Going Deep with Chad and JT - EP 178 - Burger King, Break Up, Meghan Markle
Episode Date: March 17, 2021What up Stokers, this week Chad and JT talk about the Burger King controversy, Meghan Markle on Oprah, and JT's breakup. Sign up for new merch here: http://www.shopcgd.com​​​...​​​ Sponsored by Manscaped: Get 20% Off and Free Shipping with the code GODEEP20 at Manscaped.com. If you wanna trim your pubes during a contagion.
Transcript
Discussion (0)
Uh, go for it.
Dan with the one heart.
What a lunatic.
Should I write this to Dan?
Yeah, ask me to do the one minute version.
And this is to you guys
Why don't you spray the olive oil on my ass
Call me Rick
And then let's fire up the air fryer
Cause my ass is going in the
I don't know
What's up Stokers of Stoke Nation
This is Chad Kroger coming in with the Going Deep with Chad and JT podcast.
Guys, before we begin, I want to remind you once again that we are brought to you by Manscaped.
Manscaped, thank you so much for keeping our trims pubed, for looking after our hogs,
for making sure that our dongs are looking fresh and clean because...
You know, guys have dongs. Ladies have vaginas.
I wouldn't box yourself into that. What's upinas i wouldn't box yourself into that what's up i wouldn't box yourself into that oh you think i'd keep it just open like people have genitalia
yeah people have genitalia yeah and then but here's something everyone has genitalia everyone
has pubes i wouldn't box yourself into that either really that everyone
has genitalia i'm not sure that that's how it is or kosher at this point
well everyone has pubes right for sure
okay well for the people who don't have pubes, you can turn off the podcast for this portion or just skip forward.
Because this company is called Manscaped and it's for people with pubes.
And COVID spring break is right around the corner.
You know what that means.
Spring break is in your pants.
Woo!
You don't want a wild and untamed mountain man down there in your fucking jorts. You want that in your soul, not on your hair.
It's sort of like people say you want people to know that you have a lion inside you,
but you want to let them know that you've tamed it, but he still lives inside you,
and he's capable of that roar, and I think well-trimmed pubes get that point across yeah that's some
jp young and psychology stuff right there right right right so let people know that you have
the darkness within with a well-trimmed set of pubes uh and if you want to get that well-trimmed
set of pubes even veronica corningstone wouldn't say no to this pants party
because the party's in your pants.
And for everyone preparing for a pants party this spring break,
I have an exclusive 20% discount.
Use code GODEEP20 at Manscaped.com.
That's GODEEP20 at Manscaped.com.
Guys, we also have merch.
I don't know if you saw on our socials, but we dropped some fire, fire merch.
JT is rocking the lift heavy
feel heavy shirt
which I think is the best description for JT
JT
when you
when you wake up in the morning
what do you tell yourself you're going to do
get through it
and you say you're going to lift heavy
oh and I'm going to lift heavy and feel heavy every day of the week baby
yeah you got to you got to move some weight if you're ever lift heavy oh and I'm gonna lift heavy and feel heavy every day of the week baby yeah you got to
you gotta move some weight if you're ever feeling bad
just put some steel overhead you'll feel better
exactly
and then also we have a Jabow shirt
Strider has a Dank IPA shirt
some Stoke Nation shirt
Stoke Nash
a hoodie
an epic hoodie which I'm really fired up on
a pink Stoke Nation shirt which I'm really fired up on. A pink Stoke Nation shirt, which I'm really fired up on.
That's really cool.
What else do we have?
Small dong shirt, of course.
We've got the In-N-Out style one.
We've got the Fox News one.
Yeah, you can support the pods, In-N-Out going deep.
And then a Fox News-esque Chad and JT one.
Yeah.
An ode to Waters World, who I hope we can mend that.
You reached back out to him.
Yeah, and he said, Jesse likes this stuff.
He's like you burned that bridge bro.
You know when I say fuck him.
Yeah.
Kiss my ass.
Yeah.
But I would go back on that.
We'll give him a reason to want us to be back on.
That's the thing.
That's what needs to happen.
Yeah you can't ask to be on.
You need them to be like,
dude, bros, we need to have you back on.
You're like, say you're sorry.
Yeah, don't ask to be invited to the party.
Just display something that the party would need
and then you'll get that invite.
Yeah, that's the best way to go about life.
Present yourself with certain value
even if you told the world you have a small dong.
I don't know where I'm going with that, but you guys get what I'm getting.
Yeah, I mean, we're kind of banned for some bullocks anyways.
Yeah.
It wasn't that inflammatory what we said.
No.
I get why they were upset.
They told us no shenanigans.
Mm-hmm.
But I didn't know being honest about how small my dick was was shenanigans.
I thought it was a legit um you know what I I think I think we were just putting out into the world a certain sense of
vulnerability and I think that they just weren't ready for it and the and maybe they're just um
I just wish we could sit down with them and they'd be like, guys, listen, like, we respect how vulnerable you were.
We respect the courage.
But we're not there yet.
Our audience is not there yet.
We're working towards it.
And maybe someday we can.
A dialogue would have been nice.
Meet in the middle.
Yeah.
For sure.
Yeah.
We'll get there.
Absolutely.
We'll get there.
I think every fence gets mended.
No. Bridge gets burned I think nothing is separated forever nothing is permanent no if you have a beef with someone to me that's just energy between you and
that other person and energy wants to be resolved totally Totally. I mean, time heals all.
It doesn't heal small dongs, but it heals burned bridges.
And I think the farther away you get from the reconciliation,
the more beautiful it'll be when it happens.
It is going to be a great moment.
I'm really looking forward to that.
And, too, with, like, grudges, I hold grudges for a week
because I've got that goldfish brain.
And they'll be like, you're supposed to be mad at that guy.
I'm like, for what?
You are so nice that sometimes I'll get advice.
They'll be like, hey, this person's pissing me off.
And you'll be like, nah, man.
And then I'll be like, Chad's right.
They're not pissing me off.
But then I'll go home and talk to somebody else about it. And they're like, that person's a piece of shit. And I'm like Chad's right they're not pissing me off but then I'll go home and like talk to somebody else about it and they're like that person's a piece of shit
and I'm like Chad said they're cool
yeah is that good or bad I don't know
I think it's good I think it's good
I don't know yeah I've never
really been able to detect when people are talking
shit to me you know in high school
like people are like dude why don't you
have your man in a fight and I'm like
well I missed every opportunity like I would people would tell me you know, in high school, like, like people are like, dude, why don't you, have you ever been in a fight? And I'm like, well, I missed every opportunity. Like I would, people would tell me,
you know, uh, like a day or hours after they'd be like, you know, like I was trying to fight you,
right? I'm like, I thought he was just saying what's up. Right. So I've never really had the
opportunity to throw down because I just, you know, uh, when people try and square up on me,
I just think they're, you know, being homiesies i think that's why you get along so much better with the schmoe kevin yeah is because i take all of his aggression as
aggression yeah and i'm like fuck you dude yeah like don't talk to me like that i will fucking
kick your ass yeah and you take it as just like i think he's being hilarious puppy dog yeah
he cracks me up dude in our intro when you said veronica who was the veronica that was
mentioned the man's veronica corningston took me a second to get from anchorman right uh because
they highlighted they're like please say this line and i didn't i first i was like and then i got
veronica corningston so i initially thought that they were referencing veronica vaughn
from billy madison which made me think about about Chris Farley's performance where he's like, that Veronica Vaughn is one hot piece of ass.
I would know.
And then Billy's like, no, you wouldn't.
He's like, no, I wouldn't.
And it made me think about what are the best cameos in movie history?
Because I think that's kind of a cameo.
Chris Farley has a lot of good ones because he's really funny in Dirty Work, too.
Yeah.
Chris Farley.
Will Ferrell.
Will Ferrell in Wedding Crashers.
Wedding Crashers, yeah.
That's got to be one of the best.
I know that's one of Strider's favorites.
He just knocked that one out of the park.
He's so funny in it.
Him in Starsky and Hutch is really funny.
Robert Downey Jr. in the movie Chef is really good.
I haven't seen that.
Bill Murray in Zombieland.
That's a good one.
Brad Pitt in...
What's the Ryan Reynolds Deadpool?
Oh, I didn't know he's in that.
He gets like...
He's a brief cameo where he's getting electrocuted.
I walked out of Deadpool.
You did? Yeah. It's too like i felt like i was talking to like witty 12 year olds right i was like enough
yeah no i'm not i'm not really on board with the uh super sarcastic like break the fourth wall
kind of shit it was a little cheap to me yeah um people love that i guess it's killing it yeah um not really my style though i don't
there's yeah do you like in a movie when they sort of like wink at you they're like
and you're the audience watching this and isn't this ridiculous one of my favorite movies does
that 24-hour party people this steve coogan movie about the manchester music scene but
i don't know.
It genuinely felt clever with that movie.
And like in Annie Hall, there's some of that,
and it genuinely feels clever.
But with Deadpool, it felt, I don't know,
a little cheesy or easy or something.
So I wasn't into it.
So I can like it, but I'm with you.
Ordinarily, I don't like it.
Do you think it's Ryan Reynolds sort of like dry humor?
I like his humor in doses, but I don't know if I can do two straight hours of it just
like hitting me over the head.
Yeah.
I think I'm...
My friend had a really good friend who had that kind of humor, who like everything he
turned into kind of like a, oh, really?
Is that what you think?
And I'd be like, I don't think this is the right moment for a kind of like a oh really is that what you think and i'd be like
i don't think this is the right moment for that kind of tone yeah like i'd be like hey like let's
go to pedro's tacos over bagel shack and he's like oh big man with the big call yeah
and i'd be like what are you talking about i'd be like why are you talking like i like the guy
but i was like why are you throwing that energy yeah it's too much yeah um i'm trying to think of it but i i remember i i was there's this girl i
was interested in and um uh my senior year of high school and she's from new jersey we were on like a
trip together and she was from new jersey and every thing i would say say she's like
I'm from New Jersey we talk shit
we bust balls and I'm like yeah I've hung out
with east coast people before I get it
but everything I would say she'd be like
yeah I think we're gonna go get
like a you know a fucking
croissant and she's oh you're gonna get a
croissant oh you're gonna get a croissant
and I'm like alright
I got it and she's like I'm busting balls
and I'm like yeah but you, I got it. She's like, I'm busting balls.
And I'm like, yeah, but you're not supposed to bust balls in literally every sentence I say.
I agree.
Yeah, and she's like, oh, am I busting your balls right now?
And I'm like, all right, it's time to take a step back
and take your foot off the gas.
I think you need to chill.
Yeah, but then we made out.
Hey, but that's what it always reads to me as.
You know what i mean there's like a there's
like a uh that energy it feels a little desperate to me i'm like why aren't you just like saying
what you actually think yeah i'm like you want to go get chipotle it's like oh because we're
chipotle people huh yeah we're just basic bitches i'm like no it's like eight bucks and it's right
there yeah i'm like let's just go to Chipotle.
