Going Deep with Chad and JT - Ep. 101 - Joker, Miami Playboy, ASMR
Episode Date: November 8, 2019What up stokers, in this episode we give our personal takes on the new Joker movie, discuss the Miami playboy, Anton, give a little ASMR action, and also some fire tough guy talk. Check it out!Check o...ut our t-shirts at www.chadgoesdeep.com
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Ooh, mama, what up, Stokers of Stoke Nation?
Give it to me and say, give me some sour gummies, uh, I don't know.
Uh, I'm here with my compadre jean thomas what up what up stokers
boom clap i got jt with a fire sweatsuit going on right now yeah no i'm a 80s aerobics instructor
you're not jane fonda anymore i'm jane defonda but i think she did that yeah um you were supposed
to dress up as well i know i forgot i totally i was so uh
i was so disturbed by the joker that i forgot to get festive dude took you to a bleak place
i had to call my mom after you did yeah what'd she say she's like uh just stay stoked um go
get some you know avocado or something and just uh watch something that'll bring up your mood.
I can always count on her.
She's the best.
Yeah.
That's good advice.
So I just watched Arnold Schwarzenegger lifting.
Nice, dude.
Yeah.
Just got me back in the mood.
Yeah, so the Joker, what did you think about it?
You know, it was well done, well shot.
The score was great, I thought.
Joaquin is excellent, but really not my cup of tea.
You know, the legend Paul Schrader says that art is a tool
that helps you learn about yourself and other people.
And what I learned about myself is that I love Stoke.
So this is kind of the opposite for me.
Dude, that's crazy because you quote Paul Schrader too.
He's probably the most for me. Dude, that's crazy because you quote Paul Schrader too, is probably most legendary film is Taxi Driver,
which the Joker is like heavily indebted to.
Yeah, it felt like a taxi driver with a huge budget,
but way more predictable.
Right.
I'm with you.
I didn't like it either.
Yeah, it just felt like you kind of knew where it was going.
A lot of the stuff that I think they intended to make
sort of like a surprise or something like it's spoiler alert that he was like delusional about
there's gonna be a lot of spoilers so if you're not into it yeah start skipping forward yeah the
uh like the girlfriend or whatever that she wasn't that whole thing wasn't real it's like
you could see that a mile away right um yeah i thought i thought it was impressive and it's crazy that they made a big
budget movie like that right about something so sad you know you don't generally see that yeah
like like just telling a story about a psychopath and really getting into like yeah nothing good
ever happens right but he's the thing is it's it doesn't feel like a descent into being a psychopath
because he kind of feels like a crazy person from
the beginning yeah like you don't you're like the moment you look at him you're like this guy's got
no shot yeah and so him going crazy i was like well he is i mean he brought a gun to him i know
he got beat up but like he brings a gun to like a children's hospital like he's kind of nuts he
already is crazy he's crazy it's more like he's taking off his mask yeah and then like there was
just some parts that i thought were poorly written like when he confronts who he thinks is his dad bruce wayne's dad what's bruce
wayne's dad's name uh thomas wayne thomas wayne when he confronts him in the bathroom and thomas
is like a total cock about it right he's like you're my dad he's like no i'm not you're a loser
and then he socks him in the face he's like listen your mom's crazy i never slept
with her if you come here get my kid again i'm gonna fucking kill you yeah and he's like that's
how you react we call the bodyguard yeah if there was a psychopath confronting me in the bathroom
i wouldn't be like hyper masculine and cocky and i'd be like listen loser you better beat it and
then smack him in the face i'd be like okay hey whatever you say man i am your dad and i love you and i'm so
proud of you and then i get out the door i'm like security execute this dude yeah you're just taking
a piss in this psychopath's there first off i'd get pee shy yeah like can you not look at me because
i'm trying to pee and second off he's just like washing his hands he's like oh your mother she
was crazy i never slept with her all right dude by way, you've got the mangled looks of her.
You're like, all right, dude.
Why don't you be a little bit more chill, chill?
Yeah.
Oh, you're the guy that came to my house.
All right.
Let me handle this.
And then it was like, I thought they should have just kept up the ambiguity,
whether it was his dad or not.
And once you find out that his mom lied to him and that he just is crazy,
it took away a lot of the power for me.
Because I thought a lot of the power would be in, is he crazy?
Is he not crazy?
But they kind of very much settle it on the side of he's just nuts.
Yeah, there's really no chance for redemption.
There's no opportunities for him to sort of break free.
It's like you know where he's going the whole time.
It's just predictable and like i read
some reviews and they're like new york times is like besotted with the notion of its own audacity
as if willful unpleasantness were a form of artistic courage the film turns out to be afraid
of its own shadow or at least the faintest shadow of any relevance i don't really know what that
means but i think that's what i felt dude I felt while watching it that so well encapsulates what that movie is
because it thinks because it's so intense that it's deep
but it's not, it's not really saying much
yeah it felt arrogant
and I love Todd Phillips
and I love Joaquin Phoenix
but it was just full of itself
like this is the Joker
cue the big score.
And Strider made a good point too where he was like,
the thing about Joaquin Phoenix's performances, it's amazing,
but we've seen him be intense and very committed in other performances.
So it's not as like shocking as Heath Ledger as the Joker
because we've never seen him do anything like that.
Right, right.
With this, it's like, yeah, that's Joaquin Phoenix.
He's amazing at being creepy and weird and compelling.
Yeah.
But it's not like, it's not, I don't think it's unique in his oeuvre.
Yeah.
He should do like Road Trip next, something like that.
Yeah, if he did something light.
Yeah, that would be shocking.
Yeah, if he was just like a charming lead in a rom-com.
Yeah.
Like him and Katherine Heigl.
Yeah. They're like dueling
newscasters yeah and it's hard for me to talk poorly about it because i love todd phillips
i love joaquin we already covered that but you know i just uh and plus it's just so bleak
uh i just and i guess it's supposed to make you uncomfortable but it just it wasn't like
i was like blown away i was like this is disturbing but you know it's supposed to make you uncomfortable, but it wasn't like I was blown away.
I was like, this is disturbing, but it's really blowing my mind.
It's like, this is kind of what I expected.
And he goes, Joker's so monotonously grandiose
and full of its own pretensions
that it winds up feeling puny and predictable.
Nice.
This guy really fucking gave it a scathing review.
That was a different one.
Oh, whoa.
What was that one?
I forget what that one i uh i forget what
that one what'd you think aaron dude i liked it oh dude we needed that yeah i i enjoyed it a lot
i thought it was a unique take i thought the acting was really good i'm i'm behooved to to
speak to this side of things yeah fired up on that word behooved. Yeah. I've been trying to look for situations to say the word bequeath.
Yeah?
I just like bequeath.
You got to hang around more people who are about to die, dude.
I bequeath unto you.
Be like, so what are you going to do with your stuff?
Do you think you're going to bequeath it to anybody?
Yeah.
I bequeath unto you my tank top.
Or you could go to a yard sale and be like, hey, how much for that lava lamp?
And they're like 20 bucks.
You're like, how about you just bequeath it to me
dude actually well I'm
moving soon so maybe I'll
I'll bequeath
my running shoes to the gym
I currently work at
I'll just bequeath it to them and then they'll be stoked
and I'll get new ones
fuck yeah dude you're just gonna give them shoes
just as like a token of my appreciation
are they gonna give them to other people
or are they just gonna hold on to them and be like oh dude i'm hoping they'll put them in a case
and just say like chad sprinted here dude not that i want to be all like showy super important
self-important or whatever but you know i just the treadmills there have done me well and i'm
stoked on them and uh i think crunch um maybe i'll take some of their memorabilia and put it in a case in
my b room or something dude also so on saturday we went to um a famous person's halloween party
yeah we signed an nda so we can't say what we can't say we went to the party we can say we went
to the party we just can't say what we saw yeah oh okay yeah because people were posting about it
oh okay we went to demi lovato's halloween party and i showed up first yeah i was the first person there oh shit yeah you're like i showed up super dude i was
party started at seven i was there at seven yeah you're like dude i am gonna get there at seven
right when it opens i don't want to have any headaches getting in i'm like i'm gonna show up
at 8 45 well we've been to some of these parties before it's impossible to get in at a certain hour
i was like i'm not i'm not a big deal i'm not taking chances and i had a plus one
and they had they had it kind of misaccurately unacc misaccurately written down so i think if
i had come later with our buddy dan i wouldn't have been able to get in yeah but i got to meet
demi because i was there early and she came up and was like what's up but she was in like a full
pennywise outfit she was nice she's very normal yeah like i was like, what's up? But she was in like a full Pennywise outfit. She was nice. She was very normal. Yeah.
Like I was like, whoa, you're like just like a regular person.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah, it's weird how that happens.
Yeah.
You're like, you know, I may be Pennywise right now, but I have feelings.
And I got fucked up, dude.
I haven't been that drunk in a while.
You were really bringing it.
I was bringing it, dude.
Yeah.
I think I was trying to prove something to Dan because it was my first time partying with him.
Yeah.
And then I think I was trying to prove something to myself.
Trying to prove something to everyone there.
Well, I felt like this energy.
I was like, JT's on a mission tonight.
Yeah, I was.
Yeah.
I talked to every single person at the party and I danced like I was going to power a nuclear reactor with my fucking hip jerry.
We were tearing it
up I mean yeah with that dinosaur with that dino costume that thing is ripe because hip movement
and just jiving it's like another partner on the floor yeah it's like you want to do the t-rex
justice um and uh it just it looks amazing when you dance with that thing yeah you know because
it's just a mind trip
you're like who's really dancing is it chad or is it that dino and i'm like you'll never know dude
right you're communicating through the dino right right yeah i smoke cigarettes i haven't smoked
cigarettes in years yeah i smoke six of them you were cheating i get it because it gives you like
you don't want to stay inside the party it was at a club called hide you don't want to stay in the
club for too long then you have a reason to go outside.
