check some temperature, check some radiation, readings or something like that. That's the way to go. So they have this lady that works on NASA's balloon program and they're like see NASA has balloons. QE mother fucking tea. Can I can I just say there is nothing more heartbreaking in this entire documentary than this poor balloon lady because you know the balloon. They're at the bottom of the totem bullet NASA, right?
Starting point is 01:28:42 They're not launching any rocket her excitement and enthusiasm is the most heartbreaking thing of this entire documentary. She was like, finally, did you see someone bought the footage of me talking about our balloon work? Did you hear that Dave and Dave was like, oh, but I keep blowing Susan. And then showed up on this, not balloon science. Okay.
Starting point is 01:29:02 Okay. You're saying, notice how you had never seen satellites from the Earth and I'm like, you could be showing a video of anything except a satellite from the Earth right now and you're not. I see satellites from the Earth all the bucket. I have a little thing on my phone that tells me which satellite I just saw coming by.
Starting point is 01:29:24 Yup. Like, my guy, look, there's so many like, hey, you could easily disprove your entire worldview, but like, that's like $60 at your local museum. Man, this is fucking Christ. You showing us a clip of balloon fight now? Yeah. Did you think that, is that proven something? That Mario 64 battleboat? And then we had downer, I guess across you know, I'll be open minded to Antarctica. And they openly wonder why nobody will let
Starting point is 01:29:53 a bunch of random YouTubers walk around Antarctica and see if there's an edge. I am 100% okay with the people who made this movie, exploring and I'm up to you. If that's actually a law, I will fight it for now. We need to get rid of that law. I am their ACLU and they are my KKKK. They absolutely can explore Antarctica. That was 4K, it's not, that's not a racist story.
Starting point is 01:30:19 It's just very morally exchanged. Or I'm gonna say how much I love that potassium. So yeah, and of course this is, and every fucking flat earth documentary has to eventually pull out this footage of Admiral Richard Bird saying that Antarctica would be worth exploring because there's probably a lot of good shit there, right? Yeah. He's saying, I'm talking to his big. No one's disagreeing the I'm talking to his big. No, no one's disagreeing with that. Nope. And then they're like, he's like, you know,
Starting point is 01:30:48 we should really explore and see if there's great resources and they're like, why didn't we ever do that? We did ever do that. They're still doing that. There's people doing that right now. I mean, admittedly, the research these days is a lot sadder and it's a lot more day after tomorrow. We then we'd like it to be, but how big is it really?
Starting point is 01:31:08 Is it really big? It's really big. Are we sure? Yeah, it's as big as North America. Yeah. You can go with me. Right, right. It's helping out.
Starting point is 01:31:16 Okay. He's the extra king. That's why it's not surprising. Admiral Bird said, we saw Landver, the size of North America. And people are like, there's Landver, the size of North America. And people are like, there's Land there, the size of North America is it? Yeah, it's called Antarctica. We know it exists. It's on your fucking, no, surprising to us. I don't know. Show me an upside down penguin. Right. Yeah. I'm saying. I'm saying, I'm penguin. So and then, okay, at this point,
Starting point is 01:31:40 I did not think it was possible to meet my favorite talking head in this movie, right? I couldn't imagine that he was yet to come. He was. This is where we go to. We had to dial a status to meet Tanner Stewart, entrepreneur slash self made millionaire. Entrepreneurs. Oh my God.
Starting point is 01:32:01 Entrepreneurs. Is it any job title as bullshit as entrepreneur? It's from the French words, no, ontra meaning to come in and prondra meaning to take stuff. You know, can you think of anybody else who finds it definition comes in and take stuff? We've got words for that. He's a between-taker.
Starting point is 01:32:16 They do the saddest little pan over like his quote unquote bling. And it's just like a nice car and about. Yep. Mm-hmm. Yeah. It's like a hillbilly crib. Is this what we're watching here at this point? Yeah, exactly. Right. And then he's gonna explain it to us right?
