Going Deep with Chad and JT - Ep. 10 - Epic Brawls, Stephen Hawking, Carbs
Episode Date: March 21, 2018Chad and JT dive deep into a discussion about parking tickets, an epic brawl in high school, Stephen Hawking, old college hangouts, and then answer some fire questions. Check out our patreon at www.pa...treon.com/chadgoesdeep
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What's your team?
Go with me
Chad and JT
What up Stoke Nation?
This is Chad Kroger coming in with my compadre JT
What up?
What up dudes?
Um, how you doing dude?
I'm chilling dog
I'm having a pretty solid day
Everything's cruising as it should.
Nice.
I had a pretty good morning.
I pulled this move.
With parking, I think you're kind of the same as me with meter maids.
You have a more optimistic approach.
I pulled a move where I parked illegally.
I knew I was going to be gone for like 20 minutes,
and I'm like, this is the only spot i'm
going to park illegally take the risk because i was like you know what i think i can make it without
the parking ticket and i made it without the parking ticket so i was pretty stoked on that
yeah i think anytime you can get one over on johnny law yeah it's like a huge boon to your
daily happiness because you're like i got away with something
yeah yeah you know a lot of times people be like what are you doing that's illegal i'm like
i got this okay relax yeah you're a little bit like don't make me think you think this is my
first time like i have done illegal shit like this before yeah i know how to do it and i'm
prepared for the consequences.
Yeah.
They're like, oh, are you scared of, I'm like, no, I'm like, are you scared of authority?
Cause I'm not.
And I'm going to park in this fucking spot.
Yeah.
It's a little bit like Ferris Bueller's day off where like the sister's consistently annoyed
with Ferris getting away with like cool shit.
It's like, well, it's not really something that you should be preoccupied with.
Yeah.
He's doing him.
You do you
yeah and you're on your own courses her whole day got ruined because she was all pissed off about
what he was doing and he was just like chilling he wasn't thinking about her at all yeah that's
like you know with parking spots like i'll park in loading zones all the time and you know people
will question it i'll be like what i'm loading you know like what i came back out i parked in a loading zone one time and i went inside
a store and then when i came out a parking attendant was trying to give me a ticket so i
bolted across the street and i was like dude dude what are you doing i'm leaving i'm leaving i'm
parked in the loading i was here for less than five minutes he just kept riding without acknowledging
me yeah so then i jumped into my car started it and went to pull away and then he he was like stop
stop stop and i just didn't listen to him the same way he didn't listen to me yeah so then i jumped into my car started it and went to pull away and then he he was like stop stop stop and i just didn't listen to him the same way he didn't listen to me
yeah and then he came running up and he banged on my window yeah and he was like he's like what are
you doing i told you to stop i was like dude i was trying to talk to you for like 30 seconds you
didn't acknowledge me at all now you want me to acknowledge you he's like he's like you were
parked illegally i was like it's a five minute loading so you have to be in the car while
loading yeah or like in and out of the car like and i was like
all right and then he's all right and then i drove away so you didn't get the ticket i didn't
get the ticket nice yeah i hate how they do that they just like start writing you a ticket and then
you come up and try to talk to them they must be trained to do this and they just like tunnel
vision like horse and erase it and they just like are like and keep writing you a ticket and i'm
like yo acknowledge me yeah i'm a full human being i think they're just they deal with dick
weeds so often that even when like a compassionate kind wise dude with good vocab comes up to them
thanks and probably drops like a huge word on them they're just like wow that was impressive but
i'm still gonna fuck this dude up
yeah so yeah they have to treat everyone the same regardless of vocab yeah so but maybe they should
take that into consideration like if the dude drops like the word rapscallion or some shit
and they'll be like all right dude you sir are being a rapscallion he's like whoa impressive
yeah you can park illegally you like an actor in. Impressive. Yeah. You can park illegally.
You like an actor in an Oscar Wilde play?
You can park however you want.
Yeah.
I'm like, thanks, bro.
You know what?
Stay here.
Keep your car here.
Stay here.
Do you have to read a book while you're here or something?
Yeah.
He's like, you probably need to read a book across the street so you can park here illegally.
I'm like, I suppose.
Nice.
There's words like that, like, or yeah yeah we often hang out like you
say often like that it sounds like smarty but it's not really you know what I mean yeah I had a time
where I was dropping the word certainly a lot yeah and I felt super fancy I'd be like well
certainly and people would be like oh and i'd be like fuck yeah
one time my dad sent um my brother uh my friend ross and my friend anthony to uh hitch an atv to
the back of a truck yeah like none of us knew how to do it and anthony was like the best at um
working with like you know tools or cars or i don't know what the umbrella term is but um
he he kept explaining it to us.
And then my friend Ross kept asking questions like,
so we're going to like put it on top of the ball and then it's going to hook.
And he's like, essentially.
And he kept saying essentially.
And finally at one point Ross was like,
we just quit trying to sound fucking smart and say essentially.
Okay, we get it.
Like Anthony kind of like went weak shoulder and was like, damn.
And I was like, but, you, but you were saying essentially a lot.
Yeah, essentially it didn't work.
Essentially, he got called out for saying essentially.
It is a good word.
I use that word in an attempt to like, with chicks or something,
I'll be like, well, essentially I'm from California.
And they'll be like, and then I'll get laid.
It's a tried and true method.
Yeah. California and they'll be like and then I'll get laid yeah it's a tried and true method yeah you
know I actually never mind no say it I've been considering getting vocab cards after doing this
podcast with you yeah you know what maybe you should have left that one in the head
no no I dig it I dig it uh it's funny to be like vulnerable about learning like uh dude by the way
i'm gonna start learning more and then your friends are like you better not what you geek
you're gonna try and learn more oh why so people will think you're learning and then you're like
this is why i don't talk to you guys. Fine, I'll shotgun this beer.