You smoke a cigarette and you're like, all right, let's get back in there.
It does make sense for setting the tempo.
It's something to do.
But man, that hangover.
Yeah.
Splitting headache for two days.
Dude, when I was there too, I ate a garlic hamburger.
And the food they had was all garlicky.
But yeah, you were hungover.
Yeah, I'm sorry.
Because we had some work, and I was coming in, I was like, what's up, Dane?
I'm fucking fucked, bro.
Well, you weren't that, I mean, maybe you felt bad on Monday, but you didn't seem that bad.
Oh, that's good.
But then on Tuesday, I was like like there's like a dark cloud hanging over
you i was like i thought you were like upset i was like what's going on no i felt upset but it
was just a hangover yeah yeah i was rubbing my head like like i literally was just massaging my
head yeah i yeah i got into a fight with sally like because i was like so just grumpy like i
just made a joke and on any other day just would have landed yeah
maybe but uh it came across like more like acidic and like she got a little upset and i was like
i was like babe i swear it's just because i'm so fucking hung over yeah yeah i um
yeah and you were just housing cereal and stuff i ate three bowls of cereal dude yeah it's very
uncharacteristic i don't eat cereal i haven't had cereal in 15 years dude my stomach was lit up bro
i'm not doing that again for a while i might take a bigger break from milk and cereal than i do from
drinking yeah dude i um i know that about myself because sometimes i'll just get cinnamon toast
crunch and like a gallon of milk and just house it in one night and then i'm just like freaking a balloon of gas for a few days and um
i'm thinking after we're done with this thing that we're working on i think what i'll treat
myself to is like a huge box of cinnamon toast crunch maybe we should talk about that too that's
gonna be good i'll just i'd love to get some french toast crunch right next to you oh dude yeah
just split a dude get a when you get a big bowl and you just pour the whole cereal into there.
I love when it gets soggy.
I love the soggy.
There's like a perfect soggy level.
Yeah.
I love soggy stuff.
And then you chug that sugar milk.
Yeah.
One of the great pleasures.
I kind of like food that's like been out for a while.
You know what I mean?
Yeah.
When it's kind of soggy.
Like people always clown on me.
They're like, you're going to, you're like, it's cold. You like it's cold you're gonna eat that like that's been out for a while i'm like
it's soggy and the texture is just right i think with dishes where the food like coagulates it's
the best like mac and cheese or rice when it's mixed with other things yeah when it gets that
sticky kind of quality to it that's when it's the best for pounding yeah i do if you get like a
caesar salad and you let the croutons just, you know, become one with the dressing.
Yeah, I don't want them at full crunchiness.
No.
You're like chipping teeth.
Yeah, it's too hard.
It's way too hard.
Yeah.
What's your favorite cereal, Aaron?
You know, I've been getting into Cinnamon Toast Crunch lately.
It's good stuff.
Have you tried French Toast Crunch?
No, no.
They have a cinnamon toast crunch
uh churros as well a full ctcc i've heard about those that sounds pretty intense yeah it's pretty
good uh but i'm you know i like my classic frosted flakes dude you know what i like
chocolate rice krispies is that what it's called rice krispies yeah yeah yeah or cocoa k Krispies. Is that what it's called? Rice Krispies? Yeah, yeah. Yeah.
Or Cocoa Krispies.
Cocoa Krispies.
Thank you, Aaron.
Cocoa Krispies.
More than Cocoa Puffs.
Yes.
Yes.
Because they got this new, they got this unique kind of flavor to them.
Cocoa Krispies, Cocoa Puffs are kind of unpredictable, I think.
But these, they get soggy fast.
They have this like cool, like, I don't even know how to describe chocolate.
Right?
No, but you're hitting on what I'm thinking.
It's like extra milky chocolate.
That's what it is.
It's extra milk.
And when it's got that kind of like that soft texture that you can just kind of like just put your tongue through.
Yeah.
Yeah.
If you follow.
Yeah.
Dude, you know what kind of cereal I like?
What's that? After I do a bunch of fucking blow, follow. Yeah. Dude, you know what kind of cereal I like? What's that?
After I do a bunch of fucking blow, bro.
Yeah.
I like Froot Loops, bro.
Tricks.
That's what I like is tricks.
My brain got confused for a second.
So not Froot Loops? Because I haven't done blow in a while.
I've been taking a little break so I can build up for a massive fucking blow sesh.
Is it the bunny?
You get fired up on the bunny?
Dude, I eat my fucking tricks and I look at the bunny
and I just laugh for about an hour.
I'm like, you're stuck in a box, bunny.
Yeah, I mean.
Not to have shot in foot,
but I know that bunny would rather be in a patch somewhere
rather than stuck peddling sugary goop
to a fucking coke head like me,
even though I'm the fucking man.
I just know that that rabbit's probably got aspirations, dreams, you you know and i kind of laugh at it because i'm living out my
dreams and this rabbit's stuck he's stuck honestly we have all the cereal mascots i think he's the
one who looks like he's most on blow and he made whatever he made he got stuck there yeah yeah
they sentenced him to that yeah peddling To peddling the sugar bites. Yeah.
Yeah, that's probably true.
When I think in terms of freedom of the people who are in cereal boxes, I think Count Dracula.
I think he's living life exactly the way he wants to.
He does blow.
Yeah.
I think the Lucky Charms guy, he's a lot of fun.
Lots of blowing.
I haven't partied with those guys yet, per se, but I can tell by looking at them that
they get after it.
I'll tell you who's not doing
blow i'll tell you who's an na narcotics anonymous narcotics assholes is uh the kashi guys oh for
real they don't even have a mascot they got like some healthy looking like twig and you've seen
them there no i haven't seen them there but they got that kind of like uh better than now holier
than you kind of attitude you know yeah? Yeah, I mean, for sure.
I mean, Kashi Galeen, that's quite a phrase to come out with.
And you know what the worst part is?
The hypocrites.
All the Kashi people, all the people who make Kashi are hypocrites
because you pretend you're healthy for me, but guess what?
Yeah, you got some fiber, but it doesn't matter if you got 40 grams of carbohydrates
and 20 grams of sugar.
I mean, what the hell are we talking about? You know what makes you actually go lean? What's that? You got some fiber, but it doesn't matter if you got 40 grams of carbohydrates and 20 grams of sugar.
I mean, what the hell are we talking about?
You know what makes you actually go lean?
What's that?
You know what it is.
Keto, baby.
Blow.
Oh, dude.
I can't believe I didn't get that one right.
Yeah.
That's fucking crazy.
That went over my head.
I don't even do blow, and I just know.
I'm just your intern.
It keeps me lean, bro, for sure.
Bro, intern.
Yeah, but you're the CEO of the interns.
Oh, dude, thank you so much.
Chief Executive Ox, bro.
You're built, dude.
You're strong.
Oh, dude, thank you.
Well, actually, I was coming in today because I was like, you know, I love talking about cereal.
Me too, bro.
I'll go all day.
I love talking about anything, really.
Deep dives.
Dude, what about the Frosted Flakes tiger?
Oh, Kellogg, that guy? That guy does blow, does blow right i mean he's kind of the old stalwart you know he's been there for a while holding it down yeah to be
honest i think he's getting a little long in the tooth pun intended i think he's ready to fall
and i think if you put me in a ring with him and i got a bump ski and you know i've been working
out and i'm keeping shit tight I'm gonna put him down
you could be his ass
I'm gonna work my jab
he's a tiger
he's probably not used
to being jabbed
you know he's gonna come back
with some paws
but I see him
coming up on his hind legs
coming at me
with the front paws
maybe even trying to bring
his big teeth
onto my throat
I mean that's ripe
for a body shot
I mean that's when I throw
a left to the fucking
to the liver
and I put a
tiger down have you ever fought a tiger yeah yeah yeah i have i went on a safari uh in uh the congo
yeah and uh i was out there with some friends and this tiger was just talking shit you know he's like
and i said shut the fuck up tiger not in front of my he's disrespecting me
in front of my friends which i have a nice time looking at the wilderness and so i said not i
said enough you know i'll give you i'll give you a break this one time because i mean i mean you're
a country but after this you know bullshit talks my fist walks and uh and uh he kept talking you
know because he didn't understand me because i guess he's a tiger but I understood him and it's a two way street
so then I hopped out
of the fucking jeep
and you know
everybody there was like
hey don't do this
come on
what are you doing
I said stay
stay out of it
you know
because I don't bother them
when they're fighting
you know with their families
or whatever
they don't fight that much
but if they did
I wouldn't butt in
and then so I go over there
and I said a tiger
hey look at me in my eyes
look at me in my eyes
and I did a little coke
I offered the tiger some coke.
He didn't do it.
He didn't do it.
Damn.
Blatant disrespect.
Yeah.
So even worse than that, he doesn't do the blow.
He hits my hand with his paw and wastes like three bumps.
Dude, he wasted the blow?
Bro.
Tell me what happened next. You know what happened next how'd you beat
his ass first i took my shirt off real slow you're so jacked too and i just pierced my nipples right
yeah i love your pierced so i was looking fierce yeah and i freaking i hit him with a fucking
flying pelvic thrust yeah you hit him with your hog i hit him with my hog damn dude and i'm not gonna
embellish i didn't knock him out clean right there i just wobbled him was it like did you have like a
half chub or like was it just totally flaccid is it that kind of hard of a hog well i'm one of those
guys who can do all the blow in the world and it does affect my penis i can't get hard so i wasn't hot so maybe your
balls did most of the work my balls did the heavy lifting you have a huge bulge in sack
thanks dude yeah i got a nice piece i wish it would get up there more but i'm doing so much
blow it's kind of hard but i don't mind going down on whoever i'm partying with for as long
as they need you know because when i'm on coke i'm a giver dude yeah and that's what i tell
everybody at the office i get on the pa system and i say never forget yeah boss man's a giver yeah and
we're all going to be given when we get the next quarter's earnings and everybody's happy i want
everybody to be given because we're grateful we're grateful and i'm always grateful and that's why
even after i knocked the tiger out with a roundhouse kick i woke him up i said hey good on
you bro for taking it like a man.
