Going Deep with Chad and JT - Ep 120 - Cory Loykasek Joins!
Episode Date: March 11, 2020What up Stokers! On this episode we're joined by Cory Loykasek, we talk about his sketch group the Dress Up Gang, Burning Man, and his revolutionary idea, the party 5. Sponsored by Manscaped: Get 20% ...Off and Free Shipping with the code GODEEP20 at Manscaped.com. Clean up your nuts!
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all right headphones on we're ready to roll what's up stokers of stoke nation this is chad
kroger coming in with the going deep chat and jt, before we begin, I want to remind you once again
that we are brought to you by Manscaped.
Manscaped, thank you so much for keeping our trims pubed,
for looking after our hogs,
for making sure that our dongs are looking fresh and clean.
Because when you go down a neighborhood
and you see a lawn that's freshly cut,
what do you think?
Hell yeah.
That guy has good pubes. Hell yeah so and you can achieve that you
can be that guy in the neighborhood if you get a lawnmower 3.0 only at manscape we were at nascar
this weekend we saw a manscape car yeah that was insane um so manscape is entering the nascar game
trimming the racers pubes so you know they're doing big things,
and we want you guys to be in the same arena.
So use code godeep20 at manscaped.com.
And Corey, have you manscaped recently?
No, probably should.
What is the product?
What does it do?
It's a razor?
It's a specifically designed trimmer for your pubic region,
and it has like a guard on it that makes it practically impossible
to nick yourself uh okay yeah state of the art top of the line finest in the biz make your pubes
look well groomed and prepared for any kind of presentation all pubes all pubes all pubes yeah
um yeah ladies are welcome okay even though it's calledped, but, you know. He's got pubes, too.
Go on, dust your shoulders off.
Yeah.
A pube is a pube, I guess.
A pube by any other name.
I mean, I probably should trim him.
Has it been a minute?
It's been a minute.
What's your go-to method?
Just scissors.
Oh, yeah, you use scissors.
I'm a scissors guy, too.
But it's last minute.
It's only once in a while.
Yeah.
I find you're just like, it's been a couple months. You look a while yeah i find you're just like it's been a
couple months you look down you go you know what it's time like a lot of stuff is just feel for me
like my fingernails my pubes it's all just i just look and i'm not on a schedule i just look and i
go it's time yeah i'm a nail biter so that's just kind of i pick yeah no you pick yeah i've i've
always wanted to be sponsored so i've been manscaping every day that's amazing you say
you manscape multiple times a day, right?
If I have the time, you know.
Like clean off?
Yeah.
I mean, sometimes, you know, I just go wherever it directs me.
Like the other day, I just did my whole torso.
Hairless like a dolphin.
Yeah.
Sexy.
Yeah.
I mean, is that a thing that should I be doing that?
I don't even know.
I don't hear requests.
What do you want? What are you looking to do?
Just fit in.
Just have a good time.
I don't know.
I've never shaved it all the way.
Trimmed once in a while at requests.
Yeah, I feel like you have natural pheromones, though, so you don't need, like, you with hair in the chest all region and dongle
yeah
and I don't have
a very hairy chest
so I gotta kind of
compensate maybe down there
and you guys are like
different
you guys are both sexy
but you guys are doing it
in different ways
right right
thank you
yeah right
yeah
for sure
so I'm here with my
compadre
John Thomas
what up
boom clap stokers
and we're here with our
our buddy comic writer
actor
Corey Lukasik what's up oh very
nice dude that's nice yeah very cool dude you adapted quickly to that no one else has been
that quick on the draw okay every time you come on people are gonna expect that that's what's up
oh dude uh well thanks for coming on. Thanks for having me.
Good to see you guys again.
Yeah, it's good to see you too, dude.
We've had a little break.
We were hanging out a ton.
Yep.
We were working on a project together.
Yep.
You were just a beast in so many respects.
You know, great with the ideas, but also just a very solid hang.
Oh, yeah.
Great with the vibes.
Fun project to work on.
A lot of good people.
Good time.
And I've just been spending a lot of days by myself. Oh, nice. You know, which is good. Doing a lot of good writing, things and i've just been spending a lot of days by myself
oh no you know it's just it was just good doing a lot of good writing things like that but it's
not as fun well yeah how do you know how do you enjoy the solitude how do you dude that's exactly
what i was gonna ask okay okay i was gonna say yeah yeah yeah okay i i don't like it i'm a i'm
a you're still an extrovert i'm a social guy. I can write by myself for a little bit, but then I get a little just stir crazy.
Right.
You know, you feed off everybody's energy really well.
Yeah.
I don't do well by myself.
Yeah, yeah.
I'm the same way.
Like, once it gets to, like, 10 o'clock at night, I start getting this, like, nervous feeling.
Yeah.
I start getting, like, scared.
I'm like, and I'm like, I know it's okay to be tired and I should just get ready for bed.
But then I'm like, no, I got to go out and I got to, like, talk to people.
And I got to bounce my crazy off people to level down a little bit there's an
old uh maya angelou and dave chappelle interviewing each other on that iconic last show yeah and she
was talking about wanting to write by herself in a hotel room in a place she's never been and
he's like oh that's crazy because i just like to like write at parties i could never do that
right until that i was like oh i didn't even know that was an option that's an option yeah i felt like i should have to sit down at a wooden desk and just think yeah this is not how i
how i go they had some weird pairings on that show yeah i only saw actually only had that one
even paraphrased to me and that's how impactful it was oh nice so hopefully i'm right they'd be
like it's mario battaglia and lenny kravitz on this episode i know and then you're like how do
you guys even know each other exists? Yeah. Yeah.
Interesting.
Yeah, I'm the opposite.
Actually, I saw you like a few weeks, so it was Caroline's birthday and he came out to the bungalow.
Oh, nice.
Oh, yeah.
The bungalow.
Good spot.
And I was hammered.
A lot of times when I drink, I'm like, all right, I'm going to go to my place and sit
alone and just like gather myself and then I'll be back out.
Yeah.
I don't really remember leaving but uh dude you you you were like clearly hammered but so nice oh really
you're just like man dude it's so good you're here man this guy hey have you met this person
and you were just being so nice and you left i was like i think you should go but i don't want
you to go oh dude that's nice thank you it go. Oh, dude, that's nice. Thank you. It's good to hear. Because you always get that. I always get that next day anxiety.
I'm like, what did I do?
You were just really nice.
I'm like, oh, okay, cool, cool.
Yeah.
Well, at the company, when we finished the project and we all parted, yeah, I didn't
remember going home on that one.
And the next day I was like, oh, fuck.
You said something hilarious to me.
You had someone coming to pick you up.
Yeah.
I was like, dude, why don't you just have a glass of water before you leave?
And then he looked at me and he go, dude, I know what you're doing, but I'm good.
You're like, I appreciate what you're doing, but I'm good.
There's something about being drunk where you're just so paranoid that people see through you.
Or something like that.
You never want to admit that you need water.
No, but it was cool the way you said it.
I was like, he'll be all right.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I was fine.
Yeah, my friend was like, how?
She goes, did you have a good time?
And I guess I said, you know, hold on.
Let me think about that for a second.
And I just passed out.
Dude, I was stressed out that night.
Maybe it was something my therapist said.
It was like my fear of goodbyes.
But that night I got super anxious.
I had to go outside, do push-ups, and run some sprints just to like relax a little bit.
That's pretty good self-care.
Yeah, it's true.
How do you know you need to do that?
I was just like, I think if I work out, I always feel better after I work out.
So I was like, if I just get my blood flowing a little bit, I'll be right back to where I need to be.
I drink too much caffeine.
I was thinking lately, like, what if I subbed every cup of coffee with like 20 push-ups?
Yeah.
Would that do it?
Something like that?
I think so.
Yeah, it's not as fun,
but I think you'll get to the same place.
Yeah.
There's something about a cup of coffee
or a drink where you're like,
it's the promise.
Right.
It's like, man,
it's going to make me feel so good.
Even though you know it's not going to.
It's like a lotto ticket.
It's the excitement going into it.
Yeah.
I haven't had caffeine in months.
I was going to have a cup of tea tonight to perk me up. I'd like to see it. You haven't had caffeine in months i was gonna have a cup of tea tonight to perk me up i'd like to see it you
haven't had it's been months dude i haven't smoked pot or done caffeine in months wow yeah yeah this
is me i feel really good i'm starting to get a little bored like i want to mix it up a little
bit but uh but actually i feel very much myself which is kind of nice i think i was smoking so
much pot there for a while that I was like, I wasn't actually
being myself.
Yeah.
So?
Like, I was just, I don't know.
It's interesting.
It just felt like there was, like, it feels like there's not as many barriers between
what I'm actually feeling and thinking and what's coming out of my mouth.
Okay.
And when I was smoking a ton of pot, it felt like I had to, like, fight through this, like,
maze to get to what I was thinking and feeling.
And now I'm like, no, no, the cheese is right there, bro.
Just grab it.
Yeah.
That is interesting.
I feel like with caffeine, booze, any of those vices, it is so different for everybody.
Yeah.
Like weed, for me, puts me right there.
Yeah.
Sometimes it can do that for me, but it stopped doing that for a little bit.
Yeah.
Yeah.
But no, it is, when weed works great, it's like- like feels good i got promoted at a job because i was smoking weed like i was not that
cool and then i started smoking weed and then at lunch i was just killing and then they were like
we want to keep this guy do you ever have that where you do something with one of those and you
go shoot i think i was a better person or like the other night i spoke to me with some friends
and i was like i feel so fun and interesting i was just having all these cool thoughts, you know, and I don't want that to work, but
sometimes it does.
But do you think that's you just self-evaluating yourself differently when you're inebriated?
Like, you're going easier on yourself, but actually everybody else are like, no, it's
the same Corey.
I think it's probably like sober, just a little more cynical and critical of anything, including
your own thoughts, at least for me.
So like something that I laugh at when I'm smoking during the day,
I'd probably just be like, let's do that.
Shut up.
Yeah, shut up.
That's funny, but it doesn't actually make sense because of this reason.
Yeah, right, right.
I found that with boozing because I took a break from boozing.
And I always had this thought.
I'm like, I feel great, but then I had this thought i'm like i'm like i'm like i feel great but then like
i had this this thing inside me where i um i was just like man i just need to let people see my
wild side you know like i need to booze and then i started boozing jt's like you're like the same
but you just talk slower a little bit and i'm like damn like i thought i was so cool no i was like i
just like you seem yeah you just seemed happier when you were sober.
You were like, I love drinking.
I feel so happy.
And I was like, you seem happier when we're just driving in your car at like 8 a.m.
Well, I think part of me.
So good.
Well, it's funny too with him because like he was doing his juice cleanse for like a week.
And he was like, yeah, today's the day where I feel miserable.
So I'm sorry if I'm off, guys.
And he had like the biggest smile on his face.
I was like, you don't seem bad at all.
Well, that's the thing.
I have this thing, which I'm sure most people do.
It's like, because I did, like, a juice cleanse, so I was doing no caffeine, just nothing.
How many days?
I did six.
Damn.
And I'll feel great, you know.
I'm like, yeah, I'm buzzing.
I'm feeling good.
But then, like, I have this, like, desire have this like desire for like destruction like self-destruction where i'm like yeah i need to like get fucked up
or like go get a jewel or something and just get buzzed but like then i'll then i'll like do stuff
like that and i'm like it's not that cool but i don't know what the technical term for that is
but it's like this like this memory thanos yeah they call it
thanos yeah i feel like what i realize is i i'm always wanting to get let's get another drink
let's do it but partly it's because i just want the whole vibe to be fun right and i feel like
if we're all drinking it's that yeah that is and lately i've been like oh it's not that i like
drinking i like it when everyone else is drinking right and just having fun and doing that yeah
it's almost like i i sort of equate equate drinking more with heightening the fun.
Exactly.
I'm like, let's get more mimosas.
Just come on.
But then I end up passing out.
Yeah, and it's definitely not more fun.
It's more just like when everyone orders another drink,
I'm like, awesome, that's 30 more minutes.
It's fun to facilitate.
30 more minutes.
Yeah, exactly.
And when you can kind of bring it out as somebody,
you can get them to accept accept their party monster for like an hour.
Yeah.
And then you can tell that they're a little bit happier.
You're like, nice, I brought that out of that person.
Yeah, yeah, it feels good.
I feel like too a lot of it's like, not like you're,
I'm like being a chemist with my own body.
Yeah.
You know, like if I'm a little tired,
I like to have all the little vices around and just tinker.
You know, if I'm a little tired, maybe just a little bit of caffeine, maybe a little weed
if I'm too this.
Right.
Yeah.
Just kind of play around.
Yeah.
You enjoy the process.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Just kind of learning your body.
A tinkerer.
You know what I could use?
I could microdose mushrooms today.
That might put me where I want to be.
I think you're kind of like that with your creative process too.
Like you like to tinker.
Yeah, that's right.
Yeah.
Maybe. Maybe. Maybe it's like
ADD of one. Sometimes
if I'm not doing caffeine, drinking
anything, halfway through the day I'm like
I'm just like, I gotta mix it up.
There's joy in it. Yeah, mix it up.
There's something about like heightening the
excitement.
If I get excited about something, I'm like
I'm gonna go get a quad espresso
and just drive. Because I'm like, I need to just get more and more excited. something, I'm like, I'm going to go get a quad espresso and just drive.
Yeah.
Because I'm like, I need to just get more and more excited.
I think I'm just addicted to excitement.
Oh, I'm an adrenaline junkie for sure.
Oh, yeah.
Not in any physical way, but mental.
Me too.
Emotional for me.
Emotional, yeah.
I'm an emotional adrenaline junkie.
Totally.
All my friends in college were like big drinkers, extreme athletes.
And I always was like, why are we friends it's so
funny i'm so different as i get older i'm like i'm the same it's just not physical right sometimes
i'll ask a girl out he's like out of my league just for like the rush i'm just like do you want
to get coffee tomorrow no response i'm like oh yeah the other day i left my wallet on the car
seat while i went to go inside the gas station, and I left my car unlocked.
And I was like, you idiot, why would you do that?
Just bring your keys, lock the door.
But I was like, that's exciting.
The feeling you got when you go back and you find it.
Yeah, and it's still there.
And I'm kind of looking out the window to make sure no one's getting into my car,
even though I know no one will.
But it just feels exciting.
Yeah.
It's like you're testing your luck.
Totally.
I'll do that, too.
I'll park in a fucking meter and not pay
i'm like well i don't get tickets yeah i'm gonna prove it right right now then you come out no
ticket and you're like that's right gangster sometimes i'll order food to get delivered
when i'm coming from somewhere else and i'm like the food might beat me to my place oh dude
that's a good one to beat it back that should be a be a movie. Yeah. I'm like, oh no.
And then I'm like, wait, I forgot. I gotta stop somewhere to like
grab stamps. Yeah. And I'm like, oh fuck,
dude. But you kind of knew you were gonna do that.
You knew it was stupid. I just gotta add obstacles,
add excitement.
Do you ever do this with like, I have like
my car registration, I still have to pay it.
I've like got it in my car underneath the seat.