Starting point is 01:32:31 Because he says, well, people who are stupid, fuck, liniets when they find out I'm a flat earth or say, well, why don't you just go to the edge of the earth and jump off? And let me see if I can explain it to you stupid, fucking idiot head poop, poop brains. I was so excited at this moment. I was like, is he gonna try to go find the head?
Starting point is 01:32:48 He's gonna walk to something? This is amazing. And he starts doing this whole thing where it's like, all right, well, let's try. Imagine all of this pond is the water, all the water in the world. And you can't follow up the edge of that, can you? And I'm like, right, because it's not like a finite flat object, but if it was, and then he starts to realize that his analogy isn't working, but he's already out there by his pond, so he has to kind of rethink it out loud.
Starting point is 01:33:16 And then he's like, because there's a wall, right? Like this pond. Oh, he went too far to swim back. He went past half. Yeah, right. Yeah, exactly. He's literally at the edge of a pond describing how ponds don't have it. Yes. Yes. Yes. You see how I'm soaking wet right now? Yeah. And he's talking about the edge. He's saying there's no edge there.
Starting point is 01:33:38 And his visual is the edge of the pond. And he's saying there's nothing beyond that. There's no water beyond it. It's like there's no water beyond it. But like look it up on. There's grass beyond it and then there's Texas beyond it and then beyond that there's America and if you keep going far enough, there's your fucking pond again, mate. But then ultimately we get to the end of it and the answer to the whole, why don't you go off the, you know, go to the edge of the earth and jump up is yeah we should do that.
Starting point is 01:34:06 Yeah, but you do you made me imagine that that pond was all the fucking water in the earth for nothing your answer was sure yeah for nothing well to be fair. Pass the edge of the earth is where star wars and star trek are yeah they are both true okay but more importantly. More importantly pass the edge of the earth is where his dog is taking a shit oh really i. track are. Yeah, they all both true. Okay, but more importantly, more importantly, past the edge of the earth is where his dog is taking a shit. Oh, really? I took a giant. Yeah, he's talking to me. Shit and frame, which is very funny. Oh, it's just on the bus. And the dogs take you along like aggressive, difficult shit. Yeah, goes up and down a couple
Starting point is 01:34:43 to it's yeah. Yeah. It goes up and down a couple of the things that fucking greatest. Too much people food shit for sure. Yeah, he gets down on what he is like beyond the edge of the earth. That's where Star Wars is and it's real. I'm shitting right in the frame. The dog might as well interrupt like that. Sorry.
Starting point is 01:34:57 It's so good. He literally says, what if you could have your Star Wars and your Star Trek too? Right. And I'm like, that's the JJ Abrams reboot dumbass. We've already had that. This a bit as well. He talks when he's talking about the pond and all the water he says, water must be contained. And it cuts to his three consecutive hot tubs as an illustration of the water being contained. And I thought my theory at this point was he's trying to sell this big house, but he's too cheap to pay for a real estate agent to come and take photos. So he's using this movie to show off the features of his house.
Starting point is 01:35:28 Right. So imagine the earth is like this brand new fitted kitchen with two ovens and a trusted kitchen island in the middle of it. Can you imagine? You know what would hold the earth in granite? You see how this rug really ties the up. Yeah, right. And then so then he's he spells out the timeline of deception for us, right? We go all the way back to 1955. That's when we did the secret operation with Admiral bird that he was just on fucking television talking about super secret. And then in 1958, they start NASA so that they can work on their quote, upper space mind control program. Sure. Would have loved more details there. Nope. That was like, that's assumed knowledge. They did that in the prequel, apparently. Okay. I think it's
Starting point is 01:36:20 just because they won't say outer space so they say upper. Oh my God, you're right. Yeah, that's true. That is a sure thing. They can't say outer because that would mean like omnidirectional. Right. So it's just the up is where space might be, but really just the fervent, dummy thing. And then they point out that in 1959, 12 nations eventually followed by 40 some odd more signed the Antarctic treaty
Starting point is 01:36:47 to say that nobody was allowed to go all the way to the edge of earth because that would fuck them right up. I will fight this. If this is real, I will fight as the heads of the earth. Absolutely, man. I want these YouTubers in Antarctica. I've read a lot of citation needed essays. I know how they said, yeah, right, right.