Yeah.
You know what does bother me is when people sort of try to brag on you for being kind of basic.
I was with my buddy and Mr. Deeds was on TV.
I'm like, dude, let's watch Mr. Deeds.
And he's like, you have poor taste.
Nice taste, dude. You're going to watch Mr. Deeds? You're going I'm like, dude, let's watch Mr. Deeds. And he's like, you have poor taste. Nice taste, dude.
Like, you're going to watch Mr. Deeds?
You're going to enjoy an Adam Sandler movie?
I'm like, yeah.
I also enjoy Disneyland.
Do you have a problem with that?
He's like, yeah.
Yeah, I do.
You're not sophisticated.
And I'm like, can't I just enjoy, you know, these things were made to be enjoyed.
Can I just enjoy it without your fucking, you know, indie rock bullshit?
It's people who define themselves by what they're not, but not by what they are. Yeah.
And I always think that's kind of a, it's kind of not as cool.
Yeah. Yeah, I don't know. And I've always taken a great deal of pleasure in enjoying
the things that are kind of cheesy to enjoy.
You should have the things that you like that don't fit in with what's like culturally good.
Yeah. It's like if I like a Grand Slam at Denny's, I like a Grand Slam at Denny's.
That's me with my CrossFit documentaries. I just watch them non-stop.
They do something in my brain that feels right. And I like that that's my weird little quirk.
Yeah. Even Fast and the Furious. People try to rag on, you know, they'll be like,
do you like Fast and the Furious? I guess to rag on, you know, they'll be like, you like Fast and the Furious?
And I guess nowadays, you know, people are more kind of like.
It's almost Keanu Reeves to itself.
Yeah, it's a legit franchise. But, you know, in college, in high school, people would kind of rag on me a little bit for that.
They'd be like, why do you like Fast and the Furious so much?
And I'm like, why do you like fucking Manchester by the Sea so much?
Well, now you've built a sizable fanhood off of liking Fast and Furious.
So I think you saw the...
Hold on, my voice there.
I think you saw the forest through the trees.
Thanks, dude.
Thank you.
Dude, so I went through a breakup.
Yeah.
Crazy.
Sorry, man.
It's all good.
Dude, it was interesting.
It's the first time I've been through a breakup where I was like, oh, the timing's just not right.
Yeah, I think for a while you weren't really yourself.
You're always kind of like you're a little bit more anxious than you usually are.
And that can't be a good, you know I don't know I think it's a if
you're able to recognize that and sort of do what you think is necessary I
think that's the right move mm-hmm does that make sense
totally yeah you got to take care of yourself. Yeah. I think, you know, it's hard for me, you know, because I tend to people please.
So it's like if I'm not happy in like a certain relationship or something, I'm sort of like, well, I got to stay in it because I don't want to, you know, upset them.
But I think it's... It's hard.
Yeah, it's best for both people to...
And it's more sort of kind to them
when you realize that it's not right.
It's hard to have someone you love mad at you
or to be mad at them because I vacillate.
There's moments where I'm like,
oh, I made the wrong decision.
And then there's moments where I'm like i made the wrong decision then there's moments where i'm like no i'm really pissed yeah and
you kind of don't know how it's all going to shake out right but you just have to do what
you think is best yeah and just kind of not ruminate on the uncertainty of it all yeah it's uh it's painful yeah it's tough but you'll power through them
you lift heavy you feel heavy no choice but to bounce back you'll get back out there with huge
deltoids both you know physically and emotionally and you'll fucking dominate the scene thank you
brother yeah and then you'll find that soulmate, and you guys will, you know, produce little JTs that will, you know, just their first word will be a Thoreau quote.
That'd be dope.
The first sentence.
I think I'm ready for that.
I think I'm ready to settle down. I think I'm done just playing the field and trying to see who's the hottest person
I can hook up with and kind of just, I don't know, just doing what feels good. I think I'm ready to
just be with one person and hunker down in that foxhole and get through life together yeah
but i think you know you can't force that either i kind of went into this relationship being like
because i had i had really hurt like two people over summer while dating you know ended one
friendship because i kind of was let it get into the sexual realm and then didn't realize I was kind of like using my friend and not really looking out for her best interests emotionally.
And then, so we're no longer friends.
And then I dated another girl at the end of summer who really fell for me and I didn't reciprocate and I should have just stopped it when I knew she was in more than I was. And then I just kind of
kept going because I thought I was being nice by still going, but I was really just kind of
hurting her. And then so I was like, okay, I'm done. I'm just going to date someone. I'm going
to be all in and it's going to be my person and we're going to get married and have kids. And
then, you know, I was like, Oh, I'm kind of like,
I'm trying to control these things too much. But now I'm, I kind of got humbled by all this. I think I'll be a better boyfriend in the future because of all that. Yeah. Like, like I, even
like I was thinking about like dating profiles where they're like, people are like, these are
my love languages. These, this is what I'm looking for in a relationship. Like trust,
commitment, honest communication. I'd be like, Oh God. I was like, why are my love languages. This is what I'm looking for in a relationship. Like trust, commitment, honest communication.
I'd be like, oh God.
I was like, why are you writing all that?
But now I think about it, I'm like, well, it's a dating profile for romance.
Like they're literally trying to give you like a blueprint for what's going to work
for them as a couple.
And I always thought that was kind of boring or putting the cart before the horse.
But now I'm like, no, that's like honest representation.
Like that's a person who is kind of done fucking around and being like, hey, I'm fun.
Like they're more like, hey, no, this is what I'm looking for.
This is what I need.
Fuck all the other bullshit.
Yeah.
And it is kind of boring, but it's also kind of where I'm at at this point.
Yeah.
I'm just kind of boring.
Does that make sense?
Totally.
But you know, who knows?
I don't know, man.
I just feel like I'm like 33 and I just suck at dating.
I'm just fucking terrible at it.
I don't think you suck at dating.
I'm kind of bad.
I've never dated anyone for longer than like a year straight.
That's fine.
I know, but like all my friends are like getting married, having kids.
They all have like the most solid relationships.
Compare and despair.
You're a complicated guy.
You need a complicated lady.
Yeah.
Maybe.
Maybe you need like a super simple lady.
The complicated thing sounds more exciting, to be honest.
Yeah.
Yeah, I think, well, it's just, you know, everything's a learning experience.
And you're just sort of figuring out what's right for you.
And, you know, in due time find you'll find the right one it's just uh you know it's all sort of i feel like
it's all sort of you know it's your path and it's just leading towards the relationship that will
be perfect for you you know at least you're not yeah you didn't rush into one and get super
serious and now you're kind of in regret you know what i mean what do you mean like
get married in your early 20s and now you're kind of you know you didn't really figure out what you
what was right for you and now you're sort of in between a rock and a hard place yeah yeah it's
like the the crossfitter josh bridges says the good thing about being because he's like the oldest
guy to compete in the crossfit games he's like the good thing about being old is you have the data.
You know when you can push.
So I have a lot of data now on what works for me in a relationship
and what kind of person I want to be with
and where my weaknesses are and where my strengths are.
I just, I'm just so, I just, you know what scares me?
It's like when you're like, you learned a lot.
I'm like, can I just be done learning?
Can I just be done learning can i just be done learning lessons yeah like this last relationship taught me a ton like it might have
been the most i've learned about my side of the street in my past relationships like there was
moments where we were having a tough time where i wanted to call one of my exes and be like hey
i really fucked up i didn't because you know, just what's the point?
It would have just been selfish on my part. But I was like, okay, I see now why, what that person
was talking about back then, which was cool. But God, I think I'm good now. I got it.
thanks for all the lessons god but i'm 33 yeah i'd like to just get into the peaceful chill stage of yeah and then big ups my brother got engaged yeah dude shout to chris you know
his beautiful wonderful soon-to-be wife becca lyle what up guys so pumped
and uh he's the best
yeah we've been working together with him
it makes my heart sing when I see
you guys communicating and having a good time
it's like my brother's hanging out
he's the best dude
he is awesome such a good guy such a fun
hang easy hang too
and just a beast
yeah when I was
when I knew we were going to break up
and I was just kind of suffering I just went over to his place
and I was like bro can you just hold me
and he got behind me and just rubbed my back and just held me for like a minute
it was
exactly what I needed
yeah yeah that's great
he's the best but yeah congratulations
Chris so pumped for you dude
do you know when they're going to
tie the knot? Not sure yet.
I don't know.
I think they're thinking
late this year.
Oh, late 2021.
Yeah, depending on
the state of the world.
It's more about
where we're going to do
the bachelor party for me.
Oh, yeah.
Are you in charge
of organizing that?
Yeah, and my brother
wants to go to a mountain town
and he's like,
we'll just do acid
and play beer pong.
Yeah.
But my brother,
it's going to be 30 guys. Really really he's got like the whole fantasy football
crew from his high school friends and then he's got all of his college buddies
and yeah it both numbers about 15 Wow and when we were teenagers and spoiled
little princes our family used to take us to the Bahamas and we'd bring some
friends to yeah Atlantis yeah and I'm like, we got to go back to Atlantis.
We got to go full circle.
And I asked all of his high school buddies over comms and called, dude, I was like, where
do we need to go?
They're like, we got to go back to the Bahamas.
So I'm trying to talk my brother into that.
Yeah.
And you can't just have 30 dudes in a house for a weekend.
We got to go out and burn some energy off.
Yeah.
But it's going to be intense.
30 dudes in the house.
You're going to get a big house.
And 30 dudes aren't going to do acid.
That would be hilarious.
That would be a good experiment.
My brother's got a strong constitution.
He can do acid and hang out and be normal.
Yeah.
I don't know if all of his buddies are designed that way.
Yeah.
I've always admired people like that who...
Does your brother get hung over he does but it doesn't seem to make him sad yeah he's just like
I feel like shit I'm hung over yeah but he's not like bumming the way you or me
would what what is that how do you how do you like is that just you know your
your chemical makeup are you just do you think he's
i blame you for me really no i'm kidding but but like in that moment i thought that yeah because
i'd never used to have that and then as you and me got closer and you were like i get the worst
hangovers i started to get it i was like maybe it's some kind of osmosis yeah no i don't know
what it is i think we're just sensitive, right?
I think so.
But he seems sensitive.
He is really sensitive.
He's got a really tender heart.
Yeah.
I don't know.
Like him and Reggie and those guys, they just can kind of, and I used to be able to do it with them.
They can just kind of power through.
Yeah.
I don't think they're as anxious as I am.
Right.
I have a lot more anxiety than those guys.
Yeah.
My brother doesn't have a ton of anxiety.
Yeah.
I think for me it's sort of like I always just feel like I have stuff to do, you know?
And then when I get hungover, it's like, well, now I can't do what I need to do.
I guess maybe that's part of it.
Totally, totally. And I'll be like, I feel like now I can't do what I need to do, and I'm fucked.
But that isn't that, but you don't always have stuff to do.
Yeah, but that's just how I feel, though.
Me too.