Just will you let me go?
Yeah, dude.
I always think that guys are so funny with the way they can hate on their friends for self-improvement.
Or just the way that guys can be casually cruel to each other.
I think there's a lot of dudes that try to do...
Because you know how you talk shit with your boys?
Yeah.
There's a lot of dudes that try to do that, but don't do it effectively it's just like mean yeah and not funny
yeah and they're like what i'm just talking shit i'm like no you just kind of suck yeah you just
kind of decimated a dude for no reason yeah he's like oh you can't take shit dude you can't take
shit and you're like i can take shit like don't question that but you fucking suck so anyway
i'm fucking trevor's mom the story trevor still hasn't gotten laid trevor tell the story about
when i banged your mom dude how come trevor doesn't want to hang out what's going on it's
like he's trying to go to law school what all right trevor yeah i've known a lot of dudes like that yeah i've been that dude like that like
i'm not coming from a place of like uh innocence like i've been a uh like a bully to people i'm
close to and then some people are like are just cool and so you try to put them in that position
and they're just like like i had a friend robbie who he went to a new elementary school and uh two of the kids in his class to pick on him went to his house and started
throwing rocks at it and he popped out of some bushes and he was like what are you guys doing
they're like throwing rocks at your house he's like all right i'm in and he just started hucking
rocks at his own house nice like he would not he wanted to be a part of the group so bad and he
understood the psychology he was throwing up in his own house at his own house like they came to bully him so they started like hucking rocks at his house like
oh he's gonna feel like such a bitch when he sees this and then he popped out of a bush like a
weirdo like he was already living in nature and stuff like that like loners do and then um and
he was like what are you guys up to and they were like uh and then one of them stepped up was like
yeah we're throwing rocks at your house what are you gonna do about a bitch he's like help you
he started breaks his own window yeah it was like hugging
rocks at his own house nice he's like yeah bullying his parents there's all these rocks
thrown at our house yeah but i made friends yeah you nerds all right dive into current events yeah so uh yesterday stephen hawking passed away bummer he's a rad dude yeah
it's like i i'd have trouble saying what he did besides like science yeah but mass respect to him
i mean especially when you take into consideration like the physical limitations he had to endure
yeah whenever how much pain was he in?
Daily?
Yeah.
A substantial amount.
I don't think his life was ever easy.
I'm not a big science guy.
Well, you'd like it.
Yeah, for sure.
I like the universe, and that's all I got to say.
What else is wild about him is that he left left two of his wives i think for new chicks
after the als had completely made him immobile that he was still a coxman i'd like to see that
how that went down yeah they made a movie about like his relationship with his first wife i think
i'd rather see him when he was in his player days yeah he just rolls in he's out in the field He's just hanging dong Him and Mystery are at a bar together
Yeah
Just what up
Yeah I heard Stephen Hawking read the game
And then he would go peacocking at bars
Like he'd be in his wheelchair but with like a cool hat
And goofy sunglasses
And then he would nag chicks
He'd be like
That's an ugly purse you have there
And I was like oh my god
Nice jeans idiot nice jeans
idiot i'm just kidding ha ha ha ha uh is it cruel to the dead to do impressions of them
i don't know this one's pretty fresh he's a beast though he lived a hell of a life yeah
one's pretty fresh he's a beast though he lived a hell of a life yeah what else we got siesta key oh dude my favorite chad and i have been watching siesta key lately it's uh a riveting drama
uh a lot of betrayal i think the the they really did a good job with the villain
because he has a broken jaw so it's like even with the wired shut jaw, he's still just destroying homes and just being...
What's his name?
Alex?
Alex.
They all hate you.
They don't love you.
Yeah, he's talking to this pretty girl, Juliet, who's dating another guy, but they have a history together.
this pretty girl juliet who's dating another guy but they have a history together and then he with a broken jaw kind of uh makes her feel bad in a way where it's like he's the only one who understands
her and he's like they're all talking shit on you none of them like you do you hear them they're
being real and she's such a babe too and she still makes out with him even though he's got a wired
shut jaw i'm like first off that's dangerous
yeah it looks unsafe second this guy's a fucking douche and there's something when you get a wired
shut jaw yeah it's not it's like on your teeth like all of his teeth look like the bad guy from
that james bond movie jaws where it's like it's all steel in his mouth.
Yeah.
It's kind of unappealing.
You can't imagine a 10 smoke show like Juliet finding that appealing.
I don't know what she's doing.
He's just like, he's just spitting game with his jaw wired show.
He's like, what up?
And she's like, oh.
He's like oh he's like fuck yeah well i think there is something hot and having
that kind of like obscene confidence yeah in the face of such when your face is such a horror
you just stroll up what up guys i'm here to take your chicks
all right you got a wired shut face bro oh hey Alex
hey what's up
nothing how's your jaw
oh it feels good
so what do you want to talk about
everybody hates you except for me
what
hey
come here
no I'm dating Kyle Kyle What? Hey. Come here.
No, I'm dating Kyle.
Kyle?
Kyle's cool, I guess.
Whatever.
What?
Nothing.
Did you just invite me on your yacht to, like, try and hook up with me?
Yeah.
Fine.
Siesta Key, dude. it's a fire show.
Everybody listening, watch it.
It'll fill your day with a lot of joy.
Yeah.
You want to shout it out?
I got a video from a couple of legends
that I should just...
These two bros,
Cole DeGroat
and Jack Michael.
What up, dudes?
What up, legends?
They sent me a couple videos
of them giving a
what up council speeches at their school.
What?
Yeah, and I just want to commend them.
