Goes Without Saying - growing-up & "new chapter" anxiety: podmas #7

Episode Date: December 19, 2022

on the 7th day of podmas sephy & wing gave to me... chaos incoherence on ageing, graduating and rejecting societal pressure.join the conversation every monday.shop our merch: sephyandwing.co.ukcom...e and chat in our book club.speak your mind on the @sephyandwing instagram. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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Starting point is 00:00:49 The animal kingdom is queer and we are a part. Find a field guide to gay animals on Spotify, Apple. Or wherever you get your podcasts. ACAST helps creators launch, grow, and monetize their podcasts everywhere. Acast.com Take one. I need to burp immediately. I just did. When we were saying three, two, I was like one.
Starting point is 00:01:18 No, I literally, I had to go silent. Because I needed to, but I thought I'd do it off the podcast. Guys, Mary Poppins. She's being pretty rude right now someone had no manners no class um welcome to podmas on the seventh day of over halfway that's mad i love how we haven't still thought of like one gift it's like we've had seven goes to be like, what they gave to me. It's like.
Starting point is 00:01:46 I think the consistency was the one and only gift. I just would. I think that's, who knew? No one would have put that on their list. I think the consistency, have we or have we not pulled it out the bag so far? I can't believe it. Today's one might be a bit late
Starting point is 00:02:02 because I think I'm going to go and buy a turkey. But apart from that, I think the consistency has actually been a really nice i think show for ourselves of this is the energy that we want to take into a new chapter shall we say that's amazing are you feeling a bit anxious about starting a new chapter have you got maybe would you call it new chapter anxiety some may say what about you are you feeling the new chapter anxiety i'm not feeling it yet but i know i'm going to i'm having the anxiety about the new chapter anxiety yeah yeah getting a little better with it but i know that it's coming um because you're going
Starting point is 00:02:36 through big changes right my chapter has started i mean oh my fuck can i tell you about yesterday yeah the fucking situation it was no just oh my fuck my life has crashed yeah oh my god yeah i feel it it was absolutely horrific so my new chapter went started with an absolute flop as it always does i had a van booked to move all my stuff back back from london i'm starting my new fucking chapter yeah 2023 is my year of fun i can't afford rent then in that year so i've got to be able to afford priorities uh-huh and fun things so i had a van booked i was gonna move all my stuff back from london to my house in oxfordshire with my family sunday it was raining i was hungover i had a fun night before it was maybe too much fun maybe too much fun i had a good
Starting point is 00:03:25 night but we keep hinting at like quite embarrassing thing it's quite embarrassing to not say anything but i also just think look and she's having that's all you need to know she's having fun but but then the fun abruptly stopped because i was waiting so it's supposed to arrive between 11 and 2 it was about 1 and i thought that the tracking link wasn't working and i was like this is a bit weird like surely there's supposed to be a tracking link by now um it was like we can't assign you a driver i phoned up any van i'm gonna call them out because they fucked me off so much yeah actually ruined my i was gonna say let's not be dramatic day yeah yeah maybe fucking on hold for ages the guy was like oh sorry it's not looking good actually i don't think we're gonna be able to find you one today
Starting point is 00:04:04 and i was like there's someone moving into my room tonight in fact she's already here i need to be out of this house yeah yeah you need to get me out of here like i can't obviously just have all my stuff here and also like there's far too much to fit in a car it's you did say also quite impressively that you'd had it booked for weeks months i'd had it booked for a month this day so what do you mean you can't find me a driver yeah it was the world cup final which makes me think the people with vans they were watching it i'm thinking it's like men that drive these vans in my day and just in my way they're men with ven they're men with ven and i'm sure they want to watch the world cup final that was my thinking with ven that's from peep show did you know yeah yeah yeah but i thought you just thought you came up with that i was like no no that's
Starting point is 00:04:50 from peep show yeah um so then on hold for ages he kept fucking going through departments he said at one point i'm standing behind the people right now they're trying and they're working tirelessly it's like can i have a word with them really like um he's on the what's it called the death star stop referencing star wars references i'd rather reference star wars than peep show yeah same peep show i know i agree which one's less cool um oh no they both they both have their flaws it's the straight white male audience that ruins it for both of them well i almost think something i always think is a red flag of people reference and i think this show like has its place it's funny in places um when when a boy references always sunny i think that's
Starting point is 00:05:36 a bit of a red flag okay it's just a bit like it's got the peep show energy even though i love peep show he thinks he's funny yeah it's just not good well like right so this van got got cancelled did it van got cancelled he was like look it's not it's not coming and the guy on the phone the annoying thing he was like nobody's coming harry and truly no one was coming i'm just here with like loads of stuff um he goes without saying nobody's coming harry you're gonna have to go boss your way out of here it was depressing and then the annoying thing that he said on the phone he was like i know it're gonna have to go boss your way out of here it was depressing and then the annoying thing that he said on the phone he was like i know it's gonna be really hard but try just try and have a good day and i was like well i'm not going to am i why is that so the sentiment of this
Starting point is 00:06:15 podcast guys i know it's gonna be really hard i know it's really hard but just go and have a hot chocolate just do one thing just have a The least you can do is enjoy it. Just devil snare, you'll relax into it. Devil snare, devil snare. So he fucked me right off. And so I was just, I was like, what the hell am I going to do? Obviously phoned my mum crying, being like, I don't know what to do. And she has saved the day.