Yeah. Which I know is a stupid place to put it,
but I'm also like, I don't know, it's kind of exciting. Like, will I remember? Will the seat. Yeah. Which I know is a stupid place to put it, but I'm also like,
I don't know,
it's kind of exciting.
Like, will I remember?
Will I not?
Yeah.
Paying bills on time?
Not for me.
It's too easy.
Not for me. Yeah.
You got tested.
And it's also hard at the same time.
Like, I'll pay one bill.
Like, I'll have four bills to pay,
and I'll pay one,
and literally after the first one,
I'm like, just defeated.
I'm like, I can't do this.
I got to spread it out over a couple days.
You're just completely drained. Yeah. I thought about having parties. like, just defeat it. I can't do this. I've got to spread it out over a couple days. You're just completely drained.
I thought about having parties.
Have a party. It's a bill-paying party.
Come over on Sunday.
Mimosas, booze, do your taxes.
That's genius.
In a group environment. I've never done it, but I've always wanted to.
Same with reading the news, even.
Let's catch up on the news once a week,
but let's get drunk.
That one can go sideways quick. That's true. Don't do that actually actually don't do that you can learn
about it but you don't get to talk about it with each other yeah right right it's all silent um
you have a good party philosophy like on in so many respects but one of the things i i most uh
the one that got me super excited was the party 5. Oh, yeah, yeah. The Party 5. Well, yeah, the idea there was I had a buddy who had this killer pool party,
Christian from our show, and he was like,
I don't have that many of them, though, because it's kind of a pain to clean up.
And I was like, so the only reason we don't have more parties
is because it's too hard to clean up.
For $120, we could get a house service to come in
and clean this after every party.
If everyone at this party pitched $5, problem solved.
And then we could have so many parties.
So I started doing this thing called the Party 5,
where any party I go to,
I just Venmo the host of the party $5.
And I'm trying to make it a thing,
because that way if you had a party
and you knew that the next day
you'd get $5 from everybody to cover chips toilet paper whatever you'd have more parties yeah yeah so
that's the hope it's like a pay it forward kind of pay it forward yeah yeah yeah because i've done
that too when you have when you're the host of a party there's always random incidentals and you
know if you knew those are going to be covered i feel like you'd have more parties and i just
imagine waking up the next day as the host and just getting a deluge of $5 Venmos
and being like, whoa! I'd feel so
loved and appreciated. Totally.
That dopamine hit, I'd want to chase
it again. Yeah, and I had
friends knowing that I liked to do that. When I had a
party recently, they hid $5
bills around the house. Oh, very funny.
So the next day when I was cleaning up, I was going around
finding money. Oh!
Made it fun. So is it catching on?
No.
No?
But with the help of you guys and this podcast, maybe.
Dude, this is where it's going to take off.
Yeah, Stokers, let's go.
And if you do it, Venmo, and then say Party 5 and the thing.
And that way people know what's going on.
I can say once it starts to catch fire, everyone starts doing it.
And then the people who don't do it, they're going to feel shame.
Feel shame.
So you just got to get to that point.
You just got that tipping point where enough people are doing it to where the guys who
aren't doing it, they're going to get called out.
Yeah, and I think most people would do it if they just thought of it.
Yeah.
Why would you not?
Yeah.
Unless you don't have the money, and then you shouldn't feel pressured either, because
you don't want people not going to parties just because they don't have the five bucks.
Yeah.
And there's other ways to contribute, too.
Yeah. because you don't want people not going to parties just because they don't have the five bucks. And there's other ways to contribute too. Totally.
Yeah.
Like maybe that person brings like wigs.
They have wigs.
They have fun wigs.
That is good for a party. Or boas.
They have fun boas.
Right, right.
You know, like stuff that people can wear.
Yeah.
Yeah, yeah.
Because you're like a costume designer or something.
Partying in a hairpiece is one of the greatest joys of my life.
If you put on a wig, it picks you up. You kind of become
the wig you're wearing. And it gives people
something to talk about with you.
Yeah. They get to role play with you.
Yeah. I think that's really fun.
You ever put on, I put on a pink wig one time
with long hair and someone took some photos of me
and I was like, I looked beautiful.
The face I was making was like
kind of like soft and gentle
but kind of seductive too
yeah and sometimes you put those on you'll think this is crazy i'm not like this and other people
are like i could like they buy it so much yeah maybe i could i don't know yeah i could become
that person it breaks down the walls totally yeah you know you throw that on you at the party i mean
everyone's raging it opens you up yeah yeah yeah my buddy buddy Casey, we had a hairpiece party in college one time.
Is that what you called it?
Yeah.
And then we walked in on him, and he was doing coital engagements with the hairpiece alone.
Oh, nice.
We were so proud.
I didn't really tell that story that well, but if you were there, you would have been
pumped.
I mean, there's a world where it's kind of
it'd be kind of cool
if wigs were more
socially okay
for sure
you know I've had friends
who like they wear
a wild blue wig
and you're like
that looks
like I have a fur coat
long fur coat
yeah
looks rad
yeah
and it kills me
I can't just wear it out
yeah
especially when it's cold
yeah
it'd be a whole thing
and then people you know
have you tried to rock it
yeah once or twice
but that's a whole thing
do you feel like the way people are looking at you and you just don't like it yeah
it's just if you're up for the energy it's great well you're kind of just like i just wanted to
wear it it's cold yeah and same with if you had a blue wig you know i have friends you know they'll
get in a wig like you should just wear that yeah it looks good yeah well it's like i guess i get
self-conscious sometimes because i take propitia to keep my hair or whatever but then you think
all the founding fathers were wearing wigs.
Like none of them were going outside with their regular hairdo.
Yeah.
So like there's always been a level.
And look how good they look, yeah.
Yeah, they look fucking badass, dude.
They inspired people and shit.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Dude, instead of toupees, we should start promoting like blue wigs.
Yeah.
I like blonde wigs though, platinum blonde.
You know what looks good?
Have you ever seen where like people tie like long pieces of fabric to the roots of their hair?
Like the little rubber bands?
Oh, yeah.
And they do a ton of them, so it looks like they have long hair, but it's all fabric.
I've never seen that.
It looks sick.
Where are they doing that at?
I think Burning Man.
Oh, so you're a big Burning Man guy, too.
Yeah, yeah.
We haven't had someone as a representative of Burning Man on.
Well, I just speak for myself.
Can't represent the whole man.
I love that.
Yeah.
You guys have never been?
No.
What's it like?
Well, so take us through your last experience.
It was a good one, right?
Last one was a little tough.
There was some ex-girlfriend drama out there
and things like that.
Oh, so that can even happen at Burning Man?
Well, yeah.
I mean, what festivals have you guys been to?
Coachella.
Coachella, Outside Lanes.
I went to like Stereo Sonic in Australia.
That sounds fire.
It was kind of not actually.
Because brews, I mean, beers are super expensive.
But you're also in Australia and we're like, oh, we can get the necessary things we need here, and we didn't.
We just couldn't find anything.
Oh, I copy.
Yeah.
Well, and I did just get my ticket so I can preach the word of it
and not have to worry about whether it gets overcrowded.
Nice.
He's already got my ticket.
That's always the fear is people are going to get too excited about it.
When do they go on sale?
It's going to be hard to get a ticket.
Do they have a special announcement? Yeah, it's in March or April or something. Yeah. Oh, so you're reluctant to talk about it? No do they go on sale it's gonna be hard to get a ticket do they have like a special announcement yeah it's in like march or april or something yeah
oh so you're like reluctant to talk about no i'm down i'm down i'm kind of kidding but also
no everybody everybody should go protective of it everybody should go i mean i've even thought
like if i really think it's as good and important as it is i should be down to let other people go
my place just experience it but you've described it to me like it's just like the most positive
vibes in the world.
It's like truly an ideal society.
Yeah.
Well, unlike Coachella or like other festivals where that is a music festival, that is what it is.
And then there's camping off to the side, but you're there for the music.
And this is more like there is that, but that's just one of the many things to do.
But I think the dopest thing about it is you go with all your homies, you strap up for the day,
it's like party war. You know, you get
all your glow sticks ready to go and your
backpack, and you're not going to come home for eight hours.
And you're out in the desert, so you've got to pack all
your stuff so you feel kind of badass.
Then you hop on your bikes and cruise out.
And then you just ride around and go, hey, look at that
40-foot tall thing blowing fire.
We should go check that out and climb on it.
Do that for 20 minutes, meet some randos from somewhere else they've got wine crack it drink it then hey look at that other
thing that looks crazy let's go check that out yeah and it's just you feel free and everyone's
in a good mood and and it's the scope of it is just it's massive i mean it's like 80 000 people
and it's a barter system right right? Yeah, but not literal.
Not like, if you want this, give me something.
It's more like the way house parties are in college.
It's like, I throw in this weekend.
I'm assuming it's coming back to me down the road.
Right.
So you go to a bar.
They have bars that are like just overflowing with people.
It's like if you just focus on the front of you, you feel like you're at a normal bar.
But you look up, and there's no roof, and it's you look up and there's no roof and it's the stars and there's no money.
Everyone's just pouring drinks.
And they did fundraisers throughout the year, however they got the money.
But you don't touch your wallet.
And so because it's a week, you just lose yourself to the, like time becomes like who cares.
And you don't spend money.
And those are the two things that kind of lock you up the most in real life.
So by the third day, you're like, I haven't touched my wallet.
I haven't looked at a watch.
It's like you just feel totally free.
No phones, right?
Yeah.
More and more people are bringing their phones because they want the camera.
Right.
And there's a little reception.
Not really, but enough that that's my beef is that people are taking way too many pictures.
And it's like you're supposed to be doing whatever you want to do,
and if you want to be naked, you're supposed to be naked.
And people are like bringing their cameras out.
I find myself being caught in people's –
I was at the – there's a temple out there
where you go mourn people you've lost throughout the year.
And I'm out there like, yeah, my dad had passed away,
so I wrote like a letter to my dad, and you post it up,
and it's this massive temple.
It's beautiful, and they have. People are out there all week
and anytime there's 100 people
going through whatever they're going through and writing
letters and putting them up. When you walk
in, it's just huge walls and it's
all these pictures of people that have been
lost. It was really emotionally overwhelming.
I was going through
that cathartic thing and I'm sitting out front
and this girl just rides her bike by
with her phone out, just kind of filming me while I'm sitting on the and this girl just rides her bike by with her phone out just kind of like
filming me while I'm sitting on the ground
crying. I'm just like what are you doing?
And it's like that kind of
the way people are
dissociated with their phones in normal life
like I am seeing that out there where instead of being
in the moment they're like filming you like you're part of the
something to look at. Right.
And that kind of bothers me. That's too bad.
Do you feel it getting kind of Coachella-fied? Last year was Right. And that kind of bothers me. That's too bad. Do you feel like getting
kind of Coachella-fied?
Last year was the only time
I kind of felt that a little bit.
Yeah.
Mainly just for being a player.
Also, I don't know if I'm,
what's going on,
but I'm not digging the music out there.
Hmm.
Like, I was a dubstep guy, I guess,
or I don't know,
but I've been like,
am I just getting old or what?
It's just kind of that, kind of like house music where you don't really dance.
You just kind of.
It's like the deep house, like one beat.
Kind of, yeah.
It's kind of like this and people kind of walk around and just kind of, it's like no
one's really cutting loose.
I like to grind.
Me too.
I want to get down.
Yeah.
So like when it's just the up and down, like the verticality music.
Yeah.
Yeah.
That's not for me.
I need like X, Y axis on the hips.
Exactly. Yeah. And I need to like, there's got to be a little swing to it. Yeah. verticality music yeah yeah that's not for me i need like xy axis on the hips exactly yeah and i
need to like there's got a little little swing to it yeah a gyration component yeah it's kind of
missing it's missing yeah i kind of like that deep house people love it because like i like when it's
like that same beat kind of i go like the yuma tent and coachella okay the same beat and you can
move to it but you can get creative within that one move okay that's
sort of what i like right it's like you can you know do a little gyration it's just well there's
some really feel it in your body and white belt moves with black belt skill yeah that's what i'm
talking about okay i like that but also some some of that there's intangibles to house where like
sometimes it's just it's too there's nothing you can even do and other ones
have suggestive little things where you find yourself thinking of interesting stuff right yeah
yeah you don't feel like you can imbue your personality into the move not as much but
dubstep what i always liked about it was it's like a slow enough tempo that you can go to that
you can go like double time and now you're or you can go faster than that. You've got a lot of options tempo-wise. Yeah.
But I was in Europe a couple years ago,
and this guy was like at this rave thing.
He was like, dubstep's dead, bro.
It's techno.
All around the world, it's techno, bro.
Dubstep's dead.
Let it go.
Why did he say that? I don't know, because I was kind of complaining about the music in this place.
His point was like, faster techno, you're supposed to just go
close your eyes and like meditatively just get lost in it.
Right.
Whereas I wanted to dance and dance with my friends and stuff.
Yeah.
Right.
I think for him, he's like, that's not what it's for.
What did you say to him when he said that to you?
I just was like, you're wrong.
Nice.
Dude, way to stand your ground.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Also, I was drunk and on Molly or something.
I was having a good time.
Have you made friends at Burning Man that you're still friends with?
Some of my best friends, yeah.
You met there?
Yeah.
My buddy Connell met my first year out there,
and we've been friends ever since.
That was like 13 years ago.
Wow.
And yeah, Tim and Jamelia, a lot of friends.
How did you and Connell first meet?
He was part of some camp that like, I think it was the monster.com.
This is a rumor because you can't advertise your stuff out there.
But one of the big camps was I think the guy who owns monster.com.
And they had flown out to help build that camp.
A lot of people go help build a camp and then get free lodging as part of it.
But I guess it was run just militantly
and they were just like, screw this.
One of our friends met them out one night,
he and his buddy Tez,
and then we just hit it off.
And they're like, dude,
can we just move our shit over to your camp
and ditch these guys?
And we're like, yeah, come on over.
So midway through the week,
they just brought all their stuff and camped with us.
Nice.
But you're just meeting people with all your walls down.
I always say it's like at a wedding when everyone's just in cloud nine.
My favorite.
All the family relatives you never even talk to.
You're all dancing together.
It's that kind of vibe, but just for a long enough time that you can really sink into it.
Nice.
And it's hard enough that you have to, you know, there's dust storms and you've got to set all your shit up.
And it kind of gives you that sense of accomplishment, like when you're backpacking or something, mixed in with the partying,
which I think is a nice combo.
Yeah.
Do you set up an elaborate tent?
No.
My weakness is my personal lodging situation.
My buddies have nice—they're good at building stuff,
so we set up this huge parachute canopy thing,
and then I just have my little shit tent underneath it.
My second year,
I thought we were all going to camp together under the stars.
You know,
we get there and everybody brought their own tent.
So it's only me not in a tent.
And then like the,
the,
the sides of our little public structure had somehow blown in the wind.
So all my stuff had gotten moved to just on the other side of this little
tent wall.
So for all week I was like, dude, all my shit's gone.
I think I got stolen.
Like my clothes, my everything.
And then the last day I was like, Oh, it's on the other side of the tarp.
But it's rough weather too, right?
Yeah.
I mean, it's, it's, it's usually pretty sunny and pretty nice,
but you'll get these, it's unpredictable.