Their writing was super solid
and they're super passionate.
And they it wasn't the same speeches as ours, but like the same kind of framework.
And I was super honored by that. You know, even from the video, I could feel the passion.
I'm like, I got to give these guys a shout out.
This is Chad Kroger and my home dog, JT. We're here to talk about the ideals of the energy that this committee provides. Do you hear the passion in that?
Yeah.
It's magnetic. You guys are fire in that? Yeah. It's magnetic.
You guys are fire, dude.
Yeah.
So thank you guys so much for sending us those.
That was straight fire.
Straight fire.
There was so much passion in your voices,
and I could feel it percolating throughout the room,
and you guys got everybody fucking amped, dude.
Yeah.
Cole DeGroat, Jack Michael, what up?
Thank you, legends you legends dude that just
hit me with a spike of something good dude because i'm feeling like jacked up from my
knees up to the feet up dude i can see it you got goosebumps ah
thank you fellas thank you for that you changed my day, which could change my life.
All right.
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Yeah, and then Chad and I use our Helix beer bongs for more than just beer.
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Shout out to Douglas, dude.
You're a beast.
All right.
Let's get into it.
My dog, Chad, who is your legend of the week my legend of the week
okay my legend of the week is uh sarah from sarah's kitchen uh so in college there's this
place called sarah's kitchen where we would all go um post rager usually sundays to just
brunch have some mimosas eat some omelets and keep the party going
a little bit and i just want to give a shout out to sarah she was so accommodating very motherly
vibe so like i knew i was in good hands while getting fucked up on a sunday morning you know
thank you for continuing the party you know i people say sundays they get sunday scaries but with with you sarah i
get sarah's sundays my legend of the week is my dog brooks brooks what up dude he's just a freaking
legend dude i have grown up with him my whole life he was one of the tallest kids at our junior high
but he was super laid back.
He one time threw an apple at a kid on a bicycle. And when the apple hit the kid's leg, the apple broke in half.
Nice.
He has other feats of strength.
He's doing CrossFit right now, which keeps him strong.
He also shot our music video about Melania Trump.
Yeah.
And if you guys have seen it, it's visually sumptuous.
And that's all because of his cinematic
eyes. So muchos gracias to him for being a wonderfully intuitive director of photography.
Yeah. And then outside the workforce or outside of work, he's just a fucking killer dude to hang
out with. So killer. He's great vibes all the time. He's warm. He's compassionate.
He's intelligent.
His family is super, super solid.
Big ups to Rob and Chris and Chloe.
Always loved hanging out with you guys.
Always loved coming over
and kicking it at your crib,
sleeping in the game room,
leaving the dehumidifier on,
which always fucked with my throat,
but I guess was good for Brooks.
Yeah.
And I just, Brooks, I just want to give a shout out to just your overall vibe.
It's just a vibe of coolness.
I think whenever you enter a room, it's just like everyone can feel it.
They're like, all right, this is chill.
Especially because he's such a tall dude, but he has such a cool laid back vibe.
And you can just hear it in his voice.
It's just sort of like a calming effect where you're just like, all right feel good with this guy in the room it's a very solid energy and whenever i
edit those uh look at the edits for the videos and i can see him talking from behind the camera
right not see him i can hear him talking from behind the camera i'm just like damn
this guy is positive vibes all the time like he's sensitive when he's shooting and then he's strong
when he's moving yeah all right dude who is your babe of the week my babe of the week is uh
my first grade teacher miss daphne i was at that age where i'm like i just didn't really understand
the magical effect that a babe could have on you but But then I'm in first grade, and Miss Daphne, whenever she would teach me the ABCs
or teach me about different colors or even touch me,
I felt this tingling feeling in my body.
And I'm like, whoa, I don't know what this is yet, but she gets me super excited.
And so looking back now, i know that was my first like
experience of a little boner thank you so much for exposing me to the magical world of like
female touch those junior boners kind of shape who we become yeah all right dude my uh babe of
the week is tammy tay Tammy Taylor is Connie Britton's
character from Friday Night Lights. For those of you who haven't seen Friday Night Lights,
do not turn off the podcast, finish it, but then go watch Friday Night Lights. It's a wonderful
show about America, about community, about what brings us together despite our differences. And
I think it's a lot of fun, super well-made and just a,
a really, uh, complete emotional experience. But let's get back to the babe of the week,
Tammy Taylor. It's such a great character. Like she has the three S's she's super hot.
She's super empathetic and she's super ambitious. She not only is like a great mom,
empathetic, and she's super ambitious. She not only is like a great mom, she not only supports coach who's trying to, you know, win football titles in like the pressure cooker of
West Texas, but she also, spoiler alert, spoiler alert, goes from being a stay-at-home mom to a
school counselor, to a school principal to a college
chancellor. It's an incredible journey. And she takes the whole journey with so much grace and
dignity and her heart's always in the right place. She's trying to help the kids. And she's just very
understanding of people's mistakes. And that to me is so hot like she can just see she can separate the sin from
the sinner and i think that compassion is what allows the sinner to become what they really want
to be which is a moral winner sorry for the rhyming but i just just, I like people like Tammy Taylor and Connie Britton.
You played that character beautifully.
You really just made her America's hot mom.
And thank you.
All right, dude.
Who's your beef of the week?
My beef of the week is with just carbs in general.
Yeah, you know, I grew up loving sourdough toast.
I grew up loving sandwiches.
I grew up loving spaghetti, pasta.
And once I heard about the debilitating effects of carbs,
I felt so betrayed.