Starting point is 00:06:39 She was like. She has. She was ill as well. The flu's going around. Right. Second reference. That's two. That's second point now if you didn't know guys i'm holding sephie to a tally she's now got one mark against
Starting point is 00:06:49 her name left and i'm gonna she can mention this illness yeah and you have to use it well i will i will use it otherwise there will be consequences that i'll think of in my own time um so she came to london which was fucking crazy and nice of her late in the day as well about five um drove the whole way we packed in the car with as much we could but i've had to leave like a mattress in the house a bed frame and like if anyone in the area needs a mattress well no i'm gonna have to go back and get them i can't leave these girls with this fucking mattress yeah yeah um so i'm gonna have to go in the next few days but honestly obviously i got a full refund from any van but it's just like are you joking yeah it's not enough you fucked me over they did and hard
Starting point is 00:07:28 when um when a new chapter starts almost like don't you find when you're thrown into something and it kind of feels like oh thrown in the deep end it's hard then to gain back the momentum that you've lost it wasn't like a smooth right everything went well like oh it was just the biggest nightmare ever it was just a day of like waiting and waiting and thank god thank god my mum could come and help me because it was i don't know what i would have done if it wasn't for her like i literally don't know i would have had to like sleep in the hallway or something for these poor girls i'd have to sleep on the sofa but it's like you don't live here anymore you don't yeah it's not good it's not good it's just it's stress that you don't need in your life you don't deserve that stress it wasn't
Starting point is 00:08:12 great but it all has worked out and like most of my stuff is here now i'm still in chaos but like i'm just when are we not yeah i don't i don't feel bad that bad in in some kinds of chaos i can when you can make it fun yeah yeah. Yeah, yeah. I was going to say, your birthday's at the end of the year. 27th. It's coming right up. It's coming up. Do you think that adds to the vibe of, like, closing chapters at the end of the year, moving into, like, a new space?
Starting point is 00:08:36 It has to, yeah. Because I get my new year and my new age at the same time. Yeah, it's quite nice. I receive them. Yeah, it's quite fun. I get kind of knighted as a 26 year old yeah yeah because it's almost like this is the year of 2023 and it's also your year of being 26 yeah it's quite like i get my it's all quite neat what are your thoughts on your year
Starting point is 00:08:55 of being 26 it's the year of fun hopefully your year of fun yeah and that's it i definitely feel i'm aware of this um term late 20s creeping in which i don't love been made aware of the term do you feel like that as a 26 year old that can shine some light on it i'm in two minds about it i i'm every day feeling the impending doom of my worthlessness as an aging woman 100 that we're just in decline yeah constantly declining and there's nothing i can do about i'm free falling against my will um exactly whilst the men are just glowing up year on year oh they're looking great yeah um but i i do think i had this at 23 and i think i'm having it again now where i keep thinking i think i was born to be 26. That is amazing. Like when I was 23, I was like, whoa, 23 is really my year, my Jordan year.