I mean, the sandstorms can be vicious and they can be days.
But it's kind of cool to see people rally
like last year
like Dust Devil
popped up in our thing
and just ripped
our parachute down
and the wind
was picking up
and all these poles
were teetering
in kind of a dangerous way
and all the neighbors
ran over
helped us like set it up
in the middle of a dust storm
and sort of like
20 minutes
we're just like
working arm in arm
and setting it up
and when it was done
this guy ran across the street
came back with tequila
poured everyone a shot
and we can't even see each other
in the dust
and we're all just like
drinking together
that's awesome
have you danced to the song
Sandstorm
during a sandstorm
I have not
fuck
dude
is that
is that
a common song
that's a good
no
I've never heard that out there.
Damn.
Yeah, because that's like a...
It feels like it was made at Burning Man.
I was going to ask.
I was like, did that song get written at Burning Man?
Yeah.
I mean...
Duh, rude.
That's a good question.
It feels like it should happen.
I went to London in high school.
But you probably don't want to force it.
No, I think people would be into that.
Okay, cool, cool.
Yeah, yeah.
I mean, if you come and you did that, I think that'd be fresh.
Dude, I'm like nervous to come for some reason. don't know why i guess i was nervous to go to
coachella too and then once i did i was like oh i totally get it and i guess i've built it up in my
head it's almost like coachella yeah yeah i mean the thing that's tough about it is a week and you
get tired and it's hot and so to me i just get really emotional as the week goes on but it's
good it's it's good. It's just...
Well, it's probably good to get those emotions out too.
I think so.
Although sometimes you're like when any song can make you cry or like every friend, you're
like, hey man, I'm sorry I don't call you as much as I should, dude.
Like sometimes it's right on and other times you're like, dude, you call me all the time.
Right, right, right.
Yeah.
It's actually firing me up because I love the desert so much.
Yeah. But I just never... Honestly, Burning up cause I love the desert so much. Yeah.
But I just never,
I honestly,
Burning Man has always just been kind of a mystery to me.
Like I'd see photos,
like I,
my buddy mayor would always go and I'm just like,
what is going on?
Like I had no idea.
The outfits are a little intimidating at times.
Yeah.
And I was like,
I was like,
I just don't know if I can get up to that level.
Match that vibe.
But the way you're talking about it,
man,
it sounds amazing.
Well,
I'm like,
to me,
like those weekend festivals,
because it's only weekend,
people rage.
Yeah.
And then you have to get on that level.
Right.
Whereas this,
it's like,
if you're tired,
there's a hammock camp.
Just go sleep all day in a hammock.
People know it's a marathon,
so they'll.
Yeah.
And there's tons of stuff to do
that is low energy.
You can take free yoga classes all day.
Go meditate,
do it.
That's lovely.
Yeah.
That sounds great.
But it's like backpacking for me.
I know it's probably easy, but I don't have the stuff.
So I don't even think about ever doing it.
Yeah.
It just feels like there's a little barrier to entry.
Dude, so you're in a hilarious sketch group, the Dress Up Gang.
Thanks, man.
You do brilliant comedy.
You guys are so, so funny.
And then you recently did something very punk rock.
Do you want to explain it?
Yeah, I do.
I'm stoked on this.
We made a, well, we made a show, we made a web series, maybe like five years ago.
Ten episodes over like a couple years.
Just kind of one at a time, just kind of finding this little world we were building out.
Then we sold it as a show to TBS,
which was thrilling.
Couldn't have been more excited.
We made a full season of this show, 10 episodes.
And then at the 11th hour, they were just like,
hey, you know what?
Right as we were finishing,
yeah, we thought we were going to do late night comedy stuff.
We're kind of changing our mind,
so we're just not going to air it.
And then it was just like that, done.
And we had this whole season. We still had a month to edit actually which is kind of brutal um but yeah so we just had it and
it was like two and a half years ago and so you kind of think all right well maybe they'll sell
somewhere else and then nobody bought it and i don't know what's going on with it so we we
submitted it to sundance without telling them last year and then we got in so then we asked
for permission once we did that and and that felt kind of cool.
But then nothing came of that.
So then a couple weeks ago, we were just like, or last week, we were just like, let's just post it.
So we just posted the show, which I guess we don't have permission to do.
I didn't think anybody would care, but we were wrong.
But it felt good.
And Vulture wrote a nice article about us.
We got a little moment in the sun
just to kind of have it be seen by somebody.
Right, yeah.
It's so funny.
Thanks, man.
Yeah, it's so great.
Yeah.
But we had to take it down,
so I don't know what the deal is now.
How did you come up with, like,
because it's, I don't know,
I'll describe it incorrectly,
but it's, like, very slow, the pace of it.
It's very much about the idiosyncrasies of social dynamics
or interpersonal dynamics between friends and stuff.
How did you guys cultivate that as the point of view?
Part of the pacing is we used to show them at live shows all the time.
To me, actually, if you show's it's the timing is for live audiences
oh interesting when people say it's slow it's like it's more like set up set up punch right
because if you watch like a 30 rock or something or let's say you know whatever any that's like
the best example of it yeah exactly i mean but there's sometimes there's most shows on tv it's
faster pace but how often do you really laugh out loud?
Right.
How often do you really, and if you showed it live,
it wouldn't really play because there's no...
It's like you recognize the jokes, but you're like,
oh, that's amusing, but you don't...
It keeps you entertained, but you're not belly laughing.
Yeah, you're not actually feeling it, I think.
Well, it's like Burning Man.
You need those extra days to sink into the feeling right that's right yeah so i think taking your
time with this that way i mean yeah so it's paced a little different i think also the performances
are a little more subdued we're not like you know yeah that's true characters i think that's part of
why it feels that way because if you do like if you charted the laughs per minute it's probably
not too different from other shows but it's's just a little mellower feel.
But I think you have to do that to some degree to get people invested.
You have to connect to the main character's issues in the first scene.
Otherwise, by the time you get to the end, you're not going to care.
So there's some balance to be struck there with shows.
You and Donnie are the two primary characters.
Yeah.
And you're kind of like the big brother, and he's kind of like the younger brother a little bit.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I mean, I think the weird conceit of the show is that I kind of act like his dad.
Right.
Which, I mean, the whole web series was born out of just one sketch we did where to make it work,
I kind of had to get him in trouble for something.
Right.
And then we were like, well, that's kind of funny and kind of weird.
So we kind of exaggerated it to where I'm just this total loser on his couch yet i kind of run the house and just
that contrast and the donnie's clearly capable smart guy but yet totally defers to me in every
regard right and so yeah that that was born out of this first sketch and for that we needed it to
be like leave it to beaver style kind of vibe. So it wasn't super intentional.
You know, it just kind of grew out of that.
Yeah.
Do you like writing more for your character or for Donnie's?
That's a good question.
Mine.
Maybe in the same way that Curb allows Larry David to be like kind of a jerk.
Yeah.
Mine allows me to be really kind of grumpy and first thought, I think, which I like.
It's really cathartic.
I don't know.
That's nice. I think which I like it's really cathartic I don't know is it a character that you sort of
when you were
funny with your friends or growing up
it's sort of like you dive into this kind of character
a little bit or is it something you sort of
always felt you had in you
or is it something you sort of discovered through this sketch
I think through the sketch I think like
I think I grew into it
through that and I kind of exaggerated one part of myself.
And the more I did it to my dad, like the mannerisms, a lot of the ways he is, is like totally my dad.
Right.
So I think there was maybe a cathartic aspect to that too.
Which like in your friend group, what was like your role?
That's a good question.
Like in high school?
Yeah.
Yeah. Maybe the, I don't't know all my friends are really funny i was about to say all my friend like i was
definitely one of the funny ones but everyone has like their own way of being funny yeah maybe a
connector like i'm into like making sure we're all kicking it what are we up to that kind of thing
but in high school i was i kind of would bounce around everyone else's crew you know like everybody had little group, and I would just see what was going on that weekend and go to that.
More than just hanging out with my little group.
Right, you wanted to mix it up.
Mix it up, yeah.
I always found that was more fun.
I never wanted to isolate myself with one crew.
No.
It's always fun to like, yeah, I'm hanging out with the hockey kids right now.
Right.
We're going to go play lacrosse, and I'm going to watch them truck some kids.
Yeah. I think they say biodiversity, it's good for evolution. I'm hanging out with the hockey kids right now. Right. We're going to go play lacrosse and I'm going to watch them truck some kids.
I think they say like biodiversity, it's good for evolution.
Like, you know, the more you mix with other different groups,
the more strong traits get passed on. There's like a certain sense of pride you get from being like,
I'm not beholden to one squad.
Yeah.
I can survive without my squad.
Yeah.
Although sometimes when there's like certain parties and you're like,
I didn't get invited to that one.
Yeah.
Probably because I'm not in any squad. I at like a i had like a i did a
show at the virgil on friday and i was trying to like hang out afterwards and it was like it was
too hip for me i was like i got to get out of here and go hang out with like the bros i'm comfortable
yeah yeah yeah through no fault of the people i was kicking it with they were all wonderful but
it was just like a like a timing and like a rhythm thing and I was like
trying to like get in there
and then I was like,
you know what?
It's just not going to work.
Yeah,
I know that.
Yeah.
Sometimes it takes a lot of energy
and you got to be confident
in your own cadence
and be like,
yeah,
I'm going to do this level of energy
and not let it bend
to whatever's going on,
which can be really hard to do.
That's what I should have done
is just stuck to what I know
and been like,
you know what?
It's going to work.
It's fine.
Yeah,
but it can be tough. It tough yeah yeah what do you think
dude i fucking agree nice dude sick me too you seen anything good lately i saw invisible man
yesterday what do you think that's getting like good reviews it's not good i mean this
it's did you see it no no but i'm surprised but it's kind of like a
surprise hit it seems yeah yeah i wonder if people are just kind of i mean it's there's a couple good
scares there's one pretty epic scare i thought yeah i was like all right that was almost worth
the price yeah but it's it's it's like the fault with all a lot of action movies and horror movies
it's the moments between the scares or the action sequences aren't that fun to me
or interesting.
I think this was trying to be a little smarter
than it was.
It's almost poignant, but not really at all, I think.
It shouldn't have tried to make a point or anything.
Well, yeah, I just don't think it did a good job of it.
The way Get Out was great commentary.
This, I think, almost was. And if you know, commentary. This I think almost was
and if you want to add
a lot of your own thoughts
to it,
it could be.
Yeah.
But I didn't find it to be.
A lot of plot holes too.
I mean,
I wish you guys had seen it.
It'd be fun.
I mean,
it's just like
a lot of things
where I'm like,
there's just no way.
Was she good?
She's good.
She's good.
Yeah.
But her character,
they don't,
I just,
it's not that well written,
I think.
Was the invisible guy good? You don't I just it's not that well written I think was the invisible guy good
you don't ever really
get to know him
you don't really see him
and
obviously
and
he's like
super
I mean they give him
like freakish abilities
like
yeah
and it's like
well he's just a dude
with a suit
he's just invisible
he's just invisible
oh so he's not dead
he's just
is that a giveaway
oh interesting I thought it was kind of like Hollow Man where he figured out how to become invisible He's just invisible. He's just invisible. Oh, so he's not dead. He's just, is that a giveaway?
Oh, interesting.
I thought it was kind of like Hollow Man where he figured out how to become invisible. I think that's what we're finding out.
But I mean, look, I got to tell you.
What about Hollow Man where he's only invisible for like an hour and then he's like, you know
what I'm going to do?
Sexually assault a lady.
Didn't see that.
I forgot about that part.
It's a dark turn.
Yeah.
And you're like, why?
Well, imagine your power.
I didn't see the movie, but imagine your power is invisible.
Like, what are you really able to do?
I don't like it.
Be a perv or sneak into places?
We were talking to Dan and Dan about it.
Become a huge perv.
And the big one that This American Life did was, what would you rather have, flight or invisibility?
Is that even a question?
Right, flight all day.
Duh.
Dan and Dan went with invisibility.
What?
And I forget what the, what there's, it's certain like extroverts like flight and introverts
like invisibility or something like that.
Oh.
I forget what the dividing line was.
I'll look it up.
But yeah, for me, I'm like, of course flight.
Right.
And everyone's like, no, invisibility.
You'd know what everybody was thinking.
You'd have like a tactical advantage with like different things.
I'm like.
Yeah.
It sounds not ethical.
Yeah.
It's like, how about I just fly?
Yeah.
It sounds kind of brutal.
You don't want to know what everyone's thinking.
No. And also you'd be hearing that and that's not ethical yeah i would i would fly it'd be so sick you could steal out of everyone's wallet can you imagine dude yeah
that's not good i would fly all the time dude that's all i would do i'd be flying around this
room right now and you know with a mic yeah you'd be hovering off your seat like an inch
and it's like if i was invisible like, I could find out what everybody thinks about me,
but if I could fly, I'd already know what everybody thinks about me.
They'd think I'm amazing.
Yeah, let me guess.
I guess 70% of people chose flight,
28% chose invisibility,
so 2%, I guess, abstain, which is interesting.
More men than women picked flight.
Yeah, did not play that game.
Yeah, they don't want any part of that.
I like the way you said you watch movies, too.
Do you want to explain that kind of...
When you go to the theater?
Oh, just like to live in it?
Yeah, like you smoke weed.
Like smoke a little weed, sit in like second row, sit right in the middle, and just get lost.
I got to be in it.
Otherwise, it's too easy for me to check out.
I've been trying to do that ever since you told us about that.
Just sit in the movie
and just like kind of,
because I'm so prone,
I'm so ADD that I'm like,
I'm going to go take a piss.
Right, right.
So I'm that way too,
but that's why you got to get boxed in
by the people
so you can't even leave
if you want to.
Right.
That's why I see slow movies
in the theater.
Right.
Because you like saw Roma.
You do need to see Roma.
Roma.
Exactly.
You have to see that in the theater.
You do.
If I saw that at home,
I'd be like, this is the most boring movie I've seen.
In the theater, I'm like, best picture.
Yeah, exactly.
No one's going to compete with Zion Williams.
Yeah, you're changing in five seconds.
Yeah.
Did you see Port Latrude of A Lady on Fire?
No, but I heard that's great.
It's a good slow movie for the theater.
Okay.
Yeah.
Great.
And nice romance, too.
It's pretty.
Oh, I love that.
I heard that's the movie of the year.
Does that sound about right?
For this year? Like, it's going to be year like it's gonna be okay i could see it i i could see that happening i don't know if it's it's not exactly my taste i see but i was i loved i really liked
it yeah but it's not like i would be like yeah i'm gonna fucking watch that it's so there's some
movies like you know where people kind of like i haven't seen uncut gems yet but it's one of these where i wasn't crazy about it okay people go dude it's great um real stressful yeah real they kind
of give you one of those things where i'm like well now i'm never gonna go see it like when am
i gonna want to experience that yeah portrait of a lady for people be like dude it's great it's it's
it's a little long a little slow but uh it's good go yeah my dad's review of uncut gems was like
thank fucking god that's over yeah and then and you know it's funny i kept telling myself i thought
it was pretty good and then finally one of my friends on a group chat my friend ross was like
saw uncut gems it sucks and like him saying that it allowed you it allowed me to believe that yeah
i was living in like uh i was uh i was living in a cell of consensus yeah that's true i
have a lot of friends who love that i would have a hard time seeing i didn't if i didn't right
thing this is pretentious but with the uh sitting up close in the theater that's how you're supposed
to like rothko says that's how you're supposed to look at his paintings like you're supposed to get
super close and be immersed in it so all the color just overwhelms you it makes sense i mean even for
this movie yesterday i sat in the side wing up close
because my friends wanted to,
and I just thought, this sucks.