Why do you have to taste so good but have such a negative effect on my bod it just really makes me fucking pissed off
like i just wish i could go to the spaghetti factory in newport beach right now and just like
eat a bunch but like carbs are poison it just really bums me out to know that
like to know that carbs did not have my back and were actually making me foggy headed and just not
a beast that makes me so pissed off be a little more helpful to my body so i can like eat the fuck out of you but also like put on a show at the beach
so that's my beef absolutely the pleasure is there but the pain in between the pleasure
is too much who's your beef you want to hear about my beef of the week my beef of the week
is with puzio puzio was a dude in high school who after school one day we were, okay, so just a little context,
freshman year of high school, I was four foot 11 and a half inches, 97 pounds. I was small.
And a lot of my teachers actually told me I had small man complex, which is where you
overcompensate for your size by being loud and ferocious. So I did have a little bit of an edge.
Puzio was also really small. He was a year older than me. He's about five, 105 pounds and a gymnast. Like he used to do the rings. So he was kind of shredded
after school. One day he came up and maybe because of some pressure from his boys,
he tried to punk me and put me in a headlock. I was having none of it. So I tossed him off me
and I was like, what bitch? And then the whole school, like literally I'd never seen, I didn't
know this many kids went to the school surrounded us. Like kids were like coming out of like the sewer lids and like coming out of like windows.
I was like, dude, where the fuck do all these people come from? They're all staring at us.
And they're like, fight, fight, fight, fight, fight. And then Puzio was like, I'm going to
fight you at the football game tonight. It was Friday when this happened. So Friday night lights.
So I was like, all right. So I went home to my mom and I said, mom, this kid Puzio challenged
me to a fight tonight. I'm going to the football game and I'm gonna fight him because I keep it super real with my parents and my mom was from
Colombia and she understood noble combat and she's like okay John she was like John Thomas
It's okay go to the game go to fight him and I was like, thank you mom
And she's like but first let my friend Scottie drive you so my family friend Scotty drove me to the game
Give me a quick pep talk
I got there and I was still hoping the fight wouldn't happen. Cause I was like nervous
to fight in front of people. Cause you're worried. You're just going to look like an idiot. But all
my older friends were like, dude, you got to fight him. And I like trusted my older friends.
Like they actually knew what the fuck they were talking about. I don't know why they said I had
to fight him. I never pursued the question that deeply, but they were like, you got to fight him.
And I was like, all right, fuck it, fuck it. Let let's go fight so we walk outside the football stadium
and there's like literally again i've never seen such a big congregation of people in my life
like this was like uh like a heavyweight title fight there's like just like a huge circle of
people and i walk in puzio's already shirtless and he's punching a guy's hands like warming up
i was like what the fuck it's like what are you even even training for this
since we got into the argument today and then all my friends like all right dude here's what you're
gonna do you're gonna go in there and you're gonna like he's gonna try and tackle you you're
gonna knee him and i'm listening to my friends like they know what the fuck they're talking about
meanwhile nobody knew what the fuck they were talking about fight starts i take my shirt off
got a few little when i took my shirt off which felt good got in there i looked at him pow my lights go
out but then i come back i just got hit in the head but i was okay we start fighting we were
both so little we couldn't really hurt the other one badly like it was more just like hitting each
other with pillows but i mean it was crazy and i was such an idiot i would punch him to the ground
and then i'd go i didn't want to punch a guy when he was down because i'd watched too many action
movies and i believed in honor so i'd'd stand up and go, get up,
get up,
get up.
And then we'd keep fighting and we'd get really tired.
So then we'd have round breaks where we'd go back to our friends,
me,
the freshmen,
him,
the sophomores.
And my friend's like,
you're doing great.
You're doing great.
Like work your jab more.
And I was like,
yeah,
yeah.
Okay.
I'll work my jab more.
And then all of his friends were like,
you're doing great.
You're doing it.
We go back in there.
This time he's got rings on and he starts clobbering me with rings.
And I was like,
Hey,
Hey,
I like stopped the fight. I was like, timeout like stopped the fight i was like time out time out i was like do you take take the fucking rings off take them off and he's like all right all right he took the rings on brass
rings he put on like like like those cheesy like independent like yeah he wore a bunch of them on
his hand he started hitting me and i was like damn i was like was like, fucking hurts. Yeah. And then I was like,
why are you wearing rings?
I was like,
take the ring.
Cause at no point was I ever really mad at him.
I was only doing this out of pressure.
So then we get back in there,
we start squaring up more.
We start scrapping more.
I run at him to tackle him.
He gymnasts me like jumps over me,
like split legged.
And I fall down a huge hill.
I was at the bottom of that hill.
And I was like,
this is it apart.
And I just climbed up that hill dramatically. One step at a time. I got to the top of the hill. I was at the bottom of that hill and I was like, this is it apart. And I just climbed up that
hill dramatically. One step at a time. I got to the top of the hill. He went to punch me. I grabbed
him like this forward way, started strangling him with my hand across his throat. He kept trying to
hit me, but I just squeezed, squeezed, squeezed hard on his neck. And he went, and he went to the
ground. And then I just choked him until he vomited. And then I started kicking him in the
stomach once or twice. And then I went fights over. And as I just choked him until he vomited. And then I started kicking him in the stomach once or twice.
And then I went, fight's over.
And as I was walking away, he was like, poor, poor.
But he couldn't get off the ground.
I was like, you're done, Puzio.
You're done.
And then I walked away and all my friends were like, what did you want?
And like chicks were coming up to me.
They're like, oh my God, you won the fight.
And like my mom's friend, Scott was there.
He's like, how'd you do?