Tiger. And then
I gave him a little pouch of the Blosky and went his way.
I guess that makes sense. I mean, in the last
moment, you were talking all about the importance of
having a solid beanbag.
Yeah.
And just making sure your nuts are in check.
And now I get it.
Yeah, you do, man. Because you can knock out a tiger with a good set
of nuts. I can see that in your eyes
that you get it too, man.
That means a lot to me.
That's why you're
Chief Executive Officer.
That's why you're doing
such a good job here, man.
And everybody's really thrilled
with how you've been performing.
Well, that's actually
why I'm here.
I was wondering...
What were you wondering?
Is that below?
Yeah, I cut you a line there.
Should I do it right now?
Do it, please.
Well, basically, I was...
For trust.
I was...
Whoa!
Oh, dude.
I didn't see a hungry, hungry hippo on that safari I was on.
Whoa, dude.
Oh.
Hey.
Oh, you got a nice tone to your voice.
Have you seen my sack, dude?
Oh, let me see your nuts, kid.
You want to see them? Yes, please. All right, let me see your nuts, kid. You want to see them?
Yes, please.
All right, let me see them.
Thank you very much.
Ta-da.
Dude.
Beauty, right?
Yeah, bro.
Where'd you get those?
I'm almost proud of the fact that I don't even have a long shaft so it can accentuate my balls.
Very smart, dude.
Very smart.
Yeah.
Thank God for that average shaft.
I'll put you at average. Yeah. Because it really sets the table for those beautiful balls. Yeah. Thank God for that average shaft. I'll put you at average.
Yeah.
Because it really sets the table for those beautiful balls.
Yeah.
And I knew you had nice nuts the moment I hired you.
I know I have nice nuts.
I knew you had nice nuts the moment I hired you.
I told everybody.
We had an office meeting.
They said, why are you hiring this guy?
I said, he's got nice nuts.
How's that sound?
How's that sound?
Everybody was a little freaked out.
I said, listen, listen, listen.
I know it sounds weird, but I know what nuts can do.
That's why I went to my mama one day.
I was like, mama, thank you so much for giving me a thumbtack for a cock
because it accentuates my balls.
It accentuates my balls, ma.
The family jewels, ma.
That's the mojo you got in your freaking testicles.
That's beautiful.
And I got a freaking thumbtack for a cock, and the ladies love it. That's awesome, ma. That's the mojo you got in your freaking testicles. That's beautiful, dude. And I got a freaking thumbtack for a cock, and the ladies love it.
That's awesome, dude.
That's really awesome.
The ladies do love it.
You know why?
You know why I know?
Why?
Because I see it in your eyes.
I see it in your eyes how happy you're making people, and that makes me happy, dude.
Thank you, dude.
With whatever God gave you.
Thank you.
And God gave it to you.
Thank you.
And I'm going to give God something when I see him.
Tell me.
As a bump.
A blow?
A blow.
And I'm going to say, God, you've been doing a great job, but the party's about to get turned up.
I'm wondering, you know, God made blow, right?
Yeah, I think so.
Yeah, yeah.
Without a doubt.
I think getting offered his own blow, that's something that no one else has done before.
They say you can't take it with you.
They don't know how good I am at hiding things.
Yeah.
I'm taking it with me.
Up your butt.
Bye-bye.
All right.
That's good stuff, man.
What else is cracking?
Oh, dude, we watched a video about a guy
who would be good friends with the tough guy.
Yeah.
The Miami guy, Vice.
I've been looking at Vice videos lately because that's where we found the one about the China
information collectors and how a society built on people surveilling each other, basically.
And now they had a video about this guy who's the most Miami guy ever.
His name's Anwar.
He's a former model and picture framer.
And he loves Miami. And he does all the things that miami guys should do yeah looks like he does lots of drugs and he
sleeps with lots of people i love how he fires off the video with a um he's like you know people
always ask me this question what makes a house a home no no no about miami he's like what makes you so miami and he's like i know and i
always and i always say the same question i am miami right i'm like that's not a question yeah
right he was a beat his voice was really weird yeah i'd have to listen to it to get his voice
right and i love in the comments they're like this guy's done so much below. He came and talk anymore. That's really what it sounds like
First million dollars about that car and wonder garden
What I believe this changes a house to a home. It's not all these little memories
It's not a real moment until it doesn't tell a story my career i do like what he says there it's not really a home if it doesn't tell a story right
that is a pretty romantic way to think about you know decorating your place he does seem to have
an incredible life story here's one of the best stories that he tells on the whole thing
about a a powerful horse.
This horse is a complete maniac.
He was the son of the world champion.
The horse got up in two legs like that.
And a kid, well, he was like six foot tall,
but he was like, what, 17 years old.
And it was hitting him in the head with a cloth.
And I knocked the horse out. I punched him in the head and a cloth. And I knocked the horse out.
I punched him in the head and grabbed him from the ring,
and he went to the floor.
And I knocked the horse out.
Maybe that's where I had the tough guy inspiration,
because he's talking about knocking out a horse.
Yeah, that was just in my head. When you were talking about that, I was like, you knocked the tiger out.
Yeah, I knocked the tiger out.
I bet he tells that to everyone who comes into his house.
It's such a great story, because you just never see it going there. Yeah, he's like, so this horse was jumping around, so I knocked it out. It gets there so quickly, yeah. I bet he tells that to everyone who comes into his house. It's such a great story because you just never see it going there.
Yeah.
He's like, so this horse was jumping around, so I knocked it out.
He gets there so quickly, too.
He's like, oh, hey, horse, you got to calm down a little bit,
and then I punch it square in the face.
He gets a little bleak towards the end when he, no, that's great.
I love when he's trying to be all cautious, you know?
They're like, so how many people have you slept within your bedroom
he's like oh whoa whoa whoa you're gonna make me have to be like a playboy or something
i can only handle one at a time okay so i made this jacuzzi that fits 10 people and then the
shower that can shower five ladies at a time yeah he's like smart enough to be modest yeah but he
can't keep it up for more than like two sentences yeah he's like no i'm no
prince i'm no king i don't sleep with a lot of people here's my throne though check it out yeah
yeah he's a character i do love his uh sentiments on miami uh he's like where why would you live
anywhere else it's a good question and yeah i get it um miami guys they're just not pretending yeah they're like this is exactly what
i want they're like social norms be fucked i'm not pretending for anyone my whole family's
somewhere else yeah i'm doing it for me from now on it's time for my bath it uh dude i told
his story last week about or a couple weeks ago about about Sly Stallone and Richard Gere getting in a fight over Princess Diana.
And someone asked Sly about it on his Instagram,
and he said it was a lie that Richard Gere made up to sell books.
Oh, really?
He goes, total nonsense, made up to sell books.
That's funny.
What do you think?
I believe Richard Gere.
Of course Sly doesn't like the story. loses out on the chick and and on the gal
and then uh they say him and richard gear fought and it doesn't say who the winner was but yeah
you would assume sly would win so if it's a tie i give the tie goes to gear yeah for just surviving
man it would be funny if these guys reacted to this stuff in like a, they go low kind of way.
Not in a bad way, but they're just like, yeah, dude, Richard, you freaking won, dude.
I suck.
Yeah, that would be the better move.
If Sly said that, he'd be like, yeah, dude, that was hilarious.
Totally lost.
He was boning her.
Sorry, Prince Diana, not to disrespect.
But dude, that would be a much more likable route if he was like, oh, yeah, he for sure got the best of me that night. Yeah.
Yeah. Hey, you win some of me that night. Yeah. Yeah.
Hey, you win some, you lose some.
Yeah.
But she was really elegant and he was always debonair.
Yeah.
I'd be like, wow, Sly's a pretty cool guy.
Yeah.
Yeah.
If he's like pointing to the book, he's like stoked on the zinger by Richard Gere.
Gere gets me good in chapter 27.
Check it out, guys.
Yeah.
Maybe he was like married at the time or something and that's why he's like downplaying it.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Were you going to say something about the Miami guy guy though no i'm done with miami guy
miami what'd you think about miami guy aaron he reminds me a little bit of uh tommy wiseau
from the room oh yeah good comp same kind of hair except he has a slick ponytail and they're both
from like a place that i can't pinpoint you know yeah i've
i've uh waited on tommy wiseau once and he has like a a little like early 90s mercedes like
just that slick euro car yeah was it what was he like uh he's pretty quiet you know you just
kind of catch a little bit of that accent. It's fun to mess around with later.
For sure.
Dude, last night I fired up some ASMR videos.
Got the tingles going.
Yeah.
I used to be kind of very, ASMR is, what is it?
It's autosensory meridian response, I believe.
It's this feeling you get when you hear certain people,
their brains are wired.
I don't know if I've talked about it in the pod before,
but their brains are wired, so when they hear certain sounds,
it gives this orgasmic, tingly sensation in your whole body.
It starts in your head.
So I'll be watching videos of people just eating fettuccine Alfredo
with the mic super loud, and it's just orgasmic. That's your favorite, the fettuccine Alfredo. Yeah, there's something about the fettuccine alfredo with the mic super loud and it just it's orgasmic that's
your favorite the fettuccine alfredo yeah there's something about the fettuccine what is it uh just
the chewing the smacky smack yeah it's really weird dude when my roommate walks in he's like
what are you doing dude i'm like oh uh starlet his uh tell me better olive garden experience
can i try to give you asmr right now yeah yeah try and make me tingle no you gotta do like whispers or like i'm chewing um so the other night i watched this
movie parasite it's a korean film i forget the name of the director it's a really insightful
look at class which is very rare in american cinema so i was happy to watch it i liked how the characters all came from dude you're close really you're close.