It's like the angle's all weird,
the screen's not right,
and then I thought, if I don't like this,
it's kind of on me for sitting over here.
I sit in the very back
because I don't like anyone behind me,
and I write notes about the movie to myself
as I watch it,
and I like having a mostly empty theater.
That's about the exact opposite experience.
Yeah.
Do you ever look back on the notes?
Yeah, all the time.
Oh, you do?
Yeah.
My favorite one's First Man really got me writing some notes.
If Beale Street Could Talk really got me writing some notes.
What kind of notes do you write?
If Beale Street Could Talk, I realize Barry Jenkins is really into first love and like not the carnal part of it but the way like it opens you up
emotionally and all that and he's like really obsessed with that kind of like interaction and
so I was just writing about that and then with First Man it was all just about like how having
that how he has to act all drilled up and cold because that's what allows him to feel like he
has control over this uncontrollable behavior.
Yeah.
Just like different stuff.
So kind of more meditative thoughts inspired by the movie.
Yeah.
Critiques of the movie.
Like basically it's like I read the screenplay and I walk up to the screen
and I'm like,
I think these are your 10 themes.
Yeah.
Like you're a good student.
And I'm like,
thank you.
That's great.
I,
sometimes when I watch movies at home,
I do that.
I'll like,
I watched a, a like inherent vice like that where where I put it on when I'm by myself, close the door
to my room, and I'll watch like 30 minutes, pause it, leave, go for a walk, think about
it, come back, just kind of dive in throughout the course of a day.
I just kind of live the movie.
And I kind of like doing that too.
That's the best movies change the way your brain, or a good book like you literally feel your brain change and like a really good movie
you'll talk like the characters in it for like a couple hours afterwards and movies like first i
didn't see first man but like uh interstellar i'm sure first man does this even at just maybe just
space movies but where they really inspire you like yeah mankind inspires you yeah those movies
jack me up and i like to milk the experience
like just every 30 minutes pause and go yes i'm gonna go do something sick and email my grandma
or something you just got me jacked yeah i'm similar in a sense that i if i see a character
or something that where i'm inspired by the way they approach life i'll write notes about that
even in like a documentary like i was watching mcmillions and there's this fbi agent and he had such like a childlike sensibility to get in the first episode
yeah doug harris have you watched it i we put it on but i was hanging out the front and we got to
talk and then kind of missed it right but yeah i like that guy but uh i'm always inspired by people
who seem to approach life where they they're just having fun all the time.
They're able to sort of transcend those worries.
So that's what kind of gets me going.
Yeah, that's interesting.
I wonder if people like that, you know, stuff when a camera's on them, like they're giving you that.
Right, yeah.
Because I am always curious about that.
I feel like I kind of oscillate
between super silly thinking comedically
and then other times I'm, like, super serious.
Not externally, maybe, but in my head I'm, like,
trying to figure something out that I read
or just think about something.
Yeah.
And I'll see people super carefree
that don't worry about stuff, and I'm like,
are they just not thinking about what I'm thinking?
Or are they just having a better attitude about everything? Yeah, don't know i think that's what confuses me because i'm so
i think for my family i'm so prone to worry although people say i have like a calm disposition
but my mind's always racing right he's like checking email and like i'm like what's what
do i do next you know what kind of thing yeah that so it's like i'm like i'm like how do you
how do you have that because i used to like i told my dad in college one time i'm like i have
anxiety and but i was like but it's good because i get things done. You know what I mean?
But I'm always kind of trying to find the balance of how do you sort of approach life to where you're... I think it's just where you're having fun.
It's like both things, but primarily having fun.
Just learning stuff.
I don't know.
You know what I'm saying?
Yeah, no, totally.
Actually, that was a good experience on the project we were working on where I would,
I noticed that when I'm writing something that is something I'm just writing by
myself,
there's like this existential weight to it.
You know,
when I sit down and write,
I'm like,
all right,
if I don't think of anything good,
either the idea sucks or I suck or there's some kind of magnitude to it.
Yeah.
And then writing for this thing where it's like,
not my baby. I'm just there to help and try to have good ideas it was like it was free i was like well
i'll just do my best yeah and then i was like why can't i just approach my own stuff like that and
then why can't i even just approach everything like that yeah like when i learn something i'm
always reading it with like a serious face or i'm yeah trying to understand it And I'm like, why can't I just be excited to learn things?
Like I got an uncle who's always like, yeah, I've read this book
and did you know this and this and that?
And I'm like, dude, you have fun learning.
I don't know if I like, but it's just a mental state.
No, totally.
All information I take and I'm like, how can I use this information now
to make myself a more productive this or a more productive that?
It's like, well, what if you're just enjoying the process of it?
And maybe there's also a difference.
People talk about the difference between creative thinking.
John Cleese had this good lecture on it.
I forget what he called it.
But it's like when you pay your bills, you run errands,
you have this kind of focused, task-oriented thinking.
And when you need to be creative, you need to think outside the box and open.
So being really careful with yourself throughout the day to not be asking both
of yourself at once.
Right.
Because that's just not going to happen.
Yeah.
So I've been trying to get better too about like,
this is brainstorming time.
This is editing time.
Or this is time to run errands or this is time to like daydream about my
people I care about in my life.
Yeah.
And be a little more
careful about how you what you're asking yourself to do that's smart to sort of designate those
times because a lot of times i'll get uh i get stuck in daydreaming a lot i'll be in bed just
kind of like thinking and jt told me about like john mulaney talks about how that's actually
really important to have yeah so i'm kind of like of like, I used to be like, oh man, I wasted like three hours just laying in bed daydreaming.
But now I'm kind of like, oh, maybe that was a good thing that I kind of let loose like that.
And sometimes you think of your most interesting ideas that way.
And then the way like when you're a kid and you just would work.
Yeah.
You work on something all day and you never would think of it as work.
You just do it.
Yeah.
Sometimes when you daydream, it's nice because you'll arrive at an interesting idea or thought or something and
be like oh wait that's cool i didn't even notice the work it took to get here i just kind of ended
up here yeah you know a lot of uh walter murch that the great editor talked about when he was
writing stuff he would lay down like he's taking a nap in the middle of the day on his couch and
just kind of close his eyes and let himself go half there and try to write from that point of view yeah and
i've tried to do that if i can't sleep i'll try to think of whatever it is i've been writing about
yeah and let myself just try to think those thoughts as i go to bed as i'm dreaming and
then it like checks the box for me that's like okay well i'm being productive i'm thinking about
the thing i'm thinking of yeah and then you then you kind of think it's some cool shit.
Yeah.
I have this thing.
I've noticed lately in people where they're excited to tell you all about their day.
And I've never had that.
Like I've always been like whenever people are like, what'd you do?
I'll be like, yeah, whatever.
Because I always like, it was like two things.
I was like, I don't want to hear about my day.
Like, voice is cracked.
Like, oh, that's selfish. I don't want to tell them all about my day. And there was another thing of two, like was like two things. I was like, I don't want to hear about my day. Like, voice just cracked. Like,
like,
oh,
that's selfish.
I don't want to tell them all about my day.
And there was another thing of two,
like,
I'm too cool to tell you about my day.
You know what I mean? Like,
yeah,
I'm not going to be excited unless it was like,
even if something cool happened,
I'm like,
you'll find out from someone else.
You know,
I thought that is cool.
But it can be cool to tell someone about your day too.
Yeah.
But I want to be more like that like
okay so here's what happened i got in the car and i fucking went to the gym and just ran and like
i'm trying to do that a little bit more because i'm like it's like fun like people want to i don't
know yeah it was hey i have the best compliment i ever got remember when i was like in college
somebody was like what'd you do today and i told him they're like oh like i don't know that's just kind of i just always assumed you did cool shit
yeah that was just kind of normal yeah i was like yeah well no but that's cool yeah yeah yeah
but yeah i mean there's also like i'm so curious to know like whoever the most productive person
is or the most interesting person or like a millennium someone like that who has all these
projects going minute to minute,
how productive are people actually being throughout the day?
I think about that all the time.
Yeah.
Like,
or like in the afternoon for me,
my brain is done and I'm like,
not done,
but you know,
like from three to five,
I'm just kind of not there.
And I'm like,
is everybody experiencing that?
Or is it just me?
Are we all kind of pretending we're on point right now?
Yeah. You know, like where's everyone at? just what's the experience of being you like in this
moment yeah i feel like it's like everyone has their ideal version of themselves but there's
probably a good amount of differentiation between like i feel like like how often are you in your
sweet spot throughout the day oh whatever is prime time jt whatever that is to you like we're like fire in i'm sharp i'm
whatever charming i would say you feel that way when you wake up no i no definitely not i mean i'm
i got these sleep meds i take so it takes me an hour or two just to shake off the cobwebs uh
about five o'clock every day i was saying that today five o'clock every day that's when you
yeah i witness it firsthand yeah interesting like when when the sun starts to go down a little bit.
Yeah.
And like,
I think also it's like me,
I noticed everybody else is like dipping a little bit.
I go,
now's my moment.
I'm like,
I'm like,
everyone's dipping.
I can surge right now.
Yeah.
Well,
they say to the creativity,
like,
uh,
late at night time is,
is good for it.
It's really good for me too.
And for me,
like,
yeah,
during the day when I'm,
I know the world's humming, it's hard to want to think about something silly.
Yeah.
To me, because I feel like it's a waste of time.
I know it's not, but it feels like I should be doing something else.
Or there's stuff to do, places to be.
Exactly. When it's, like, 1130 at night, it's like there's nowhere to be.
Yeah.
Right now, it's just pure choice for me.
I guess it's the equivalent of going to a cabin to write, to be by yourself.
But you just wait until everyone goes to bed, and then you're like, well, all right.
Yeah, exactly.
Same thing.
I saw it happen with you today because he had like hood up for most of the day and then he just sort of lowered it.
Isn't it funny when your clothes or your clothes actually do mean something?
Yeah.
Yeah.
Like for a hood does, when it's up, it's saying something.
Yeah.
It says a lot.
Yeah.
Yeah.
It's funny when you pick out your wardrobe in the morning and then you look at you're like why am i wearing all black and it's
like yeah because you're in a bad mood right right do you think yeah because i notice i kind of wear
the same stuff but like dave you know that we worked with david he he wears like such different
clothes day to day right right that i was always so curious about i asked him i said do you dress
based on how you feel every day or do you just put on? He goes, I dress for how I want to feel.
Oh, wow.
So you kind of like, you know.
Interesting. And he's in a very good mood almost every day.
Almost.
Exactly.
Yeah.
Exactly.
But you know, you wear like bright yellow or something, you know, you're going to get
a couple comments.
I got a pair of white jeans.
I know I'm going to get a couple of somethings.
So I want to be, I need to be up for it.
But I think his attitude is like, just put it on and you'll be up for it.
I have very specific up for it. But I think his attitude is like, just put it on and you'll be up for it. I have very specific sort of things.
Like, I need a shirt to be, like, just oversized enough.
Like, this is perfect.
This is why they get the XL J.Crew Essential Tees.
Okay.
Because they shrink just the right amount.
I was going to ask, how do you factor in the shrinking?
It's part of it?
Like, it's hard because, you know, I'll go to other places and I'll get, like, a t-shirt
and then it'll shrink.
I'm like, I can't wear this anymore.
And then I have to have the no-show socks and Vans.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
It means a lot to me. Someone came up to me.
We had a meeting and I ran into someone from the meeting later.
And they're like, dude, Chad is just the ideal Californian.
He's got the shoes, no socks. And I Californian dude he's got the shoes no socks
and I was like
he's got low cut socks
you can't see them
I was like
yeah yeah
that's true
because people
I used to think
people weren't wearing socks
and then it's like
no your shoes will stink
you can't do that
yeah yeah
it's those little socks
but it worked
yeah
it works
yeah
and it's getting
people
that makes people feel good too
yeah
it's like a relaxing
you're putting out a relaxing vibe
how's my vibe?
it's pretty good
bro dude
I had to take it in
you're the everyman dude
you got jeans and a t-shirt
that's what I'm going for
Joe Schmo American
yeah I want you to be like he just got off his job he's painting houses jeans and a t-shirt. That's what I'm going for. Joe Schmo American.
Yeah.
I want you to be like, he just got off his job. He's painting houses. Yeah.
You could have been painting houses.
You could be like a doctor in his off hours.
Who knows? Oh, nice, dude. Yeah.
I like that. And I got the ethnic ambiguity, too.
So it's like, could be from
anywhere in the Middle East. Totally. From any decade.
Could be out of the 80s right now. Yeah.
I can see that. Thank you.
Thank you.
Should we do some questions?
Let's do it.
Oh, yeah.
First, so you went to UCSB.
That's right.
IV, the home of party.
Yeah.
Was it, did you have expectations going in
and did it exceed those expectations?
No.
You know, I didn't go there for party
and I went there because when I drove around the campus,
I drove around UC San Diego, and I told my dad,
I'm like, we don't need to get out of the car.
I didn't like it.
There's no trees.
Was you telling me that they built the campus to repress?
Strider probably told you that because he went there.
Okay, that's right.
Yeah.
Yeah.
They built it in some way to repress.
They didn't want kids being able to congregate
because protests were happening.
Maybe intuitively, it just felt like this place sucks.
Yeah.
Right.
But in UC Santa Barbara, I just drove around eucalyptus trees.
Loved the smell.
I was like, I'm going here.
Didn't even do any research.
That's cool.
Strider was bumming hard.
We went down there for like a weekend trip and on the way back up, he's like, why the
fuck did I go there, dude?
Yeah. I mean, I had friends that liked it but like when you when you're in santa barbara to the no disrespect to any ucsd no no no i mean a little
bit but it's probably a better school i heard right yeah um but what does that even mean and
the when you live off campus at santa barbara it's all college kids so i'd go visit friends
in san diego and be like,
this sucks. Like your neighbors are adults with kids. Like you can't party. Um, so Santa Barbara was whatever I thought college was going to be times 20. Right. It's just like, did you guys
ever party there? Yeah. Yeah. It's the best. I remember I went to party there. I actually,
I went there in high school at first you party there in high school yeah it was
like my senior years maybe actually my summer of my junior year and i was like this is i didn't get
in uh-huh i really wanted to go you see like spite party yes party of schools that didn't
want you there you're like all right well this is before i didn't get it i went there and i was like
this is the greatest place i've ever been yeah like i i would i didn't get it i went there and i was like this is the greatest
place i've ever been yeah like i i would i'll go here and i'll live here for the rest of my life
but i didn't get in but it's probably for the best because i you know i may party too much but
who knows yeah i had mixed feelings i mean i had a great time i had a blast but i didn't get shit
out of school yeah which is on me i mean i't try. But I was playing music and doing all these other things that I was really excited about.