I was like, I won. And I went home and i had like big knots on my head because one of the
times when i tackled him i went down to jump on him he was wearing his shoes he like up kicked me
in the forehead i was like blah and then i got home my mom took pictures of my head she's like
they may try to sue you so i'm going to take my mom's from columbia i'm going to take pictures
of your head so they took pictures of like my bruised up face it wasn't that bad and then i
was like so stoked then the next day i get on instant messenger my buddy andrew hill who like really understood
fighting in high school culture texted me he's like hey you lost the fight and i was like what
i was like i kicked his ass he's like you can't walk away from a fight you lost that's what everyone's
saying so i get to school on monday and everyone in my grade's like you won but all the older kids
are like you lost you walked away and i was like, so what does that mean? They're like it means you have to fight him again. I was like god damn it, dude
God fucking damn it. Is this gonna define the rest of my fucking life?
I was like, I don't want to go through that pressure cooker again. I fought the kid. I won the fight the movie's over
All right
There will be no karate kid, too
And then I was just like dude i'm not gonna fight him and then so puzio sensing that
Apprehension in me would just follow me around all day.
I'm like, fight me again, par.
I was on Adderall.
It made me fight worse.
I hadn't taken Adderall at this point.
Now having taken drugs, they make you fight better.
So I was like, I was like, I was like, fuck, dude, I'm not going to fucking fight you.
Just leave me the fuck alone.
Move on with your life.
And he wouldn't.
He'd like text me.
He'd like message me at home and be like, hey, when are you going to fight me again, par?
And I was like, dude
I was like you got to move on
It's not gonna happen. And so basically I just ignored him for a while
And that was the end of it. But here's the real kicker. I've grown since then. I'm like a buck 70 now with a solid squat
He's still like five two. So I just want to put it out into the world
That puzio if you want to settle it
once and for all i will fucking beat your ass you fucking bitch way to throw it out there at the end
dude that was a riveting story i was like really engaged in that thank you dude that's my beef of
the week pusio yeah pusio suck it dude par's gonna beat the fuck out of you pusio i can't wait to get
my hands on you yeah you ruined so many days my freshman year you fucking piece of shit and you know i beat your ass the first
time it should never even have come to this nice plus i was like getting off him like i just i gave
him a lot of advantages in the fight that now as a more bitter person i wouldn't allow yeah the fact
that he put rings on it's just like give, give me those rings. I put them on.
And you're like, dude, what the fuck?
Yeah.
He also, like, I had him in a headlock at one point.
He was, like, punching me in the balls.
And I was, like, saying it to the 9,000 people who were there.
I was like, hey, so everyone knows Puzio's hitting me in the balls right now.
Is this your hero?
Is this your friend, Puzio?
Is this your king?
Is this your king?
Is this your king? Is this your king is this your king is this your king is this
your king the ringed ball puncher i want everyone to know i fought with nobility yeah fucking puzio
puzio get your shit together dude puzio you were so stupid he was always a stupid stupid person
yeah it seems like it would have been not just to clown on him for being a gymnast Yeah, I mean he did like have like
People did clown on him a lot
Yeah
So maybe he, it sounds like he had the little man syndrome
Oh for sure
Yeah it was like
He was like his little man syndrome of his grade
And I was my little man syndrome of my grade
Yeah
You didn't win the fight, you walked away
Dude he was throwing up on the ground
and crying and he was like poor and i was like i was like do i have to kill him do i have to like
go up behind like do the fucking mel gibson from lethal weapon just grab his jaw on the back of his
head twist it hard until his neck breaks i'm like puzio you're literally incapacitated you know what
you should have done you should have done that move move from Black Panther where you throw him down.
I mean, you didn't have a waterfall, but you could have just run down the hill.
Just put him over my shoulders and held him.
Just like looked at, is this your king?
And then he just, mm-hmm.
Yeah, but see, Killmonger was more upset in Black Panther.
Yeah, you were just doing it out of pressure.
I was just trying to get the fuck out of there.
Yeah.
I was like, all right, you know. Oh, other of pressure. I was just trying to get the fuck out of there. Yeah. I was like, alright, you know.
Oh, other funny thing. I called my mom
right before the fight. I was like, hey mom, fight's on.
I gotta go. I left
my phone on. Totally
accidentally. So my mom listened to
the whole fight from home and was like,
Tomas, get him! Get him! No!
No! She had like a play button. She heard me
roll down the hill and was like,
Jesus Christ! And then she heard me at down the hill. I was like, Jesus Christ.
And then she heard me at the bottom
of the hill be like,
oh, fuck.
All right, all right.
Come on, part.
We got this.
All right, one step at a time.
Oh, Jean-Thomas.
Jean-Thomas.
Oh, she was so proud of me too
when I got home.
My mom was like,
Jean-Thomas,
no more fighting,
but I'm very proud of you
for standing up for yourself
and for winning the fight.
I was like,
thanks, mom.
Your mom's the best.
Dude, she's a beast, bro. She is. Because she used to do that to me i remember one time i was like
fighting this kid at like in kindergarten and i wasn't hurting him and then and then he just like
kept going at me and then my mom just looked at me and we made eye contact and she nodded her head
yes and then i fucking kicked the kid in the face my mom was like she thumbs up me nice work
yeah because i was in karate at the time so i I was like, oh, it's on, bang.
Yes, sensei.
Yeah, exactly.
Once it was deputized by my mom, I was like, all right, this is fair.
All right, let's get into some questions.
John, what up, Chad and JT?
I'm currently away at college having a sick time.
However, I think I'm starting to get feelings for my at-home hookup buddy who doesn't go to school near me.
And I feel it's affecting my ability to pool at school.
Any advice on what
I should do in this situation? Love the pod.
Keep doing what you're doing.
Did you say what the distance is?
It's not near him.
So I
would imagine that means
at least to stay away.