Really?
You're close.
Am I giving you tingles?
Yeah, it's like right there.
I'm talking about the film Parasite, guys.
I think it's the best movie of the year.
I would definitely check it out.
Can I try a little bit more?
Yeah.
And the thing that I really enjoyed about the film also
was that no matter who the character was,
they both had some good and bad in them.
It kind of was like everybody's...
I'm sorry.
Damn, I lost it.
You know, I get too wrapped up talking about the movie.
Typing.
Oh, typing?
Yeah.
All right.
Do some typing.
Slower?
No, I think fast.
Hard. Harder. slower no i think fast hard harder type harder i can't i'm gonna break my computer i'm hitting this thing with anvil i think when we're forcing it it's got to be in private
you gotta let it happen yeah that's the thing right you can't just like
it's and you're in a vulnerable spot we're being filmed and recorded right now yeah yeah what what
happens to you when you go to your spot uh it's just like very relaxing and just kind of i would
have it as a kid and i didn't realize what it was and there's a whole youtube like some of these
these videos they have like millions of views there There's a whole like hidden ASMR community.
But as a kid, I would hear, you know, people talk or like eating chips or something.
And I'd be like, why does that feel so good?
You know?
It is nice that it was like for generations, like there wasn't a community and now y'all are coming together.
Yeah, because I just thought that was weird.
I was like, I guess I'm the only one who likes when people eat chips.
But now it's like a whole,
I need to reach out to some dude.
Maybe some stokers have the same thing.
Aaron, do you have ASMR?
I mean, I know I definitely did as a kid.
But you lost it like the Polar Express.
You can't hear that dog whistle anymore.
It might be it, I don't know.
It's still inside of
you dude yeah can can chad and i both try to make you tingle right now i mean i'd rather it be a
lady oh come on dude open your mind bro i look like a lady sometimes sometimes
the cardinal shouldn't win the world series i definitely think the cardinals all right that's working that's working yeah dude the cardinals should
have won the world series and i have one d2 of in and out too and you could merge those two
and then having the cardinals and i think you'll have an orgasmic asmr experience
similar similar color schemes of the two so yeah i think that's true that'd be a good way if i ever
had to say something like really bad news to you i just asmr it you know oh yeah like chad your golden retriever just died
it's really sad it's a good life oh dude that feels so good chad your golden retriever died
but it lived a good life what george died and then you go keep going
you're like keep going keep going i love dirty talk like just throwing that out there
you know i've tried i'm not that good yeah i mean i don't think i'm good at it either i think i just
love it yeah i know i'm not good at it i think i need to be freer i mean yeah i feel like you
could let it flow oh i let it rip yeah yeah. Yeah. I think you are good at it.
What makes you say you're not good at it?
Because one time I recorded myself and I listened back.
With the consent, we were both super into it.
Well, super into it.
We were into it.
And then I listened to it back and I was like, oh, Jesus, dude.
I was like, you sound like an idiot.
I was like, will you shut up?
So don't do that anymore.
But no, I do think I'm good at it.
Maybe I'm just judging my performance.
But it also sucks to listen to yourself.
Yeah, in any capacity.
You're going to judge it.
I just know mine's just very vanilla because it's just like, yeah, you like that?
Cool.
That's not vanilla.
Saying, yeah, you like that?
There's a lot of power and meaning in that.
I guess. You're saying, do you like me?
That's very vulnerable.
Yeah.
You like that?
You like that?
Tell me I'm tan enough.
Tell me I'm tan enough.
People are shutting off.
Sorry, guys.
Got lost there for a second.
Whoa, dipped into my own little thing.
That's why I go to meetings.
All right.
Dude, speaking of which, I just want to throw some love out to the ladies.
I think gynecologists could be a lot better.
Why do you say that?
I have a friend, and she told me she had to go to six different gynecologists
before she got an accurate diagnosis on what was going on with her.
Really?
Yeah.
She had vulvodynia.
What the hell is that? I didn't know.
But I wrote it down. I know what the vulva
is. That's the whole vagina.
Well said, dude. Thanks.
But the enthusiasm was powerful.
Well, whenever I know science, I'll tell you
what gets me fired up. Whenever I know
science and whenever I know, whenever
I've seen a movie that you haven't seen.
Oh, really? Yeah. That's nice, dude. Because I'm working on expanding my cultural knowledge. Dude, you're like science and whenever i know whenever i've seen a movie that you haven't seen oh really yeah that's
nice dude because i'm i'm working on expanding my cultural knowledge dude you're like a machine at
it oh thanks i'm like whatever whatever movie it is i'm like like you've seen it right you're like
i haven't i'm like what i know i've missed a lot of classics no you haven't you know like every
movie oh that's nice dude not every movie like every movie. Oh, that's nice, dude. Not every movie.
Most of them, except Spinal Tap.
That's nice.
Dude, I came up.
Oh, no, I'm going to use this later.
Sorry, I got uncomfortable with you complimenting me. Sorry.
I railroaded it into nothing.
Oh, you were talking about gynecologists.
No, that was it.
I just, doctors will tell you that nothing's wrong. And I know I'm like a hypochondriac, so that's what I need to hear. But oftentimes, doctors will tell you that nothing's wrong and i know i'm like a
hypochondriac so that's what i need to hear but oftentimes doctors will be like nothing's wrong
nothing's wrong and then something is wrong and and then so it just made me go down a rabbit hole
and i looked up like 220 000 people die a year from medical mistakes right yeah and they think
it's even more because hospitals are pretty reluctant to put down that it was their fault
on like the paperwork you know that's the third third leading cause of death in america yeah it's even more because hospitals are pretty reluctant to put down that it was their fault on like the paperwork you know that's the third third leading cause of death in america yeah
it's just doctors like effing it up i don't want to make people paranoid to go to the doctors so
go go go go that's what i'm saying is go but it's just crazy to me well people put doctors on a
pedestal and they should be on a pedestal in a sense, but you've got to remember that they're human beings. Yeah.
They're having bad days too.
They're getting ghosted.
They are eating carbs sometimes, and it's affecting them,
so it's going to affect their performance.
Yeah.
I remember I had something on my lip that I wanted to get checked out, and you used to expect doctors to be at your service at all times,
and I called my dentist, and I'm like, hey, can you come check this out?
And he's like, oh, Jerry, I'm on vacation.
And I was like, I don't speak English.
And he's like, oh, yeah, I was like, I got to check this out now.
And he's like, I'm on vacation.
So I had to wait like four days.
Yeah, you don't vacation, dude.
Yeah, I was like, you're a dentist.
You stay in your office. Yeah. you don't vacation, dude. Yeah, I was like, you're a dentist. You stay in your office when something happens to me.
Your vacation is when you get a charming patient like me
and you get to work on my grill, dog.
Yeah, yeah.
Doggy dog.
Dude, I, yeah, but that makes me respect pilots a lot,
that they're normal people who are fallible just like us,
but there hasn't been a crash, a deadly crash,
commercial crash in America in 10 years. Yeah. yeah yeah like they're keeping it together a little bit
you know what i mean yeah it is crazy when they're landing a plane you're like you're like man this
is a huge fucking thing yeah and they don't fuck it up literally ever yeah that we're coming in
dropping altitude and uh cool smooth landing um i was gonna say oh stoker called me out for
mentioning the dao de ching i saw that was he calling you out or was i i don't know i think
he was i think he was kind of calling me out he's like chad's mentioned this four times in the last
two episodes and i just want to say to him that's the only book i've read so that's gonna be my reference yeah i think for him it was
like yeah i mean that's the only book you need to read yeah fuck you i don't know no i thought he
was more like trying to say like uh like uh this book must mean a lot to chad um maybe because i read that comment too i wasn't really offended i just thought
it was kind of funny but you know maybe it's because it's me reading it um it's he says my
name i like perk up i'm like but it doesn't matter no it doesn't matter at all i know i sound uh bitter now no you don't
have funny uh it is no you don't sound you don't sound bitter you almost never sound bitter oh
thanks i know i always worry i'm bitter i am a little bit like i'm working on it with like
gratitude like just being less resentful and just grateful to people yeah it's getting a little
easier though like you're right like practice does help likeful and just grateful to people. Right, yeah. It's getting a little easier, though. Like, you're right.
Like, practice does help.
Like, if you just practice this shit and you slow down your brain a little bit,
you can rework it.
Well, it is so tough in this industry, especially.
But then the more you read about, like, I'm listening to,
I know I just said I've only read one book,
but I'm listening to this book on Pixar.
And the more you hear about all this stuff, teamwork the dream work baby let's go um so and you know you see other comics and stuff they get stuff and you're
like why why are they getting this stuff you know it's just like there's enough food for everyone
i know but i can be like a cunt where like someone like like they get fired from something i'm like
good yeah yeah yeah i think everyone has that
thought though yeah i there's i don't think that i think that i think everyone has that thought and
the key is you need to recognize that thought and you know like you did with that tiger just
the way uh anwar did with that horse just knock it out yeah yeah and then like someone will say
something kind of like that i think is like dumb or that i don't agree with and the loudest voice
in my head would be like just want to say like nerd shut up geek yeah you know but like how's that
yeah and then i'm glad i'm like mature enough now and like my brain slowed down enough from like
meds and medication and therapy to just like put that
thought away and just be like hey that's really chill man yeah and then like if i do have to like
if i do disagree i can do it in a way that's like helpful and not like just like about
hurting somebody's spirit yeah well you yeah i think you you realize that there's there's no
pot of gold at the end of that rainbow.
It gets you farther from the pot of gold.
It gets you closer to the lucky
charm guy doing blow.
You're like wailing on this person emotionally
and mentally and then like other people are running
over and grabbing the gold and then you turn back and go,
hey that's my gold! And they're like, well you were too busy trying to
like destroy this thing over
here for you to even get a whiff of it.