Starting point is 01:37:03 Just a bunch of Jewish bankers in snow forts laughing like, oh, snowmals. This is awesome. I'm really rich. Xanax lady comes on to remind us that they don't care about us. If they knew, they wouldn't tell us the truth. I'll tell her about Antarctica just so she can have somewhere to store her eyebrow pencil. There you go. And then we go back to the entrepreneur guy. He now has a backwards baseball cap on in case you didn't hate him enough because he's a man of the people. Right.
Starting point is 01:37:32 And he explains his $200,000, prove the earth is round challenge. Now at first, you might think that he's committing to giving a fifth of a million dollars to the first person to prove the earth is round. He knows better than that. His challenge is that you have to make water stick to the bottom of a spinning ball, like it would have to on earth on the bottom of earth. That is. But but then he shows a video of show when demonstrating that and he's like, but not like
Starting point is 01:38:04 that. Yeah, right. He actually shows he's like, you can't make a water stick the bottom ball while it's spinning. Here's a video. We tried for a fucking while you cannot look at it. This is just a really short clip, but we were like so long. We tried as you can do it.
Starting point is 01:38:22 That was my year. And then and then he says he has a challenge for Neil deGrasse Tyson personally. We're going to spend essentially the rest of the movie with all the various people saying, and you know what else is fat on North noted grass station is asked his ass is fat. That's it's it gets real fucking weird. Right? Yeah. It's like you guys all felt this movie shift from like, here's our flatter documentary to like, I personally would like to fist fight Neil and Greg Stuyson.
Starting point is 01:38:52 Yeah, like the next three or a few minutes is just like a roast of Neil deGrasse Tyson. And to be honest, if they wanted ammo, we could have probably suggested a few things they didn't go by. Yeah. It's so good. Clearly the entire cast just all ended up scream crying angry at Neil DeGrasse Tyson during
Starting point is 01:39:12 their filming and it worked as a closing montage where they like right. No, he's like, oh, we got ourselves a montage. If Neil DeGrasse Tyson is so confident, why won't he debate Eric Dubet at which point I immediately wrote my notes? Marsh, you have to debate Eric Dubet. So I tried and he refused. That's the thing about this. Yeah, I've invited Eric Dubet to be visible on multiple occasions. He's not done it. What is he hiding? If you were to tune into his rap albums, you'd get a bit of a clue as to what he's on. Yeah. Dave Murphy as well is complaining. He said, Dave Murphy says, I sent Neil deGrasse
Starting point is 01:39:49 Tyson some questions. And he refused to answer, which is interesting, because when I invited him on Beebe's, and he said, I'm not interested in speaking with you and aiding in your collaboration with the criminal establishment, because that will make you collaborative. So why did he refuse to answer my questions, Dave Murphy? Clearly part of the big disc. Ah, look, no, I know we don't have debates on scathing atheists. Nope. But could we just place select clips of the debate? So and then we see like Neil deGrasse Tyson on Joe Rogan on their like, yeah, man, we try to get you on to debate one of these flat earth guys. And he's like, yeah, and I told you to go fuck yourself in there. They're like, yeah, you sure, you sure did. And I'm like, you know, he doesn't always get the answer right.
Starting point is 01:40:32 That's the right answer, right? Yeah. But of course, according to this movie, it's because NASA was afraid to let Neil disgrace Tyson debate Eric to Bay because they knew that Eric Dubay would mop the fucking floor with him. Yeah, even in a 15 minute, a 50 said he'd just give him 15 minutes. I thought, yeah, because I've talked to a lot of flat earthers. And the one thing I know that universally value is brevity. They'll just take 15 minutes and they'll be happy. They won't go along that's why we're watching a now along video. I would love
Starting point is 01:41:06 of an actual 15 minute debate. Just like, no, because it's flat. It is. Do you explain clouds? The end. Here's an upside down penguin. I, yes, this is also the only time we get a clip of what Eric Dubay looks like and they try to make him look badass, but he looks like Voldemort's sad goth sun. Just really sad little black lights. Yeah, yeah, he's a Matthew McConaughey in season one of true detective, but somehow mullsill. Yes. Well, and okay, normally I would say, and that's the end, but the credits of this movie are so delightful because this is the first time where we really get to hear ODD TV go
Starting point is 01:41:53 off on his rap. So all of us just kept taking fucking notes. His rap song introduces the flat earth crew. Yes. Yeah. And they're all fucking crazy people. So it's like, there's my friend Nick. He's a real schizophrenic.