I mean, my mom will always say it's because I'm too hard on myself.
She says, like, because I give myself get myself like a report card on every day yeah but then she laughs and she's like but you never
cared about your actual report cards which is pretty fascinating yeah but i i'm the same way
where i'm like i'm a piece of shit like i don't i can't step up i'm like yeah i'm just you know
fragile and all this shit and then yeah it's maybe we're just hard on ourselves yeah because i'm always
just like it seems a little vain to think about it that way though but i think that's probably true
yeah because i'm just sort of like there's so many things i need to accomplish right now that i don't
actually have to you know it's a sunday i can relax but my mind's just like relaxing for pussies
you're a pussy you feel like shit and you suck.
And maybe that is, maybe it is just a chemical thing though.
Maybe it's like the way that the alcohol interacts with your brain.
It releases something that, you know, the opposite of dopamine or whatever it is that manifests itself as you shaming yourself.
Yeah, probably.
Yeah.
And I wish there was a way to amputate that or to sever that,
but it just seems like that's just the way it is for some people.
But I don't know.
I got drunk.
I've been getting drunk.
It's so funny.
When the relationship wasn't going great,
I found myself doing all these things that now that I'm out of it,
I realized I didn't really want to do.
Remember I told you, I was like,
I think I need to go on like a three day silent retreat.
Yeah. But what I really needed to do was just talk honestly with my girlfriend about our needs
and whether those were possible or not. And then I was going to get a dog. I don't think I need a
dog. I don't think I want a dog. I was just going to get a dog because I was like, I just want
something that just unconditionally loves me. Dude, you got to wake up early.
Everyone was talking me out of it. She was talking me out of it. She's like, I just want something that just unconditionally loves me. Dude, you got to wake up early. Everyone was talking me out of it.
She was talking me out of it.
She's like, babe, do you really want a dog for like 30 minutes?
Everyone I talked to was like, bro, maybe just like babysit one for like a day or two.
Like everyone knew I'm not cut out for having a dog right now.
Yeah.
And I was like, but that, you know, my, my like a contrarian head, I was like, fuck that.
Like that's just gonna make me get a dog more and be a better dog dad.
It's like, so you're going to get a dog more and be a better dog dad it's like so you're gonna get a
dog in a spite
to prove to your friends you can handle it look I fucking love
him look at him he's happy I picked up his
shit he's fine I'm like miserable
I'm like ghost pale and just sad
yeah
um it's funny how many people
got offended by us picking up dog shit
too in that video
yeah some people commented like, bro, what is this?
I mean, literally, we're picking up dog shit. We're trying to inform you of what's good. When we were editing the video,
there was a moment where I was like, can we cut the part out where we actually pick up the shit?
And we were like, so yeah, we made a video where we go up to strangers. We're like, hey, can we pick up your dog shit?
I think it's really funny. But it wasn't, some people were like, this is a up your dog shit i think it's really funny but it wasn't some
people were like this is a little lowbrow i guess but look you know it's not gonna be a felini flick
each time yeah um but yeah people touching the shit it did gross me out it's gross yeah touching
dog poop is but like why am i gonna get a fucking dog i don't even i think picking up their shit is disgusting
Fucking gross. It's no it's not it's normal. I'm sorry guys dogs are great shit is amazing
Shit is God, and you know I'm an angel so come on guys. Let's do just one dog shitting video
Let's just feed that need there was a vulnerability in putting that video out.
I don't know why, but I was like, this is brave.
Maybe because I was like, this is bad.
It's brave to put out bad stuff.
Yeah.
That was like in the Talking Funny.
Do you remember that?
Ricky Gervais, Louis C.K., Chris Rock, and Jerry Seinfeld, they're all talking about comedy.
And when I initially watched it, I was like,
Jerry Seinfeld's the biggest douchebag I've ever seen.
And re-watching it now, I'm like, oh, he was the only one being
like, kind of right
about a lot of these things. And what specifically?
Well, I guess with that one, it was that
Louis was using the N-word
and then, and he was
kind of like, had some
like, intellectual vanity about it
where he was like, oh yeah, I say the N word.
And then Jerry Seinfeld was like,
I don't see the humor in it, nor do I seek it.
And in retrospect, that was like a pretty smart thing to say
because I don't think some of those bits
have aged tremendously well.
You know, at the time I thought they were hilarious.
I still think there's a lot, you know, he's a genius.
I'm not disparaging Louis C.K.
It's like probably when I first got into comedy,
the biggest influence on everybody.
But there's a part in there where Ricky Gervais talks about
how he does some hack jokes during a set,
but he cuts them out of the special.
And he's like, he's like,
cause I'm worried about you guys.
I don't think you guys will respect me
if I leave it in the special.
And then Seinfeld's like,
I'll respect you more if you leave it in.
And I think he's right about that too.
It's like, no, just do your shit and put it out there
and don't worry so much about what your peers
or audience are going to say.
I mean, try and make good stuff,
but just fucking do it.
Don't, don't, if you're always worried,
it's going to start to inhibit your output.
Totally.
You just got to like,
so that's why we're going to do 25 more videos
of picking up dog shit until we really perfect it.
Without gloves.
Until we find the perfect bull mastiff with the perfect giant shit.
And then we'll know we've done it.
We've reached comedy nirvana.
Well, and the good thing too is that people will watch it now they know, you know, you
don't, you need a bag
to pick up shit we didn't know yeah so you know you don't need dishwashing
gloves you need a bag now but yeah I at Jerry for some fault he also made an
interesting point about how you she thinks you know he he'll keep jokes for like 10 15 years
where like chris rock and stuff they're like or louis they'll try to put a new special every two
years um which is interesting yeah I guess if you were
to see Jerry Seinfeld would you want to see him do new material or would you
want to see sort of the classics I think I'd want to see new material right yeah
cuz it's not the same as like a rock song. No. You want to hear the hits.
Yeah.
They debate that too, yeah, in that thing, in the Talking Funny special.
I think I used to like watching people do the same jokes just to see how they were changing them up and like crafting them.
Like, you know, Mark Norman is one of my favorite comics.
And when he'd come through LA, I'd go to multiple of his sets.
But I think that was more, maybe I'm wrong.
Maybe anyone would appreciate it the same way I did.
But I think that was also because I was trying to get better at standup.
So I was kind of studying him for more of like a student perspective.
Where I was like, oh, okay, he's doing that now.
Okay, he changed this.
Okay, it was like more I was trying to figure out how to game writing a joke the way he did.
And that's why I kind of liked hearing him
do the same jokes over and over again.
But overall, I think if I was just going
just purely for entertainment,
I'd want to hear different stuff.
Right.
Yeah, I mean, I guess when I watch like Theovan
do some bits, or Sebastian, it is really interesting to see
how they switch it up in the moment with the performance.
But I guess with comics, it's always,
I think what's impressive about comics
is their ability to come up with,
continuously come up with more material.
And that's sort of like in the job description.
Like you're never, you're always creating new stuff.
You're always coming out with new stuff.
You have to.
And that's, you know, yeah, I think,
yeah, I don't think it's the same as a rock sign.
I think it's like you need,
you need to show that you're still making funny observations.
Like your mind's always processing what's happening comedically.
And my favorite comedians are the ones who,
when something big happens in the culture,
I'm like, oh, I can't wait to hear what this person has to say about it.
Like Pedro Salinas, he's like a New York comic. When we were doing open mics together, when something would happen, I'd be like, oh, I can't wait to hear what this person has to say about it. Like Pedro Salinas. He's like a New York comic.
When we were doing open mics together, when something would happen, I'd be like, oh, I
can't wait to go to an open mic and hear what Pedro has to say about this.
Like, I know he's going to have a great take.
Yeah.
And he always did.
Yeah.
And he probably still does.
I just haven't seen him.
He's in New York, so I haven't watched him in a while.
Wasn't that Pedro?
Great guy.
Dude.
Yeah. great guy um dude yeah so guys full uh transparency in a in an effort to boost
listenership and to be able to put uh interesting subject matter in the title we're going to cover
some topical events that uh that have been making the rounds in the media yeah chat and jt react to
what's going on yeah so we're today we're going to give some hot takes on stuff that's happened that's kind of, you know,
in the zeitgeist.
So, Chad, Burger King got in trouble
because they put out a, I don't even know if it was an ad,
but they have some new-
A tweet, and they have some new initiative
where they're going to put women at the head of the kitchen.
And so they said, women do belong in the kitchen,
but they were trying to be like,
I don't even know how to describe it, ironic,
or they were trying to synthesize different ideas
where they were saying like,
oh, you're not supposed to say women belong in the kitchen
because typically that was a way to reduce
what a woman was able to do by saying
that's the only place they belong basically
is cooking for their man who is the breadwinner.
But they meant it because there's not enough women who are head chefs and they were about to change that so they're like oh no no no but like don't think of it the
way you normally think about it think about in this new way where it's actually empowering
and people are like it's not empowering you fucked up burger king yeah uh I would say I get what they're going for
you know
but I don't really look to Burger King for their comedy
and
or for their food I haven't been to a Burger King
in 20 years
that's what I was going to say
I think they should work less on their marketing
and more on their fries
because they're dog shit
they got bad fries
I don't really eat that much fast food.
I only really eat In-N-Out or Chick-fil-A.
Yeah.
And if I am going to eat the other fast food restaurants,
I'll probably go to a Taco Bell or a McDonald's
before Burger King.
So I haven't been to one in, honestly, like 20 years.
Yeah.
So this is all I know about Burger King right now.
And I just, honestly, I just don't even give any fucks. Yeah. like 20 years yeah so this is all i know about burger king right now and i just honestly i just
don't even give any fucks yeah i just i don't think it's a big deal one way or the other yeah
that's my hot take yeah i mean uh sorry i mean i think they're trying to you know like wendy's
will like clap back at people and stuff. And for some reason, fast food restaurants nowadays are trying to be, you know, a little more like spite.
Everyone's got to have a personality.
Yeah, they have a personality, you know, and it's like just fucking.
I think Burger King just showed through their tweet how inferior they are.
Their comedic stylings and their food, it's like I don't know they need
to hire the Slim Jim guy have you noticed like the Slim Jim comments on
everything yeah and they do it from this perspective of like an honest kind of
like I don't know they're like you know it'll be like puberty account and
they'll be like she hasn't called you back it's because she's you know uh too busy getting called over to another guy's place and then the slim jim guy's like
i'm still waiting for yeah and you're like oh okay like slim jim's got like a heartbroken kind
of honesty yeah but then i guess i am kind of curious who the slim jim person is that's writing
all that i always do want to know yeah like what's the face of it because you just kind of picture a
slim jim writing that.
Yeah.
I think what Burger King forgot to do, too, is they forgot to write a good punchline.
Because they're like, oh, we'll just put out this tweet.
And now they have to explain the joke.
And they're like, women belong in the kitchen.
They should have said, because we want more whatever.
But then they're like, glad we got your attention.
This is our new initiative.
20% of women.