Yeah, i'll have
fantasies of like epic comebacks you know or like if someone if someone says this i'm gonna be like
well actually you know e equals mc squared boom and but then you you play it on your head and
you're like then we're both gonna feel bad yeah nothing good has of that. Takes more power to let a jabroni live.
Yeah.
There's a French phrase for that.
When you think of the comeback too late,
I think it's,
L'esprit est l'escalier.
Hmm.
Yeah.
So, I mean, it's,
Bonjour.
Yeah.
Konichi.
What is the,
Bro.
What is the translation?
I think it's like a thought too late
or something like that.
Oh, nice.
But I mean,
it's so common that even the French
came up with a phrase for it.
Not even,
but like, you know, it's universal.
The French are wise.
They know arguments and boning.
Yeah.
I like their style.
Bon mot?
Bon jour.
A bon mot is a witty remark.
Is everything cool in French start with the word bone yeah my friend reggie has the best joke ever
what he's like do you know what bon jovi translates to english good jovi i think i've said that on
here before it's just a killer line i wanted to reference this about my dad too i didn't forget
to bring up my dad has the best saying for people who complain a lot uh-huh he goes they're a moaner
and he goes he
has two friends who i guess complain i don't think they complain more than most people everyone
complains but my dad always goes oh he's one of the moan brothers yeah he's a moaner yeah i'm a
moaner that's it looks like in uh joker spoiler alert again when robert jr is like there's a lot
of self-pity going on it would have been funny that you're kind of a moaner you're a moaner you're a moaner you're a moaner you're moaning all right what up stokers my dog and i are big
fans of the pod recently fallen upon difficult and troubling times though and it has my stoke
levels draining at an alarming rate we've been boys for years and more than that we've been
fishing bros and ipa aficionados together recently though my dog has hit it big on the gram and to
put it in other words he's blowing up i feel like he no longer has time for me now that he has so many influencer
friends with super bronze bods and world record sized fish picks. I'm stoked for my bro, but how
can I preserve our relation without holding him back from immense internet fame? Thanks, dudes.
That's a bummer, man. I feel for you, dude. I mean, I think he's riding this wave right now.
I don't think for you, I think, you know, again, it's the art of letting go.
You know, just let him ride this wave.
And when he comes around, be a good friend.
You know, be there for him.
Unless he's being egotistical then maybe say something uh but
you know i think he's gonna ride this way but eventually he's gonna come back yeah and i think
uh you know when this kind of stuff happens to people they probably have like a period of time
where they're like oh my god i have all these followers right now i'm gonna go to freaking
this club and hang out with influencers and stuff but then
eventually he'll realize that that's not what life is all about that's not bringing him true
happiness and he's gonna come back to his main dog for sure i think i think that's true dude
like the fish is going on its journey right now but it's gonna return upstream to you one day
yeah dude it reminds me of i mentioned him a week or two ago, the writer Ta-Nehisi Coates. So he blew up and then one of his friends did a story a lot like this for NPR's This American Life.
And he basically talked to Ta-Nehisi about how he felt like he changed and how it made him kind of insecure being around him.
And it was really interesting because you realize like Ta-Nehisi did change.
He did change a little bit.
Like he got a little more bougie and stuff
like that but his friend also changed you know what i mean yeah and so i think it can affect
how you're acting sometimes so you know try and monitor that as much as you monitor him and then
the other thing that tanahasi said to him that i thought was like pretty cool is he's like because
they're both writers he's like yeah dude like i hang out he's like you hang out with like forget
who he says but like someone like malcolm gladwell or something he's like yeah and then he's like yeah dude like i hang out he's like you hang out with like forget who he says but like someone like malcolm gladwell or something he's like yeah and then he's like yeah but dude
malcolm gladwell's like not smarter than you yeah like he's like had a few hits and stuff but he's
not smarter than you and like these guys that your boy's taking fish pics with they're not better
fishermen than you they're not cooler than you yeah like you guys are dogs for a reason yeah
because you got good shit to offer and you're a cool dude and so i wouldn't
let the optics of who he's hanging out with affect how you feel about yourself dude because you're a
legit dude yeah i wouldn't i wouldn't blow up this friendship either you know just keep him
in your squad uh let him do his thing and i think what's gonna happen is he's gonna
go on this journey and
he's gonna come back even more grateful to have you as his dog because he realizes that you're
the true quality dog in his life yeah and as his life changes he's gonna want more people who really
know knew him before like when he was in the hills not in the palace right and and that's gonna mean
a lot to him yeah i mean look at lebron dude with like Maverick Carter. He's got like his, his closest buddies or his,
his childhood buddies.
Cause they're,
they're,
you know,
through thick and thin.
And yeah,
I think you're,
you got to prove it now through the thick.
You've been there through the thin.
Now just be there through the thick.
Yeah.
And then at the end of it,
you guys are going to fucking have a nice time,
dude.
Cause you're going to get some access.
Cause you know,
he's going to have some cool shit coming his way and he's going to want to share that.
Yeah.
And it's going to be fun to share with you. And then you guys are going to get to experience that stuff together and you'll get to get some access because you know he's going to have some cool shit coming his way and he's going to want to share that yeah and it's going to be fun to share with you and then you
guys are going to get to experience that stuff together and you'll get to meet all these tan
fisher guys who sound legit but not more legit yeah so in the meantime dude keep landing some
huge marlin maybe land a dorado make some fire ceviche, throw some lime in there, and eat up, dude. Yeah, for sure.
Catch a killer whale, man.
Yeah.
But catch and release with the killer whale.
Yeah.
It's not a mount fish.
Catch the killer whale with good vibes, say what up, and then let it go on its way.
Maybe you're not allowed to fish mammal.
I know they serve dolphin at some places.
Oh, that's a bummer.
Yeah.
You just see that on the menu and you're like in america
you're like okay so you just killed the intellectual equivalent of an eight-year-old
you think that's okay yeah restaurateur yeah this thing was surfing like eight hours ago yeah
when i took the uh catalina flyer out here they were riding on the side of the boat yeah
dear savants of stoke new stoker here i dig the pod
so much dudes anyways to the question me and my lady friend go way to high school and have kept
it in touch throughout college i dig this chick and wonder why we never dated we get along same
interests same beliefs etc i have popped that scary question of why haven't we dated she quickly
said i don't know you're not my type it's been a few years we still chill and hang on the rag and it seems more and more that our feelings
might be mutual for each other so what do i do here dudes do i shoot my shot and get shot down
a second time or do i sit idly by and enjoy the friendship we have i'm at a total loss dude
thanks for getting me amped on life and raising my stoke daily dudes ross so he asked her out
already once a while back but he thinks that now the the feelings will
be reciprocated did he say how much time i think a couple years oh yeah i think i'd get back in
there yeah dude you don't know until you ask yeah but the thing i wouldn't do is burning up years of
your time harboring feelings yeah just make sure you do squats before i oftentimes when i have to
make a you know something that takes a lot of nerves,
I do leg day because I get those fire juices going.
Walk in there proudly and say, what up?
Do you want to get ice cream?
That was great.
What is up, legends?
I am a current college bro who has recently gotten into your podcast.
Got to say they are truly epic.
My question to you bros is this. I played lax in the high school
but broke my back, which kind of threw a
wrench in my college playing plans and I lost a lot of
offers. Nevertheless, I put my nose to the
grindstone and worked super hard in PT
and training to work back to my former glory.
I was walking onto the D1 team in my college
when I found out I had broken my spine again
and this time there would be no coming back.
I feel like I lost a solid, I'm sorry, dog.
I feel like I lost a solid group of bros on my journey, and the stoke has been pretty
low, because now I feel like an expat with no home and nowhere to belong.
I'd love the dude's advice.
I'd like to add something else, my friends.
There is an amazingly cute, smart, funny girl at my college, practically the totes package
that I randomly run into at times.
We always make eyes at each other and smile, and I get the vibe she's me and i'm deafening her the splash is in the pond is the splash in the
pond is this i don't know her name or who she is how do i approach her to get her name and cuff
the girl of my dreams well dude i like how you're already kind of working past the issue and looking
to other things to get stoked on you know like a potential relation. And I appreciate that you work so hard
to get your back ready
and that, I'm sorry you had that setback,
but Phil Knight was like a college runner,
but what he's going to be remembered for
is starting Nike.
So you could have your big thing
that's defining in your future.
And I think with your industrious attitude,
it's definitely coming.
And with this gal,
I think you just got to walk up to her and say,
hey, I'm Swississ he signed it swiss and say hey i'm swiss what's up i think that's it and then from there you just roll with it that got me fired up i mean what else is there to say i want
to go to dairy queen now she's got hey hey i'm swiss how's it going hey do you mind if i bother
you for a second that's always a good one yeah hey do you's it going hey do you mind if i bother you for a second that's
always a good one yeah hey do you mind if i do you mind if i bug you for a second you know what
they always say they don't always say anything uh yeah dude i would you know what i always whenever
whenever i get uh fearful or you know i'm first off i'm sorry that you're going through this. It's a tough situation. But I always try to have the mindset that anything that happens, it's working in my favor.
No matter whether it is or it isn't.
If you have that mindset, like this is my path.
Everything that happens is something that is happening in my favor.