I would either do one of the two things I'd either end that hookup buddy relationship so you can move forward in your endeavors or I would um
explore that love and maybe do a long distance thing which doesn't sound like you want to do but don't deny love dude my dog john i like where chad's coming from i always
think that true love is something to pursue and to cherish but i actually have a sneaking suspicion
that in this case it's not necessarily the buddy that you miss i think you miss home and the buddy
the buddy is an extension of that like you're
having fun at college but you still have unresolved feelings from of not wanting to let go of who you
were and what you had and i think the best advice i can give you is to let go and go full head of
steam into this new life and really experience all of it. Because if you experience it with an eye towards the past,
you're going to miss a lot of stuff in front of you.
So really just get fucked up and learn new things
and discover what the world has to offer you.
So not only cut off that relationship, just look full steam ahead.
Yeah. And just like just like all right that was
home time this is now and they'll be back i mean dude there's there's breaks you know there's
thanksgiving there's christmas there's summer yeah but there's you know whenever you move to
a new place you're always thinking about you know your buddies back home or whatever and it's just
like it yeah it just gets in the way yeah and it's a good problem to have It's a problem of abundance Where John has a lot of things
That he likes
And maybe cherishes
But
At that age you gotta just take what's in front of you
Yeah
I agree
Puzio where you at dude
Puzio you fucking bitch dude
Puzio you fucking piece of shit
If you're anywhere near where we're recording dude I swear to god I'll come find you right now Dude if Puzio, where you at, dude? Puzio, you fucking bitch, dude. Dude, Puzio, you fucking piece of shit, dude. If you're anywhere near where we're recording, dude, I swear to God I'll come find you right now.
Dude, if Puzio is right outside this recording area, I will fuck you up so hard, dude.
Puzio, we're going to smash you, dude.
You got no fucking clue.
Yeah.
I wear rings like crazy now.
Puzio, I have a steel-toed Vans shoe.
I got 30 rings on my toes.
Puzio, I will hit you in the balls. Puzio, I'm going steel-toed van shoe. I got 30 rings on my toes. Puzio, I will hit you in the balls.
Puzio, I'm going to hit you with a stick.
All right.
Tommy, what up, boys?
This is more for JT, but Chad, I would appreciate your input as well.
A couple weeks back, I was at a late-night party with a few of the homies and a bunch of randoms.
After gauging the room, we realized that we didn't know anyone, and the party was going to be super lame.
We decided to remedy this situation by being the most fucked-up guys at the party. That's awesome.
That's me editorializing. and I already hate you. You think you were so fucking cool using your vocab words, but you're not. Shut the fuck up.
I could have ended this girl's whole career,
but I decided otherwise.
Regardless, it was a super embarrassing moment.
My question for you guys is,
how do I use my vocab without sounding like a pretentious fuck?
Thanks, Tommy.
JT?
My dog, you got called out,
and her gripe is legitimate,
and I don't say that to judge you at all.
I love that you're trying to expand your intellectual world.
I think that's a wonderful endeavor and it's going to pay dividends for the rest of your
life and a lot of parts of your life.
But you do make yourself vulnerable to these kind of attacks and everybody's vulnerable
to different things.
We all have our weaknesses.
I've definitely been called out for that a bunch of times, dude, where people are like,
I've been by my friends sometimes.
They're like, you pseudo intellectual bitch. Like you you're overcompensating just trying to sound like
a smart guy we all know you're fucking generic as fuck and uh you know what i just had to just
take that shit in stride and i like that you didn't end her career because i think like we've
said before it takes more courage to let a jabroni live yeah i would say uh there's such a thing as
trying too hard too you don't want to be one's such a thing as trying too hard too you don't
want to be one of those guys who's trying too hard like you weren't learning like 10 new words
and you're just firing them off non-stop people are like all right dude we get it you know you
want to sprinkle them into the conversation to where it's like you want to be graceful in that
you don't want to just because no one likes a guy who knows everything i know it all because you
want to be a man of the people you don't want to you don't want to be like one of a guy who knows everything i know it all because you want to be a man of
the people you don't want to you don't want to be like one of those guys who's like yeah i go to
harvard and you're like all right well i'm not gonna hang out with you fucking douche dude i
think yeah i think chad's absolutely right i think uh you're like a baby cobra right now with your
vocabulary where you don't know how much of it to use in your bite. So you're putting too much poison into your bite.
Poison being a huge vocabulary.
So you're just going to learn as you become a bigger Cobra,
how much poison to use with each bite.
Yeah.
And you don't need to use all of it to kill somebody.
Jay walk,
dear chat and JT.
What up chat and JT? It's your boy, Josh, also known as J walk
from the East coast. I've been lifeguarding for some time now. Thank you for your service. And
it totally blows. I'm not going to go into much detail, but my manager sucks. My coworkers eat
ass and I really just want to chill. However, there are some benefits like meeting hot women.
I wouldn't have met. And I keep a pretty nice bronze throughout the year. Can you give me any
advice on what to do? Please help sincerely east boy your east coast boy jaywalk
uh well dude when i first heard the first part of the question i heard
i'm a lifeguard and i'm like fuck yeah dude so you know i wouldn't uh you know i guess there's some variables in there that you don't like
you know like your co-workers eat ass and your boss sounds like a fucking nimcom fucking poop
so just focus on the positives like think about what you're doing you're bronzing
you're saving lives you're potentially making out with hot chicks just uh block all the negativity
out and just be like at least look at what i am doing and then your co-worker might come out to
you and just you know start eating ass and you're like just block them out yeah i agree i think um
you are our east coast boy, Jaywalk.
Corey, what up, bros?
Third time commenter, long time listener.
Love the show and love you too.
I'm euthanizing my freedom officially to my baby mom in October, which means one more epic bash with my boys.