Starting point is 00:09:48 This is really my year. Yeah. And now maybe it's the 23 again that I'm going to be, that I'm 26 in 2023. But I'm like, I think I was born to be 26. That sounds really nice. And it's a load of bollocks. Like nothing's happened. Oh, I just got a notification it's
Starting point is 00:10:06 for the fear of god in me something about taylor swift era's tour i saw the emails i literally saw your face freeze that's giving me anxiety of a new chapter anxiety i'm like i need to be there and i don't know what i can do taylor if you're listening what happened with these tickets i saw the statement that started with i don't it goes sighting yeah it goes people sending it to us which was honestly my life completed i don't even want to talk about it basically i'm scared about that anyway i feel like i was born to be 26 which obviously is fake like that's not even real it's just my perception like no it's actually like objectively like it's stupid yeah it's like it's almost like that is just a passing thought that you said out loud now but i'm holding on to it and it's actually helping me out
Starting point is 00:10:49 really getting me through my days um sometimes the mindset is everything not all the time but i think all the time no there are some things that are objectively shit there are you know what i mean yeah no no but i do think like in the just like a neutral day you have some control so much power i think just on your day of like whether that like for example even yesterday everything going fucking badly you can either view it as the way i viewed it my life is falling apart the van has failed and that means everything has failed you can't even book a fucking van like everything's gone wrong you have to phone your mum to come and help blah blah blah just nightmare like sort it out or like the new chapter's done like you fucked it before you've
Starting point is 00:11:36 even started it um or you can view it which i was kind of doing as well of like thank god my mum could come and help this like i've got most of my stuff out of here like you this is life like there's the fun chaos of life all of the stuff and it's like you have the option really to like change things with your perception sometimes when things go wrong i actually really like it do it depends it really depends but i think sometimes when nothing's going wrong in life it allows all of the shit in my brain to just like take over yeah and just create its own mess whereas like when there's actually a mess and i've had it before like in group situations where something will go wrong and all of a sudden i'm the one holding us together and i
Starting point is 00:12:15 think i'm in bed crying every day and yet look at us who'd have thought look at us why am i so um comfortable in mess it's like yeah because you're preparing yourself every day for mess and stressful situations like don't you find like sometimes when things actually go wrong it's kind of not as bad as you thought it would be so you end up feeling pretty capable yeah i kind of think that almost i can't i think it's a similar thing i almost had a thought like a few years ago that's kind of been a recurring thing like you will always be stressed about something there will always be a worry so almost yeah you could be lying in bed on the perfect day relaxing away um and suddenly it's like oh now i need a wee so you're gonna do you're gonna have a wee and then you get back into bed it's like but now i
Starting point is 00:12:59 want a cup of tea okay you get a cup of tea you always kind of be like there's always a thing to do but you haven't done your homework whatever like whatever it is oh shit my rent's gotta get paid oh my fucking friends being annoying all of the stuff my socks are right yeah yeah we get it we get it we're there yeah everything is annoying but if there's actually a thing that's like i am stressed about this thing it's like suddenly you don't really need a weed that bad and a tea doesn't really it's not really on your list your socks are fine all of a sudden yeah yeah actually there's always something to worry about so if you just relax into the fact that like for example yesterday I was stressed about a van today I'm stressed about the mess that came with the yeah
Starting point is 00:13:36 the mess that's in my room the vans are relevant now yeah so there's always going to be something so you might as well relax into the fact that you're always going to be riding some kind of strata. Wendy's Small Frosty is the ultimate summer refreshment. And not because it's cool and creamy and made with fresh Canadian dairy. It's also refreshingly cheap. Just 99 cents until July 14th. It's a treat for you and your wallet. ACAS powers the world's best podcasts.
Starting point is 00:14:08 Here's a show that we recommend. Nature. I've got a gay rooster named Francois. Is so gay. These rams are gay. I'm studying gay animals. Does that mean I'm gay? So why don't more people know this?