Even though it may look like the worst disaster in the world at the
moment just know that it is a stepping stone to great success in whatever field or mindset or
whatever thing that may be whatever direction you're headed yeah so you know i i totally uh
i feel for your situation my dog but um I would just look at this as a stepping
stone towards a new path
that's going to be even more epic like you were saying with the
Nike guy you know maybe
this is maybe you want to explore
the arts maybe you want to explore entrepreneurship
maybe you want to
build a bridge I don't know
maybe you want to like go like you know
be a riverboat captain in Idaho
Falls and know the river like the back of like you know be a riverboat captain yeah idaho falls yeah and know
the river like the back of your hand yeah and be like oh that rock's a little fun to bump off of
yeah don't go too fast because you flip right maybe you just want to take a raft down the
mississippi river like huck finn yeah this is a fresh start for you making friends on that trip
yeah aaron how you doing uh how do you mean just in general
oh dude talk about
that weirdo
oh yeah
I got a weird text
out of nowhere
it said
uh
I'll read to you
uh
in its entirety
let's see
this is pretty cuckoo bananas
hi Aaron
apologies for the message
out of the blue
I'm Ben
I'd like to speak to you
about purchasing
my home address
uh
do I have the right person
some guy just messaged
him was like yo i want to buy your house that's like the beginning of the movie enough with jlo
that guy turns out to be a psycho dude people who do stuff like that yeah but he's also the
rocketeer dude respect for sure for sure um yeah this is weird were you looking to sell your house
no i just bought it like a year and a half ago but he blocked the dude but i'm like that's kind of a bold move because the guy knows where you
live so he could just show up and knock and be like you block me you're freaking him out you
hurt my feelings did you block me well oh am i freaking you out my bad dude it's either that or
or i text him back and fuck with him and then he comes to my house and kills me so i mean like
you could just say it's not for sale.
Yeah, that's what I was going to say.
Yeah.
Even engaging at all.
You don't want to engage in a dialogue with this dude.
I want him to think,
oh, maybe I did have the wrong number.
You don't want to do that.
Or you could be aggressive.
Eat a dick, dude.
It's not for sale.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Eat a hot bowl of dicks.
You just get hammered and you write something to him.
You're like, bro,
you think I would ever sell you my house? You a clown dude yeah it's like a really i'm definitely
gonna buy your house well he's like a really genuine sweet guy and he's like hey man i just
would really like to purchase your house eat a hot bowl of dicks what that's motivating dude
that would send me on a journey of like getting enough purchasing power to make sure i made you eat those dicks yourself yeah metaphorically i'd spoon feed you
those dicks in escrow uh i just want to start off by saying i've been following you guys for a while
now and i love the pod and gram content i recently went bleached for the reef and got a lawnmower 2.0
and got both of my domes have never looked more fresh oh fire dude thank you dude please keep me anonymous anyways i'll get right to it's a long
one i'm in my final year at college and i've been on and off with this one girl since sophomore year
it started off as just hooking up casually but then transformed into a relationship we've broken
up and i've gotten back together about three times since then and we're currently on that bf gf page
again but recently i've had feelings of not wanting to be around her. I'm not trying to be an
asshole because I do genuinely care for her, but
I had a realization that maybe our personalities don't match.
She's very loud in public and doesn't mind
bringing attention to herself and has even gone so
far as yelling at guys for staring at her for a little
too long when we're together. I'm more laid back
and generally don't like to be the center of attention, especially
in public situations involving strangers.
She also has a tendency to talk over me in
group conversations, which really gets on my nerves,
mainly because I never try to do that to anyone,
especially her.
Also,
she recently almost got into a fistfight with a guy at a bar for touching
her shoulder and asking if she had a boyfriend,
which eventually got her kicked out.
I was on the other side of the bar with my boy at the time and
essentially got my night ruined as I had to apologize to her friend group
and leave with her.
This is not something I want to deal with constantly because it happens
enough to the point where I generally don't want to be around her in social settings, praying she doesn't cause
a scene. And when I tell her something like, Hey, I just want to be with the guys tonight,
she ends up annoyed and it becomes another thing I have to deal with. So recently I've been lying
to her saying stuff like, Oh, I got too fucked up to come over or telling her I'm not going to
party where I am. So she doesn't come. And I just have time with the boys. Does this make me an
asshole? I seriously do care about her, but there are points where I can't stand being around her.
What do I do?
We have shared some magical moments together
where I think to myself,
this is the one I want to be with,
but she does crazy shit enough for me to rethink those times
and put more weight into the bad than the good.
I am just not ready for a girlfriend,
or is this girl just not the one for me?
Please help, bros.
My dog, I think you answered the question with that quesh.
I mean, it doesn't sound like it's a good fit.
Yeah, dude, I agree with Chad.
Yeah.
I mean, I totally understand that feeling where you have these special moments
and you go back on them and you're like, oh, I can't give that up.
But then I think if you look at the bigger picture,
if you're at a place where you're actively ignoring her
and coming up with excuses not to hang out with her
and she's causing trouble
for you socially and uh she talks over him is that what you said yeah stuff like that then uh
you know i think you got to rip that band-aid off and i think i'm gonna venture a guess i think
you'll feel much better when you do yeah dude if it was just the talking over you thing i'd be like okay talk
to her about that that's something she can work on but she's doing so many things that are too
much to deal with and that and that don't seem like easily fixable it sounds like she needs to
do some pretty serious work on herself. Yeah. You know? Yeah.
I don't.
And it's just not the right fit.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I think you are not an asshole at all.
I think you sound like a really nice guy.
Yeah.
And you're a little in over your head with this girl.
And, you know, you can say goodbye kindly and with love but and i know people like that they're charming they're charismatic and they can fill you full of life but she doesn't
have it regulated enough she doesn't have control of the bull the bull's got control of her and you
don't want to go along for that ride because you're gonna get you're just to be an externality. Yeah.
Oh, what was I going to say?
God damn it.
My dog.
Oh, I forgot it.
What were you talking about? You were talking about the bowl.
Like just that she doesn't have control of her chaos, really.
Yeah, and this is what I was going to say.
I think you need to start in the most
respectful way putting yourself first a little bit um because you gotta look at if you're not happy
then it's just gonna be an unpleasant experience for everyone and i think you gotta be in charge
of your own happiness and take control of that and if there's someone in your life that's dragging you down
and making you feel down in the dumps,
like you're at the bottom of the well and you can't get out
and you want to get pokey, I think you've got to say,
you know what, I've got to put myself first in this situation.
So this was a really nice experience, but I'm going to go fish for marlin.
Yeah, let's get you on your way to sweet fin pokey.
Yeah.
Yeah.
All right.
What up, Chad and JT?
I wanted to preface this by saying your pod is super hype and is my favorite to listen to by far.
Thanks, man.
So basically my stoke levels have been super low for the past couple of months because I've had to be on the school and work grind almost nonstop. When I do get to hang with the boys, it's always
the same stuff, just pounding brews, smoking up and going to parties. But I never feel stoked
about any of it. I feel like I do the same things every day and I'm not moving forward. I guess my
question is how do I raise my stoke levels when I don't have much of anything to be stoked on at
the moment? Appreciate you boys. Ian. My dog, um uh sounds like you're stuck in a rager rut um
and uh you know sometimes you can rage too much and when raging becomes your whole life then you
lose the stoke for the rage i think you need to find uh you need to diversify your bonds and by
that i mean you need to find other things to do in your life you know some
extracurricular activities find a mission for yourself so that you can earn those celebrations
so it's not just what you do you know i think for me personally i think my key to happiness
is when i'm making progress when i'm learning things when i'm developing myself and becoming
a better dude so i think if you can find a mission for yourself
that you can dedicate yourself to,
whether it's in the workforce or something else,
I think that will expand your life
and make you much happier.
Excellent.
I also think, my dude, that you're just worn out.
You know, you've been on the school and work grind nonstop,
and then every weekend you're getting after it partying.
That's all stuff that takes a lot of energy.
And I think you probably like partying,
but just the repetition of it has made it feel like a chore to you.
So I think if you just take one weekend,
like after you hear this, you just take that weekend just for yourself.
Just force yourself to stay in, watch some movies, read some shits,
maybe, you know, do some self-love.
Yeah.
And then just recharge your batteries.
And then I think you'll go into the next week and be like, oh, yeah, I do like actually hanging out with my boys and after a little bit.
It's just you need variety.
All right.
Last question.
You and JT rock.
I wish I was like you.
I'm a 50-year-old bro,
and I just realized I've never partied in my entire life.
All I've done is work and eat a lot of doo-doo.
Can you help me?
I want to learn how to party.
I even have a cool biz now that won't work either.
If you're a real bro, please help a fellow bro
to no longer be a loser.
Peace, Sean.
I'm a dude. What do you want? Sean I mean dude
what do you want
you want the shortcut
to getting after it
because we all know
what that is
just go out
get hammered
you know
but you want to really know
how to really dig deep
and party
there's only one
important step to take
and that's the first one
just get in there
get in there
and don't have ideas
of what it means to party
because it's different for everybody.
And you figure that out one party at a time.
You go to a party, you feel awkward.
You stay at that party.
You sit in that discomfort.
How do you get invited to the party?
People at work, you join some rec ball leagues.
You just go to bars.
And slowly but surely, you discover how you party.
What makes you you at the party?
Are you the dancing guy?
Are you the conversation guy?
Are you the guy who's good at mixing drinks?
You'll figure it out.
I can't really add anything to that.
I mean, that was perfect.
I would just say on top of that,
don't eat doo-doo.
Yeah, stop eating doo-doo.
That's gonna make you feel terrible.
Yeah, doo-doo's no good.
And he says,
a business that sucks
he says i even have a cool biz now but that won't work either yeah uh he's got a cool biz
i don't know a little more optimism i mean you know put some heart and soul into your biz
while you're pounding beer bongs dude um maybe roll up a fat blunt and do your taxes combine the two
try things out be spontaneous
you know
get a
get a tin of skull
throw in a fat dap
and think of a new marketing plan
and then if the thought of eating doo doo
comes to your mind again say no
no more doo doo
stay out doo doo
I'm giving you homework bro I want you to go comes to your mind again, say no. No more doo-doo. Stay out, doo-doo.
I'm giving you homework, bro.
I want you to go to a bar that has a dance floor,
and I want you to get on that floor,
and I want you to dance by yourself
for three songs.
Maybe if you're looking for a move,
best one to go to is hip gyrations.
Drink in hand, hands up, gyrate your hips.