If you bromo-sexuals were planning a final bash for one of your homies,
how would you send them off into the sunset?
Final bash with the homies?
Yes, sir.
Stick to your guys' favorite things and just hit each of those points.
What do we like to do?
We like to get Coronaritas at Chili's.
Then we like to go pregame doing this.
Then we like to do house party, whatever.
I think you've got to think bigger, though, dog. You think dog you think you gotta go bigger this is the final send-off yeah you're right i think he wants us to say cabo to him or new orleans or austin yeah you're right i fucked up i fucked up you
gotta go to cabo run it back hit it yeah all right my bad dude i think i was just i was in a weird place
you gotta go to cabo you gotta go to new orleans you gotta go to mardi gras you gotta go
where there are wet t-shirt contests pharmacies with illegal substances
amf adios motherfuckers l squid Squidro. Chips. Guac.
Tanning.
Babes.
Dudes with sombreros.
Cabo.
Yeah, dude, I think you know the places you got to go.
I mean, I'm sure you guys have your favorite partying places.
It might be Vegas.
If you got the means, go to Cabo.
Go to New Orleans.
You know, some of these new cool cities that people are doing are like Austin and Nashville.
I have not been to Nashville, but I heard it's sick as fuck.
I think the thing that I would be most on top of is the makeup of the crew.
Make sure you got your chill dudes
who are just fun to hang with,
and then make sure you got your party guys
who know how to bring it.
That's a very good point.
And make sure you've got party guys who know how to bring it that's a very good point and then uh and make sure you've got like one kind of like family member type who will keep you in check so
you don't um you don't come apart too much and die yeah exactly and uh so yeah pick one of the
pick one of the go-tos the cabo the vegas the new orleans the austin and um absolutely let it rip yeah make
sure you get a wild card in there like ass clown who will get naked the first day you get kicked
out of the hotel so you guys have an amazing story yeah that's true there's always that one
friend who's like a little bit of a problem but the problems in the long run end up being like
the substance of all the best stories the best yes um oh what was i gonna say oh make
sure puzio's there so you can fuck him up yeah make sure puzio's whatever city you go to invite
puzio too so you guys can fucking hit him in the nuts yeah catherine hey dudes i just listened to
this week's pod amazing by the way but one of the questions was totally fake someone described a
scenario about being the most popular kid in school and trying to make the nerdy science girl prom queen after his girlfriend broke up with him for
a reality star but that is the exact plot from the freddie prince jr movie she's all that just wanted
you to let you know because it wasn't cool anyways i love you guys in the podcast what what
oh fuck yeah she's right
I was so stoked on that question I just realized
dude I didn't even realize
the advice I gave him
was the same as what the guy does
in that movie
hey guys you know
we put our hearts out on this podcast and please do not send in plots of movies
as questions like we we get personal we're hoping that you'll get personal too you won't just
riff on what freddie prince jr and paul walker did although i'm stoked that you chose a paul walker movie but um fuck yeah man that hurts dude thank you katherine for um telling us an uncomfortable truth we needed
to hear it it's like when you got a booger in your nose like you're a little embarrassed that
someone pointed it out but you gotta remove the booger yeah
fuck man i don't even want to finish the fuckingoger. Yeah. Fuck, man.
I don't even want to finish the fucking podcast now.
Dude, you got this.
Keegan, hey, bros.
Loving the fire pods.
Recently, I've accepted the pissing in sinks movement doctrine,
where you piss in sinks because it saves water,
but mostly because it is just way more convenient
and ultimately a freeing experience.
Unfortunately, I'm not sure if my bros will accept this practice.
How should I get them on board?
Keegs.
I had a bunch of boys in college do this.
Gross as fuck.
I am absolutely against it.
Chad, I'm so glad we're on the same page on this.
Yeah.
You may conserve water, but you know what you also conserve?
The number of friends you can make.
Oh, dudes. Oh, look. Oh oh there's three open urinals nope taking the sink to conserve are you peeing in the sink dude
yeah dude it's way better for stuff and it's freeing
i was gonna wash my hands in that oh you're right dude it's fucking disgusting i can't even do the full thing
as the peer because i can't put my head in the head of a peer in this thing i think it's gross
yeah i think it's super gross and like yeah our rules of bathroom etiquette are arbitrary but
guess what they're also fundamental yeah you don't pee where you put listen hippies you can take your water conservation and shove it
up your ass dude piss in a bush if you want to conserve water yeah pee outside dude but once you
go into the bathroom pee in the designated spots you're breaking the trust of the people who use
those sinks to wash their hands and one more thing keegs i love you man sorry for coming down on your heart dude you know what i just just came to my mind i bet poosie is a fucking sink pisser
yeah if he was yeah when he stepped like when he like he'd be so short he'd have to like stand on
one of his friends like backs to do it yeah you know what if we see him and he's peeing in the
sink we should give him a swirly in the sink yeah Yeah, dude, feel free to pee in sinks if that's what you call Puzio's mouth.
But dude, yeah, sorry, Keegs,
that we came down so hard on you, dude.
You're a sweet bro,
and thank you so much for writing in
and loving the pod,
but I'm sorry, dog.
Once in a while,
we got to drop the moral hammer.
Boom.
Corey, what up, Chad and JT?