And you're like, what are you guys talking about?
What are you going for right now?
It was just, I don't know.
They need to do some more open mics.
And now Will Forte's in a new show.
I guess it's a drama on Peacock about a guy who's going to kill himself.
Yeah.
And you said that a lot of suicide groups are upset now at the show because...
It glorifies...
Apparently the show is like a year...
This guy, I don't know the full details, but I think the general gist is that he's planning his suicide for a year.
I think the general gist is that he's planning his suicide for a year.
And so a bunch of suicide groups are pissed because they think that the show is glorifying suicide and they want to cancel the show.
It's not the show's fault.
Suicide's going up, right?
People are sadder and sadder.
Yeah.
Especially with the pandemic. Yeah. And, you you know we're just like i don't know
i do think all the media stuff that we have to absorb you know how we're kind of stuck
just getting our brains rocked with images of other people and life stories of other people
and just so much stuff.
It's just making us sadder.
But I like Will Forte.
I'm sure the show's gonna be good.
Yeah, I'm a big fan of Will Forte.
It's interesting that they'll like want to cancel TV shows because they're like, this
will make people want to commit suicide even more.
But there are no restrictions on the news.
They're not saying like, hey, I think all this sort of bad news
that you're putting out there is really hurting people
in ways that they don't even really realize.
It's true.
There's no, or even like you watch the Britney Spears documentary and seeing just how there's no laws about the paparazzi.
Are there any laws about paparazzi and that whole thing?
I don't know.
You're just allowed to film people.
Yeah.
It's weird.
And I don't know.
I just think people are putting their energy in the wrong place.
Aaron, what do you think?
Sorry, I lost where we're at.
Come on, Doug.
No, no, I was...
I mean, I wanted to jump in and say that Burger King is good.
Oh, Burger King is good?
I think it's good.
Aaron, we will always beef.
Oh, dude, your credibility is just out the window now with your five guys team.
There's one.
We will always beef on fast food, Aaron.
There's one right across, right around the corner from here.
It's the fastest thing I can get when I have no time to get food.
There's an In-N-Out eight blocks up the road.
You cannot get through that line in the time.
You got to go inside.
I need like five minutes.
What do you get, the chicken sandwich?
No, no, I get like the.
Whopper?
No, like the Bacon King. Oh. They have it on
sourdough now. It's really good.
They give you
a giant fucking burger. Like
the ones that you see in the commercials
are legit. Like that's what
you get. It's nice.
What do you think about, so Will Forte's doing a show
about suicide and suicide groups are upset
because they're saying it glorifies suicide.
Well, I'd have to see the show.
I feel like.
That's a good take.
But, and I love Will Forte.
I think he'll, he's a thoughtful guy.
I don't think he's just some jackass.
I mean, he, you know, there's a lot of that in Last Man on Earth too, being, being alone
and all that stuff.
And so I think he'll do a good job with it.
I don't think.
Plus, can you cancel?
Can you get a show canceled?
It's on Peacock.
Isn't it already canceled?
No one's going to see it.
Also, it's like art makes people feel less alone.
You know, if you see someone's feeling the way you're feeling,
it makes you less sad. If you read a book from like, especially if it's like, like an old thing, you read a book from
like 400 years ago and some guys like articulating exactly how you feel, you feel less alone in the
world. And that's always going to, I think that's always on balance going to keep more people going
than it's going to do the opposite and push people closer to their end. Like, you know, it's heartening.
Do you think if we made suicide illegal, like if you had to go to jail for trying to commit suicide, do you think less people would do it?
I don't know.
I mean, the cool kids would start trying to do it for sure
oh to be badass
I'm not afraid to go to jail
yeah
dude that's a good question I don't know
I mean
I guess it would make people you know
really make sure they did the deed
or they think really seriously about doing it
yeah that's a good point has that ever been introduced I don't know I'm sure you know, really make sure they did the deed. Or they, they think really seriously about doing it. Yeah.
That's a good point. Has that ever been introduced?
I'm sure in some countries it is.
You know,
there's those countries.
In religion,
they say you're going to go to hell.
I,
it'd be,
I just think everyone would feel so bad.
Yeah.
Hey, Billy, you survived.
Yeah, the rope broke the chandelier and you dropped to the ground.
You didn't die.
Bad news, though.
You got to do three years in the slammer now.
Yeah, the rope fell and I realized I really love life and I just want to stay alive.
Cool.
You're going to go to county.
Yeah, have fun at Long Polk.
So what are you in for, man?
Attempted murder.
Of who?
Myself.
Oh, damn, dude, bring it in.
It's a tough beat.
That's like they say if you, like, kill, you know, if you're, like, a molester, you're, like, the lowest rung of prison.
Like, everyone will just fuck you up because it's kind of like a hierarchy based off what crime you committed.
If you kill, like, a cop, you're, like, top dog in prison.
Yeah.
So I wonder if a cop tried to kill himself and then had to go to jail for it, would he reverse get a lot of respect for almost killing a cop?
I'd give him respect.
Everybody would be like, this fucking kingpin of the jail.
Yeah.
Last current event that we're covering, Meghan Markle, Prince Harry.
Full disclosure, I have not watched the full interview.
I have no idea where to find it.
I don't know where to find it either.
I just type it into YouTube and I watch like the same three
clips.
Is it really? No.
My favorite thing is when Oprah goes and then Meghan Markle
like in her like quiet like
I have to be honest about this stuff but it's
really painful voice. It was like
she's like
and then
I was silent and she's like
were you silent or were you silenced?
And then she's like, the latter.
Everyone's like, ooh, ooh.
Dude, I didn't know so many things about the monarchy.
Like Dan, our friend who's from England, some of the taxpayer money when you're an English person goes towards royalty.
That's like what keeps them living.
Even though they're the largest landowners in England.
Like they own like all of London.
They own like the earth.
They're the largest, one of the largest landowners on the planet.
It's insane.
It's so crazy.
What's your take on the Markle situation?
Honestly, I'm just sad that the royal family's not stoked.
And they're not stoked by the interview,
just that Harry and William aren't bonding.
You know, I...
I do feel bad for Harry.
He seems to have very little agency.
Besides when he joined the military,
everything else seems like he's just kind of like
getting dragged in directions by forces by other people well i i i like the idea of a royal family i think it's cool
you know i feel like a prince yeah i watched the royal wedding and i'm like this is fucking cool
like this these are real life princes there's a real queen and when and i don't like knowing that there's tension
within the family
like Megan talked about
there's some potentially
like
someone made some
racist kind of comments and stuff
and I don't
I just wish that they were all
you know one big happy
family and everything was hunky-dory, I guess.
That's sort of what made me sad about it.
And I don't know how much of a take I have on Meghan Markle.
I feel bad for her.
She does seem like she's genuinely suffering.
Yeah.
But a part of me is like, you don't accidentally become a princess.
Right.
You know what I mean?
Like you kind of have to want that.
Yeah.
And then she, I think, and maybe she did say this in the interview.
I haven't watched it, but I haven't seen any clips of it.
It's like, I wish she could have been like, and yes, she acts like she hated all of it.
She's like, I never wanted to be a princess.
I never wanted to be a part of that whole scene.
Yeah.
It all made me uncomfortable.
I'm like, that's just not how it works.
Like part of it, you wanted part of it, you loved.
Yeah.
And if she could acknowledge that and be like, no, I did love some of the attention.
I did love having a public spectacle and being with a prince and, and the idea of being royalty.
I did like that, but it was also had a lot of downsides.
Yeah.
If there would have just been a little bit of that self-awareness, I think I would have
been more simply empathetic to her rather than being kind of conflicted.
You know what I mean?
Right.
I just like, I don't know.
She's like, I hate the limelight.
I'm like, but you're like a famous, you were an actress and then you became a princess. Like you kind of picked the two careers where you have the most limelight possible.
I mean, it sucks if your in-laws are racist and shit.
And like, it sucks if they're kind of like, you know, boxing you in.
But at the same time, I don't know.
It's like.
Yeah. at the same time I don't know it's like yeah if she were to come out and say like if I were
in the situation and I was feeling the way
she felt I'd be like yeah I wanted to be a prince
cause it seemed fucking cool
but then I got to the castle and I'm like this
blows
I think that'd be interesting
that'd be very endearing
this blows I can't
do ice baths
and if she was like look one of the uncles was like racist and he'd make racist comments to me
maybe super uncomfortable and no one was checking them yeah but it was like it was all just like it
was all like and then this horrible thing happened to me and then this horrible thing happened to me
and then this horrible thing happened to me and i was like why why is it all so one thing why is it all just like you getting the shit kicked out of you
like yeah i don't know there wasn't and then harry was just kind of like
like an accessory yeah and then i don't know i just
like everybody can be sad you know rock stars kill themselves and stuff so i'm not
i'm not saying that her sadness isn't genuine but i just think there's like a lack of uh
of awareness there well yeah and also to do it during a pandemic where people are losing their
jobs and and you know losing their livelihoods and And to come out with an interview like,
feel sorry for me, the princess and prince.
People are like, dude, I've been unemployed for a year.
I think it's poor timing.
I think a little bit more about the people
that are actually, you know.
There's a self-importance in it too. Think a little bit more about the people that are actually, you know. But, you know.
There's a self-importance in it, too.
Like, she kind of does feel like, like, you do get the sense from her that, like, I'm, like, the most important person in the world.
Mm-hmm.
Yeah.
And.
Because it's, like, I think she mentions in the thing, like, you know, life is about storytelling.
And, like, you know, life is, like, a fair, you know, but it didn't turn out to be that.
And you're like, that's kind of a naive way to think about things.
But I'm quoting that from someone who watched it.
So maybe, I don't know.
This is all, like, just three minutes of footage that I watched.
But I don't know.
I guess, yeah, when I saw the clips, because I can't find it either.
When I saw the clips, I think I was just like, man.
It is on Paramount Plus, by the way.
Oh, it's on Paramount Plus.
Okay.
Yeah, I guess I was just like, man, you know.
What the fuck is Paramount Plus?
It used to be CBS All Access. This is probably a good time to say that Hulu passed on our animated thing, too,
so that's not getting made a Hulu.
Which is also why I finally called out Disney for the Gina Carano shit last week.
Had to wait to not be in business with Hulu before I took them to task.
No hard feelings to Hulu.
Or Dan Harmon, who came out with an animated Greek mythology show
one week before we submitted ours
shit happens
yeah
I'm gonna do an interview about it on Oprah and talk about how fucking sad it is
and then I realized that Hulu wasn't gonna pick up my show
which was really hard
because I worked really hard on it and I never wanted
to be famous or you know have people
recognize my talents,
but I just got put in a position where that might happen.
And now that it's not happening, Dan Harmon's the devil.
Does that track?
Did that make, was there parallels there?
Totally.
I mean, come on.
It's like, don't cry for me, Argentina.
You know Evita?
Madonna!
Madonna!
All right dude should we do an ad?
I'll go get some more coffee and then we'll answer some questions.