Let everyone know that you may be 50 years old,
but you can still move those hips.
People will talk to you.
If you hip gyrate, they will talk to you.
People are attracted to freedom.
So just try and work towards being free
and you can't get there in a day so don't put that pressure we underestimate we overestimate
what we can do in one year and underestimate what we can do in five years bill gates talking about
fucking raging that's what the fuck he was talking about that's what the fuck i'm talking about when
i talk to bill gates i talked to him about raging windows 95 that celebration when they were all
all those geeks were up there getting after steve bomber dude just raging the bomber
bill gates is worth something of a billion dollars and he gyrated his hips and so can you dude
that freaking nerd got down on the dance floor and now he's serving up cricket protein for the world.
He's a nerd.
I get a lot of respect for him.
Alright, Chad.
Who is your Beef of the Week?
My Beef of the Week is the shark
that attacked Mick Fanning.
This was a few years ago.
Okay, thank God. He's okay. Good. The white lightning is okay. The shark that attacked Mick Fanning. This was a few years ago.
Okay, thank God.
He's okay.
Good.
The white lightning is okay.
That's his nickname.
Rip Curl.
So I'm going to take you guys on the scene.
2000, I believe, 15, Jay Bay.
That's Jeffries Bay in South Africa. Mick Fanning was out there in a heat with Julian Wilson.
It was the finals of the Jay-Bay competition I believe it was
the Billabong Pro
Mick Fanning
sitting out there just being the white lightning
being like you know I'm the fastest surfer in the
water I know I can crush this
heat even though I'm going up against Julian
who is a prodigy and looks
really good
and unbeknownst to him a freaking Julian who is a prodigy and looks really good and
unbeknownst to him
a freaking shark comes up
and pulls on his leash
and you see a fin come out of the water
on the live webcast
and you see a fin come out of the water
and McFanning gets pulled down a little bit
and you see him freak out and then he gets pulled
underwater and then
you see McFanning then he gets pulled underwater and then you see mick fanning fist
flying he's attacking the shark whoa he's in full karate mode muay thai jujitsu freaking uh tai chi
he is attacking this shark just beating the fuck out of it and he came away unscathed
dude no podcast in history has talked more about human versus beast fighting than this one today.
That's right.
Put it in the Hall of Fame, dudes.
And Mick, it's going to be your photo, dude.
So my beef was with that shark, although I do love sharks.
There's a huge stigma around sharks, and I support them, and I love them.
But this shark in particular,
he messed up the finals,
dude.
and then Julian Wilson showed his true colors as a epic bro.
You know what Julian Wilson did when the shark attacked McFanning?
He recognized what was going on.
He paddled toward the shark.
Whoa.
So I'm going to help out my dog.
And he was paddling towards the shark, working his lats.
And then the shark swam away.
Because he got socked in the nose.
That's what's up.
So that's my beef.
What's your beef?
Dude, my beef of the week is a personal one.
So Chad and I are working on a project.
And we're at an office, which is kind of weird to be at an office, but we dig it.
You know, it's got good vibes.
And today everyone came dressed in Halloween costumes.
And then there was a vote to pick what was the best Halloween costume.
And then I look at what my outfit is described as,
and it says 80s bro.
So for a little context,
Chad and I are the biggest bros at this office so that's not my costume
i'm jane fonda aerobics instructor from the 80s they just wrote me as 80s bro
which was super demeaning dude it was straight up racist i was like 80s bro i didn't make a big
deal about it because you know you got to keep your chin up and just just keep you know don't let him see his sweat but i added i was about to cross out bro but
i realized that'd be too dramatic of a move you know it'd be like i hate my own self so i just
wrote 80s bro dance instructor and added that but i did not like how people just took my costume at
superficial value we're just like oh he's a bro so he's being an 80s bro you know yeah i was
being it's messed up i've been a 2019 bro in a costume it's messed up dude people judged you
it's like yeah dude it's like yeah bro yeah bro can i just be a dance instructor yeah can it just say dance instructor yeah aaron like what's up dude yeah and what's up
with what i mean but like everything like did i get like discriminated on a little bit
disrespected oh yeah oh yeah dude dude oh yeah if i didn't have bleach blonde hair
and uh this voice and just that face that i make where i'm
like what and that cool vibe oh dude and that stoke oh man you're spending it positive thank
you dude because i was i was feeling so negative about it you know well bro sometimes it feels like
people aren't seeing the whole me well bro is what you make it that's so true you could be a You could be a bro, but the only reason they think you're a bro is because you have a cool vibe.
Yeah.
But then you throw out some Edgar Allen Poe, and they're like, damn, bro, this guy knows Poe.
And that rhymes.
All right, Chad, who is your babe of the week?
My babe of the week is Ed Catmule.
Ed Catmule is a freaking dude who is the president of Pixar and Disney Animation.
Pixar Animation and Disney Animation.
I'm listening to his book right now, and he is just a beast.
He is a guy who had a dream.
I'm going to make an animated movie with computers,
and I'm going to realize animated movie with computers and i'm gonna realize this dream
through thick and thin i'm just gonna be a freaking bat in a cave and i'm gonna come and
reach the light and i'm gonna turn into a dove or an eagle and soar high with a bug's life and toy
story um yeah he just tells a story about you know how he started with his dream and then he
started working with steve jobs steve jobs would come at him hard and he'd be like look i got this
great idea i'm gonna take your job it's gonna be awesome and he'd be like you know what steve i
don't think that's the best idea i have my vision i want to work with you but you know don't just take my job um and he uh he stuck it out stayed in the thick of it and then came out
with toy story and then just dominated and then he's just on a path but he's been analyzing his
path through thick you know um you know just constantly learning constantly re-ingesting
what do i need to do better what can what values do we have as a company you know what's working what's not who do we need to can um and uh i think one of the most epic things he's talking about is he's
like you know people in this industry they preach about the importance of ideas what reigns supreme
is ideas story is most important he's he's like, I get that.
But I'm going to argue that people are most important.
It's the team.
Because where do ideas come from?
People.
Yep.
So he just seems like a really solid, good dude
who's brought us some epic hits.
I mean, Toy Story, that changed my world, dude.
I never looked at my Slinky the same way.
So, Ed Catmull, you're a babe.
Dude, Hampton Young has the best Toy Story joke
where he says he has a friend who invited him over one time
and, like, fucked a Hulk Hogan doll.
And then he said his friend would fuck him all the time.
And then he's like, can you imagine if Toy Story was real and the hulkster just walks over everybody goes hey we got to kill this fucking kid it might be my favorite joke
of all time yeah i remember that'd be my favorite joke of all time he's into some weird shit and
he's a freak the hulk yeah oh we got to this fucking kid brother that's a dark toy store yeah um dude my baby of the week is this guy at the gym tonight so
i went to uh this gym to box and just like hit the bag and then um we were doing some rounds
near each other and i went up to him and i was like hey dude do you want to put on your music
because i was playing like r&b like i had brian mcknight back to one playing which is like
a super romancey song and not really something he'd box to but he gets me hyped and then he was
like i'm like hey dude i know my music's kind of weird you want to put on your stuff he goes
nah dude it's nice good change of pace and he's like and be weird dude be we be you be weird
and i was like thanks man so i went back to hitting the bag and he got me motivated because
he was doing extra bag work not taking breaks in between the bell and so he i did a couple extra rounds because of him
and then as i was leaving i was just like you know what i like to spar on thursdays at muay thai but
i couldn't make it on time today so i just was like hey dude do you want to get in the ring and
spar is that weird he's like no let's do it and then we just went in there and we sparred for a
couple rounds and he he totally uh bested me but he was chill about he didn't throw too much he was
a little cocky afterwards but hey you got to be like that. He was stinging me. And I got a really good workout and I was
dying afterwards. And then he's like, hey dude, it's only weird if like I've never seen you before
in the gym and you ask, it's like your first day and you ask to spar people. And I was like, yeah,
that is weird. If it's your first day in the gym, you're like, hey man, you want to get in the ring
and fight? Yeah. Yeah. That's too much. But we had seen each other in there a bunch. And so he knew
I was like mellow and we just had a
really nice time uh punching each other so uh it was really cool and he's just a nice guy he teaches
pilates i might go check out his class now nice yeah just a good dude did he land any on your face
uh not too much we were going pretty soft and mostly focusing on the body but yeah he hit me
with a couple jabs and stuff yeah yeah he was just he had defense. Like every time I'd poke him in one of his arms,
wherever the opening was, he would slot in a punch.
Yeah.
And I realized, I was like, oh, this guy is just technically better than me.
Yeah.
But I think if I keep working, I'll be able to get some shots on him.
How long have you been boxing?
A couple of years now.
Yeah.
Didn't mean anything when I fought that 6, 7-hander.
Only a couple of years now?
Yeah, just a couple of years.
I did it a little bit when I was in my teens.
And I did karate growing up.
But yeah, just a couple years.
But I feel good right now.
And it's fun throwing kicks because it gives my shoulders some relief.
And I feel like it tones up the body more.
Yeah.
I enjoyed fake sparring with you at the office today.
That was fun, yeah.
Yeah.
It's just a great feeling, right?
When you're dancing around, throwing shots.
Yeah.
And I hugged you after we did it once because I really feel close to people after i was trying to go with the grab that they do yeah you were clenching
is that what it's called yeah i uh yeah i i've never really been attracted to the sport but
every time i kind of do it i'm like this is fun yeah jack's uh all right chad who is your legend
of the week my legend of the week is my new apartment.
Congrats, my dog.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Yeah, I signed the lease on a new apartment.
I'm moving in around Thanksgiving.
Most of the thing I'm fired up about is it has a balcony with ample sunnage.
So there's going to be lots of sun coming on me at all times.
It's a brand new building.
I got fire appliances.
I got in-unit washer and dryer, which I'm stoked on, and central air.
So all the things that I envisioned for my apartment have come to life.