Starting point is 00:14:26 I'm Owen Ever. I'm Lane Kaplan-Levinson, and this is a field guide to gay animals. A podcast about queerness in the natural world. The animal kingdom is queer, and we are a part. Find a field guide to gay animals on Spotify, Apple, or wherever you get your podcasts. Acast helps creators launch, grow, and monetize their podcasts. Everywhere. Acast.com This might sound like a bit negative, but can I ask you a question? Yeah. Has there ever been, like a what you would describe now with
Starting point is 00:15:06 hindsight as a chapter in your life that you were really excited for but looking back you're like that didn't go well and it was it went badly do you know what i mean that's really interesting let me actually have a think about that because i think sometimes like we have like all these hopes and expectations of what a new chapter is going to hold for us. And then when things go differently or even like quite badly or end in like a painful situation, it can be really, really devastating. And then you move into your next new chapter with loads of lessons learned and like new takeaways that you're bringing in. Yeah, I think there's been fucking loads. I almost feel like one that was kind of hard was i think
Starting point is 00:15:46 when you are moving into a new house and i'm gonna say my second year of uni house they're still like like i've lived with them first year second and third year just moved out of the house with one of them like they're still my best friends but we definitely we always talk about it there was just three of us and that was fucking hard like i think that was a big mistake for us to do that um like i think when we bought the fucking house i decided i fucking rented the house yeah in brighton south over street great stunning great fucking steep hill as steep as a hill can get in this life right at the top we thought this will be really fun we're gonna have so much fun in this house and every single one of us i think it's fair to say we all had a pretty fucking shit time there were really good
Starting point is 00:16:32 moments there and we did have a good time but i think we were all struggling in different ways and i think it's difficult to live with three people like there being three of you i think it's a tough um especially them being the people you do everything with it was before i really knew you yeah like it was incredibly intense we would argue a lot we would also do but it was just the kind of thing we'd go to uni together we'd eat together we'd chill out together we go to a party together like everything was together yeah it was far too much and i think we can all look back on that now and be like that was a mistake we should have had more people there yeah um and it was just tough and i think that actually when i think about how excited i
Starting point is 00:17:10 was to live in that house and now you know when you get a feeling it's like oh if i said the south over street house oh it gives me a feeling do you think like you know when sometimes we do the whole thing of um everything happens for a reason and like well you're going through it because you need to learn a lesson and like all of that stuff like no no but what was the lesson do you think that you got from that the lesson was i think you can get through anything with like true mates sort of thing like i genuinely think like we we really fucking all struggled that year with each other they fucking wound me up and i'm sure i wound them up and we really fucking all struggled that year with each other they fucking wound me up and i'm sure i wound them up and we all fucking struggled and it was just like oh these fuckers but actually
Starting point is 00:17:50 it's like god what a fucking funny thing that we did we just went mental in a house together for years such as you need to be honest we all turned in on each other we all like it was just we were crazy we're also living with this other there was one other guy there who we didn't really know no yeah um he didn't really do much to help he was crazy guy like he was a real techno raver i actually kind of got on with him but it wasn't the easiest situation was there a chapter for you that you think like that you look back on and just think oh that wasn't what i thought it's gonna be oh my god so many so many um but don't you think that's just life it's just you're constantly being thrown into things that are just slightly different than what you were imagining or like but like have you had a disappointing one that like oh that gives me
Starting point is 00:18:39 like a badness a badness feeling yeah but i don't know if i can delve into any um i think a big one for us was leaving uni yeah like that first year out of it was i mean we both oh my god took it to heart the thing that was hard about that was that i knew it was gonna be the worst moment of my life and then it was like it was so annoying it was like in my head i was like fuck i think it's gonna be really shit leaving uni and all the expectation on you and the adjustment and leaving brighton and like oh my god i think it's gonna be tough but hopefully i'll pull out the bag no the bag was nowhere to be seen you're stuck in it for much longer than you thought you'd be yeah but that was hard that was hard but i think if if that's a chapter that you're going to be moving into soon what
Starting point is 00:19:32 would the advice be that you would give devil's now you've got no option this is happening relax but i also think make a bit of a plan like and i don't mean a panicked plan like i don't mean don't do a master's because you want to prolong the fucking prolong kind of the working thing yeah like i or like i'm gonna go and get a job straight away and in this place i think take your time my we've spoken about this loads of really great honestly tool to have life hack we knew a girl that put in her bio after she finished uni gap year and i just we remember i remember us talking about it and being like that's fucking clever you've shaved a few years off your life yeah you've bought a year back it's absolutely she did stuff as well like i think she was
Starting point is 00:20:15 literally like training to be a lawyer like she was on like she was doing stuff but it's like you've got gap year in there so yeah lie in lie in bed. No one's going to fucking ask any questions. You're in a fucking gap year. I think as well, sometimes the classic thing that in your head, everyone's questioning you and asking things of you and judging you and putting pressure on you. And there definitely is a lot of like very real societal pressure and like bills that need to be paid. But a lot of the pressure I think comes at least for me from
Starting point is 00:20:46 myself of the expectations not being there and like just the extra layers of stress and most importantly guilt and shame the crux always the crux yeah um I almost think maybe it's just one of those things that you have to go through because I think if someone would have said to me you're putting loads of pressure on yourself remove the guilt and shame just ease into the time don't worry about it it would have just gone straight over my head i think it's almost there's nothing really that could have prepared me for that experience of just being thrown out into the world feeling like shit and nobody wants you that's i think the bit that i found hard that it's like just the sense of like on a global scale nobody wants you oh yeah yeah no no one literally no one well i remember like handing out handing out cvs to everywhere on the road that i i just moved to
Starting point is 00:21:40 london no job terrified what the fuck am i doing? And it's like, right, okay, I'm just going to hand out CVs everywhere. And you spend your whole day doing it and not a single place calls you. Even some people you hand it to and they laugh in your face. Yeah. Most of them are like, we can't take that. Like, what is this, the 80s? We don't take paper CVs. But the job I did get was actually from a CV, thank God.