Yeah.
What's up guys?
I'm interrupting this podcast so you know once again that we are brought to
you by Manscaped.
Manscaped, thank you so much for keeping our trims pubed, for looking after our hogs, for
making sure that our dongs are looking fresh and clean because it's spring break in your
pants.
I'm talking to you.
Your dong likes to go to Cabo. Your dong likes to go to Panama Beach or whatever it's called because your dong likes to party.
But your dong needs to party safe.
And so when you trim your pubes, you want to use the Lawn Mower 3.0 because it has skin-safe,
advanced ceramic blade technology that doesn't nick or cut
your dongle and makes it look fresh and clean because the perfect package 3.0 kit comes
with the Essential Lawn Mower 3.0 waterproof cordless body trimmer and a ton of other liquid
formulations to round out your grooming routine.
It's the best trimmer on the market for those of you in the need of a chest or ball shave.
And guys, I mean, it's the best.
It has a light on it.
You can see your pubes clearly.
Keep it safe.
And you can also adjust the settings to get the length you like, you know?
Like, what do you want?
AstroTurf?
Do you want completely bald?
Do you want like AstroTurf? Do you want completely bald? Do you want, like, some nice scruff?
How do you like your pubes?
You tell me.
And be sure to use their crop cleanser, too.
The body wash to keep your hair and skin feeling healthy and fresh.
You'll also find the ball deodorant.
Ooh.
Ball toner.
Ooh. Spray on deodorant. Ooh. Ball toner. Ooh.
Spray on testy toner.
Ooh.
For a limited time, subscribers get two free gifts,
the Shed Travel Bag $39 value add,
and the patented high-performance reduced chafing Manscaped boxers.
Get 20% off plus free shipping with the code godeep20 at manscaped.com.
That is godeep20 at manscaped.com that is go deep
20 at
manscaped.com
20% off
plus free shipping
say aloha
to your new balls
your new beautiful balls
at manscaped
I gotta pee
oh man
guys
so we just had
breaking news happen while we were going to the bathroom Aaron confessed to me
off mic that any he you know I'm not trying to call you out Aaron but you should have said this
earlier he's friends with a guy who owns a Burger King so he was sort of incentivized to uh you know
walk the party line and defend Burger King.
Is your friend paying you for these takes, Aaron?
And has he been paying you the whole time to disparage In-N-Out?
No, no, no, certainly not.
No, certainly not.
He has plied me with free food at times, but I'm not currently on the payroll.
I do think it is.
It's pretty good.
Yeah, he better pay you more for that endorsement.
Yeah.
You're holding out for more Whoppers, huh?
How many guys do you know that own Five Guys?
Five?
None.
I don't know any.
We believe you.
Yeah, all right, Aaron.
I didn't know you were in the fast food game.
That checks out.
Let me see your teeth real quick.
No, I thought you had lipstick on them.
By the way, the Burger King around the corner is in Back to the Future.
I'm just saying.
Oh, nice.
Good movie.
Dude, read Pauline Kael's review of it.
It's so interesting.
She's just way too smart to enjoy the movie.
She's like a refabricated Americana commercial enterprise that erodes the notion of new art.
You're like, what?
What movie are you watching, lady?
I'm like, you need to be five years old
and watch Back to the Future.
Oh, is that Back to the Future?
She's like the smartest film critic ever.
She was reviewing McCabe and Miss Miller.
I've referenced it here before,
I think on the Noah Miller episode.
But she's like, it shows that even in the 1860s,
Americans wore headphones. Like talking about the isolation that the characters feel. I was like, it shows that even in the 1860s, Americans wore headphones.
Like talking about the isolation that the characters feel.
I was like, wow, that's like a brilliant way to describe it.
I was like, you were smart.
I guess she would rip everybody to shreds.
And then Warren Beatty, who's in McCabe and Miss Miller, because he just like, the book
that someone wrote about him, I think Peter Biskin is called How Warren Beatty Seduced
America.
He was like, oh, he would just hang out with Pauline Kael all the time and just dazzle
her with his charm.
And then so she always gave him positive reviews.
And then he started a production company and actually gave her a job developing movies.
And I guess she sucked at it.
And some people think he like genuinely did that just to humble her and show her how hard it is to make movies.
Well, that's what I was going to say.
Like, isn't that sort of a mind wasted to just be a critic?
I don't think so, because I think some people can elevate it to an art form.
I think they can actually write so well about film
that it becomes not as valuable
as the film.
That's kind of the critique against critics and
Ratatouille, right? The harsh
truth us critics must realize
is that even the worst piece
of crap is more important than the
critic who deems it so.
They didn't say crap in that movie, but that was the gist of it.
But no, I think like Roger Ebert,
I learned a lot about life from him.
Right.
So I think, and from Pauline Kael.
I think if they're really good film critics,
they can, and then even like the French film critics,
like all the big directors
that came out of the French new wave,
like I think Bazin was the first,
and then like Truffaut and Godard,
they were critics first.
And then they, but then they put it into action
and made some movies. Yeah, I so or wesley morris dude i was
just he was gonna be one of my things but he was just on bill simmons he had the best he's so smart
and he had the best kind of like he called uh one night in miami that movie with all like the uh
you know like uh how would you describe them i don't know like uh kind of black heroes of like
the 60s it's like malcolm x sam cook uh muhammad ali and jim brown he was like it's like an
avengers movie that is what it feels like yeah it's just like overstuffed i don't know sometimes
they can give you a framework to think about but maybe that's just me because i'm obsessed with
movies even though they all suck now i'm the osc you're just like no one has seen any of these they're like plays
movies are like jazz music now
it's like only for
cinephiles
I was really being pedantic there for a sec
alright should we get into some cues
yeah
let's do this
oh this is a good one.
Hey there, Chad, trap advice.
Hey there, Gabe here.
Heard you've been having some trap issues.
I've had the same chronic issue
and just wanted to share some things that help.
CBD roll-on.
I really like this one made by Omax.
Vibration gun.
A lot of options, but I have a Hypervolt.
He even sent links.
Deep tissue medical sports massages.
I go to SportsFit in Santa Monica and Marina del Rey.
Oh, he's an LA guy?
He's an LA dude.
SportsFit?
Mm-hmm.
I'll check that out.
Yeah, I've always been kind of a, I think it's a chronic, it's a, I don't think, I think the trap lockup is a symptom of my spine, a disc in my spine getting irritated.
might be because my spine is curved a little bit um which is just like i don't know i've always been sort of anti-massage anti all that shit because you know why because it's boring stretching
is boring getting a massage is boring i like i like being like active which is tough because
when you're incapacitated like that you can can't do sprints or something like that.
So I'm trying to learn how to get more into that shit.
And maybe a deep tissue massage is what I need.
But I don't know, even like doing a yoga class,
I'm like, oh, it's so much time,
and there's something about it
that just always turned me off.
But I think I need to look more into
sort of looking after my my back and maybe getting
some deep tissue maybe some stretches uh i've been stretching i've been doing the five tibetan
rites every morning which are legit some nice five yoga poses open up the chakras and let people know
that you are feeling good let Let's go. Anonymous.
Hi, Chad and JT.
Please keep me anon.
Thanks for raising the stoke of so many guys and gals out there.
I'm a lady stoker, by the way.
A couple months ago,
I met this guy.
We never hung out one-on-one,
but he would always DM me
and reply to every story I posted
and ask me how my day was, etc.
I would reply
because I found him attractive,
but I never acted on it.
I was kind of waiting for him
to make a move beyond the DMs.
Fast forward a month later
and I met this girl
and we started becoming friends. One day, she brings up her boyfriend and I ask her who her boyfriend is and turns out it's the move beyond the DMs. Fast forward a month later and I met this girl and we started becoming friends. One day she brings up her boyfriend and I ask her who her
boyfriend is and turns out it's the guy in my DMs. Immediately I stopped replying to him and talking
to him at all, but I didn't tell the girl that her BF was in my DMs because we had just met and
nothing had actually happened between me and the dude. I would never mess with a guy in a relay.
She eventually stopped DMing me. Fast forward again six months and me and this girl are now
best friends. She's still with the guy and she says she's going to marry him one day. I never said anything to her
about it, but I feel guilty and feel weird around him when we hang out. She also tells me that her
BF doesn't like when her and I hang out, doesn't like the friendship that I have with him. Yeah.
I wonder why he feels that way. How do I navigate this situation? Do I tell my friend the whole
story from start to finish or would that do more harm than good? I really value our friendship.
And how do I act around him?
Thanks for the words of wisdom.
Stay stoked, Lady Stoker.
Man, that's a tough one.
I don't like that you're hanging out with them.
I don't like this friendship.
It's a little bit controlling.
Well, and he doesn't like her because he knows he used to be trying to fuck her.
No, I know.
Yeah.
Yeah, dude, you got, here's the thing.
Would you want her to tell you?
Yeah, I think so, right?
I always feel bad when people live on a lie.
It kind of breaks my heart.
So I don't know, I would tell her.
And you know what?
I would do it sooner rather than later
because it's only going to get harder.
And you know what? She might get pissed at you. She might, but I think that's on her. It might burn the friendship, but, but again, your friendship will be built on a lie.
And I don't know, it could come out anyways. I doubt you're the only person this guy's DMing.
You know, he's, I don't think people really keep it that,
people who do that are typically doing that a lot.
So you might get lucky.
It might pop before you say anything,
but I would say something.
What do you think?
Yeah, I agree with that.
I think I would, I think I would let her know.
I really have nothing more to add.
Hey, Stokers.
Thank you for the joy you bring to me.
Sometimes your podcast is the best thing of the day.
If the relationship guru could answer, that would be dope.
My girlfriend has decided to go on a break with me after five years of dating.
How should I give her the space she needs
until she decides
what we are
and how would you
remain optimistic?
I have felt really sad recently.
I do love her
and hope it works out.
I've been crushing the gym
and spending time
working from home
albeit lonely.
I'm also going to start
therapy next week.
Can you let me know
if you answer this
so I can tune in?
Thanks.
I mean you're already
doing it dude.
Yeah I would
I wouldn't dwell on it. I would keep doing what you're already doing it dude. Yeah I would I wouldn't dwell on it.
I would
keep doing what you're doing.
Improving yourself. Working on your own
life. Keep moving forward in your
own direction.
I would say it's never
I don't think it's ever a good thing to sort of
wait on people and wait on how you think
they'll feel about things because you know
then you're
just sort of waiting for them to um to make their decision when it's like this is your life and you
got to take control of your own stoke you know and if you're feeling sad you know you got to get back
out there and boost your stoke because the true stoke only comes from you it can't come from her
um and uh so i think you're just doing the right thing you know getting out in the gym
working on your life progressing in your career doing the thing and uh
yeah man get back out there yeah i don't think you can
um if you're trying to do everything you can do to
make yourself more appealing to her, you're just going to be suffering the whole time. Cause then
she's more important to you than you are to yourself. You gotta, you gotta really think
hard about what you want independent of her. And that doesn't mean sleeping with other people. I
mean, outside of like the romantic range, you know what I mean?