And I just didn't.
Did you pick up cultural stuff there?
Did your art taste develop?
No.
I just got into making hip-hop beats.
That's cool.
You know?
I mean, I loved it.
I lived and breathed it.
And I was into it.
So I got a lot out of it in that regard.
And I loved it. I've lived and breathed it, and I was into it. So I got a lot out of it in that regard. And I finished early, just because I stopped caring about my grades,
so I just took hella classes at once.
You're pretty good at slam poetry, right?
Well.
Could you do some?
On here?
Yeah.
Yeah, I could probably do some.
I mean, the joke is that I'm not good at it.
Well, part of the joke is also that you're pretty good at it.
Okay, yeah, sometimes. All right, give me joke is also that you're pretty good at it. Okay.
Yeah.
Sometimes.
All right.
Give me a topic.
I'll try.
Recycling.
Recycling.
How come when you pick something up, your impulses make it trash, turn it to ash?
I give it like cash.
Recycle it.
But how come when you sit at a table, you don't even think about the side of it?
How come you don't touch the underside of it? The table has two sides, doesn't it? Isn't rust what you get when water
turns to metal? But how come when you talk to the lettuce in your garden, it doesn't metal with the
other vegetables? How come it settles, okay, when the rain comes down. Okay. And kisses the soil. How come it doesn't boil when it's hot? How come you forgot what you already didn't know when you put on your socks, gave it to your shoes, talked to two people, turned a four into two twos?
How come a three becomes one less than the four when the noose is tied around the neck of the goose that you let
loose when you had the golden head my dog that was amazing straight fire i mean you know did the
table with the underside of it i mean you know you don't think about those things but tables have two
sides you know dude he threw so much like metaphor at me my brain was just like yeah that's why i
don't do dizzy but in an exciting that's why i don't do it too often you know right is it just like it can rattle discombobulate yeah
yeah do you ever feel overwhelmed you're like oh no i don't know if i can pack all this stuff back
in i might have let too many ideas out yeah and sometimes energy like i almost surprised i didn't
just fall out of my chair onto the floor sometimes i just seem so spent you know because i try to
leave it all out there you know right yeah i could feel that yeah i could feel that that's like when you watch like Ian Curtis and you're like, oh man, I wish I had like
an ailment that like made me a more profound artist.
Which one's Ian Curtis?
The dude from Joy Division.
I think he was like epileptic.
Dude, your ability to remember names is insane.
Oh, that's crazy.
Thank you.
Don't, it's not a compliment.
It's just a name.
It's a fact, right?
What is that, a game?
No, it's just a name.
Just go.
No, but do you have a good memory for um what is the experience of being you with
that when i try to remember names i'm like it's not even close you know it's funny it's like i
feel myself losing it a little bit and i'm like trying to find out what the factors are that
would be but i think it's just life and more information coming in and there's not room for
the older stuff but it'll take me like five seconds to remember like who the other big
hitter on like the colorado Rockies was in the 90s.
And I'm like, what the fuck?
What the fuck's going on?
How did you think of that?
I'm like, you know who Dante Bichette is.
Don't fuck that up.
I was thinking Galarraga, no?
Yeah, Andres Galarraga and Larry Walker.
What about...
And then who?
Danny Castillo.
Oh, for sure.
See, I'd forgotten about him altogether.
Dude, that was a good team.
I kind of, yeah.
They're a very good team.
Yeah.
Did they... When you read, like, are you interested in names also?
Like, when you see the credits of a movie or?
Yeah, I'm interested in that.
Like, I'll always think about, like, I'll just be like, what's the movie I can name,
like, the most actors in?
Like, what movie has, like, the biggest cast?
Interesting.
For some reason, my brain always goes to two movies from the same year.
It's always, like, Zero Dark Thirty uh or lincoln because i don't know lincoln lincoln was
just zero dark 30 really maybe not that one but lincoln was just stacked like wall to wall like
every actor every bit part like adam driver has like two lines in it or something like that oh
does it yeah or like uh you know michael stuhlberg has like that'd be a good category like people that are when you see like the way rami yusuf is in or no uh rami malik malik is in um uh the master
yeah you know people that went on to be big but then they played small roles in other movies
yeah because that's it's weird when you see them stuffed then into that little role yeah like with
adam driver you're like i've seen you do so much and now you're doing two lines. Philip Seymour Hoffman
was the best at that though
when he would do a two line part,
he would still be like
full Philip Seymour Hoffman.
Oh, that guy,
there needs to be a study
on charisma with that guy.
And his weird charisma.
Dude, what is it?
Like it's not anything
you could really
put your finger on,
but even in like...
Mission Impossible 3.
Didn't see it.
Okay.
Son of a Woman though.
Yeah.
Like even as like
A sniveling guy
That you're not meant to like
You're like
That guy's amazing
Yeah
Boogie Nights
Magnolia
Killed it
Amazing
One of the funniest
Oh I'm an idiot
I fucked up
Yeah
Dude and Punch Drunk Love
Went at the end of that movie
And he's like
That's that
That's that
It's one of the funniest
Performances ever
Yeah
It's the best
Magnolia
Oh yeah
Magnolia Dude Oh, yeah.
Magnolia.
I got to revisit that one.
I haven't seen that since I was a kid.
I've told this story before, but he saw me arguing with my girlfriend in New York, and she was crying.
Yeah.
And he just looked at me, and I was like, oh, fuck, dude.
That's so funny.
I wanted to walk up to him and be like, Phil, dude, it's, you know, it's just...
What should I do?
She wants me to have a job, and I'm just an intern right now, but I mean, it's going to
take time, bro.
Well, you know, whatever you would have said. Yeah. he didn't see me he looked concerned oh yeah i'm trying to
make sure things are going all right yeah he was like is this gonna like escalate and i wanted to
be like dude it's all good but at the same time i was too worked up you're telling your girl you're
like let's keep fighting i think i'll get off the bike let's argue louder he'll come over and say
something yeah hit me hit me yeah i'll get him him with saying I liked his Jacko's Boating movie,
like something real small.
Oh, that's cool.
Yeah.
Oh, Jacko's Boating.
Something personal to him.
Yeah.
Good?
I never saw it, so I'd be lying to him.
But I know it came out of his theater company or something like that.
Yeah.
All right, should we answer some questions?
Let's do it.
All right.
Stokers of Stoke Nation nation thank you for the questions up first
um what up dudes i'm a long time listener of the pod every time i think about master
batting on the five i always put on the pod which keeps me from wasting a load on my steering wheel
as opposed to a female bosom oh masturbating on the five i think he means to five freeway
don't do that master batting uh i always put on the pod which I think he means to five freeway. Don't do that. Masturbating.
I always put on the pod,
which keeps me from wasting a load on my steering wheel as opposed to a female's bosom,
with consent, of course.
And that alone gets me fired up.
So here's my question.
I've been friends with one of my bros
for quite a few years now,
and I was starting to think this guy was my ride or die.
We raged together, shot the breeze,
got late night burritos from Mucha's,
ran firework booths, et cetera.
But out of nowhere, my homie has stopped taking my
calls and he never returns them i'm used to getting dosed ghosted by chicks but by one of my
bros it just doesn't add up should i reach out the olive branch of friendship and just ask my bro
what's good or should i just take the ghost for what it is and live to see another day also big
shout out to my boy big balls matt keep swanging baby That's a long ass email. Yeah.
I don't know.
Well, first off, dude, congrats on the no J and off on the freeway.
It takes a lot of restraint, though. I'm proud of him for that.
Yeah.
Because that is a boring ass highway.
I've done that drive many, many times.
Yeah.
Sometimes you're like, I don't know.
What else am I doing?
I've got morning on there.
I can relate to it for sure. I mean, I used to crank while driving. It's just so dangerous. Yeah. Sometimes you're like, I don't know. What else am I doing? I've got morning on there. I can relate to it for sure.
I mean, I used to crank while driving.
It's just so dangerous.
Yeah.
One time I did that up to five.
This was back in college.
And this guy I knew from college peels by next to me,
head out the window going, dude,
like how crazy is it to ever see each other on the freeway?
And I was like, oh, shit.
And I covered up real quick and I was like, wonder what that was yeah if he knew you think oh yeah
or life was maybe sending you a message yeah like what are you doing uh i i just basic rule of thumb
for masturbation if it's illegal don't do it right yeah which took me a while to learn but
now i'm firmly in that camp.
Yeah, that was a long time ago.
Yeah.
Dude, my gut feeling with this is I think he should extend the olive branch,
try and figure out what happened.
Because, I mean, it's kind of weird for a dude to ghost another dude.
Did it say how long they've been kicking it before?
A couple years.
Oh, that is weird.
Yeah, I mean.
I wouldn't bail on that out of pride. Yeah, I mean, would like you'd be like i'll get this dude back well to not respond at
all would be like well he doesn't want to hang out with me so i'm gonna not yeah yeah but this
situation seems like something went down oh you think so to me i mean that's the vibe i got was that like maybe something went down
from with this dude in some way that he doesn't know about and maybe he should try and figure
it out and then if there's no response still then let it go the only situations i can think
of where this happens is where the bro who bails is not comfortable with what their role is in the
friend group or they feel limited by it
so they feel like the only and they don't feel like it's within their power to like
redefine so they just kind of like are like you know what i'm just gonna bail
but to totally ghost it's crazy it is pretty crazy yeah did it say how what the time frame
was like from first contact to like did he just not get back for two days?
They've been bros for a few years now.
He doesn't say exactly.
Because what if it's, like, a weekend?
And you're like, dude, I just didn't hit you back.
I'm busy with work.
Or maybe your relative died.
Yeah, maybe something's going on with him.
Yeah.
I'm starting to think maybe the guy's like going through so unless he's like dude
you jerk off on the freeway all the time i mean i can't right like i drove your car dude that was
yeah you keep asking to borrow my car man yeah yeah um just keep reaching out and maybe just
talk to people who know him too and see if they've had better luck and i wish you the best of luck
man if he comes back and he's like it's because i was jacking off on the freeway right what's up boys just want to say i love you with my whole heart
and you seriously make every day better thank you thanks for keeping my vibe in check anyways i need
some advice i met this guy recently and he's a total heartthrob he's cute funny outgoing and
most importantly he serves i'm really fired up about him but i found out from one of my friends
is too we both know we like this dude and it's created a little competition between us.
This girl and I aren't that close to begin with.
So there isn't much friendship to protect here.
Oh, I like how ruthless she's being.
Yeah.
When it comes to getting guys, I'm totally laid back and chill about it.
However, this other girl is going after him with everything she's got and I don't have
any room to get in there.
Please help.
Love you guys.
Dude.
So I appreciate that. Sometimes you got to
be laid back, but I remember me and one of my besties were actually pursuing the same girl,
but, uh, I felt like my feelings for her were deeper and he had kind of snaked me a couple
of times with girls in the past. So I was like resolute that I wasn't going to let it happen
again. And I was laid back, laid back, laid back. But then I remember the night came when all of us
were going out together and I was like, tonight is night tonight i make my move and i don't leave anything to chance i go in there with confidence i look her in the eye
we talk for a couple hours and then we make out and and yeah and how'd it go it worked yeah and
i think honestly that was one of the biggest days of my life i think i changed as a human
fundamentally i was 24 okay i feel like for me i only connected
from my high school asking people to i was a very late primer i lost my virginity to this girl i
was like so gutsy in high school like prom whatever i'd go to you know i remember going
out to one of the most popular girls and being like hey uh you won't go to dance with me she goes
um yeah if lance doesn't ask me i'll definitely go with you and i was like sick hell yeah let me
know how it goes no i was fearless but at this age
I'm like see I don't know maybe it's not as fun
but I always feel like
the guy it's not like
you're trying to like snake the last parking spot
it's like he's gonna like
one of assuming you're
quite different people he's gonna
prefer one of you to the
I mean there's gonna be a connection there or there's not
there's only so much
you can do
yeah what are you going to do
like you can't win him
yeah
but she could lose him
you could lose him
you might not be able to win him
but you could lose him
you need to do something
to say how you feel
that way he has a choice
I agree
I think
you got to say something
but
I think fate will decide
you know
I think like
this girl's going to come in hot
and he's going to decide
do I like her or not and you can't really control that but you know i think like this girl's gonna come in hot and he's gonna decide do i like
her or not and you can't really control that and but you know and i'm sort of with her style i'm
sort of the laid-back one so you sort of hang in the back yeah you'd be like you know what up like
i'm just playing it cool back here if you want to cruise here like and kick it the other girl
could shoot her shot early she's gonna shoot her shot early and miss and miss i mean well that's
what i'm saying and he's so that's why she has to say how she feels about him but she's gonna
shoot her shot and be more aggressive and i think you know you gotta sort of let whatever happens
happen yeah like because yeah you don't want to but if she feels like those two are about if she
doesn't shoot her shot and she's playing it cool and then it looks like those two are about, if she doesn't shoot her shot and she's playing it cool, and then it looks like those two are about to consummate the thing that night,
does she at the 11th hour just throw down a shot and just walk up and be like,
hey, how you doing?
And see if she can do the last second hijacking.
Well, she already ruined the friendship.
She already bailed on that.
Yeah, she sees no prospects there at all.
Might as well go for broke.
Yeah.
I mean, I feel like one time'm a, I remember I liked, I started dating this girl and she
was like, yeah, I would have, you know, maybe been interested earlier, but my roommate really,
you know, kind of liked you for a while.
And I was like, well, that sucks.
That like, that got like, we're not, you know, like, why let that be a factor?
Nah, but it is.
But it shouldn't be.
I was going to ask out this girl and then we have a mutual friend who was like really into her and i was just like you know what i can't what it's the worst because
he he likes her too he liked her too much yeah but so then ask her out or something you know he did
no they they this is different i guess you're right sorry this totally did they they hooked
up a couple times yeah that can be rough yeah right but that said like you know the older i
get the more i'm like love doesn't come around that
many times like you can't be that picky to like oh oh stan already hooked up there twice well then
i gotta throw that away yeah well i think it's a timeline i think you just wait enough time where
they've dated enough other people now where it's like enough in the background where it's it's okay
yeah but i don't know i think you also you just got to check in with the person i don't know it's
it's true and there's a big difference between like hey i'm thinking about asking her
out what do you think versus hey like we're like really good together what do you think
you just do it behind her back his back yeah i was my buddy warner i always really respected
because he didn't do it behind his back but i went out with this girl a couple times and he
hung out with us one of the times and then i guess he just ran into her at like a restaurant
and they vibed and he got her
number.
And he came up to me one time and he's like, Hey, you know that girl you're really into
Allison?
He's like, I'm going to hook up with her.
And I was like, I was like, what?
I was like, are you being serious?
I was like, I'm not cool with that.
He's like, I know you're not cool with it, but I really don't think it's that big of
a deal.
She's into me.
I'm into her.
We're going to hook up.
And I was like, you really, you're the only one who's not over yeah and i was like dude so fucked up and then he was like
i know i know but i i think you'll get over it and i did and then and then the thing with him was
is he didn't care if you did that to him so there kind of was like an integrity to it be funny
though if you also like let's say he was like 75 way down the road he's like single and he's never
married or had kids.