Starting point is 00:22:03 It normally is, though. It's normally the job that you get is the shittest job where they're like can you start tomorrow yeah no it was like there was a reason you needed me so bad and i don't know but that yeah that's a hard feeling when it's like you've come out with almost like i graduated from uni i lived with all my friends and it's like almost like you were living the high life oh god the highest and now you're very much living the low life almost like what everyone always says like i always think this is kind of sad when people say this because i just think i don't ever want to be this person but a lot of people always say best days of your life and i'm always aware of anyone that ever claims that anyone else's years will be the best days of
Starting point is 00:22:37 their life it's just obviously projecting yeah it's like okay you don't know me but yeah you don't know what i'm gonna do in my fucking 40s yeah um and neither do i and that's why they'll be great but i do think there's this idea of like you really have left your youth like now it's like well welcome to reality the world of work but luckily we've somehow avoided that with this fucking fucking crazy thing but i just think i was terrified of like this reality world of work thing i think that's a similar um nervousness apprehension of the kind of late 20s thing that you were talking about have do you feel the pressure of the 20s like what do you think that pressure is there's
Starting point is 00:23:18 a few i think there's a few one that i've only started feeling recently we've spoken about recently the biological clock that is fucking put i hate her it's like it's enough that that's a thing can you not call it a biological clock like it's just why have you called it that i can hear it ticking um that's a new one that literally in the last three months like that's a new one that that's just that's starting the tick tick tick of that thanks thanks for that it's horrid but like also it like in the way that that doesn't do you know what's horrid about that is like it doesn't align with my life at all now so it's like i i don't want that i can't want that it just doesn't align at all with anything i want to do it would actually be a disaster but the the idea of this cock is like
Starting point is 00:24:03 what the fuck what's funny is i actually legitimately said to stephanie the other day if you were to get pregnant i would support you 110 i said i would be there for you every day yeah it's true that's really horrific like thank you so much um yeah so the biological clock is one and i would support you 100% and everyone always says i remind them of a fun aunt yeah you did say the other day as well if you're planning on making me your maid of honor don't i'd rather be godmother yeah i would you let that sort of tie so i can really see myself i can really sink my teeth into i don't ever want to be
Starting point is 00:24:46 like i just don't see myself as made of honor i just always have felt kind of under threat of being made of made of okay okay right it's just something i know that i don't want like it's almost like don't worry it's okay if you kind of because it's a great honor but it is the maid of honor the maid you're the maiden of the honor the The maiden of honours. The honourable maid. Yeah. It's just not for me. I just don't want it. It's fine. Right.
Starting point is 00:25:10 But Godmother sounds great. Okay. Biological clock. If I'm up for grabs. I don't want it, but I don't not want it. Yeah. Yeah. If you're available. Yeah, exactly.