Like try and make the romantic part of your life a little bit smaller right now and make
the other parts of your life bigger.
And I think like Chad's saying, that's the route to happiness.
It's very hard.
It's very, very hard, but you can do it.
And you're already doing, dude, going to the gym, going to therapy.
That's great stuff, man.
You're already doing it.
Writing into podcasts.
That's nice.
Doing good stuff.
Hey, dudes.
I got out of a long-term five-year relationship at the end of 2019 after finding out she was cheating on me.
Shortly after, I met a girl while visiting the Midwest.
It felt amazing.
She was a babe, amazing personality.
We shared similar hobbies, and the chemistry was gnarly.
I went back home a week later, and we kept talking.
For the next two months, she came out to visit me three times, and I chemistry was gnarly. I went back home a week later and we kept talking for the next two months.
She came out to visit me three times and I really started following for
unfortunately,
the long distance was getting really hard,
especially when COVID started and things fell apart over the next eight
months.
I started,
I spent time kicking it with the boys and seeing other girls,
but kept comparing every girl I met to this Midwest girl.
No one compared a few months ago.
We reconnected after she was coming through my city on a camping trip.
We started tacking again and she came out again a few times to visit me i had been working from home for almost a year now
and i decided to ask her if she thinks it'd be a good idea for me to move to her city while i was
working from home to give us a proper chance she agreed it took me a really long time to trust
someone again after my ex and this girl now girlfriend gave me no reason to think we were
not good for each other so i decided i was ready to take the leap of faith anyways she found set up
my place in the midwest flew to my city to help me pack,
and we drove back together.
She had always told me she loved us
and we talked about these dreams
of what we were going to do together.
She even told me that she'd move back with me to my city
and had all these promises
that I had no reason not to believe.
It honestly felt perfect
and I felt happy for the first time in a really long time.
Things were amazing.
Until one day, out of nowhere,
she stopped talking to me,
no warning, nothing.
I didn't exist.
Damn.
I thought she might have needed some space or was going through something so I gave her that space. I asked her if it had anything to do with us Damn. place and broke things off with me no explanation i still to this day have no idea what happened and feel really betrayed and hurt how do i recover from this it took me a year to trust someone again
and i really fell in love with this girl and did not anticipate this as a possibility especially
like this i'm moving back to the pnw in a few weeks and i'm going to try and focus on keeping
positive and staying healthy but things feel dark thanks for the pod boys i love turning to it while
i'm at work been fan of yours for years Man, I'm really sorry to hear that.
That's uh,
that's really brutal.
But you know what, dude?
I mean,
this is your journey to something greater.
I truly believe that. I think that
you're going through some tough times right now,
but, you know, that's sort of life.
You just go through, you know, a lot of life is just sort of riddled with failure,
and then you have that one big success.
And, you know, I'm sure you're hurting right now hard,
you're hurting right now hard but I would just keep faith that you're the dynamite epic relationship that you've been searching for you and yearning for
will materialize in due time so I would just you know process the pain power
through the pain maybe put into some squats you know you're in the Pacific Northwest maybe put into some kayaking oh that's what that means yeah
and keep working on yourself keep being the best dude you can be you know watch
uplifting stuff I would say watch optimistic stuff you know watch stuff
that makes you feel charged up on life again because you should be charged up on life you know now you know that you don't want to be with that girl you'll move on to
the next one and you'll find the one that's perfect for you and that will you know love and respect
you the way you deserve so you know i would say stay positive keep pushing forward and you'll get there i totally agree with chad man i i wouldn't
change a thing man i think you know you're leading with your heart you're available to love and to be
loved but you know love is a contact sport you're giving someone else permission to fuck you up
and that's really really hard but you, you found the strength to do it
again and you know, you're strong, you'll do it again. And then one of these days it's going to
fit and you'll find the person who values you. So just be sad for a while. And then, you know,
but don't be sad all the time. Try and keep, stay busy, work out, focus on your career, you know,
turn to family and friends. I find that when you go
through like heartbreak or when you go through hardship, it's like that Marianne Williamson
quote, like when people are on their knees, they're at their most like empathetic and
compassionate. I think that's true. I think you'll, you'll really discover what a good
person you are just through the way you deal with other people through this, this hurt.
And I think there's a lot of beauty in that so just try and like Chad said,
put some happy stuff in your brain
and keep yourself light when you're going through all this
and then you'll come out the other end
and 20 years from now you'll look back
and you'll smile at all this stuff.
That's the other thing is like when my 12 year old,
12 or 13, when I was 12 13 in my my super smoking hot gf almost left me for
some like 6-5 basketball player i was busted up dude and sometimes i think back to that and it
still hurts like the trauma is real but at the same time i was 12 bro and now when i look back
on whatever has happened to me in my like 20s or like 30s i mean one day we're gonna look back at this and it's all just gonna
seem like it was part of the journey so you just gotta kind of remember that like time heals all
wounds and that you'll get through this and also dude like that girl was kind of an asshole
like i need space for myself and that space includes just getting fucked up on drugs and hanging out with other people.
Like she wasn't prioritizing you
the way you prioritized her.
And I think she probably used you a little bit for,
sorry to be harsh,
but used you a little bit to like feel loved.
And when that wasn't enough for her,
she kind of mistreated you.
So I don't know.
I think you're better off, man.
But I'm sorry.
Yeah, I look back on my sort of romantic life,
especially, you know, through like,
when did I start really?
Like seventh grade to college.
And it's like, if I had just had like,
if I had just been like a
ladies man throughout the entire time
like what kind of guy would I have become
you know just
just fucking
nothing but net
my entire
high school and college years
like what that's you know
that doesn't really
you gotta go through the hurt sometimes to really discover who you really are.
I think also everyone, this quarantine has just like, we always get a lot of romantic questions, but we're getting more.
And a lot of it's like, hey, I thought this person was the one and then it didn't work out.
It's like, well, because I think especially during COVID, we're all looking for the one.
We're looking for that person who's going to just be in that foxhole with us.
And then, you know, maybe we're kind of pushing too fast.
I mean, like moving for this girl was pretty wild.
Yeah.
Like you probably rushed that a little bit.
And I could see, you know, it wasn't fair on her part to like pick out your place and
to be like, hey, I'm all in with you.
For her to be like, actually, I'm not.
Because it was probably just, you know, it was something to do for both of you.
Yeah, so thank her for that.
Be like, hey, but thanks for helping me find a dope place.
I learned a lot about home decorum.
The road trip was sick, too.
And we had a good time on the road trip. Thanks for showing me that new band.
They were good. I'll never be able
to listen to them again, but it was fun while
we did. I never thought I'd actually see Wyoming
until that road trip. Exactly.
Bison are huge.
Quarrel among bros.
Hey Chad and JT, I come to you with a burdensome situation.
My roommate and I have poker
night with the boys every weekend,
and usually six to ten of our bros come through to hang depending on the week.
Although times are almost legendary, a beef has arisen within the squad.
A mutual bro of ours, Sonny, has developed a habit of borrowing money from some of the boys
and has been reluctant to pay them back.
This has gone on for a couple months now, and Sonny owes three of our friends almost $1,000.
Two of the bros don't mind as much,
but one in particular, Davis, has been considering legal action.
The two have been avoiding each other
and has put a major damper on the overall vibe
that comes when we play cards.
To make the situation worse, Sonny is really fun to be around,
and my roommate prefers his company over others
despite his shady behavior.
Long-time fan, hopefully you bros can provide some light
in this tunnel of darkness.
Much appreciated, Jake.
Did that feel for you, man? I know the exact kind of guy you're talking about who's just like so much fun, but just like he has scumbag characteristics.
Tendencies?
Yeah, tendencies and you're just like, fuck man, why do you have to be that way? Can't you just be like the fun guy you are and not put me in this, you know,
awkward position where you got to pay money back to people?
But, I mean, yeah.
I mean, you know, this guy sounds like a charmer.
But also kind of a, you know, a bit of a con artist a little bit.
I don't know if I want to go that far, but, you know, moving towards that.
So I think, yeah, I think he's got to pay your friends back.
He can't just do that and get away with it because he's charming.
So, yeah.
I don't know.
Is that what he's asking?
What should we do? I mean, I think you nailed it. Yeah. I mean, the thing is, he's. Is that what he's asking? What should we do?
I mean, I think you nailed it.
Yeah.
I mean, the thing is, he's probably, like, it's not your job to get these dudes paid back.
I would, it's the parable of the scorpion, you know?
The frog's like, I'm not giving you a lift across the pond.
And then the scorpion's like, I won't sting you.
We'll both die.
And then they start going and the scorpion stings him.
He's like, what are you doing?
We're both going to die. He's like, I won't sting you. We'll both die. And then they start going and the scorpion stings him. He's like, what are you doing? We're both going to die.
He's like, oh, it's my nature.
It's like this Sonny guy, it's just in his nature to be unethical in his relationships
and in his kind of obligations to people.
So if you keep having Sonny back, more of this shit's going to happen, not less.
People don't learn.
People like him don't learn lessons from tolerance.
They might not even learn their lessons, period.
It might be so deep into his nature.
But being optimistic, he might learn.
But that's only going to come from you guys setting boundaries with this dude.
You got to just cut him out.
You got to tell your friend, like, hey, I know he's a good time.
You can go hang out with him on your own time,
but he's toxic to the group,
so he can't come to poker night anymore,
at least not until he makes things right
with these other guys financially.
I mean, $1,000 fucking dollars?
Yeah.
Does he owe that?
Even in aggregate, that's like 300 bucks a dude.
That's substantial.
But if he owes 1 a thousand bucks per dude,
I mean, we're getting into like serious,
like people aren't gonna make rent.
Like you gotta fucking get rid of this dude.
Yeah, and that behavior is only gonna continue.
And you never know.
He could get you into a position
where you're truly fucked.
And because he's just that kind of guy.
Like I remember my mom, I had a friend growing up and he was so much fun to be around, hilarious.
But my mom always knew he was a scumbag.
I had a friend like that too.
Yeah, she's like, don't hang out with him.
He's a liar, he's a scumbag.
My dad's like, yeah, he's gonna end up in jail.
And I would hang out with him but then as I grew older I would distance myself and and you know they were right and and as much fun as I had hanging
out with him I'm glad I didn't continue because um he just would have gotten me into situations
where I that I did not want to be in and then I'd be like oh was it really worth it just because he's like kind of like had like a good sense of humor um so i think you just gotta if you recognize that in someone you
gotta you gotta understand what what you know what they could what kind of a person they are
yeah i had a couple friends like that one guy was just like it was almost exhilarating how little he cared about other people.
Yeah.
So when he went out with him at night, you knew you were going to have a good time because
he was just going to pursue pleasure above all things.
And it kind of gave me a vicarious rush to be around that.
Yeah.
All right.
Should we get into the next section?
Yeah.
Chad, who is your beef of the week?