So I'm really stoked on it.
I can't wait to bronze on that balcony.
Maybe I'll put a hammock out there.
Maybe I'll put a table out there.
Maybe I'll put a grill out there. i'll put a grill out there i don't know the possibilities are endless so that's why my legend of the week is my new apartment
love it dude i'm so jacked to come visit you there that'd be cool and it's been a good
search and like it the place looks badass man it yeah. Yeah. Maybe I'll get a dog. Yeah.
What kind of doggy?
I mean, I love golden retrievers.
I want a golden retriever.
That's nice, dude.
Aaron, what kind of doggy do you think I should get?
Dude.
You're pretty active.
Yeah.
Super active. But you're not home all that much.
Right.
You're never home.
Shit.
That's tough.
I'm thinking after this project we're working on
i'll be home more but no you won't yeah you're gonna be even busier damn it so you might want
to go smaller than retriever i can't do that dude i can't do it aaron i can't say it to him
it's not my place but i appreciate you coming in with it you know what i really like uh as a beagle
oh dude cute dog but you know what the thing about beagles are
they're explorers yeah that's true oh dude oh wow that's cute my dad had a beagle they're cuties uh
like a pocket beagle is is a smaller version of one it's pretty cool but they're explorers so they
they they get lost sometimes they venture yeah but i think a pocket one's not going to venture as far.
It might just go to the next floor down.
Yeah.
Plus, they've got tracking beacons and shit now.
Yeah.
Dude, my dad's girlfriend's dog is a golden retriever.
Sweaty, slobbering, lovely guy.
He just ruined my jeans one day.
I'm still pissed.
But he just goes trash pillaging at night.
They just let him run away, and then my dad's like, hey, we got to find the dog.
And then like two miles away, he's just in someone's backyard.
And they're like, Wilson, get in the car.
I'm like, this guy just roams free.
It's like in a gang, one man gang.
Wilson.
JT Wilson's gone again.
He's dumpster diving.
We think he's behind the restaurant.
Plunk, come with me.
I'm like, how about you just keep
the dog in the yard but my dad's like come on he needs to run it's good for him yeah yeah i like
guys encouraging him to be free yeah for sure yeah that's the thing i don't want to i don't
want to confine a golden retriever to an apartment that seems cruel but maybe you'll make time for it
and the places we're working are going to let you bring your dog right yeah yeah and don't and
you're going to train your dog because like yeah and don't and you're gonna train
your dog because like dude when i was in an office manager and people would bring in their wildling
dogs and they would just like thrash phones and piss and shit everywhere and i'd be like hey chief
just uh ripped up another phone and they'd be like chief no chief never does stuff like that
i'm like chief does that every day you gotta open your eyes to
the reality of who your dog is all right i was always like you know what i'm just gonna bring
like my most fucked up family member who's got like the worst problems i'm just gonna bring him
into work one time yeah like what what what's wrong with max just let him do what he wants he's a good
guy like max stole all of our spoons again you know to do heroin off of them like oh not max he doesn't do stuff like that um all right dude my legend of the week is uh inspired by mcfanning it's
christine zanawi remember we looked at this lady like a week ago she is a shark whisperer right
like legit can communicate with sharks in ways that no other human can. I mean, is it verbal?
Is it nonverbal?
It's probably nonverbal.
She can like tickle their bellies and rub their backs with like tiger sharks, scary
looking creatures.
And she's just a total piece of them.
She wears chain mail.
But you got to watch the video on YouTube.
Just say woman is a shark whisperer.
Type that in.
And she's like petting them.
And then the coolest part is they get hook stuck in their mouths from like bad fishermen and she started pulling the hooks out and once she
did it to a couple sharks more sharks started showing up with hooks in their mouth so she's
literally their resident dentist i mean how cool is like how do you even get into that walk of life
where that's what you're doing. You just follow your bliss.
Get out there.
She gets out there.
And it's unbelievable just watching her tickle a shark's belly.
Yeah, she like works them into it.
She like pets them,
then she just shoves her whole arm up their mouth.
Yeah.
And they're like, ah, I love this.
Yeah, she's helping.
She's literally sticking her arm
in the most dangerous place it could go.
Yeah.
And so far they're trusting her.
She hugs sharks.
Very cool.
That's awesome.
Chad, what is your quote of the week?
Okay.
Rafiki comes in hot in Lion King when he's giving Simba some tough love.
And he goes, you know, he's trying to convince Simba to come back
to become the rightful
king that he is. And he goes,
oh yes, the past can hurt.
Oh yes, the past can hurt.
But from the way I see it,
you can either run from it, or
learn from it.
That's from Rafiki.
Rafiki.
It's hard to look back. Well don't remember it so i'm good
mine is from the movie ransom with mel gibson we were talking about it somewhere
and uh someone he's like a rich uh airline ceo and uh someone kidnaps his son and then he just
decides to take matters into his own hand i can't remember if
this is before or after he says look i've got two million dollars and you're never going to see any
of it i'm putting this money towards whoever captures you so get used to running but this
might be before he makes that call so he's talking to the guy who has his son and who is obviously a
psychopath on the phone and uh he goes is it dark where you're calling from got the shades down
kind of like a cellar right like a cave well you better get used to that you better get it you And he goes, Who do you think you're dealing with? Give me the money. Fuck you and your two million. Don't you understand English, you useless piece of shit?
No money.
None.
Let me tell you something.
You think you're suffering now, huh?
You got no idea what suffering is.
If I don't get the cash in one hour, this kid isn't dead.
I don't get my son back.
I mean, real soon, you better kill yourself.
Because when I catch up with you, I'm going to take my goddamn time.
By the time we're finished, you're going to wish you weren't born.
I'll have your head on a fucking pike.
Do you understand me?
Fuck you.
I'll fucking kill him right now.
You kill him, you kill yourself, you motherfucker.
Give me back my son.
And then he drops the phone.
He goes, ah, ah.
Dude, he had to play hardball with these kidnappers.
I like it.
I dig it.
It's as intense as some of his later phone calls.
Yeah.
Oh, dude.
Oh, dude, good ref.
Yeah.
Controverse.
Controverse. Hasverse hashtag alcoholism thank you for bringing your big hog energy to this yeah dude for real dude you're welcome
um do you have a quote do you have a line for getting after it
let's ask aaron i love that dude dude that would be cool if people say that like if people hey
let's ask aaron and all right i'm down to party yeah yeah it's deserving uh mine is uh you know
people say and then i cried like a bitch let's change it up cried like a beast legend animals
cry in touch with the emotion yeah animals cry i cried like a fucking
beast last night dude yeah dude my grandma said something kind of rude to me and i just got home
thought about it for an hour and i just cried like a beast then the boys hit me up and i was like
let's ask aaron let's ask aaron dude did you just bring a 30 rack to this? Let's ask Aaron, dude That makes me want to cry like a beast, dude
Oh, Randy, did you come in with a beer bong and a freaking volcano?
Throwback, dude, let's ask Aaron
Let's ask Aaron, dude
Dude, did you come here to rage?
Let's ask Aaron
Pedro, did you just fly in from San Francisco?
Let's ask Aaron Dude, is this herpes on from San Francisco let's ask Aaron
dude is this herpes on my dong
let's ask Aaron
dude it burns when I pee
let's ask Aaron
dude did I get too fucked up last night
and take a shit on my ex girlfriend's
dad's bed
let's ask Aaron
dude I fucked my whole
Kogan doll and he started talking to me let's ask Aaron dude Dude, I fucked my Hulk Hogan doll and he started talking to me.
Let's ask Aaron.
Dude, did I purchase an assault rifle and try to assassinate the president?
Let's ask Aaron.
Dude, did I wrestle the president for the keys to the nukes?
Let's ask Aaron, dude.
Dude, we heard that there's a philosophical thing where for the nukes,
that they want to put the keys inside of a guy so that the guy who activates the nukes has to kill someone before
he does it so he knows what he's doing he's killing people yeah i can see that let's ask
aaron do you think that's a good idea let's ask aaron should we nuke these people the answer is probably no but let's ask aaron aaron are you ever down for nuking
yeah your hard pass on the new hard pass on the new in fact not cool with previous nukes
oh dang dude it would be pretty funny if we got to a point with guns i'm not even trying to be
political here i'm just having fun with an extrapolation. If we got to a place with guns where you could buy nukes,
everyone's like, don't take my nukes
from me.
Look, I gotta protect myself
from the tyranny of a
irresponsible government. I need
my nuclear warheads. You take
my nukes, what's next? You take my
house, you take my liberties, you take my freedom?
You wanna take my nukes? Yeah, you wanna take
my nukes over my dead keys dude let's just let's just hypothetical wise all right you say i should
have less than 20 nukes where does it end sometimes then you're gonna say i shouldn't have 15 nukes
then 10 nukes now you got one nuke now you're gonna take my nuke how are we gonna fight back
the government we don't have no nukes and you've told me you could pry my nuke out How are we going to fight back the government when we don't have no nukes? You could pry my nuke out of my
glowing dead hand.
Out of my radioactive palm.
I'm holding plutonium
right now in my palm because that is my
God-given right.
And yeah, I got no pubes left.
I can't even manscape no more.
But I'm protected. I have a phrase for getting after
it too while we're... Hit us, dude.
Apropos of today, let's go ring some doorbells
And get that candy
It's Halloween dude
I guess we're not big Halloween guys
But I love that phrase
Enjoy your Halloween guys
Alright dude
Good talking with you man
Aaron good talking with you brother
Boom clap
Leave some reviews Stokers thank you
Yeah leave some reviews I love those
And I'm always comparing us to other podcasts
Gilbert Gottfried has the same amount of reviews
He probably deserves it he's a legend
If you need advice
These guys are really nice
You wanna know
What to do
Where to go
When you need someone to guide you
Just a half-hearted style
You're going free
You're going free
That's the deal Go free Let's go deep
Go in deep
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