And he's like, yeah, the one woman I fell in love with,
I never did talk to because I knew you wanted to hook up.
Yeah.
You'd be like, what?
No, dude.
You were lonely your whole life?
Yeah.
Bros, dude.
There's an episode of Lovesick about that.
Really?
Yeah, where the guy doesn't pull the trigger because of his buddy
and then the girl dies and he's like, I never got my shot.
I was in love with her.
Yeah.
So, yeah,
you can,
I mean,
you can spin it either way.
Yeah.
Well,
do you guys think Leah's gonna,
oh,
I think her and this guy
are gonna end up together.
I do too.
I think,
yeah,
it sounds like this girl's,
the other girl's coming in too hot
and she's gonna scare him away.
This guy sounds whack to me.
You know what I think she should do?
You know what I think she should do?
Pick up surfing. Yeah. Oh, meet him on the waves. This guy sounds whack to me. You know what I think she should do? Good call. You know what I think she should do? Pick up surfing.
Yeah.
Meet him on the waves.
See him out on the waves.
Ask him for a surf lesson.
Yeah.
Go where the other girl can't go.
Right.
Or see if he has a friend.
Yes.
Fight him on different terrain.
That's right.
Or not fight him, but meet him on different terrain.
All right.
What up, Chad and JT?
I got quite the problem on my hands.
I'm taking a public speaking class in my university, and for my first speech, I was doing a presentation on how to surf. All right. Or do I just conform to his public speaking schmole ways? I've included the pic of the rubric he gave me, and he really gave me unsatisfactory for that intro.
Keep up the great work, and JT, you're an inspiration with your herpes.
Thank you, dog.
Even though I don't have it, I think it's sick you're getting it out there
and chasing tail.
Boom, clap, baby.
Yeah, responsibly.
So he wrote, what up, class?
And the teacher put a smiley face in the unsatisfactory marker.
What a smiley face.
Yeah.
So that's a bad thing?
Yeah.
Well, it's in the unsatisfactory, and he didn't.
Oh, I see.
Yeah, I think the other stuff was satisfactory.
Oh, dude, I don't like this teacher at all.
I like how.
What up, class?
It's funny to be like, I went all out and said,
what up, class? It's not really all out.
What?
They said, should I go
all out and do it again?
I just would say, I don't know if that's going all out.
I think what up's as all out as you can get.
For sure, dog.
A monster what up?
Up front? What up?
That's true.
That's as wild as you can get with a speech.
I mean, it killed.
Why would you not do it again?
Yeah. It sounds like one of those comics who's like, well, that joke's a little this and that,
and you keep crushing with it.
You're like, hey, it is what it is.
Yeah, I would take the teacher to the side and be like, look, this is my thing.
It's my voice.
This is my truth.
I know you're not vibing with it but i'm gonna
keep doing it yeah yeah i wonder what his inspiration why he was not into it are they
meant to be prepping for something like is this for job interviews or something yeah public speaking
maybe he's a good afternoon is what he's looking for you already lost me if you do that dude i
would talk to your teacher after hours and and I would start with a what up.
What's the problem with what up?
And then see if you can, or maybe make your next speech
about why what up is a solid intro,
and see if you can persuade him with those solid rhetorical skills you got.
You know, I think you get more flies with honey,
so just drench that dude in honey.
That's what I'm saying.
It's a bummer that the class was into it.
Yeah.
Look, I'm just thinking he's got a lot of guts to be like, no, don't do that. You know what I think? I think saying It's a bummer that the class was into it Yeah He's got a lot of guts to be like no don't do that
You know what I think I think this teacher is jealous
He's jealous of the laughs he got
He's like you couldn't kill in my class
That's unsatisfactory
It ain't gonna kill out there
Well it's like when the industry tries to deny certain talents
But they just keep crushing with audiences
It becomes undeniable
Just leak it
Let's go and talents, but they just keep crushing with audiences. That's right. It becomes undeniable. Just leak it. Yeah.
Let's go.
All right.
What up, Chad and JT?
One of my best friends is getting married in a month, which is going to be legit, but I've got a debacle in relation to who to take as a date.
I'm between an old friend from home or a potential future relationship I've met in the last couple
weeks at school.
Both are fun girls who would be fire dates.
The problem with the girl from home is she is low-key starting to talk to a guy at her college right now,
and I don't want to invade on a bro that I don't know.
The problem with the girl from school is she won't know anyone there,
and I will have a large amount of family there,
so she would have to sit alone at dinner because I'm in the wedding party,
and I don't want to put her in a situation like that.
That's very considerate of you.
I could see a future with this girl, and I don't want to take the risk of scaring her off with a weird night.
Also, any Rex on songs to get down on the D floor, too, would be legit.
Anything by Genuine.
Keep the fire content flowing.
You guys are legends.
Deep cut Genuine?
Yeah, Differences.
Nice.
Yeah.
But it sounds like he likes the girl, the second one more, right?
Yeah.
I think he'd do that one.
That could be a good bonding experience.
Even leaving her at the table with no one she knows.
Oh, he has to leave her at the table?
Yeah, because he's in the wedding.
So he's going to be up on the dais or whatever.
Oh, where you can't bring a date up there.
Yeah.
What a divisive.
Right.
It's the worst.
That's tough.
Yeah.
I think he's got to bring her to the wedding.
He's got to say up front, look, you're going to be alone for a while.
Maybe he could try
and pull some strings
to get her
to get a friend to go
which is tough.
But
I think take her
to the wedding
because you're gonna
make up for it
with the dancing.
Yeah,
and it's just
a small part of the day.
Small part.
You know,
it's an hour at the meal.
You can even get up
and move around
a little bit.
Yeah.
Or put it in her court.
Put it in her court.
Yeah.
I don't know, dudes.
Put it in her court. You don't know't know, dudes. Put it in her court.
You don't know?
I think it could be
a little dicey
leaving her at the table.
If he doesn't tell,
if he,
what if he's up front
and he's like,
look,
you're going to be
at the table.
Just let you know up front.
So if you don't want to go,
that's cool,
but I want you to come.
That's what I think.
Give it to her
because what if she's like,
dude,
that sounds awesome.
What if she's an extrovert
and loves to talk to me?
That's true.
That's true.
But I just think it's so early,
like things are kind of fragile in the early going that you kind of don't want to throw them
into the deep end.
That's where you bond.
That's right.
You need fire to forge the love.
Okay.
Okay.
Well, turn up the heat then.
Turn it up.
Drop it in the lava and see if it comes out like Spanish steel.
Let's go.
Portrait of a lady on fire.
What's up?
All right.
Last question.
I think you got it right
Any deep cut recommendations on music?
No, no, it's funny you say that
Because I was thinking
Genuine
As much as I'm into the hits
I can't go past like
Three songs probably
That's it for me too
When I say deep cut
I mean the third song
Yeah
Oh, In Those Jeans though?
That's good
That's good
Tell me is there any more room for me in those jeans, though? That's good. Ray Lescrom, shits. That's good. Tell me, is there any more room for me in those jeans?
Do you ever try to really sing?
Because that's pretty good, actually.
I do try to really sing.
You know what song I really try to sing is Ray Charles.
Which one?
You give your hand to me.
Oh, yeah.
And then you say hello.
I like that one.
You got a nice... I'm a little Billie Eilish
there's something in there
that's very nice, I'll probably cut it
but I appreciate you doing it
leave that in there
do you ever really sing?
in the shower
where you're trying to do your hardest
yes
I'm inspired by this clip
of Jeremy Renner
from one of his first movies where he's a prisoner.
He's going to death row.
And he's singing this song.
I haven't watched in like five years.
But he's like going to death row and he's going into the gas chamber.
And he's singing this song.
And I'm like, that's so cool.
So when I saw that, I would try to sing that for like months, especially if I was hammered.
Yeah.
And I would tell people, I'm like, dude, I'm going to be a singer.
Jeremy Renner does this, watch this.
And then I'd show them my singing.
That's good.
I mean, I was at a party recently, and people were singing along to a song.
And then somebody jokingly started singing the Star Singled Banner.
And so everybody sang it together, drunk at this party.
And I was like, I've never heard that song sung by more than one person
at a time
it's always
sung by someone
with an amazing voice
yeah
and lately I've been
paying attention to like
like dancing
it's cool to watch
someone who's amazing
at dancing
but it's also something
we should all do
it's good to see
a comedian who's amazing
we should all be
joking around
yeah
I feel like with singing
it's like
unless you're amazing at it
you're not supposed to try right and I don't like that it's like unless you're amazing at it you're not
supposed to try right yeah and i don't like that i was like why is that embarrassing yeah
let's democratize singing singing like maybe try a little bit everybody's a little bit better than
they sing in the car they're just not trying that little and everyone's got one song that
they can that's right where they got one voice just right it was always inspiring watching uh
i went to like
an episcopalian school growing up so like they encouraged everyone to sing so you saw teachers
who were terrible at it but they were just like going like mr mccardle dude he was just like
i was like fuck yeah dude he flew helicopters in vietnam he was a beast that's awesome dude
yeah i liked it yeah he's singing loud he's used to singing over helicopters in Vietnam he was a beast that's awesome dude yeah
I liked it
yeah he's singing loud
he's used to singing
over helicopters
he didn't give a fuck
yeah
I went to Catholic school
so like the
religious founder
of the school
my dad's friend Tim
he would just
be like
our God
is an awesome God
he reigns
from heaven above
I'd be standing next to him
I was like
dude
I was like
at the time I didn't believe him I was like you don't really love God that much but now I've known to him. I was like, at the time, I didn't believe him.
I was like, you don't really love God that much,
but now I've known him for decades.
I'm like, no, he does, dude.
Yeah, and that's how he expresses that shit.
That's great.
That's really inspiring.
It's beautiful.
It's like, I like those karaoke rooms
where you sing together, like the little rooms,
as opposed to one at a time on a stage.
All right, last cue.
Best friend cheating on other best friend.
Hey, bros, I write to you from a sad place
needing some advice from the celestial savants of Stoke.
To give some background, after an incident last year,
my social circle is incredibly small and tight.
I have two best friends, a boy and a girl,
and we all hang out together and are really close.
I've been friends with this girl since seventh grade,
a senior now, and she's been through thick and thin with me.
She's more like family.
This boy I've been friends with for a little over a year,
and he is very timid, but the most kind, genuine person ever. Recently, the two have kindled a romance
and are now dating. Today, my female best friend texted me, well, texted me telling me she cheated
on him and how bad she felt, except this is the second time she cheated on him. And the first
time she said it would never happen again. Both times I've told her to tell him and work it out
and be accountable for actions, but both times she hasn't. It breaks my heart knowing my guy friend is so in love with her and has no clue this is going on.
My girlfriend really likes him but is having a hard time stepping away from the attention she gets from other guys.
Do I step in and tell my guy friend the truth or let it play out?
Any advice is appropriate.
As always, fuck Puzio.
Shout out to the Lawnmower 3.0 and all the other female stalkers.
Thank you guys.
Love and positive energy always.
That's a lose-lose right there. I don't think you tell the guy. and all the other female stalkers. Thank you guys. Love and positive energy always. She's fucked.
That's a lose-lose right there.
I don't think you tell the guy.
I don't know, dude.
I was... When I was a sophomore,
I was hanging out with a senior.
Yes.
Not to flex, but...
It's awesome.
And I was so naive that I was like,
oh, we're dating.
So it was like summer.
And then she went back.
So she was living with me in Newport.
No, she like came to Newport for a little bit.
I was living in Newport.
And then she went back to the Bay Area.
I was like, yeah, we're together.
And then I came back to school.
And one of my friends was like, he like told me that she was like hooking up with other dudes.
So like, you you know in that
situation we weren't like officially dating but i've ultimately respected but i just was so such
an idiot that i like assumed that we because we were like talking whatever but he told me about it
and i was glad he told me for sure well he's looking out for you and i think in that circumstance
because he didn't want you to get in too deep and get hurt so he preserved your soul a bit yeah but i think with
this one that guy probably wasn't best friends with the girl though this guy's best friends
with all right i missed that part she's known the girl since they were kids so i think if she
and the guy too though right she's known the guy for a year see my thing is like
i don't know i i would say like, I'm not going to lie.
It's weird.
Oh, yeah.
I hate that.
Don't make me lie for you.
Yeah, don't make me lie.
So if it comes up or anything, I'm going to just say what it is.
Right.
But especially, how old are they, does it say?
Seniors in high school.
Nice breakup.
I mean, it's fine.
No one's getting married in high school.
Yeah.
Well, you can tell her to break up with him.
Let's go.
You can get mad at your friend and be like, hey, I don't want to hear you complaining
about it.
Like, I don't want to hear your sad stories about how you feel so bad now that you're
doing it a bunch or twice, rather.
Right.
And then like, and I think you should break up with him.
But I think for her to...
Maybe give her a heads up.
Be like, hey, I'm good.
Hey, you need to do this.
I'll give you...
She can tell the...
She's been friends with this girl since they were seventh graders.
Tell the girl you need to say something. this dude only gets me in high school one time
man he needs to be living it up he can't he's got to go to prom with the right person and his
girlfriend's cheated twice and it's high school it's probably with someone else in school they
probably go to chemistry together a college guy oh shit oh that's the worst that's the worst
yeah dude there is nothing more just when you're in high or I remember in junior high
eighth grade
this girl
she started dating a guy
from high school
and I'm like high school
that's like
yeah
didn't even know that was
a thing
it's like a whole other world
coming down here
it's like finding out
your girlfriend's dating
like Elon Musk
or something like that
you're just like
what the fuck dude
yeah dude exactly
I would
I like the
I like the approach of like if it comes comes up, I'm not going to lie.
Yeah.
But also, I would, I wouldn't tell her what to do, but I'm sort of be like, you know what you got to do.
Also, she probably, the girl clearly wants to break up with him.
Yeah.
She's just trying to get up the gumption.
Right.
Or she likes attention.
I see that too.
That's poor guy.
Yeah. the gumption right or she likes attention i see that too that's poor guy yeah but there's other ones too where like if i were people they cheat once and are like that was
insane i'm never gonna do it again and then you're like well that's between you and your partner like
if you no you don't you wish they didn't do that but it's like it's like yeah what am i gonna yeah
yeah you can't fuck it up yeah all right should
we do an ad or do we got no ad oh yeah i forgot uh guys i'm interrupted in this podcast to let
you know once again that we are brought to you by manscape manscape thank you so much for keeping
our trims pubed for looking after our hogs for making sure that our dongs are looking fresh
and clean because you know like it or not dudes probably mostly like it summer's coming
summer's coming and the heat is coming and you're going to be sweating and you want to make sure
that you have the proper haircut for that kind of high temperatures all right you know
you're going to be sweating you don't want it to get caught up in all this
you know foliage down by your dong foliage like what are you doing
like i just like you're in the bushes kind of like summertime yeah you know summertime it's like
it's not fall yet you don't want the leaves to come out no you know like when
your your swim trunks kind of get tugged down by the waves then all of a sudden you're just like
boom bush right yeah maybe you don't need that yeah and i think with the lawnmower 3.0 you can
get a nice trim to where it's like if people see it they're like wow i respect that you know you
don't want the like whoa and you don't want the like fully
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whoa
you want the kind of like
fuck yeah
I think for me
I'm always like
I'd probably be down
to trim or something
but I don't know what
I would
I don't even know what's
normal
like what am I supposed
to be aiming for
yeah
because at least now
it's no choice
right
but if I do something
then it's like
why'd you pick that length
or how'd you pick that
oh you're worried about the response well I'm just like I don't know what I'd do something, then it's like, why'd you pick that length? Or how'd you pick that?