Yeah.
Chad, who is your beef of the week?
My beef of the week is with ATF agent Stahl and Sons of Anarchy.
You know what?
Look, agent Stahl, I've been crushing Sons of Anarchy.
And agent Stahl, she's trying to nail the Sons.
She's trying to get, you know, she's trying to do her job and be an atf agent but she's going about the wrong way her ethics are skewed she's spreading lies and
she's causing havoc within the club and she's you know hurting people and people are losing their
lives because of her and it's like you know is is is getting that arrest really worth it, Agent Stahl?
Is it really worth destroying these lives?
Like, to what lengths should you actually go to get your arrest?
So I think you need to think about that and think about your behavior and the ethics of what you're doing
because you're hurting Charming California and you're hurting the Sons of Anarchy and I don't like to see it.
So why don't you take a good long look in the mirror, Agent Stahl, and go fuck yourself.
It's an interesting, the name of the gang is the Sons of Anarchy?
The club, yeah.
It's an interesting name.
I'm sorry, I got to write club.
It's an interesting name for a club. Yeah. Like if you really think about it, what does it mean to be the son of anarchy? It's an interesting name. I'm sorry, I got to write club. It's an interesting name for a club.
Yeah.
Like if you really think about it, what does it mean to be the son of anarchy?
That's a good question.
Are you an anarchist then too or do you become something else if you're like second generation?
Right.
Maybe there's sort of like I was born into this.
I was born into anarchy.
I didn't really have a choice but this is the life I have.
And through it maybe comes order.
Yeah.
Maybe that's the next evolution of it.
Yeah. Until it cycles back to anarchy.
Can you, wouldn't that be so interesting to be born into that life?
It is interesting.
I think, I think it'll always be a part of you, but I don't think you're destined to
be in it.
You know, like if you have like criminal parents
i think you'll always have a little bit of that element to you right and there's power in that
it's like kind of like the the young ian lion or bull you know you got to have that danger in you
but there's probably a way to make it work that's not so uh uh don't know, destructive or something.
Yeah.
That's what Michael Corleone thought.
So you think you're doomed?
And then you join the business.
I mean, someone shoots at your dad, sure.
Well, I mean, that's why, you know,
I have empathy with George Bush for going to Iraq.
Like Saddam Hussein did try to kill his dad.
Did he say that?
Yeah, he said it during a press conference.
He's like, look, Saddam Hussein tried to kill my father.
Like I think he put like a hit on him or something like that.
Did he really?
Yeah.
I mean, so did we and Saddam.
No, I'm not.
Look, hey, we've given plenty of countries reasons to come back on us, baby.
But...
Look, guys, I understand you're upset, but it's his dad.
Yeah, I'd be like, his fucking...
They tried to kill his dad.
He's got an army.
What the fuck would you do?
Yeah.
It wouldn't take much motivation for me to be like, he's doing what?
He didn't let our investigators wear?
You think he's got a bomb?
That's all justification.
Let's go kick some fucking ass.
But I think it would have been cooler in my, you know, kind of simplified hero brain to be like,
I think George should have been like, you know, the King style or Achilles against Boagrius
and been like, he should have just trained, you know, Muay Thai, Jits, wrestling, integration of all of them
and been like, Saddam, meet me in Istanbul.
Took a neutral site.
And let's just settle this mano a mano.
One-on-one.
That would have been legit.
That's why when everyone's like,
oh, Napoleon's such a badass.
Like, you know, he won the battle of like
Australitz or something.
I'm like, it would have been cooler if just him and the Duke of Wellington squared up one-on-one to settle it.
That's what Achilles said.
Imagine a king who fights his own battles.
Yeah, have some skin in the game.
Wouldn't that be a sight?
Aaron.
Yes, sir.
Who is your Beef of the Week?
My Beef of the Week is with haggling oh i don't like it i don't like doing it i didn't like doing it when i bought my car i i i'm not looking forward
to doing it uh i've already gone through a little bit selling my car my old car. I just want to set a price or I just want to pay a price
that is set.
Let's fucking...
Let's all come to terms with
what things cost
and what you're going to pay.
I think you need the schmall.
I know. You need a... You got to bring the schmall I know
you need a
you gotta bring a schmall with you
cause Kevin loves to negotiate
yep
Kevin will get you a deal
that's what I needed
I needed a schmall
for sure
and he'll do it
he loves being deputized
yep
you know
he's like Doc Holliday
where he's like
now it's legal
he just pulls his jacket over
he's got a badge
it says permission to debate
or permission to haggle for Aaron.
I'll text him right now.
He came to my place.
He's like, this place is nice.
Should have asked for commission.
My beef of the week is with two people I like.
It's with Bruce Springsteen and Barack Obama.
Their new podcast is trash.
They have a podcast together?
It's like they're just too much on it.
You know what I mean?
It's like this folksy vision of like, you know, Bruce Springsteen.
I love Bruce Springsteen.
He's my favorite artist of all time.
Favorite musician of all time.
But I didn't like his book and I don't like listening to him talk. I think it gets, it almost becomes caricature of who he is, where it's all too like folksy and like, like nostalgic and kind of like, you know, uh, down
to earth. It's like, it's perfect in his music. But then when he's talking, he's like, you know,
Barack, I remember when I used to go down to the ice cream corner at Asbury park and, you know,
my, my crush Shelly Cecil would be over there and she'd get a scoop of Oreo ice cream for a dollar 99. And Brock's like,
you're like, what are you even talking about, dude? You have been famous for 50 years, Bruce.
I just think Bruce stick to music, Barack stick to being president. I don't know why. I don't
like this whole new Barack like media thing that he's doing where he's rolling out.
I mean, some of the docs are good.
That American Factory one is great.
But I don't know.
It just feels beneath him.
And then the Bruce Springsteen stuff is just like, I don't know.
He just sounds incredibly.
He's trying so hard to be in touch.
He just sounds incredibly out of touch.
And I love Bruce Springsteen.
But yeah, I got through 10 minutes of the podcast and I was just like, shut the fuck up, dude.
Just shut up.
Meanwhile, I have a podcast where we talk for two hours.
Yeah.
Oh, man.
Whatever.
Chad, who's your babe of the week?
My babe of the week is Gemma, the matriarch of the sons.
Just a badass lady, you know.
She's not afraid to do the dirty work and look after.
You know, she cares about Jack.
She cares about Clay. She cares about Clay.
She cares about the entire club.
She cares about the family.
She's Clay's old lady, which means she doesn't take shit from anyone.
And that means something in Charming, you know?
So my baby of the week is Gemma, you know?
Badass, badass lady.
Getting shit done.
Just being a boss.
Hell yeah.
Aaron, here's your baby of the week.
My baby of the week is my new car.
The hashtag dad tank.
It's a Jeep Grand Cherokee.
Great car. It's like driving on butter compared to
my old car which is an Xterra
2005 150,000 miles
come on come at me
DM me you only put 150,000
there no I had a
really short commute for like 6
years I drove like 3 miles to work
every day so nice yeah it was
beautiful
nice it's in really great shape but you know it's a I drove like three miles to work every day. Nice. Yeah, it was beautiful.
Nice. It's in really great shape.
But, you know, it's an SUV.
It's made for off-roading.
It's really bouncy.
And the Grand Cherokee is a little more sleek, a little more stylish, a little more for that city life.
Although it has the muscle for going out there.
But, yeah, it's just lovely.
It's lovely to finally have all the bells and whistles
because I've never had.
I've always bought cars where I'm like,
give me what will not break down.
So no power windows, no, like, all the stuff that could break.
And now it's like not all that stuff and
it's it's awesome nice dude dude my uh babe of the week is uh is a bro talk i find when i get into
real moments of crisis i actually talk more like a bro than when I ordinarily do. Like when me and my GF would be having hard conversations
and I felt very like raw and vulnerable,
I would talk like such a bro.
I'd be like, look, straight up.
I need you to keep it 100 with me right now, okay?
I was like, dude, like we're skewing off track.
I was like, I need you to step up and just keep it 100.
And I was like, man, I'm like so bro-y when it's your true
nature my true nature when everything is on the table and it's just my heart is exposed i'm just
a bro she's she's like i feel you dog she's like for real dog i'm trying to meet you halfway but
like i know you're coming in kind of aggro and i'm like for real i know i know i'm being aggro but
like that's my true nature and i need you to kind of aggro. And I'm like, for real, I know. I know I'm being aggro, but that's my true nature.
And I need you to kind of understand that.
But I'll work on being less reactive for sure, dude.
Chad, who's your legend of the week?
My legend of the week is Halfsack.
He's the prospect of the Sons of Anarchy.
I'm just doing Sons of Anarchy this week because I had...
That's all I've been doing is just watching.
I know I've been doing stuff, but it's just on my mind a lot.
Because I think they're all so badass.
I already had Jax, you know.
He's a fucking badass dude.
He fires me up.
But Halfsack steps up and he's the prospect and he's getting shit done.
He's a tough dude.
I think he's one of the best prospects I've ever seen.
Um,
and he's only got one nut.
He's doing this all with one nut.
He's got the courage of a guy with five nuts,
you know?
That's weird to picture.
I like it.
Five nuts in a sack.
Yeah.
That's crazy.
Someday.
Um, but yeah, I just, uh, what up Half Sack you're a legend dude
I really respect what you're doing for the
club for the squad
and taking it like
a champ so
yeah I hope you get
patched in legend
Aaron who's your legend
of the week my legend of the week?
My legend of the week is this guy named Mike Fellows.
He's a comic.
I think he's here in LA,
but he has a great Instagram account called Meming Into The Void.
I repost him a lot.
I put it in my stories a lot.
The guy's just such a heavy hitter.
Just makes these incredible memes. Slams on a lot the guy just such a heavy hitter just just makes these incredible memes uh slams
on a lot of uh he slams on both sides really um but i mean just takes ben shapiro to task which i
love had a great uh a great day when rush limbaugh died which was a great day for us all um
yeah so memeing into the void follow him get after it that's the instagram memeing into the void. Follow him. Get after it.
That's the Instagram memeing into the void?
Memeing into the void. Yeah.
Nice.
It's hard for me to get stoked when someone dies, but I respect people who do get stoked
when people die.
You do?
Yeah. Cause I like that gear. Like Christopher Hitchens, after Jerry Falwell died, Sean
Hannity was like, you should feel bad.
He's dead.
He's like, I don't feel bad.
He was bad for America.
I'm celebrating.
My legend of the week is Maverick from Top Gun.
Nice.
I just watched Top Gun the other day.
And look, I know he's a wild card, but when he's in the Top Gun dog fighting and he Viper's in there, the legend Viper.
And he's like, hey, I'm bailing on our wingman.
I need Viper.
And he's chasing Viper.
And then Viper's like, damn, this kid's good.
That just gets me fired up.
I love that he's got to go for it.
You know what I mean?
I love that he's got to go for it.
You know what I mean?
He's a dog on a bone, and he's always going to chase that rush, that challenge.