Starting point is 00:25:16 I'll see what I've got on. Biological clock is one. Yeah. You said there are a few fears. And I think being an adult, it's like, right, you can't piss about anymore. You can't, for example, your van doesn't't arrive you can fucking cry and phone your mom you're an adult in this world i think i've seen all the old biddies on the street crying to whoever they can get i know but i think i do feel pressure about like i think i need like there are loads of ways that i feel like grow up like almost too much no one's telling me but i almost think like
Starting point is 00:25:42 yeah like a lot of my interests are like oh god is this appropriate for a 26 year old like stardew valley stardew valley like um what I'm doing on my 26th birthday I'm gonna go see the amazing new play of my neighbor Totoro which is a thing I loved when I was 10 like and it's almost like it's the thing that you said ages ago we would when people say like oh I just don't feel 26 i feel i feel 14 i feel 16 blah blah you were like i mean it's so fucking true you said but do maybe do not think that being 26 just looks different to what you thought it was and i think that's kind of it there's this idea that adults i think that adults don't like anything fun and i still like fun things yeah that's why i'm like oh god i need to grow up yeah yeah i need to grow up like you stop being happy like you don't have time for things you enjoy you know that's not important your interest and stuff like that i feel like
Starting point is 00:26:36 i've actually found that as like like over the past few years and just the older i get the more life that i live the more i'm like making a conscious effort and like decision and like going with intention to like hobbies and interests and like activities and things that i liked as a kid yeah definitely and i don't give a shit i can't care less in loads of ways i don't give a shit of course i think if we're talking about the anxiety of kind of a new fucking age even new year new chapter whatever there's definitely i think the idea of growing up is scary but is it anxiety of like being sat playing stardew valley is a bad thing to do or is it really the anxiety of i should be making something i should be contributing
Starting point is 00:27:22 to society i'm an adult and i should be do you know what i mean like i think it's not about the interest it's not contributing i feel like we contribute oh goodness more than enough you contribute i recycle i contribute but do you know what i mean like it doesn't align with the productivity of an adult that you would have in your head i don't know if it's a productivity i think it's like it doesn't align with my not even right let me actually think it's first of all goes about saying i don't want to ever be the adults that i'm seeing i don't want their behaviors i don't think they look good they don't look happy i don't want their behaviors so i think i have the thing of i know in my heart i'm never going to be someone that doesn't play stardew valley i'm never going to be someone that doesn't
Starting point is 00:28:02 like fucking scooby-doo like these are all things that i know i'm gonna like when i'm 80 but when i look around the the adults don't seem to be playing stardew valley they don't like scooby-doo they don't like any of these things they're from a different generation they're doing taxes and i know but you were born in the 90s like you're just you're a product of a completely different oh i don't know it's weird though it's it's a different it's a completely different mindset or like even like the transition between you'd meet your friends kind of they just come and they'd like come and sit on your bed like your friends are just like a chilled thing that they'll come into your bedroom and they'll lie
Starting point is 00:28:38 on your bed and all of that now it's like oh you gotta meet people for coffee i don't think that aligns with me no like i like the kind of scrapped well i think i do that's the thing i do do all of those things but i think there's a there's a stiffness to adulthood that i think really you want to reject step into i agree i agree but it's not really appropriate like if my if i walked into my parents room and like my mum and her friends were like lying on her bed i'd be like what the fuck you get on here just my new mum yeah but that's not your life but do you know any adults that do anything like i do but i think it's also about casual but i think it's about this like social norms i think like like casual meant something different in 1996 yeah to be casual and it's like you now like you could be in your bed right now and scroll through like 100 different people in their rooms on your story you went to school with them you haven't seen them
Starting point is 00:29:30 in years whatever but you know exactly where they were four hours ago in the 90s if your mum didn't see someone since school that was it she was out they were gone never heard of them and it's all like seeing your friends it would be like you would call them on their house phone or send them an email max to arrange where it's like now you've got everything literally at your fingertips the way we access each other is so different that it's like of course it's like i would come and jump in your bed but if i was 20 years older i probably wouldn't because i wouldn't have had access to your bed like that but i think like our grandparents when they were nine or like when they were fucking 15 or whatever were definitely like lying around in each other's bed also it's not that I want to get in everyone's bed like that's not really my priority yeah yeah I just think think I think times were different I don't know they might be
Starting point is 00:30:18 but I can almost just I think that friendship becomes stiffer when you're an adult kind of you go for like coffee catch-up like for yeah for catch-ups like that's the thing now people go oh do you want to go for a coffee and catch up it's like i don't want to catch up i just want to be present i find it really like it's quite that it might be really wanky to say but i just find it like there's definitely a stiffness and like a formality to like adult relationships which i really find distasteful. Distasteful is vulgar, crude. I think part of it as well is the reality of, like people are spending minimum nine to five, Monday to Friday.