I've got a real dilemma on my hands
me and my fiance
met on Tinder
three years ago
and now we have
a two year old daughter
and are getting married
in October
congratulations
you both and Strider
are formally invited
to the wedding
dude I will
we will for sure go
we are a real miracle
and I love her to death
in the family I've created
my issue is
I haven't gotten a blowy
since I took her to see
the first Fifty Shades
movie in theaters
yes fucking three years ago
and I'm coming to the realization that if I don't put my foot down and work out a deal
for some mouth hugs i may never get my pipe smoked again her excuse is that she developed a bad gag
reflex when she was pregnant and just doesn't feel like it how would you dudes approach this so she stopped
she stopped
giving the blowies
after uh
after like
first date
yeah
and he's saying
that she has a uh
gag reflex
yeah
did I hear the
when she was pregnant
oh
but I don't she's not pregnant anymore
i don't know i've never really been in this territory you you're more experienced than the
longer relationships i'd say one you're just better at getting blown than i am
dude um it's tough man because you never want to like you know like it feels gross for both parties if you have to like coerce them into some sexual behavior that they're not
comfortable with. I think it's just communication, dude. It's an uncomfortable talk, but you have to
tell her like, look, I really love blowjobs. It's a way that I feel love. And and you definitely got
to be going down on her, too, because you don't want to if you're not going down on her, there's
no argument to be had. It's so tough, man, because you don't want to – if you're not going down on her, there's no argument to be had.
It's so tough, man, because you don't want to be a guy either who like blows up a beautiful thing because you're not getting blown.
You're like, oh, I have this beautiful family.
We have a beautiful relationship.
I have a beautiful life and I'm willing to toss it away because she won't blow you.
But at the same time, it's something you enjoy and it's not something you – if you had your choice, you'd want to live without.
So man, I would just really communicate with her about it.
And honestly, dude, this is like a weird thing to suggest, but like couples therapy.
Yeah.
Cause if you go to a therapist, they can like see more objective about it and they'll be like, well, here's why a blow job is important to them.
And then they can kind of convey the point
to her in a way where she won't get defensive and it might open up some other shit that helps out
and i really do think if you go to it dude you'll be getting all sorts of lowies
mckenzie what up chad what up jt i'm a senior in high school and as a proud listener of the pod
i'm thankful to you guys for amping me and my bros up during a shitty second period you've
brought so much camaraderie to me and the lads these past few weeks.
However, ever since spotting JT in a Steelers hat on his Instagram story,
I've been in a serious state of inner turmoil these past few days.
I've shown this emotion to my boys because I'm no longer afraid to wear my tears as a badge of honor,
just like JT said.
Nothing they say can comfort me, though,
and I think the only thing that will is an official apology to all of us.
Please, JT, in the name of Paul and a pair of big old titties,
I beg you to get that shit off your head.
Sincerely, a concerned citizen of the universe.
Dude, he's hating on your Steelers, man.
I mean, it's not coming off my head, but I love you dudes.
Back up your team, dog.
Yeah, dude, it's not coming off the head.
Look, if you don't like them,'s a simple maximum sports beat him yeah if you don't like him beat him i don't what team do you rep
yeah are they ravens fans i i'd say i think it's time to separate fandom from the dude i mean you obviously have a ton of respect and love for jt
so you know i think i think you can uh i think you can i think i think you have it within yourself
because i don't think jt's gonna ditch the steelers like that never i mean then i think
you'd have less respect for him so i think i think you're at a point now where you can reach that level of maturity where you're
like all right dude you may like the team that I hate but I can see past that and still love you
as much as I do what up Chad and JT you guys are stoked legends love the pod I'm running in on
behalf of myself and my squad in trying times in regards to our lead bro ryan ryan is a beast holding down several jobs a gnarly school schedule and still
finds time to hit the gym with the boys and rage on our bro soppers on the weekends our main rage
station about a year ago ryan had his heart broken by a she demon since then he has been on a noble
hunt for a queen to match his king-like status among the squad respectively dating games and
chicas one at a time searching for a soulmate. Two months ago, Ryan met a girl during a math tutoring session on campus and has
since fallen madly in love. Her name is Megan, and from his description is a sweetheart and a girl
whom he seems to have real chemistry with. However, since this reunion, he has been missing gym
sessions and ragers to accommodate this newly found love interest. This absent has weighted
heavily on the squad of late, and we've reached out to him on several occasions to meet her.
Following our request, he brought Megan to the gym to meet the squad of late and we've reached out to him on several occasions to meet her.
Following our request,
he brought Megan to the gym to meet the squad during a Friday gym ritual.
And she seemed like a real sweet girl.
Yet something strange happened following our gym session.
Ryan didn't bring Megan to the rager.
We had planted soppers following our gym ritual.
Jumping forward.
Ryan just broke the news to me that he has asked her parents for permission to marry her.
Her parents said yes,
yet I don't blame them for giving them,
for giving their blessing.yan is the best bro i know a genuine hard-working dude and a hero among the squad all this however just two months after meeting megan even more troubling is that
she is barely 18 years old and i fear she has now real relation and she has no real relationship
experience myself and the squad include fear for this union because we don't want to see ryan's
heart get broken once again by a possible disease she demon yet also because we fear of losing our lead bro
should the squad be worried about this girl not coming to our ragers do we trust this young girl
to stay true to our most loyal and respected bro or do we respect his wishes and give ryan
our blessing as well this is it yeah um fuck dude the truth is ryan has a weakness yeah it's not these girls ryan is i know a lot of dudes like
this who are excellent in every field but when it comes to love they that's where their weaknesses
manifest and there's nothing you can do dog all right guys that is it for episode 10 of the going deep with chad and jt
podcast we left on such a bummer dude yeah he'll be all right you guys will be good yeah he's gonna
be a good dude we just gotta get out here um thank you so much for joining us for episode 10 guys
check out um our patreon uh we have bonus content on there patreon.com slash chad goes deep and uh
keep writing questions we love them and uh you can submit questions at chad goes patreon.com slash chad goes deep and uh keep writing questions we love them and uh you
can submit questions at chad goes deep.com and uh thank you guys so much guys love you dudes all
right later