It's a great movie.
It's weird watching it now and kind of seeing some of the beats of it,
because when Goose dies, literally the next scene,
Viper, Tom Skerritt's in the locker room with him,
and he can tell that Maverick's feeling.
He's like, hey, pilots die.
You need to let them go.
I'm like, he died five minutes ago.
He's in his tighty-whities, right?
Yeah, he's just in there.
He's just looking in the bathroom mirror,
and he's like, oh, fuck.
Who am I without my best friend and my co-pilot?
I don't know if I'll be able to get through this.
I feel so much guilt.
And then Viper's like, hey, bro, get over it.
Like, he just, like, the body's not even cold yet.
The director's like, get in your tidy ways for this one.
I mean, he's naked the whole time.
Yeah.
A lot of good bodies in that movie.
Also, Iceman takes no punishment for Goose's death what was his uh culpability they
got caught in his jet wash right yeah that's what caused them to do the the spin because he wouldn't
get out of the way he wanted to keep taking the shot Iceman is kind of I mean the whole movie
he's just like trying to like find ways to I guess you, he's coming from a place where he wants Maverick
to be more responsible, but like every time he's like,
hey, so when you were in that negative G-Force dive
with the MiG, who was watching Cougars back?
And I'm like, that's so like aggressive.
You know what I mean?
But you know, they're fighter pilots.
Also, Mav, when they first hit on Kelly McGillis
and sing her the song and she's like hey I'm here with
another guy she goes into the bathroom
Mav follows her into the bathroom
she's like what are we going to hump on the toilet and then he
he grabs the counter
he's like I was thinking we could use this counter
he smiles at her I was like
whoa dude
too close for missiles
you're gonna blow
ma'am
he walks in
she's like I'm
taking a shit
she's like I'm
dumping dude
I gotta take a fat
shit I just had like
six chicken wings
he's like we should
fuck
we should fuck
in here
he walks in
he kicks open the
door and she's like
what are you doing
I'm taking a dump
and he's like
gives that like
trademark smile
he's like, gives that like trademark smile. He's like.
So I didn't know you'd be shitting in here.
She's like, it is the bathroom.
Yeah, cut to her face.
And she's sitting there.
Can you leave, bro?
And she's such a mensch.
When she leaves, she goes up to Goose and she's like, your friend was amazing.
Yeah.
And then Mav comes out.
He acts like he just had sex.
He's like, oh, God.
I think, you know, now, if you did that,
I'd be like, bro, you followed her into the bathroom?
I'm like, dude, you got to ease up, dog.
Yeah, well, she went to the gooshies.
He came in there while I was shitting.
Yeah, your friend just came in the bathroom while I was shitting.
Can you, like, corral this dude?
He comes out, and he's like, yeah, we fucked. And she's like like she told me that you came in while she was shitting
Yeah, my bed
He doesn't even kick it any you know he jumps up and like puts his head over he's oh my bad
He's like can you leave I gotta wipe my ass
Dude, I was at a bar in the mission in San Francisco one time and this guy was in the stall
for like 45 minutes
and everyone was banging
on the door like,
hey, what the hell's
going on in there?
Yeah.
And then I finally,
I'm like,
I gotta check on this dude.
Yeah.
So I jump up
and I stick my head over
and it was just a guy
taking a shit.
Like it was like,
I was surprised.
I was like,
what did I expect to see?
But he was literally in there
for like an hour and he wasn't responding to anyone. We're like, hey, buddy. Yeah see? But he was literally in there for like an hour,
and he wasn't responding to anyone.
We're like, hey, buddy! Come on, man.
What's going on in there? You good?
He got no answer. I guess he was just embarrassed.
And then finally I'm like, all right, I got to do something.
There's like eight people in this bathroom.
So I jump up and I stick my head over,
and just a guy looks up at me, shitting,
and I was like, oh, yeah, okay.
Dude, Cali McGillis goes in the bathroom, and I was like, oh yeah, okay. Kaleva Gilles goes in the bathroom.
Matt's just like, whoo.
Kicks up and the door walks in.
He's like, oh, fuck, my bed.
Oh, what are you doing in there?
Oh, that makes sense.
Goes up to Goosey and says, how'd it go, Matt?
She's taking a shit.
She's taking a shit.
I think we should leave the bar.
Can you pay the tab?
I'm going to be waiting in the car.
Goose is like, I wouldn't even do that to my wife, Meg Ryan.
I know, she's adorable in that movie.
He opens the door, he's like, whoa.
Whoa.
Whoa.
Puts on his sunglasses, like, my bad.
Then she shows up as his instructor the next instructor the next day he's like do you know do you guys know each other yeah i walked in right while she was taking a shit
how'd that happen well i followed her into the girl's bathroom just after meeting her trying
to fuck everyone's like all right mav we're gonna need you to just chill a little bit bro
you're a good pilot but you gotta chill a little bit that's probably not the first time he's done that
you know
alright cowboy
you came head to head with a mig
yeah I did
cool I'm gonna go to the bathroom
I know what she means
I know what she's talking about
alright Chad
what's your quote of the week
we gotta kick you out of Top Gun.
Why?
Because you're following girls
into the bathroom.
Yeah, you walked into
one of our top female professors
while she was taking a shit
trying to fuck her.
Yeah, and when you repeat it
back to me like that,
I totally understand
why I have to leave.
That's the whole movie.
But the thing is,
I'm kind of like a wild card.
I just follow my instincts.
Yeah.
Sometimes it backfires.
Fly by the seat of my pants.
Yeah.
He's just following everyone into the bathroom.
You know, like after Viper tells him he's got to get over it, Viper goes into the toilet.
He's like, I'm not over goose dye.
And they're like, yeah, dude, we understand process it.
But like, can you leave me alone?
Right after goose dies, Maverick goes to the, he's in the bathroom and he's taking a shit
and Viper just comes over the door.
He's like, hey, what's up, dude?
He's like, Viper, can you give me like a second?
I'm taking a shit.
And none of these pilots understand boundaries.
You got to get over it.
And the goose comes, head over.
He's like, yeah, man, sorry about that.
Hey, sorry about goose, man. It's like yeah i mean sorry about that hey sorry about goose
man it's all good it's all good sorry i'm fine it'd be uh it'd be another opportunity for like
a callback uh negative ghost rider the pattern is full it's like looking over the bathroom
uh negative kick the door over hey mav i heard you buzz the tower. Yeah, I did. Can you close it?
Is it really necessary to get this in now
Tony Scott's like this is gold
It is pretty funny if you just like followed a girl into the bathroom at a bar like in modern times
Yeah, yeah, maybe like nine women in there, too'd be like, what the fuck are you doing in here?
You're like,
I'm trying to sleep with her.
They'd take a photo of you.
Yeah.
Put it on Twitter.
Put it on the wall of the bar.
Yeah.
Like fuck.
Nav's like smiling in the photo.
He's like.
Top gun.
Chad, what's your quote of the week?
I gotta look it up.
This comes from, good chat what's your quote I gotta go with Sons of Anarchy Jax Teller I never lose either I win or I learn that's awesome that is awesome uh Aaron what's your quote of the week I gotta find
something I've been looking forever I'll go real quick my quote of the week I gotta find something I've been looking forever
I'll go real quick my quote of the week is
Adam Curtis on the Red Scare podcast
and he was talking about how we're all so
self-conscious in the contemporary age we're even like
self-conscious when we're alone like we just
constantly feel like we're being observed and he
was saying how in traditional culture
like modern culture
men are always watching
and women always feel like they're
being watched.
But he says that something has flipped and now men feel like they're always being watched
as well.
Oh, interesting.
And so we've all kind of inherited a culturally traditional feministic outlook.
You know, none of it's like innate.
It's just things that, you know, have been conditioned into us and are results of like
larger structures.
So I'm not speaking any like essential kind of masculinity or femininity, but that's just kind
of how it's been worked out. And now it's kind of changed. Now we all feel like we're being
observed all the time. And there's just this, uh, incredible self-consciousness that permeates
everything where, cause it's true. Even when I'm at home alone, just sitting there, I'm like,
I always feel like I have to do something. I always feel like I have to like almost be performing for like an invisible audience. You know what I mean?
I'm like, I can't just be sitting here doing nothing. I need to be working out or like,
you know, writing an email or something like that. And it's this, uh, I don't know. It's,
it's almost different than needing to feel productive. It's almost like needing to
appear productive. And it's, uh, yeah, I think, I think it's pretty true to how everyone's feeling right
now and you know i'm like a performer by nature so maybe it's like acute in me but i don't know
i think it's kind of across the board we're all just feeling a little too seen uh or ernie got
yours uh yeah it's from a j Jimmy Eat World song called Be Sensible.
It was a bonus track on Chase the Slight.
So it's available on iTunes, but you may not have had it if you have the album already.
I just like that the song is called Be Sensible, but the chorus is don't get comfortable.
Don't be sensible.
Swing with all you have and stop me if you can.
Nice.
That's awesome.
Chad, what's your phrase of the week for getting after?
Dude, can you get out of here?
I'm taking a shit.
Nice, dude.
Hey, Ron, what's yours?
Let's go follow some girls.
No, that's not right.
Follow some girls in the bathroom.
Yeah, we got a young listenership.
We should watch it.
Yeah, yeah.
Don't do that.
Yeah, please, guys.
You remember I always said about be sensible?
Don't.
Don't.
Don't be.
Don't do what I just said.
You got one here? I don't. I don't do what I just said you got one Aaron?
I don't I don't have one
alright mine is from
what's that guy's name
his name is Naval
something
he's like a really good talker
he was on
Joe Rogan
he was on the
Timothy Ferris podcast
I've heard Naval yeah
yeah
but he always posts
like a good series of quotes
on his Instagram
and I like this one a lot
whatever you deny yourself will become your mental prison.
Yeah.
It's true.
All right, dudes.
Yeah.
I was just thinking one more thing about the talk ending.
You know, when Kelly McGillis like appears in their class and he's not aware until that
moment and he just goes, she's like walks in and he's not aware until that moment. And he just goes, she's like, walks in.
He's like, call son Charlie.
And she just appears and he's like, oh.
But he's just like to Goose.
He's like, oh, Goose is like, what's up?
He's like, I walked down here taking a shit.
While trying to fuck her.
Dude, I was trying to fuck her and I was trying to fuck her and I walked in and I was taking a shit
ho
she walks in and she's like oh my god
call sign deuce
alright
guys check out our merch
shopcgd.com
we got fresh new tees
hoodies hats
represent Stoke Nation support us
that'd be much appreciated but
just you guys listening and being legends
is support enough
and keep leaving reviews
because that helps the podcast
helps boost us in the
I don't even know what but I've heard it helps so
if you like the pod leave us a review
and uh yeah that's it all right see you guys later yeah
if you need advice
these guys are really nice You wanna know
What to do and where to go
When you need someone to guide you
Just a half a throat beside you
Go and see
Go and see Let's go see I'm going deep I'm going deep
I'm going deep