Starting point is 00:30:54 Yeah. Elsewhere. So when they see one of their closest friends in two months time, they have to catch up. It's like, what's the alternative? I know, but that's life. No, I completely see it i just don't and i think i fear being a part of that being i don't i don't i really don't want
Starting point is 00:31:11 that i know there are loads of things i like that is one that it's not even i don't know that just doesn't sound good to me and when i see these kind of things i'm like oh is that what being an adult's like i do think that a big part of it is that just the ways that we interact and like civilization i think has moved into a different space definitely over the past couple years what do you think just this is a small thing i also thought the adults the adults do adults it's like we're literally yeah yeah what are your thoughts on grown-ups fashion when you're an adult like when you're grown-up woman like almost like mum fashion and all of this stuff
Starting point is 00:31:50 like or like um kind of work wear kind of a mutton dressed as lamb yeah do you not fear being that almost like yeah i don't like any of these clothes that i'm supposed to be wearing not this age but like well i'm 60 i'm supposed to dress like that no you won't be we still got 40 years you don't know what that's gonna look like I've got to cut all my hair off short I've got to wear cardigans no no it's don't worry about it why are you worrying about that for I'm not just we're talking about anxiety i mean that's one very small one i think it's time to go yeah yeah i'm happy to okay um mary podmas yeah mary podmas guys congratulations on the things to worry about but also don't really worry about them i don't know
Starting point is 00:32:38 about this one this one feels weird doesn't it you've got us on a bit of an odd moment oh didn't see you there go have a hot chocolate guess we've got no choice but to see you again tomorrow yeah well i'm loving podmas by the way me too best decision ever and i really i know i was saying earlier but i really do think we're gonna take a lot of what we've tried to do in podmas i think we've learned and carry it through as the crux yeah it's a new era chapter that hasn't been disappointing it's been like better than oh it's been fun hasn't it yeah yeah surprised by it like as much as like this is gonna be fun i think it's exceeded my expectations in oh good of it all well i think almost it's like
Starting point is 00:33:22 god i feel really like i'm on top of everyone's lives like i feel very close to everyone i think almost it's like god i feel really like i'm on top of everyone's lives like i feel very close to everyone i think that's it yeah yeah it's almost like once a week jesus that's that's um like god do you know us once a week i was thinking that i was like god you didn't know us at all yeah you need the daily updates it's almost we were so self-indulgent before and we somehow found a way to take we're gonna start doing like two a day hourly podcast guys we have to last hour was crazy 10 o'clock was right let's go thank you so much for being here thanks guys hopefully we'll see you tomorrow i'm sure we will yeah we've got nothing else yeah better to do. And neither do you by the looks of it.
Starting point is 00:34:06 Well, congratulations on the Podmas. Congratulations on the Podmas. Actually, I just have a funny thing. Oh yeah, go on. Sorry. No, no, I love it. I just met my little sister who is eight years old and she lives in Lisbon and she just came over to England.
Starting point is 00:34:18 Yeah. I just literally could only see her for probably about 40 minutes, which was gutting. But she, and I gave her a little cuddly toy of the movie Vivo. you seen this it's like a little monkey thing isn't it yeah it's a kinkachu apparently he's rapping it's vivo and i watched it with her like a few months ago so i gave her a toy vivo that was nice of you what was her christmas present godmother activity tick no it's just a little tick against your name movie and loves it so much she buys toys um she loved it though um but i had my phone case like on the table and she grabbed it and she was like if you don't hear from me assume the worst
Starting point is 00:34:55 and i was like you know i have a podcast and she's like yeah yeah it's like god eight years they do so that's what we say at the end of the podcast and she was like why assume the worst it's just a funny thing like don't take it to heart like don't worry about it little joke she looks so adult stuff well congratulations congratulations on the podcast on the podmas nice on the pod most nice wendy's small frosty is the ultimate summer refreshment and not because it's cool and creamy and made with fresh canadian dairy it's also refreshingly cheap just 99 cents until july 14th it's a treat for you and your wallet

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