Oh, you're worried about the response?
Well, I'm just like, I don't know what I'd be trying to do.
It's like I'd be guessing.
Yeah.
Usually if I have a partner, I'm like, what do you want me to do?
I'll do that, whatever.
But I don't.
Well, this one, I think they do have adjustments. I go with the, you know, no guard.
Because, I don't know.
Folks, I've never trimmed, never even tried,
but I'm so convinced by this product
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Well, Corey, you can use code GODIP20 at manscaped.com.
Thanks, dude.
I already wrote it down.
I'm excited to use it.
Yeah, 20% off your order, my friend.
What?
Yeah.
20%?
You heard it here.
Holy cow.
On SoCal's most popular podcast.
Dude, it's pretty incredible, too, when you get a message from just some young person
from halfway across the country, and they're like, bro, thanks for the wreck on the ball
trimmer.
I'm looking fresh as fuck.
Oh, it's for balls, too?
Yeah.
Or, I mean, balls.
No, no, but I mean, I'm curious, because that's a different terrain.
So, with this one, I don't go all the way down, but you see the stragglers, and you
can just like... Yeah, yeah, yeah. Knock you know you can just like yeah yeah knock them off yeah huh gotta knock them
off do you have one or I need to see what this looks like yeah when I go into
my back pocket I'm just playing couple in the pool it out like a handgun I've
got one in my glove department I'll show you after the party okay cool yeah um
Aaron you trimming your your ball your dick balls yes i actually
used my lawnmower 2.0 yesterday whoa nice was it a good experience very pleasant 2.0 i mean
there's like a second generation yeah yeah yeah they're constantly improving it's remarkable
that's amazing yeah what do they have to know 2..0 is where we're at? Yeah. 3.0 is where we're at.
When you said Doc Holliday, I should
have said... Jenny Ringo?
I'll shave your
dingleberry. I'm your dingleberry
shaver. I'll be your dingleberry
shaver.
Oh, an educated man.
Now I'll really let him shave
my balls. Alright, we're going to
get into our Beefs, Babes, and Legends of the Week. I don't know if you're familiar or if you have them ready. I have one your head. No, I'll really let him shave my balls. All right. We're going to get into our beefs, babes, and legends of the week.
I don't know if you're familiar or if you have them ready.
Yeah.
Oh, no, no.
I have one ready, but.
Cool.
Yeah, we'll go around and give you some time.
Cool.
Chad, what's your beef of the week?
I forgot to think of my beef of the week, but right now, top of my dome, I'm going to
go with coronavirus.
You know, it's, I'm not really scared of the virus i'm not scared of getting it
i take cold showers you know i'm an able-bodied dude i'm not scared of even if i got it i'd beat
it i'm pretty sure but i just don't like the other consequences of it like the economy and
other consequences of it like the economy and widespread panic and you know quarantining i don't like that stuff so my beef is with the coronavirus you know it's like dude
um you're kind of bumming everyone out don't come here um freaking bounce dude get the hit man yeah
dude my beef of the week is and i i i got a lot
of feelings on what you're talking about and i'm feeling the same and it's coming up in a later one
but uh my beef of the week is with uh a pennsylvania county montgomery county i'm getting a little
political here but they fired their top two public defenders uh dean beer and keisha hudson because
they put in a complaint that they were putting
up too high of unreasonable bail amounts for certain uh mistake makers felons or i don't know
what you call them or uh defendants there it is and uh and they were also not always having a
lawyer present for those people when they got their bail set and they had some pretty ridiculous
like instances like where an old lady stole a bottle of wine and she had like $5,000 bail.
And you're like, that's not quite fair. And I guess a lot of it is they're just covering their
tracks because they don't want something bad to happen. And then, you know, their positions get
dinged. So I don't know. It sounds like these two public defenders were doing their jobs and maybe
they were doing it for attention or something like that maybe i watched the ides of march too much and i'm looking behind
the action too much but it's worth thinking about but i don't know it sounds like they were doing
their job and you know i think dean beer deserves to remain a public defender so shame on you
montgomery county damn it's like legit beefs yeah you Yeah. Is it always worldly beefs? No. No.
I mean, look, I'll just beef.
My constant beef happened at the end of the day.
I was taking a shit, public restroom.
Five, six-year-old kid came up, started looking at me through the crack in the bathroom door.
Damn.
And I just truly maybe one of the... That crack in the bathroom door is just my perpetual beef.
I don't get it.
I don't get why it exists.
Every other door closes nice and neat.
The bathroom door, always eye contact with people washing hands.
I know we know this, but we're not doing anything.
What is going on?
Right.
Is there a reason for it
is there something about it that is helping the world
I don't know
but it's really kind of
bumming me out
and I would take more shits in public if it wasn't that way
I think we all want that
I think that would change the world
yep
and if you have a kid don't let him walk up to stalls
and just
look at yeah chad what's your babe of the week this is a tough one this happened today uh it's
my car oh dude my ford escape hybrid uh yeah dude i so we went to nascar yesterday oh yeah and my car was having it was it was tough to start you know
i take it to a valet or whatever and i'd be like you're not gonna be able to start it so
it was those places where you have no choice but to valet like preference i self-park but
those ones where you're like you have to valet so like it was just like i i was the only guy who knew how
to start it so it was like it was getting tougher and tougher to start and then in the past week it
was getting like i had to fucking you know put all my weight on the key turning it and it would
finally just near and so i was like oh maybe it's the ignition switch i think that's what's going on
it's gonna be all good i'm gonna take it in i've just been busy and then friday saturday rolls around and i'm like it's really tough to start and we're
supposed to drive to nascar so i leave it in jt's garage because i'm like let's take your car to
nascar and uh so we come back again the car it just did not start at all and i'm like fuck man all right i guess the ignition switch
is done and then i so i got towed called the mechanic today and dude you sound like a doctor
delivering bad news i'm like how's it going he's like yeah it's going it's going i'm like i've never met him i was like what's up and he's like
she's done damn dude the hybrid battery is done it's probably gonna cost ten thousand dollars to
fix you gotta junk it and i was like but then know what? But then I got kind of like a little bit stoked.
Not stoked that I have to get a new car, but stoked that I really, because I love this car so much.
It's the Ford Escape Hybrid.
Guys, if you ever are looking for a new car, I highly recommend Ford Escape Hybrid.
I drove this car into the fucking ground.
You know, I drove this car and i got everything i could out
of it you did everything you did everything you could yeah you're not divorced you're a widower
yeah 200 000 miles all over california that's around the world i don't know how many times
when was this today today yeah and now you know i'm sad because i three times around the world
i don't know.
It's been 10 years with this car, and I love this...
I'll check him on that.
And I love this car deeply.
It's my Ford Escape Hybrid.
Yeah, I'm sure you do.
How far is it around the world?
Check that.
24,000 miles.
24,000.
That's it?
Yeah.
Around the world?
Oh, damn.
It's only eight times around the world.
Wow.
Wait, wait, wait.
It's only 24... I guess it's only 24 i guess it's
only 3 000 across the country circumference of earth is about 24 901 miles however from pole
to pole the earth is only 24 860 miles wow only a 41 mile difference though interesting that's That's pretty nice design. Yeah. Good job, God. Shout out.
So, yeah, my baby's my car.
You know, I got to, you know, junk you, unfortunately, but I will watch.
I will watch and I will videotape it and I will take tons of photos of you before, you know, I put you in the ground.
So, I love you.
Thank you for serving me.
But I'm stoked for the next phase of
my life so that's sort of how i'm viewing it it'll probably hit me tomorrow a little bit more but
i'm i'm sorry you're going through that dude it's all good i'm renting a jetta right now
it looks nice thanks you already moved on it's snappy yeah guys if you have any car recommendations
let me know dude my baby right now yeah oh right now okay cool no that was to aaron
my baby of the week is ty sunan he was a soldier who i met today at a city council meeting chad
where chad and i were just there taking in some local government and i had been freaking out about
the coronavirus too i was reading some chris hayes tweets today that what he's, that what we're afraid of isn't massive death from the
coronavirus. What we're afraid of is a run on the medical facilities where they run out of
enough stuff to take care of all the people who have it. Cause it's easier to transmit than the
flu and reading that stuff. I was reading it at the city council meeting and I was working myself
into a panic. And then right when I put down the phone, Ty Sooniman walks up to the mic.
He's a soldier. So he presents well, you trust him right away. And then he says, guys,
I work at a base where we have some people who have been quarantined because of the coronavirus.
I tell you this not to scare you. I tell you this to relax you. We have it under control.
The medical facilities are prepared for this. Like don't go buying masks, save those for the
people who really need them.
And don't worry, we have this under control and everything's going to be okay. Wash your hands a
lot. If you're coughing, cover your mouth and just relax if you have some symptoms, because a lot of
them overlap with the flu. And just hearing him say all that, like relax me so much. He's like,
look, you're going to be hearing a lot about it. You have to hear a lot about it, but we have it
under control.
Famous last words.
I'm just saying that I respected this guy. When a guy in the military says something like that,
man,
it does get you.
And we talked to him afterwards and he was very nice to us,
which was very cool.
Yeah,
it was cool.
And I asked him to come on,
but active military is not allowed to come on.
So,
which is a bummer.
Yeah.
But,
but thank you,
Ty.
I mean,
you just really brought so much peace to me and to the other members of the city council attendees.
So that was nice.
Thank you, dude.
This one's easy for me.
Baby of the week, my sister.
Oh, wow.
Pregnant right now.
She's inducing on Thursday.
I'm going to fly up on Wednesday.
She's got three boys, fourth one coming.
We don't know, boy or girl.
She didn't want to find out.
We're all kind of hoping girl, mix it up.
I kind of think it's going to be another boy.
Nice.
But she's killing it.
She's got something where her hips aren't rotating the way they're supposed to
or your joints are supposed to loosen up during pregnancy.
So it's really painful for her.
Oh, no.
She's killing it and giving me nephews.
I need them because I don't have kids.
So it's great.
You'd be a fire dad.
We'll see.
I'm doing a good job with the uncle game.
That's awesome.
Nice.
But that's a different game.
You got to put in the work daily.
I think I'd love it.
I think I'd be good.
You'd rise to the occasion.
I think so.
I love kids.
I think I'd let the rest of my life fall apart in a way that's to be careful about.
Interesting.
Yeah.
Chad, who is your legend of the week?
Trader Joe.
Nice, dude.
You know, I should have researched more on him.
But this dude, he passed away this week.
This is Joe.
He started Trader Joe's.
He started the first store in Pasadena,
I believe it was 1968.
He's been giving us quality,
often organic food at cheap prices.
And I just want to thank him
for providing that for citizens all over the country.
I mean, I hit Trader Joe's all the time.
I love their products.
I love their prices.
I love the vibe.
I love the Hawaiian shirts at the registers.
I mean, you really created something special.
So, Joe, thank you so much.
Joe Colombe, I think that's how you say it.
And also, only one of everything. Right's what i love yeah can of beans i just need one option yeah you go to vaughn's it's like
overwhelming yeah how many cans of beans there are and it's like some things in life i have
preferences on when it comes to beans tuna shit like that just i don't give a fuck man dude they
have good machchi balls.
They do. Those are phenomenal.
They're epic. And they're always refreshing, right?
They always have a new treat every month.
They have samples.
The samples are out of control, dude.
They're like meals. I brought it into the office.
What's the stuff that comes in a box and it's a mix
and you get
different kinds of it?
I could literally describe anything in the world.
Wait, what kind?
Salty, sweet?
It's sweet.
It comes in a box.
It can be salty, though.
Sorry.
And there's different mixes of it.
It's like granola.
Granola.
It's granola.
Yeah, yeah.
They do different seasonal granolas at Trader Joe's.
Oh, yeah.
Totally.
And then they're gone.
And then you miss them.
And then they come back.
Yeah.
You know, I always stock up on the little fried onion pieces. You ever use those? Oh, dude. Dude, they're gone, and then you miss them, and then they come back. Yeah, you know, I always stock up on the little fried onion pieces.
You ever use those?
Yeah, dude.
Dude, they're seasonal.
So I get about 10 of them in the winter.
Like a bear.
Like a bear who eats fried onions.
I love fried onions.
I use them all year.
Same with canned pumpkin.
It's good for smoothies.
A lot of vitamin A.
Dude, I've never tried that.
Sweetens your smoothie, a lot of vitamin A.
Crazy amount of vitamin A.
What's your smoothie with the pumpkin
in it? Pumpkin, blueberries,
spinach,
cinnamon, some other
shit. That sounds good. That's awesome. Yeah.
Pumpkin's good. A little sweetener. That just fired me up.
So thank you,
Trader Joe. Look at what you just did to this
podcast. You're a beast.
Thanks, dude.
Dude, my legend of the week week and i'm not even sure about
this but i think i gotta give it to him is logan paul oh wow yeah look i'm with the rest of the
world on logan paul well i guess the world split 50 50 because he's got about 60 literally everyone
does have yeah yeah but i was prepared to dislike him you know i think that his online presence is not my cup of tea
because like doug benson says i don't like tea of shit
i don't know man you're fine you know and obviously got in trouble for the dead body thing
and you know we ripped on him you know justifiably for that but he sat next to chad at the nascar
race yesterday and then um and he, he was pretty gracious to all of
his fans. And then I wanted to go up and kind of like, uh, troll him a little bit on camera.
So I went up to him and I was, I asked Bill Zarian one time, Dan Bozarian, I was like,
are you happy? And, uh, so I was like, Oh, maybe I'll ask Logan Paul the same thing.
And then, uh, I walked up to him. I go, Hey Logan, I'm like, are you happy? And then he goes,
yeah, man, every day, very sincerely. And then I was like, all right, dude, my dad's a huge fan,
like little ribbing.
And then he goes, hey, dude, I know your stuff.
I like it a lot.
Have a good rest of your day, man.
Like just super down the barrel, straight ahead, nice.
And I was like, you know what?
He's a nice guy.
And then I just had to take the L on it.
He looked over to me just with the phone.
Yeah, and we were filming him.
We were Logan Paul and Logan Paul.
And he rolled with it as well as someone can roll with it yeah so i don't know and he's jack dude
like i mean i this just might be my caveman instincts but i just respect a dude who's 6'2
215 with good composition so i gotta say he he's got a rig on him yeah yeah speak on it's a reason
he's famous i got no opinion on him i don't shit. But every time I hear bad things about him,
I always just feel bad for future hip.
Because he's going to be 30 one day and be like,
I can't believe I went to that forest
and saw a dude hanging himself and did that.
Yeah.
But what is it like to be on YouTube and all this stuff?
He's going through a weird psychological experiment
that none of us know anything about.
Right.
To live your life that, I don't know.