Starting point is 01:42:08 And then there is Ashley, she's going through a lot right now. It does, but like the way they rap all the names, it's like the bit in the middle of one of the by the spice girls. Yes, we got Dave in the place and he don't believe in space. It's basically not all the way. Yep. Very much so. It's so you home. Yep. Very much so. It's okay. He wraps like a metronome is gonna punch him at a moment and he's not
Starting point is 01:42:31 going to win. It's gonna happen. But like a metronome is gonna throw something in his face every so often. If he doesn't, and he's only learned quarter notes, like he doesn't know. Yes. A triplets or a 16th. Not yet. He's learning the notes one at a time. If me dancing was a rat, yeah, it's worse than that.
Starting point is 01:42:49 I understand that Mr. Dubay is an interested in debating Marsh, but if he is willing, ODD, I would like to challenge you to a rat battle. It's not against me, not against me, but against Boba Brinkman. Oh, there you go. We will. I don't think that I would not do that to Bob a breakman. He's Canadian. He'll say yes.
Starting point is 01:43:12 All right. Well, Mars, thank you so much for sharing your fucking weird ass expertise. I can't sleep. It's my pleasure. Absolutely. My pleasure. I would have been so disappointed if we had to do this one without you. I'm glad you could be on. And of course, be sure to check the show notes for links to some of Mars's my pleasure. Absolutely my pleasure. I would have been so disappointed if we had to do this one without you I'm glad you could be on and of course be sure to check the show notes for links to some of Marsha's other projects Hopefully an upcoming interview with bleep bleep bleepie face over there and while that does it for our review a level
Starting point is 01:43:35 That's not gonna do it for the episode just yet because we still need to channelize you back next week So Eli tell us what's on deck? Well, Noah sometimes the answers to the tactics of the devil or the love of Christ, sometimes it's faith, but sometimes it's just straight up kicking their asses. So we'll be watching the sixth day starring Arnold Schwarzenegger. Oh, it's almost like I'm going to be at a convention that weekend. Okay. So, so with that to look forward to, we're going to bring up a 3 so 341 to a merciful close once again a huge thanks to all the patreon I don't know how to make the show go if you think you got yourself among their ranks You can make a prep episode donation a patreon.com slash God off on there by earning the way access to an ad free version of our
Starting point is 01:44:13 episode You can also help a ton by leaving a five star review and by sharing the show on all your various social media platforms And if enjoyed this show be sure to check out our sibling shows the skating a the citation to D&D minus and the skeptic Available wherever podcast live if you have questions comments or cinematic suggestions You can go out off and move to gmail.com, legal services for this podcast. You can probably find out if it's a P. Android Tourist, Tim Robbins, and takes care of our social media.
Starting point is 01:44:30 And our theme site was written and performed by Ryan Slotnik, we will address our Mars, although the music was written and performed by our audio engineer Morgan Clark, and was used with permission. Thanks again for giving us a check your life this week. For Heathen, write me a light positive comment on all the illusions promised to work hard or another chunk next week until then.
Starting point is 01:44:41 We'll leave you with a breakfast club close. another chunk next week until then. We'll leave you with a breakfast club close. Eric DuBay is a Nazi, rhombus, the shape, and he's afraid to debate and prove otherwise. He lies that the rest of his life lobbying international bodies to let these assholes lead an Antarctic expedition. Oh yeah. The editor realized that the beliefs in Santa Spanacci's rant actually spelled out Jewish conspiracy in Morse code Marsh refused to debate Eric Du Bay at QD this year so we could trick him on stage and dump a bucket of people
Starting point is 01:45:18 Open invitation Eric Du Bay. Oh Oh, yeah!

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