I could, you know. That's why he's got seven boys with him at all time you know that's like his echo chamber
but in a good way almost and his persona is that you know and who knows like how much of that is
a part of him versus him and i don't know yeah he was really working i think it's him though
you yeah i do yeah he was really working too i mean I think it's him, though. You, yeah? I do, yeah. He was really working, too. I mean, he had this camera.
He was filming the whole thing.
I mean, it seems like, I was like, damn, dude, he's really, he's not stopping.
No, he's on all the time.
Yeah.
He's not, like, embarrassed at all.
And then he was catching, like, there was some fans there, and they were like, Logan,
where's your brother?
And he's like, I don't know.
And then one of the guys was like, well, you're better than your brother anyways.
And even though that's complimentary, like, I wouldn't want to hear randos telling me,
like, what the hierarchy is between me and my family members.
I'd be like, why don't you just back off, Jack?
But I guess he brings that on himself.
You know, you film dead bodies.
People feel like they can say things to you.
All right.
Who's your legend of the week?
I mean, this is, I wish I could prep.
I'll just say, I don't have a good one.
I'll just say this on the way here.
Got an email from my accountant.
Don't owe money.
A couple hundred bucks back.
Oh, let's go.
Let's go.
Accountants.
I'm thinking, dude, the last two years I've paid this guy to do my taxes.
It is the best decision I've ever made in my life.
Taxes, I don't know how you guys feel, but I'm always like,
if the IRS came to my door tomorrow and was like, hey, we have to arrest you for taxes, I'd't know how you guys feel, but I'm always like, if the IRS came to my door tomorrow and was like,
hey, we have to arrest you for taxes, I'd be like, yeah, that makes sense.
I never once thought I did it right.
Dude, me too.
It's like I'm guessing, and every year I'm like,
all right, is that good?
Does that seem...
I'm living on borrowed time.
I mean, if you told me I owe them $10,000 or they owe me $100,
I'd be like, I don't know.
Yeah.
Especially now, he's like, dude, in entertainment, you can write off every movie or when you go to dinner, told me i owe them 10 000 bucks or they owe me 100 i'd be like i don't know yeah especially now
he's like dude in entertainment you can write off every movie or when you go to dinner like you can
write all this stuff off and i'm like all right i don't know is that check out yeah so i've just
been writing everything off and i don't know if i get arrested one day but this year i'm like dude
that's awesome yeah not this year baby not this year baby yeah come get me it's the best
when you finish taxes
you're like
damn dude
I'm done
I'm done
it hangs over you
from like January
to April
it is a massive cloud
and again
does anyone
know
I've had
like
sometimes I could do
a little comedy
someone will like
want to
you know
pay you a hundred bucks
and I'm always like
you know honestly
part of me just wants to not even get paid just to not have to deal with a w9
or whatever i feel the exact same that's gonna come back and buy me down the road because i'm
definitely losing that yeah or something i'm just don't just i don't want to make any money this is
so ridiculous but sometimes i'm like no i'd rather get paid for like a job and just do comedy for like pure art for fun yeah yeah yeah yeah well i mean it's great to get paid
for it yeah well like you know people that work at one place they're like they get one w9 or w2
whatever they give to one person that's true that's the whole thing turbo tax it for me i'm
like well i made 60 at the chuckle hut and i made right and i stack it all I'm like, it's not even that much money, but it's so much paperwork.
Right.
Yeah.
And I'm not even good at it.
That's why I got into comedy.
I think it's smart, dude.
Simplify your life.
Don't make any money.
Yeah.
I think it's worth it and a peace of mind.
Chad, what is your quote of the week?
Dude, by the way, you guys didn't tell me.
I'm sorry, dude.
I'm sorry, man.
Come on, man.
It's like, you know, I probably had some huge beefs. Who knows? But the stuff you you guys didn't tell me. I'm sorry, dude. Come on, man.
I probably had some huge beefs.
But the stuff you came up with was very grounded. I was upset about it.
And actually, TBS probably might be for the week, if I'm honest.
Oh, nice, dude.
I like that.
Next time you come on.
I'll come prep.
Quotes?
I'm going to bring some fucking quotes.
It's my bad, dude.
It's all good.
I'm used to whenever we ask guests, because you don't want to burden them.
Yeah. But I knew you would have been down so but i just didn't even think about it but now you know the rigmarole and next time you come on it's going
to be like yeah of course you guys do but i guess i didn't think of it as like a that's what i
figured i figured you'd already be prepared because you had listened and you're yeah we're
friends and i thought i don't know there's presumptions on my part maybe maybe
next time or like i'm fucking with you in a couple episodes or whatever you can call in
oh that's a good okay i'll do that yeah because actually i'll be looking for him you know yeah
yeah that's the thing you're i had like 20 options in my thing i was like which one is it i was like
who is my baby yeah Yeah, I like that.
Chad, what's your quote of the week?
My quote of the week comes from
I've been on a Harrison Ford
kick lately.
Who is it?
I haven't seen Call of the Wild.
But I just love it.
Strider did something hilarious.
He was like trash in the movie to a friend's friend. He's like, I mean the dog just love it. Strider did something hilarious. What'd he do? He was like trash in the movie to a friend's friend.
He's like, I mean, the dog just looks ridiculous.
Right when I saw the dog, I was like, I'm out.
I'm not seeing that.
She's wearing a Call of the Wild sweater.
And then he doesn't realize it.
And then after like a couple more minutes of conversation,
we realized she works in the special effects on the movie.
And then so Strider has to walk back he's
like but it looks amazing like and just did a really good job of recovering but literally was
like talking to the person who was directly responsible for the look of the dog it was so
funny i was just watching him do it you know that train wreck look you're just like yeah what am i
watching yeah yeah that's so of all people to be. Yeah, nicest guy in the world. Okay, so this comes from Star Wars Episode V, The Empire Strikes Back.
C-3PO's like,
Sir, the possibility of successfully navigating an asteroid field is approximately 3,720 to 1.
Han Solo.
Never tell me the odds.
Ooh.
Nice.
That's why I like, you know. That's a good one. With coronavirus coming in hot, don't tell me the odds. Ooh. Nice. That's why I like, you know.
That's a good line.
With coronavirus coming in hot, don't tell me the odds.
Does that movie have a lot of good quotes?
Yeah.
I think so.
I need to rewatch it.
I just Googled Harrison Ford quotes, honestly.
You know, this one, May the Force Be With You.
I've heard that one, yeah.
Nah, dude.
Dude. Aaron hit us. When Princess princess leia goes i love you he goes i know oh yeah that's
legendary and here's the thing they were sleeping together off camera he's married she writes a book
about it years later and dedicates it to his ex-wife. Which I thought was such a weird move.
Yeah, rest in peace, Karen Fisher.
Yeah, when she died, she had Molly in her system.
Yeah, she's freaking raging.
All right, my quote of the week is from the movie The King.
Dude, the way that you were talking about Ad Astra and those sci-fi movies,
I love movies that like,
I think there's something to badass movies
where we all have anxiety about death and stuff.
But when you watch a badass movie and they tackle death by being like, you know what the solution is?
Just be badass.
Just go after things.
And then you'll always be dealing with death, but you'll be going at it with purpose and direction and adrenaline.
And I'm like, you know what?
Yeah, fuck yeah.
I need some of that.
And I didn't think Timothee Chalamet could pull this off, but he was actually a badass king in this movie.
And this is what convinced me that he was a star.
This is before the big battle at the end.
He goes,
You expected me a speech.
I have only one to give.
And it's the same one I'd give
were we not standing on the brim of a battlefield.
It is the same one I'd give
were we to meet in the street by chance.
I've only ever hoped for one thing,
to see this kingdom
united under this English crown.
All men are born
to die. We know it.
We carry it with us always.
If your day be today, so
be it. Mine will be tomorrow.
Or mine tomorrow
and yours the next day.
It matters not.
What matters is that you know in your
hearts that today you are that
I fucked it up. No.
Stay with it. It matters not.
What matters is that you know in your
hearts that today you are that kingdom
united. You are England.
Each and every one of you. England is
you. And it is the space between
you. Fight not for yourselves.
Fight for that space fill that space
make it tissue make it mass make it impenetrable make it yours make it england make it england
that's pretty good that was a good performance good speech it almost slaps me at the space
between you let's get a little technical it gets a little weird it gets a little nebulous yeah but
then but then it came back real strong.
I like that.
It fucks with me sometimes because I'm like, wait, make it tissue, make it mass.
I'm like, is that contemporary terminology?
Did they call those things those things back then?
Then I'm like, you know what?
Fuck it.
Make it tissue.
Make it mass.
I like that.
Well, then by the time you make it mass.
Because it's blood.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
It's blood and guts.
That's good.
Thank you, man.
Thank you, dude.
Cause I was ready to just hit the ejecto seat on that whole thing.
Ejecto seat.
Okay.
And then you're just like, dude, hang in the car for a little bit longer.
We're about to catch up to what's the bad guy's name?
Oh, Carter Verone.
My dog.
Who's that?
He's the villain in too fast, too furious.
Oh yeah, sorry.
Dude. I saw, I follow Toretto Tuesday on Instagram,
and they had this meme, it was like, bring back Carter Verone.
I was like, fucking thank you.
Very good idea.
I got a quote from memory.
Actually, just look it up.
Interspace, bad at night, you look it up, but those at home.
How badass space is and all that stuff.
There's a TED Talk right now about a guy.
He's teaching you how to...
It's a master class.
Sorry, on how to travel to space.
Yeah, it's my favorite one.
Okay, that's insane.
I thought that was a joke when I saw that.
But that guy, his TED Talk,
it's like a 20-minute talk about how we can go to the moon
and we can dig for resources there
and mine for resources and whatever.
And at the end, he's getting so worked up and so stoked that,
I'm going to misquote it, but he's like,
we can go to the moon and we can mine for enough.
We can go there without the resources and mine for enough
to make it back to Earth.
We will do that, and I will lead that expedition.
Whoa.
And I'll put that flag in the moon.
And he ends it like so jacked up
you're almost like oh come on this is ted talk he's almost like too rattled up take it down
but dude i was like yeah he is standing in front of the world like i'm gonna go to the fucking moon
dude love it dude dare mighty things what's his name i don't even know the last one if for anyone
in high school what this is like i think about this all the time when i was in high school
we could write instead of valedictorian writing a speech like x amount of kids could submit a speech and try to
get theirs picked and mine did not get picked but i was so bummed because i had i liked this line at
the end i took my whole thing about how like we're all different but we go through this thing together
you know and i'm like some of us are good at sports and this and this. And then I some of us do this and then pick funny anecdotes from high school, like the one kid who did this.
And at the end, I was like, but whether you're at that party or you weren't or you're in that class or you weren't like we all went through this experience together.
And that's why today we graduate not as 248 individuals, but as the class of 2002.
And I was like, stoked on that line.
And they didn't pick it. I'm like, god damn it.
You put your heart into it.
I put my heart into it. I even had to perform it
to try to win.
Who did they pick?
Someone who quoted fucking poets.
Was it good?
Smart. Not that interesting.
But no soul?
I mean, I don't want to talk shit. It was good.
But it just didn't get you.
They didn't make it tissue.
They didn't make it tissue.
I felt no tissue, felt no mass.
Make it impenetrable.
I don't know what to say.
It's a great song, but I thought it would be kind of fun.
For sure.
Chad, do you have a phrase of the week for getting after it?
My phrase of the week for getting after it is,
let's kill the hybrid battery.
Nice, dude.
That just goes back to my car.
Mine is just a word, one word.
It's a word I learned the other day.
Gutter snipe.
It's a scruffy and badly behaved child who spends most of their time on the street.
Gutter snipes.
Like it.
No phrase. I got the fist pump. Some snipes. Like it. No phrase.
I got the fist pump.
Some of my friends do this.
Instead of a high five,
instead of a wave,
when we say goodbye,
we just go.
That's solid.
And the other one does it back
kind of Braveheart style.
Jacks you up.
Really, in front of my,
I was buying a donut one time
at a store.
My buddy drove by it
and I went to wave
and he just gave me one of those.
That's awesome.
And I just gave one back
and then I bought a donut
and I felt so empowered.
When you throw that at me, it hits me like a kinetic burst. Yeah. Toss me one of those. That's awesome. And I just gave one back, and then I bought a donut, and I felt so empowered. When you throw that at me,
it hits me like a kinetic burst.
Yeah. Toss me one.
That's a good one.
You gotta stay in the pocket, though,
to give it back. Yeah, you gotta corral it.
Or kinda channel it back. Yeah, corral it a little bit.
Right back at you. That's right.
Yeah.
Plus, in this coronavirus time, you're not supposed to be shaking a ton of hands,
so just throw up a little something
Well yeah let's throw those up
And put a bow on this thing
Aaron
This is fun
Aaron we can't see your hands anymore
I know it's tough dude
You're obscured
He's like Fred and Howard Stern
For sure
Huddled up in his sleeping bag
Alright this is fun Corey thank you so much for coming on like Fred and Howard Stern for sure he's like huddled up in his sleeping bag all right this
is fun Corey thank you so much for doing this is great I miss you guys I miss you so much
dude uh guys check out Corey LaCossack on Instagram yeah anything you want to plug
oh uh no yeah an Instagram address of gang is where all our videos are up for that thing and
my last name you'll never be able to spell it, but if you find me on Instagram, I'll put some shit up on there too.
I'm thinking about going with a stage name.
I don't know what it is yet.
If you've got ideas, hit me with a stage last name.
My last name is too long, too many letters,
and I'm about to bail on it.
It's just not happening.
Corey Lowe.
Corey Lowe.
Corey Lowe.
Corey Love.
I think there was a good point guard back in the day on the AAU circuit.
I don't think he ever made it to the league how do you know the au circuit i was just plugged into a lot of different
things that's incredible a lot of highlight reels cory love i like that he was in brandon jennings
class um dude yeah cory's amazing guys one of the funniest guys alive i think and so yeah check out
his stuff and check out the dress-up gang yeah dress, Dress Up Gang on Instagram. Corey Lukasik on YouTube.
Who do you think is the smartest person who ever lived?
I mean, it's got to be Newton, no?
Yeah.
I don't know.
I do want to know that.
And I want someone who knows.
Okay, like Napoleon is a great military guy.
I want someone in the military to explain to me why he's such a genius.
Because I don't know military shit. you ever been have you read war and peace no i kind of want to read
that war and peace i read war but i didn't read peace the the the art of war i want to read the
art of war actually oh sun tzu yeah i read that in seventh grade to help me with fantasy football
did it work i won a title that year did you yeah and i read it because in wall street which was
my favorite movie at the time yeah it's always being referenced that's like the sacred text right yeah yeah i'm gonna buy it yeah
never read it what's your favorite book uh what is my favorite book i don't know you read soldier
of the great war no it's my favorite fiction book i think that sounds badass check it out stokers
yeah check it out all right all right
yeah all right thanks for coming on man you're a beast
if you need advice
these guys are really nice you wanna know You want to know what to do and where to go.
When you need someone to guide you,
she's the half-throat beside you.
Go in deep.
Go in deep.
Let's go deep.
Go in deep. Get in there. Deep. Let's go deep I'm going deep
Cat and game
Deep